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mypoisonedvine · 3 years

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claimed || alpha!Andy Barber x reader

summary: an interrogation with an alpha is no place to have an unexpected heat.

word count: 2.7k

warnings: smut (dub con; the reader goes into heat and can’t think clearly enough to say no), a/b/o dynamics, loss of virginity, mentions of misogyny/discrimination against omegas, vague noncon and violence references, kinda housewife kink, possessiveness, breeding kink, praise, overstimulation, knotting, slight bondage (reader is handcuffed), slight pain kink, implied/subtle age gap, pregnancy mention at the end, kinda soft!dark andy but he's really not that dark

"This would be a lot easier for both of us if you started telling the truth."

You chewed your lip, looking away from the man across from you; it was impossible to keep eye contact when his gaze bore into you like that, when he gave you that stern, dominating look.

Andy Barber was so obviously an alpha, he was one of those types that just reeked of it. Figuratively— with the way he towered over you, his masculine body and strong features— but also literally considering his scent was filling the room now: pine, cinnamon, sage, and something a little bit sweet that made your mouth water.

It made sense for an alpha like him to have a high-powered, high-pressure career like this; he probably got a real kick out of squeezing information out of scared betas who couldn’t stand up to him.

And that was the role you were going to play now, because he was wrong: it would not be easier if you told the truth. If he knew what you really were, you’d be doomed.

You’d been hiding successfully as a beta for a long time by now, and you weren’t about to give it up now, even if it would likely have the charges against you dismissed. Omegas lived sheltered, oppressed lives; sought constantly by alphas, they had their pick of the finest since omegas were so rare, but until mated they were extremely vulnerable— and afterwards they were usually made to be subservient housewives, constantly bearing children as a consequence of their extreme fertility.

Maybe some omegas were okay with that, plenty probably loved that lifestyle since it was sort of the instinctual habit of an omega by nature, but not you. Never you. You wanted a life, a real life, your own life as more than an alpha’s mate. Thankfully you’d found the right mix of suppressants and perfumes to hide your scent, the right work schedule so you could always be home for your rare heats, and voila: to the rest of the world, you were a beta.

Being a beta meant being unnoticed, unacknowledged, never pursued and never courted. And that was exactly how you wanted it.

If Andy Barber knew that the man you’d stabbed was an alpha trying to force himself on you, there was a chance he would understand that it was self-defense and let you go. Then again, a lot of alphas seemed to think that being forced to mate was just par for the course for an omega; surely Andy wouldn’t be one of those types, as a man of the law, right?

“I can’t,” you finally answered.

“Whatever it is, you can tell me,” he assured, some of his anger shifting to a soothing tone. It really did calm you down; he must have been using his ‘alpha voice’ on you, and the fact that it worked should’ve been a red flag but you didn’t notice. “Let’s start from the beginning. You said you were at home but no one has confirmed your alibi. You said you didn’t know the victim but you obviously reacted when I showed you his picture. And, you said you weren’t there at the time of the murder but we found your DNA on the body.”

A little smile pulled at the corner of your lips, exactly not the reaction Andy had been expecting. “You’re lying,” you whispered.

He tensed up as you called his bluff. The DNA found at the scene was in the process of being analysed, sure, but it would be weeks until the results came back. “How can you be so sure?” he pressed.

“Because I. Wasn’t. There,” you hissed, glaring back at him; he shook his head solemnly..

“No, that’s not it. I can tell when you’re lying, too, you know,” he warned. “Tell me how you know I don’t have your DNA at the scene?”

“Because… because…” you breathed, blinking a few times as the room started to get warmer. Your head was spinning, your thighs clenched together— and when Andy reached out to rest his hand on yours and ask if you were alright, his touch sent it all into overdrive.

No, no, it wasn't your time yet. It shouldn't have come for a few more days, and you’d arranged to be bailed out tomorrow so you’d go into your cycle safely at home and not in jail. But now it was beginning and you had no way to stop it. Had the smell of an alpha really been enough to start your heat early?

Andy watched you start to pant and sweat with a furrowed brow, unsure what he was witnessing because he’d never had the opportunity to see it before. His ex-wife had been a beta, he'd never even met an omega before— they were quite rare after all.

But what he lacked in experience, he made up for in instinct; his body told him everything he needed to know about what he was seeing. “Omega,” he growled lowly, watching your whole body erupt into shivers at the timbre of his voice.

As far as alphas go, Andy was relatively level-headed, not as preoccupied with instinctual desires to dominate, to claim, to impregnate. A lot of alphas viewed mating with a beta as settling, although it was the much more likely outcome, statistically speaking. Andy, though, never really saw it that way, even knowing how much harder it would be to have a child with a beta. Their fertility was significantly weaker, both the males and the females, and Jacob was the product of years of trying; in all their marriage him and Laurie had never used any contraceptives and she only got pregnant the once.

But an omega? Especially a young one like you? He could knock you up right now, if he wanted. That power was intoxicating. It was exactly what he never knew he needed so badly.

“I don’t need the results of your DNA to know what you are,” he explained firmly. “I can’t believe I didn’t know before— you must have tried really hard to keep it a secret, little one. You must be so afraid of who you are… and who I am, for that matter. It must scare you to imagine what I could do to you.”

You whimpered, the noise tugging his heart in conflicting directions; to comfort you, or to make you do it again.

“I’m not going to hurt you, if that’s what you think,” he assured. “Not if I can help it…”

Honestly, he wasn’t so sure he would be able to help it; he felt his own sanity slipping as he watched you writhe and cry, instinct overtaking logic in the both of you.

"Alpha, please," you shuddered, the title making his cock harden instantly, uncomfortably filling the trousers of his suit.

"You smell so good," he purred, taking his jacket off as he stood up to cool off a bit. "I can smell your heat, Omega. I bet everyone in the building can—” he glanced to the locked door— “but I'm the only one here."

"Need you," you whined, tugging on the handcuffs that kept you bound to the table.

"Stand up, bend over," he commanded, and he'd barely finished speaking when you'd already done it, bent at the hips with your forearms resting on the table as you waited for him. "Good girl."

He rolled up his sleeves and took his place behind you, caging his body in with yours, nuzzling into your neck to get a deep breath of your scent.

"Fuck, so sweet," he groaned. "Waited so long for this. To feel an Omega on my cock. Never thought it would really happen. Has an Alpha ever taken you before?"

"No, I never… no."

"Not just unclaimed but a virgin. Christ, am I dreaming?"

But he was too far gone to take any more time to appreciate his luck— he needed you now, and he was taking you all for himself.

If he wasn't so overcome with need he wouldn't have thought to tear your clothes off, but now he didn't even think to question the idea, shedding you of your clothes like they were made of paper until you were completely exposed to him, your wet core vulnerable while another wave of your sweet scent filled the room.

"Look at all this," he grinned, kneeling down to lap at your folds and taste your slick. Your eyes rolled back in your head, your channel craving to be filled. "All for me, Omega?"

"Yours, it's all yours…"

"Doesn't it feel good to be claimed, little one? To be owned?"

"S-so good," you agreed. "Want your knot, Alpha. Want your mark."

A growl echoed in his chest when you said that, and he craved nothing more than to bite your neck and bond you to him for life.

But, it would be better if he saved that for a little later.

He stood up again and gave your ass a quick slap— nothing too rough, just enough to make you yelp all cute and whiny— before grabbing your hips to pull them back into his. You gasped and pushed back onto him, shamelessly rubbing yourself against the thick outline of his cock.

"Gonna make a mess on me with all that slick, Omega," he growled, but it was by no means discouragement.

"Want it in me, please," you sobbed. Unable to resist your begging anymore, he hastily opened his belt and fly, sighing with relief when he wrapped his hand around his cock and pulled it out. Your whole body visibly quaked when he swiped the swollen head through your folds, coating himself in your plentiful arousal.

Without any further warning, he pushed his cock in with a loud moan, a cry tearing from your throat as he tore into your body. "Shh," he soothed as his fingers rubbed your spine, "that's my girl, that's my pretty Omega."

But pain wasn't really your issue; it hurt, yes, but what made you cry was that you were already on the edge, about to come from hardly anything. When he thrusted once, you lost it and your legs quivered as a new wave of slick started to dribble down them.

"Are you coming?" he asked darkly.

You could only nod, biting your lip to try to keep from moaning too loudly.

"Oh my god…" he groaned, amazed at how sensitive you were. Clearly he wasn't the only one realizing how powerful and incredible it could be when an alpha and omega mated.

He started to really pound into you then, each brutal thrust knocking you forward.

"Feels good when you come for me, Omega. Do it again."

You couldn't help yourself; his voice had complete control over your body, his words a command you were helpless to resist. With a broken whimper you came again, walls squeezing his cock in a weak and stuttered rhythm.

"It's better than they say it is. Even better than I imagined. So fucking good," he sighed. It felt so right, that was the thing. It felt like your body was made to be claimed and owned by him.

"Want your knot," you whined, "please, Alpha—"

"If I give you my knot, you're mine. My Omega. You will never allow another Alpha to touch you. You will not speak to another Alpha, look at another Alpha, even Betas are off-limits. When I bite you, you'll be bonded to me and become my wife, you'll never disobey me or leave me. When I knot you, you'll give me a child. Is all of that perfectly clear?"

It was everything you'd wanted to avoid just an hour ago. Now it was your greatest dream come true. "Yes, Alpha. Yours, Alpha."

"Want to be bred, Omega? Bred by your Alpha?"

"Please!" you sobbed.

"Then keep coming and I'll let you have it soon," he promised. "I'll give you all my come like you need so badly."

You whimpered as your walls seemed to try to suck him in deeper, gripping him so tight that it made his head spin. Orgasm after orgasm washed over you, too many and too numb to count, each part of you slowly stripped away and replaced with pure, all-consuming pleasure.

The base of his cock began to swell and you mewled proudly— that is, until, it just kept growing and you couldn't imagine taking anymore.

"P-pull it out," you begged instead.

"I told you that you would take my knot, was I not clear?"

But you hadn't realized how big it would get, how far it would stretch you— and it was still going. "It hurts, Alpha, please!"

"You'll get used to it, gonna keep it in you all night and give it to you every day so you'll have plenty of practice. Take my fucking knot while I come inside you and breed your cunt."

When his knot finally grew to its full potential, streams of hot come began to fill you, deeper than you had ever imagined possible. It was overwhelming, apparently unending, and one final orgasm rocked your body as you milked his cock for all it was worth.

He wrapped his arms around your body, holding you close and soothing you as you shivered and cried, his kisses trailing up your shoulder to your neck where, finally, he sunk his teeth into your skin and left his mark on you.

Your walls quivered around him at the feeling of being claimed, mated for life. In that moment you didn't notice or care that it was to a man you barely knew; he was your Alpha now, that was all that mattered.

He kissed and licked over the sensitive bitemark, whispering praises your ringing ears couldn't quite process yet.

At least you were getting bailed out a day early.

Andy kept his promise about exactly how owned you would be. For the first few months you didn't even leave the house, he was too busy filling you with his cock every day. Although he was happy to claim you anywhere he happened to find you— the shower where he hopped in randomly, the kitchen where he bent you over the counter, the living room where he pinned you onto the couch— his favorite place was the bed. It was rougher and more animalistic in the other places, but in bed he was possessive in an entirely different way.

"My wife, my sweet little wife," he whispered in your ear as he slowly thrust all the way into you, making your back arch until your chest pushed against his. "My Omega. All mine."

"Yours," you agreed.

The protectiveness increased tenfold when your scent changed during pregnancy, even more when you started showing; he was obsessed with the way you looked full of his baby.

As for you, omega life was better than you'd expected. At times you felt smothered by him, but simultaneously you felt worshipped and loved like you never thought you could deserve. He certainly spoiled you, though he expected your unwavering loyalty in return.

That part was easy, though. Love, not fear, kept you in check when other alphas had a wandering eye. They knew you were mated, the bitemark scar (which Andy never, ever let you cover) and ring (which Andy never, ever let you take off) were sign enough along with the change in your scent to them. Occasionally one would shoot his shot and get unilaterally rejected by you before getting his ass kicked by your husband. If only they knew what you'd done to the last alpha that tried to creep on you; how you met Andy in the first place.

In the end, maybe it wasn't so bad to fall into your instincts, your natural role in society. Andy sure made it pretty enjoyable with the way he brought you to the height of pleasure over and over every night. "Mine," he promised you in deep whispers, "from the moment I saw you."

#andy barber x reader #andy barber smut #alpha!andy barber x omega!reader #I'll add tags when I get home later

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rocorambles · 3 years

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Ruined Innocence

Pairing: Fallen Angel!Daichi x Angel!Reader

Genre/Warnings: Yandere, NSFW, Manipulation, Dub-Con/Non-Con, Tentacles-ish, Forced Bondage, Corruption Kink, Dacryphilia

Summary: Not everyone is what they appear to be and you learn that the hard way.

A/N: This is for @seijorhi 's Deal with the Devil Collab! Masterlist can be found here.

You don’t love the way older angels endearingly pinch your cheeks and fondly ruffle the top of your head, sending you off on your way as they go about their chores. But you love the freedom to explore that comes with your new wings and you flit around heaven, adventuring out to the corners of the beautiful realm, eyes sparkling and mouth open wide in wonder as you see visions and scenes you wouldn’t even have been able to imagine back when you were a human.

Most angels congregate with each other, floating and meandering together as they perform their heavenly duties, content with harmony and unity. But maybe because your newly purified soul is still finding its way, you feel antsy, a very human adventurous streak still driving you as you sniff out remote and quiet corners, eager to see what’s around every corner.

There’s not a hint of wariness or sense of danger as you trek around, squealing as you continue testing your wings. Maybe it’s naivety, but who can blame you? You’re in heaven. Why would you ever think anything or anyone would harm you here?

Little do you know the archangels whisper to each other, sentries standing guard at every known opening between realms as the threat of warfare and espionage increases between heaven and hell after a devastating betrayal by one of God’s own most trusted archangels.

Sawamura Daichi.

It’s a name and a face that God has striked from heaven’s history, wiping the minds of anyone outside his inner circle clear of to maintain peace among the realm. And it works. Maybe too well.

A handsome brunette amusedly smiles at the lack of fear and recognition in your face as you cheerfully greet him, not a care in the world as you perk up and fly over to him, curious about the strange angel you’ve never met before.

Daichi had only meant to sneak in and out, hopefully spy and return back to hell with any secret information he could get out of his old fellow archangels. But like an attuned predator, his attention had snapped at the pretty little fawn he had seen playing in the outskirts of heaven, so vulnerable, so far from the rest of your feathery flock. And his mouth had salivated, something dark and yearning inside of him as he imagined how delicious corrupting your soft and sweet soul would be.

There’s no lack of powerful, beautiful, sensual female entities in hell willing to warm his bed. Daichi knows from firsthand experience, rarely spending a night alone. Even eternity is too short not to indulge in the sins of the flesh. But a part of him misses the docile submissive natures of angels, the thrill of power he feels knowing how easily his more angelic partners would listen and obey to his every whim and fancy. Playing with your food is all fun and games, but Daichi’s always found the actual act of devouring to be the best part of any meal. And you look absolutely mouth watering.

It doesn’t concern you that you’ve never seen this handsome angel before. Heaven is vast and as a novice angel, you’re sure there’s plenty of feathery companions you haven’t met yet. You’re more pleasantly surprised by the fact that there even is another angel in your secluded nook of the realm. And you’re quick to get comfortable with Daichi (although you blush when he so quickly tells you to call him by his first name).

He’s kind and funny. You can tell he’s actually listening to your every word and not just politely nodding like most of the other older angels you’ve met so far. He has a certain vibrancy to him that you can’t pinpoint, something so much more raw and vivid than what you’re used to from the more austere and demure palette of the rest of heaven.

But you startle when Daichi suddenly reaches out and slowly trails his fingers along the soft velvety plush of your wings, eliciting a startled gasp from you and a strange stirring feeling inside of you.

“They’re so pure and white.”

You try to laugh off the way your heart is pounding, the way your body wants to instinctively lean in closer to his warm touch as he continues languidly stroking your wings.

“Don’t be silly, Daichi. I’m sure your wings are just as pure and white, just like everyone else in this realm.”

You’re confused by his silent smile as he continues lacing his fingers between your downy feathers, but you don’t think to question it, not when it feels so right to just melt in the soothing feeling.

You don’t know how much time has passed, but you startle awake when someone nudges you, face heating in embarrassment when you realize you’ve fallen asleep quite literally in Daichi’s arms. But you shyly smile when he waves off your profuse apologies, playfully whispering that you can make it up to him by keeping your meeting with him a secret so he doesn’t get in trouble for slacking off on work to hang out with you.

Your lips are sealed and in return for your slightly naughty deal, your heart warms and your eyes sparkle when he somehow finds you almost every day. You’re tempted to make a game of it, wondering if you made more of an effort to hide if he’d still find you. But somehow deep inside you know he would, that it wouldn’t deter him at all. And that thought alone brings a smile to yourself.

Is this what having a soulmate feels like? Do angels even have soulmates?

You know marriage is still a thing in this realm and you can feel yourself falling more and more head over heels for Daichi, letting yourself dream and think of what life would be like married to him, by his side for all of eternity. It would be a wondrous thing. A life full of adventures, laughter, kindness, and warmth. A life where you know you could always depend on him and trust him.

So when he kisses you one day, wrapping his strong arms around you and pulling you in close, you don’t resist. Instead you sigh in bliss as you feel your lips meld against each other. He’s so gentle, so careful as he deepens your connection, coaxing you into following his lead as he maneuvers the two of you on the wispy cloud cocoon beneath your feet.

You feel so loved, so taken care of as he murmurs sweet praises in your ear about how beautiful you are, how soft you are, how sweet you taste. But when you find yourself horizontal beneath him, scandalously molded to his body, hesitation and apprehension have you reluctantly separating your lips.

“What’s wrong?”

His hand cups your cheek, brown eyes staring down at you in concern and you feel more at ease as you nuzzle against his palm, gently pecking the center of it, ignorant of the way brown eyes darken at the action.

He’s going to fucking ruin you.

“Can we- Can we slow down a bit? I love you, but we shouldn’t go any further until God blesses our relationship and we’re married. Right?”

It’s adorable how you know what’s right by heavenly standards, what you should and shouldn’t be doing. Yet there’s still a questioning lilt in your voice as you look at him for guidance, ready to take his lead and listen to whatever he says. You really are precious, aren’t you?

“We’ll be together forever. So what’s the harm in indulging ourselves now if we know that we’ll be bound for eternity anyway? Consider it a little sneak peek. Surely God will be forgiving if we go straight to him after this and ask him to bless our union.”

Hook. Line. Sinker.

He internally smirks at how your eyes light up when he expresses his desire to be with you. To his defense, it’s not a lie. He truly does want you with him forever, although he doubts it’s in the way you’re thinking. He’s no mind reader, but he can imagine the scenes of soft radiant glowing days and peaceful strolls hand in hand that race through your mind when you think of love. Unfortunately for you, the reality you’re being sucked into is much darker and much more stationary. (He sincerely hopes you appreciate the costs and efforts he’s gone through to spruce up his bedroom and bed as much as possible for your long-term stay considering it’s the only place he intends for you to see for at least a few centuries.)

This time you welcome him when he swoops down to capture your lips once more, your arms gently wrapping around the back of his neck as you pull him down even closer to you. You bare your neck, easily following his silent commands as he trails kisses down from the corner of your lips to the side of your neck, gasping and arching into him when his tongue swipes a hot wet line at the junction of your shoulder.

You’re nervous as he coaxes you out of your delicate clothing and his cock twitches in interest at how you try to instinctively shield your body from his eyes, your arms crossing your chest, thighs clenching together. So different from the shameless females down below and he enjoys how it feels like he’s unwrapping an exclusive present as he eases your body, comfortingly kissing you as he guides your hands above your head and nudges your legs apart until he’s in between them.

You moan, writhing underneath him in a way that makes him groan as he sucks one of your nipples, rolling the other between his fingers. And he can’t resist how right it feels to grind and rut his clothed cock against your bare core, chuckling at how you whine and get flustered as he whispers to you about how wet you are, how much of a mess you’re making of his clothing.

You’re so sensitive, so reactive. He wonders if you could cum just like this, nipples toyed with and humping like wild beasts. You certainly look like you’re almost there and a mean smile splays across his face when he wonders what God would think if he saw his baby angel now, a lewd blissful expression blatant on your face, wanton moans filling the air. But time is limited especially when he’s not on his own turf and as much as he’d like to ruin you over and over again right here, right now, he knows he needs to deal the final blow.

He’s quick to shed his own clothing, firmly wrapping your spread legs around him as he finally sinks his cock inch by inch inside of you, throwing his own head back in pleasure as your tight wet walls wrap around him, eagerly sucking him in and clenching around him. It’s like you were made for him, made for this. And his eyes ravenously watch as you mindlessly blabber on and on about feeling full, feeling good.

He doesn’t usually like noisy bed mates, but you might be the one exception and he revels in your wails and broken cries as he begins to move his hips back and forth, observing how his fat cock obscenely stretches your pretty folds as he thrusts in and out. It’s impressive how you’re still hanging by a single fraying strand of consciousness when even seasoned succubi have succumbed into mindless pleasure-addicted messes from his cock. And he gifts the slipping clarity of your mind that recognizes him and calls his name over and over again with skillful circles around your clit, relentless until you’re thrashing and convulsing, practically screaming as you fall over the edge, pussy milking him and begging for his essence.

Who is he to deny you what your body wants? What your body needs? What he himself wants and needs?

So he finally lets himself go, sealing the deal with his own release, eyes twinkling in crazed amusement as his own wings finally flair out, revealing themselves to you for the first time as his body lances with pleasure. A sound halfway between a laugh and a groan escapes him as fear has you tightening around him and if he thought you looked beautiful before, you’re absolutely stunning now, shock and disbelief slicing across your perfect angelic face when you fully grasp the importance of his pitch black wings that shadow the both of you.

“Don’t be like that, sweetheart. I thought you loved me.”

There’s no point in pretending to be gentle now and he forcefully pins your body down, slamming his lips against yours in a bruising kiss, biting on your lower lip and lapping at the blood that drips from your now marred face. Delicious. So fucking exquisite.

It’s tempting to continue and as he pulls away to regard you, he can feel arousal swirling inside of him at the sight of glistening tears streaming down your face. But he’s curious about your reaction, eager to hear what you have to say about this utter betrayal.

“A fallen angel…I slept with a fallen angel. How am I ever going to face God now?”

You’re not even looking at him anywhere, eyes glazed over as you mumble to yourself, mind still trying to process everything. And as pretty as you are with agony and sickening realization settling into your features, he scowls at the mention of God, irritation swelling inside of him at how fast you are to think of Him over Daichi, the fallen angel literally still inside of you.

He’s swift in his punishment, reminding you exactly where you are and who you’re with right now as he sharply juts his hips in a way that forces a surprised shriek from you as his cock rubs against your still sensitive walls.

“God isn’t your problem anymore, love. Look at your wings.”

Every part of you still in denial screams at you not to listen, to pretend none of this has happened, is happening. You want to believe God can make this right, that he’ll surely forgive you. But as if you’re in one of those inevitable horror films you used to watch as a human, your head slowly turns to the side, body going rigid when you see the expanse of ebony feathers where heavenly white used to be.

Now this reaction is much more satisfying and Daichi inhales your fear, a cold smile on his face as he watches you flail, wings wildly flapping as you try to somehow shake off the color, praying that it’s all a lie, that it’s not entirely irreversible. But he pins your wrists above your head when you attempt to painfully pluck out your own offensive feathers, peppering humiliatingly affectionate kisses all over your face to placate you.

“Please stop. Isn’t this enough? You got what you wanted. Tricked the silly angel. Made me an exile, a monster. There’s no place for me in heaven anymore. So just leave me alone. Please.”

You shudder at the dark laugh that seems to echo in your ears with his face right besides yours, cringing when you feel his wings droop down to rest against your own in an action far too intimate for what the two of you are.

“It’s not enough, darling. It’ll never be enough. But you’re right about one thing. You’re no longer welcomed in heaven, so let me bring you to your new home.”

You barely have time to understand the meaning of his words before you’re being whisked away, strong arms holding you tightly to a broad chest, the air around you growing darker, heavier, warmer. And then suddenly everything is still and you gasp as you’re thrown onto a silky plush surface, scrambling to sit up only to freeze in terror as you take in the grand and imposing bedroom you’re in, cold realization of exactly whose bed you’re currently on and what realm you’re in sinking in.

“No no no no no...At least let me go to Earth!”

You make to lunge off the bed, but an eerily familiar body forces you back down, once comforting brown eyes now only making anxiety churn alarmingly inside of you.

“I know it’s hard to believe me after all the lies, but I wasn’t lying about one thing. I do intend to be with you forever, so get comfortable, angel.”

You recoil at the mocking sneer associated with the pet name, the ironic use of the word disintegrating any fight left in you when the true hopelessness of your situation makes itself known. And Daichi watches in satisfaction at how you don’t even twitch as black shadows coil around your wrist and ankles, pulling you into a spread-eagled position, leaving your beautiful naked figure on full display for him.

But as despondent as you are mentally and emotionally, your body is already well on its way to adjusting and molding to his desires and he hungrily eyes the way it betrays you, arching and silently begging for more as additional shadow tendrils snake their way on and around every inch of you, some tendrils beginning to make their way in your gaping mouth, your still cum-filled hole, and oh...maybe he should have warned you that he planned on training all your holes, but he does so love the way your eyes blow wide open when a curios tendril wiggles its way into your puckered hole.

“Consider this your new full-time job, angel. Can’t have you living here rent-free after all. Now be good while I’m away and try not to be so loud. Wouldn’t want anyone else to hear you and decide they want a taste of a new fallen angel. I guarantee you no one else down here in hell is going to be as patient and kind as I am. Welcome to your new forever home.”

He doesn’t wait for a response, not that you’d be able to utter anything remotely intelligible around your screams and moans and the tendrils fucking your mouth. And as he makes his way to another meeting with Satan, he proudly flaunts his pitch black wings, a thoughtful smile on his face as he thinks of all the plans he has for you.

#haikyuu smut #yandere haikyuu #yandere daichi #daichi smut #daichi x reader #haikyuu x reader #tw: yandere #tw: dubcon #tw: noncon #deal with the devil collab

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pillow-anime-talk · 3 years

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favorite types of kisses.

synopsis: Where do they love to be kissed? And where do you love to be kissed by them?

# tags: headcanons; current relationships; romance; fluff; kisses & PDA in general; sfw & suggestive

includes: gender neutral reader ft. ciel phantomhive, sebastian michaelis, grell sutcliff, undertaker, snake & lau {kuroshitsuji}

author’s note: huh, so i watched ‘kuroshitsuji’ and i’m a full-fledged simp now.

— CIEL

↘ Kisses on the CHEEKS; are Ciel’s favorites. They are kisses for literally any occasion – for good morning, for goodbye, for good luck at work. It’s a kiss that can be made while saying wishes, for a good night’s sleep or for a safe journey. When you peck Ciel on that part of his face, he feels appreciated and at peace. Your lips are extremely delicate and warm, perfectly harmonizing with the cool and porcelain skin of his whole body. Additionally, when you show him affection, he has the courage to smile slightly, not even worrying about Sebastian’s later jokes about his own, crimson blushes. Your kisses are soothing and the Young Lord can never get enough of them, so give them to him as often as possible.

↘ Kisses on the NOSE; it’s the kind of kiss Ciel gives you on many possible chances. They are cute and you’re cute to him too, so he usually kisses you on the nose when you’re happy or when something incredibly fantastic happened, for example, you won a game of chess with someone or you received something from your parents (or from your future husband) like tickets for spectacle you really wanted to go to. Pecks on the nose are short and precious, but incredibly memorable and heart-warming. Plus, they’re sometimes very playful, so you can experience that side of Ciel that no one else can see now or ever.

— SEBASTIAN

↘ Kisses on the HANDS; it’s the most intimate kiss for a demon, for a butler, who has no right to touch others, even with gloves on. That’s why when you hold them and kiss his wrists, knuckles, fingers, nails, he feels so sinless. He feels human and just plain good. However, the tall man still wonders, how can you voluntarily kiss his hands? After all, these are hands that have taken so many (often pure) lives. Which had seduced so many people before. Which are cold, rough and unhealthily pale. And yet you still do it, always with the same innocent smile on your charming face that makes Sebastian feel that he has some positive emotions inside him, in his black soul. You will definitely be his death one day.

↘ FOREHEAD kisses; it’s the most tender kiss you can get from another person, from a lover, from a partner, from a person who’s the whole life for one side of couple. Sebastian doesn’t kiss you often. He only does this on important occasions, such as when it’s your birthday or when it’s Christmas. However, when you get hurt or you are sick, I’m sure that you will feel his lips on your forehead more than once, not only so that the black-haired man can feel your body temperature, but most of all, to make you feel that he’s close to you and you can always rely on him, even if it’s some small, even stupid thing or request. After all, he’s not simply one hell of a butler, but also a simply one hell of a good and kind lover, if you want to.

— GRELL

↘ JAWLINE kisses; Grell is a hot lover. They love every kind of kiss, however, there is one particular that they would literally die for. Jawline kisses are one of the sexiest kisses lovers can give each other. When you kiss them on the jawbone, Grell feels like you’re standing on the verge of kissing their lips and biting them on the pretty neck. It’s exciting not knowing which way you’re going to go on. This pinch of uncertainty and surprise is something they adore. Kissing on the jawline is also quite sloppy, and that happens quite often in your relationship, because after all, you both get busy with your own activities, so you have to show your affection quickly to enjoy each other more afterwards. However, it’s definitely worth waiting for the next such kisses.

↘ Kisses on the BARE SHOULDER; with Grell you feel cherished and desirable. They appreciate you like nobody else, compliment you like nobody else, caress you like nobody else. Your figure is the best canvas you can imagine for Grell, and your arm is like the first touch of a paintbrush. You love being kissed on the shoulder for two reasons – they’re intimate and affectionate, and at the same time, they can lead to more. You have a strange soft point for the Grell’s smile, and their teeth are your greatest weakness. Do you know how beautiful your shoulder look when Grell kisses or bites you there? They’ll definitely take some photos and toss them between the pages of their notebook as little bookmarks.

— UNDERTAKER

↘ Kisses on the CHIN; he’s damn tall and likes to tease you so badly. He lives for fun, so watching you try to kiss him on the lips or on the face in general is his daily pleasure. You practically never reach where you want, so you end up kissing him on the chin, and at one point that kiss became a favorite for Undertaker. Why? Probably because it’s the kiss you ask for the most, the one you care about the most, the one you want to feel the most. You’re so adorable when you jump or stand on tiptoes to reach for a peck. And... don’t think that Undertaker will ever make things easier for you. You gotta try harder, shortie.

↘ Kisses on the LIPS; however, there are days when your boyfriend demands a kiss, when he wants intimacy that only you can give him. Therefore, he immediately kisses you on the mouth, without any prior warning. For example, when he’s sitting at his desk in his shop, he suddenly pulls you onto his thicc lap and gives you a few quick but warm kisses right on your lip-balm-tasting mouth. You love these moments because a kiss on the lips is the kiss closest to those in love, it’s a kiss reserved only for two people in a relationship. So, could there be anything better than showing affection in this way to a person who means so much to us? Definitely not.

— SNAKE

↘ Kisses on the NECK; he will never admit it, but he likes the closeness you give him. He appreciates the sense of safety you show him every day. When you kiss him on the neck, on the scales that once seemed to him to be a defect or on his Adam’s apple he additionally feels that you want him like a normal and simple person, that you feel love and desire for him. It’s lascivious to kiss someone’s neck, you know that? That’s why when you do that, Snake melts. Your kisses on the neck, light bites, skin sucking are something that he associates with what he likes the most (apart from you, naturally), and these are his beloved snakes. When you kiss him on the larynx, he knows he’s helpless and vulnerable to you, so keep doing it and show him a lot of affection, okay? The boy definitely deserves it.

↘ Kisses on the TEMPLE; Snake is a sweet guy. He’s a bit shy and usually communicates with you through his pets who always help him tell you about his own feelings. When Oscar, Emily or Wilde tell him to give you a kiss on the temple, who would he be if he hadn’t obeyed their silent commands? He kisses you on the temples because he reaches to them perfectly. He kisses you on the temple because he thinks it’s a kiss that suits you both perfectly. He kisses you there because it’s a kiss that means a wish to protect you. You are important to him, and he wants to be as close to you as possible. He want you to know that he’s right next to your figure and these kisses always informs you about his presence and intentions through. You loves it, really.

— LAU

↘ Kisses on the EYELIDS; his eyes are closed most of the time, which is why he likes to be cared with your kisses. I think his facial skin is really soft and smooth, so kissing his eyelids is pure pleasure for the two of you. Lau has a soft spot for your scent, so when you bend over to give him a peck on the eye, he smirks silly, inhaling your sweet perfume scent or your morning scent after a nice night in the soft sheets. Every time you kiss his eyelid, he may even be tempted to open his eyes to see you better. And he definitely don’t regret the moment when he does it, because your smile is the brightest thing within a radius of several kilometers.

↘ EAR kisses; sometimes he’s just an idiot. He knows this is one of your most sensitive places, very prone to tickling, to his nice breath, to his wet but hot tongue. He likes to tease you, but that doesn’t mean you don’t like being teased. Kisses on the ear are intimate and private, they are often surrounded with a few whispers or compliments, and you love to feel appreciated and praised by him. Lau is the perfect lover, sometimes funny, sometimes serious, but no matter what the situation, you can count on him to give you a long kiss on the earlobe in the next few minutes. Your reactions are his favorite, so don’t count that he would ever stop doing it.

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sage-nebula · 3 years

Note

Top 5 Jounouchi moments

5.) “I’ll never give up on myself, or on you! So you don’t give up either, okay, Yuugi?”

There’s a whole lot more to this scene than just that line, but basically: during Death-T, when they’re locked in the falling block room but before the blocks start to fall, Yuugi has a minor freakout because he thinks it’s his fault that everyone is stuck inside there with him. In return, Jounouchi has a minor freakout because he’s upset that Yuugi is blaming himself. And that’s all well and good, but what makes this scene stand out for Jounouchi is that he ends up opening up to Yuugi (and Honda and Anzu, since they were also present) about how much he used to absolutely hate himself but how that changed when he met Yuugi and returned the piece of the Puzzle he stole. This is significant in a couple ways:

One, Death-T happens smack in the middle of the school arc, and so it’s still fairly early in the series. When the manga starts, Jounouchi is chock full of toxic masculinity that informs his behavior and choices, and part of that toxic masculinity is a refusal to be vulnerable with others, or to show any kind of sensitivity. See: how he didn’t want to admit that he believed in fortune telling in chapter . . . four, I think it was, and so he blamed them going to see the fortune teller on Anzu rather than admit that he was the one who wanted them all to go. But here, he’s opening up and revealing vulnerabilities about himself. He’s admitting that he used to absolutely hate who he was, that he took his self-hatred out on Yuugi, and that he started to like himself for the very first time when he returned the piece of the Puzzle he stole. He’s being vulnerable in front of his friends, which is something that he absolutely would not have done at the start of the manga. It’s a significant point of growth for his character.

Two, it’s also significant because the reason he’s doing it is not for himself, but rather for Yuugi, which is something consistent with Jounouchi’s character throughout the manga. Jounouchi is incredibly selfless and would quite literally die for those he loves. Here he’s vulnerable not because he wants the others to know that he has had horrific self-esteem throughout his life, but rather because he wants to show Yuugi just how important Yuugi is to him and make it plain that Jounouchi himself is better off because he has Yuugi in his life. He makes sure that Yuugi knows that Jounouchi will always believe in him and always be there for him and presses Yuugi to acknowledge the same. This is especially poignant considering the next chapter, wherein Yuugi tells Jounouchi and Anzu about Atem, and Jounouchi once again reaffirms that he will always consider Yuugi his best friend, no matter what other spirit resides in him (or the Puzzle as the case may be). It’s just a really beautiful moment.

4.) If you tell Jounouchi he’s going to die, he will face an Egyptian God and walk backwards into life.

Sure, he “lost” the duel. (“Lost” being in quotation marks because if they weren’t playing with holograms the attack would have counted and he would have won.) But the fact remains that Jounouchi Katsuya played a Shadow Game against an Egyptian God and not only tanked the hit, but even though he did die, that death was temporary. A direct attack from an Egyptian God during a Shadow Game only managed to kill him temporarily. He spent, what, a handful of hours in that hospital bed, tops? A handful of hours and he was back on his feet like nothing ever happened. And it’s not even like this was some random-ass Shadow Game either. This particular Shadow Game delivered direct damage to his body / life force with every Life Point he lost. He took hit, after hit, after hit, with the finishing blow being the fires of Ra and he still managed to survive. Like, yes, he died for a little while. For a couple hours. But then he woke up and was fine. And he’s not like other characters in this series, who are reincarnations of ancient Egyptian mages or who have Millennium Items backing them up. Nope, he’s just a punk from the wrong side of the tracks who is too goddamn stubborn and determined to live to be killed. Whether gang leaders (Hirutani), professional serial killers (Chopperman), revenge-driven Millennium Item wielders (Malik), or actual gods (Ra), no one can kill Jounouchi Katsuya for long, and that’s goddamn amazing.

3.) Throwing Hirutani off the roof and out of his life.

Okay, listen. We all know that I love the Trash King Bitch himself and that I do wish that he had come back later on in the manga, even though he wouldn’t have any interest in Duel Monsters and so it wouldn’t make much sense for him to be involved in those arcs. Despite this, though, I have to say that I do love how his part in the story wrapped up for Jounouchi. When we first saw Hirutani, Jounouchi (understandably) had to be saved by Atem. He didn’t get to settle things with Hirutani on his own terms. So when Hirutani comes back in chapters 48/49, Jounouchi gets a chance to settle the score and close the book on that part of his life for good, for himself. Yes, at first he’s put into a bit of a jam when HIrutani has Yuugi literally hanged by the Millennium Puzzle, but Jounouchi manages to save him, and then—with Yuugi’s encouragement—is able to tell Hirutani to go screw himself when Hirutani suggests that Yuugi will be safe so long as Jounouchi complies with what he wants (which Jounouchi did consider, until Yuugi spoke up and said that would never happen, giving Jounouchi the strength to agree). But even without my own Wishshipping bias, the entire fight on the roof was just [chef’s kiss]. Hirutani reminiscing about their past in an attempt to sway Jounouchi’s feelings, Jounouchi winning the fight despite Hirutani throwing glass in his eyes, and then finally, knocking Hirutani off the roof of the warehouse. It was a way to win the fight, yes, but it was also symbolic. He knocked Hirutani off the roof and out of his life. He closed the door on that relationship for good, and it was a very poignant and important moment for him that often gets overlooked.

2.) “Yuugi, I will stand with you on the edge of the River Styx . . . but I won’t let you cross over!”

Everything about the scene where Jounouchi saves Yuugi from the Black Crown fire is just . . . [chef’s kiss] Let me count the ways in which this scene is incredible:

1.) Jounouchi realizes pretty quickly that Yuugi will not leave that raging inferno without putting the Puzzle back together and freeing it from the table. He just won’t. And instead of continuing to fight with him about it, Jounouchi quickly takes control of the situation and tells everyone else to get the hell out while he stays behind to help Yuugi. Once everyone else is out of harm’s way, Jounouchi calmly stands there amongst the raging flames and thinks the above line. He’s literally willing to stand at the edge of death with Yuugi, no matter how bad the flames or the smoke is, but he’s equally as determined to make sure that Yuugi lives. But even setting aside my Wishshipping bias (again), I feel that this is such an incredible display of Jounouchi’s character, particularly in contrast to how horribly the anime liked to portray him. Jounouchi quickly analyzed the situation, took command of the others there and got them to safety, and then held his composure in the middle of an inferno while he watched over Yuugi. He thinks quickly on his feet, he’s decisive, he’s strong, and he’s resilient, and this scene showed all of those qualities beautifully.

2.) Jounouchi is the one who figures out how to free the Puzzle after Yuugi has put it back together (and Yuugi has passed out). Although Atem does manage to psychically connect with Jounouchi while Jounouchi is trying to pry Yuugi’s fingers off the Puzzle, in the manga all he says is Jounouchi’s name; Jounouchi is the one who spots the pipe and uses it as a wrench against the table to free the Puzzle from where it was stuck, declaring loudly that they were not going to die in that fire as he did so. Again, he’s resourceful and thinks quickly on his feet. Any characterization of Jounouchi as stupid just because he has bad grades and his mouth runs before his brain catches up sometimes is flat out wrong, as proven by this scene here.

3.) And finally, that scene where he carries Yuugi out of the flames . . . absolutely beautiful, a masterful work of art, 10/10, even better in the fully colored version of the manga. He holds Yuugi in a bridal carry and gets him out of that burning building, making good on his word to not let Yuugi die there. Absolutely immaculate. [chef’s kiss]

1.) Sacrificing himself to save Yuugi at the pier.

Anyone who didn’t see this coming just does not know me at all, but yeah, the pier duel is my absolute favorite part of the manga for so many reasons, and again, I feel like I have to count the ways here:

1.) First of all, it is impossible to talk about this without talking about how Jounouchi managed to break the Millennium Rod’s power over him. As stated above, Jounouchi is just a boy from a broken home. He doesn’t have an Ancient Egyptian preincarnation, he doesn’t have magic powers, he doesn’t have a magical artifact. All he has to his name is ¥600 and unmitigated gall. And yet, despite practically anyone casting him aside as unremarkable, he and he alone managed to completely break the power the Millennium Rod held over him, through nothing but sheer determination. This is, again, not talked about very much, despite it being one of (if not the) most remarkable feats in the entire manga canon. No other character managed anything even remotely close to this. But although the Rod held Jounouchi for a time, just like Ra’s attack, the effect only lasted for a handful of hours. Jounouchi throws off the chokehold of dark magic in a handful of hours like it’s nothing. His audacity is unparalleled and I love him for it so much.

2.) Jounouchi’s connection with the Red-Eyes Black Dragon is never explained, but it’s extremely present both here and when he comes back to life later on (which in-universe is like two days later, tops, because so much happens in so little time in YGO), but it’s still worth remarking upon. In this particular instance, Red-Eyes was on Yuugi’s side of the field. The duel was over. There was absolutely no reason for Red-Eyes to react or listen to Jounouchi at all. But when Jounouchi called for her, her eyes flared to life and she attacked him as he requested before her hologram vanished. That moment will always stick out to me, particularly since we don’t know why Red-Eyes has such a connection to Jounouchi, but she very obviously does in a way that we see with only a few other humans and monsters in the series.

3.) Jounouchi Tarzan-swinging across the pier on the chain of his handcuff and swiping Yuugi’s key before they’re both dragged into the ocean is just an admirable feat of athleticism and dexterity that is just [chef’s kiss]. Sure, he doesn’t have enough time to unlock Yuugi before the anchor drops, but he has enough time to grab Yuugi’s key, and considering how tiny that key was and how deep the box that held it was, that’s still pretty impressive.

4.) And finally, the big one . . . although Jounouchi’s self-esteem definitely got better after he befriended Yuugi, there’s a huge difference between “better” and “good”. Jounouchi doesn’t give up, he refuses to go down without swinging, he doesn’t take kindly to others putting him down. But while Jounouchi doesn’t take insults from others lying down, that doesn’t stop him from insulting himself or from feeling very badly about himself and his own capabilities. He’s very quick to blame himself for things entirely beyond his control, and to feel that those failures are a result of his own inadequacies. For example, he blamed himself for Shizuka being afraid to remove her bandages, saying that it was his fault and that he wasn’t good enough to give her the courage that she needed. This was the entire reason why he entered Battle City: so that he could give her the courage she needed. (And then he stays in Battle City to fight Malik and help Yuugi, but that’s a digression.)

The reason why this is important is because part of feeling like you’re inadequate, like you’re responsible for whatever goes wrong, like you’re a screw-up who will never be good enough, is also feeling like you’re not really deserving of the love or respect of other people. Again, it seems a bit paradoxical to say that’s the case with Jounouchi given how he’ll talk himself up when it comes to certain subjects and how he doesn’t stand for others belittling him, but a.) his bravado is often false, and b.) just because he won’t let others bully him doesn’t mean he won’t bully himself. When it comes to Jounouchi’s loved ones, he puts them on a pedestal and therefore, on some level, sees them as being better than him. Shizuka and Yuugi can do no wrong, so whatever goes wrong in their lives is probably his fault somehow, whether it’s because he caused it or because he can’t fix it. And he always needs to be better, to be deserving of the love they give him. He needs to earn it, you know? (In his eyes, at least; you know they wouldn’t agree with that.)

All of this is relevant because Yuugi telling Jounouchi that he loves him here just . . . shakes Jounouchi to his core. As Yuugi is giving his little speech, Jounouchi actually tells him to stop, not only because he can tell what’s likely going to happen after (because after all, Yuugi said that he wanted to buy enough time to say what he wanted to say), but also because hearing that someone loves him, and loves him so strongly, is basically earth-shattering for him. To be clear, in Japanese culture people don’t really say “I love you” to each other. Culturally, it’s just not a thing at all to tell your friends that you love them. Even married couples very rarely say it. It’s like a “you might say it on your death bed” kind of thing. The word that Yuugi used, too, is incredibly strong; “daisuki” is basically “head exploding levels of love and affection.” There’s a reason why, in stories like this, it’s usually reserved for dramatic confessions of love. But setting my Wishshipping bias aside once again, I’m not bringing this up to make an argument of how much this comes across as a romantic confession (though it does), but rather to explain just how strongly that would affect Jounouchi. To hear Yuugi say “I love you” using a word as strong as “daisuki” . . . I doubt he was able to even fully process how that made him feel until days later, much less in the minute he had before Yuugi’s life points hit zero and the anchor dropped. For someone who feels as if he’s never been good enough, for someone who has to deal with the fact that his own parents don’t love him . . . being told that someone he cherishes and holds so highly does love him is beyond profound.

But then, to build on that — the anchor drops, they’re dragged under the ocean waves, Jounouchi frees Yuugi from the cuff. He apologizes . . . and then he says thank you with a soft smile on his face. Jounouchi knows he’s going to die (although he is going to try to use the key on his own cuff just in case), but he’s still thanking Yuugi while smiling. He’s thanking Yuugi for loving him. He is, indirectly, saying that he loves Yuugi, too. And he smiles as Yuugi’s eyes open a little, because if nothing else he wants Yuugi’s last image of him to be one of him smiling in gratitude and love.

Excuse me while I go cry at this beautiful and poignant moment.

(But also yes, the entire scene really does come off as a romantic confession, especially in the original Japanese, and especially when you compare it to romantic confessions in other manga aimed at the same demographic, and if one of them was a girl there wouldn’t even be a question about whether it was romantic or not, thank you and goodnight.)

#top 5 meme #yugioh #jounouchi katsuya #wishshipping #(since it's in there I couldn't help it)#yuujou #Anonymous

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whenimaunicorn · 3 years

Text

Playing House - Part 13.1

Summary: Ivar clarifies your role, and Hvitserk reaps all the benefits. Words: 2588 Notes: Content Warnings for bondage (possibly uncomfortable), BDSM humiliation and dirty talk, orgasm control, roleplayed dub/noncon (now that the relationships are established I’m going to remind you less often that they’ve already negotiated consent and safety measures).

Previous posts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

(Fic begins below the cut because it starts off with a bang, baby)

In your current predicament, the world has narrowed down to two things. The vulnerability of your body, and the total neediness of your cunt.

The two are most certainly related. Ivar is not one to make idle threats. When he told you over the phone that he believed you deserved punishment . . . it seems that he had immediately started making plans.

You’re alone, now, helpless on your own bed. Of course, it’s Hvitserk’s bed, this week. Ivar has bound your wrists to your ankles, and pointed you with your spread legs aimed right at the door. The open door.

What a sight Hvitserk is going to see when he walks in.

“You know you deserve this,” Ivar had said, trussing you up with methodical fingers. The way that he took your clothes from you, you’re not sure you’re going to get them back until Hvitserk’s no longer in town. “You had freedom, and you wasted it. Now you have to understand that you are here for our pleasure. Not the other way around. This pussy,” he said, giving it a sudden rub followed by a quick slap, “is here for our use. So . . . I’m not letting you use anything else for a little while.”

Your hands are tied to the insides of your ankles. You can try closing your legs, but your thighs won’t come quite back together with your arms bound right there in the way. Lying on your back as you are, the slit of your swollen pussy lips would still be visible between your raised legs to anyone standing in the doorway anyway. So why bother.

He had assured you that he would make sure Hvitserk “stumbled in” fairly soon, before you got too stiff in this humiliating pose. But you’re sure he’s going to stretch out the suspense as long as he thinks you can handle it.

You rock your body anyway, fruitlessly seeking just a little relief. After opening you up, Ivar had carefully applied a liberal helping of lube all over your pussy, inside and out. “I want you wet and ready for him.” A bullet vibrator came next, positioned carefully on top of your clit by a small shibari harness wrapped around your upper thighs and waist. “I am not turning this up high enough to make you come,” he said, matter-of-factly. “You are not to come until your punishment is over. This is here merely to keep you focused.”

And fuck, are you focused. You’re cursing yourself for allowing Ivar to learn your body so well, to know just exactly how high he can turn up the vibration without pushing you over the edge. And the pattern, fuck, that pulsing, wavelike rrrm, Rrrm, RRRM is damned hypnotic. You can’t possibly ignore it. And yet you want to sob every time the wave crests too soon, the intensity dropping well before the tension building between your thighs has anywhere to go.

An even more powerful thrill rushes through your body as you hear movement at the door. Lifting your head from the mattress, you see Hvitserk’s eyes widen, his steps arrested on his way into the room. He does a doubletake before his brain can fully process the obscenity he’s truly seeing in front of him. He glances back down the hallway, then slides inside and shuts the door with a shark’s smile spreading across his face.

“You seem to be kind of stuck, Y/N.” His eyes roam over the backs of your thighs, and what’s on display in between. There’s no way not to feel completely, horribly exposed to him. It’s so hot you’re probably about to start dripping all over the sheets. “Can I help you?”

You look him right in the eyes. “I need to be fucked.”

“Oh yeah?” he asks, settling down on his knees beside the bed, definitely not lining up to drive himself into you like you so desperately need.

“Yeah.” You nod, quickly. “I need it bad.”

You arc and whine when Hviterk’s fingers slide around your opening, gliding between your outer and inner lips. “You’re wet enough for me to believe you.” The pads of his fingers dip inside, but only shallowly, stretching the rim of your opening in a wide swirl.

“Fuck,” you sob. That’s a lot of entirely unsatisfying stimulation right there. You need to feel filled up, not stretched out. “Please, Hvitserk. I’m here for your use, so use me, fuck me, put me out of my misery.” You have crane your neck to make eye contact with him, looking down the line of your body and between your own legs.

His eyes are dark as he stares at your naked and readied body, which shudders with the strength of your need. His eyes flit up to the ropes that bind each ankle to a wrist. “Ivar did this?”

“Yes.”

His fingers slide along the thinner cord tying the vibrator down onto your clit.

“He said it’s my lesson. I need you to fuck me until I learn.” Having to explain this to Hvitserk somehow makes your predicament all the hotter.

Hvitserk moves in closer, until you can see his face between your ankles and don’t have to contort your neck so badly anymore. “That’s what Ivar wants.” His softly scratchy voice adds weight and intimacy to his words. “But what do you want?”

His fingers are still just teasing, up and down and around your entrance. He hasn’t even taken his dick out. “Fuck! Did he send you in here to test me or something?” You’re starting to feel desperate. “This isn’t about obedience, Hvitserk. I need to be used. I want it this way. I-I just want you to fuck me like a toy.”

“That’s it?” he asks, a wicked gleam flashing through his deep-set eyes. “All this” he gestures at your body “is just here for me to play with?”

“Uh huh.”

He grins and nips at your inner thighs, and finally presses two of those long fingers into your pussy.

You throw your head back and keen your pleasure.

He toys with you, for a while. The relief of friction, of satisfying depth and pressure, starts to give way to fear that he might accidentally push you into orgasm before Ivar had permitted it. That hadn’t sounded like it would be such a hard rule to follow, when you thought that Hvitserk was going to come in here like the horny bro he’d been acting like before, and just sink his eager cock straight into you.

But even when there’s no contest to be won, Hvitserk evidently loves getting up close and personal with the pussy. He pulls his fingers out just to bring them to his lips, plunging them into his own mouth to taste you with a little savoring sound as he locks a promising look onto your eyes.

He’s not done. Hvitserk’s fingers slide under the ropes that bind the vibrator against your clit, then he’s pushing them out of his way and removing it.

You sigh, relieved to be free of the temptation and missing it immediately at the same time.

But then Hvitserk’s mouth replaces the device. And this is not just a taste. This is business, the same masterful pace and pressure that won him the contest earlier.

“No . . .” you wail at him, drowning under your own conflicting needs. “No, Hvitserk, Ivar said not to.”

He lifts his head just barely far enough to answer you, so that you can feel his breath against your slick and sensitive parts with every word. “I’m supposed to use you how I want, right? And what I want to do is eat this pussy like a birthday cake.”

“You can’t,” you insist. “I’m not allowed to come!”

He barely hesitates. “But I want you to,” he says, voice breathy and urgent. And he begins another round of his very best work.

There’s not really any other type of ordeal quite like this one. Pleasure blooms, white-hot and urgent, beneath Hvitserk’s tongue, and you can do nothing but grit your teeth and try to push it back. You could use your safeword if this was truly bothering you, Ivar had told you that Hvitserk was informed how that works. But this is a challenge you prefer to ride out, come what may.

You know Ivar well enough to be sure that he’s monitoring this, although you don’t see him darkening the doorway this time when you strain your neck to look. Perhaps he’s waiting just outside the door. Or hell, maybe the walls just are as thin as the boys keep saying. Either way, it makes you want to do him proud. Show him you can endure even this absolutely torturous pleasure, and follow his command despite it.

You manage to hold out, though internally you’re screaming. Your body is clenched in a line of sheer, stubborn tenacity against that insistent rapture when Hvitserk finally gives up, swiping his face with the back of his arm as he stands up. “Fine. Is this what you want?” He pulls out his dick, proud and rock-solid with a bit of a graceful curve toward the tip. He gives himself a crude stroke. “On to the main course, then.”

You sob your victorious agreement.

He grabs a rubber. Ivar had literally left a bowl of condoms right next to you, on top of a guest towel. It doesn’t get much more demeaning than that.

Hvitserk whips his shirt off and then leans over you, ready cock bobbing, and grasps one of your swaying feet in each hand. “This is so fuckin’ hot,” he intones, staring at the ropes. “Can you handle it if I leave you like this while we fuck?”

You let out a shaky breath and agree. You’ll stretch out later. This is, just as Hvitserk said, too fuckin’ hot.

The angle has your hips turned up rather sharply. He misses on his first attempt to enter you, cock slipping off your lubricated lips. He mutters an obscenity and then laughs it off, reaching down to line himself up better with an endearingly self-deprecating smirk.

It’s fun to watch him handle himself. You can’t do much to help the process, your body positioned precisely how Ivar wanted you left, with very little wiggle room. A lock of dirty blonde hair falls into his face as he peers down and lifts up onto his tiptoes to drive himself downward into your body.

It just got real, now. There’s nothing more grounding than an urgent cock pressing deep, deep inside.

Hvitserk leans over you, eyes going wide and tight around the edges as he sinks all the way into your aching pussy. “Fuck, you’re so fucking tight like this.”

Your eyes bulge a little as you agree. This angle makes you feel full as hell.

Hvitserk stares down into your face as he starts moving his hips. That eye contact of his, fuck. You’re not sure how to handle it. Somehow it feels more intimate than the rubbing of your naughty bits together. He fucks down into you with an increasing pace, his lips curling up in a cheeky smile. “This is it, huh?” he glances down, looking at the way your tits bounce between your imprisoned arms, at your upturned cunt swallowing his cock down. “What you were begging for.” He interrupts himself with a sigh and a smile, bites his lip as he repeats an angle that must be particularly good for him.

“Fuck, yes,” you say, relishing the relentless depth of every one of his increasingly-wild strokes. “Use me.”

He puts one knee up on the bed, balancing the movement by wrapping an arm around your raised leg, and deepens the already-maddening intensity of the position. He groans with abandon above you, guttural sounds as he does exactly what you’ve encouraged him to do. You let him rut into you with no concern for anything else at all, neither your comfort or your pleasure. It’s worth it; the rush of this feels better than any soft, candlelit evening you could get out of a partner that was focused only on making you feel good. This is so much more complex; it scratches a deep itch you couldn’t even begin to explain, to let every boy in this apartment use your body according to their own wild and selfish desires.

Hvitserk is going to come soon. You can tell by the way his face is twisting to one side, almost wincing, the pleasure apparent in the wild sparkling of his eyes as he continues to attempt to hold onto your gaze even through all of this. You can hear it in the way his grunting breaths are matching the rhythm of his strokes, and the way his thrusts have gone from fluid to insistent, driving at a tight, brutal angle so deep that you swear he’s going to hit your backbone.

He invokes your name like a curse when he finally blows, drawing it out into a long and ragged sound. He can’t keep his eyes open for that moment, making you feel like you can finally catch your breath just as he’s losing his.

He shudders inside you, sealing himself in deep as he comes down from it. He’s propped his weight onto one hand that presses into the mattress just beside your head, so you don’t have much of anywhere to look aside from his heavy brow as he sags in the air right above you.

This time Ubbe’s not ready and waiting. You can’t see the doorway, but if Ivar’s there he has yet to announce himself. This time Hvitserk gets to stay nestled inside you as long as he wants, and you catch your breaths together.

When he lifts his head, his eyes are glittering with easy mirth and hints of something deeper. You smile back, squeezing your inner arms into contact with his body. It’s the closest to a hug you can do in these restraints.

Hvitserk turns his head, following the line of your arm up to ropes that connect it to your ankle. “Let’s get you out of those,” he says gently. He withdraws his cock with a shaky breath and eases himself back up to standing. “I can’t believe you—” his mouth is set at a wry angle and he shows his awe in a little shake of his head. “I’m sorry I—”

He’s cut off by Ivar’s return, his voice a sharp, loud contrast that instantly shifts the mood. “Leave those, Hvitserk. I will handle that.”

Hvitserk had just been reaching for your ankle. He drops his arm and melts back a bit.

“Did you enjoy my gift?” Ivar asks, stepping in between the two of you. He sets his crutch so he can stand more solidly beside the bed, and looks you over. His eyes crackle with a deep blue fire at whatever mess he sees in your face, and the expanse of your naked skin. When Hvitserk doesn’t give much of a response, Ivar moves to loosen the rope at your closest ankle. “Would you like to help me give her the rest of her punishment now?” He spares one pointed glance for his brother. “You are the wronged party, after all.”

“That wasn’t the punishment.” He looks at Ivar with a raised brow.

“Of course not. She loved that.” Ivar says, matter-of-factly, and then his whole face breaks out in his evilest grin.

Next Chapter

Link to my other Hvitserk fics

#hvitserk/reader #hvitserk/you #hvitserk x reader #hvitserk imagine #hvitserk smut #playing house fic

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rinharu-purple · 3 years

Note

Emmm 👉👈 can i request Gavin's spring festival date analysis?! Ehem especially when Gavin said "I've waited a long time for today.." 💙

But Of course if you're not busy.. I'll wait patiently.. I just.. love read your analysis 💙 like i can feel your love and dedication for Gavin.. a lot of Gavin stan is very smart and loyal.. just like Gavin itself

Hello nonny and of course you can! Thank you for your lovely ask and reading my posts. It makes me really happy to hear this 💞 I can also double up what you've said, Our birdcop is smart and loyal and I really love being a part of Gavin-standom which includes so many talented writers, artists, analysts and it has @cheri-translates! There are so many great posts from various accounts and one can feel the love, passion and loyalty towards Gavin in all of them! 💫

An analysis on Spring Festival date is so overdue, so it is me who should apologize for not having written this before. I will more than gladly include your request scene, I hope you enjoy it ^_^

MC Testing Waters: Spring Festival Date

At the beginning of the game, MC is a young woman with lots of love in her heart, however without much experience in love. Fortunately this starts to change when she meets LIs as adults.

Spring Festival Date takes place after Firework Date and before the Romantic Date, although the timeline is quite messy, which I will come to by the end of this analysis.

If you look closely, you can see MC checking Gavin's romantic feelings towards her by using this "boyfriend game" and also uses the opportunity to get beyond his hardened exterior and touch his vulnerable side 💗

Spoilers start below this line

This date comes to, because MC lies to her aunt about having a boyfriend to avoid arranged blind dates and even promises to visit her on New Years with her boyfriend. Speculatively it seemed like a solid play, until...the time literally came.

Thinktanking about a way out of this with Kiki and Willow, they weight different options as to tell them she broke up with him, leave the city or call in sick but then the best wingman on earth Minor saves the way and suggests that she just takes a "fake boyfriend" with her, surely enough with Gavin in his mind.

MC goes through her contacts list to search for a suitable candidate, but her heart Whispers her the answer by skipping a beat as her fingertips scroll down to one name.

... Gavin

As such... MC has chosen her player for the game and Gavin's Heart Trial with MC's family commences...

---Press Start---

Creativity Test

Unluckily Gavin actually shows up for this highly important date late, with his phone off! From the storyline he arrives a couple of minutes late to MC’s aunt's place, thus starting the game one point behind. He was late because he was buying presents for the whole family! With the spot on gifts which are well received by the family because they're expensive, imported goods, limited products, cute and thoughtful he makes up for the lost points.

But it's just the first stage and he has 3 more stages to clear, the pressure is slowly rising.

This gray suit has a lovely story behind it, which you can find by the end of the story.

Decision Test

Gavin has passed the creativity test with flying colors, but in the second stage more challenging questions are on the menu. The eldest aunt wants to know Gavin's age, occupation, salary(?!) and possessions(?!). The last two questions are fairly over the line and is a no-no in my country. Asking people about their financial status as well as bragging about it is perceived as rude and insolent, that's why the way Gavin answers these questions skillfully without bragging about his wealth adds just another brick on my Gavin-temple.

Age: 24

Occupation: Police Officer

Salary: Covers the bills

Possessions: A flat in the city and a motorcycle.

In my Prank date analysis, I've mentioned about Gavin's ability to deal with impertinence and also here, he stays friendly, but only answers the questions necessary to get through with the situation. MCs family is checking whether he's wealthy enough to take care of MC (which is sad that in the 21st century that in some countries women need to be financially secured by men). So Gavin just gives them just the right enough of information to pass the test and pass he does.

There is another aspect to his way of answering though. You see, Gavin is an unmaterialistic man. He doesn't care about money or any other meta. He doesn't touch upon the fact that he's coming from a wealthy family, or that he inherits his grandparents house or that he can afford designer dresses, overseas travels or gems without giving a second thought. That shows just how humble Gavin is and I love him for it. What defines him is not his wealth, nor does he allow anyone define him on his financial status. It's his character, the values he stand for, the vision he embodies, the way he treats MC.. Ehm.. And.. His champion body and drop dead gorgeous looks (comes as an extra;))

But the game is far from over, because the family council is now going to challenge him on...

Affinity Test

This is where things get rosy as the family would like to know how they've met and whether they've been together since high school.

Look, Gavin is actually not playing a game, but living the moment. He is well aware of the fact that once he and MC become an official pair, he will be standing on the same spot a year later. He is serious...

So when they ask about their affection, he gives them his genuine answer and confesses his crush on her during high school and says that they've been going out since fall. This dazzles MC, as if she hasn't been dazzled enough lol.

The three glasses of drink he gulps surely has a role in this sincerity and taking three glasses of a drink as a punishment also becomes a tradition for MC and Gavin in the future.

And so, he proudly passes the Affinity Test with flying colors, effortlessly. Only one more stage and he's done it!

Execution Test

Every hero has his moment, when the fight takes a gloomier turn against his favor and the odds don't look good as before when he gets a strong blow, that is when the family hits him with the question "Don't you get alone well with your family?".

This is Gavin's weak spot, his cryptonite, his bleeding wound and MC's family just pressed on it. What makes this scene so heartbreaking is not just the topic itself and we know why it is a sensitive topic for Gavin but also that Gavin actually tries to signal them that this is not his favorite topic. He tells them he doesn't go home for holidays (friendly warning number 1), the aunties pushes by telling him to take some meal with him to which he replies "Thanks, but that's okay. I've been away for a long time" (friendly warning number 2) the family pushes further and as a one last resort he tells them that during college he rarely went there and spent holidays working afterwards (friendly warning number 3). Sadly the auntie than ignorantly ask whether his family doesn't worry about him and now because he's given three fair warning shots which, he downright gives them a brief and resolute answer:

- No.

That's usually the latest where people with common sense stop digging in further. Unfortunately then the auntie asks whether he doesn't get along well with his family to which Gavin no longer responds. This is the perfect way of dealing with such people and Gavin has a very intuitive talent for dealing different people from different mindsets. Give them three friendly and fair warnings, still pushing? Then give them a last chance by one final brief and to the point answer, they choose to ignore the signal? Stop interacting, you can only waste time beyond this point.

The only problem with this situation here, is that these people are not just somebody, Gavin wants to win these people over, so he cannot just ignore them. But also he cannot do it without a timeout, so he goes to grab some wine. (God it makes me so sorry everytime he has to face his family drama or is misjudged. I just wanna hug him bring him hot cocoa, give him a backrub and bring spicy food for him. Luckily he has MC ^_^)

But let's not talk only about about Gavin, because MC is struggling too. And we should recognize her stick up for him with the most cherishing words:

-Auntie, you got it wrong. He is a decent and pure man and has come to my aid many time and in quite dangerous circumstances.

When she comes back however cannot find Gavin, once she does, a heartwarming moment blooms between them.

This scene is very crucial in Gavin and MC's relationship because this is the first time MC sees Gavin tired and flustered. She feels sad for him but also happy for herself, for she feels as though she gets closer to him, thus seeing the real Gavin. By the way she show him her genuine care, Gavins heart melts and kisses the back of her hand as a gesture and so the first intimate moment involving them having a kiss ensues. Furthermore, they show each other their mutual care, which brings them one step closer and this gives Gavin the only courage he needs to tackle the situation.

When our hero gets the courage and the stamina he need from his girl, nothing can stop him now. Having gatherer his strength, Gavin returns to the dinner table:

“I am so happy to be here with you all today. In fact, I haven't felt this atmosphere of family in a long time. I have a very strict father and a brother I seldom see...I don’t even know when I turned into such a loner. Eating alone, sleeping alone, doing everything alone...until I met her. It was a beautiful autumn day. The gingko leaves were floating in the wind. I was also going through a pretty dark time. But she saved me before I hit bottom...It’s she who told me I could live a stronger life. And it’s also she who told me I could live a more tender life. I never felt lonely before, until I met her. I started to get used to star-gazing with her, having dinner with her, spending the New Year’s with her. In the future, I'll give it my all to stay with her, to take good care of her and love her. I wanna make up many times over for all the times I wasn't there”

MC’s heart stopped, aunties eyes teary, the elder Aunt want his actions to back up these words and thus Gavin has a pass from MC's family. Now that he's won the game, it's time to collect his prize.

After they leave MC's aunt's house, our lovebirds walk together in the night full of fireworks and Gavin tells Mc that Minor has mentored him on being the perfect son-in-law, hence he was late. He also asks her what she would do if he didn't show up, to which she says that her intuition says that he won't fail her and he murmurs quietly:

- I've waited a long time for today.

Of course he doesn't repeats himself when MC asks him about what he just said. But that's what kept him going all night long.

He has waited for six whole years to meet her again, to stand by here, take good care of her and love her. Tonight, he could do them all by being her "boyfriend", giving his word to her family and having their blessings. He could see that she also cares a lot for him, worries about him and wants to be there for him. He landed his lips for the first time on her delicate skin and could give her warmth.

He could finally confess his feelings for her and say the genuine things he will only say to her.

So yes, he has waited for a long time for this moment to come and when it came, he made sure to grab it tightly.

----—----—---

Timeline issues:

- The order of the dates in the game doesn't always reflect the real course of events. The grey suit that Gavin wears is actually bought after Romantic Date, which takes place after this date.

-Even though MC plans this whole game to avert blind dates, but she still gets set up later on a blind date by another aunt lol.

Thank you once again for your patience nonny and I hope that the analysis proves to be worthy of your wait 💗

Masterlist

For MC's confession let me take you here

For Gavin and MCs relationship milestones here

For a fun trivia about this date you can click here

#Meeting the family is important #Gavin preparing for being the perfect son in law #And getting help from Minor #Anon asks #mlqc #mlqc gavin #mlqc bai qi #mlqc haku #mlqc baek gi #mr love queen's choice #koi to producer #Meta #Analysis #Saturday night #Saturday

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dirtyrottenraskel · 3 years

Text

my take on yueki's personalities

yue

notes / personality

cocky (but also like understated confidence - r e g a l af)

kind of a nerd

maybe a little entitled, and a little bratty and suki loves to indulge her or to rile her up depending on her mood

books

seems soft but made of steel

strong sense of duty

socially intelligent - can be manipulative and suki (the dork) thinks it is so hot

aloof queen bee typa beat

supportive, both in ur day to day and in going after your big moral life goals

deep water - steady and powerful, often underestimated

untold depths, private yet surprisingly nurturing - master of deflecting away from herself

political nerd - well read, and when she has someone she trusts not to take advantage of her, she goes OFF

distrusting of most people, has been used and ignored and underestimated her whole life

patient - homegirl knows how to play the long game

excellent at pai sho / chess

she and suki have epic battles of wits - dif types of strategy but both are really into it and get a little too competitive (multiple board games have had to be replaced over the years)

loves travel bc wasn’t allowed to much, esp when she was sick

was super repressed growing up - never let her be herself or really have any sort of independence

used to sneak out and wander around in rebellion and casually sabotage plans and decisions she didn’t agree with

introverted, many opinions but keeps them to herself, discreet but well spoken

weaponizes secrets and information - doesn’t often use it but...she could

definitlyyyyy worries and overthinks and re-evaluates - worries ab social politics a lot

obsessive about picking things - wants it to be perfect

shes growing into her confidence as a leader

prefers quite intimate places

incredibly romantic

classic lit

planner for the future - visionary

kind / sweet / gentle - yes, but that’s also her “front” to a degree (seriously, i feel like she gets painted as so sweet and submissive and one dimensional by the fandom a lot of times and it freakin kills me)

INFJ-T (The Advocate) ((yes this is from 16p which i know is not super accurate but u can still catch her overall vibes from it ya know)

Creative/insightful/principled/compassionate/altruistic

sensitive/reluctant to open up/perfectionist/prone to burnout/not a fan of the ordinary

friendships / relationships

(<> indicates that they’re one of her best friends)

sokka - puppy love crushes, laugh ab it now, get into deep late night talks about responsibilities and leading, water tribe culture, prank wars (no one believes sokka when he says yue is a mean prank master (expect suki comes to see it in action lol))

katara - <> badass women friendship, totally would go to matches and protests together, tough girl shit, waterbending practice/duels - start of cautious, but then get rough in a good way bc they trust each other, they do water tribe food adventures together

toph - indulges her chaos, bonding over stupid royal upbringings, odd yet weirdly endearing pair

zuko - both sort of standoffish gay royals, but once they come to see that they are friends - take up similar spaces though, so only hang out in a group or rarely by themselves, they do hang out at like political parties and stuff when they get more comfortable together

aang - <> he has an impressive world view, yue is super studied and well read, so she and aang nerd out over past cultures together, and also their peace keeping nature, they have tea together often - usually after she and katara wipe the floor w/ each other

clothing / aesthetic:

blues and pale colors

classy and understated wealth

like those cute feminine button down shirts

dresses

like cold weather classy

complicated braids

sort of soft girl aesthetic?

pleated skirts !!!

i feel like she would wear ethically sourced fur (i don’t wear fur but idk how to get it in an ethical way - maybe it’s just fake??)

knit sweaters and skinny jeans and heeled ankle boots

light academia !!!

hella funky earrings - to mark her native pride and also cuz gay

from my readings, tattoos have a lot of cultural significance for Inuit women, and so i feel like yue would totally have some (when she comes of age ofc)

suki

notes / personality

extroverted

also very strategic

more spontaneous tho - will totally calculate the odds in a spilt second in her head and then just go for it

like still a careful planner, but willing to say fuck it, yolo if it seems right

reflects on her mistakes, but more in like a healthy way - unless it was a leadership mistake, then it eats her up inside - worries more ab keeping her girls safe and making the right call

likes lively places

total bashful romantic

manages the present and the short term - realist

loves to do lists

a little punch happy - loves to make violent threats, but also does it out of excitement and she’s just a really physical person tbh

steady, can come off as stubborn and abrasive but she really just wants what’s best for everyone she loves

harsh on herself and worries about her girls a lot

always ends up in the oddest situations

totally would kick someone’s ass for being racist/sexist/homophobic/etc

dedicated to her training and her regime

not a great cook, but she can manage

would drink monsters

has a weird relationship with femininity - took her awhile to reconcile strength and toughness and being assertive and aggressive with also wanting to feel pretty and feminine and embracing being a girl and how those things can coincide and amplify each other

abandonment issues - parents absent/dead

was imprisoned - obvi she had several almost successful escape attempts, but she got really close to breaking

was incredibly independent really early, grew up really fast and tries to make up for that now by sometimes being reckless

tough/assertive/woman of action

dry sense of humor/sarcastic - not good at nickname/pun humor tho

practical/dedicated/strong-willed/direct/honest/reliable/loyal/patient

stubborn/judgmental/difficult to relax/difficulty expressing emotions/too selfless

friendships / relationships

(<> indicates that they’re one of her best friends)

sokka - <> man they’re like platonic soulmates - she beat him up, and now they spar all the time, totally funny and crack jokes all the time, go skating together, they do shitty art together, and then show their lovers after zuko and yue come back from their high society mixers, broke her out of prison, m/f friendship !!!

katara - also sparring buddies (suki will throw down at any literally moment (and tbh so will katara)), not close but will hang in a group - go to each other for advice

toph - <> listen these two wreak havoc together, they help each other out a lot, i feel like they’re shopping buddies (similar enough style to frequent the same shops) toph knows suki won’t judge her for wanting to feel pretty and suki knows toph will be honest, they are both blunt sarcastic assholes and get along like a house on fire

zuko - <> shows zuko how to like,,,enjoy things (and how to let go of some of that pressure to be always right and the adult and in charge bc they were raised with so much responsibility on their shoulders even tho they were just kids)? she is also super protective of him (once she trusts him), one of the only ppl who can match suki fully in hand to hand combat, both do the Disappointed Parent Look when the group falls into chaos, but by themselves, the two of them end up in hijinks

aang- suki enjoys his optimism and they’re just chill bros, they love exploring abandoned placed together

clothing / aesthetic

sporty and skater mixed

ripped jeans, crewnecks, vans

green and yellow and dark red

gym clothes/athleisure - lifting style gym clothes - cut off t-shirts and bike shorts

skirts too, likes to play into femininity

she’s a gold jewelry kinda girl - but stuff that won’t hinder her movements

necklaces that end in the hollow of her throat & occasionally rings

definitely cuffs all of her jeans (it’s just bisexual culture ya know)

so many crop tops - some came like that, some were more of a diy project

yueki’s relationship!!!

nerd/jock solidarity

feel the burden of responsibility and the weight on their shoulders

they create a safe space between them, full of trust and warmth and vulnerability

yue will read suki sappy passages from poetry books while suki polishes her fans

they slow dance in the kitchen a lot

they get good at ordering takeout - and they have some weird decision making process that only they understand - bc neither of them are great cooks

yue would feel jealous of suki and sokka, if it weren’t for how stupid in love sokka was with zuko and yue can see that suki really only has eyes for her

yue is taller than suki and it amuses her to no end to pick suki up and carry her away from a fight (we all know suki could get away if she wanted to, but when ur hot tall sexy gf throws u over her shoulder,,,,,,u don’t complain)

joke they’ve adopted kataang and zukka, bc they’re all dummies, but in reality every last one of them is stupid LMAO

they love to do each other’s hair and it’s like super intimate and really cute

sometimes it’s these epic elaborate hairstyles and then at other times, they try to see how many ponytails they can fit on suki’s head and how many little braid yue can do

they travel EVERYWHERE

since yue is royalty and suki is her body guard,,,, well i mean, they totally have to see these kingdoms they are doing trade deals with in person

it helps that they're friends with a lot of them

they stay over in everything from camping so they can stargaze to ritzy hotels with hot tubs in the bathroom

yue gives suki rocks she finds on all their travels and suki lines them up on their mantle around the pictures of them in increasingly weird locations

suki loves guarding yue’s meetings bc she gets to watch her absolutely rip a new one into misogynistic old men and it never fails to bring her joy

While yue doesn’t love getting attacked, the ruthless efficiency suki defends her with is like,,,,,stupid attractive

#wow this got long #this is a mix of modern au and canon verse headcanons #but yeah #let these girls have more dimension than just soft uwu gfs #esp yue #yueki #headcanon #atla #yue #suki #yue x suki #wlw #zukka #kataang #sapphic

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turtletimewriting · 3 years

Note

roceit? >w<

1. Who has the cutest tickle laugh?

I feel like I’m giving the exact same answer for this question but god dammed! Of course they would absolutely adore each other’s laughs! Roman has grown used to faking a laugh and just acting happier than he really is about whatever is happening. So to break through that and hear some genuine happy loud laughter makes Janus’ day! He especially loves when he’s stopped tickling and Roman keeps giggling minutes after. His giggles are just so sweet and joyful but the fact they’ll die down and then he’ll burst into laughter all over again despite not tickling him anymore!

But Janus makes a very big deal out of only evil cackling and when he’s with the others, he tends to only act serious and quiet. So to see him alone, frantically giggling and out loud key smashing when Roman wiggles his fingers at him! His loud belly laughter is the best of course but there is a special part of his heart that is reserved for Janus’ hissy giggles!

2. Who is ticklish in unusual places and where would that be?

Not really an unusual place but I cannot stress enough just how weak to leg tickles Janus truly is. He’s snek! Sneks don’t have legs! And so that means Janus’ has the most ticklish legs ever. It’s not a death spot or anything but everything from his knees to his calves to his thighs are incredibly ticklish! One big long tickly spot! Roman’s favourite thing in this entire world is when Janus wears his skirt (cough cough, I’m waiting mr Sanders) and that leaves his legs vulnerable to attack. He could be walking to the kitchen and he knows it’s only a matter of time when he’ll feel Roman attack his legs with a feather duster.

3. Who gets cheer-up tickles?

Roman, absolutely. Janus recognises early on just how much work and effort Roman puts into everything he does and a lot of it is criticised or outright denied. Roman at first doesn’t see this at all. “It’s my job, of course I’m going to get turned down. Why would an essential part of my job upset me?” but Janus puts his foot down. After an idea is turned down, regardless of how much work it was, and sits him down for a self care session. Janus will pull him into his lap to receive all the tickles and kisses. Then after he’s all tuckered out, Janus will paint his nails. Eventually, Roman looks forward to having a hard day’s work rewarded with tickles and a soft session with his soft snakey boyfriend.

4. Who takes advantage of the other one getting their arms stuck while taking off their shirt?

Janus is always targeted. His cape makes it harder to tickle his sides and even his tummy because Janus will absolutely curl up into a protected fortress of cape. So Roman has to pick his moments where he’s truly vulnerable. A perfect moment for that is when he’s getting dressed. The only problem is that Roman thinks he’s being sneaky but Janus knows exactly what Roman does. He has woken up before shouting “Oh wait! Are you changing yet! Wait, wait, wait! I need to get into place!” while he scrambled out of bed and perched like a pouncing kitten right behind him. Janus knows exactly why Roman targets him in the morning and if he takes a little bit longer to get dressed or be noisy so to wake up Roman, then that’s for his information.

5. How did they discover each other’s ticklishness?

I feel like it would be early on in their relationship, or maybe before they started dating, Janus declared who could only date someone who he knew all of the weaknesses of. Roman who was just sitting there eating a breakfast bar is just like... okay? So he lists off allergies or just stuff he doesn’t like and eventually they work round to the question of “are you ticklish and if so where can make you cry?”. Janus then obviously has to doublecheck that he wasn’t lying. Of course.

In comparison, I really like the idea of Roman just presuming Janus isn’t ticklish for the longest time ever. Especially since Janus is more ticklish than Roman. I just really like the idea of Roman being gently tickled and him making some remark about how lucky Janus is for not being ticklish. But as he says that, he jokingly tickles over his knee. Resulting in a squealing Janus jumping fifteen feet in the air. I just like the exact opposites for their ticklishness.

6. Who can’t take tickle bites?

Roman but that’s only because Janus is the master. Again, he’s snek! Sneks are great are tickly nibbles! What’s even better is that Roman literally never expects it! There’s never anything that sets it off. He’s never particularly vulnerable but he still manages to strike! He’ll be lying in bed sleepily and then all of a sudden his boyfriend is buried under the covers attacking his belly. He’s making dinner and then an arm turns off the oven and tickly nibbles are kissing up and down his neck. Sometimes, Roman thinks Janus just likes having something to nibble on as they will be sitting there and he’ll nibble gently on his wrist before diving for his sides.

7. Who has to be tickle-forced out of bed in the morning?

Janus. Both of them get up at a similar time but it’s during winter when the evil snek boi wants to sleep for 30 hours a day. To make it worse, Janus wraps up during winter, fluffy socks, five blankets and two pairs of pjs on at the same time- he thinks he’s completely safe from all and any tickles. Surely, right? Welp no! Roman is too determined to ever let that stop him! Every day he has to find a new way to penetrate the fortress of warm to wake him up. Sometimes he’ll tickle the palm of his hand, sometimes his little sock covered feet are peaking from the covers, the best days are when he can gently peel away the blankets and get access to a little scaley tummy.

8. Who gives up in a tickle fight?

Listen... unstoppable force meets unmovable rock. Janus is way too evil to be defeated, do you not see his cape! Roman is way too noble of a hero to accept defeat, do you not see all his princeliness! Who gives up during the tickle fights is Virgil who just wants a peaceful morning and he storms into their room to break up the tickle fight. Both of them are crying with laughter as Roman squeezes his knees and Janus’ hands are stuck under Roman’s arms. Neither of them have the breath to tease or appreciate each other’s laugh. Good vs evil and it turns out both of them are too stubborn and ticklish for tickle fights.

9. Who is in danger of getting hurt when attacking the other?

Janus but getting hurt doesn’t happen often. His scales can be quite sensitive and so it’s easy to irritate them or leave angry red scratch marks. Of course, this results in Roman gently brushing over his scales which is so so so much more ticklish than it should ever be. In terms of when attacking the other, I’d say neither? Roman is aware of his strength and takes pride in how long he can sit there and just take the tickles. Janus simply squirms but when it gets too much his fight or flight response just shouts at him to turn into a snake and disappear up Princey’s sleeve.

10. Who always provokes the other into tickling them and how?

Roman but I don’t think he realises. If I haven’t made it obvious by now, I’m in love with himbo Roman. I just love the idea of Roman loving tickles and unknowingly provoking tickles. In his mind he just thinks that people love tickling him a lot. He has no idea how walking into the living room wearing a crop top while stretching his arms over his head would ever provoke tickles. So what? He’s just walking around muttering away to himself about how his feet itch but he’s too ticklish to itch it. Why are you blushing so hard Janus? I’m just laying in your lap so my bare belly is sitting by your hands.

#janus sanders #deceit sanders #roman sanders #Tickling #TurtleTalking #headcanon #roceit

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musings-of-a-19yr-old · 2 years

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WELCOME TO #IMANI’S MUSINGS!

Welcome to Imani’s Musings; your #1 social commentary! You heard it here first(😉). From your host, ME; a self-inflicted outsider looking in, someone who is more often than not guilty of being a teensy bit too passive in her approach to life; someone who rather than get in on all the action, ‘prefers’ to watch ‘safely’ from the sidelines. In truth maybe it’s because I’m a little too scared to go out into the real world and fully immerse myself in the land of the living. Maybe because I’m terrified of rolling the dice every single day to see which experience I’ll have to settle for today; beauty? joy? pain? an up or down? a high or low? failure? success? Love? Hate? Adoration or Discrimination? The good, the bad, or the ugly? Will it be a dream come true day, a nightmare when it rains it pours day, a meh day, or all of them wrapped into one day?

So I limit myself to watching life from the sidelines, isolating myself, withdrawing from the rest of the world, and retreating into the cocoon of my imagination fearful of being rejected, of being told my screwball personality, and wear-my-heart-on-my-sleeve countenance are too messy, too awkward, too much to handle.

Interestingly enough, I have found comfort in writing, journaling, and using Plain-Ol words to create depth, meaning, belonging, nostalgia, and most importantly hope! Hope that I will one day be able to overcome the inertia with which I currently approach my life. The process of arousing the suppressed feelings buried deep within me, pooling together the most random collection of words to develop a stream of consciousness that adequately captures my inner turmoil, fills me with sweet cathartic relief, to say the least. Thankfully it also helps my over-active, hypersensitive, HSP brain to cope with the extra-loud, sometimes hostile, in-your-face, and confrontational physical environment by allowing me to break down the countless bits of overwhelming sensory information mercilessly flung my way, each and every day by the real world, into smaller digestible pieces. Interestingly enough this recently re-discovered hobby has become the source of my empowerment, my strength! My means of communicating with the outside world, my way of interacting with my fellow human beings who I yearn to connect with so dearly, to love, exchange camaraderie with, laugh with, hold hands with, hug, and share the deepest parts of myself with. BUT but who are more often than not put off by the aloof, reserved mask of shyness that I put on to shield my sensitive, introverted, spirited, idealistic soul.

The words on the page give me a voice, who would’ve thought that my imagination would be the key to unearthing this newfound feeling of confidence, that was previously so foreign to me. When I write I’m no longer the timid, socially awkward girl struggling to live up to the demands and pressures of our fast-paced, ever-changing, technology-reliant, 21st-century social life, I’m no longer an outsider looking in, I’m just your resident wordsmith, romanticist, screwball, HSP, young at heart but an old soul, overthinking-insomniac, with a wear-my-heart-on-my-sleeve countenance. It’s a lot, I know.🙈🙈🙈

Just kidding😅. Slowly but surely writing is helping me to not only discover myself but also to appreciate this person that I am discovering myself to be, instead of chasing this idealized image of perfection that I have in my head of who I think I am supposed to be. Most importantly I have discovered that only by laying bare my soul for all to see, only by showing glimpses of vulnerability, only by admitting to others that I am flawed, as counter-intuitive as it may seem will people ever truly love me. (Not the mask I put on for them to see, or an idealized image they have in their heads of me, but the real, unwavering ME!).

Moreover, I have learned that as different as we all may seem, on the inside you and I are similar as can be quite literally! we are all souls housed in a body of cells and matter, we all bleed red, and we are all kept alive by our hearts beating on average 60 to seventy times per minute. We are also very similar in the more abstract sense of our need for touch, human connection, love, and affection, we all fear rejection, failure, and the thought of suppressing our true selves our entire lives in order to fit into the societal definition of what is acceptable, being unwanted, cast aside or shunned by our neighbors, countrymen, families, and peers, we all tremble at the thought of never finding our purpose, of floating through life feeling irrelevant, of not mattering, of not making an impact, at the thought of being instantly forgotten the moment we step out of a room, or worse yet being seemingly invisible the moment we step into the room, going through life without someone ever acknowledging our existence.

The point is I think it’s time for me to let my guard down, come out of my shell and you know start to explore the possibilities that life has to offer, my purpose, and potential paths for my future, cause if not now, at 19yrs of age (during my youth; the supposed prime of my life) then when!!! Anyway, I have decided to give this living life to the fullest thing a go more often and this blog is my way of inviting you along with me on my journey, letting my guard down, opening up, and, showing off my writing skills, if at all I have any😬😬😅

P/S: Your welcome!😏🙃😝

TTYL!!!!!

BYE FOR NOW👋😉

SO GLAD I GOT THAT OFF MY CHEST, Phew!!!😅😊

#self reflection #writers on tumblr #why am i like this #can anybody relate?#my notes #love yourself #empowereachother #live laugh love #my quirks #blackgirlmagic imani'smusings musingsofa19yrold

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hueningshaped · 4 years

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★ prince of the future | w.jh

▰ genre: fluff + idk what genre time travel is but uhhh

▰ word count: 3916 (FRICK)

▰ synopsis: the one where jun is a time traveler who shows up in your apartment having just returned from an ancient war and he was also a king and you introduce him to hot dogs and cell phones + female! reader + the one where reader has to catch up with jun being a time lord of some sorts

▰ notes: cross posted on wattpad | this is my first posted imagine/thing on here >___<

▰ possible warnings :: blood, wounds, food

There was absolutely no way that any of this was real, and if it even was, you perhaps should have dialed the emergency number quite a while ago. After all, there were many factors that affected your logic and sensitivity as you were sleep deprived and had just finished working a double shift.

"Once more, sweet miss, for your ease, are there any tourniquets present within your residence?" The young man pleaded, head hung down towards the wound that one of his hands were busy addressing, while the other bloodily leaned against your doorframe.

"I-I — " your jaw seemed to be jammed, tongue caught between your teeth because this was all too much to deal with. One second, you were trying to start up your record player and the next, you were temporarily blinded by a flash of light from your kitchen.

Nonetheless, you remained in your spot, half sprawled, half sat, upon the hardwood floor.

"I suppose I could just search it myself." His militaristic, shin-high boots clicked cleanly upon the once crystal clear, tile floor as he vanished into the hallway.

You had to face the facts: this guy was tall. His head barely missed the top of the doorframe. His diction and attire obviously furthered him from this era. Maybe he was just a medieval soldier reenactor, but that seemed unlikely. In fact, the whole situation seemed unlikely. An amply bleeding wound had erupted from his thigh, flushing in loose spots across your floor.

Were you seriously going to let a man step all over you even in the strangest of circumstances? Never: you had promised yourself you wouldn't go through this again.

He audibly seemed to be pulling drawers out from their initial piece, left and right, with the thunderous cascade of your paraphernalia and belongings. The blood led to the restroom. The reflection of the sanguine drew you closer, you discovered, after arming yourself. His broad shoulders shielded him from seeing you perhaps as you entered.

You were within an arm's reach, of knocking him out with a skillet, that you had grabbed soundlessly, before he had spun the opposite direction, grabbing you, to complete the rotation, before finally, he had you, as wild as it was, in his arms, mid-fall, with your arms locked around your own neck: the skillet now amongst the mess he had made.

New fact: he was absolutely beautiful.

His stunningly-lidded eyes consisted of something far more than your bewildered reflection but a glint of wonder, a glint of mischief. Fine bloodied lines etched the edges of his cheekbones, frequented the side of his left temple, and even smudged the corner of his full and bruised lips.

"Care to explain that?" He nudged his head towards the dropped cooking pan before meeting your eyes once more.

All you could muster was a sob as your face contorted itself in your rather pathetic, frightened expression.

"Please don't kill me! Please don't hurt me! Please, please, please!" Tears blurred your vision and if you didn't know any better, you would have confirmed that you had seen a pitiful look breathe over his features.

"Darling, darling, darling... Hush. I would never kill you. Besides, I am quite unfamiliar with the way this property functions. You shall be my guide." With that said, he loosened his lock on you and hoisted you over his shoulder, which should have, maybe, broke his entire body, yet the subtle grunt seemed to prove he wasn't superhuman. But what could he be?

"I will yell for help! I'll scream!" You continued, still untrusting, as he decided to move from your bathroom to your bedroom, which for the most part was proof of the child you were at heart.

"At least let me kill myself so you don't have to!" More tears came despite your sudden grip on the doorframe of your bedroom, with this man still tugging your body forward so you could let go, but that had to be your only strength since you had trouble letting go.

This struggle gave you enough time to throw your legs the other direction, running on the hallway wall, before wrapping your entire body around his neck. Immediately collapsing with him, you should have been able to ascend and speed away yet that move had literally taken all your strength. That was your workout for the...year probably.

The man sat up, coughing still, but this time, he spat some blood to his side, eyeing you over with a half startled yet impressed smirk.

"Look at you, little warrior," he cooed with his noble, caramel voice. "I do not know what I can possibly offer so as that you cease every attempt to kill me, which I deem unfair and even a bit hypocritical. I am Wen Junhui, time-traveling lord, not to mention that I just returned from 1334, from a battle within the Yuan Dynasty. The furthest I have ventured to your time was 1991, so please forgive me for my informalities. Please take care of me and I will simply be on my way, back to 1970."

Your head had to still be spinning. His determined look never ended with yours even as you slowly joined him, sitting up.

His right eye seemed to be engulfed in blood from perhaps a reopened wound on his temple, the trail dribbling down to his chin.

"What the fuck?" You exclaimed out of instinct.

"I beg your pardon?" It bothered you that he was way too hot to be speaking like some imperial reenactor. His lips should be spouting corny jokes, bad compliments, and maybe even singing a song. (Maybe they should be on yours.)

"There's no way any of that's true. I... did you drug me?" He rolled his eyes, fortunately with a small grin on his rugged face.

"I did no such thing. In fact, opium hasn't hit China yet. It is rather exhausting traveling from place to place, or should I say, time to time, so I have not delved into drugs. Nonetheless, I am severely wounded and my internal compass —" He paused to tap the centre of his chest, which clinked, in return. " - led me here. Please. I hope my pleas meet your grace."

One tenth of you screamed over your shoulder, accepting anything he would do to you. You sighed deeply, as if you had been served the greatest plate of disappointment, yet complying to the rest of you that exhaled kindness in breaths.

"You can do whatever, I guess. Just let me call my parents and tell them my goodbye's." You trailed off finally, rising from your state upon your knees only to fall back again since that quite literally took the air right out of you.

"Call? Are they present around one of these rooms? Hello?" He began hollering with an innocent light now softening his look, despite looking as he had just come from battle, which he had even said he did.

"No!" You laughed, wiping your nose with the back of your hand, before meeting his eyes once more. "With my phone? You know what telephones are, don't you?" You showed him your smartphone, waving it around for him, which seemed to dim everything around his your hand for his focus. So, it looked he absolutely no clue what it was.

"This must be the most lofty technological advancement yet. I have never seen anything so promising yet thrilling, besides you." He commented, almost in a sing-song voice.

"What?" You stammered, to which he shook his head as if dismissing your question

"The last I saw of this mechanism had to have been grand, heavy like a cantaloupe, and anything but this, really!" Junhui exclaimed excitedly like a child. How old was he even?

His blood continued beating upon the floor in minor dots, the warmth rippling down his leathered leg in thin streams.

"So, about the, uh, tourniquets? I got some bandages in my closet, if you'd like to follow me. I also have some other stuff if you want to look and pick through." Your voice fell quiet as his eyes never once ceased the contact with you.

"Stuff?" He blinked, reaching a hand down towards you. You obliged, slipping your hand into his, fingers gripping yours with gentle ferocity, which yanked you up immediately upon into his chest. It suddenly became hot.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," you pulled away, zipping off into your bedroom. The walls were adorned with Hello Kitty plushies and anime posters and the bed filled with stuffed animals. "R-right this way. Umm, feel free to sit on the bed."

You weren't as articulate as you would have hoped to be and you also noted that you were becoming rather obsessive over your own mannerisms.

The subtle squeak of your mattress notified you of his seat but the small hums of observation caused you to become flustered of your vulnerability.

"So, uh, Junhui?" You called out.

"You may address me as Jun." He interjected.

"Okay, Jun, how old are you? Are you immortal or what?" Your question seemed to earn a rich chuckle out of him. Alas, the first aid kit was underneath a pile of old comforters.

"I turned the age of 23 in 1845 yesterday," Jun replied as you found him clutching onto your Chococat pillow against his chest. "My internal compass was inherited naturally but...as I am the last of my thin dynasty with this power, my parents urged me to travel. Never to return home."

His voice sullied over with his chin and cheeks further plummeting into the side of your pillow. There had to be blood splotches by the time he would let go.

"So, you're bleeding from where exactly?" His eyes dropped at your words, his confidence retracting by degrees as he shyly withdrew the pillow, to reveal the deteriorating patch of some material around the side of his right thigh.

"Just here?" You sat on your knees, zeroing in on his wound, not even the situation.

"It possesses the most major blood loss. The rest is minor and axial." His statement cut short as he inhaled sharply, biting his lip to muffle his pain. Your peripheral vision caught his fingers wriggling and your kindness got the best of you.

"Do you want to hold my hand?" You asked, mentally slapping yourself. Murderer, do you want me to open the door and let you in? Sharpen your knife? You had practically said.

The way his calloused skin met yours in a tight grip sent waves of electricity throughout your system.

"Jesus..." your mouth went again as you now observed the state of his wound: deep, enflamed, near infection. "Alright, I'm going to clean it up, using some good stuff that you can buy at a drug store, which I bought from a drug store, and then wrap it up, only which I have done after putting some bacteria killing, healing gel."

You decided to talk him through everything that you were going to do, which was half rambling, half an attempt to distract him. His knees rose from the side of your bed as his legs were far too long.

"Drug store?" He questioned, watching your eyes instead of your hands.

"Yeah, we call it drug store since it's got pharmaceuticals. It also has stuffed animals and peanuts, so it's kind of strange." You commented, inching your gauze of hydrogen peroxide towards the wound, which caused him to flinch.

"I'm sorry. Just keep looking at me. Do you like um, peanuts?" Here you were being forced to converse with some dude that had just showed up in your place. He exhaled quietly at your question and movement. A few drops of the product met the surface and he continued breathing deeply.

"I love peanuts with my beef, in some specific meals." He replied slowly, lulling every syllable.

"I've never tried that," you answered. "Sounds yummy. Are you a dessert type of person or do you enjoy spicy or hearty meals?"

As you continued your process, you discovered that he loved spicy foods, used to eat them with his parents everyday, but now ate them intermittently throughout time. He never stayed any age of time permanently but he also spent weeks at most, settling himself down for at least to catch a breath.

"And you're done. There's still blood everywhere but those are just stains. Do you want some more gel or gauze for your face?" He blinked at your words, cracking a grin after a while.

"I could apply it myself, if it could relieve you of any more trouble that I have caused." He sugggested, arching a scarred eyebrow.

While he was working it on his face (after you had both equally returned all the misplaced furniture and products back into their rightful places), your record player finally turned on, blasting some Aretha Franklin.

"Excellent!" He cried out from the bathroom upon the first minute or so of the song and entered the living room where you stood.

"Good stuff, right? I always listened to her with my family. Especially when we would make the food together." Your murmured, settling upon the Hello Kitty bandaids across his face.

"Excuse me, um..." he paused, realizing he didn't know your name after what had to be an hour and a half. "It's Y/N." You assured.

"Yes, dear Y/N, what possible refreshments and nourishments do you have? I am bordering famished." Jun pouted excessively with some overarticulated hand motions.

"I've got some hot dogs, I know that for sure, and some ramen." You led him into the kitchen, reddening at the realization that you barely had anything.

"Hot dogs? I do not believe I have heard of them." He admitted naively, running a hand by the nape of his neck in embarrassment.

"Really? They're alright. I'll make you some so you can try them," you began your cooking, steaming a glance of his long figure. "Then, maybe you can kill me afterwards."

Junhui choked at your words before his quiet snickers burst into adorable cackling. The weenies crackled from the oil on your (other) skillet, breaking aroma throughout the atmosphere.

"I truly am not trying to kill you. Your stubborn belief sure is endearing. You are, pardon my frankness, too cute to kill." He continued smiling, as if his confession was a simple fact, and you mirrored his actions, reddening to Mars, as you melted into pudding internally.

"Oh, um," your mouth went dry and your hands went clammy as the chopstick in your hand hit the oil continuously instead of the meat. "Th-they're almost ready. You can sit down in the chair and not just on the table, unless you come from a time where people sit on tables to eat."

What are you saying? You scolded yourself, turning the stove off to move the food onto a farther plate.

"What are these things called again?" Junhui asked, knees hitting the roof of your table. He took a jab at the cooked hot dogs.

"Hot dogs. I can't tell you why or how, but that's what they're called." You both shared a laugh. His lips puckered constantly, pressing and parting repeatedly, perhaps in great, hidden hunger.

"Alright, so, you can put them in a bun, or bread, or something else, if you want, but I only have bread, so I'll make you the first one." Junhui nodded resolutely, licking his lips now.

"Do you have children?" He suddenly broke the silence, to which you gave him a confused glance, before returning to the food.

"No, no, I don't have kids. Why?" Your voice quieted again as you pushed some condiments for him forward.

It seemed that he had waited for you to meet his gaze because he offered that same billion-dollar, reassuring-beyond-belief grin. Beautiful.

"Your touch and efforts are motherly. You are very dear." If his caramel voice hadn't fully infatuated you, you were practically lost in him now. This had to be karma, for what, you weren't sure; you just never had good luck. Here you were, falling in love with perhaps someone a little short of an enigma (despite his great height): too good to be true.

"Thank you... thanks." Your blushing surely could not have been missed as he chuckled at your sudden inarticulation.

"You are adorable, as well." He added playfully, earning your scoff-chuckle.

"Anyway, are you ready for your hot dog, your highness?" You adopted an artifically royal accent, which softened his expression.

"How did you know I was a king once?" His voice decrescendoed with a bit of an untrusting tone. He sounded hurt.

"Oh, no, what, I didn't know that," you started stuttering. "I was just joking around. I'm sorry..."

The smoke emanating from the food dissipated slightly as did the conversation between you. What kind of time lord looked like a puppy who had been kicked around too much?

Junhui hesitated for a split second before simply elevating the food with his hands to stare at it inquisitively.

"How... how does one even consume this thing?" He looked appalled, his doe eyes shot wide with bewilderment, sending you in a fit of laughter.

"You could cut it or just simply do this." You displayed diligently, watching the awe light up his face. Jun nodded eagerly before mirroring your action.

"Mmm!" He hummed loudly, shaking his shoulders loosely like a child.

"This is absolutely delightful! I'll have another!" He thrust his hand forward to yank another fervently off the plate.

It filled you with glee to see him chew in such delight. His motions were so comical yet innocent. The certain Hello Kitty bandaid upon his cheek expanded with each munch.

Midnight had gone by, leaving you two sitting in silence at around two in the morning.

"What on Earth is that tiny, yellow thing?" He had asked as you washed the plates with your sponge.

"What's a hoodie?" He had questioned as he watched you look through your closet for something for him to wear.

You had introduced him to your phone, showing him how to take a selfie, which he mastered even though he had never seen an iPhone in his life. He played a game but had nearly tossed your phone out the window because of how often he was losing. Junhui had even looked through your books and photo books, sitting cross legged on the floor with your things spread out.

"I knew a man named Franz Kafka: strange, eccentric, but it was as if he could see the future, even though I had traveled decades before him. I never knew he would become a novelist." Jun confessed quietly, all the while you were fighting sleep on the bed.

The sun had to be coming up by now. You knew that you would have to get ready for work by a little after dawn to make it on time but the thought of returning to reality made you even more exhausted.

"Why have you not dozed off yet? Y/N, you look tired beyond belief." He noted, peering at you with observant, worried eyes. The sky was beginning to lighten from outside.

"You night murder me," you joked, leaning against the wall against your bed. "No, I just don't want to go to work. I know I should sleep but thinking about the few hours of sleep I'm going to get—"

"Then, come with me." Jun stated with the shut of your book. You blinked at him, watching the sky further change hues from behind his chestnut haired head.

"What? No way. I can't just...leave everything...can I?" He still smiled as ascended from his spot and joined you on your bed, thankfully remaining across the mattress from you.

"That's what everyone says," he whispered solemnly despite the chuckle. "You can. We could venture to yesteryear today, to tomorrow, to the day you were born, to the day Muhammad Ali won, to the middle of the Reformation era in Europe, any time, any where. My internal compass...has surges on energy. It mimics a second heart. You have helped me recover in the past few hours that would typically cause me to exhaust days at end. You have shown me the future in just the glimpse of your silhouette."

A beam of light between his pectorals seemed to glow, like the rising sun. There was no way someone like him existed, and surely there was no way time travel had existed, but here both enigmas were.

"I know it is not right of me to force you, but if you joined me and wanted to return, we would be back within the blink of an eye. Your destiny just seems aching for more, as do you." Jun nudged your foot with his elbow, stretching his thigh.

You pondered over it, knowing full well that the consequences of your actions today would effect you far more worse than the possibilities of being with Junhui, even if you knew little or nothing about him. You were a fool but something inside of you ached for something like him to come and spontaneously wreck your life in much better way than life had already screwed you over.

The sound of your alarm clock resounded as both you and Junhui ascended. He eyed you prospectively with a hopeful gleam in his eyes.

"With the first strike of sunlight, the energy will automatically launch me into the last century of today. The world depends on you now for an answer, Y/N. Are you willing to go with me? Are you —"

"Yeah. Yes. Yes."

He exhaled excitedly, looking down at you with a smile so big you had to roll your eyes.

"Well, it surely must have been my charm that persuaded you, huh?" He joked.

"Yeah, right. My choice was my own. So, anyway, how exactly is this going to happen?" Junhui watched the sky outside before returning his gaze to you. His shirt started illuminating from the inside out.

"I have never traveled before with anyone but as I have read in the ancient books, there should be little to no distance between us. You could simply embrace me, hold my hand, or if you have any other ideas..."

You would've laughed but his expression was dead serious.

"Don't try anything funny or it's over," you kicked some shoes on before shyly tiptoeing beside him. "I'm scared."

He gently tugged you against his side and wrapped his arm around you. His small waist greeted you warmly with his skin flush against your own.

"You’ll be alright, I promise," Junhui pressed you more into him as you both turned to face the impending sunrise. "Are you ready?"

Taking a deep breath, of all the things you had been through and all the impossibilities you were about to witness, you grinned up at his beautiful face.

"I'm ready." You said, finally venturing into the unknown, just as you were born to.

#junhui x reader #jun x reader #wen junhui #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #junhui fluff #junhui imagines

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lild3m0nnn-bpd · 2 years

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✨Day 5 of Working Through My DBT Workbook✨

General Skills: Orientation and Analyzing Behavior

General Handouts: Handout 5

✨Biosocial Theory✨

Emotional vulnerability is BIOLOGICAL: It's simply how some people are born.

They are more sensitive to emotional stimuli; they can detect subtle emotional information in the environment that others don't even notice.

They experience emotions much more often than others.

Their emotions seem to hit for no reason, or from out of the blue.

They have more intense emotions.

Their emotions hit like a ton of bricks.

And their emotions are long-lasting.

I feel like this is a HUGE one for people with BPD. I know for myself, feeling so in tune with not only my emotions but other peoples emotions, is something that can cause a lot of stress. With my partner, the second I feel like there is any kind of mood change, I immediately feel like I've done something wrong and my brain goes to the worst possible places. It's one of my biggest triggers. For me personally, the emotions being "long lasting" really depends on what emotion I'm feeling.

Impulsivity also has a BIOLOGICAL basis: Regulating action is harder for some that for others.

They find it very hard to restrain impulsive behaviors.

Often, without thinking, they do things that get them in trouble.

Sometimes their behavior seems to come out of nowhere.

They find if very hard to be effective.

Their moods can get in the way of organizing to achieve their goals.

They cannot control behaviors linked to their moods.

Ahhhhh the accuracy. I always found it hard to explain to people that sometimes I literally feel like I cannot control my own behaviors. This is especially bad for me when I'm extremely angry or depressed. I get so impulsive and it feels like I have absolutely no control over it. A lot of the impulsive decisions are what leaves me with very intense feelings of guilt and shame, at which point it becomes a horrible cycle that is very difficult to break. I get angry/depressed, lose control, feel guilty/shame, and then end up getting angry/depressed over it all over again. On one hand, it's nice to know that it is something that is truly out of my control, even though its my responsibility to learn to handle it and be better about it but on the other hand, it really sucks to think like "if I was just born different I wouldn't be like this".

An invalidating SOCIAL environment can make it very hard to regulate emotions.

An invalidating environment doesn't seem to understand your emotions.

It tells you your emotions are invalid, weird, wrong, or bad.

It often ignores your emotional reactions and does nothing to help you.

It may say things like "don't be such a baby", "quit blubbering", "quit being such a chicken and just solve the problem", or "normal people don't get flustered", etc.

People who invalidate are often doing the best they can.

They may not know how to validate or how important it is to validate, or they may be afraid that if they validate your emotions, you will get more emotional, not less.

They may be under high stress or time pressure, or they may have too few resources themselves.

There may be just a poor fit between you and your social environment: you may be a tulip in a rose garden.

Feeling invalidated is probably one of the worst feelings when it comes to any doctors visits or relationship, but I feel like it can be especially harmful in MH situations. I myself have been invalidated before and it really left me feeling much worse with imposter syndrome. It made me question literally everything about myself. You end up feeling so icky and crappy after and just wanting to crawl under a rock. I think the second part of this does give a little perspective though. I do know a lot of therapists and psychiatrists who are doing the best they can. They want to do so much more to help you but they literally do not have the resources. They can be overbooked with clients, they may not have enough support, it may be taking a toll on their own mental health. Over the last few years especially, there has been such a high rise in people seeking MH help, and there is literally not enough of a supply to appease the demand. There are not enough therapists for the amount of people seeking them, and that can be a hard thing to understand in the moment, when you need help. This is not to excuse some of the genuinely shitty therapists and psychs out there, because they are out there. But again, consider the fact they just may not be a good fit for you. It may not be an easy process, but it's better to keep searching for someone who is a good fit for you, rather than give up entirely.

An ineffective SOCIAL environment is a big problem when you want to learn to regulate emotions and actions.

Your environment may reinforce out of control emotions and behaviors.

If people give in when you get out of control, it will be hard for you to get in control.

If others command you to change, but don't coach you on how to do this, it will be hard to keep on trying to change.

I got so lucky with my partner when it comes to this. He is AMAZING. He so good at not giving in when I get out of control, but he isn't demanding or overbearing about it. He simply sits with me through my emotions and meltdowns. He talks me through things and he's extremely supportive. It's something that helps me feel very safe and understood. But, on the flip side, it makes me nervous when I go to stay with family or friends because I'm never sure if I have a safe environment incase I do end up having a meltdown. People have tried to command me before and it just makes me want to rebel. It is not a method that works for me.

It's the TRANSACTIONS that count between the person and the social environment.

Biology and the social environment influence the person.

The person reciprocates and influences his or her social environment.

The social environment reciprocates and influences the person.

And so on and on and on.

I think it's very important to understand just how hard it is to gain control of your emotions and behaviors, especially when you look at it like this. There are so many different factors and influences and when you try to change or even look at them all at once, it can feel so overwhelming. It's so important to know that changing your behaviors and responses takes so much time, and it really is one step at a time. You cannot change everything all at once. Get one thing under control, and then move onto the next. Do not overwhelm yourself with trying to do everything at once.

Source: DBT Skills and Training Handouts and Worksheet, Second Edition, by Marsha M. Linehan, pg. 14-15

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rosezure · 3 years

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Songbird 2 - New Beginnings

Songbird - Chapter 2

A/N: This chapter focuses more on certain BNHA characters, but there's still some Asa thrown in there.

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the BNHA/MHA universe, nor its characters. This work is intended for entertainment purposes only. My own characters are, however, of my creation.

Content warning: mentions of jumping from planes, talk about character deaths, !spoilers for the manga!, some AU stuff cause what is cannon if not a suggestion, tattoos, talk about physiotherapy and injuries, swearing/language. If I forget anything, please let me know so I can correct/add it!

Summary | Chapter 1

If Keigo knew anything, it was that he hated the Hero Commission more than he hated Endeavor. And that was saying something, considering his longtime idol was a child abuser. He hated that they made him into a monster. They took an innocent child and distorted his reality.

Keigo decidedly hated a lot of things.

But he couldn't hate Aizawa. Not after everything that's happened. Not ever, actually. The man was every bit the hero Keigo once thought Endeavor was. Yet, he couldn't help but feel like the teacher had ulterior motives. The two sat across from each other on a small wooden table in a secluded pub. It was just on the outskirts of Musutafu, which made it the perfect place for this kind of encounter.

"I want you to teach at the UA."

There it was. The ulterior motive the hero Hawks was trained to identify. Keigo cursed in his mind. He really didn't want to find a reason to be suspicious of Aizawa of all people.

The man had literally sacrificed an eye and a leg for others, for fuck's sake!

"Shota... I don't think I can. What could I possibly teach? I'm a monster... These kids need an actual role model. Not some bastard murderer with a hero title." Keigo's voice was small and quiet. He was miles from the great Hawks he was supposed to be.

"We've all done things we're not proud of, no matter how big or small. You did what you thought you had to do. In the heat of the moment, it was your only option." The older hero sighed.

Aizawa looked at the young man in front of him. He looked so broken and fragile. But he understood. Killing Twice, someone so vulnerable yet dangerous, weighed more than Keigo let on. The Winged Hero Hawks died then and there in Keigo's mind. And Aizawa knew it was taking a long time to heal from that loss.

"Look," Keigo looked up from the table, "Killing Twice-" He visibly flinched, but Aizawa pressed on, "That wasn't the best thing you could do. The man could've been helped. Maybe he could've become a great hero or teacher even."

Keigo was about ready to stand up and leave at that. He wasn't going to sit and listen to yet another person throw his wrongdoings in his face. He didn't need it. His mind was cruel enough.

"You're right in feeling like shit. But I'd be more worried if you weren't. You're still a hero, Keigo. You saved lives that day, even if you took a drastic measure. Even if your decision was a horrible one." Aizawa took a deep breath. "You know it was wrong. You know it was cruel. But you had good intentions-"

"Hell is full of good intentions, Aizawa." Keigo gritted, hitting a fist on the table and standing up.

Aizawa stood up as well. "Then teach those kids to not make that mistake. Teach them about good intentions and good actions combined."

With that, the older male went to the cashier to pay for their drinks. Neither of them had taken one stingy sip, but Shota still thought ordering drinks was the polite thing to do.

The two left together. Being grounded was new to Keigo. Sure he walked every once in a while, but he'd be flying to his penthouse by now. He'd be soaring through the skies. The thought of the wind blowing through his feathers made Keigo look up to the sky. He longed for the day his wings grew back, then he'd flee and never return.

"I know that look," Aizawa's voice snapped him back to reality.

"The day I have my wings back..." The blonde whispered, "I'm leaving and never coming back, Shota. I'll be free."

"Will you?"

"Will I what?"

"Will you actually be able to leave?"

Keigo stopped in his tracks, making Aizawa pause as well. Would he really be able to run away? Would he be able to just take flight and never look back? Keigo wondered if he'd have the guts to do that.

"I don't know," He admitted with a sigh before starting to walk again.

"But I'd sure love to have the chance to find out."

On the other side of the world, Asa was packing her bags. She had very little time to prepare, and she wondered why the Queen and Santos hadn't informed her of this mission weeks ago. From Asa gather through the reports and files she read, the confrontation between heroes and villains in Japan was months ago. So why was she only being sent now?

She'd have to go through the other files Santos gave her. Maybe then Asa would know what was really going on.

"Asa!" Caique's voice rang from behind her door. Asa smiled softly.

"Come in, punk!" She shot back.

"Can you believe it? I'm Commander! I went from Captain to Commander!" He looked like a puppy that's just been given a new toy.

"Oh, shut up!" Asa laughed at his happiness.

"So, my subordinate," Caique sauntered over to Asa, putting an arm on her shoulder, "My first order is that you let me kick your ass once." He grinned cheekily.

Asa rolled her eyes and pushed his arm off her. "No way in hell, babe. I've got a rep to keep, you know?" She winked over her shoulder as she walked to her closet to gather more items.

"Hey!" Caique pouted. Asa giggled at his face, shaking her head.

"Don't pout," She scolded playfully, "It makes you look five."

"Right, and you hate children," He added teasingly.

"I do not!" Asa shot back laughing, "It's them that hate little ol' me." She shrugged.

"That's not true," Caique huffed and took a seat on her king-sized bed. "By the way, I never really understood why I got the position and not one of the generals."

"Cause I've been preparing you for the position for three years now. I was gonna retire right before the summer festivities."

"Retire?! Girl, you're like 23! The fuck you mean retire?"

"I've been at this for almost 16 years, Caique. And I'm unhappy."

Her words silenced Caique. He knew very little about his Commander. Asa was strong, intelligent, agile, cunning, and charming (if she wanted to be). She was 23 years old, soon turning 24, and she was quite attractive. But that's all he knew about her.

"You never really told me how a 7-year-old became a soldier."

"And I don't think I can ever tell you. I can't remember it myself without having a breakdown!" Asa tried to play it off as a joke, but they both knew this was a sensitive topic.

"So, are you done packing?" Caique quickly changed the subject. It was her last day here, and he didn't want Asa to be tackled by ugly memories.

"Almost. Most of my things are already on the plane." Asa gave him a small smile. "I slept a total of zero hours last night. Santos was adamant that everything needed to be loaded onto the plane before sunrise. And I mean everything!"

"That man is wound up way too tight," Caique shivered. "Is there a way I don't have to deal with him directly?"

"Sorry, but that stick in the mud is your issue now." Asa bit her lip to stop herself from laughing at Caique's disdainful expression.

"Thanks, that's really encouraging," His sarcasm made her lose her composure and laugh, "What's the mission anyway?" He looked at her attentively.

"You know I can't tell you that..." Asa trailed off, unsure how to keep her promise to the Queen without shutting Caique out.

"Ah, you're right. If the Queen asked you to keep it a secret, then you must," Caique offered Asa a small smile.

Ever since they met six years ago, Caique and Asa were joined at the hip. Neither went into battle without the other. It was common knowledge among the guards and soldiers that one should never mess with either of them. Now they were being separated, and it already felt like they were miles apart.

A few more minutes pass as the two make jokes and chat. Asa began to think about how she could remember her last moments in Pindorama forever. She needed something to look at or touch every day. Asa never dealt well with homesickness. As Caique helped her fold some clothes, an idea hit her. She grabbed his hands, inspecting the many drawings inked into his skin.

"What's up? Why are you suddenly so interested in my tattoos?" Caique chuckled as he let Asa twist and twist and turn his arms around.

"Let's get a tattoo together."

"What?! Now?!"

"Yes, right now. Call the artist!"

Keigo couldn't believe this was happening. He took Aizawa's offer and applied to a position in the UA High School. However, he didn't think they'd actually accept him. And he was even more surprised to learn the Commission authorized it. Had everyone gone insane?

The world really did turn upside down...

But here he was: sitting in Nezu's office and listening to him drone on about the rules, the teaching plans, and other things Keigo wasn't paying attention to. Shit, he actually got in. Now what?

"If you have any questions, feel free to ask Aizawa. I've put him in charge of your training. Please be prepared to start in April next year." Nezu smiled at Keigo, standing up to shake the blonde's hand.

After that, Keigo left the headmaster's office in a daze. The last six months were hell: grieving the loss of fellow heroes, dealing with his demons, going back and forth from the hospital and his residence... Keigo couldn't remember a time in which he felt carefree and at ease. And now he's shaking whatever peace he still had.

"What have I gotten myself into?"

"Probably your greatest challenge yet." Aizawa lazily lifted the corners of his mouth as he limped towards Keigo.

"Oh, I don't doubt it..." He muttered to himself.

"Follow me. I'll give you a short tour, then we can head out for some coffee." Shota offered as he pointed his chin to the hall he came from.

"A tour would be nice, I guess..." Keigo shrugged his shoulders and followed the older man.

Aizawa could be surprisingly chatty, it seemed. He showed him as many classes as he could. He took Keigo to see the event arenas and other facilities. Last but not least, he took him to the teachers' room.

"We prepare our classes here," The hero explained, "Over there, we have the cabinets with students' tests and reports. Next to that, we have the teachers' lockers. You can keep some personal items in there."

Keigo walked over to the lockers, tracing the names of the heroes that taught at the UA. He recognized some of them. These lockers had belonged to some of the fallen heroes. Keigo's back ached with phantom pain. Seeing those names triggered the torturous memories from six months ago.

"They haven't had the heart to remove the names," Aizawa explained.

"They shouldn't." Keigo placed his fingers over Midnight's name tag, "She'd want us to remember her."

"Other teachers survived and will be returning."

"They won't be the same."

"No one's the same."

"Nothing's the same. Everything and everyone is different," Keigo sighed, "And different is bad."

"Different allows growth."

"So it seems." Keigo scoffed at his own words.

Was he even still capable of that? Growth was such a foreign concept for someone who was fabricated. Oh, the irony. He was built from scratch, molded to the Commission's wishes. He "grew" under their supervision. Would he have grown at all if they hadn't taken him in?

"How about that coffee?"

"I think I'll pass. I want to start working on the material I'm gonna present in class."

"I suggest a more hands-on approach. Depending on which class you're assigned to, theory won't get you anywhere. I speak from experience." Aizawa thought of the many setbacks a specific class had due to the students' tempers.

"Right. Still, I'd like to-"

"Form a strategy? Make a plan? You're not patrolling, and you're definitely not in an undercover mission. This is teaching," Aizawa paused, trying to think of the right words, "You need a base, but you're gonna have to improvise from time to time. And these are teenagers, not villains. The most they can do is piss you off." He smirked teasingly.

"Got it," Keigo answered simply, already flipping through a book on teaching methods he found lying about.

Aizawa rubbed his face, watching the ex-hero with something akin to pity. The boy had never been a real teenager. How was he supposed to deal with so many of them at once? He'd need a lot of support, that's for sure.

The two sat at the table near the pantry. Keigo was reading aloud some parts of the book he found, asking Aizawa for his input. Whenever the older hero gave a tip, Keigo immediately recorded it on his phone's note app. Halfway through the fourth chapter, Principal Nezu walked in.

"Aizawa, I just received great news from Tokyo!" His ears twitched in excitement.

"What news?" Aizawa raised an eyebrow.

"The Prime Minister has successfully contacted Pindorama. They're sending the hero we discussed last week. She'll be arriving next week!" Nezu informed with a smile.

"You mean the one with the practically extinct quirk?"

"Yes, exactly."

"I heard she was trouble."

"Oh, I doubt she'll be a burden to us."

"Sorry to interrupt," Keigo lifted his head from the book, now curious about the person they were talking about, "Who are you talking about?"

"Oh! Hawks!" Keigo stiffened at the use of his hero name, "I forgot to mention it to you earlier, but you won't be the only newbie. A special guest is coming from another country to help with things around here. She has a very rare quirk, which will greatly help us as a country bounce back from the events of March." Nezu beamed, folding his paws in front of his chest.

"What kind of quirk?" Keigo squinted his eyes.

"It's of a healing nature, but no one is sure of how it works," Aizawa explained, "There's not much written about this quirk. The only group of people that knew everything about it are all gone." He slumped in his seat, feeling sleepy already.

"So, there are no records on it? How can we trust this stranger?" Keigo frowned.

"That's a reasonable question," Nezu lifted himself onto one of the vacant chairs and looked at Keigo, "But there's no need to worry. She's a show of the alliance between the two countries. If anything goes wrong, it'll be a war declaration."

"That just makes her even more dangerous. I don't think we should let someone so-" Aizawa interrupted Keigo by clearing his throat.

"Rest assured, Keigo, that she won't be a problem to any of us," Nezu added. He smiled widely once more before hopping off the chair and bidding the two heroes goodbye.

A few minutes passed as Keigo continued to read the book and ask Aizawa questions. Meanwhile, the raven-haired man was fighting to stay awake and help the young man understand the methods and concepts. But he had drained himself during his physiotherapy session that morning. He needed a nap, or he'd pass out right there.

Sensing the older man's tiredness, Keigo decided to excuse himself. He told Aizawa he'd continue reading at home and that he'd take notes of any doubts that might surface. After packing his things, Keigo bid the teacher goodbye and left.

The next time the two men met, Keigo was at the school to look for more teaching supplies. They greeted each other at the gates with a quiet nod each. Aizawa seemed better, stronger, Keigo noted. Maybe his physiotherapy sessions had been paying off. Eri's contribution probably helped too.

Aizawa had once told him that Eri wanted to heal him and give him his wings back. But Keigo had refused. He didn't want them back, not like this. Hawks died, and if Keigo had any say in it, he'd stay dead. So, if his wings grew back, he wanted to earn them and start anew.

For days, he and Aizawa would sit together near the pantry in the teacher's room. Keigo would read excerpts from teaching books or bring teaching plans and ask for Aizawa's input. Day in and day out, the older man would reassure the blonde that the material was suitable. And day in and day out, Keigo would create different versions on the same plan. He swore they were only backups in case he forgot to prepare for a class or something. But Shota Aizawa knew very well that the young man was scared of messing up.

After what happened in March, Class 1-A was going to need a lot of support. So Aizawa often found himself praying to a whatever higher energy that they'd be okay. That every student and teacher would find solace in being a hero and saving lives. He prayed for everyone to find a way to cope.

These prayers always startled Shota. He wasn't religious at all! He never cared about gods or spirits or ancestors. But he sure as fuck hoped that something was watching over them and that things would be fixed. He knew better than anyone how naive thinking like this was. But he also knew it was better than wallowing in self-pity.

Yet, Aizawa felt like Keigo would be the one getting support from the students.

Aizawa just wished Keigo would accept any form of support.

"Ready when you are, Siren!" The pilot yelled over the radio system of the plane, "We are one minute away from the drop-off point!"

"Roger that, Captain!" Asa shot back, preparing her equipment and adjusting her suit.

Her first mission was to infiltrate the HPSC building and bug the president's office. If she had time, Asa was going to try and bug any other high-ranked offices too. She had to be precise and fast. One slipup and the whole mission could be compromised.

Once they reached the drop-off point, Asa removed her protective headset and put on her goggles. She waited for the crew to open the plane's doors while she made sure everything was ready. The plane's doors opened, and Asa saluted the soldiers behind her before throwing herself out of the plane.

Asa had missed the exhilaration of jumping into the night. She forgot how thrilling it was and how powerful she felt. The dropping point had been 14000 feet (around 4267 meters) high, so Asa had about a minute of free-falling before she could open her wings. Having done this many times before, Asa successfully landed on top of a building south of the HPSC headquarters.

She retracted her wings, thankful for her suit being backless, and prepared to jump onto the next building. They dropped her off a little away from the premises to not alert any busybodies.

Asa wasted no time getting to work. In just under 10 minutes, she had made it onto one of the windows on the 14th floor of the HPSC's building's south side. And in less than 20 minutes, Asa had located the president's office.

Asa managed to open one of the smaller windows and slithered in. She placed a bug on one of the far corners of the giant window behind the desk. She also placed another under the desk table and one behind a few books. Asa put the fourth and last bug under the clock that hung over the entrance door. After that, as quickly as she got in, Asa was out. She checked her watch. Asa had some time left before a helicopter picked her up at the designated rendezvous point. So, she decided to find the vice-president's office, or maybe a lab of some sort.

Flying around the building, Asa used her enhanced vision goggles to see if she could locate any useful information. On the west side, she found a lab with the words "authorized personnel only" printed on the door. Squinting, Asa flew closer and found a way in. Smirking at her findings, she bugged the lab as thoroughly as she could.

Once she was outside again, Asa dropped onto a nearby building and sprinted to the rendezvous point.

"This is Siren speaking," Asa's voice was barely above a whisper, "Heading to the pick-up point."

Asa dropped down from a building, disappearing into the night.

Chapter 3

#bnha #mha #hawks x oc #keigo takami x oc #hawks #keigo takami #bnha au #bnha oc #hawks fanfic #bnha fanfic #boku no hero academia #my hero academia

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neko-pupper · 3 years

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HEAVY DISCLAIMER READ BEFORE SCROLLING

My sincerest apologies to anyone who reads this intense, horrifying drabble. Trigger warnings are put in place for the darkest parts, so please if you are sensitive or are a victim of r--e and/or sexual abuse please please please skip over the parts with trigger warnings. This drabble hangs heavily on ongoing trauma and the effects of r--e. This long ass drabble also includes quite a bit of information on why Pip is the way that she is, how she copes with her trauma, and what she experiences because of it. This was a hard piece to write due to how close it hits home for me, as a victim myself. I left out the particularly scarring parts for a reason, and I will not elaborate on what all occurred for my own sanity and yours. But this was very important for me to write out and I'm relieved to finally get it all written down (and saved for future reference due to how long it took to write and the effort I put into it). Writing out things like this helps me to cope with my own trauma.

This is Pip's personal Hell. You all may interact with this drabble if you wish. Please be aware that Pip is going to be very...uncomfortable and possibly aggressive.

You have been warned and informed. Do with this information what you will.

Sleep. Pip had finally gotten some much needed rest after cleaning up from dinner. Yet for some reason, at the unpleasant hour of 3am, she found herself wide awake and staring up at the canopy that hung over her bed shielding her from the rest of her room. No nightmare nor dream had woke her, no sound could be heard from within our outside her room aside from the quiet ticking of her clock. What in Hell's name had woken her from her slumber?

She slowly sat up in her bed, comforter pooling in her lap as she crossed her legs and brought her hands up to rub her face only to find it damp with sweat and hot to the touch.

She froze, blinking as she pulled her hands away before pressing the backside of her hand to her forehead. There was no doubt about it. It was here early, something she found so revolting about herself since her second year in hell. The monthly cycle female hellhounds went through in lieu of a visit from Aunt Flow. That time of the month where her scent became near irresistible to others of her species, among a few other species of demon. Oh how she hated it. This godforsaken bullshit...this...

Heat.

She could feel it now. That unbearable feeling prickling across her skin, making her squirm in discomfort, fire seeming to flow through her very veins. Sweat dripped down her cheek and she groaned under her breath as she swung her legs off the bed and shoved aside the canopy curtain only to stumble her way to the connected bathroom to her room, grabbing a fresh towel from the cabinet as an afterthought. Her stomach churned as she slipped out of her nightgown which was near soaked and sticking to her already illfeeling skin and discarded it to the floor in the same motion as she turned the shower on full blast and adjusted it to a lukewarm almost cold temperature.

All she could do was crawl into the tub and sit her ass down, stretching out in the bottom as the cooling water doused her, easing the discomfort for a while. And so she just laid there.

After nearly an hour and a half of laying under the cold spray of water she finally sat up, her body no longer burning but still just generally uncomfortable. At least it was tolerable.

She reached over and shut the water off after a minute or two and carefully stood so she could step out of the bath onto the mat, reluctant to dry off in fear of her body warming back up but she couldn't just walk around soaking wet or lay in her bed in such a state so she buckled to the need. Once dry she wrapped her hair in the towel and snapped her fingers to dress herself in a pair of yoga shorts and a thin tank top in hopes that would keep her cooled off longer. She thought to herself a moment before letting out a low sigh, heading back to the bedroom then to the door and out into the hall. She needed to gather supplies to stash away in her room before she started denning so downstairs she went, as quiet as possible so not to wake anyone at such an early hour. She padded down the stairs, wincing at the odd steps that creaked underfoot until she reached the lobby and took a moment to relax herself now that she was hopefully out of earshot of the rooms.

She shuffled toward the supply closet where they stored the extra blankets for alcohol and game nights hosted in the lobby, scooping up several to place on the couch to grab in a few minutes. Then she disappeared into the kitchen, rummaging through the pantry for her snack groceries she'd bought the other night and stuffed them all into a grocery bag for ease of transfer and returned to the lobby.

As she reached the couch and went to pick up the blankets again so she could return to her room Pip found herself doubling over with a hand pressed to her lower stomach. She quickly dropped the bag of snacks on the couch and shuffled to the nearest empty cushion to sit down, both hands now on her stomach as she folded forward to ease the unsettling sensation. Her towel unraveled from her head and fell to the floor at her feet and her damp hair spilled down to hide her face and legs.

It seemed it was going to be one of THOSE heats. How unfortunate.

The odd, painless but unexpected cramping left her sitting on the couch for another good twenty minutes which at some point she realized she'd laid down on her side with her legs curled up and her arms down between her legs. It was the most comfortable, if a tad awkward, position. Once it appeared to subside she tried to get up but it returned with a fury and she let out a startled huff. Her body must be furious with her for ignoring this for so long. A mutiny! Damn it all!

She decided to just camp there on the couch for the rest of the early hours in hopes it would subside and ease up by sunrise, managing to snag her bag of goodies to place on the floor within reach.

---

Hours passed by with no sign in relief from her own personal hell. The wolf had already munched through a sleeve of shitty powdered doughnuts, two sleeves of toaster tarts, and a two liter of cream soda. She did her best to resist the awful cravings that had arose but it was becoming nauseating as she stared longingly toward the kitchen doorway.

"I should have prepared last week... This is horrendous." she muttered quietly to herself, the silence absolutely killing her. Her mind started to wander after that.

/I wish someone was here to keep me company./

/Or at least some music./

/Isn't there a radio down here?/

/I'd assume so given our resident radio host./

/Ah... He'd make nice company. Pleasant to talk to, perfect to pass the time./

/He even seems to have a lull to him. Like a faint static that eases the deafening silen-/

Her thoughts halted sharply and the drowsy little curl of her lips suddenly pursed into a thin line.

"What the hell am I thinking?" she hissed at herself, abruptly sitting up only to double over and lay back down as nausea rolled through her stomach.

/Stars... Screw this. At least if he was here, if SOMEONE was here, I could distract myself. Maybe even request some food that isn't absurdly sugary.../

She sighed and closed her eyes, trying to focus on the gentle tick-tock of the grandfather clock. It was so awfully boring though and time seemed to move even slower with her eyes closed so she opened them again even if only to stare at the dimmed lights above the bar. She studied the designs for a while, tracing the suit of cards pattern that decorated it with her mind. But even that lost her interest after a while and she was delving into her inner thoughts again. She tried to focus but a haze of red kept creeping at the edges of her mind she repeatedly had to shoo away with a shake of her head until finally she growled at herself in frustration.

"No. Stop thinking about him. You stupid, hormonal [unintelligible]. He isn't going to entertain you. I won't allow it."

She shuddered at the sudden unwanted memory that flooded her head like a rogue wave, the gentle red haze in her mind being shoved away by jagged neon lights and a sickening scheme of pink. Images flashed through her mind that had her bristling with sudden and vicious anxiety. Dread coiled in the pit of her stomach. She knew what these memories were. How could she forget? No one would be able to forget such disgusting and brutal violations of oneself. No matter how hard she wanted to forget it all, burn it away into ash.

In the silence and loneliness she let herself have a moment of vulnerability as her eyes glassed over and tears spilled across her cheeks. Every month she had to relive that horrible night.

!!! Trigger Warning !!!

Hands danced across her as she sat on a stool at the bar, neon pink and blue lights brightening the otherwise dim area away from the central stage. She was still new to hell, she didn't know who would be dancing on that stage nor did she care. She only cared about the deliciously fruity cocktails which she was indulging in. Possibly finding some other girls to hang out with, maybe snort a line or two or pop a tab. She planned to enjoy her night.

Pip wasn't too bothered when she felt a hand brush across her back, she thought someone had mistaken her for someone else, until long fingers wrapped over her shoulder and a low, purr of a voice muttered close to her ear.

"What's a delicious little thing like you doing in a place like this?"

The warm breath tickling her ear tufts set her on edge.

"Trying to enjoy my night out." she replied curtly, entirely uninterested in the obvious approach. Nor did she care for that voice or how close he was. It set her on edge. She was already on the verge of violence due to her heat leaving her generally uncomfortable but the alcohol did ease it dramatically.

"Mmm~ I'm sure I could make your night much more enjoyable~" the voice purred again. Still dangerously close.

"I'm. Not. Interested." she growled before her face was grabbed by a strong grip and turned to face the one and only Moth Pimp; Valentino. At the time she didn't know who he was.

"I like 'em feisty~ Keep playin' hard to get~"

She suddenly yanked away from his hands with a snarl, throwing her drink in his face as she stumbled off the bar stool and backed away from him. People were staring now and she straightened her stance before rushing toward the back door while Val was wiping his face of strawberry something. Second bad idea. He sneered and glared before grumbling something at a burly guy in a security shirt. They both vanished into the crowd of people forming around the stage in anticipation.

Pip found herself in the alley behind Club 666, huffing furiously at the AUDACITY. She paced the alley as she tried to calm down only to look up at some point and find the end of the alley blocked by a sizeable horse demon and another burly lizard one.

She tensed, noticing the security detail on their shirts before making a run for it the opposite direction only to hear the door open and feel hands grabbing her. Hair was pulled and her legs knocked out from under her, barely able to react before her face connected with the pavement. She cried out and snarled, trying so hard to get back to her feet to run but she felt a heavy foot press to her back as her arms were yanked behind her back and tied together with something that cut painfully into her wrists.

She was panicking. Were they going to kill her? Again? Was that even possible?

Oh, no...

She heard one of them sniff and felt the foot on her back bounce as the unknown assailant chuckled something. Her head was swimming from the fall she took and all she could make out was the words "heat" and "slut".

Cold, hard dread settled into the pit of her stomach as she realized something.

She heard another say something along the lines of "teaching some manners".

That all consuming fear dug its claws in her lungs and she struggled hard, opening her mouth to scream, but nothing could escape as a hand wrapped around her throat and squeezed. The next thing she knew she was very cold, exposed to the night air.

!!! Trigger Warning !!!

Pip snapped awake and let out a wail that carried through the hotel, thrashing hard enough that she fell off the couch with a thud. She scrambled to get up and took a defensive position but nothing came. Not the pain she remembered, no feeling of hands groping and claws cutting her skin up. Just ghosts of a memory leaving her feeling dirty and downright terrified.

She slowly lowered her arms and her eyes cleared to reveal the hotel lobby. She slowly lowered her guarding stance and slumped back onto the couch, heart thumping wildly in her chest as she stared up at the ceiling.

When had she fallen asleep? She didn't remember falling asleep. But now she was awake. It was just a little past sunrise she noticed as she peeked toward the window, silent tears rolling down her face as she tried to shake the nightmare. No more sleeping. Coffee. She needed coffee.

She stood up again, clutching her shirt as her anxiety refused to simmer down but the cramping having calmed though finally, and shuffled her way to the kitchen. Coffee was made with shaking hands and drank straight black. The bitterness distracted her as did the burn of how hot it was against her tongue and slowly her hands stopped shaking so much and she could finally think clearly again. She spent the rest of the hours in the kitchen, baking scones and cookies at the buttcrack of dawn just waiting, hoping for someone to wake up and keep her company.

#hazbin hotel #drabble #rp drabble #tw: r*pe #oc backstory #Sidian Storm - Pip

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readingsbylibramc · 4 years

Text

birth chart reading for @annaoop

hello! welcome to your reading. I’m gonna give you a quick overview of what I’m going to analyze about your natal chart. feel free to ask me anything if something isn’t clear, of course. you’ll find out your dominants’ influence on your persona, your physical appearance, impression on others and the way you approach the world; your ego, identity, the real you; your reactions, your desires, inner emotions; your way of expressing your feelings, your mind and ideas; your desires and approach to love; your energy tank, instincts and temperament; in-depth analysis of each house with their rulers and analysis of heavy aspects; love life + soulmates/karmic partners interpretation; your relationship with your friends; your family life; your approach to career and work in general + possible jobs suggestion; your style, fashion sense analysis; life purpose and past life description; basic transits’ analysis to describe your current mood and, last but not least, your secret skills, how to make the most out of your soul and manifest what you desire based on your birth chart.

🦋 chart shape, dominants

your chart is a seesaw shape. your life focuses on different ideals and interests, often constrasting between each other. from one side, this gives you the ability to be adaptable and find solutions easily. on the other hand, you may struggle with balance; for example, you might find yourself dedicating your life to your relationships, neglecting your ego or viceversa. you need to learn how to harmonize these energies.

your dominant planets are the moon, saturn and mercury. you're an intelligent and hard-working person with strong morals and beliefs. you're probably very witty, you like communicating and hearing about others' opinions, but you also enjoy your alone time. you're actually quite secretive, and you may also be quite emotional and moody.

your dominant sign is cancer. you seek emotional security in life. you need to feel grounded, you're most likely extremely cautious about the decisions you make. you're also very sensitive and compassionate of others, even though you could get slightly passive from time to time.

your dominant element is water. you're very intuitive and empathetic, you care a lot about others, and you may seem like a healer to people you know. in fact, you always try to help them if you can, almost in a therapeutic way. you're also very spiritual, and you're attracted to anything related to discovering your higher self and soul purpose.

🌍 ascendant in capricorn, 23° / 3rd decan ruled by saturn and mercury

the most intelligent and approachable capricorn decan. you're a vivacious person, yet your heavy capricorn influence may make you feel restricted to share your vitality with others. others' first impression of you is that you look like some sort of authority, someone who needs to be respected. even when you're joking, you still have this seriousness to your aura that is hard to go unnoticed. you care about your manners, and just your overall impression in general. you may take extra care of your clothes, your makeup, hair etc. you don't want to look disorganized, in fact you probably own an agenda or even just write your appointments somewhere. you have a cautious approach to the world, you're very responsible, especially when people you love are involved. you may have a resting bitch face, even though your jupiter and sun dominant probably help you mitigate this. generally speaking, you still have a serious look on your face that looks quite intimidating. you also look introverted, and you most probably are. you're very modest, and that's because you're secretly kind of insecure about your appearance. you always feel like you're not enough, and that you constantly have to improve yourself to be accepted. this gets better with time, though. physically, you're probably very beautiful and don't realize it! especially with your scorpio midheaven. you may have an amazing bone structure, with high cheekbones, a defined jawline and naturally straight, pleasant teeth. you may probably also have an amazing posture and walk, even though you may suffer from scoliosis or other bones diseases in your early years. also, since you have a cancer sun, you may have more rounded features than other capricorns, like a round face, plump lips, big eyes, etc. you may also tend to bloat a bit.

capricorn ascendant opposite capricorn mercury: you appear as a very intelligent individual, and people may even feel intimidated by that. you love interacting with others; even if you're not much talkative, you like hearing about others' theories and opinions. you could also do that by reading blogs, books etc. you may sometimes find yourself in conflict with others, as you’re very opinionated and hate it when others’ opinions are baseless. pretty much, you could seem like a know-it-all. on the other hand, you have a nice sense of humor, you're able to light up the room with your words, even though this quality of yours may be overshadowed by introversion at first. yet, since your mercury is in cancer, I feel like this may manifest more as a passive-aggressive behaviour for you. you may often pretend to be innocent just to avoid conflicts, especially since your mercury is conjunct your venus.

🌞 sun in cancer, 7° / 1st decan ruled by the moon

this is the softest, most affectionate and emotional cancer decan. even though you may not show it due to your capricorn rising's influence, you’re actually very vulnerable and sensitive. you may be a crybaby, as crying is a way to vent your emotions. you may even overreact, and be considered too dramatic. you’re extremely moody; you could be all happy and relaxed with your friends, then suddenly you get sad, or even angry. it’s hard to deal with this, especially because your emotions are quite intense. this could make you argue a lot with your peers. even though it takes you a while to find someone willing to stay, when that moment finally comes you’ll embody cancer’s best trait: that is, you’ll become a ‘mother’ to your friends, lover etc. you have a very nurturing soul, you have a knack for affection and care, and you could even get kind of clingy, even though you may feel limitated to give your love to someone else. cancer is a cardinal sign, hence you may be the one to take initiative, yet you do it undirectly. you’re probably the passive-aggressive type, especially since you have a whole stellium in cancer. you’re most likely also quite patient, even though you don’t forgive easily. once someone tries to take advantage of you, it’s over for them.

cancer sun conjunct cancer venus: you enjoy peace and harmony. you want your surroundings to look all neat and clean, and the same goes for the people you surround yourself with. you wish people saw you as easy to approach, even though you may sometimes struggle with your image. you try to be as formal and kind as possible with people you don’t know well, unless they start getting on your nerves by disagreeing with your opinions or being too bossy. you’re very feminine, not only in your looks and manners but also in the way you dress. you’re quite romantic too, and dream of having a perfect marriage. the downside to this aspect is that because you take so much care of yourself, people may mistake your self-love for vanity. also, your self-esteem may depend too much on others’ opinion of you; you may start thinking you’re ugly and unworthy of love just because someone told you you’re not their type, to sum up.

cancer sun conjunct cancer mars: with this placement, you may be more straight-forward than the typical cancer. you are very impulsive and honest above all, you say things as they are. you don't get hurt easily, you're able to be very brave when you want to, and even if you do get emotionally hurt, you know how to stand up for yourself again. you strive to achieve your goals and make your dreams come true, you're an hard-worker. some may call you impatient, and you may actually be, but in reality you just can't wait for things to happen. for example, let's suppose you're going to the mall to buy the playstation you always wanted. you'd start only thinking and talking about that playstation until you actually get it in your hands. you get easily excited. also, this is another placement that indicates that it's hard not to notice you. you have a very strong charisma that makes others stare. you strive to be the number #1 at whatever you do, you're a serious competitor and you'd do anything to win and achieve your goals.

🌙 moon in gemini, 0° / 1st decan ruled by mercury

the most intelligent gemini decan. you're very curious about the world, you always want to be informed about the latest news and everything that surrounds you in general. this could make you love gossip and journalism, for example. in fact, you're quite chatty, you love talking to others, and you're likely to have a good sense of humor as well. you live to fill up your mind with knowledge, and you love sharing what you learn with others. in some cases, you may even come off as a bit of a know-it-all. you're really practical and logical, even though you don't lack intuition either thanks to your heavy cancer dominance; this is good, as it's obviously a heavy mental work that makes you even smarter, and as a result you don't have the tendency to over-analyze your emotions. you're also quite moody, and you go from being full of energy and sociable to isolating yourself. I also assume that you may hide your feelings, even if you don't do it consciously. e.g, you may make jokes about them. even though you don't realize it, it's a sort of self-sabotaging mechanism, as you're literally exposing your weak points to the world and enhancing your flaws. aside from that, I still think that people perceive you as very likeable, especially when you feel comfortable in the environment you are in. you're naturally flirty and charming, and people take note of that.

gemini moon conjunct taurus jupiter: this placement makes you extremely likeable and benevolent. you're very open-minded, you hardly ever judge someone, you give off very positive vibes. you may be quite optimistic, or at least more optimistic than the typical cancer, you like looking for solution and at the bright side of things. you're probably quite lucky, you always manage to avoid bad situations somehow, even though this placement could be altered by the fact that your moon and jupiter also conjunct your saturn; perhaps, you may come from a more unpleasant background, you could lack confidence and hence you may not assert yourself when taking new challenges. yet, as time goes by and you become more mature, you understand how to approach and overcome those challenges. as a result, you'll probably start seeing this luck of yours later in life, and it may manifest in your future family with your spouse and possible children.

gemini moon conjunct taurus saturn: you tend to hide your emotions under a severe, strict mask. the way you approach others is influenced by your sense of defensiveness, making you lack genuinity. this comes from a fear of intimacy and dealing with your inner, deeper self. it's like you're hiding from your own emotions, so of course you will never be able to express them properly if you're not aware of them. to learn saturn’s lessons, you need to overcome your trust issues and possible introversion. find someone you truly trust and feel comfortable with, and then open up to them; it’s only a small step, but once you become more comfortable with someone else, you’ll start feeling much better. this placement can also indicate that your home environment could have been strict or even violent at a certain point, it probably wasn't much peaceful, but thanks to your moon being also conjunct to jupiter, a benevolent planet, you probably know how to detach from possible unfortunate events. in fact, those hardships probably made you grow up in the much more mature and responsible person that you are today.

🗣 mercury in cancer, 18° / 2nd decan ruled by the moon and pluto

you don't really rely on logic. you're very emotionally intelligent, and you take in consideration others' feelings when you speak. even though you may be impulsive and blunt sometimes, you don't do it with malice at all. you may actually feel guilty after you realize that you've hurt someone. you may be sort of manipulative, as you're very observant of others' behaviours. because of that, you may be extremely good at interacting with others, since you know how to speak to people when you don't let your impulsiveness get over you. you know how to persuade others, even though you may not even realize it. if you manage to balance your moon and your mercury, I think it would give you great social skills. you'd be able to stand up for yourself, while also being mindful and conscious of the effect of your words on others. you may get defensive quite easily, and because of that you may become a bit secretive. that's because, deep down, you feel the need to be understood to fully convey and express your emotions. you want to feel at home with your interlocutor, otherwise you'll just be awkward. on the other hand, you have a nice sense of humor, you're able to light up the room with your jokes. your voice may be nasal, but pretty much very gentle as well.

cancer mercury conjunct cancer venus: this placement confirms your struggles to open yourself to the world. you’re insecure that your thoughts and ideas may be judged negatively by others, hence you just bottle them up with your feelings. this aspect is mostly positive, though! you’re probably a good singer, or at least you have a very calm tone of voice that is pleasant to hear. you’re able to see both sides of an argument, hence you may be good at helping people making up. you could actually be suited for psychology! you may also earn money through your voice and thoughts, so you could be a writer, a journalist, an actress, a singer etc. this placement assures that you may be sociable, or at least that you have great social skills.

❤️ venus in cancer, 12° / 2nd decan ruled by the moon and pluto

when it comes to love, you're extremely affectionate. you need someone who connects to you emotionally, it matters way more than physical attraction. in a partner you look at their manners, not at their appearance, and hence you're probably not the type to fall in love at first sight. you most likely dream of building a family with your future spouse, you want to be a parent not only to your child but also to your spouse. you like nurturing others, you may be attracted to younger or even immature people that need to be 'saved' by someone to become mature, or perhaps you're the one who craves to be nurtured in a relationship. you probably love being called 'baby', 'honey', 'sweetheart'... this type of names that you find extremely sweet. you may also get clingy at times, as you're most likely very fond of pda and skinship as well. the downside to this placement is that cancer brings sensitivity to whatever placement occupies. that means that you get extremely sensitive when it comes to love, and hence you may be the type to get extremely sad, even depressed, after a break-up, or perhaps you could start caring more about your partner's feelings than yours, becoming quite accommodating, so beware of that now that you know it. don't forget to keep your individuality safe.

cancer venus conjunct cancer mars: you are very serious when it comes to love. you seek intense, long-lasting relationships, filled with both romance and passion. ironically, you tend to attract people that are the opposite, who are way too serious and almost boring when it comes to love. that could afflict your self-worth significantly, as you feel unlucky in love. loving you is an adventure; you enjoy fun, exciting relationships. you're the type who's looking for a risktaker, even dangerous partner. you hate boredom, and this may be your weakness regarding this placement; that is, once the relationship starts getting more serious, you feel as if it's going down, when it's actually the opposite. hence, you just run towards a new adventure. yet, since your mars and venus are both in cancer, I assume you don't like changing partners too often, you still want someone that feels like family to you, but that also knows how to make you step out of your comfort zone.

☄️ mars in cancer, 8° / 1st decan ruled by the moon

in life, you have the need of feeling grounded and stable. you want to feel secure, and that makes you think deeply about your decisions, you don’t rush them. you’re not much impulsive, you think deeply about what to do and / or say, you are very cautious. this sense of being careful makes you quite indecisive, especially since you also have your sun, mercury and venus in the sign of cancer. you may change your mind often, or perhaps it takes you a lot to finally make a decision because you kept changing your mind. you tend to try and be collected whenever someone is getting on your nerves, but your feelings are extremely intense to totally bottle them up. you either get slightly passive-aggressive, and hence you could get very sarcastic and call them out indirectly, or perhaps you just lose your temper and face them angrily. possibly, you could even be the type to bottle up all of your feelings, until you explode all of a sudden. that can also make you more furious than normal, as you have all these repressed, strong feelings inside of you that were screaming to get out. you’re also extremely protective of your loved ones, especially of your family.

🏡 houses, interceptions

your 1st house is in capricorn. neptune and uranus are both here as well. with these three planets here, you seem less intimidating than the typical capricorn rising. in fact, you may look more on the dreamy, reserved side. uranus also makes you stand out from the crowd, you’re very charismatic in your own way. your body may be more elongated, you may be tall or at least you have a prominent vertical line. with your first house in capricorn, you care a lot about your status and about your goals. you always give the best of yourself, and you want to be acknowledged and praised for your achievements. it helps boosting your self-esteem, even though you may have the tendency to think that the compliments you receive aren’t honest. you are most likely a very maternal individual. you probably love your family, or just the idea of having a family in general; you could be the mom friend of your group, as you come off as someone very nurturing.

your 2nd house is in pisces. your relationship with money may not be totally stable; you may get distracted easily, and you could lose your money around. you could be quite messy, overall, or in general, this is usually a placement that indicates sudden money loss. this placement also confirms that your self-esteem isn’t stable either; you could be quite insecure, and you may idealize a lot the way you look. for example, you could think that you have an ugly nose when it’s actually the opposite. same goes for your belongings; you may think that you have saved loads of money, you spend them, and then you realize you didn’t really have much. the ruler of the 2nd house is in the 1st house: you could increase your self-esteem through spiritual outlets. for example, getting to know more about your soul purpose, or even about your birth chart, can literally boost your sense of worth. perhaps, you may start loving yourself more even through sex and intimacy in general. you could also make money from yoga, meditation and spiritual outlets, such as astrology, tarots, etc. you may also gain more confidence from material things, and hence you could start feeling better when you're able to earn and spend money, or perhaps when you buy new stuff for yourself. even dressing up or wearing clothes that you like would do.

your 3rd house is in aries. when you communicate, you take a lot of pride in your opinions. you hate admitting that you’re wrong, especially since you’re a perfectionist. you could be quite impulsive, and you may speak with a naturally loud tone of voice. you’re extremely good at coming up with plans easily, and you probably manage to stick to them thanks to your stellium in the 6th house. with the ruler of the 3rd house in the 6th house, you may make money out of communication. hence, you could be a teacher, a therapist, a psychologist… everything that involves the use of words in some way. this is a placement that indicates that your future career involves not only communication, but also healing someone in some way. you could become a writer or a musician, as art can heal people in an indirect way. or maybe, you would also do well as a counselor or as a nurse, as they’re more challenging jobs where you need to communicate in order to help someone out.

your 4th house is in taurus. your childhood wasn’t very turbulent, but not perfect either. your parents were most likely quite strict with you, possibly even violentat times, and your home environment wasn’t exactly perfect. someone in your family may also be absent, maybe physically or even emotionally. you probably were a very artistic and creative child, and since jupiter is also located in this house you probably got to make a lot of experiences in your early years. you could have travelled a lot for example, or in general you do have childhood stories to tell. the ruler of the 4th house, venus, is in the 6th house: you may end up following your parents’ same steps when it comes to school and / or work, or even health. you could inherit a disease from them, for example. you might have also been a very active and healthy kid, perhaps you used to eat a lot and didn’t gain weight, or you’ve always done sport in your life. you could also find a job in your birth country / city, or perhaps you won’t move farther than that, I don’t see you going abroad.

your 5th house is in gemini. you feel able to express yourself and your creativity through communication and media. probably, when you were a child you used to love puzzles. your hobbies are quite different from each other, and they have the goal to stimulate your mind in some way. in fact, with this gemini energy here, you’re probably interested in anything that involves communication. you may love reading or even writing yourself, and perhaps you could also be talented at acting or at least voice acting, you’re very expressive. you’re able to convey your thoughts clearly in your speech, and you may actually be good at mimicking others’ voices as well. you could also be a talented singer. also, since your 3rd house, which is gemini's natural house, represents career in your chart, I’d truly recommend you to turn a hobby of yours into a job. hence, if you’re into acting, you should try becoming an actress; if you like singing, you may become a singer, if you’re into writing, you should become a writer, and so on. it’d be the most pleasant and suitable job for you.

your 6th house is also in gemini. in your daily routine, especially at work, you have to communicate a lot. you come in contact with lots of people, or maybe you write stuff like blogs or books. generally, you have a very hectic schedule, as you have different hobbies and appointments that you can’t abandon. you also have a big stellium in this house involving your venus, mars, sun and mercury: this venus placement indicates that you may be prone to procrastinate, even though I don't really think it's exactly your case since mars is also placed in this house. in fact, you may actually overwork yourself, or in the best case you manage to balance these two energies and give proper space to both your hobbies and work. your ideal career has to include something that allows you to express your personal taste, ideas and interests. in this way, it won’t feel too heavy to you, and you’ll find pleasure in working. side note, but this placement also indicates that you may often date co-workers. with mercury and the sun placed in this house, you probably thrive from being efficient not just at work, but also in your daily routine; you probably like having a schedule, a routine of any kind (like a diet or a skincare routine for example). the ruler of the 5th house is in the 6th house: this placement confirms that you would do amazing at a career that involves creativity and pleasure. you could be a writer, a singer, an actress, a photographer… in general, anything that allows you to be creative using your words.

your 7th house is in cancer. in marriage, you’re looking for an affectionate and caring partner who’s willing to nurture you. you’re also the type to like younger people to nurture by yourself, even though your heavy cancer dominance points out that you’d rather be in a relationship where your partner is older and / or can be the one to take care of you. you can’t have the burden of controlling someone else, especially if you have yet to solve your identity issues or problems with your self-esteem. your future spouse most likely comes from your same city or at least from your country, you most likely share the same religion, culture, language, etc. they’ll literally feel like home to you, perhaps you’ll have a more serene family with them rather than with your parents. also, in a partner you value feelings above all. you probably don’t have a high sex drive, or at least you don’t care about physical affection as much as your feelings.

your 8th house is in virgo. you use a practical approach when it comes to intimacy, you may struggle to let go around others, especially with your pluto energy in the 11th house that gives you major trust issues. you’re extremely secretive, you hardly ever talk about yourself, and you may even despise being too exposed. you’d rather stay by yourself, in fact you have a very mysterious vibe to your aura. also, with virgo in the 8th house, you may feel so tied to a schedule, to a plan, that you lack flexibility. you probably hate chances, but at least you don't lack intuition thanks to your cancer stellium. even though you may struggle to get closer to your spiritual, higher self at first, you're extra good at handling situations here on the earth. for example, you may handle money very well if you're well-organized. transformation in your life happens when you're able to stimulate your logical mind to earn awareness of your problems. to make it simple, you may often not realize your mistakes yourself, others have to let you notice, but thanks to your gemini moon's energy in your chart you're able to solve your problems by your own.

your 9th house is in libra. your beliefs and life philosophies were shaped by the outside world. that doesn’t mean you’re basic; you just don’t look enough in yourself, you prefer taking inspiration from others. in fact, when you realize that you don’t feel attached to a certain topic or opinion, you just leave it behind and seek other truth. you're easy to influence, and the fact that you're so open-minded doesn't help either. you hate being told what to do, you want to be free in the decisions you make. the ruler of the 9th house is in the 6th house: you may pursue a career that involves travelling, foreign languages, culture, etc. perhaps you may have to travel a lot for work, or maybe you’ll actually move abroad to pursue your career. you could have to interact with people from all over the world, and your career will overall allow you to open your mind even more and make new experiences. you may also work as a writer, a philosopher, or even as a teacher or professor. you could also be a trainer of any kind, like a personal trainer for example.

your 10th house is in scorpio. you may have a reputation for looking mysterious, as you’re probably not very sociable. you’re extremely motivated to achieve your goals, even though you may feel lost and confused due to your hard aspects and interceptions. you’ll pursue a career that involves looking for the truth, hence you may be a detective, a scientist, a poet etc. your career will give you a major change in your life, and you’ll finally be able to embrace your self-esteem and indipendence thanks to it. overall, once you find your true vocation, you’ll have no problems working, especially if you decide to pursue a creative career that is the most indicated for you, even though it may take you a while to find the right job for you due to your midheaven being in scorpio. I feel like you may receive and earn a lot of money that mostly comes from other people, like customers or even fans, but you most likely won’t work under a boss, you’ll be independent. you may even open a shop by yourself, for example.

your 11th house is in sagittarius. your friends may be very open-minded, and you might have met them in school. they could also come from a different cultural background, or maybe they’re directly from abroad. at first, you struggled to make friends, as you were very secretive. with time, you’re learning to trust people and to transform and grow up through them. you’re particularly fond of your friendships as they play a big role in your growth and fortune. you could get popular easily, or at least you’re so benevolent of others that it’s easy for you to be likeable and get to know new people if you try, even if you’re an introvert. this placement also indicates that people may admire you, and you may even be seen as someone wise, a role model. in fact, it’s a perfect placement for a celebrity, as you may naturally attract fame and fans to you. yet, since pluto and chiron are also placed in this house, it may take you a while to come in touch with this side of you. in fact, you could be very secretive and picky when choosing your friends, you struggle to find people that you can really trust. you may have high standards, or you just don't attract people that you consider perfect for you. probably, chiron here indicates that one of your friends probably did something that hurt you and that you probably still remember, and hence it could affect the way you approach others.

lastly, your 12th house is in sagittarius again. you’re particularly interested in religion and higher beliefs, hence meditation would be effective for you. yet, you need to get enough sleep, or you could not be able to fully embrace the spirituality of this placement. you may also be able to have prophetic dreams, or at least they have a strong moral beyond them. also, with sagittarius in this house, you may find luck and relief in neptunian topics, such as meditation, dreams, astrology, religion, psychology etc. you may have a special bond with your pets, you’re extremely intuitive, you could even be able to predict the future, perhaps through day-dreams or even through your sleeping dreams. I’d definitely recommend you to get closer to your higher self in this lifetime, as it’s the key for you to find joy and pleasure. to do that, you may get into spiritual topics like astrology, tarots, psychology, meditation, yoga, religion… anything that allows you to detach from your everyday life is the key for your soul’s ease and peace. the ruler of the 12th house is in the 4th house; you may have a very spiritual, religious family, or perhaps your relatives were a part of your past lives, and hence they’re your soulmates. you may also dream of them often.

❤️ love life, soulmates

in love, you attract cancer, aquarius, taurus, gemini and virgo. your future spouse will most probably have taurus and aquarius placements, hence they’ll be very intelligent, imaginative and confident, but also very loyal and stubborn. they’ll be more of a homebody like you, and they'll probably prefer spending a date inside than out. you could actually meet them in your birth city, or perhaps they’re someone from your childhood or directly a past life. they could also be introduced to you through your family or friends. your children will be heavy in gemini/virgo placements, hence they’ll be very intelligent and talkative, maybe even too chatty. yet, they’ll be pretty ambitious, polite and serious individuals as well.

👶🏻 family life

your mother was very caring and affectionate with you, even though she could’ve been a bit too protective and/or strict, possibly even violent or overwhelming. she’s probably a taurus, a capricorn, a sagittarius, a pisces or a libra, or she has at least some placement in those signs or in the 2nd, 7th, 9th, 10th or 12th house. your father is more dominant than your mother, and he could be very scary. he’s very honest, and he may also be a bit possessive and controlling of you and the rest of your family in general. hence, he was the dominant figure in your house, but you may still have a nice relationship with him. he’s probably a scorpio or any other water sign. if you have siblings, they’re probably aries or scorpio. you might fight a lot for control, especially during childhood. you’re also quite possessive of your things, but overall you also have a deep bond. even though you may argue quite a bit, you still have affection for each other.

📊 career

you could do well at a variety of jobs to be honest! with your gemini in the 6th house you could actually work in different fields before sticking to one career, hence you’re pretty experienced. in your chart, I definitely see writer or poet potential, you have a lot of placements that point it out. you also have a stellium in your 6th house, which is associated to healing, fitness, health. hence, you could also become a therapist, a nurse, a doctor... literally anything in the med field. otherwise, you may also do well as a teacher, abroad as a translator or even in your natal country, as a journalist, as a singer... anything that has to do with communication, as well as creativity and healing of any kind. you may also do well as an actress.

👚 fashion sense, style analysis

your style is most likely very androgynous, you wear pieces of clothing that are literally suitable for everyone. you probably prefer wearing oversized fits rather than tight clothes, and you're also fond of sweatshirts, big cardigans or jackets, oversized t-shirts... anything that feels very comfortable, but that still has some feminine, classy energy to it. you may like softer, natural shades of colours like white, beige, black, etc. in your clothes, and you could also enjoy prints and graphics on them. you may also be attracted to vintage fashion.

👁 past life, life purpose

in your past life, the focus was on yourself. maybe, you had troubles with self-esteem and identity in general. you had to work hard and finally understand who you were to fulfill your past life purpose. hence, this lifetime your focus will be on the bonds you create with others. at first you might feel almost scared to the idea of marriage, or perhaps it's the opposite and you feel very attached to others; this lifetime you're here to develop this matter. with your north node in the 7th house, you're naturally lucky in love. there's nothing to be afraid of, you only need to take small steps and open your heart to someone, putting your worries and insecurities aside.

🤔 major transits analysis, october 5th

this year, your focus is on your persona. you might feel new, like you’re born again. you’ve probably gone through a few hardships last year that made you question your value, but now you’re back on track. this year, together with 2021, will be crucial for your self-esteem. even though you may feel pressured to always look at your best, you’re finally learning how to accept and love yourself. also, the north node is transiting your 5th house, and most importantly it’s opposite your pluto, so you may meet someone who can have a big impact in your life romantically! keep your eyes open, especially when you attend public spaces like cafes, libraries, parks, etc. I don’t see it being necessarily your future spouse, but they may be very helpful for your self-growth.

🧿 manifest what you want, secret skills

with your water dominance, you probably have a 6th sense. you’re able to manifest what you want if you subconsciously predict it, even though it may be hard. you’d have to get in touch with your higher self to do so, and hence I would suggest you to light up some candles and meditate for a bit before manifesting, in this way it will be way more effective. you may manifest something while daydreaming, for example. or perhaps, you can also try listening to your own affirmations while you sleep, as you won’t be consciously aware of that. it’s probably the most effective way.

this is the end! thank you again for booking a reading, hope it resonated with you :)

#astrology #birth chart #birth chart reading

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