#Teen!Bruce: Fuck reporters

[manufactured-pleasantry]

HC that Bruce used to tell the media the wildest things when he was a teenager just to see if they'll believe him. 8/10 times they do and publish it.

Reporter: What did you do for your birthday, Bruce?

15YO Bruce: I got kidnapped but I told the kidnapper it was my birthday so he just wished me happy birthday and let me go. It was pretty cool. We got ice cream after

(There was no kidnapper. He stayed inside all day and read the new book Alfred got him for his birthday.)

____

16YO Bruce: Someone just asked me to donate to save the flamingos. They think I'm stupid or something. Everyone knows flamingos aren't real

Reporter: Um, flamingos are real

16YO Bruce: No they're not. They're just lawn decorators you put in front of ugly houses to make them look more interesting

(The charity in question got a lot of publicity from this so Bruce considered it a win.)

#bruce wayne #batman #brucie wayne #bruce the troll #Teen!Bruce: Fuck reporters #Teen!Clark choosing his future career: Please

[starry-bi-sky]

i think i'm hilarious -- aka i made blood blossom danny au memes

all of these come from my DpxDC prompt "i am pushing the batdad agenda--" and it's corresponding additions in the reblogs ksdjlf.

i am. rotating them in my head. forever and always. personally i think there should be more batdad aus in dpxdc, their dynamic could be neat. :)

#THAT FIRST ONE TOOK ME A HOT MINUTE TO MAKE. i have never been more careful with a trackpad. imgflip doesnt have an undo button #i think its fucking hilarious #its a batdad au #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dpxdc #dpxdc crossover #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc #dc x dp #mmm i need to come up with a name for this au #found family ftw WHOOOO. i could just do a generic 'blood blossom au' tag but i want a specific one because i like being unique #eldest batkid danny au #chronically ill danny au #danny: im grateful he's helping me but im still kinda apprehensive... #battinson: vaults over a car to escape reporters. likes rock music. isn't fucking evil. punched a cop. actively looking for a cure #danny: ...huh. okay. #furiously pushing the batdad agenda for my own gain. just look at them guys. they're funny little guys. #unofficial witness protection to adoption pipeline. #bruce wayne accidental teen acquisition. save a teenager gain a son #its about the adventure of them going from strangers to friends to family :) #im bored of the bruce slander guys in the words of hermes from hadestown: #“[its] about someone who *tries”* #danny saw a funny man in a funny costume eat the side of a dumpster and has never related more with someone on a spiritual level #“brother eugh i feel that. oh heY WAIT HERO BUDDY?? SAME HAT??? SAME HAT?” #danny's been the only hero he's known since he was 13. on god he is leaping at this opportunity. like YES. PLEASE BE ANOTHER HERO #HELP ME GET AWAY FROM CERTIFIED CRAZY MAN. HELP. YOU'RE SCARY AND HIDING IN THE DARK. EVEN BETTER. HELP A BROTHER OUT HERE #blood blossom au #for the time being thats the name

[suzukiblu]

Ko-fi thank-you WIP excerpt behind the cut, as promised, friends; 7k of kidnapping your soulmate for fun and profit. (and non-chrono link for anyone on the app.)

Tana Moon follows Leech over to the group, looking a little wary herself. Tim sizes her up in his peripheral vision, pretending not to notice her approach. He’s “just” found out who his soulmate is, so he can sell the illusion of only paying attention to Superboy right now. It’s not an unusual reaction. 

It’s a pretty typical one, actually. The fact that Superboy decided to immediately show him off to everyone he knows is actually the less usual option, in fact. Not unheard of either, of course, but still. A lot of newly-discovered soulmates tend to just forget about the outside world for a few hours. Or days, even. A few missing person cases that Tim’s been involved in solving turned out to be cases of “I met my soulmate and we just eloped/ran away/went on a road trip/holed up in a hotel room without telling anyone”. 

Tim had thought it was ridiculous at the time, if obviously preferable to ending up with either a dead body or a traumatized victim, but Tim is currently in the process of planning an ethically-necessary kidnapping less than twenty-four hours after first cracking into Superboy’s file, so he supposes soulmates just bring out most people’s less pragmatic sides. 

Though he personally thinks carefully-planned ethical kidnappings are an improvement on spontaneous weekends in Vegas, pragmatically-speaking. But whatever. 

“He showed you?” Tana Moon says, glancing Tim over suspiciously. Superboy’s face reddens this time and he tugs at the slash in his own suit. 

“He, uh, saw mine first,” he says. “Kinda got into it with a dude downtown and Tim here was in the area, and like, he recognized it, obviously.”

“It’s fairly noticeable as a mark,” Tim supplies helpfully, figuring he should be being supportive of his soulmate here, and also be shutting Rex Leech up as efficiently as possible. “And Superboy came over to check on me after the fight, so it was hard to miss.” 

“Sure it was,” Leech says, his face souring. “So then you won’t mind showin’ yours to–” 

“Shut up, Dad!” Roxy hisses, kicking him viciously hard in the ankle. Leech yelps in pain. Roxy is immediately his favorite, Tim decides. By far Roxy is his favorite. The dog’s kind of cute and Dubbilex seems decent, but definitely Roxy is his favorite. 

Her dad definitely fucking sucks, though. 

And as for Tana Moon . . . 

“You’re a tourist?” Tana says, just barely frowning down at Tim. She’s taller than him. She’s also taller than Superboy, because she’s a grown-ass woman and why, exactly, is a reporter even here right now? How is that necessary or reasonable? 

. . . admittedly she’s also taller than Leech and he’s a middle-aged man, but that’s not the point here. If Tim has to “no comment” this situation and figure out how to get either his parents or Bruce to kill a story, he absolutely will. He isn’t even slightly gonna hesitate there. He is gonna the opposite of hesitate, in fact. 

“Yes,” he lies, which might not endear him to Moon, given she’s a native, but is better than confessing to having premeditated designs on kidnapping a teen idol superhero. Especially to a reporter. 

Even if it is legally salvage. 

“I’m just in town for the day,” he continues. “I needed to get away for a little while, you know how it is.” 

“Sure,” Moon says, narrowing her eyes at him. “Who doesn’t.” 

“He’s from Gotham. And he helped the civilians get out of the area while I was fighting that guy downtown!” Superboy says eagerly, which is . . . odd, actually, and throws Tim off a bit. That seems like a weird thing for Superboy to be eager about, considering. Like . . . just very weird. 

“Well, that’s a Gotham thing, probably,” Tim says, putting on a sheepish Civilian Smile (#7). “We’re used to rogue attacks with area of effect concerns involved, so we get pretty good at clearing a street.” 

“You did awesome,” Superboy says, grinning excitedly at him. That is . . . still weird, yeah. Tim really doesn’t get it. 

Well, maybe Superboy’s just relieved to have a soulmate who knows how to stay out of the line of fire and what to do in a crisis, given how often crisises probably come up in his life. That would make sense, considering. 

“It was nothing, just a little light crowd control,” Tim tries, assuming that’s what a normal civilian would say. Probably, right? Almost definitely. “Nobody even needed any urgent medical attention. And you used your TTK really strategically and contained the guy too, that was much more impressive to pull off in a mess like that.” 

Yeah, that was normal civilian talk, he thinks, pleased with himself for managing it. 

Superboy turns pink, then grins again. Dubbilex . . . tilts his head. 

Normal. Normal. Normal civilian. That’s what Tim is. A civilian! Who’s normal! Very, very normal! 

Normal. 

He smiles Normal Civilian Smile #4 and pats Krypto’s head again. Krypto makes an enthusiastic attempt at licking his fingers off. 

Ew. 

“‘Light crowd control’,” Moon echoes. That’s what Tim said, yeah, so he’s not sure why she’s repeating it. Well–reporter, again, so It’s probably a trap. 

It’s almost definitely a trap, actually. 

Really definitely it’s a trap. 

“Sorry to just show up like this, hope I’m not interrupting anything,” he says to Roxy and Dubbilex with a smile, politely pretending not to be ignoring Moon. He is definitely ignoring Moon, though. Again: reporter. She may not be a Lois Lane or even a Vicki Vale, but he’s still not giving her any information he can avoid giving her. And he’ll just ignore Leech while he’s at it, too. 

“I invited you, man!” Superboy says with a laugh, shaking his head. “We’re gonna hit the beach for a while, go hang out. Just swung by to grab Tim a swimsuit I can lend him.” 

“You came to Hawaii to ‘get away’ and didn’t pack a swimsuit?” Moon says skeptically. 

“Yup,” Tim replies with the most placidly innocent expression he’s ever worn in his life. Nothing. He is giving her nothing. Let all her reporter instincts strike against mirrored glass and high-security privacy windows and come to naught. 

Moon stares at him in silence, clearly waiting for him to fill it. Tim doesn’t fall for the incredibly obvious bait and just keeps the placidly innocent expression on. 

She frowns. 

“C’mon, man,” Superboy says cheerfully, apparently–and fortunately–oblivious to their stand-off. He grabs Tim’s arm and drags him towards the front porch. Tim seriously doubts its structural stability, from the look of it, but tactile telekinesis is hard to argue with. 

The steps manage not to collapse–possibly also because of tactile telekinesis, Tim can’t help suspecting–and Superboy pulls him straight into the house, which is . . . not particularly well taken care of, no surprise. The furniture looks like it all came from a thrift store, and not a nice thrift store. 

Admittedly Tim’s upbringing might be showing here, but also the corners need swept and there’s random boxes of assorted Superboy merch everywhere, most of which looks like cheap junk, and a huge stack of mail and four empty pizza boxes on the coffee table and overflowing trash cans with random junk scattered around, and it’s just . . . it doesn’t look taken care of, no. Which is something Tim would expect from a teenager or two, and maybe Dubbilex doesn’t know how chore wheels work or whatever, but fucking Rex Leech should at least be capable of getting out the broom once a week. 

Assuming there is one, anyway. Tim isn’t particularly optimistic on that one, honestly. 

Superboy’s room is even messier than the living room, covered in dirty clothes and abandoned comics and crumpled-up papers, but Tim’s bedroom looks like a bomb went off in it so he’s not gonna judge. Anyway, that’s Superboy’s personal space, not a common area. He can keep it however he likes, Tim figures. 

Somebody should really sweep that living room, though. And throw out those old pizza boxes, too. 

Tim isn’t judging, just–well, no, he is very much judging, actually. Specifically what he’s judging is Rex Leech, noted asshole sleazeball manager with predatory business tactics. 

Fuck that guy, seriously. 

“You want trunks or a speedo?” Superboy asks as he lets go of his arm to fly over to the cluttered dresser. Tim turns seventeen different shades of red and nearly disassociates. 

“Trunks,” he says quickly. “Please.” 

“Gotcha, man,” Superboy says easily, and then all the dresser drawers yank out at once and dump out crumpled piles of . . . mostly swimsuits and super-suits, it looks like, yeah. Like, basically nothing else but swimsuits and super-suits and a couple of cheesy-looking Hawaiian shirts. 

Well, that might be one lonely, lonely pair of cutoffs sticking out from underneath the swimsuits. But otherwise, that’s pretty much it, yeah. 

Fuck, that’s depressing, Tim thinks. 

Superboy comes back over with an armful of swimsuits, just about all of which have the S-shield either printed or stitched on them. Tim wonders why the guy even has this many swimsuits, especially considering he barely has any other clothes at all. At least not as far as he can see, anyway. 

He also wonders if he’s gonna die if he wears Superboy’s clothes. Is that a thing that might happen? Because it really might happen, yeah. 

Also wearing something with an S-shield on it feels like just a little too much to handle right now, so Tim’s hoping for a basic black option to be buried somewhere in that pile. Given Superboy’s apparent fashion sense, it seems unlikely, but hope springs eternal. 

“Take a look, see what’s good,” Superboy says, dumping the entire armful of swimsuits on Tim. Tim’s just grateful he remembered to stick to just the trunks, at this point. 

“So you spend a lot of time on the beach, huh?” he says wryly. 

“C’mon, man, it’s Hawaii,” Superboy says with a sheepish grin. “And I mean, I look good in anything but wet leather is just not a comfortable fit, you know?” 

“I guess it wouldn’t be, no,” Tim says, giving him Civilian Smile #4 again. Superboy’s ears redden a little again, and then he leans back and zips back across the room to shove all his drawers back shut. Tim lays out the pile of swimsuits on the bed, since it’s right there anyway, and then immediately feels embarrassed to be this close to Superboy’s bed. Which is stupid, even if they aren’t platonics. They’ve just met; it’s not like anything’s gonna happen. 

. . . even if Superboy is a notorious flirt and totally shameless and–

Tim is just not gonna pursue that line of thought right now, he decides. Just for his own sanity and all. 

He accidentally knocks some paper off the bed as he’s laying out the suits to get a look at them, and reflexively leans down to pick it up. The room’s a mess, yeah, but it’s Superboy’s mess. It’s still rude to just drop shit wherever. 

The paper isn’t as crumpled as some of the others, and Tim sees a glimpse of color as he picks it up. His inner detective reflexively wonders what it is, and . . .

Tim uncrumples the paper a little, and blinks down at it in surprise. It’s a little kid’s drawing, it looks like. A sunny beach rendered in bright colored pencil and simple, awkward shapes all painstakingly but clumsily colored in and–

Superboy’s suddenly right back next to him snatching the paper from him and immediately hiding it behind his back, looking absolutely mortified. Tim’s confused, for a moment. What’s he embarrassed about? It’s obviously not anything he’d have drawn himself. It’s probably just something a fan or a neighbor’s kid gave him, or . . . 

Tim pauses. Then he recontextualizes just how much of the crumpled-up paper is lying around Superboy’s room and wonders, very briefly, if a bunch of STEM majors with delusions of grandeur would’ve bothered programming their custom-designed “Superman” with anything resembling art skills. 

So . . . maybe that is something Superboy drew himself. If Cadmus didn’t program him with the muscle memory or knowledge of how to draw . . . well, then he probably would draw like a little kid, wouldn’t he.

And given Superboy’s cocky, braggart personality and defensive ego and how all that paper is all crumpled up as if in frustration . . .

“Gift from a fan?” Tim “assumes” with Smiling Civilian Face #4, pretending to be oblivious. 

“Uh–yeah!” Superboy blurts quickly as he jumps on the provided excuse, though he keeps the paper behind his back. “Yeah, just–you know, just some kid gave it to me at a signing, whatever. Uh, bathroom’s through there, if you wanna get changed. Or like, whatever.” 

“Thanks,” Tim says, and resists the itching urge to peek at a few more of those crumpled-up papers. It’s just a lot of paper, especially if Superboy’s upset with the results.

He wonders why the guy draws so much, if he’s that frustrated and embarrassed by it. Maybe it’s a rebellion thing, since it’s something Cadmus didn’t want him to know how to do. Tim would definitely understand that logic, if he were in Superboy’s situation. Or maybe he’s just bothered not to know how and trying to teach himself to make up for the perceived failing. 

Or maybe he just likes it, Tim supposes. That’s an option too. 

Probably a less likely one, though, given that it’s Superboy. Not to be an asshole or anything, just it’s a lot easier picturing the guy assuming he should be able to do something and getting fixated on trying to pull it off than just, like . . . liking to draw. Also, judging by all that balled-up paper, it doesn’t seem like there’s much there for him to “like”, either.

Tim takes the plainest set of trunks with a drawstring waist, which are black and dark blue but still have an S-shield iron-on patch sewn onto their waistband, for whatever reason, and ducks into the bathroom with them. He realizes belatedly that said S-shield is probably going to rest right up against his soulmark, then feels like an idiot for feeling flustered by that idea and just sets his bag against the wall and starts getting undressed. 

He’s definitely wearing one of the spare shirts in his go-bag for this, he decides as he stuffs his clothes into his bag. Just–definitely, yeah. 

The trunks fit once he cinches the drawstring enough, but the S-shield definitely does rest right against his soulmark. Tim has never actually considered the sight of the S-shield to be, like . . . relevant or interesting outside of work, but he’s realizing that he sure does feel differently about it now that he knows his soulmate’s one of the people wearing it. 

Which is a little ironic, really, considering Superboy wears the S-shield as a branding thing or whatever and lets Leech slap it on whatever cheap shitty merch he can think of. Like, he’s probably the least respectful S-wearer there is. 

Tim pulls on a plain clean T-shirt and a short-sleeve button-down to go over it, figuring that’s beach-friendly enough. He should’ve packed sunglasses, probably, but he was a little distracted by his kidnapping plans and didn’t think to. 

Seriously. He didn’t think to bring sunglasses to Hawaii. 

This whole situation definitely has him off his game, yeah. 

Soulmate thing, he guesses.

Tim eyes himself in the bathroom mirror, mentally decides he’s being an idiot to worry about how he looks right now, and then grabs his bag and heads back out into the bedroom. Superboy’s changed into low-waisted S-shield-themed trunks of his own and flip-flops and nothing else, which does in fact give Tim an embarrassingly good and embarrassingly distracting view of their soulmark. It’s not quite distracting enough for him to miss the fact that the amount of crumpled papers strewn around the room has noticeably decreased, though. And there’s definitely more of them sticking out from under the bed and dresser and in the back of the closet than there previously were. 

Which is kinda cute, honestly, but Tim should probably not say that. Like, ever. 

“Thanks for waiting,” he says, smiling Normal Civilian Smile #4 at Superboy as he hitches his bag up a little higher on his shoulder. “And for the loan.” 

Superboy stares blankly at him for half a second, then seems to startle a little and puffs himself up. 

“Uh–sure, yeah!” he says quickly. “No problem, man. Anytime.” 

“‘Anytime’ seems pretty open, as an offer,” Tim jokes, because normal civilians make that kind of joke, and Superboy turns red. 

“Oh, uh–you know what I mean!” he sputters awkwardly, holding his hands up, which seems kind of a lot as a reaction, and then somehow manages to nearly knock over his dresser without even touching it. Well–that'd be the TTK, Tim guesses. 

It wasn't even that much of a joke. Like, lame suburban dad joke territory, that's all. 

“I do, yeah,” he says with a wry smile. Superboy finds a way to turn even redder and shoves his dresser back into a corner. That also seems like kind of a lot as a reaction, but Tim doesn't comment. Just seems, well . . . awkward? Unnecessary? “Are we good to go, then?” 

“Um, yeah, yeah,” Superboy says, clearing his throat and then zipping out into the hall. Tim wonders if he always flies indoors this much. “All good, dude! Let's head out.” 

“Sure,” Tim says, keeping the smile on. Superboy is still red, but floats along down the hall. Tim follows. Okay. They’re almost definitely not platonic, but Superboy clearly isn’t any more sure what to do with that than Tim is, so . . . small favors, he guesses. Like–that they’re at least roughly on the same page there, he means. 

Unless he’s just reading into things because of weird personal biases he didn’t even know he had, and Superboy is completely straight and just kind of socially awkward around civilians, and Tim’s just being socially pressured by the background radiation of living in a society that over-values romantic soulmates in comparison to platonic ones and sometimes disavows platonic soulmates altogether. 

He supposes technically they could be familial, rare as that is. It’s not like he really knows how he’d feel about having a brother. Dick’s the closest thing to one he’s ever had, and that’s just . . . not actually the same thing, obviously, even if sometimes he wishes . . . 

Anyway. It doesn’t matter. He’s pretty sure having a brother wouldn’t in any way involve this level of embarrassment and unexpected hormones and just general sexuality-questioning over every little thing. Like, that seems very much not like what having a brother would be like. 

So–maybe he isn’t straight, or maybe Superboy’s not actually a boy, or maybe both of those things are true, or maybe he’s just really, really bad at having a soulmate.

Entirely possible, under the circumstances. Tim’s not really all that good at getting close to people. If he got a little confused about how to handle having a soulmate, well . . . that wouldn’t really be a surprise, would it. 

Or maybe he just doesn’t want to have to figure out how to come out to his dad or Dana or the goddamn Batman. 

One or the other, probably.

. . . statistically speaking, the likelier explanation probably is not wanting to come out to the goddamn Batman. 

“Wanna fly someplace or just chill on the beach out front?” Superboy asks as he floats backwards into the living room. Krypto runs up and jumps on Tim excitedly, his tail wagging so hard his whole little body’s wagging with it. He’s a weird-looking little mutt, but he’s really friendly, apparently. “Krypto, oh my god, get off him.” 

“I don't mind,” Tim says, leaning down to give Krypto a polite little pat on the head. Krypto barks happily and wags his tail so hard he knocks himself over. 

Yeah, weird dog in general, Tim thinks. But again, really friendly. 

“We can go wherever,” he says. “You're the local, you know the best places to get a little time alone to hang out, right?” 

“‘Alone’?” Superboy repeats, his ears reddening again as he somehow manages to trip in mid-air and hits his head on the doorframe. Tim can probably safely write off the idea of “platonic” at this point, but is still a little bit wary of his personal bias interfering. Though . . . “Uh–yeah! Totally! Yeah! We can do that!” 

Yeah, Superboy really isn’t selling the “platonic” idea here either. 

Does Tim have a boyfriend now? Is this how boyfriends happen? 

. . . well, or a girlfriend, maybe. He still hasn’t ruled out the “maybe Superboy’s just trans” option. That seems like a thing that might confuse his sexuality a little, if nothing else. 

This is definitely not anything like any previous girlfriend-getting he’s experienced, though. Like, not even a little bit. He’s not complaining, exactly, because admittedly it’s actually a little bit easier going into a new relationship with a plan and a cover established, even if the plan is admittedly still in flux and the relationship’s “romantic" vs "platonic” status is still unclear. It’s still something he can approach like a case, which is much more straightforward than just floundering around trying to figure out how normal people work. 

And Superboy’s about as far from a “normal person” as it gets, so really, this is a pretty ideal set-up on Tim’s end. 

Hopefully Superboy feels similarly, though he also, like . . . is lacking some pretty important information there, so . . . yeah, that might be an issue. Bruce would definitely not have appreciated Robin telling Superboy he was his soulmate, though, and who knows how Superboy would’ve even taken that. Going in as a civilian is going pretty smoothly, though, so Tim’s pretty sure it was the right choice. 

Hopefully it was, anyway. 

“Cool,” Tim says, keeping up the placid harmless civilian face and thoughts and Totally-Not-A-Vigilante vibes. Superboy does a very bad job of pretending he didn’t just bump into the doorframe and ducks back outside, putting on a cocky grin of his own as he does. It occurs to Tim, briefly, that maybe Superboy has his own catalog of performative expressions. None of his friends really seem to, but Superboy is in the community too, so . . . well, it’d make sense, right? 

Also he does sell his likeness via a sleazy manager’s sleazy business deals, so yeah. It does kind of make sense. 

Huh. That’s . . . a thought, he guesses. 

Not a thought he’d really had yet. 

Just . . . something they might have in common, Tim guesses. 

Though so is being in the community to begin with, obviously. And they're physiologically about the same age and have similar coloring, though Superboy is–well, not actually mixed with East Asian, because Krypton did not have an actual place called “Asia”, but he does have subtle hints of that look, same as Superman. Easy to mistake for just being white, but recognizable if you know what you're looking for. Superboy would be at least half-white given Westfield's DNA, Tim guesses, but . . . 

Yeah, no, he doesn't even know how to begin to figure out the nuances of racial identity on a dead planet he knows next to nothing about, much less any potential experience parallels there might be for a second-generation half-alien immigrant with effectively zero access to their own culture, but maybe he could–

Right, okay, he needs to focus here. There's some fascinating stuff there that he can theorize about and investigate later, once he's kidnapped Superboy properly. The kidnapping is the current priority, though. Like, it is very much the current priority. 

Tim follows Superboy back out onto the porch. Everyone else is still out there, which is fine in regards to Roxy and Dubbilex and not fine in regards to Leech and . . . well, jury's out on Moon, maybe. 

Also the dog. He doesn't really know about the dog. Though said dog does run after him and jump up for attention wagging his scruffy little tail hard enough to wag his whole little body, which is sort of cute. 

Or as cute as a wet dishrag can get, anyway. 

Tim’s trying not to judge Krypto for that, since obviously he didn't ask to be born as the living embodiment of a wet dishrag, and anyway he's a really friendly dog, so judging by appearances seems like a dick move. Even if Tim kind of wants to iron him, to be honest. Steam-clean, maybe. 

At least take him to a decent groomer, if nothing else. 

“Down, you little shit, Jesus!” Kon says, scowling down at Krypto and trying to shoo him away. Krypto growls at him, which seems weird, then goes back to fawning all over Tim. Tim leans down and pats his head, figuring it might calm him down. 

“It’s okay,” he says. “He is cute.” 

“Whatever,” Superboy grumbles, folding his arms and inexplicably glowering at his dog. 

“You gonna go swim, or just hang out?” Roxy asks curiously as she comes over to them again. 

“Oh, we’re–” Superboy starts, but Moon cuts him off. 

“Want some company?” Moon inquires, pleasant and suspicious all at once. Superboy looks–conflicted, momentarily, and then awkward. 

“Um, well–Tim’s only in town for today, so . . . next time?” he hedges. Tim resists the urge to eye Moon. Can I just spontaneously insert myself in your first day with your brand-new soulmate? is incredibly rude, as a suggestion. And incredibly fucking disrespectful to boot. Like, what entitled-ass kind of thing is that to ask, exactly? 

How old is she again? Twenty? Twenty-one? He should look that up later. Well–no, she’d graduated college and started her career by the time Superman had died, which was a good eight or nine months ago now, so unless she skipped a grade or two in there, she’s gotta be closer to twenty-four, if not twenty-five or twenty-six. 

That’s . . . a thought, considering there is definitely news footage of Superboy kissing her in Metropolis. Like, Tim very definitely saw news footage of Superboy kissing her in Metropolis. And she was very definitely kissing him too.

In retrospect, that seems like something someone should’ve, like . . . done something about? Or at least addressed? And is definitely further proof of how fucking useless and slimy Rex Leech is. Sure, let the five-minute-old clone make out with a twentysomething reporter and hang out with her at home; all publicity is good publicity, so it’s fine, right? Sure. Why wouldn’t it be? 

Tim is going to absolutely decimate that bastard’s credit the first chance he gets. Leech probably already has terrible credit, mind, but he’ll make it worse. He’ll find a way. 

. . . though he’ll wait until he’s sure Roxy is eighteen and financially independent, he doesn’t actually know if she is or not. Roxy seems nice, she doesn’t deserve that particular fallout. 

“It’d be nice to get to know each other later, I’m sure,” Tim says before Moon can say anything, smiling Gala Smile #1 at her, which is a targeted psychological attack and not actually very moral to be trotting out this quick, probably. 

He has no regrets, for the record. Absolutely none. 

Moon narrows her eyes suspiciously. Tim blithely strokes Krypto’s ears, Gala Smile #1 flawless and unphased. 

“I’m sure,” she “agrees” frostily. Superboy remains apparently oblivious to the tension and grins brightly at both of them. 

“Cool!” he says. Oh, sweet summer child who has clearly never socialized with sharks, Tim thinks resignedly, petting Krypto again. Has Leech taught him literally nothing about conversational warfare, for fuck’s sake? At least living with your sleaze of a manager should be good for that, dammit! 

Then again, Leech is probably not actually competent enough to teach Superboy anything actually useful, so maybe that’s for the best. 

If nothing else, Superman could’ve taught him a bit of “bless your heart”, but apparently that’s not a thing either. 

Tim has a brief moment of dread that maybe underneath his personal list of performative expressions, Superboy might just be a straightforward and honest person, which is a concerning thought. He doesn’t even know how to talk to a straightforward and honest person at this point, after this long as Batman’s emotional support sidekick. How do you form a lasting relationship with someone who isn’t habitually using at least three layers of double-talk and constantly locked in on all your microexpressions, anyway? 

That’s going to be a weird experience, yeah. 

“Ready to go?” Superboy asks Tim, grinning brighter at him. Tim feels momentarily overwhelmed and just sort of . . . has to collect himself about that, a little. 

Or a lot.

“Lead the way,” he says, smiling at him. He’s flustered enough to forget to use an appropriately-planned smile, which is embarrassing, but Superboy just grins even brighter–which should not be physically possible, but apparently is–and reaches out to scoop him up into his arms and into the air again as Krypto lets out an offended bark. It’s totally overkill and not even slightly necessary. 

Tim isn’t complaining, just–well–

It’s really flustering. 

“Air Superboy up, up, and away!” Superboy says cheerfully as they float up over the others’ heads. His face is way too close to Tim’s face. 

Tim is gonna need a bit longer to collect himself this time, he’s pretty sure. 

“Do I get an in-flight meal?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. Superboy laughs, which is even worse than his grin, and then takes off across the beachfront with him. It’s another bridal carry, which is quietly mortifying but could be worse, probably. Maybe. 

Somehow. 

Superboy flies them straight across the beach and then straight out over the water, skimming them along just above the waves. Tim makes a briefly startled noise, reflexively tightening his grip on the strap of his bag. 

“This isn’t waterproof,” he says just as reflexively, and Superboy laughs again. 

“I’m not gonna drop you, dude,” he says. Tim actually more assumed Superboy was intending to either dive-bomb them both into the water or just dump him in on purpose, because that seems like Superboy’s sense of humor, but maybe that was an unfair assumption. 

He really is not prepared for how it feels to be held in close against Superboy’s bare chest and arms like this, even if he’s still wearing a shirt himself. The idea of possibly doing that while they’re both wet seems a lot worse. 

Yeah. Definitely worse. 

Tim should’ve worn long sleeves. And maybe a wetsuit. And maybe a few layers on top of that. 

Jesus. 

“I’m gonna hold you to that,” he says, barely resisting the urge to loop his arms around Superboy’s neck as the other hangs a right and swoops them back around towards shore. Flying over the water like this is a pretty cool experience, admittedly, now that he’s not worried about Superboy dumping him in the water. 

Well. Less worried, anyway. 

Camera next time, Tim promises himself, glancing back over Superboy’s shoulder towards the shining horizon. The sun reflects off the waves bright and beautiful, and the sky is a smooth and perfect blue dotted with sparse but billowing clouds, and everything smells like salt and sea and leather, which is probably Superboy, even without the jacket on anymore. 

Definitely camera next time.

“Definitely holding you to that, actually,” he says, and Superboy laughs again and brings them down in the surf just past the tideline with a splash. Neither the splash or the water goes high enough to soak Tim's bag, so he figures it could've been worse. 

Assuming Superboy isn't planning to toss him or anything before he can put his bag down somewhere safe, anyway. 

They both settle down into the surf and onto their feet, and Tim becomes very aware of how close together they’re standing and also how very, very shirtless Superboy is, and in fact the only thing between their soulmarks is the very thin layer of cotton of Tim’s own shirt, and if he leaned in just a little bit . . . 

Jesus, Tim thinks faintly, and forces himself to take a step back before he can make it weird. 

He smiles Generically Pleasant Civilian Smile #2 just to make sure he doesn’t look like a creep or anything, and Superboy grins excitedly at him. Tim allows himself all of two seconds to be overwhelmed by that gorgeous expression and their physical closeness and the reflection of the light in Superboy’s eyes, as bright and perfectly blue as both the sky and water, and then reasserts standard operating procedures and keeps Generically Pleasant Civilian Smile #2 locked in place on his face. 

“The water’s really warm,” he observes, glancing down at it. “Is that normal?” 

It’s probably not an impending supervillain thing, he tells himself. 

Maybe global warming or something, though.

“I mean, feels normal to me?” Superboy says with a shrug. Tim considers mentioning the average ocean temperature, comparatively speaking, or at least the average temperature of the water off the docks in Gotham. Admittedly, Gotham waters barely count as “water”, legally speaking, but that’s not the point. 

“It’s pretty out here,” he says instead, and Superboy grins at him and leans in. He’s pretty sure it’s more an instinctive thing than a deliberate one, just from the way Superboy does it, but that doesn’t exactly make it less flattering. 

Or flustering. 

“I mean, it’s Hawaii, man!” Superboy says, grinning wider before kicking at the surf. “‘Course it’s gonna be pretty!” 

Actually you specifically are possibly the prettiest damn thing that I have ever seen, Tim thinks, but isn’t stupid enough to actually let out of his mouth. Superboy, unfortunately, continues to be all warm and grinning and lit up by the island sun. Tim did not come prepared enough for this. 

“I don’t know, I’m pretty sure I’d be the guy who came to Hawaii and got a monsoon,” Tim says wryly, and Superboy laughs brightly. 

Tim really did not come prepared enough for this. Like, not at all. Not even slightly. 

“Guess you’d just have to come back, then,” Superboy says, grinning wider again and kicking at the surf again as he floats back up out of it. It’s–weird, a little, looking up at him like this. 

Well, not weird, just . . . yeah. 

Something like that. 

“Guess so,” Tim agrees, feeling embarrassingly flustered. Superboy’s friends can probably still see them from the porch, distant though it is, but part of him is still just considering very weird and dumb ideas like maybe tugging Superboy back down to earth and into the surf and just . . . confirming the little sexuality crisis he’s been having since breaking into the other’s file and seeing their soulmark in it, maybe. 

Just, you know, ruling things out. Making deductions. Going through the process of elimination. 

Kissing him, maybe. 

He could very, very much kiss Superboy right now. They’re on a gorgeous beach in the surf and under the sun and Superboy is floating in front of him and grinning as happy and excited as could be and Tim’s stomach is fluttering in a stupid and also-embarrassing way, and . . . 

He could kiss him. That’s all. 

“I mean, it’s a nice place to visit, right?” Superboy says casually, linking his hands together behind his back. 

“The tourism industry seems to think so,” Tim says wryly, and wonders what the “normal civilian who didn’t come here specifically looking for his soulmate to kidnap/salvage him to begin with” thing to say is here. He has absolutely no idea, because he actually has absolutely no idea how normal civilians react to superheroes. Robin is . . . not exactly an urban myth, necessarily, but definitely not a publicly-recognized superhero. He’s a vigilante that’s just barely allowed to operate outside the law, and not one with any kind of publicity or celebrity involved. 

eSuperboy, on the other hand, is not only a superhero, but a professional superhero. He’s selling his likeness and doing events and has signed a stupid predatory contract with a sleaze of a manager that technically shouldn’t even be legal, given Superboy isn’t even considered a legal person by the government. Apparently no one has ever realized that, though, or at least no one’s ever let Superboy realize that. 

Tim really doesn’t love that that’s a thing, to put it mildly. 

Actually, he just fucking hates it. 

Superboy laughs, and looks very, very pretty doing it. Tim continues to wonder what a normal civilian would do here, and for lack of a better idea falls back on small talk. 

God, his best plan right now is small talk. What is his life, even? 

No wonder he’s gonna have to take six months to kidnap Superboy, ugh.

“So, uh–this seems like a weird question to be bringing up this late in the conversation, but what’s your name?” he asks, because it’s occurred to him that he actually has no idea what Superboy goes by when he’s off-duty. He knows he doesn’t have a secret identity, of course, but there’s no way his friends just call him “Superboy”. Well–maybe his slimy asshole manager does, but otherwise. “I mean, if that’s okay to ask. Marks or not, I understand if you don’t feel like we’re there yet, given the whole superhero thing and all.” 

Robin knows Superboy doesn’t have a secret identity, after all, but Tim Drake is a normal civilian and shouldn’t act like he knows too much about any superhero in general, so–

“Naw, it’s fine, I don’t even have one,” Superboy says, for some reason just beaming at him, which is . . . weird, Tim thinks, but nowhere near as weird as that answer is. 

“You don’t . . . have one?” he repeats slowly, and Superboy shrugs easily. “Like–not at all?” 

“Yeah, everybody pretty much just calls me 'Kid' or 'SB', when it's not Superboy,” Superboy says. “Oh, and Knockout calls me 'Pup' when she's around but like, that's really just a 'her' thing. So, you know, you can call me whatever.” 

Tim stares blankly at him for a long, long moment, speed-runs all five stages of grief, and also discovers a couple of new and unexpected ones. 

Alright. Well, he officially regrets literally nothing about this impending kidnapping. 

“Oh, okay,” he says. “Um–sorry, I guess I just assumed you’d have a more . . . civilian-ish name too, I guess?” 

“I’m a clone, man,” Superboy says, looking amused. “The only other name I’ve got is ‘Experiment Thirteen’, which is definitely not something I answer to."

Tim discovers a few more stages of grief that hit with all the subtlety of a spiked baseball bat and makes himself nod as much like a normal person as he can. 

“Yeah, I don’t think I’d go for that one if I were you either,” he says. “Kind of a mouthful, if nothing else.” 

Superboy laughs, then grins at him again. He is actually doing so, so much of that, Tim’s realizing. Tim was really not prepared for how much of that he’s been doing, in fact. He just did not come prepared for any of that at all. He’s got some nebulous kidnapping plans, but everything else here–from the supervillain attack to Superboy’s ripped suit and exposed soulmark–has been a crime of opportunity. 

He probably should’ve done more research. Actually, he definitely should’ve done more research. He kind of just panicked and bought a ticket and flew right over, and just because Dick didn’t stop him doesn’t mean it was a good idea. He just–he should’ve done more research. Planned more. Not shown up without something concrete. 

Admittedly Superboy doesn’t hate him yet or anything, but this was just . . . yeah, this was not his brightest idea at all. Not even slightly. 

Why didn’t he do more research? 

“You really can just call me whatever you wanna, don’t worry about it,” Superboy says with an easy shrug as he settles back down into the surf, which, unfortunately, puts him back into kissing range and is therefore incredibly distracting. 

Dammit, Tim thinks, trying to beat his stupid teenage hormones into order. 

“Whatever I wanna?” he repeats. 

“Except for Experiment Thirteen,” Superboy says with another grin. Tim politely pretends not to notice the slight tightening of the corners of his mouth as he says the word “experiment”. 

“Uh, okay,” he says, clearing his throat. He guesses Superboy doesn’t really care what his name is, then, but being told to just call him whatever he wants to is . . . well, a weird feeling, maybe. “What do you do when you just want to be a civilian for a while, though?” 

“I don’t,” Superboy says. 

“. . . don’t . . . what?” Tim asks slowly, not sure if he should be dreading the answer or not, but–

“Be a civilian,” Superboy says. 

Tim’s running out of new stages of grief, he’s pretty sure. 

“Ah,” he says. 

Superboy–for a second, Tim thinks he looks self-conscious, but then he’s grinning again before he can be sure, and . . . 

“Why would I?” Superboy says, puffing up proudly. “I’m Superboy, man! Nothing else I’d rather be.” 

Given how limited Superboy’s options for anything “else” he could be probably are . . . well, Tim’s not sure what to think of that statement. 

He doesn’t think it’s anything good, though. 

Yeah, no, he thinks as he looks at Superboy’s too-bright grin and thinks about how he just said "nothing" and not "no one". Definitely not anything good. 

Who wouldn’t pick being “Superboy” over being “Experiment Thirteen”, after all? 

And what else would Superboy even know how to pick, if he thought those were his only options?

#timkon #tim drake #kon el #conner kent #dc robin #superboy #wip: kidnapping your soulmate for fun and profit

[inthememetime]

Alfred finds and adopts three homeless teens while the whole of the Batclan is away, the three teens are of course The Fentons. Alfred on the other hand had been dealing with a bit of Empty Nest Syndrome and takes the trio in, so by the time the rest of the Batclan filters back there are three extra people in the Manor but the Fentons deliberately ghost the rest of the residents.

I love this for four reasons:

The potential for Alfred, who wishes Bruce would stop adopting small violent children, realizing that HE is the same.

You can't tell me Alfred, Danny, Dani, and Jazz won't be BFFs. Jazz is the only (mostly) sane person in this house besides him. Dani absolutely WILL spy and report on injuries in exchange for more of that casserole. Danny and Alfred have similar sarcastic wit.

"If we had a nickel for every billionaire with a secret identity we know, we would each have 2 nickels. Which isn't a lot, but weird it happened twice."

The SHENANIGANS!!!!!

Shenanigans include:

At first, Alfred doesn't tell the Batfam because they're a family of detectives. Surely they'll notice. Over time, it becomes a contest of who can make them suspect the most without being found.

Alfred either playing it off or staring with a raised eyebrow when one of the Batfam asks why/if he's talking to himself.

Jazz can only be turned invisible in the nick of time so many times before somebody finds out about her. "It says here, Ms. Fenton, that you have a brother?" "Yes, Danny. He died. But don't worry, he got better!"

When Tim is forbidden caffeine for a week, Danny drinks his coffee super fast or Dani replaces it with chamomile tea with black food coloring.

Dani: "You know Dick, you really shouldn't do that."

Dick, after a moment of panic, realizing there's nothing in the room with him. "....God?"

Dani, realizing how much chaos she can cause: "yeah, that's me! God."

Danny and Dani take turns being human just to walk past open doors. They all look enough alike to Tim, Dick, Damien, and a young Jason in uncertain light that the rest of the fam has to do double takes.

When someone calls Constantine over as a favor, he takes 2 steps into the manner, says no, and RUNS.

"So I've heard the voice of God, and it sounds like a 14-year-old girl."

"....how hard did Bane hit you again?"

"God says Jason is the one who stole your book."

"...right ok."

Bruce decides he's gonna go be Batman while wounded. He snuck out, so Al calls his Secret Ghost Squad.

Batman is repeatedly interrupted (*cough* saved) by 2 OP glowing metas. Constantine will no longer cross Gotham's borders.

Danny: "You need more ectoplasm. You're a growing half-ghost."

Jason: *shoots the wall* "WHAT THE FUCK WHO WAS THAT?!"

Danny: would you believe it was God?

Jason: NO

Jason figures it out first because he's being parented by a dead guy. He actually doesn't mind that much because he gets to visit the GZ

Cass figures out second because she's observant.

Dick figures it out third by spraying 'God' with paint. He then realizes he attacked an invisible creature that can go through walls with no idea how to fight it.

Tim figures it out by deliberately putting salt in his coffee to see what would happen.

Damien finds Cujo. He is Upset that Cujo already has an owner. Danny tells Damien in exchange for Damien to stop yelling insults at him. (Dani calls him Weak for this, and tells Damien 15 minutes later because he thought she was calling HIM weak and had Opinions)

"Oh shit."

Steph bribes the 'house spirits' for prank help, and then tricks them. They tell her out of Respect.

Duke starts talking to himself about star output on his homework, gets stuck, and SpaceBoi helps. Duke's 10 minutes into stars actually being interesting for once before he realizes he's talking to a ghost.

Bruce has been introduced to them by Jazz. Alfred made her after the 4th sleepless night due to researching the surprise metas.

Dani: its cool dude, but now I have to go prank Tim. Bye!

Vlad shows up for a private meeting with Bruce Wayne. The ghosties reveal themselves in order to kick his ass.

Alfred is the only person who can get away with calling Danny 'Daniel' and Dani 'Danielle'. Anyone else has Serious Regrets.

The Joker breaks Alfred's leg in a bombing. He's never seen again. Danny, Dani, and Jazz are a little TOO innocent

#inthememetime #danny phantom au #ask answered #dp x dc #come ask me things! #batfam

[sicariodechinchulines]

Damijon headcanon: Dami doesn't flirt, he COURTS.

•We tend to forgot WHERE and HOW Damian was raised. He just doesn't get the concept "Highschool sweetheart". when he first mentioned that, they were at a gala.

"-Im not interested on playdates, that's a waste of time.-" and they nodded because that's SOOO him, but then... "-If someone is interested on my being and dare to ask for my hand, I expect them to be ready for marriage. If not, then is just to be mean a ephemeral game that I won't even bother to remember, they shouldn't either."

Unnecessary to say that reporters we're so fucking excited with that response, so much that they didn't notice Dick Grayson hanging from a chandelier.

• and yes, he had a girlfriend before, even shared some kisses with other ladies and acted like a gentleman for them, but the truth is: he didn't take them seriously.

• Dami was ready for living alone and single, that's not the big deal, but Jon appeared again, and things started to get weird... in an amusing and warming way. Jon was now a mature good looking man, strong and good-natured as always. The little naive and childish boy was gone, and now was a man; a man worthy of his attention, in any areas.

• Without saying ANYTHING about his feels, he started to court Jon in the way he learned was appropriate, the problem is: Jon Kent is not a lady.

AND IS NEITHER SINGLE.

• Flowers, luxurious gifts and expensive jewelry. People started to suspect if Jon became some type of sugar baby for Damian, but when is questioned, Jon unsuspecting, answer "I don't know, rich people are weird"

• yes, people, Damian does HOLD the doors open for Jon, while ignoring the people behind, usually ending on them smashing their faces with the door.

• They rarely travel on cars, but when they do, Dami open the door for him; the bats are BEWILDERED by that.

• Needless to say that Jay DOES want to beat the shit out of him. (I don't blame him, if a sort of Arabic prince- heir of one of the biggest fortune in the world- a fucking Robin is trying to conquer MY boyfriend, I would love to beat the shit out of him too.)

Even if he's mad at him, don't see the point on competing with a child, because after all he's not even 15.

• Everyone knows that this boy is weird in SOOO many ways, but waiting 4 years until the object of your courtship is legally able to touch you, is little to much... even for Superman, who lost his virginity in his late twenties.

• Clark never say anything about that matter, first because he doesn't want to feed rumors, and second..

Because if he ADMIT that he would be okay with Damian marrying his son, Batman will KILL HIM.

•Even if he is worried about the future that Damian and Jon hold as best friends or partners, he can't denied that Damian devotion to Jon is cute.

Sorry but Clark is a hopeless romantic who loves his wife DEEPLY

(and he doesn't like Jay at all, he doesn't knows him as much he would like, neither is happy with the amount of info about his son that is on internet now thanks to jay's activism... but this ray of sunshine don't talk about that because, wHAT IF HE IS BEING HOMOPHOBIC OR SOMETHING?? Don't want to stress his boy with that.)

• after the SHOW Damian Wayne gave at that gala talking about his expectations on a partner and the PROPER way of courtship, the rumors about the younger Wayne being a heartbreaker like his father were over. NOW, they love to talk about how amazing and romantic Damian would be as a boyfriend.

When in an interview, a reporter mentioned Tim Drake-Wayne the titular "The teens dream: A prince like Damian Wayne. His thoughts about dating and how court a lady" he dissociated for 1 whole minute.

• the worst-best come now. Still hanging from that titular a journalist did DARE to ask about PRE-MARITAL SEX. (yes, Bruce demanded that journalist, yes, Bruce won.)

"- Isn't obvious? I'm against it, at least for myself. I don't find shame on waiting the proper person to lost your virginity with... even if I fall in love with SOMEONE who isn't virgin anymore, I'll wait anyway."

And yes, that was a hint for Jon. Jon didn't get it, but the press did.

It was funny how teen boys were so spiteful towards him and how teen girls were so delighted. Damian set the bar so high for Gotham boys.

• even with all the gifts and flowers and food, Jon is the ONLY ONE who don't notice. His mother did, his father did, Batman, Redhood, RedRobin and Nightwing DID, even StARFIRE AND THAT'S A LOT. a night after a mission she just said "Correct me if I'm wrong... but the little Robin is courting Superman according his culture standards, isn't?" And the whole Bat Boys just stared.

"That's adorable... a little gentleman!"

• They usually cuddle. It was hard for Jon getting used to it after YEARS gone, but Damian was weirdly okay with it, even pleased Jon can say.

But there was something unsettling. He don't cuddle him as before, instead he do it in a way that makes Jon feel incredibly conscious about himself, but safe anyway.

Damian does it on purpose, holding Jon head close to his chest when they are on the couch, caressing the side of Jon's jaw and lightly touching his temple.

If Jon is being lucky and Damian too tired, he will press his nose against his curls and close his eyes, answering anything with a lazy "mmh"

• Bruce is worried. He's not Clark, he's not tHAT optimistic. He knows his son and how unhinged and dangerous he can be, and see this said devotion as a time bomb. What if Jon is not that good??? Or Damian manage to CONQUER the teen's heart and decide to guide him into a darker path???? Jon probed that he can DIE for him in most of one occasion, Damian is starting to act the same and is unsettling.

Sorry if isn't readable, my mother language is Spanish and i learned English from comics, translator and weirdly poetic AO3 p0rn. If you're that kind, please point out my mistakes or care to give me an advice so I can better my grammar, ty so much!!!!

#damijon headcanon #damian wayne #damijon #jon kent #superman #jonathan kent #damian al ghul #headcanon #dc robin #dc comics #dc headcanon #jondami #jondami headcanon

[fishfingersandjellybabies]

Thought of a celebrity AU where Jon and Damian were on the same popular kids show together that gave rise to a lot of teen and adult idols. Damian preferred being more behind the scenes and got into directing. Damian also coming from a long line of trained entertainment stars and wanting to go the director route like Bruce. Jon became the big heart throb and Damian constantly uses Jon as his muse in his filming. Damian’s films helped him transition from that heartthrob to a series artistic actor with critical acclaim.

oooh that'd be fun! and just because I recently saw the trailer for that tell-all about the 90s/00s nickelodeon days shadiness, imagine that Damian found out that Jon was mistreated as a child actor, that Damian only found out long after the fact. And yeah, he's already an established director and climbing the ranks in the entertainment world, but suddenly Jon wakes up to a million texts and BREAKING NEWS banners all over his phone-

Because Damian was arrested after beating up the executive producer from their child acting days. and not just beat up, like literally almost murdered. And witnesses reported hearing him screaming at this producer, "This is for what you did to him, you bastard!" between every punch and kick and hit. And the producer, the sleazebag that he was, at some point probably shouted back like, "You're finished in this town, Wayne! You're done!" to which Damian replies, "I don't give a fuck, so long as he's safe from fuckers like you."

and Jon sits there seeing all the tweets and messages and news reports and videos and just starts crying, because it was all for him. He knows it. And it's because Damian loves him, is in love with him, and he's in love with Damian too, but now? Now, as Damian's in jail and they're separated, it might be too late for them. After all these years.

#jondami #damian wayne #jonathan kent #also shippy headcanons #au chattering #kidding of course we know famous folks are held to different standards #damian gets out of jail and they live happily ever after making a24 films #asks #anon

[bruciemilf]

Omggggg I'm in love w your teen Bruce au!!! Do you have any teen!Bruce and Duke thoughts? Or how teen Bruce would interact w Hal? I'm ahshshshd

OOo, I think Duke would be a bit of an enigma for a teen bruce; He's a nice boy. That's why Bruce is inclined to believe there's something seriously wrong with him.

" What's the ultimate goal here?"

" Are you asking because you want to know, or because you're looking to burn bridges? Cause that doesn't work on me."

Secondly. He doesn't take any of his shit.

" Yeah, you're not really the angry type," Bruce likes the hatch; perfect place to read psychology reports on yourself, if he has to say so himself.

Let no one say Duke isn't accurate,

" Very nice dissection of me, by the way. Self-esteem deficiency, self serving, -- I've never been called a hyperbolic altruist before. That's new."

Duke shrugs, " I learn as I go."

" I think you forgot stupid."

" I don't believe in that."

" Of course you don't," his mouth tugs upwards, just slightly, " seriously, thought. Why protect this city? What's the gain here?"

"The same reason you do It. "

" What? Love?" Bruce snorts, " No one protects their parents' killer out of love. You think I do this cause I'm good? I do it because I'm angry. "

" Gotham killed your parents. Not mine. It's never been about the city. It's about people. I'm not going to be bullied into not caring about people. Because you refuse to do that."

"A whole lot of good that did. I have a fucked up boxing match I'm destined to lose until I snap, and 7 kids who hate me."

" We don't hate you. You hate you."

He can't argue with that.

#also i think teen bruce interracting with the league and hal is really cool!! maybe a scene where they're interrogating someone and hal #is like. feeling guilty cause he had to use force. 'thats adorable' 'you think its adorable to punch a guy with space brass knuckles?' #teen bruce using his watch: 'i think its adorable thats the worst you can do' #bruce wayne #duke thomas #duke having psychological profiles of his family is interesting to me #text

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

When Our Shadows Disappeared

by HoneyDewed_LemonDrops “Robin, report,” Batman, not Bruce, chimes, and Tim internally breathes out in relief. At least they’d gotten into the normal system, which meant they were free for the most part. The person doesn’t fight him as he stares down at them. “I lost them,” He lies. It doesn’t matter. He tugs the device out of his ear and drops it. He hears it buzz and die when he steps on it. It doesn’t matter, the trackers are still live. If both Batman and Nightwing are free, he gives it about three minutes before one of them shows up. He freezes when he meets their eyes, because they’re the same ones that look back at him in the mirror. No. — Or: I wanted to write a Cass and Tim twin au because there’s tumblr posts of them but no fics and they’re so sosjsbrownanebrbr Words: 8163, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 4 of Mostly Unconnected Batfam One-Shots Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: Gen Characters: Tim Drake, Jack Drake, Janet Drake, Cassandra Cain, Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson Relationships: Janet Drake & Tim Drake, Tim Drake & Jason Todd, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson, Cassandra Cain & Tim Drake, Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, Cassandra Cain & Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne Additional Tags: Good Parent Janet Drake, like I made myself like her when writing this, BAMF Tim Drake, Jack Drake is Not Tim Drake's Biological Parent, Tim Drake-centric, Janet Drake is Not Tim Drake’s Biological Parent, Cassandra Cain and Tim Drake are Siblings, Assassin Tim Drake, Good Sibling Tim Drake, Tim Drake is Not Okay, Tim Drake Needs a Hug, Good Sibling Cassandra Cain, BAMF Cassandra Cain, Protective Cassandra Cain, Assassin Cassandra Cain, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake Whump, Tim Drake is Not Red Robin, Cassandra Cain is Not Black Bat, Cassandra Cain is a Wayne, Hurt Tim Drake, Hurt Cassandra Cain, Cassandra Cain and Tim Drake Are Twins, Aged-Down Cassandra Cain, Tim Drake is a Menace, Dead Jack Drake and Janet Drake, Good Parent Bruce Wayne, Good Sibling Dick Grayson, Functional Wayne Family, as in their relationships are fine and dandy and nothing is bad, protective batsiblings, that should be a tag fuck off, Yes beta we come back like all the robins, Batfamily (DCU) Feels, Cassandra Cain Joins the Batfamily Early, French Tim Drake, Tim Drake Speaks French, Asian-American Tim Drake, hes technically Japanese but was raised in France, Jason is in this once, there is a planned sequel but idk if I’ll be able to do it, Dick Grayson is Nightwing, No beta we die like janet, for now via https://ift.tt/nZL7fpi

#IFTTT #bruce wayne #batman #the dark knight #the caped crusader #gotham #dcu #dc #ao3 #ao3feed

[laufire]

march reading meme!

BOOKS

A Study in Scarlet by Arthur Conan Doyle. Letters from Watson sent this from January to March, alongside a couple of other shorts ("The Field Bazaar" and "The Man with the Watches"). An interesting thing about it is that Sherlock was portrayed as somewhat bitter on the issue of credit (he does all the work, subpar investigators take underserved glory), while he's usually, in both ACD's later works and adaptations, portrayed as ~above such feelings. "The Field Bazaar" was interesting in that, in describing why Watson is a good "foil" for Sherlock's smarts in the books, actually illuminates why I think the smart investigator/fumbling idiot dynamic just. Fucking sucks for me lol. I don't get a kick out of it, I much prefer when they pair two investigator of different talents and portray those as both interesting and helpful in their investigations.

Investigating Lois Lane: The Turbulent History of the Daily Planet's Ace Reporter by Tim Hanley. Amazing read. It takes you through the history of the character, often looking at it through the lense of real-life issues and movements, getting into the different eras, adaptations, etc. It's giving me a lot to think about, both within the dc fandom and outside it.

Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri. This one I also read in substack newsletters, going for about a year, the last one being sent in March. It was a reread, and I maintain it's a book everyone should at least try to read. Inferno is by far my favourite part (the theology lessons in Paradise grate on me, in comparison).

Batman: The Ultimate Evil by Andrew Vachss. This book was written by a crime fiction author and attorney that specialices in representing children and in child abuse cases, who was approached by DC to write a book featuring Batman facing child sex trafficking. In the book, Bruce ends up discovering that his mother, Martha Wayne, was a sociologist who was investigating a child molester ring, and that's what caused their deaths. That's what caught my eye first, because really, how many canons give any weight and importance to Martha? If they opt to make the Wayne murders a conspiracy, it's always about Thomas's actions. I also appreciated that, even though the author clearly had to follow some dc-mandated lines (fictional country, individual villain), he practically hits you with a hammer when it comes to dispel a lot of the myths we have about child molesters and how they operate, specifically to challenge those dc-mandated lines. I wish we'd seen more of the social worker character, but I liked her as it was.

Snow Country by Yasunari Kawabata. I picked this novella exclusively for vibes and not plot, and it's what it gave me. It's also made me think a lot about how men see women, and how through their eyes our selves are twisted. Komako and Yoko are fascinating characters in part for how inescrutable the male lead finds them and how he might be misunderstanding them. There's so, so much hinted under the surface, about their persons and about their relationship.

The Lady Astronaut of Mars by Mary Robinette Kowal. Short novelette I picked on a whim. A 60+ yo astronaut is offered a chance to travel to space again, her dream come true. She has to choose between taking it, or staying with her ailing husband, who has little time left. The story apparently later expanded on some novels/prequels, I might pick them up.

COMICS

Secret Origins 80-Page Giant. I picked this one up for Steph's story (I'm going through her comic arcs), but ended up reading all the others. It's cemented my desire to pick up the Young Justice comics. These teens are sooooo chaotic and fun lmao, all of them (back then) with such weird and interesting backstories.

Lois Lane (1986). A two-part issue that shows Lois getting in deep in an investigation about child abductions. It's gets gruesome and heavy at times, but it's a great read, specially for her character. It shows Lois at a moment that the mainline comics seem to have ignored (she missed out on a great professional opportunity due to Superman), and it shows how obsessive she gets and how that is what makes her a great investigator and reporter. I also liked the glimpse at the dynamic between her and her sister Lucy there, how dismissive Lois was of Lucy's stewardess' job, for example.

DC First: Batgirl/Joker. I don't like it as much as the early-Batgirl (2000) run but it's kind of on that vein. Barbara tells Cass about her first encounter with the Joker, and Cass is determined to prove herself against him. I loved the art as well (very different than in the cover).

#reading meme #books #comics #dc comics #my thoughts #dc thoughts #id in alt text #captioned #lois lane #investigating lois lane: the turbulent history of the daily planet’s ace reporter #divine comedy #arthur conan doyle #batman: the ultimate evil #snow country #the lady astronaut of mars #secret origins 80 page giant #lois lane (1986) #dc first: batgirl/joker

[frozenangelcosplay]

The Case for Jimmywing

You can skip to “Let’s start at the beginning” for the actual content of what I’m analyzing.

So about a year and a half ago, I happened upon a trade paperback of “Superman’s Pal Jimmy Olsen: who killed Jimmy Olsen” at a comic book store we regularly drive an hour just to go to. I found the coat tail riding title self deprecating and hilarious and it instantly became a favorite of mine. And it fucking ruined my life.

For a split second I mistook Jimmy Olsen for being part of Nightwing’s “Ginger Harem” as they call it. I thought “he had to be, right? Like statistically?” He’s part of the young adult demographic, or ‘gen 2’ as I call them, he and Dick are both huge parts of Clark’s life to the extent where they gotta at least be friends, and no one would be shocked if he was one of the redhead’s Dick’s “collected” as they say. So why the hell was there nothing on the internet falling for this obvious set up?

(For context the human geography of fandom behavior is of high interest to me)

This was quite a bit of an anomaly, so I set out for some research. I brushed over results from the silver age initially and saw there was just one panel coming up with both of them in present art style (a twenty years in the future thing). It was more of a Jimmy Olsen cameo than anything where all I learned is they’re not familiar these days. I still liked the idea though and if I left my digging there I probably would’ve let it go a while ago. But then I looked INTO the silver age stuff and OH BOY IS THERE A LOT TO UNPACK HERE.

Long story short, they were written as close friends for years and I feel like DC is trying to gaslight me personally into pretending it didn’t happen. There’s a lot of potential to pick up where they left off with everything that’s happened in their stories since but there’s little to no sign of taking advantage of that anytime soon.

Let’s start at the beginning…

In 1940 both Batman and Superman separately acquired child sidekicks. A pair of eyes in the story the same age of the target audience’s to see themselves in and relate to. Robin would make his debut in the comics as Batman’s sidekick, would be Bruce Wayne’s legal ward, and also dawn combat training, gadgets, and a costumed vigilante identity. Jimmy Olsen would be a cub reporter at the daily planet where Clark Kent worked (a position specified beyond it’s dictionary definition as a teen internship position in “Superman Smashes the Klan”, which is set in the radio show cannon) and help at Superman’s side as himself.

Later, particularly with the classic comic run “World’s Finest”, in a world much less saturated with superheroes, let alone sidekicks, than we have today, the sidekicks of the stars of these comics easily became close friends. Most notable adventure by today’s standard would be World’s finest # 195, probably due to it’s shock and meme value cover of Batman and Superman making their sidekicks dig their own graves.

A personal favorite of mine would be World’s Finest #141 where the sidekicks run away to an island and fake their deaths, making it the first of at least twice they do that together (another being near the end of #195). Here they establish a secret hideout in the mountains in an abandoned observatory to keep souvenirs from their respective mentor’s adventures, and some of their own. (Notably two dummies of themselves Batman and Superman had just used to get back at them for pulling this stunt).

In Superman’s Pal Jimmy Olsen, Jimmy has also filled in for Robin twice. First time was to get Jimmy into the Mystery analysts (#111), second was to settle a bet after Robin beat him in a “Young Man of the Year” pageant (#130). In #111 this is where Robin trained Jimmy in combat, and some gadget use so he’s got that under his belt now enough to do it all again at least.

Also quick fun fact before I move on, Jimmy knew Robin and Batman’s secret identities LONG before he knew Superman’s. In World’s Finest #144, due to the fact that Jimmy was radiating kryptonite, he and Robin switched mentors and Batman pretty much immediately told him that he was Bruce Wayne, and Dick Grayson was Robin (told with Robin’s approval). A bit of an anomaly, but it carried forth in continuity.

Anyway, if you try to look up any shared adventure’s in recent comics, you’ll unceremoniously get nothing. I mentioned earlier Jimmy’s cameo in “Nightwing the New Order”, and there’s also like two crossed paths in the current World’s Finest run (a flashback continuity) and it just seemed like their dynamic then was just that Robin was relatively annoyed with Jimmy for being the one to debunk Mr. Mxyzptlk and Batmite’s disguises. (Rude?!)

I can’t find ANYTHING that explains this drift. My estimate would be that their dynamic died out some time between Dick joining the Titans and becoming Nightwing. But still remains a glaring connection.

Nightwing and Flamebird

So the first time that the Nightwing mantle debuted it was Superman as Nightwing with Jimmy as Flamebird. They went as these heroes into the bottle city of Kandor on multiple occasions. At the time they modeled these personas off of two kinds of birds found in Kandor, taking inspiration from Batman and Robin. The people of Kandor were convinced that Superman was actively refusing to grow the city again, and deemed him an enemy, which justified the disguises.

You still see this referenced every now and then, usually in museums and stuff, in fact, remember that observatory hideout? Statues and/or costumes of Superman’s and Jimmy’s Nightwing and Flamebird are on prominent display. In fact, Robin and Jimmy landed on naming the place itself “The Eyrie”, because as Robin said:

“In a way, we’re both birds. You’ve been Flamebird, and I’m Robin. So let’s call it the Eyrie!”

They revisit it now and then, but it seems to have been forgotten at this point.

Now since then there have been multiple pairs of Nightwings and Flamebirds. Obviously we know Dick Grayson is THE Nightwing and has been for a long time. The most consistent Flamebird however would be Bette Kane, and here’s where this gets interesting.

So there’s a full Krytonian legend surrounding Nightwing and Flamebird, from what I can tell, different versions, from heroes to gods etc. The most complete version I can only find on the wiki, so if you know where it’s from please let me know!

Here’s the link: https://superman.fandom.com/wiki/Nightwing_and_Flamebird

Here’s the quote:

“The true Flamebird is a massive, flaming dragon-like creature from deep in Krypton's past. The bird's partner is Nightwing, who is also its mate and opposite.

Among the early Kryptonian Gods, Flamebird was charged by almighty Rao with constantly refreshing the world by burning down the new creations of her brother, Vohc-The-Builder. She did so, but there was no hostility between the two; Vohc was grateful that Flamebird constantly pushed him to reimagine his works.

However, to help his friend, Nightwing, Vohc made it possible for him to meet flamebird. As such those two fell in love. Vohc's next creation was a monument representing all of his love for Flamebird. While Flamebird truly admired and appreciated the work, she fulfilled her duty to Rao by burning it down. This time Vohc actually begged for this work to be saved, but Flamebird ignored him. This destroyed much of Vohc and changed him into Vohc-The-Breaker. (Comic Series: Action Comics)

In each cycle, the Nightwing and the Flamebird are reborn, and must find each other. Also in each cycle, they are betrayed by a friend and killed.”

It cites action comics but I can’t narrow it down. My guess is that it came up when Thara Ak-Var and Chris Kent held the mantles.

So Bette Kane initially took up the Flamebird mantle to get Dick’s attention (while he was still Robin). He rejected her and it didn’t really work out which in the grand scheme of all things considered, makes sense thematically in a “pushing fate” kind of way. She was Flamebird for a while after that, even seen fighting beside Dick Grayson’s Nightwing every now and then, but hasn’t been Flamebird since before rebirth so currently no one seems to hold the mantle at present (technically).

So where does that leave Flamebird now?

Well this year, two interesting things have come up. One, in the new cartoon “My Adventures with Superman”, Jimmy is Flamebird again in the form of a username for his conspiracy blog. As of now, he just seemed to come up with it cause it sounds cool, so unless they pull out a “what a coincidence” or back story of how he found the name, that’s probably the extent of Flamebird’s roll there.

The second is in Action Comics #1058 where Kara reveals that Nightwing and Flamebird is actually the fable of the House of El. Each Krytonian house had a fable and this one is spesific to Superman and his family.

Now from here on out this is all just my thinking. “Theory” would even be a strong word implying that I legitimately think this is what is going on. Call this “if I were in charge of this story this is how this would go”

So what now?

Dick as a fated Nightwing makes so much sense for him. Pretty much all of his best qualities as a person can be seen in Superman and in it’s been said time and time again that he got the title from him. There’s that connection. That has my thinking that Nightwing and Flamebird would have a strong connection to the House of El, i.e., Superman. We know Nightwing is Dick, we know Dick looks up to Superman like, frankly most of the time, a better dad than Bruce. Low bar, but still.

And with this connection in mind, and all the history stated earlier with not just Jimmy’s long history with not just Dick, but Superman as well, he seems like the obvious choice to me. They state over and over again how Jimmy proves his loyalty, he’ll charge into danger like it’s nothing (a trait I personally think he picked up from Lois) and he is always such a fun narrator when handed the mic. He’s earned it.

As far as the ship goes, aside from it potentially being a huge payoff for a sixty year old saga of legends of love, heroism, and fate, the dynamics of their modern personalities would be unparalleled.

Over all its fricken WEIRD that their dynamic was just randomly forgotten like that, especially with everything built around them that you’d think would have them at least cross paths. I don’t hold not having a romantic relationship between them against DC, nor do I ever expect them to ever take that route any times soon, but come on man why aren’t they at least friends anymore?

#nightwing #flamebird #dick grayson #Jimmy Olsen #dc comics #comics #superman #krypton #worlds finest

[dairy-farmer]

Thinking about that ask you got with principal Bruce and student Tim and imagine when (bc it's a when, not an if lmao) Tim gets pregnant

He's in a low budget school now, so teen pregnancy is sadly common, but Tim is so tempted to drop out, sick of the judging stares and the stress of school work

But Bruce has him stay, just so he can watch Tim's belly swell with each passing month, see his little slut waddle the halls of the school, and at every given opportunity, Bruce has Tim bent over a desk or pressed up against a wall so he can fuck into his tight, pregnant pussy

I imagine Bruce also gets custody of Tim, like as a foster parent? Maybe even adopts him so that he can have easier access to Tim's pussy. He also "adopts" Tim's baby so that he can keep them close, and no one finds it strange, not even when summer break hits and by the time school has started again, Tim has another bump steadily growing under his sweater

Just another little whore, failed by the public school system. No one suspects that it's his principal/foster/adopted dad who keeps Tim nice and full of cum and babies for the rest of his school career and beyond!

YES!!!!!!!!!!!! tim gets pregnant and no one bats an eye because there's always some "teen slut" dropping out of school or attending classes with a pregnant belly and tim is no different but...teachers who had seen his "potential" express their disappointment that tim was no different from the other "future slut drop outs".

tim's foster family is very unhappy to learn of his pregnancy, he hears them argue late at night while tim lies awake in the room her shares with their snoring, youngest son. the husband wants to send tim away because neither of them signed up to deal with a baby, they were just looking for a free babysitter. but the wife has a soft spot for tim, apparently, she'd been a pregnant teen as well. either way, tim having a place at his current foster home is tenuous at best the further along he gets.

bruce finds out, mostly because he's nosy and makes a personal "home visit" to check out where tim is staying and he is very unhappy with what he finds. which is tim being a live-in babysitter.

bruce is already a registered foster parent and as the principle of the school tim attends, it catches a bit of media attention when it gets out that bruce is going to adopt one of his students, his very pregnant young teen student at that.

it's in all the papers and on the news- tim even gets interviewed asked about how he feels and he can't deny he's a bit excited. tim babbles on about how bruce had taken him baby shopping for clothes when he found out he was going to have a baby, that bruce always checked up onhim, brought him nice lunches, and kept him company in his office. a bunch of students try telling the reporters that the two of them are sleeping together but no one believes them because this is a miracle, a feel-good savior story and that doesn't fit in with the narrative that's been built.

tim never winds up having to take time off school because he gives birth after classes have ended for the year. the baby is precious and small and bruce never stops doting on their little baby. bruce adopting tim has done wonders for his image and gotham is even talking about giving the school more funding from all the press the school has gotten so bruce is very happy about that. tim is just happy he has his own room to be able to feed his little baby because his foster brother had been a little nosy and tim had no doubt he would've stared with wide-eyed everytime tim pressed a tit to his baby's mouth.

tim starts a new school in the fall. a private school, the one that dick and jason had attended when they went to live with bruce. bruce might be the principal of one of the worst-performing schools in the district but he can afford to put his children into better facilities!!! tim is back in the type of school he was used to attending before his parents died but before long its obvious he's pregnant once again.

the teachers at his school just shake their heads and sigh that that's just what happens when kids from....those types of schools come here. new home, new father, new school or not- tim's just another poor little whore who just can't help spreading his slut legs and giving it up to any boy who gives him a little bit of attention. of course he'd end up pregnant again in less than a year, some things just don't change no matter who his adopted father is.

poor principal wayne. he really had his work cut out for him.

#anonymous #asks #answered asks #brutim

[ao3feed-superbat]

Cloakrooms and Goatcheese Canapés

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/5XIH4We by sophie_in_hell03 When Bruce Wayne wakes up alone in the alley his parents were shot in, he can't remember anything since that night. He certainly doesn't remember he's Batman. But he's got an important gala tonight he can't miss, and he knows he can get through it, but - goddamnit why does that reporter in a cheap suit keep looking at him like a wounded puppy? He's trying his best to mingle and squeeze donations out of the one percent but good lord can this guy stop eye fucking him like - oh. OH. So evidently, like a huge JERK, Bruce has forgotten his own boyfriend/fuck buddy/lover/partner/whoever. No matter, Bruce can make it up to him in the coatroom. Words: 2692, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Superman - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Alfred Pennyworth, Dick Grayson, Lucius Fox, Lois Lane Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth & Bruce Wayne Additional Tags: Temporary Amnesia, Amnesiac Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent Knows Bruce Wayne is Batman, bruce wayne doesn't know hes batman, bc he forgot, Clark Kent is Superman, Clark Kent Needs a Hug, Clark Kent Loves Bruce Wayne, Pining Clark Kent, Bisexual Clark Kent, Bisexual Bruce Wayne, Wayne Gala (DCU), bruce is amnesiac but immediately thinks he's fucking clark, Fluff, Eventual Smut, Maybe - Freeform, Tags May Change, Rating May Change, How Do I Tag, no beta we die like jason todd, making out in cloakrooms, Kissing, batman is a great detective, bruce isnt lmao read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/5XIH4We

#ao3feed #superbat #world's finest #Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne #Bruce Wayne/Clark Kent

[calligraphist-artemisia]

Hidden in Plain Sight

Written for JayDick Week 2023, Day 6: Omegaverse | Arkham Knight | Fake Relationship

Part of the same series as Sweet and Sour, but can stand alone.

Also posted on AO3 (under the name KishiroKitsune)

@jaydick-week

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Hidden in Plain Sight

Tap tap. Tap tap. Tap tap tap.

Jason grunted in annoyance as he was dragged into wakefulness by a rhythmic rapping on his window. If it was Dick again-!

But it couldn't be. The aforementioned man was sound asleep next to him, breathing so softly that Jason had to focus to hear him. Jason didn't know how he'd forgotten that after the difficulty he had falling asleep, all-too-aware of the handsome Omega laying mere inches away. He had every intention of making up the couch as a temporary bed for himself, but Dick had insisted that “two grown adults can share a bed without it being weird” and that was the end of that conversation.

Tap tap. Tap tap.

Jason eased himself out of bed as carefully as he could and padded across the room the curtained window. He pulled it back just enough to get a peek at who (or what) was pestering him and scowled the moment he laid eyes on Red Robin's scarlet suit. He opened the curtain a little wider so he could pointedly gesture to Dick and then let go of it, letting it fall back into place.

There was a moment of silence as Jason started back to bed, but then:

Tap tap tap tap!

Red Robin had moved on to the living room window, it seemed.

Jason rolled his eyes. Fine. If Tim really wanted to talk at – he took a quick check of the time – two in the morning, then he was going to allow it. But if a single other Bat dared to come by, Jason was taking Dick and leaving the city.

Red Robin had let himself inside by the time Jason got out to the living room and was standing near the couch. He clicked on a nearby lamp, bathing the room in soft yellow light.

“Right. Let's get this over with,” Jason grumbled, running a hand through his hair.

What approach would Tim take with it? Would he list all of the reasons why Dick was better off staying at the manor? Or would he target Jason's obvious faults and use them to showcase why Dick would be safer with anyone else. (If he tried to use Jason's status as an Alpha against him, Jason was throwing him out of the window. Open or shut. He wasn't picky.)

“Dick is missing.”

Jason stared at him, unable to comprehend what he was hearing. “What?”

Red Robin seemed to shrink in on himself a little. “We don't know what happened, but he went missing from the manor some time after lunch. We've been searching since dinner – B's ready to file a missing persons report! You have to help us search!”

Jason thought of Dick, not lost but sleeping peacefully in the other room after deliberately seeking out Jason as a means of escaping Bruce and the others. He didn't want to ruin that, but wasn't it cruel to let Tim and the others believe he was missing?

But Red Robin hadn't asked if he'd seen Dick, only to help them with the search. What were the odds they'd done the same to Alfred? He'd have to ask.

“I'll keep an ear out,” Jason said, crossing his arms over his chest. “Now, if you don't mind, I'm going back to bed.”

Red Robin's cheeks turned pink. “Oh, um, yeah. Sorry to disturb you and your, um, guest,” he practically whispered the last word.

What. The. Fuck.

No, actually, no. Jason wasn't going to acknowledge that. Tim could work out whatever weird crisis he was experiencing on his own, because Jason certainly wasn't up for playing counselor to his teen-aged sort-of-brother.

He left Red Robin to lock up on his way out, tip-toeing back into the other room and slipping back beneath the bed covers. Dick mumbled something indecipherable as he rolled over and flung one arm across Jason's chest, snuggling up to his newfound source of warmth.

Jason made sure the Omega was settled before reaching over to grab his phone from the bedside table. He shot off a quick text to Alfred, figuring that if the rest of the family was out, then the old Beta was up and manning the comms.

Let me guess: they didn't ask if you've seen Dick or know where he is and jumped straight to he's been kidnapped? |

Because Timberly just showed up and told me he's missing |

And Dick is very much not missing since he's right here with me |

His phone pinged with a response less than a minute later.

| I apologize for the lack of warning. I'm afraid Master Bruce has gotten it in his head that Master Richard would not leave of his own volition. By the time I realized, he had already rallied the others for a search party.

| I will admit to some irritation that they did not think to ask me, but I will gladly inform them of what has transpired once they return.

Don't. |

Jason tapped his finger against the side of his phone, a smile slowly spreading across his face.

If Bruce is so determined to play detective, then let him |

Give me until noon tomorrow to find out what Dick wants to do. Hard to say if he'll find this funny or not. |

Personally, Jason hoped Dick was game for it, even though it would be annoying for a while. Jason was looking at even later nights spent pretending to look and ask around and Dick wouldn't be able to leave the apartment like he wanted, which would make it a hard sell after Jason's promise to help him re-learn his way around.

Yeah, he definitely needed to wait and see what Dick thought.

| Very well. I will speak with you tomorrow afternoon.

Jason put his phone back on the bedside table and let his thoughts run wild as he slowly drifted off to sleep once more.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Jason told Dick about his idea over breakfast, which turned out to be a bit of a mistake as Dick's mood soured along with his scent. He pushed his food around for a minute minutes before shoving the plate away and stomping off to the bedroom, where he locked the door.

Brain injuries can affect emotional responses, Jason reminded himself to keep his own frustration at bay. He would give Dick, as well as himself, time to calm down while he cleaned up and then try to revisit the conversation. Maybe it was time to suggest getting out of the city for a while? Would Dick be more receptive to that?

He scrubbed down a frying pan with more vigor than necessary, rinsed it, and set it aside to dry.

What if he was going about things all wrong? Keeping Bruce and the others in the dark to prove a point about asking first was something that would bring great amusement to Jason, but what did Dick gain from it?

Only another prison, smaller than the first.

“Ah, shit.” Jason turned off the sink and dried his hands. His phone was back in the bedroom, so if he wanted to talk to Alfred, he'd have to get Dick to open the door.

It'd been at least fifteen minutes, so Jason approached the bedroom and knocked. “Dick, I'm sorry. Look, forget that plan. It was stupid anyway. I was pretty annoyed at Tim when I thought it up. Can we... can we talk? Figure out what we want to do together?”

The lock clicked and Jason took a small step back so he wouldn't crowd Dick, an action that turned out to be unnecessary as Dick opened the door and stepped right into Jason's personal space, sliding his arms around his middle with a soft sigh. Dick was an impressive height for an Omega at just under six feet, which put him at the perfect height to rest his face against Jason's neck, his nose teasing against the scent gland there.

Jason swallowed. “Dickie?”

“M'sorry,” Dick apologized, his warm breath dancing across Jason's bare skin. “I don't think your plan is dumb. I don't know why I got so mad.”

“I just have that sort of face,” Jason tried to joke.

“Think you have a nice face,” Dick said thickly.

Well, that was... nice? Jason didn't get many compliments like that. It wasn't that he was particularly bad looking, but compared to Dick and the others? It was no contest.

“Uh, thanks?” Jason said, awkwardly patting Dick on the back. He had no idea what to do with his hands. Why was Dick still leaning against him? Dick had always been the tactile sort, but it seemed a bit much, even for him.

“Let's sit down and talk this through, okay?” Jason suggested.

The two spent the rest of the morning on the couch, going over the available options. Dick seemed fully against leaving Gotham for any extended period of time, so Jason dropped that idea after only bringing it up once. He was much more amiable to keeping things a secret from Bruce and the others on the second go-around and even excitably offered a solution to the problem of him then being stuck in the apartment. (“We could go out in disguise! It would be so much fun!”)

“Option three: Alfred tells them tonight over dinner,” Jason said. “Tim won't hesitate to give up my address, so we'll have to deal with all of them dropping by, but I'll kick them out if they try to force you to go back.”

Dick smiled – a genuine one that dimpled his cheeks. “You'd do that for me?”

“You came to me for help, so that's what I'm gonna do. Throwing people out of windows is just a bonus.”

“...that's a joke, right?”

“Nope. Next time Timmy shows up to harass me while I'm sleeping, he's getting tossed straight back out the window he came through. Maybe I'll give Babs a call before I do it, see if she can get it on video for posterity,” Jason said lightly. He was pretty sure she'd be on board with that so long as Tim suffered no real damage.

Dick's laughter was nervous, like he couldn't tell whether or not Jason was joking, but the mental image was too amusing not to react. “Is it wrong that I kind of like the idea of them not knowing, at least for a little while? It's just...” He paused to look around the cramped apartment. “It's peaceful here.”

“Final decision is all yours. You've got a while to think. Alfred'll call after lunch and we'll let him know then.”

Dick nodded. His brow furrowed as he continued to mull things over and he voiced a few more questions, like what they would do if Bruce reported him missing, and Jason did his best to answer. (Best case scenario, Alfred would find a way to talk Bruce out of it. Worst case, Jason would have to get ahead of him and report to someone – preferably Commissioner Gordon or one of his trusted people – that Dick was safe and staying with him. That would involve explaining why they hadn't told Bruce, but well... If it came down to it, Jason was sure he could figure out something that didn't sound completely crazy.)

“Let's do it,” Dick said, an excited gleam in his eyes. “We can give them a week to figure it out and after that...” He shrugged. “I guess we let Alfred tell them.”

“Or, we show up at dinner and act like nothing is wrong,” Jason suggested. “Could also get out of the city for a day or two. Go to the beach. Throw up some pictures of us on social media.”

“Start drama on purpose?” Dick asked uneasily.

“It's an option.”

Dick hesitated. Clearly he didn't find the idea as amusing as Jason did. (That was fine. Jason's sense of humor was a bit warped after the whole death-and-resurrection thing.)

“We could go after telling them?” Dick suggested instead.

While that would be far less amusing for Jason, it was still an appealing plan. It would at least get them away from Bruce long enough for things to cool down after the reveal, which would be better for everyone.

“Alright. Sounds like we have a plan.”

#JayDick #JayDickWeek2023 #Day 6: Omegaverse #Alpha Jason Todd #Omega Dick Grayson #my fanfic

[lynnhf]

Personal Writing Challenge(2 Weeks) Day 4

Date: 9/8/23

Title: Misconception

Universe: DC

Pairing: Dick Grayson/OC

Part 1?

She honestly couldn’t understand why she had to see superheroes on the news. All. The. Time. Like, seriously? Batman stopped the Joker from killing the Mayor! What else is new? Okay, so Robin stopped a robbery, what of it? Redhood killed a man?! Shocker. Red Robin was seen fleeing the scene! Is Wonder Woman and the Batman fucking each other?

Who knew he had a heart?

Ayla sighed, sinking further into her couch, watching as the news reporter once again, described how Nightwing, Bludhaven’s very own vigilante, saved the day. While also so very obviously thirsting over him and his, “incredible ass”. 

And, OH! That bod…

It was really, starting to get on her nerves. Where were the heroes without the cape? The Good Samaritan? Where were the people who pulled a lady out of the road before she got run over? Were there any of those people left in the world? 

Drumming her fingers against the leather, she sighed heavily before getting up and storming out her front door, keys, phone, and wallet in hand. She probably should have turned off her TV, but, eh. Who cares? If someone wanted to break into her apartment and steal something from her, what was she going to do to stop them? 

Movement came from her left and she looked out from the corner of her eye as she locked her door. Her neighbor, whom she had actually never met in person (having only seen him from a distance) was walking up the stairs. Talking enthusiastically to a young man, a late teen, a child, and…

Was that Bruce Wayne?

Shit. 

Turning towards the elevator (her right and her only escape) she paused in horror as she saw the “out of order” sign on the doors.

Double shit.

The only way out was to go through Bruce Wayne and her neighbor. Who she had been avoiding, in all honesty. She could practically feel them, him, coming closer to her and the door that was beside her. Making her decision, Ayla turned back to her door to unlock it, her mind fumbling with an excuse to use and-

“Hey! You're my neighbor, right?”

Damn. It.

She stopped turning the nob, forcing a smile as she turned back around. She was greeted with a brilliant smile and gorgeous eyes. She didn’t realize blue came in that color. Against her will, she felt her smile go from forced, “I don’t want to deal with you” to a soft, friendly, “I’ll gladly have a conversation with you!”. 

“Um, yeah uh, hi. I’m… your neighbor…” There was the social awkwardness, she was wondering when it’d show up.

While the child rolled his eyes, letting out a ‘tsk’ sound, the man in front of her seemed to perk up, brighten, even. He extended his hand, and exclaimed, “Hi, it’s nice to finally meet you! I’ve seen you around a lot but I can’t seem to catch you at a good time. My names Dick by the way.”

She looked at his hand a moment and hesitated. In quick succession, she glanced from his hand to his eyes and back again a few times before she practically peeled her hand off and away from the door nob. Like the idiot she was, she floundered with her hands before finally grasping his in a single handshake. Dick’s hand was warm, and to say it dwarfed hers would be an understatement. Blushing red, and looking down at the ground, she practically wheezed out a reply. 

“N-Nice to meet you… I’m, A-Ayla…” 

Instead of shaking her hand (like a normal person), Dick instead brought her hand up to his lips, kissing it lightly. Heart pounding, blush worsening, Ayla shot her head up and locked eyes with him. Part of her wanted to smack him, but the other part, the larger part, was swooning and she was pretty sure her legs abandoned her (traitors). What's worse, is that she was almost 100% certain she looked like a deer in the headlights. A red deer, Radlpoh in particular. But what was she going to do about that? 

Unbeknownst to her, her savior came from the young man behind him. He groaned, rolling his eyes as he pulled Dick away from her and (attempted) to shove him through the now open door. “Come on Romeo, we haven’t got all day. Flirt on your own time.”

Ayla watched with wide eyes as the teen, and fucking Bruce Wayne passed through the doorway, ignoring the scene she was now blessed with. The man with a tuff of white hair had Dick in hand, struggling to turn him towards the door. The child, who never lost his, “I’m better than you” arua, was also pushing (mostly shoving) Dick. Dick who never lost his smile as he was herded back and away from her. 

“If you ever need anything, knock! Or better yet, I’ll slip my number under your door!” 

With that, the door slammed shut behind them, his words echoing inside her head before disappearing into the abyss. She was left standing there, no real thought passing through her. She just stared blankly at where they used to be, failing to comprehend what she had just witnessed.

Eventually, she managed to walk pasted his door and start down the stairs. The scene rerunning in her head, only to give her a headache she didn’t have before. Stepping out onto the street, she couldn’t help but notice the shiny black limo. With what she was assuming to be the butler as he proceeded to clean one of the windows. The old man paused to look at her, nodded, and then returned to work. 

Feeling slightly creeped out by the weirdness of it all, Ayla turned and started her normal trek to work. A million thoughts seemed to run through her mind, but one stood out above all else.

What. Just. Happened. 

@batsyforyou

#The batman #batman #bruce wayne #dick grayson #Nightwing #Jason Todd #Redhood #Red Robin #Tim Drake #Damian Wayne #Robin #The Bat Fam #alfred pennyworth #Writing #Personal Writing Challenge #Writing Challenge #2 week writing challenge #Dick x OC #OC #Fem OC #LynnHF

[magical-girl-coral]

Catwoman stories that DC should write, part two:

*The armless master, Ted Grant and Alfred all fighting over who gets to walk Selina down the isle only breaking off when Selina tells the exciting news of her grandparents coming all the way from Cuba to see her away.

*An issue about a gossip reporter trying to catch the new it girl socialist Selina Kyle in a compromising position except it's always something stupid. He caught her on time sneaking off from a party with Harvey Dent and Bruce Wayne but it's so they argue somewhere quiet about ancient roman history. Another time she ran with famous singer Dinah Lance but it was to order pizza because either of them remembered to eat. The one time he gives up and doesn't bother chasing her, she went to a forgotten bathroom mid gala to dress up as Catwoman.

*Crossover story with Batman where they both find out Killer Croc escaped prison again and together they try to find him before anyone gets hurt. It's revealed in a flashback reveal Selina and Waylon met as young street rats trying to survive who had no one and vowed to watch the other's back since then. Even without using their sob story. Bruce is merciful with Waylon and is maybe the second person who has ever shown him compassion, even giving him a job offer as a chance for a new life. This could have been Selina's big "oh, Oh" moment if it weren't for her massive emotional constipation.

*Forming her own thievery group with the girls who were at her bachelorette party with a Maven cameo as Selina's assistant/the force of nature expert keeping Selina's civilian life together through detailed schedules and iron will.

*Selina visiting Ireland with Maggie to put their father's ashes to rest only to get bungled up in fae shenanigans against their will.

*Selina getting to be a mom without drama. That's it. That's the story. No one dies, lost in time, kidnapped by an evil origination or given up for adoption since DC are fucking allergic to allowing women of color to be decent mothers.

*A whole chapter dedicated to Selina's slow battling of her phobia of water to give courage to other readers who are fighting their own anxieties cause I doubt a young teen can walk off being nearly drowned to death without longtime consequences.

*Selina finding out a family member nearly got killed cause of gang violence and Catwoman tearing Gotham apart limb from limb until the message was sent across. People tend to forget her claws can cut through steel and many remember that lesson the hard way.

*Showcasing every job Selina had off screen while the rest of the cast tried to kill each other over what's good and evil such as: ancient linguistic expert, professional dancer of multiple genres, Hollywood actress, art gallery owner, veterinarian, book author of ancient myths retelling with actual research (she was sick and tired of all the tiktok takes), and a part singer for charity events.

*Having an on again off again team ups with the Riddler. On one hand, he is a somewhat decent friend who's great with gadgets and a ruthless gossip, but the other hand he just does not stop dropping clues of their crimes and is always too lax with their getaway plans and god damn it Eddie, it's like you're trying to get us caught!

*Tragic friendship that could have been romance turned enemies between Pammy and Selina before either of them dawned their costumes. Selina donating a large sum of money she "gathered" over the weeks to the firm Pammy worked at because they were one of the few that didn't test their products on animals. Sweet shy Pammy saw Selina with walk in with confidence and beauty of a goddess and nearly tripped over herself when Selina asked for her opinion on a matter she couldn't even hear them talk about. They became friends afterwards, and Selina would regularly come back for talks and advice about poisons that seem shady but Pammy was too in love fascinated by the subject to question her motives.

*A pre street kid story where it shows Selina having a happy home life with her parents and little sister before it was all taken away from her. If Batman can have a hundred versions of his parents murder, Selina can have variation where her family didn't suck.

*Selina going through a crisis when she hit twenty and decided to take a bisexual gap year to travel the world where she gained Bast's favour in Egypt, accidentally seduced a moon deity in hiding, had a summer romance with Talia in Singapore, gained Shiva's attention by mastering sword dancing in China, put an angry one thousand year old spirit to rest by returning her precious hairpin and gaining more divine favors and returning to Gotham to get hammered on her 21th birthday.

#honestly this is just turning into a list of fanfic prompts im too burnout to write #and yes i know ted and selina had a r*mantic relationship but thinking about it makes me want to hurl so i just veto it #DC #DC Comics #Selina Kyle #BatCat #PoisonCat #CatFam

[bonzai-bunny]

New Chapter!

Rating: T

Fandom: DCU, Batman

Warnings: Teen!Bruce flirting with other batfam members (he is rejected), underage drinking

Characters: Bruce Wayne, Duke Thomas, Dick Grayson, Zatanna Zatara

Relationships: None

Chapter Summary: Bruce falls off the roof.

Excerpt:

Dick knew he had to take control of the situation and lead, but part of him wished he had someone else to shoulder the burden, not for the first time. For some reason leading the Titans never put this amount of pressure on his shoulders. Bruce had been de-aged and Alfred was gone so Dick was in charge. Again. At least Bruce was here this time and Dick wasn’t also drowning in grief. Zatanna was going to fix this, he just knew she was, so all Dick had to do was wait.

Jason was no help. He basically said Glad I’m not you, bro and fucked off, despite Dick’s plea for help.

He meant to get to the cave sooner, but kept getting held up putting out all the small fires (and one literal fire) in Gotham. About an hour after he left, he had a break so he checked in with Signal.

“Signal, status report. How’s Bruce?”

There was a pause and then a voice that wasn’t Signal’s said, “I’m fine, just a little bruised,” and Dick frowned. Bruce was awake which was good (?) news but why was he answering? What had happened?

“He woke up and figured out he’s in the future. Sorry,” Signal apologized. Dick shouldn’t have underestimated Bruce’s ability to figure things out and was kicking himself for not coming up with a better solution. He sighed.

“What’s done is done. The plan remains the same. I’ll be there soon. ETA ten minutes.”

#bonzai's bullshit #my fic #Bruce Wayne #Dick Grayson #Duke Thomas #dc #batman