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skeletoninthemelonland · 2 days

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Hi Starbs, sorry to hear about your situation, I am a bit younger than you and a couple of years ago I was put into a similar spot, even right now as I'm finishing up high-school my housing isn't very stable. I'll give you some tips if it's something that could help you. (I am from the USA so things are probably different over there) also apologies I am not good with English!!

SAVE. SAVE. SAVE. Budgeting and being frugal when it comes to money is extremely important!!

Do keep a bit of spending money as treats and keeping morality in check will do you good in the long run.

My storage unit costs me 66$ USD a month it's the size of a walk in closet. Whatever isn't essential or you can't carry in a backpack it's best you have a safe place to store it. Some will ask you to buy your own lock so keep that in mind.

Reach out to youth shelters! The one I'm staying at lets us stay 60 days but makes us leave at least 7 until we can come back. We can keep coming back as many times needed for us to find housing (as long as we don't have a record with causing problems at the shelter)

Learn your bus routes if you can, it saves more money than using a car.

Let trustworthy people know about your situation, friends, teachers, whoever, let them know as community and building a support system is essential.

Communicate with your college, perhaps they have dorms or programs that may be of assistance.

Eat!! Drink water!!! Take care of your hygiene!!!

Some gyms have showers so you can get a membership just to go shower if you need!

Cars can be very useful as you can sleep in them, there are camping spots rangers won't look through sometimes you could sleep at, 24 hour opened store parking lots, or in my case outside the gym you have a membership for that's open 24 hours!

Keep distance from your parents. I don't know your situation but from my experience, KEEP A DISTANCE AND HAVE FIRM BOUNDARIES!!! You don't owe them anything, not your location, who you're with, you're schedule, they don’t need to know that.

Apartments usually want you to make 2-3 times the rent. Example: rent is 600 a month? Then you need to make around 1200-1800 a month.

If you have a job communicate with your boss about your situation, they can be very flexible and understanding.

Don't burn bridges in the professional field!

Social networking is a life saver, if you make the right impressions with the right people it can come in clutch later on.

I'm repeating this again but building community and a support system is essential. Maybe a friend you get along well with also wants to move in, you could be roommates. Or an older woman who is fond of you learns about your situation and is willing the rent you a room in her home.

Pay attention to red flags!

Red flags in apartments can be how well maintain it is (mold underneath the sink) and how you’re landlord approaches it.

Red flags in people, like they could know you're desperate and will try to use that against you.

Do your laundry at friend's homes or in public laundromats.

Red flags in environments, maybe you end up in a bad part of town, get out ASAP!!

Share and update someone trustworthy often, you never know what could happen.

I wish I could offer you more but I'm currently still figuring out my situation as well. Stay safe!! Remember someone out there really loves you and wants you to be okay!! And you deserve to be okay!!

#about boundaries. that REALLY does change everything in the end #i heard many times that most of doing things as an adult is having good friends and contacts #this is very important and helpful!!#anyone that needs this just as much. i hope it helps!

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ohwaitimthewriter · 7 hours

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The Memory Keeper

Chapter 1 : List.

Pairing : Noa x human reader

Warning : A bit of mourning. Otherwise, all clear for this one!

Summarize (please I'm so bad at writing these!): A woman, allowed to live as long as the virus keeps running through her body, living on autopilot for 260 years, is going to see her life takes a new turn, finding hope in something that might come to put an end to her wandering.

Words : 3.3k

A/N : It has been a long time since I've written something and it feels pretty good to get back at it with this story! I hope you'll like it and do not hesitate to share your thoughts or like/reblog, it's always appreciated! As English isn't my native language, I'm sorry if you find mistakes or weird wording in there, let me know if you find some and I'll be glad to correct them!

Enjoy your reading 😊

It wasn't going to be a difficult day. The list was ready, the tasks the same as the day before and the day after. You had to go to the river: catch a fish, fill the flasks with fresh water, bathe… You had to get on your horse and on the way back, stop at the 16th tree on the right, get off, walk 30 steps and fill the bag with blackberries. You had to avoid the brambles and avoid tripping over the prominent root. Get back on the horse and ride home.

Prepare the fish: remove the head and tail, the skin, gut it and remove the bones, light a fire to cook it. Yes, evolution had done many things, but it must have missed the episode where it was necessary to improve the human digestive system. So the fish still had to be cooked.

The garden had to be tended. Over the years, it had evolved too. It had been a long time in the making. A vegetable garden, tomatoes, green beans and, you couldn't quite remember how, artichokes had found their place too. An apple tree was easy to grow. It took time, but it was easy. And then there was this little gem you'd stumbled upon one day: a rosebush. It was an important one. You had to take care of it too.

You always had to do something.

Your hands knew what to do and how to do it. Your legs took you where you needed to go, and at that particular moment, they had led you to your horse. You had to remove his saddle and bridle, check his hooves and remove any stones that might have got stuck on them. Run your hand over his belly to loosen the skin compressed by the girth. And don't forget to give him a drink. When it came to eating, he found everything on his own, except perhaps an apple, which you gave him from time to time to thank him for his help. He knew how to ask, too. In fact, he huffed and gave you a nudge.

Okay, an apple.

He followed you to the apple tree and you climbed onto his back. You could reach the branches, but it was always difficult to keep your balance. Especially when your right hip wasn't working properly. And you sighed. It really wasn't convenient.

You had to go on with the list, what was next?

“ Hearing my voice at least once and speaking so I don't forget.”

This was important. You had to remember how to speak. The world had forgotten, but you must not. You had no right to forget.

“Say something new.”

And you looked around.

“It's cloudy today.”

Which meant rain wasn't far off. Your horse was now grazing beside you.

“You should take shelter.”

You smile, you'd said one more sentence today. Your horse's ears twitched as if to say “I do what I want” and you shrugged. After all, he was the one to decide. But you didn't want to get wet in the rain. You patted his neck and went off to find shelter in your wooden hut.

You've lived here for a long time. A very long time. So long that you no longer needed a torch to light up the big room when night fell or when the clouds darkened the place. You knew exactly where the shaky table was, the armchair with its deformed, hollowed-out seat and even the little plastic pot you kept forgetting to put back on the table to avoid getting your feet caught in it. And despite the years, you never tripped over it.

You were right to come home. You'd just had time to put the water flasks and the cooked fish on the table when a torrent of water hit the floor. The end of the list would have to wait. The timing was perfect, as your stomach signaled that it was time to fill up, and the smell of the wood-fired fish made your mouth water.

Settling back in your armchair, you ate the fish, watching the rain fall against the hut's only window. Eating with your hands was no longer as disturbing as it had been at first. There were a lot of memories that had slipped away over time, but you almost smiled when you thought back to the embarrassment you'd felt the first time you'd had to eat like that. If you'd known back then where you'd end up…

A sigh.

Drops tumbled against the window and some seemed to challenge themselves to get to the bottom first. They were following the path traced by others before them, but obviously not all roads were good ones to take. Some raindrops went straight down, others tried to cut off their opponents' path, and still others weaved in and out to create their own path. Then a raindrop caught your eye. It seemed the most likely to win the mad race. It glided and slalomed proudly until it landed delicately on your windowsill, blending in with its sisters who had landed there before it.

You turned your eyes to the last piece of fish, which you brought to your mouth.

You took one last look out the window, and that's when you caught sight of it.

A shadow.

A shadow had just moved past your window. The rain kept on pounding against it and you could see the trees in the distance stirring in the wind, and you were sure you saw the shadow moving, quickly to the right, but the shadow was gone. There were only raindrops, only the wind, and you could even hear the dull roar of an incipient thunderstorm.

A deep breath. You had to.

Then a sigh.

The rain and wind must have played a trick on you. If the storm picked up, you definitely wouldn't be able to finish your outdoor to-do list. But that didn't matter, there was still plenty to do inside.

First you had to tidy up. Keeping the interior clean and tidy was important, so you couldn't leave the water bottles on the table. You grabbed them and stepped over the little plastic pot that stood between the table and what you could call a kitchen. At least, that's what you would have called this part of the hut back in the day, because there was only a broken sink and a cupboard without a door. You passed the front door and it rattled against the latch in the wind. You had managed to install a branch across the door, allowing you to keep it closed in bad weather. However, as it didn't close very well, the wind always managed to rattle it between the branch and the latch. But you got used to the noise. So you walked past the shaky door to put the water bottles in the cupboard, and when you heard a suspicious rustling sound, you jumped, staring at the door.

You frowned at the unusual sound. You had been holding your breath, but the wind suddenly whistled through the doorframe, which was sorely lacking in hermetic seals. So you breathed out, taking a calmer breath. The wind. Mother Nature was definitely testing your nerves tonight.

Well, you still had to change your clothes. Night was coming on and you couldn't possibly sleep in your day clothes. You stepped over the little plastic pot again and made your way to the wooden chest beside the fireplace to find a t-shirt and a pair of jogging shorts with a hole in the left knee. Maybe one day you'd find a stray piece of fabric while walking through the forest, so you could mend it. But you hadn't yet got to the list asking you to explore the surrounding area.

There were 7 lists divided into 4 sections, themselves arranged in 12 categories. It was your way of keeping track of time. You no longer counted the days, let alone the years; you'd long since lost the very notion of time. But to grow crops, harvest the fruits of the forest and simply follow nature's millimetric events and be able to anticipate them, you needed a reference point. The lists, though mostly identical, were that reference point. Hanging on the wall with pieces of wood you'd carved yourself, they determined your days and the things you had to do.

You didn't really know when or how you'd started making these lists. But judging by the ink, half washed away by the years - some of the lists had even gone back to being blank - it must have been a long time ago.

You put the current day's list back in its place. Tomorrow, you'd have to complete it while carrying out the next one. But there was one more thing you needed to do indoors before settling into your armchair for the night. One last important thing.

From the chest, you took out a picture frame. The corners were worn, the wood had crumbled and you had to handle it carefully to avoid getting splinters in your hands. You set the frame down on the floor by the fireplace, knelt in front of it and reached into the jar on your right to pick a rose petal, which you placed carefully in the right-hand corner of the frame.

You struggled to swallow.

That's where it always got complicated.

Once again, you reached into the jar and pulled out 7 petals. You always needed 7 petals. You placed 6 of them in a circle on the dry twigs in the fireplace and began humming a song whose words you'd long since forgotten. But you remembered the feeling. You felt a lump in your throat, and you often wondered how you managed to keep the song going.

You hummed, and on the last petal, with the help of a needle, you delicately traced his initials. You had to be careful not to press too hard, you shouldn't pierce the petal, just brush against it enough to see, if you concentrated hard enough, the outline of the letter you were drawing. You also had to blink a few times to see clearly what you were doing. It was important to get it right. Once you'd written the letter on the petal, you laid it at the center of the circle.

It was always at this moment that your hands shook. You needed a moment. Just a bit of time.

You had to wipe your hands over your eyes, the most important thing was to handle the two flints on the floor with care. Your hands had to be steady, not shaking. You interrupted the song to get your breathing under control.

Inhale.

Breathe out.

Grab the flints.

Inhale.

Exhale.

A sharp stroke.

The clatter of the stone threw sparks onto the pile of twigs and a flame sprang up. You started humming again as the fire slowly consumed the wood until it reached the petals of the circle.

A tear.

The fire continued to progress and you stared desperately at the petal in the center, quickly ridding yourself of the tears that were blurring your vision. The flame touched the edge of the petal and you watched the letter “C” burn away and disappear into the ashes.

The flame faded as the twigs gradually disappeared and, once gone, you slipped the petal on the frame back into its jar.

Now you had to put the frame away. Your fingers brushed the edge of the picture inside of it. Despite the years, you had managed, by some miracle, to keep the photograph almost undamaged. At least, sufficiently intact that you could still distinguish the shape of an ape in the center of the picture, despite the cracks.

He was a force of nature. You had taken this photo on a December day, you still knew because you could still discern the white flakes clinging to his dark fur. Back then, you loved taking pictures.

What did they call you again?

The memory keeper.

Even after all this time, it still made you smile. You gently squeezed the frame between your fingers, keeping it balanced on the knees you'd just tucked in towards you. This way, he was a little closer to you.

You made an extra effort to remember the day. He was standing high enough to see everyone around him. He must have been talking about something important; he always had that powerful, soul-piercing stare when he was saying something important. But he always looked…

“Grumpy.”

You concluded your thought in a whisper that knotted your throat. Grumpy. You almost expected to hear him growl, his ego bruised, every time you reminded him that he was sometimes a little too grumpy. “Grumpy because a lot on my shoulders,” he'd snap back at you. “No, grumpy because you're old” you'd always reply, your eyes always playful. And you were the only one who could say such a thing, with the only result being an amused snore coming from him.

And you felt yourself take a deep breath. Of all the pictures you'd taken, this was the last one you had left. You had to put the frame back in the chest, so your fingers tightened even more around the wood. Your head tilted slightly forward, closing your eyes as the wood touched your forehead.

Tonight was difficult.

You took another deep breath, and before the knot in your throat hurt too much, you straightened up and went to put the frame in the chest.

“Caesar, tonight is really difficult,” you whispered, watching the shadow of the lid close over the frame.

------------

It had been a restless night. When your eyes opened the next morning, they felt heavy and swollen, and you found yourself rubbing your eyes to try and make the heaviness go away.

Today, there was much to do. After changing from your night clothes to your day ones, you removed the branch blocking the door and let the sun shine in, warming your skin. The fresh early-morning air caressed your skin and you took a few seconds to smell the distinctive light scent that follows a thunderstorm.

No sooner had you taken a few steps forward than your feet bumped into something hard, causing you to lose your balance. In a fraction of a second, you found yourself on your butt on the ground, a stabbing pain in your right hip that had failed to move to stop you from falling.

“Ouch!” was the only thing that slipped out of your mouth.

You straightened up slightly, remaining seated in the grass, to see what had caused your fall and a pile of apples laid exactly under the wobbly small porch that covered your front door.

God, what a dummy not to have put that away last night. You thought to yourself, looking down at your hands full of dirt. You'd have to go to the river to clean it up, and now you'd just have to take your night clothes with you because you'd also have to wash the ones you were wearing-the mud from the storm must have dirtied your current clothes.

A pile of apples. You thought as you rubbed your hands together.

A pile of apples. You glanced at your right hip. Pfft, if you'd made Caesar break it to put it back in its place, you'd never have fallen today. In fact, you'd have avoided more than one fall.

All because of a misplaced pile of apples.

A pile of misplaced apples.

And like a light bulb switching on, your gaze suddenly fell on those apples that actually had nothing to do there. You hadn't gathered them the day before.

Then you heard it. A muffled purr came gently from behind you. Surely you should have turned around, stood up and dealt with it, but you'd found yourself rooted to the spot, eyes glued to those apples, waiting as an orangutan appeared in your field of vision.

And you refused to look at him, your hands balled into fists to keep them from shaking. You weren't afraid. No. But for some obscure reason, your brain had simply decided to freeze.

The orangutan once again let out a rumble, softer this time, and held out his hand to you.

“I'll help.”

His voice made you blink several times. You did your best to snap out of your stupor, but this time your eyes agreed to look at him, and the orangutan seemed delighted.

Just one more moment. It took another second, just one, to see your hand slip into his and before you knew it, you were back on your feet.

“Raka, we must go.”

The second voice surprised you a little. It sounded familiar and your eyes fell on a chimpanzee, a little further away, who had just finished saddling a horse. You frowned, your horse? You were trying to determine whether it was really yours, but the distance didn't allow you to be sure. There was only one way to find out.

So you whistled.

The horse shook its head and the chimpanzee didn't have time to grab the reins before your horse galloped off to meet you. They were going to take your horse… in exchange for a stack of apples?

You grabbed the reins and stroked the horse's neck as he snorted. He chewed the bit and blew heavily through his nostrils.

For a fraction of a second, you forgot about the two large apes who, from the sounds they were making, weren't particularly happy to have lost a chance of obtaining a second means of locomotion: in your peripheral vision, you could see another horse quietly grazing.

Your hands still knew what to do, and it didn't take you long to remove the bridle and bit from your horse's mouth.

“He doesn't like it.” you said simply.

And only silence answered you, so you showed the bridle to the two apes.

“The bit, he doesn't like it, he's not used to it.”

Your answer didn't seem to convince them. They stared at you, dumbstruck, and if you paid close enough attention, you could almost see their mouths hanging wide open. And that left you bewildered. What didn't they understand? You'd heard them talking, so that certainly wasn't the problem.

“You can't take my horse.” You went on, starting to remove the saddle.

It was becoming increasingly obvious that they were staring at you as if you'd just landed from the sky.

“If you want a horse, there's a wild herd to the south, past the river.” And you pointed in the right direction.

They remained silent as tombs, but the chimpanzee followed the direction you pointed with his eyes.

“Just be careful, the group's stallion isn't very friendly.” You thought it important to tell him.

Your gaze fell back on them and the orangutan, Raka, if you'd heard correctly, hadn't moved a muscle. The chimpanzee, on the other hand, was staring at you thoughtfully, as if he was trying to put together a puzzle with a missing piece. He then moved towards you inquisitively, perhaps, confused?

“Echo, speak?”

It was certainly the most surprising sentence you'd ever heard in your life.

#planet of the apes #kingdom of the planet of the apes #fanfiction #noa x human reader #noa x reader #pota #kotpota #oc/reader

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letsquestjess · 2 days

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Hiya! I was wondering if you could write a crosshair x gn!reader where the reader gets frequent nosebleeds and gets dizzy sometimes? (I’ll be going to an ENT soon to figure out what’s going on)

Hi there! Thank you for the request! 💜

I’m sorry you haven’t been well. I can relate to the dizziness, it’s an awful feeling, but I hope you’re doing better now 😊

Little Wobbles (Crosshair x GN!Reader)

Summary: After finding you during a dizzy spell, Crosshair does everything he can to help you.

Word count: 776

Warnings: Mentions of blood.

-- -- -- -- --

It only took a few seconds for the well-known wooziness to wash over you. Gripping the navigation panel tightly, you let out a groan, cool metal grounding you in a meagre sense of stability. It’ll pass, you told yourself encouragingly. Give it a minute.

The ship’s floor seemed to sway, mimicking the sensation of being propelled into hyperspace, yet you hadn’t moved since arriving on the charming planet, opting to prolong your stay to enjoy the captivating environment.

Your nails scraped the console as you fought to steady yourself, reminding yourself that the ship was stationary and so were you. It was a fleeting dizziness and it would subside.

This had been happening more frequently recently, a sure signifier of your decreasing stress levels. It was a common occurrence after stressful situations, that surge declaring its departure as it left your system. It was a momentary flare up, a wave crashing against the shore before shrinking into the serene ocean.

Breathing in and out, you centred your balance and allowed your body to adapt, regaining your full height. As you readied yourself to move again, you winced at the tickle in your nose as it transformed into the unmistakable wet trickle of a nosebleed. Your hands fumbled through your pockets, and it quickly dawned that you had forgotten to replace the empty pack you had used up a few days ago.

With a muttered curse, you turned towards the bunks, managing to keep the surprised squeak trapped in your throat as Crosshair’s intense stare bore into you. His toothpick landed in the bin with a satisfying plink, and he approached with a curious tilt.

“What happened?” he asked. “Have you been training with Wrecker again?”

“Just a nosebleed,” you sighed. Your effort to sniffle away the droplets of blood only prompted more to collect above your lip.

As another bout of vertigo took over you, Crosshair caught your elbows and guided you into one of the hazard seats. Crouching, he snatched a tissue from his belt and wordlessly got to work blotting the red beads. His eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

The dizziness faded, and you observed the nervous sheen in his eyes as they darted from your easing nosebleed to the rest of you.

“I’m fine,” you interjected, cutting off any opportunity for him to voice his worries. “It happens sometimes.”

“How long has this been going on for?” he questioned. He grabbed a water bottle from the side and dampened a fresh cloth to removed the stubborn splotches that refused to budge without some persuasion.

Although you wanted to assure him you were fine, he seemed so absorbed in his concern for you that you were hesitant to disturb him. “A while. It comes and goes, but there’s nothing to fret over. Little wobbles.”

Once he had discarded the bloodied cloth in the sink for washing later, he cradled your face, encouraging you to remain still while he inspected you with great care. Despite being cold, his fingertips provided relief from the heat of your dizzy spell. “The bleed has stopped, and I don’t see any more blood on you. We caught it before any got on your clothes,” he murmured, as though ticking off items on a mental checklist. “How are you feeling?”

“Still a bit off, but better than I was a few minutes ago.”

“I’ll handle your tasks today,” he said, dismissing your objections with a firm shake of his head. “Get some rest.”

“You don’t need to do that, Cross,” you replied. “Once I’m back on my feet, I’ll be okay.”

“If you keep arguing, I’ll tell Hunter.”

His mischievous threat lingered in the air, and you stared, daring him to follow through on his words. He lifted an eyebrow, rising to your assertion.

“You wouldn’t,” you said.

“Try me,” Crosshair challenged. Using his thighs as leverage, he straightened and extended his hands towards you. “Reckon you can get up?”

Accepting his help, you managed to stand. The dizziness diminished little by little as Crosshair directed you to the back of the ship and aided you onto the edge of the lowest bunk.

He disappeared for a moment, and you heard the distinct sounds of rummaging as metal tubs were shuffled and wrappers rustled. Upon his return, he set a cannister of cold water and a tray of snacks on the shelf next to the bed. “Rest,” he insisted.

“Thanks, Crosshair,” you said, picking a mini cookie from the top of the pile and popping it into your mouth.

“In this squad, we look after each other,” he replied, dimming the lights for your comfort. “Including those who get little wobbles.”

#fic ask #fic request #tbb #the bad batch #tbb fanfic #tbb crosshair #the bad batch fanfic #tbb crosshair x reader

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acheemient · 5 hours

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Things I think Will happen in Season 3 (it's not spoilers if it hasn't happened yet!):

Crowley takes up the roll of Duke of Hell.

Aziraphale was put into the role of Supreme Archangel so Metatron could keep an eye on him/get him out of the way/control him

God has been removed from the Book of Life or has been trapped or whatever by Metatron since the Not Apocalypse (hence no God narration in season 2)*

Crowley was a high ranking Archangel who Fell when he went to Metatron with questions. Crowley's memories have been erased (Duh)

Nina and Maggie will be back

Crowley dies in Aziraphale's arms, but Az is able to miracle him back from the dead (foreshadowed in season 2 by the whole "Lazuri" measuring system)

Crowley tells Aziraphale, "I forgive you," at some point**

Ineffable Husbands retire to a cottage in South Downs (because Neil loves us and will do right by us)

A Nightingale will sing outside the cottage and will be the last image we see.

Things I think Might happen in Season 3:

Crowley HATES being Duke of Hell, but he does it to spite Aziraphale

Aziraphale HATES being Supreme Archangle, but he pretends he's Fine. Lots of fake smiles

The Second Coming is a baby, and the Ineffable Husbands have to deal with keeping a baby safe from both sides

The Them come back to help save the day

Aziraphale brings Crowley back to life with a very tearful kiss **

Ineffables free God/bring Her back/add her back to the Book of Life somehow

God narrates the ending scene of the Ineffable Husbands living happily ever after, now that She has been freed/brought backby the Ineffables

The Ineffable Husbands end up raising baby Second Coming as their own in their cottage (throw back to them raising the fake Antichrist).

Thinks I Want to happen in Season 3:

So many kisses (I think we will get one, maybe two) between the Ineffable Husbands

A Big Hug between Aziraphale and Crowley (I'm taking about Embrace levels)

Crowley sarcastically bowing to Aziraphale and addressing him as "Supreme Archangel"

Adam still has some of his Infernal Powers. Nothing like before, but some left over

The return of Anathema, but I think her story is done, so this is less likely

A sex scene or an allusion to sex (but it won't happen, so don't worry - see below)

The last scene shows Aziraphale, Crowley, and the Second Coming in their garden outside the cottage in South Downs living as a happy little family.

Things I think we Won't see in Season 3:

Coffee Theory ***

Body Swap Theory ***

A sex scene or an allusion to sex between Aziraphale and Crowley (even though I want it, Neil won't bring it up one way or another. He'll let us all make our own choice on that one)

Newt. I just don't see him coming back

These are all just my opinions. Please do not get angry about anything listed above if you don't agree.

* God's Ineffable Plan was always for the Apocalypse to be stopped by Aziraphale and Crowley. Metatron still wants Earth to be destroyed. He wants his war.

**I'm hoping the "I forgive you" is heartfelt. Possibly when Aziraphale kisses Crowley back to life. Imagine Aziraphale holding dying/dead Crowley in his arms, saying, "Pease don't leave me, I need you, please don't go, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Crowley" (etc.). And then Aziraphale's eyes glow purple as his pulls up every bit of his power and presses his lips firmly to Crowley's lips (much like their first kiss), and we finally see Crowley lift a hand to Aziraphale's cheek to kiss back, and Aziraphale is SHOCKED and pulls away to look at a very weak smiling Crowley who quietly says, "I forgive you."

***I know some people really hang their hats on this one, and no insult to them, but I don't think Aziraphale needed any extra prodding or powers used to get him to go back to Heaven. It's enough that he thinks he's going to be able to make Heaven better and/or protect Crowley. I kind of feel like it cheapens Aziraphale's agency and the story.

#good omens #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #david tennant #michael sheen #good omens season 3 #season 3 predictions #long post

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circular-bircular · 3 days

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Now that I can finally sit down and take 10 minutes to write this post--

Earlier today, we finally dived into the littlescourse that's starting up again. I fucking despite littles discourse, but it's so important to talk about, especially since there are a lot of common misconceptions. So, I'm going to get my thoughts out under a cut.

Firstly, it's important to acknowledge that child parts and littles are not the same thing. Child parts are parts who are stuck in that trauma; stuck in that moment. They often split when you're that age yourself, and they still feel that age entirely.

We only loosely have a child part, and we don't indicate which of our 14 alters is that part.

Then we have littles. Little is a term used by the community to denote... a lot of things, honestly -- it has a fairly loose definition from what I've seen! The way I use it for my system is "Part that identifies as a child in spirit." That is because none of my parts are literally children; all of them can acknowledge we are 26, going on 27, and can accurately remember things. Only one part gets fuzzy on that, and that would be said child part.

Our littles are adults. Because I am an adult.

Now, to address some of what was said in the post from earlier (which I will not be linking, as I genuinely don't want to bother OP with this, but it's all things I feel need said):

something I HATE about syscords is that they have sections specifically for littles. they are CHILDREN. Why are you letting them have a place online?

I hate littles channels in syscords too, because often, my littles who curse, discuss severe trauma, and like to vent about adult matters are stuck with child parts. If your post is discussing child parts, then... I can understand some of your reservations, honestly! But I can also say, to each system their own -- maybe that system knows something I don't about how safe their child parts can be. I know I can let my child part talk in syscords without it being harmful for her, though we do keep a close eye.

I'm sorry, but caretakers in your system are there for your littles.

None of my caretakers look after my littles because our system only has three caretakers -- and two of them are our littles. We have Sie and LED, who are our emotional caretakers. The other caretaker is... Sie, but grown up -- Sierra. By your logic, my littles should be caretaking themselves! Which. They do.

Which, skipping around a bit, leads me to this point you made:

The fact that you let your littles participate in adult actions and they are "mature enough" when littles are there to heal your inner child that you LOST due to trauma makes me SO disturbed.

...

My littles aren't here to "heal the inner child that I lose due to trauma."

Straight up, that is not their job.

Sie's job is to help us understand that we can still have fun as an adult. She's there to remind us that childhood is how we define it, not how our parents did. She isn't there to 'heal our inner child' -- she's there to heal our inner adults.

LED's job is to regulate our emotions. We struggle with our distress, our fear, our shame. When it gets too much, he helps us to see the positive light in the world again. His job is also to process trauma and come to terms with what we've gone through in a healthy manner; learning how to grow up is his job.

And Gazi, her job is specifically related to Curtis's. Yknow. The sexual alter we have who we split to deal with our internalized homophobia and transphobia. Gazi, who is there to help him process his feelings. To help us all process our feelings, as we start to integrate more. She's newer, so it's hard for us to understand her role, but nowhere there do I feel "healing our inner child" fits.

Your system is not applicable to everyone. For instance, my system does not have an "inner child" who needs healed in that way, and even if we consider our one child part to need healing -- it wouldn't be their job!

Our mum (an adult, like you.) is a system and one of her littles isn't allowed to consent or have adult actions, you know why? BECAUSE THAT LITTLE IS A CHILD!!

Cool! My littles aren't like that. That was my point in my post.

Every system is different and I won't judge you for what you do. But the fact you openly say this shit on the internet as a GROWN ADULT makes me lose faith in the future for everyone.

This sounds a hell of a lot like judging me for what I do.

For most systems the littles chat is there for a reason and that's to protect them, especially if that system is a minor. Which in syscords, is mostly minors.

Never said they're inherently bad; I just said I wish more syscords allowed people to choose for themselves if their littles need to isolate in those channels.

As I MINOR (let me say it again.) MINOR with littles, for some systems I get why littles can't stay in main chat in syscords, it's for safety.

Cool! I genuinely don't know why people in syscourse are so insistent on reminding everyone that they're minors. It's okay to be a kid. I didn't describe anything graphic in my post. I simply mentioned "mature acts."

Obviously, as a 16 year old... You shouldn't be doing those mature acts! But I would hope that, by 16, you can understand that... adults... do mature things sometimes? And can find positivity, joy, and yes, healing through those mature things. I had hope that you were mature enough, yourself, to be able to acknowledge that adults do things you don't do.

Your system will be different you're an ADULT. but us, we're a MINOR, there's still things that we don't even understand and we're still going through my own traumas. You're able to recognise basic things without being disturbed and out right saying your littles can do outrageous shit like this.

You being a minor once again does not negate the ability to understand "Huh, maybe that person's experiences will be okay once I'm older."

I can recognize you're a minor and going through your own traumas. I never once said you need to let your littles completely loose to do whatever they want -- in fact, I strongly advise against it, especially if you're still in an active trauma situation. But. Minors can recognize basic things "without being disturbed" as well. That's not something I gained from being an adult. I knew how to do that at age 15 at least.

The reason the post even exists is to state our opinion and talk into the void about issues that either we have or others do. Not for you to compare your system to everyone else's. Respectfully.

I will be honest, I don't feel very respected, with my actions which have been incredibly healing for my parts being called outrageous, disturbing, and something to lose faith over. I'm really sorry that your post -- publicly put into the DID tags with the word "thoughts?" at the end of the post -- wasn't looking for other system input. I'm also really sorry that you're going to get a LOT more people explaining their thoughts on this, when it seems like the conversation is unwanted.

The fact is, your experiences are not just not universal -- they are also fairly uncommon. Many, many, many systems have found healing through letting their littles grow up and be mature. Whatever that may look like for them.

And then this last bit...

(I'm not pressed about this, but the way you've replied makes me feel physically ill from someone who has been taken advantage of not only as a child, but also has had to see our littles go out of their way to not be around a caretaker because they wanna talk to people and then hurt, harassed and exposed to disgusting content online because people are CREEPS. For our system, we CANNOT let littles into online spaces. Especially around strangers. Our littles have the mindset of a 16 year old. so, oh so sorry to stay it's different for minors.)

You've made a lot of bold assumptions here, entirely based on your own experiences once again.

I am a system who was taken advantage of as a child. I've also had my littles -- back when they were more akin to child parts -- go out of their way to not be around a caretaker. I've had my littles get hurt in the past, exposed to disgusting content, and participate in acts they could not, at the time, consent to. We were severely hurt by these actions.

I also changed. They changed. And we grew.

There is hope for the future, you know that, right? Again, I know you're 16, but I really hope you know that there will come a time when those child parts of you may grow up, or become part of you in their own right. There may come a time in your future when you will need to navigate romance and intimacy and "mature things" in regards to your littles. I don't say this to scare you, but to help you understand that there can be growth and change.

You don't need to make that leap right now -- again, please fucking don't, you are a LITERAL MINOR -- but understand that healing can come in many ways.

I compared my system in your post to help you understand the perspective of others who might be healing in ways other than yours, or even just the perspective of others who aren't like you at all. Not to say all systems have to be like mine, or that you HAVE to let your littles do things like what mine do. I'm not sure how many times I could've added, "This definitely isn’t the case for every system" like I did in the post, but... Yeah. Apparently I didn't make that clear enough.

Things are different for minors, yet. Thankfully, you've only got two more years left before maybe, just maybe, it might be time to start thinking about what your life may be like as an adult, and what healing may come in your future one day.

#syscourse #keeping up with nerd shit

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dootznbootz · 2 days

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Literally just found out about you today and I'm already follow in you. As fellow tele-GONE-y hater, I absolutely stan with all the hate we have for that stupid fan fiction. Circe used to be one of my favorite books, I still think the writing is good. But when you look at the original source material? Yikes- I don't get why Miller chose CIRCE out of everyone. If she wanted to write a feministic story that's fine. But why chose a female character whom you have to make better and corrupt all the other characters in the source material so that Circe is more sympathetic? Why couldn't she write a TRUE feministic story about some other character?? I personally would've loved a story about Nausikaa. Which would make more sense considering she is a character who is often forgotten in most retellings of the Odyssey.

Circe isn't a sympathetic character, she was never supposed to be one. To make her sympathetic is to make everyone around her terrible. I'm so angry when people use this book for insight on Circe character because it is so different to actual Circe.

I'm also so very salty about what she did to my boy Hermes because what.

Thank you so much!!! Sorry this took a while to answer! Thankfully most folks are not a fan of the Tele-GONE-y either :'D it's mostly the "well, actually" folks who talk about it. >:(

"If she wanted to write a feministic story that's fine. But why choose a female character whom you have to make better and corrupt all the other characters in the source material so that Circe is more sympathetic?"

This right here, is exactly how I feel with so many of these "feminist retellings". Feminism is about lifting each other up. If you have to make everybody else "worse" to make your main character better, then...that's just not good storytelling.

This goes along with the whole "all men are bad no matter what" that happens all the time and I hate it so much. Even if the system may be sexist, that does not mean that every single male agrees with it.

You put everything into words well but I like to ramble so Ima say shit too but it's basically the same thing lol

With the whole "every horrible thing Circe has done is done fo a reason. she's defending herself, she was wronged, men are so evil uwu" is just fucking lazy and SUCKS. >:( LET WOMEN BE FLAWED, COWARDS!

I actually really love Odyssey Circe as a character. She's morally gray and does whatever she wants as a goddess. Yes, she terrifies Odysseus but she's COMPLEX. Why does she need a reason to turn men into pigs? Why can't she just do it "for funsies"?

I think it takes away from her as a goddess to always have a reason for her to do the things she does, you know? Immortals are fickle and don't have the same morals as mortals. I think Miller changed so much as "to have a morally gray protagonist?? No, that's wrong!" which BORING!!!!!!!

I fucking love Penelope. But I still have her a lil mean and even a bit snooty sometimes as her and Odysseus are like-minded. Hubris would be her downfall as well. She is petty and holds grudges like no other. because she's a PERSON. Not "bland empowerment in a can for everyone to consume". Ofc, she has her wonderful qualities like her intelligence, devotion, determination, and yes, she does have her kind moments (she goes 0 to 100% real quick. She takes the "Do no harm, Take no shit" phrase to the extremes. lol)

But honestly? I think there's a real problem in writing in many YA books and especially in fandom where people treat female characters as goddesses (which yes, understandable) but then they can't...make her human you know? Almost like they cannot see any of the woman's flaws or even WANT her to have flaws because "woman doing a bad thing that isn't done 'cutely' ("endearingly clumsy", "quirky chatterbox", etc. traits that are usually not the greatest are "cute" now simply because she's a woman. Maybe a love interest sees her that way but those traits would probably be considered annoying to many others.) regardless is antifeminist"

And even then, so many things that I want to write about are what many would consider feminist when...She's just existing. And I'm getting silly with it. Penelope is athletic and a naiad (75% but you know. with her parentage) but I don't write her that way TO make it feminist. I'm not doing it for that. I just like tiny but mighty wife ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I don't plan to write other women as "lesser" for not being athletic for example. Anticlea doesn't understand why Penelope likes doing that stuff but she's still supportive and they enjoy weaving together. I am NEVER putting down another female character for not being "girlboss" enough.

I really hate that this book has made people constantly bring up the Tele-GONE-y AND Shittalking all of them. I don't like looking at retellings and seeing "a new feminist take". Usually goes against the entire story to begin with. Often portraying good male characters in the original as "bad and horrible".

Also no hate to those that enjoy Circe the Book, but to me, it sounds like trauma porn. adding rapes that were never there, making the victim of the situation the PERPATRATOR because, clearly, a man cannot be a victim. I heard about her hating being a mom despite her literally having servants and she's a GODDESS in the Odyssey. She could literally have a nanny/nurse if she wanted.

Fun fact: I was watching a video essay about villainesses and how to write them well and as soon as it started to talk about historical villainesses and how Circe was a "femme fatale", I exited the video. She's an "antagonist", she lets them stay there but she's still...Not GOOD. To be a femme fatale means to usually seduce. She does not seduce Odysseus. He was literally commanded to by Hermes and her.

#Hope you don't mind that I'm all over the place :P this is just how I am honestly #ask #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #tamaruaart #save me morally gray circe #anti madeline miller #anti circe #<-I like her in the odyssey. She's a good antagonist.

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