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just-a-fangirl13 · 3 years

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Thoughts & Theories about MacGyver 5x10 [MacRiley]

HOLY SHIT!

This episode was absolutely INSANE. Im writing out my thoughts once and for all because I need to stop thinking about everything that happened (I highly doubt I will be able to but here's to trying)

SPOILERS FOR 5x10 OFCOURSE

Straight off the bat, I was screaming *internally* and yelling at Mac when he showed the diamond to Bozer. I suspected it yesterday when we got the snippet of Murdoc saying the words DIAMOND and RING with extra emphasis..(everyone on twitter said I was jumping to conclusions.. I thought so too honestly) But damn I did NOT expect them to actually do that!

Now here's why I am not mad about it anymore. [this is my interpretation you are free to disagree]

Firstly, when Mac told Bozer he was going to propose he didnt say I’m doing it because I love Desi or I want to spend the rest of our lives together or because she’s the one (doesn't mean he doesnt care for her ofcourse)

He said “Ever since I lost my dad & Jack, I have been thinking about the bigger picture and a commitment to make things work is exactly what Desi and I need right now. A grand romantic gesture.” He wanted to propose for stability so he could finally be on the same page with her. They never really defined their relationship before and this was a way for Mac to final bring it together. A grand romantic gesture is usually something people use to win their partners back which is what Mac was trying to do I guess. It almost sounds like he has to do it so he doesn't lose her again

(ill get to my second reason in the end)

Then ofcourse Bozer tells Riley about it so she can be prepared. Bozer is such a good friend. He is supportive of Mac AND wants to protect Riley. I love him for it! He really is doing everything to be the best friend he can to both of them. (Leannas death was so painful and I just want to hug him but thankfully Riley had that covered.)

Next we get the BIG REVEAL. The moment all of us had been waiting for.

The moment that SHOOK Angus MacGyver and CHANGED EVERYTHING!

Rileys Feelings!

“You want me to say it out loud? Fine. Yes I had feelings for Mac. There I said it. and yeah watching him and Desi together was breaking my heart so I moved out of his house. I should have said something to him a long time ago but I didn’t and now its over. ”

I had the opposite of a HEART ATTACK! (my heart rate was through THE ROOF!)

I have to say they really really outdid themselves on this reveal.

SIDE NOTE: If anyone comes for Riley and tries to call her a slut or a home wrecker? You will have me to deal with. Even after Murdoc played the clip of her confession she still tried to deny it and brush it off so it wouldn't complicate things for Mac and Desi. If Riley had wanted, she could have easily told Mac this to his face while he was dating Desi and then let things happen from there but she DIDNT. She kept that secret buried so deep she herself was in denial.

(also if anyone calls Mac a player or anything like that.. I will end you. He is doing his best to deal with everything that has happened to him and people keep giving him shit for it....)

Anyways, we see Mac’s expression & he is just confused and shocked and clearly not trying to think about it because it changed EVERYTHING for him.

[Murdoc saying I THINK IM ON TEAM RILEY was a HUGE HIGHLIGHT for me! I love him so damn much!]

Desi took it really well too actually. If they keep going down this road of growth and maturity for her I think I could actually like her again. (Russ too when he apologised to Bozer)

She didnt throw a hissy fit or say I knew it or look at Riley like she was the villain. She focused on the mission & I respect her for that.

(Riley does say, “the next thing you are going to hear on that recording-” and then gets cut off by Desi.. If this will come into play at some point later on or if it was just her trying to explain herself, remains to be seen.)

Then after the climax, we finally hear Riley say the words to Mac in real time and we get our FIRST MacRiley hug of the season!

At this point I thought they would agree to be friends and make the friendzone thing clear BUT NOPE. (you have no idea how happy I am about it not going down like that!)

I was also a puddle on the floor. SO

“Mac look-”

“You don’t have to say anything if you dont want to. Really.”

“I want to. Last year in Germany. I realised I was starting to have feelings for you. Real feelings. I didnt want to make anything weird between you and Desi. I didnt want to mess up our work or our friendship so I decided to bury it. Until the feelings passed.”

“Emotions aren’t a science. You can’t control them.”

Gosh they are so perfect together! The way they look at each other and the HUG! OH MY GOD THE HUG! Its just perfection.

Now we also see this from Desi’s POV. Again no anger or jealousy from her. I think it was an understanding. She realised that she and Mac were never going to work.. maybe a little pain but honestly everything that went down with her and Mac was her fault too. The lack of trust and understanding was always a problem for them. Sure, things were going well but she didnt seem like she was ready for a commitment if im being honest. If Mac had proposed I think Desi would have said no.(again nothing wrong with that)

She didnt want to label their relationship..they haven't said the words I love you to each other and I dont think they even live together. It really was way too sudden.(these are just things im assuming people define how well a relationship is going by.. I have no experience.)

Then ofcourse we have what im calling the goodbye scene. Its the break up before the break up in my opinion.

Desi tells Mac that they should pretend the last 24 hours never happened (that might actually include Mac wanting to propose but make of it what you will..) and that they should have a clean slate. But its very clear from Mac’s face and Desi sees it too that he isnt 100% onboard with it. He cant forget about it.

Which is when Desi says “Look Mac just do whatever you feel is right” and Mac looks confused.

She then gives him a goodbye kiss.

Look if you have ever watched any show/movie before where the characters are saying goodbye to each other or breaking each others hearts...THERE IS ALWAYS A KISS ON THE CHEEK. A final farewell of sorts.

That is what it seemed like to me. It was Desi telling Mac to do what he has to. Even if it inevitably leads to their break up.

Again real emotional maturity from Desi here!

Then we get the scene, Monica Macer (the show runner) tweeted about back in December.

Mac knocking on someones door. If im being honest? I thought it was Desi’s place and he was going to propose...

BUT it turned out to be Riley’s.

Mac clearly hasn't stopped thinking about what happened. I wouldnt either if my best friend who has put her life on the line for me and trusts me 100%, now has feelings for me? That would turn my world upside down too.

especially if I had feelings for her that I buried so deep that I never acknowledged them.

Also this is my scenario for how their first kiss goes down just FYI.. (Mac showing up at Rileys doorstep and finally confessing his feelings and kissing her *probably won't happen that way now though, but I still love it*)

Mac hesitates for a second before finally knocking on her door.

“Mac? Everything okay?”

“I can’t pretend like the last 24 hours didnt just happen. They did. So I gotta ask. Did it work?”

“Did what work?”

“Hiding your emotions and letting it pass. Did they go away?”

and I proceeded to pass out. My brain just checked out...

Now initially in all my freaking out I thought Mac was asking Riley about his feelings. If HE buried them deep enough would he still be able to move on with Desi but then I rewatched it and I realised he was asking RILEY if her feelings were still there, if there was still a possibility of something ever happening.

She never told him its all good now! my feelings are gone and it was a long time ago. She told him she buried it but he needed to know if a future with Riley was something tangible.

BASICALLY ANGUS MACGYVER ASKED RILEY DAVIS IF SHE WAS STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM. *I think I need to go to a hospital now*

So this was my second reason for not being annoyed about the proposal. The writers used it to show what a huge impact it would have on Mac. How much Rileys feelings would actually mean to him. the GAME CHANGER it would be.

A friend of mine said it was kinda funny and a little jarring but I liked it. (I could have done without the proposal) But I understand why they did it. They couldnt have Mac and Desi break up the same day Riley’s feelings came out because then people would hate Mac. They had to make him want to take the next step with Desi but then drop a bomb on him, that would make him question everything.

Again this is what I took away from it.

BUT GOSH WAS THIS EPISODE AMAZING!

I do get that some people are not happy with this and some said it was too sudden *not like we’ve been waiting since season 1 or anything* but I think after 5x11 things will slow down again. Mac may break up with Desi only at the end of the season when he finally comes to terms with his feelings. (Some people are still cautious and I get it but after everything that just happened I find it hard to believe that Mac and Riley won't end up together after all.. not to mention the leaked script conversation between Mac and Riley from 5x15)

Now I dont know how the final scene ends.. they definitely dont get called away for their solo mission immediately after because Mac’s cheek injury is relatively healed in this stills, which means Riley does answer Mac’s question. She may try to avoid it or deflect but he is standing right there so...who knows.

Next weeks episode is a MacRIley solo mission and lets just say things definitely are heating up a bit..*wink wink*

YUP IM HYPED.

BRING ON THE SEXUAL TENSION AND THE ANGST!

#MacGyver #Angus MacGyver #riley davis #macriley #mac x riley #macriley is endgame #macgyver 510 #murdoc

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stargirlrchive · 4 years

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Hi! Can I ask for angsty Specer Reid with reader working as a medic? They dont see each other lately, mostly because his gf avoiding him, because they are both stressed of work so every discussion end with fight so in the end reader is insecure of herself and not sure if she is good enough for him. She starts overwork herself more to improve her skills and satisfaction,forgetting about proper sleep and meals. And during their next fight she just pass out in front of him making him extremaly 1/2

“2/2 extremaly guilty and frustrated because being occupied by his own work and life he doesnt even notice struggles of someone who he dearly love and care for. Sorry for such long and detailed request! I hope it doesnt bother you! Thank you so much nad have a great day!”

Busy Schedules - Spencer Reid

masterlist ; request are open

author’s note: hi omg this request came really easy! i really hope this lived up to your expectations @ anon <3 and i hope you all enjoy it! im already working on another request so yay ❤️ i had said 3 fics this summer and this is my fourth one <3 cute!

disclaimer: a bit angsty!! and also talking about like reader not taking care of themselves all that great, like forgetting to eat && reader passes out so if that’s something that upsets you, please do not read it!! GIF NOT MINE

pairing: spencer reid x reader

wordcount: 1,976

You weren’t sure how long it had been since you had last seen your boyfriend, but before the argument that had transpired a few hours ago, you knew that it had been several days since the two of you last spoke. Both of your work schedules took up a large portion of your life and during the beginning of knowing Spencer that was a huge wedge in the two of you actually starting a relationship. But you two later on found out that it didn’t matter how long it took for you two to have time together, because when you did it was like magnets linking together. There was a domestic routine to your very busy lives when you were alone, like adding the final puzzle piece, everything just clicked.

Or it had been, the last few months having a decrease in employees and you having to pick up extra shifts at the hospital, had left you next to no time for yourself. And the time you did have off, Spencer was always away on a case. The last couple of times you were irritable from work, and just missing your boyfriend and it ended with the two of you arguing, it never failed.

You’d end up crying from frustration and exhaustion and Spencer would find himself nursing a bottle of beer with Morgan. Something he never did before, and it was quickly becoming a bit of a habit for him.

Your head was pounding as you woke up, it was eleven pm and your throat felt insanely dry. You looked for a cup of water, but of course there was none. You were never good at looking after yourself. Spencer always told you that and you felt tears well up in your eyes, you missed him so much. The crying mixed with the headache worsened everything you were feeling and you began to feel dizzy. If you were being honest you couldn’t remember the last time you had a proper meal, you had been surviving off granola bars and black coffee. That with working nearly 100 hours a week, it was definitely starting to take a toll on you.

You sat up and realized what had woken you up, there was knocking on your main door. You trudged slowly to your front door, still feeling dizzy as you tried to focus on the figure through the peephole. Even with your vision being blurry you could tell it was Spencer.

You quickly opened the door, which you shouldn’t have feeling the way you were. You felt all your blood rush down and felt a cold shiver run down you. You really needed to get something solid into your system. But with Spencer’s demeanor you could tell you wouldn’t be eating anything for some time, he was tense, eyes burning and you wanted to scream at him. It wasn’t even your fault the two of you were angry.

But you couldn’t even bring yourself to do it, you were so exhausted. You let him in and he brushed past you, pacing through your living room. “Spencer I’m really tired, can we just do this tomorrow? I don’t feel good.”

You knew he didn’t even hear you, he was in his head and from the smell of beer on him you could tell he had been drinking. He wasn’t drunk, but you knew he was a lightweight, so anything he drank would have him more there than here.

You walked towards him, mainly to get him to stop because his pacing was making you feel that the room you were in was spinning. But he moved from you just before you reached him and it caused you to stumble forward, barely catching yourself against the rest of the couch. You had to close your eyes to try and stabilize yourself. “Can you stop trying to push me away?”

“Well you do it, why can’t I?”

He was being childish, you both knew it. “Spencer I’m not doing that, if you feel that way trust me when I say it’s not intentional.”

You muttered something under your breath, you probably shouldn’t have but it slipped from your lips before you could stop yourself. “That’s not fair! I deserve days off with my friends as well!”

“I never said you didn’t, Reid.”

He knew you were angry, you only ever used his last name when you were, but he was angry too and he was glaring at you. “Well then it’s not fair for you to say that I decided to hang out with my friend over you.”

“Did you not? I think it’s been over a month since we’ve seen each other, you see them everyday and we both finally had a night off together and you decided to go out with them, people you see everyday! I feel like I’m not even part of your life anymore.”

Your breathing was labored and rough, you could feel yourself coming in and out of consciousness and could barely focus on the words leaving Spencer’s mouth before everything went black.

Spencer himself did not register what was leaving his mouth as he saw your body going limp, any bit of anger or alcohol leaving his system that very second. He instinctively caught you before your head hit the floor and he was frantically calling out your name. He hated how pale your skin went and how your lips weren’t as red as they normally were. You looked frail and he laid your head on the floor to go look for a cotton ball and rubbing alcohol, when he was looking around your apartment he noticed that the only dirty dishes in your dishwasher were coffee cups and there were scattered granola bar wrappers and nothing else. He sighed through his nose as he realized that’s all you’ve been eating. Much like him, people always said he never took care of himself but he was so good at taking care of you. And he knew you weren’t. He was frustrated at the thought of you two arguing during the little time you had for each other so he decided to go out with Derek and Emily instead. But he quickly realized he shouldn’t have, he really hadn’t seen you in a month, two days, thirteen hours and 54 minutes. And that turned into an argument. He wanted to slip into your apartment while you were asleep, lay down with you and cook you breakfast and have the two of you slip back into your routine. He knew all the frustration and anger was from not seeing each other and now you were passed out on your living room floor and he felt so guilty.

Guilty for not going over after a case, when he really could’ve, guilty for not checking in more. He was your boyfriend and he could’ve been doing more. You were still laying on the floor and he lifted your head onto his lap, brushing the alcohol filled cotton ball under your nose and letting a watery laugh leave his chest as he saw the color come back to you. He was so relieved he was able to wake you up, and since you didn’t hit your head he knew you didn’t need more medical attention. Plus he knew you’d hate it. “Honey, c’mon let me help you into bed.”

“My head feels so heavy.” It was a tiny whimper and Spencer felt his heart ache at how confused your voice was. His hand brushed softly against your cheek, you were colder than he liked for you to be, you sent him a smile, your eyes still closed.

You began to get up and Spencer helped you towards your bedroom, bringing you a cup full of water after he had laid you in bed. He let you slip back into bed as you sunk into the comforters around you. His fingers were lightly brushing through your hair, your face was scrunched up in discomfort and he knew if you didn’t get anything into your system, you’d wake up feeling worse.

He slipped out of your bedroom and walked into your kitchen, he found eggs and bread and decided that this would do. Toasting the bread and spreading butter on it as he waited for the egg to finish cooking. His thoughts causing him to spiral, he still felt so guilty.

As quickly as he could he had everything cooked and was once again walking back towards your bedroom. Your arms were spread out and your hair was in your face, your color fully restored. He left the food on the cabinet by your bed and slipped into bed with you once more, pulling you onto him. Your arms instinctively wrapped themselves around his chest and your face tucked into neck. You stilled in his arms and then quickly pushed yourself away, “Spencer?”

“Who else?” He laughed quietly, but the worry began to set in him to see your confused expression. “Are you okay? Do you remember anything?”

You looked sad and just slumped back into bed, staying close to him but not wrapping yourself around him, “Yes, but I thought it was just a bad dream.”

He took your arms and wrapped them around himself, bringing you in as close as he could as he pressed kisses to your forehead, which you had only just noticed was pounding. “You scared me out there.”

“I didn’t do it on purpose.”

Spencer laughed and began to rub small circles on your back, “What have I told you about making sure you eat breakfast and lunch? What if I wasn’t around and you would’ve hit your head, or you would’ve passed out while driving?”

Spencer’s chest had begun to rise and fall heavily with the prospect of something far worse happening to you if he hadn’t been around, the guilt eating him up.

You grumbled out quietly, “I was going to eat something after letting you in, but you looked upset and I knew we needed to talk.”

You both stayed silent and when you looked up at him, his eyes were already trained on you, he let you speak first. “I am really sorry, I know you deserve to go out with your friends and I obviously know spending time with them outside of work is different than when you’re at work. I was just really tired, the shift was long and I missed you. And I took it out on you and I’m sorry.”

There were tears streaming down your eyes and you wiped them away quickly, “It’s hard having the jobs that we do.”

“I’m sorry too, I think I was still upset about what happened a few days ago and I didn’t want to spend the time that we did have arguing and I opted for going out instead of being here. But I’m still mad at you.”

You laid your head on his chest so you were no longer looking at each other, “You can’t be living off granola bars and coffee.”

“I just forget! I don’t do it on purpose.”

“I know, but for both of our sakes, I need you to sit up and eat.”

You perked you at his words and sat up quickly, causing the room to start spinning again. “Take it easy.”

Before he could reach for the plate you pulled him to you, pressing a few kisses to his lips, “You know I love you right?”

He mumbled quietly against your lips before pressing a kiss to your nose, “I love you too.” He continued to cover your face in soft kisses, only stopping to rub his nose against yours gently, “I missed you.”

“I did too.” He pressed one more kiss to your lips before grabbing the plate, he didn’t let you move from your place until you finished everything.

taglist: @swellwriting @carolinesbookworld @theboywhocriedlupin @awfulmoons @lumos-barnes @fortisfiliae @finnofamerica @beskarjedi @aperrywilliams @ta-ka-shi-ma @spenceluvbot @la-vie-en-amour1 (let me know if you’d like to be added <3)

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x y/n #spencer reid smut #criminal minds smut #criminal minds angst #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds fandom #aaron hotchner #derek morgan

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tigerdrop · 4 years

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dogboy gordon rutting against benreys leg in the same way that benrey did it in the reverse. benrey encouraging him and also making fun of him in the same breath. yummy brain thoughts. i am rotating this

jesus christ i started thinking about dogboy gordon and have not stopped thinking. theres 7k words of dogboy stuff under here im going insane

how in the. help. Help. dog boy. how does he become dogboy. i cant keep giving these idiots potions but i guess thats what ive been reduced to

gman turns him into a dog boy. walks thru a portal and comes out in nintendogs but hes the dog and when he comes back out again hes still a little bit dogy. this is fucking stupid

THE TAIL WAGGING im going to pass away

> i think he would have such fucking issues with the fact that his tail and ears are expressing his emotions so much

trying to act angry towards benrey but hes given away by his tail wagging like crazy......and he never even knows its happening until somebody points it out

it would be cool if. um. he got a little more into roughhousing and rough play afterward. you know. like a . hes already really handsy......physical. . .. .

> okay like the anger turning into somewhat-serious jostling and pushing which turns into roughhousing

its not even horny at first it just gives him the weirdest fucking endorphins. like. its fucking fun man

> and by the time theyre roughhousing his tail is wagging furiously and like thumping on the floor when he gets pinned haha

> YES its about the exhilaration ......he gets this rush from flipping benrey over after he's pinning him, baring his teeth triumphantly

benrey pinning him by his wrists and half-laughing at him like "what the fuck is wrong with you??" and the rest of the science team chimes in like YEAH WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS WHAT WAS THAT

> gordon comes back to himself and turns red immediately and splutters like "i dont know! what - im just - benrey started it!” so like he refuses to do it again but then benrey pushes his buttons and he gets in his face, ears pinned back a bit and shoves him and benreys like oh...so its this again huh...

GOD......PUSHING HIS BUTTONS.......its sooo much fun now that gordons so physically reactive too

> what if he manages to get an honest to god growl out of gordon at one point and it makes something ugly twist in benrey's gut and he wants to make it happen again

and its probably really gratifying for him to see just how often gordons tail wags when gordon looks at him or snorts at one of his jokes

TWO SIDES

> the duality of their relationship....gordons tail wagging just a bit when hes looking at benrey though im

> im thinking about the growling though like...benrey gets fixated on how he fucking sounds, all deep and rumbly and this intensity just focused on benrey only....makes him think about how that would look in other contexts....

> benrey riling him up while their roughousing so he can feel that growl travel through his chest and like...getting gordon to that point makes him SO determined to win the "fight" over benrey hes almost a bit out of his mind with it......pins benrey and subconsciously ruts against him a bit as a sign of dominance....please stop me now goodbye....

NO LITERALLY THATS WHAT I WAS THINKING ABOUT THE MOMENT I STARTED TYPING

prodding gordon further and further and riling him up until gordon pins him to the floor, hard, an arm jammed behind his back and his HEV suit jammed up against benreys ass and rutting subconsciously as gordon. h. gordon. clamps down on the back of his neck and growls

benrey sucks in a rattling gasp and is like "what? ow" in a weirdly shocked yet distanced way

he cant feel where gordons hard b/c of the HEV suit but he can feel the metal awkwardly bumping against his ass Like That. and inwardly benreys on a loop of "what the fuck what the fuck" but not in a bad way in the slightest. just utterly cannot believe this is whats happening, right now, gordon freeman dry humping his ass behind a bunch of crates, not 100 feet from the rest of the science team

> gordon snapping out of it and being like...what the fuck am i doing... or....maybe the gasp makes gordon bite down harder in response...not sure

> gordon not even realizing hes doing it until that moment is so great....i dont know but....maybe he lets go and pushes off benrey, panting and wild eyed, and the image of benrey on his stomach, his bite mark in his neck, is burned into his brain

> he just doesnt say fucking anything and just dips to get jacked off by the suit maybe.... cant stop thinking about how it felt to see benrey with his teeth marks....hates himself for feeling that sick satisfaction in his chest

benrey......touching the back of his neck afterwrds, kind of dream-like, both consciously and subconsciously.......

i like making gordon freeman suffer so i want him to just angrily try to rut against his arm in private later trying desperately to get off thru this stupid busted HEV suit that he cant get out of. pathetic. gordon freeman humping his own fucking arm in a bathroom stall. like a dog

and he thinks about how benrey smelled when he had his teeth clamped on the back of benreys neck, his nose buried right against benreys jaw and neck, smelling the sweat and the hormones and feeling benreys rapid heartbeat, and his whole fucking head throbs with how bad he wants to get off

> and he just cant get off....has to deal with going back the team tense and a bit sweaty and just move on when they ask what happened. benrey doesnt say anything just stares at him and gordon cant meet his eyes. gordon tries not to fucking let benrey get under his skin cause i think hes probably mad upset and embarassed that he reverted to his like,,,more base instincts because of BENREY of all people.....

> but he still thinks about it sometimes and....he tries to distance himself from him but hes still a pretty touchy guy and he find himself around benrey still....laughing at his jokes and getting in his space once in a while. always pulls himself away when he notices but not before he takes in a deep breath of benrey's scent...

> meanwhile benreys trying to think of how to make gordon do that shit again LOL

ohmy god. oh my god.....before this.....before he tries to stop getting in benreys business and before he even recognizes what hes doing.......he like.....hes so touchy feely that he subconsciously tries to mark benrey a lot. like just doing everything in his power to rub the inside of his wrists somewhere on him. even if its barely gonna do anything b/c of the suit. its just instinct

> NOW HE ...now he realizes that he was doing that the whole time..jesus,...

> AUGH....in the buildup before this he didnt realize that he was doing it........but now he realizes he fucking misses doing that shit and kind of berates himself for doing it in the first place....like what the fuck....be Normal gordon...you cant want to fuck him....do you..?

i want him to. grrgohg i dont even know how or why this would happen but i want gordon freeman to lie supine on the ground with his hands up like paws like hes a big pupy looking for tummy rubs OKAY! BYE. I HAVE TO GO. im going to fucking sob why am i like this why is this the cutest possible thing for a man to do. i cant even think of a fucking reason why he would do this so im so fucking embarrassed

i want to fucking. i want to rub his fucking tumy and make him pop a boner from it im literally so sick of this earth

> i was literally Just typing: i just think it would be cool . To pet his tummy and keep telling him "good boy" in a Certain kind of Tone that just totally fucks him up about it . maybe flushed and tongue starting to wanna hang out of his mouth as he goes from laying flat on his back to kinda twisted to one side, breathing heavy, tail thumping hard against the floor cause hes a big dog so that thing is like a lethal weapon

> petting the fuzzy lower belly while hes already hard & needy just to make him whine Very high pitched and desperate-sounding bc its so close to what he wants but that just makes it worse 8)

> What if. Benrey pinning Gordon, maybe scritches behind his ear, as a "joke", he's a dog haha good boy wants ear scritches?? And Gordon immediately squirming and whining. Maybe even kicking his leg just a little bit

> i think it would be cool for a post-black mesa puby gordon pinned benrey to the floor with his whole body weight and humped the life out of benrey's leg while panting and drooling in benrey's ear. a total lack of regard for benrey, (of course he's into it tho) just using him like an object that's conveniently there for him to furiously get off on

> i'm thinking.... this happening after a period of prolonged teasing, like you said. rubbing his tummy and ignoring his dick

> Man ok combined with the suit edging huh? I love that, but i also kinda want gordon to sneak off to get off and discover his uh. k. kn. knot

> he sneaks off and if in this situation he can. idk. get at his dick in a bathroom or whatever. and well, he gets caught up so easily in his 'head empty' instincts mode that when he cums he's kneading that thang for like 2 minutes before he even becomes cognizant enough to notice. and then immediately panic. so idk maybe he cant get at himself for a while, right, so he didnt notice this

> i just think gordon being in the suit would not let him get at his dick and he would only be able to get off in really convoluted ways so like...he wouldnt fucking Know he had a knot he would just feel a weird pressure at the base that he doesnt know what its about. but he starts getting these fantasies of holding benrey down and staying in him when he comes and he doesnt know where the hell thats coming from.....yet. until after everything is over and he can get out of it, and the first time he jacks off again he realizes HOLY FUCK? like what the hell....but it makes sense in retrospect where those fantasies came from. but hes just super embarassed about those fantasies and pushes them down until benrey comes back into his life and activates him again

> in addition to embarassment i think he has a lot of complicated feelings about benrey and definitely feels a guilty about wanting to fuck him into the ground and fill him with cum....but GOD if benrey doesnt get to him just as much as he did in black mesa

> i think that something like this would be so unplanned and shit but like......theyve probably hung out a few times before this or more like maybe benrey has dropped into his house just to annoy him and gordon finds his ears pricking when he hears heavy footsteps around his house cause he recognizes them as benrey's...

> little rush of exhilaration maybe. cause it means they'll spend some time together and he has just all these emotions under his skin when they do. i dont know how this would happen but maybe gordon forgets to keep himself in check when benrey makes him laugh so hard he's snorting and his tail is wagging furiously.benrey tries to touch/catch his tail cause he's kinda curious about it and it never got to mess with it in black mesa. but it turns into roughhousing as gordon shoves him away a little bit but benrey keeps trying to get at it and then get at his ears

> "cmon man just let me touch them whats the big deal-" "NO!" but like hes still laughing a bit until they start really getting into it and he gets breathless and a little irritated at having to roll around and try to pin benrey's hands to the floor

hell on earth......the way his tails wagging and hes grinning and drooling a little once he gets benrey pinned.......

> little triumphant smile when he finally does.....got benrey on his stomach and he's subconsciously rutting against benrey's ass like in black mesa but hes just not noticing while he's berating benrey for losing

> talking right into his ear, and benrey lets out a little gasp when he does a particularly hard thrust and then hes like oh. fuck. he takes in a deep breath and can smell benrey's sweat and realizes hes just as horny about this as he is. cant help but bury his face in the back of his neck and lick. and benrey starts pushing back into him and talking the worst dirty talk and it makes him growl right against his neck and put his teeth there again as a warning not to move but benrey doesnt still, he just keeps talking. so gordon bites down, hard, cutting him off mid sentence with a yelp

f. fucking. benrey......arching his back into it.......pressing his hips up as high as theyll go......the angles bro.....the angles

> also: gordon popping boners more easily, even when he's just platonically excited w/ benrey..... yeah... :)

> like the thing about this is just that he got so excited from the wrasslin that he popped a boner....wasnt even thinking of horny.....

> not until benrey started gasping and arching back into him. then hes immediately aware of how this looks...like hes already basically in the position in his fantasies hes just rutting against him in the imitation of fucking

> gordon getting more frenzied by the little sounds benrey is making as he clamps down on his neck, drool dripping down his chin. benrey braces himself with one hand and gets the other to pull his pants down and then tug on the leg of gordon's down a bit because gordon is kind of. not thinking straight right now. gordon gets the message and fumbles with the buttons to get it down and like. haha i thinnk it would be fun if benrey prepped himself before this and gordon notices like. you really managed to prep urself this time? god, you really wanted this to happen. but maybe benrey had been doing it the last few times cause gordon would get in his space again sometimes and things were tense

NO GOD THIS IS GOOD. LIKE. oh my god gordon just like bitching at him and getting up in his face and Growling a couple times before while his pants are all tented from the inadvertent excitement boners that he doesnt even realize hes having.....and benrey might not be smart but hes not stupid

theres like a 50% chance theyre gonna fuck at any given time he realizes so like. why not......

even if it doesnt work out in the moment benrey still spends the whole time hopped up on the knowledge that they could have, that he was the little fucking pervert who got himself all prepped just in case gordon decided todays the day hes just gonna mount him, and honestly the way he beats his meat and fucks himself afterwards might be nearly as good as the real deal, just from that little bit of self-inflicted degradation

like u said...........he really wanted it to happen

> hhh.... maybe gordon ruts a bit against his ass and benrey guides him in and. he makes a deep growling rumble when he bottoms out. benrey feels it through his chest and gets a full body shiver as he's filled. i dont think hes fully developed his knot yet but its a tight fit. he starts fucking hard and fast into him while open mouthed panting, he cant keep his face away from the benrey's neck, licking up the sweat and burying his face there to breathe in his scent

the fucking . the desperation......every instinct in his body has been telling him to fuck benrey - yes, that benrey, fucking benrey - into the ground for......weeks now? months??

dudes probably tried everything he can think of to overcome it and to think about literally anything else when he gets off but nobody he fucks even comes close to smelling as good as benrey did when gordon had him pinned and gasping and sweating and he could smell the want rolling off him in waves.....and it sucks massive dick and he hates it

> hes been driven crazy by this thought for so long.....cant fucking control himself. wh. what if gordon managed to get a hold of a piece of benrey's clothes that he left and held it up to his face when he let himself jack off to this particular thought so he could get the scent but it jsut wasnt the same without his warm, panting body below him . he always nuts the hardest when he has it though

huffing benreys undershirt and desperately rutting into a pillow on his hands and knees with his ass fully up and hes just utterly debased right now

sad and pathetic gordon freeman humping his pillow like a dog and whining thinking about fucking benrey. if his past self could see himself like this right now he would be disgusted

> !!!!!!!!1 HIM GETTING INTO THE MOUNTING POSITION ON INSTINCT WHEN HE DOES IT...YOUR BRAIN ! i think that gordon would definitely give everything hes got to benrey when he finally gets to fuck him.

> now that hes actually doing it he's just out of his goddamn mind. benrey already being ready for him, slick and hot, just letting him push in .....i think he would definitely go insane

dudes never fucked so hard or so mindlessly in his life......for once all the neuroses just fly out the window. overcome by instinct

> letting out all these whines and moans, not even caring for how loud hes being... benrey's wanted this so fucking bad hes just eating it up, pushing back on him like an animal and getting a power trip that he made gordon this unhinged

thinking about him just being utterly shocked when benrey guides him in and he can just bury himself all the way to the hilt so easily and it makes something in his brain snap

> gordon doesnt even tell benrey when hes close, benrey can just start to feel his knot swell inside him and how it stretches him a bit past what he prepared for...but he wants it in him so fucking bad, he just lets gordon keep fucking into him

like. oh my god. does benrey even know about the knot or is this a brand new and fun surprise for him

> I DONT KNOW......I JUST REALLY LIKE THE THOUGHT OF HIM BEING A BIT CAUGHT OFF GUARD BY IT....

> being caught off guard by it but being so turned on by the feeling of it filling him that he lets out this really high, needy sound. which goes straight to gordon's dick and he just pushes into him harder and jolts his whole body with it. maybe he h....he bites down on the other side of his neck again and thrusts in one more time before coming deep in him. just shuddering from it, eyes squeezed shut and jaw locked around benrey

benrey just fuckin. face down ass up and arching his back as high as he can

(mumbling very quietly) it might be cool also if. gordon maybe.....started growling some things as he got close. a certain something. a word

you know......just......bent over benreys back......arms wrapped around benreys chest and fingers digging into the soft flesh (maybe even his titties, if youre feeling spicy).......pistoning his hips in staccato bursts while he growls.........u bh hhhhh......"mine". over and over not even realizing hes doing it b/c his brain is so fogged out on the sheer delight of rawing benrey after having thought about it non-stop

(mumbling so quietly im speaking at a pitch below the human hearing threshold) benrey hoarsely saying "'m yours, 'm yours" while hes got one hand jammed underneath himself to tug at his dick is the thing that sets gordon off and makes him come, perhaps. perhaps

and gordon just.....slumps over him, leaning his full body weight on him, panting weakly into his ear while his hips subconsciously rut just a little bit, arms still wrapped around benrey but otherwise as useless as a bump on a log while benreys jerking himself off to the wild new feeling of having that knot stretch him open and tug at him every time gordon shifts his hips

gordon nuts and becomes utterly useless but at least his knots still fat as hell so benreys still got something to work with

(sobbing) i just want to see men acting like animals leave me olone..... its about the submission to instinct......the degradation and dehumanization......and also the scent kink its all about the fucking scent kink. its about wanting to huff a guy you pretend you hate like hes a fucking magic marker and its about wanting to make him smell like u

> for scent kink, Gordon's boners due to sweaty benrey hehehehe. this is narsty -> Benrey is like "yeesh that was a lot of exertion" after their first almost-sex wrasslin match, and gets embarassed, so next time he like, wears a bunch of old spice.... but gordon doesn't get as excited. like yeah he can feel him against his back and yeah he's not soft but.. he's not panting or as hard. benrey thinks real hard when he gets home

> CLEAN SWEAT OK ITS A COMBATIBILITY THING OK. IT IS. LOOK UP THE SCIENCE OK I ...walks away. clown shoez

YOU ARE SO FUCKING CORRECT THANK U

> Maybe next time He doesn't bother with the old spice at all, and he gets real into the wrasslin... hell maybe he even uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gets gordon's head under his arm im just saying

I DIDNT WANNA BE THE ONE TO SAY IT BUT NO YEAH THATS COOL. ITS A VERY COOL THOUGHT

think about......dogboy gordon roughhousing and getting pinned down himself and snapping his teeth up at benrey like joking but not joking. you know

they both start just getting really into roughhousing b/c sometimes gordons brain gets Stressed The Fuck Out by all the added stimulation to the senses of being pupy......theres too many sounds and smells sometimes and it makes him even more neurotic and makes him start acting up and getting irritable and trying to start shit until he exerts himself enough to tire his brain out and make it shut up

maybe even like.....in the interim after black mesa but before he runs into benrey again, gordon becomes a fucking hot mess b/c he doesnt know how to deal with it all and the only way he got thru black mesa without his brainstem snapping in half was b/c he and benrey would start shit and start fighting and wrestling and the rest of the science team eventually shrugged and accepted this as a (very weird) part of their life now. he looks like hes one minor inconvenience away from a panic attack and its so sad

any kind of physical exercise would help (he takes up jogging when hes feeling stressed out, which is a lot, and hes gotten some really nice legs by this point) but theres just something different about the roughhousing. its a mental exercise as well as a physical one, so it exhausts his brain more, and unbeknownst to him, he just gets fucking endorphins from the way benrey smells and from being able to mark him with all the up-close physical contact theyre getting. so. hence the wrestling and roughhousing and gordons occasional tendency to just pounce the guy in public and start fighting him with his tail wagging and thumping like crazy

it might be even better if gordon attempts to roughhouse with just about the whole science crew at some point, just for a point of comparison

like.....its usually good, its satisfying, and it wears him out and lets him function like a human being......but theres just something about roughhousing with benrey thats really satisfying and he doesnt have the emotional intelligence to figure out what it is

gordon freeman is an idiot, is what im saying

> tommy indulges him and probably lets him win a few times, coomer soundly wins out every time and bubby probably...loses some before getting pissy LOL. i think that its fun for him to get the most Good Feelings out of roughhousing with benrey.....

AUUUUGHHH WHAT IF HE LICKED BENREYS FACE THO

g gbfbhhh god im obsessed with the way benrey laughs at him and asks "what the fuck is wrong with you?" in the act 3 commentary and thats the exact kind of vibe im feeling from him about like. everything gordon does in pupymode

> Okay, before I go to bed, I shall leave you with a Dog Thought™. Gordon probably wouldn’t be the “best trained” dog in the world because, well, he doesn’t have anyone to make him listen or obey. Heck, given his need to be in control, he probably thinks he’s the leader of the proverbial pack and nobody can tell him what to do. He’d probably slip and do quite a few “rude” and obnoxious dog things, including but not limited to being all over Benrey.

> Trying to goad him into roughhousing. Licking his face. Being in his space to the point that it even starts to make Benrey raise an eyebrow. Inappropriate marking and whatnot. [cough] And what if Benrey--in a weird reversal of the roles we usually give--is stuck with the task of… training Gordon… to behave…

> YOU KNOOOOW. Because pitting alpha dog Gordon against Benrey, who is trying to get him to be “good”...

> … Well, that could be interesting.

> Imagine if you will: Benrey realizing he needs to get Gordon under control. As much as he likes the attention, it's becoming too much. Relentless. Tables have been turned and now he's the one that's a little overwhelmed by the situation because, well, Gordon is running on pure instinct half the time. Making it hard to do things. Making it hard to live his life. Always in his bubble which was, like, fine at first but now he can't do anything without feeling a wet tongue on his face or having Gordon trying to goad him into rough housing.

> He needs so much attention. Has so much energy. It's too much.

> So, he decides he's going to try to "train" Gordon to not... do that. Benrey trying to assert dominance over Gordon, as if he were just a normal dog. Gordon, who has already marked Benrey and decided that Benrey belongs to him does not take to this very well. This is not how the chain of command works. This isn't how the chain of command works at all.

> Benrey, struggling to curb him through praise and admonitions--"good boy," "bad boy," tossing him ~treats~ if he does something right--is now facing off with Gordon, who is both enamored with the attention he's getting but utterly pissed off by the fact Benrey is trying to stop him from doing what he wants.

losing it at the tables being turned and now gordons the annoying fucker getting up in benreys business all the time and never leaving him alone. he deserves this

> They're basically both unmovable objects and unstoppable forces. Benrey is stubborn and isn't going to give up all his sweet PS3 time because Gordon won't stop humping his leg, and Gordon is not going to give up his God given right to make Benrey his property. But Benrey isn't completely averse to the idea of being Gordon's bitch. He just wants to be his bitch on his own terms.

> So, in a surprising show of... well, intelligence on Benrey's behalf, he starts redirecting Gordon's energy towards what HE wants Gordon to do.

> That's how you handle misbehaving dogs anyway. You redirect their energy. That's what all the books on dog training says anyway, and Benrey's inclined to believe it because he's read it in all two books on the subject he casually flipped through.

> So, when Gordon starts getting in his space, he starts redirecting him to touch where he wants touched. "Good boy." When Gordon starts getting a little rough, he purposefully positions himself so he gets the most out of it. "Good boy." When Gordon's licking his face, he starts trying to guide that tongue down to his neck. Feels better there. "Good boy."

> Because he's not a complete idiot. Him and Gordon both know this is sexually charged at this point. And Gordon... Gordon can bend his behaviors a little bit as he's being directed if he still gets to do what he wants (in a way), and Benrey still gets to be fondled by the nerd.

> "But part of the problem is that he is in Benrey's space all the time!" Yeah, but Benrey figured that out, too. You know what shuts up Gordon real fast? Pushing him back down on the other end of the couch and telling him to stay. And if he listens, he slowly, carefully hand feeds Gordon a treat as a reward. Pushing it into his mouth, making sure it goes all the way in. Letting Gordon lick the last bits of taste off of his fingers. He usually sits still after that. "Good boy."

i have a thought thats almost unrelated but im so desperate to give this scenario the proper context

thinking about......gordon getting out of black mesa and hes still dogboy.....and hes attempting to go back to life as normal now that benreys out of his hair for ever but one day his pupy nose catches That Fucking Smell on the air and he realizes that benreys not fucking dead. he thought benrey was fucking dead, b/c he killed him

gordon freeman losing his mind for a solid week or two trying to hunt that smell down (why?? to prove a point?? to try to kill benrey again??? uh huh.) and then when he does hunt benrey down, its like.....well, what was the plan, bud? you found him, and now youre having a staredown outside a 7/11 while benreys frozen halfway through his big gulp

i literally forgot what i was typing b/c dogy gordon tum y rub b gtfhgbb ggfabgbbg

and.....well......he doesnt know exactly what his game plan was, but he does know that benrey cant be trusted as far as u can throw him, and hes not about to let benrey wreak havoc on new mexico if he can help it, so now his new hobby is......tracking benrey across the city to keep an eye on him

and thats how they keep ending up in close proximity

and thats how u start looping in the whole role reversal thing.....suddenly gordons the one that benrey cant shake......hes a bloodhound and hes got the scent

SORRY im SORRY i crave context with the same ferocity that i crave, like, air

and then they start roughhousing when gordon tackles him to the ground one day to stop him from doing.....something......and gordon snaps being to being a normal person so quickly afterwards that its dizzying. turns out a solid 80% of what he really wanted was a sparring buddy

> good afternoon everyone this is not horny in the slightest but i just wanted to say- you know that thing dogs do where they get REALLY excited and playful when you come home from a long day at work? well i’m just thinking about. y’know how benrey has a tendency to just, vanish for a while and come back like nothing happened? think it’d be cute if he were gone for a particularly long stretch of time b4 catching up with the science team again and gordon RESPONDS in his typical annoyed, bratty fashion while his body language is saying something completely different (he still hasn’t mastered the art of puby)

> like, u know, tail wagging a hundred miles a minute, ears perked up and attentive, subconsciously getting all up in benrey’s space

Im going to Cry thats so fucking cute wtf wtf wt ff

still going insane thinking about the “good boy” thing......like...... its all fun and games until hes grappling his best friend benrey and hes got benrey in a headlock and hes plastered against benreys back from head to toe and his tails thumping excitedly against the floor and hes panting hot and harsh right against benreys ear and benrey takes that moment, right there, to choke out "good boy"

its half outright horny and half power play b/c benreys banking that either theyre gonna fuck or gordons gonna let go and be like "what the fuck, man" and then benrey can get the drop on him again

the way gordon just goes stiff after he says it.....breath getting shaky.....dick twitching once against benreys ass and the guy can fucking feel it clear as day......Augh

his tail slows.....and then fires right back up again when he tentatively rocks his hips against benreys ass and feels the sound benrey makes more than he hears it......and like for fucks sake theyve been dancing around how horny their roughhousing sessions are for weeks, this guy deserves to finally get his rocks off by dry humping benreys ass while benreys getting spots in his vision from how tightly gordons got his arm wrapped around his neck. he deserves this

gordons free hand slowly opening up and pressing flat against benreys shirt, then crawling under it so that he can feel the bare skin of his stomach......rocking his hips against the dip between benreys cheeks and whimpering when benrey says it again, breathless and hoarse. "good boy." his tongue poking out to lick a broad, wet stripe up the side of benreys neck to taste the salt and sweat and the hormones, jesus christ, hes never been able to taste if somebodys horny before but its rolling off of him in waves.......and gordons breath comes out so loud and harsh and desperate when benreys leg lifts up a little bit for him to slot his own between them more easily

just mumbling stupid horny shit like "fuck benrey, you taste so good" while his tongue lolls out of his mouth and he licks the curve of benreys ear and rolls benrey onto his stomach b/c something in the back of his brain is whispering to him that it would be a really, really good idea, and hes originally got benrey just crushed flat against the floor with his full body weight but benrey takes a rattling breath and tells him to ease up, get up offa him.....

and gordons confused at this point b/c he was pretty sure this was where this was going, he was being a good boy, but that thought doesnt last very long b/c benreys shuffling into position under him, raising his hips and pushing gordons up with him while his face and torso are flat against the floor, and, Oh. hes. hes doing that. this is what theyre fucking doing now

> gordon taking the collar of benrey’s shirt in his mouth in an crude imitation of scruffing him

every fucking bone in gordons body is telling him to move his hips, fuck benrey stupid, bury himself to the hilt, but he cant do that when theyre both still clothed so he does the next best thing and ruts against benrey like he fucking means it and like if he just tries hard enough, gets enough friction, itll be just like fucking him for real......

hes so dizzied by looping thoughts of he wants this, he wants you to mount him, like youre a filthy fucking animal, arent you? you sick fuck, you wanna mark him and breed him and hed let you, hed beg you for it, look, hes doing it right now and when he comes back down to earth, yeah, benrey is begging right now, isnt he. while hes palming at the front of his sweatpants and whimpering and calling gordon a good boy, attempting to tug his pants down to his knees so gordon can rut against bare flesh, and gordon slows down just enough to let him do it and to fumble open his own zipper to ease some of the agonizing pressure

gordon fumbling his dick out of his underwear to line it up between benreys fat cheeks and god, the feeling of skin against skin is so much fucking better than chafing against his jeans that it makes him growl against benreys neck and benrey cant pump his fucking dick fast enough. hes so encouraging, what with all those little sounds hes making and the way hes arching his back and pressing his hips up as high as theyll go, groaning into the crook of his arm "fuckin, fuck me, bro, j-just like that"

> thinking...... they both get so lost in it, they both can’t hold back long enough to fuck for real. this is too hot, benrey feels something hot and wet on his ass and gordon is curling into him. benrey’s never felt so simultaneous turned on and frustrated that he’s still empty, he’s still gonna have to wait, snd ironically that denial pushes him over too

GOD yes fuckin. coming on his ass b/c gordons so frantic and desperate that he cant wait...... but seeing his cum all over benreys ass is deeply satisfying in its own way. he smears it deep into benreys skin to mark him like that

> oh hey imma be nasty sorry but Gordon all cum-high just sort of manouvering Benrey until he can start licking his cock clean bc he likes to uh. i mean benrey's all wet and you know. he likes it. and benrey comes from that, before he can even think about sucking him off properly

> he doesnt have a thought left in his head at the moment... and can u blame him? so he just uh follows he nose....... and benrey's brain is deleted except for "GORDON FREEMAN ON MY DICK????????" bouncing around like a screensaver yes

> yeah he's not even trying to suck him off really, hes not gotten that far yet cuz hes so cumbrained, gone stupid, etc

im gonna be gross here too okay......and like. fucking. huffing and burying his nose into the crook of benreys thighs b/c he smells so intensely like sex and sweat and it makes gordon lightheaded

> YEAAH maybe he starts licking there before he gets up to his dick. it's not like he's dragging it out really so it's not long but benrey's gaping like a fish. he's trying to say something sorta but he can't get any words out and isn't even sure what he himself is trying to say

maybe he cant help himself and he just starts licking and biting on impulse b/c its your resident fuckin thigh guy here and i think benrey deserves to get em chomped like a drumstick

> and then that's gordon's tongue on his dick, bro and this neurotic mf looking so pleased and blissed out as he sloppily licks him all over is a sight he couldn't have even cooked up in his imagination before now

> benrey not coherently enough to warn him he’s like right there, his babbling incoherently at the tease of gordon’s nose and lips is gonna make him- and then his Tounge darts out and it’s over, the start of the end and he’s spurting all over gordon’s completely surprised face without even being jerked or licked through it

> maybe since gordon's been so stressed and keyed up for so long that benrey coming is a surprise but still doesn't shock him enough to clear the cumbrain, so he licks ben clean after that too, while he's twitching and whimpering etc

> think that benrey massive meat being useless and barely even touched is hip and rad even in the context of him technically being in the higher position of power

> then rests his head on beny's belly for a while, feeling very accomplished and tired. he'll panic later, don't worry

god im still thinking about. pillow humping/voyeurism

gordon freemans a bad fucking dog and sometimes he cant help himself and just starts rutting into a pillow with his ass up and his face buried in one of benreys undershirts while hes just panting and mumbling shit the whole time about benrey, benrey, benrey, why is he so fucking obsessed with benrey and with thinking about mounting him just like hes doing to his poor abused pillow every week

and. you know. maybe one day......benrey kind of.....catches him in the act. i think that would be cool. just coming home one day and cracking open his bedroom door and seeing gordon freeman on all fours, his teeth sunk deep into one pillow and another pillow between his thighs, desperately fucking it while hes groaning benreys name b/c he sure as shit was not expecting him back that early, which is why his cumbrain made him feel confident enough to crawl into benreys bed and roll around in it and mainline benreys scent from his clothes and nut on his pillow (and then feel fucking bad about it and frantically try to clean it off)

and benrey just slooowly steps back with his heart pounding out of his chest for possibly the first time in his whole life b/c he did not think gordon freeman ever wanted to fuck him, but here he is, using benreys pillow as an imitation of the real thing and jerking off in his bed

just turns right the fuck back around and goes into the bathroom and splashes some water on his face and stares down at his sudden boner

THANKS FOR READING ALL OF THIS B/C THIS ISNT EVEN GETTING INTO THE PISS STUFF THAT WEVE OBVIOUSLY BEEN THINKING ABOUT. SORRY FOR BEING LIKE THIS

#asky #writin stuff

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do-you-have-a-flag · 3 years

Text

Destiel shippers come get ya’ll juice!

SO @deadwright and I were inspired by Some Tumblr Posts and the twitter Roadhouse Wedding stuff and keep writing headcanons about Thee Destiel 2021 Married Ever After S16 SPN Romantic Event Of The Season, so here’s that.

Arranged in order of marital chronology and cutting out us keysmashing too much:

oh man imagine all the burgers they get catered for the reception dean got it done himself he would’ve been so particular about the catering bridezilla cas would probably be THEE bitchiest bridezilla

it's also definitely that trope where all the other hunters ect KNOW that that many of them and the wedding party are essentially a target for trouble so everyone spends the 24 hours leading up to the vows taking out every beastie who shows up on a revenge kick out of sight because they'll be damned if they let ANYTHING stop this wedding and Dean and cas are both having their marital jitters oh god im not good enough what if something goes wrong about mundane things while monsters are getting their ass kicked outside AWWWWWWWW for sure for sure, they’re hunter royalty this wedding is a big deal like half the attendees are nursing injuries but grinning widely

they don't do the can't see eachother before the wedding thing because you KNOW dean would be fixing cas' tie last minute

dean wears a blue pocket square to match cas' tie cas wears a FLANNEL SQUARE

I’m obsessed w the idea of cas giving dean a little bit of his grace in a small bottle on a chain for him to wear or like a wing feather or some part of him god the grace in a bottle breaks me every time in fic dean probably builds cas something but every time i try to think of something specific i choke up

i was thinking like what if trading grace is as close to a romantic gesture as angels have and he's like..... technically i left some grace behind in your mark when i dragged you from the pit and dean is like ARE YOU SAYING WE'VE BEEN MARRIED THIS WHOLE TIME?

they are so sweet i’m on the verge of tears the ability to do anything by halves in their relationship was burnt out by like the second return from the dead moment they are too insane to be anything less than All In And Then Some

at one point someone was like hey cas do you want to run your vows by someone as practice? and he started reading what he'd prepared and it devolved into Biblically Grand Statements Of The Power Of Love And The Redemption Of - ect ect ect and it's because unlike the confession scene he's had TOO much preparation and overshot into uncanny angelic vibes he makes some edits because he know the expressions he gets when he reads it aren't what he intended

dean writes page after page after page of unused drafts, none of them are particularly floral

he does the cliche of ripping up his vows and improvising at the altar, something he gets mercilessly teased for because he swore he wouldn't but it classifies as a chick flick moment

THAT’S SO PEAK HIM OH MY GOD and you knoooooow you just KNOW it’s beautiful and emotional and everyone is crying

god the NOVELTY of dean being emotionally honest in front of people......im gonna faint YEA yeah... ONE TIME ONLY DEAL he thinks loudly at Sam's smug expression

anyway, at the wedding dean is the one who spends the whole ceremony with like crying cat meme eyes after the confession scene i’m pretty sure the minute the vows start cas is in the same boat USELESS HUSBANDS dean gets passed a handkerchief for his tears and immediately goes to use it on cas' face and they both laugh sob love the idea that everyone individually thought they were too tough to cry but they all broke at various stages yeah sam definitely starts to choke up just standing up there with his brother sam chokes up before the ceremony even started, like probably when he was pinning on dean’s corsage

anyway, Jack dancing with his two dads at the reception CAS’ BEST MAN / FLOWER BOY FLOWER MAN let him heelie down the aisle with the flowers LITTLE MAN GO NYOOM who makes him a little flower crown he wears with a proud lil smile? claire ofc, with those hair braiding skills? she makes it BEAUTIFUL flower crown: on nails: painted dads: MARRIED!!!!

when they say i do and kiss and everyone is cheering you can't convince me that someone doesn't let off what is either a gun or a dubiously legal firework in celebration jack pops a few lightbulbs in his uncontrollable joy

Dean and Cas can't let go of each other, it's at LEAST one point of physical contact for the rest of the reception PERIODT

CAN YOU IMAGINE THEM DANCING TO AIR SUPPLY

they definitely didn't do the wedding gifts thing but a few mysteriously show up anyway; discuss waffle iron from sam bc he remembers the becky incident meanwhile claire gets them flavoured lube because she’s an insane little mean girl she gets them a sampler package with like novelty flavours, gotta spring extra for a wedding PIE FLAVOURED LUBE

it’s gonna be the party of the century omfg you KNOW it! that dancefloor going OFF the BAR is FLOWING

dean gets dragged up onto the bar to make a speech and there's a moment at the end where he drags cas up there too and they're being playfully yelled at not to scuff it and there's hooting and catcalls as dean and cas kiss and dean gestures rudely before almost falling backwards off the bar before cas grabs him and climbing down is less romantic or dignified but he couldn't care if he wanted to

meanwhile sam and claire are outside defacing the impala with silly string and lewd graffiti and tin cans tied to the bumper for the going-away oh it is one hundo percent a just married atrocity there's enough condoms hidden in the car that they're still finding them months later

anyway wanna hear my disgustingly soppy honeymoon roadtrip concept? YOU KNOW I DO OKAY SO

you know at some point dean must have said some sad thing like for the longest time he never thought he'd live long enough to get married and the only circumstances he could imagine was hooking up drunkenly with a stranger at some vegas wedding scenario like that's the best he would ever get and he thinks it's mostly forgotten but then during their cross country honeymoon roadtrip castiel does in fact navigate them to las vegas and quietly mutters that the legal veracity of the little chapel on the city limits is dubious at best and they're already married so it couldn't do any harm and they get officiated by an elvis impersonator and a woman wearing more sequins than fabric throws cheap confetti over them

and after that they stop into every venue they can find that would be friendly to them to pretend they're eloping and at one point dean even pulls out the fbi id badges and the officiant is under the impression he's facilitating some sort of covert workplace romance

one place is a kitchy little house that's clearly just the couple who run it opening their strange home to anyone who needs it and have been since the 70s and Castiel thinks for a moment when they're asked to pin something to the collection of stuff on the walls and ceiling before pulling the receipt for the pie they'd shared earlier in a dinner out and scrawling his and dean's name on it to be added to the clutter

and at one point they stand ankle deep in a pond while some old hippie lady wraps their clasped hands together with soft fabric and chants something that dean knows isn't real magic but hey he's not going to tell her that and after the ceremony they sit on the grass and feed each other sweet bread to complete the binding or whatever and it's nice but it doesn't compare to the ranch where they both tossed their cowboy hats in the air and were given a horse to ride to their camp site

i thought about riverboat gambling for point one seconds and now i know in my bones that one of their many weddings was on a riverboat, they made the captain officiate after cornering him on deck in like five minutes, the crew sent them complimentary champagne and they threw fries at the birds following the boat while sharing it straight out of the bottle

if destiel can go canon multiple times they can get married multiple times CHANGE MY MIND THEY GET MARRIED SO MUCH the MOST married i just want them to get gay cowboy married

eventually i want them to end up at the beach bc dean has canonically never been to the coast their road trip is to get to the other coast

they send just married postcards back to sam from every stop sam stops feeling hurt he was left out of their vegas elopement wedding by the third wedding postcard he recieves sam saves them ofc bc GOD can you imagine them looking at the postcards on their 30th anniversary or s/t 🥺 showing their grandkids and recounting the story of each wedding there's a seashell taped to the last one

cas gets a terrible sunglasses tan and dean gets burnt on the tips of his ears and there's sand on sand on sand in all their clothes and at one point dean is blinking away salt water and cas is gripping his arm and saying something about the coral by them in the water and dean thinks that he likes floating beside cas a lot better than flying

dean has cas pick ice cream for them from a truck and hustles at carnival games enough to win them both big novelty foam hats and they both go back to their room and pass out immediately post shower sprawled across the bed and still smelling like sunscreen and salt water

dean tucks a little cocktail umbrella behind cas’ ear

cas spends most of the next day in dean's zepplin shirt and a pair of shorts they only picked up once they got there because neither of them thought to bring beach clothes, they sit on the balcony and dean sips his beer and idly plays with the ring on cas' finger and they play a game of what fictional monsters could they beat in a fight

cas’ true form is the size of the chrysler building he can fight king kong easy that's what he says and dean's like okay but what about mothra and castiel is like how would YOU defeat mothra and dean just goes "bugspray." GDJSGSHSGSHDSJ DEAN WOULD

in honour of misha putting his whole pussy into the role, cas wears a dress in at least one of their weddings

it's at one of those theme parks that's just historical re-enactments and people get their vows renewed there and there's costumes for the photobooth and the staff are like how long have you been married? castiel says two weeks, three days, eighteen hours, and twenty five minutes................ approximately. and the photo is cas in a classical wedding gown and dean is wearing the veil with his old timey suit and there's a moose head on the wall behind them wearing the top hat he was given and they send that print with an arrow pointing at the moose with sam written next to it

i keep thinking bitch!!!! you KNOW WHAT!! you KNOW that dean is the type a guy who's heart races every time he feels his wedding ring/is always fiddling with it in the weeks after the wedding, like an anchor to remind him they really got married this is real he would NEED that physical reminder that he can have good things

he’s never ever going to take it off, the tan line will be permanent

how funny it would be if dean gets injured on a hunt and the monster guy is about to kill him and then the lights blow out and the monsters are like what was that and dean is just like "[spits blood] that's my husband." and nek minnit cas has just ripped through them thanks to teleporting in angel style and is just like Cas: [heals dean] "you're late for movie night" Dean: "Well if you'd gotten here earlier i would have been on time." Cas: >:| [kisses him]

cas is like i didn’t burn the popcorn this time you BETTER be alive to see it

#destiel #supernatural #long post #supernatural season 16 #twitter roadhouse wedding about to pop OFF #destiel wedding #deancas

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fizzingwizard · 3 years

Text

rant im really angry.

and you know what the most annoying part of it is??? that i probably will go visit his house

it’s family, I can’t say no. family > politics, that’s how it’s supposed to be

and yet it’s so fucking messed up all the time, and he only believes family > politics is a thing he supports. really it’s he expects the rest of us to put family first so he can continue to do whatever he wants and never examine anything.

the fact that many family and friends have called it quits with him doesnt prove to him that he’s been putting politics over family - it proves to him that those people picked politics over family.

even though those people ALL made multiple generous attempts to find a middle ground or even to put an embargo on talking about politics at all so that we could all remain friends.

me and my mom field SO MANY random messages, sometimes from people we barely hear from, about things my dad said to them that confused and offended them and they want to know what to do or at least apologize for the fact that they’re not going to interact with him anymore.

I lit advise people “just ignore him, block him, there is no point in engaging with him.”

and it’s so hard to explain. I think when you try to write about someone’s Facebook abuse it seems like it’s not a big deal. but I don’t know how to express how NON STOP it is. and it’s not just online, he does the same thing IRL, the trouble is he’s driven most everyone away so now the only way he can interact with others is online and that’s where the majority of it happens.

but I am not extended family or friend, I’m intimate family, it is much harder for me to not interact with him.

some people say “cut toxic people out of your life” like it’s just that easy but if I told you “I stopped all contact with my dad because of his facebook posts” you’d just call me a special snowflake wouldn’t you.

also it would leave my mom pretty much on her own. they are separated, you would think she wouldn’t be helping him all the time, but she is.

we have lots of memories is why from times when things werent this fucking insane every single day

and my brother. i get to hear all the time from my mom how terrible his life has been and how she is so understanding of all he’s been through. he’s accepted all sorts of help from my parents over the years, even after behaving honest to god worse than my dad for most of his twenties, even getting violent at times. and he expects all kinds of apologies from the people who have hurt him but guess how many apologies he’s had for those of us who he hurt. but we’re “family” i guess we’re just supposed to know without being told because family > bad behavior

honestly I do understand most of why my brother feels the way he does (currently, not so much in the past) and it isn’t his fault that he’s able to just ignore my dad’s existence and my mom and i arent

i get to feeling like he and my dad just take what they want from “family” and leave what they dont want but expect me and my mom to keep everything together.

bro may be ok with it if dad’s not in the picture but i wonder if he’d feel the same if mom had been like “peace out” when he was treating her so fucking terribly

and i do not excuse him for being young. he was in his twenties by then. in his twenties and screaming at his mom so much that she ran crying out of his room down the hall. sorry thats not okay.

but she has forgiven him because family is most important to her and she is happy to see him back on his feet and doing much better now.

and normally i feel the same and i know all my feelings here are not completely fair. my bro for instance is not responsible in any way for all the batshit stuff my dad does. it’s just so easy to conflate how he acted with how my dad acts because they both just move on whenever they feel like it and my mom and i are left cleaning up the mess and expected to pretend it never happened so we dont rock the boat.

its FRUSTRATING but i feel like no one cares that its frustrating. not even mom. because to her it really really really is family > all else.

which makes it more difficult for me to be like “i love my family but i dont want to see you.”

because i will be The Bad Guy. If i do that, it will be counted as sooooooo much worse than anything my dad or bro have ever done. none of my reasons will ever be good enough

fuck i went through crap growing up too. i dont know if it’s as bad as what my brother went through. maybe it wasnt. but even if it wasnt does that mean i have no reason to be angry sometimes too?

and ive been told my bro thinks my life is easy because i got good grades and didnt drop out and have never been diagnosed with any mental illness and yknow fuck maybe it is. i still worked damn hard in school and i still got bullied and sometimes didnt have a single friend and was misunderstood and had my heartbroken. im never going to say my brothers or my dads mental illness dont exist because that would be terrible and undermine all the hard work they have done to live with it. but i cant help that i dont appreciate being told all my hard work just to get by doesnt count because i havent suffered enough.

sorry i didnt win the suffering lottery. i have been there for my family the whole time. even tho it meant i had to watch my dad and bro be seriously awful to my mom while all she ever did was desperately try to support them. ive bitten my tongue and pretended not to care about things i care about in order to not rock the boat, only for my dad to whine about how my generation is so fucking oversensitive

dad you have NEVER bitten your tongue as hard as i do every day.

i stopped going home from college whenever i could manage it because of you two. because going home sucked.

and yet my family seems to think im the one person who still thinks everything is okay and felt like i was surprised when my parents separated because of that, when really i was surprised because id been expecting my mom to do it years ago and since she never did I thought she never would.

lol dont rely on me to be the innocent always happy one, i would stop being that in a heartbeat if i thought i could get away with the way YOU do

i will delete this later

eta: the thing is when your family is dysfunctional you dont know it growing up. and then one day youre grown yourself and you have to make decisions about your future and you start thinking why would i want that. im better off without that. no family is perfectly happy so why should i expect i will be able to escape the dysfunction i grew up with

i make sooo many decisions from a basis of “will i be able to easily escape from here?”

#personal

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silveryfairy · 3 years

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hey man if it's not too much trouble, could you give us a brief rundown of the Nocturnes? It's just, every morning I wake up and there's a new one, and I Care everyone in this establishment a lot though I don't really know them, thank you kindly have a nice day

let my preface this by saying: aayushi, i love you, and your enthusiasm and interest for the things i create never ceases to bring me joy. you are the kind of friend i think everyone should have and i say that completely genuinely outside of this bit.

i say that as an apology in advance for what i’m about to unleash upon you, because what you’re going to see is the product of my friend @himepapillon and i’s absolute BRAINROT and what comes of it when not only two people make an oc universe from scratch but what happens when we then have to explain that universe to other people

you are in no way required to retain this information as to be completely honest me and jeremie haven’t fully either and we’re the ones who MADE this shitshow. below is the shoddy family tree i lovingly crafted in ms paint

let us begin.

for starters, i’ll specify some things:

1. not every oc on this chart is mine, as it’s a collaboration between me and jeremie - the koenig family and bishop family belong to faer but the rest is all me baby! for the sake of your soul i will only be going into my half of this Mess

2. the universe this takes place in is a pretty wacky and silly one, just, like, Slightly removed from reality. these characters are all completely batshit insane and do things that no human being probably should. it’s all portrayed critically, as the general concept of this whole thing is “the goings-on of a bunch of unhinged corrupt rich people”. we kind of flip flop on how seriously stuff is played but if i had to slap a genre on this it’d be, like, black comedy drama. i know a lot of these concepts sound kinda fucked to write but that’s just because i’m trying to describe them in a SOMEWHAT concise way without going into Super Introspective mode

the nocturnes are an incredibly influential and rich family in the uk that tends to produce very influential and rich people. they’re also all a little bit insane. the main characters of this Saga are the sons of desmond and xanthes, the family’s resident Power Couple and biggest figureheads. they suck ass but that will become apparent the second i talk about their children.

from oldest to youngest, the nocturne boys are:

ichor nocturne, 25 - the eldest, ichor was disowned from the household when he was 18 for unruly behavior, sent to live alone on a farm so he couldn’t tarnish his family’s image any further. since then, you’d think the isolation has driven him a bit mad - he’s a very prolific cotton farmer and has been doing astonishingly well for himself, running his farm on his own with only his parents’ inheritance as help. ...that, and, of course, the blood of the people he executes to keep his crops growing - or so he believes. he moonlights as an executioner in the small town over, exterminating the ‘pests’ of the city. despite his newfound violence, he still routinely checks in on his siblings, finding ways to mysteriously end up at their door to pay visits. the older brother instinct still hasn’t left

icarus nocturne, 23 - the second eldest (only by technicality, as he is a twin), icarus is the family’s golden child! but not in terms of business or anything, oh no - icarus is a famous heartthrob teen (sorta) musician! he’s been in the limelight since he was a little boy, being an actor as a small child and getting into music as he grew. his general Look(tm), accompanied by infectiously happy rave music, is a trademark cutesy mask over his face with oversized clothing - meant to express as much energy as possible as he bounces about the stage. in reality, he lives a life as forced and controlled as possible by virtue of... living the fucked up life of a child star. but his parents have someone to take the fall - so, what of his twin?

achilles nocturne, 23 - icarus’ younger twin, which wouldn’t mean much... in any family but this one. achilles has had it drilled into his head since the beginning that he was a mistake next to icarus, to the point where legally, he does not exist. following icarus beginning his career, achilles was unpersoned completely - living in the family’s basement with the height of his education being for a very specific purpose... needing to be icarus’ body double on tours and for paparazzi - after all, they can’t have icarus’ purity tainted by all those clamboring fans! it’s a godawful situation. on the bright side, though, achilles has found a hobby where he can be himself: twitch streaming! yes really. under the name of 1upanonymous, hidden under a mask just like his brother, achilles at least has a fanbase that can love him for who he is! ...uh, kind of.

tomasine “tommy” nocturne, 16 - the youngest of the bunch, and it says a lot about his siblings’ capabilities that he’s the technical heir to the nocturnes’ various businesses and fortune. tommy is just a feral 16 year old that doesn’t give two shits about any fame or fortune, he just wants to party and drink and have fun like any other kid his age! he’s rebellious, loud, and charmingly annoying (to his brothers anyway), and has no real care for the gravity of his family’s situations beyond finding it annoying that they want him to be all PRIM and PROPER and BUSINESSY EEWWWWW. he’s just a funny loud little child trying to live his best life. loves his brothers fiercely

already a mess of people. and really, all you need to know about or really keep in mind are those four: the upcoming characters are largely just side ones we came up with because we thought it’d be funny to flesh out this fucked up family more. so let’s get into the anatra branch of the family - headed by jael nocturne, xanthes’ brother and the siblings’ uncle

jael anatra-nocturne, who i am not giving an age for my own sanity trying to decipher this fucking timeline - a crude and playful uncle, jael is someone the nocturne boys either love (icarus, tommy) or hate (achilles, ichor). constantly joking, as he expresses affection with loving insults - kind of a money-driven asshole, but a lovable one - he’s a career politician and met his current husband, joaquin, on the job. or, well... no longer current, because jael’s funny life of debauchery, toxic masculinity, and making fun of his nephews, came to an abrupt end when he was assassinated on live television. yipes!

joaquin anatra-nocturne, who also does not get an age - jael’s former secretary and current widow, joaquin is the local wine uncle. im not sure if that’s a classification but it is now, because he is one. an unapologetic gold-digger, he (publicly) took jael’s death frighteningly well, and is now living his best life with a revolving door of new boyfriends. his relationship with jael was a genuine and very loving one, and joaquin IS devastated by his death, but both of them just found the bit of pretending to be this loveless gold digger/politician couple very funny, and being as suspicious as possible around his husband’s death is exactly what jael would have wanted joaquin to do

taddeo anatra-nocturne, 14 - the youngest child of these two, a shy little boy with big Child In A Horror Movie energies. makes potions in the backyard and probably decorates his clothes with animal bones n stuff when he’s older. despite this he’s pretty harmless, nice and fiercely loyal - tommy especially thinks he’s fun and likes to hang out with him at family gatherings - just so long as you look past the creepy dolls he likes to talk to and fires he likes to set. especially close with jael and wants to be a miniature version of him, buuut still being a shy tween taddeo hasn’t been able to act on that much.

dailon anatra-nocturne, 20 - the adopted second child of jael and joaquin, dailon is a moody and unstable delinquent that was snatched up by them just as he was about to age out of foster care. while he has a chill ‘cool-older-even-though-he’s-younger-cousin’ demeanor, the tension when he’s around his parents - jael specifically - can be cut with a knife. dailon hates his dad: ‘someone who expresses affection with insults and jokes and likes seeing people pissed at him’ and ‘someone who’s volatile, short-tempered, and sullen after living in a foster home most his life’ are just as bad of a combination as you’d expect. dailon gets himself into a lot of trouble, and is an overall very self-centered prick, but we’ll get more on that in a bit.

HELL FAMILY...2!!! that’s the last of the families to cover, buuuut there are still some other names on that list - mostly connected to dailon. this is REAL “just going on in the background” shit that you also do not need to know whatsoever (except for mitzi she’s pretty important she’s just down here for organization purposes) - i just like to play god and make characters get into drama.

[tw: cheating, unhealthy relationships, stalking]

mitzi “moon” altberg, 23 - achilles must feel very far away by now, but we’re back to him for a second! mitzi is his ex-girlfriend he met online, a fan-to-employee-to-lover and one of the maybe two people outside of the family achilles has shown his real face to. however, achilles growing up deeply unstable - between his parents’ abuse, having spotlights on him and adoring fans both as icarus’ body double and as a streamer, and in general not really growing up to be any kind of well developed human being - made this relationship a complete disaster. he grew obsessive and controlling - and when she tried to ignore him, he broke his one rule (to never go outside without permission) to find the hotel she was staying at in real life and show up to confront her. the incident was completely covered up, both by the nocturnes and with their connections, and so mitzi was forced to stay silent. this entire thing is based on this song! as time heals wounds, though, mitzi will end up doing pretty well for herself and putting achilles behind her - even getting a new boyfriend, jared!

reynard fiala, 20 - dailon’s (ex-)boyfriend, who he’s enraveled in his own weird soap opera subplot with. reynard is a relatively chill person, with an interest in art and taxidermy - just as morbid as dailon’s brother, but in a more. Normal way. genuinely a sweetheart who does not deserve what happens to them: getting cheated on with dailon’s best friend. yipes^2! while it's earth shattering in the moment, all reynard will really want to do come some time to process is to move on and for him and dailon both to heal in peace... far away from eachother (which is easier said than done since taddeo thinks reynard is super cool and loves having him over, the awkwardness between them and his brother be damned)

jared summers, 21 - the most normal person here. a longterm best friend of dailon’s, and yes, the very same one i just mentioned. he’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer - what we in the industry would call a himbo if his dumbassery didn’t cause very real damage - who had been pining for dailon for years and him dating was no deterrent, and dailon, thinking the world revolves around him as he tends to do, accepted jared’s confession so they just kinda started dating on the side. jared has the moral backbone of a pool noodle, and even after it causes dailon’s relationship with reynard to fall apart, will need a wholeass intervention to be staged to make them both realize just how shitty they’re being. after that, though, jared will end that mess and be on his way to becoming a better person himself - with the help of a sweet girl he’s met online.

jared and mitzi dating in the future is the most contrived thing on the planet but just hear me out that it’ll be HILARIOUS for achilles to check in on his ex-girlfriend and find she’s dating his cousin’s best friend, who said cousin was apparently dating on the side. very small world, it is.

anyway, thank you if you’ve somehow stuck around to read this entire thing - this isn’t even getting into jeremie’s half of this whole ordeal, which includes some of these fellas’ friends and partners, as well as more crazy rich people nonsense. it’s been very fun to think about and i do love it all dearly, even if putting it all together it’s SUCH a mess.

we don’t intend to make anything Legit out of this, it’s honestly just a fun way to pass the time. it’s the adult equivalent of playing dollhouse. in our minds this is like a 20 season soap opera but actually explaining it to other people it’s just like this

but thank you again for letting me babble i hope it was somewhat entertaining! and again, godspeed if you managed to read this much XD

#nocturnes #ichor nocturne #icarus nocturne #achilles nocturne #tommy nocturne #jael anatra nocturne #joaquin anatra nocturne #taddeo anatra nocturne #dailon anatra nocturne #mitzi moon #jared summers #reynard fiala

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dessarious · 5 years

Text

Broken Harmony Pt7

Master List 1 Master List 2 Prologue Beginning Previous Next

Damian was on edge and as soon as Sabine hit play he felt a countdown start. Marinette was trying to look everywhere at once. Well everywhere except at her parents. As he watched them though he noticed Tom’s face get continually redder and Sabine’s expression turned harder. When she set down the phone he held his breath.

“Tom.” She touched his hand to get his attention and he started before meeting her eyes. “If any of them come into the bakery you can chase them out with a rolling pin.” He blinked down at her, his face losing some of the extra color, before he burst out laughing. Damian shared a look with Bruce both thoroughly confused.

“I won’t even make it out of the kitchen before you freeze them out with one look.” They were both laughing, barely able to breathe. Marinette’s relief practically pulsed at him though her song. She finally seemed to sense his confusion and gave a sympathetic smile before trying to explain.

“When all your negative emotions can be taken advantage of by a magical terrorist you find interesting coping mechanisms. Maman and Papa have taken to using humor to make sure their emotions are never dark long enough to attract an Akuma.” She still eyed them warily. “I just hope it keeps working.”

“Marinette.” She straightened up at her mother’s voice, he and his father did as well to be honest. “How long has this been going on?”

“Nothing like that happened before today.” Sabine raised an eyebrow at her and she visibly wilted, looking away. “They completely turned on me about six months ago.” The words were barely audible but with no other sound in the room they all heard them clearly. Tom looked devastated. Sabine reached over and pulled her daughter into a hug. Damian noticed she was careful not to move too fast or hold too tight.

“Right around the time Monsieur Fu passed?” His Angel just nodded into Sabine’s shoulder. “And we assumed all the changes were caused by that. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault Maman. I didn’t want you to worry and I thought I could handle it.” Her guilt and shame threatened to overwhelm Damian. Luckily his father didn’t have that problem.

“Monsieur Fu?” It was Tom who answered Bruce’s query.

“Monsieur Fu worked at a local massage parlor and also did classes in meditation and other forms of stress relief. Marinette was six the first time he came into the bakery and the two just bonded instantly. He always said my baby was the granddaughter he never had.” He smiled at the memory before sighing. “He passed away in a gas explosion. Mari was there with him at the time.”

Damian was certain he could pinpoint the exact moment it had happened. He’d felt her panic, then her despair, and then came the numbness. It was as if she was completely devoid of feelings. Three days later they’d come back with a vengeance. The most prominent being a feeling of betrayal.

“It was three days after the explosion that her class turned on her.” All the adults looked at him with almost identical expressions of confusion. “That’s when her song changed so drastically that I knew I had to find her.”

“Wait, you’ve been looking for our daughter?” Sabine’s question was directed at Bruce who shook his head.

“Damian has been, I haven’t. I didn’t even know he had a soulmate until today because someone never bothered to tell me.” Damian rolled his eyes and heard his Angel giggle from her mother’s arms. Tom and Sabine both just looked confused. They were the same age so Damian had to have shown signs of having a soulmate as a child.

“I lived with my mother until I was ten. My Father didn’t even know I existed until that point.” He was trying to stop Marinette’s parents from glaring at his father. “My mother thought the bond was a distraction and forbid me from mentioning it. It just became a habit not to bring it up I guess.” Now they were both looking at him with pity written all over their faces. Maybe it would have been better to let them be angry at his father.

Suddenly his arms were full of his soulmate. She was hugging him tightly and her song was like a warm blanket being draped over him. He still had no clue what to do with his hands though and ended up settling them awkwardly on the small of her back. Rather than helping the adults just smiled fondly at him. His father, traitor that he was, actually pulled out his phone and took a picture. A minute later his phone buzzed in his pocket, signaling that the rest of his family had received the picture.

“That really wasn’t necessary.” Damian’s tone was dry but held a bite to it.

“They’re all already going insane at the fact you even have a soulmate. I had to show proof.” Damian just glared at him. “Besides your brothers will be here tomorrow and this way they’ll get some of it out of their systems before they actually meet her.”

“Why?” There was so much more to that question but it was all he could get out through gritted teeth.

“First because Paris is more dangerous than we thought.” So his father had been learning about that situation here as well. “Second because I know you and you’re not leaving Paris while she’s here. That means someone has to stay here with you for the foreseeable future since you are still a minor. Since I don’t have the luxury of staying one of your brother’s will have to.”

“Drake then. He’s the least annoying and most useful.” Especially given the video and text messages to Marinette’s phone. His father just raised an eyebrow at him.

“We’ll discuss it once they get here. Right now it might be better to discuss what to do about Marinette’s situation. Preferably before the police arrive since they’re probably going to ask if you want to press charges.” Bruce held up her phone and Marinette looked like she’d been slapped.

“I don’t… I can’t… they didn’t mean anything by it.” Damian could tell the words came out as a reflex more than anything else. Even she didn’t believe them but she was still holding on to the way things used to be. He took her face in his hands gently and made her look at him.

“Angel.” Her parents actually awed at the nickname but he was focused on her. “You already agreed to let the doctor send the video and your medical chart to the police. They hurt you. They could have killed you with one well placed kick. I only saw some of those messages but not one of them was an apology for their actions. This isn’t just some nasty words anymore. They need to know what they did was wrong and you need to do whatever it takes for you to be safe. Please.” He had been the Prince of the Assassins League. He was Robin. He had never pleaded before in his life. He was pleading with her now.

She simply stared back at him. Her song was humming in her concentration but he couldn’t get a good read on her emotions. Damian knew she was looking for something in his eyes or his song and he had no idea what it was. Everything in him, all his training even, was screaming at him to just take her somewhere safe. To ignore what she wanted and just do what was necessary. Instead, he sat there and waited for her answer and he knew he’d abide by her decision. No matter how much he might disagree with it.

Then she smiled at him. It was relieved, joyous, and proud all at once matching the song that suddenly crescendoed in his head. He had absolutely no idea what it meant.

“Okay.” He just blinked at her in confusion.

“Okay what?”

“I’ll cooperate with the police and I’ll find a different school.” He felt a tightness leave his chest that he didn’t even realize was there. Without conscious thought he leaned forward and placed a kiss on her forehead.

“Thank you.”

Master List 1 Master List 2 Prologue Beginning Previous Next

Tag list for Broken Harmony

Thanks for all the positive responses! Here’s the tag list I’ve go so far. If I missed anyone let me know.

@crazylittlemunchkin @iggy-of-fans @captainmac6 @shizukiryuu @origami-dreams @yamadochie @drama-queen-supreme @miraculousbelladonna @mjisntme @zebrabaker @driftingmoonlitpetals @slytherinhquinn @politelyvicious @mystery-5-5 @constancetruggle @synnesstra @im-here-for-the-content @slytherinsheashire @myriad-of-passionate-pettiness @cyborgcandy @rhub4rb @satans-favorite-homo @beautym3 @ayuchan07 @zalladane @moonlitarchangels @mooshoon @mindfulmagics @saphiraazure2708 @chrismarium @worlds-tiniest-spook-pastry @tog84

Beginning Previous Next

#maribat #maridami #damimari #marinette dupen chang #damian wayne

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leftenant-sinani · 4 years

Text

Tales from Grudgewill - Love of Our Lord Chapter 1

For some time now... i was thinking that maybe i should send my newest piece here. “Love of Our Lord”. Its basically a story about Lord Valnin (Not Uy-Mal Dzerma but Trildyn, because its alternate universe) dealing with his most recent problems like diplomacy, plague or love. The universe ive created is called “Grudgewill”, a fantasy universe based on Elder Scrolls, WarCraft, Dragon Age and perhaps a little on Warhammer Fantasy. I will send details about it later, but for now.. heres this little FanFiction ive made. This is just first chapter, i have second ready and im working on the third one, its going to be a long way. And i want to thank @avengercommander and @witharsenicsauce for inspiring me to do this, for helping me with writing and also for being very good friends, i cannot thank them enough for either. Anyway, i hope you will like it. ;)

Note : Almost all of the Valnin's lovers are characters taken from other games, most importantly Mass Effect : Andromeda and XCOM 2 : War of The Chosen, you can Google them, so you will know how they at least look like, for the Trio of Masters, Google up XCOM 2 Chosen. As for the Valnin himself, just Google up a Dark Elf from Elder Scrolls series, if you want some picture in particular, he would look like this most probably : cdnb.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/016/494/335/large/shamine-king-portrait-practice-adana-02-da.jpg?1552379572, Art by Shamine King And i know this is a huge crossover thing, and in my official lore this will not be a thing, but hey, i started this story when i was drunk and i want to finish it, so i don't care anymore. smileyface Also, please excuse the grammar mistakes, english is not my first language, but i am trying my best.

Chapter I : First Things First

Lord Valnin was in difficult situation right now. He had no idea what to do first. The two other rulers of Icestand required his help with the plague in their regions, half of his army was demoralized because of this undead menace that was coming from the South, and there was also this most difficult choice, he would have to make... to choose one of his loyal companions, who would share their life with him until the very end of all things, despite the sad fact most of them will not live as long as Valnin. The Lord dropped into his chair, thinking about what to do, but all he wanted, was peace and quiet for at least a day or two. His blood red eyes focused on the rise of sun, its beams already touching Valnin's light blue skin. "Sometimes... I wish I didn't accept Watcher's offer. It surely would be easier than having to rule a kingdom" He said quietly to himself, so no one would hear him. As he continued to watch the dawn, his mind came with an idea after a minute. "First things first, I have to deal with this little love problem. After all, it's the closest problem I have here" He told himself quietly again. But then he frowned a little, as he was thinking about who to take. He couldn't think of who to choose. After all, he loved them all equally. He knew that having six lovers would be a bit crazy, but after all, no one was stopping him from doing so, unless one of them would disagree. "Hmm... It is an insane idea, Valnin, but you know you just cannot choose between them, you would then feel bad for the rest" He said with a bit of a louder tone this time. He then realized it, and stayed quiet for at least ten seconds, hoping that no one heard has him. Silence. He sighed a sigh of relief. He then felt odd, as he realized that he was pretty paranoid about all this. "Being a ruler will kill you one day, Trildyn" He told himself again in quiet tone.

It was a normal day in Third Kindgom of Icestand. Valnin's experts, soldiers and servants were doing their standard routines, and all the work he had was tons of paperwork again. It wasn't really easy for his mental health, since he had a lot of problems of his own, and yet, he still had to deal with things in his own kingdom, in kingdoms of his co-rulers and also with things from other provinces and most of all, the Emerald Empire. It surely wasn't boring but more like irritating. Doing all the same things all over again despite the fact they should've been done already can be really mind-bothering. It took almost three quarters of the day to get all the formal things done. The Lord was sitting in his throne, his palm on his left cheek, enjoying the peace he finally got for the rest of the day. He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking about what he should do now that everyday's work has been done. His thoughts were interrupted by a voice of his runner who just got here "Your lordship, i hate to interrupt you, but Lord Arput II and Lord Voltor-Kal requested your presence in three days in Second Kingdom's capital". Valnin's face then shaped into annoyed expression, he sighed "Very well, tell them i'll be there, my servant". The runner bowed, and was on his way again. The Lord shifted in his throne again as he wanted to continue to think, but he couldn't. Something was keeping him from it. He got up, straightening his long black hair and then he thought about that he could visit one of his companions. But who? That was the question...

Captain of the Royal Security, Jaal Ama Darav, was just preparing to get out of his armor and head to his quarters, when suddenly someone knocked on the door. "Stars, what is it now?" He said under his breath. He cleared his throat and said just loudly enough so the person behind the door could hear him "Come in". He then checked his desk if he didn't forget anything while he heard the door open "I sincerely hope this is important. I had a long day, and I want to-" He stopped in the mid of his talk when he looked at the person who just came in. It was Lord Valnin, kindly smiling, his red eyes barely recognizable in the dim lights. "Oh, my Lord, I apologize, I didn't know that it was you" Jaal said with concerned voice. The Lord continued to smile, then he calmly said "Don't be so worried, Jaal. I just wanted to check up on you, my dearest Captain". The Angaran man blushed slightly, making his pink-white cheeks a little bit blue even though it couldn't really be seen in the dark ambience of his large office. "So how was your day, Jaal?" The Lord asked. The Captain slightly hesitated to tell him his honest thoughts, but in the end, he knew that there was something between him and Valnin, at least he felt that way and also the fact that Angara are more open with their feelings than most races made him say it, starting with a sigh "I... had a difficult day, my Lord. The new recruits we've got from the Empire? It is very difficult to work with them. If I would call them uneducated roekaar, it would be an understatement". Valnin felt that Jaal was feeling frustrated, but he couldn't help himself but to ask "Excuse me, but... uneducated what?". Jaal looked at Valnin with his blue almost cat-like eyes "Roekaar. It means stubborn people in free translation". Valnin nodded his head in understanding. "Well, you know what they say, you cannot trust n'wahs, the outlanders" Valnin said. The Captain just slowly nodded in agreement "Indeed, m'lord". Then there was a moment of silence between them, as they couldn't find subject to talk about. The silence has been broken when Jaal asked his Lord "Lord Valnin... I know this might be an inappropriate question, but is there-" He stopped, as he started to hesitate again. He just couldn't straight ask his own Lord if he cares about him as his lover. Valnin raises a brow "Yes?". Jaal looked at him for a second, then nervously looked away as the words were stuck in his throat. The Lord slowly came to him, putting his bare blue hand on Jaal's wide shoulder and while he was looking into his eyes, he said "Jaal, if there is anything on your heart, just tell me. I know it is kind of difficult to talk like that in front of your own ruler, but in the end, we are all just living beings". His words sounded so powerful when he was so close, almost like it was some kind of curse. The Angaran's eyes met with Lord's, returning him the confidence he needed to say it. "I just feel like there is something between us, my Lord. You gave me a few hints in the past, but I didn't think much of it. And recently, you were giving me lots of those odd looks and hints, it almost felt you like me, but in a way of a lover". As Valnin was processing what Jaal said, he just smiled "Tell me then, do you feel something towards me, my loyal subject?". And again, the Captain didn't have a slightest idea of what to say. The eye contact was still going, though. Nervous glare meeting the calm one. Jaal's imagination was going wild of what could happen in next few moments if he would be completely honest with him, alas his Angaran nature wasn't making it easy for him, he couldn't hold it anymore. "My lord... you are the most interesting and also most odd being I have ever known" he said in nervous but still voice as Valnin was smiling at him with his one brow slightly up. "You are an inspiration for me. For your men. For your whole kingdom" He continued with less and less nervousness in his voice. "I also find your race very fascinating. The wonderful scent of your hair. Your smooth blue skin. Your intriguing eyes, they can be both intimidating and pleasant to look at. They are like glittering..." He stopped as he was thinking for few seconds. "...I believe humans call it rubies" He said with sincere smile which revealed his almost-white teeth. The Lord was pleasantly surprised by all those words, his face bright with expression of smile so large, that it almost looked like his mouth was going to rip. "Oh, dearest Jaal, you have no idea how much i am flattered right now. I have to admit, you are very good with words, Captain" Valnin said with that never-ceasing smile. Jaal blushed slightly again, and gave him a warm smile back "Not as good as you are when it comes to politics, your Lordship". They shared their smiles once again, but then Jaal kindly asked "So how is it really, my Lord? Do you feel the same towards me as i do towards you?". The Lord went for it, and kissed Jaal ever so softly on his right cheek which left the Angaran man just standing there wide-eyed. "There's your answer, my dearest Jaal" Valnin said quietly, but loudly enough so Jaal would hear him. The Captain could not find any words to react with. "Good night, Jaal" The Lord said, and before Jaal could wish him back, he was gone. "... Good night, taoshay" Jaal said to himself even though he wanted his Lord to hear it, but who knows, maybe he did, elves have very good ears after all.

#fanfic #fantasy #writing #crossover

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nockfellblues · 4 years

Note

I don't know if you do these kinds of asks but how about reader pulling a hunger games type moment and confronting Larry before he kills himself saying if you go I do too I won't let someone I love die alone type thing.

All aboard the angst train ♥ written as a mini fic! TW for attempted suicide! Reader is gender neutral.

If you are in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline and get the help you deserve. Call 1-800-273-8255. If you are like me and are afraid to call, there are also live online chat options as well, located HERE!

You’d known for awhile something was... off with Larry. Ever since Sal had officially moved in with Todd and Neil, Larry had been stadoff-ish on a good day, and on bad days would seclude himself in the tree house, Sanity’s Fall blasting from that tiny stereo so loud you could hear it from your shared basement apartment. To say you were worried about his behavior was an understatement. Especially after you’d begun to notice the pattern of near constant headaches, the fact that he was always saying it was too loud in the apartment, the occasional mutter of, “shut up,” to an empty room when he though you weren’t close enough to hear, and the quickly worsening whip of anger he’d been developing… You were walking on eggshells at any given moment.

Finally, it all hit a breaking point.

You had been helping Larry pack up the remainder of his non-essentials, getting them ready to go over to his new room at Todd’s. It had been a process to pack a lot of his stuff up- it was a whole lifetime to sort through; countless weird knick knacks to decide to keep or not, finding old drawings and sketchbooks from his childhood, finding a random little thing that had been lost years ago tucked away in a dusty corner someplace…

To be honest, it had been more reminiscing about his childhood and the memories about each of the items you both went through than it was actually packing. But it was fun, and the wistful smile he wore as he told you stories of his mother, his missing father and his years of shenanigans with Sal and Todd made every wasted second well worth it.

When you unearthed a little silver puzzle box, you expected a fun story and for him to add it into the donation box for the local second hand shop for some needy kid to enjoy it later. But the simple question of, “Trash or stash?” quickly devolved into an argument about how much you didn’t care about his sentimentality or that it was an important object to him- and it just got worse from there- until you gave up, tossed up your hands, and stated you were gonna bring the box you’d finished earlier over to Todd’s while he cooled off, and walked out.

When you’d gotten there, the first thing you did was tell Sal what was up, hoping maybe he’d have some kind of wise words or what you could have done to set Larry off in the first place. Sally, ever the sweetheart, pulled you into a gentle hug, reassuring you that Larry was probably just having a rough patch and that he would talk to him and see if Larry might open up about it.

Taking Todd up on an offer to stay the night, you threw on a movie and made yourself comfortable on the couch, falling into a dreamless sleep.

Neil woke you the next morning with a killer cup of coffee and a poor mans breakfast of sugar coated pop tarts. Sally had come around not long after, letting you know Larry had texted him, and they’d be headed to the apartments for some, “Ghost hunting.” He seemed kind of tense but reassured you that he’d talk to Larry today, before he met up with Ash. Of course, you’d thanked him, and settled into Larry’s soon-to-be room to start sorting out some of the easier boxes.

—–

You woke up later, sprawled on the couch, to the sound of Todd rummaging in the kitchen. Yawning, you stretched and made your way out to greet him, smoothing out your bead-head.

“Hey Todd, how as class?” You asked, grabbing a seat at the kitchen table.

Todd shrugged, idly stirring an instant noodle cup, “No complaints. How’s Larry’s room coming along? Sal said you were unpacking this morning.”

“Well, I made it through the clothes and some oddball boxes… Did Sally mention anything about Larry by chance?”

Todd shook his head, “No, but he left with Ash almost as soon as he was back, so we didn’t have much time to chat. Knowing Sal, things should be smoothed over. He’s always been able to mellow Larry out like that.”

With that, you decided to head back and see if Larry was feeling any better after some Sally time. It was getting dark, and the thick clouds looming overhead finally opened into a sweeping downpour just after you had left Todd’s. You stopped under a thicket of trees just off the road, hoping the rain would lessen, when your cell phone went off.

Larry: [Name] im rly sry. i nvr meant that shit i said.

[Name]: Dude its all good i know youre stressed lately. Im heading back now.

Larry: stay at todds. and just dont blame urself ok? its my time to go.

[Name]: Larry wtf are you talking about? youre scaring me?

Without waiting for a reply you took off towards the apartments at a breakneck run. Bypassing the front door, you ran around the backside of the building to use the back entrance, when you noticed a light on in the old tree house- Then your gaze trailed down to the baggy with a neatly folded paper pinned to the lower steps on the tree.

You felt your blood run cold. He wouldn’t- no.

“Larry!” You scrambled up the rickety planks, ignoring the note, and all but threw yourself onto the tree house floor. “Larry, don’t!”

Tucked against the wall of the tree house, just under the little window, sat Larry, an old camping lantern lit in the corner beside him. His eyes were puffy and his hair disheveled, evidence that he’d been crying before. Tears welled in your own eyes as you took in his distraught expression and the bottle of whiskey in his hands.

“[Name]..?” He whispered your name, and the way his voice cracked brought you to instant tears, and you all but launched yourself at him, pulling him into a desperate embrace.

“Larry Johnson, you fucking asshole! Don’t you dare- don’t you dare take a sip from that bottle-”

“[Name]-” you cut him off, taking his face into your hands and forcing him to look at you. The circles under his eyes were so deep, and the absolute emptiness in them broke your heart.

“No! You listen here, you fucking string bean- you don’t get to do this. You can’t just… just push me away and expect me not to worry. You can’t just text… text me something like that and not expect me to come running to- to fucking keep you from being stupid! What the fuck am I supposed to do without you?!” You were openly sobbing now, practically screaming at the boy who all but held your entire world in his hands. “You’re all I have! You can’t just-just leave me behind and expect me to move on- who am I without my other half, Larry? Who am I?!”

He scrunched his eyes closed, tears streaming down his cheeks again, as he shook his head.

“If you fucking kill yourself, I’m going with you. And you can’t stop me.” You knew it was a dirty trick to play, guilting him like this when his soul was this ravaged and he was so vulnerable- but you were being honest. What would you do without him in your life? What about Sal? God, what about poor Lisa? He was so dear to you all, so loved, and he was ready and willing just throw it all away-

“[Name], I-I can’t take it anymore- I just- the cult shit, that demon, the ghosts! The fucking whispers- they’re dri-driving me insane! I‘m not like you or Sal- I can’t handle this shit anymore!” He finally breaks down into heaving sobs at that, burying his face into your shoulder, and dropping the bottle in favor of a bone-crushing embrace that you readily return.

You kick the bottle away from Larry, as far as you can get it, and quietly thank whoever will listen when the cap pops the rest of the way off, spilling the amber liquid and the mostly dissolved remnants of pills onto the tree house floor.

“…Why didn’t you just tell me? Or even Sal. Someone. You know we’d do anything for you, Larry, absolutely anything.” He didn’t reply, just shook his head and pulled you closer. What the fuck was was this place doing to him? You had to get him out- get him away- Larry’s phone vibrated from the other side of the tree house, but you elected to ignore it, praying whoever was calling was also smart enough to find you both before things got any worse.

He sniffled, hiccuping into you shoulder, “I’m so sorry, [name]. I didn’t mean anything that I said the other day- or anything I said in those other arguments. I just- This- this place is.. I think I’m going crazy-”

You shushed him, smoothing a hand down his hair and he devolved into body-wracking sobs that shook you both with the sheer force of them. Your soul ached for the boy you had known almost all your life- the boy you grew up with, shared secrets with, made countless memories with, and loved with all your heart.

Why didn’t you see this coming sooner? “I know, Larry, I know. This place- there’s something still wrong with Addison apartments and we’re gonna get you out of here, forever. I promise.”

“I-I’m so, so sorry, [name]. Please... Please don’t leave me.”

The rain continued to pour in violent sheets outside, but you distinctly heard the frantic voice of Sal, calling Larry’s name, as he ran towards the tree house. You had never felt such absolute relief in your life, even with Larry clinging to you like a lifeline, and the stain of his near-death slowly seeping into the floor of the tree house just behind you.

“I’m not going anywhere, Larry. I’m with you, always, no matter what happens.”

—fin—

WHEW. I tried to make it so you could read their relationship as either romantic or platonic, and tried to stay as neutral as possible in gender as well! I hope this is alright, and I hope you like it! I’ve actually never seen the Hunger Games so I kinda went my own way ♥

I’d also like to use this space as a PSA:I’ve struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts and tendencies my whole life- don’t let your depression convince you that you are trapped or alone or unloveable. I know its hard, and there’s no easy fix for it, but there are things in life that make it worth sticking around. Even if its something as silly as looking forward to a new game or story or waiting for a flower you planted to bloom, there are reasons to keep living. Please be kind to yourself and remember, even if we’ve never spoken or interacted or existed in the same space, I know that you are worthy of being loved and cared for and you are not alone.

If ever you feel like you are truly alone in this world, please reach out- there will always be people out here willing to lend a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold, and a friend to those who feel lost ♥ I know i will always be open to anyone out there in need of a friend so, please, never be afraid to reach out!

#sally face #sally face headcanon #sally face imagines #sal fisher #larry johnson #my writing #reader insert #xreader #larryxreader #i know the link will make this not show in the tag #but i wont take it out #it needs to be there #tw: suicide #tw: Depression

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capfalcon · 4 years

Note

top 5 f i c s

all my top 5 fics r for inception but like um in terms of marvel (i havent read marvel fic in a while ok this is hazy)

also i kind of hate you for this ask because i just re read literally every single fic i recced and now im fucking sobbing like a maniac

most of these r gonna be stevetony just an fyi and they are not in order bc honestly every fic is different and has it's own qualities and joys so they are not comparable or ranked i love them all. i would also like to mention that i am the type of person who has loved writing since i was maybe 4, and has been a writer since i was maybe 5, so like. when i recc these, i mean that these fics made me a different person. they made me a better writer. they made me a better human being. because every time you relate to a character over something you have 0 experience with, you are a different person. you have a new perspective. so i am reccing these from the perspective of both a writer and a human being and a person who loves words.

1. maya's (@quidhitch ) entire christmas AU makes me cry and laugh and cry and cry and smile and cry so much i love it (all her other fics are also life changing)

“I love this song,” Steve sighs.

Tony snorts. “Everyone in the world loves this song.”

“Doesn’t make it any less worth loving.”

2. hold your fire by jenthesweetie. this fic. god. this fic. raw. so fucking raw. i am a big big fan of the whole ravaged world idea, and this fic does it justice so beautifully. i even wrote my own fic sorta entirely based on this one. it's. so fucking good. plus im a really really big fan of...not ambiguous endings, but endings that aren't concrete. it's a fucked up world, and sometimes things dont have to be definitively good. it's a beautiful, beautiful fic.

"Yeah," Steve says, and then Tony's quiet for a long time, and absolutely nothing is ever right anymore but given the circumstances it's not exactly wrong, either.

3. okay. so this one is very difficult and honestly I'm gonna cheat and not even do it properly. there are a few select fics that @elcorhamletlive (nanasekei on Ao3) has written that literally maybe have changed my being. probably. quite possibly. almost undoubtedly.

the first is responsibility. this fic haunts me. genuinely. i fall asleep thinking about it, sometimes. it fucking hurts, but like in the way that makes you want it to hurt. (although this is the only fic i will ever recc with a sad ending. the only one. it is the only one i have ever found worth the pain.)

You think of Vormir, of how he kissed you too many times to say goodbye and not enough times to distract you from his shaking hands. He said I wish and you know now what he was thinking of.

the second is Hating Steve Rogers. no joke, for a period of like 5 months, i re read this fic at least ocne a week. i won't say more. the fic speaks for itself.

The thing about loving people is that no one’s exactly good at it. And Tony loves too much and too loudly, and Steve loves too much and too quietly, and they learn to find each other in the middle, to create their own frequency. It’s like palladium and shrapnel, and ice, and Steve’s touch in Tony’s hair in the morning, Steve’s voice at his ear at night, Steve’s hand carefully and slowly reaching for his during a team dinner.

Tony thinks: I’d start a war to get you to look at me like this.

(Maybe, Tony thinks, you just can’t be that stubborn and kind and brave and exist in the world without also being sad. Maybe being sad is just the price Steve pays for being real.)

Tony counts the endless shades of blue in his eyes, thinks of his hand still so close, wonders how it’s possible to feel drunker on someone’s presence than after five shots of whiskey.

the third is Five Seconds. it's a massive fuck you to the mcu and i love it immensly.

There are the moments where Steve thinks love, in itself, is not a good word to express what they have. Steve thinks love is too small a word – too simple, too easy –, and what he feels for Tony is something humanity hasn’t yet named. He wonders if in some reality someone has found the word, a word for the way he watches Tony yawn and stretch his arms above his head in the morning, a word for the feeling of dying and being born exactly at the same time.

the fourth. if I time it right, the thunder breaks (when I open my mouth). this fic is gorgeous. intricate. delicate. beautiful. just beautiful. it's sort of an ode to love and wanting someone, in its own beautiful way.

(If he’s going to be honest – and he’s always honest –, the minute the words actually leave his lips, he doesn’t regret them in the slightest, just like he didn’t before, in the hospital room and watching Tony sleep. At the end of the day, Steve thinks, you can’t regret the truth. It is just what it is.)

all the rest of her fics are beautiful and lovely and funny and so good, but these ones i would gladly get tattooed across my body, if i had to choose.

4. When Our Day Comes by thepartyresponsible

this is a funny but slightly serious fic about steve dealing with everything, cuz like. that's kind of a lot, and it's fun and it wormed a way into my heart. i adore it.

“Ugh, what the fuck,” Tony says, running a hand down his face. “JARVIS,” he says, as he falls back onto his bed, “I despoiled America’s sweetheart. Call Rhodey. Call a tattoo artist. Call a priest.”

5. Put My Guns in the Ground (I Can't Shoot Them Anymore) by jukeboxhound

one of the most important things in a fic for me is characterization. i don't really give a shit about grammar or format or even plot, i just want true to form characterization. tony stark is by far the hardest character I've ever written in terms of fanfic. his syntax and phrases and word choice are insanely unique. so, by large, i do not believe most authors tend to capure that perfectly. however, every fic on this list definitely does. but one of the defining characteristics i remember of this series is that i was pretty impressed with this take on ptsd and depression and mental health in relation to both steve and tony in general.

i have reread a few paragraphs in this fic daily for a few months because it's a piece of writing that sees me, that grips my fucking heart and hurts, says in no uncertain terms, "I hear you. I see you."

So yeah, Steve is their captain and their icon and this means he has to make the decisions that other people can't, or won't, or pretend don't exist in this modern civilized world. Tony puts his gauntlets on Steve's hips as though it'll anchor him in the correct era, in the here and now with Tony himself and the consumer capitalist soulless nation that America's becoming, where the American Dream has become the Wall Street Dream. Tony holds himself solid in the face of Steve's hard, bruising kisses, imagines himself taking in what Steve needs to give him and tucking it close inside the harsh light of the arc reactor because he's too cynical to let Captain America bear the weight of all their sins himself.

I'm aware that's technically both 5 and technically not 5, and i want to reiterate, this is not my top 5. this is not ranked. these are the fics i remember right now, and yes, they're beautiful, but there are dozens of other fics i love. there are fics so gorgeous i wish i could make every person on earth read. nasafic's fics got me into stevetony in the first place. i love romcommed by fate, i love first impressions, i love so so so so many more fics than this. but here we are.

i'm gonna go cry some more now and maybe go take another 4 hour nap.

#ask #save #fic rec #fic recs #fics

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warmau · 5 years

Text

{Special} College!AU Hanbin

*this post was commissioned | find all my college aus here | commission info

major: electrical engineering

minor: philosophy

clubs: engineering association, secretly attends music club and says that he doesn’t even though junhoe has caught him multiple times

sports: LOL is being on his college’s esport team count? does asking jiwon about his gym routine count?

hanbin is definitely a notable character on campus

he isn’t insanely popular and social like jinhwan or donghyuk - boasting thousands of followers on instagram and being labeled the princes’ of their department

but he’s not a total tech nerd like chanwoo - who keeps crushing poor hanbin at every video game he gets into

but a lot of people do know him

mostly because he’s got resting pissed off face

and nearly half the student body has gotten the wrong impression because of that

the amount of times jinhwan has had to explain to people that no hanbin isn’t glaring at you - he just can’t see very well

or in fact, he actually think you’re pretty cool it’s just,,,,,,,for some reason,,,hanbin never learned to express that very well

actually, hanbin isn’t good at expressing in general

he shifts from focused and hardworking when it comes to his studies, to tired and lazy when it comes to just about anything else

he can get loud when he thinks someone is cheating in overwatch or when someone bothers him in the middle of studying

but a genuine smile,,,,,,,,even after years of friendship jiwon admits he isn’t really sure he’s seen one from hanbin

but that’s not true, because hanbin does smile

especially when he’s embarrassed

and what embarrasses him the most????? love

any mention of relationships, skinship, dates, marriage, lovers - all of it makes hanbin get all awkward and jittery

he once got asked out by a brave freshman in his elective arts class

and got so flustered and unable to answer that instead of answering them he excused himself from the classroom

and did THREE laps around the arts building

dripping paint everywhere because he’d forgotten to set down his brushes when he’d rushed out

whenever he’s asked who his ideal partner is, or who he has a crush on on campus

he always answers with an idol’s name or a video game character

people always lifting an eyebrow because isn’t that a little childish, or is he just avoiding the question?

but he honestly means it - the idea of dating,,,,,,he won’t admit it,,,,,,,but it’s a bit too much for hanbin to handle for some reason

that being said - hanbin, deep down past the sarcasm and high standards

is a good person

he’d give up everything in the world for his sister, hanging photos of his family sentimentally in his dorm

even though he’d complain about it - he’d shrug off his jacket and drop it into the hands of someone whose cold

scolding them, telling them they’re dumb for not wearing layers but all the while knowing that he just doesn’t want them to get sick

yunhyeong gets teased by hanbin relentlessly everyday of his college life - but he never seems to hold a grudge

and when people ask him why,,,,,,,,yunhyeong just says

“hanbin might say stupid things, but his actions always tell me that he values me as a friend.”

soooo why electrical engineering??? to be honest hanbin had wanted to pursue music but tinkering with the actual hardware of computers and circuits had also caught his interest

he always explains that he works better with his hands than his brain - which seems like it wouldn’t work for engineering

but it does

and the philosophy minor has more to do with the fact that no matter how dumb he tries to say he is

hanbin has bigger ideas about the world, consistently questioning if people have purposes at all

much to jinhwan’s disappointment because

“god hanbin we’re at a club! no one wants to hear about freud! i want to get DRUNK dude!”

hanbin looks cute walking around campus with his nose stuck in a ‘intro to hegel’ textbook, rocking a cute dva keychain on his backpack

and hiding his face behind a white mask because he’s convinced jiwon is stealing his moisturizer and this weather isn’t good for his skin

you’re actually in the nursing program of the university with jinhwan

you hadn’t really meant to befriend the most popular senior in your major - but you’d been randomly assigned to complete a large scale research project with him on new tech influenced medical practices

and had somehow also found yourself agreeing to work on it,,,,,,,in his dorm

“i know the idea of three guys in one dorm is intimidating, but we have a lot of space considering it’s supposed to room up to six people. they’ll be more space for us to spread out!”

jinhwan insisted, unlocking the door to his dorm as you stood uncomfortably behind him

clutching the strap of your messenger bag for dear life

when you follow behind him, you notice both his roommates splayed out on a couch - game controllers in their hands

one of them pushes the other in the shoulder, and - oh my god he doesn’t have a shirt on!

you instantly look down and jinhwan clears his throat

“jiwon go put some cloths on - we have a guest!”

one of them, jiwon you presume, gets up to stroll out of the room

but not before giving you a casual wave as you feel the tips of your ears burn in embarrassment

the remaining roommate gets up too - switching of the ps4 as he comes over to you and jinhwan

“this is hanbin, i know he looks like he wants to kill you, but that’s just because he’s ugly.”

jinhwan introduces

and hanbin rolls his eyes, mumbling about how if jinhwan wasn’t his senior - he’d really have something nasty to say

before looking at you

he’s handsome, you think, but jinhwan is right he does have kind of a cold expression in his eyes

but either way - you manage out a small introduction and hanbin returns with his own

it’s only maybe thirty seconds of interaction? it’s the first time you speak to hanbin and you never expect it to cross your mind ever again

you go by weeks, coming over to this dorm to work on this project with jinhwan

jiwon and hanbin never really bother you guys, only asking every now and then what jinhwan wants to order for dinner - inviting you to stay and pratake in late night pizza or home cooking from jiwon’s aunts

sometimes hanbin will help you guys, not that he knows much about nursing

but he knows about researching and tech

you’ll sit with your laptop shared between you and him and jinhwan

and it used to be weird - being alone in this space of three friends, but before you knew it

it was comfortable

and then,,,,,,,,,,,,something changed

it was a week before you and jinhwan would be presenting your project

it was nearly done and this was supposed to be a run through of what you’d both be saying

but since you had classes till 9 pm, you only managed to get to their dorm when it was already pretty dark

the door was open and you let yourself in, setting down the bag of canned coffee and candy you’d bought from a nearby grocery

assuming you and jinhwan would need major caffeine to go through this large presentation

but to your shock, jinhwan wasn’t home - nor was jiwon

it was only you and hanbin

he’d shuffled out of his room, hair a mess and glasses perched on top of his head

“do you know where jinhwan is?”

hanbin had yawned and shook his head

“nope, probably got caught up hanging out with someone but he’ll be back soon”

he saunters over to you, rummaging through the bag you’d brought and pulling out a can of coffee

“can i have one? im going to be up for a final tonight too.”

you tell him to help himself, looking up to see hanbin’s eyes are tired - ringed with red like he hasn’t slept in days already

for a couple of minutes you guys make casual chit-chat

multiple times after finding out you’d been working with jinhwan at his dorms people have asked

is hanbin as scary as he seems? is he always mean to you? he seems like the type to nag or get angry over anything.......

but he’d never been even close to mean - he was always just,,,,,,normal

and even though he was less talkative and forthcoming than jiwon

and never downright flirty like jinhwan

he was nice in his own way

hanbin excuses himself to get back to studying and you get comfortable on the couch

opening up your notes as you wait for jinhwan

the time passes as you fall deeper into your notes

it reaches midnight and jinhwan doesn’t show any signs of coming back - neither does jiwon

you worry, maybe they’re both in trouble?

so you get up and make your way over to hanbin’s room, softly knocking on the door

after a few seconds of shuffling, he opens it and you apologize to interrupt but isn’t he also worried where his two friends are?

hanbin sighs, but agrees with you

“those idiots know the RA will lose it if we stay out past midnight. i should go and try to find them,,,,,,,,”

“ill help, if that’s ok?”

hanbin nods, taking his coat off his desk chair

you and him make a couple of rounds around the campus hot spots

there are tons of people still studying in the library and even a couple hanging around the gym

but not jinhwan and jiwon

hanbin tries calling them, then texting donghyuck who usually knows where to find at least one of them

but no luck

“im sure they’re just out partying. but what an idiot, im going to tell jinhwan off for forgetting he promised to study with you.”

you smile weakly

“it’s ok! im sure he didn’t mean to forget.”

“still, he’s older than both of us - he should really be more responsible.”

hanbin checks the time on his phone again

“c’mon ill walk you back to your dorm.”

you thank him, searching for your keys in your pockets when you realize you left your bag back at their place

you embarrassingly admit it, but hanbin tells you that it’s fine - you guys can go get it and then he’ll walk you home either way

“being out late like this is dangerous”

you two return and you pick up your bag, but before you go hanbin offers to go through your presentation with you if you want

at least that way you haven’t completely wasted your time

even though the clock ticks past one in the morning - hanbin watches you present from your note cards

clicking through the slides on your laptop

he even helps with some of the formatting and suggests helpful changes

the time escapes you at some point, and when the presentation is over you just end up on the couch beside hanbin

as you two just talk

as hanbin reveals to you his interests in philosophy - in the big questions of the world

and as you let him know that a lot of the same questions are the reason why you got into nursing

“i want a purpose in life - i want to help people.”

“see, i think even though purposes can vary - that’s one that never changes.”

you take a moment, thinking it over and finding that it’s true - no matter where your life goes, your profession would mean you cared for people

“do you think just having a good career where you help others is worth living?”

hanbin looks down at his hands and shrugs

“maybe, some people tell me the purpose of life is to fall in love and start a family. some tell me it’s about making money. but our connections to others - isn’t that what matters? isn’t that how we’re defined?”

the conversation spans on and on, you both lose yourselves

and hanbin doesn’t think he’s ever really talked to someone like this before

and you don’t think you’ve ever felt so ,,,,, open with someone you might not even call a friend yet

and who knows why or how you two got here

what chain of events lead you up to being in hanbin’s dorm on a thursday night past midnight

and why when you should have left hours ago and he should have returned to his books

you’d ended up moving closer and closer

till the only light in the room, the one from your laptop screen dulls

and you lean forward, one hand on hanbin’s thigh

lips brushing his

your memory flashes to the first time you met - how cold his eyes had seemed, but how it didn’t take away from how handsome you thought he was

and hanbin - who’d spent most of his time avoiding these situation, not involving himself romantically with anyone

was letting you do this

and maybe he doesn’t say it to anyone

especially not to himself

that he’s always found himself drawn to you

the image of you sitting cross legged on the floor with jinhwan, debating resources for your project

how you’d come over sometimes after class, with a thousand different papers in your hands

a pencil tucked cutely behind your ear

the way you’d laughed, filling the dorm with a musical soft sound when jiwon showed you a video of jinhwan pouring drinks all over himself on a dare one time

how he’d be playing video games with jiwon, pulling jinhwan’s attention away

and you never got angry

instead hanbin would put down his controller and catch you on your phone, lower lip between your teeth

and now

when you’d chosen to let him help you, had chosen to talk with him through the night

and you’d chosen to kiss him

and for a moment he’d chosen to kiss you back

but then

you both were pulling away - as if simultaneously realizing how this situation was just

too sudden

too abrupt

so you collect your things, hanbin gets up to walk you to the door, but it’s shutting in his face before he can even blink

“tell jinhwan to call me when he’s back”

is the last thing you say

and after that everything in hanbin’s world falls out of sync

like the planets have all aligned but it’s wrong - his center of gravity just doesn’t exist

jinhwan turns up in the morning, profusely apologizing to you on the phone as hanbin listens quietly

“it totally slipped my mind that we said we’d study again - i’ll buy you lunch as an apology - no no don’t even think about saying no, i was such a dumbass!”

hanbin clutches his fist, some weird feeling of uneasiness piling up in the pit of his gut

when jinhwan hangs up, hanbin gets up with such a loud sound it startles his roommate

“dude, what’s wrong?”

hanbin doesn’t meet jinhwan’s gaze

“you are a dumbass, i don’t care if you’re older than me - you deserve to be called that.”

jinhwan sort of goes speechless as he watches hanbin disappear down the hall

you and jinhwan give your presentation, it goes great, you get an A

and after that

you never come around anymore

and hanbin hates that your absence weighs on him

why aren’t they sitting on the couch? why aren’t they laughing at something stupid one of us did? why aren’t they here - why can’t i see them?

hanbin finds himself walking past flower stands, seeing bouquets of roses or tulips and for some reason he hovers

what kind of flowers do they like? do they even like flowers in the first place? and why do i care - why do i want to know so badly?

the shopkeepers always try to ask if he needs help, he has been standing staring at them for twenty minutes

but hanbin never buys them - just apologizes and runs off

but it’s not just flowers, this happens with everything

and he doesn’t get it - it doesn’t make sense

when he catches you coming out of from class, chatting with some of your friends

an unstoppable urge pushes him toward you - but he takes every ounce to fight it back

yes you two kissed - but it was spur of the moment - and you had run away

why would he approach you now, wouldn’t that just seem desperate?

but in reality, you’re just like hanbin

you’re much more versed in these feelings so you realize you have a crush on him, one that had harbored itself over those late night study sessions with jinhwan

where you’d be working on your project, but be acutely aware of hanbin’s presence

the little noises he made when he lost to jiwon in games, how he looked good even in sweatpants and a t-shirt

you don’t really know why you pushed away from him in that moment you had with him

it was just weird

he had sort of kissed you back? but there seemed to be this air of hesitance so you ran away

you wish you could talk to him, figure it out

but you also come to the same conclusion

i don’t want to seem desperate

about a good two weeks passes before suddenly jinhwan is standing in front of you outside of the nursing building with his hands on his hips

“hey, we need to talk”

“but the project is over-”

“no, we have another problem. a problem that i have to live with until i graduate so i want to sort it out now.”

at first you’re utterly confused

how are you at all involved with any problems of jinhwans - but then jinhwan sighs and goes

“hanbin, im talking about hanbin.”

did he tell jinhwan about what happened!?!?

you feel a rush of embarrassment, not sure how to explain to the senior of yours that it was a mistake, really just a mistake

but then you see something change in jinhwan’s expression

“i think he likes you.”

backtracking for a second you kind of just stare at jinhwan in disbelief

“h-he likes me? and he told you to tell me?”

jinhwan shakes his head and you two sit down on the steps of the building

“no, he didn’t. actually, i don’t think he himself realizes what his feelings are. hanbin is kind of ,,,,,,,,,,,, bad in the relationships department.”

you look down, remembering something hanbin had said to you the last night you saw each other

our connections with people is what matters

“oh,,,,but - how do you know that he feels that way if he hasn’t even said it?”

jinhwan gives a weak smile

“because i saw him toss chocolates into the garbage, make a playlist full of love songs before deleting it angrily off his laptop, and the guy ive known since we were in highschool suddenly didn’t look like someone i knew at all. he’s struggling and only one thing makes hanbin like that.”

jinhwan touches your hand gently

“and it’s love.”

to be honest, you don’t know what to do with this information

that night on the couch, you felt a strong connection with hanbin. so strong that it lead you to do something drastic and out of character, but looking back on it

the feeling was blissful

and if you could build on that,,,,with hanbin,,,,,,you really wouldn’t mind at all

but how can i just approach him now? it’s been some time, what if he just flat our rejects me?

you sigh, lost in your thoughts as the bustle of university life surrounds you

couples pass you by, laughing and talking

holding hands and kissing

and then the crowd parts and for a split second across them all you see a figure all alone

it’s hanbin

he has a book in one hand, coffee in the other - his backpack at his feet with the corner of his engineering textbook sticking out

he briefly looks up, meeting your gaze

and then the sea of people returns and you feel something in your heart tug

you go forward, confident that you can push through the bustle of people who are running around campus all the time

classes just let out so there’s a swarm but you walk right into the middle

i should go talk to hanbin! if jinhwan is right,,,,,,,i want to make sure of it myself!

but you don’t even have to make it to the end of the people because hanbin meets you halfway

and you both look at each other, wide eyed and shocked

“did you-”

“i wanted to talk-”

you feel your shoulder get brushed past by students, hanbin clutching his bag closer not to be in anyone’s way

and then without really thinking about it you put a hand on his wrist and you two join the moving flow

you sit down with him somewhere more secluded, neither of you is sure what to stay or how to start this

until hanbin mumbles

“let’s just do this all over again?”

you nod and before you know it he’s set down his book and coffee and leans in

cold fingertips on your cheeks as he asks you to close your eyes and this time

he’s the one that kisses you

and there are no intentions of pulling away

“why did you start liking me?”

“i guess i always thought you were cute, ever since you started coming around for your project with jinhwan. but after talking to you,,,”

hanbin looks for the right word

“it just clicked. you’re the kind of person that i want.”

jinhwan calls it when you come back hand in hand with hanbin to the dorms

like legit he gets his tiny body onto the couch, pointing at you two triumphantly like I KNEW IT

while jiwon is just flabbergasted

because quote on quote “you like hanbin back? but he has no redeeming qualities,,,,,,”

hanbin: “jiwon the only thing smaller than a pea is your brain”

but they both are just joking, they are actually super happy to see that hanbin has gotten a partner

because honestly there were bets going around in the group that he’d end up a hermit or something

yunhyeong, chanwoo, junhoe, and donghyuk all meet you a couple of days later when jinhwan insists they go out for drinks to celebrate

‘hanbin becoming a man’

yunhyeong and donghyuk immediately give you their contacts - just in case hanbin tries anything funny

while junhoe and chanwoo just clap hanbin on the back because - wow never thought you had it in you!

to be honest it’s a little bit embarrassing to be surrounded by hanbin’s friend group, they’re all such strong personalities, but they accept you just fine

dating hanbin means putting up with his roommates shenanigans

which are harmless toward you, just a lot of watching hanbin get teased for being bad at overwatch and jinhwan telling you that hanbin fell asleep in jeans three times this week

and the rest of his friends are just as fun, telling you joke stories about hanbin

but also RELENTLESSLY bringing up every gushy thing he’s said or done for you

“did you know hanbin put your picture on his phone case?”

“did you know hanbin spent hours googling ‘date ideas’ last night?”

“did you know hanbin almost broke chanwoo’s headset when chanwoo suggested that he’d invite you over to get coffee with him sometime?”

like it’s amazing how close they all are,,,,but now you’re in the cross fire of it all too

hanbin teaches you that the easiest thing is to ignore them - even though you know that he doesn’t

like you’re giving him a hug goodbye after you all went to the movies and you just know junhoe is wiggling his eyebrows and hanbin is flipping him off

but speaking of dates - hanbin is surprisingly good at picking romantic spots even though he admits that he’s never really been a romantic person

you guys go to a lot of live music shows, especially r&b soloist and jazz

hanbin reveals to you that he’s always had an interest in writing and producing music

and when you ask him excitedly to sing for you

he just goes “ah- what? no way!” but at some point you pester him just enough for him to sing a line from a song you like

and your jaw just drops because his voice is unique and can go pretty deep

and now every time you stay over, dozing off on hanbin’s chest you can hear him mumble the lyrics of some song against your hair

but other dates include; exploring wine bars, hanbin taking blurry photographs of you when you’re out in the park, and of course helping each other study

even though opening an engineering textbook scares the living daylights out of you

and hanbin will be the first to admit that he has no clue about any of the bones in his body

“but if you want to give me a full body exam, feel free?”

“hanbin,,,,,,,,,,did you just use a pick up line on me?”

“maybe”

“hanbin,,,,,,,,,,,we’re dating.”

his clumsiness does show itself when he’s trying to be a good boyfriend

because sometimes he can’t think of the right things to say and he needs to ask jinhwan for tips on how to deal with arguments

but he’s trying

no matter what - he’s trying to be the kind of boyfriend you dream about

and just seeing the effort makes you fall more in love

will hand write apology letters even if he just showed up late to pick you up from class LOL

he is pretty good at motivating you though

sometimes you’ll actually ask him to critique your work or tell you how you can do this or that better

and he’s shocked because his opinions usually just get taken the wrong way by people

but you know hanbin can really help you so you’re like give me your worst critique ever!!! i can handle it!!!!

he thinks it’s cute how you sometimes want him to tell you what’s wrong even though he’s told you ten times nothing is wrong

and he’ll be like “ok fine, ummm i don’t like the font you used”

“hanbin please take this more seriously”

“ok i don’t like that you indented twice here - im sorry don’t throw that pillow at me!”

playing video games with hanbin and beating him at them and then having to kiss his face all over because nooooo you didn’t mean tooooo

kissing hanbin is always a thrill

he’s a good kisser, but sometimes he can knock you off your feet a little and you have to stop him before he goes too far in public

like his need for affection is pretty high

which is a shocker considering he avoided relationships for so long

but now he’s just like kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss

starts working out so he looks better taking his shirt off and you never notice because like hello he’s hot already

but he’s just like gonna flex and turn my partner on but it’s like whatever you’re already turned on

the tattoo?? the broad shoulders?? the darkness that overcasts his eyes when he gets ontop of you?? LIKE,,,,,,,,

you come out of his room one day wearing just his shirt and jiwon drops his poptart because he’s surprised

and in an instant hanbin is in front of you blocking you off like “jiwon close your eyes you sinner”

and jiwon is like i just want to eat my poptart bro please put some pants on you’re more naked than your significant other

hanbin also surprises you because he gets pretty artsy, like he likes old movies and roll films

and you get him a polaroid on his birthday and he makes one of those cute hanging decorations with photos of you to hang above his desk

donghyuk is like that’s so diy hanbin how cute

and hanbin is like if you call me cute ill kill you,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,but also it is cute isn’t it?

finally hanbin learns what your favorite flowers are and he gets them for you randomly and you’re like oooo so pretty

and the way your face lights up everytime just. kills. him

you’re the cutest person to have ever lived

late night conversations about life, sipping milk tea on the roof of the nursing building while sharing kissing every now and then, watching ghilbi movies under the covers together

dating hanbin is such an experience and it’s one that reminds you why you started feeling something for him in the first place

and it’s because past the surface, there’s a whole world inside of him

and although people get too frightened to befriend or get close to him, the truth is he’s never wished ill on anybody

in fact - he means to help even if it comes out kinda rough

but you appreciate all of that about him

and hanbin finally feels like someone on this planet really is his soulmate

he might have not believed it before

but looking up at you

as you comb your hands through his hair with his head in your lap

watching the tv screen idly after a tough day of classes

and smiling shyly when the male lead on the screen grabs the other lead and kisses them with everything

putting your gaze down to travel over hanbin’s own lips

he thinks

soulmates are real

and he motions for you to lean down and let him kiss you with just as much passion

jinhwan walking in, unfazed by this pda: hanbin look how far you’ve come, from not being able to touch another persons shoulder to making out on MY couch

#ikon scenarios #ikon imagines #ikon au #hanbin scenarios #hanbin imagines #hanbin au #b.i scenarios #b.i imagines #b.i au #writing commissions #sfw #college!au #THIS is so artsy because hanbin is ARTSY........and cute

462 notes · View notes

a-manes · 5 years

Note

Opinion on m&m? Mine personally is that they should remain friends after this hook up since it’s been established that Michael and Alex have a cosmic like romance, she would end up hurt otherwise

my genuine and honest opinion on michael/maria is sort of all over the place WHICH IS WHY THIS POST IS SO LONG IM SORRY, but essentially it’s this:

out of context of what is happening in the show, i think the actors have a really nice chemistry, look hot together and i would watch them make out for 5 hours straight just out of standard human interest

i think the relationship between michael and maria is also fun - they’ve got the banter, she does not need him and he’s really more of an inconvenience to her half the time, but she likes him and he likes her. like, it’s a good and interesting base point for a ship, so i’m into that aspect of it

like, if you took them out of roswell and stuck them in a show together with this exact relationship i’d be out here like WHAT IF U GOT MARRIED

WHAT IF U STARTED OUT CASUAL BUT THEN ACCIDENTALLY FELL IN LOVE AND GOT MARRIED

you know?

like, out of context i’m so so so into it lmao

AND THE LONGER MALEX WENT WITHOUT SCENES, THE HARDER IT WAS TO REMEMBER THE CONTEXT ngl absence made the heart grow m/m-shippery

which uh…. brings me to:

within the context of the show (or: taking into account the ‘alex’ of it all) - alex being one of maria’s best friends and michael and alex honestly having this frankly insane love story

they fell in love ten years ago without really even knowing each other and then didn’t stop loving each other for that whole time

which could be… honestly, imo, the basis for the ship you know you’re supposed to like but aren’t really into - but it’s saved, i think, by a few things: namely the actors’ chemistry and just how likeable both alex and michael are individually and how shitty their lives are and how much you genuinely want them to be happy

plus, they’re really good at looking desperately in love with each other

like, i felt that

and i think… my need for alex manes to be happy supercedes my enjoyment of michael/maria and also i think the way they’ve told michael/alex’s story so far also supercedes my enjoyment of the potential of michael/maria

like.... if m/m got together for realsies, i think my sadness on behalf of alex would dull my happiness at getting to watch michael and maria fall in love? whereas maria ain’t into it like that yet so for her to have a casual hook up and then move on is fine, bc she’s not getting hurt

and maria deluca deserves only nice things and good romance and happiness and hot sex

and so i love how they played it in the last episode, because i think… again, the chemistry between michael and maria is there, so the boning was inevitable imo. i like that the context was very clear cut: this happened but it’s nothing more to either of them

alex officially drew a line under his and michael’s relationship and michael’s response to this was literally to act like something of a fucking lunatic

or like a precocious 5 year old boy who you can’t put around adults because he just starts acting up lmao

literally aggressively hitting on maria for funsies bc #wildcard #nihilsmrules

and maria is going through such shit with her mother - she had this hope in her heart and it was crushed

and as liz says, maria deluca saves herself - she forces them all to try and have a good night

and they’re both drunk and high and lost in a desert

and then michael kisses her to shut her up lolol - and she’s like hm hell yes this is a good idea and they bang in the desert and probably get a shit load of sand in their naughty parts

and then maria wakes up in the morning and her literal reaction is a headdesk lmaooooo

and they’re both pretty chill about it, because as i say, the feelings really didn’t run deeper than being drunk and sort of miserable and blowing off some steam

and i love that for them and i think it’s super important that they get to keep interacting and become friends and genuinely care about one another, bc their interactions and relationship are wonderful

but also…. alex is out here shutting down government operations and changing his whole fucking life because he’s so stupidly in love with michael

michael and alex would fuckin die for each other yk

michael calling them ‘cosmic’ all casually and without a trace of irony and alex literally finding out that michael and maria banged, having that ready excuse to walk away again and saying fuck it and just

staying and expressing his genuine feelings instead

and they both… care so deeply for one another. they respect each other. their love story is insane. plus there’s something weirdly compelling about this idea that these two people feel this way about one another without actually knowing each other

and realising that and wanting to take the time to get to know one another as people

i kind of love that

i mean, it’s fucking ridiculous, but i love it

their romance is so epic and the performances make it genuinely believable (which i do think is so hard to pull off considering) (it would be very easy to make them a lot less enjoyable imo) and the characters being wonderful make it something you want to root for imo, so like

as much as i would happily read 100 au’s about maria and michael falling in love, in terms of the show my heart really still lies with malex

this doesn’t mean i don’t want 50 gifsets of them making out though, just to make that clear

i’m a lesbian but when he took his cowboy hat off even i was a bit like ….ok????? yes???

like fuck get it maria

he’s still punching above his weight tho i said what i said

if episode 10 isn’t literally just an episode filled with malex though i’m suing xoxo

#answering anons #malex #maria x michael #long post #Anonymous

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qdtquietdownthere · 5 years

Text

Day 7- Cats and dogs and aerobics.

Day 7

I eat a Portuguese custard tart from the library this morning. I am becoming obsessed. Tell you what though, they've made me a local, a regular, and I am now at the point where the lady who runs the cafe says hi to me in the morning. I say hi back too of course. ( golden rules- become a regular)

Straight to exercise class with a Portuguese tart still in my upper belly. Its in the community centre that the lunch club was in, but this time its upstairs in an equally run down space. This makes is a safe space though, it is nothing too snazzy, too characteristic to make walking into an unknown class scary. Unlike a virgin active gym or one of these snazzy soho gyms this space is honest. Honest is inviting. It is for everyone.

The class is free and there is around 12 of us. Im told to wear comfy clothes so I am wearing a jumpsuit and a t-shirt. Bad call- I sweat profusely. It is a mixture of cardio strength and punching and dancing followed by a little yoga. We hold a plank position for 2 minutes on an off and I feel I am in some insane olympic boot camp. There is a range of fitnesses and our teacher (a local who knows everyones names) is encouraging and funny. I like being here and feel completely valid and welcome in whatever I am wearing and whatever my fitness. I speak to a lady after class who comes regularly and must be in her late 70’s. There is also a younger woman in the class who brings her little boy. He sits in the buggy and sometimes cries but it is not a problem. This relaxed atmosphere, no booking, no scary music, no ‘being late’ or issues about leaving early are a problem. It makes it accessible.

The class is women only and this is for religious reasons, Sahara tells me (the class teacher) after our 1hr session. We walk and talk about art and the area. She talks about Churchill gardens history and the history of Dolphin square.

So I head on over to Battersea towards the Dog and cat home. A different world. A free bicycle station is set up just before the bridge. Its funded by Westminster council and it makes me happy to see yet another free service. Again, it is approachable. I write on my phone as I walk, and as I walk over the bridge I look back over at Churchill gardens, with its amazing flats sticking out over the canopy of trees. It is oasis like. It seems to be cut off from the rest of the world.

The next section is from the notes on my phone:

Battersea bridge. A huge development across the water. Flats over the bridge are all a development. Flats with concierge and glass balconies. The area and walk to the cat home feels like a new pair of shoes which need to be worn in. I don't feel so comfortable here, its so clean that it feels a little dirty. I want to go back to Pimlico. They want to build a pedestrian bridge which will connect Battersea with Pimlico from Georges park. Pimlico is not happy with this…and the reasons? I have heard mixed opinions varying from who will it attract, will it bring crime, whats the point. More importantly the word ‘Waitrose' has also come up a few times. Elizabeth is keen to be able to cycle over and get to Waitrose, but a lady in my exercise class said that everything the community needs is on our doorstep (and how could we forget the number 24 bus which goes straight to the big Tesco) I notice that communities thrive in routine and comfort of the predictable. Don't we all? When I worked at the museum every day half way through my cycle home I would stop at one particular Sainsbury's express to get this one particular coconut chocolate bar thing. Creatures of habit and place. It is becoming more apparent how clear the boundaries of each estate and area are. Not in a hostile way. It is just common knowledge where people are from and where their street ends. So many times I have been told about roads or given direction with this confident presumption that i know each street by its name. This community is interwoven in its place.

I fight constantly between ideas on expansion and local. But people want to belong to a group and a group that works. whats happening in Tottenham is not happening in Westminster ( Local maybe wins this short tangent of a debate)

I am at Battersea dog and cat home. I eat another sweet treat and try to adopt a cat called Marley. It doesn't feel local here. I have an interview with a lady about my suitability to be a cat owner, during which I try to ask about the area and where the cats go/come but she tells me she cannot say as the work they do is so far reaching. Its nice though, and I fall involve with a big fat dog and a big cat fat. We would have all made a great family.

I walk home towards Pimlico, back along this major road but I duck into Battersea park, which is where I am writing from. The sun is on my laptop (I hope it doing combust) and a green parrot has just flow in front of me. I will stay here for a while thinking and writing and watching. I feel funny today, Its a bitty day. The schedule feels a little jolted, which it has never felt before. I think maybe it feels like this because i have left the area I have come to know. Its funny leaving it and entering new uncharted lands. Whenever i have done this by myself I do it on my bike. Walking is different. I can see why people don't leave Pimlico. Or why anyone doesn't leave their areas. Comfort and confidence.

I am now sat eating a curry in Pimlico Spice and I do not want to be here. I am the only person in the restaurant and I order something i would never order. The two young men serving me are probably wondering what I am doing by myself at 6pm eating a huge bowl of curry. I would never go out for dinner by myself. Eating lunch- fine. But dinner? Actually maybe it would be fine if there was at least one other person in this restaurant eating. Not just me. At 6pm. I am funny about food. Brought up with broccoli every night I don't like to eat unhealthy things. Food is something we have control over and I like eating what I like and know. Sat here with the two waiters awkwardly walking around me I feel on display. Food, new food, is a social thing. I should have a friend here, or anyone. I wouldn't think twice about it. I don't want to eat the food I have in particular but it was a chef special and I think it is time to branch away from a Saag Paneer. 2 groups of people come in, all for take away. Eating dinner in a restaurant by myself makes me feel so lonely. I want to go home now.

I am home and downstairs is a half eaten curry in tup a wear in the fridge. When I was on the tube I was worried it was going to spill everywhere, all over my lap and the floor and the seat, and everyone would know I am the girl who ate a sad curry by myself for my dinner.

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preternatural-fools · 5 years

Note

another silly romance question for the boys because they make my heart happy- how far along into a relationship would the boys say “I love you”/“im in love with you”? How would they go about it? Would it be a casual thing, a prepared thing, or like “oops it accidentally slipped out and now im low key embarrassed” type thing? - chaotic anon🧚🏻‍♀️✨

My heart is,,,,screaming inside my chest, she’s doing the anD IIIIIEEEYIIIIIII ya know fsdfjk

OkAy LADIES N GENTS sbjdskj hold onto your hats this is getting written Kay style which means we OVEREXPLAINING IN THIS HOUSE TONIGHT FOLKS!

Fair warning: Some of this got a little scenario-y, like instead of answering your question, I gave an example via mini scenario? fsdfhsd SorRY

To be honest, I think Tae, Jungkook, and Jimin would be the ones to say it the soonest(is that a word? I don’t know, I don’t care, grammar who?)~~ and those three give me the “I’m in love with you” vibes.

Jungkook would be 100% positive sure (shout out to my friend who says that and got me hooked) that he loved the person before he said it, and it would be within the first like, maybe 3-5 months. But the thing is, he would be sure that he really liked the person before he made a move and even got into the relationship aspect. But in terms of “I love you”, it’s probably more like “This is serious, I can feel it.” around 3, by 4 he’d be like “I love them,” in more of a lighthearted way, love them as a person, but by 5 he would know, ya know? He just KNOWS, that fae intuition, that zap, that soul click, he would know that he loves them with every fiber in his being and he would absolutely say it, blank range, right in the chest, his S/O would do something small or cute and he would get that big, kinda shy grin, his eyes would crinkle, and he would probably reach for their hands or their face and just, “I love you, I’m in love with you.”

Jimin would know, he’s waiting for it, the one, his twin flame. Jimin has done casual dating, but I think when it comes to his S/O, he would know it was serious even before it got serious, he’d say it with confidence because inside he knows they love him too, he can feel it,*Yoongi voice* friggin’ psychics. I think he would want it to be a nice moment, like he would aim for it to come out at the right time, there have been times before where its almost slipped out, but he takes his S/O out one evening, not really on a date, but just “Come out with me?” a good ol’ evening stroll around a park, its dark, no one else is really there, but the stars are and it’s perfect, “You know, there’s a theory that soulmates are people with souls containing stardust from the same star, born from the same constellation, I was always in love with the stars, and perhaps that why I’m in love with you.” (that was nearly too mushy for my own good I think my soul actually left my body but also if someone said that to me I would die on the spot jimin you fucking SAP.)

Tae is an old soul, he’s been around the block before, he knows what love feels like, he know’s what being in love feels like—he also knows what those feelings turning to ash in his hands feels like but that’s a whole different story. He would probably be in denial at first, pushing away the feelings, pushing away the fear, the vulnerability, the fine details, but his heart would ache in his chest because it’s right and he knows it, he feels things more strongly than humans, he would know as soon as it hit what that feeling was and what it means. I think he would be more casual with it, probably happen at home, during the evening, cuddled up on the couch by the fire place, maybe sitting at the piano just messing around, some soft moment like that, but I think in a moment, the mood would switch, and he would lock eyes, that heavy, dark gaze just laced with love, like drowning in warmth, and he would just drop it right then and there, no going back, “I’m in love with you.” (someone collect the pieces of my soul flying out of my chest, I am in shambles)

Now for our other trio, our slightly ,,, detached boys

Yoongi, once the cards fall where they may, ya know; they manage to break down his outer shell of smart ass, sarcastic, ‘I don’t care’ attitude, hurdle over his many attempts at deflecting any type of close bond, and take a jackhammer to that 10 foot concrete wall standing between them, him, and his feelings—it’ll still be a little delayed. Because now he let them in, he feels strongly about them, he cares a lot about them, and he’s terrified. (the dress on the wall hanging behind me just reflected in my screen and I about shit my pants just now thinking someone was standing behind me, just wanted to add that and let you know feusdf). He doesn’t want to ruin it, he doesn’t want to lose it, but he’s scared to progress, this is basically uncharted territory for him, he’s never been in love, he’s never allowed himself to have such vulnerable feelings. He would know how he feels, Tae would probably call him out on it, lecture him, talk him up, and try to nudge Yoongi into being honest with himself and his S/O but still Yoongi would be a nervous wreck, poor kid. He would see the opportunity and stumble into it head first, probably in a cute moment (?) where they’re just like existing an doing something together, I dunno why but the scene of them cooking came to mind, Yoongi likes to cook, he’d let them cook with him, they’d be cooking and in a moment, maybe his S/O asks him a cooking related question about a recipe, he comes over to look at the book, his S/O looks up at him to have him confirm what the book says, and as soon as they make eye contact, he crumbles, and it’s a rush of “iloveyou” and he sucks in a breath like he’s trying to take the words back in, but it’s too late, they heard it, and he’s so relieved when they say it back that he feels like his knees might give out. (ouch my soul I rllydkasf dsf OH MY GOD I love him holy SHIT)

Hoseok, my baby, he’s such a lovely little thing, but he’s afraid of his own feelings. He would probably develop feelings for this person through friendship first and once he realizes it he would be like ‘oh no oh no oh no ohnoohno’, he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship, he doesn’t want to acknowledge the feelings, he doesn’t want to make himself vulnerable, but every time he would look at them his chest would swell with two feelings; complete adoration and aching devastation. He adores them, loves their soul, their smile, the way the laugh, the way he feels with them, and it hurts because he feels all of this and he hates it, he loves them, but he can’t do that, no, no, they couldn’t love someone like him, he doesn’t deserve it, he’s broken, he’s different. And so he starts to distant himself, he wants out, he doesn’t like it anymore, his soul screams because the heart wants what it wants but he’s denying it that, and so that screaming begins to override that adoration and he starts to hate the fact he’s ruining it for himself. I feel like there would need to be an intervention, probably Jimin, says something to the other person, encourages them to go see Hoseok, go push him to tell them why he’s acting funky. And it comes out, along with some tears, he faces them, himself, his feelings, and it overwhelms him, and he cracks, but it works out and he’s shocked when the feelings are reciprocated. He learns how to love.

Namjoon, firstly, he’s married to his education and having an affair with his job, he’s a busy man, he doesn’t really have time to be in the dating scene or the getting close to people scene. But maybe he has a fellow student he gets close with, or a coworker, and it tumbles along from there. He’s intelligent, and emotionally intelligent, he’s pretty good as expressing himself and articulating himself, he’s good at gauging other people’s feelings, however, he’s a little dense and totally misses when people hit on him, but other than that—he’s solid. However, there’s one little thing stopping him, the skeleton in the closet, or should I say the animal in the closet. He has a hard enough time living with his full moon antics, he doesn’t want to introduce that to someone else, he doesn’t even know how to go about it, how do you tell someone “Yeah by the way, I need to disappear once a month, specifically on the full moon,” without them getting suspicious, he certainly couldn’t tell them, no, no, that wouldn’t go well, even if they did believe him, which is slim to none, it’s completely insane. But I think once he get’s comfortable with someone, he would certainly drop “I love you” before popping the werewolf card on them, but once he realizes how he feels, he would start to gauge how they feel, test the waters, watch how they act and what they say, to see if he can say it without getting shot down or seem like he’s moving too fast. He wants it to be naturally, he doesn’t want it to be over some dinner or something too staged, I think he would say it when he feels it. Maybe one day before he goes to disappear to work or whatever, keeps it causal, even though his heart is beating out of his chest, he’d kiss them on the cheek, “I’ll see you later, I love you.” And probably give a cheeky grin, but as soon as the door shuts, he scurries along, trying to distance himself from the apartment, and when he hears the door open up behind him he almost doesn’t stop, until he hears it back, and he’s sure he’s the happiest man alive in that moment.

But the casual theme here is that they would all want it to be relatively naturally, they don’t want something entirely staged or overdone.

Excuse me while I go curl up into a ball and DIE fedsjfkdjsfk

#asks #chaotic anon #ghoul gang #tagged; for future ref

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loucifieri · 6 years

Text

To Hell and Back (v3 HPA AU)

[Part 1]

It’s a bigger hot mess than the previous one lol

04/21/18 09:21PM

ShirogaNYEH: welcome back! previously, Akamatsu-san creates a group chat, Ouma-kun uses it to stir some shit and in the end, a subtle confession was made!

starlord: shirogane what the heck weve been chatting continuously

Maki Roll: yeah what are you even going on about

ShirogaNYEH: but it's not the same case with the audience

starlord: what audience??

Lord Panta: can we go back to my moment

chaotic lesbean: no go away

Lord Panta: ANYWAY

Lord Panta: is it true Saihara-chan??

Lord Panta: do you find me irresistible?

The Only Hope For Me Is You: I wouldn't use that adjective but yeah

The Only Hope For Me Is You: you're hard to ignore

Lord Panta: !!!!!!

The Only Hope For Me Is You: since you constantly demand attention

The Only Hope For Me Is You: You're like an annoying itch that just won't go away

starlord: ooooh SHOT DOWN

Treblemaker: Damn Shuichi-kun, didn't think you would be a harsh heartbreaker

Do You Believe In Magic: lol rip........

Maki Roll: good job saihara

Lord Panta: I

Lord Panta: …

Lord Panta: that's hot

dumb blonde slut: haha the purple twink is obviously a bottom

Lord Panta: bitch it takes one to know one :)

dumb blonde slut: eek n-no im not

starlord: he didnt even deny it

Robot Rights Activist: I backlogged and I seem to recall you express dissatisfaction over your assigned nickname, Iruma-san

Robot Rights Activist: Why haven't you changed it yet?

Lord Panta: coz she actually likes it, duh

dumb blonde slut: piss off cockichi

dumb blonde slut: awww kibs ur concerned!! i always knew u were in love with me

Robot Rights Activist: I do not.

Treblemaker: yeouch

starlord: so many crushed hearts tonite

Lord Panta: EAT SHIT AND DIE DUMB BLONDE SLUT

Treblemaker: Hey! No attacking!

Imma meme: you literally attacked me moments ago smh

Kork: This is a mess.

dumb blonde slut: dont get ur panties in a twist, idiot virgins

dumb blonde slut: the great iruma miu is too gorgeous 2 be affected by this shit

dumb blonde slut: im hella gay anyway

chaotic lesbean: you go Iruma-san!!

Robot Rights Activist: Still, I apologize if I came across as rude in any way! It was not my intention.

dumb blonde slut: dont beat urself too much over it kibs

Treblemaker: Aww Iruma-san really has a soft spot for Idabashi-kun

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Uh, Kaede-san, I assume you have your headphones on because I've been knocking on your door for awhile now and you haven't shifted from your position to indicate that you will answer the door.

ShirogaNYEH: truly a detective,,,

Treblemaker: oh shit sorry!!

chaotic lesbean: AND WHAT IS A DEGENERATE LIKE YOU DOING IN THE FEMALE AREA OF THE DORM THIS LATE AT NIGHT

Treblemaker: It's fine Chabashira-san!! Shuichi-kun usually comes over so we can gossip or whatever

chaotic lesbean: WHAT??? USUALLY??????

Maki Roll: wow Saihara, you managed to sneak past chabashira several times already, im impressed

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Thank you Harukawa-san! I feel validated.

Lord Panta: is there really NOTHING going on between you two

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Kaede-san is my bestfriend??

Treblemaker: Yeah, why does that bother you so much Ouma-kun?

Kork: He likely feels envious of your relationship.

Lord Panta: lol no

starlord: sure jan

Lord Panta: quick question what are yall sexual orientations

imma meme: im fabulously gay

chaotic lesbean: isn't it obvious

dumb blonde slut: dont have 2 repeat myself

Do You Believe In Magic: ace...... sexual attraction is tiring.........

ShirogaNYEH: same!!

Kork: as am I.

Treblemaker: Actually, I'm Bi but I tend to prefer girls

starlord: well since were being honest ok im bi too

Maki Roll: same

Gokuhara Gonta: Gonta loves all!! And Hoshi-kun says he's Ace!

Treblemaker: Gonta-kun, it's getting really late. You and Hoshi-kun should start heading back here.

Gokuhara Gonta: Of course, Akamatsu-san!

Imma meme: spoken like another mom

Treblemaker: >:(

Robot Rights Activist: My attraction is not affected by one's sexual orientation

bitch I am the WAY: Angie is pan!~

The Only Hope For Me Is You: I'm gay

Lord Panta: YES!!!!

Maki Roll: wow he was not subtle AT ALL

Treblemaker: What about you @Mother Knows Best?

imma meme: why do you want to know (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)

Treblemaker: It wouldn't be fair to leave out someone from a question addressed to everyone!

Treblemaker: also, another word amami and im bashing your head with a shot put ball

ShirogaNYEH: go get em Akamatsu-san!

imma meme: im having war flashbacks

Mother Knows Best: Thank you for your consideration, Akamatsu-san. Apologies for not replying the soonest as I had to attend to some last minute errands. To answer your query, my preference is of the same sex.

Lord Panta: okay cool thank you for your input everyone!!!

Maki Roll: you only wanted to know one person's tho

dumb blonde slut: how about bull balls what do u think his orientation is

starlord: are you referring to great gozu??

dumb blonde slut: yea dumbass

dumb blonde slut: oh fuck those huge man tits,,,

dumb blonde slut: annsd heds a wretslerr he g ets all sewaTYyna d

chaotic lesbean: OK TENKO HAS HEARD ENOUGH

Maki Roll: Iruma shut the fuck up

bitch I am the WAY: Angie hears moaning again and it is very disturbing~~

Treblemaker: To think our rooms are billed as soundproof...

The Only Hope For Me Is You: I am effectively traumatized tonight.

ShirogaNYEH: we need to take this up with the headmaster!!

imma meme: uhhh its kinda weird to explain how we discovered the walls arent entirely soundproof

imma meme: “our classmate was masturbating too loudly to thoughts about our homeroom teacher's man boobs”

Kork: Let us not prolong this discussion. Can someone take care of that horrid excuse of a human being.

bitch I am the WAY: oh, she has stopped

bitch I am the WAY: Ah, Angie hears loud noises of struggle

bitch I am the WAY: then some shuffling outside the hallway

bitch I am the WAY: it is dead quiet now

chaotic lesbean: what just happened

chaotic lesbean: Tenko was terrified to peek outside

Treblemaker: Harukawa-san we talked about this

Maki Roll: what? I didn't kill her

Hoshi Ryoma: yo

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Hello Hoshi-kun

Hoshi Ryoma: just got back in the dorm with gokuhara

Hoshi Ryoma: he want back to his room but

Hoshi Ryoma: im still in the lounge room rn

Hoshi Ryoma: im seein tojo with a gagged and immobile iruma wrapped in a blanket being dragged across the room to the front door

Hoshi Ryoma: tojo just dumped her out

Lord Panta: NISHISHISHI PUNISHMENT TIME

chaotic lesbean: :O

imma meme: what an ICON

Treblemaker: woah thats hot

bitch I am the WAY: she is doing Atua's work~~

Mother Knows Best: I was merely disposing of the trash.

Do You Believe In Magic: …..tnx mom........

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Best mom!

starlord: shouldn't that include ouma tho

Lord Panta: suck my dick spaceman

Robot Rights Activist: Language!

Lord Panta: da hell keeboy it wasnt even that crass

Gokuhara Gonta: Oh no! What has been going on here, friends?

chaotic lesbean: NOTHING! PLEASE CARRY ON WITH YOUR NORMAL NIGHTLY ROUTINE

starlord: hey gonta, buddy, do me a favor and dont backlog

Gokuhara Gonta: Alright, Momota-kun!

ShirogaNYEH: Gonta-kun should not be tainted in any way!!

ShirogaNYEH: we should probably let Iruma-san inside now though

Lord Panta: are you in league with the DEVOL

Maki Roll: not like you're any better

Mother Knows Best: Very well. I suppose she has learned her lesson, at least for this moment.

Imma meme: well this was wild

Treblemaker: Let's not talk about this ever again

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Group chats tend to spiral down into levels of insanity the longer we spend time in it

Kork: Might I suggest a more... family-friendly topic?

Treblemaker: What is it, Shinguji-kun?

Kork: Ghosts in Hope's Peak

starlord: FUCK NO

bitch I am the WAY: hmmm what about nicknames for Gonta and Ryoma!~

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Good idea, Angie-san

Gokuhara Gonta: Oh yes! Gonta is excited on what name friends will gift him!

Imma meme: okay we better not fuck this up then

Lord Panta: allow me~

Maki Roll removed Lord Panta from the chat

starlord: lol sniped again

imma meme: DEADT

chaotic lesbean: noone must ruin this special moment!!

Do You Believe In Magic changed Gokuhara Gonta to Good Noodle

imma meme: yumeno-san is our name-changing cryptid

Good Noodle: Thank you Yumeno-san! Gonta loves this nickname!

ShirogaNYEH: im,,, CRYING

chaotic lesbean: you're doing amazing, sweetie

Do You Believe In Magic changed Hoshi Ryoma to quail egg

ShirogaNYEH: s m o l b e a n

quail egg: NO

imma meme: hoshi-kun can literally punt us to the sun let's not baby him

starlord: not to mention that hes got a deeper voice than the rest of us guys

starlord: its so manly

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Momota-kun, your gay is showing

Treblemaker: Yay! Now everyone's got a nickname.

Treblemaker: We should probably add Ouma-kun back here.

quail egg: respectfully disagree

chaotic lesbean: you are too nice akamatsu-san!!!

ShirogaNYEH: funny how we somehow end up kicking Ouma-kun out the chat then add him later towards the end of the chapter...

starlord: ????

Treblemaker added Lord Panta to the chat.

Do You Believe In Magic changed Lord Panta to notto disu shitto agen

notto disu shitto again: i feel loved

dumb blonde slut: THE GREAT IRUMA MIU IS BACK YA DUMB VIRGINS

Maki Roll: fuck go back

Kork: This is the 10th Circle of Hell.

Mother Knows Best: I would like to inform everyone that the time is now five minutes past eleven in the evening. I believe this is the ideal time for all of us to get some rest as we have a class on Physical Education early morning.

Imma meme: omg I hate PE

notto disu shitto agen: but moooooom

Mother Knows Best: All of you go to sleep or I will not make breakfast for everyone tomorrow.

notto disu shitto agen: okay okay jeez

dumb blonde slut: yes mommy

starlord: aight mom

bitch I am the WAY: Apparently, Angie must postpone here sacrificial ritual tonight~~

ShirogaNYEH: awww I wont binge watch anime tonight then

Do You Believe In Magic: ….....good nyt...................

chaotic lesbean: Sleep well yumeno-chan <3

Do You Believe In Magic: …...........nyeh <3

Good Noodle: Goodnight everyone!

quail egg: night

dumb blonde slut: nyt cocksuckers

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Good night, all!

notto disu shitto agen: hey saihara-chan are you back at your room can i come over :v

The Only Hope For Me Is You: nah I'm sleeping over Kaede-san's tonight

notto disu shitto agen: WHAT

chaotic lesbean: WHAT

Mother Knows Best: Saihara-san, I am afraid I will have to escort you out. Now.

Imma meme: oof

nickname guide notto disu shitto agen: Ouma The Only Hope For Me Is You: Saihara Treblemaker: Akamatsu bitch I am the WAY: Yonaga starlord: momota shirogaNYEH: shirogane Mother Knows Best: tojo imma meme: amami Maki Roll: harukawa Do You Believe In Magic: yumeno chaotic lesbean: chabashira Kork: shinguji Robot Rights Activist: idabashi dumb blonde slut: iruma Good Noodle: gokuhara quail egg: hoshi

NDRV3 HPA AU Character Design Masterlist here and background information here [Facebook] [Instagram] [Twitter] [Blogger] [Kofi]

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