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#I did not realise it did well on tumblr inch resting
abcd-em · 1 year
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I posted 7,739 times in 2022
That's 7,737 more posts than 2021!
326 posts created (4%)
7,413 posts reblogged (96%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@seek--rest
@karinaisloud
@spideymichelle
@justaleapoffaith
@rejectofsociety
I tagged 2,364 of my posts in 2022
#petermj - 219 posts
#spideychelle - 197 posts
#ask me anything - 195 posts
#peter parker - 184 posts
#my fics - 184 posts
#michelle jones - 133 posts
#fic recs - 92 posts
#spiderman - 85 posts
#nwh - 72 posts
#michelle x peter - 59 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#i cant wait for the next time i disappear from fandom and then get reminded of a fic that changed me and have to undergo this process again
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
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Peter Isn't Dead
Peter Parker died in battle six months ago. There was no body, but they all knew. So, why has MJ seen him in the backgrounds of newspaper clippings halfway across the country?
MJ embarks on a road trip of a lifetime to hunt down her pressumed-dead husband and bring him back to where he belongs. She starts to realise there are much bigger forces at play.
Based on Alice Isn't Dead
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55 notes - Posted June 29, 2022
#4
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Mover Awayer
“I like you.” MJ tells him.
“I know.” Peter nods.
“And we won’t stay friends if we go to college as a couple.”
“You’ve said.”
“So we don’t go to college as a couple.” Peter opens his mouth to speak, but MJ cuts him off, squeezing his hand and being the one to step into his space this time. “We break-up mutually, let each other go the night before I move. We date and then have one big celebration of it all so we can go back to being friends afterwards.”
Chapter 1
55 notes - Posted November 7, 2022
#3
NWH Fic Round Up
Since NWH is back on everyone's minds... I'm gonna do some shameless self-promo and share my NWH compliant fics. (Also my attempt at starting to sort a more organised masterlist)
Enjoy!
Passed down like folksongs, our love lasts so long - Series
One of us has gotta keep a promise - completed
This series covers Peter, Michelle and Ned’s perspective of things as they regain their memories and try to come back together.
These can be read as standalones, but personally, I think they're better together
MJ has to deal with the aftermath of regaining her memories and finding out that Peter has already moved on.
There is no answer - one shot
While moving MJ finds a note she wrote to herself during NWH
In darkness or in daylight - one shot
Kraven's Last Hunt inspired. Peter is buried alive and has to dig himself out.
We could be the way forward (and I know I'll pay for it) - one shot
Socialite MJ meets Spider-Man again after years apart when she attends a function with one Harry Osborn
It's nice to have a friend - one shot
MJ's perspective on her friendship with Ned and Peter from Pre-Hoco through to Post NWH.
You can hear it in the silence - one shot
Little moments of love between Peter and MJ
You and I walk a fragile line - one shot
Peter's the last of the Parker Line. He didn't think it'd go like this - it's about THAT scene
He's gonna burn this house to the ground - WIP
Dream sharing... or rather, nightmare sharing. Peter really can't catch a break when it comes to magic.
64 notes - Posted March 16, 2022
#2
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Everybody Talks
Collab with @seek--rest
For the darling, beloved @spideymichelle
"I've seen what you can do. I want you to take point on this."
She knows better than to celebrate before she's gotten all the information, seen huge campaigns pulled before they can ever be launched - from both sides, planning and participating.
MJ knows it all feels too good for the moment. There has to be something that balances the scale.
There’s always a catch.
"Who’s the client?"
"The Avengers."
Her brain stops for a moment. The sound of the office cutting out behind her as she takes in what has just been said. She wonders if Ned had actually switched her with one of his AI - like she's stuttering to reboot.
At the thought of Ned, a face and a mask flashes into her mind. Empty spaces at lunch tables and a missing name on registers. Forlorn expressions and the early days of a tentative new friendship spent checking silent phones.
“No.”
Chapter 1
64 notes - Posted November 5, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
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Behind Glass Doors
“They think we hate each other!”
“But we don’t.” She says. Her words are slow and drawn out like she’s struggling to follow. Peter knows he can get in his own head sometimes, but he feels like this isn’t one of those instances.
“Exactly!”
“So why does it matter?” She asks. Her words cut straight to the point. There’s not anything they can do. Coming out and saying ‘well, no. Actually. Spider-Man does not hate MJ Watson, in fact, he thinks about her quite regularly and has been living with her for the past eighteen months’ wasn’t a possibility.
For @spideychelleweek Day 3 & 6: Established Relationship & Secret Relationship/Fake-Dating (or hating in this instance)
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80 notes - Posted June 13, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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baekhvuns · 9 months
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Ok so i think it's mostly a blur but now tht i think abt i found you thru twt as well. Interesting story, bcz i had no idea what twt was used for??? plus i had no social presence whatsoever, i still don't. So a few of my frnds suggested me to download a few apps like insta 💀 I didn't hv it back then, twt and Snapchat. So currently I only have the last two apps, where I don't do nothing, just scan the world arnd me 😭 like IDC abt the posts or streaks or whtv. I'm a grandmother ok?
BUT as I made an acct on twt i was scrolling thru things and YK the thing where they ask ur interests, so i just clicked on kpop AND specifically went for ateez. And in a few moments I saw so many twts BUT one of them caught my eye. Idk but someone had linked your fic there and it was lnfila. I was enchanted by the moodboard 🤧🤧 it was pretty. So then I was like how about we give this a try and i found out ur official acct is on Tumblr. So i shot down twt and deleted my account and forever came to settle in Tumblr land 😀 honestly i had thought tht u were one of those writers tht wrote a masterpiece years ago then vanished frm the face of the earth BUUTTTT
I realised u were still active and tht made me so happy 😭 so after reading all those ffs i sent u the submission of my cringey ass review 😭😭 but yeah such a beautiful story right? Anyways, it's raksha bandhan today...AND I GOT SOAN PAPDI AS A GIFT 😭😭 like I just don't like it now dude, as a kid i was obsessed but now it just don't suit my taste buds. But the urge I'm having to ship those boxes to South Korea 😞 for a special someone.
And NOOO YOU'RE SO RIGHT IT'S ALWAYS JK AND TAEHYUNG AND THE THUMBNAILS 😭😭 GOD THE THUMBNAILS-
OHH OK so I read ur songs reccs AND DAMN BRO THOSE PLAYLISTS THO ✋😭 I hv to re read the fics again. Also, if you had to dedicate one ost for all the hwa fics BUT make them bollywood songs, which ones would you choose?
wait this is such a cute but chaotic find 😭😭😭 no coral media presence? that’s exactly how one should live 🤚🏻 my digital footprint is nonexistent my only achievement <3
LMFAOOOO SO THE MOOD BOARD CAUGHT UR ATTENTION 😭😭😭 and did not know let’s not fall in love was ur first fic by me??? inch resting, LMFAOOO IT WAS FUN READING THEM 😭😭😭 a very beautiful story indeed!! AAAA TO U TOO!! BDMWHDKWHDKS NOT THAT FUCKING THING SEND IT AWAY REGIFT IT REGIFT IT!!! SEND IT TO THAT SOMEONE IN KR,, also apparently there’s some sort of a event happening today ??? that’s not auspicious so they’re asking ppl to tie them early??? sus idk if u heard it but i heard it so im sure u did fbsnbdkvlvkc
AND IM CONVINCED JK HAS READ THEM 😭😭 THERES NO FUCKING WAY HE DIDNT GIGGLE AND SHIT READING THEM BFMWBDM
OOOOO that’s so interesting, will dig into my bollywood playlist rn!!
duke : janam janam? or jashan e bahara for the sakes of royalty <3
just friends : i think i will chose miss aish’s crazy kia re + marjavaan from the movie fashion! + humraah
mafia : jannatein kahan by kk BECAUSE THE OHHHOOOO PARTS FBNWHDKWJK
divorce : raabta for the lyrics 😭😭
khronus : main yahaan hoon from veer zaara THE LYRICS FIT LIKE A DRESS
bodyguard : teri meri reprise version HOW CAN I NOT + love is a waste of time from pk for the fun moments + tum se hi??? yes.
rewrite the stars : ilahi + hawayein ??? and the new srk one form jawan i think it’s called challeya??? yeah, all the trip sound tracks + safarnama
bbhwa : tum mile + baby when u talk to me from patalia house 😭😭😭 do u rmr that movie 😭😭
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Do you have any fic recs of Sherlock being soft for John and John only.
Hey Nonny! 
Ahhhhhhhh your request had me thinking that yes I do, and I did tag a few fics with “soft Sherlock”, but I’ve never started a list, so here ya go!
SOFT SHERLOCK
See also: Sherlock Soft With Children
Soft. Happy. Content. by inevitably_johnlocked (G, 223 w., 1 Ch. || Sleepy Cuddles, Bed Sharing, Slice of Life, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Spooning, Morning After, Sherlock POV) – Sherlock reflects on his state of mind. Part 6 of I-J's Tumblr Ficlet Collection
A Perfect Figure by ecb327 (K, 622 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, First Person POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Introspection, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Light Angst) – Sherlock build a spot in his mind palace for John.
I Knew You Loved Me by inevitably_johnlocked (T, 743 w., 1 Ch. || Morning Cuddles, Fluff, Clingy Sherlock, Idiots in Love, Slice of Life, Morning After, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Declarations of Love, Pet Name, Bed Sharing, Snuggles) – John and Sherlock share a lie-in the morning after their first time. So fluffy and gross your teeth will fall out. Part 4 of I-J's Tumblr Ficlet Collection
Peacock by ClassyGirlsWearPearls (T, 1,189 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, Cranky Sherlock, Soft John, Hand Holding, Soft Sherlock) – A study in Sherlock and John.
Mizzle by MrsNoggin (K, 1,233 w., 1 Ch || Friendship, Fluff, Platonic Johnlock, Humour, Slice of Life) – John can't decide if it's raining or not. Sherlock doesn't understand.
And, Usually, He's the One Who GIVES Me a Headache by Cumberbatch Critter (T, 1,315 w., 1 Ch. || Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, POV John, Cranky John, Headaches, Head Massage) – A migraine is never fun.
Together is What we Have, Together Protects Us by Phantom of the Black Pearl (K+, 1,566 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF, Friendship / Platonic or Slash, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure Sherlock, Worried Sherlock, Slice of Life) – After a case one evening in the flat Sherlock voices a concern that causes the pair to consider why they've chosen to stick together after all that's happened
Here to Stay by MockJayPhoenix12 (K, 1,574 w., 1 Ch. || Post Reunion, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Headache, Bed Sharing, Care Taker Sherlock, Hand Holding, Fluff) – On Sherlock's first day home, John wakes with a migraine.
Evermore by SosoHolmesWatson (G, 2,068 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4,  5-Year-Old Rosie, Love Confessions, Song Fic, Parentlock, Oblivious John, Pining Sherlock, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Disney Songs, Beauty and the Beast) – For the past years, John and Sherlock have lived at Baker Street again, raising Rosie together--as friends and nothing more. Ever since the little girl has watched her first Disney movie, she is obsessed with princesses. When John comes home one day, he finds his friend and his daughter in the middle of a reenactment of her current favourite. Part 1 of Made of Music
Let the Sun Fade Out by nothingislittle (E, 2,711 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff & Smut, Praise Kink, PWP, Obsessed Sherlock, Bottomlock, Heart-Tearing Love) – "He could warm the sun itself, Sherlock thinks, could heat their flat with just his presence, could brighten the room with one dazzling smile or just the sparkling in his eyes. John is everything, he’s beautiful and he shines, he’s everything."
Unquantifiable by 221b_hound (M, 2,799 w. 1 Ch. || Est. Rel., Sherlock/Sally Friendship, Grumpy John, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Pet Names, Texting, Sweet Sherlock, Princess Bride References) – John remains a terrible and foul-tempered patient, but he does try to make up for it with pet names and text message silliness. In the meantime, Sally Donovan visits Baker Street for a hint about the Milverton case, and has to deal with a Sherlock Holmes who can't find words big enough to thank her for saving John's life at the warehouse. For afters, there's a viewing of The Princess Bride. Part 33 of the Unkissed series
Pillow Talk by 221b_hound (E, 2,925 w., 1 Ch. || Post-HLV, Est. Rel., Preening Sherlock, Limpet Sherlock, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Sex on Furniture, Scent Kink, Masturbation, Fluff, Soft Sherlock,  Sherlock’s Bum) – John gets home late from work and Sherlock is nowhere to be seen. John walks through the flat, distracted by memories of all the excellent sex they've been having, and finally finds Sherlock asleep in the upstairs room - apparently having fallen asleep mid-wank while inhaling the scent of John's pillow. Well, you should always finish what you start, John thinks... Part 3 of Lock and Key
The General Idea by agirlsname (T, 3,022 w., 1 Ch. || Retirement, Promise of Forever / Proposal, POV John, First Kiss, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Soft Sherlock, Idiots in Love, Crying / Emotional Sherlock, Love Confessions) – After twenty years of friendship, John is used to Sherlock acting weirdly. But the news Sherlock finally brings himself to deliver change the carefully built dynamics between them, and John realises it's time to act.
Affirmation by jamlockk (E, 3,096 w., 1 Ch. || First Time, Dev. Rel., PWP, Love Declarations, Emotional/Overwhelmed Sherlock, Comforting/Caring John, Gross Fluff) – "Sunlight dappled John's skin, casting a glow across his spreadeagled form as he dozed among the rumpled sheets. Sherlock knew the expression on his face was hopelessly soft but for once did not care about showing his true feelings so openly. He simply stood there, in the doorway, gazing at the impossibly beautiful man currently snuffling softly in his slumber." Part 8 of All the ways we love
Untouched by KittieHill (E, 3,239 w., 1 Ch. || Kissing, Frottage, Virgin Sherlock, Body Worship, Sherlock’s Scars Mentioned, Masturbation, PWP, Rimming, Multiple Orgasms) – Sherlock leaked a lot. John had never needed lubricant. John loved watching it, had once spent an entire afternoon edging Sherlock so he could watch as the thick precome drip, drip, dripped onto Sherlock's belly.
Morning Sunlight by slashscribe (E, 3,565 w., 1 Ch. || PWP, Morning Sex, Fluff, PWP, Established Rel., Soft Idiots) – A thin band of soft morning light peeks between the curtains and stretches across John’s torso, laying dormant across his forearm, dipping into the space between his arm and his chest, illuminating his right nipple but just brushing the edge of his left, disappearing into his armpit, and reappearing again right over Sherlock’s eyes where his head rests, nestled against John’s shoulder. Sherlock is not annoyed by the light’s intrusion on his sleep, not when it rests so soft and tantalizing on John’s skin, a work of unintentionally erotic art. A PWP with so much emotion.
Living Musical by VeeTheRee (G, 4,149 w. 1 Ch. || Est. Rel., Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Hobbies, Summer, Song Fic, POV Sherlock, Painting, Play Fighting, Soft Sherlock, Dancing, Love Declarations, Hair Petting, Promise of Forever) – A one-shot of John and Sherlock being domestic during summer. There is paint, fluff, and music from Imagine Dragons, namely from the album 'Speak To Me', specific song in this one-shot is 'Living Musical'. Part 1 of the Happy Fluffy Johnlock Time series
Date Night by inevitably_johnlocked (G, 4,451 w., 1 Ch. || Anxious / Worried Sherlock, Caring John, Schmoopy Fluff, Fidget Cube, Baking / Cooking, Date Night, Established Relationship, POV Sherlock Holmes, Understanding John, Grumpy Sherlock, John’s Bum, Kisses, Hugs, Domestic Fluff, Touching, Hair Petting, Light Humour) – It's John and Sherlock's first Date Night as an official couple and Sherlock needs it to be PERFECT. Mrs Hudson helps. Part 7 of I-J's Tumblr Ficlet Collection
If He Knows by shamelessmash (M, 4,513 w., 1 Ch. || TSo3 Fic, Pining Sherlock, Bed Sharing, Angst, First Person Sherlock POV, Texting, Internal Monologue, Blanket Forts) – I imagine mornings: John handing me a cup of tea, hair sticking out at odd angles. How he would bend down to kiss me, smiling fondly as he pulls away. The way his skin crinkles at the corner of his eyes, the way his skin looks in the morning light. The soft sigh as he sits in his chair with the morning paper, the way his toes curl in the carpet, the way he rolls his shoulders before sinking deeper into his seat. I watch him, how he is when he is content, as it should be. As he deserves. Happy. With me.
all things warm and tender by darcylindbergh (E, 5,177 w., 1 Ch. || PWP, Romantic Fluff, Rimming/Anal/BJ’s, Body Worship) – Grinning and giggling, John slides back down under the sheet and pulls it over his head. He finds Sherlock waiting for him, eyes bright and hair wild, the firelight bleeding through the thin fabric, colouring everything in soft peach and topaz, and in that moment he is so suddenly, unexpectedly, ethereally beautiful that John forgets how to breathe.
Pillow Talk by scullyseviltwin (M, 5,183 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3, Angsty Fluff, Pillow Talk, Bed Sharing, Worried John, First Time Morning After, Soft Sherlock, Sexuality Discussion, Love Confessions, Kisses and Cuddles) – John has been looking at Sherlock for ages, it feels like.
a very soft epilogue (my love) by darcylindbergh (E, 5,395 w., 3 Ch. || Retirement, Domestic Fluff, Dancing, Dogs, Grumpy Old Men) – Across the pillows, Sherlock shifts and hums, the creases of his face deepening and then smoothing before settling. John watches him wake up, his chest swelling with affection and fondness, and thinks he’ll never get tired of Sherlock in the mornings, sleepy and soft. It’s been some forty-odd years, and John hasn’t gotten tired of it yet. Part 5 of things fairy tales are made of
Naked by sussexbound (E, 6,166 w., 1 Ch. || Frottage, Fluff, Intimacy, First Time, Love Declarations, Trust) – John takes a deep breath, and then lets out a long-suffering sigh. “Sherlock, how would you feel if you were sitting out here doing one of your bloody experiments, and I just waltzed out of the loo and started fixing myself breakfast completely starkers? Hmm…? ”Sherlock’s lips inch up at the corners into a pleased hint of a smile he can’t seem to suppress. Part 2 of Intimacy
Christmas by WhimsicalEthnographies (E, 7,673 w., 1 Ch. || Worried Sherlock, PWP, Drunkeness, Christmas, Est. Relationship, Idiots So In Love) – John feels a lump rise in his throat, and it hits him, again, that this beautiful, infuriating creature is his. Completely, one-hundred percent his.
How To Give Your Boyfriend Who Doesn't Know He's Your Boyfriend the Best Valentine's Day Ever by unicornpoe (T, 9,832 w., 1 Ch. || Valentine’s Day, Fluff and Crack, Soft Sherlock, POV Sherlock) – Sherlock is pretty sure that John Watson is his boyfriend. He's also pretty sure that John doesn't know it. But with a little help from a magazine, some friends, three crepes, five dates, one awesome CD, and a stalker van, John is bound to realize just in time for Valentine's Day.
Someone I Love by hudders-and-hiddles (M, 10,002 w., 2 Ch. || Canon Compliant, HLV-Filler Fic, Pre-Slash, Jealous John, PIning Sherlock, Angst & Fluff, UST/URT, Dog Tags) – John gets married and Sherlock finds comfort in wearing John's identity tags around his wrist.
To be loved by Strange_johnlock (E, 12,436 w., 8 Ch. || Post S3, Established Relationship, First Person POV Sherlock, Pet Names, Soft Sherlock, Mild ADHD, Protective John, Captain Watson, Body Appreciation, Bottomlock, Rough Sex, Travelling for Holidays, Introspection, Sherlock Loves John So Much It Hurts) – John is so deeply integrated into the work, both as my conductor of light, and as a great shot with a vicious right hook who tackles men -and women- no matter their size all in my defense. He protects me with all he can without question, and this loyalty is surely more than I deserve. Or: Sherlock is counting his blessings.
holding steady by darcylindbergh (E, 12,724 w., 4 Ch. || Post S4, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Growing Old, Gone Fishing, Mood without Plot, Soft Sherlock, Caring Sherlock, POV John Third Person, Anxious Sherlock, First Kiss / Time, Touching, Feeling Old, Sherlock Worship, Crying Sherlock, Cuddles, Comforting, Introspection, Retirement, Hand Holding, Forehead Kisses, Caring John, Bed Sharing, Emotional Love Making) – Sitting on a thick wool blanket at the end of a rickety dock side-by-side, legs dangling over the edge, a styrofoam container of wet, dark dirt between them, they’re fishing. John knows what this is about. This is about finally figuring it out.
On The Fence by BeautifulFiction (T, 13,770 w., 1 Ch. || Fencing, Case Fic, First Kiss, Insecure John, Pining John, Hug, Greg Finds Out) – The murder of the King's College fencing champion leads to revelations about Sherlock's past. Will it be the point that tips them from friends to lovers, or will they remain on the fence?
The Invocation of Saint Margaret by Ewebie (E, 15,831 w., 1 Ch. || POV John,  Crossing Timelines, Light Angst, Fluff, Series 3 John / Series 1 Sherlock, The Matchbox, Mushy Romance, First Time, Bisexual John, Pining John, Bottomlock, Love Confessions, Sensuality, Emotional Love Making, Snippets of Time) – When Sherlock Holmes opens the matchbox from The Sign of Three and John finds himself years in the past, back to that first dinner at Angelo's with a much younger Sherlock Holmes. Is he dreaming?
Division by MrsNoggin (E, 19,542 w., 11 Ch. || Coffee Shop AU || First Kiss/Time, Fluff, Barista Sherlock, Clingy Sherlock, POV John, John’s Limp, Bed Sharing, Fluff, Sleepy Cuddles, Sensuality, Touching, Virgin Sherlock, Insecure John) – John likes mysteries. And every morning he dips into the local independent coffee bar with his newspaper and ponders another... one Sherlock Holmes.
Out of the Woods by SilentAuror (E, 20,471 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Romance, Slow Burn, Flirting, Drunk Sex, Practical Jokes, POV Sherlock, Bottomlock, Possessive John, Pining Sherlock, Frustrated Wanking, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, First Kiss/Time, Virgin Sherlock, Love Confessions, Soft Sherlock, Dancing, Bum Appreciation, Hanging out with the Yard) – Sherlock is fairly certain that John has taken to flirting with him of late, but can't be entirely certain of it. At least, not until a case takes them into a forest, along with Lestrade's team and something happens that will change everything about their lives...
How To Unfold a Heart by elwinglyre (E, 25,477 w., 7 Ch. || Post S4 Fix It, BAMF John, Mentioned Eurus, POV First Person Sherlock, Case Fic, Fluff, Slow Burn, Topping from the Bottom, 3 Yr Old Rosie, Introspection, Sexual Fantasies, John Worship, Ogling, Hand Holding, Kidnapping, Domesticity, Sherlock Whump, First Kiss/Time, Doctor John, Caring John, Soft Sherlock, Sensuality, Touching, Crying, Love Confessions, Anxious Sherlock, Rimming, Toplock, Fingering, Bossy Bottom John) – To Sherlock’s dismay, John’s return to Baker Street with Rosie is only temporary. Sherlock’s daily visits to Regent Park with John and Rosie illuminate his lost childhood memories and missed opportunities. But with each trip to the park, Sherlock also feels a growing sense of hope. That is until the past horrors return unexpectedly in a cryptic note folded in the shape of a heart. To decipher the message, Sherlock must uncover the nature of the hearts around him, including his own.
A Quiet Life by DiscordantWords (M, 25,176 w., 6 Ch. || Post S4, Retirement, POV Sherlock, Awkwardness, Established Relationship, Family Dynamics, Minor Character Death, Questionable Parenting Choices, Non-Linear Narrative, 20 Year Old Rosie, Meddling Mycroft, Pining Sherlock, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Angst, Sherlock Whump) – There had been three days of silence and a funeral. Sherlock had the terrible feeling that whatever happened next would depend, entirely, on him.
How To Unfold a Heart by elwinglyre (E, 25,477 w., 7 Ch. || Post S4 Fix It, BAMF John, Mentioned Eurus, POV First Person Sherlock, Case Fic, Fluff, Slow Burn, Topping from the Bottom, 3 Yr Old Rosie, Introspection, Sexual Fantasies, John Worship, Ogling, Hand Holding, Kidnapping, Domesticity, Sherlock Whump, First Kiss/Time, Doctor John, Caring John, Soft Sherlock, Sensuality, Touching, Crying, Love Confessions, Anxious Sherlock, Rimming, Toplock, Fingering, Bossy Bottom John) – To Sherlock’s dismay, John’s return to Baker Street with Rosie is only temporary. Sherlock’s daily visits to Regent Park with John and Rosie illuminate his lost childhood memories and missed opportunities. But with each trip to the park, Sherlock also feels a growing sense of hope. That is until the past horrors return unexpectedly in a cryptic note folded in the shape of a heart. To decipher the message, Sherlock must uncover the nature of the hearts around him, including his own.
Deck the Halls by itsalwaysyou_jw (T, 31,018 w., 24 Ch. || Advent Fic / Multiple One-Shots, Assorted Tags) – One Johnlock ficlet for every day leading up to Christmas. Who is ready for pining, first kisses, established Johnlock, and everything in between? This collection of stand-alone ficlets will have it all.
Gold Rush by ShirleyCarlton (E, 71,783 w., 17 Ch. || Post S3 / No Mary, Friends to Lovers, Mentions of Past Sexual Abuse, First Kiss, Case Fic, Slow Burn, Alternating POV, Switchlock, Angst with Happy Ending, Marriage Proposal, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abduction, Anxious/Insecure Sherlock, Miscommunication, Emotional Lovemaking) – John has divorced Mary and pops round to 221B one evening to find Sherlock in the middle of a case. As Sherlock tries to find the identity of a young woman’s stalker, John realises he can no longer deny his feelings for Sherlock – which then, to their befuddlement, turn out to be mutual. Shy kisses and tentative embraces ensue. But will Sherlock be able to cast off a shadow from his past that he thinks might prevent John from wanting to stay?
Definitions by siennna (T, 101,528 w., 12 of ? Ch. || Dev. Rel., Pining, Fluff and Romance, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Fluff, Cuddles, Girl’s Night, Texting, Virgin Sherlock, Drunk Sherlock, Background Mollstrade, Hair Petting, Laying on Lap) – Sherlock’s journey in defining his flat mate and stumbling through the muddled world of emotion. {{This feels complete; the chapter count is listed as ? but I feel like it is done}}
Against the Rest of the World by SilentAuror (E, 151,714 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-TRF, Hiatus Fic, POV First Person Sherlock, Present Tense, First Kiss/Time, Big Brother Mycroft, Escaping from Capture, Soft Sherlock, Toplock, Insecurity, Infidelity, Travelling, Introspection, Pining Sherlock, Depression, Fantasies, Yearning for the Past, PTSD Sherlock, Suicidal Ideation) – Sherlock has been away from London for nine hundred and twelve days and counting, and has no idea what sort of reception to expect when he finally returns.
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angryschnauzer · 4 years
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No i In Team
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Summary: Having been dumped, you find yourself standing in the mud and rain as a bootcamp instructor yells at you. Finally you snap, telling him your mind before storming off. Later when he appears at your room to see if you are ok, he makes sure you are fully over your ex, proving that some men are a lot better than others.
Pairing: Captain Syverson x Female Reader (no race or body type mentioned) Fandom; Henry Cavill, Sand Castle - Movie
Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Unprotected Sex, Rough sex, vaginal sex, doggy style, cowgirl, inappropriate use of a mini sombrero. 
I do not operate a tag list, however please follow @angryschnauzerwrites​ and put that blog onto notifications. You will then get an alert every time i post something.
My masterlist got too large for tumblr, so now you can check out my AO3 on THIS LINK to find my previous stories.
No I In Team
This was it. This was the worst decision you had ever made. In fact, the worst collection of the worst decisions. Ever. In the history of decision making. 
The rain continued to pour. Any sane person would not be standing in the middle of an assault course in this weather. They certainly wouldn’t be joining in on a ‘team building get-away’ when you had in fact already quit the company and it just finished your notice period. And they really wouldn’t have come when their ex was parading his new girlfriend around and they were on the same team as you. 
Okay, so the last bit wasn’t in your control; your ex had in fact dumped you - via text - whilst you were in the cab there. Which honestly was a bit of a surprise seeing as you were meant to be sharing a room, and you had splashed out on one of the luxury rooms in the hotel where the corporate events were held at. He was a little surprised - which proved how much of a dumbass he really was - when you refused to let him and his new girlfriend take your room, and you stay in the smaller and cheaper one she had paid for. It was simple, you had paid, they could fuck off.
The other girlfriend, now that was a surprise. You didn’t want to hate her, she seemed very sweet but there were definitely a few sandwiches short of a picnic going on with her. Your weasel of an ex had cited a number of reasons for the break up, all laying blame on you, but really you had known it was coming and were quite relieved in a way… he was now someone else's problem.
However, because of being blindsided by the break up, you had continued on autopilot and now found yourself soaked to your skin, and the enormous brute that ran the bootcamp was doing his best to yell at every single person to ‘encourage’ them. Jesus christ you weren’t built for climbing up ropes and flinging yourself over 10ft walls, and with each passing obstacle you were falling further and further behind.
“COME ON! GET YOUR SORRY ASS OVER THAT ROPE NET!”
Rolling your eyes you let out a huff and slid-ran through the three inch deep mud, starting to climb the net that led up to a rope ladder you were expected to climb across as it was suspended over a pool of muddy water. You looked into the distance, your ‘team mates’ having well and truly left you behind, and as you reached the bottom of the net you looked up at it, taking in how muddy and slippery it was where 11 other people had already climbed up it;
“ARE YOU AFRAID OF A NET? PULL YOURSELF UP AND STOP FUCKING AROUND IN THE MUD”
The ‘Captain’ yelled at you from six feet away. Jesus you were fed up with him. The guy looked like he lived, breathed, and slept military. At the start of the course he had introduced himself as Captain Syverson, but everyone was to refer to him as Captain. His fatigues and t-shirt were plastered to his skin, his beard soggy as puffs of steam came from his mouth as he continued to yell at you. 
You turned to him, watching as he took a single stride and was just a foot from you, taking a deep breath to yell again before you pushed your hand up and pressed a single finger to his mouth;
“No”
He stopped, unable to hide his surprise as his eyebrows shot up before you pulled your finger away.
“Get your ass up that net, NOW!”
Crossing your arms you repeated yourself;
“No. I will not”
“THERE IS NO I IN TEAM!”
“No. There isn’t. But there is an i in Vibrator”
“W-what?”
“Vibrator. Dildo too. And i quit”
“You can’t quit”
“Unless you are going to throw me over your shoulder and carry me across that net and ladder, i quit. I am going to go back to my expensive hotel room, stopping at the bar to buy a bottle of the hardest liquor they have, have a hot bath, and give myself something a man has never been able to”
“What’s that?”
“An orgasm”
You turned on your heel and started towards the hotel building in the distance, leaving the Captain speechless in the rain. When you were halfway across the lawns you could hear him yelling at the rest of the team, but you couldn’t give a fuck, you’d had enough.
-
The bath was amazing. You’d spent a good hour if not two in it letting the spa jets send streams of bubbles over your body, and had in fact given yourself the first of many orgasms you had planned for your evening. You had been disappointed when you’d discovered that the bar wouldn’t sell bottles of alcohol, but the bartender had quietly told you that if you ordered the corporate entertainment tray over room service they were obliged to send up a selection of miniatures with mixers and nibbles.
You were still standing in your towel when you heard a knock at the door, puzzled to be interrupted as you had the Do Not Disturb sign hanging on the handle. Approaching the peephole you looked through, surprised to see who was on the other side. Opening the door a few inches you looked out, and saw him leaning casually against the doorframe, now wearing dry clothes that accentuated how he was 101% muscle, from the kingfisher blue sweater that made his eyes even brighter, to the dark denim that clung to his muscled thighs, a smirk played across his face when he saw what you were wearing;
“Hi”
“Captain?”
He shifted and held out a bottle of Tequila;
“The bar doesn’t sell liquor by the bottle”
He motioned for you to take it, and as you did so you swung the door open a little more, seeing him look you up and down, his eyes growing a little darker as he licked his lips;
“I thought about what you said…”
“Which part”
“About what words the letter i are in” you didn’t realise but he had shifted a little closer, his toes now over the threshold of the room; “Cos’ i thought of another word that has the letter i in”
You cocked your head to the side, a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth, already gauging the reason his thickly muscled man was at your hotel room door with a smile and alcohol;
“Dick has got an i in”
“You’re absolutely right” you pulled the cork from the bottle of Tequila, taking a sip and grinning at the captain as you fiddled with the little hat that hung from the neck of the bottle, taking a step back as he slowly crept further into the room. A flash of lightning from the bad weather outside illuminated the room, and yet the air between your bodies almost sparked from the energy you were giving off.
“But my favourite letter is U”
“Ok… i’m waiting for the punchline…”
“Because that’s in the word Tongue, and i would very much like my tongue to be in u”
Closing the gap between you, you pressed two fingertips to his chest, the soft blue sweater he now wore warm to the touch;
“That…” you paused, walking your fingers up his chest with each word: “Was the best pick up line i’ve ever heard, Captain”
Pushing the door shut behind him, his slid his hand into the split of your towel, his warm palm resting on your hip before pulling you flush with his chest;
“You can call me Sy”
-
He had lifted you into his arms, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist, the towel trapped between your bodies but now unraveled as it dragged along the floor, your naked back and ass cooling in the air of the room, but soon warmed by two large hands as they roamed over your skin. His kiss was rough, his tongue licking into your mouth as his beard tickled your face. 
You hadn’t even realised he’d gotten to the bed until he had pulled away and sat down, pulling you down with him so you were straddling his waist;
“Ride my face, let me give you what you need” he growled, his hands on your ass pushing you up his body.
You’d quickly scrambled to set the bottle onto the nightstand before straddling his face, his eyes sparkling with mischief as his massive hands cupped your ass. He pulled you down until you were literally seated on his face, his thick beard brushing against your thighs and ass, his tongue burying itself between your slick folds, teasing you open. 
Winding one hand through his short brown hair, the soft chocolate curls caressed your fingers as your other hand rested against the headboard of the bed to steady yourself, his eagerness already rapidly pushing you towards an orgasm, your body still buzzing from the one you’d given yourself in the bath. 
“Oh fuck… Sy, Jesus Christ your tongue…”
You’d never met a man with a tongue so wide and juicy, the thick muscle pulsing within your cunt as his nose teased your clit, and soon you were shaking above him, attempting to push up on your legs from the intensity of it, only for his strong grip to tighten on your ass and pull you back down onto his face.
“Ride my tongue Darlin’” you heard his muffled voice, and as you looked down you saw his face was flushed but his eyes held nothing but mischief.
Tossing your head back you let yourself go, calling out his name as you unashamedly rode his tongue to an intense orgasm, flooding his face with your juices. 
Limp and pliable, you felt him lifting you before setting you down on the bed, his lips finding your neck and shoulders as he pressed kisses to your skin. The storm raged outside the window, rain lashing against the glass and making you feel even more enclosed in as Sy’s body covered your own. Finally enough of your senses returned that you grabbed his face and pulled him in for a fierce kiss, tasting yourself on his tongue. When he finally broke away from your lips he started to kiss down your body, only for you to tug at his soft blue sweater, wanting the knitwear gone;
“Okay ok Darlin’...”
“Want to see you… feel you…” you were lust drunk now, a fire in the pit of your belly where you wanted nothing more than this beast of a man to split you open and fuck you raw.
He let out a low belly laugh, pushing off you and standing, a grin on his face as he saw you watching him as he stripped for you.
With his sweater tossed aside, he toed his boots off as his hands made quick work of his jeans, revealing a pair of tight black boxer briefs that were obscenely bulging at the front. Clenching your thighs together did little to satisfy the arousal, and as he tucked his thumbs under the elastic of his underwear you bit your lip as he teased you, pulling the elastic down to reveal the thick bush of hair and a tantalizing peek at the thick root of his shaft. Inch by inch he lowered his underwear until they dropped to the floor, and your mouth was agape as you took his size in all his glory;
“Wow, you really do have the equipment for the BDE you give off...” He paused and looked at you, cocking an eyebrow as you started to explain; “It means big…”
“I know what it means” he smirked, hooking his finger at you and watching as you crawled over the bed until your face was level with his rapidly hardening dick; “Why don’t you show me how good that mouth of yours is?”
Wrapping your hands around his hot flesh you could feel him growing harder and thicker under your touch, leaning your head forwards until you could take him into your mouth, tasting him on your tongue as he grunted above you;
“That’s it Darlin’, get me nice and wet, gonna have this buried in you sooner or later, the harder you get me the more dick you get inside you”
He rested his hand on the back of your head, guiding you to take him deeper but without being pushy about it. When his tip nudged at the back of your throat you fought back the feeling, looking up with watery eyes as his own bored into your soul as his dick tried to do the same to the back of your skull.
Holding you deep he finally with a gasp pulled himself out of your mouth with a string of curses, stroking your hair as you coughed and sucked in precious oxygen;
“Fuck, that mouth of yours is a thing of wonder Darlin’... but i want to get into that sweet cunt of yours… how do you need it?”
“N-need it?”
He gently pushed you onto your back, crawling over you until he was poised and ready to go;
“Yeah, need it. You’ve just broken up with some limp dick, how do you need me to fuck you?”
“W-what are the options?”
“You want slow and gentle, or you want me to fuck you like a beast and toss you around like a rag-doll”
“Beast mode please”
With a low growl he grinned as he surged forward and caught your lips with his own, his tongue pushing its way into your mouth as he took complete control. You felt him gripping his dick as he swiped it through your soaked folds, dousing himself with your wetness before he pulled away and grasped you by the hips as he knelt on the bed, pulling you up his thighs before thrusting his fat girth into you with one swift movement.
“HOLY FUCK!”
“That’s it Darlin, take my dick all the way. I’m gonna fuck you so good you’ll forget about anyone else that has ever disappointed you”
Gritting his teeth he moved your body like you were a rag-doll, pulling you onto his hardness as you could do little but to go limp and let your mind get flooded by the pleasure he was giving your body thanks to the best sex you’d ever had. Gripping at the sheets you felt an orgasm start to building within you;
“Sy… keep doing that… i’m gonna cum…”
With a smile and a grunt he did exactly as you asked, keeping his pace fast and steady as you lost control around him, your back arching as your legs shook and you came hard. You were trembling from the force of the aftershocks as he slowed down and finally stilled, letting you relax onto the duvet as he covered your body with his, pressing openmouthed kisses to your chest, murmuring against the soft flesh;
“These titties are spectacular”
He moved a little and you felt that he was still hard, a smirk back on his face;
“Oh i’m not done yet Darlin’, that was just an intermission”
He pulled out of you and you found yourself being flipped over, your ass pulled up as he filled you from behind this time, his thickness splitting your walls open and his massive hands found their way to your breasts, pinching your nipples between his thumbs and forefingers as he pile drove into you from behind;
“Feel so fucking good Darlin, love the way your cunt feels around my dick, wanna feel you cum again before i shoot my load in ya’, then you can have a breather before round two”
Your eyes went wide; this was still only round one? Fuck, Sy was an utter beast and as he tilted his hips and his dick hit just the right spot, your eyes rolled back in their sockets and your jaw hung open, the pleasure running through your veins turning your brain to jelly and all you could comprehend was Sy fucking the living daylights out of you. 
Starting to tremble, your sighs became squeaks which became screams of his name as you started to cum and it kept going, your body squeezing him tighter than a vice before he finally came with a beastly roar, shooting ropes of his creamy seed and coating velvet walls. 
The pair of you slumped down onto the bed, your bodies still joined as he pressed kisses to the back of your neck. Finally he pulled out and you whimpered at the loss of his warmth and weight on top of you, instinctively rolling and curling up against his side as you rested your head on his chest, the song of his heartbeat strong and steady beneath your ear;
“Fuck… that was amazing”
He gently stroked one hand over your back;
“You can say that again Darlin’. Your pussy is like heaven… never had a cunt grip me so tight and be able to take me balls deep before...”
You smiled and let your eyes rest for a moment, before you felt him shift and the sound of a cork being pulled from a bottle disturbed your post orgasmic bliss. Looking up you saw him oof the cork out of his mouth before bringing the bottle of tequila to his lips and taking a large mouthful. Holding the bottle to you he grinned as you sat up and took it, following suit and still wincing at the burn as the expensive liquid slid down your throat. 
Just at that moment there was a massive crack of thunder outside and an immediate flash of light, before the electricity fizzled out, plunging you into darkness. You weren’t afraid of the dark but the suddenness of it made you squeal, Sy pulling you close;
“Shhh its ok Darlin’, this place gets its power knocked out all the time cos’ its up on the hill here. That’s why there’s candles in every room”
He deftly slid out of your grasp and you heard him fumbling around on the floor before he illuminated the room with his phone, and you watched as his silhouette made its way across the room and you heard the click of a lighter. Moments later the room had a pale glow from the candles that had sat on the side table, and as he carried one back to bed you saw that he was still hard;
“How are you…”
“Still up? Oh Darlin’ i can go eight or nine rounds before i droop”
“Eight or… nine…”
He flopped down onto the bed beside where you sat, his hands behind his head and a wide smile on his face;
“So, what do ya’ wanna do next?”
You laughed softly  before taking another sip of tequila, toying with the little hat that was attached to it before a sudden urge overtook your senses. With a look of amusement on his face Sy watched as you took the hat from the bottle and softly tied it to his dick, the hat standing proud on his tip;
“A perfect fit” he remarked, but before either of you could say anything else a knock at the door interrupted you.
“Babe?” a quiet voice came from the other side of the door; “You in there?”
Your heart sank;
“Its my ex… I’m gonna go tell him to fuck off…”
Sy caught your arm gently, a grin on his face;
“Let me”
What happened next was something you could only have dreamt of, and as you pulled a pillow in front of you to hide your nakedness, Sy basked in his own naked glory as he strode to the door and pulled it open;
“Yes?”
Your ex stood in the hallway outside your room, his bags at his feet;
“What are you…?”
“I’m busy keeping my girl happy. What’re you doing here?”
“I got dumped…”
“Well champ, that sounds like a you problem…”
Without another word Sy stepped back and shut the door, making sure to flip the security lock extra hard so that your ex could hear it from the hallway. Striding back to the bed you couldn’t help but to laugh;
“I can’t believe you answered the door completely naked, hard, and with a mini sombrero on your dick!”
Climbing onto the bed he lay on his back, his hands behind his head as he grinned at you, wriggling his hips so his hard dick swayed to and fro with the hat still attached;
“Oh i think it made the moment all that more memorable Darlin’”
“He’ll certainly remember it, that’s for sure”
You carefully took the little adornment off of Sy, tossing it aside as you straddled his hips and grasped his hot shaft, helping to find your waiting entrance before sinking down onto him. 
The feeling of taking him inch by inch was almost overwhelming; thick and gnarled, his fat dick stretched you in every direction, and you were thankful for the added lubrication of his cum already dripping out of you.
As you started to ride him you could feel your body already deceiving you and climbing towards a rapid orgasm, and you found yourself cupping your breasts and twisting your nipples to distract yourself and let it last just a little longer. However when Sy’s massive hands rested on your hips and he started to thrust up into you, it was the beginning of the end. The final straw was when he slid one hand to your front, his thumb finding your clit and rubbing quick circles firmly against the engorged bud did it send you over the edge and you were coming again, back arched and head thrown back as your bodies moved as one in the candlelight.
-
Sy fucked you until the storm cleared and the candles fizzled out, just the moonlight illuminating your room when you both crawled under the duvet and fell asleep, sweaty bodies cooling in the night, sated from your energetic lovemaking.
Come morning and you were woken up by a series of featherlight kisses to your naked back and shoulders. For the briefest moment panic set in, but then you remembered your bed companion from the night before;
“Mmm Mornin’ Darlin’” he drawled, his voice low and coarse from sleep.
Turning you smiled at him before his lips caught yours for a gentle kiss. What followed was the best oral you’d ever received, followed by a steamy session of shower sex where for the first time in your life you’d felt confident that your partner was strong enough to not let you slip and injure yourself. 
The following room service breakfast had been thoroughly enjoyable where the two of you had talked and laughed, swapped numbers and both made it clear you’d like to see the other again. Sy had even driven you back to the train station, where you’d attracted the odd few stares as he’d kissed you with tongues and teeth before giving your ass a squeeze. 
-
Two weeks later.
Sy fiddled with the zippered pocket on his fatigues as he waited nervously outside the meeting room at the corporate offices. After what had seemed like an amazing night with you, he’d arrived at work on Monday to discover one of his boot camp cadets had made a formal complaint about his ‘lewd behaviour’. He knew it wasn’t you, but it had distracted him from the string of text’s you’d shared in the following days. He was thankful that you’d told him not to apologise, having started your new job and that was full on from the word go.
The door to the meeting room opened and his name was called, standing he smoothed his shirt down and nodded before entering the room. This was probably the most nervous he’d been since leaving the army; at least there if you fucked up you got a court marshall, now he was a civilian if he lost his job it meant he couldn’t pay his bills.
-
You were attempting to get a file out of the huge stack that sat on your desk without knocking your coffee over when your office door opened and a friendly face peered around the corner;
“Hey, you ready for the disciplinary hearing?”
“The what?... Oh, right… let me find the file…”
“Did you read it?”
Shaking your head you grinned at the manager of offsite contractors;
“Don’t worry, i’ve skimmed it. You guys brought me in to sort through this mess my predecessor left behind, I just wasn’t expecting it to be this much of a mess…”
Grabbing your coffee and the file with that day's date on, you followed your colleague through the building, attempting to scan over the complaint, frowning when you saw that the printer been running out of toner and had omitted the two parties names. Nevermind, you could always write those in.
Chewing on your pen as you shut the meeting room door, you quickly took a seat at the end of the table, looking up and only then your eyes going wide. On one side sat your ex, and someone that looked like a low rate lawyer judging by the cheap suit and even cheaper briefcase. On the other side sat Sy - Captain Syverson - whose eyes were as big as saucers and you saw the slightest hint of a smile start to tug at the corner of his mouth before he restored his poker face.
The manager introduced himself and then you;
“This is our new Human Resources manager, she’ll be overseeing this meeting”
Taking one last look at your report you took a sip of your drink before standing, keeping your face neutral;
“So, your client alleges that our employee acted in a lewd manner whilst on a team building exercise two weeks ago?”
“That is right Miss, you see…”
“And that your client wishes to pursue a lawsuit based on ‘emotional distress’ and that our employee caused the breakdown of his relationship”
“Yes Miss, Its like this you see…”
Cutting the lawyer off again, you looked pointedly at your ex;
“So, did you or did you not actually end the relationship with your partner, before even meeting Captain Syverson? Actually there’s no need to answer, i have a transcript of the text messages here…” you looked down at your your file, although you knew the texts by heart; “And i quote “I’ve found someone new, someone prettier than you, she’s better in bed too”
You looked up at your ex who was now sinking down into his chair;
“And by lewd behaviour, did you or did you not approach your ex’s bedroom at the hotel in the middle of the night, and continue to knock on her bedroom door whilst there was a ‘do not disturb’ sign on the door?”
The lawyer attempted to talk, but yet again you cut him off;
“So therefore, you had no emotional or romantic relationship with the person whose room it was, and therefore as fully consenting adults, our employee and your ex, were perfectly within their rights to start a romantic relationship, were they not?” you took a deep breath; “And, as you have a history of making civil lawsuits against companies that you have deemed you ‘wrong’, this frivolous attempt at extortion has now been recorded, and will be submitted to the authorities”
You lifted your phone before setting it back down onto the table. You hadn’t been recording, but it was enough for your ex’s lawyer to stand and leave the room quickly, your ex scurrying close behind. Leaning to the manager you cleared your throat;
“You might want to make sure security escorts them completely offsite”
“Absolutely. Can i leave you debrief Syverson?”
“Leave it with me”
You shut the door behind him as he left, and felt the warmth of Sy’s body behind you;
“This is a very unexpected, but oh so pleasant surprise”
Turning in his arms you were thankful that there were no internal windows to this meeting room, kissing him deeply before the giant bear of a man pulled away and smiled softly at you;
“I need to buy you dinner for what you did… you’re fucking badass”
“How did you not know what the meeting was about?”
“They just told me it was ‘lewd behaviour’. I’d been wracking my mind for the last week to figure out what i may have said or done… yeah i yell at people for a living, but i’m never lewd…”
Placing your palm on his cheek you smiled at him;
“Dinner sounds good by the way”
“Come over to my place tonight, i’ll cook you dinner”
“Will there be dessert?”
Sy licked his lips, his gaze travelling down your body and back up again;
“There definitely will be for me… i’m sure i’ve got some cookies you can have too Darlin”
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bakugohoex · 3 years
Note
I honestly can't remember if I asked for #7 with Zeke...but seeing the prompt and the blurb I must ask you please do fluff #7 with Zeke. 😭💗
“you, you’re fucking home to me, okay?”
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pairing: zeke yeager x female reader
cw: language, fluff, kissing, slight crying
word count: 1500+
a/n: i never realised how hard it was to write for zeke, anyway thank you to the person who resent the ask, means a lot after tumblr became a dick
summary: in which after an argument with zeke regarding his excessive jealousy and protectiveness over you, he finally reveals his true motives
1k event masterlist
↞ back to attack on titan masterlist
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The breath of hot ashy smoke hit the air, the stray cigarette across his two fingers as he let his hand fall to his side. He watched carefully, every movement you made speaking to Reiner and Porco with the same look of admiration you had given to him hours prior. He took another drag of his cigarette, putting it out on the balcony as he went to get you away from the two blonds.
“Y/n.” His voice was filled with power and authority, he disregarded the two boys looking at you. “With me.”
It was almost a beckoning as if you were some servant girl ready for his command and will. “I’ll see you both.” You waved goodbye to the two men following the other blond, he grasped your wrist almost dragging you away. “Zeke, woah, calm down.” His grip tightened against your wrist before pushing you into his office.
He let go of your wrist watching at how you rubbed the sore feeling, “have fun?” He questioned leaning against his desk, he eyed you up and down, the military uniform around your body, with the band around your left arm. He waited for a response as you gave a confused look.
“What are you on about now, Zeke?” You muttered crossing your arms.
He repeated, “did you have fun with them?”
“Why do you care?” You glared at his overprotectiveness; it had become a common occurrence for him to call you away whenever you were around the two other blonds, but it had become excessive.
Zeke leant against the bookshelf, staring at you as he brought out another cigarette. Bringing it to his lips and lightning it right in front of you, he took a long drag, watching as the smoke hit the rest of the room.
The first time you had met Zeke had been when the two of you were teenagers, at the tender age of 18, Zeke had already gained the beast titan and you had joined the military for other reasons. A friendship had occurred from the boy who would sneak out of meetings for a cigarette and the girl who had her breaks conveniently when meetings occurred.
“Want one?” His tender baby face had made you swoon, he was perfect in every way, to the way he spoke, to the way he held the cigarette. You shrugged, stopping and sitting beside the boy. He passed the cigarette that had been in his mouth, lightening it in yours as you took a drag, “first time?”
“Was it that obvious?” You laugh holding it between your two fingers.
He gives a chuckle, staring at you taking another drag, “I have a sixth sense, that tells me when pretty girls have been tainted.”
“So what? I wasn't trained before.” You ask.
“I guess, it means that I tainted you now.” He smirked before hearing the shout of a man calling for him. “That’s me, nice to meet you…”
“Y/n Y/l/n.” You answered his pause.
He smiled happily, having been walking backwards to still face you, “nice to meet you Y/n Y/l/n.”
“Wait? What’s your name?” You shouted as he continued to tread backwards not wanting to be shouted at anymore by a superior.
“Zeke Yeager, you better not go forgetting it, sweetheart.” You rolled your eyes chuckling at how the officer began berating the boy who gave a shrug, waving a goodbye at you.
It may have been your first encounter with the boy, but over the years of meeting the other Warriors. The knowledge of Paradis and Zeke’s past, you knew it all and he had gotten protective of the girl he had known for almost a decade now. Maybe it was love out of jealousy which seemed to be the obvious reason between your friends, or maybe he just didn't want anybody stealing you away. You didn’t know and didn’t care, waiting for his reply from your question after another overprotective action.
“They aren’t good for you.”
“Bullshit Zeke, tell me why you act like this now?” You tried to have authority, tried to bring about the same power he brought out, but at the sound of your dominance he laughed.
“Come on, doll, you’re gonna have to try harder to get it out of me, than that.” He took another long drag watching your lip twitch in anger. The feeling of riling you up intoxicated him, how could he not fall in love with that look of anger.
“Don’t be an ass.” You remarked back, walking up to the man and taking the cigarette from his mouth. Taking a long drag yourself as you blow the smoke to the side, you could taste his saliva already around the cigarette, but as you popped it back in his mouth. You felt your anger go down a bit.
He couldn't lie and say he wasn't turned on by your actions, the way you were so close to him yet seemed so far from him. “If you’re not going to give me an answer, I promised Reiner I’d help him with something.”
Just as you were about to leave the room, he grabbed your wrist once more, his grip soft and loose. If you tried, you’d be able to easily get out of it, but you stood faced away from him. Waiting for his next action, “you’re so fucking dense.”
“Me? Dense?” You repeated, “maybe if you didn’t try to hide your feelings through stupid remarks and commands, we wouldn’t be in this situation.”
Zeke was taken aback by how easily you countered in, but he wasn’t letting himself lose to you, “I don’t fucking do that, you’re just stupid.”
“You do realise everybody knows that you’re a jealous prick, that every time you call me it's when I'm around another guy, way to be a subtle asshole.” He had let go of your wrist as you seethed at him in anger.
“I don’t get jealous, who have I got to be jealous of? It's not like every time I see you with a guy, I think you’re going to leave me, you mean nothing to me.” He shouted back, taking another long drag of his cigarette.
You contemplated his words, thinking of what he had just said, “I mean nothing to you?”
Zeke acknowledged his words, staring at you, your lip quivering at his words. “Y/n, wait, I didn’t…” Before he could continue you faced him with a look of sadness.
“If I mean nothing to you, leave me alone.” You were about to leave again; this time Zeke had finally given up on hiding his feelings for you. How could he not love you; how could he not care for someone like you.
In an instant he pushed the door back, his arms on your sides as you faced him. Tears welling up, he moved his thumb to caress your cheek, wiping away your tears, “I’m sorry, I do care about you.”
You don’t speak, not bothering to face him, his ashy breath hits your cheek, waiting for him to continue, “I shouldn’t have said that I like you, I love you even, in all these years, it’s always been you.”
He moves your face to meet his own, his face only a mere inch from you. He had confessed his love so easily, but your silence and lack of tears gave mixed signals. “Me?” Was all you could stifle out.
“You, you’re fucking home to me, okay?” He whispered his mouth lingering just across your own.
“Okay.” You answered, feeling his other hand lean against the door whilst the one caressing your cheek moved to cup your face allowing your lips to touch.
His lips meshed between your own, ask still lingering between both your mouths, you didn't care though. His soft grip on your cheek contrasted the kiss, the sloppy tongue actions, your hands in his blonde hair, the feeling of his beard rub against your skin as he kept on kissing you. He pushed you up against the wall, the gap between your bodies becoming non-existent. His tongue lingered in your mouth as you both went to part, biting your bottom lip to hear your soft moans again. He never expected to have confessed so easily to you and have you in this position.
His body almost crushing you onto the wall, your legs in between his own. He stared at you with his piercing grey eyes meeting your own, it pooled with love and comfort. “I love you too Zeke.”
He gave a soft kiss to your forehead, staying in the position for a while. Waiting for you both to catch your breath and acknowledge that you two could have something with his remaining years.
You saw the clock to the side, a worry erupting from your face, “fuck, I have a meeting with Porco.”
Zeke remained encasing you, disregarding your words, “I think you’ve forgotten who you belong to, doll.”
“Maybe you should tell me again.” You flirted back as you both went in for another kiss.
It had been much softer, with Zeke’s hand moving to your side, holding you in place as he almost smiled through the kiss. “All mine.” He spoke through it giving you another soft kiss afterwards, you were finally all his.
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chuckbass-love · 3 years
Note
56 and 100 with andy or steve plss
Hellooo lovely. First of all thank you for the request and i’m sorry for the long wait. I was taking a break from requests to work on the multiple series that i’ve got going on but i’m back now and i hope this is worth the wait. Secondly, i chose Andy for this and i really hope you love it.
Prompt #100: “Call me selfish, but i don’t ever want anyone else to touch you”
Prompt #56: “Come sit on my face, let me show you how much i missed you”
Disclaimer: My work is not to be translated or to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.
Pairing: Andy Barber x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Jealousy, fluff, smut, oral sex ( f receiving), language and ass grabbing. 18+ guys
Word Count: 2,861
GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @lovingpostit go check them out💜
I’ll Show You
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It’s been one hell of a day at work today and all you want now is just to cuddle up on the couch next to Andy, a glass of wine in hand and some random movie that he’s been dying to watch all week on the TV. To tell the truth you don’t even care what movie it is, all that matters is that he’s next to you, holding your body close to his with his cologne filling up your senses and intoxicating you. Oh and lots of kisses are also a must.
You could honestly spend forever in his company and it’s been that way since you first met, you’ve always been drawn to each other like magnets, to put it in the most cliche way possible. But it suits the two of you because you’re both introverted and home bodies. So any time you get where you can just sit together and enjoy each others company, you take it no questions asked.
This week has surprisingly dragged, probably due to all of the clients you’ve had. Your calendar has quite literally been chock a block full not to mention the severity of the things your clients unload onto you. It’s been tough. But you got into this business because you can’t help but help people and you knew the second you started on your journey to becoming a therapist that it was never going to be easy. Nothing good ever comes easy. But you don’t mind that, you’ve never shied away from a challenge before and your brains are just another thing added onto a long list that Andy keeps of why he fell in love with you.
That along with your heart of gold.
On the drive home you decide to turn the radio volume up a little more than usual, you need something to keep you going until you can run into the arms of your love and as Led Zeppelin comes onto the radio, you know you picked the right day to crank the volume up. What a band.
----------------------
Andy is just making his way out of his own office and down to the parking lot to drive home himself. He’s usually home before you but tonight he had to clear up a couple things before he got to leave and much like your career, his is also never stress free, but he loves it too much to give it up.
As you park your car you notice Andy’s isn’t here yet which isn’t unusual, you know he’s most likely had to stay behind a little later so you decide that you’ll be the one to start cooking dinner ready for when he arrives. You step out of your car and head to the back seat to retrieve your bag along with your jacket from this morning before strutting up to your front door. But before you can even put the key in the lock, your neighbour Ian jogs over, calling your name to catch your attention.
“Ian, hi” you beam, greeting him with a friendly smile, one which he returns gladly.
“Y/N, me and Julie were just talking and since i’m taking the boys out golfing tomorrow, she’ll have a spare coupon for the spa, if you’re interested in joining her”
You have been rather tense lately and since it’s Saturday tomorrow, you’re not gonna pass up such a wonderful opportunity to relieve the tension building and the knots forming all over your back.
“Sure, that would be great. What time?”
“11” he responds simply and you nod your head rather enthusiastically.
He places his hand on yours as he smiles from ear to ear “brilliant, she’ll be over at half ten then just to be safe. Have a nice evening” and with that he walks away just as Andy is walking towards you with a not so cheery look on his face. Must have been a tough day at work for him too.
“Hi handsome, what’s with the pouty face?” you tease as you let the two of you into your shared house but he doesn’t seem to be laughing at your not so funny joke.
“Andy?” you press him for some kind of response even if it’s a nod or mumbling, you’d rather something than to be blanked by him but to no avail.
He just shrugs his coat off, hooking it onto the coat rack before slipping his shoes off and placing them in the shoe holder. And since he doesn’t seem to be responding any time soon, you do the same before padding into the kitchen to have a look at what you have in the refrigerator and the cupboards to cook for dinner. You eventually settle on a simple dish, mac n cheese. It doesn’t take too long to cook and that’s exactly what you need seeing as you’re starving.
You take one of the many pots and pour some water in it before setting it on the stove on a medium heat to boil whilst you change into something a little comfier.
As soon as you enter your shared bedroom you see Andy making his way into the closet too and when you walk in he turns his head to see you staring right back at him, confusion all over your face.
“What’s wrong?” you ask, hoping that this time he might actually tell you rather than acting like you didn’t open your mouth “what did Ian want?” is all he says and it’s all he needs to say for you to know just why he’s acting off with you.
Ian and Julie have lived opposite you ever since you moved in and you automatically got along, all four of you. They’d get a babysitter for their children and you’d double date every now and then but those fun times were interrupted when Andy insisted that Ian had a thing for you. Although you tried to convince him that it wasn’t true and he was just paranoid, you couldn’t help but notice the evidence too. The way Ian would look at you and hold his stare a little too long, the way he’d flirt without you realising it at the time and obviously today, the way he had his hand on yours. Andy must have taken one look at that and assumed the worst.
“He asked if i’d go to the spa tomorrow with Julie, i said yes, why?” you have to be sure though, although you’re assuming now, you want him to be able to tell you what’s got him so bitter.
“I don’t trust him” he mutters as he finishes changing into some sweatpants and a sweatshirt.
“He’s harmless Andy”
“I saw the way he was with you just now, touching you and giving you that shit eating grin, he knew what he was doing”
“Andy, whatever he thinks of me, i don’t care. I’m with you for a reason, can you just trust me”
“It’s not that i don’t trust you” he snaps
“Except it seems that way”
You hold off on changing for now, deciding that storming off childishly is the better option. Once you’re back downstairs you then place the pasta into the now boiling water, making sure to turn the heat up one more too.
“Why can’t you just see things from my perspective here?” he wonders out loud as he leans on the kitchen counter, catching your attention. The way his hands are in his pockets and his shoulders are hunched over, it makes you feel bad for even getting mad at him. Sure jealousy isn’t great but when he gets so worried about other men stealing you away you can’t help but realise just how much he loves you. He loves you so much that the thought of you leaving breaks him let alone if you were to actually go.
But he doesn’t have to worry about that and you’ve told him plenty of times.
“It’s not that i don’t see things from your perspective, it’s the fact that there’s no telling you. I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than be without you yet you’re too caught up with Ian having a little crush to notice that”
“Yeah well call me selfish Y/N, but i don’t ever want anyone else to touch you let alone flirt”
Instead of fighting back against him you step closer and wrap your arms around him as you stand on your tip toes and just as your lips touch his, his hands grip your face gently.
His grip tightens the more you kiss him and when you slip your tongue in, he loses all control. His hands dance all over your body, leaving no spot untouched. Goosebumps form all over as the kiss heats up, the pasta long forgotten on the stove as you’re too busy being ravished by your man.
“Someone’s very possessive” you mock, smirking a little into the kiss before he kisses you so hard it knocks the air from your lungs and when you pull away you’re gasping.
Your breathing hitches as he rests his forehead to yours, his handsome face inches away from yours and all you want to do is just claim his lips, just like you did seconds before. You can’t get enough of him.
However, he beats you to it, gripping your chin aggressively as he bites down on your bottom lip with need. You pull him closer by wrapping your arms around his neck loosely to which he happily obliges.
“Is that a problem?” he asks, raising his brows at you as you struggle to regain control of your breathing, you simply shake your head no in response, half expecting it to end here. But he has other plans.
“Good” he starts, slowly walking into the lounge leaving you stood there confused. So you decide to follow, only to find him laying down on the couch with his eyes trained on you.
“Now, why don’t you come sit on my face, let me show you how much i missed you today”
Your heart skips a beat as you watch him smile afterwards, you can’t quite believe that he’s all yours.
Without another second left to pass, you head over to him and begin to straddle his waist. He quickly takes control, moving you further up until you’re hovering above his chest.
Large calloused hands grip the hem of your skirt, slowly pushing it up to expose your laced black panties. Andy can’t help but choke on air as he sets his eyes on your panty clad mound. But rather than waste time, he starts to devour you over the lace before eventually slipping them to the side and feasting on you like a man starved.
The sensation causes you to throw your head back and practically scream due to how good it feels. His tongue on you like this will never get old, it’ll always be one of the best things in life, one that you’ll continue to enjoy for many years to come. The way his skilful tongue glides over your puffy folds with such precision before he eventually latches on to your bundle of nerves, it’s almost too much to bare and you can feel the coil tightening already with every suck and lick.
And when he slurps on you as he drinks the juices that pour from your fountain you’re unable to stop your hips from moving on their own accord and before you know it, you’re grinding yourself on him desperately as he lays there taking it like the greedy man he’s always going to be for you.
For him, you’re it. You’re the one and you always have been since he first met you.
After Laurie he didn’t expect to ever want another woman again until you came along. You rocked his world, turned it upside down and since then, he’s been hooked. He’s obsessed with the taste of you, the smell of you, the sight of you and the sound of you. You ignite a fire within him, alert all of his senses and turn his whole body into gooseflesh. Just the way he loves.
He flickers his eyelashes before looking up at you as his hands make their way to your perfectly shaped ass so that he can dig his claws into the soft skin of your round globes, causing you to keen for more.
The sounds your making should have alerted the neighbours by now but even if they do, Andy doesn’t care. He just loves the music you make as you arch your back, still riding his tongue as he pushes it further into your tight and wet hole.
“Please, Andy” you cry out, reaching down to run your fingers through his fluffy hair, you’re desperate now, even more so.
“Hm?” he mumbles, the noise vibrating onto your pussy “i’m gonna cum” you breathe out heavily, trying to gain control over the situation but failing miserably. 
Andy rests his hands on your hips, stilling the movements before diving back in for more. He swirls his tongue around your folds once again before ultimately settling his plump lips around your pulsating clit and sucking like his life depends on it.
You can’t hold back anymore, the sinful moans are enough to make him cum too without you even so much as touching him.
And with one final suck and two of his fingers massaging your folds, you cum with a frantic sob. Your body launches forward and he pulls you down so that you’re laying on top of him.
He strokes your back delicately, soothing your shaking body. He can feel your legs jolting every couple of seconds.
Eventually you get off of him and attempt to stand up but of course, you fail miserably.
“So, how was that?” he rasps, chuckling simultaneously
“Perfect, oh and i missed you too today” you smile and he eventually stands up as you slouch down.
“Good, now just let me finish the job then we can order takeout” he says, causing you to furrow your brows but the unasked questions have their answer once he gets on his knees on the floor between your legs and dives right back in.
You shiver a little, your pussy is still trying to recover but he just can’t get enough. His tongue laps at the cum still spilling out of you, making sure that every last drop is inside of his mouth before swallowing it all.
“Now i’m done” he quips and you sit up a little, pulling him closer to you so you can get a taste of yourself on his tongue. Once he slips it into your mouth you can’t help but get carried away, until the door knocks, disturbing you from your peaceful and romantic moment.
You stand up to go and answer it, quickly sorting out your appearance in the hallway mirror before you open it. It’s Ian.
“Ian, hi... again” you giggle nervously as you turn to see Andy’s face change from content to angry in seconds. He practically jumps up off the couch to join you at the door, his beard still damp with your arousal.
You watch as Andy stares the poor man down before wiping at his face.
“I was just stopping by to let you know that Julie wants to leave at 10 instead, you know because of traffic and all” you can practically smell anxiety on him and Andy notices it too.
“Sure, that works for me” you say before the situation turns awkward.
You glance over at Andy who is just stood there watching him intently but he’s coming off rather intimidating.
“Anyway, we’re about to order takeout Ian so we have to go” Andy adds in before snaking his arm around you waist and pulling you closer to him, you follow Ians eyes as he looks down at your skirt and you can only hope Andy didn’t spot that but judging by the change in his breathing, he did.
Shortly after Andy bids Ian goodbye and as he’s walking off, you’re still in the doorway.
You turn to your jealous boyfriend and tut, resting your hands on your hips but he soon disbands your serious facial expression as he smacks your bum which causes you to squeal.
“Andy”
“Let’s get you to bed so i can really show you how much i missed you” he kicks the door shut as he picks you up to carry you to your shared bedroom and you just know you have a long night ahead of you.
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fleetingpieces · 3 years
Text
My One in a Million CH 7
Y’all, this chapter got so out of hand and it’s so lOnG (or at least longer than any other chapter I posted) Thank you so so much @inloveoknutzy @knittingdreams @heyitssmiller and @donttouchmycarrots !! You all helped with this chapter in different ways and I appreciate you all so much❤️❤️
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@whataboutmyfries  @justdyingontheinside @heyoitslysso @sunflowerfox87 @hereforwolfstarr @potterlocked24-7 @cheekeebabe (i can’t seem to find your tumblr :( ) @domesticatedbeetlenamedjorge
CW: mentions of past animal abuse, emergency clinic, mention of needles
Masterlist
Ao3
Chapter 7 - Rough night
“Go home, son.”
Remus lifted his head from where it’d been buried in his hands for who knows how long and looked at the doctor smiling sadly at him.
It was well past any reasonable time, he’d probably been sitting there for hours, but Remus couldn't bring himself to move from his spot in the waiting room.
He didn't want to go.
He couldn't stand the idea of going back home alone, of Cocoa not being there with him. He felt as if he wasn't really there at the clinic, his mind was miles away in a deserted, foggy forest, where a furry little puppy was chained to a tree, barely keeping his eyes open, his ribs protruding like a black skeleton. How could he just go?
The feel of Cocoa’s body trembling with spasms in his arms as he’d carried him to the car was still fresh in his mind; how he’d whined pitifully from the back seat while Remus sped through the city until he reached the emergency clinic, how both their hearts had been beating a thousand miles per minute when he picked him up again and burst through the front doors.
The fear clutching at his heart had made him numb to anything else going on around him, to the way he’d practically screamed at the poor guy at the reception desk until someone came to help him. And even though he knew it was exactly what he’d come here for, parting from Cocoa and watching as they took him away had almost broken Remus all over again.
He would give anything to feel that heartbeat under his palm right then.
A hand settled heavily on his shoulder, grounding him back into his body. Remus didn't want to listen to those words again. Go. It sounded a lot like he was abandoning him.
"You need to rest. And Cocoa needs to stay in observation, but I promise we will take good care of him. You can come back tomorrow afternoon, he’ll probably be ready to go home by then."
Resigned, Remus nodded. He knew he couldn't stay and that Cocoa was in good hands, but that did nothing to quell his guilt.
He thanked the doctor, who squeezed his shoulder once, and walked numbly out the building.
The next half hour was a blur. Remus had no idea how he got back to his apartment building, he only had vague memories of getting back into his car and driving through the mostly empty streets.
All he knew was that he was now there, standing in front of his door, staring at the pattern in the wood without really seeing it, picturing the empty flat that was awaiting for him on the other side instead. Remus counted to ten and sighed. He figured it wouldn’t get easier any time soon, so he fished in his pocket for his keys.
Only to realise he didn’t have them.
He stared at his empty pocket as he replayed in his head how he’d dropped the keys to the floor when he’d gotten home earlier that day, and in his haste to get Cocoa checked, he hadn’t grabbed anything other than the car keys.
“Fucking fuck, just...fuck!” he slammed his fist against the door once, like that was going to solve anything.
Suddenly he felt exhausted. He’d been through way too many emotions in just one day and all he wanted to do was lie in bed, but he couldn’t do that ‘cause he was fucking locked out. Remus let his back hit the wall and slid down to the floor, hiding his head in his knees. Despite everything, part of him was kinda glad that he didn’t have to go in when he knew there would be no one there expecting him.
He’d left him at the clinic. Alone. Probably inside a tiny cage, with no one there to comfort him and those horrible intravenous lines piercing his skin. Remus knew first hand how uncomfortable those were.
His eyes burned as tears started prickling behind his eyelids and dampened the fabric of his shorts. It was his fault. Two years ago he’d promised he would take care of Cocoa, make sure he was happy, and look how that turned out.
“Remus?”
Oh, fuck. Remus tightened his grip on his knees as he heard fast footsteps approaching.
“Remus, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?”
The rustle of a bag thumping against the floor close by was the only warning he got before he felt someone kneeling next to him, but Remus refused to look up. What the hell was he doing out at this time? Remus was not sure he could deal with this right now. Not with the tornado that was Sirius Black.
He could feel the other man shuffling about, most likely not sure what to do, until he finally said softly, “Remus, please look at me?”
There was such a plea in his voice, and a level of concern he hadn’t expected. Remus knew he couldn’t stay this way forever, so he reluctantly raised his head, doing his best to dry his face on his clothes as he did. He just hoped his eyes didn't look as bloodshot as they felt.
Sirius' eyebrows were furrowed, worry written all over his face as he knelt there, his hands half-raised like he wanted to touch Remus but wasn’t sure if he was allowed to.
“What happened?” he asked quietly.
Remus stared into silver eyes, trying his damn best to school his features into a mask of impassiveness. “I...I forgot my keys.”
“Ok…” Sirius eyed him wearily. “Do you have any spares?”
“Leo does, but I can’t ask him to bring them now,” Remus shrugged.
“So what, you were just going to sit here all night?”
Remus didn’t reply. He just shrugged again, his gaze glazing over and drifting to the wall in front of him. He wasn’t sure he had many options, and his brain wasn’t cooperating to come up with a solution. Maybe he could force the door open. But then he would have to pay for the damages, and he might not be able to close the door again and leave it broken for the night.
A sigh brought him out from his unhelpful thoughts. “Why don’t you come to my place?”
“What?” his eyes snapped back to Sirius, who quirked an eyebrow at him.
“You can’t possibly spend the night here Remus. For one, it’s freezing cold and you’re only in your gym clothes. And for another, I won’t allow it.”
It did seem like a very reasonable option, but then Remus noticed just how close Sirius was from him, his warmth radiating from his body and warming Remus’ numb fingers. Suddenly, all he could think of was how he’d almost kissed this man just a couple of hours ago. What if Sirius was only asking because of that? Was he purposely trying to get Remus alone?
“Ah, thank you, but I can go to my Mum’s or...or I could sleep in my car.”
“Remus don’t be stupid. It’s the middle of the night. Your Mum lives far away and she’s probably sleeping right now, and seriously? What the hell are you thinking? Sleeping in your car? No fucking way, that’s dangerous, and I have Netflix, ice cream, and a perfectly good guest room just three feet away.”
Remus hesitated. Even if he felt more comfortable knowing there was a guest room available, he still wasn’t sure he could face Sirius and whatever had happened in that pool. Wouldn’t it be awkward?
But Sirius did have a point, he couldn’t go back home. And though he was reluctant to admit it, he didn’t want to be alone right now and Sirius’ voice was strangely calming.
“Are you sure?” Remus asked, biting his lip.
“Of course.” Sirius smiled and got up, picking up the bag that he’d dropped on the floor. It was from the shop down the corner, full of snacks and a pack of cigarettes as far as Remus could tell. He offered Remus a hand and helped him get up, then led the way to his flat without another word.
Remus followed numbly, using what was left of his strength to lift his feet enough not to drag them over the floor. Once inside, he glanced idly around, noticing a few more details now that there were no people partying everywhere. There was a weird mix of decor going on: some of the stuff was tastefully modern (and very expensive), while other things were the kind of trinkets you would most likely find at a thrift store or in a street market. A Queen flag hung from the same wall as a street sign that had clearly been stolen, right next to a huge telescope that looked out the window.
“Make yourself at home,” Sirius said over his shoulder as he went over to the kitchen.
Doors closing and the sound of ceramic clinking came from the place Sirius had disappeared to. Remus moved in autopilot to sit at the couch and glanced down at his hands. His brain felt like mush, his mind going completely blank while he waited.
He didn’t move an inch until Sirius came back a few minutes later, holding a steaming cup of tea that he offered Remus. It took him a couple of seconds to figure out how to move his arm again, and when he did, it was trembling so badly that he wasn’t sure he’d be able to hold the cup without spilling tea everywhere. He hoped Sirius wouldn’t notice, but by the way he frowned, he had no such luck.
Indeed, Sirius placed the mug on the coffee table before Remus could get a hold of it and sat down in front of him. He then reached slowly to clasp Remus’ hand in both of his.
“Jesus fuck Remus, you’re fucking freezing. Just how long were you sitting out there?” he asked in a reproachful tone.
Remus simply shrugged. He had no idea, and besides, he was too focused on Sirius’ big hands around his. He knew he probably shouldn’t, that the other man probably didn’t even mean it in that way, but he took comfort in that small touch, in how gently Sirius held him. It was as if he was scared Remus would break, or disappear in a cloud of smoke. He vaguely wondered if Sirius realised how long it’d been since Remus was touched like this.
When he spoke next, Sirius’ voice was softer. “Ok, this is what we’re going to do. You’re going to forget about that cup of tea, go take a hot shower and change into warmer clothes. Warming your fingertips and digestive tract is pointless if the rest of you is still freezing. And after that, we’ll get you sorted for the night. D’accord?”
A steaming shower sounded like bliss right then, especially now that Remus was painfully aware of how cold his shaking body was. Just accept it, he told himself, but all that came out of him was “I don’t have clothes to change into.”
His voice sounded dull even to his own ears, but Sirius kindly ignored it and waved a dismissive hand.
“I’ll lend you some. Now come on,” his tone didn’t leave room for arguing.
Remus was finding it harder and harder to look at his face, so he let his head drop. “I don’t want to be a bother.”
“Remus.”
Slowly, warm fingers extended towards him, touching lightly below his chin to make him look up. Sirius’ face was a wonderful mix of fierce and caring as he stared at him intently.
“You are not a bother. Ok? Not now, not ever.”
Remus’ throat closed up, and he didn’t trust his voice to sound steady, so he just nodded quickly. Sirius smiled reassuringly and brushed his fingers in a feather-like caress, and Remus found himself jutting his chin forward to prolong the touch, but, much too soon, Sirius let go and got up.
He guided Remus through a hall and into a spacious bathroom that had both a big bathtub and a shower cubicle. Sirius went straight to open the hot tap so the water would warm up, and then he reached into the cabinet under the sink, pulling out a soft looking white towel, which he placed on the counter. He turned to look at Remus.
“Toiletries are just in that corner, use whatever you need. I’ll just go get some clean clothes for you and be right back.” He smiled again and left.
With nothing else to do, Remus let his eyes wander around the room that was slowly filling with hot steam from the shower, until he looked on top of the sink and was startled at his own reflection in the mirror.
Damn, he was a fucking mess. His clothes were rumpled, his hair ruffled and dishevelled from all the times he’d raked a hand through it, and his eyes were red, puffy and a little bit dead.
“Here you go.” Sirius walked back in, carrying a pile of neatly folded clothes which he put next to the towel. “Call me if you need anything, d’accord? Take your time.”
Remus nodded and thanked him, not quite able to meet his eye. Sirius closed the door behind him and Remus took off his clothes and stepped in the shower. He hadn’t realised how taught his muscles were until the jet of hot water hit his back and he relaxed under the pressure. It was very soothing, standing there for a while, slowly working his body to loosen up, while thinking of everything that had happened that day and trying to calm down.
By the time he finished, he hadn’t succeeded completely, but felt a lot better all the same. He snagged the towel, draping it across himself, and went through the pile of clothes that Sirius had left for him, a warm feeling spreading through his chest.
The feeling extended to his cheeks when he picked up a small square of black fabric, only to realise it was a pair of Sirius’ underwear.
Oh God, was he really going to wear his neighbour’s underwear? His hot neighbour’s underwear? His hot neighbour whom he very much had wanted to pin against the pool tiles and kiss senseless?
He bristled and looked up at the ceiling. Well, it’s not like the air between them could get any more awkward, could it?
***
Sirius started tugging at his bottom lip for the ninth time since he’d sat at the sofa. Remus had been in the shower for a really long time and he was starting to get worried. He still felt slightly thrown off-kilter by the way he’d found the man sitting by the door, curled in a ball and hugging his legs as if his life depended on it.
And the despair in those amber eyes when he’d finally looked up at him… How the fuck was he supposed to ignore that? He never wanted to see that look in Remus’ eyes ever again.
He was just about to go over and knock on the door when he heard some shuffling, and his head perked up to see Remus walking into the room and stop by the archway awkwardly. Sirius tried to ignore how cute Remus looked in his sweats and hoodie that were two sizes too big for him. His wet curls were flopping over his forehead adorably, but damn, it was certainly not the time to be smitten by the man.
Remus was clutching his own clothes against his chest in a protective stance, like that could shield him from...Sirius had no idea what.
And that was exactly the problem, wasn’t it? This man was so open one minute and incredibly guarded the next; Sirius could tell he was desperately trying to protect himself from something. But he just didn’t know why.
He mustered up a smile, trying to make Remus feel more at ease, and approached him. “Hey there,” he eyed Remus’ face discreetly. He looked better, but still seemed to be a bit off and he held the bundle tighter when Sirius got close. “I can show you where the guestroom is if you want to lie down, and then I’ll make you another tea. I’m afraid I drank the other one while I waited. Both cold and warmed up tea should be a crime,” he said, trying to lighten up the mood. Anything to get Remus to drop some of his walls.
The corner of Remus’ mouth quirked up slightly, and, given the circumstances, Sirius took that as a success.
"Actually, I… I don't think I can sleep right now," Remus said, rubbing at the side of his neck.
"That's ok," Sirius reassured. "Do you want me to stay up with you? We can play games or watch a movie. Or would you rather I leave you alone?"
And then Remus had that look again, that seemed as though he was drowning, and Sirius prepared himself to be shut out without knowing why. But then again, Remus never seemed to do what he expected him to.
"I wouldn't mind some company, if that's ok," he said, before he hurried to add, "but don't feel like you have to."
Sirius smiled brightly at him. "My work schedule is fucked up anyway, so don't worry about it. Why don't you go sit on the couch? I'll get us something to drink."
While Remus nodded and sat down, Sirius went back into the kitchen and turned on the kettle. He was actually meant to be editing his last recording, even more now that he had more of a reason to do it.
He’d received Remus’ merch a few days ago, and had made a video using it for the sole purpose of imagining Remus’ face when he saw it on Padfoot’s channel. Usually, Marlene was in charge of doing the editing, but he’d asked her to let him do this one himself. He knew it was stupid, but even if Remus wouldn’t know, he wanted it to be something personal.
The eagerness to finish them tonight was almost consuming him; he was sure they would lift Remus’ spirits. But he couldn’t leave him alone right now.
The water boiled, Sirius filled two mugs with a nice aromatic tea, and, after a moment of hesitation, he grabbed a bottle of whiskey from the cupboard and walked back into the living room. 
Keeping a safe distance between them, he sat on the couch next to Remus, who raised an eyebrow when Sirius placed the bottle at the table. He simply shrugged in response.
"I thought you might want some."
Remus narrowed his eyes and held his cup in both hands, but after taking two sips he seemed to think better of it and reached over to pour himself a healthy dose. He sighed when he drank next and stared ahead, his eyes getting that faraway look again. Sirius wasn’t sure he wanted to know where exactly Remus was at that moment. 
He’d been wondering for a while as to what could have gotten Remus in this state. The man was usually so composed, except for those few moments Sirius had gotten a glimpse of, when he could practically see him closing up. He hated that feeling, hated not knowing how to help him or avoid those reactions.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked after a moment.
“About what?”
Sirius raised an eyebrow even though Remus was not looking at him. “You don’t seriously think I believed for a second that you were crying in the hallway because you forgot your keys, do you?”
Remus flinched but still kept his head down, avoiding his gaze, and a horrible thought occurred to him.
“I...I don’t want to assume anything,” he started, feeling a weight drop in his stomach, “but if this has anything to do with… you know, with what happened earlier then I…” he fumbled for the right words as he gestured vaguely with his hands, and finally Remus looked back with a confused expression on his face. He frowned for a second and then realisation dawned on him and he hurried to shake his head.
“No, no that’s not it. I...Something else happened and I had to leave my flat in a hurry. It’s...it’s not about that.”
His face turned to a lovely shade of pink, and Sirius had the sudden urge to cup those cheeks in his palms and feel the soft skin beneath them. He balled his hands into fists to keep himself from reaching out.
“Ok,” Sirius said, relieved but still worried. Remus seemed uncomfortable, and though Sirius had a million questions he was dying to ask, he knew it was not the time. Instead, he added some whiskey to his own tea. “Well, I’m here for you, in whichever way you need.”
Silence stretched between them, and it didn’t seem like Remus wanted to talk, so Sirius found a silly movie that could take Remus’ mind off things and they sat in companionable silence. They sipped from their spiked teas while the movie rolled, and when those were finished they moved on to straight whiskey.
He could tell Remus kept stealing glances at him, and even opened his mouth a couple times, but ended up closing it back in the end. He gave him the time he needed and waited.
“Sirius,” Remus called after a while. When Sirius glanced at him from his spot by the armrest, he found soft eyes, warm like melted caramel, trained on him. “Thank you.”
His voice was earnest and loaded with emotions that Sirius couldn’t figure out, but it sent a flutter through his stomach. He smiled fondly at this gorgeous, unpredictable man that had stumbled in his life at such a dark time. “Anytime, Rem.”
Remus' face turned almost pleading, and it was becoming physically impossible for Sirius not to get closer and pull him into his arms. Not when he was clearly upset about something and possibly a bit drunk.
No, he didn't want to do it like this.
He raked his brain for a safe topic and said the first thing that came to mind. "So, you said your classes were going well?"
Remus blinked a few times and then made a vague gesture with a hand, almost knocking the bottle in the process.
Well, he was definitely a bit drunk.
"It's great. Everyone is very nice and welcoming. And it's amazing that I got to know Lily and Natalie. Although Nat can be a bit hard to deal with," he said, but there was no real annoyance in his voice. In fact, he seemed rather fond of both girls.
Remus stretched forward to grab the bottle again, his mug tilting precariously on his leg. Sirius wasn't sure it was a good idea for him to keep drinking, so he snatched it right from his fingertips and placed both mugs on the table.
“Hey!” Remus protested.
“You're clearly ahead of me, I’m just catching up,” Sirius smiled mischievously as he gulped down, the warm liquid burning his throat, and laughed when Remus scowled at him. “Tu es mignon,” he said before he could stop himself.
Fuck. Maybe he should cut back on the alcohol too.
But Remus didn’t comment on it, just stared at Sirius with those big eyes that somehow were so much like his pet’s. And suddenly something clicked in his head.
“Oh crap. Will Cocoa be ok?” he asked Remus, who just stared. “Y’know, with you being locked out and all.” Remus continued to stare, his hand flinching the only indication that he’d heard him. Sirius raised an eyebrow and watched, alarmed, as tears started welling in Remus’ eyes. He fumbled around, flustered, wanting to hug Remus but not sure if Remus would want him to. “Ok, merde, don’t worry. Maybe I can climb over to your balcony? But I don’t think I can get in unless you left the window open…”
Remus sniffed. “My dog…”
“Fuck, wait here. Maybe I can open the door anyway, I’ll just go-” he was already stumbling out of his seat, but stopped when he felt Remus pulling at his sleeve.
“He’s not there.”
“Not there? What do you mean?”
“He-” Remus sniffed again and his breath hitched, “he’s at the clinic.”
Sirius sat down slowly, his heart beating fast. “What are you talking about?”
“I… I got back home and he… he’d found some of my chocolate, I don’t even know where he got it from.” Remus paused to take a shaky breath. Sirius could just imagine the moment, and Remus’ worry, and his heart ached for him. For both of them. “He was all… trembling and stuff. I took him to the emergency clinic straight away.”
“Is he going to be okay?” he asked as gently as he could.
“I think so. They gave him something to absorb the toxins, but he had to stay in observation just in case.”
“That’s good news, isn’t it?”
Remus’ tears started falling harder; great, heaving sobs shaking his body. He was a wreck, eyes swollen, wet tracks down his red cheeks, and Sirius couldn’t help it anymore. He took Remus’ hand, who held on as though that was the only thing keeping him together.
“But I left him alone at the hospital! When I found him chained to that tree, I promised I would take care of him, that I wouldn’t abandon him just like his old owners had. Just like I was ditched too. And I just left him there!”
Sirius started at that. What did he mean ‘he was ditched’? Every new detail about Remus’ past that came to light felt like having his vision go clearer and darker at the same time. Some questions were answered, but a lot more appeared that were worse than the ones before. He didn’t understand why Remus’ mum or Leo hadn’t been at the hospital with him, or exactly why he’d been stuck in bed in the first place. But he knew it was still hard on Remus. He could only imagine what leaving Cocoa at the clinic would have done to him.
“It’s my fault he ate the chocolate in the first place…”
“Oh no, we’re not going to do that. This is not your fault.”
“But he almost died,” he said, with his head bowed in shame.
Sirius scooted closer and held Remus’ tighter, while he used his free hand to wipe the other man’s tears with his thumb, first on one cheek and then the other. He pressed his palm against Remus’ cheek and locked eyes with him.
"Remus, the way you reacted is probably what saved his life. That dog loves you, anyone can tell, and I know you would never do anything that would hurt him. Cocoa is going to be fine."
Remus’ breath hitched again as he leant into the touch.
"How do you know?" he asked helplessly.
Sirius smiled softly at him. "’Cause he's a fighter just like you are."
It was small, but slowly, an actual, genuine smile spread across Remus’ face, looking at Sirius as if he was seeing him for the first time, and Sirius felt his world stop.
It didn’t feel like the sun was rising after the longest night. It was more like coming up for air after being underwater without even knowing it. It was melting every barrier he’d ever built. It was wishing he could see that smile every day, because if Remus smiled like that, then everything was a little bit better.
Before he could get his mind riled up about how deeply enthralled by the man he was and the panicking that would ensue, Remus yawned.
"C'mon, let's get you to bed."
Stretching his arms over his head, Sirius stood up and turned the TV off. Remus tried to follow but stumbled over his feet and would have crashed over the table if Sirius hadn't caught him in time, draping a hand around his middle.
"Oops," Remus chuckled, and Sirius inwardly winced at how adorable he was.
He put an arm under his shoulders and helped him to his room, not bothering to turn on the light. He opened the bed covers for him, and guided him down; Remus’ eyes were halfway closed even when he was still sitting, and Sirius had to force himself to turn around and leave, but just as he did, long fingers slid into his hand, holding on to him.
“Don’t go,” Remus whispered, his eyes now on Sirius’.
What was he meant to do about that? They were both drunk, Remus had been through a lot, and he didn’t want it to look like he was taking advantage of his state.
“It’s ok, I’ll be in the room next door if you need anything,” he assured him. He tried to get Remus to lie down, but he held on to his hand and didn’t let go.
“I can play you some rain sounds?” he offered, a bit desperate, not quite thinking straight as the alcohol was making him a bit dizzy. Or maybe that was just the effect Remus had on him.
“No, you,” Remus pouted, tugging at his arm.
Sirius wanted to. He really, really wanted to lie down with him, tuck him close and hold on for dear life. But it didn’t feel right, Remus might not want the same thing if the circumstances were different.
“Please? I don’t want to be alone.”
The conflict in his mind dimmed and he sighed, defeated, ‘cause there was no way Sirius could say no to that.
Please, don’t regret this tomorrow.
He nodded, and Remus smiled and let Sirius tuck him into bed with the blankets up to his chin. Sirius removed his shoes and went to the other side of the bed, lying on his side on top of the covers.
Remus turned on his side as well, and then they were face to face with just a few inches between them. It was dark, but not dark enough that Sirius couldn’t see Remus’ face, his soft curls, the freckles over the bridge of his nose, those beautiful honey eyes, the curve of his lips...
How the fuck was he supposed to sleep with him right there?
It would be impossible. All he could think about was how only a few hours earlier they’d also been this close to each other, how their breaths had entwined, driving him mad. He’d been so sure that Remus was about to kiss him. And he’d wanted him to, fuck, he wanted it so badly. The need to be closer was becoming unbearable.
But maybe it was all just wishful thinking, considering the way Remus had ran from him.
He hadn’t realised he was still staring at Remus’ lips until they moved, just barely, to whisper almost inaudibly.
"Goodnight, Sirius."
When he looked up, Remus’ eyes were already closed, and a few seconds later the sound of slow, even breathing filled the room.
Sirius watched him sleep for a while; his face finally relaxed and more open than it’d been all night. Stretching slightly forward, he tilted his chin up to press a soft kiss on Remus’ forehead.
"Goodnight, Re."
156 notes · View notes
kopikokun · 4 years
Text
Tell Me What You Want Me to Do to You༄ mark l.
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↳ On an awfully planned trip with your best friend Mark, the place you end up spending the night in is not what you had in mind. Oh well, at least Mark’s there to keep you company. And apparently, he’s a pretty great kisser too.
pairing: bestfriend!mark x f!reader
genre: fluff, suggestive, friends to lovers, college!au
wordcount: 1.8k words
author’s note: i’m so sorry that i can’t add the ‘keep reading’ thing. i’ve tried, but every time i do it, the whole post gets wonky and i can’t edit it on mobile anymore. i’ve even tried desktop tumblr but the same thing happens :(
Request 32: Mark + “I need a hug.” (42) + “Stop being so cute.” (67) + “Put me down!” (153) + “There’s only one bed...” (154) [F2L + Suggestive]
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— 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝.
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In hindsight, a trip with your best friend sounded like a more than sound idea. The two of you had combined what limited knowledge you had about general adulting, scrounged up most that you could considering your financial situations as two college kids, and, in essence, had made things worked.
Or at the very least, you think, eyes scanning the room, taking in the general gist of the next addition to your mountain of already existing issues, made things happen.
And to answer a question; yes, there is a significant difference between work and happen.
Mark sighs wearily. It’s most likely due to the ridiculously lengthy car ride the two of you had been subjected to just to get here (and the back-and-forth bickering over whose bright idea it was to decide to go on holiday when the travelling industry is at its peak—it had been Mark’s, by the way, something about promotions and discount prices) and the even more absurd hike—or as the cheery staff liked to call it—expedition to your room.
“I can’t believe you convinced me to take a trip to the middle of nowhere, Mark.”
“Excuse me, this is not ‘the middle of nowhere’. According to the website, this is a ‘refined establishment which offers a fresh look into life alongside Mother Nature’,” defends Mark, letting the duffel bag stuffed with clothing he has slung over his shoulder slip to the ground with not an ounce of care.
“Well, that’s marketing for you.” You roll your eyes. “Just admit, you screwed up.”
Mark scoffs, unwilling to admit his defeat. “Not my fault that you’re a city girl.”
“This has nothing to do with me being a ‘city girl’. And you say that like you’re not a city boy.” Mark is tempted to say something petty in response but bites back his words. “And we have a bigger problem at hand right now, Mark.”
“I wouldn’t say it’s a big problem…”
“Dude,” you deadpan. “It’s a big problem. There’s only one bed.”
Mark clicks his tongue. “We can come up with something… I, uh, I could sleep on the floor?”
“In this weather? You’ll be dead of hypothermia by morning. So, no.”
“Christ, alright then I guess we’ll just have to sleep on the same bed,” says Mark casually, falling onto the linen sheets. The bed creaks under his weight.
You shoot him an incredulous look. “Together? On the same bed?”
“Yeah, why not? We’ve done it before when we were kids.” Mark stares blankly up at the ceiling. “What’s so different about back then to now?”
You laugh wryly. “What’s different? We did it when we were kids, Mark. Kids.” Your face warms as you give Mark a once-over, taking it how much he’s grown into his good looks over the years. “I can list off plenty of things that have changed since we were literal children.”
Mark flips onto his side to face you head-on, an elbow propping him up. “Why? What’s wrong? You got a crush on me now?”
You roll your eyes, but your cheeks pool with even more blistering heat. “Ugh, as if.”
“Damn, alright then, Cher Horowitz,” jeers Mark.
You stick your tongue out at Mark. “Whatever. Pass me a pillow. I’ll take the floor.”
Mark jolts upright like a meerkat on the lookout. “What? No, you take the bed. I’ll take the floor.”
“No, I’m good. You can have the bed to yourself. I don’t mind, honestly.” You jerk your thumb towards yourself, pushing your chest out proudly. “This ‘city girl’ can handle a little bit of cold.”
There’s the muffled rustling of sheets and the padding of feet against the floor before a pair of arms coil themselves around your waist from behind you, which by the way, doesn’t help your cheeks which only grow hotter by the second. You turn to face Mark who stares at you with nothing but genuine concern.
“No way. This ‘city girl’ is taking the bed.” His arms curl tighter around you, pulling you even closer to him. “Come on. I’ll sleep on the floor.”
“No, Mark it’s—”
Your refusal is cut short when you feel your body grow weightless as your feet are lifted off of the ground.
“Oh my God! Holy shit, Mark.” Like a hapless ragdoll, you’re almost effortlessly thrown over Mark’s shoulder. You’d be impressed by how surprisingly strong he is given his skinny-looking exterior, but you find that this isn’t quite the right time to be complimenting his physical abilities just yet. Mark grunts when you writhe in his hold. “Put me down!”
“With pleasure.”
You yelp, startled when Mark nonchalantly drops you onto the bed, following suit not too long after, his face inches from yours. His arms cage in your face and you feel your head grow dizzy, intoxicated by his scent. Your heart lurches when the bed groans with all the brute force being heaved onto it.
Mark grins cheekily at you, an airy laugh leaving his lips. “Jesus, you should’ve seen your face! It was priceless.”
You stare up at him, subconsciously drinking in his beautiful features; from the hairs of his eyebrows to the flutter of his eyelashes to the rosy apples of his cheeks and right down to the dip of his cupid’s bow, you gawk at him in silence for a moment or two. You realise that it’s actually been a moment or two too long since you’ve said something by the way Mark’s smile falters and his eyes begin to roam your face with just as much intrigue.
You clear your throat, averting his keen gaze. “Yeah, alright. Haha, very funny, Mark.”
For once, Mark doesn’t have any witty comeback for you in response. In fact, the room is drop dead silent save for the mechanical whirring of the ceiling fan. Mark’s adam’s apple bobs up and down in apprehension as his eyes scan your face once more. You can’t look away from him. Your eyes are glued to his as your heart hammers in your chest, its vibrations ringing in your ears.
He makes a move to get off of you but freezes when he feels your hand wrap around his bicep, urging for him to stay as he is. Mark watches you with interest, waiting for something more, but all you can do is continue gaping at him. You pull your bottom lip between your teeth, blinking up at him. You wait with baited breath as Mark licks his lips.
“What?” he whispers. “What is it you want from me?”
You inhale sharply.
Mark’s voice drops several octaves, turning almost gravelly, which is so out of character for him you nearly blanch. “Come on, I want to know. Tell me what you want me to do to you.”
You mumble your words incoherently, your mind too clouded over to formulate an actual sentence.
“Speak up, pretty girl. I can’t hear you.” Mark leans into your ear, his hot breath making your hairs stand on end.
“Want you to kiss me, Mark.”
“God, you’re so cute. Stop being so cute. Say it again.”
You huff, growing impatient. “Please, Mark. Just kiss me already.”
“Holy shit.” He tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear. “That's really hot.”
Mark kisses you tenderly. His lips press softly against yours, testing the waters and gauging your reaction. He tastes of the spearmint gum you gave him on the ride here and he smells like the fabric softener you always use when you go over to his place.
His hand cups your cheek, and at your hum of appreciation, he finally decides to kiss you with a little more fervour.
You’re not sure how, but you soon find yourself in Mark’s lap as he rests his back against the headboard. You chase after his lips when he pulls away and he giggles, the sound so bizarre considering the atmosphere. You don’t stay displeased for too long though, as Mark begins kissing down your jaw, which tickles, if you're being frank.
Mark’s grip on you turns bruising when you scratch at his nape, savouring the way his breath hitches. As things progress, you can’t help but wonder how this exactly happened. Sure, you’ve had those moments where the idea of being more than friends with Mark excited you, but it’s not like you dwelled on the thought often. All throughout your friendship, you’d never had any moments like this, but you’re surprised you two hadn’t done this sooner, because God, this feels amazing. Thinking back on it, there have been moments where you’d caught Mark staring a little too intensely at you and vice-versa, but you brushed it off as a common occurrence, being friends with a guy. But, you suppose, given the fact that you and Mark are making out right now, probably means that those stares meant a little more than you had first surmised.
You pull away when Mark grips the back of your neck. He pauses, his gaze finding yours.
He swallows dryly. “You okay?"
You exhale shakily, a whirlwind of thoughts consuming you. “Wait- I- Can we,” you take a breath, “can we stop?”
Immediately, Mark’s expression melts into one of distress. “Yeah, of course we can.”
“Thanks.” You nod timidly, climbing off his lap and sinking into the spot beside him. You chew on the flesh of your inner cheek, guilt washing over you. “I- I’m sorry.”
Mark’s head swivels to face you. “What? No, don’t be sorry. It’s fine.” He fiddles with his fingers. “Are you okay? Did I do something wrong? I didn’t hurt you did I?”
“What? No, no, you didn’t.” You laugh reassuringly. “I just- I don’t know- I just—”
“No, it’s okay. If you want to stop, I'll stop. No explanation required.” Mark smiles at you. “But… we’re still cool, right?”
“Of course we are, dude.”
Mark snickers. “Wow, I can’t believe you just called me dude after we made out. You’re really something else, huh?”
“Hey! You should take that as a compliment.” You shove him playfully. “I don’t call just anyone dude.”
“Well then, it’s an honour. Dude.”
Your conversation dwindles into silence. You feel anxiety begin to make its way up your spine as it latches onto you, sinking its gnarly teeth into your back. What now? Can you two really go back to being just friends if that’s what you ultimately decided? The faint spinning of the fan is the only thing that nulls your worries. Cautiously, you reach for Mark’s hand beside you and thankfully, he reciprocates the gesture. You sigh happily, finding solace in the warmth radiating from his fingertips.
“Can I—no I mean—can we cuddle?” You await a response from Mark, only to be greeted by nothing. “Uh, I’m sorry. That was dumb of me. Pretend I didn’t say anything.”
You attempt to pry your fingers from Mark’s but he refuses to let you slip away. Instead, he brings your hand to his lips, placing a chaste kiss on the back of your palm. “Hey, no. Let’s cuddle. I’m down for that. I need a hug, anyway.”
It’s astounding how easy it is to get into a spooning position with Mark. And as corny as it sounds, you feel like you fit perfectly in his arms, snug against his chest. You allow yourself to relax in his embrace until you feel something digging into your thigh.
“Is that—”
“Yeah, sorry,” says Mark sheepishly. He shifts in his position, but to no avail. He just hisses in discomfort. You smother a giggle. “I’m still, uh, a little… excited?”
“My bad.”
Mark pokes your waist, fishing that repressed giggle out of you. “Dumbass.”
And as you lay there with Mark, your laughter fading as the moon rises, you can’t deny the sparks of attraction that have ignited. You’re not quite sure exactly how you feel, but you think, whatever the outcome, the two of you will be alright.
516 notes · View notes
fantastic-bby · 3 years
Text
Take Me Home
Pairing: Reader x Wooyoung
Word count: 1.6k
Genre: Angst | Exes to lovers
Summary: Wooyoung sits at a bar, getting drunk while all he wants is for you to take him back home
Warnings: Alcohol consumption | Swearing
A/n: So… I may have listened to Take Me Home about a bajillion times since the album was released and… this happened
P.s I’m reposting this bcs Tumblr’s being homophobic and the tags were scuffed FeelsWeirdMan
Masterlist
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Wooyoung hasn’t felt this lonely since right after you left him. The darkness that shrouds his mind is something that has refused to leave him alone for almost the past two years, but it hadn’t been this bad in a while. It’s bad enough that he feels like he struggles to breath as he sits at the bar, a glass of whiskey in one hand and his phone in the other. Wooyoung’s thumb hovers over your contact, his mind battling with his heart as he painfully contemplates calling you.
He’s slightly drunk, it’s obvious that he’s at least tipsy, but he’s still sober enough to know how much he fucking misses you. Wooyoung clenches his jaw, teeth grinding together as he locks his phone and places it down onto the bar; the glass of whiskey making it to his lips as he downs it.
“Another one?” the pink haired bartender questions, an eyebrow raising. Wooyoung gives him a look before pulling a few bills out of his pocket and placing it onto the counter. “This would be your fifth glass of the night, man.”
“I don’t care,” Wooyoung sighs, “just pour me another.” The bartender purses his lips before obliging. Wooyoung isn’t dangerously intoxicated to the point where he would need to get involved, so he serves him.
“You wanna talk about it?” the man asks as he pours the alcohol into the empty glass.
Wooyoung contemplates it. Why would he be telling a complete stranger about why he feels like such a piece of shit? Then again, it’s not like he’s even spoken to anyone about it. He sighs before admitting, “I’m thinking I should call my ex.” The bartender gives him a look as he slides the glass back to him.
“It’s not exactly my business, but how dangerous would that be?”
“Well,” he sighs as he thinks about it, “I would either be getting blocked or slapped in the face.” Wooyoung lets out a bitter chuckle as he swirls the whiskey around in the glass. “I fucked up and now I’m alone. Every time I think about them, I feel like I’m suffocating while I spiral down this never ending hole.”
“Have you spoken to them since the break up?” The bartender asks as he starts wiping down a spot on the counter right beside Wooyoung that was previously occupied by someone else.
He shakes his head, “never mustered up the courage to do so.” He brings the glass to his lips and takes a sip, embracing the burn in his throat because he feels like he deserves it. “I was an asshole. I know I fucked up, but I just want to talk to them at least once more. Just to tell them I’m sorry.” Wooyoung feels like he might have a full on breakdown right in front of the bartender, who he assumes is San because that’s what it says on his name tag. He feels his chest tightening like it usually does whenever he thinks of you. “I just want to take back every shitty thing I did to them. They didn’t deserve any of it.”
“Have they ever tried reaching out?” San further questions, his hand halting for a moment.
“The last time I spoke to them, they looked so… cold towards me. The last time I had actually seen them, it looked like they just wanted to get away from me.” The memory is fresh in Wooyoung’s mind. You had stood in the apartment you shared, hands clenched into fists as you glared at him and your entire body trembling with rage. He felt like your eyes were the reason he felt so frozen, but he couldn’t cry in front of you no matter how hard the tears were trying to force their way out. Wooyoung realised a little too late that he was hurting you. There was nothing else he could do and staying with you would just destroy you. “I…” Wooyoung trails off when he feels his eyes starting to sting with tears, “I think it’s better that I stay away from them.”
“How long has it been?”
“At this point,” he pauses to look at the date on his phone, “almost two years. It’s almost been two years and all I can do is think about them. No matter how many people I sleep with or how many people I try dating, all I can think about is (Y/n).” Wooyoung looks at his phone, still battling the thought of calling you. San watches as Wooyoung slowly starts to space out, only able to wonder just how much regret clouds his mind and heart.
“I think,” San speaks up for a moment, his voice snapping Wooyoung out of his thoughts, “the best thing you should do is stop drinking before you end up doing something you may regret, head on home and get some rest.” The younger man snorts at that.
“I don’t know how I could feel more regret than I already do,” he says as he finishes his glass and slides it towards San. “But I do think I should probably head home. Thanks for the talk.”
“No problem, man. Next time you come here around this time, just ask for San. I’ll serve you.” He gives Wooyoung a smile as he takes the used glass off of the counter. “Have a good night…”
“Wooyoung.”
San nods, “have a good night, Wooyoung.”
“You too, San.” He gives the bartender a half smile as he slides off of the barstool, turning around and freezing in his tracks. Wooyoung’s eyes widen when they meet yours and you’re staring at him with the same amount of disbelief. “(Y-Y/n). What are you doing here?”
“I…” you trail off as your mind registers the fact that Wooyoung’s standing right in front of you, “I just wanted to get a drink.”
“Long day?” Wooyoung questions, his voice cracking and making it more awkward than it already is.
You make a mental note of his voice crack and nod. “I got off work a while ago and I—uhh—didn’t feel like going home just yet.” Home. Home is you, Wooyoung thinks but he shoves the thought down with the rest of his feelings. You’re right in front of him. Where’s the apology that’s replayed in his head over and over again for the past year?
“(Y/n), can—could we talk for a bit?” he musters out. “I-It’s been a while. Maybe we could catch up?” Wooyoung wants you to accept his offer so badly. Even if he gets just a few moments, just a few minutes, it’ll be enough.
“I don’t know, Woo…” you trail off when the memory of your last meeting flashes across your mind.
“Please?” If his words aren’t enough, it’s his eyes that do it for you. They look so empty, so desperate,
So lonely.
“Okay.” You take a deep breath as you nod, fearing whatever would come next.
“I want,” Wooyoung gulps. Why is this so difficult?! “I want to say that I’m sorry.” His words come out slowly, but after they’re out, he gains more courage. “I want to say that I’m sorry. For everything. I treated you like shit and I know you deserve so much more, but I just wanted to apologise.” You stay quiet, letting his words linger in your mind. Your relationship with Wooyoung was toxic and you would admit that in a heartbeat. But that way he looks at you now, so lost, your heart can’t help but crack at the sight of him. You’ve spent the time away from him healing from the break up, but you wouldn’t deny that you still love him. Wooyoung was—is—everything to you.
“Wooyoung,” your heart aches even more at the way he looks so scared of your answer. “I forgive you.” He lets out a breath that he didn’t realise he was holding, shoulders relaxing slightly. “I don’t think I ever really got rid of you. No matter how many times I’d spring clean my apartment and throw away things that reminded me of you, I think I’m still too in love with you to throw you away.” Wooyoung doesn’t know how to feel. Should he be happy that you’re still in love with him or should he feel terrible that you’ve been hurting this entire time? “And I know that you struggle with things like this—especially talking about feelings—but I hope that we can move on from this feeling okay.”
“Move on?” he speaks before he thinks and immediately regrets it right after. You blink a few times before your lips part in realisation.
“Woo…”
“(Y/n), I love you.” Wooyoung feels every inch of himself starting to break as he takes a few steps closer to you, arms open, body trembling. “I love you so much,” his voice starts breaking when he hesitates to hug you. When you pull him into the hug, whatever wall he’s set up goes crumbling to the ground. “I love you so much. I’ve missed you so much—I’m so sorry. Please give me another chance,” Wooyoung’s words come out jumbled, mumbles of apologies and confessions just pouring out of his mouth like a broken faucet as you hold onto you. You cry when you feel his wet cheek burying against your shoulder. You’ve missed the feeling of him—you’ve missed Wooyoung.
“I’ve missed you too,” you confess as you allow yourself to mold against him. “I love you.”
“Please take me home,” he sobs. “P-Please, (Y/n).”
“I’ll drive you back—”
“No,” Wooyoung cuts you off and you feel his nose nuzzling against your neck. “I-I wanna try again, (Y/n). Give me another chance, please.“ You pull away to look into his glossed over eyes pooled with tears that stream down his face. “Please take me home—home to you. I-I’ll be better. I promise.” You take a deep breath as you thread your hand through his blond streaked hair before nodding.
“Okay.”
146 notes · View notes
desertno3 · 3 years
Text
everything comes back to you (sean wallace x fem!reader)
Sean Wallace is the love of your life and had been ever since you were both sixteen. This is why, in the aftermath of his father’s murder, you do everything you can to make sure no one lays a hand him.
5.4k words.
A/N: To think this all came from me watching this scene of Joe from Volume (2012) and thought… I need to write about bb Sean. There’s also this post which is mostly what was in my head when I wrote this. Also, I was going to say Sean being soft around the people he loves is my own personal headcanon but like… it is actual canon, lmao. It’s so easy to forget because the man is cold most of the time. Anyway, I clearly have too many thoughts about this character. Enjoy. (also formatting on tumblr is shit so if you want to read this with the formatting I intended, head over here to AO3)
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prologue.
“What the hell are you up to?” Sean demands as he watches you bustle around your shared bedroom, effectively turning it upside down as you stuff your belongings into a travel bag.
“Business,” You say, hardly pausing to look at him.
“Business?” He scoffs like he doesn’t believe you. You don’t blame him. Finn died mere days ago and every day since then you’d been acting strange. Between consoling Sean and helping the Wallace family with the funeral arrangements, you’d been answering calls at random hours of the day and going off to meetings even though nearly all business operations under the Wallace Corporation had been halted. Sean had been too caught up in everything to question it but now that you’d just told him that you were flying off to god knows where for alleged business, he was suspicious.
“You know something, don’t you?”
You don’t reply.
“Tell me.”
When you remain silent, you see his jaw clench in anger but that’s not what makes your heart squeeze painfully in your chest. What gets to you is the hurt you can see in his eyes, hurt that his fiancé of all people is keeping things from him. You know it’s unfair to be doing this to him right now but you had no choice.
You walk up to him, taking his face in your hands.
“You just have to trust me on this, Sean,” You say softly. “Please.”
“I can’t trust anyone right now, y/n.” He says it like a plea. He needs you to be the one person he can trust one hundred percent, wants to be able to put you apart from the rest of the world who seemingly had it out for his family right now. He can’t do that when you’re acting like this.
The statement doesn’t hurt you in the slightest. You understand where he’s coming from, understand why he can’t even trust you, but still, you wish he did.
“You can always trust me,” You tell him but you know it won’t be enough. That’s confirmed when his gaze goes steely and he pries your hands from his cheeks.
“If you step out that door, don’t bother coming home.”
You step back like you’d been burned by the ultimatum. “Sean, don’t-”
He shakes his head.
“Whatever you’re doing, I hope it’s worth it.”
_________________________________________________
one.
“It’s just so annoying, you know?” You huff, falling back onto Sean’s bed and pressing the heels of your palms into your eyelids. You’re sixteen and in the throes of teen angst, irritated by the confines of your parents’ demands regarding what you currently could and couldn’t do at that age.
“Yeah, I know,” Sean replies in solidarity from where he stands near the window.
You let out a sigh, the anger that was bubbling in your chest starting to dissipate now that you’d finished venting about it.
You’re so lost in your own thoughts that you don’t realise Sean has moved from his spot across the room to the bed beside you. The mattress dips a little as he sits and slowly lies back so he’s parallel to you.
You move your hands away from your eyes and your heart jolts when you crane your neck to look at him and realise how close he is.
“Thanks for listening to my ranting,” You murmur, starting to feel guilty that you’d come over to hang out only for it to end up being just him listening to your tirade.
He lets out a small chuckle. “Anytime.”
You smile gratefully, your heart rate accelerating as you continue to stare into his eyes. God, you like him so much. You have for a while now. As he inches closer, and you don’t know whether it’s deliberate on his part or not, you wonder what it would be like if you just kissed him right there.
“Y/n…” He says hesitantly, his gaze flicking down to your lips for a fraction of a second. “Can I-”
“Ooooh, Sean and y/n,” Billy sing-songs obnoxiously from the doorway - the doorway that both you and Sean had forgotten was wide open.
Sean leaps up from the bed and growls at his brother, who continues to tease him unfazed.
“Fuck off, Billy!”
He slams the door shut and everything descends into silence once more. You sit up and watch as Sean remains at the door, his shoulders tense. You get up and make your way over to him, feeling bolder than you ever have in your life.
“Sean,” You say softly, grabbing his attention.
He turns to you, the look in his eyes hesitant, and you use that opportunity to press your lips to his. You pull away just as quickly, gauging his reaction, but then he pulls you towards him again and this time the kiss is deeper, needier. Your hands steady yourself against his chest as his own move up to cup your jaw.
You’re both breathless when you pull away, sporting matching shy smiles as you look at each other.
“I really like you, y/n,” Sean confesses and your heart feels like it could burst.
“I really like you, too, Sean.”
~
When you and Sean get accepted into different universities, it worries you more than you let on. It would be the furthest away you’d ever lived from him and you were worried about what that meant for you both. You’d spent your last years of high school falling deeper and deeper in love with him and you weren’t ready to let him go. Not now, not ever.
“Hey,” He murmurs, noticing you’d spaced out again. “What’s wrong?”
You shrug it off but he’s not buying it. He shifts on the couch so that he’s sitting facing you and takes your hands in his.
"Talk to me.”
You end up telling him everything. How you don’t like that you’re not going to be able to see him as often as you do now, how you’re worried that the distance might put a strain on the relationship, how you really, really don’t like the idea of breaking up with him.
You half expect him to brush it off or to tell you that you’ve got nothing to worry about but he doesn’t.
“I don’t like it either,” He admits. “It’s going to be awful being so far away from you but it’s only a couple of years, yeah? We can do that. And then I’ll start working for my dad and you’ll start working for some cool startup and we can move into a flat in London. You and me.”
While your boyfriend’s vision of your future together warms your heart, you’re still hung up on the ‘couple of years’ you were going to be a good distance from each other.
“Babe,” He says, bringing your attention back to him. “We’re going to be okay.”
You nod, finally relenting and agreeing with him. There was no point in letting yourself get eaten alive with worry, not when he clearly loved you just as much as you loved him. It was going to be okay.
“I love you,” You tell him and he smiles, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.
“I love you too.”
~
Sean’s vision of the future wasn’t too far off. You manage to secure a flat just before you both graduate and by the end of the summer, you’d moved in. Sean starts working immediately alongside Alex at the Wallace Corporation and you spend about eight months working for a new tech startup on the other side of London before Finn Wallace offers you a job. It goes over with Sean just as well as you expected it would - which was not well at all.
“Are you really going to throw away everything you’ve worked hard for? To be my dad’s fucking assistant?”
You sigh in exasperation. “I’m not throwing away anything, Sean! Do you think I’m that stupid? I’m going to use more of what I learned at uni as Finn’s assistant than I am now at that fucking sad excuse for startup and you know it!”
Sean knows you’re miserable where you currently work so you don’t know why he’s so against this.
“You don’t want me working with you, is that it?”
He sighs, palms pressing against his eyelids in frustration.
“No,” He says eventually. “No, it’s not that. It’s just… I don’t want my dad having a hold on the both of us. You’re supposed to be free from all the Wallace Corporation shit, out doing your own thing.”
Oh.
You step towards him and he instinctively wraps his arms around your waist. You press a light kiss to his lips, your fingers ghosting over the facial hair he had recently started sporting.
“Sorry to tell you this, Sean, but your dad’s had a hold on the both of us the moment we started dating. Maybe even before that. I’m sure if he didn’t approve of me, I would’ve been out of your life a long time ago.”
Sean grumbles at the realisation but he knows it's true.
You lovingly run your thumb over his cheek. "Nothing in London is out of Finn Wallace's reach."
You’re not a fool. You know Finn offered you this job for a very specific reason. If you were going to continue being with Sean, and at this point, everyone knew that was absolutely going to be the case, you were going to have to know how the company worked. And you weren’t against it. If Sean was to be the CEO one day, you refused to be the kind of wife who was oblivious to their husband’s dealings.
~
Gone is the youthful innocence of the lanky boy you fell in love with when you were sixteen. Sean is filled out and a lot more serious, trying to be more than what he is for his father’s sake. You suppose you're the same, too. It's not easy, being primed to eventually take over a multi-million dollar organisation (connected to an insidious underground one to boot) and Finn put just as much pressure on you as he did his son.
“It’s not my blood,” You mumble when Sean walks into the bathroom to find you soaking in the tub, the water around you a deep red. “Mostly.”
Wordlessly, he comes over and drains it before filling it back up with fresh water. You don’t move as he does so, still shaken and borderline catatonic from having just killed somebody for the first time. Sean doesn’t have to ask, he can just tell that’s what you’ve come back from. As he silently washes the blood from your skin, you look over to see his lips set in a tight line. You know he’s mad. Not at you. At his father, maybe. But there’s nothing he can do now. There’s no going back from this.
~
Everyone thinks you’re the power couple of the Wallace Corporation, steely and unfeeling, and you suppose in many ways you are but you also know that in other ways, you’re still the teenagers you were before, still completely and utterly smitten with one another.
“Hey,” Sean greets you, kissing your cheek before pulling out a chair and sitting beside you in the empty boardroom.
You look at him in surprise as he starts digging into some pre-packaged salad. “Hi. What are you doing?”
“Thought I’d have lunch with you.”
“It’s three in the afternoon.”
“The meeting ran overtime.”
You give him a sympathetic look and he rolls his eyes. “It’s fine. C’mere.”
You shuffle closer to him and let him tuck you under one arm while he forked salad into his mouth with the other.
“What have you been up to, hm?”
You let out an exhale, resting your head against his shoulder. “Meetings, same as you.”
You’re interrupted when Alex pops his head in with an apologetic look on his face, knowing he was disrupting a rare moment between you and Sean. Usually, the both of you would be so busy you’d only see each other in passing at work.
“Finn’s looking for you, y/n,” He tells you before disappearing again.
You sigh, getting up but not before kissing Sean on the cheek.
“I’ll see you at home.”
“Mm, see you.” He mumbles, swallowing his mouthful of salad before his hand shoots out to grab your wrist. “Wait, give me a proper kiss.”
You smile and comply, laughing when Sean pulls you back in for another and another.
“I have to go, Sean!”
“Alright, alright,” He says, letting you go. “I’ll see you later.”
~
"What's all this?" Sean asks when he comes home one night to find you in the kitchen looking like you’re in the middle of making a more elaborate dinner than usual.
"Just something to celebrate you finishing up that contract," You say, smiling when his arms circle your waist and his lips press a kiss to your cheek. "I was also thinking now that the contract's done, you've got all the time in the world to fuck me."
You all but squeal when he picks you up and carries you to the bedroom without a second thought.
"The food, Sean!"
"The food can wait," He murmurs, dropping you onto the bed. You giggle when he moves to hover above you, his lips brushing against yours. "I've got to take care of my fiancé first."
~
It’s those memories of your relationship with Sean that flood your mind as you lean against the brick wall of a Soho back alley, the hand pressing against the wound on your side not doing much to stop the blood seeping from your body faster than you would like.
Dread had filled you the moment you heard about Finn’s death and it had less to do with what happened to him and everything to do with the man you were engaged to, the one who was set to take over the company in his father’s wake. Despite Sean being the clear successor to the business, you knew Finn’s death would still leave a power vacuum in both London’s corporate and criminal worlds. You knew people would be out for Sean, trying to off him so that they could step up and take Finn’s place. And so, since the day Finn had died, you’d done everything you could to ensure Sean wouldn’t be harmed. Even after Sean’s heartbreaking ultimatum, you’d left and had been all over the country and London trying to stop the people that needed to be stopped. This last job you’d just carried out would have been it. It would have sealed the deal and would have kept Sean safe for good. Too bad you were probably going to die because of it.
You wince as your back slides further down the wall, your legs giving out and leaving you to drop unceremoniously onto the concrete. Each inhale felt like a billion knives entering your side and you knew you weren’t going to last much longer.
It was worth it, you think to yourself. It’s the last thought you have before your eyelids get too heavy to keep open, Sean’s last words to you echoing back in your mind. It may have cost you your life but was worth it if it meant you’d just ensured Sean would keep his for a long while.
_________________________________________________
two.
Despite the number of people crammed into your hospital room, the only sound to be heard is the steady beeping of the machines that had been attached to you. It had been a hell of a night for all of them and one that wasn’t over yet. Jacqueline’s frantic call to Sean about seeing you get wheeled into emergency surgery had cut short the tense discussion the Wallaces and Dumanis were having around the dining table. Sean had all but sped to the hospital, everyone else trailing behind him. Despite everything that had just been revealed to him that night, it all became secondary in comparison to the fact that Jacqueline had told him you were practically dying.
Everyone but Sean looks up when Ed steps back into the room, shoving his phone into his pocket.
“That was Jevan,” Ed announces to all of them. “Things have changed.”
“What things?” Marian asks, the tone in her voice still bitter. It’s a wonder neither she nor Sean have kicked the Dumanis out of the room but it was because there was still so much to be discussed - especially now that you were back in the picture and what happened to you remained unclear.
“The investors now want to keep Sean alive.”
A silence settles over the room at Ed’s revelation. It was mere hours ago that Alex had revealed it was the investors who wanted Sean dead.
“She knew,” Sean mutters, finally speaking up. His eyes raking over your nearly-lifeless face as you lay unconscious on the hospital bed and his mind thinks back to the last conversation he had with you. Business, you had told him then. Now, he had no doubt you had something to do with the investors’ most recent decision. “She knew they wanted me dead.”
“How?” It’s Alex who asks, vocalising the same thought Sean had been turning over and over in his mind. “How did she know where to find them? Who to talk to?”
No one has an answer. The machines beep steadily, filling in the silence until Ed sighs, a realisation dawning on him.
“Finn,” He states like that alone makes the answer clear. “She would’ve known through Finn. Think about it. When she was his assistant, he made her go with him to nearly every meeting he had.”
Everyone in the room was aware of the latter, of course. It was part of your job. It had even been a point of contention between Sean and his father at one point, why you were let in on meetings that he should’ve been in on too if he was going to take over the company one day. "She’s just there to make the coffee, son," Finn had laughed but that wasn’t true in the slightest. You were the one who took down the minutes, noted down anything of importance, kept tabs on any and all of Finn’s dealings with everybody. That was your job and through it, you ended up knowing more about the business than anyone else and you didn’t even realise it. You didn’t realise just how much you knew, how much knowledge you could use as leverage, as blackmail, until Sean’s life was on the line.
After Finn died, you did wonder whether he knew what he was setting you up for when he hired you, wondered if he always knew Sean would eventually need protecting and knew that you would do it without hesitation if you had the capability to do so.
It’s Ed, here in the hospital room, who comes to the realisation that he absolutely did.
“She knows more about Finn’s dealings with the investors than all of us in this room combined,” He continues. “Because he never actually needed her to be his assistant. He needed her to be someone who would know how to talk to them. To protect the company and its successor from them if need be.”
“Successor?” Marian asks. “You mean Sean?”
Ed nods and everyone jumps as Sean suddenly throws his fist against the bedside table in anger before whirling on the older man.
“You knew about this,” He seethes. “You knew he was doing this and you just let it happen.”
“I didn’t know this was his reasoning behind it, Sean, I promise you. But it makes sense. As his son, protecting you was a priority. Through her, Finn made sure you’d be kept safe.”
"Fuck that.” Sean spits in anger. “Fuck that. She's a priority too. You hear me? She needs to be kept safe too because if she's not alive I may as well be fucking dead."
_________________________________________________
three.
“I should’ve fucking realised that’s what she was up to. I should’ve fucking known,” Sean mutters as he looks at you, still lying there unconscious. “She risked everything for me.”
“Are you surprised?” Marian asks him. It’s just the two of them in the room now.
She, for one, isn’t surprised in the slightest. Having known you most of your life, she knew you had it in you. Maybe Finn saw that too, since it was what he ended up priming you for.
Sean sighs. He’s not surprised either. What he mostly feels is anger - at his late father for putting you in that position to begin with - and shame. He’s ashamed that while you were bending over backwards to try and keep him alive, he was doing fuck all for you. He'd even broken your fucking heart in the process. He’d regretted it the second you’d left the flat but he couldn’t get into contact with you afterwards. Either you’d changed your number or you weren’t answering his calls. He’d even hired a fucking private investigator to find out where you’d gone and what you were up to but they hadn’t come back with anything solid enough that could lead him to you. It was like you’d disappeared off the face of the earth.
"She paid you off,” Sean says bluntly the moment the PI enters the hospital room. It’s not a question. After everything that had surfaced in the last twenty-four hours, it clicked into Sean’s mind the reason the private investigator couldn’t find anything on you.
"She did,” They confirm.
Sean swears under his breath. He curses that fact that you were too good at this and curses the fact that it was probably Finn that taught you how, the same way Finn taught him. He should’ve fought harder to stop you from accepting his dad’s job offer. All those years ago.
“She paid me off,” The PI says. "But that doesn’t mean I didn't do my job."
Sean is handed a folder full of notes on your movements and a flash drive full of photos they’d snapped from a distance.
"You are a very lucky man, Sean Wallace. To have someone like her in your life."
_________________________________________________
four.
To say you’re surprised when you open your eyes to a sterile hospital room is an understatement. You were so sure you had no chance of getting out of that alley alive. Still groggy, you briefly wonder if it was the investors who managed to get you here in time - the strange puppet masters that they were - but your train of thought is halted when you realise Sean’s sister is in the room with you, sitting beside your hospital bed.
“About time you woke up,” Jacqueline says softly, a kind smile on her face. “How’re you feeling?”
Her question brings your attention to the relentless ache you feel all over your body.
“Like shit.”
She hums. “Well, you’re lucky you aren’t dead. You gave us all a scare getting wheeled in here the way you did.”
You shift a little, trying to get yourself in a position that would ease the pain somewhat. “How’s Sean?”
Jacqueline has to stop herself from rolling her eyes because of course that’s what’s on your mind right now. You coming back from the verge of death asking about Sean ran in a similar vein to the way Sean had been adamant about not leaving the hospital since you’d been admitted. Like two peas in a pod, she thinks. Always have been.
“He’s just out in the hall, actually,” She informs you. “On the phone to mum. He’s not going to be pleased he wasn’t here when you woke up.”
“But he’s okay?” You ask her.
“He’s okay.”
You let out the breath you didn’t realise you were holding, your head sinking further into the pillow.
“Good,” You say, shutting your eyes in relief. “That’s good.”
Only a few seconds pass before you hear the door open and shut and a heart-achingly familiar voice break the silence.
“How is she?”
Again, Jacqueline has to keep herself from rolling her eyes. Her brother would always ask that same question every time he returned to the room, no matter if he was gone for an hour or for just a couple of minutes. At least this time, she was glad to give him an answer other than ‘she’s the same as she was when you left’.
“She’s awake.”
Your eyelids flutter open and your heart jumps when your gaze lands on Sean.
“I’ll leave you both to it,” Jacqueline smiles when she looks between her brother and yourself. She comes over and rests her hand on yours. “I’m really glad you’re alive, y/n.”
You give her a grateful smile and watch her leave before your eyes flicker back to the man standing at the door. He looks healthy, you note to yourself. Exhausted, but healthy.
“Sean,” You whisper, breaking the silence.
“Hey,” He says softly, approaching your bedside. You slowly sit up and tears start to pool in your eyes at the sight of him here, so close to you. Safe and alive. He notices and reaches out to wipe away the stray tears that had rolled down your cheeks.
“I’m so glad you’re okay,” He murmurs and you have to hold back a sob.
"I did it for you, Sean," You can barely get the sentence out, your voice catching as you start to get choked up by emotion. "Everything I did-"
"I know," He says, cupping your face tenderly. His eyes are glassy too. "I know."
“I couldn’t let them hurt you. I couldn’t-”
You stop as your tears start to flow uncontrollably. You’d kept so much of your emotions at bay as you dealt with everything and now that it was all done, they were spilling over in waves. He gently pulls you into his embrace as you cry, mindful of your injuries. One hand strokes your hair comfortingly as you cling to him, soaking the front of his shirt with your tears. You keep muttering apologies into his chest and he has to tell you to stop because you have nothing to be sorry for. He should be the one apologising, he thinks. No matter what he does for you for the rest of his life nothing would come close enough in magnitude to what you’d just done for him.
You sniffle as your sobs finally start to subside but you don’t let go of him just yet.
“I want to come home, Sean,” You say quietly, your cheek still pressed against his chest.
“You are home,” He assures you, his arms affectionately squeezing you ever so slightly. "You're here with me. You're already home."
_________________________________________________
epilogue.
Sean barely leaves your side while you recover - not for business, not for anything.
“The company needs you, Sean.”
He shakes his head. “Alex has it covered. You need me.”
“I can take care of myself.”
“Believe me, I know. But still. In sickness and in health, right?”
You snort. “We’re not married yet.”
His arms wrap around your waist.
“But we will be,” He murmurs. “I would’ve married you a long time ago if I had it my way.”
“My mother would’ve murdered you.”
Sean chuckles, all too aware of it.
It was about a year and a half into your university lives that Sean decided he genuinely wanted to marry you and, of course, he had run it by your mother.
“I’ll give you my blessing, Sean,” She had told him. “But only if you promise me you’ll give it a few years until you propose.”
“Just trust me on this, okay?” She said after Sean had frowned and asked her why. “I know you love her and I know she loves you but there’s no need to rush.”
Sean had agreed reluctantly but now, years later, he understands where she was coming from. At the time, he had naively been sure there was nothing the two of you couldn’t handle. You’d both handled being at different universities so well, after all. Now, he cringes at the fact that that was his metric but he figures he couldn’t blame himself. At that age, he definitely never anticipated having to deal with all the shit life had thrown at you both in the last few months alone. He’s somewhat grateful your mum told him to wait because now, after everything, he’s more sure than he ever was about the fact that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.
~
You’re finally back home, in your own bed, lying on your back because it’s the only comfortable way you can lay down with all your stitches and injuries yet to fully heal. You turn your head to look at Sean and you smile. He’s on his back as well, the both of you craning your necks awkwardly to look at each other.
“What?” He asks.
“This is very familiar.”
He snorts, knowing exactly what you’re referring to. He props himself up on his elbow and looks down at you.
“At least this time I’m not scared to do this.”
Your eyelids flutter close as he leans down to press his lips to yours. You reciprocate, leaning up to deepen the kiss before pain shoots up your side, making you hiss.
“Sorry,” He murmurs, pulling away.
“It’s fine, just the stitches.”
His thumb grazes over your cheek. “Rest.”
He smiles at the way you huff. You never did like staying still.
~
You let out a content sigh, sinking back in your office chair. It had felt like a lifetime since you’d been in here and finally being back felt like you were putting in the final piece in the puzzle. It was the last thing you needed to feel like everything was starting to go back to normal.
A knock on the door grabs your attention, Sean popping in to check on you. “You ready?”
You nod, gingerly getting up and following him to the boardroom for the family meeting.
~
“So you know Alex and I have been talking,” Sean says to you once everyone had filed in and taken their seats. “About what will be best for the business going forward.”
You nod.
“Things have settled down and we’ve managed to broker temporary agreements with everyone to keep them in line. However, we need to guarantee they won’t act out in the future. So we need someone heading the company who they will listen to, someone who they trust. Alex wants to continue doing the finances and I’m better off sticking to making the buildings so… we were wondering if you would be the CEO.”
Your expression goes slack in shock. “What?”
“We’ve run it by Ed and mum and they agree, too. You’re our best bet.”
You look between everyone in the room, bewildered. “Why?”
“Because you know more about dealing with the investors and shareholders than any of us,” Alex says. “You saw first-hand how Finn did his business with them, something me and Sean rarely did. And they not only know you personally but they trust you, too.”
“Y/n,” Ed pipes up. “Whether he did it deliberately or not, Finn taught you everything he knew about the most important part of running this corporation. Alex knows finance and sales, Sean knows property and asset management but you? He specifically taught you how to bargain. And bargaining and making deals is part of what keeps the Wallace Corporation on top.”
“All our shareholders, the investors, they’ll be okay with this?” You ask.
Ed gives you a look, “You tell us.”
The weight of the responsibility hits you in full force but you’re surprised when you don’t feel scared. You feel sure. They were all right, you’d been doing this already.
You nod. “They will be.”
And it’s not a threat so much as it’s just pure confidence on your part. You knew their strengths, their weaknesses, you knew you would be able to keep them in line with your words, either finding mutual ground or using certain things as leverage to get what the company needed. You could bargain with them the same way you’d bargained for Sean’s life. You could do this.
You meet Sean’s eyes across the boardroom table and he smiles at you, pride blooming in his chest at the thought of his girl, the one he had fallen head-over-heels for at sixteen, being the CEO of his dad’s company. You smile in return. God, you loved him. Your entire world, your whole heart, belonged to him. And his to you. It always had been, and it always would be.
_________________________________________________
End notes: The first kiss setting in one. I took straight from Volume, lol, and then two. is set after that meeting scene at the end of Episode 7 of Gangs but I’ve taken some liberties with that meeting and diverged from canon right before Ed tells them Finn never wanted Sean near the business because Sean’s reaction to that hurts my heart. So that’s not a thing in my fic world. Anyway! Too many thoughts about this show. Let me know if you enjoyed this fic!
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braunbakery · 3 years
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salvation, maybe (i)
☞ reiner braun x reader [fem bodied] [chapter word count: 2.5k]
☞ sfw, angst, fluff, post-season 3 [after 4 year time jump], season 4 spoilers
☞ cross-posted on ao3 (very much ahead on ao3, just wanted to bring it to tumblr)
☞ fic plot: you have walked these streets many times before. you have passed this bench many times before. you have seen this man (lost in his thoughts, always drifting, always looking lost) many times before. but this time, this time you take a seat.
next
i. hero
the wind blows your long skirt against your legs as you make your way down the street, shoes tapping against the cobblestone of the ground. liberio is reasonably busy and you find yourself accidentally knocking shoulders with a multitude of people. the slightly chilly late morning air nips at the skin on your face and you instinctively wrap your jacket a little tighter around yourself, repeating the list of what you need to get in your head.
eventually, you reach the less populated part of the market street. you know that you don't really have any business being here - all of your necessities lie on the busier side of the street (probably all running out at this point, judging by the ever-increasing crowd.) but, you have become so accustomed to making your way to the quiet end of this street to see if he still sits on the bench in front of the broken fountain, slumped over and staring at his knees. sometimes, on sunnier days, his long off-white jacket is crumpled next to him. sometimes he is leaning back, his neck tilted back towards the sky and his arms tightly crossed across his broad chest.
but the constant remains, he is always here.
since he had returned from wherever the previous warrior mission had taken him, every morning he sat at this bench in such an obvious amount of distress that you wondered how come no one else ever said anything. did his comrades never take notice of his seemingly permanently furrowed brow, or his fists that somehow were always clenching and unclenching? or were they all also fighting their own battles, sitting on their own benches and being watched by their own strangers?
his name is reiner braun.
you know this name, everyone knows this name. everyone knows his close-cropped blonde hair, his broad build, his sullen face (you wonder if he only smiles on command). he and his comrades bring honour to liberio and offer an excuse to marley for why you and your neighbours deserve to live. you want to feel grateful and proud, but as you watch him stare mindlessly into the distance, hands absent-mindedly playing at his uniform collar, all you can feel is pity.
sometimes you feel yourself slowly gravitating towards him, your feet moving before your mind even realizes it. today is one of those days when his sorrow is contagious, radiating out of him and into you, and suddenly you really are moving. it has been almost a month since he has been coming to this bench and sitting in silence. it has been almost a month of you idly watching him, wondering if you should say anything. if there's anything you can even say. but, he is a soldier. if you don't act now, he will be whisked away to whatever new conflict marley has conveniently found themselves in. you just want to say something. anything.
and before you know it, you have somehow planted yourself a few inches away from him on the other side of the battered wooden bench. reiner shifts in his seat, but doesn't say a word. your thoughts are racing and you contemplate whether or not it's too late to back out now. whether or not you can sit in silence and pretend your feet were just tired and you needed a rest (despite the fact you have only been outside for all of fifteen minutes.) if you seemed as melancholy as he seems to you, would you want someone to offer you solace? to acknowledge your struggle? you don't know, you don't know, you don't know. and before you know it, words of no real value are tumbling out of your mouth.
"not too bad of a day, huh?" you awkwardly say, eyes flitting towards reiner quickly to see if he will acknowledge the stranger trying to making a conversation about the god damn weather. reiner shifts in his seat, his dazed stare cut short as his body slightly slowly turns towards you. he still doesn't actually look at you. but, to be fair, you still haven't actually looked at him.
"i suppose," he mumbles, looking around the street as another gust blows through liberio, sending papers flying into the air.
"it's a shame the fountain doesn't work. maybe it would've made the day a little better," you comment, your eyes glancing back at the battered fountain behind the bench. it is years old, the white stone now faded into different hues of brown and green, and vines hooking and wrapping their way all around the structure. you suspect that maybe it had never actually worked at all.
"maybe," reiner replies. his head turns towards you, watching you crane your neck behind you to see the fountain. secretly, you don't want to turn your head back and witness him probably ignore your efforts of conversation. can you blame him? he has seen war and has been through hell, from paradis to the endless conflict between the mid-east allies. why would he decide now that a fountain no one actually cares about is what peaks his attention? "but, i think we'd have a bunch of kids jumping in if it did work. so, could be for the best."
realistically, the fountain is too small for anyone bigger than a toddler to attempt to climb in. but, you still find yourself slightly smiling in relief at his response, realising that maybe you weren't completely hopeless and maybe reiner didn't truly want to be completely alone.
"i suppose," you echo his earlier response back to him, no longer craning your neck and returning to face forward with him once more. your smile grows even wider as you notice the corners of his mouth softly curling upwards. much better. your eyes meet his for a moment and you can't look away from the deep hazel, the warm welcome. he is the one to break the stare, eyes glancing off to a passerby.
"you have a thing for fountains then?" he jokes. but, as you stay looking at him, you can see that despite his attempts at some kind of humor, his gaze is still crestfallen and his fists are still clenched at his sides. you don't know what to say.
"no, just for nice days," you retort, offering another toothy smile. like reiner, it doesn't particularly reach your eyes. maybe this is a mistake. maybe you are just bothering him and tiring him out from making him have to put up some moderately pleasant facade. maybe this is just for your own gain. because you are alone. because you are lonely. you grab at the empty woven basket next to you, wondering if you should just leave.
but the truth is the truth, and you are alone and so is he. is it such a crime to maybe want to be alone together?
"are you just out getting groceries?" reiner casually inquires, shoving his balled fists into the pockets of his long jacket. he looks at you again. everytime he has ackowledged you so far, a part of you feels that maybe this is okay. that maybe the small moments where he isn't lost in his own head and instead spares looks at a stranger makes it all okay. in the end, you don't really know him, and he doesn't really know you. but do you need to know someone to want them to feel okay?
"yeah," you say, leaning foward to take a peek at the busier end of the street, "but i think i'm a bit late. everything other than maybe bread is probably gone by now," even though this is going to be an inconvenience, you don't find yourself regretting it. you're happy to sit here next to reiner, even if it means another morning of trying to wake up early and make your way through the masses.
"huh," reiner huffs out a small chuckle, eyeing your empty basket, "you should probably go grab that bread then."
you slowly stand up, slinging the basket at the crook of your arm and turn to face reiner. he looks up at you questioningly. there was no way you had waited almost a month just to have some measly conversation about nice days and a century-old fountain.
"do you want to come?" you ask, trying to feign at least a fraction of the confidence you wish you held in this particular moment, "to the bakery, i mean." obviously he knows what you mean. why would you say that? reiner slightly raises his eyebrows at your invitation, but deep down, you are adamant that this is not the last time you talk to him. you are not going to let him sit on that bench until the next time he's shipped off halfway across the world.
"which do you go to?" he asks after a pause.
"the one by the tailor's," you answer.
"i don't know...technically, i did just meet you. you might be out to kidnap me and force me into building a fountain." you roll your eyes, a smile tugging at your lips.
"i don't think you have anything better to be doing," again, reiner responds with another raised eyebrow, "accept the pretty girl's invitation to buy some bread with her, reiner."
reiner laughs. a real, actual laugh. and you know that you aren't going to regret the sudden burst of confidence when you get home.
"how do you know my name?" reiner asks through his smile, getting up as he dusts off his warrior uniform.
"doesn't everyone, reiner braun, warrior of marley, hero of liberio?"
"hero," he repeats after you, standing a little closer and once more gazing into the distance, "i don't know about that." you both slowly start walking back along the way you had originally come.
"how come?"
"i think heroes are supposed to be good people."
his honesty stuns you, but you try not to let your composure falter as you both make your way down the cobblestone path, maneuvering through the crowd that seems to finally be clearing away as the morning breaks into afternoon.
"well," you pause, trying to think of something that will mean anything to him. that will relax his brow a little, or soften out the stress on his face, "i don't think you're a hero." you can feel reiner freeze for a small minuscule moment, his face turning toward you.
"oh, really?" a small, teasing smirk makes its way across his face. he can't hide the confusion painted on his features. maybe he's not as taken aback or hurt or offended because you really are just a stranger. maybe's it's easier for him to be honest because you really are just a stranger. maybe he is speaking freely, with the knowledge he may never see you again, because you really are just a stranger. and, even though, deep down, a part of you wishes you were something more than a face he would eventually forget, you are grateful for the modicum of anonymity that somehow seems to evaporate an unspoken boundary between you.
"heroes die," you say, bluntly, "maybe i think there's more for you than that." and that was the truth, or as much of it as you could force yourself into saying. reiner stares at you blankly, his teasing demeanor fading away as he stops in his path. maybe you had said something wrong, or reminded him of something he wishes he could forget, but you are glad that in some weird, confusing way, you managed to express that he needed to live.
you had walked on for a few steps before realising he had stopped, and turn back to find reiner still staring at you. people walk between you and around you, but his gaze doesn't falter. his face is unreadable, but eventually, he is cut out of his moment of stillness and crosses the distance between you.
"that's a bit grim, but thanks, i guess?" he laughs, scratching at the back of his neck. you are a couple of steps ahead of him as you both turn the corner, getting closer to the bakery stall. you look back at him, watching as he strides on behind you, arms swaying by his sides and hair being lightly blown by the wind.
"you know," you start, stopping in your path again. reiner follows suit, waiting for you to continue, "that doesn't mean i don't think you're a good person."
reiner looks up at you. he doesn't look back down. you think you can feel yourself sinking into the ground.
"really?" he says, after a pause. you can hear the chatter of the bakery up ahead, the footsteps of more shoppers walking past you, the faint howling of the wind in your ears, the playful cries of children weaving through the hoards of people littered throughout the street. and you look at him. really look at him. you know, for sure, for definite, that you don't want to be just a stranger. you want him to remember your face and your words. you want him to think he deserves something more than desolation. so, you repeat.
"it doesn't mean i don't think you're a good person."
you take a few steps towards him and grab the sleeve of his jacket, gently tugging him towards you as you continue walking towards the bakery. you walk side by side, a little closer now. this time, the silence is comfortable, and when he looks down at you as you ready your basket to collect the bread of your choice, you're already looking up at him and offering a smile. as you grab the money out of your purse, you stare at reiner's hands which hang at his sides.
you don't want to be a stranger. you will see him again.
it doesn't mean i don't think you're a good person.
you hand the money to the vendor, thanking her and steadying your grip on the now filled basket. reiner silently tries to grab it from you, even though it weighs practically nothing, but you move your hand away, eyeing him threateningly.
you have nothing else to buy, but you keep walking. your hands brush accidentally on purpose (more so on purpose on your behalf.) reiner doesn't ask where else you need to go, he just keeps walking with you, and you are grateful. you grab a roll of bread from the basket and break off the end of it, dividing it into two and offering a piece to reiner. he takes it from your hand and offers you a smile. you want to see that smile again.
no, you want to see him smile because of you again.
it doesn't mean i don't think you're a good person.
it just means i want you to live.
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dallonm-archive · 3 years
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[image description: a cropped image of a pink sky. on the right hand side is a bunch of darker pink clouds. Just left of the centre is a full moon. In the centre, in a white serif font reads "writing update" /end id]
july writing update
Hi friends! This writing update is me pretending I did Camp Nano and didn't kinda give up a week in! I had a proper goal and everything, but a lot of things got in the way that I'm not gonna talk about here because I already ranted about it in another update I'm drafting rn. Lets just say it's Disability Pride Month and being not neurotypical or able bodied in writing communities and their inherent focus on productivity is Hard.
But I did get some writing done and wanted to do a little Camp wrap up post regardless. And I'm doing it now because I'm cancelling the last week of July for some rest/self care and I do not want to think about writing for that time and if I write a tumblr post about July Nano being over my brain will think it's actually over <3 I will probably do updates like these for most months tho! Depends on how much I write lol! This one is not too long (by my standards) and has some Revelations, Revelations, Life Cycle of Massive Stars, Nocturne for the Holy and a new wip idea 👁️
excerpts under the cut!
general taglist ; ask to be + or - ; i only have one! ; @childhoodlovers @svpphicwrites @abiandwriting @kowlazovdi @avi-why @ryns-ramblings @kitblogsthings @bijouxs @bookphobe @moonhungers @alicewestwater @bookpacking @shaelinwrites @onlyganymede @theelectricfactory @write-like-babs @oceancold @sidhewrites @wolf-oak @oasis-of-you @coffeeandcalligraphy @cecilsstorycorner @howdywrites @keira-is-writing @flip-phones @piyawrites @avakrahn @goose-books @finch-goes-write @ziyin @aphaimaniis @isherwoodj @laughtracksonata
I'm also editing this in to say I only just realised that July is my writeblr birthday month and that is very weird to me! A year and a couple days ago I impulsively turned an old blog into a place to document writing for me and ended up meeting people who now mean the world to me and my writing blossoming in a way I never thought it would. And the funny part is it doesn't feel like it's been a year, ever since I joined it's just felt like life has Always been this way and I cannot fathom that it hasn't. I'm sappy bc it's 4am lol but ultimately the friends I made (you know who you are) and the community I found is what retaught me the value of writing and helped me unlearn toxic ideas and whilst the last year was tough I wish I could tell July 2020 Dallon (who did not realise he was Dallon yet </3) what July 2021 would look like.
revelations, revelations ;
Oh the absolute state of affairs with this book rn. Nothing bad but I don't know when I'm gonna update y'all because sometimes I do not know where to start when talking about this wip lol! Currently on a break with it (but also my thesis work is on late 20th century queer lit/history rn so am ever really free of RR? <3) but had a lot of fun with it at the end of June/start of July. Anyway here's Dorothy finally revealing more of herself to me after a year. Dorothy as a character is like, I truly believe she is capable of killing a man but the story she is in just does not allow that so I am trying to grow her unhinged side a little bit in other ways bc I know she has it in her but I also really cannot deal with the plot repercussions of her actually killing a man! I'm sorry Dotty but this'll have to do!
(cw for groping/a man being creepy as hell, death/funeral mention, drug mention, drowning imagery kinda)
There’s too much to tell Felix. That his sister lives on the fringe of Castro and has attended three funerals since September; that it’s January 11th and she’s already attended one this year. That his sister drives through sunsets and imagines parties: the amber dusk, warm mosaic tiles, platters of Greek salad skewers and shrimp tostadas, and sometimes Jolie joins her and they share a blunt on the hill. That his sister bought an aquamarine body-length dress for six bucks in a thrift store sale bin, so when her and Jolie broke up for the second time, she waltzed into a sunset party, locked arms with a CEO’s son and gave him a fake number and plucked strawberries out of champagne and blended so well nobody noticed when she left. That during the summer of ’83, his sister walked a neighbour’s Golden Retriever on Wednesdays, and on the sixth Wednesday he gave her a wad of tens with one hand and palmed the back of her neck with the other, so she walked his dog to the beach and stole another hundred from his wallet. That his sister bombed an interview for a Nursing school and didn’t get home until night and missed their monthly call, and Jolie heard the phone ring and didn’t take a message, so his sister snuck into the CEO’s son’s villa and floated in the centre of their heated pool like a cloud. A pause, a breath, an Opheliean threat.
life cycle of massive stars ;
Switched to LCOMS this month because I was burnt out with RR and it made such the difference! I really love working on two novels at once because it keeps me consistently creative but also both of these books are so different so its always refreshing to bounce back into one from another. I have a whole update in the drafts rn for this so keeping this part brief but still love this book, still the best thing that has ever happened to me, me and this book will have a glorious summer wedding etc etc. These excerpts are from chapters that summarise the first semester of each character's first year and have to say it. has been Very Fun to get into the mindset of Freshers Melodrama. Here's Junie having a crisis and an unhealthy relationship with her hetero flatmate :( (alcohol cw for both excerpts)
In October you are drinking double espresso and trying to breathe normally in lectures and you are trying to figure out your favourite colour because Fleur asked and you stumbled out an answer (Purple, I think. Violet? Lavender? Indigo?) and it didn’t match hers (I like yellow. I like sunlight). You buy mugs from IKEA to paint you paint cats and fireworks and constellations and moon phases and daisies. You try to scratch paint stains off your desk. You do laundry at 2am. In October you colour code your notes with pastel highlighters. You go to the library at 3am. You paint your nails sunlight and hate it. You finish an essay that’s due in December. You knock on Fleur’s door at 8am so she makes her 9am. You wear off the shoulder tops and you let a girl dab glitter on your collarbones and you are watching Fleur kiss a boy from the neighbouring hall. You bite your sunlight nails. You break the handle off your IKEA constellation mug. You leave your keys in a lecture hall and stand at the reception for forty minutes waiting for them to realise that the keys on the desk have the moon chain you mentioned - or, you are waiting to say it yourself. You are watching the rain trail down your window. In October you get a halo headband tangled in your hair you are sipping a vampire themed cocktail that tastes like acetone you rip your heels off and you go home early and do laundry at 2am and you are waiting for the courage to tell Fleur you don’t like clubbing - or, you are waiting for her to ask where you are. In October you are many things / a good student a dancer a painter an angel a big sister an alarm clock you are nocturnal and a lucid dreamer and confused about your sexuality / and it’s still October but it’s not because it’s November now and you are still Junie but not because you don’t know who Junie is. It’s November, it’s September October November December. It’s 2016 2017 2018 2019. You are fragments and you don’t know if you are a kaleidoscope or shattered glass.
And here's first year Tomas being like I Moved Countries For University And All I Got Was Homesickness And A Crush On My Flatmate And Resurging Autistic Symptoms And This Lousy T Shirt (cw: vomit mention, injection mention, parental death mention)
Kristen is seven months younger and five inches taller than you. He’s the last flatmate you met and the only one you talk to beyond kitchen greetings and passive aggressive texts about dirty dishes. He is too quiet and too loud and not the type of person you befriend. The first night, he lost Ring of Fire and downed the concoction of Echo Falls, Dark Fruits, Jack Daniels and coke, vodka and lemonade alongside a cigarette and said he’d let God figure out the rest. He held your hair back when you threw up amaretto and held onto your knee when you first self-injected testosterone. He taught you Yorkshire dialect and you pretended to understand the Yorkshire dialect. He told you he got diagnosed at four and you told him you didn’t get past the first assessment but sometimes you flick the bathroom light on and it’s fire: the orange on the orange towel is louder, the white on the white tiles are louder, the colours and light and sink and showerhead are prickly and all you can do is blink and breathe until it fizzles out. You reminded him to take his meds and asked if you were weak for wanting to drop out and hop on the first Eurostar to Rotterdam. He reminded you to take off your binder and asked if he was robotic for not grieving his mother. You spent inky nights on the kitchen floor, counting the dead flies in the lights and scooping crumbly coconut ice cream out of a maker you got for half price in TK Maxx. You spent dusk-dusted afternoons at the global street food markets, at the vegan markets. Spent student loans on raspberry lemonade in recycled cups, veggie burgers in beetroot buns, got him hooked on poffertjes and advocaat and could’ve cried when the vendor spoke to you in Dutch. Sometimes you didn’t buy anything. Just liked hovering at stalls ambered with fairy lights, writing down Etsy stores on your notes app; just liked Kristen’s impulse to trek forty minutes into the city for a market he didn’t know existed until five minutes before; just liked how he always invited only you, cancelling your other plans last minute, the feeling of being ambushed; just liked how he stopped to take photos of dogs and the sunset; just liked how he looked haloed under lampposts waiting for Ubers, golden on golden.
This is also nearing creative nonfiction because Sheffield truly is a haven for just. vegan markets and cafes lol! I experimented with veganism there and never struggled to find something and at this point I call myself a fake vegan because it's too easy to be vegan in Sheffield and too difficult to be vegan in my actual hometown. And the global street food markets!!! SO GOOD! I miss pre pandemic days
nocturne for the holy ;
Giving her a little shout out because she does exist actually! I've figured out a really good system for working on two novels at a time, so my plan is maybe to start properly on this after I finish either RR or LCOMS. Idk I got 3 novels to pick from haha oops! I did do some free drafting back in April though and found it recently and I Like It! And I edited it so it counts as Something I Did This Month :) Also have decided that I loathe this working title <3 Okay see you with an update for this novel in like a year, sorry for the absolute zero context for this excerpt hehe
The morning I was due back, I hadn’t yet decided that this would be my last visit. I wandered between rooms like an overstayed guest, like I didn’t know which crockery lived in which cabinet and which bedroom had the best view of the overlapped hills. Dad would wake for his run in an hour, plastered to his twenty-year-old routine. Mum would pretend to be asleep until breakfast. Until then, it was myself and the house, hazed by sleepy sunrise. Downstairs. The peeling paisley wallpaper in the lounge, the lilies in the middle of the kitchen table, the vases of candy floss pink peonies wilting on every windowsill, the desolate double swing-set in the garden. The mist-clogged mornings. I stood outside in my dressing-gown until my fingertips felt numb. Upstairs. The sage coloured bathroom. The bathtub I’d laze in with my clothes on and no water because it was the quietest room in the house. The dusty dance trophies on the top of my wardrobe. Wine-flushed Jeanette in my teenage bedroom. The stale grey mum painted my teenage bedroom after I moved out. Minus their room, I stalked the layout of the house three times before settling back into bed - teenage Nora’s bed. Nora who cared for peonies and pushed her brother on the swing set and flung her ceramic ballerina at the wall and jogged with her father and collected wine bottles and acorns and kisses from girls who were supposed to visit for dance practice. Before I left, I’d have cycled each room another three times. And in every room he was there, hovered in the corner like black mould.
love this update bc it's like i've got my third person, my second person, my first person! collecting all the POVs like chaos emeralds :)
eulogy for our burnings ;
-looks away-
girl help I did it AGAIN!!!! Apparently Camp Nano is just the perfect time for me to get novel ideas. I made this post specifically to talk a bit about this because I have no idea when I'll draft it but it's certainly not soon. This is not me trying to doubt my own skill but I feel like I am not in the place I'd like to be as a writer to tackle this project with the zest it needs, however I am v excited by the prospect of it! Don't know how I feel about the working title bc I'm like "that doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about this wip to dispute it" but the only purpose my working titles serve is to sound pretty lol! But here's the tea:
1991, UK.
2nd person present + past. Very flexible form. I can't decipher how yet but I'm feeling interviews, newspaper articles, receipts, grocery store lists weaved with actual narrative, that kinda vibe.
Best summary is we follow our nameless narrator, a stealth trans man, as he becomes unhealthily obsessed with a man who "hires" him to photograph the buildings he burns
Very,,, isolated? Minimal settings, minimal characters, minimal prose etc. Almost claustrophobic
There's basically only two characters and they are probably the most morally deplorable, indefensible characters I've created which just means most of you are gonna LOVE this /lh I do too I do too
Only comp title I can give is it has the vibes/tone of Boy Parts by Eliza Clark (just with none of the nsfw content lol if you've read the book you know what I'm talking about) (also that book is great for morally deplorable women protagonists but omg look up the content warnings because it caught me off guard! enjoyed it tho gave it 4 stars)
The pinterest board is the best visualisation of the Vibes also follow me on pinterest lol
And that's all I've got today! A bigger Life Cycle of Massive Stars update coming in the next few weeks. Might do a proper intro post for Eulogy For Our Burnings but idk!!! It's a surprise :) Thank you for reading this far!
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you are my people - modern vikings au fic {?}
summary : The Lothbrok brothers are an utter liability. Thankfully, they have a few good friends to keep them in check, or turn the shenanigans up a notch. Enter Myda, Treena and Toby Wick. Friends since childhood, with them all together life is far from dull. But when sodafloats and skinned knees turns to beers and bruised knuckles, will things stay the same?
words: 1240 (ish)
warnings: Drug and alcohol use, mention of death, anxiety, getting high in a bathtub (i have no idea what that counts as), swearing, and just some sad fluff
authors note: i am so nervous about posting this!! this is a fic that i wasn't really planning on writing! It's been bumbling about in my notes for longer than i'd like to admit to, and couldn't sleep so - uhh tadaah?! i have no idea where im going with this -please let me know what you think <3
I have never ever in my life posted fanfic on tumblr before - the whole concept is utterly confuzzling to me! any tips would be graciuosly welcomed x
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There was no logical reason why, after getting home from a 12 hour shift absolutely cream cracker-ed with a house to tidy, washing to do and two new episodes to binge on Netflix, she would find herself stomping down to Hviterks flat at 9pm on a Wednesday night. But that was exactly where she was.
Her red trainers thudded along the pavement. There was just something that was tugging at her. A little voice in the back of her mind that wouldn’t stop nudging. So Myda had somewhat reluctantly left the comfort of her nice warm house, to stomp down the street in the frost, for really no reason at all. Just a feeling.
After the third attempt at knocking, her spare key was in the lock. The door was flung to the back.The whole place was in darkness. Maybe he wasn’t-
Water. She could hear water. She was at the bathroom door before she knew where she was. Scrabbling at the door handle.
“Hvit? Hvit?” She called out, finally getting the door open with her whole body weight behind it.
He was in the bath. The plug in, cold water pouring over him, pouring out over the lip. Water all over the the floor. A steady stream running everywhere. He was there, he was alive. In the bath, fully clothed, staring at the wall. And as high as a fucking kite, but alive. Alive was the main thing.
She took the breath she didn’t realise she’d been holding. “Hey Hvit, you okay?” She said gently, grabbing a towel from the back of the door.
He seems to hear that. He looked in her general direction. “Mm fine.”
“Okay,” she breathed out, “Let’s get you out of here, eh?”
“No, no. I’m fine.”
“Nah, I think we’ll get you out of here.” She pulled the plug, the water spiralling down the drain. The floor was still sodden, but once she’d gotten Hvit sorted she’d deal with that. The floor wasn’t going to get pneumonia.
“Oh!” Hvitserk said, “The waters leaving!”
“Yeah, I think we should do the same. Come on Hvit, we’ll get you to bed.”
He looked at her, utterly puzzled. “Mydz? When did you get here?”
She smiled sadly, “Just now by Hvitty. Come on. Up you get.”
He looked first at her, then back down at himself. His jeans were sticking to him, absolutely soaked. As was his t shirt. The water was nearly out of the bath. He scrabbled around for the bath handles, before sitting up and nearly falling back again.
A hand on his back stopped him.
“There we go.” Somehow, she got him persuaded out of the bath. Now she had a very cold, very soggy Hvitserk. Taking him by the shoulders she pushed him down onto the toilet seat.
“Hvit, I’m going to get these clothes off of you. Okay?” Myda said. Fingers fumbling in the gloom of the unlit bathroom. The only light being the cocktail of street and moon light falling in from the tiny window. She found the bottom of his t shirt and pulled it up over his head.
“Hvits, I’m going to need you to raise your arms for me.” A mumble, and his arms raised. All of 2 inches.
She got the neck of his t shirt up over his soggy blond locks. And managed to get the arms off of him. The t shirt was thrown back in the bath in disgust. Now came the next problem - jeans. She bent down a little, carefully pushing his body back towards the wall. She found the button and the zip, got both undone. She wiggled down as much as she could.
“Can you stand up with me?”
Hvitserk took her arm in an utter daze. Gently rising to his feet, he never noticed that she’d pushed his jeans down further, and then pushed down on them with her foot to get them down around his ankles. He was sitting back on the toilet before he ever realised he’d not been there. Quickly, Myda hauled the jeans off of him, taking his socks while she was there. The whole lot was flung in the bath.
-
Nearly naked, and with his teeth chattering, Hvitserk stumbled into the bedroom with Myda hot on his heels. He collapsed onto the end of the bed immediately.
Myda sighed sadly taking in the scene in front of her. Empty bottles, pill packets and dirty clothes littered the floor. The curtains were to the back, letting every ounce of moonlight in to them. She stalked over to the bed, gently taking the towel she still had in her hands to Hvitserks shaking body.
“Oh Hvit,” she mumbled, her eyes welling up as she dried him off, What have you gotten yourself into?”
He just started blankly at the ceiling.
Her words not resonating.
She dried the rest of him off wordlessly. Tears were streaming down her face by the time she’d finished.
She wiped them away with an unsteady hand before giving him a watery smile. “Come on then, let’s get you into bed.”
Hvitserk lay limp like a paper doll as she manoeuvred him under the covers.
“There we go.” she mumbled, as the covers were drawn up to his neck. She gently pushed the hair from his eyes, gave his shoulder a firm but heartfelt squeeze before turning and leaving him to sleep off his high. Her heart shattered as soon as she took her first step.
-
The tears were falling thick and fast as she slid down the hallway wall. Coming to rest with her hands in her hair, her knees up in front of her. She sobbed. Thoughts raced through her mind like wild horses. What is she hadn’t have come? What if she’d decided to stay in, would anyone else have checked on him? If she’d have come earlier, would he be this bad? If she’d come later, would he still be here? Would Hvitserk still be alive? She shook her head to clear that thought, as a gut wrenching sob escaped her. She couldn’t think like that.
Her hands came to play with her bracelet in front of her as her head fell back against the wall and her sobs died away. Now she had the difficult bit. Taking a deep breath, she pulled her phone out of her pocket. Fingers fumbling with the keypad as she typed in this number. She hesitated over the call button, her nose wrinkling as she rethought her next move. Fuck it. She pressed the button and brought it to her ear.
By the third ring, her heart was in her mouth and her eyes were welling up again. The line crackled.
“Hello?” A sleepy voice drifted down the line.
Silently thanking every god she could think of, she smiled. She had never been so happy to hear a voice in all her days.
“Hey Chief.” she said tearily, “It’s me.”
“Mydz? What’s happened?” The concern in his voice was clear as a bell.
She took a shaky breath, before replying “It’s Hvitserk. He’s…down the rabbit hole again.”
The rustle of bed sheets came filtering through the airwaves. Followed by scruffle of a phone being dropped and a string of curse words. “I’m on my way.” He said calmly, “Hang tight Mydz. It’ll be okay.”
“I hope so Ubbe.”
The dial tone echoed in her head as she pressed end call. Gods did she hope so
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bugabash · 3 years
Text
Hold me while we Fall - Chapter 3
WOW, I was late with this update, whoops! And the sole reason is that i am Lazy :D
Any hoo, this chapter was written and rewritten many damn times that I was ready to just give up, but I finally got it out! Now the amazing @sweetjupiterr and I are working on this project together, and some art work will be coming out in the future :D Please check out her Tumblr and her Instagram
Enjoy :)
First / Previous / Next
AO3
Chapter 3 - Training
“My name is Commandant Sadies! I am here for the sole purpose to make you feel fear! I am here to make you piss yourself at the sound of my voice! If I do my job right over the next 3 years you will become a shell of yourself and then become a soldier we can call competent! Right now, I am looking at you fucking sack of shits and I see no one who is good enough to be in the military!” The commandant screamed from the front, his arms behind his back, “Do not mistake anything I do for kindness! Because as far as you know I am the last face you see before you become a fucking SNACK for the titans!” He glared at them all, “now! I do not give a FUCK what is between your legs, you will be treated the same and no one has any excuse to fail at anything! You are cadets first and foremost! If I hear anyone complain you will be punished accordingly! Let’s have some fun!”
The commandant was a tall, bald man with deep sunken, black eyes and his face wore a look that spoke a thousand words. He used to be the commander for the scouts, his kill count for Titans was impressive and he was described as the best commandant that the military has had in years. The soldiers he brought into the military after the three years were the best in a long time. He walked with a sense of confidence that only looking death in the face could give you.
And now he was walking in their lines, drilling almost everyone, screaming in their faces and making them sweat. So far he had completed the first line and Marinette heard a few names, one girl’s name was Rose, she was from a small village in wall Rose (funnily enough, the commandant loved using that) and she was tiny, even smaller than Marinette, with short pixie cut blonde hair. She seemed like a little doll if Marinette were honest, her voice was high pitched and she everything about her seemed fragile. When the commandant was done with her she was trembling and her head was hung. Marinette wondered if she was crying.
The next person who caught Marinette’s eye was a tall boy with black spiked hair and broad shoulders. She couldn’t see his face but she could tell he was noticeably confident. The commandant had a grin on his face as he screamed at the boy, calling him a moronic ape. The boy’s name was Kim Le Chiến, the name stood out to her because she knew it was an oriental name just like the Cheng part of her name. She knew there were other clans but they usually stayed hidden out of fear of seclusion. Like her father always used to say, people fear others who don’t look like themselves. Kim was from a hunting village that used to reside in wall Maria, he wanted to join the scouts, screaming it out proudly as he saluted with his right fist over his heart. The commandant seemed content and moved on.
Marinette spotted one girl who was tall, long dark black hair that was in a braid down her back, her fringe covering most of her eye, she seemed to be the commandant’s new favourite toy from the look he gave her. She trembled as he screamed in her face, grabbing her fringe and lifting it up much to her surprise, screaming in her face about how he wanted soldiers who could actually see the titans before they were eaten. But the worst part was when he asked her anything, her voice was so soft and she had no confidence, making the Commandant even more angry. He didn’t get much out of her, calling her a disappointment and told her to start running around the field until he told her to stop. Marinette watched her jog off awkwardly, her eyes wide and fear all over her face.
The first row turned and faced the others at the commandant’s orders and soon Marinette was watching him grab a small dark skinned boy by the head and lifted him up, glaring at him and asking him if he was dropped as a baby, he had said the wrong thing apparently when he said he wanted to join the military police. Marinette looked forward, hearing the boy be dropped. So far the others were just… normal. She watched as the commandant skipped people, eyeing one girl in particular, she had dark auburn hair that she wore down around her shoulders, the ends in a small ponytail. He eyed her with a frown before moving on. Soon the second row was facing them and the commandant was making his way down her row.
Marinette looked to the side at Alya briefly, seeing her anxiously shuffling in her place. Marinette knew she was nervous, they had gone over what they would say the night before, reciting it over and over. Marinette felt sure in herself, she felt pride in her uniform and she felt like she had found her place. She took a deep breath and kept her eyes staring ahead as the commandant stepping in front of her.
He looked her over, his eyes falling on her scar and he examined it before moving on to Alya. She sighed in relief and closed her eyes, her mind going numb as she felt her scar go cold. She hated that scar so much, but at least it got her off the hook. She felt beads of sweat drop down her back slowly, the cold water against her hot skin making her skin prickle up in goosebumps. It was such an odd feeling, but it triggered a memory of that day, those green eyes, the blonde hair, the sweat dripping down his face and on to her in the giant hand. Her eyes shot open and she controlled her breathing as she felt it start to get erratic, glancing to the side with her eyes and saw Alya trembling with wide eyes, staring at the ground.
Shit! Marinette had completely blanked and missed Alya’s turn. She would ask her about it later, now she just needed to keep her head clear and keep focused.
“Third row about face!”
Marinette stood there, staring at the tall, blonde haired, green eyed boy in front of her, her mind going blank. Time froze and she felt her heart drop into her stomach, the hair on the back of her neck standing up. She looked him up and down, how was he here? Why was he here? They stared at each other, eyes wide, Marinette’s right eye twitching slightly.
Adrien…
He had grown a few inches, his shoulder’s broader and his jaw more defined. His face had lost his baby fat and he had the beginning of some facial hair barely visible on his chin. She realised she had her breath held as the commandant stepped in front of her, looking at Adrien. She blinked and shook her head, she needed to get her composure back. She was suddenly very aware that she was in the shirt she had thought he had left for her as well. She looked over at Alya who had wide eyes and her jaw was slack. She knew Alya had spoken to Adrien before when he visited her apparently. But Marinette never asked more, the pain of it all too overwhelming at the time. She took a deep breath and looked back, blinking.
She looked at Adrien who was frowning at her. Why was he frowning at her? So, in return, she frowned back in defiance, shaking her head a little and raising her eyebrow as if to say what. His eyes moved away from her eyes as he looked her over. She scrunched her lips up and looked him over too.
How had it been a year and a half already? How were they in the same cadet corps? How had he grown up so much since then? She had barely changed, only grown a little after hitting puberty, the only change to her was probably her hair and that she didn’t smile much anymore. She caught his eyes again but… he wasn’t frowning anymore. He was looking at her like… her frown dropped and she watched him, gulping softly. He was looking at her like he did that day when he thought they were safe. Like she was the only person in the world. What was he…?
“Fourth row, about face!” And like that he turned around, his back to her. She stared at the back of his head for a minute before blocking out her thoughts on him. Turning her attention back to the task at hand, she needed to stay focused. This didn’t change anything. Just a slight bump in the road. Major bump but that didn’t matter!
“What is your name, bean stalk!” She heard the commandant yell, thankful to take her mind off of Adrien, looking over. He was standing in front of a tall boy with dark shaggy hair that fell over his forehead and sparkling blue eyes.
He came to attention, his fist over his heart with his other arm behind his back still, “Luka Couffaine, sir!”
“Couffaine, huh? Is that your undisciplined sister running around the field like a fuck up?” He yelled back.
“Yes sir! She is my younger twin sister, sir!” Luka replied confidently, his cool and calm exterior intriguing her.
“Twins huh? That’s rarity these days!” The commandant said as he pulled on his small goatee as if in thought, “are you going to be as quiet and useless as her, Couffaine?”
“No sir! I am loud and I am ready to fight!” Luka clenched his fist tighter, his brows furrowed slightly.
“Is that so? Where are you and your creature of a sister from, Couffaine?” The commandant leant in closer.
“Shiganshina sir!” He replied, his eyes darkening. Marinette raised her brows and gulped, there were more people from Shiganshina here? It was a stupid question, but she grew up there and had never seen this boy before.
“Shiganshina hey?” The commandant examined him briefly before speaking up, stepping into Luka’s personal space. “And what do you plan on doing if I allow you to graduate, private? Are you going to fuck off to the inner walls like the rest of these pussies want to do or are you going to be a man?”
“I plan on joining the scouts sir!” Luka yelled in determination.
The commandant was quiet for a minute before he scoffed, “Well, we will see if you are worth it now won’t we.” And with that he moved on.
Marinette watched him walk to the next person before her eyes went back to the boy, Luka. He caught her eyes and looked over at her. She blinked and looked back, unable to look away like she was frozen, watching as he smiled small at her briefly before dropping it before the commandant could see. Marinette blinked and smiled slightly, looking away and staring back forward, noticing Adrien’s head was turned slightly. Was he looking at Luka?
Soon the commandant was back in the front, everyone facing him at attention. “The next three years will be the worse you have ever experienced in your pathetic lives! You will be pushed to the breaking point both mentally and physically! If you do not wake up in the future hating these days then you didn’t try hard enough and should be fucking ashamed!” He yelled, “I am not training you to run off to the fucking interior, I am training you to be scouts, or the level of the scouts! Do you understand me?”
“Sir, yes, sir!” They chanted.
“This does not mean that you have to join the scouts before you ask some stupid fucking questions, but you better fucking be as good as them or else you aren’t good enough for the military and you can go work the field with the other cowards!” He started walking down the line. “Any of you worthless shits ready to quit? The wagon leaves at sundown. Now, let the fun begin!”
---
Marinette grumbled under her breath as she finished pulling on her civilian clothes. She sighed and stood in front of her wooden locker, brushing her hair in frustration. She was in a pale pink knee length skirt, light brown lace up boots and a white button up top under her faded black cardigan, with a grey scarf around her neck in an effort to hide her scar. The clothes were slightly baggy on her as they were second hand from Alya’s sister and mom, but she didn’t care at this point. Her body ached from the hours of extreme physical activity and she was starving. She put her brush down and looked over at Alya who was lacing up her brown boots. She had chosen to wear a dark grey skirt and a white shirt with a dark brown vest buttoned up on her stomach. Her hair was in a pony still, her fluffy hair falling around her face with ease.
She stood up and checked everything was in place before smiling at Marinette, “you ready?” She asked, Marinette nodded took a deep breath, the bell for dinner chiming. Great… Just in time. The girls building was the furthest away from everything so the walk took a little more of a walk compared to the boys’. But from the ruckus coming from their courters, she was certain they would be late. She rolled her eyes, boys.
“Do you think Adrien is going to approach you?” Alya asked curiously, eyes on the dirt floor as they made their way to the mess hall.
“I don’t know… It’s been so long since I last saw him, I’ve only met him once and it’s like…it’s like I have known him longer, you know? We met once but what we went through was…” She frowned and sighed, running her hands through her hair in frustration. “Intense to say the least. I just wanted a fresh start, I wasn’t expecting him to be here.”
“And he saw you in his shirt.” Alya chimed in, causing Marinette’s head to snap towards her.
“You said you didn’t know if it was his or not?” Marinette questioned with a frown and a pouted lip.
“I uhm, well you see, you weren’t in the uh, greatest of states.” Alya stammered out nervously, her fingers fiddling with each other, a nervous smile on her face. “I didn’t know how you would react! But yeah… it’s uh, his. He asked me to give it to you, then you uh… headbutted a nurse and I thought it best not to tell you. I’m sorry, girl.”
Marinette glared at her playfully before sighing and looking forward, “at least I know now, ugh, I must have looked like such a loser today, Alya.”
“I don’t think so, I was watching him, he seemed pretty shocked to see you, but I saw how he looked at you.” Alya elbowed her playfully as they started up the steps, “it was quite the look.” Alya giggled, Marinette rolling her eyes at her friend.
“I am not here for that.” She chided back before she looked to the side, blinking and walking to the railing on the balcony outside the mess hall. Alya stood next to her, her smile gone. A few others joined them as they started at the cart going up the hill.
“They couldn’t make it, gave up.” A voice behind her spoke up, “Man, I know today sucked but enough to quit?”
“Some people just can’t handle it. Get over it, Kim.” A high pitch, annoyed voice piped up that made Marinette frown and roll her eyes instinctively. She watched the wagon leave, the people in the back huddled together, their hoods up. She didn’t recognise anyone special, maybe one girl from her room but that was it. Was it really that bad for them that they had to quit? It was the first day!
“Come on, let’s get something to eat.” Alya said, tugging on Marinette’s arm. Marinette let her pull her along, turning and heading inside to the big hall that was lined with wooden picnic tables and a station to be served. Marinette followed her along, passing a girl who was stood at the doorway as if she were waiting for someone, her arms crossed over her chest and such a sour expression that made Marinette curl her lip up, she just knew this girl was going to be a problem. She had that look. She was around Alya’s height, slim with long blonde hair that was in a high ponytail, her bangs framing her face. She had perfect skin, piercing blue eyes and a mouth that seemed to be permanently in a scowl. She glared at Marinette as she passed, Marinette raised a brow at her but didn’t give her much time. “Keep moving, Scarface.” She growled, making Marinette blink and pull her scarf up over her mouth for comfort.
Marinette glanced around as they entered the hall, her already bitter mood even worse. It was mainly the girls in there, a few of the boys were already sitting, boasting away and metaphorically measuring dick sizes. She knew the signs, she had seen so many boys do it in her lessons before. She saw a few people were looking at her, whispering to each other so she turned her eyes forward.
“Do you think she got her scar facing a titan?”
“He didn’t even speak to her.”
“I heard she’s from Shiganshina.”
“Do you think she was there?”
“How big do you think it is?”
“No way she escaped a titan, she barely looks like she can break a toothpick.”
Marinette looked away, fiddling with her scarf more making sure her scar was hidden. “Don’t listen to them.” Alya said, passing her a mug and bowl. “Let’s get some food, girl.”
Soon they were sitting at a table in the corner, as Alya knew Marinette liked to be out of view. The whispers carried on unfortunately, Marinette purposefully sitting so the candlelight hit her right side of her face, chewing on her lip.
“Girl, what have I said? Ignore them. They aren’t talking about your scar, they are talking about how you got it.” Alya said, reaching over and taking Marinette’s hand. Marinette blinked and frowned slightly, “no one knows the real story but I heard a few people making shit up,” she rolled her eyes and broke off a piece of her bread, dipping it into her stew. “I heard one story about how you fought off a titan with a butter knife, hmm, was interesting.”
Marinette snorted and looked down at her food, playing with it a bit before she pushed her scarf down and started eating. It was bland, mushy and didn’t really taste good, but Marinette didn’t care. This was amazing to her from the rationing the past year and a half, and she was starving. “A butterknife huh? That’s pretty dumb.”
“Yeah, I know.” Alya said with a smirk, “I started it.” Marinette raised her eyebrows before she snorted out a giggle, covering her mouth to stop the stew coming out, Alya giggling along with her.
“You did not!” Marinette hissed between her silent giggles.
“Of course, it was me! It’s too funny! They are going to find out soon anyway, may as well let them be dumb enough to believe shit like that. And if they do, then that’s on them.” She giggled in reply, biting into her bread with a wink.
Marinette shook her head and smiled small at her friend, eyes going back over the crowd of teenagers she would soon call her comrades, maybe even her friends. As she looked back down she heard someone clear their throat to her left. Both her and Alya looked up and saw Adrien standing there with a boy Marinette thought was Nino. He was a little taller than Adrien, dressed in dark brown trousers and a black V-neck shirt, he had golden, hazel eyes and dark skin, his hair spiked on top while faded underneath.
Shit! She chocked on her bread and ended up coughing, hiding her face as she did. Alya looked over at her with a raised brow as Adrien patted Marinette on the back worriedly.
“You good girl?” She asked, tilting her head and smirking small. Marinette nodded in reply and flashed a thumbs up before grabbing her mug of water, downing it as Adrien straightened back up. Shit, shit, shit.
Adrien looked at Marinette worriedly, “Are you okay?” He asked gently, his brows furrowed together.
“Y-ye” she cleared her throat, “yeah, I’m all goo-good, I’m fine.” She stammered, wiping her mouth and sitting up straight.
“Is it cool if we sit with you, dudettes?” Nino asked, Marinette blinking as how he spoke. It was very nonchalant and was how the boys who would get in trouble a lot at school would talk. But something about him made Marinette feel at ease, like he was someone she could trust.
“Yeah, of course.” Alya said, eyeing Marinette before she moved to the right so one of the boys could slip in. Nino slid next to her on her left, smiling lazily at her. Marinette gulped and moved over too, letting Adrien slide in. She pulled her scarf up as the candlelight on the table hit her left side, her scar on full show. She looked around anxiously and saw more people looking at her and whispering. Adrien placed his plate down and watched her worriedly.
“They aren’t just looking at you, Marinette.” He spoke up, causing her to look at him with a jump, “the guys in my room found out I was in Shiganshina and saw the titans thanks to someone’s” he frowned at Nino, “big mouth. So, they’ve been talking about me too.” Marinette was put at ease a little more at the thought that it wasn’t just her. Nodding and letting the scarf fall back down, looking down at her food, willing her appetite to come back. “I’m actually surprised they haven’t come over here questioning us on it if I’m honest. They aren’t shy.”
“Well, I mean they’re probably scared of her, Marinette was it?” Marinette nodded at Nino, “I mean, I heard you took down a Titan with a butterknife and that’s how you got your gnarly scar!” Alya snorted her into her mug next to him, Marinette biting her lips in an attempt not to laugh, and Adrien looked at Nino in bewilderment and confusion, his brows raise.
“Wait, what?” Adrien asked in confusion.
“Oh, didn’t you hear? Little miss badass here got her scar by fighting off a titan with a butterknife!” Alya joked with a hearty laugh, “that’s how she got her scar.” Marinette laughed softly, rolling her eyes.
“She isn’t serious, right?” Adrien asked Marinette nervously, looking down at her with wide eyes and a pained expression.
“No.” She replied and shook her head, “they have been talking about me all day, so Alya here,” Alya waved, “told them I got my scar fighting a titan with a butterknife, of all things.” Marinette chuckled softly, taking a bite of her bread as her nerves slowly faded, hunger replacing them.
“No way, that was you?” Nino asked Alya with a raised brow, “respect!” Alya laughed and high fived Nino, Marinette smiling small and focusing back on her meal. “So, Marinette, how did you get your scar?” Nino asked cheerfully with his mouth full.
Marinette froze as she broke apart her bread, eyes dashing to Adrien who was looking down at his own bowl, his Adams apple bobbing. She looked back down at her food and cleared her throat, she knew there would be questions. “I’m from Shiganshina. I got hit by some debris when a titan fell behind us. Nothing special, simply wrong place at the wrong time.” Marinette answered as casually as she could manage, pressing her lips together tightly as she smiled awkwardly and shrugging, feeling Adrien’s eyes on her.
“Wait, you have actually seen the titans? For real?” Nino exclaimed a little too loud for Marinette’s liking. She froze, looking up to see the room was almost silent now, and people were looking over at them. “Both of you two have?”
“Nino.” Adrien warned, “Shut up.” He looked around nervously too, Marinette didn’t think it was a day he would enjoy talking about either. Marinette rolled her shoulders nervously as if she were getting out knots in her muscles, pulling her scarf up.
Nino turned and looked around guiltily, “Shit, sorry dude.” He whispered before he turned around and hunched over, shovelling his food into his mouth. Marinette fiddled with her food between her fingers, pulling apart the last bit of bread and watching it fall into what was left of her stew.
Marinette and Adrien looked at each other as the talking picked back up in the room, a frown on Marinette’s mouth and her brows furrowed. Adrien glanced around again, Marinette watching as his hair flowed on his forehead and around his ears as he looked around. She had to admit to herself, he did look incredible with shaggier hair. She blushed and looked away with wide eyes, what kind of thought was that? The thought making her very aware the last time she saw him she was only eleven and a half maybe, she was under 5”, a child still, and hadn’t even hit puberty, she should not be having those kinds of thoughts, especially because he probably still sees her as that little child.
“So, Adrien.” Alya spoke up, bringing Marinette back to Earth, “are you from Shiganshina too?”
Adrien looked back at her and smiled warmly, “no, uh, I’m actually from…” He hesitated, “uh, I’m from Stohess.” They all stared at him in shock, Marinette more than anyone.
Stohess? He was from Stohess? Why the hell was he in Shiganshina that day? That’s a district on the interior walls.
“You’re from the interior?” Nino asked in surprise, “dude…”
“I mean, I guess, it’s not exactly the interior, and plus I haven’t been there in over a year and a half.” Adrien pointed out, rubbing the back of his neck.
Alya was examining him, “you don’t seem like someone from the interior.” She leant over the table slightly. “They are usually so far up their asses that they like the smell of their own shit, you don’t seem like that.”
Adrien looked slightly amused, a small cocky grin appearing, “what? Not everyone is like that, trust me. And that could also be because I have been living with…” He was about to say something but he stopped, Marinette frowned, she was sure he was about to say his brother, but he didn’t. Why didn’t he? “I have relatives in the scouts, they took me in.” He glanced at Marinette briefly, he looked nervous. Relatives? That was one way of putting it. She knew his brother was in the scouts, and Tikki had said he had come back from the attempt to get Wall Maria back so she knew he was alive. Why wasn’t he saying anything about Plagg? She could reason that he didn’t want special treatment, but she doubted it would end up like that if anyone knew. But she wasn’t going to tell his story, it wasn’t her place, but she would question him later.
“The scouts? That’s lucky.” Nino replied, “so, you must be, like starving.” Nino laughed as Adrien raised a brow, “did they feed you as well as people say?”
“I mean, I never went hungry, but it wasn’t as great as everyone likes to say.” Adrien shrugged, “I spent most of the time alone and I always ate alone. I preferred the time I spent with the scouts if I’m honest.”
“Well, you are one of the few from the interior I think, I don’t know any of them yet, well, besides Chloe.” Nino pointed out, “everyone else is from the outers walls.”
“Who’s Chloe?” Marinette asked softly between bites, her hunger back in full force, Adrien snorting a laugh as she shovelled the last bit of her stew into her mouth.
“The bitchy one.” Alya said with a roll of her eyes, “the blonde one who looks like someone bitch slapped her expression onto her face.” Alya leant into her hand as she rested her elbow on the table, “she wanted to go to the cadet bases in the interior but got sent here instead. She’s dead set on military police, boasting about how she is going to live a life of luxury.” Alya rolled her eyes and curled her lip up in disgust. “But she is probably one of the most awful people I have ever met.”
“Wait, the girl from earlier?” Marinette asked with a raised brow, Adrien looking at her.
“Sadly, I told you, awful person!” Alya exclaimed, waving her hand in gesture.
“What happened earlier?” Adrien asked, looking between her and Alya.
Marinette frowned, pushing her bowl to the side, “after we saw the dropouts leave we passed her on the way in, she just gave me a filthy look and called me… Scarface.” She said, running her fingers over her marred cheek, feeling the jagged scar.
“What? That’s not okay, Marinette!” Adrien exclaimed, Nino looking horrified as he dropped his spoon into his bowl.
“Dude…”
“It’s fine, honestly, it doesn’t bug me.” Marinette reassured them, her eyes dancing between the boys, the light reflecting off her blue eyes.
“That’s so shit dude, you don’t say stuff like that.” Nino shook his head, “see, that’s what I would expect from a person from the interior, not… you.” Nino joked, Adrien laughing softly, but his brows were furrowed and he seemed lost in thought.
As they were chatting, a certain blonde had made her way over, slamming her hands onto the table, making all of them jump and look at her. Marinette stared at her with wide eyes, she had moved away from the noise, bumping into Adrien’s chest who placed a hand on her waist to steady her, a frown on his face as he glared at Chloe.
“How funny!” Chloe spoke up, a devilish grin on her face, “the little peasant made a joke!” She eyed Nino who just frowned at her. “Nothing to say now? How cute.” She straightened up and flicked her ponytail back with practiced ease, eyeing them all before her gaze stopped on Adrien, her brow raising. “Adrien Agreste?” She asked in genuine surprise, Adrien blinked, “last I heard you were a missing person.”
The three turned and looked at him, Marinette not moving but just turning her head to look up at him, the feeling of his chest against part of her back was comforting, “what?”
Adrien gulped and shifted slightly, “I uh, I ran away from home to join the military then… Shiganshina happened.”
“And you chose here?” Chloe asked in disgust, Adrien frowning at her in annoyance. “How ridiculous. Well, you seem to have made an…” she looked around in distain, “odd group of friends, especially this broken little doll here.” She said with a sly smirk, leaning towards Marinette who just glared at her, Adrien’s hand gripping onto Marinette’s shirt slightly.
“Can you just go away, Chloe.” Marinette spoke up, frowning at her, anger filling her body. She was no little doll, and she wasn’t broken. “And I am no doll.” She glared at her, her blue eyes darkening and narrowing as she felt her body fill with power.
“Oh no…” Alya whispered, her eyes wide as she gripped the edge of the table.
Chloe looked a little taken aback but brushed it off quickly, throwing her head back and laughing, “Ooh, someone is a brave one!” She leant over, her face inches from Marinette’s who didn’t even flinch, her face dark and her patience wearing thin.
“Marinette… don’t.” Alya warned in a hiss, Adrien looked at her, his brows furrowed in confusion. Marinette’s face changed suddenly, becoming completely emotionless as she stared up at Chloe from under her eyelashes. “Marinette…”
“So, tell me, how did you get your scar, little doll.” Chloe smirked, her eyes narrowing.
“From a titan.” She replied in a calm voice, whispers starting around them, she hadn’t even realised that everyone was watching them, the room uncomfortably quiet. “How did you get yours?” Marinette asked with a tilt of her head as Alya dropped her head into her hand with a groan, shaking her head. Nino and Adrien looking at her in confusion before looking back at the girls.
Chloe frowned and looked confused by the question, “What? I don’t have a-” before she could finish her sentence, at lightning speed Marinette headbutted Chloe who screamed and fell back, hands going to her face. Adrien held his hands up as it happened, moving back slightly to give Marinette room.
Marinette just stared at her, as she screamed and cried on the floor, blood dripping onto the dirty floors, expressionless and completely unphased. The boys stared at her in complete shock, Adrien’s eyes wide and their jaws slack. They stared at her like she had grown another head, they really weren’t expecting that to happen.
Marinette wiped whatever was on her forehead off on her sleeve as if nothing had happened and picked up her plate and mug. Alya lifted her head with a frown and did the same. The room was silent, Chloe’s crying on the floor as she cradled her broken, bleeding nose, whinging out a few words that sounded like “ridiculous” every now and then. Everyone watched Marinette as she stood up, stepped over Chloe and walked to put her plates down in the kitchen to be washed calmly, Alya following close behind with hunched shoulders and a bitter expression.
She exited the kitchen and looked around, everyone was looking at her in complete awe still, it made her feel extremely uncomfortable but she still showed nothing on her face. She waved to Nino and Adrien goodnight before the girls walked out, Adrien and Nino watching them go with heir mouths hanging open still, Adrien’s handheld up in a wave goodbye.
“Did you have to do that?” Alya asked with a small laugh, looking up at the stars above them as they walked back to the girls courters.
“No, but she pissed me off. So, I did.” Marinette said plainly, looking up as well as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Maybe now she won’t call me Scarface.”
“I think you just pissed her off more than anything.” Alya laughed, tucking her hands in her pockets. “Still, I’m impressed. Nora’s lessons seem to have paid off.”
Marinette smiled her crooked smile, looking over at Alya, “seems like it.” Alya smiled back at her before she grinned maliciously, hiking up her skirt.
“Race you!” Alya said before taking off running, Marinette gasped before grinning as well, the familiar tug on her mouth feeling good for once, hiking up her own skirt and taking off after Alya. Their laughter filled the air, Marinette letting her hands go up in the air as she got there first, laughing with all her heart. She stopped herself on the railing on the stairs, panting between laughs.
“Yes! And Dupain-Cheng has taken the win!” She cheered, punching a fist in the air mid jump, grinning fully. Alya was bent over, laughing as she panted, waving her hand at Marinette dismissingly.
Marinette laughed and looked back towards where they had come from and saw Adrien watching her, a smile on his face. She blinked as she tried to catch her breath, tucking her hair behind her ear again as she blushed, watching him for a moment, her smile dropping back to her normal small smile as she realised he had seen her crooked smile.
“He likes you.” Alya interrupted her thoughts, Marinette looking back at her.
“What? Don’t be ridiculous.” Marinette said with a raised brow, turning and starting up the stairs, shaking her head.
“Ridiculous? Marinette, are you blind?” She asked with a snort, skipping up the steps two at a time and pushing the door open to their courters. There was one girl curled up in bed already, but other than that they were alone in their shared room. “That boy looks at you like you can do no wrong.” Alya flung back onto the bed below her hard bed, frowning and punching the mattress.
“You are looking too much into it, Alya.” Marinette sat on the bed below her own bunk next to Alya’s, bending down and undoing her boots. “The last time he saw me I was eleven, I was a kid.”
“And now you’re not a kid anymore, you’re thirteen now.” Alya joked, lifting her head and wiggling her eyebrows at Marinette who blushed and looked away. “Work those new hips, hell, you even grew a bit!” Marinette frowned at her, “I knew you at eleven, you have changed.” Alya smirked and rolled off the bed. “Oh, come on! How do you not see it?”
“Because there is nothing to see!” Marinette exclaimed, standing up and placing her boots in her wooden locker. “He probably just feels a bit protective of me because of what we went through together.” Marinette looked back at her best friend, letting a laugh out at Alya’s flabbergasted face.
“A little?” Alya sat straight up, pushing her boots off with the end toes. “I swear the look that boy had when she-witch started on you, I thought he was gonna headbutt her himself.” She started undoing her vest and snorted, “then you went and did it yourself.”
Marinette couldn’t help but chuckle at that, “it was kind of funny.” She said as she pulled her shirt off, standing in her plain cream bra. She put the shirt away and pulled out her night dress. Alya laughing away behind her as she got out of her own clothes. “She got in my face, it’s not my fault.” She said as she wriggled out of her skirt and bra, pulling the pink dress on.
“Exactly, but, I mean, you don’t exactly look like the kind of person who goes around headbutting people.” Alya pointed out as she pulled on her dark brown dress. Marinette shrugged at that, if people didn’t suspect she could headbutt them because of her size then that is their problem really.
“Well, if they underestimate me then it’s their problem,” She said, climbing up onto the top bunk, slipping into the hard bed, rolling over and watching Alya slip into the top bunk next to her. “Besides, I was only making a first impression.” She said with an evil grin.
Alya laughed and rolled her eyes, “girl, they have no idea what they are messing with when it comes to you.” She joked, looking over with golden eyes. “And they better watch out, I don’t need to protect you, you got that down.”
Marinette giggled and snuggled in, the girls’ chatter filling the air as they entered. “Goodnight Alya,” she said, “I can’t believe we are really here.”
“I know… Let’s hope it’s worth something. Night, girl.”
oOo
“What the fuck do you call that? Are you even fucking trying, cadet?” The commandant screamed at a boy named Ivan who hung upside down from his ODM gear, whining slightly and kicking his legs about.
Marinette watched from her own area as her nerves were getting the best of her. She was up soon. Adrien had passed with flying colours which wasn’t surprising, the past week he had excelled in almost everything, and so he was standing to help the others, smiling kindly to everyone. Alya stood in front of her, silent for once, her hands trembling slightly.
It had been a week already and all of their bodies ached from the harsh physical training the commandant put them through. Marinette was sure he got a kick out of making them throw up from physical exertion. Alya was suffering more than Marinette currently, she was sore and, to top it off, she was missing home. A double whammy for her. She had spent the night in Marinette’s bed, crying and clinging to her best friend. She knew what was coming today, the omni-mobility directional gear test. They were both nervous, they had heard stories from Adrien that if you didn’t pass it over the week then you get sent home, most likely to work in the fields.
They wore straps all over their body, starting from the soles of their feet, going up their legs connecting to their red sash around their waist which was attached to a belt, which then connected to the harness strapped over their lower back, connecting to the padded straps going over their shoulders with a strap across their chest. They were made to keep their bodies in the air with full body motion while using their gear. It was effective but needed extreme training to be used to its full potential. That was why the training was three years. The level of fitness they needed to use it effectively intimated Marinette, she was small and light which would be an advantage to her but the muscle strength she would need to build up would take a while, and she was scared she wasn’t strong enough.
She looked over at Adrien who was smiling happily, cheering on the girl who was currently strapped in, she knew he would be fine, he was incredibly strong and had a huge advantage from living with the scouts all this time. She wished she had done more training with Alya’s sister after she had recovered, it would have helped today.
“Césaire! I’m watching you today!” The commandant yelled as he stalked over, his sunken eyes staring her down with a scowl on his face, Alya jumped and trembled more under his gaze. Soon he was standing there watching, Adrien shuffling slightly, glancing at Marinette who shrugged. “Are you going to mess this up just like you did in the run yesterday?”
“No sir!” Alya stepped forward, gulping as she was being strapped to the stable build. It was a three wooden pole structure with the wires hanging in the middle connected to a crank, they were required to be able to stay stable easily off the ground, hanging there with control. Many had failed already, not being able to stable themselves and in turn got screamed at by the commandant and degraded in front of their peers. Alya was now strapped in, facing the commandant who was glaring. Adrien started on the crank, lifting her up, her feet leaving the ground slowly. She wobbled, squeaks leaving her mouth as she struggled to stay up, her mouth screwed up and her eyes wide.
“Go Alya! You got this!” Nino cheered behind Marinette, throwing a fist in the air.
Alya struggled but soon was hanging, her body eventually relaxing and a wide smile appeared on her face, looking at Marinette for confidence who gave her a thumbs up. They had to hang there for a few minutes before getting off. Nino cheered and slung an arm over Marinette’s shoulders, leaning down from next to her, “you got this too.” He whispered with a smile, he knew how nervous she was so she smiled small and nodded. Over the past week the four of them had become close, Marinette finding a level of trust in Nino like she did in an older sibling, it was calming.
“You think?” She asked softly, looking up at Nino.
“Oh yeah, dudette, you have this down! It’s just about getting used to it.” He smiled confidently, he had already passed, looking almost bored when he hung there, even when the commandant screamed at him to wake up.
Alya was soon unstrapped and skipped over to them, beaming from ear to ear. The Commandant nodded and looked to the side, eyes narrowing as he glared, “Priss! What the fuck is that form?” He said before storming off to the next victim.
Adrien watched the Commandant leave with a raised brow and a slight frown, then turned to Marinette and grinned as she walked towards him. “M’lady.” His confidence with her had grown over the past few days, coming up with a nickname for her and showing a side of him that was very playful and sarcastic. She chuckled softly whenever it showed up, smiling with a tilt of her head as he held out his hand. She eyed it but felt eyes on her so she kept her complexion again and low fived his hand instead. She stepped forward and was strapped to the device. “Good luck.” He whispered before he moved eyes, their eyes meeting before he started the crank.
Marinette took a deep breath and closed her eyes briefly. She felt her feet lift the floor and she clenched her body. Her muscles started working, muscles she never thought existed as she swayed and almost fell backwards, a squeak falling from her lips as her eyes flew open, her hands going out to the sides as she tried to stabilise.
“Mari!” Adrien called out. She felt more eyes watching her, causing the commandant to turn his death stare on her. Shit! Don’t come over here!
“I’m fine, Agreste!” She called out, determination all over her face, her muscles tightening and she caught herself at the last second. She felt the straps pull on her body, adjusting to the feel. She gasped softly, she felt strong up there, feeling power flow through all the limbs. She looked up, relaxing her limbs as she felt the tug against the soles of her feet at the change of the position. She closed her eyes and let her body hang, enjoying the wind blowing through her hair. She got used to the feel of it and suddenly it was easy. She took a deep breath, opening her eyes to meet the commandant. Her look of confidence falling as her eyes widened.
“Dupain-Cheng, feeling comfy up there?” He asked, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring at her.
“Yes sir!” She cried out, gulping and straightening slightly.
“No surprises this time?” He stepped forward, raising a brow.
“No, sir!” She called out, sweat starting on the back of her neck.
“Good, now keep your fucking eyes open and focus!” He screamed, making her flinch and call out another yes sir. She expected him to walk away but he watched her, his dark, empty eyes watching every movement she made, she gulped and glanced at Adrien who was frowning. He gave her an encouraging thumbs up before looking back over at the commandant.
The commandant watched her for a few minutes before finally moving on, Marinette letting out a sigh in relief as she relaxed. She was slowly lowered, feeling the hard surface under her boots. Adrien ran to her side, “damn, what is his deal?” He whispered, frowning as he fiddled with the clips on Marinette’s waist. “I swear he gets angrier by the day.” Adrien looked over at the Commandant who had a recruit almost in tears, holding him upside down by the ankle, screaming in his face.
“Shush, he might hear you.” She warned, smacking his arm, frowning at him, looking anxiously back at the commandant in fear he had heard Adrien. The last person to say something like that ended up running until the sun set with a bag full of rocks, and they had found him passed out on the field the next morning. She didn’t want to be punished, especially with how her body was feeling.
“Ow! Alright!” He frowned and pouted a little at her, “it’s just he never lays off.” Adrien sighed, starting on the second clip.
“He’s our Commandant, he does it for a reason. You of all people know what the titans are like. They are going to be a lot worse when they are trying to eat us.” She whispered, frowning at how casual he was about it. “Watch how loud you say that stuff, we don’t need more punishments.” She hissed as she looked up at him, their eyes locking as his hand brushed her waist. She felt the clip fall away as they stood there in silence, frowning at each other, inches between them as Adrien looked down at her with furrowed brows.
Someone cleared their throat and they both blinked, stepping away from each other, Marinette powerwalking back to Alya who was smirking at her, her arms folded across her chest as she wiggled her eyebrows. “Don’t.” Marinette warned as she stood next to Alya, turning and looking away when Adrien glanced at them, a blush covering her cheeks.
“Wanna talk about what that was?” Alya nudged her. “Lovers quarrel?”
“We aren’t lovers, stop that.” She frowned, blushing brightly, “I don’t get how he can be so casual about stuff, we both went through hell, we know what is out there, yet he can complain about the commandant when he is right over there. Not everyone is as fit as he is.” She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest, hearing the commandant screaming at another person in the background. Marinette knew she could be a little serious a lot of the time but she didn’t want to get in trouble or get on the bad side of the commandant because of someone else.
“Girl, you are too serious at times!” Alya nudged her while laughing, “lighten up!”
“Alya’s right, dudette!” Nino piped up, walking over and resting his arm on Alya’s shoulder, smiling lazily down at them. “You are way too grown up for someone so small, you just gotta take it one step at a time!” He gave her a toothy grin, Marinette’s frown falling. “And with Adrien, I think he’s just a confident dude, he did spend the last year and a half with the scouts.” Nino shrugged, “he can do most of this stuff with his eyes closed.”
“Yeah… Lucky for some.” Marinette muttered looking back at Adrien who wasn’t smiling anymore, instead watching the other cadets closely as they hung. “He is very confident, isn’t he?”
“He seems to be more confident around you, to be honest” Nino said before he stretched his arms up, everything about him screamed relaxed and laid back, Marinette was jealous of it. “It’s like you’re his lucky charm.”
Marinette rolled her eyes and huffed, she knew they were right but she wasn’t in the wrong for taking this seriously, she looked away, her expression darkening. A flash of that big smile made her flinch, chewing her lip gently, her fringe falling over her eyes as she closed them. She knew what was out there, she knew the threat so she wouldn’t apologise for how serious she was. Another flash of a boulder crushing someone in front of her, blood everywhere. She opened her eyes and stared at the floor, her arms that were crossed over her chest were now hugging herself gently, her hand lifting and tracing her scar. She didn’t care if he could act so nonchalant, she wouldn’t act like that.
“I won’t apologise for being serious.” She said softly, Alya and Nino watching her, a worried look on Alya’s face. “I watched people die, I was almost eaten by a titan and I almost died running for my life. So, I won’t apologise for taking this seriously so I stay alive.” She looked over at them, “so if he gets us in trouble by opening that sarcastic mouth of his then I won’t be very ‘chill’.”
“It’s okay, girl, you don’t need to explain it to us. If he does, I’ll kick his ass for you.” Alya joked, Marinette smiling small and chuckling softly. “Now, come on, lets focus on the lesson.”
oOo
“Leave the horses! Release ODM gear! Now!” Plagg screamed, jumping onto the horses back, releasing his wire and flinging himself towards the wall, the rest of the soldiers following suit. Adrien growled as he hit the wall, running up it and sending his wires further up. He had to get up there, the bodies at the base of the wall had garrison uniform, a lot of them his former classmates. It was happening again, how was it happening again, it had been five years, how was this happening again!?
He flung himself up and skidded onto the top of the wall, Marinette landing next to him gracefully, her face thunder, her blades drawn. Soon all of the scouts were on top of the wall, looking over the titan infested town. Adrien gasped and widened his eyes. There were dead bodies everywhere, giant boulders littered throughout the town and so many buildings were destroyed. They had taken too long to get here. He looked over and saw soldiers littered on rooftops, they must mostly be the cadets.
“Shit!” He heard Marinette curse, gripping her blades tighter. “They’ve run out of gas!” She called out, “The supply building is overrun!” She pointed to the castle like building, at least 6 titans climbing on it or around it. “That must be why they are not moving from the rooftops! If they had gas the safest place for them would be on the walls!”
“You’re right, shit,” Plagg cursed, “okay, clear the area as best you can! And none of you fucking die! That’s an order! We didn’t mostly survive outside the wall to die in our city!” He called before he dived off the wall.
Marinette looked over and nodded at Adrien, he frowned as he noticed her face was blurry, what was wrong with his eyes? He blinked, watching as the 17 year old girl change between blinks, shrinking down to the small girl he knew 5 years ago. Her strong, developed body now a small skinny, frail body, her short pigtails now her long black curtains. “What…” He gasped, staggering back as she frowned at him, dropping her blades slightly.
“Adrien?” Her voice was higher pitched, softer, and she had no scar. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
Adrien tripped and fell back, dropping his blades as they clattered on the stone, “M-Mari?” She blinked and walked over to him, kneeling down and placing a hand on his forehead, her soft, small hand feeling so foreign compared to her calloused hand he knew. She was so small, her long hair framing her face.
He cried out and scrambled back as suddenly her cheek started tearing open, a long wound opening where her scar is, but she wasn’t reacting, she just crouched there, watching him with empty eyes. Blood dripped to the floor, he watched it splatter in slow motion and suddenly he was falling. Marinette above him, he cried out and went to grab his gear but it was gone, he reached out for Marinette, he had to make sure she made it. “Marinette!” he cried out before something grabbed him, knocking the breath from his lungs.
He gasped and watched as Marinette fell straight into a Titans mouth, this titan was crouched on its haunches, blonde hair and an ugly face, bright blue eyes that looked evil and a mouth full of jagged, sharp teeth. The 17 year old Marinette now hanging half out of the jaw, staring at him with wide eyes, her ribbons falling from her hair. Adrien blinked before he screamed out, desperately reaching for her and fighting against the titan that had hold of him, tears streaming down his face.
He was pulled away and came face to face with the titan who had long black hair, no lips just teeth, a determined expression and piercing green eyes. He was glaring at Adrien, a first for him, seeing a titan with emotion besides hunger. The titan was at least 15 metres and had an extremely muscled body.
Why wasn’t he eating Adrien? What was going on?
“Wake up!” He heard a deep, rumbling voice from the titan, “wake up, Adrien! Remember what he did! Wake up!”
Adrien cried out and sat straight up in his sleeping bag, he was covered in sweat, his hair soaked and his shirt sticking to him. He was breathing heavily and shaking. What the hell was that?
“Adrien?” He gasped and looked to the side, meeting Marinette’s tired eyes. She was in her white long sleeve shirt and her white trousers, her messy hair down falling over her shoulders. It had grown over the few months since they had begun training, she constantly complained about it. “What’s wrong? Did you have a bad dream?” She asked, crawling over to him and sitting on his sleeping bag, avoiding the cold grass.
They were camped out on exercise in the Giant Forest deep within Wall Rose, it had been a long gruelling day training with their ODM gear and everyone was exhausted, their squad consisted of Nino, Alya, Marinette, Kim, Juleka, Luka, Alix and Rose. They were all asleep under the stars, spread out over their area, the embers still burning from their fire from hours before.
He gulped and tried to calm his breathing, nodding at her question. He pushed himself up to a more comfortable position and buried his face in his shaking hands, rubbing his face to wake himself up more. He felt a hand on his back, the feeling calming him.
“Y-yeah… It was… it was weird.” He whispered, moving his hands from his face and staring down at his calloused skin.
“Tell me about it.” She whispered, placing a hand over his, his eyes whipping up and meeting hers. He must have woken her up, “I find it helps when I talk about my nightmares, Alya says it helps take back control of a place that you had no control of.” She spoke softly, softer than her now more serious tone she had developed over the past few months. These moments were only for her close friends he had noticed.
He took a deep breath, examining her face. The dream flooding back with a gasp. “I saw… You.” She blinked, “but you were older, a little taller, you were… in a scouts uniform.” She frowned, “but that’s not the main thing, the titans had breached the wall and were in Trost. I got to the top of the wall and I saw you. And Plagg.” He looked away, “Everyone was dead, titans were everywhere.” He dropped his hands to the floor and clenched them, gripping the rough material of his sleeping bag, “you were staring at me and then… you changed… to 2 years ago.” She tilted her head, “you were so small, and… your scar just appeared but it was like you were being cut open and then…” He froze, his eyes widening as he remembered the titans. “There were titans…”
“You said they had infested Trost? So, I’m not surprised.” She whispered gently, bringing her knees to her chest and hugging them.
“They were different.” His voice shook slightly, “I… you were… eaten by one that I had never heard of, it’s nothing they have told us about in lectures. I saw you, the older you, being eaten. The titan was like a wild animal, it seemed to watch me, it seemed like it was… excited to eat you.” He gulped, “And I was grabbed by one…” He remembered looking at the titan, it seemed so familiar. “It told me to wake up and-“ he gasped, looking at her, “he told me to remember something.” He hissed, rubbing a hand over his mouth. “It felt so real.”
Marinette watched him worriedly before she laid a hand on his cheek, making him look at her, “hey, it was just a dream. The titans won’t get into Trost, and I have no ambition to get eaten, so don’t worry.” She smiled small, her tired eyes crinkling at the corners in a way that always made his heart jump. “And with those titans, we have been going through a lot of training and learnt a lot about the titans that we never knew over the past six months.” She smiled wider, one of her now rare smiles, making his heart jump even more and his eyes widen, “it’s just a dream, it’s not reality, so don’t worry, okay?”
Adrien looked at her with parted lips, thinking over her words before he gulped, his Adams apple bobbing, “yeah… you’re right.” He said looking back down at his hands, “it just… felt so real. Plagg was there.”
“Your brother?” She asked softly.
“Yeah, no one knows though so don’t say anything.” He said in a panic, looking around.
“I know, I haven’t said anything.” She replied, “Tikki told me in a letter about it.” Adrien blinked at her, “your secret is safe with me.”
He smiled, “thank you.” He said before taking a deep breath, “also thank you… for helping calm me down, I’m okay now.” He said, meeting her eyes.
She smiled and nodded, “no worries,” she said before she started to get back up. Adrien panicked and grabbed her arm gently, causing her to gasp and look back at him.
“Could… I’m sorry, I just… could you lie with me for a bit.” He asked softly, his eyes begging her softly.
Marinette looked at him in surprise before gulping and nodding, “okay, just for a bit though, okay?” She said before she crawled over, he instinctively opened the sleeping bag, surprising her. She took a deep breath and slipped in, lying on her side and facing him as he lay down, their faces inches from each other. “I’m here.” She whispered with a small smile.
“Thank you,” he whispered, looking into her eyes before he looked down at her scar, remembering his dream. He knew not to try touch her scar, someone had tried to a month before and she broke their arm in return, shocking everyone but her three friends, they had seen how tough she was. It honestly impressed Adrien, she was so small but so strong. “Can you promise me something?” He asked softly, meeting her eyes again.
“Depends.” She replied, making him chuckle at her usual seriousness.
“Just, promise me, if things get bad in the future you will make sure you survive.” He whispered, feeling her hand brush against him.
“What?” She frowned, “you know I can’t promise that.”
“You can though, no matter the situation, just… just try to survive, no matter what.”
She stared at him with a frown before she chewed her lip, “I will promise to do my best to survive, okay?”
He sighed in relief, his eyelids heavy, “okay. Thank you.” He replied with a smile.
They spoke for the next half hour before they both fell asleep, Adrien resting his cheek on Marinette’s head as she rested it on his shoulder unknowingly.
oOo
“Agreste!” Marinette heard someone yell, turning her attention to the trees in the distance in front and Nino, what was going on now. They had been out in the forest now for a week and tensions were high, they had slept on the hard floor and had hunted their own food. As of today, their supplies were running low and they all could use a nice shower, all of them now used to the smell of sweat and BO from each other. It had been a long week but this was their training. It was meant to make them bond, and it was working… For some people that was. “What the hell was that?”
Their squad was split up currently throughout the forest in pairs, Marinette was paired with Nino, Alya with Rose, Alix with Kim and Adrien with Luka. So far the pairs were working for the most part. Well, two pairs were anyway. They had been awake for over twenty four hours now as their training mission had gone on longer as no one had completed it, so everyone was on edge, some taking it harder than others. Nino and she had been working brilliantly together, they had found three of the hidden Titan props just that day and were confident in their abilities when slicing the napes. The only thing stopping their progress was the constant bickering echoing through the forest. If it wasn’t Kim winding up Alix over a competition it was Adrien and Luka surprisingly butting heads.
“Oh no, what now?” Nino groaned, turning to Marinette who was so done with all of the fighting currently that she was ready to abandon them in the giant trees and go find Alya with Nino. She was at her wits ends with the boys in the squad, well besides Nino who had stayed his normal calm self. The boys had seemed to have some pissing competition on who can piss her off the most today. Too much testosterone probably. Fucking boys. “Come on, let’s go see what’s going on.” He said before he flew into the air, Marinette sighing and releasing a wire, flying forward between the trees, her hair blowing backwards, and soon landing on a large branch, looking forward and seeing Adrien and Luka in each other’s faces. Again.
She sighed and curled her lip up in distain, she got that the titan props were really hard to find and you were being graded individually despite the pairings, but if you worked together you could even them out and each still earn good grades. So, this behaviour wasn’t accepted in her books. With clenched fists she looked at the pathetic show of masculinity in front of her.
“What? I took a shot, that’s what we are meant to do!” Adrien argued, frowning at the older boy. Luka was taller than Adrien, and bigger, but he was a gentle soul who rarely got angry or seemed threatening. So, seeing him like this, his face thunder, his blue eyes full of rage with black bags under them and his teeth gritting together was a weird sight. Even seeing Adrien so angry was odd, his hair was a mess, and his green eyes were narrowed, a scowl on his face, almost like when a child had a tantrum, but in this case the children had flesh slicing blades. Nino just rolled his eyes and let out a groan.
“You jumped in front of me! I could have hit you!” Luka replied through gritted teeth, his knuckles white as he gripped onto the handle of his blades tighter.
“Well, you should look around before jumping into action then.” Adrien frowned and sheathed his blades into the heavy metal carriers on his waist.
Marinette rolled her eyes and jumped over to the branch, stepping in the middle as Nino pulled Adrien aside. She turned and looked up at Luka with a hand on his chest, frowning at him, “Luka, come on, this is ridiculous now. We need to stay calm. We can’t be fighting over every single prop we find!” She said firmly, Luka’s expression softening as he looked down at her. “We are all tired, okay?” She turned and saw Adrien glaring at them, Nino talking to him in hushed tones while glancing back at Marinette. “Adrien, calm down!” She scolded, “if the commandant saw this you two would be stuck out here just the two of you for another week to hash it out like dogs!”
Adrien huffed and shook off Nino, “sorry.” He muttered, looking away with a frown. Marinette eyed him, he did look very out of it today. She wondered if he had those nightmares again.
“It’s fine, let’s just get today over with, dude.” Nino replied, rubbing his shoulder. “My body needs a bath, even if I have to jump in the river, I don’t care, my body is beaten.” He moaned with a sigh.
“You need to be more careful, Adrien. It isn’t safe jumping out like that, it’s reckless.” Luka reprimanded, his older, wiser voice back to its calm self.
Adrien looked over at him before he shrugged, “sorry, I just want this day to be over.” He said with a sigh, looking over at Marinette with apologetic eyes. She swore if he had comedic animal ears, they would be drooping.
“We all do, dude, but you guys need to be chill, like dudette and me!” Nino said cheerfully, looking over at Marinette who nodded.
“Are you two going to work together or do we need to switch partners?” Marinette asked, looking between the teen boys. “Because I will hit the next person who pisses me off!” She threatened before they all froze, all of their eyes turning to the south as they heard someone coming on ODM gear, she heard it before she felt the boot to her chest, kicking her off the branch at high speed, the impact sending her spinning as she fell. She screamed as she started falling, they were 35 feet up, a fall from that high and she would be dead. Shit! Get control!
She swivelled her body to face up and release a wire but couldn’t make out a target without accidentally hitting someone. She heard the boys screaming her name but it was getting further and further. She looked down and saw a branch approaching, bracing for a hard impact but instead a solid body hit her from the side, knocking the wind from her lungs. She wrapped her arms around their arm as she was suddenly going back up, the forest whizzing around her. Before she knew it she hit solid wood and rolled on the large branch, skidding to a halt when she hit the tree, coughing as she did. She looked up and saw Nino crouched in front of her, blades drawn and his face twisted in anger, his lazy side gone in an instant.
“Not fucking cool, Chloe! You can fuck off too, Lila!” He yelled, slamming his blades together as a threat.
Marinette pushed up, coughing again as two bodies joined them on the new branch, Adrien at her side in seconds, skidding on his knees to her side and allowing her to rest against his shoulder as she hunched over in pain.
“What the fuck was that?” Luka asked as he looked around, his own blades drawn, glancing at Marinette with wide eyes.
“Fucking Chloe and Lila. We bumped into them earlier and took their titans, they were not pleased.” Nino growled, his golden eyes scanning for any possible threats. “Those bitches, Marinette, you okay?” He called back.
She coughed, “yeah… Give me a minute.” She answered, her hands clasped over her right side of her chest, a muddy footprint outlined on her jacket and shirt. “Son of a bitch.” She growled, Adrien rubbing her back gently, not saying a word.
“Next time you make some enemies, can it not be the two crazy chicks in our regiment, Marinette?” Luka called out with a frown, lowering his blades.
“Sorry.” She wheezed out, leaning back against the trunk behind her, shimmying her arm out of her jacket with Adrien’s help.
“Shit, she got you good.” He whispered as he gently pulled it off her arm, frowning as he saw some blood on her shirt. “I’ve gotta clean wherever she’s cut you, she must have gone down to the ground and got mud on her shoes on purpose, who knows what else was on that shoe.” He said, looking at her face. She nodded, wincing at the pain.
“With my luck she managed to find some horse crap or something.” She said before she coughed again, damn, she really did get her good. Adrien frowned as he examined her face with his worried green eyes, rubbing her back again. “Who knew getting kicked in the chest would hurt so much.” She joked, the boys looking over at her and chuckling, all besides Adrien. He reached over and undid the strap across her chest, starting to undo her shirt, Nino looking away as usual, not phased anymore, but it was Luka who blinked and went red.
“What the hell are you doing?” He questioned, turning away as Marinette’s skin was starting to show. All three of them looked at him in surprise. Marinette blinked and looked down, was he… embarrassed? She would have expected it at the beginning of their training but they were halfway through their first year, most of them had showered in their underwear together during a mission or at least gone swimming in a river three months ago when they were out in the field. They had got used to patching people up as well, hell just two months ago while on a training mission a cadet slipped off a branch above Marinette and cut her back in some dumb luck, Adrien was at her side in seconds like usual. He had patched her up, chatting away like his usual cheerful self as she sat in a bra, letting him chat away like an excited kitten. The cut on her back wasn’t serious enough to stop her training, but it was enough to bug her for a month.
“I’m patching her up?” Adrien said in confusion, his finger stopping on the third button, staring at the dark haired boy. “Wait, you have… done first aid on someone before, right?” He questioned with a chiding laugh. “Because if you need the practice…”
“Yes I have!” He snapped, “But not… on…” Luka trailed off with a gulp.
“A girl?” Marinette finished with a raised brow. Luka nodding, “how is that possible?” She asked with a wince as Adrien went back to back on undoing her shirt carefully, glancing over at his green eyes that were focused on the task at hand.
“I didn’t have any girls get injured around me… in that area,” he replied calmly, his back to them all. “It’s not that big a deal, okay?”
Nino shrugged, “don’t worry, after a while you get used to it,” he reassured him, sheathing his blades and sitting on the edge of the branch, swinging his legs. “Besides, the girls don’t care anymore, so chillax.” He said before stretching his arms out above him with a yawn.
Luka huffed before sitting down with his back to them, his knees bent in front of him. “are you okay, Marinette?”
Marinette had her shirt open now, her grey sports bra showing, brown stains forming from the mud. She had a few punctured from maybe some stones stuck in Chloe’s boot, but nothing serious, Adrien was cleaning her off gently, his fingers brushing against her soft skin. “Yeah, I’m okay. I can breathe again thankfully. She’s in the other squad, so why the hell is she all the way out here? Surely they didn’t come looking for us?” She asked before lifting her arm at Adrien’s instruction.
Nino looked around before looking back at Marinette, “they are crazy, remember. Once you’re all patched up I think we just finish the mission so we can get back.” He said, “I don’t like how confident they are in the trees.” He frowned and looked around again.
“It was a very bold move on her part.” Adrien spoke up, pulling Marinette’s bra strap to the side to stick a plaster over the one puncture wound, “it could have ended a lot more badly, if Nino hadn’t caught you…” He trailed off, the other two boys staying silent too.
“Don’t worry, let’s just get this mission done. I want my bed.” She replied, dropping her head back against the tree.
Soon they were on their feet again, Marinette’s shirt buttoned up and she was rolling her shoulder, the pain in her chest now more muscular than anything. She looked around the forest and turned to Nino, “okay, Nino, get the map out.” She said walking over to him, Luka and Adrien were pouting at each other in defiance behind them, not saying a word to each other.
Nino pulled out the map they had been given and they started strategizing their next move, deciding on a route and Marinette looked back at the two boys and sighed.
“Okay, seriously, stop with the dick measuring!” She called over, placing a hand on her hip and frowning at them.
“We aren’t-” Adrien started to protest.
“She’s right, dude.” Nino interrupted, he rubbed his black bagged eyes and frowned, “Mari, I will take Luka, you go with Adrien, let’s just get this done.” He was getting frustrated, she could tell. Probably that they had to split up as partner more than the other boys causing problems.
“What? Why?” Luka protested with a frown, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I’m fine with that.” Adrien said with a cocky smile, looking over at Marinette who watched them all with annoyed eyes. Luka turned and glared at Adrien, pouting slightly.
“Whatever, come on Adrien.” Marinette said, placing a hand on Nino’s arm and smiling apologetically, who responded with the same look. Dammit! Her best partner to date and she had lost him. Well, she was yet to be partner’s with Adrien so let’s see how it goes.
“Okay, I will see you guys back at camp. Look out for crazy bitches.” Nino said before he called for Luka, flying off to the east together.
Marinette turned to Adrien who was looking sheepish now, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring at him.
“I can explain.” He said, holding his hands up in surrender. “I got carried away, and I’m sorry!” He squeaked as Marinette walked towards him, her eyes dark. “M-Mari?” He blinked. She stood in front of him for a few seconds before she smacked his arm, “ow!” He cried out in protest, rubbing his arm and frowning at her.
“What the hell, Adrien!” She exclaimed, “why are you acting like Kim today of all days?” She questioned with a frown. “Best not to threaten the guy bigger than you who has blades, ya know!”
“Hey, I had blades too.” He pouted, crossing his arms over his chest.
“That isn’t the point, I know you are tired, but we all are, okay?” She said with a sigh, looking up at him. “I don’t want to have to save you constantly. You have a bad habit of getting in the way of danger.” Her face softened, thinking of him going the extra mile to help and save others the past six months during the ODM training.
He sighed and rubbed the back on his neck, “I’m sorry, M’lady.” He said before he chewed his lip, thinking for a moment before pulling out the map, “now, where to next?”
oOo
“Marinette!” Alya spotted her as her and Adrien landed a little way from the meeting point. They looked exhausted, a footprint standing out on the right side of her chest. Marinette had her usual annoyed expression on her face, dark black eyes as she started towards Alya and Nino, and Adrien was his usual excited puppy, a smile on his face as he waved at them happily, he had a bruise on his jaw and his hair was a shaggy mess.
Marinette lifted her eyes and spotted Alya, smiling an exhausted smile. Alya ran over to her and hugged her tight, Marinette yelping and curling her back slightly. “Ouch.” She winced.
“Oh, sorry, Nino told me what happened.” She said pulling away, walking with them as Nino and Adrien bumped fists.
“Calmed down now, dude?” He asked Adrien who laughed and nodded.
Alya turned and smacked Adrien on the arm, causing him to look at her flabbergasted, “Ow! Can you two stop hitting me today?” He exclaimed, rubbing his arm, looking at them in bewilderment.
“You were meant to protect her!” She growled, hugging her best friend close and glaring at Adrien.
“She was Nino’s partner!” He exclaimed, motioning to a laughing Nino. “Sorry I wasn’t on the watch for flying crazy girls!”
“I’m fine, Alya.” Marinette spoke up, poking the arm around her face. “Can you let go now?” She asked, Alya blinking and letting her go. “Doesn’t matter now, Nino had me. Now let’s go.” She said, rolling her shoulder again and walking to the others.
The commandant arrived minutes later, everyone jumping to their feet and coming to attention, their fists over their hearts.
“Well, look at you.” He started, “you all smell like shit.” He curled his lip in disgust, walking between them. “I have been watching you the past week, and I was not surprised by how disappointing you all are.” He glared at them all, eyes falling on Marinette, “some excelled, some were god damn awful, and some, well, some missed the point of the exercise all together! I will give you your grades tomorrow in lesson, understood?”
“Yes, sir!” They called out.
“Now, you all stink, you aren’t coming back to my base smelling like this. There is a lake east of here, wash up and then head back. I expect you all home by 2100hrs.” He said before he walked over to his horse, climbing on and looking back at them. “And, no more of your childish bickering! I saw enough to last me a lifetime this week!” He said before he galloped off.
They all relaxed and made their way to the horses grazing, this was only Marinette’s class which consisted of 2 squadrons. Marinette preferred it this way as she wasn’t used to the other class just yet. She made her way to her horse and climbed on, stroking his mane. Soon they were all heading to the lake, all excited to get clean. Marinette looked over the big green world around her, the orange sky making it all look so peaceful.
“Hey, Marinette!” Alya called, bringing her out of her daze, looking over at her friend. “Race you.” She grinned, Marinette grinning back before kicking the side of her horse, feeling the wind blow through her hair as they both charged forward, giggling in joy.
Not fifteen minutes later they arrived, hopping off their horses and tying them up. They both stood there with wide eyes, looking over the blue, sparkling lake.
“Wow…” Alya breathed before their serenity was interrupted by Adrien and Nino barrelling past them in their underwear, shoving each other and laughing before jumping into the lake, water splashing everywhere as the girls tried to avoid getting wet.
They both chuckled as others started jumping in, it was rare they had this kind of freedom to act like teenagers, so when it came, they took advantage. Marinette quickly discarded her ODM gear and started undoing her shirt, her body buzzing with excitement to relax in the water. She pulled it off and shoved it into the bag on her saddle, wriggling out of her white trouser until she was in just her grey sports bra and her black boy short underwear, unravelling the bandaged on her chest, leaving just the ones stuck to her on. Alya was next to her in the same but hers were black completely. Both of them took their hair down before they ran and jumped in, the boys splashing them as they came up.
Marinette laughed and went under again, enjoying the cold water on her aching body, her eyes closed as she felt her hair brushing against her skin as it floated about. This was bliss to her. She came back up and pushed her hair back, looking at her friends with a laugh. It was funny, just 6 months ago she was scared to show off her scar, now here she was, skin showing, and she didn’t care. It was amazing what confidence and trust in your comrades could do. She looked over and spotted Luka with his friends, Kim, Ivan and Alix. He seemed to be more relaxed which was good, he looked over and spotted her, smiling and waving at her. She waved back before she was splashed with water, her hair falling over her face.
She spun around and saw Alya grinning at her as she pushed her hair back again, laughing softly. It was like that for a while, but soon Marinette was floating on her back, staring up at the sky. The orange had started to turn pink, some stars shining through in defiance. It was beautiful. It was a place of peace.
“Hey.” She heard a voice say next to her, turning her head and spotting Adrien. He was standing next to her, his shoulders above the water. “How’s your chest?” He asked softly as she floated back to up right, she couldn’t stand so she had to tread water.
“A little sore but it feels a lot better now.” She replied, rubbing a hand over the now dark bruise over the right side of her chest, “I’ll live.” She joked, bobbing up and down.
“Good, just keep an eye on it, and be careful of Chloe and Lila, they really have it out for you.” He said worriedly before noticing she couldn’t stand, “here.” He said before holding his arm out for her to hold on to. She blinked before placing both her hands on his warm skin, using his arm to stay afloat better. “Better?”
“Yeah, thank you… And I’m not too worried about them, they will get theirs.” She said looking over at the girls who were whispering to each other, scowls on their faces. She knew they hated how close she was to Adrien, Lila countless times mentioning how she was a better friend for Adrien, Marinette knew they both had crushes on him too. Hell, most of the girls in the regiment did.
“Still, I don’t like having to keep patching you up,” he smiled sweetly at her, his brows creased slightly, “you have a habit of getting hurt, for someone who graceful in the air you sure are clumsy.”
She laughed softly at that, his cheeks going red when she did, “what can I say, I just have a clumsy side when I’m not in fight mode. Maybe I have two sides to me, like alter egos.” She joked, “I mean you have it, outside of training or when you aren’t with me you’re this sweet, can do no wrong guy, but put your uniform on and give you your weapons and this confident cocky side comes out.” She teased, poking his nose.
He blinked before he smirked and leant forward, “Is that so, M’lady? I haven’t heard you complain about it.”
She rolled her eyes and laughed, “see, there it is. You’re like… hmmm,” she thought, “you’re like a cat, one minute you’re nice, and the next you are ready to fight dirty.” She smirked as he raised a brow.
“Are you calling me a cat?” He asked in confusion.
“Hmm, yes, yes I am.” She said confidently, the water lapping at her neck. “I think I might just call you kitty from now on. Seeing as you have your nickname for me.” She smirked even more at her frown.
He frowned as he thought for a minute before he smiled brightly, “I love it! M’lady has a nickname and now so do I.” He leant in closer with a smirk, “quite the pair, aren’t we?” He wiggled his eyebrows at her while she frowned at him before she shoved his head under water playfully watching him come back up with his shaggy hair covering his eyes as he pouted, her laugh filling the air. “No fair!” She carried on laughing as he pushed his hair back into a mess, pouting at her before he tackled her, arms wrapping around her body as he pushed her under, pushing up on the ground and emerging with her over his shoulder on shallower ground, walking to Alya and Nino who were laughing at the scene in front of them.
Adrien grinning victoriously as Marinette smacked Adrien’s toned back to put her down, water from her hair over her eyes. He soon lifted her up again and placed her on his knee as he sat next to Nino, a smug look on his face. “I won.” He said, Marinette pouting at him with her arms across her chest, perching on his bent knee, blushing slightly at their bodies being so close. She looked over at her friends and felt peace, it had been a long six months, but… this made it all worth it. She was happy, and she belonged. She looked at Adrien who was watching her, she blinked and poked his nose again, smiling at him finally.
“Ease there, kitty.” She said softly, “don’t get too excited.” He blinked before smiling a sweet smile at her, making her heart skip a beat.
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mymelodyheart · 3 years
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Miles Between Us Chapter 5 ~The Tethered Ties~
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WARNING: VERY EXPLICIT SEXUAL & LANGUAGE CONTENT
PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE PROCEEDING
For this chapter, you might need to refresh your memory on the history of Harry's connection to the Fraser family and Murtagh, if so you can reread the chapter Who the Hell is Harry? from Series 1 (AIWFCIY). On this Tumblr link or on this AO3 link.
Previously in Reunited ...
"Are you working today?" 
He grinned. "No. I took a day off." And he'd arranged with Willie he wouldn't be starting work until ten tomorrow morning.
"Well, ..."
"Weel what?"
"I think I'd like to go to bed."
To bed?  He searched her face looking for any evidence indicating she was unwell or fatigued. After all, she'd been working a lot these past few days. But he found none. Instead, her eyes betrayed what she had in mind. Still, he could be mistaken and wanted to be sure. "To bed or to sleep?" he asked slowly and cautiously.
She stood on her tiptoes and brushed her lips against his, making his stomach flipped. "What do you think?" she whispered against his mouth.
There was an awareness on Claire's face that revealed she felt the wild rapping against his rib cage. Both of their breathing changed, and in an instant, the closeness of their bodies was no longer means to keep anxiety at bay.
His heart rate suddenly became an equivalent of a man running from a bull in Pamplona. "Ach, Sassenach, couldnae ye wait until we were nearer to home to tell me that?" 
If you wish to read this on AO3, here is the link.
If you wish to read this from the beginning:
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 Claire watched Jamie in her periphery as he slowed the car and rolled into the cottage's driveway. It started to rain heavily, a stark contrast to the sunnier weather that had greeted her in Inverness. But she was too preoccupied focusing on him to notice anything else. 
"It's nice to be back," she whispered, smothering a smile as she unfastened her seatbelt.
He grunted something incoherent. Claire could tell he was trying his hardest to keep himself together by the way his jaw ticked. Given she was operating on adrenaline ever since that kiss upon her arrival, she realised she shouldn't have teased him with that naughty innuendo before they'd left the airport. 
"I think I'd like to go to bed," she'd said. Jamie's expression had changed when he read the meaning in her eyes. She'd thought his reaction was adorable, but now, with her skin feeling too tight for her body, she understood his predicament. With two and a half weeks of sexual frustration swirling in the air between them, she suddenly felt sympathetic. She'd even gone as far as doing as she was told after he'd ordered her not to speak another word on their drive back to Broch Mordha, even when he drove above the speed limit. But the silence between them only served to intensify the atmosphere more. 
"We'll get yer bags later ..." He turned off the ignition and briefly glanced at her. "...when it stops raining."
Claire made a move to get out but was surprised at how quick Jamie clambered out of the car and skirted to her side. He opened the door, their eyes meeting when he offered his hand. Feeling the intensity of his regard, she allowed him to help her out and pull her towards the house, squealing when she was blasted by an icy torrent.
Once inside, he booted the cottage door shut behind him, shrugging his jacket off and shaking the rain from his hair, propelling driblets everywhere and making her laugh as she did the same. But her laughter was soon cut off by the low sound he made in his throat, his slow, deliberate advance, the muscular chest he exposed when he peeled off his sodden top. The wind pelted rain on the windows, thunder reverberating, lightning flashing and illuminating the semi-dark living room in irregular intervals.
She shivered, but she knew it wasn't from the cold. "Where's Rollo and Adso?" she asked, her bottom hitting the back of the sofa as she walked back.
He unbuckled his belt. "At Willie's. I wasnae sure if we were gonnae be out the whole day or no'."
When he dragged his zipper down, she hissed on a gasp, watching his shoes come off and jeans sloughing onto the floor in record time. She swallowed audibly. "Oh, so no distractions then," she squeaked. He didn't reply. Instead, he reached out to tug her top off. When his eyes landed on her white lacy bra, he swore harshly under his breath. "Perhaps some tea first, to warm us up?" she suggested, feeling shy all of a sudden, her arms coming up to cover herself. It was clear their time apart, though not really that long, made her a tad bit bashful.
"Tea?" he said in a low voice, his hands prying hers. "Dinnae fash, Sassenach ..." He unclasped her bra and let it drop to the floor. "I'll keep ye warm."
He undid her jeans and slid his hands inside to cup her buttocks, pulling her in and dipping his head forward to lock their mouths together, obliterating all thoughts and reason with each expert sensual slide of his tongue. He groaned into her mouth, and she could barely remain upright from the onslaught of feeling and need, an intoxicating, heart-stopping desire that made every part of her body scream. 
When they broke apart, she shakily toed off her shoes as he impatiently tugged at her waistband, sliding down her panties along to expose her most intimate part, glad she'd made time for a bit of body pampering. It was a decision she'd made on a whim, thanks to Annalise's cajoling to accompany her to the beauty salon. In all her life, she'd never once considered doing it since she'd always been the type to keep the 70s vibe alive in her pants. The loose string of curses he uttered and the shudder that passed through his body told her the pain, and the effort had not been in vain. "Ah, Christ, Sassenach, nae wonder ye're cold, ye're all bare down there." 
She didn't know whether to die of embarrassment, laugh, or hit him on the head for that remark. But those feelings were only fleeting when he shoved down his boxer briefs and fisted his heavy erection, his head dropping down to her neck to rain kisses on a sensitive spot he knew so well. "I don't want a condom between us, Sassenach," he said hoarsely. "I want ye to know I'm clean, and I'm serious about us. But if ye're not on a pill, I'll put one on for ye."
Her head lolled to the side, his hot breath on her skin making her breathless and unable to think straight. "It's alright. I'm on a pill. I want to feel all of ye. There's only been you ...you know that."
"Sweet, Jesus." With one swift motion, he lifted her, her legs automatically encircling around his waist. He crushed her against the wall, the force of it causing a hanging art to drop to the floor. Both of them vaguely noticed, only focused on getting as close to one another as possible. She palmed the wall behind her with one hand for balance as he lifted her higher to take her nipple into his mouth, tongue flicking and teasing at the sensitive bud, making her moan. She threw her head back and arched, her fingers tangling into his hair.
"C-can't wait. Please. Now. Jamie!" she commanded, clawing his back.
He hauled her from the wall and strode over to the sofa, almost toppling over Rollo's rope toy. Then he shoved the box seat with his knee, and a pile of books with his game consoles spilt onto the rug. 
His laughter blew out on a puff of warm breath, stirring strands of curls that rested on her cheek. "Sorry, Sassenach," he mumbled, carefully stepping over the scattered heaps. 
"Don't care ...just want you."
He dropped onto the sofa and eased her on his lap to straddle him. Every inch of her skin prickled and thrummed as his fingers traced the curves of her breasts and hips.
"Jesus, I've missed this ...us like this," he murmured into her ears. "Look at ye, so bloody beautiful, and ye're mine."
His words rang in her ears. She had to force herself to stop fidgeting as he skated his hands along her thighs to her backside, drawing her nearer to his hardness. She could feel the heat of his erection against the softness of her belly and his fingertips igniting her skin anywhere he touched. Her reserve vanished when he gently pulled her in for another deep kiss, their simultaneous moan rending the atmosphere and every neuron in her brain shorting out. 
She broke their kiss, gasping for air, and he stared at her with barely constrained desperation, lifting her by the waist as she held on to his shoulders. Guided by his strong hands, she slowly lowered herself onto his thick length, inch by inch, their mouths dropping open and exchanging breaths. When their bodies locked together like two halves of a whole, they stared at each other in wonderment, sharing a mutual appreciation of the fact that their lust-filled late-night phone conversations paled in comparison to the reality of blinding pleasure.
Unable to take her eyes away from his face - the face of a man who bore so much weight on his shoulders, she tightened her muscles around him, extracting a broken groan to pass his lips. She wanted to be the one who eased his burden, take away all his guilt and anxiety and rid him of his nightmares. He'd been through a lot and, while she had a vague idea of the extent of it, a man who's about honour and duty was good to the core. Looking at his tortured expression, an intense ache bloomed to life again.
"I love you, James Fraser," she whispered, digging her fingernails on his shoulders and working her hips in rhythm to his upward drive.
Jamie made a hoarse sound and pulled her down to brush his lips against hers. "I love ye too, Sassenach. Not being with ye, even for a day …it hurts so much." Lightning slashed through the room, and she saw his handsome face shadowed, his hair dishevelled from her desperate fingers. "Christ, a man like me should have to barter his soul to the devil to have someone like ye. But ye love me. Yer love is everything, and ye're saving this dark soul. What have I done to deserve ye?" he rasped on a harsh exhale.
Claire wanted to tell him he didn't have to change anything to deserve her. She loved everything about him, even that dark side he harboured. Together they could work things out. She hoped she communicated that with her eyes before he lowered his face into the crook of her neck and started bucking into her in rough strokes, his broken versions of her name on his lips.
The rain continued to drum against the windows, turning Jamie's cottage into their own private world where they were the only two people who existed. "Jamie," she whimpered, tugging the hair at the nape of his neck. He squeezed her bottom before lightly smacking it, grunting deep in his throat as she rocked against him at a faster pace. "Oh, God, I'm going to come. It feels so good."
Jamie reared with sharper and faster thrusts, answering every grind of her hips, and she sobbed, bracing herself on his shoulders. "Christ, Sassenach. Ah, fuck!" He lowered his head to suck her nipples, making her seized up around him.
Her pleasure exploded, vivid and bright, and when her thigh muscles slackened, Jamie surged up into her heat for the final time and roared, their peak vibrating between them with such force, her lungs were robbed of air, and her vision dimmed. There was nothing but their love spilling from their hearts. They clung to each other for a long while as the sound of rain switched from loud drumming to a pitter-patter, their mouths engaging in a slow, mating dance, their hearts beating closely together as if it sought to merge into one.
As their hearts calmed and their breathing slowed down, Jamie wrapped his arms around her to nestle his head in her neck. The sound of rain against the roof echoed through the cottage, and they remained motionless for a long time. When they did move, it's only because Jamie was aroused again, and their second time around ended up leaving trails of shambles and mess. A floor lamp and a vase were knocked over, and Rollo's basket bed accidentally kicked to the other side of the room. By the time they made it into his bedroom, a curtain had been yanked down, and apples rolled off the bowl on the dining table, leaving the living room in a state of disarray.
After another rigorous bout of lovemaking, they both collapsed into each other's arms. As they regained their breaths, Jamie released a satisfied sigh before closing his eyes with a smile. There was enough time for a talk later. But right now, all she wanted was to relish being cocooned in the warmth and safety of his arms. 
"Jamie?" she murmured as his breathing evened out. 
"Aye?" He was barely conscious, and she couldn't help but grin as she listened to the soothing beat of his heart beneath her ear. 
"You're definitely a keeper."
She watched as the sweetest smile formed on his tired but handsome face until sleep finally claimed him.
..........
Jamie had awoken earlier with Claire snuggled into him, their skin a wee bit sticky and damp from their body heat and yesterday's marathon sex. Coming out of a deep slumber had more to do with his thickening arousal than the internal body clock and the birds' chirping outside. It had made him wonder if his desire for Claire would ever wane, but it was quite apparent, after last night, he was still left with wanting more. But he'd let her sleep, knowing they both had jobs to attend to.
After they had awoken sometime during the night, they'd raided the fridge for something to eat and then went straight back to bed to talk about their work and their plans for today. Their energetic bed activity had left them depleted, but the intimacy of holding each other while conversing in the dark had restored his soul, resulting in a deep, restful sleep.
Although he'd told Willie he would come late to work, Jamie felt so well-rested, he'd decided to start early and let Claire do her own thing. It was a good idea, too, because after the freak storm yesterday, there were quite a few trees that had been damaged and needed to be cut down or remove for safety purposes. And Claire had many things to sort out, like getting in touch with some bloke for her boss' publishing company. 
He was working behind the village church, the area bordered with hawthorn, rowan and alder trees. He and Willie had already safely removed one of the damaged trees threatening to collapse on the church's roof and was just about to start uprooting a rotted tree stump when his godfather, Murtagh, came out of nowhere. It wasn't unusual seeing him there. It was part of his godfather's duty, as he called it, to pop up once in a while to check up on any of the Frasers.
"Ach, there ye are," Murtagh greeted with a half-smile. "Willie told me I'd find ye here." He took out a thermos flask from his rucksack and began to unscrew the top. "I thought I'd stop by and see what ye're up to. Heard the Beauchamp lass is back."
He wiped the sweat off his brows. "Aye, Claire's back. Picked her up yesterday."
Murtagh poured some tea into the thermos' cup and handed it to him. "Sounds like it's serious between the two of ye." He winked as Jamie gratefully took the cup and sipped the hot brew. "If she's anything like her mother, I'd be careful not to let her slip away. I made that mistake once, lad ...dinnae let that happen to ye too."
He frowned as he recalled seeing Harry at Inverness airport yesterday. "About that ...ye mentioned once over dinner that ye knew Claire's father, Harry ...I mean, Henry."
"Aye ...Henry, that prick, bless his soul," Murtagh muttered before making a sign of the cross. "I thought he was my mate. Did ye ken that pillock stole my burd from right under my nose?"
"I remember ye saying that. But tell me more about Henry."
"Ye were probably too young to remember." Murtagh shifted on his feet and shoved his hands into his jeans' pockets. "Before he met and married Jules ... Claire's mother, that is, we were the best of mates and hanged out a lot in the pub whenever he was here. Sometimes we'd take ye and Willie along when we went fishing or hiking. While I concentrated on teaching Willie how to hook a worm, Henry would be showing ye how to throw a pebble on the surface of the water. Or how to start a fire with sticks. Stuff like that. I could see from early on he was fond of ye."
Jamie searched his memory bank for that particular image, but he found none. "I have vague memories about fishing ..aye, but ye've taken Willie and me out with a lot of yer mates, especially summer when school was out." He wiped his dirt streak hands down the thighs of his jeans. "But I cannae seem to recall Henry."
"Hmmm ...nae wonder." Murtagh dragged a booted foot back and forth on the dirt. "It wasnae a pleasant memory the last time ye saw him." He swallowed hard as he looked into the distance. "After Henry married Jules, I didnae hear from them again. And it was a good thing too, because I think I would have given him a right good pounding after what he did. I dinnae think they would ever return, and I was surprised because they both loved this place and had made quite a few friends here ...even before they met."
Feeling the cold chill on his neck, Jamie turned up his sleeveless jacket's collar and zipped up his front. "So what happened the last time I saw him?"
Murtagh puffed out a breath. "The last time ye saw Henry, he was in a car accident ...with his family."
"What?" he choked.
Murtagh turned tired-looking eyes on him, and there was a deep sadness in them that startled him. "It was the day they were coming back to Broch Mordha for the first time in years. I heard talks around the village that they've rented a wee cottage from Mrs Baird. And also heard words about a wean. I didnae want to stick around to find out. I thought I'd take a wee trip to Skye and stay there until Henry and his family were gone. I was just packing when ye came barging into my hoose tellin me that a car had smashed to a tree. I came running oot like a gudgeon with ye right behind me. Ye must have been nine or ten. It wasnae far from where I lived then. By the time I got there, Henry was still alive, and Jules was unconscious. He ordered me to get the bairn first and then Jules. My first thoughts were to save Jules, but the wee child was screaming, and Henry was begging me to save her. Between the two of us, we managed to get wee Claire oot, and I ordered ye to take her as far as possible from the site. And that ye did. But I couldnae save Harry and Jules because the car caught fire and Henry lost consciousness. When I smelt gasoline, I had to run, and that's when the car exploded."
"Oh dear Lord." Jamie fell a step back as faint memories flying about like bits of a jigsaw puzzle flooded his brain, his mind struggling to fit the pieces together. Every time he managed to recall something, he couldn't hold on to it long enough to construct that day's event. 
He had so many questions and wanted to ask Murtagh more but drew up short when the crew of workmen, working for him and Willie rounded the church. Four sets of eyes landed on them, greeting them with a nod and grunt. Thinking this was not the place to discuss such things, Jamie cleared his throat and shook his head, his way of telling Murtagh they'll discuss this another time.
Murtagh grabbed his shoulder as he turned to pick up his equipment. "Look, lad," Murtagh began in a low voice. "Ye probably cannae remember because ye were so traumatised that day that ye're ma made ye attend some counselling. It took a year for ye to get over it. For as long as I've known ye, ye have this tendency to bury pain and grief. Just do me a favour, alright. Leave the past in the past. Talk to Claire about it by all means, but for fuck sake, dinnae tell yer ma I told ye. She'd be on my case like a rash. She thinks ye got enough on yer plate ever since ye came back from the Middle East without me dumping this on ye. Are we clear?"
Jamie nodded and watched his godfather turn around and leave. Claire's parents' accident wasn't news to him, but the fact that he had apparently been a witness, it was just too mind-boggling beyond words. It's hard enough to reconcile that there's a possibility he'd been communicating with a ghost for the past year and a half, and now, with Murtagh's latest revelation, he felt like he's going to implode with bafflement.
Mentally shaking himself, he banished any further thoughts about Harry and concentrated on doing as much job as possible to be with Claire sooner. Operating heavy machinery while his mind was elsewhere was dangerous. So he poured his concentration onto work.
Later that day, when he returned to the cottage, Jamie found Claire sat at the dining table with her laptop on, her dark curls tied loosely in a bun. There was a fire going already in the hearth and his home smelled of cooking. She sat cross-legged on the chair, and he realised she was talking to someone via video conference. Not wanting to disturb her, he quietly shut the door. But Claire had already seen him and beckoned him over with a motion of her hand.
She got up from the chair and stood on tiptoes to give him a kiss. "You're just in time," Claire smiled. "I'd like you to meet someone."
He returned the kiss and pulled her in close, inhaling her sweet clean smell. "I hope it's not yer boss."
She tugged his hand and laughed. "No, don't be silly."
He leaned down to look at her laptop, but there was no one there. Instead, a little rectangle showed him in the corner of the screen, making him winced when he saw his own image. He looked like he'd been hauled through a thicket in the rain and his hair laid around his face in thick, damp clumps. It was definitely not the first impression he would have chosen for meeting anyone associated with Claire. 
"Umm, Sassenach, naebody's there," he said, looking at her.
"Just hang fire," she replied, stealing another kiss from him.
He smiled. And when he finally glanced back down at the laptop, he nearly choked. Right there on the screen, peering up at him, was a cantankerous-looking, crocodile Dundee version of Harry. Same eyes, the same face, and though a handsome fellow, this man's skin looked weather-beaten, and he had a scary scowl on his face.
"Jamie," Claire giggled. "I'd like you to meet my uncle ...Quentin Lambert Beauchamp, also known as uncle Lamb. Uncle Lamb, this is Jamie, James Fraser ...my boyfriend. I'm staying with him at his place for at least a week."
"Is that right?" the man on the screen harumphed with a growl as he stuck a thick cigar between his teeth. "Not what I was expecting."
Ah, holy fuck! Though uncle Lamb looked like Harry, Jamie knew this man was nothing like Harry. Harry was ...or had been a polite, refined and jolly ol' chap with a very posh accent. This man was far from the polished look Harry presented. This man looked like he'd seen the world and confronted danger and probably wrestled crocodiles as a hobby. Convincing uncle Lamb that he's good enough for Claire was not going to be a walk in a park. Jamie knew he had a long evening ahead as he gingerly sat down in front of Claire's laptop and braced himself.
Jamie cleared his throat and sat up straight. "Good evening, sir ..."
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    Dear Readers,
This took a bit of time to write, usually the case with me when I'm writing a sex scene. But here it is, and I hope you've enjoyed this latest instalment. As always, I'm grateful for your feedback, so thank you very much for taking the time to comment. I may not always comment back, but you can rest assured I read your observations and answer any questions you may have, including constructive criticism. Until the next chapter, take care of yourselves, stay safe and keep the positive and love vibes going. Kudos to you all, my friends. 😀❤️
51 notes · View notes
chuckbass-love · 4 years
Note
Imma just put this out here. Imagine Steve Rogers and y/n making out a in Her bed in her apartment a few hours before his next mission. Their just snuggled together whilst Steve grinding into her and just having a amazing time making out and grinding on each other. But when Steve goes to fuck her he’s looking for a condom and he can’t find one. When he finds the box there’s actually no condoms left cause neither of them went to buy any lately. And y/n won’t let him go inside her without a condom so they can’t exactly have sex. So Steve finds over ways to satisfy them both 😉
This is going to be short ish but sweet but i hope you still love it...
Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 accounts without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader
Warning: Fluff & soft smut. Language, Oral (f and m receiving), fingering (vaginal and anal), hand job, overstimulation well kinda and last but not least, daddy kink. 18+
Word Count: 2,264
GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @softietom go check them out 💙
Make You Feel Good
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You nuzzle your head into the crook of Steve’s neck as his arm drapes around your body, pulling you in closer, if that’s even possible. You’re at the point where you can’t tell where he ends and you begin. 
Both of your legs tangled in each others, you’re naked and he’s just in his boxers. You’ve done nothing all weekend except fuck and make out. Obsessed isn’t the word for how you feel about him. He’s everything you’ve waited 25 years for. 
Being younger than him isn’t an issue though. People were skeptical at first, he’s older than old. Should be dead by now but since he was stuck in the ice for all those years, he didn’t age. But since they saw how happy the two of you make each other, they stayed out of it, letting you live how you want to.
His age rarely shows though. He’s more than capable of keeping up with you. If anything he has you gasping for air a lot of the time. Runs circles round you. 
His index finger lifts your head up so he can look right into your eyes.
“I have to go soon” he lowers his head to kiss you quickly but you pull him back in. Only breaking away to talk before claiming his lips again.
“Please stay” you beg, he never gets to stick around for long, there’s always something that requires his full undivided attention.
“I can’t princess. I’ll be back tomorrow though and besides, i have a little bit of time before i need to go”
You know exactly what he means by that so you beat him to it. Getting on top and straddling him. The kissing continues as his hands rest on the round globes of your ass. His favourite feature on your body. An ass man all the way. 
He relishes in the way it bounces each time he slaps it or whenever he’s fucking you from behind and his skin collides with yours. It’s the most mesmerising view.
His tongue slips into your mouth, exploring yours like it’s the first time. Winning the battle for dominance but let’s be honest here. When is Steve not in charge? You allow him to be simply because he’s so good at it and you love being owned by him.
Whenever he’s around, you’re stuck in this bubble where all you see, feel and taste is him. He makes you’re whole body turn to jelly, your pussy wet and your vision blurry. Everything about him has you walking around like you’re floating in the air. 
“God i’m so hard for you” his whisper like moans escaping as soon as you grind your naked and soaked core along his crotch, from the tip of his cock to just where his balls are most likely sitting. 
His nails dig in further and as soon as you wince he releases his grip “shit, did that hurt? I’m sorry baby, you just drive me crazy” 
You place your index finger over his mouth “shush, it’s fine. I liked it” 
Even during intimate moments, he remains a gentleman. Sure he can talk dirty and fuck you like a whore but he always makes sure you’re having a good time, that he’s not being too hard on you.
Typical Steve Rogers move.
Once you can feel yourself making a mess of him, you decide it’s time. You sit up slightly, making room for him to release himself out of the confines of his boxers.
“I need you so badly” you kiss him, not wanting to wait any longer, you speed up the process by practically yanking his boxers down.
“So desperate huh princess?”
You bite your lip “can you blame me? I need to make the most of having you here”
He agrees as he watches you wrap your hand around his shaft, pumping him a couple times before shimmying down so your mouth is level with him. He knows exactly what you’re about to do and he can’t wait to feel the warmth of your mouth around his cock.
“Mhmm, such a tease baby” he chuckles, breath hitching as you lick from his balls to his red tip.
One hand tugs on them the other pumps him as he gradually hits home, reaching the back of your throat. As he does, you gag, still not used to how big he is compared to other guys you’ve been with. He’s always loved the sound of you struggling.
“Is my cock too much for my princess?” he taunts
“No daddy” your words muffled by his cock, the sound vibrates onto his skin, sending a shiver down his spine.
You continue to work at him, now using both hands to twist around him gently, your saliva lubing him up beautifully. So much so that some even drips from the corners of your mouth. You’re making a real mess of yourself now.
“Fuck, gonna have me cumming in no time” 
“Cum for me daddy” 
As your hand pumps him, you sink down further, taking his balls in your mouth and sucking, bringing him even closer to his peak. The way his mouth is hanging open in the perfect O shape, his eyes closing gradually but keeping them open just a little, so he can see you making him feel good.
“I’m gonna c-cum” he stutters, groaning, his eyes shoot back open, he sits up slightly and you feel him twitch. You wrap your mouth around his tip, licking the slit before deep throating him, sending his world spinning. 
“Oh god” his hands grip the sheets into a fist, he spasms once more and before you know it his hot seed is spurting into your mouth, filling you up. Not in the way you imagined but you know he can go again.
You sit back on your heels, looking him dead in the eyes as you swallow everything he gave to you, just the way he likes. And he can’t get enough of it. “Come sit on my cock baby, wanna feel that pussy wrapped around me just like your mouth was” he leans to the side, opening the drawer on the bedside table “wait. Where are the condoms?” he asks. 
You shrug “they should be there” you respond, kissing on his neck, keeping things interesting. Even biting and sucking a little. Making sure to mark him. 
“God, baby. That feels so good” 
“They aren’t here” he moves things around, still not able to find them.
So you try.
Getting off the bed and checking all the drawers.
“There’s none here”
“Did we use them all?” he raises his brow.
You giggle “maybe we did, shit. What are we gonna do now?”
It wasn’t intentional. You had purchased a pack of 24. A pack you were sure were going to last you. But with you and Steve being the way you are, they didn’t last. 
Clearly you’re sex addicts. Who can blame you both? He’s hot and obsessed with you so you can never hold back. Morning sex, mid day sex, evening sex. Early hours of the morning too. Just name it, you’ve both done it.
He can’t stop himself and quite frankly neither can you but you wouldn’t want it any other way.
“We don’t have a lot of time before you need to go”
“That’s fine” he starts “come here” he starts tapping his face as he lies down on the bed “let me help you out”
You’ve had your fair share of orgasms from this mans mouth. That same mouth of his can have you shaking and trembling. But you’ve never ridden his face before. He’s asked plenty of times, you’ve always turned him down.
Maybe this time is where you say yes?
“Please, let daddy make you feel good princess, it’ll be just like the other times just a different position” 
You cave, settling yourself on top of him, your core inches from his face until he pulls you down so that you’re practically smothering him. 
“Mhmm” he mumbles, sucking on your little bundle of nerves and giving you that first shoot of pleasure through your body, causing a moan to leave your mouth. The sound is like music to his ears.
“Like this baby?”
“Yes daddy” you whimper, watching as he sticks his tongue out, agreeing to let you ride his tongue. So you do. You get comfortable. holding onto the headboard for support as you glide yourself over him, the feel of his flattened tongue is driving you crazy and you’ve gone from soaking to practically dripping in seconds. 
“Fuck, daddy” you cry, needing more, craving more.
“What is it princess?”
“It feels so good”
“You gonna cum baby? Cum all over daddy’s face and make a mess” 
“Yes daddy” 
“So even when i go on that mission, i’ll still be able to taste you”
His words are like bullets, shooting through you and killing you off.
Your end is near and you need it desperately. 
“Right there, keep doing that, oh fuck”
“Give it to me, let that pretty pussy cum princess”
Suddenly, his finger glides into you from behind and seconds later, another one circles your puckered hold, pushing it’s way in. Being careful not to hurt you. But from the look on your face, he can see that you love it.
“Love having both holes played with huh? Such a dirty girl for daddy princess”
“More, please, i need more” you beg, pathetically. 
You’re desperate at this point. You’re so close to finishing that you can see those stars in the distance when you scrunch your eyes closed.
Your hands find purchase in his hair and you’re so caught up in the moment that you don’t realise your hips moving faster and faster. Using his tongue to get you to there.
“Such a dirty baby” he mutters as he takes a break for air, shoving his fingers in and out of both holes, his pace getting quicker by the second.
“Oh shit” 
“You close?”
“Yes. Make me fucking cum daddy”
“You got it baby” he winks, sucking on your clit once again.
The all too familiar feeling arrives, starting at your pussy and running through your body. Your clit pulsates in his mouth as your walls flutter around his finger with your asshole repeating the same action. He keeps them in, thrusting them into you to ride you through your intense high. 
“FUCK YES” you scream, quivering and trying to get off of his face, he doesn’t let you. His mouth continues to work wonders on your sensitive nub, flicking across your whole sex with greed. 
But let’s be honest here when is he not greedy for you? He can’t get enough of you and how sweet you taste. 
He pulls his fingers out and uses his hands to lift you arousal covered hole directly over his mouth. He needs it all, all that you have to offer.
“Steve. Omg” your body shakes and your legs clam down on his head, keeping him there.
He starts to slurp and suck, making ungodly sounds as he cleans you up.
Once he’s finished, he taps your thighs and you get off. Collapsing onto the bed instantly.
“Steve” you pant, earning a low and raspy chuckle from him.
“Yes?”
“What the fuck?”
“Are you okay princess?” the innocent act comes out.
“You didn’t stop, i’m ruined”
“It’s my job to ruin you like that baby” he gets up off the bed, strutting into the bathroom as you lay there, unable to do anything. So you just watch him, his bum jiggling as he goes.
“You need a bath princess?” 
You mumble your response. You hear the bath water running and before you know it, he’s scooping you up in his arms.
“Come on baby, i got you”
He sits on the edge of the bath with you in his arms, waiting for it to finish running before he helps you in. Bubbles galore.
“I have to go now though” he looks down at his hands, he hates leaving and it shows. But you know this is his job. Being with him involves watching him go. Just like how you worry every time he’s away. It’s all apart of being Captain America’s girl. 
“I’ll be back tomorrow though. I love you, you know that right?” he says as he starts changing once he uses a wash cloth to clean himself up, brushing his teeth and styling his hair too.
“I do and i love you too” 
He grabs a hold of his shield, attaching it to his back before he leans down to press a final kiss to your lips and letting it linger.
“Stay safe princess”
“I should be saying that to you Captain”
He smirks, blowing a final kiss as he shuts the door and you hear footsteps through the room and out the front door. You already can’t wait for him to return.
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