#again i'm not here to say who does and doesn't have adhd i don't know that. but i do know its traits and i want to call them what they are | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mysticheathenn · 3 months

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Why Are You Ugly? Your Traits, Habits, Etc...

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card is really just for fun. Please don't take most of what is here seriously unless it resonates. This is just to show some of your features or traits that others deem unattractive. Again this is meant to be fun and not a dig at you..unless you like shit like that then by all means do you.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek professional help.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

Pile l:

Tarot: 5 of Swords, 5 of Cups / Strength (reversed), 2 of Swords

Pile l others find you "ugly" because you are a coward who lack direction in their life. The phrase from the movie Clueless "You're a virgin who can't drive" just popped into my head. Not only that but you like to cry wolf while also not doing anything with your life. Ex. "I'm so lazy, a fatass, etc" but then you continue to scroll on TikTok and not apply yourself in areas of your life you want to change. You may also like to point fingers at other people whenever something doesn't happen the way you want it to go and blame everyone else except for the matter for what it is, sometimes yourself.

Oracle: Talent/Dreams (Reversed), Life Purpose The TikTok meme "You are looking so cute doing ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING GET YOUR ASS UP. GET YOUR ASS UP." For those who don't know the meme here is the link to the original video: http://tinyurl.com/3fa4xth2

Pile ll:

Tarot: 3 of Swords / The Magician / 6 of Swords (All Reversed), 5 of Pentacles.

The only thing you like to let go of is money pile ll. Anything else in your life you like to hold onto especially toxic people and grudges and sometimes for no dam reason. Someone could step on your 5-year-old shoes and say sorry but because they stepped on your shoe you're out for revenge...okay maybe some of you may not be that petty but you still like to hold grudges and then wonder why no one or barely anyone is in your life...it's because you let people go for breathing wrong pile ll. Someone says your name in a tone you aren't familiar with, blocked. Someone didn't bring you food even though you said you weren't hungry, block. Again maybe not this crazy for some of you but you get it. You may have also been attracted a bit to pile one because you also don't like to do sh*t with your life and when you do decide to do sh*t with your life if it doesn't happen fast enough for you, you give up as if everything is supposed to bend you to your will when, where, and how you want it.

Oracle: Prosperity/Love (reversed), Trust

There's a lyric to a song that I can't think of but the song part that is playing in my head is "That's why you believe in lies..."...I wish I knew the song but that is the only part of it that keeps playing with no melody in my head. Learn to trust...not only yourself but others and love yourself. Let love in your life without treating everything like a checklist or transaction. Also, stop overspending, pick up a Financial literacy book or course and learn how to save, plan, and budget your money properly.

Pile lll:

Tarot: Death, 8 of Wands, The Fool, Knight of Wands

Pile lll your trait that others may deem "ugly/unappealing" isn't so much of a bad thing. you were probably told when you were younger that you always were "Acting fast" or if not people as an adult tell you all the time that you are always on the move as if you are on the run. You can't sit still maybe you have or deal with ADHD. Every time you get a new idea, or opportunity, or you see something that could possibly get you ahead in life you are on it and you never think about whether this is the right move for you? Is this opportunity legit? or anything else substantial that you need to make sure that you land safely, if not safely at least have a parachute when you jump. You may also move from job to job similar to pile ll anytime you see even a milligram of bullsh*t you are out of there. "Miller when you are done running and want to make a home, make it with me." Book Quote from the book Caught Up by Liz Tomforde (love that book) it's about a female who is always on the run and she does a favor for her dad and nanny one of his teammate's son and when they start falling for each other he says that to her. I am getting this is more so from your higher self pile lll. When you are done running from your past, inner thoughts, poverty, chasing gimmicks, and temporary people go back to yourself and actually see what exactly do you want to do, what is your purpose, what is something you can build for your life that is stable and secure than these fleeting moments you keep trying to create for yourself. Some of you may be either in situationships that you hate or like to have a lot of flings only to feel lonely afterward.

Oracle: Boundaries, Life Purpose, Compassion

This goes back to the quote in your reading pile lll. Stop running from yourself and the things you really want vs the things you chase.... I may do a reading on this let me know if you want that or not. Either way show yourself more compassion and place boundaries on yourself not others. You have no problem in that department for a lot of you but others you need boundaries for yourself and others.

REMEMBER THIS IS MEANT TO BE A FUN READING AND NOT AN ATTACK.

Thank you to everyone who are subscribed to my Patreon and those who like and reblog my pick-a-card readings. I always appreciate you. I hope you enjoyed this reading.

Until next time, stay safe and blessed.

#tarotcommunity #tarotblr #pick a card #tarot cards #witchblr #pac tarot #pick a pile #pac reading #tarot reading #pick a photo #pick a picture

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aurae-rori · 28 days

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DR RATIO ANALYSIS: PART 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

SPOILERS FOR 2.1 CONTENT.

Now, you might be saying - "Aurae, you already did one, why do you need a second?" And my answer is, "LORD, I FORGOT TO TALK ABOUT HOW HIS DEFINITION OF 'IDIOT' IS DIFFERENT. AND ALSO HE DOES NOT HATE AVENTURINE NOR DOES HE THINK AVENTURINE IS STUPID." Once again, here is my disclaimer - although I have been researching psychology for a solid six years, I am NOT a professional. (I will be, one day. Just you wait, just youuuu wait-) So understand that everything I say has been analyzed with personal judgement, with my own conclusions, come to with logic and my personal interpretation. This is just what I have concluded, and you are always free to disagree.

This is my legacy. To be an analyzer. So let's go.

Okay, now that my disclaimer is over, let's take off Ratio's plaster head and chuck it into the sea, and see - what does he mean by 'idiot'?

This will be much shorter than my last, so don't worry - I will not be flashbanging you with another 4k words. This is more like a follow up, than anything else, because there's a few things I wish to touch on.

Dr. Ratio doesn't hate idiots in the sense that he hates people that have 'low IQ' or are 'stupid' in terms of being 'slow to understand'. I definitely touched on this in my last analysis, but he hates people who take their education for granted and don't go places with the gifts that they've been given. He hates "idiots" - "narrow minded" people who have the capabilities to do more and perceive more than they choose to do. People who deliberately look away or take what they know and what they could do for granted. He wants to open people's eyes and allow them to see life from multiple different angles and he believes that everyone should have a chance to learn - with the whole "knowledge for everyone" thing he's got rolling.

He wears a plaster head around people he doesn't seem to know too well in order to think more, or so that he doesn't have to see the faces of the people he dislikes. Pretty good roast. However, he does NOT wear that plaster head around Aventurine. Let's listen to the doctor's judgement - Aventurine is far from stupid. Although he likes to chalk up a lot of the things he does to his own luck, he is an INCREDIBLY capable individual who's managed to get this far because of his own form of genius. He's a man who relies on chance and good fortune, yes, but his charm, his way of scheming, and the way that he's good with people? That's skill. A talent he doesn't take for granted. Dr. Ratio respects him for this - because despite the fact that he has no proper education, he has his eyes wide open to the world and doesn't take shit for granted. He learns what he can in order to survive and he does it fucking well - Aventurine is a very smart man. He's observant, quick on his feet, and great at going with the flow and thinking in the moment.

Aventio aside, I actually believe that Dr. Ratio would be a really good teacher to those who struggle. He's patient where it's needed to be, even if he's got a quick temper, and I believe in his pursuit for knowledge he would do his best to go out of his way to find strategies that would work for their individuals. We're all unique, and he's aware of this - and because he wants to allow people to think for themselves, whatever helps the individual works. Depression? He's got a psych degree, I'm sure bro could give you some strategies. Autism? He has a touch of the 'tism himself. ADHD, and not feeling organized? Bro will help you. It's canon that he's a great fucking teacher - those who finish his classes go on to become successful people who are intelligent and critical thinkers. Round of applause for Ratio, the man that kins my father. He's shit at emotions, but great at knowledge.

Also, on that note, I believe that he would most likely hate parents that push thier "gifted" students to the limit without any compassion for the person that they really are. He's most definitely got some of that academic trauma so I believe that bro holds a secret disdain for parents who just use their children to gain more recgonition. Well, not so secret. He'd cuss them out. (Ratio please cuss out the horrible parents.)

Dr. Ratio, the Teacher ever. (Hey, maybe he'd get along with Kunikida...)

Also, I am definitely planning on making a fic where he teaches Aventurine Latin. As long as you're eager to learn and willing to look past the chalk being thrown, he's got a place for you.

Thanks for coming to my tedtalk. I did not read this through, so this is not edited. Take my unedited rambles.

#aurae analyzes #dr ratio #drratio #veritas ratio #analysis #character analysis #honkai star rail #hsr #aventio #ratiorine #aventurine #dr ratio x aventurine #character study

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dropthedemiurge · 3 months

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Love for Love's Sake | Things You Didn't Notice #6

Translations and comments for Episode 6 (I have ADHD don't come after me, I was too invested that I bingewatched episodes yesterday and now I need to rewatch the 3 and 4 to make thorough comments on the dialogues). I was prompted by @lurkingshan to pay more attention to the movie posters :D Please let me know your thoughts after!

At first, I wanted to say that the movie titles were translated (at least, in my version of subs) and there was nothing behind them beside obvious but I decided to research more and indeed found somewhat interesting things! (the post will be long so I'll pile screenshots together)

First thing we see – Myungha has agonizing thoughts about "I can't believe I am on a date with a guy (when I'm supposed to be just an NPC/Player in this game)" next to the movie poster with an interesting title "The Guy Who Will Give a Kiss for 10 000 won"

This movie doesn't exist :D However! The title and poster style is clearly based on the old manhwa from ~2006 that's called "The Guy Who Will Give a Kiss for 5 000 won" (lmao they doubled MC's price that's inflation for you).

The note at the bottom says "Top Secret Disclosure: Kissing Method" aka MC is the guy who promises to teach you how to kiss if you give him some money, and the same note is shown in the LFLS poster. I thought the guy on the poster looked similar to Myungha but I think they actually got Taevin (the actor) to pose for this fake poster xD

Which leads me to the first thought that these posters were born out of Myungha's imagination – come on, we just got the scene between him and Yeowoon where they kissed for the first time and Yeowoon asked Myungha to give him time to practice and improve kissing (Myungha with his slightly better experience probably feels like a mentor with some "shady" intentions who eventually falls in love xD) Coincidence? I don't think so.

The second poster on the wall is also about a non-existent movie but before diving into that, here's how Yeowoon comes into the picture.

Two things: "Wonderful Ghost" huge poster on the wall behind him and the caption on the wall next to him.

In case you haven't paid attention, it says "If you come at four in the afternoon, I'll begin to be happy by three," which is a popular romantic phrase that definitely reflects Yeowoon's feelings atm, aww.

Meanwhile, Wonderful Ghost movie (also called as "The SOUL-mate") actually exists! But it's not new, it was released in 2018 and the story is about a guy done with his life after tragic events who becomes haunted by an energetic ghost that changes his life and mindset. (I did phrase this summary deliberately non-specific to make you feel another connection to the current story of LFLS.)

The caption on the poster also says, literally translated, "Let's do it together until the end of the world". This movie has other poster versions with other captions as Google shows but this is the version shown in Love for Love's Sake. Actually, while we're on the topic – I have no idea where "Love for Love's Sake" title came from, does anyone know? Someone in my previous posts speculated about the story based on this title but the Korean title of this series is "연애 지상주의 구역" ("Dating Supremacy Zone", or just "Dating Zone") which is the term that comes up in alert whenever Myungha is close to Yeowoon.

Anyway, back to our zombies, gorillas and demons. The movie Myungha and Yeowoon actually went to watch on their date was "Zombie Gorilla VS Demon Crocodile". The caption on thte poster says "Who will protect the world?"

Again, this movie doesn't exist. Why would they make such a point of showing Myungha crying and experiencing genuine emotions (when he only shed tears after he got scared by the full-scale system error and when his grandma got into hospital)? Well, Myungha explains it to Yewoon by himself.

"Well, it was the first time I see someone crying for a zombie gorilla." "Do you know how epic this movie is? The crocodile was actually an extraterrestrial. He met the gorilla here and joined him to save the world." "The plot is really strange." "It was very emotional."

Does it ring a bell? I don't think I need to add any words. Myungha = someone who came from another world and joined Yeowoon to save him and complete the game with happy ending. Myungha relates a lot and cries. I just find it funny thinking about how "The plot is really strange" and "You have a very strange taste" can be also said to all the viewers of LFLS (well, we all are very invested in this a bit confusing mysterious story as well, aren't we?xD)

I also love how we keep being reminded about the "unreality" of the story, how system can experience bugs and things in the world can glitch and Myungha is never immersed in this new life or his new love story to the 100% (cue all the 'choose anyone but me, go date a better man' and patronizing way he treats all characters around him, instead focusing on preventing them and the world from bad events following author's instructions)

I don't think I have much to add to the rest of the episode, I mirrored the haters articles and messages which were written for the show but the comments are quite generic (I couldn't read all of them but I didn't notice anything unusual). One thing, the DM to Myungha technically says "Die, Tae Myungha".

All I can say is that the online anonymous bullying is really prominent and a huge problem in Korea that leads to celebrities' depression and sometimes suicide. All influencers (and there are a lot of them in SK) are held to unimaginable 'perfect' standard and forums often have anonymous commenting which makes messages even more cruel (but later they addressed the issue and I think at least under news articles in Entertainment/Celebrity section the anonymous function was turned off, still, there are a lot of ways to ruin someone's life online). It happens in every country, of course, but stalking/online bullying is something that can be understood very easily by Koreans because it's often on the news and in the community.

Another little detail – even though Myungha does talk to students who are technically "younger" than him by one school year like he's old and wise, he doesn't use the word 'kid' nearly as much as you'd think xD (but the subs are doing the right thing anyway because how else are you supposed to show that subtle cultural difference between saying Cha Yeowoon and Yeowoon-ah, or Myungha calling Sangwoon by his name when he's frustrated with him instead of cursewords or titles?)

In the phrase "Get it together, kid!" Myungha actually uses the word 새끼 (saekki) which can be a curseword (like 'asshole, bastard', used by school gangster in previous eps) but it also literally means 'a child' that can be used by grandparents for their grandson or by parents, for example. So basically, think of 'son of a bitch' which can be used both as cursing and have literal meaning. Koreans have the same (개새끼 - son of a dog) phrase.

But it doesn't have an affectionate connotation when said by teenagers or adults (unless it's said to close friends without heat), and I am sure Myungha says it with more of "Get it together, you brat!" meaning. I just used this screenshot to tell you about Korean cursewords, he-he.

+ bonus: there is no translation or anything, but since we were talking about posters, I just found it funny and adorable how Yeowoon visually replaced here the poster behind him xD

#love for love's sake #love supremacy zone #love for love's sake comments #love for love's sake meta #dropthemeta #bl meta #kbl #korean bl #korean language #korean drama #language #kdrama

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tabithatwo · 1 year

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it's yellowjackets / jennifer's body parallels time!

hi hello keep reading if you would like to hear about shauna/jennifer and jackie/needy, here's my totally noncomprehensive, very much off the cuff thoughts on this very complex and interesting dynamic!!

(i'm not getting into the basic parallels, i'm gonna assume you know the karyn kusama of it all, the heart necklace, the homoerotic female friendship, the death)

yellowjackets is so brilliant because it feeds you stereotypes and absolutely does not deliver on them. there could be an entire paper on each girl and how this is true for them specifically, but walk quickly with me because i want to get into the nitty gritty gory fun stuff! a brief oversimplified example: nat is referred to as a burnout, some would assume she's a loner based on that, but she cares about the team as a unit more than arguably anyone else. (this is common in real life too, our stereotypes often don't hold water in reality and yj reflects that beautifully!)

now to the jackie/shauna of it all. it would be oh so incredibly easy to look at jackie and think she's the jennifer of the duo. we are set up to see her as prettier, more popular, more demanding. but that illusion falls apart QUICKLY if you pay attention to the things that jackie actually says and does. she's not a mean girl. she's actually one of the kindest on the team. she doesn't pick on shauna, she clings. there are plenty of takes on this on tumblr so i won't exhaust it, my adhd loves to digress and meander but i'm forcing myself back onto the trodden path to this point: people look at the first few minutes of the pilot and they immediately decide that they know who these girls are. the audience typecasts jackie as a jennifer and shauna as a needy. the popular, bubbly girl and her shy, bookworm best friend.

a lot of people, especially casual viewers who don't study this show like its their job (god, wonder what that would be like lol) understandably stop here. but to me the BRILLIANCE of yj is that they don't actually make it HARD for you to undo your initial impressions. the material is there. it isn't hidden. it isn't some deeper self of each character that is unraveled throughout seasons. they push, push, push to see just how far they can carry our deeply held stereotypes/expectations. how forward and violent can shauna be, with viewers still clinging to a shy and sweet girl, who was really their own creation? how kind and honestly pathetic kicked-puppy can jackie be, with viewers still clinging to a mean girl, who was really their own creation? how far will we go to warp the characters intentions, so that we can keep them in the box we understand them in? they ask this of the viewer and of other characters, but AGAIN i digress.

so, while this might sit strangely with some, yes i think that jackie is very much aligned with needy if you peel back just one layer. but far above and beyond that, shauna is so very fucking jennifer.

the overall veneer is thinned immediately in yj. there isn't one girl in the stands and one on center stage. jackie and shauna are both on the team. they go to the same parties, they play the same sport, i would argue that shauna isn't even coded as "less pretty" (please note the word coded, because i'm not saying needy is literally less pretty than jennifer, i am simply saying that we have hair, makeup, clothing, glasses trends that we use to stereotype characters, are you with me?)

so now what? now these girls are both and neither. shauna thinks that she is the needy to jackie's jennifer. jackie wears the necklace and the introductory shots frame her as important. but we're already diverting from that set-up.

our absolute clearest common denominator here is one that i rarely see people mention funnily enough: JENNIFER IS A SUCCUBUS. she CONSUMES. she KILLS. she WANTS and she TAKES.

now before you get TOO EXCITED!!! i see some of you getting ready to say i'm a shauna shipman hater, put the pitchforks down!! shauna is one of my favorite characters of all time. i love her crazy ass so deeply that it's alarming. (i don't hate jennifer, either, for the record.) i love her largely for WHAT she is. i think sanitizing or sweetening her is a disservice. she's amazing and complex and wounded and capable of deep love. but she also, quite LITERALLY, consumes.

her character is sex and desire and violence and obsession and consumption. and it's AMAZING. she's POWERFUL. she's our main framing character (in this dynamic), rather than needy. the scripts are switched. jennifer dies and needy lives, and that's one story. that's clearer cut, simpler, made for a horror film. but here, jackie dies and shauna lives, and that story is deep and rich and goes on to include a whole lot more death and destruction and chaos.

shauna tells us herself that it excites her. she likes it. she is this girl. this woman. she reminisces and she recreates and she covets.

jennifer tries to consume needy, shauna literally consumes jackie.

there's more to this story, obviously. you could deep dive and mine for the intricacies of the set up and fall of stereotype and expectation, or collect all of the exact parallels. but i'll stick with a few, because this is a quick outburst of thought.

a huge one, who is taking whose boyfriend?

here's another personal favorite of mine, just for kicks

is it too complex to neatly tuck away? absolutely. they're different stories with different themes. shauna isn't simply a teenager possessed by a demon. it runs far deeper. as is the essence of this show.

but if you want to look at parallels, look at the one who has been holding the knife the whole time.

#can you tell both of these stories make me crazy #i love shauna this is not shauna hate this is shauna LOVE do not misinterpret pls #you guys she EATS people!!#anon who just messaged me about this YES I see you I’m with you here are my thoughts lol #yellowjackets #yellowjackets meta #jennifer's body #shauna shipman #jennifer check #jackie taylor #anita needy lesnicki #karyn kusama #shauna x jackie #jackie x shauna #jackieshauna #shaunajackie

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overdramaticpanromantic · 2 months

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why do people think endogenic systems aren't real?

disclaimer: i am not a system nor am i part of one, and i am not able to speak for those who are. this is an opinion, and i would like constructive feedback on said opinion. i do not want hate mail or people screaming at me, i have had enough of that this week.

i do not get why people think endogenic systems aren't real. the argument i see most is that if it's not based on trauma (i.e. traumagenic) then it's not real, but i disagree.

firstly, many mental conditions can arise from non-traumatic experiences, and trauma is not a necessary catalyst for these things. i'm autistic, though i can't speak for others (because my support needs are very low) as a result of how i was raised, but not in a traumatic way. i've asked around a bit about this, and it seems that part can be agreed upon, in that mental conditions do not have to result from trauma.

secondly, i have not noticed any differences, aside from trauma or lack thereof, when speaking to those who are a system or part of a system. i cannot know what is going on in other people's heads, but i can look at how people generally act, and i do not notice any difference, though the sample size is low (about 5) so this could be coincidence. i might ask in passing conversation, "how does being a system work?" out of curiosity. they explain, and the explanations from traumagenic and endogenic systems, or members of said systems, are fairly uniform and don't seem to contrast very much, aside from individual mannerisms such as how it may present itself, which is bound to be subjective for any mental condition.

thirdly, i don't like the logic the argument as a whole operates on. if non-traumagenic systems aren't real, isn't that similar to the argument wherein people say non-dysphoric trans people aren't real, or that self-diagnosed neurodivergencies (e.g. autism, adhd, bpd, tourette's, dyslexia, and others as well, but i can't list a ton of them off the top of my head) aren't real. this is medical essentialist, or medicalist, logic, and it doesn't hold up very well under pressure. it frequently takes the form of when someone doesn't want to acknowledge that not everyone is like them, and most commonly presents itself in those who are bigoted in other ways, such as racism.

fourthly, when conversing about it, the reactions i get from either type of person are very different (sample size of about 40 here, so again, it's not entirely conclusive) if i ask someone who's anti-endogenic about it (what the point of the argument is, for instance), i am met with hostility and yelling, whilst if i ask someone who is pro-endogenic about it, i am met with straightforward explanations and my questions being answered. ultimately, it isn't one's duty to answer questions for others, but if one side of a debate refuses to answer questions and another is able to answer questions, then typically, the side refusing to answer questions is wrong. for example, flat-earthers will refuse to argue a lot of the time, and other times, they will mention various buzzphrases such as "water finds its level," and "density and buoyancy," which is a phenomenon i have noticed coming from some (but few) anti-endogenics.

that's what i've gathered from my observations, and i wanted to share this for the reason that i want to understand more, and particularly why some people think the things they do - in that they don't believe a particular group of people exists. to cap it off, i'll attach a poll below, asking what people think regarding this.

if you want to help the poll get more entries, then you can reblog this post or share it with friends. thank you for reading!

#endogenic #traumagenic #did #looking for answers #syscourse

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thirteenemeraldcats · 3 months

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in one of your tags you mentioned-

'one of the things that gets chatted about A LOT in teaching is meeting students at their point of need- which ted does NOT do with jamie'

I would love to hear more of your thoughts on this! Both in terms of what that concept entails, and also what you think Jamie's point of need was at the time versus what Ted saw the situation needing

(You have excellent tags btw, don't know if anyone's mentioned that)

I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS ON THIS THAT I LOVE THAT YOU'D LOVE TO HEAR!

(I have more thoughts than I anticipated, this got errr, long. Whoops)

(potentially necessary/relevant background here is I am a high school teacher 👋)

Okie dokie, so, one of the principles of best practice in teaching is the idea I tag-rambled above; meet both the individual students and collective class at their point of need. Essentially this means practising differentiation in teaching and adjusting how content/ideas are communicated to students based on who they are as learners and people. Particularly if a student is performing outside the 'average' (either exceeding or still developing), this means adjusting to their needs by (among other things) curating differentiated resources and adapting delivery style. Differentiation is especially important in an all-abilities classroom, unfortunately public education is perpetually underfunded and overcrowded so everyone's just out here doing their best (the decent people of the world at least). BUT! WHILE I'M ON IT! SPEAKING OF THE THINGS I'VE TAG RAMBLED, the education system's (global) inability to adequately differentiate for students of different-abilities, particularly students with ADHD, ASD and Dyslexia, is perhaps the greatest failing of the whole dang thing and if anyone who ever stumbles across this is neuro-divergent and feels like they were a bad student or couldn't 'keep up' in mainstream education- THAT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. You don't have to break yourself to 'fit', school is MEANT to bend for you. (Particularly when you're young, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE YOUNG)

ANYWAY, the fictional football of it all!

We don't see a lot of Ted actually coaching in this show (stick with me). The scenes in which he 'coaches' are typically him and various other coaching staff standing on the sidelines while the team skirmishes or occasionally runs drills, so me saying Ted doesn't differentiate is more based around his patented Ted-talks. NOW, Ted PROBABLY knows the team fairly well as individuals, particularly in season 2 and 3, purely by having spent quite a lot of time with them, despite this the only times we really see him 'adjust' his style with the team are ironically season 1 (examples include conferencing Jamie and Roy in 1x04 For The Children, and allowing/facilitating Nate's speech in 1x07 Make Rebecca Great Again). The moment that always sticks out to me as most significant is when he goes and seeks out Keeley's advice on how to get through to Jamie in 1x02 Biscuits.

Side note: I will be forever obsessed with Keeley jumping straight from 'blowjobs' to one of the four operant conditioning techniques (positive reinforcement) when asked about this. That woman is a very fascinating puzzle of a person.

Ted recognises that his typical perpetual-optimism-style isn't cracking the Jamie-Tartt-nut and seeks out a different opinion. This kind of collaboration and whole-system approach is key in teaching too, either by tapping the knowledge-well of a student's broader school context or the difficult-to-crack student's parents.

SO, having gotten the Jamie-Tartt-cheat-code from Keeley he DOES meet Jamie at his point of need, speaks clearly to him and communicates what he needs from him. AND IT WORKS! Temporarily! During the conversation between the two in Ted's office we see Jamie engage, he even practises self-reflection! Granted it's about his left foot cross, but still! The nut is cracked.

Jamie even maintains the perspective Ted has taught him for about two seconds while talking to Trent, until Jamie's other (definitely not positively-reinforced) behaviours rear up and he reverts to what James others have taught him.

On the other hand.

Multiple times throughout the show we see Jamie be visibly or verbally confused by Ted's communication style. Ted often talks in meandering metaphors that Jamie doesn't seem to be able to follow. We verbally hear him state 'Why doesn't he just say that then, do you know what I mean?' in 2x07 Headspace after Beard has to translate Ted's 'peas and carrots/beefchunks' analogy to 'starters and reserves'. Then there's the infamous 'What the fuck are Denver Broncos?' from 3x09 La Locker Room Aux Folles. The only notable time we really see Jamie 'get' one of these metaphors is the sewer-system-tunnels from 3x01 Smells Like Mean Spirit.

(His understanding of that specific metaphor, along with his use of the magnets to demonstrate total football in 3x07 The Strings That Bind, and a Watsonian-perspective of his near perfect mimicry of movements he saw two years ago when executing the decoy play in 3x12 So Long, Farewell, are actually all examples I use to head-canon Jamie as a primarily visual/physical based learner. For whatever that's worth!)

NOW! Ted's willingness to seek and apply alternate techniques in season 1 when he should know the team as both individuals and a collective the least, coupled with his inability or unwillingness to practise differentiation in later seasons when he DOES KNOW THEM is why I don't think Ted is meeting the team, specifically Jamie at their/his point of need. Any person's ability to differentiate behaviour to meet the needs/requirements/comforts of the individual or group they're talking to is increased the more they know them. (We all do this in life, consciously or subconsciously we typically try and 'match the vibe' of whoever we're communicating with [doubly so for people who're engaging in masking.])

Ted should and does learn more about Jamie as a person and his background as the show progresses. He listens to Jamie vocalise both his internal justifications for his actions and his reflections of those justifications/actions in 1x06 Two Aces, he sees him being explicitly physically abused in 1x10 The Hope That Kills You, he listens to him describe a spiralling mindset in 2x02 Lavender, he sees him being explicitly verbally abused in 2x08 Man City.

Of course, one of the fascinating things about Jamie is how much he learns and grows over the course of the show, and there are instances in which I don't think Ted is recognising that (primarily his dismissal of Jamie in 3x03 4-5-1 and not utilising Jamie's knowledge of total football as a resource from the beginning in 3x07 The Strings That Bind).

Ted understands and has previously applied Jamie responding well to positive reinforcement, yet at multiple times in the series doesn't respond in a way that reflects his perspective being informed by that knowledge. Essentially not practising the appropriate level of care/caution when interacting with/around Jamie.

There's not intervening on Jamie's behalf in 2x03 Do the Right-est Thing or 2x06 The Signal when the team and Roy are targeting or ignoring him respectively. The assumed absence of any follow up to the events of 2x08 Man City, the Zava of it all in season 3, and of course the eternal 'forgiveness' kicker from 3x11 Mom City.

POINT BEING. And to actually answer your inquiry lol, I think Jamie is someone who needs clear communication, ideally bracketed in positive reinforcement based operant conditioning as a learning technique (reward behaviour you want reinforced by offering something desirable [praise in Jamie's case]) and visual/physical aid/references for concepts; as a LEARNER.

AS A PERSON, there's more. Ted can readily infer from all he's heard and seen that Jamie's a victim of child abuse. The long term damage to the adult psyche that abuse during formative years has is astronomical, it literally changes the foundational structures of a person's brain. And yet, again, we never see Ted even acknowledge this. Jamie in 3x11 Mom City, incidentally compares his father to Freddy Krueger, Ted elaborates on the comparison, then Jamie reiterates that Freddy Krueger's 'fucking terrifying'. Ted doesn't reassure Jamie (the requirement of his point of need), he gives him a Ted-talk (and in doing so doesn't differentiate his perspective/communication technique).

As far as what Ted thought the situation needed... search me I've got no idea. I do think Ted projects onto Jamie a hell of a lot. That he gets Jamie's personhood and life experiences all tangled up in the emotions he has about his father's death and his consequent perceived abandonment, his insecurities about his own ability to parent Henry and even in his own inability to clearly communicate with his mother. I do think Ted relies on his own forced optimism to 'get by'. Like how a great white shark dies if it stops swimming, if Ted stops being 'Ted', if he stops swimming, his past and his fears and his feelings will catch up to him and swallow him whole. (For what it's worth, I do think Ted is more unwell than even the show explicitly tells us, much like Jamie experiencing ongoing trauma due to childhood abuse, the effects both short-term and long-term as well as potential causalities of having a parent die by suicide are... grim.)

(Essentially the entire fandom has talked about basically all of this at one point or another, I'm just using slightly different language.)

NOW! These characters are fictional (obviously) and I am judging them based on real-people conventions and the best-principles of my own profession, as well as my background in theoretical psychology (which I think I forgot to mention and is also probably [??] relevant). My Doylist-perspective of Ted and his coaching/communication style is ...kinder, but if I get too sucked into the narrative it results in either brief tag-rambles or... whatever this thing I've just typed is. I think it's been too long since I've written academically, my thoughts have gone circular 🫠

ANYWAY! I hope this made something-approaching sense! Thank you again for asking to hear my thoughts! Always happy to word vomit!

ALSO, thank you for saying my tags are excellent (you are the first and currently only to say so!) - The tags are where I send my thoughts to die (in a 'I must banish them to move on' kind of way rather than a 'I'm strangling them' kind of way) so you saying they're excellent is even MORE flattering than you realise! Makes my brain want to purr 💚🤣

#what do i even begin to tag this slab of text as YEESH #ted lasso #jamie tartt #theodore lasso #ask box is always open #come hit me up for teaching rambles or psych rambles or fandom rambles or general rambles ANYTIME #readwing #jamiesfootball #oh shit trigger warnings #suicide #child abuse #if this indeed makes no sense i would like to blame it on the fact i've written it while drinking wine through a straw #(it's my friday night okay)#i'll post this in the morning when i've had the chance to read it while NOT drinking wine through a straw #hola- it is now morning and i'm only slightly hungover! win!

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freesia-writes · 6 months

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Lil Life Update for Y'all <3

I've been a lil cryptic or back-n-forth, I think, and just wanted to share a little bit about what's been going on. I say it's not for attention but who knows what motives lurk under there, LOL. It's mostly because I love you all and want to let you in, also hope that it's encouraging or connective for anyone else who's experienced the same, and also I just miss the community I have sooooo loved here. 🥹

I'm a 34yo female with 2 kids aged 4 and 7. I had depression like crazy during and after my second pregnancy especially. In Aug 2021, my primary doc suggested I try something like Zoloft since I'd been complaining of irritability, no capacity, constant worry, and other anxiety symptoms. When I did feel some relief and felt encouraged that I could "feel like myself" again, I pursued solutions for other issues I was noticing. Over the last year and a half, it's been quite a ride. ADHD symptoms led to Adderall for 4 days, then Wellbutrin for a few months, then Buspar for a few months, then Strattera (tapering up and then back down) for about 3 months, then Ritalin for 1 month, which I thought was helping until we realized that the entire month of October was basically an increasingly manic episode.

Whew.

We're talkin 2007 Britney here (ok I didn't shave it but I cut my hair off into a pixie). Spent thousands on a new wardrobe of the "dark academia" style. Bought Disneyland tickets. Invested in a photography mentorship. So much energy and inspiration. Then we realized it was getting out of hand.

I had also been tapering off a lot of the meds over the last two months, so it was just a crazy cocktail of chemicals that made my brain finally go kaput. I finished the last dose of Zoloft on November 5th, and that was the last of the meds, so now I'm off everything. My therapist thought the mania was medication-induced due to all the changes plus the addition of the stimulant, so the goal was to try to allow everything to settle down and see what "baseline" is for me right now.

And it has been frickin HARD.

Cervical vertigo. All-or-nothing sleep and appetite. Extreme sensory sensitivity. Random itchiness. Racing mind. Total inability to focus. And the worst part has been the mood swings.

I'm basically having all the symptoms of bipolar disorder in a rapid-cycle format. It may be cyclothymia, or it may be the withdrawal effects from all the meds, but regardless... It's been quite the roller coaster. The nerd in me has been fascinated by the experiential knowledge of it all, since I majored in Psychology and have always loved learning about it, but the overall negative effects on me and my family have been difficult.

I'm someone who has always relied completely on being highly capable and in control. I find my worth in my productivity and competence. And it has caused increasing stress throughout my life. I've been praying for years that God would break me of it, and I can see how he is using this to do precisely that -- lovingly trying to answer my request to be freed of this relentless pursuit of the illusion of control. He's inviting me to simple, joyful life of trust. The perspective shift is so freeing when I realize that I don't need to have it all figured out because he already does, and I can just rest in his loving guidance and look to him for the next step instead of trying to plan out every possible outcome and strategy. I went on a reflective retreat in the Santa Cruz mountains and just felt so encouraged and loved in the way he invited me to let my shoulders down and to ground myself in his warm provision and care.

But the change doesn't happen overnight.

So in the middle of a total storm of bipolar symptoms -- days of mania followed by days of depressive episodes and being so new at it all that I don't know how to navigate "normal life" with all of that -- I'm also trying to rewire 34 years' worth of the way I think and act. BUT it's a blessedly simple process: the only thing I have to worry about is this moment. I can't affect the future or the past. So all I have is right now, and I can turn to God for guidance, encouragement, insight, or anything I need in this moment, and he is so faithful to give it. But man, it's easy to forget. ;)

Literally me with that right now, trying to figure it all out on my own before I remember I can't and don't need to:

Anyway, this got LONG, surprise surprise, but I've always enjoyed being vulnerable for the sake of connection and potential encouragement. And selfishly, I'd LOVE to hear from any of you who may have had similar experiences. Right now the fixation of my [very limited] capacity is on my photography business, but I've been feeling drawn to writing more and more, and have attempted a lil drabble here and there. So I'm just patiently waiting for the inspiration to return. :)

I have so appreciated the love from you all. I also haven't been as active with reading/reblogging/supporting/etc as I was, and that's just where I'm at right now, but please know that my heart is with you even if my brain is not, LOL.

If you made it this far, you get a gold star. Or a Howzer hug. Or somethin. :)

#freesia writes #mental health monday #just another manic monday #jk today was depressive

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chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter · 6 months

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Adhd Sanzu propaganda because I want to, I already convinced someone:

He's a chaotic gremlin (Not need to explain that).

Same way that happened with Kakucho and Izana. Sanzu's days and life revolve around Mikey (I don't think I need to put examples here). Mikey is Sanzu's special interest and I'm saying it without shame! (Maybe a little bit of shame only)

Sanzu doesn't have sociallization skills. At all. But in a specific way that gives me adhd vibes (putting the trauma a part). Sanzu as a kid is sweet but weird. We can see him not reacting to Baji's tantrums in a way that yeah, can be bc he's used to, but also, his focus is not there. He's awkward in a way that makes me think that he's used to not fit in, to be look as a weirdo every time he talks. So he does the "I'm not gonna talk at all because when I do people hates me". Then, as a teen no division wants him because he's "a wild horse". Excuse me? Have you seen half of Toman? It's because he's weird and doesn't fit in, the wild part would not bother them so much on it's own.

Sanzu doesn't have a middle point. He's always extreme. When he followed Muto became extremly quiet and calm, almost like a shadow (again, it could be literal thinking of the orders Muto gave him).

His weird poses once he's not hiding himself anymore. All the Bonten scene, he's just doing his show, talking too much, too loud and too fast.

All the energy he have also in Kanto Manji. He's so hyped with being with Mikey. Acting loud, being weird and saying things that are only funny in his head bc he forgot to explain the joke (besides the cryptic timeleaping things I mean).

I know in Bonten and Kanto Manji Sanzu is unhinged, but there is something in the way he does it, not caring at all if people gets him or not. It screams adhd "fuck you all i'm not masking anymore" mood so badly!

The katana. The freaking katana is so over the top and so dramatic. And he obviously cares about his katana a lot, he never drops it in the fight against Toman, not even when Taiju sends him flying.

The teatricals of his plans in general. He kills Mucho with a katana in the place where the Kanto Incident took place. And he takes his mask after doing it. Such dramatic and aesthetically pleasing way of killing people.

The train. Hello? This is not NT thinking. Killing everyone, okay, sure. But with a train? What? And he brings his katana just in case? No middle point legendary level here.

He plans chaos. He literally thinks for days how to do the most random and chaotic unhinged thing ever! (The train, the train!)

He have literal thinking. Mikey told him to "smile" so he does it once he's finally serving his king. A big grinn all the time.

His addiction. Since adhd brains don't have impulse control, we tend to be addicts more than the average (I know this part doesn't prove it but it checks too).

The way he have so much beef with people that is happening only in his head. Yeah, he's a hater. But also, I can see a lot of rejection sensitive dysphoria and overthinking because he's mind is telling him everyone would reject him.

He was childhood friends with Mikey and Baji. No one is neurotypical there xD

Visual stimulation. Bright pink and so many vivid/strident colors. C'mon, his bike is pink and pretty! That aesthetic makes my adhdbrain happy. He's obsessed with pink in a not at all NT way.

He's hypersensitive and can't handle some smells (Takemichi, I'm so sorry for you).

Twisted sense of danger over here too. But different than Kakucho. Where Kakucho runs towards danger, Sanzu is the one causing it directly.

Sanzu being banned from meetings in the final timeline. Because he doesn't know when to shut up since he never did masking here.

THE UNMASKING METAPHOR! I left this one for the last because I just realized yesterday and it's beautiful. When he enters the 5th Division, he stops being loud and wild (he's still weird bc Sanzu). The same moment he starts wearing the mask. There is something there, a ND teen who doesn't fit, who is tired and just want to be like the others, being told to "just do that for not driving so much attention on you". And he does it. He wears the physical mask and he starts acting different, doing masking (not literal this time). Until he frees himself of the physical mask. And he stops masking his symptoms, his full personality. He doesn't give a shit anymore about getting too much attention, he's so sick of hiding, that he thrieves in attention now (even in the final timeline does that, he's a youtuber). Unmasking legendary level! (And hardcore masking when he does it)

Edit bc I was sure I wrote this but apparently not: Sanzu has no interest in forming new relationships either. Like Kakucho with Izana, he only does with Mucho because Mikey told him to. But even if he has zero interest in forming new bonds, he's still the center of attention (after unmasking), still being there loudly, being a big part of what marks the dynamic of the group. The "I don't wanna make new friends" but "I can't stop talking and being loud in a group", also a classical adhd mood!

So... I think that's all I can't think for now. It's probably messy and chaotic but hey, it's a post about adhd, so that's fine, right? 🙈

@just-sp-in-inginthevoid spreading adhd!Sanzu like I promise.

Ps: here is the Autistic Kakucho Propaganda in case someone is curious. This two are a pack and they hate it so much 🤣

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers spoilers #sanzu haruchiyo #sanzu headcanons #tokyo revengers headcanons #also you know the 'autism vs adhd' meme? considering sanzu and kakucho are basically archnemesis... yeahh #adhd gremlin #adhd #adhd sanzu

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kerubimcrepin · 13 days

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Live-Read: The Remington Comic [PART 2]

TOME 11

We go, we steal, we leave… I don't want any trouble, Remington, got it? Wohaa, as if… I'm telling you, we steal Beating Heart and that's it.

The way Luis is drawn in this comic is so cute, sorry...

Very intrigued by the books standing on top of a flowerpot standing on top of a stool, the random kettle on the floor, a blanket half-covering an unidentified fucking object, more books, and what seems to be a bell, or a bottle, standing on the floor.

Kerubim and Atcham seem to have been away for A While. And Joris doesn't like to clean.

Make less noise when you walk. If we wake the guy up, meow to make him think a cat got into the home. Uh uh.

This idea is so stupid for so many reasons, both ones Remington and Grany should know, and ones known only to us... It's kind of admirable.

Also I still can't get over how fucking messy Joris is. Either it's his depression, his ADHD, or Kerubim's Upbringing that made him that way. Man...

Anyway,

Do you remember where it was stored? Don't worry. Here it is!

THE RANDOM ELEPHANT FIGURES?? I bet they're Keke's... Also, once again, many, many books left everywhere. He's insane.

Come here, you. What was that? No idea… You must have moved something that fell.

While I wish it was Luis, it's actually an unrelated monster under Bonta that will be a big problem in the next issue of the comic.

Come on… let's go! Yes… that was indeed the talking bow meow… who was transformed by a certain Ush.

The way he's talking about them here is so science-y. As if whether they would come or not was like an experiment to him. It's so funny.

Also, Pupuce!!!!! My beloved Pupuce. <3

My instincts tell me to go hang out in the slums for a while. If only he could stay there...

LMAOOO.

Once again, I am grateful that Ush's weird and creepy relationship with cats (albeit... sentient cats, at least) was retconned into a more positive one in season 4 of Wakfu. I still think it's fucking weird, but it certainly makes him funnier as a character.

Ush hates Bump, and it's really like... "my noble sentient catfucking (while i myself shapeshift into a cat) vs. your creepy and barbarous panty collecting."

Hello, you may call me Joris, I would like to meet the noble Ush in order to ask him a few questions about a rogue and a bow meow that... Master does not accept visitors. ??

THIS IS SO FUNNY. THE WAY HE INTRODUCED HIMSELF?? The way this guy closed the door. God...

Also, his cunty little hand on chest thing.... I CAN'T.

Mhh, very well… Let's see. Mhm... If anyone knows where the beating heart is, then that person is here. YYAAAAHH!

LITTLE GUY!!!!!!!!!!?? YOU SWAG TOO HARD. I CAN'T DO THIS AYMORE. His pure and beautiful whimsy... He's so happy to be running... Like a gazelle.

YAAH AH AH!! Anyone? And who're you? We're prisoners… Get us out of here, I beg you. D'you know a rogue and his bow meow brother?

Y'know, this page does haunt me a little. Because he's so, so informal here — and kind of insane too. HE BRINGS OVER A STOOL TO TALK TO TWO PEOPLE ACTIVELY BLEEDING OUT, JUST TO TALK TO THEM WHILE MAKING EYE CONTACT. After that, no vous/vous for them, and when they ask for help, he's like "yeah no, first tell me — do you know that guy who wronged me?"

I'm obsessed with him.

Do I know them? Of course, I know them. You could even say I'm here because of them. They talked about Ush, that's why I came. You get us out of here, and we'll help you find them. Oki-doki... cross my heart! But you'll have to find the key to open it. A key? To close things it might be necessary, yes, but not to open. You're small but mighty, I say!

While I think Joris is a good person and would have helped them even if they knew nothing, I do think that asking about Remington before he freed them was a way of subtly suggesting they help him in return.

Love the way he says "oki-doki"... this 600yo man and his multitudes...

Also, Joris can bend metal. Now imagine him chained up and just... casually breaking the chains, once he's done pretending to be trapped. No wonder Ush needed dragon slobber to restrain him.

He's a bit shaken up, but he should be fine… Stop that… I'm going to puke.

Beautiful.

This reaction Ush has to this huge-ass thing goes out to the Ush fans among my readers.

#remicomic #ro liveblogs dofus #krosmoz #dofus #wakfu #joris jurgen

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grotesquehorse · 9 months

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Red, White and Royal Blue (2023) is a tragedy, but not for the reasons that people who hate the book on principle are talking about. It's not just a bad adaptation, it's a bad movie. There is nothing redeeming about it except the casting of Sarah Shahi as Zahra.

First of all, I want to say, that the book DOES have depth. Just because a book is a romcom doesn't mean it doesn't have depth. And I'm sick and tired of seeing the criticism from people who didn’t read the book say "people are complaining that the movie doesn't have depth but the book didn't have depth either, so what were you expecting". It fucking has depth. And I have a right to be upset that the movie absolutely fucking butchered it.

The Casting

The casting, although it has been criticized, has not been criticized for the correct aspects. Nick and Taylor have enough chemistry to be passable for a romcom - it's not great, but at least it wasn't Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant in Two Weeks Notice.

The casting for Alex was not good. I have nothing against Taylor, but his thousand-yard stare had nothing behind the eye(lashes) and actively hindered any and all of Alex’s interactions. Nick was better; Henry is a more subtle character (as he has to be), and this was portrayed much more convincingly.

Nora was fucking annoying and her actress was bad. Uma Thurman does not belong in this movie. Stephen Fry, although the funniest possible actor to put in that role, shouldn't have been in this movie either.

Alex, as a character, was butchered. He should have a Type-A, bouncing off the walls, undiagnosed ADHD, horny but anxious confidence about him. Movie Alex was entirely wrong. I would call him suave, but I don't find him charming. The audience is supposed to think he's suave, maybe, but this is the wrong character trait to give him. He is supposed to be confident and charming, but not suave. There is nothing going on in his head, and this is especially detrimental when Book Alex’s main personality trait is that he overthinks everything at every possible angle.

The Alex and Henry Relationship

The first kiss between Alex and Henry and the scene preceding it are all wrong. Movie Alex is kissing multiple different women and Henry is much more isolated than in the book. Alex’s first line in the confrontation is supposed to be "what are you doing out here?" not "did I do something wrong?" when Henry leaves the party; it's supposed to be more nuanced. Henry should be feeling "of course he's straight, he can't want me, I can't want him" not "betrayed because Alex kissed someone who is not me". Alex is not supposed to know that Henry is upset. Alex is not supposed to think that he is the cause of Henry being upset. The movie cuts any of the depth between them. Another core personality trait of Alex, is that he is selfish. He forgets to text June back about dinner, he gets wrapped up in his own head, he doesn’t understand his friendship/relationship with Liam. He doesn’t understand that he may be the cause of Henry’s emotions.

The camping scenes touched on Alex being selfish, but again, in all the wrong ways. He starts talking about how they could be out as a real couple after the reelection, but he fails to consider that Henry is a prince of England. Truly baffling writing choice, considering Alex is supposedly intelligent and political and, while selfish, extremely aware of the politics surrounding his and Henry’s relationship. Book Alex would never have suggested that they come out the way that Movie Alex did. Movie Alex is a fucking idiot, and didn’t do much to even try to convince me otherwise.

Although I hoped that the movie would be more romcom and less political/royal drama, I’m still dissatisfied with how the movie executed this. There was no journey watching Alex and Henry become friends. There was no "I’ve been in love with you for years" from Henry. There was no "you obsessively looked at his picture in a magazine" from Alex. A large part of the animosity between them, for Alex, is that they are constantly compared in the media. They are uniquely perfect for each other because they are both in very specific spotlights. This aspect of their relationship is completely absent from the movie.

My friend wouldn't let me skip the sex scene, but just know that it was fucking uncomfortable.

The Implications

The combination of Liam and Rafael Luna into one journalist character is a twofold character assassination. You can't take a high school hook up and a gay political professional (who Alex looked up to) and combine them into a journalist. It doesn't work. Miguel, the journalist, acts like a villain immediately - sunken eyes with a scorned lover attitude. He's a joke. There's no nuance in taking two crucial pieces of Alex’s sexuality journey and mashing them together to create an evil gay guy with no explanation.

It's implied that Miguel leaked the emails, but this ignores the actual triple agenting that Rafael Luna was doing. This movie is rated R, but we can't talk about a man attempting to sexually abuse another man because we can't talk about sexual assault amongst the LGBT community; that would make the gays look bad. But we can diminish two characters and create an evil gay journalist archetype who just wants to out Alex and Henry for his own professional gain (and maybe get back at Alex for refusing to hook up with him again). So, you tell me, which gay representation is "worse" for the gays?

Miguel had to be created to be the villain so that Richards, the republican candidate running against Alex’s mom, the one who abused men and attempted to sexually assault Rafael Luna, couldn't be the villain that he is in the books. Because that would alienate the republican audience. Because the republican audience is so crucial to the marketing of what is considered the first mainstream gay romcom.

The Technical Aspects

The social media editing was bad. The way the emails were done was bad. There was no version of this movie that would be successful. There's too much reliance in the book on texts and emails, and you can't build a relationship through technology in a movie. It's always unsuccessful.

The cinematography is Hulu-original bland. The directing was incompetent. The script was incoherent at worst, and over written at best. "trouble you no longer" is a bad line. "he grabbed my hair in a way that made me understand the difference between rugby and football." what the fuck are you talking about.

I hate that the movie was bad, but it was bad. I don't know what fucking movie these other people are watching, but Red, White and Royal Blue (2023) is fucking unwatchable.

#txt #do NOT talk to me about this movie. i know the fandom type.#do NOT reply and put stupid shit #i delete replies and block people for ANYTHING.#anti rwrb 2023

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yippieitsarvensart · 8 months

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Tweels hc doodles + notes!

Goodness me, I've not been working on these for very long but here's all of what I've thought of within 2 days of thinking about them!! I basically started writing about them the moment I finished drawing "the fuck you brothers" post (9/24) (and today, 9/26) I totally have been thinking about them more after I wrote all this, so I will be continuing on with my hcs right here, under the cut :3 (keep in mind I have not yet played twst! If I get anything gravely wrong correct me!) (9/28, edit: I downloaded twst y'all...)

Both of the twins are autistic, just being on very different ends of er... intensity? Idk how to word that. I just mean that Floyd is someone who has trouble regulating his emotions and stims a lot. Jade doesn't stim as often, he probably would if he were infodumping about mushrooms/his terrariums or whatever else. I think I mean. That Jade suppressed his autistic tendencies by a lot to seem more like a gentleman, while Floyd doesn't really give much of a shit and probably doesn't even know he's autistic.

on that note they both have ADHD. AuDHD brothers.

Anyways as I way saying abt Floyd stimmies; He stims a LOT. Just, all the damn time. It gets so annoying for a lot of people and everyone knows he can't control it. His clingyness is also stimming, he's very touchy. A lot of stim toys don't actually help him but he does calm down significantly more when he's wearing headphones and listening to loud music. That's what stimulates him the most.

Jade only stims when excited, yeah I mentioned that. But did I mention he also stims a lot when stressed. In front of costumers, if he was stressed he might only fiddle with his fingers behind his back. But as soon as he gets away it's full body stimming time baby. Mans is not okay but he cannot let that mask slip!! (I forgot the word before, but I meant to say in my first dotpoint that jade is better at masking than Floyd!!)

Floyd mcr liker >_< (songs about depression and drugs to think about violence to!) Floyd also likes shit like "41 mins of roblox music" or any spongebob music. skull emoji.

Jade Laufey liker :33 (calm songs to think about violence to!)

Floyd likes dancing around in his room to music. Like really getting into it. Putting one song on loop and doing the same dance moves over and over again. (stimming) (oh my god I'm PROJECTING AGAIN stop....)

Jade likes drawing mushrooms. He's really good at drawing nature and when I say "good" I mean if you looked at it, you'd think it was a picture. Like abnormally good for someone who used to not even have paper available...

I saw this from a moot once on twitter I think, but they both (+ Azul) probably had a hard time adjusting to walking around everywhere instead of swimming when they first came onto land. And I think there was something about holding on to bars on stairs WAYY too tight because they feel so wobbly going up them. Same with like, escalators? and elevators? didn't fucking trust them. And they still don't sometimes... Adding onto this I think that they'd both get really frustrated at first with it. Like genuinely really upset; Floyd dramatically falling to the floor and flailing around on the verge of tears while Jade punches the ground over and over... They obviously got better at land things after a long while but for a bit they were just so. not okay LOL

I think for casual/home clothes they'd both be really into big fluffy jumpers. massive fucking huge fluffy shits. They'd be all over the texture and it would be so so texture /pos drooling emoji

I had a little thing that I thought of where I would give Floyd Heart shaped eye shines PLUS an extra smaller not heart eye shine. And giving Jade a square shaped shine with no extra shines. It just makes so much sense to me. Like I can't explain it very well but if you get it, you get me. Do you get me...

WHICH leads me to say then that when Floyd gets MAD he would have NO eye shines. Do you get me. I totally make sense right/. And Jade getting happy about anything even if it doesn't show on his face it would totally show in his eyes... Which also brings me back to something I wrote in my doodle notes with the pupils being like cats... OUGH I'M GOING INSANE DO I MAKE SENSE

another thing my twt moot said !! Floyd would hate necklaces/rings/other accessories and jewelry! It relates back to my point about Floyd hating the feeling of tight clothes, and things touching his skin too much. I feel like if he had say, a necklace on for like 0.1s he would rip it the fuck off, destroying the necklace in the process

Floyd: :3 (aggressive)

Floyd loving to squeeze people but hurting them is 90% of the time on purpose hurting and 10% accidental hurting and when it IS accidental he gets so upset about it. I like to think Floyd is the more emotional out of the two... just so many emotions in that boy. like he just !! wants to give you love !!! but he's so strong he breaks ur ribs !!!! many of ur ribs!! ur honestly surprised you haven't punctured a lung yet!!!

On that note they BOTH are extremely touch starved. Floyd would fucking LOVE it if someone were to lay down on top of him for hours he would feel so squished!! and warm and nice!! and comfy!

Jade on the other hand, LOVES holding hands. holding ONTO something holding onto someONE.

Jade is a gift giver (love language) I bet you can't guess what Floyd is

His love language is Physical touch. Yeah

Jade getting people way too many gifts when it's a special occasion for them because he thinks they might think it's weird if he gets them a gift on any other day.

Floyd hyperpop liker (just overall really likes loud thrashy music or whatever)

Floyd also really got into those games where you have to beat the shit out of a dummy. He doesn't like ones where you have to TIME a hit to make it work (makes him annoyed bc he can't do it) Games like Pou I think....

While Jade enjoys colour by number or those hue games? just doing it in his free time.

#Please be autistic about them with me #Share your own hcs with me in comments/reblogs and if I like them I might add them #sorry guys I really like spreading the autism illness to all my faves #that's why I keep talking about how tismy they are to me #hope you don't mind #teehee #digital art #art #disney twst #twst fanart #twst hcs #twst #jade leech #floyd leech #leech twins #tweels #hcs #neurodivergent #disney twisted wonderland

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talisidekick · 6 months

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I need your help...

If you don't know me, hello, I'm Accalia, I go by Tali Sidekick online on Youtube, Instagram, and on the rarest of occasions Twitch. I'm a 29 year old transgender woman from Canada, who came out and began socially and medically transitioning in 2021. I stream largely on Youtube and on the rare occasion I make videos (it's been over a year since I last did that).

I could use your help affording my legal name change. I've been trying to afford it myself but I'm unable to for reasons I'll get into below. The link is in my blog description, but I'll post it here:

Recently, while walking home from work (I don't make enough to afford public transit or my own vehicle or a bicycle) I got attacked by a middle-aged man in a dimly lit residential neighbourhood. I got away, and thankfully I didn't give him enough time to do more than grab me by the arm. However, I had to file a police report, which gave me two options: use my legal name which at current is my deadname (ie. a name I no longer wish to use) which would be distressing to say the least, or submit it anonymously. I chose the latter which unfortunately does little besides let the public know that someone dangerous with a vague description is in their area. I wish I could have put my name on that report but using my legal name as it stands now is ... I can't.

To add to this, I was saving up, but unfortunately the student loans I owe decided to charge me during an appeal process (they weren't supposed to) and when the charge partially bounced they denied my appeal (which isn't supposed to happen under the contract agreement I signed) because of "outstanding payments". The appeal process also only looked at my gross income for one month, specifically the month I got paid 3 times in (it happens only once a year) and decided to combine all three payments into an equal 2 and evaluated my paycheck at around 25/hr when I only make 16/hr and has thus denied me reduced loans payment (I'm working on this but it's adding to my stress). So at current, the $300 I had extra got eaten by the National Student Loans Services Centre (NSLSC) again and from previous experience even though I should be reimbursed once this is cleared up, I won't be.

I would have also had more (remember that extra third paycheck?) but my health insurance stopped covering me because despite being signed up to a provincial pharmacy program they decided I wasn't, and forced me to buy my hormones and ADHD meds out of pocket. They only -just- reinstated coverage, but getting reimbursed will take over a month possibly 2.

As such, I have exactly $48 in savings and $7 in my basic checking account.

I want to get my name changed, I've been trying for over 2 years, and it's been impossible. Every time I have the money to spare, the NSLSC eats it and doesn't give it back, some medical thing comes up, or some unforseen cost rears its head and consumes my meager savings. The cost averages out to about $450 because it requires Finger Printing for a background check, Notary Fees, Processing Fees, and Reprinting Fees for my Birth Certificate, Drivers License, and Marriage License.

And if the $450 goal is exceeded, any excess getsput towards affording the $6000 surgery cost of getting SRS/GRS (Sex Reassignment Surgery/Gender Reassignment Surgery). I have until December next year before my government will no longer cover the cost of the surgery supposedly.

If I can get help here, I really want all my legal doccuments to read "Llorelei Accalia [Lastname]". I'm so tired of having to explain to people that I'm transgender because the name, face, and (somehow) voice don't match.

Currently at:

$50/$450

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dogydayz · 1 year

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I think one of my favorite parts of the "autistic Shadow" headcanon is the fact that he's designed to be the Ultimate Lifeform. I don't mean this in an annoying, "autism is a superpower" dumb way (even if I do find my own autism to actually be quite helpful at times, the whole concept of calling it that is stupid and used to hurt people like us), I mean it in a "Shadow was genetically engineered to be an Ultimate Lifeform, he's designed to survive and be able to do things no one else can, yet he still struggles with something that could be classified as a disability in his daily life." I dont know if im wording it properly, but there's something about how he's still viewed as that Ultimate Lifeform despite dealing with something that many people would immediately label as a trait that makes someone "inherently" less capable of survival. I know that many folks struggle with autism in way more severe ways than I may (though much of me saying this is kinda me repressing and refusing to acknowledge that it IS still a disability for me, but still, i recognize others DO deal with more severe aspects than I do), however I really just dislike how autistic characters get labeled as inherently "unable" to live "right". He's a character whose whole thing is that he makes his own path for himself, he fights even if the world hates him, he doesn't back down and even when it looks like he is, he's just playing it smart. Even if he does have these struggles, he IS able to find a life for himself, he isn't held down by expectations or what people tell him he is. In fact, that's ANOTHER whole part of him as a character, that he breaks free from what others say he should be. Even if he were confirmed to be autistic, he wouldn't be "the autistic character". He'd still be himself, he'd be Shadow, they'd be confirming that he has certain struggles, but he'd still be /himself/.

His story wouldn't change, he wouldn't be bound by the chains of what people think an autistic character in media should look like, he wouldn't be "the character who's autistic" (as if they aren't all already autistic, but that's a whole different topic lol), he'd just be Shadow, and Shadow would just happen to be autistic.

Again, I may be wording this wrong and if i am PLEASE forgive me, I'm trying so hard to put my thoughts into words,,,

I think this is coming a bit from a place of me seeing Prime Sonic and thinking to myself "holy fucking shit he's got ADHD but it's not shown as all of him". Of course they havent truly confirmed Sonic to be ADHD but like, i think they probably did do it purposefully here, but maybe that's just me? I just see him do stuff and think "wow yeah, I've done that before! And I do it because i have ADHD! and he has some of my struggles!! But his friends still love him even if they're annoyed by him at times, and he still isn't a bad person even if he did fuck up! Any they handle it with nuance that real people experience in life!!"

And that's how I'd see autistic Shadow being handled. He already has a lotta the traits, but they don't confirm it being based on things like sensory overload or whatever, despite the fact that they really could. And even if they did, he'd be handled just as if it were another trait. It wouldn't be some defining attribute to him, him being autistic wouldn't be some selling point, there wouldn't be any "look! There's now an autistic character in this media!!".

But back to the main point.... Basically, him being autistic doesn't make him any less of the Ultimate Lifeform, and I think that's about the most extreme way to get across the point of "being autistic doesn't make you any less of a person or any less important". He was GENETICALLY ENGINEERED. Yet he still is autistic and it was decided "yep we succeeded in creating the Ultimate Lifeform!", so much so that the military wanted to use him as a WEAPON. Nothing about his potential disability made him any less of a success, or any less of a protector to Maria, or any less of a wonderful creation to Gerald, or any less of anything else to anyone he knows.

Something about that is just... a really nice idea to me. Maybe not for everyone, but to me that's inspiring as fuck, and reassuring to, to think about...

#sonic #sth #sonic headcanons #sorta #shadow the hedgehog #character rant #autism posting #autism rant #actually autistic #long post #text post #autistic shadow

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sadiewayne · 3 months

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are you more or less likely to like the percy jackson show if you have adhd?

TL;DR at the bottom

this whole idea came about because i was seeing people complain about the pacing of the show and i was so confused because i thought the pacing was perfect and then i thought maybe it's because i have adhd and so of course i would think the pacing was great and so i ran a poll to look at the results and here are those results

important things to note

a) i have adhd (diagnosed)

b) i study a stem degree

ok here we go

short answer

statistically no, but i disagree (i'll get to it)

longer answer

i did a poll comparing if you have adhd and if you like the show, these were the results (and here so you can see how i wanted people to answer)

(yes i voted, my opinion also counts)(and yes, there are flaws in the design but i only had 12 options and this was mainly about adhd)

and idk about you but looking at those numbers i can see a few things

number 1: most people like the show, 87.8% in fact

and if you take out the people that didn't care, it's 92.9% of people who did care aka a lot

quick stats rundown

for everyone with adhd (thats the first 6 options) 3% didn't like the show

for those with other neurodiversities and not adhd, it was 12%

yeah, thats 4 times higher (it works out at a whole 2 people but again, limits of the poll)

ANYWAY, i ran some statistical tests (don't stress, i don't understand them either, i will not be focussing on them)

first, chi squared (compares expected values for each option with the actual values i got)

yeah that number is small, like very small, like 2.8 quintillionths

but i ran it in R and got a very different number

and oh lookie here that's a p-value about 0.05 and so we must accept the null hypothesis (basically that yeah, that's expected)

which makes NO SENSE but whatever, the computer tells me it's that

enough of chi-squared, i also ran a z-test (i googled what to do and apparently this was the right test, idk what it does ngl)

i didn't run this one in R bc i have no idea how to do that

but the p-value is again, about 0.05 and so accept that there is no significant difference

BUT I DISAGREE

ok i don't disagree with the stats but i disagree that there isn't a difference

it doesn't take a genius to see the difference

3% of people with adhd didn't like the show but 12% of other nd's did like-

come on that has to mean something

so i ran a chi squared test on just the adhd data and...

1.9 octillionths

wha-

so did it in R and got a warning saying it probably wasn't accurate (it's probably the 0) so i ran fishers exact test (idk man thats what i was told to run by the internet) and got this...

so errrrrr yeah

apparently the same goes for the adhd data to which i can kind of get but also dont when

0.6% of people didn't like the show and were diagnosed as an adult but 1.2% didn't like the show and were self-diagnosed, with almost the same number of votes (it works out as a 1 person difference)

and no one who was diagnosed as a child disliked it like WHAT?!?!?!

also no neurotypicals disliked it, love y'all for that /gen

idk, i think the sample size is too small to run accurate tests, that or im doing it wrong which is a very high probability

so whilst statistically, the answer is no, i'm seeing a pattern emerge

but i am a scientist so i cannot say yes or no which SUCKS bc i see a pattern and i want to know MORE but tumblr doesn't have a great mechanism for polls so i can't ask all the questions i want to

TL;DR

the stats say there's no significant difference and so i must concur even if i don't want to

the show was amazing and i'm very excited for season 2 for reasons i don't want to spoil for people who haven't read the book (but go read the books they are just as good)

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copperbadge · 1 year

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Hi Sam! I’m really interested in what you said about taking an adderall before socializing so that you don’t have to spend the next several days agonizing about the awkward shit you said. I’ve never heard anyone talk about that as a benefit before.

Is it because taking it makes you less likely to say the awkward shit at all? Or because it just makes you less likely to fixate on it later? I mean, either way sounds pretty good, I’m just curious and intrigued.

Yeah, it's pretty fascinating. I'm going to try to put this in coherent order but there is a lot going on here, so let's start with the disclaimer that a lot of this is anecdotal or based in casual research, so I don't have sources to cite, but you should be able to google and explore for yourself.

SHORT VERSION: Adderall doesn't alter my behavior, at least as far as I can tell; it might somewhat inhibit my bad habit of interrupting, but that’s not why I take it. I take it because it prevents me from reacting emotionally to awkward moments in a social situation or remembering those moments later. The result is that instead of thinking "Oh, that thing I did was super awkward" and obsessing over it, when it probably wasn't awkward and if it was nobody remembers it anyway, I just don't have any strong emotion attached to it so I don't remember and feel bad about it later.

It's like if the color red constantly burned your eyes, and you could take a drug that would turn down the saturation. You still see the color, but now you see it the way everyone else sees it, and it doesn't hurt anymore.

The long version is...more complex, but I'm including it because I want to talk about why this maybe happens.

The reason I have such fraught emotions surrounding socializing is that I have Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, which is a common aspect of ADHD. It's not the only reason one might obsessively relive embarrassing moments, but if you have ADHD, RSD is the likely cause. RSD is linked to poor emotional regulation which derives from a deficiency in executive function. So this whole family of ADHD symptoms -- poor focus, poor short-term memory, time blindness -- all come from a basic failure of executive function, and so does RSD. And luckily for me, my poor executive function can be treated with stimulants (some people, even people with ADHD, don’t respond well to them).

Even though RSD seems dissimilar to other aspects of ADHD, because the stimulant addresses a neurological root cause, anything stemming from that cause is, to some degree, alleviated by the medication.

RSD can manifest in various ways. I'm generally fine when I'm present in a social situation, but I struggle to resolve shame and anxiety around past behavior. I have spent a lot of time worrying that people who, let's be clear, I know love and respect me, have finally had enough of me and something I said or did was the last straw. I know intellectually this is not the case and I have spent my adult life striving to remind myself of that so that I don’t come off as a needy creep who constantly has to be reassured of other peoples’ affections. Emotionally, however, I was incapable of reconciling these memories. They just hung around in my brain, causing me a lot of pain and regret.

So there’s a chain reaction of saying something, realizing it may have been somewhere between "slightly weird" and "deeply upsetting", and encoding it in my memory with strong emotions of shame and fear attached to it. I then involuntarily relive those memories and the emotions attached to them afterward -- usually only for a few days, but depending on the event, sometimes off and on for years. I suspect this derives from our very early ancestors, who had to hard-code dangerous situations into their memories so if they encountered them again they'd recognize them as dangerous. My brain simply encodes every social interaction as having a fairly high level of danger. This situation is fucking life-threatening, don't go near one again or you'll feel like this forever. Except in my case "this situation" is not dangerous, it's just a dinner party with friends or a meeting with a colleague or a first date.

It seems that the Adderall switches off that instinct to categorize social interaction as inherently dangerous by allowing me to regulate my emotions. If I’m not feeling fear in the moment -- because there’s no reason to be afraid! -- then my brain doesn’t categorize the moment as dangerous, and won’t remember it negatively later. I won’t really remember it at all. So my memories go from “A dinner party where I said three terrible things that I feel shame over” to “A dinner party where I had some really nice conversations.” Do I remember the conversations? Not in detail, and that’s fine. That’s how memory is supposed to work.

And now, because I know if I take an Adderall half an hour before a party starts I won’t feel shame or fear after the party ends, I’m even more capable of relaxing and enjoying myself, meaning I’m even less likely to feel negative emotions that would cause me to remember things with shame later. I just thought shame was a price you paid for socializing; I knew the amount I felt wasn’t right, but I thought everyone else just put up with some amount of it. But no, it turns out when your brain isn’t constantly looking for a fucking lion trying to eat you in the middle of cocktail hour, the reason people go out and socialize is that it’s...fun to do. And it turns out when I’m not subconsciously terrified that I’m about to be drowned in quicksand, I actually form fond and positive memories of things.

Which is a little wild to be experiencing for the first time at the age of 43, but better late than never. And it means that while I still struggle a great deal with emotional intimacy, I’m much, much more capable of maintaining social contacts and deepening friendships because my friends can see and talk to me face-to-face and I can enjoy my time with them more.

#sam has adhd

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