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moonstruck-poet · 6 months

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For All Time

Pairing - Loki x fem!reader

Summary - the reader was Loki's bestfriend since childhood until teenage and he was in love with her but maybe they were just never meant to be.

Warnings - death

Requested by - @akshinayak I reaally hope it was good enough and tysm for the request!

They say breaking up with your partner hurts the most. That's not true, Loki thought to himself. They say falling out of love hurts the most. That's not true, he thought.

"What really hurt-" he whispered to himself and clenched his jaw. His crown of long, black horns feeling a lot burdensome. "-Is knowing that you would've had a chance, would've had a future together. But you didn't. All because of your own selfish reasons and insecurities".

He scoffed, leaning back onto his new throne, one that he ironically had no intentions of wanting and gripped the handle.

The frustration about himself melting away to make way for deep, agonizing pain and heartbreak as he caught onto a thread of your lifeline.

Loki's lips were tightly pressed together when he decided to watch over you, something that he had done last night itself. He couldn't help himself, seeing as your condition was deteriorating day by day.

With a deep sigh leaving his lungs, he closed his eyes, head leaning back against the throne as a certain memory drifted into focus. Putting everything else on hold.

"Fancy any one of them, do you?" Your playful voice asked when he looked at various pictures of princesses.

"Absolutely not," he slammed the last one on the table.

"Pity. I would've loved to see my best friend getting married".

Best Friend. He gritted his teeth, running a hand through the long locks and looking out of the window. That's all he would ever be. A best friend. Nothing more. Never.

Despite being able to sense emotions and read people well, the God of Mischief failed to recognise your feelings. He somehow never took notice of your lingering touches, of your constant staring and looking at him as though he had hung the stars."

Do you have anyone in your mind Loki?" You asked quietly and stood next to him. His emerald irises clashing against your golden-brown ones. "You can tell me, you know?"

You. Its always been you.

He wanted to scream it out loud, wanted to yell and make the whole world know the fact that it was you whom he had fallen for.

"There's no one," he answered abruptly and completely avoided your gaze, and in the meanwhile also not noticing the way your eyes seemed to dull.

He had loathed himself for every passing second after that incident. How different would life have been had he confessed his feelings right then?

He would still have to go through everything, but at least he could've had you right by his side. And that alone would've made all the difference in the world.

He swallowed the misery before regaining control and finally looking at you from high above. But in an instant his facade broke, face contorting in pain upon seeing your weak and frail body. A startling contrast to the strong and regal woman that you had once been.

"Oh my love," he whispered to himself, his eyes raking over every little change that had taken place in the short course of twenty four hours.

You had injured yourself, heavily. A group of oursiders had somehow managed to invade your territory, catching everyone off guard and naturally you had taken the lead.

Fighting alongside Lady Sif and your husband, Alvis.

Another painful wound struck his heart when he saw the said person entering your room, his face drowned in sorrow and desperation.

"How are you, my queen?" Alvis sat down next to her.. Next to his queen, Loki said in his mind.

"I am fine," you smiled back, your expression the epitome of exhaustion.

"Rest, yes?" He said and took her hands in his, caressing the skin. "I will be back soon enough, have to go through some work".

Loki watched as you barely managed to nod, he watched as your loving husband pressed a kiss on your forehead, something that he was supposed to do.

A harsh breath escaped his throat and he let go of the branch, his heart not being able to see its other half being in immense pain.

He had no rights, absolutely none to want himself to be in the place of your husband. He was selfish, arrogant, entitled, pessimistic whereas Alvis was the complete opposite.

You had found yourself a man who loved and worshipped you exactly the way you were supposed to be. He could've never been able to do that. You deserved someone so much better than him. Always.

"Would it be so bad, hmm?" You questioned softly, searching his eyes for an answer.

"I fail to understand what you are talking about," he muttered and looked anywhere but at you.

"I think you understand perfectly enough".

He didn't answer and walked away, because what else was he supposed to do?

"Is the idea how us getting merried so bad that you can't even look at me?" You asked, a small smile on your face.

"I did not say that".

"You surely implied that".

"I-" he cut himself off and turned to face you, his expression holding anger. "I do not wish to get married," he stated, his eyes glaring into yours but you were barely fazed.

"Okay," was all you could say and Loki immediately noticed the way your face changed drastically. You tried to offer him a smile, but for once he saw right through that.

"Okay," you repeated again, backing away from him, taking one step at a time which lead to a huge barrier between the two.

He merely watched you leave, rooted the spot. He probably didn't know it, but he had lost you at that moment. Not as friends no, you would always continue being friends. No one in the universe could possibly break one of the strongest bonds between two people.

"I love you," he whispered to the now empty room, falling down to his knees as a lone tear slipped down his cheek. "Always".

Loki let out a bitter laugh at the memories. Out of all the things he could've said, he uttered the most bitter lies.

He was a changed man now. He replayed all those moments in his head, being able to see all the chances that he had lost. Seeing just how hurt you had been from every selfish comment he had made.

What would he give to go back and change everything instantly.

It was unfathomable, the amount of love his entire being held for simply one person. Nobody ever came close, and never would. He may have been a narcissist, an arrogant liar, a tricking asshole.

But there was one thing that nobody else could do other than him. And that was to love you, adore you in such a way that a mere hiccup in your life caused him pain. To care for you like you held his lifeline in your rough, scarred, but soft hands. To want you in a way that nobody had done before.

Because that's how Loki has. If he loved someone, he loved them enough to terrify himself about the lengths he would go for, namely for the person's happiness.

He had done so countless of times for you, and unknown to him, you had cherished every single minute of those special occasions. Keeping them so close to your heart that they bloomed whenever you were happy and blocked your breathing when you were devastated.

He was lost in thought, but a sudden tug in his chest pulled him out. Loki frowned at the strange feeeling, his intuiton telling him something terrible had happened.

His breathing quickened as he gripped the branch, your branch, noticing the fading green light causing sweat to erupt on his forehead and neck.

"No, no no no," he chanted, feeling as though the world had collapsed upon seeing the scene in front of him. "No," he whispered, heart slowly but surely shattering.

He watched Alvis, tapping your cheek frantically and gently shaking your body as he yelled for the doctors to be brought. "Stay with me, my queen. The doctors are coming, please, stay with me!"

Sif was on your other side, holding one of your hand in hers, pressing the back to her lips. "I'm sorry," she whispered in between tears as her body shook.

Your face, Loki saw and swallowed. It was still as beautiful as ever. Those golden-brown eyes that made him catch his breath everytime he glanced your way, those sharp eyebrows arching whenever you narrowed your eyes playfully and that gorgeous smile that you presently held.

"I'm okay," you croaked out, "I'm alright".

The two people surrounding you simply cried harder at that, bowing their heads and pressing the back of your hand to their temple. Their way of paying respect to the bravest warrior they'd seen.

Loki's chest felt empty, as though his heart too was slowly dying, following his soulmate to the afterlife. Silent tears were flowing down his cheeks without a halt. There was only one thing he could think of to do now and he did just that.

Your eyes were half open, understanding that your end was nearing soon and you didn't have any regrets. You had lived a beautiful life inspite of the hardships.

But then a sudden warmth made you open your eyes completely for one last time. Your head tilted to see the rays of light gushing in through the open window, bathing your entire body in its glow.

You didn't fail to notice the green tint that was present and your heart skipped a beat, despite already being in a fragile state. "Loki," you whispered, your voice barely audible but the one who needed to hear it heard his name clearly.

And you took your final breath, a content smile on your face as your eyes closed.

His soul shattered next, everything suddenly feeling cold all of a sudden as he slumped back in his throne, breathing heavily and swallowing harshly.

"Rest easy, my love. I will love you, for all time, always," he said to the skies.

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#loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki x female reader #marvel fanfiction #loki fanfction #loki angst #loki x oc #loki x reader angst #loki laufeyson #loki odinson

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peachdelta · 7 months

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hey do you like robots. if so can you share your favorites

i’m assuming this means robots from other media and not my own HAHA

if mythra and pyra count they might be my favourite fictional characters of all time, same with malos and A/alvis, i love you trinity processor i would do anything for you trinity processor please text me back trinity processor. i could talk about these three for all fucking time you have no idea how much i like mythra and pyra they’re such insanely compelling characters that have so much potential. i’m also a sucker for ino’s WACKY fucking design her head is WAY too big for her body i love her. poppi xenoblade deserved better. i love her dearly.

im always a big fan of megaman (especially mmx and the protomen), i loved so many of the characters in command mission a LOT. command mission dub is so fucking camp i will die on this hill it’s great. i’m also a fan of copy x by proxy of a close friend being obsessed with him.

elster from signalis might be the hottest woman i’ve ever seen in my life. that scene where she’s shoving the new arm onto her shoulder and she looks all broad made me feel things.

i have very strong feelings about fi from loz. she holds a very dear place in my heart and has since i was a kid

TURING WEBBER. i cannot possibly recommend playing 2064 read only memories enough. turing is the most delightful character on earth

the three marathon AIs are insanely compelling. i love you leela i love you tycho i love you DURANDAL!!!!!!!! i have so many strong feelings about durandal. i am not smart enough to analyze marathon that much. i like staring into the abyss of marathon infinity’s timeline like i could ever hope to understand any of it. i have much smarter mutuals than me that can do that.

honourable mentions: glados, bonbon idv, ai uwasa magia record, (SPOILERS) professor layton and the azran legacy, tobor mysims, metal sonic, star dream, roni trauma team, all of the iron (x) pokemon, hatsune miku et al, v1, v2, mirage, all the ultrakill bots, wx-78

#delta.txt #i probably forgot some. im just naming ones off the top of my head

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valbellepeche · 8 months

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**SPOILERS for Xenogears and all of Xenoblade except X**

I wanted to talk about how some xenoblade characters and elements (specifically the trinity processor) parallel parts of gears and saga. Beginning with xenoblade 1:

Alvis serves the role of both the Zohar and the wave existence within the story of Xenoblade 1. He is the power source for the demiurge that creates a cycle of destruction and recreation (Zanza/Deus) while also connecting with the protagonist and eventually allowing him to defeat the demiurge. The term "Monado" is directly derived from the Monad, which is the Zohar and wave existence are partially based on. At the end of the game, Alvis appears as a glowing green cross, extremely similar to how the wave existence appears in Xenogears.

The Monado III is very similar to the role of Xenogears (the gear) being the final form of the protagonists weapon after they make contact with Alvis/the wave existence. Alvis's line "I was here at the beginning, and I will proclaim the end." calls back to the bible verse which is the first thing you see in Xenogears, "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last." In the context of Xenogears' opening scene this is associated with Deus. (More on this later)

In both stories they drive the protagonist forward to defeat the final antagonist, creating a world where people are free to live without some god, oppressive government or religious structure deciding for them. The main thing that separates Alvis and the WE is that the WE acts in order to free itself from the Zohar, whereas Alvis, as the facilitator of the world, wants it to cease stagnation. Future Redeemed recontexualizes this slightly by saying he embodied Klaus's regrets.

Xenoblade 2:

Xenoblade 2 formally introduces the trinity processor as well as the actual Zohar. Being computers linked to the Zohar, the trinity processor is similar to Xenogears' Kadomony.

The way Pyra is found resting in the Ancient Ship is a reference to when Abel awakens Elhaym in Xenogears

Elhaym was created in response to Abel's desire for a mother figure, the way blades reflect their driver could be seen as similar.

More on Logos and Pneuma in a bit.

Xenoblade 3 (Primarily Future Redeemed):

Future Redeemed is what got me thinking about all this in the first place. Given the prevalence of Ontos and that it takes two forms, as well as the other parts of the trinity processor having relevance, there's a lot to talk about.

The first form Ontos takes in Future Redeemed is Alpha. He has the appearance of Alvis, but with Zanza's wing(s) and he wields the Monado I (which is also Zanza's). Zanza's influence is an intentional contradiction with Alpha's driving force of extinguishing the past for the sake of the future, and also alludes to how he takes the role of Deus, which Zanza held in Xenoblade 1. Zanza's angelic motif is contrasted by Z symbolizing the devil. Alpha's goal is to take the life of the City to a new world, which is very similar to how Deus acted to return to Earth. This connection is made obvious with Alpha's second phase being obviously inspired by Deus's final form.

This brings the whole "I was here at the beginning, and I will proclaim the end." thing full circle, what with Deus being associated with the ALPHA and Omega verse. Additionally, Xenosaga's expy is called Omega so it all fits together nicely.

If Alpha is representative of Deus, then Na'el fills the role of Miang. Both are women who act in order to achieve the goal of Deus/Alpha. What makes Na'el different is that it's at least partially coming from her own will, whereas Miang fully takes over women's bodies.

In Xenogears, Kadomony is composed of 3 parts, the Persona, Anima, and Animus. The Persona is what created the original Elhaym alongside Miang. Na'el is connected to Ontos and parallels Miang, which leaves the final aspect of Ontos in Future Redeemed, A, to be Elhaym. A is separated from Alpha by Ghondor's desire for a future that's the best for everyone, once again being similar to how Elhaym is created. A also states that they are composed of Alvis's memories with Shulk which is a similar type of thing.

Future Redeemed states that Ontos acts as an arbiter between Logos and Pneuma, using their input to make decisions. Without the complete Trinity Processor, Ontos cannot function properly. This feels very reminiscent of Xenogears' theme of becoming whole, and also Deus needing all of its different parts to accomplish its goals. Alpha is only defeated when the powers of Pneuma and Logos (at least symbolically) come together again.

Side note: this fantastic video by PhantomHeit talks about the trinity processor and speculates that Zanza and Meyneth may have stood in for Logos and Pneuma in Xenoblade 1.

youtube

Future Redeemed establishes Pneuma and Logos as intrinsically feminine and masculine respectively, granting credence to them representing Anima and Animus. This isn't the only thing pointing to this, Malos's battle theme in Torna the Golden Country is called "Over Despair and Animus". Nia's weapon in Xenoblade 3 is called the Anima Sword, which could relate to the 2 phantom Aegis swords that float behind her or that she created the Ouroboros power which allows Matthew to access Pneuma.

In Xenogears Animus takes the form of the Gazel Ministry, antagonists who wish to obtain the Anima Relics to become complete, not unlike Malos needing Pyra/Mythra to repair his broken core.

In the climax of Future Redeemed, everything comes together, not just the Trinity Processor, but also Keves, Agnus, and even Moebius to complete the power of Ouroboros and oust Alpha and -redeem- the future if you will. Humans joining together to create a future they can live freely in is a frequently recurring theme in Xeno, and it's a fitting end for this chapter of the series.

#xenoblade #xenogears #future redeemed #alvis xenoblade #trinity processor

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cyber-neptune · 5 months

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Late night over analysation of Megatron and why I HC him as having BPD (2)

— From me (someone with BPD) and Alvie ( @alcorian ) who gladly listened to my weirdly written ramble lol

‼️Please note that im not a professional and I have difficulty expressing/explaining stuff. A lot of these things were also written at around 3-4am‼️

Tw : Mention of self-harm and drug use

First post over here : X

Anyway, let's get back into it.

6-Extreme emotional swings

7-Chronic feelings of emptiness

8-Explosive anger

This one is pretty self explanatory. Megatron struggles with his anger, it's intense and explosive and he can't always calm down. He loses control and gets aggressive, be it voluntary or not. It's mostly showed outward in many shows but almost never shown inward.

Except in the comics. Which is something I appreciate (from the scraps ive been able to read and other stuff written about comic Megs), Megatron isn't always angry at other people. He's angry at himself for everything.

9-Feeling suspicious or out of touch with reality

Being suspicious of everyone around him and paranoia are some pretty obvious things about Megatron. He's always had to be wary about everyone in his surroundings due to the way he's lived most of his life ; by never knowing when or who could kill him if he wasn't paying attention. He's never lived, he's always survived.

Due to all the stress he's accumulated (listen, you can't tell me im wrong about him being stressed), I can imagine Megatron disassociating from time to time. Be it during meetings or alone in his room, he'll disassociate.

Im losing a bit of inspiration/brain power to write so ill leave it at that.

#Zero speaks ☆#long post #megatron #headcanon #transformers #maccadam

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doktorpeace · 1 year

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I finished Xenoblade Chronicles: Future Redeemed

All in all absolutely phenomenal experience. Truly a visionary and audacious way to end such a popular series. Thematically resonant through to the end and well earned in the resolution it goes for. Beyond this I'm going to put a read more, under which will contain spoilers for the entire Xeno- franchise. That means Gears, Saga Episodes I-III, Chronicles 1-3, and X. I have a lot of thoughts and plenty more marinating to do, but these are my initial impressions.

Somehow managing to connect all of the Xeno- series not to AUs but canonically the same Prime Earth, which contextually is Our Earth is RIDICULOUS in how he pulled it off. It feels truly organic to all of the stories *AND* doesn't contradict any of them! It even, seemingly, directly ties into the beginning of X with it being 'May 23rd, 2022'. Elma arrived on Earth in the early 2020s and I believe she's that blue dot we see flying onto the Earth at the end of the credits.

Smashing all of those different FTL/Outer Space Colonization projects into a single radio broadcast in the background of just one cutscene is truly remarkable. Just a few lines recontextualizes this man's entire career.

And also, to those in the know, it reveals that all three of them: The Earthlife Colonization Project (Xenogears) The Immigrant Fleet (Xenosaga) and Project Exodus (Xenoblade X)

Occur due to Zohar related experiments gone horrifically wrong. Which we know from each series individually. But knowing that all of them stem from a single post-scarcity, conflict-free, truly equitable and globalized Earth, which nonetheless kept on trying different experiments with these godlike processors and all of them went awry is really interesting.

This game in particular very much focuses on the idea that advancement and power and control for their own sake are meaningless. If you don't have an idea behind it, if you don't want to make things the world tangibly better it's pointless.

Future Redeemed successfully ties every Xeno- game into this theme directly, no matter how subtle they are about it in their own content.

The Chronicles games happened solely because Klaus wanted to play God and make a new universe he would control, using The Zohar.

Gears happened because The Gazel Ministry wanted to create a creature that matched the Biblical God in terms of ability which they could control.

The Saga games happened because people wanted this power for transhumanism, to perfectly control the genes and births of every person, to ignore the realities of death and disease, but in doing so became so entrenched in making literal Designer Babies that it cuts off natural human diversity and reduces the people born to mere products and instruments shilled by different companies with different patents.

And all of these happened from The Zohar, a processor/machine mind that far outstrips anything humanity can believe. A thing which the humans of Earth only discovered by chance. Being meddled with purely out of avarice and hubris. The humans of that Earth didn't need any of those things. They'd already accomplished a perfect, post scarcity world. And that's why Alvis, a machine who's sole purpose is to be the logical arbiter between two other AI, when left to his own devices, decided going back to that would be best, no matter the cost.

He saw all of the tragedies in the three Chronicles settings that occurred solely due to Klaus' hubris and realized none of it would happen if these humans, the ones who've only known strife and difficulty and pain, had access to that post scarcity, conflict free, equitable world and beyond this, Takahashi buries the lede a little bit.

All of those previously mentioned projects to get humans off of earth. They're all cover ups by the Coalition Government of Earth. They're all touted as great advancements for human progress and potential but in actuality they're all just covering up massive, horrific, failures which would each result in the destruction of the Earth and its people. It's just Klaus' mistake had such immediate and tremendous consequences it couldn't be covered up.

Everything was destroyed in an instant. And we see, in Gears and Saga, that those decisions still ultimately do lead to an unimaginable amount of human suffering, just not on Earth. All they've done is ship off that suffering, literally, to some far reach of space.

Underpinning all of this is a distrust in the government and their motivations. A distrust for authority who claims they only want best for you.

Which is why Fei returns to living a quaint life. It's why Shion and Kos-Mos return to their normal. It's why Shulk refuses to become a god. It's why Rex and Pneuma live simple lives. And it's why Noah throws away the Sword of the End.

Each has the chance to become an ultimate authority, to have complete dominion over the lives of countless others, and they all give that up to just be...human. This franchise is truly something special. I cannot wait to see what comes next.

Please, Takahashi. Let us go back to Mira now.

Thank you, truly, @andawarmgeek, for sending me a download code out of the blue for Future Redeemed. This was an experience that I won't soon forget.

#Xenoblade #Xenosaga #Xenogears #Spoilers

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lizzyk137 · 1 year

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I'm All Yours - A Chani Fanfic (Chani X Reader)

Description: You and Chani get paired for a school project. When the project material starts to ignite secret feelings between you two, what will happen when your project is finished? Warning: Absolutely none, just pure fluff and love :3 Materials mentioned: Jane Austen's Persuasion, Mamma Mia's 'Lay All Your Love on Me', Dirty Dancing's 'I've Had the Time of My Life' dance scene.

Want to read more, visit my Masterlist!

"Okay, drama nerds! Please welcome your new classmates for the rest of the semester!" Mrs. Elven announced as she made her way down the aisle to the stage area. "Classes have been meshed this semester with our writing friends so they can get an idea on how to write for those preforming on stage, tv or movies, along with getting better feelers out for how things get imagined in our minds when we read." She pointed to her head for affect.

"Along with the switch for this semester, we will be switching next semester also. You will all be writing together so you can get a feel for what a good script is and how the writer wants the characters to feel so when you act you can better understand what you're portraying." Mr. Alvis stepped in next.

"You'll be partnered up with one person from each class to help each other better understand the other's major. Now each class will still have one class each week away from each other to focus on our own curriculum. Mr. Alvis will call out partners, please stand up, find each other and introduce yourselves."

"Ally and Cole, Sam and David, Mark and John, Tyra and Annebelle." Mr. Alvis started calling off names, and you squirmed in your seat, nervous of who you would be paired up with. You took this class because you loved writing and a good challenge while writing, but acting was something new to you and something that you knew you weren't good at.

"Chani and Y/N." Mr. Alvis called, and you stood up and looked around to find a tall, attractive boy standing up in the front row looking around.

His brown eyes caught yours, and he gave you a small wave and made his way over to you. You sat down, smoothing your skirt, nervous about what you got yourself into. You took a deep breath in and turned to look at one of the most handsomest guys you've ever seen.

He was tall, with kind brown eyes, a bright smile that made you warm inside, and sturdy but thin build. His brown hair was short, but his bangs hung almost into his eyes. He smiled more, showing off a perfect row of teeth that made your stomach go a flutter.

"Hi, I'm Chani. It's nice to meet you!" His head tilted at the end so cutely, making the butterlfies in your stomach freak out even more.

You gave a small wave and a nervous smile. "Hi, I'm Y/N."

Chani dropped his bag and sat down next to you. "So, are you excited to be learning everything there is to know about theater?"

"Kind of," you said while nervously playing with your hands. "I'm a bit nervous. I've never done anything like this before. I'm not one to really put myself out there."

"Ah, well, I'll help you through it. If you have any questions, just ask! I'm more than happy to help, plus the theater teacher is great at helping you get over any nerves you have."

"That's good to know. How about you with the writing assignment next semester?"

He shrugged and gave a grimace. "I know it won't go too well for me. I'm not exactly great at creating words."

"Well, like you said, you can always ask if you have any questions."

You both smiled at each other, and then silence filled in the rest of the convo. It wasn't awkward but it wasn't comfortable either and you sat there clutching your skirt waiting for the end of class to draw near.

"I heard there are three different scenes that we need to preform. They're short, possibly five minutes for each scene which is good but they can range from different topics or different types of things a performer may do, like singing or dancing." Chani whispered, while you both took notes on the course direction and what was required for you to pass.

You looked at him scared. Dancing? Singing? You could barely tell a lie, how were you supposed to do all three things in the course of a few months?

Chani offered you smile as he watched your face turn to panic. "Don't worry, they'll prepare you for it all beforehand but i guess we get our scenes within a few weeks."

You nodded and went back to trying to pay attention to as much as you could from Mrs. Elven's lecture on theater. You needed to be prepared as much as you could for the amount of stress the next few weeks was going to bring.

"Alright, pair up and we'll be going around and handing out your scenes and explaining them."

"Now theater kids, you will be letting our new friends take the lead on the everything, while you are directing and helping." Mrs. Elven explained.

Mr. Alvis continued where Mrs. Elven left off. "Throughout the course of the next few weeks you will be practicing and perfecting your scenes under the guidance of myself and Mrs. Elven. Schedules will be posted to let you know when we will be reviewing your progress."

You spotted Chani on the steps of the stage talking to a few of the theater girls and your slowly made your way over there. Chani was nice but he didn't go out his way to get to know you the past few weeks of lectures. You noticed he was more interested in his friends or staying by himself than he was with you, and you were just too shy to go over and start up a conversation. You passed each test so far with flying colours and you were hoping you'd be able to do the same physically all while praying that Chani would help you out.

"Oh, hey, Y/N." Chani said as he spotted you lingering near the front row." He got up and leaped down the stairs with ease. "Are you excited to see what we got for our scenes?"

You nodded and gave a smile smile. Words didn't come easily to you when Chani was involved you've noticed and you could tell it was putting him off by the awkward silence that always followed.

"Chani, Y/N, good I found you. I gathered up some great scenes for you." Mrs. Elven said as she rustled through to find a greeen folder with both of your names written on the top. "Now, Chani, I know you're great at what you do when it comes to a happy or serious scene but I have yet to see you do romance."

"Wait, I can do romance." Chani spoke up defensively.

"Not that I've seen, nor have I seen it in person yet from you. And I hear that miss Y/N, enjoys a good romance story and that Jane Austen is a favourite of yours. So open up and see what you got." She gave you the green folder and you opened it up to find a piece of paper detailing your topics and scenes.

Topic One: Musical- Lay All Your Love On Me (Mamma Mia Musical)

Topic Two: Dance- I've Had The Time of My Life (Dirty Dancing Dance Scene)

Topic Three: Acting- Persuasion's Letter Confession Scene (Jane Austen)

"Wait these are all love scenes, Mrs. E." Chani exclaimed as he took the folder from you looking at the rest of the material in it.

"Why, yes it is. It's supposed to be challenging and a learning opportunity for my students. Have fun, my lovelies!"

You watched her walk away while Chani quietly complained to himself as he looked over the material.

"Great, class is basically over. Let me research these scenes and next class we'll start learning, okay?" Chani gathered up his bag and walked away before you couold say anything.

This is awesome, you thought, you're stuck doing love scenes with someone who clearly does not enjoy doing them all while you learn a new skill set so you can pass your class this semester. Welcome to hell.

The next two weeks where absolute shit, constant studying on your part to get the dance down while trying to protray a confession to someone who stares at you with annoyance as you fumble everything anf that's not even including the singing lessons that he quickly gives. You really needed this class to pass so you could keep your scholarship and with two weeks of barely getting nowhere, you were starting to get pissed off.

Setting your bag down on the dance studio's floor, you connected your phone to the stereo's bluetooth and put on your small heeled shoes. You didn't let it on but Dirty Dancing was one of your favourite movies and you wanted to do it justice. You had gathered from the costume department an outfit that was similar to Baby's and you were hoping it would channel your inner Patrick Swayze.

Turning on the song, you closed your eyes and started dancing by yourself as you remembered each move that was created during the movie all while remembering Chani's notes and tips.

The song slowly ended and your eyes flashed opened to the sound of clapping behind you. You quickly twirled around to find Chani leaning against the door frame smiling. "Chani! You scared me!"

"You did really good. I'm impressed to see you practicing on your own." He said as he walked over to you.

"Well, I need to pass this class in order to graduate and keep my scholarship." You said irriated that he didn't think you'd actually take this class seriosuly, unlike him who was clearly uninterested during class.

"Oh."

"I haven't gotten much help so far, so I've been learning on my own."

"I haven't been a great teacher the past couple of weeks have I?" He sat down next to you as you wiped off some sweat on a small towel.

"Not really."

He sighed and leaned back on his palms. "I just don't get romance. I've never really liked anyone so I don't know how to feel it in order to protray it correctly."

"Really?" He looked at your shock face with some annoyance. "Don't think of me as rude but you're constantly flirting with the girls in class, so I figured you've must have been ina relationship."

"Nope. I just flirt to work on my presentation for auditions or characters, that's all. I have no feelings for any of them. In fact, most of them annoy me."

"I must annoy you a lot then with not knowing what to do." You laughed.

Chani chuckled, "Actually you don't surprisngly. It's nice to have someone focused on their work like I am. I may not have shown it the past couple of weeks, but I've got the best grades in my department."

The next hour was spent talking as you both got to know each other, and you noticed Chani opening up to you as the next few classes went by as you practiced your dance sequence and song.

"I think it's good, but the characters are in love and I don't see it being shown." Mr. Alvis said after Chani and you showed your dance and music scene.

"I agree, the characters are in love and both sets of characters have a sort of sexual attraction during each number. For your song, I want your lips barely brushing while you sing back and forth with each other. PLay around with it. PLus I'd like to see you lay her down during the chorus as your hands play down her arms."

Chani looked at you, his eyes asking for permission to do what the teacher asked and you hesitated for a second before nodding your reply.

"Oh and Y/n, for your singing part can we get the crawl towards Chani then I'd like to see how it looks with your chest to chest before the chorus." Mrs. Elven said as she turned the music back on.

"I don't know what you've you done to me" you sang as your sank onto your knees the on all fours.

Chani fell to his knees a small smirking playing on his lips as he watched, a slight hunger burning in him as he saw you in a barely there swimsuit starting to crawl towards him.

"A grown-up women should never fall so easily."

You reached him and you let your hands slide up his torso to his neck where you looped them around your chest pressed against his as he wrapped one arm around your waist as the other tangled into your hair.

"I feel a kind of fear, when I don't have you near."

He pulled your closer as your hands slide down to his chest and hsi head moved in closer your lips barely brushing as you sand the rest of the bridge.

His head moved away as he looked at you longingly before slowly pushing you down till your back gently touched the floor and he crawled on top of you straddling your legs and he sang out the chorus. Your arms moved above your head as he pushed them up his lips close to yours before getting off of you as he completed the song.

You laid there stunned as the teachers clapped as you replayed what had just happened between you and Chani and the burning fire you had in your gut for him.

"That was perfect!" Mr. Avis said. "Please just repeat that for when you preform it."

Mr. Elven smirked as she watched Chani help you up off the floor. "Keep practicing the dance. Incorporate what you did just now into it."

A week blew by and you were back in the dance studio covered in sweat as you rewatched the final dance scene in Dirty Dancing on your phone while you had 'I've Had the Time of My Life' play on loop in the background. "Ugh!" You shouted and fell back onto the floor. You were never going to get this down, and without this being completed you weren't sure you both would even start the acting portion of Jane Austen's Persuasion.

"Taking a break?"

You opened your eyes and looked behind you as you laid on the ground to find Chani once again leaning against the doorframe. A playful smile on his lips as he gazed down at you. He gently licked his lips and you quickly turned away as you felt your face burn under his gaze but the mirror on the wall betrayed you showing your face flush a dark pink.

Smirking he walked over and stood over you looking down. "So, Baby," he said teasingly using the name from the main character of the film as he offered you a hand, "Shall we dance?"

You took his hand in yours and he pulled you up as your body slid up against his. Chani's other hand slid to your waist as you danced to the music. The music looped over again and you continued, forgetting the steps and what you were there to do as your gazes were locked onto each other. Each spin and and hip grind sent you over the edge, making you feel like you were floating on cloud nine.

Sweat poured off your bodies as your clothes clung to you as he twirled you into his body, his leg between yours as your body grinded in his, your thigh being lifted up by one of his hands as your skirt shifted down showing your bare thigh, your lips dangerously close. He opened his eyes and looked into yours, his eyes darkening at the sight of you. Drenched looking, your heaving chest, your lips slightly parted as you looked at him with innocence. He pulled you closer to him, your breath hitting his cheek and he dipped you slightly, pulling you up slowly before dipping you again, swinging your body to the other side of his before pulling you up sharply, noses touching.

He almost kissed you right there but the music stopped and the room fell silent besides the sound of your chests rising and falling as you tried to catch your breath.

"Um," his breath shaky, "I think we're good on the dance portion."

You took a deep breath in, "Yeah I think we definietly are."

It was the day of your performance. The auditorium was filled and your musical and dance number went by without a hitch.

You stood in the side wing as they announced the next group to go on. All that was left of your final assignment was to get over the monologue part, the ending letter in Jane Austen's Persuasion, and you were nervous about it. Spending so much time with Chani and getting to know him for the past months has been nerve-wracking. He was handsome for starters. He could make any girl blush under his gaze, and he certainly knew how to make you turn a dark shade of red.

Your relationship started off as one of annoyance then turned into something else once you got to know each other. Every time you saw Chani, it was like your body was on fire and only he could extinguish the flames he created.

Every time you met up with him to practice, the feelings you had kept growing, and now everything he does sends you over the edge. You didn't know how you got through the musical and dance number without being completely red. You weren't an actor, and the feelings that needed to be portrayed by the characters in those scenes you didn't have to act for - they were your own feelings. Every touch, every smile, every almost lip touch was all you. Even though you were friends, you knew more than likely nothing would grow past that, so if you had to be selfish and take those chances during practice and your performance, then so be it.

You weren't popular like Chani. He made friends wherever he went and had a line of girls to choose from when he wanted to. While you kept your nose in a book or writing one, blocking the world out besides the one that was in print. The only experience you had with relationships and love was just in books. Imagining how it felt to be kissed or your hand held. How it would feel to be kissed in the pouring rain as the main male lead said a love filled confession.

But Chani had been giving you that recently. The looks, the touches, the little flirts. You thought he felt the same as you, just too shy to admit it or ask you out. But every day, those small touches to your back, the slight hand holds, the hair tucking behind the ear made you feel his affection and possible love. But there was one thing you couldn't get your brain wrapped around. Heartbreak.

You could feel longing, happiness, love, a high that you didn't want to come down from when you were with him, but for the past couple of months, he didn't leave your side. You weren't alone. And to portray that emotion of loneliness and breaking apart was difficult.

Chani had given you every tip and trick to getting your body and acting skills to understand it. You couldn't cry on command, and you couldn't use fake tears. It's not like you couldn't cry at the scene. From reading to watching it in countless movies, every time the scene came up, you couldn't stop the overflow of tears, and when Chani performed the whole thing, you were left a crying mess.

The scene started off just reading the letter, and you were supposed to break down as you read it. But you just couldn't cry. You had been trying for weeks, but you were on cloud nine because of Chani. Nothing had brought you down. And now that the time had come, you were nervous to perform it.

You looked across the stage to find Chani standing in the other wing. He saw you and gave you an encouraging smile. You put down your script, which you had for a last-minute refresher, and straighten your dress out. It was a beautiful ocean blue historical dress with gold accents, and you had some white gloves on to match. In the pocket of the dress, you made sure you had the fake letter in which you were supposed to read from.

Looking back up, you saw Chani chatting with one of the other actresses, her back to you. One hand wrapped around her waist and the other on her back. At first, it looked like a hug, but looking closer, you could see it was a romantic touch.

Chani tucked a hair behind the girls ear, something he did so tenderly to you not so long ago, and the smile on his face was of pure affection and fascination as his eyes took in the girl's face.

Your breath caught in your throat as he dipped his head down towards her, his hands holding her face tenderly. Your eyes closed, and you turned away, not wanting to see more. It felt like you couldn't breathe.

You gripped your chest, your other hand finding its way to your mouth so a cry didn't escape from your lips. Over head, you could hear your names being called out and the roar of the crowd clapping, waiting for your entrance.

You quickly wiped your tears, taking a shaky breath in as you pulled out the letter from your pocket and walked on stage, not bothering to look in Chani's direction.

The lights had dimmed till there was just a mellow blue spot light on you. You looked at the envelope in your hands, your breath still shaky, which suddenly hitched in your throat when you saw your name printed on the front with Chani's handwriting. You had thought it was supposed to be the actual letter from the novel inside, but now you weren't so sure, and it scared you a little.

Your hands shook as you undid the envelope and opened up the letter. Your name was written neatly on the top and you tried to read it as the violin started to play, signaling the start of your speech, your eyes having a hard time focusing on the paper.

You looked out in the crowd, your voice somehow strong but quiet as you spoke a loud. "I can listen no longer in silence. I must speak to you by such means as are within my reach."

You paused for a second as a lump in your throat grew when your eyes caught the first sentence of the handwritten note in front of you. 'I'm surprisingly not good with words, but if there is one word I would use to describe you, it would be perfection.'

"You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope." Your voice started to shake, as you continued reading what was written to you.

'You have struck my every being. Every inch of you is perfection. Every touch. Every glance. Perfection.'

Your voice cracked, tears finally spilling down your cheeks. "Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago."

'Oh, god, Y/N. I love you. I think I always have since our first encounter. How you looked so nervous and adorable. My thoughts had started to be consumed of you, ever growing the more I saw you. When you brought me down to earth that day in the dance studio, I knew. I knew it was you.'

Chani's footsteps echoing on the stage brought you back, your head turning to see Chani on the other side of the stage, waiting for you so you could speak the next passage together. "Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death." He turned to face you, small tears forming in his eyes. "I have loved none but you. Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant. You alone have brought me to Bath. For you alone, I think and plan."

How could he love you and still kiss another girl? Was this a game to him? His sweet words filled you with hope, but you'd rather have none if the aching feeling in your chest was always constant with him. But how could he love you? True, he spent the past few months with you constantly, but how could one night, tonight of all nights, turn his love into nothing. If you consume his thoughts, then how could another women stray him so easily?

You looked out at the crowd before you, each person intently listening as Chani spoke the next part. "Have you not seen this? Can you fail to have understood my wishes?" He walked towards you, his hand motioning to the letter in your hands. You looked down again, a few tears falling onto the paper in front of you. "I had not waited even these ten days, could I have read your feelings, as I think you must have penetrated mine. I can hardly write. I am every instant hearing something which overpowers me."

'Y/N. My dear, sweet Y/N, I can't picture my life without you in it. It's only been a few months, but all I can think of is you. You're the sun, the sky, the darkest and most stormy of days, you're the ray of light breaking through the crowds. You're my dreams, my hopes, and my ambitions. You're my everything. I couldn't face tomorrow if you weren't in it.' You looked up to find him standing in front of you, a tearful smile on his face, his hands finding yours and cupping them in his as he raised the letter closer to you to finish reading. 'Every smile, every almost kiss, every touch. I can't imagine not being able to do all those to anyone else but you. Please, my darling Y/N, be mine and mine alone. I'll cherish and protect every minute we have together and shower you with love. Lovingly yours, Chani'

You looked up to find him finishing the monologue, his face dangerously close to yours, his eyes searching for an answer in your eyes. You stared back for a second before the thought of his letter being a lie struck you again, your heart cracking under his beautiful gaze.

Turning away and towards the wings of the stage, you saw the same girl from earlier dressed up in battle gear with a woman in a dress. Her arm around her waist, and then she carefully cupped her cheeks, giving the girl a passionate kiss.

"It was a fake kiss. Yours is the only lips I want to touch mine with." Chani whispered, his voice barely audible over the loud violin, his one hand which was still holding yours squeezed yours. You turned slowly towards him, the violin cut off, leaving the room in silence. Tears formed in your eyes as his whispered, "I love you, my dearest."

He pulled you close, one hand holding the small of your back and the other gently cupping your cheek. His lips touched yours, sending waves of pleasure and love through your body. You stood in shock for a second before your hands found their way to his chest, his heart beating hard beneath your hands.

The crowd around you exploded with applause, tearing you both away to look at the crowd, a laugh escaping from your lips as you looked back to Chani, who had the biggest smile on his face. He gently pulled you in again for a small kiss, his forehead resting on yours as he looked longingly into your eyes.

The curtain closed, and you stood still standing in each other's embrace, not wanting to let go of one another.

"Be mine?" Chani whispered, his lips brushing your cheek.

"I'm all yours."

I literally finished this on the train cause I couldn't get this story out of my head :3 Hope you enjoy! -Liz

#sf9 #chani #sf9 chani #chani fanfiction #sf9 chani fanfiction #sf9 fanfiction #sf9 imagines #jane austen #mamma mia #dirty dancing

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frickingnerd · 8 months

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i know who you pretend i am

pairing: A(lvis) x gn!reader

summary: A notices how you look at them...

A noticed the way you looked at them. it was like you were talking to them, but looking at someone else. someone who's been long gone.

A wasn't stupid, the connection between the two of you was clear to them. despite never saying who A truly was, you looked at them the same way you had looked at him. as if you knew that the two of them were the same.

and yet, you never said a word about it. you never asked A about him. the one you had been in love with in another universe and the one who had left you after the creation of a new one.

A was at a loss with you. they had everyone figured out but you. perhaps it were their own emotions that made it hard to understand yours. A still felt the same way about you, but maybe it were your feelings that had changed. maybe in the time you two were apart, you had tried to move on and the way you looked at them was just the lingering remnants of the love you had once felt.

you had loved him, but perhaps you were trying to see the two of them as different people. perhaps you were seeing A as the one they were and not the one they reminded you of…

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ashandquiet · 2 years

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My Most Unswerving Devotion

Chapter 2. Musings of a Duke

Regency! Soma Jarlskona x F!Reader

Summary: Since coming to Norfolk to stay with your family, the conversations have all revolved around matrimony. Just when your aunt has found a match for you much to your chagrin, quite by accident you fall for the wealthy Duke of Cambridgeshire; Soma Guthrumsdóttir. Can circumstance truly keep you apart?

A/N: This chapter is from the perspective of Soma, I hope you enjoy the bits of story building and I apologize for the long wait on chapter 2.

Read it on AO3

Soma had always been level-headed and sane.

Or at least she was sure she had been, a few bouts of rage, but that was due to anyone under duress, it wasn’t until this afternoon she found herself acting a fool.

Soma always followed a schedule, a strictly tailored schedule at that. She would rise just before dawn, dress, and take her breakfast in her study. It was there that her housekeeper and butler would relay the affairs of the servants of the manor, the places in need of address, and she would delegate resources as necessary. Then after having read the household ledger, Soma would take a short walk in the manor gardens to take in the fresh morning air. By the time she arrived back inside, Birna would finally be awake and sitting down for breakfast in the breakfast dining room, so Soma would sit with her and tea while Birna regaled her with the affairs of the servants, but with more sordid details as always. After breakfast, Birna would ride out to town to cover any affairs of Soma’s that did not require the Duke’s immediate attention and Soma would go check on land tenants.

After the morning's chores had been carried out, it was then that at her leisure Soma would take her gelding Alvis out to run the lengths of the land. It was here in the fields that she truly felt the strains and pressure of her inherited title lift from her shoulders. All the judgment and strain put on her by society could wash away, but in the end, it was just a wash. She did just as Guthrum had taught her, put on airs, and be intelligent and cunning. Never let them see how they affect you.

He had taken her in when she was just an unkempt street child scurrying about Stockholm with a small gaggle of other orphans, stealing and scraping to stay alive. It was after the death of her poor mother and father had left her alone and abandoned, and she had been running about the port struggling to keep up with the much older children who ran the gang like wolves. The tall bearded man dressed in finery had stepped in her way causing her to fall and his outstretched hand had effectively changed the course of her life forever.

Before leaving Sweden he had put her to work, mostly as a little spy because she could fit into places, and hear and see things that the others of his entourage couldn’t. Guthrum then grew fond of Soma quickly and wasted no time inviting her back to England with him, and Soma saw no need to protest, she was fed, warmly clothed, and most of all happy.

Soma was given the best possible education available, learning to read and write quickly, and excelling at arithmetic and humanitarian studies. She learned to be a great leader, as well as a listener under Guthrum’s influence and tutelage. It was there she was introduced to the younger Ragnarsson brothers Ivarr and Ubba, and she learned how to fight, shoot, hunt, and the art of swordplay, seeing the two brothers as adopted older brothers of her own. As she grew and became accustomed to her life in England it became plain to Soma that Guthrum never once attempted to raise Soma as a lady, knowing that he would never have a male heir; Soma was raised as a son, and eventual heir to Guthrum’s, land, title, and holdings.

Much to society's chagrin, Soma was never offered as a marriage prospect, even though she was named as Guthrum’s only heir and beneficiary. While in her teen years there were rumors that she would eventually marry Ubba Ragnarsson, while others argued that she was particularly monstrous and no man would be able to tame her feral nature. Many made little attempt to woo her, but she snubbed them in favor of horses, books, and swordplay.

The study of law had entranced her, so at the behest of Guthrum, a law education was arranged. Under the guise of a man, she attended university and rose to be a scholar in her own right. It was there at university with its dances, shops, and libraries, that she befriended Birna, her most stout-hearted and amorous companion, a daughter of merchants who similarly to Guthrum’s circle had come to England from Scandinavia and gained such prosperous wealth that they stayed to provide a life for their daughter.

Birna threw Soma into a life she had never before experienced outside the scholarly and dutiful confines of her being. The joys of drink, dancing, and social calls, as well as indulging in the finer luxuries that she had denied herself. She purchased her first townhouse and it was there that Soma and Birna threw small soirees, and Birna mocked Soma for her obsession and love of rugs and interior finery.

She met and entertained women, and had a few brief affairs, most ending with the other party marrying or being sent away by family. However letters were always exchanged but as letters stopped arriving Soma would burn the lavender and locks of hair and resume her solitary lifestyle, caring for her friends and the makeshift family she had found in the city.

As her life beyond Cambridgeshire stretched in an expanse before her, opportunities of employment and adventure beckoning, in the country, Guthrum grew sick. Knowing he was not long for this world the Duke summoned his adopted child back to his side. Dutifully Soma came and remained with him until the day he died. She knew her days of freedom were over, obligation was her constant companion as she assumed the responsibilities of Dukedom. At the recommendation of Birna, she hired an old acquaintance of theirs, Lif as a secretary and brought Birna on as an equerry to the estate.

Together the three of them formed an insurmountable team in making the land of Cambridgeshire prosperous and one of great renown throughout England.

However, the rumor mill never stopped churning, but what was there for petty country folk to talk about more than the affairs of Soma Guthrumsdóttir?

On these particular days after a morning full of settling disputes and arranging for gifts and aid to be sent to families within her territory, Soma found herself in most need of a ride. While her head swam with thoughts of land rights, tenant arrangements, and the lending of estates, Soma rode well off into the fields of Norfolk just for a moment's reprise from it all.

It was there, near a blooming horse-chestnut tree that she had nearly collided with what she could only describe as an angel came to earth, the sound of her voice still shook Soma to her bones as she urged Alvis homeward.

She had removed her gloves to feel the bones and muscles in the woman’s wrist and at the light skin contact, she felt as though she were on fire. The way that she could feel the woman’s eyes burn as she watched her, the soft gasp she made when Soma had twisted her wrist in a painful direction, it all made Soma’s skin prickle at the thought of her. Soma couldn’t help herself; she had crooned and given her a pet name of all things. One meeting and all she could think about was how it would feel to touch skin to skin. To talk to her as if they had always known each other.

Soma let out a frustrated noise as she neared the manor, she knew Birna would never let her hear the end of it if she came in looking like a lovestruck, amorous fool. The romantic sensibilities of her joyful friend would run away with her. How would she ever tell Birna she never even got the woman’s name? She was a damned fool, and all she could do was hope that Birna was off making some poor girl, or boy flush with compliments.

But Soma wasn’t lucky, and Birna was there sitting outside the stable on a bench pretending to read a book while watching the stable boy work with the horse.

“There you are Soma, you great wandering lordy you,” Birna called in her usual chipper tone as Soma rode up to the stable and dismounted. Soma flashed her a weary look and led Alvis into the stable, politely declining the offer from the stableboy to take the horse from her.

Birna got serious, “What happened.”

Soma shook her head with a sigh, finding herself rushing to get the cinches undone from Alvis, Birna would begin her further questioning soon and Soma could not bring herself to say what a fool she had been.

“Was there an incident at one of the farms? Did a cow give birth and it was partially gruesome to have seen with your lordly eyes? Was someone's child struck by a goat and you were given the child to hold while the goat was put to death? Are we having mutton?”

“No, no incidents of mention,” Soma grunted, struggling with one particular loop, her friend’s well-intentioned questions making her more irritable by the minute.

“Let me help, you’re gumming it up,” Birna stepped between Soma and Alvis taking over the chore of tacking down Soma’s bay horse. She treaded slightly out of Birna’s way to watch her undo the cinch, yet she found herself gazing at her hands, again.

“You look as though you’ve seen a ghost, Soma.”

“I’m alright I just need some time to myself, thank you Birna,” Soma felt grave as she nodded to her friend to take her to leave.

Stepping out from under the stable cover Soma ran her hands over her face, she was suffocating. Her throat was tight and she felt as though she would begin perspiring through her waistcoat, her hands clammy within the confines of the gloves, Soma stripped them off and tossed them to the ground.

Somehow she had let herself act such a fool that she had forgotten to ask for the lady’s name, or an address, calling card, anything. She had even neglected to tell the lady her name, of course, Soma had wrapped her wrist with a handkerchief from her pocket that was embroidered with “SG”, her initials, but how on earth would it even find its way back to her? The most mortifying and frustrating realization of all hit like a boulder being thrown into water; How would she ever know if the beautiful creature she had met this day, also preferred the company of women .

Feeling helpless, which she hated the most, she started walking towards the manor to lock herself in the safety of her private rooms, where she could brood and mourn this terrible turn in private. It wasn’t the first time she had experienced such heartbreak and she felt as though it wouldn’t be the last. She knew herself and her heart, yet she always seemed to fall into the trap of self-imposed distress regarding affairs of the heart.

Taking care of the tie in her cravat she tossed it to the ground and made her way into the manor, taking long quick strides to her study not caring for the muddy footprints that she left in her wake.

She has always desired women, both emotionally and carnally. The gentlest touch of another woman filled her with heavenly joy, in the passion-filled faucet of her heart she held the most sublime desires imaginable. It was her every aim in life to give a woman, whom she loved so deeply it cut like a knife, every possible thing and more. Soma had fallen like this before, and she knew that if she did not stop her heart from getting away with her she could end up broken, her heart exposed to the empty expanse of the world in the end just as before.

Soma let out an enraged noise throwing her hands in the air, she could feel the boiling rage rising within her at the thought of losing composure yet again. She was being choked, by manners and the very opposing forces within herself. Almost flailing to pull herself from it, she tore off her waistcoat throwing it across the empty room, not even having made it to her study yet. She panted staring at the offending garment. It wasn’t enough she still felt as though her clothes were constricting themselves around her. Soma then fumbled with the buttons on her vest and flung it in another direction, then the cufflinks, she yanked off her boots and collapsed onto her rear. Her eyes began to burn with emotion and she could feel her throat tighten. Soma undid the first few buttons of her collar and then drooped backward onto her back to stare upwards. Soma covered her face with her hands and suffered a strained sigh.

There was a shuffle of feet that came to an abrupt stop in the doorway, Soma turned her head to glance at the doorway where Birna stood looking a bit befuddled. Soma’s friend held the discarded cravat and suede gloves.

“Well aren’t you pitiful,” Birna chided as a maid rushed to take the items from her.

Soma sighed feeling quite pitiful indeed.

#soma x reader #soma jarlskona x reader #soma jarlskona #birna ac valhalla #ac valhalla #regency au #soma ac valhalla #lif ac valhalla #guthrum ac valhalla #soma my love #regency inspired #austen inspired #the world needs more wlw regency fiction

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xenoblademisadventures · 9 months

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I'm bored. Gonna give two hot takes for every Xenoblade game. One uncommon criticism and one uncommon praise.

Xenoblade 1

Criticism

Shulk's character arc was bad. Like, what was he on about? Firstly, the revenge quest. It doesn't really tackle the ideas of revenge. Instead he just goes "oh shit my gf isn't dead time to be a pacifist." And with Egil, we've got Shulk going "we must spare him" while quite literally every other character, plot point, etc. is saying some variation of "we tried" or "no." And then he has no issue with slaying Zanza and his henchmen. He also has this thing about learning to see more than just what's in front of him, but that's really only something he tells Alvis once in Ose Tower. It's not something you can clearly see develope over the course of the game.

Praise

I really liked the camera in Xenoblade 1. You can see the cameraman going nuts whenever Alvis is on screen, especially when he gives Shulk that pep talk in Space. You can also see it with the fight against the mechon on Bionis Leg. The camera was just on point almost every scene. I think the credit goes to the storyboard artists, I'm not entirely sure. But they did an incredible job.

Xenoblade X

Criticism

The combat system was really bad. Like, I felt like there were two grounds for the combat. Either you have no clue what's happening or you snap the game in half. This is a multifaceted issue that comes down to a mix between the combat itself, unhelpful tutorials, and the UI failing to emphasize relevant information. But, what I mean here is that even if the game explained its combat system to the player proper, it's got too many type attributes, which usually just results in you switching out gear to match the resistances and weaknesses between fight, it also means I have to look up something's attributes on the wiki before I can properly plan out my build, which isn't an issue in the other games; the buffs attached to the dual guns are too powerful compared to everything else, so it just makes them overpowered, but they're also fun status effects, so it just makes every other gun feel bad to play; Overdrive is needlessly complicated and you can pretty much only either break the game or find the mechanic to be useless depending on whether you've looked up external guides; TP being regained through auto attacks would be a good system if the amount of TP gain wasn't fucking pitiful; also the TP arts are way too powerful like True Stream Edge and Ghost Factory are pretty much all you need to 1v1 most of the shit in the game; there's not much need for utilizing party members, post-game the avatar character can 1v1 everything, and even ignoring that, there aren't any real systems in place to make the presence of your allies feel known; and there's a bunch of other shit. It's definitely the worst combat system in the series by far.

Praise

I really like how X progresses its penalties for death. You start off with full party wipes only sending you back a few minutes. A lot of your deaths in this game will be caused by an overlevelled enemy spotting you, and the level design does an incredible job at accommodating this and turning that into a core part of the gameplay loop. So, about halfway through the game, you get access to these giant mechs. The mechs let you move faster and they're really fucking strong in combat. Like, if you haven't played X, imagine if you could use Ouroboros Form indefinitely. The catch is that if your mech dies, it doesn't respawn. You have to go get it repaired. A little inconvenient, but nothing unmanageable. If your mech gets destroyed too many times, your character's insurance stops paying for the repairs. The mechs are really fucking expensive. So, you probably can't afford the repairs, especially if you haven't been stockpiling an ungodly amount of money before chapter 6. Furthermore, threat assessment gets a lot more fucky once you get mechs because larger enemies have better stats than smaller enemies, so you get cases where level 40 enemies are weaker than level 30 enemies. So, you can't just see number big run away. But the game eases you into this. For one, you only get one mech immediately, which will probably go on the player character. So, you can learn to dismount whenever your mech might die. Then you start getting the ability to have the AI control the mechs. There's a command to tell specific party members to mount or dismount their mechs. So, the AI won't screw you if you're quick enough. Then you get access to the ability to make the mechs fly. There's two new major factors here. Firstly, that's a whole new axis to get spotted from. You might get sniped by an enemy way above or way below you. Second, you can't really dismount when you're in the fucking stratosphere, so you don't have that safety net. The game teaches the player how to keep an eye out for big enemies, so it doesn't feel unfair by the time you get to the point where a level 80 mech plucks your level 40 ass out of the sky. And I really like how the increased stakes are a natural progression to your power-ups. It's a really good system and it adds a great spice to the exploration.

Xenoblade 2

Criticism

So, this us something that I haven't complained about before, but it's a massive bugbear for me. I really hate that 2 and 3 removed the player's ability to tell what detection type the enemies are. Like, sneaking around dangerous enemies to explore areas early is some of the most fun I've had with these games. Like, the out of combat interactions with enemies in X may as well be the glue holding the gameplay together. One of my most memorable moments in Xenoblade 3 was stealing Riki's Biter from the level 90 area at level 30. And this is an even more annoying decision for 2 and 3 specifically because those games reuse a lot of enemies from 1, which does show enemy aggro types. So I just happened to have that information memorized, which let me avoid the enemies anyways. But there's no reason someone who hasn't played 1 or X would know that different enemies have different aggro types. I think the removal of this information also limits options for level design. Like, the Territorial Deathape was a lot more memorable in 1 compared to every other game. And the reason for that is because the deathape is kind of off to the side in the other games, but it will sneak up and ambush you in 1. Like, in X, the monkey was off to the side, but it has a billion other enemies that function same as Rotbart. It's just that the deathape happened to not be one of those enemies. While in 2 and 3, I think the more underwhelming deathapes can be largely attributed to them having much more predictable movement patterns. And part of the reason for that is that you can tell at a glance exactly how to avoid Rotbart in 1, but you don't get that option in 2 and 3. I think 2 and 3 both have been leaning more towards not making overpowered enemies randomly aggro onto the player. And I think they're worse off for it.

Praise

This is the first Xenoblade game where Monolith did a good job with the UI. For those who weren't around for 1 and X, the UIs were impressively bad and it wasn't really a question. 1 covered way too much space with useless information while X just completely failed to emphasize important details. Meanwhile, 2 did a great job at making information compact and emphasizing what the player needed to know.

Xenoblade 3

Criticism

N was a poorly written villain. His backstory was great, but everything else about him sucked. This applies to every other tragic villain in the game. They're expected to garner sympathy off the premise of "they're important to the protagonists," but they're presented the same way as any no bars evil villain, which is just a huge disconnect. Like, I can't really get behind N as an antagonist because I can't see a world where Noah does an evil laugh. Like, I can be sold that he'd join Moebius, but I can't buy him acting the way N's presented. As with Joran, I think he became a lot less interesting as a plot point once he's revealed to be an antagonist, which hurt Lanz's character arc a lot. Crys is potentially interesting, but omg please stop monologuing what the fuck. But yeah, that's why I think N is a pretty shit antagonist. He just doesn't sell the "was Noah" part.

Praise

This is going to sound strange, but the way the game handles swimming is so much better in my opinion. First of all, the sound effects are better. In every other game, my autistic ass would get really bothered by the swimming sound effects, but not here. Second, the fact that swimming doesn't cancel combat is great. It was really annoying falling or being knocking into water and having the character decide "no more fighting." It was most noticeable in X because you could jump and sprint during combat and thus had a better chance of falling into water (and falling into water cancelled Overdrive), but I also felt it in 1 and 2. Also, I appreciate that the game's tutorial makes you fight and swim, just to say "hey you can do that now btw" to returning players. I also really like the wave effects Erythia Sea. Those were really cool.

#xenoblade #xenoblade analysis

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oddlittlestories · 3 months

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Picking this up from @lovelenivy

Seasons:

1. Seasons 4-6

i'm sorry, i'm so indecisive. these are my favorites, for wildly differing reasons. there's stronger plot arcs than 1-3, less overall animosity, the characters get to grow and change, and we're not on the downward spiral trajectory of later seasons.

s4 is so funny and also poignant. i love every single one of the cases and most of the patients.

Best episode: uhhhhhh why do you hate me. Frozen / Wilson's Heart

Favorite episode: Mirror, Mirror

Honorable mentions: all of them

Least favorite episode: either don't ever change or living the dream

s5 has some of my all-time favorite episodes too, plus some of my absolute-favorite Cuddy and Cameron moments, plus some truly great Thirteen times too

Best episode: Locked In, Lucky Thirteen

Favorite episode: Birthmarks

Honorable mention(s): Both Sides Now, Last Resort, Here Kitty Kitty, the Itch, Joy, Emancipation, Joy to the World

Least favorite episode: adverse events (kinda boring), saviors

s6 is just Hilson bliss. Plus I LOVE the Chase episodes ngl

Best episode: Broken

Favorite episode: Lockdown

Honorable mention(s): The Tyrant, Known Unknowns, Teamwork, Ignorance is Bliss, Wilson, the Down Low, Remorse, 5 to 9, Private Lives, Knight Fall

Least favorite episode: Epic Fail

2. Seasons 1-3

Classic House. Early days. Lighter on the plot arcs, darker on the interpersonal relationships. Less reflection in the episodes but also the characters just do absolutely off-the-wall stuff. 10/10.

Season 1

Best: Three Stories

Favorite: Three stories, under my skin

Honorable mention(s): Histories, Cursed, Control, Mob Rules

Least favorite: honestly idk

Season 2

Best: Euphoria, No Reason

Favorite: The Mistake

HMs: uhhh most of them

Least Favorite: Skin Deep maybe?

Season 3

Best: One Day, One Room & Informed Consent

Favorite: Son of a Coma Guy

HMs: Meaning, Cane and Abel, Que Sera Sera, The Tritter Arc, Needle in a Haystack, Insensitive, Airborne, Act Your Age, House Training, Family, Resignation, The Jerk, Human Error

Least favorite: also the Tritter arc bc I get anxiety every time lmao

3. Seasons 7-8

The Huddy stuff makes me sad, and I don't love the prison stuff either. (I don't even dislike Huddy but honestly the best Huddy moments? So not in these seasons.) I loved the c-word but overall these seasons shaved years off my life lmao

Best: the c-word

Favorite: Kyle

HM(s): the finale

Least favorite: not sure

Characters:

from favorite to least favorite of the main characters –

I love them all too much.

1. House, Wilson, Thirteen

2. Chase, Cameron, Cuddy, Kutner, Park

4. Masters, Lucas, Foreman, Amber, Alvie, Taub, Cole

6. Adams. I don't really care about her one way or another.

favorite ship: hilson (house / wilson)

underrated ship: thirteen / cameron, or chase / foreman

honorable mentions: lucas x cuddy, cuddy x stacy, cuddy x cameron

Tags:

anybody that wants to participate! i know it's kind of long so no sweat if you don't want to do it. i'm also indecisive so i had trouble picking episodes lmao

Also @greghatecrimes @queersolar @thefandomlesbian

#tag game #favorites #seasons rundown

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vanillahina · 11 months

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I'm figuring out Tumblr...I think! Hello there, friends!

My name is Vanilla, I'm a French Canadian (tokébec icitte!) gal who's working hard to become a constant VTuber content creator. Drawing, writing, streaming, you name it.

I especially love creating content for the Xenoblade Chronicles Trilogy. That, and also Pokemon (including my OCs, though you won't see them here very often). I'm also a huge fan of Spy X Family, though I don't create content for it (...yet?).

Tags, favorite ships and others below:

Posts-related tags: vanilla streams / vanilla writes / vanilla reblogs / vanilla art / Poké Art / Xeno Art

Favorite characters: (xbc1) Shulk, Alvis, Fiora, Riki | (xbc2) Malos, Pyra, Mythra, Nia. | (xbc3) A, Taion, Sena, Na'el, Matthew | (Pokemon) Adaman, Irida, Kieran, Raihan, Sapphire

#about me #hi #pinned post

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quinloki · 1 year

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Quicksand - ALTERNATIVE

If you haven't read Quicksand up to chapter 5 you're going to be terribly confused.

Fem Reader x Sir Crocodile

CW: Language, violence, blood, moral ambiguity, murder, sexual themes and situations, yandere, angst with a happy ending, a referenced instance of physical abuse. 18+ only

ADDITIONAL CW: Dub-con, kidnapping, imprisonment

The alternative version picks up at Chapter 6- there's a lot of overlap for the first few chapters as the story slowly peels away from the original. The alternative chapters explore Sir Crocodile's yandere tendencies in a setting where the reader rejects him (vs the original where she never ran).

You can read it as it posts to Tumblr, or sate your curiosity on AO3 // Wattpad immediately.

Chapter 7: Shifting

Going to work was utterly nerve-wracking, to the point that you nearly considered calling off. Spending the day job hunting seemed like a better use of your time than spending the day nearly ready to vomit because you weren’t sure when the CEO would decide on a surprise visit.

You checked your phone one last time to see that there weren’t any missed calls or messages. You hadn’t heard from him since you left, and it was one-half a relief, and one-half a concern. Sunday, you had been in a fit of sleeplessness and nerves, randomly napping when your tension had simply forced you to rest. Last night at least you got a few hours in a row, and hopefully it would be enough to get you through the day.

Getting into the office, you checked in with Buggy. He gave you an odd look, but wasn’t prompted to say anything. You’d come into work on Monday’s a little strained before, but it had been quite a few months since anything had happened to cause it. You wanted to ask him if Crocodile had said anything, but if something was already being done against you from an employment standpoint you were sure Buggy would’ve cut to the chase and let you know.

Asking about Crocodile yourself would’ve been completely out of character for you. Your job was almost entirely internal within the West branch, you had no direct concerns or contact with the CEO. You barely had direct contact with anyone higher up the ladder than Buggy.

"So, how'd it go?" Alvida questions as soon as you were out of Buggy's office. Her voice had the usual almost melodic tone it got when she knew she was on the verge of juicy gossip.

"Horrid," you assert, and something on your face must have backed you up because Alvida’s entire demeanor slumped.

“Oh, honey. I’m sorry.” She gives you a hug, patting your back a little. “I expected if it went poorly you would’ve come in with too much makeup or a really bad new haircut.”

You snort and lean into her hug a little. Alvida was a good friend, and even as the main hub of gossip in the office, she’d never betray your actual trust.

“It was good for a moment, but,” you heave a big sigh before moving to sit at your desk and begin to work. “Well, I got cold feet I guess.”

“At least it wasn’t Buggy.” Alvida offers, starting a pot of coffee for the three of you.

“Haa, I almost wish it was.” You admit with a chuckled sigh.

“… Oh dear.” Alvida replies after a moment’s shock. “Can I… I mean, you need to talk about it?”

You shake your head. “I don’t want to just yet, and I don’t even know that I should.”

“Alright. Well, if you just need someone to confide in or vent to, you can trust me, (Y/N).” Alvida says, setting a cup of coffee next to you before sitting at her nearby desk.

“I know Alvy, thank you.”

You start sorting through your work, making idle talk with Alivda.

“Do you know what Buggy did over the weekend?” You ask with a little less energy than you meant.

"He's been working on starting his own business. I guess he's been consulting with some of his old friends." Alvida said absently.

"Oh wow." You stop working and look over at her. "Seriously?"

Alvida shrugs. "As seriously as I think he does anything. I have no idea what kind of business it is."

“Huh… I wonder if he needs any help organizing it.”

Alvida nearly drops the papers she’s working on. “You? Change jobs?” She looks completely flabbergasted. “I… mean this as politely as possible, but I honestly thought you’d retire from here. No risks, no changes, no leaps of faith. You fit in well here and enjoy it, I’m surprised.”

“Mm, maybe I could use a challenge.” You say with a small smile as you return to your organizing. “Besides, it’s not that much of a change, I already know how to handle and work with Buggy.”

“Fair.”

The two of you worked in silence for a while longer before you came across a piece of information that nearly made you groan. "The auction next week is being hosted by Donquixote Doflamingo?"

Just what you needed. Another Warlord in your life.

"Yeah, the CEO of SMILE, Inc.? Well, new CEO, he stepped up after retiring from modeling last year, didn't he?"

"Beats me," you admit with a shrug, wondering internally how many of the Warlords had legitimate businesses as fronts. "Isn't SMILE a pharmaceutical company? From Model to CEO of something like that seems like a heck of a leap."

"Oh, I'm sure he pulled some strings," Alvida says. "His money has money." You snort at her sarcasm. "Still, they say he was educated in the Holy Lands, so he's probably smarter than he looks."

Alvida flips her phone and holds it out to you. There's a picture of a tall, well-built man on the beach in glaringly pink swim trunks with hair so blonde it's almost lost in the sunlight. His shaggy hair is drenched, and it looks good on him that way. You can feel the arrogance rolling off of him in the photo, it's obvious he's aware he's being photographed.

"I'm surprised he's retired from modeling." You admit. "He's not even thirty yet, I can't imagine."

"He's been doing that work since he was 16, I think? He might just be tired of it." Alvida says, seemingly disinterested. "He'd be cuter if he wasn't so aware of his good looks."

"Can you get me a behavioral write up on him before the Auction?" You ask. "I know we usually have more time with these big profile events, but anything would help."

"Sure, I'll have Galdino and Cabaji help me." She assures you. "Think you're going to have trouble corralling him during the auction?"

"Maybe. Better to over prepare than under prepare." You roll your shoulders and release some of the building tension and check your phone. Still no messages. That’s good, you can focus on the task at hand.

Aside from dealing with Doflamingo for a couple of days, you also have to brace yourself to see Sir Crocodile again. He’ll be present during the auction proper, though, if you can make it work you may be able to hand things off to Alvida that day. He’s technically a visitor from another branch, so you don’t have to work with him at all.

It depends on how you feel in a week’s time. If you think you can face Sir Crocodile neutrally, then you will. Otherwise, there’s no shame in hiding behind your good friend who hasn’t slept with the CEO of your company.

You get things organized and pop into Buggy’s office for a moment before going on your rounds to check in on all the teams.

“Hey boss,” you say evenly, pulling out the pages about the upcoming auction. “Can you see if you can get us some extra hands? Donquixote is a big name even in big names, and I’d like to make sure the staff is beyond capable of tending to any requests he may have while he’s here.”

“As flashily as I can!” Buggy says with a smile. “Feeling better?”

You smile a little and nod. “Yeah, sorry for worrying you this morning, boss.”

“Bah, it’s fine. As long as you’re feeling better.” Buggy waves a hand.

“I hear you’re starting a business, boss.” You say pointedly, causing him to flinch.

“Ah, ha ha, I mean, I’m sure I could use your help… (Y/N).” Buggy answers rather sheepishly, almost hiding behind his desk.

You chuckle a little. “I was thinking it was about time I started looking for a new job, so you can certainly keep me in mind, boss.”

Buggy lights up almost instantly, practically screeching with glee. “(Y/N)! You would be an immense help! You’re so much better at organizing people and things than I am, and you’re really good with words and getting people to do what you need, and I’m not failing or anything so far, but I would be so relieved to have your help.”

“Let’s get through this auction, and we can talk about details.” You say, pointing at the papers you’ve left behind. “I’m going to check on the teams and do my rounds, but I’ll be back for this copy later, so make those calls, boss.”

The rest of the day went on without incident and you headed home only a little later than usual. Being able to work through lunch while still getting to eat lunch made the day go smoothly, and you were grateful for Buggy's consideration. There was less stress after work as well, knowing that you wouldn't have quite the mountain to deal with the next day.

On top of everything else he had managed to get some extra hands to help out during the auction, and even better than that, Buggy himself would be coordinating them. All you had to do was determine how they would be utilized, and then your boss would oversee them. Leaving you to focus on Doflamingo, and eventually, possibly Sir Crocodile.

You really did want to just quit and leave the Metro before the auction, but it would leave Buggy and Alvida in the lurch and you didn’t want to do that to them.

The drive home was dull and long. Traffic was terrible this time of the evening, and honestly you should’ve just stayed at work for a couple of hours and gotten more done before trying to get home. Hindsight and all that. You listen to some music and meander your way home without incident.

After you get inside your apartment you check your phone and see a message.

From Sunawani.

Taking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly, you open it up and read it.

Sunawani: The auction was supposed to happen in the South Branch. I can have it returned to that venue if you prefer, but I wanted to be clear I didn’t know it had been changed until today.

You: It’s okay. Thank you, and I’m sorry.

You pause for a moment and then continue. Admitting your plan won’t hurt anything, and maybe it’ll help him to move on as well.

You: After the auction I’m putting in my notice.

Sunawani: I will be true to my word, Miss (Y/N). You aren’t required to leave.

You: I know. I just need to.

Sunawani: Need?

You: Yes.

You: I don’t want to get into it.

There was a long enough silence you set your phone down and went about your evening routine. You took a shower, changed into comfortable clothes, and started something to eat before you checked your phone again.

Sunawani: Very well.

The two words twist your heart a little and you put the phone down. There’s no other response that would’ve gone well, but the finality in the statement stings more than you expected. The conversations of the last two months start dancing through your head and twist your stomach so hard you’re barely able to eat. You pack the leftovers into the fridge and go to bed early.

Your rest is restless, and your dreams are full of sand and citrus and cigar smoke.

. . . . . .

After Monday you kept feeling like you were being watched. You couldn't find anything definitive, but there was a powerful sense of being stalked that itched at you randomly. You wrote it off as being stressed about the auction at first, but as things progressed for the preparations you were less and less stressed.

Despite the lessening job-related stress, the strange sensation wasn't abating.

Alvida’s write up on Doflamingo prompted you to practice with Dandy to prepare for the man’s arrival. Practicing with Dandy went well. Aside from the fact that you spent a couple hours every day interacting with him in the first place. You were, at least, finding a decent space between fully business and marginally interested.

You'd need to fawn over Doflamingo a little more, but you couldn't bring yourself to do so with Dandy. You knew him too well, and you absolutely weren't going to give him any ammunition to use against you down the road. As coworkers it was best to keep him at slightly more than arm's length, preferably with a taser, if you were being honest.

Organizing the space, equipment, and laying out the plans and event timing went smoothly as well. The extra hands - provided by Sir Crocodile and managed by Buggy - were a huge weight off everyone's shoulders. Especially since they were all not just competent, but quiet as well. No zany quirks, no desire to be the center of attention. They were more like you and less like Buggy or Dandy, so they didn't stress Buggy out and they didn't create additional work.

But they weren't creative. They came to people with questions on everything, almost more akin to computers than people. Not that it was a bad thing, the lack of personal decision making might have been part of their contract for all you knew. They were extra hands, and extra eyes, but that was really it.

Alvida caught you glancing around on Friday when things were finally coming together.

"What's got you so twitchy, (Y/N)?" She asks, "Anything I can help with?"

"Ah, no. Everything's pretty much handled. The Auction's Wednesday, the VIP will be in Tuesday, and I'll sleep again sometime Thursday, I'm sure." You joke, stretching. "I just keep feeling like someone's watching me. It's been itching at me for the last few days, and I can't shake it."

Alvida leans in after looking around to make sure you’re alone.

“Could it be related to your date?”

“Hah?” You almost yell the questioning sound and cover your mouth. “What do you mean?”

“Well, things went south, right?” She prompts. “You said you got cold feet, did you bail, after… you know, sex?”

Your face goes red, and you make a face and it’s really all the answer Alvida needs.

“Oh, honey.” She pulls you in and hugs you loosely. “Love, some people don’t walk away well.”

“It… it can’t be related to that.” You say after a moment. “I’m certain.”

“Oh?”

“… Alvida, you… can not breathe a word of this.” You assert, looking up at her from the loose hug you’re still in.

“On pain of death, (Y/N).” She vows, putting a hand up.

“It was the CEO.” You say and feel her entire body tense for a second.

“Are-you-shitting-me?” She hisses quickly, leaning in even closer to you and trying to keep her voice down.

You shake your head. “I was surprised too.”

Alvida puts a hand to her mouth for a moment and looks around, thinking. “You should tell him.”

“What?!” You bark before lowering your voice. “No. No way. Alvida, I… I had mind-shatteringly good sex with the C. E. O. of this company and left while he was sleeping.” You practically growl the words at her. “I’m looking for a new job after this auction, I can’t ask him for help!”

“Are you being fired?”

“No-! No, I’m not. I’m quitting on my own.” You assure her. “I… don’t…” You purse your lips and look away.

“Oh, honey.” Alvida hugs you tightly. “I’m sorry.”

“… It’s alright.” You manage to keep your voice even as you hug her back. “I’m not even thirty. I’ll, I dunno, move, find new work, move on. It’ll be alright.”

“I know, but it hurts right now, and I’m sorry you fell so hard.” She says, patting your back gently.

“Haa, yeah. Me too.” You admit.

#Quicksand #Sir Crocodile #Crocodile x reader #crocodile x y/n #one piece smut #one piece fanfiction #modern au #reader insert #yandere #Quicksand Alternative Chapter

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