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sukirichi · 3 years

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[ BROKEN RECORDS : 006. ]

→ heartbroken after breaking up with his ex, suna rintaro hits up an old flame to ease the pain. or at least using you to get someone off his mind was what he intended, until suna realizes that maybe, you were the real one he truly wanted to forget.

cw. suggestive. undertones of angst. toxic characters. cursing. explicit dirty talk. implications of unhealthy relationships.

notes. reblogs / feedbacks / comments are appreciated <33

series masterlist

[ playing track 006. ] → we had our flaws i’ll be the first to admit, and we both struggled to commit. but oh, was it really that bleak?

If you look up the definition of a breakup, you’d get various answers such as to end a romance, to bring to an end, or one of Suna’s favorites – to destroy. Under the dark sky mirroring the sudden hollowness of his soul, he tried to find a reason, tried to understand exactly what ‘breaking up’ meant. He wondered if it truly was the end of a romance before shaking his head to himself, amused because how do you stop romance?

Was it when he ceased in giving you flowers, that fluttery feeling in his chest fading into a silent voice each time your eyes lit up in joy?

Or would it stop when he stopped sending you cheesy messages, voice hoarse and heavy with sleep but eager to be the first to hear your voice anyway?

Because if that were to be the definition, then neither of you broke up. The romance never stopped. Even with the weeks that passed since graduation, Suna still laced his hands with yours. He never got tired of leaving little kisses at the pads of your knuckles, a silent understanding from the both of you that yes, we may be over, but I need you. I need your touch. I need you to be close because I don’t have anyone else.

Suna would eradicate that definition if only he could. Nothing ended for him, and he most definitely didn’t lose you. Not completely, anyway, but he felt it. He noticed the slow yet steady way pieces of you disappeared from his life.

In the first week, it was the photographs on the wall. He'd gone out of his way to catch a bus for the next town when the local bookstore ran out of decorative strings, surprising you the next day when you see all your Polaroids clipped and intertwined with fairy lights. Now, he’d taken them off his wall, leaving nothing but a blank slate of a past who’d unknowingly waited for you to splash colors onto it.

In the second week, his closet grew more space. Little by little, you moved out and packed your things back to the true place you called home. He should’ve known then, how unreachable you were – how out of your league he was – for he had to crane his neck in your building, that voice at the back of his head wondering what you could be doing. Reading a book, maybe? Or had you fallen asleep on the couch again out of laziness to move to the bed? Normally, it wouldn’t be a problem. You had him to move you for that, but who were you with? Did you even come home from work? Were you getting enough rest?

No matter how much the curiosity and longing set his heart ablaze, Suna never got the courage to send you a text. Your name was still saved into his device with a heart right next to it, but in the third week, he deleted that symbol.

It truly wasn’t a big deal the longer he mulled about it. It was just a fucking emoji, yet it didn’t feel that way. He'd lost not only his girlfriend but also his best friend.

A break-up, a heartbreak, a breaking point – weren’t they all the same things?

He'd tried them all. He'd done everything he could to soothe the ache in his heart, slept with others in hopes they'd warm the sides of his bed where you were supposed to be until his heart burned with the strong alcohol numbing his existence. None of them worked. Each time he finished, he'd frown upon the realization it wasn't you. The girl with him wouldn't kiss the top of his heart like you always did, fingers drawing an 'X' shape above it as promise you'd nurture that heart no matter what.

On the fourth week, Suna began to accept it.

On the fifth week, Suna was invited to join the national training for the country's men's volleyball team, meeting all sorts of talented players that for a while, he forgot about it. He stopped looking at his phone each fucking second in hopes you'd text. His device would remain shut unless he had important messages from his coach, and he was so close to changing numbers when a knock came to his door around the seventh week.

“What's up, bedhead?” you greeted, snug in knitted gloves and cold air gushing out of your lips from the season. Glancing inside his half-empty house, you lifted a shoulder. “Can I come in?”

Suna opened the door before he became aware of what he was doing. Like instinct, he had open arms when it came to you. “Well, this is our house. Was our house, so you’re welcome to drop by anytime,” he mumbled awkwardly, watching as you plopped down onto the same leather couch you’d spent countless times making out with him from. The memory brought a grimace to his face – more so out of nostalgia than disgust. “I heard you were immediately promoted in the company; explains why you’d been so busy these days. Do you want beer – the cherry flavored ones are your favorite and...ah, shit we ran out of it.”

“Rin.”

Suna ignored you, head shoved inside the refrigerator as he rummaged through it. “There’s still some cake here. My mom baked us some for our graduation but I don’t know if it’s still edible and—”

“Rin.”

“—But you don’t care about that right? You probably ate before coming here, so just get to the point already. I know you wouldn’t have come here unless you needed something. What is it? Did you want the rest of your stuff back?—”

“Rintaro,” your voice boomed over the room, “Why are you acting like this? I came here to talk to you.”

Talk to me? He wanted to scoff. You had plenty of chance to talk to him if you just bothered to open his messages or pick up his calls, but you were too far ahead that he eventually grew tired of running after a person who never wanted to be chased in the first place. If only he could, Suna would’ve told you to leave the moment your face popped from the door.

“I don't want to talk or look at you right now,” Suna admitted as he slouched against the countertops, arms crossed on his chest. “Whatever you came here for, just get it over with.”

“Are you mad because I broke up with you?”

“No.”

“Then what is it?”

When his eyes snapped up to meet yours, you flinched at the heat in his gaze – something so unbecoming of a man usually so unbothered like Rintaro.

“I’m mad that you humiliated me then left,” he gritted his teeth, “You never even gave me the chance to explain myself or talk it out with you. Like always, you’re deciding things by yourself again. You couldn’t even give me a warning. It was our fucking graduation, Y/N, you couldn’t have thought of another time to break up? You broke up with me like you were so fucking desperate to just get rid of me already, so yeah, I don’t want to see you here. I don’t even understand why you had to come back when you’re obviously much happier without me.”

“Who said that?” you countered, making your way to him and stopping when Suna took a step back. Voice growing softer, your shoulders slumped at the sight of Suna’s blatant walls keeping you at a safe distance. “Who told you I was happier without you?”

“Don’t give me this bullshit. You broke up with me.”

“I told you I would never stay, did I? Why didn’t you listen? From the beginning, I’ve made my boundaries clear. Both of us knew what we were getting into when we started dating—”

“That’s exactly why I can’t hate you!” a vein popped in his neck at his outburst, back pushing off the countertop as he found himself an arm’s length away from you. You cowered under his gaze, eyes widening yet he couldn’t stop. “I can’t hate you because you’re right – I do know where I stand yet I wanted more, okay? I was selfish. Fuck, maybe I was even in love with you,” pinching the bridge of his nose, Suna’s head fell into his hand. “You told me you wouldn’t stay and fine, fuck, but is it a sin to wish maybe you didn’t mean it?”

Your mouth closed and opened, dumbfounded at his confession. Hesitantly, you reached up to slide a hand down his arm, offering the most comforting smile you could muster despite the fact you couldn’t even cheer yourself up.

“We can still be friends, Rintaro. I’m here with you right now, not as your girlfriend, but we’ll be fine. You and I...haven’t we always been best friends who pushed through everything?”

“Yeah,” he let out weakly, succumbing to the power you had over him with just one touch. Taking a step forward, Suna crushed you in his arms, burying his nose at the top of your head. He released a long sigh, the realization dawning onto him now that this was all he ever wanted. He was a simple man; Suna simply wished to have you close, in his arms, in his presence, in his world – that he lied through his teeth if it meant patching up the cracks left in his heart.

If this was all he could get, this was all he’d take.

“You’re my best friend and you’re so annoying. I want to kick you out but I also want to hug you right now.”

“Then come here,” you mumbled even though your bodies were already squished, your arms coming up to pat his back that began to shake under your touch. His sniffles were barely audible when he muffled it from your hair. “We’ll be fine, Rintaro. You’ll be fine. It’s going to be hard for a little while, but I promise you’ll always have me, alright? I’m your best friend. I can stay as that,” you promised, grateful that he didn’t dare comment on the dampness on his shirt. “You’re going to fall in love with someone who’s really meant for you, Rintaro. And when you do meet that person, it’s like the pain never happened in the first place.”

“But she’s not you.”

“No, but she’ll be so much better,” you consoled him with an empty laugh. Prying his arms off of you, you leaned back to cradle his face, warmth blanketing both your bodies as Suna leaned into your touch – eyes vulnerable and shiny with tears. “My best friend deserves only the best, yeah?”

“What if you’re the best I ever had?” he mumbled, gripping your wrist with an undeniable possessiveness. “What if I don’t want anyone else?”

“Don’t say that, silly,” you poked his forehead with the shake of your head. Suna opened his mouth to speak, ready to win you over again with the smoothness of his words when you pushed him in the direction of the bathroom. “Now stop moping and shave that shadow of yours. You’re really scruffy and it itches my skin.”

Suna swallowed everything he wanted to say.

There were lots – he wanted to scream and whisper sweet nothings to you at the same time – but your mere reflection on the mirror as you stood behind him, humming a familiar tune under your breath while preparing the shaving foam, Suna forgot to think properly. How could he, when the person he loved and yearned for the most trapped him against the skin, delicate hands cradling his face? He felt so weak in your presence, such a slave to his emotions that Suna clamped his lips shut. He allowed you to do whatever you wanted to do to him. Hurt him, nick him, choke him – he’d long accepted he was crazy and insensible as long as it came to you.

If there was one thing that made sense to him, it was the undeniable fact this was where he wanted to stay. Even if you couldn’t be with him the way he badly wanted to be, as long as you had your eyes on him, as long as your touch served as a constant reminder you were still real – then he’d be happy.

Before he knew it, Suna caught your hand, stopping it in its track from washing the foam off his face. “Best friends?” he croaked out, “We’re going to stay as best friends?”

“I promise, Suna. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Okay,” he surrendered, arms dropping at the sides of his body as he closed his eyes in bliss. Seven weeks and counting, just like that, his heartbreak went down the drain all from the same person who caused it. “Then I’ll stay here too.”

Much to everyone’s surprise, you and Suna remained good friends. Or best friends, as you constantly reassured, showing up a few minutes late into his first game as an official player for the country’s team. Suna quickly hopped over to the bleachers where you reached over for him, handing him a towel and bottle of water. “You really came,” he smirked, accepting the towel with a grateful nod. “Who would’ve thought?”

You’d been so busy with helping your mother with work he understood if you couldn’t arrive. Yet here you were, forever surprising him that he wondered why he hadn’t died from heart attacks yet. Because in all honesty, Suna nearly choked when he saw a familiar figure busting through the arena in a nearby door.

“You're playing for the Nationals, of course, I'd come!” you gushed, pinching your shirt upwards to show his bored face doodled onto the material. RINTARO was printed above the doodle in big, bold letters. “Look, I even got your fanmade merch. Does it look good on me?”

Hiding his smirk through the water bottle, Suna nodded. “Yeah, my face looks good on your tits.”

“Oh, you’re slick,” you punched his arm, pulling a series of chuckles from him. Suna capped the bottle and handed it back to you, head ducked down automatically before he felt your hands drying his hair damp with sweat.

He smiled at the ground, feeling like he was dating you all over again. Of course, he knew better than anyone it wasn’t like that, but he was glad to know things hadn’t changed. To him, the break-up wasn’t real. The romance never ended, and nothing was ever destroyed between the two of you. You only lost the labels, but when it came down to it, if you were here and he was always right by your side, then it was all the same. He was still yours. You were still his.

“Go and win the game, idiot, or else I’m not treating your entire team to dinner tonight.”

His teammate perked up at the mention of the word treat, hopping over to where Suna had to crane his neck from the height of the bleachers. “Yo, Y/N, do you really mean that?”

“Of course!”

“She’s Rintaro’s sugar mommy.”

“She’s not my fucking sugar mommy, she’s my best friend,” Suna corrected his other teammate, cheeks growing flush at everyone’s snickers. It didn’t help that you also had your head thrown back in laughter, leaning over the rails just to wiggle your brows at him. Through his irritated facade, however, havoc wreaked his insides from happiness. Mine, he thought, you’re still mine. “You shouldn’t have said that. Dinner with just the two of us would’ve been better.”

“But I want to congratulate you and your team for your first win!”

Pumped by the free dinner – and his bastard of teammates wasn't the least bit ashamed to abuse your wallet knowing you wouldn't bat an eye – his team played better than they expected, easily dominating their opponent halfway through the first set. In the blink of an eye, EJP Raijin won.

Suna stepped away from his horde of team members rushing over to hug him, his quick legs bringing him right beside you. You’d ran down from the bleachers to crush him into an embrace, uncaring of his sweat making your skin slip past one another.

Basking in the attention you showered him with, Suna hadn't even realized he was gazing at you adoringly – too lost in his world that he failed to notice the figure tapping his shoulder. “Hi, uhm, Suna...?” coming face to face with a girl wearing the same fan merch shirt, Suna raised a brow. He forgot you were there for a moment. “I’m Mari, I’ve been a huge fan of yours since you were announced to be on the team. Do you, uhm, do you mind if I have a photo with you?” raising a phone decorated in gemstones, Mari laughed shyly behind her hands before glancing your way. “If it’s okay with your girlfriend, of course. I’m just a fan.”

“No, go ahead. You can even ask for an autograph if you want. Sunarin and I are just friends, so feel free!” you grinned at Mari, “Wait, give me your phone. I’ll take the photo.”

“Thank you so much!” she giggled, happily placing herself beside an awkward, stiff Suna. As the both of them stood before you, Mari couldn’t help but stare at your features. “You’re really pretty, by the way. I’m surprised to know you and Suna aren’t dating since I see you both together a lot.”

Suna frowned in confusion, and Mari shook her hands in defense. “Ah, I didn’t mean it like that. She’s just...kind of everywhere on the internet. The national athlete and the famous heiress – you guys look really good together!”

“She’s my best friend. We’re not dating, I assure you.”

“Oh,” Mari paused, twisting her body to the side as she clutched Suna’s biceps, gazing up at him with big, doe eyes that Suna couldn’t help but blink in wonder.

She had really pretty eyes...and a stunning smile. Now that he looked closer, Suna admired Mari’s beauty and her refreshing aura of innocence – shocking him to his core when she boldly asked, “Then, Suna, if I may be bold to ask – are you free tonight now that the game is done? I’d love to treat you for dinner.”

“Lovebirds,” you cooed as you captured everything on camera, “The start of a love story... would you look at that.”

The start of a love story... Suna didn't understand what you meant by that. What was a love story, anyway? Was it similar to the memories he shared with you? Could it be the experiences he had before meeting you when he casually hooked up with girls whose names he couldn't remember for the life of him? He wasn't sure if your time with him counted as a love story either, because what kind of romance novels had their two lovers in a chance encounter at some dingy, cramped frat house's bathroom – his cock in your mouth and your face in his head until he found you again?

Suna kept looking for the answers. With you, he understood what romance meant. You told him enough about your fantasies of stargazing, having slow, romantic kisses, and sharing intimacy under a broken street lamp in a cramped alley. With you, he never had to think twice, but with Mari, he began to question just how much he was capable of feeling.

He skipped your offer of a free dinner when he had his first win, settling for Mari's invitation instead. More so out of curiosity, and also because this demonic voice in his head told him it could be one way to win you back. He hoped you'd be jealous until his plan backfired. Now he was beginning to look forward to Mari's cheerful texts, or her random messages attached with photos of flowers and cats she saw on the way to art school.

Mari...was like a breath of fresh air. She made him feel young all over again. Suna, more often than not, reflected on his younger days when all he cared about was sharing a good laugh with pretty girls. He loved how Mari was easily flustered at the smallest things he did, finding it amusing she was so innocent even with accidental gestures.

It brought out a side of him he didn’t know he had. This need to keep her close, this eagerness to be the first she thought of as soon as she woke up. She gave him all the attention he wanted from you.

[ SUNA; dumdum : 7:13PM ]

dude

you will not believe this

i’m actually going on a date

:’(

[ YOU ; tweedledee ; 7:15PM ]

congratssss

wait what’s the sad face for, is she not nice

i thought mari was nice

[ SUNA; dumdum : 7:16PM ]

she issss

she’s very sweet and pretty

we’ll go out for some dinner when she’s free but idk i’m nervous

aaaahhh

[ YOU ; tweedledee ; 7:17PM ]

THE suna rintaro is nervous???

where did my best friend go

he was so smooth and confident, why are u nervous now

you act like you didn’t date sixteen others in uni lol

[ SUNA; dumdum : 7:19PM ]

i don’t wanna fuck it up

she’s really nice, y/n. i haven’t felt this happy in a while

[ YOU ; tweedledee ; 7:20PM ]

you’ll be fine

just be urself

that’s corny but ykwim

don’t overthink it babe

[ SUNA; dumdum : 7:27 PM ]

u lost your babe card privileges months ago

date me again and u can have it back

[ YOU ; tweedledee ; 7:29 PM ]

i’m busy with work dumbass

text me about the date or call me, whatever u want

[ SUNA; dumdum : 7:27 PM ]

alright

wish me luck

[ YOU ; tweedledee ; 7:29 PM ]

good luck

have fun <33

i’m so happy for you

[ SUNA; dumdum : read 7: 30 PM ]

Suna’s first official date with Mari as her boyfriend remained fresh in your memory. It happened a few months after your break-up, your presence becoming less frequent and scarcer as the duties of manager had been passed down to you. A few years down the line, you’d become CEO, then take over the company your mother and her ancestors had worked so hard for. People praised you for being a dutiful daughter, skilled and sharp in your work, yet you couldn't care less about it. The only reason you stayed day and night was to keep a close on your sleazy father. You had to ensure he knew his right place, and he'd never be able to even breathe in the same space as your mother's.

One night, you'd retired from work after hearing your father had already gone back to the hospital to look after his wife. You were on your way to Nagisa’s apartment, ready to drop her groceries anonymously like you did every end of the month when a familiar sound of deep laughter could be heard.

Stumbling out of a shrimp restaurant, Mari clutched Suna’s arms, who was pecking her cheeks with soft, repeated kisses that had her giggling. They were cute – was the first thing you thought – until you witnessed something you were sure shouldn’t have been for the eyes of others.

So that was why Suna stopped replying to your texts. Ever since he and Mari started dating, you seldom heard from Suna. You didn’t think too much of it as you were busy as well, but now you could see for yourself the truth.

Suna was distancing himself from you.

He was beginning to fall in love with Mari. On the few times he did text, it would always be about Mari this and Mari that. He’d send you cute photos of them, even going as far as to ask you to unfollow him on social media because it made his girlfriend uncomfortable. In a flash, you’d lost your best friend in the arms of his lover, and the worst of it all?

You weren’t even mad.

This was what you wanted for him. You hoped he’d find his happiness, and if it was Mari who’d give him the one thing you weren’t capable of sharing with Suna, then so be it. Anything to alleviate the pain you caused. Anything to fill the void you’d left him.

“Ma’am?” your chauffer’s voice cut you off from your trance, causing your head to snap away from the two lovebirds now kissing under the neon lights. “Are you not coming in?”

“Sorry. Let’s go home now.”

[ present time. ]

“Is that our beloved princess Y/N?”

“Osamu! I’ve missed you so much!” you threw yourself into the arms of your old friend, laughing when he spun you around over his counter. Setting you down, Osamu gasped – having not seen each other since graduation, you nearly forgot what the other looked like. Other than his hair being freshly cut and the pack of muscles sitting behind his fitted black shirt, Osamu hadn’t changed much.

“Wow, you’ve grown bigger! Atsumu’s not gonna like that, you know. He’s going to think you’re intentionally trying to be more attractive than him.”

“Please. ‘Tsumu’s on national television; he gets more girls than I do.”

“How is he and Maddie, by the way? I heard they just had their second anniversary.”

“They’re sappy lovebirds as always,” Osamu rolled his eyes, and you nodded as a smile made its way onto your face.

Dating Suna when Atsumu pined over you wasn't easy to accept for the blond twin. Fortunately, Atsumu met Maddie right after graduation, and the two hit it off ever since. Osamu, on the other hand, opened up his onigiri shop – which you were now visiting after opening a box of old photos way back from your college days. It could be also blamed on the fact you'd been reminiscing of your college days, but whatever the true reason may be you found yourself here, you couldn't deny you felt all the worries ease from your shoulders.

Or you were desperately searching for the Suna in the past.

“To go or are you going to honor me with a dine-in with the usual I made for you back in uni? I could do with catching up with an old friend. Ever since you and Suna broke up, the rest of us just stopped hanging out. ‘Sure do miss the old days,” Osamu shook his head as he recalled the memories, a grimace flashing on his face when he saw you fidget in your seat. “Oh no, I know that look. Is it Suna again?”

“It’s Mari.”

“Oh, her. I never liked that girl,” he took off his cap and sat beside you, two glasses of beer placed on the table. It was too early to be drinking, especially when you had to go back to work in an hour or two, but there was never a wrong time to let alcohol take over. “She was way too clingy and posting Suna everywhere on her Insta.”

“She has the right; they were dating. Or more like they’ll be together again soon enough,” you snorted as you took a swig, “You know how Suna is. He’s secretly crushing on Mari harder than he’d like to admit.”

“I still stand by what I said; there’s something about Mari that doesn’t feel right,” Osamu mumbled. The ringing of a bell signaled a new customer, his eyes drifting off to the front door before he shot up in his seat. “Kita, holy shit! You’re here!”

“Language, ‘Samu. You don’t want to scare off your customers,” a deep, steady voice ordered. Like he was compelled by Kita’s voice, Osamu scratched the back of his head, bowing deep in apology. Kita offered him a handsome smile, slender fingers pressing down on his suit when his brown eyes landed on your cowering form. “Y/N.”

Ah, shit. You should’ve known ducking wouldn’t work against Kita’s observant nature.

Smiling awkwardly under your batted eyelashes, your hands rubbed up and down your arms. “Hey, Kita...”

The sides of Kita’s lips curled up in amusement.

“Oh great, you guys already know each other so I don’t need to introduce you anymore,” Osamu piped in, taking note of the confusion still written all over your face. He plopped down next to Kita who had invited himself to your table, the latter loosening his tie. Not once did he take his gaze off yours until you were biting the insides of cheeks, embarrassment flooding your system. God, how were you supposed to apologize after running away like that?

“Kita and I played in the same team in high school for volleyball, but then he had to move overseas for some fancy boarding school, right, Kita-san?”

“You don’t have to tell her my life story, ‘Samu. We’re business partners.”

“Huh. Small world,” Osamu mused, nudging Kita’s shoulder. “The usual?”

Nodding, Osamu was soon up to his feet to get your orders. Despite already being in the same quarters as you, Kita gestured your way, his smile polite and voice smooth as silk as ever. “Do you mind if I share a table with you?”

You groaned into your hands, unable to handle it anymore. If Kita was fucking around with you by being placid and unbothered as ever, then it was working. You could only hope this didn’t taint your precious reputation. “Listen, Kita, I’m sorry about the other day. I understand if you'd want to cut off ties with us, I've embarrassed our company—”

Kita’s chortles halted your rambling.

“Is that how you see me as, Y/N?” he inspected his glass before peering up at you, “Whatever happened the other night was between man and woman – not business partners. I reassure you that you don’t have to think anything of it. I’m not offended at all,” he reassured, extending his hand for you to shake. “Let’s put it all behind us and start new?”

You eagerly shook his hand. “Yeah. Yeah, I’d love that. Seriously though, is there nothing I can do for you? I’m extremely embarrassed about my mistakes.”

“You can always go on another date with me – only if you want, of course.”

Pausing, you bit back an amused laugh. He must’ve really liked you – for whatever reason known to man you couldn’t decipher – if he still wanted to go on another date after two failed ones. Still, it worked in your favor. And you'd be lying if you said you weren't interested in the thought of picking up where you left off.

“A date sounds good, I’m down for that,” you told him, leaning forwards on the table while Kita’s eyes glinted. “So tell me your preferences. I want to make our third first date as mind-blowing as possible. Ah, wait, let me guess. Fancy rooftop dinners in sky towers? Aquarium dates? You look like you'd like looking at fish. Maybe use a starfish as a temporary bracelet; some aquariums like that,” gasping, you slammed your hand down on the table. “No, you’d look totally cute in pufferfish hats, though! The ones they have in the little gift shops at aquarium lobbies!”

“You know a lot about aquariums.”

“Uhm, yeah,” you blinked back, your words leaving a bitter aftertaste upon the realization. “My dad would always take me to them during the weekends when I was younger. He knows marine animals help calm my mother down when she’s tired from work, so I can navigate the local aquarium with the back of my palm.”

“Then let’s go with what you’ll enjoy, Y/N. I’ll be happy with whatever you choose.”

“That’s not how it works, Kita. I’m the one asking you out, so for me to blow your mind and steal your heart, I need to make sure our date is going to be like no other.”

“Steal my heart?” Kita tipped his head to the side, his smile growing ever wider. “I thought this was supposed to be a friendly date.”

Heat spread like wildfire all over your body; tingles licking up your legs until you were babbling in surprise. “I didn’t mean it like that; it just slipped,” you defended, and Kita's eyes formed into half-moons when he laughed. Yes, that sweet laughter that could guarantee any sane person to drop down their knees for him. Now, you weren’t a stranger when it came to teasing. You’d had enough experience with Suna to be confident you had loads of tricks under your sleeve, but something about Kita had you squirming in your seat, desperately trying to regain your composure. “So? Seriously, no preferences? I’m going to surprise you then?”

Kita hummed in thought. “Fine. I’ll tell you what my ideal date is like, but you don’t have to make it to be exactly like that,” once you encouraged him to continue, Kita closed his mouth again, palm covering his mouth as he mumbled, “I’ve also never told anyone about it before since my father plans my blind dates for me, so I might sound stupid...”

“No, I promise you won’t! Come on, tell me, tell me.”

He scratched his cheek that turned a fair shade of red, “It’s always been my dream to visit an art museum with a pretty girl. The thought of admiring art, then admiring them, it sounds pretty romantic to me. It’s intimate and peaceful,” he shrugged, eyes widening at your lack of response. “Ah, that sounded better in my head.”

You sighed dreamily, picturing the same scene Kita had in his head. “That's cute. Don't worry about it; I can get us tickets. Now, I need to know your favorite artist.”

By the time Osamu came, you and Kita had long been immersed in a conversation of the artists whose works he wanted to see. You were never interested in art, much less know what they contributed since music was more your thing, but Kita never made you feel stupid for not knowing. If anything, he was more than delighted to tell you all about it, and Osamu tended to the other customers on his own accord.

Like it always was with Kita, time flew faster than you noticed. It was way beyond your lunch break when Kita got behind your wheel. He reached over and you waited with bated breath, for a kiss – for something – only for his hands to grab at the seatbelt. “Safety first,” he whispered, hot breath tickling your collarbones. You chuckled to yourself, silently giving him credit if he intended to fluster you. Though judging by the passiveness on his face, Kita was oblivious.

“Did you have to drive me back, Kita? Your office is the other way around.”

“I have a meeting with your mother.”

You bit the insides of your cheek. Sometimes, it was easy to forget just how close your company was to Kita's family in terms of business. It made sense if both of your parents grabbed any opportunity to be comfortable around them.

When you both got to the office, Kita opened the door for you like the gentleman he was. He even offered you his hand as you stepped out, your eyes narrowed suspiciously at him if he was this nice to everybody or simply had...other intentions. Not that you cared, since you’d sleep with him; no questions asked.

“Is that the boss and the Kita Shinsuke?” an employee gushed as you walked inside the lobby, multiple heads turning your way. “They look so good together!”

“People sure are talking,” Kita noticed, “Have rumors spread over our date, Y/N? That was fast.”

“I have no idea what’s going on, but it’s embarrassing. They’re all looking at us,” goosebumps ran under your skin through your dress, your smile forced as your employees began chatting and giggling amongst themselves. The worst thing that could happen to you would be a dating rumor, with Kita of all people! If the wrong things spread around, you’d have to be forced to be committed to Kita for the sake of keeping up appearances – the same tragic fate your parents went through.

Seeing as Kita entered the same elevator as you did, his body close enough your shoulders were brushing and all the other people in the room were pursing their lips, you hissed at him. “What’re you doing? If you stick closer to me they’re going to assume we’re official.”

“The elevator is cramped. I don’t have a choice,” he declared, “Floor 40, please.”

Dreadful. That was the only way you could describe the solid minute of the ride. As much as you knew Kita truly came here for business, you didn't want to risk people getting the wrong idea. This was why when you got to your mother's floor, you immediately stepped out of the suffocating elevator, taking in a breath of fresh air along with the sunlight streaming through the windows.

“Shinsuke, my, look at how you’ve grown!” your mother popped out of her office, her heels clicking against the ground. “I remember when you were just this tall and now you’re so handsome and strong! Such a really great kid...oh, there you are, dear! Did you guys meet together in the lobby?”

You tore your gaze away from the scar running down your mother’s face. “No, he drove me here. We met outside while having lunch.”

“Already meeting him for lunch? My daughter moves quick, huh. You didn’t learn that from me, of course. Your flirty genes came from your father’s.”

“Mom!”

“Sorry, Shinsuke! It’s fun teasing my daughter, you see,” she jabbed at your shoulder, her split-second motherly glare a clear threat for you to behave before she was all friendly over Kita again. “On a more serious note, however, it’s good that both of you are here. I’ve already talked with Mrs. Kita about your plans of extending your resort chain to the closest beach district in Ishigaki, but the biggest empty property can’t be bought from the landlord because she refuses to sell it to your company, right, Shinsuke?”

“Yes, Ma’am. From what I’ve heard, she has mistrust in our company with the way some of my father’s staff came to visit her drunk. It was a fault on our part.”

“You don’t need to worry about it anymore, Shinsuke! The landlord is the relative of a close friend of mine, so we went ahead and bought it, then loaned it to your company,” stepping inside her room, you and Kita followed. Your mother’s hips sashayed as she scrolled all over her iPad, glasses perched atop her nose while her lips moved from what she was reading. “Both of your schedules have been cleared. You head out to the resort tonight; see for yourselves what else you need. Our company will be providing the construction materials for the resort and... honestly, you’re all grown. You decide for yourselves,” she placed her device down, glasses pointed towards you. “And you need to be more responsible. You’ll take over soon.”

“Mom, you can’t just clear my schedules—”

“Dear, you didn’t have anything else to do,” she crossed her arms on her chest, “You can take this opportunity to get to know Shinsuke better. He’s a really sweet guy.”

“Suna has a match, Mom. He expects me to be there.”

Your mother’s gaze darkened, flickering over Kita’s stoic features for a moment. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she forced a smile. “You can't be there for him all the time, sweetie. And if he was your friend, he'll understand you're going to have to put your professional life first when duty calls.”

“Fine,” you snapped, “But I’m leaving early once we’ve done everything we’re supposed to. I’m not missing his game for anything else.”

The drive back to Suna’s apartment was a long, distressing one. Traffic went on for hours, and your mother wouldn’t stop yapping to you over the phone on how you ‘needed to get over Sunarin.’ What did she know? You and Suna were best friends. How many times did you have to tell her there’d be nothing more than that?

Still, no matter how much you complained and bruised your knuckles by repeatedly honking, her words were final. Your business trip had long been finalized.

The least you could do was let Suna know, to reassure him that Mari coming back and you nearly confessing your feelings for him didn't change a thing about your friendship. Even if he did the shitty thing by kicking you out of his apartment as soon as Mari caught you red-handed, naked, and ready to claw her throat out the moment she wrapped her nails around Suna’s neck once more.

This wasn’t about you – it was about saving Suna from the horrendous fate lying in wait for him if he fell for Mari’s trap all over again.

You needed to listen to your instincts that she was fucked in the head.

Taking two steps at a time, you knocked rapidly at his door, shifting your weight from foot to foot as you prepared your string of apologies. “Rin, hey—” you stopped in your tracks, Mari’s face coming face to face with yours. She leaned against the door frame, dressed only in Suna’s hoodie and hickeys present all over his face. How did you know? Well, Mari should get an award for best actress of the year with the way she flipped her hair to the side for you to get front row seats of their fornication.

“Oh...I’m sorry. I didn’t know you’d be here.”

“Seems like Rintaro doesn’t tell you everything, after all.”

“I didn’t come here to fight, Mari,” you sighed, “Could you please tell him I’ll be away for a week? I’ve got a business trip coming up and I might not be able to talk to him either. I’ll make it to his game, though—”

“Suna doesn’t need you to be there for his games. I’m his girlfriend again; so you need to back off.”

“I’m coming as a friend.”

“You know damn well he doesn’t see you as just a friend.”

You let out a dark, bitter laugh that forced a lump down your throat. Whether it was because the day was already going terribly and you just had to be tested for your patience like there was no tomorrow, you could only feel one thing at that moment: total and utter frustration. “Good to know you’re aware of where you stand then, Mari,” you retorted, watching as Mari’s eyebrows pinched together. “I’ve been nothing but supportive of your relationship, but don’t get me wrong. Hurt Suna one more time and I’ll cut you out of his life. Remember that he’s only with you because I’m the one he can’t have. You’re nothing but a temporary replacement I allow to stand in my place.”

A vein popped from her neck. “Fuck you!”

“He already did,” leaning down to her ear where you heard her fume under you, you smirked. “And you know you can’t compare.”

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matsbarzal · 3 years

Note

fluff #12 with barzy :)

fluff #12. couldn't imagine my life without you

word count: 1.6k pairing: mat barzal x reader

Mathew Barzal knew how to throw a party. He knew what beer to get, he knew what food to order, the people to invite, Mat knew how to plan a party for his friends. God, he even knew how to plan a party for his family.

But, Mathew Barzal did not know how to plan an anniversary.

He had begged you for a hint, any indication of how you wanted to spend your two-year anniversary. The Islander’s forward would send you Pinterest links daily, Instagram posts when he found them, anything he could find that may encourage you to give him some hint of how you wanted to spend your special day.

You had planned the entire anniversary dinner the year prior, just something for the two of you, nothing serious or dramatic for your first anniversary together as a couple. Mat loved it, loved the privacy and the intimacy of the date you had planned, loved how much effort you put into him and the gift you bought him. It could have been a date to McDonald’s, and he still would’ve loved every second of it.

“Baby… do you like this resort? Tito said the Bahamas are beautiful this time of year, and him and Em stayed in this resort last summer.”

Taking the offered phone from his hand, you scrolled through the page on the screen. It was a gorgeous resort, a popular one from the looks of it, definitely a resort you wouldn’t necessarily mind getting the chance to visit one day.

“It’s gorgeous, but not for our anniversary. I don’t want you having to do anything extreme, Mat, honestly. Dinner and a movie would be perfect, as long as I get to spend the day with you.”

Pouting at you, his only response was a quick press of his lips to the side of your head before making his way back into the living room, mumbling under his breath something that you couldn’t hear.

Hearing your phone ding from beside you, you picked it up to peer at the message that appeared on the screen. Since when did Anthony text you?

Please say yes to something before I lose my mind. Mat can’t plan shit, and I can only replan your anniversary so many times. I’m begging, I have a life pls just say yes

Laughing at the text message on screen, your reply back was a simple shrug emoji. You knew Mat had been utilizing his best friend and his girlfriend, trying to plan the most perfect day for your anniversary, but you wanted Mat to plan something he’d enjoy, something that would make him just as happy as it would make you. And he knew that, but he was always one to put your feelings and your happiness above his own.

anything he plans will be perfect, go back to barking or sum tito

Two weeks had panned out in between Anthony and Mat bothering you for ideas, and the actual date of the anniversary. Since telling Tito that anything planned would be perfect, neither man had pestered you about it, opting to disregard any mention of the anniversary or the event in question.

You knew Mat had something planned, his phone slamming down on the couch whenever you passed behind him, or his laptop screen slamming shut every time you got close enough. You had debated sneaking around, trying to figure out what he had planned, but you didn’t want to ruin the surprise he had obviously worked so hard on.

“I planned everything down to the last little thing. Your outfit is on the bed in our room, we have to be ready to go by exactly 5:59, any earlier and we’ll be too early, any later and we’ll be late… and I can’t be late.”

Laughing at the rush of words ripping out of his mouth, you squeezed his arm gently as you moved past him and towards your shared bedroom, eyeing the outfit he had laid out on the bed for you. It was a cute outfit, completely your style, but you couldn’t determine any indication of what your boyfriend had planned from the outfit alone.

At precisely 5:59, you allowed Mat to usher you out the door and towards his car, mumbling about how ‘Tito was going to kill him if we were late’, which proceeded to confuse you even more.

“Plan on telling me where we’re going anytime soon?” Shaking his head, all Mat did was grin as he looked towards you.

You watched the houses go by the closer and closer you assumed you were getting to the destination, the area getting more and more familiar the further you drove. Pulled out of your thoughts by the sound of Mat putting the car in park, you eyed the familiar house to your left, a curious glint in your eyes.

“Anders?”

“You’ll see when we get in the backyard, I promise.”

Expecting to be surprised with a multitude of his teammates and your friends, you were shocked to see an empty backyard when Mat released the latch on the gate, the trees glistening in the wind as the almost-empty backyard stared right back at you. A table was placed in the middle of the patio stones, fairy lights wrapped around the edge, the patio chairs pulled out and awaiting the two of you, a bottle of champagne laid in a bucket of ice on the top of the table.

“Anders said I could use his backyard… ya know, cause like… our balcony doesn’t really have much space.”

Laughing in understanding at his words, you allowed him to guide you towards the table, pulling your chair back and then gently pushing you in once you were completely seated. He immediately jumped to the opposite seat, his chair squealing against the ground when he pushed himself in.

“I—”

“I can’t believe you made me buy a whole tuxedo for this, I swear to God, I could’ve done this in sweats.”

Swiveling your body around to look at the source of the voice, Anthony Beauvillier stared back at you, a large grin etched on his face. Decked out in full waiter-attire, and two adorning plates in his hand, you couldn’t contain the grin that slowly started to make its way across your face at the sight.

“Oh yeah, laugh it up, ha ha ha. Just wait until my anniversary, you two are going all out.”

A middle finger from Mat, and a polite thank-you on your behalf were the only responses to Anthony as he made his back towards the sliding doors of Anders Lee’s house, a pep in his step the closer he got to the glass.

Focused solely on the man in front of you, the conversation flowed like it always did, Mathew explaining how he had planned out the entire dinner, what food was going to be made, what dessert, the fact that there were still plans for after and that this was just the beginning. You talked about your day, the last year of your relationship, all the positive ways in which you both constantly demonstrated your love for one another.

You didn’t notice Mat’s hand reaching into the pocket of his coat, his utensils disposed of on the tablecloth in front of you, his palms sweaty as he tried to gently wipe them against his pants without alerting you to any movements.

“I… I wanted to talk to you about something,” quirking your eyes at the sound of his voice and the statement he made, you urged him to continue with a slight tilt of your head.

His chair squealed against the patio stones for the second time that night as he clumsily stood up from his chair, moving around the table so he could grab your hand and pull you from your seat.

“Y/N… I… you’ve been my best friend for the last two years. The person I could come to whenever I needed someone, the one who’s always there for me after a good day, or a bad day. The person who I can depend on for everything, there’s not a day that goes by where I don’t fall in love with you a little more. You stole my heart two years ago, and I have no regrets in the world about you, or my love for you.”

Trying to contain the tears that were threatening to fall, you watched as Mat’s knee dropped out below him, the hand that was in his pocket before now laid out in front of you, the closed jewelry box covering his palm.

“I promise you; no one will work harder to make you happy or cherish you more than I will. I’ll be the man you deserve and more, I know that no one will ever hold my heart the way you do, and I never want another person to. I couldn’t imagine my life without you. Y/N, will you marry me?”

You couldn’t keep the tears at bay as your hand slapped itself across your mouth, the shock and joy at his words taking over every fiber of your being as you aggressively nodded your head, the words muffled behind your hand as Mat’s eyes glistened with unshed tears in your direction.

“A million times, yes. Yes!”

His lips were pressed to yours in a heartbeat, his hand that wasn’t holding the jewelry box cupping your cheek as the tears fell from both of your eyes. His eyes opened to bore into yours, a look of joy etched across his face as he felt the emotions finally takeover.

note: this ended up being a bit more than a blurb... but oh well! thank you for sending one in, and i hope you like it!! <3

#mat barzal #nhl fic #nhl blurb #nhl drabble #mat barzal blurb #mat barzal drabble #nhl imagine #hockey fic #hockey blurb #hockey drabble #mat barzal fic #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal x reader #hockey imagine #nhl blurbs #nhl drabbles #hockey blurbs #hockey drabbles #dj's august prompt list

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dottielovegood · 3 years

Text

ASMR - chapter 2

Elriel fanfiction

About this fic:

Azriel can’t sleep Elain has an ASMR channel Match made in heaven (or you know, on youtube..)

______________________________

Since a few people seemed to enjoy the first chapter, I decided to continue this story. You can find the first chapter here And you can read the story on AO3 here.

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CHAPTER 2

Flower Girl ASMR 1 day ago I am so happy that I could help you sleep, @Shadowsinger <3 ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. It is that tingly feeling you might get from certain sounds. You can also have visual triggers. Supposedly, if you find the right triggers, they will help you relax and they can even help you sleep. I hope that sleep treats you with kindness from now on.

Azriel stared at his screen. She had responded. She had actually responded to his message. He had scrolled through her comment section again to see if she replied to all her messages, but she didn’t. She liked most comments, but she only replied to a few. It made him feel special, which was absurd. Why did he feel special because some girl on the internet had replied to his comment? She had probably already forgotten about it.

But Azriel carried it with him for the rest of the day.

He also carried with him the annoyance of some of the comments he had seen. This girl really needed to learn how to block some words. Especially: boobs, nudes, cock, jerk off, and cum. Azriel made a disgusted face when he thought about it. If they knew each other, he would help her with that.

But they didn’t know each other, so Azriel didn’t have to think about it. Those comments shouldn’t affect Azriel in the slightest. He had read way nastier things on the internet and never cared.

What was it about this girl?

Azriel was sitting at his desk. He was working at Velaris Times – a web-based newspaper that his best friend Rhysand had started a few years ago. He hired Azriel to work in IT and their other friend, Cassian, as a photographer. It was a pretty small newspaper, so they all felt like family there.

Azriel was feeling naturally energized for the first time in his life. He didn’t even need to down his usual three cups of coffee this morning. Cassian was sitting next to him, editing some photos for an article that their co-worker Mor had written.

“You wanna grab some lunch later?” Cassian asked.

Azriel’s eyes didn’t leave his computer, but he nodded in agreement. “Sure. Should we invite Rhys?”

Cassian snorted. “Nah, he’s on that weird health-cleanse, remember? Feyre probably packed him a kale juice and some broccoli.”

Azriel chuckled. Feyre was Rhys’s wife and since they decided to get pregnant, she had been all about healthy eating, to Rhysand’s dismay. He wasn’t even allowed coffee - it was all about the green tea! Some days, Cassian and Azriel ate their lunches at the office which always lead to Rhys staring longingly at their food. It felt like having a dog begging for scraps underneath the dinner table.

“So that’s still going on, huh? I thought he would have given up by now. There’s only that much kale you can eat,” Azriel said.

“Yeah, but he’s whipped. Remember when they first started dating and she served him soup from a can and he ate it like it was a gourmet meal.”

“Fair enough.”

“You know that I can hear you, assholes?” Rhys called from his office. They had been very aware of this fact. Rhys strode out of his office, wearing his usual uniform of a dark suit and a crisp white shirt. Azriel was happy that he worked in IT so he could get away with just wearing black jeans and a black t-shirt - and maybe a hoodie on cold days.

“Are you telling me that Nesta doesn’t have you wrapped around her little finger?” Rhys smirked and leaned against the doorframe.

Cassians ears turned red. “She could never get me to drink kale-smoothies every day.”

Rhys shook his head. “You were pining for her for two years before she even agreed to go on a date with you. She could probably tie you to your bed and get you to call her mistress if she wanted to.”

Cassian leaned back in his chair and gave Rhys a purely male grin. “It wouldn’t be the first time,” he said and wiggled his eyebrows.

“Oh for fucks sake,” Azriel groaned. “Too much information, Cass.”

Cassian shrugged. “Don’t be so sensitive, Az.”

Azriel glared at him. “I’m not sensitive just because I don’t want to hear about your sex life.”

“That’s because you don’t have a sex life,” Cassian muttered under his breath, which elicited a burst of laughter that sounded more like a snort from Rhys.

Azriel shook his head and tried to concentrate on his work, which was almost impossible when his two friends were still staring at him. He could almost feel them scheming.

“Hey, Az. How’s the dating going?” Rhys asked.

Azriel didn’t answer, mostly because the answer would be that it didn’t. He didn’t date. He was tired of going on dates with people he didn’t know. He wasn’t very talkative, so dates were basically his nightmare. And it was even worse when he agreed to download Tinder on a drunken night a few months ago. Dating like that just wasn’t for him. He didn’t want to meet someone on the internet like that.

“You want me to set you up on a blind date?” Cassian asked, and Azriel pretended not to hear him.

“Nesta has some great friends,” he continued. “What about Gwyn?”

Rhys nodded. “Yeah, Gwyn is a nice girl.”

Azriel stared at his friends. “I’ve met Gwyn.”

“So?”

“If I’ve already met her, it’s not a blind date.”

Cassian thought about it for a second and shrugged. “Eh, semantics. Should I tell Nesta to give her a call?”

“No. She’s not my type.”

Truthfully, Gwyn was a very sweet girl. She was cute and funny and determined, but she just wasn’t for Azriel. They had met a few times but there had been no attraction - no sparks. Azriel wanted to feel something from the start. He didn’t want to be in a relationship just to avoid being lonely.

“So, what is your type exactly?” Rhys asked.

An image popped into Azriel’s head. Usually, he couldn’t imagine what his type would be, but now, he saw someone in his mind. She had golden hair and cute little freckles on her nose. She was gentle, kind and calm.

It was Flower Girl ASMR.

Azriel closed his eyes, trying to get the picture of her out of his head. What was wrong with him? He didn’t want to date someone he had only seen in a few videos. That made him as creepy as those assholes in her comment section. He didn’t even know her. He didn’t even know her name.

“I don’t know,” Azriel muttered. “Could you please let me get back to my work?”

And after a few more suggestions of people they could set him up with (he kindly, but firmly, declined), they finally let him work.

That night, Flower Girl ASMR was hosting a livestream on YouTube. Azriel wondered if they might live in the same time zone since the live stream seemed to coincide with a reasonable bedtime for him.

Azriel joined the livestream just a few minutes after it had started. A few hundred people were already logged in. Flower Girl ASMR was sitting in front of a background that looked like the night sky; dark blue and full of fairy lights. Her hair hung in waves around her face and she was wearing a pink top that matched her complexion. Not that Azriel noticed such things, why would he?

She was brushing her camera with a make-up brush, making it look as if she was brushing his face. “I am so happy that you all could join me here tonight,” she whispered into her microphone. “As promised, I was going to host my first livestream when we reached one hundred thousand subscribers, which we did last week.” She smiled at the camera, one of those smiles that reached her eyes. Azriel could feel himself smile back. Which was stupid. She couldn’t see him. “Tonight, you can make requests or ask questions in the comments, and I will answer a few of your questions,” she continued. She was still moving the brush over the screen. The combination of her whispering voice and the visual trigger of the brush made Azriel tingle all over.

Most comments were very nice; telling her that she helped them sleep, or wanting her to say hello to them. People asked her about her favorite color and if she had any pets (lilac and no). One person asked her to do something called hand sounds, and Azriel had never in his life appreciated hands rubbing together as much as he did at that very moment. Maybe it was something with the setting on her microphone, but the sound was like a wave of pleasure in his brain.

He could feel himself relax. But then, of course, the nasty comments started.

HybernCoolKid Show a little skin babyyyy. Those tits look perky af

MortalGraysen Trying to look so innocent when you’re a fucking slut

Amarantha_utm I would honestly rather watch paint dry

Azriel could feel his blood boil. He recognized the names from the video he had watched last night. Why didn’t she just block them? On the screen, he could tell that Flower Girl had seen the messages; her face fell for just a second. And one second was all it took for Azriel to suddenly feel very protective. He was just about to go tell them to go fuck themselves when he saw that he wasn’t the only one with that idea. The comment section was flooded with love for her and in just a matter of moments, the mean comments were drowned in a sea of heart emojis. Flower Girl smiled at the screen, silently thanking all of her followers for the love. But she didn’t address the hate. She just kept going as if nothing had happened. There were a few more nasty comments during the livestream, but the same thing happened every time; her followers love-bombed her. Azriel was happy to see that most people seemed decent enough, but god, she really needed to learn how to block people.

Before he could think about it, he clicked the link in her description that led to her Instagram. Her username was the same on that app, and it was mainly used to tell her followers when a new video was uploaded. Azriel quickly looked at his own feed, making sure that there was nothing embarrassing. There wasn’t. He didn’t post very often, and when he did he usually posted pictures of food.

He clicked the button for her DMs, and before he could talk himself out of it, he wrote her a message.

Shadowsinger Hey! I just watched your livestream (it was great!) but I couldn’t help but notice some really rude comments. I hope you don’t find this weird, but have you tried blocking them? If you don’t know how, I could send you a link that will describe how to do it. God, this is weird, isn’t it? If this message makes you uncomfortable, just delete it. I’m sorry. But if you need help with blocking those douchebags, please tell me.

He sent it without even reading it and as soon as it was out in cyberspace, he groaned. What the fuck was he doing? She wasn’t his friend. She wasn’t his anything. Yet, there was something that drew him to her. Maybe it was the fact that she helped him sleep? Yes, that had to be it. It was either that or witchcraft, and Azriel didn’t believe in the occult.

Azriel was just about to put his phone in another room and go die from embarrassment when he saw that she had answered his DM. He was afraid to open it. What if she told him to fuck off? He would never be able to watch her videos again, and then he would never again feel rested.

FlowerGirlAsmr Hello! I recognized your username from one of my videos! I’m happy that you enjoyed the livestream :) I have blocked them multiple times, but they keep coming back. But thank you for offering to help me. That is very sweet! Ps: The lasagna on your feed looks delicious.

Azriel stared at the message dumbfounded. She had answered him. And she didn’t tell him to fuck off. She had remembered his username. And she thought that his food looked delicious. He didn’t understand why he suddenly felt so nervous. Should he tell her that after watching her video he had the best night’s sleep of his life?

Probably not. That might sound creepy.

Shadowsinger Yeah, I commented last night. Have you tried blocking words from appearing in your comments? If you did that, you might not have to endure such nasty comments. (Yes, the lasagna was very delicious)

He was staring at his message. Did he sound stupid?

Yeah, he definitely sounded stupid. The lasagna was very delicious ? Why did he add that?

Stupid, stupid, stupid

But despite his stupidity, she answered.

FlowerGirlASMR You can do that?? I had no idea! I am not very good at computers. Honestly, I have to google every single thing about YouTube because I understand nothing, haha. How do I block words?

Shadowsinger I’ll send you a link that describes the process!

He sent her the link and waited for a few minutes, feeling happy to help her.

FlowerGirlASMR I hope you don’t think I’m stupid, but I understood absolutely nothing :( Is there a link for dummies?

Azriel laughed at the last part of her message.

Shadowsinger Unfortunately not. But if you want, I could help you.

She didn’t answer him for a while after that. Azriel was staring at his phone, trying to will a message to appear. Did he cross a line?

FlowerGirlASMR I won’t give you the details to my account. We don’t know each other.

Oh god. She thought that he was trying to scam her or something. Fuck.

Shadowsinger I don’t need to log into your account.

He sent the message quickly.

Shadowsinger I could guide you if you like? I work in IT so I’m used to just guiding people through these things.

FlowerGirlASMR How could we do that? I’m not very good at understanding instructions when they are written…

Azriel had an idea and it was both brilliant and idiotic. He typed quickly before the logical part of his brain told him to stop helping this girl he didn’t know.

Shadowsinger I could give you my number and guide you through the phone? I could share my screen with you so you could follow along like that if you are more of a visual learner. You could call me with a hidden number.

He added the last sentence to make her feel safer. And because he didn’t trust himself to have access to her number.

Again, he had to wait for a small eternity before her message popped up.

FlowerGirlASMR That would be great! Could I call you tomorrow at 10.00?

He didn’t even check his schedule before typing “Yes.”

She answered with a smiley.

Azriel sent her his number and she said that she would call, and that was that.

“What the fuck am I doing?” Azriel muttered to himself and got back to bed.

He opened the youtube app, and one of her videos was the first one he saw. His finger hovered above the video. Would it be weird to watch her now that they had messaged each other? He decided to click another ASMR video instead. And then another. And then another.

After 2 hours, he realized that all ASMR was not equal.

So he gave in and clicked on one of her videos. Flower Girl ASMR’s face filled his screen. “Hello my lovelies, lovelies, lovelies,” she whispered, and Azriel thought that she was the loveliest person he had ever seen.

Five minutes later, he was fast asleep.

#elriel fanfic #azriel x elain #elriel #elain archeron #azriel #acotar #acotar fanfiction

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halloweenhoneylover · 4 years

Text

the struggle bus

summary: spencer is the kindest human alive, which makes things tough for the reader :/ (spencer reid x fem!reader)

word count: 5.3k (a doozy kinda!)

warnings: i guess angst, but really just idiots in love (my fav trope). reader is kind of a hot mess. also, mention of overdose via multivitamin.

author’s note: hi, it’s been approx 4000 years since i last posted, but it’s just because i have no concept of ‘efficiency’ or ‘speed.’ but it’s okay. some of this is good, some of this is eh, make of that what you will. also, this is supposed to be #funny sometimes so uhhhh, keep that in mind. ALSO, the title is majorly stupid, but it was the title of the google doc, and i couldn’t think of anything else......anyways, love u!

For once, the bullpen was quiet.

Spencer was immersed in some case file, doing some work that you should have probably been doing as well, but it was approaching the late hours of the night, and you would barely be able to keep your eyes open if you came even close to trying to read or write. Your desks were situated against each other, so you shifted your gaze across the small divider to him. His sharp features were softened in the lamplight, a sight that tugged on your heartstrings, and you took a moment to just look at him. Most everyone else was gone or was too focused on getting their work done to pay attention to your reverie. Derek, if he were here, would dub you as ‘lovesick’ and shoot mischievous smirks and wiggling eyebrows in your direction, but luckily for you, he was not. Twisting carelessly in your chair with your feet propped on the desk, you chewed absentmindedly on a pen, lost deep in thought. “Hey, Spencer?”

“Yeah?” He continued scribbling on the file without so much as a glance towards you, but that was perfectly fine by you, more time for not-creepy staring.

“How many of my vitamins do you think I could eat before I died?”

At this, he furrowed his brow and neatly laid his pen down.

“That depends on what vitamin you’re taking. If you’re talking about iron supplements, the limit is somewhere around 20mg of elemental iron per kilogram of body weight. Any more than that will have incredibly unpleasant side effects like abdominal pain, persistent vomiting, rapid breathing, and coma. However, if you’re talking about Vitamin C, it’s virtually impossible to overdose, but you might get a bad headache if you supersede 2000 mg.”

“Okay, what about my gummy vitamins?”

He narrowed his eyes at you. “While it still depends on what vitamins are included, eating a whole bottle of your typical multivitamin could easily result in death.”

You mulled this over. “So, I should definitely not go home and eat the rest of my gummy vitamins tonight?”

Spencer chuckled, “I’m not a medical doctor, but yes, I’d recommend that you don’t do that.”

Tossing your head back and letting out a small groan, you protested, “But Spencer, my gummy vitamins taste so good! And I have no food at home, so I guess I either die by overdose on gummy multivitamins or starvation.”

He couldn’t help but grin at your melodrama. It could be 12:06 in the morning, and you could still somehow make him laugh. He was starting to understand that he was in too deep, but he also had the startling realization that he didn’t mind drowning if it was in you.

“You’ve got quite the predicament on your hands there, (Y/N). Maybe you should go grocery shopping with me the next time I suggest it, so you don’t end up in this situation again.”

“Oh my god, dude!” you moaned. “I told you I was actually busy; I had to take Oscar to the vet for his vaccines! I try to be a good mother to my dog, and you know I’m not an anti-vaxxer. I’d never decline time with my favorite guy without a good reason.”

Spencer’s heart was doing somersaults at the thought of him being your favorite guy. He’d won plenty of awards and medals in his lifetime, but somehow, none of those measured up to the accomplishment of being your favorite. Pride and butterflies boiled in his stomach.

“Alright, fine, I’ll let it slide this time.”

You snorted, “I appreciate your unmatched benevolence, Dr. Reid.” Locking eyes with him, you tried to dampen the lava flow of heat in your chest that erupted when he looked at you with the softest expression you’d ever seen, but you failed miserably. You had to clear your throat and look away; it was becoming all too much. “Hey, I’m gonna run to the restroom. Don’t leave without me!”

As you dashed away, a thought crossed Spencer’s mind, and he stood up and set off down the opposite hallway.

You returned a few minutes later to an empty bullpen which made you frown, and your heart sank. You had thought he was going to wait, but guess not. Sighing, you tried to not let it sting too badly when you noticed a light on in JJ’s office. You knocked and pushed the already ajar door with a quick hello? before being met with an exhausted-looking JJ.

“Hey, (Y/N). I thought everyone had left by now.”

“Nope, not quite yet,” you replied, offering a weak smile. JJ noticed and wrote it off as fatigue. “You didn’t happen to see Spencer leave a couple minutes ago, did you?”

“Uh, no, I thought he’d gone too.”

“Hm, okay, thanks anyway!”

You prepared to leave, but she stopped you, cocking her head. “Why do you ask? Is he still here?”

Leaning your head against the doorframe, you sighed. “I’m not sure. He was here when I went to the bathroom, but he wasn’t at his desk when I came back. I’m a little disappointed. We always walk out together because we’re both afraid of the parking garage at night.”

A grin simmered on JJ’s face at that fact. “Well, I could walk you out if you’d like?”

“Nah, that’s okay; I don’t want to bother you.”

There was something behind JJ’s eyes you couldn’t identify as she replied, “Alright, then. Just let me know if you change your mind.” She definitely wasn’t thinking about how you didn’t want her intruding on a you-and-Spencer tradition. Not that she minded! She’d been rooting for you both since the minute you’d stepped into the BAU, and Spencer had looked like he was about ready to melt into the floor at the sight of such a pretty girl.

“Thanks, Jayje.”

Dragging your feet a little, you made your way back to your desk to gather your things, trying to fend off the disappointment. You had gotten your jacket on and were about to pick up your bag when you heard a (Y/N)! from down the hall. Well, that was certainly not JJ. Hesitantly, you called out, “Spencer?”

He finally emerged with his arms loaded with...something, you couldn’t discern what in the dim light. His face lit up like the Vegas strip when he saw you. “(Y/N)! I didn’t want you starving or eating all of your vitamins, so I went down to the vending machine and got you a couple snacks!” Arriving at his desk, he dropped the various bags and packets on his desk, and your eyes widened immensely.

“A couple? Dude, did you buy out the whole machine?”

Slightly breathless from his quick jog back, he waved a dismissive hand. “It was nothing. And hey, look!” He picked up a bag. “Fruit snacks! Just like your vitamins, but without the part where you get really sick.”

You were astonished, to say the least. And minorly speechless too, as evidenced by your mouth that was gaping like a fish. “Spencer...this is so nice. You really didn’t have to.”

“Don’t worry about it; I’m sure you would’ve done the same for me.”

At that, your face nearly split in two, and he mirrored your grin. You thought you might pass out at his kindness, and you knew you’d be thinking about this every day for the next two weeks at least. Your expression then turned mischievous, as you tried to tamp down all of the warmth bubbling in your stomach. “Do you want to help me try to fit all this in my bag?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

———

Garcia had been practicing her ukulele peacefully when she got the call. (Well, ‘peacefully’ might have been a stretch as she had threatened to smash the object on her coffee table when she simply could not get the finger picking pattern she’d practiced for what seemed like hours, but it was supposed to be a relaxing hobby, so yes, it was peaceful.) Huffing a sigh of relief when the caller ID said [(Y/N/N)!!] with the longest stream of heart emojis and not [hotch >:( ], she picked up with her usual air of cheer. “What can I do ya for, my loveliest, most bewitching—”

She was cut off abruptly by the sounds of your horrible, heart-wrenching sobs, and her brows furrowed in concern. “Oh no, my sweet! What’s wrong?” She had to wait a few moments for your tears to calm (somewhat) while you tried to wrangle in your breath, so you could form some sort of sentence.

“Penny!”—gasp—“Oh my God,”—hiccup—“it looks so bad!” With your last word, you tumbled into incoherent bawling once again.

“Dear, what looks so bad?” She held her phone between her ear and her shoulder as she began to gather up her things. Whatever was wrong, it was clear you needed some good, old-fashioned Garcia TLC, and she was ready to give it.

The sniffling subsided minorly, and you choked out, “Remember when we were talking the other day, and I mentioned that my hair had gotten a little too long for my liking?” Oh no, Garcia could see where this was going. “Well, I figured I’d spend our evening off getting my hair cut, and I went to that new hairdresser, and oh Penelope, it looks awful. I don’t think I can ever go out in public again.” With that, your tears resumed.

“Darling, you know I’ve been where you are, and I know it seems bad right now, but everything will be fine. Let me grab my scissors and I’ll be over faster than you can say, ‘Penny, I love you so much, you truly are my fairy godmother.’”

You paused before whispering into the phone, “Penelope, I do love you so much, and you are my fairy godmother. But please, hurry.”

And hurry, she did.

Garcia was knocking on your door a little over five minutes later, which was incredibly suspicious because she lived at least 10 minutes away on a good day, but in the state of your disarray, you were not inclined to care. She sat you down on the toilet in your bathroom, whipping out her hair care set (she had definitely spent a significant amount of time dabbling in cosmetology, and it was desperate times like this when it came in handy). Squeezing your eyes shut through most of it, she snipped here and there, trying to make the best of this...horribly atrocious cut (seriously, that hairdresser should be sued), and when she was finished, it was not as bad as when they started, but it still wasn’t great. The rest of the evening was spent watching cheesy rom-coms and baking in an attempt to get your mind off of your hair.

Everything was mostly fine until the next morning, when you realized you’d have to go into work like this, and as terrifying as that prospect was in a normal work environment, you also worked in a place with an abnormal amount of hot people. (And you happened to be developing feelings for one of those hot people, but your brain was insistent upon ignoring that for the time being.)

Already anticipating your worries, Penelope had sent a text without your knowledge to a BAU group chat that excluded you (she had one of these for every member, it just made surprise birthday party planning so much easier).

[penelope :)] please DO NOT MENTION (Y/N)’S HAIR!!!! she got a bad haircut and she feels really terrible about it and doesn’t want to think about it so do not talk about it!!!

[jennifer!] Oh, no! :( Lips are sealed!

[rossi ;)] rip.

Emerging from the elevator in the nicest work outfit you own (an attempt to distract from the monstrosity), you scurried to Garcia’s lair before anyone could see you. Once inside, you slammed the door shut, and leaning against it, you slid down and covered your face with the files in your hands. “Pennyyyyy,” you moaned. “I don’t think I can do this!”

She swiveled to face you with a look of empathy. “Sugar, I know you can. It—it doesn’t even look that bad!” But Garcia was a horrible liar, and if looks could kill, she would have been dead instantaneously.

Heaving yourself up off the floor, you came to sit in the seat next to her. “Can’t I just work in here today? And maybe for the rest of time?”

“You know I would love that, but those other lovely people on our team need you! Especially the young doctor, you know he’d be lonely without you.”

As if her mention had summoned him, Reid opened the door to their secret meeting, files in hand, and your eyes nearly jumped out of their sockets. Garcia stared at him very intensely, attempting to telepathically tell him to not mention the hair, and you looked like a deer in the headlights, trying to figure out a way to hide yourself from him and possibly the entire universe. And poor Reid shifted his gaze between the two of you, helplessly confused as to what he had walked into. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Uh, no!” Garcia said in the least convincing manner.

“Okay,” he responded, not convinced in the slightest. “I just came to give you some files from Hotch.” So, he handed Garcia the papers and then turned to leave when you caught his eye.

And because he was not the greatest with technology, Spencer had not checked his phone that morning…. Meaning he had not seen Garcia’s text. So he looked at you a moment and cocked his head. “Your hair looks really nice today, (Y/N). Did you get it cut?”

This time, it was Garcia’s turn to glare (because read your texts, dammit!), and you fumbled for a response. As you scanned his face, searching for a sign that he was lying, that he was just saying something to make you feel better, you came up empty. He was telling the truth. He genuinely thought your hair looked nice. “Um, uh—yeah. Yeah, I did. Thanks for noticing.”

“You’re welcome.” He offered you a smile, which you returned easily (a fact that surprised you). “See you.” Retreating from the office because the vibes in there were weird, he shut the door, finally leaving you and Garcia alone again.

You were reeling.

You thought about when you had gotten dressed that morning, and you had entertained each outfit with great scrutiny, trying to come up with something that might draw attention away from your hair. In that half hour you’d spent, you had realized that you didn’t really mind looking bad in front of Morgan or Emily or Hotch or really anyone on the team. Almost anyone. With an increasing amount of discomfort, you had realized you didn't want to look bad in front of Spencer. Of course, he’d never judge you, but you wanted to look good for him. For your best friend.

And he told you your hair looked nice.

You smiled to yourself.

Garcia turned to you with a look of shock on her face. Had that been anyone else, she was sure you would have curled up in a ball beneath her desk and would not have left until every single other person had left the Federal Bureau of Investigation, but you hadn’t, and she smirked.

Oh, she knew where this was going.

———

To put it lightly, it had not been the best of mornings.

It seemed that everything that could’ve gone wrong did, so you burst past the glass doors of the BAU six minutes late with a coffee-covered shirt, mud-stained pants, soggy shoes, and a most miserable attitude. Hotch, while a sympathetic man, was still your boss with rules to follow and when you stumbled into the bullpen, gave a pointed stare between you and the clock, and you nodded sullenly. You understood his silent admonition, but knowing that he was even slightly disappointed in you, made your knees want to buckle. Swallowing around the slug in your throat, you set your bag down beside your chair and noticed a foreign object sitting on your desk. Interest thoroughly piqued, you reached forward to find it was a book with a satin ribbon tied on it.

It truly was a beautiful book with a deep crimson hardcover and the kind of deckled edges that you loved. Running your fingers along the rough-hewn pages, you finally noted the title, and you gasped. Beloved by Toni Morrison. Your favorite. The cursive words curved in black on the cover to match the ribbon, and you carefully traced the curling letters, wondering where this gorgeous book could have come from.

In the desk across from yours, Spencer watched the scene in front of him with a grin. He couldn’t help but feel pleased at the look of awe on your face as you inspected the book with careful fingers and a gentle gaze, and his heart swelled more and more the longer he looked. “Did you know that Margaret Garner, the woman the character Sethe is based on, her trial was used as part of an effort to dismantle the Fugitive Slave Act?” Your eyes flickered up to meet his, and those stupid freaking butterflies erupted in the pit of your stomach as you realized who had gifted you the book. “The presiding judge didn’t accept her lawyer’s argument that the act violated the right to religious freedom, but it was still somewhat of a turning point in the movement to strike down the law.”

“I did not know that, but thank you. For the fact and the book.”

“You’re welcome.” He had to avert his eyes from your strong gaze because he thought he might melt otherwise.

“Please don’t misinterpret this as me being ungrateful because I’m so, so thankful, but why?”

He shrugged, “I was just in the book store, and it made me think of you.” No, he didn’t keep an eye out specifically for this book on his weekly trip to the bookstore by his apartment after you had briefly mentioned your love of Ms. Morrison’s metaphors. And he definitely didn’t ask the owner Alice if she would let him know if she ever got any new copies.

Frankly, you were at a loss for words. Combing back through your conversations with him, you tried to remember when you had talked about the book, but you couldn’t come up with anything other than a couple words tossed briefly here and there. Suppose it wasn’t really the fact that he had heard, but the fact that he had listened. He listened and remembered things about you, little things tucked in the back of his brain, and it was how he thought about you even when you weren’t around. So, you clutched the book to your chest tightly as if it could meld with your heart and let your thoughts rage with the implications for a minute before smothering your mushy grin and tucking the book into your bag.

(Later, you pulled it out on your ride home on the metro. Spencer had already gotten off at his stop a few minutes before, so you took this moment of solitude to revel in the glory of your new gift. Every time you smoothed a hand over the cover, your mind was overwhelmed with what-ifs. What if he felt the same? What if his stomach rumbled with the same butterflies when you looked at him? What if this means he likes you as more than…. And abruptly, you were doused in doubt once again, muzzling those dangerous, rearing hypotheticals. This was a path that would only lead to disappointment.

Those thoughts only got worse when you read his inscription, though:

Dear (Y/N/N),

I hope you find great joy in reacquainting yourself with the graces of Ms. Morrison’s elegant prose in this new copy. I was inspired by your praise and read this classic again, and I can say that I definitely understand your veneration of her story-telling. Hopefully, we can discuss it soon, so I can try to see all of the details that you so admire. You are always much better at appreciating the finer things in life.

She says that, “something that is loved is never lost.”

I hope you know that you will never be lost to me.

Sincerely,

Spencer

(P.S. I wrote this in pencil, so you can erase and have the clean copy you wanted.)

You would never erase it.)

———

“Hey, are you alright?”

You sat at your desk with your head in your hands. Your responding “no” came out muffled.

Spencer frowned and sat on the edge of your desk. “Is there anything I can help with?”

Running your hands over your face, you finally met his gaze. His eyes were soft as they searched your own, and the expression on his face was not of pity or frustration but empathy, and of course, he was just being his sweet self. Your eyes watered in response, and his heart clenched at the sight. You shifted your eyes somewhere else, anywhere else. “Uh, no.”

It was clearly a lie.

Furrowing his brows at your obfuscation, he scanned your face for any indication of what might be the problem. A small sigh. He came up with nothing. “Alright,” he conceded hesitantly. “May I ask what is wrong?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

You stared down at the files neatly ordered on your desk, trying to mentally shoo him away with the sheer force of your willpower alone. But Spencer Reid was a stubborn man, and you knew this, and you also knew he wasn’t leaving until he knew you were alright. So, you both sat in the silence of the bullpen that only accompanied the arrival of midnight. The glow of your lamp bathed the vicinity in a warm yellow, and the tick of the nearby clock rattled around your chest as you attempted fruitlessly to subdue your incessant thoughts. He was close enough that you could hear the soft susurration of his exhales as his eyes flitted about the room to give you some sort of breathing room, and you shut yours for a moment to appreciate this moment of peace before the inevitable catastrophe to follow.

“I’m—uh, not okay.”

Finally turning back to you with a mildly surprised expression (he didn’t expect you to say anything so soon. Or so bluntly.), he offered you one of his signature tight-lipped smiles as encouragement to continue.

“I’m kind of really struggling…” you trailed off, gaze empty, ensnared in your thoughts.

Ever the gentleman with persistence that could last a thousand years, he gently prompted, “With…?”

A strong gulp and eyes squeezed shut. “With you.”

Well, that was not the answer Spencer was expecting. He felt like he’d had the wind knocked out of him, and he was hollow and shaken and in pain. Gaping, he fumbled hopelessly for an answer, trying to find some reason you could be upset with him. He had always thought you two were the best of friends; he’d never doubted that before. How could he have missed this?

Swallowing hard against the lump in his throat, he strained to ask, “Uh—um, what—what did I do?”

Upon witnessing his struggle, you quickly amended your previous statement. “No, no, no, no, no! I’m not mad at you, well, I kind of am, but you don’t need to feel bad, it’s not your fault.”

“I’m not really sure what to make of that.”

You huffed a sigh and covered your face with your hands in a poor attempt to try to hide the blush rapidly coloring your cheeks. “I’m sorry, I just—you’re so nice!”

Now Spencer was really confused. “You’re mad at me...because you think I’m nice?”

“Yes, Spencer! You’re so nice, and it makes me incredibly frustrated. You see this?” You picked up a book from your desk and waved it frantically. A little intimidated by your crazed look, he nodded timidly. “Do you recognize this book?”

“It’s a special edition of Beloved by Toni Morrison.”

“It’s the special edition of my favorite book that you bought for me because you know how much I love this book.”

Spencer looked like a deer in the headlights. “You always said that your book at home was so messy with your annotations and that a fresh copy would have been nice.”

“You didn’t even buy it for my birthday or a special occasion! You just saw it in the store and said that you thought of me and had to buy it. That’s so unbelievably thoughtful! Not to mention the fact that I can barely look at fruit snacks now without tearing up. And—and the other day! When I got my haircut, I hated it, but I came in the next day, and you were the first person to tell me you liked it. You weren’t even lying to make me feel better; I’m a profiler, and I know that you were telling the truth. And it took no effort or thought because Spencer, you are the most kind-hearted and compassionate and generous person I’ve ever met. You are so—so genuinely good.

“No, you are the best. You are the best person I know,” you stated with finality, holding his stare with an unshakeable firmness. It was the first time you truly looked at him all night, and his heart felt like it was going to expand past his ribcage and burst open like a balloon. Your resolve melted though and your voice dropped to a near whisper. “And you’re not just nice. You’re nice to me. Which just makes it so hard.”

You deflated, withering into your seat.

“Makes what hard?”

“It makes it so much harder for me to not fall in love with you.”

Stunned silence.

Until it was shattered by a hiccup, and Spencer finally noticed the tears leaking from the corner of your eyes, and he tried, he tried so hard to puzzle through all of this new information and the fact that you just admitted you’re falling in love with him, and for some reason, you’re crying? He couldn’t even get his stupid genius brain to come with a single word before you started stumbling into an apology. “I know that’s not what you want to hear because we’re supposed to be friends, and I know that you’re just a good person, so you’re nice to everyone. Believe me, I know. And I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable, but I couldn’t keep holding on to this by myself, and I knew if anyone would let me down easy, it’d be you.” You chewed on your lip and avoided his stare at all costs. “So, I’m sorry.” You sniffled.

The quiet that followed weighed heavy on your chest, and you couldn’t seem to breathe. You had expected rejection; you hadn’t expected complete silence. And this was somehow so much more unbearable. In a voice so faint you weren’t even sure if he could hear, you begged, “Please say something.”

A beat.

“(Y/N), I love you.”

A whisper just barely verging on hopeful, “What?”

“(Y/N), I—I love you so much.” His heart felt like it was in his throat, and his voice broke slightly as he stood. “You’re the first person I think about when I get up in the morning, and you’re the last person before I fall asleep. I dread going home at the end of the day because you’re not there. When you’re not with me, even if you’re in the other room, it feels like I’ve forgotten something, and for the longest time, I couldn’t figure out what I was missing, but it was you. You consume my every thought, which is saying something because I think a lot. Actually, it’s kind of funny,” he chuckled somewhat morosely, “I truly cannot comprehend the fact that you don’t know how much I’ve liked you, how long I’ve loved you because it feels like it’s so obvious and so potent that it seeps out of me, whether I want it to or not.

“And I’m nice to you because no one else is more deserving of kindness. I’d be lucky if you let me be the one to remind you of that, everyday. Because you’re the best person I know.” You looked up at him with shining eyes and the meagerest beginnings of a smile, and he just beamed right back. With a creased brow, he ventured, “You’re my favorite person in the world, you know that, right?

Failing to suppress your growing grin, you nodded your head meekly. “Yeah, I know.”

“Good.”

Spencer felt pleased with himself until he remembered that he had forgotten the most important part. “Would you like to get dinner with me sometime? Like a date?”

Standing from your seat, you wrapped your arms around his neck and burrowed your face into his chest, and he immediately reciprocated, clutching you as close as he could. “I would love that.” It came out muffled, but he understood well enough as he pressed his face into your neck. And you stood like that for a few moments, just existing together, and for the first time in a long time, nothing hurt. There was no worry of unrequited yearning or pain of terrible pining; there were just two people who finally knew peace. Knew that the person they loved most in the world loved them back. Neither ever wanted to leave.

However, sometimes necessary duties like breathing take precedence, so you pulled back from him enough to finally claim some air. Your hands slid down his front, resting on his chest, his on your waist, and you just stared at him. The most beautiful face you’d ever seen looking right back at you with the same expression of awe that made you realize just how lucky you were. And slowly, hesitantly, you both leaned in ever so slightly with heads wavering and tension buzzing. Gingerly and sweetly. Neither could commit, but no one could pull away from fast-approaching revelation.

Finally, a breath away.

“Can I kiss you?”

You nodded.

When your lips met, your chest heaved with your eager, romantic hopes and dreams bubbling up near your lungs, finally coming to fruition. His hands came up to caress your jaw, and you leaned into him. His touch was so gentle, but he also touched you with intention. For once in his life, Spencer Reid felt no hesitation, kissing the girl of his dreams. And you felt held by him. You were bursting at the seams of your existence, swollen with infatuation and tenderness, yet totally and completely encompassed by him. You could shatter into a million tiny, little pieces, and he would be there to collect every shard. How cheesy.

Both of you grinned into the kiss; the sickly sweet itch in your heart was contagious. You finally released him, and wanting to savor the moment, you tucked yourself into the crook of his neck, so his chin could rest on the crown of your head. “I love you a lot, Dr. Reid.”

He hummed in agreement.

It didn’t need saying.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid #i hope yall see that the sentences that are syntactically similar and the parallel settings are intentional and are like stupid attempts at #motifs and that im not a stupid person :/#also #lol wtf was that ending #anyways #yo this may or may not be based on problems i be having irl #i just fall in love with anyone who is remotely kind to me #lmao #anyone else desperate for affection?? gang??#also r there any toni stans out there i luv my queen #is anyone out there? i just want friends ahh #ALSO DOES ANYONE ELSE HAVE THE OVERWHELMING URGE TO DEVOUR THEIR GUMMY VITAMINS????? IS THAT JUST ME????

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hyucksong · 4 years

Text

nct dream as roommates

a/n: *romantically calls you bro*

lee mark

the roommate that walked in on you taking a shower on the first night you moved in and avoided you for a week afterward

he even went as far as browsing different apartments to live in because baby boy was too afraid to face you

sometimes wakes up before you and he always prepares your coffee or tea and sets it by your bed for you when you wake up…sometimes sits on the edge of your bed to watch you

asks you to do his laundry because he doesn’t know how to separate the colors

you’re fine with doing them because he tries his absolute bestest with everything else, and it’s so cute

the first time he did the laundry you were sick…and you got a whole new wardrobe of pink clothing the next day

always does the dishes and you do the laundry…he’ll clean the living room and kitchen if you clean the bathrooms…he’ll go grocery shopping…only if you go with him

asks you to do his hair when he meets up with his friends, and if you say no he says “okay” and then pouts until you agree

you really like photography but hiring models is expensive so you always ask mark to model for you

and he always agrees, blushing while doing so

make-up artists are expensive too, so you also get him dressed up and add whatever you want to his face

(once you did a fairy photoshoot and he had freckles and pink cheeks and your heart did the thing)

this time you need him to sit still for hours because it's supposedly a big photoshoot with a few other photographers coming too, so there’s a lot of looks to get through

you do the first look before you get to the photo site to save time

he thinks nothing of you curling his hair until he looks up at you and time slows as his heart stops…

because you smell like vanilla and your nose is scrunched in concentration…because your breathing is heavy as you run to the bathroom to get more things before you’re late…

because you’re biting your lip while looking at him, admiring your own work, proud of the way the make-up came out, but a little disheartened because it looked like you put a little too much blush (even though you only put a little)

and mark thinks,,, oh no

fuck

huang renjun

your best friend since you were a child

you’re used to ‘living with him’ because you practically lived with him as a kid; you were always at his house spending the night or vice versa

he wakes you up an hour after he gets up because ‘he needs his peaceful time’

claims that ‘you’re the worst person to live with’ but refuses to look for another apartment because ‘no one else can handle you but me’

(in reality, he knows that there will never be anyone else he’ss comfortable with as you)

he wakes you up by throwing a pillow in your face and or flopping on your bed next to you and bouncing a few times

once got really scared because you weren’t waking up no matter what he did, and when he started to tear up you opened your eyes and pushed him off the bed

you just didn’t want to be woken up that day and tried to ignore him, but apparently, you ignored him for too long because he genuinely freaking out on the inside

he’s watched ‘what’s eating gilbert grape’ okay he was SCARED

he didn’t talk to you for three days after that....only started to wake you up again because you made the effort to wake up before him and make him breakfast in bed with hot tea

he expected you to leave his room after you gave it to him, but you just looked at him for a minute before sitting on the bed next to him, getting under the covers with him

he focused on the fact you were taking up all the space instead of the now-familiar thrum of his heartbreak against his ribcage

(he’s felt it for the past fewyears, he’s gotten used to drowning it out)

“y/nnnnnnn what are you doingggggg”

“shut up i made the breakfast, can’t i at least sit next to my favorite boy?”

...he’s your favorite boy?...okaythatwasreallycutebuthe’llneveradmitit

“o...kay...”

blushes when you lay your head on his shoulder in bed, watching whatever he’s doing on his phone, because your cheek is warm against his shirt and its bleeding through onto his skin and weiowioegfhowieh

but also yells at you when you take a bite of his toast and bolt out of the room, giggling

“yAH y/N”

lee jeno

the roommate that was awkward for the first month because he didn’t really want to room with a girl because then he can’t spend saturday with the boys

then he brought them home one day without telling you and was expected to get his ass Whopped but you were drinking vodka and crying while watching Cars so

yeah you were the perfect roommate for him

you drink together

saturday may be for the boys but sunday is for drinking your problems away with your roommate

can’t cook but will make BOMB desserts for you both every friday...also fridays are pizza nights and you both order a large cheese pizza with ranch on the side and a pint of dr.pepper

yall have the same diet but he has a six-pack and you don’t so you call bullshit on health and everything it is

both of you fall asleep on the couch all the time, TV still playing the game soundtrack with the controllers on the floor, blinking from low battery

jeno alwayswakes up before you, and he doesn’t admit it, but he loves to watch you sleep

you just look so...ethereal

even with the drool

ANYWAY

you are one of the bros...he’s even taken a shit when you took a shower before -- that’s how close you are

then one day you get dressed up real pretty and he’s making fun of you, laughing “you never look this nice who’s holding you at gunpoint”

“i’m going on a date jeno hop off my DICK”

“,,,what”

immediately felt defensive and was questioing who could like you and why you were going on a saturday night when it was busy on the streets and also please call the guy and cancel the date because he wants to watch toy story with you and eat pasta why are you going out with someone has he met him why haven’t you told jeno about this guy you know what you should just not go

and it’s when you walk out the door rolling your eyes, promising to be back home before 9pm with a cute shirt on and nice perfume on when jeno realizes

that damn he hates to see you leave,,,but he loves to watch you go

(and he might have the teeniest, weeniest crush on you)

lee donghyuck

the type to never clean the dishes and always makes you do them even if he cooks because he hates the feeling of wet food

then one day he sees you v e r y stressed over school work and he just...cleans the whole house

you come back from the library and you’re like,,,the fuck where’s haechan and what have you done with him

in turn, you buy him a headset that he’s been wanting for the past year...and you think he’s about to propose to you after you give them to him

but in all reality he’s just so happy that you even remembered something so trivial...like he talking about them once (1) and you remembered?

...cute bitch

he’s a big prankster, but in an endearing way, so whenever he goes too far you never really stay mad because he’s just a little unaware of the anger his pranks cause

plus you always get back at him

always :)

you both are basically the same people; you’re passionate about your studies and he’s passionate about gaming and dancing

yall are the bad bitches that no one messes with

BET that yall wear matching fits whenever you two go out together

you get together to watch his favorite youtubers do let’s plays of popular games

one day yall sit down to watch some outlast 2

and boy

did you underestimate the scare factor

so now you’re three episodes deep into the let’s play and your head is buried in haechans stomach because you’re laying down facing away from the TV, clinging to the poor boy

he doesn’t know if his heart is beating so fast because of the jumpscare or because of the way you look up at him when you ask if the scary part is over yet

he doesn’t like seeing you scared with tears in your eyes...but the way you’re clinging to him makes him want to watch a thousand more scary episodes...

...if it means you’ll cuddle with him

na jaemin

the best roommate you could ever ask for

he loves to clean and cook, not to mention he’s an absolute sweetheart!!!!!!!

you started to live with him because you had posted an ad on a website for a roommate and he sent back a reply

but the texts used so many of (=｀ω´=) these emojis you just assumed it was a girl

he was not

every night before you go to bed, he’ll walk into your room and whisper “good night, sleep well” to you before petting you head and walking out

people always wonder if you’re dating, but you always reply that it’s just the way he is

until one night you invite your (asshole) project partner to your apartment and she flirts with him endLESSLY,,, not doing her work or anything, just talking with jaems

like it’s pissing you off, and you think it’s pissing him off, and you’re about to send her home when you notice the storm outside and you realize,,,, you’re too good of a person to do that

so she sleeps on the couch, and you do the same, just so you can keep an eye on her and so that she isn’t left alone with jaemin at any point (poor boy looked like he’s about to combust if she tries to talk to him again)

and jaemin does his usual routine even with the extra company, stroking your head and even going as far as to place a kiss on your forehead

“what about me, do I get a kiss” the girl annoyingly asked

“no, you’re not yn” and hE WALKS AWAY AND CLOSES THE DOOR TO HIS ROOM

there’s silence in your head as you process his words, a little shocked and confused as to what he means, but most of all, your thoughts consist of;

oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit

you might have just fallen for him (let’s face it, you’ve been in love with him (just not as long as he’d been in love with you))

zhong chenle

not going to lie, you two did NOT get along in the beginning

you were each other’s first roommates, and you knew he was extroverted, but you underestimated the differences between your personalities

like,,, no please don’t invite the dreamies over again for the eighth time this week I can’t focus on homework with all the screaming

but even with all the head-butting, the chores are split evenly because he’s practicing to ‘be marriage material for his future wife’

you don’t care as long as he just does what he’s supposed to, and you two aren’t exactly the closest

but there are times when you connect, like on lazy Sunday afternoons where you both just relax on the couch...anywaY

and he always rolls his eyes, telling you that ‘you need to stop being a hermit and make some friends’

‘get some confidence’

‘why don’t you put any effort into how you dress’

it hurts a little...you know you’re not the prettiest and you don’t really try anyway

but to have it pointed out to you just...stings

and after a guy rejects you (after you built up courage for a whole years to confess to him) your confidence is at an all-time low (he said no because ‘you were too bland’ like wtf fUCk you)

and you’re just crying and eating spaghetti o’s, telling chenle as oon as you walk into the door that you’re ‘too sensitive for his bullshit today’

to which chenle doesn’t care... then he sees your puffy eyes and asks wha happens

you tell him, and he just gets...angry

(and jealous?)

he goes on a tangent, mocking the guy, saying that ‘you’re the most doen-to-earth natural beauty’ he’s ever seen and that ‘any guy who doesn’t fall in love with your cute sarcastic personality’ is dumber than a rock

he grumbles for the rest of the night, sitting and watching movies with you; it makes your heart swell that he’s getting so mad for you

and at the end of the mini-movie night, and he strokes your hair saying that you’re ‘his little introvert’,

you decide that ‘opposite attract’ is 100% true

(and chenle notices that you have very pretty lips)

park jisung

you two are dorm roommates at a dance school, and y’all are so cute all the teachers LOVE you

like you both just spend so much time together it’s ridiculous

yall walk to class together, then from class to class together, eat lunch together, after school activities, walk back to the dorms, meet each other’s friends, go out on the weekends together...everything

it feels weird to not be with him

(the teachers have a bet that you’ll be dating before your senior year)

the dorm is just a studio apartment with two bedrooms (your parents both pay a lot for space)

so chores aren’t too hard, in fact, you both usually spend the last few hours of daylight on Sunday nights straightening up your apartment from the hectic week before, to start off completely fresh and new

nothing big ever happens on Sundays around the home, but one day jisung (who went to hang out with chenle (he invited you but you pouted and said you had too much hmwk)) found a little puppy on the side of the road

and then proceeded to sneak into the dorms with it, hiding it under his shirt

when he showed you what he found, you couldn’t be mad...it was just so cute (both jisung’s little smile and the puppy)

but you noticed it was shivering, and you whined, ‘jisung you didn’t even notice it was cold oH My GoD, go get it some water and food’ while you set up a nest of blankets for the little guy

hours later when the puppy had eaten and subsequently fallen asleep in your lap, you turned to jisung

‘let’s name it mousie’

‘what that’s dumb’

‘it’s not dumb! i wanna name it that because it looks like you whenever you sleep! it's so cute hehehe’

you thought jisung was WHAT when he slept

jisung didn’t talk for a whole minute, drinking in your words and thinking about them over and over again, in the meantime you were just smiling down at the puppy

your cheeks were red with happiness and your nose was a little red from sneezing (because the puppy was covered in pollen from being outside) and your gaze was filled with such love that jisung shivered

you let out a sigh and plopped your head on his shoulder, and all his feelings he’d ever had for you exploded in his chest, and he tensed (though if you noticed, you didn’t day anything)

you just kept and petting the dog

and damn did jisung want to be that dog

3K notes · View notes

roseymess · 2 years

Note

Hii! I wanted to join your new ship! I absolutely love love love the idea! How are you so creative😫💪?

My royal aesthetic is like a dark academia aesthetic. Like so:

My favorite emoji is 😫 and the kpop group I would like is BTS! Thank you so much pretty <3

Hey!! Thank you so much for the complement 🥺🥰🥰

In BTS I ship you with....

Jimin

You were one of the princesses. The middle one. Your elder sister,Grace(let's say) was going to be the future Queen. Her groom had already been chosen from the next kingdom. In this kingdom,things go differently. The women are more authoritative and more powerful than men. You all have crown Princess,queens and women as chief royals. And of course,the reverse harem. Your elder sister had many husbands,second man-in,the royal male consort,and many. Your younger sister was quite the heart breaker,fooling around with men from all age.

Then there was you,all alone,in your own world. But still you were famous for your art,your wit and your dresses. Everything you wore would immediately become popular among the women in the. kingdom. Your swordman ship was also praised. And so were your fighting skills. Usually,you went with your sister Grace to a the wars. And won them. Ladies and queens from other Kingdoms wanted to be you. But you didnt care about all the fame. You had the beauty,the art and the skill. For you,longed for one true love. You were never interested in fooling around. You felt you were too shy for those things. You would imagine a man,coming and sweeping you off your feet. Someone whom you could protect,someone who would protect you in return. You wanted a fairy tale.

A royal ball was announced for your younger sister. Your parents were done with her days of fooling around and now wanted her to settle. You were also getting ready. You wore a beautiful black and red dress. Your lips red,your hair in a messy bun. You looked beautiful. Your red tiara dawning on your head. Of course,the theme was peach,pink and white.

You came in with black,red and dark aura. And everyone stopped and looked at you. Of course your sisters were proud of you,once again for not falling for the trend. Your eyes scanned the place. Many handsome men were present. Beautiful ladies as well. You took a wine glass and kept roaming around the place. You weren't in a mood to dance. You just stopped at one corner and drank your glass.

After sometime,as you were looking at your shoes,you heard a soft angelic voice. You looked up. A man,maybe in his kid twenties. Parted blond hair. Fair skin,plump lips, crescent eyes that were smiling, beautiful dimples. "Cute" you thought. But you knew,the man was far from cute. He looked like an angel. He was wearing a white suit. And he looked perfect,so beautiful and pure. "Princess? Are you there?" He asked,you were so lost ,that you didn't realise that he was talking to you. "uh yes,sorry pardon me" you spoke . " Its okay Princess,I asked if it would be okay if I asked your hand for a dance. The ball is almost over and I couldn't help but notice that you were standing here all evening,so if you would like to dance to the last song with me?" He asked, politely. Well,he was handsome,good looking. And he stalked you. So....

" Wow,you dance so well Princes,no one would have had any idea had you been stuck in that corner all evening" Jimin,the man whose name now you know,said. " Well,I never really cared. I liked staying alone. Idk why even i am famous" you said smirking,as if you didn't know. Jimin smiled at your words. He had already found you extremely charming. He had heard about you a lot in his kingdom and today he wanted to see you for himself. And definitely,he did right. You were absolutely the girl he always dreamnt about. Maybe not everyone's ideal but for him. He would often dream about a girl like you,in red, waiting for him. But he knew it's too good to be true. As he must return to his home when the clock strikes 12(gotcha😏🤭). You were the princess,while he could only afford to come here today through the help of the royal guard,who is his brother. He heard stories about you through the letters his brother would send him. And his dream came true.

You two soon left the ball room after the dance. You two were now, strolling in the garden,side by side. You had found the man quite attractive and of course, charming. You wanted to know more about him.

" So what's your dream, Jimin" you asked

" To be a fighter,yk,like a knight in armour" hearing his answer,you smiled.

" Well then,care for a challenge?" You said.

Of course, Jimin knew about your skills. But he had skills too. "Uh sure Princess-" he couldn't complete it but soon the clock striked 11:55 pm. His brother was already at the gate waiting with his castle way back home.

Jimin knew his dream reality is coming to an end. But he wanted it to last.

"Princess,i have loved and enjoyed every moment with you. And I wish I had more time. But i must leave now." He said and have you a bracelet. You saw he was wearing a similar one,just that his had a small lock attached to his one. Yours had a key. " Please keep this ,as a memory of tonight. I would love to dream of tonight for the rest of my life. And keep my lock bracelet as a memento. I must hurry now Princess. Have a good night" he said and soon he disappeared. You tried to chase him but the other ladies there pulled you in their conversation.

Months later.

You still think of that man. And you keep hoping you would see him again. You were now getting ready to train your new batch of armys. You went to the ground. But what shocked you the most was seeing Jimin, the man who had your heart locked to his gaze,there in the batch. He also looked stunned to see you and was expecting you to be mad. But all you did was smile,before you went on to command them. Knowing full well,Jimin would have to stay back for his punishment.

Hope you liked your ship. Sorry I got carried away. Please leave a feedback 🥰🥰🥰

#bts ships #royal au #aesthetic #kpop ships

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hogarthwrites · 3 years

Text

house sitting for two chapter 5

previous chapter

next chapter

pairing: Sam Drake/Reader (m/f)

genre: smut, slow romance

warnings: none

words: 1,040

summary:

With Sam away, you try to keep yourself busy, but your mind kept lingering to him. Elena notices and tells you something the brothers have been dealing with.

note:

song rec: Missing You - John Waite

You felt even emptier when you got back to your own home. Sam hadn't called or texted all day, and you began to worry. You didn't think the flight would get delayed for so long and there wasn't any news about plane crashes. Maybe he was just as tired as you were, you figured.

Still, it didn't stop you from glancing at your phone every now and then. Nothing. You gingerly picked it up, opening your messages with Sam, wondering if you should text him first.

You had no problem texting your friends and asking them if they were fine, but why were you so nervous when it came to Sam?

“I can do this,” you muttered. “I text Elena and Nate all the time.”

Hey, just wanted to check in. Hope you got home safe.

Your finger hovered over the send button, your heart racing in your chest. You closed your eyes and as you lowered your finger, your phone buzzed.

Almost if he was reading your mind miles away, Sam texted you.

Miss me yet?

You instantly grinned, erasing what you wrote to type in something new.

Maybe. I don't know how I'll ever survive without you fucking me to sleep.

Sam sent a laughing emoji and soon your phone started buzzing and his picture showed up on your screen.

“I said I’d call you,” he sounded smug. “How've you been?”

“So you did,” you giggled. “I'm just fine.”

“Um,” he paused. “Listen, thanks for the past few weeks. I do miss you.” He paused again. “Truly.”

“Of course, Sam. I miss you too.”

“Nice,” he sounded relieved. “Nathan called. He wasn't too pleased with me leaving so soon.”

“Yeah. Seemed like he wanted to talk.”

“He did but eh, it's no big deal.”

He fell silent and all you could hear was his breathing. It was hard not seeing him. You couldn't tell how he was feeling at that moment.

“I gotta go,” he suddenly said.

So soon? You pouted to yourself.

“Alright, I’m sure you’re tired from the trip,” you nodded, not that he would’ve seen you.

“Yeah and I’ve got some things to sort out,” he muttered. “Don’t be a stranger.”

“Bye, Sam.”

I wanna see you again , you wanted to tell him. Why didn’t I tell him?

The next few weeks felt like torture. After that brief phone call with Sam, all you got was static silence. You helped Elena decorate Cassie’s new room, going over to the Drake-Fisher home twice a week when you didn’t have to work. You felt like you kept yourself busy enough, but Sam was still in your mind.

It frustrated you that he wasn’t someone who used social media, and all you found on his Facebook was a picture of him on a boat, holding a fish. Typical.

“So,” Elena gave you a look as she hung up little fairy lights. “What’s going on between you and Sam?”

“Nothing,” you looked away, pretending to focus on the color palette Nathan and Elena were discussing just earlier. “I think robin blue is a better choice.”

“Thank you for agreeing,” she nodded, but you knew she wasn’t going to drop the topic. “I can tell when something has happened, you know.”

“Jesus, I forget you’re a journalist,” you muttered. “Okay, I slept with him, but it’s nothing new. We’ve been hooking up way before.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“Anyway,” you cleared your throat. “There's nothing more to it.”

“I’m going to pretend you haven’t been hooking up under my roof,” she said quietly so Nathan wouldn’t hear, and you blushed. “Really? Sam?”

“You make it sound like it’s a bad thing.”

“Oh no, Sam’s great. I love him. It’s just…” She trailed off. “Do you have feelings for him?”

“No,” you mumbled. “Maybe. Shit.”

You sat on the floor and sighed. “I don’t know. It’s not like he feels the same way. You know him.”

“Wow,” Elena sat in front of you.

“Don’t tell Nate, I don’t think I can handle the embarrassment.”

“I’m sure he won’t mind,” she laughed. “Anyway, he’s been so busy dealing with family matters, you dating his brother’s going to be the least of his concerns.”

“Family matters?”

“Sam didn’t tell you?” Her eyes went wide and you weakly shook your head. Sam hasn’t told you much, you wanted to tell her. “Their father contacted them. Tracked them down somehow. Now he’s getting married and it’s caused a rift between the brothers.”

“Oh shit,” you whispered. “I’m sure Sam doesn’t wanna go.”

“Nope,” she shook her head. “But Nate wants to give their dad a chance.”

“That’s heavy.”

Elena made you promise you won’t tell anyone else. It was a hot topic in the household, but it distressed Nathan more than he let on. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how Sam felt.

You wondered if you could bring it up the next time you talked to Sam, whenever that was going to be. Would it be appropriate, you wondered. It’s not like he ever talked to you about anything too personal other than his fake plant and Irene.

Damn that Samuel Drake .

That weekend, you decided to stop waiting around for a call that you knew would never come. You were curled up on the sofa, listening to music while banana bread baked in the oven. You almost felt normal again when your landline began to ring.

You stumbled to your feet, catching the receiver at the third ring.

“Hello?”

“Hey there.” It sounded like Sam.

“Sam?” You pulled the receiver closer to your ear, thinking it would help. “Where have you been?”

“Sorry, sweetheart. Something came up,” he said softly. “I wanted to ask if you can help me with a job? I’ll pay for your tickets and all.”

“What is this about, Sam?”

“Remember that Sotheby’s auction where we pretended to be a couple?”

You remembered. It was the first time you kissed that eventually led to all the hook ups later on.

“Yeah, I remember.”

“It’s something like that. It’s an easy job, I promise.”

“Okay…” You sucked in your cheek. “Sure, I’ll do it.”

“Great,” you could hear the smile in his voice. “I’ll email you everything.”

#sam drake x reader #sam drake smut #sam drake #samuel drake #uncharted fanfiction

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killuaisaprincess · 3 years

Text

Incandescent

The wind bristles against what little of fair skin is shown, marking it red with the gusts of wind, scarf tugged up a little further. Icy blue eyes stuck staring at a bright screen blankly, thumb pressing against the home bottom over and over.

Nothing.

Killua sighs, the exhalation of air shown visibly. His fingers were numb and bright red at this point, the pain ebbing away with each touch. He leans his body forward on the railing looking out at all the brilliant lights of the city against the oranges and pinks of the sky. This was the only nice thing about his family's estate.

Only high-class butlers and actual members of the Zoldyck family are allowed on the roof. It was Killua's only escape as he was too old, eighteen, to ask to hang in the children's room, and too young to drink. Stuffy parties were not his thing. Even if it resulted in a couple more lashings later.

Alluka had giggled and said not to worry, a prince would save him from his evil mother soon... yeah, right.

On cue, his phone dings.

'Kil, come back inside.'

He stares at the screen, dropping his phone to his side, one arm going to rest on the railing.

He could hear his mother's sickeningly sweet voice even through her texts.

Ding!

'You better not keep Mama waiting.'

Yeah, right, Piggy... so what?

What was new...?

His back still stings, Killua's navy-blue sweater rubbing against the welts on his skin.

Killua looks down, the people below mere little specks wandering the streets; he glances at the phone in his hand, wondering if he could chuck it down there, be done with it.

Ding!

Canines grind together, frozen fingers clenching against the cool frozen surface of his phone as he whips it up to his face.

'aunt mito got me a puppy i named him knuckle!!! 🐶'

Gon...

Finally, not some stuffy idiot!

Just purely an idiot. A small smile graces his lips, and Killua actually responds to this one.

'After that weirdo who cries a lot and has like a million dogs?? 🤨'

'yeah!!!!!!!! 🤪 what did you get killua?'

Killua shifts, looking up to the sky, his grin slowly becoming bitter as he harshly slams the pads of his fingers against the screen of his phone.

'Nothing this is my family you are talking about dumbass 😐'

'oh 😮😬 well what do you want 🤔🤗'

'A prince to come save me from this tower.'

Yeah, right. Killua muses, sending it, hoping Gon's dense ass head will get he is being sarcastic. Well, somewhat. Fairy tales aren't real. Even if Killua wants out, he's stuck here.

He waits. And waits. Looking at the screen, time slowly ticking by.

Nothing.

Ding!

'ok!!! 🥸🤪🥴'

Stupid Gon.

What does that combination of emojis even mean? So stupid. Still... it was a small moment of happiness amongst the sadness of the night...

—

Killua is beginning to realize he won't be able to stay out here much longer... His phone was blowing up with texts, and it wouldn't be long before they send a butler to get him. He had been up here for three hours. Each hour a tally to his punishment later, but... it was the one day Killua doesn't care.

Until he hears an odd amount of suspicious grunting and metal scrapping... like someone was trying to break in...

So close to the top of the building, why? Killua walks over cautiously, fingers shaking and clammy; he leans over, and...

A pair of hands grab the railing sending him back and reeling to find a weapon. Blue hues land on his phone. ...Would a phone be a good choice for a weapon?

Slowly the figure crawls up, covered by a black cloak, landing with a goofy stupid pose, arms out, and feet tipped out as well.

It was too stupid. And then... yeah...

The figure is running over arms out and trips.

It's gotta be...

"Killua!"

...Yep...

"He" removes the cloak revealing spiked-up hair, a fake crown sitting awkwardly in the mess of brambled locks, and a red cape, dragging across the floor...

"Gon!"

Killua snaps, teeth bared, feet stomping over, middle finger placed strategically near the others forehead to flick him as hard as he can. Killua crosses his arms, his grip on his phone still tight, making his knuckles turn even paler in shade.

"Ow! What was that for?!"

Gon rubs at his forehead, Killua glaring and raising an eyebrow.

"For scaring the living daylights out of me! How did you get up here, anyway?!"

He hisses, trying to keep his voice down while still emphasizing how annoyed he is, hands on hips.

"Oh. I climbed!"

Gon says matter-of-factly. As if this wasn't the Zoldyck Estate. A fifty-foot tall building. It is at this moment Killua notices the string of hard plastic around Gon's waist, and he brings his fingers to his nose, pinching the crease.

"You. What."

Gon looks back past the railing, his rope, and back to Killua, grinning with pearly whites as blinding as the sun.

"I climbed!"

It's official, Killua deducts. Gon Freecss is a freak. He didn't even look winded!

"You climbed? Did you also raid a Party City while you were climbing the Zoldyck Estate?!"

Gon brings a finger up that Killua grabs, getting close to Gon's face, seething.

"You IDIOT! Are you out of your fucking mind?!"

Gon doesn't look phased, patting Killua's head, slowly backing up.

"My turn!"

Gon looks at Killua dead set determination in the crease of his brow.

"Come with me."

Gon tugs at the wire around his waist, showing the knot is secure. No doubt, a way of reassuring Killua it's safe.

Killua stares dumbfounded, slowly slipping his phone into his pocket. Surely Gon had lost it.

Surely...

He holds out a hand towards Killua, his smile warm, those eyes large and welcoming.

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let me cut your hair and save you from here."

Killua splutters, tugging at a piece of his short hair, but Gon doesn't relent.

"Let me kiss you awake from this nightmare, Sleeping Beauty."

Gon giggles and attempts a wink, ending up shutting both his eyes; Killua gawks, bright red in embarrassment and pure horror.

This couldn't be... because of what he said in his text...? Right...?

Surely. Gon didn't think he was...?

"Cinderella, I found you fit perfectly in my arms-"

That's the final straw, Killua stumbles toward, and Gon snakes an arm around his waist, grinning down at the younger whose chin is tucked down; his ears pink from both the cold and Gon's antics, spreading across his face, darker at his nose like it always did in that perfectly adorable way. Well, Gon thinks it's adorable.

Killua looks up, glaring, smacking Gon on the chest, rather harshly.

"Enough already! I get it! S-shut up, you idiot! Just go!"

Of course, Killua understanding the implications snatches his phone out of his pocket and tosses it; he didn't want to hear a word from his family.

"Do you trust me?"

Gon peers down at Killua, who is tugging his arms around Gon's neck anxiously.

"...Huh? Do I trust the idiot who climbed the Zoldyck Estate?"

"Uh, yes-"

"Just go, you dolt!"

—

Killua feels a little more than dizzy by the time they reach the bottom, his head spinning and legs trembling, Gon keeping his hand on Killua's thin waist, so he won't fall.

He looks over and up slightly at Gon; how could this idiot still only be sweating a little?! He felt like he was going to be sick! Plus Gon had been the one to get them down with one arm... he really was...

"You think I'm really strong, huh?"

Gon stares at Killua with those big brown eyes like a puppy, wanting Killua to praise his muscles and how sexy- hold up!

Killua snorts, bringing up his palm to hit under Gon's chin.

"I think you're a total weirdo, stuupiiiiiddd!"

Gon whines, slowly letting go of Killua waist instead offering his arm for Killua to take, as he motions to his motorcycle.

"Your ride, my Princess."

Killua rolls his eyes. Stupid Gon. Of course, he took Killua's text seriously, this idiot. Of course. He took it seriously and probably really did raid a Party City; what, with that paper crown pinned to his head and the dumb red cape.

Stupid. Stupid. Gon.

Killua lets out a sigh, linking his arm with Gons before using his free one to grab a fistful of Gon's hoodie and tug him down, giving him a quick smooch on the lips.

It's awful, really. Their noses smash together, and Gon tastes like seafood, and Killua like expensive gross caviar. The younger's face is bright red when he tugs away, shyly looking towards the ground.

Gon. Well, Gon is ecstatic, his eyes lighting up and his grin growing larger than life.

He goes to speak, and Killua cuts him off.

"I-it was to thank you for saving me from the tower that's it, okay, s-stupid!"

He shouldn't really indulge Gon's habits like this, or else he might take all Killua's texts as a go ahead, and Killua doesn't need Gon running top speed into his class when he says he likes a certain flower.

Although... maybe... he likes the idea of being spoiled like that... just a little... only a little.

Either way, he's probably done for... looking at Gon, who is still grinning like an idiot, handing Killua a helmet.

Yeah, Killua Zoldyck is screwed.

#killua zoldyck #killua #gonkillu #gon freecss #gon freecs #hxh gon #hxh #hunter x hunter #killua hxh #hxh Killua #Gon hxh #;windy’s stuff #LET GON TREAT KI LIKE A PRINCESS 👏👏👏👏#added to my cardd cuz mood and true let Gon treat Ki like a princess! He deserves love!

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maybeimamuppet · 3 years

Text

someone gets hurt

“Janis! Janis!” Cady calls, rushing up to her at the end of the school day.

“Babe, you good?” Janis asks worriedly as her girlfriend barrels into her.

Cady nods rapidly. “Yes! Principal Duvall just told me I’m the valedictorian!”

Janis gasps, wrapping her in a hug. “You are? Oh my god, baby! That’s great! I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you,” Cady giggles from in her embrace. “Are you staying to paint today?”

“Yeah, you want to come?” Janis asks, plotting in her head. Cady has worked so hard this year, she deserves to be valedictorian, arbitrary as the title is. Janis should do something.

“Always,” Cady grins, leaning up for a kiss and taking her hand to lead them to the art rooms. “How is Damian?”

“He’s fine, it’s just a sprain. Texted me earlier high off his ass on painkillers though, that was funny,” Janis chuckles. “Said there was a dragon in his mashed potatoes.”

“Janis! Don’t laugh at him, you know he has a phobia of broken bones. He’s lucky it was just a sprain. Poor guy,” Cady chides.

“He fell down the stairs! I’m allowed to laugh,” Janis defends.

They’d decided to have lunch in the auditorium today, just for fun. Damian had finished eating early and showed off some complicated choreography from his college audition cuts. He’d absolutely nailed them, but during his bows and basking in the applause of his friends, had fallen down the stairs and sprained his foot. He’d fallen into a panic attack, thinking he had broken it, and was taken to the hospital almost immediately.

“He’s your best friend! I’m gonna tell him you laughed,” Cady threatens.

Janis snorts. “You little narc. Go ahead, he laughed at me when I broke my tailbone when we went roller skating.”

“Hmph. Who are you texting?”

Janis had pulled out her phone to text Regina. She loves throwing parties and giving gifts, she might have some ideas for something Janis could do to surprise Cady.

“Uh, my mom. I actually can’t stay today, uhm... Jules is... sick. I have to go help my mom take care of her,” Janis lies through her teeth.

“Oh. Okay. Do you need me to get her anything?” Cady asks, miraculously not having noticed. She struggles reading people sometimes.

“No, don’t worry about it, baby. It’s just a cold, but she gets really whiny and stuff whenever she’s sick,” Janis explains. That’s true, at least.

“Poor thing. Tell her I hope she feels better soon. I’m going to go visit Damian,” Cady says, popping up on her tippy toes to kiss her goodbye.

“Okay, baby. Tell him I said hi,” Janis responds, kissing her back. “I love you.”

“I love you too. Good luck,” Cady says back.

“Thanks,” Janis chuckles.

————-

“Hi, Dame,” Cady says sadly as she knocks on the door of his hospital room.

“Hey, Cads!” Damian says.

Cady chuckles as she comes to sit by his bed. “You sound better.”

“I got, like, hella painkillers a while ago. Went on some fun daydreams,” Damian replies. “Not high anymore though.”

“Good, I don’t know if I could handle you all hopped up,” Cady giggles. “Janis said you texted her something about a dragon in your mashed potatoes while she was in math class.”

“I did? Oh god, she’s never gonna let me live that down,” Damian sighs. “Oh well.”

“I’ll make her go easy on you,” Cady says confidently, pulling out an activity book she had made during study hall. “I made this for you. I know it’s a little childish, but I figured you might want something to do.”

“Aww! Thanks, Caddy. Ooh, connect the dots,” Damian responds as he flips through it. “What’s the matter?”

Cady turns from where she’s standing, frowning as she looks out the window. His view goes across the street, looking over a coffee shop. Janis lied? She’s in the shop, sitting with... Regina George. Hm. They’re laughing at something.

“Huh? Oh, nothing, don’t worry about it,” Cady says through grit teeth, coming back to his side and trying to hide her seething jealousy. He doesn’t need that right now. “So, how long are you stuck in here?”

“I get out tonight, once they’re totally sure I’m not reacting to anything they’ve given me,” Damian replies. “I’m not going to be in school for about a week, though. I’m not supposed to walk even with crutches until then.”

“You poor thing,” Cady responds as she rolls her shoulders to get rid of the tension. “I’ll visit you as much as I can, but I just got a huge English project that’s gonna take me a while.”

Damian pats her hand comfortingly. “I get it, Cads, don’t worry about it. I have this cool book to work on.”

Cady chuckles. “I’ll send other people to come keep you company on the days I can’t. And you have Pippa in the meantime.”

Damian laughs outright at that. His french bulldog doesn’t make a great caregiver. “Thanks, little slice.”

“Anytime.”

—————

“So how was Julie?” Cady asks during her daily morning meet-up with Janis on Monday. She wants to hear what Janis has to say, now that she knows she lied.

Janis doesn’t even look up from her phone, tapping away texts to... someone. Probably Regina. “Hm? Oh, she was fine, thanks. Just needed a rest. How was Damian?”

“He was fine,” Cady huffs. Janis had lied again. Janis hums noncommittally. “He went on a quest to fight dragons with a fairy princess and took me. I was an elf. You should really come next time. He’s a wizard, you know. I’m surprised you didn’t notice before. The doctor even had an enchanted sword.”

“Good for him,” Janis replies, having taken in nothing. The bell rings then, making them both jump. “Oh shit. Have a good day, baby. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cady responds, blinking in surprise at the quick kiss pressed to her lips before Janis runs to class. What the hell is going on with her?

Janis continues acting oddly into the next day. She’s not at lunch on Tuesday, and neither is Regina. Cady plops her tray of meatloaf on the table and sits down with a huff, startling Gretchen and Karen.

“You okay, Cady?” Gretchen asks worriedly. “You look tense.”

Cady stabs her meatloaf so hard that a few of the tines snap off her plastic fork. “Peachy. Has Regina told you guys anything? About what she’s been up to lately? Janis has been acting so weird, and I think Regina is part of it.”

“Um, no,” Karen lies. Regina had told them the plan to surprise Cady, so they actually knew everything. They had been sworn to secrecy.

“Yeah, we don’t know anything,” Gretchen piggybacks. “How has Janis been acting weird?”

“She... she lied to me,” Cady answers, realizing this may be more serious than she had originally thought. “I got chosen as valedictorian, I thought maybe we could go have dinner or something to celebrate after we visited Damian, but she said her sister was sick. But she wasn’t, Janis was in the coffee shop with Regina.”

“With Regina? Are you sure?” Karen responds. “Regina was with us Friday. And they still, like, totally aren’t friends. X emoji.”

“It was definitely Janis, at least,” Cady says sadly. “I guess it might not have been Regina. But how many other platinum blondes that wear full designer outfits would Janis know? Maybe it was before you guys hung out.”

“That is totally strange,” Gretchen responds, anxious about lying. She tries to change the subject quickly. “Has Janis done anything else weird?”

Cady takes the bait. “She wouldn’t stop texting yesterday, or this morning. I don’t know who she was talking to, but she didn’t even listen to me. I made up some story about Damian and I fighting dragons and she just said ‘good for him’.”

“Dragons? That’s so fetch,” Karen responds. “I want to meet a dragon. It’s one of my life goals, sunrise emoji.”

“Karen, sweetie, no. She said she made it up, remember? Dragons aren’t real,” Gretchen says quietly, squeezing her hand.

“That’s not fetch,” Karen huffs, going quiet.

“I know, sweetie. Anyway, I wouldn’t worry too much, Cady,” Gretchen says as she tries to comfort her girlfriend. “Janis is, like, head over heels for you. It’ll work out.”

“It better,” Cady grumbles. “Oh, hey, can you guys pop in to see Damian after school? Just for a little while, make sure he’s okay? I told him I’d have people drop by on days I couldn’t go see him.”

“Why can’t you go?” Gretchen asks, genuinely curious.

“I got this English project Friday, I have to work on it. I’m supposed to pick a career I want in the future and make a presentation about it, and it has to be five minutes long! I don’t even know what I want to do for a job,” Cady sighs.

“You can do it, Cady, you’re super smart,” Karen pipes up again. “Notebook emoji. But, like, shrug emoji, would Damian even want to see us?”

“Why wouldn’t he want to see you? He really likes you guys now. You’re not mean to him or Janis anymore, he doesn’t have anything against you guys anymore,” Cady says sadly. “You guys don’t have to go if you don’t want to, but he’d love to see you. You’re his friends.”

Of course we’ll go, we don’t have anything going on,” Gretchen responds. They need to fill him in on the plan, anyway.

“Oh, thank you,” Cady breathes with relief. “I owe you one.”

“It’s fine, Cady. Good luck with your project,” Gretchen says.

“Ugh,” Cady grumbles at the reminder, slamming her head into the table.

————-

By Wednesday afternoon, Cady is at her wits end. She hasn’t slept in two days researching for her project, and Janis still won’t pay attention to her. She’d gotten confirmation that it had been Regina with Janis at the coffee shop, so Gretchen and Karen had also lied to her face.

She heads to the art rooms after school to watch Janis paint, needing a break from her own thoughts. Even if she is a bit angry with Janis. Maybe this will patch things up.

Cady loves watching Janis paint. She loves the cute way her brow furrows and her tongue pokes out to the side whenever she tries to focus, the way every stroke of the brush seems to have a purpose. Janis can create gorgeous scenes just from her mind, as if the brush in her hand is simply an extension of her imagination. Cady loves watching a few simple sketches or swipes of her paintbrush turn to incredible works of art.

Cady’s tried to paint with her a few times, only succeeding in creating a blotchy mess of colors and a few vague shapes, but Janis always cheered her on and pointed out the things she had done well. Cady decided she likes watching Janis paint more than doing it herself, but they have painting mini-dates from time to time that they both enjoy immensely.

She opens the door quietly when she finally reaches the classroom, in hopes of surprising her girlfriend. She winds up getting the surprise herself, finding none other than Regina talking to Janis. Again. Regina is sitting haughtily on the counter, facing Cady but not looking at her. There’s a strangely excited glint in her eyes. Janis is leaning against a desk facing Regina, so her back is to Cady.

They’re awfully close together, Cady thinks as her face falls and her chest burns with envy. She thanks her lucky stars they haven’t spotted her yet, allowing her to eavesdrop for a second. She tries desperately to tamp down the voice growling ‘get away from my girlfriend’ in her head. There has to be some explanation.

Cady can’t quite pick up most of their conversation, but she does hear Regina say, “Cady’s not going to find out, Janis,” and lean closer.

That’s all she needs to hear. She feels herself let out a harsh sob, turning on her heel and running from the room. Janis whirls around just before the door slams shut behind her. “Caddy! Shit,” she calls as she breaks into a sprint after her. “Baby, please wait, let me explain!”

“What the fuck is there to explain, Janis?!” Cady yells at her, walking backwards for a second. “Just leave me alone. Go to her, I hope she makes you happy.” And with that, she turns and continues running.

“Baby, please,” Janis begs, reaching for her. Cady doesn’t turn back around.

Cady winds up running the whole mile back to her house without noticing, ignoring the worried calls of her parents as she barrels up the stairs to her bedroom, throwing her backpack off and burrowing under her covers. Her chest is starting to hurt with how hard she’s sobbing. Maybe she’s feeling her heart breaking.

How could I be so stupid with love again? Of course Janis would pick Regina over me. Regina has every American standard of beauty down pat, and a good personality now. What do I have?

She hears her phone pinging frantically, looking to see texts flooding in from Janis and Regina, both begging her to let Janis explain. She flips it to silent after sending her parents a text, letting them know to turn Janis away should she turn up at any point.

How could they do this to me? I understand why Janis chose her, but how could she be so cruel? Regina is supposed to be nicer now, how could she do this? It’s fucking Aaron all over again. I caught feelings for Janis and she snatched her away. And Janis... did she ever love me? How could she do this?

She rolls onto her side and soaks her pillow in tears, deciding she gets the decision to swear off of dating now.

Janis loses Cady as she reaches the main doors, panting with exertion. She turns to head back to the classroom to grab her bag.

“Janis, I’m so sorry, I had no idea she was there or I wouldn’t have phrased it like that,” Regina bursts out as soon as she enters, looking near tears.

“Reg, it... it’ll be fine. It has to be. I’ll go find her and try to explain again, I guess. Better to ruin the surprise than have her think I’m cheating on her,” Janis says in response, slinging her backpack over her shoulder and moving quickly back towards the door.

Regina sighs heavily. “Okay, good luck. I’ll text her too. God, she looked so... broken.”

“Yeah. Thanks, Reggie. Later,” Janis calls over her shoulder, hurrying towards the entrance to the building.

She pulls her phone from her pocket as she walks to Cady’s house, figuring that must be where she’s gone.

Jellybean: caddy that wasn’t what it looked like i promise

Jellybean: are you okay??

Jellybean: please let me explain

Jellybean: caddy you know me you know i wouldn’t do that to you please

Jellybean: baby??

Cady hasn’t answered or even read any of her messages by the time Janis is knocking on the door.

“Cady says she doesn’t want to see you,” Cady’s mother says harshly, protective of her cub.

“Mrs. Heron, please, I need to explain. She didn’t see what she thought she did,” Janis begs.

Mrs. Heron sighs. “Janis, I want to believe you, but Cady has been hurt by this Regina girl before. You need to leave, give her time. I’ll tell her you came by.”

She closes the door before Janis can get another word out. Give her time, Janis thinks as she walks to Damian’s house next, seething with anger.

Cady’s father wakes her up just before dinner, softly stroking her hair. She must have cried herself to sleep.

“Janis came by,” he says carefully. “Your mother sent her away like you asked.”

Cady immediately bursts into tears at the mention of her now ex-girlfriend. “I don’t wanna see her again. I want to switch schools.”

“Shh, binti. You’re a month away from graduation, you’re not switching schools. But you can stay home tomorrow. What happened?”

Cady cries harder. “Janis was-was talking to Regina in the art room and-and they were so close together and then Janis said something and R-Regina said that-that I wouldn’t find out about it,” she wails into his shoulder.

“Shh, ndege wangu mdogo wa wimbo. Did you hear what it was you wouldn’t find out about?” Her father hushes.

“She’s cheating on me! With Regina,” Cady sobs. “What else could it be?”

“Did you hear them say that? Or see them do anything?”

“No,” she admits shyly.

“Then you don’t know. You shouldn’t jump to conclusions, you’re going to jump into your grave one of these times,” her father chides gently. “You don’t have to today, or even anytime soon, but you should hear Janis out at some point, let her explain.”

“Fine,” Cady sniffs. “But what is she hiding? Janis tells me everything.”

“That I don’t know, binti. You take some time to think. I’ll bring up your dinner.” And with a forehead kiss, her father leaves her alone.

“Whoa whoa whoa, what?” Damian asks hastily, interrupting Janis. “Start again and slow down.”

“Caddy found me talking to Regina and now she thinks I’m cheating. She said she didn’t want to see me and won’t even read my texts,” she growls.

“Wow. That’s... out of character for her,” Damian says in shock.

“I know! I don’t know what to do, she won’t let me explain anything,” Janis huffs, terrified she might lose her girlfriend over something so stupid. “And now I’m wondering what the hell she really thinks of me. If she can’t trust me enough to know I would never cheat on her, especially with Regina fucking George, then should we even be together?”

“That’s a fair point, I guess,” Damian admits. “But that really doesn’t sound like Caddy. Something else has to be going on.”

Janis sighs, trying to get herself back under control. She can’t even figure out why she’s so angry. “Can you talk to her?”

Damian looks meaningfully at his wounded foot, but eventually can’t resist the urge to help his platonic soulmate. “I can try, I guess. Maybe convince her to hear you out. But I can’t explain what happened or get her to forgive you. You have to do that.”

“Fine,” Janis huffs. “Just make sure she’s okay.”

“She will be, Jan, don’t worry. I’ll text her, see if she can come over tomorrow,” Damian comforts.

“Thanks, D.”

————-

Cady warily checks her phone when she wakes up the next morning, surprised when she sees her most recent text is from Damian.

Big Slice: Do you wanna come hang out with me after school today?? Pippa is not performing her caregiver duties well enough

She sighs. It’s almost definitely a trap, Damian is Janis’ best friend. That thought gives her pause. If she and Janis break up for good, will she lose her friendship with Damian? And since Regina is involved, will Gretchen and Karen stop being her friends, too? If she doesn’t go talk to Damian, she might go back to being totally alone for the third time in two years.

Little Slice: Yeah, I’ll come. I’ll be over around noon. My parents made me take a mental health day.

Big Slice: 📷

Little Slice: Wait, Janis won’t be there, will she?

Big Slice: Nope just us :) She went to school and has to babysit Juju after

Little Slice: Good.

Cady hauls herself out of bed with a great deal of effort, surprised to see it’s already eleven. She trudges down the stairs still in her pajamas for breakfast, staring out the window at absolutely nothing as she munches on her cereal.

Climbing back up the stairs feels like she’s climbing Kilimanjaro again, but she manages and resists the urge to flop back into bed. She doesn’t even have the energy to brush her hair, tying it up into a knot and spraying a little extra perfume on in place of a shower.

She grabs her phone after she tugs on a sweatshirt and some leggings, texting her dad to tell him she’s going to see Damian.

Cady perks up a little on her walk over, the sun giving her some energy. She has a spare key, so lets herself into Damian’s house and heads to his bedroom.

“Hey, Cads, how are you?” Damian asks when he turns to look at her. Janis clearly told him everything, but he’s pretending not to know.

“Fine,” Cady whispers. She can feel tears burning in her eyes and knows if she tries to speak she’ll start crying. Damian doesn’t need her problems on top of his own and Janis’.

“No, you’re not,” Damian says, reaching for her. “Come tell me your troubles.”

“You have your own problems, you don’t need to hear mine,” Cady mumbles.

“Bitch, please, I live for drama. I’ve been holed up here for almost a week, give me something to do,” Damian begs.

Cady gives in to the cuddling urge, sliding in beside him and resting her head on his shoulder. She heaves a sigh to try and keep the tears at bay, to no avail.

“Did Janis tell you?” She says, choking out a sob immediately after.

Damian sits up to hold her better. “Yes, but I want to hear your side of things too.”

Cady sobs harder. “She was-was talking to-to-to Regina in the art room, and R-Regina looked... excited about something and then Janis said something to h-her and Regina said that-that I wouldn’t find out about it.”

“So what do you think they meant by that?” Damian hums sadly, rubbing her back.

“Are they t-together? Is she cheat-cheating on me?” Cady whimpers.

“Let’s work through this together, hm? You remember how Janis acted when she had a crush on you, yeah?” Damian asks, continuing when she nods. “Disaster lesbian. Has she been acting like that around Regina?”

“No,” Cady sniffles. “But-but she could be meeting her when I don’t know about it, and hiding it when-when I’m around.”

“That’s another thing. Has Janis been lying to you about where she is, or acting suspicious?” Damian asks comfortingly.

Cady is about to say no before she remembers Friday. “Yeah,” she wails. “On-on Friday, she said Juliana was sick... b-but when I was at the ho-hospital with you she w-went to that coffee sh-shop with Regina.”

“Okay, so we have one suspicious thing, I’ll admit that is weird,” Damian says, scolding Janis internally. “Has she done anything else?”

Cady sniffles as she pauses to think. “She won’t l-listen to me any-anymore. She spent all day Monday and Tuesday t-tex-texting somebody and didn’t hear anything I said, and then-then she missed lunch. She did-did yesterday, t-too.”

“That’s some bullshit,” Damian calls. “She shouldn’t be doing that, I’ll talk to her about that. Okay, so a few things. Back to our checklist. Has Janis stopped saying things like ‘I love you’ or giving you kisses and cuddles and stuff?”

“No,” Cady sobs. She misses that, so much. And it’s only been a day. “She hasn’t.”

“Has Janis ever willingly wanted to spend a long amount of time with Regina? In the entire time you’ve known them? Even now that Reggie is a decent human?” Damian asks, looking at her meaningfully.

“No,” Cady admits. “Not unless one of us is around.”

“So does it make sense for them to be together?”

“No,” she sniffles. “But what if she’s with somebody else?”

“Who would she be with?” He asks.

Cady stops to think. The only other lesbian Janis knows well is Sonja Acquino, and she had gotten a girlfriend over winter break. Girls at school still tended to avoid Janis. Unless she met someone outside of school, there’s nobody she could possibly be with. Cady spends most of her time outside of school with Janis, and Janis would’ve told her if she had met a fellow gay.

Cady processes this realization and bursts into sobs anew. “God, I’m so stupid. Is Janis mad at me?”

“No, little slice, no. Janis has been acting weird, you had every right to be suspicious. Janis isn’t mad, either. She’s frustrated that you won’t talk to her, and she’s upset that you think she would do something like that. But I think once you both take a couple days to process and regroup, you should hear her out and make her hear you out, and then you’ll be fine. You two are so fucking grossly in love, you’re gonna make it through this.”

“Thank you,” Cady sniffs. “For listening. I would’ve understood if you took her side. You’re such a good friend.”

“Thanks, Cads,” Damian chuckles. “I try. But really, I’m friends with both of you; I’m talking to you because I want to. You both have shit happening that you’re not telling the other one about; once you clear the air there won’t even be sides to this. And besides, you’re Pippa’s favorite auntie. We can’t let you get away.”

Cady gives a watery chuckle at that, wiping the tears from under her eyes. “God, I’m such a mess.”

“Bitch, you’re fine. Until, like, five minutes ago you thought you had your second major heartbreak in two years,” Damian chastises gently. “We have ice cream in the freezer, can you go get it for us please?”

“Yes,” Cady says, kissing his cheek and grabbing a tissue from the box on his dresser. “I’ll be right back.”

She hears the clacking of small claws following her down the hallway to the kitchen, turning to see the sweet little squished face of Damian’s french bulldog.

“Hi Pip,” she says in her baby voice. “How are you, puppies?” Pippa wiggles excitedly when Cady picks her up, scrambling to lick the tear tracks from her cheeks. “Oh, thank you. Have you been taking good care of Damian?”

She bursts out laughing when Damian calls “No!” from his room, apparently having overheard their conversation.

“Well that can’t be right, your little face could heal any injury,” Cady says as she sets the dog down. She opens the freezer, grabbing two pints of ice cream and some spoons from the drawer before heading back to Damian.

“Pippa would be a terrible nurse,” Damian says when she comes back. “She keeps tripping me every time I try to go to the bathroom.”

Cady giggles. “She’s doing her best, be nice. Here’s your ice cream.”

“Thank youuuuu,” Damian sings. “Now, what should we watch to get your mind off of things?”

Cady crawls back into bed next to him, helping Pippa up as she stands on her hind legs to see what they’re doing. “Have you found any new bootlegs?”

“Ooh, yeah, actually. I’ve had a lot of time to look,” Damian answers, grabbing his laptop from his nightstand and a flash drive from the drawer. “I found a really good quality one of The Lion King, do you want to watch that?”

Cady’s eyes go wide as she opens her ice cream and she nods excitedly. “I’ve just been watching videos of this monkey who’s best friends with a duck on repeat. It kept making me cry harder because they’re so cute. Your plan sounds better.”

“You are the biggest dork I know, I love you dearly,” Damian responds, bringing up the right file. “Alright, time to see some puppet elephants and shit.”

Cady cuddles into his side as the video starts, with Pippa resting protectively at their feet.

“Is Janis okay?” she asks quietly after they finish.

“Yes, she’s okay. She’ll be better after you two talk, but she’s fine,” Damian responds comfortingly. “I found one of Frozen too, do you want to watch that?”

“Yeah. Thank you.”

She stays over through dinner, watching musicals and playing card games with Damian to pass the time. He makes her promise to shower and clean her inevitably messy room when she gets home, and turn her phone back on.

She keeps her promises and heads to bed, feeling much more secure in her relationships than she did a few hours prior.

————-

Janis stays home from school on Friday, having woken up even angrier than she had the day before.

Her therapist in middle school had told her to find a constructive way to deal with anger, since she had a tendency to cause either severe property damage or accidental damage to herself with her impulse decisions. Damian had had to explain her way out of trouble several times.

So, Janis had taken up yarn crafts. She would knit or cross-stitch or crochet, finding the repetitive motions soothing. Plus, a lot of the tools were quite sharp, making her feel like she had weapons.

She’s aggressively working on embroidering new designs on her jacket right around the time she’s supposed to be in school, when none other than Damian comes barreling into her room, as if he’d felt a disturbance in the force and had come to make sure she’s okay.

“Phone,” he says immediately when he sees her face and choice of activity, hobbling over on his crutches and holding out a hand for it.

“Why?” Janis grumbles but shuts it off and hands it over regardless.

“So you don’t do something on it that you’ll regret later. Internet is permanent. You wanna go throw rocks in the pond?” He asks, as if she’s a toddler throwing a temper tantrum.

“Can you do that? You’re not even supposed to be on crutches yet,” Janis asks, raising an eyebrow at him.

“You know damn well I would saw my legs off for you, I’m fine taking a little longer to heal. Plus, I got cleared by the doctor yesterday, so yes I am supposed to be on crutches yet,” he says childishly as he sticks his tongue out at her. “Are we going or not?”

“Yeah,” Janis mumbles, throwing off her covers to go get dressed.

Luckily, Damian’s unhurt foot is the one he needs to drive, so he can still do so safely. He lets Janis play her Angory Times playlist on the way there, which is just a lot of loud, shouty songs one right after another. Damian normally hates this kind of music, but Janis can see him actively trying to be supportive and let her continue.

Fortunately for him, the pond isn’t too far away, and Janis sees him breathe a sigh of relief when he shuts the car off and the noise stops. Damian grabs his crutches from the backseat and heads off, Janis stalking after him.

She bends to pick up rocks on her way, also grabbing the ones Damian points to. His are for skipping, small and flat and smooth. Hers are just for throwing, heavy ones that will make a good splash when they’re hurtled into the water.

Once their respective collections are amassed, they stand next to one another on the shore and go at it. Janis feels her anger chipping away as she chucks her rocks like baseballs into the murky water, delighting in the splashes echoing around them.

This is part of why she loves Damian so much. He knows exactly what to do to make her feel better in any possible scenario, and is perfectly content to do something as stupid as throw rocks into a creek with her in complete silence. On a sprained foot, no less.

“Nice,” she pants when Damian gets six skips in a row with one of his.

“Thanks,” Damian huffs back. “How many fish d’you think we’ve concussed so far?”

Janis laughs at that, hurtling her last rock as hard as she can. It hurts her shoulder a little, but lands almost halfway across the pond. “I don’t think fish can live in this water, honestly.”

“You’re probably right. Feeling better?” Damian asks, skipping his last stone. Four skips isn’t bad.

“Yeah. Can we get coffee?” Janis asks, trying to catch her breath.

“Yeah. Come on.”

Once Janis has her iced coffee and Damian has his latte, they find a bench to sit on and just watch the world go by for a while.

“So, are you ready to talk about why I had to take you to go chuck rocks into the pond?” Damian asks gently.

Janis sighs. “I just... I want to know what she’s thinking. I thought she trusted me, that we trusted each other. If she can’t believe that I wouldn’t do that to the point of completely cutting me off at the first slightly suspicious thing, then do we even... have a relationship?”

Damian doesn’t say anything, just takes her hand and squeezes it to encourage her to continue.

“Like... what else is going on with her? What is she not telling me? I just-I just don’t know what she needs. I’ve never felt so disconnected from her before. I’m-I’m scared.” Janis murmurs.

Damian hums sadly. “Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah,” Janis mumbles.

“I really don’t think this is happening because Cady doesn’t trust you. I think it’s happening because she doesn’t trust herself.” Damian responds. “She was a wreck when she came over yesterday, she had obviously been crying and hadn’t showered, things like that. Her hair wasn’t even brushed. When Aaron got back with Regina she got hot and did our whole revenge party thing.”

Janis takes her turn to listen, letting him continue.

“Cady grew up with lions and shit. If she thought you were cheating on her she should’ve been angry, not sad. Just based on who she is as a person. There’s something more happening.”

Janis thinks on what he’s said for a second. “Doesn’t trust herself? What do you mean? Doesn’t trust herself not to cheat on me?”

“No, no,” Damian says hastily. He pauses, trying to figure out how to word his point. “I don’t think Cady thinks she deserves you. She doesn’t trust herself to be what you want or need.”

“Am I that bad of a girlfriend? How could she think that? Why wouldn’t she tell me she was feeling like that?” Janis asks, trying to hold back the tears burning her eyes.

“Because you might have told her she was right. You and I know you would never do that, and I think she knows that too. But her anxiety about it overrode her rationality for a while. Cady has a lot going on. And no, you’re not a terrible girlfriend. You’re a pretty good one, actually. This is your first argument, it’s understandable,” Damian comforts.

“I just... I don’t want to lose her. And this is so stupid, why can’t I just-just stop being so angry?” Janis grits out.

“I think it’s fair for you to be angry, honestly. Cady didn’t mean for it to be, but this is kind of an attack on your character. She accused you of cheating,” Damian replies, wrapping and arm around her shoulders.

“I guess. Feels shitty,” Janis mumbles, leaning to rest her head on his shoulder.

“It’s meant to. But try to think of how she’s feeling, too,” Damian says as he rests his cheek on her head. “I had to explain to her why it didn’t make sense for you to cheat, and when it finally sank in the first thing she asked was if you were angry at her. For even thinking you would do that.”

That finally gets the tears from Janis, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes as she feels any lingering anger directed at Cady fade into nothing. “God, Caddy. What do I do, Damian?”

“For now, finish your coffee. She invited you to explain tomorrow, yeah?” Damian asks. Janis nods. “Okay, so tomorrow go over and... do something. I know you didn’t technically do anything wrong, but maybe apologize for... how she took it, I guess? You were acting kind of shady. Make sure she knows you would never cheat, tell her she can trust you, stuff like that. Just take everything one step at a time.”

“Okay,” Janis sniffles. “Is-was she okay?”

“Not at first, I’ll be honest,” Damian replies. “She said she had been watching videos of this monkey and duck who are best friends to try to cheer herself up, and I had to watch two bootlegs with her to even see her smile. But once we had a chat and stuff she seemed a lot more secure. Confident. She’ll probably apologize before you even get a chance.”

Janis gives a watery chuckle at the mention of the inter-species friendship videos. “That’s my girl. Thanks for checking on her.”

“Caddy said the same things. She wanted to know if you were okay, said thanks for even thinking about her.”

“I miss her so much,” Janis sniffs.

Damian takes her hand again. “And that’s how I know this is going to work out. You’re both upset with each other, and yet all both of you can think about is making up so you can be together again.”

“I hope so.”

“I know so. Y’all are the most disgustingly loving couple I know, you both look at the other like they hung the stars. You two are going to be fine.”

“Okay. I love you,” Janis responds, wiping her tears with her sleeve.

“I love you too. You wanna go play with the birds at the pet store?” Damian asks, hauling himself back onto his crutches.

“You know me too well,” Janis replies with a small grin, following him back to his car.

————-

On Saturday, Cady tells Janis she can come over to finally have a talk. Janis decides to come in through the window for dramatic effect, nearly falling out of the tree she has to climb to do so until Cady hauls her in safely.

“What the hell, Janis? It’s pouring with rain, why didn’t you come in through the door? You could’ve broken your neck,” Cady insists like a worried mother, leaving to fetch her a towel. It’s strange, not immediately pulling her in for a kiss or hug. She doesn’t like it.

“I didn’t, though, and that’s the key,” Janis says, rubbing the towel over her hair quickly. Once that’s done she gestures for Cady to sit on her bed, sitting across from her criss-cross applesauce. She takes a breath to prepare herself, but Cady speaks before she can.

“Janis, I’m so sorry. I don’t-I don’t know what I was thinking, I should’ve known you’d never do that, especially with Regina. I hadn’t slept in two days, I was so irrational,” she bursts out rapidly.

“Hey, Caddy, shh. I’m supposed to be apologizing to you. I understand how that whole thing with Regina might have looked to you, so I’m sorry for that, first of all,” Janis says. “I’m sorry I ever made you think I would do that to you. I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you. I’m sorry I ever made you feel like you’re not enough for me. I love you. I need you to know I would never even think about cheating. It’s important we trust each other with stuff like that, from now on.”

Cady nods. “I do, I know you would never do that. I trust you, it’s just... Jesus, I don’t even know,” She sighs, burying her face in her hands.

“Cads, hey. Can I touch you?” Janis asks gently, taking her hands when Cady gives a nod and squeezing them. She hates this, it feels like they’re back at square one of their relationship. Maybe they are. “What’s going on?”

“I know Regina has worked on herself, a lot, and I hate feeling like this. But she took Aaron away right when she found out I liked him. What would’ve stopped her from doing it with you?”

“Me,” Janis insists. “I would have stopped it.”

“But what if she’s better for you?!” Cady asks pleadingly. “Regina could take care of you. She’s pretty, and nice now. She’s rich, and smart, and she can do art and stuff too. What- what do I have? I’m just some homeschooled weirdo from Kenya who doesn’t understand people and won’t shut up about math. I-I’m autistic, that’s gonna be hard to deal with sometimes, and in terms of looks I’m not anything special. I want you to have someone who makes you happy. You deserve someone like her. Someone.... someone better.”

“I don’t give a hot, crispy, Kentucky fried fuck what you think I deserve. I know what I want, and I want you. I want my Caddy, my Peanut, my Butterfly,” Janis says passionately, cupping her cheeks and looking into her eyes. “I want your pretty blue eyes and your red hair that smells like cherries and your freckles I can find constellations in. I want my math nerd who does calculus for fun and who can’t do art to save her life but tries anyway because she knows it’ll make me smile. I want my animal lover who makes friends with the squirrels in the woods and didn’t notice a deer followed her on her walk to my house, my girl who can tell me facts I never needed to know about lions and fun stories about Africa. You make me happy. I want you, baby. Nobody else.”

Cady throws herself at Janis, knocking her backwards onto the bed and locking their lips together. Janis kisses her back just as hard, gripping her waist so hard Cady can feel bruises forming. She doesn’t care. She’s flooded with relief at the familiar waxy texture of Janis’ lipstick, the comforting smell of vanilla from her soft skin and the safe feeling of being held in her arms. She pulls back for a split second to breathe before diving back in, gasping as Janis nips her lip and twines their tongues together.

When they finally pull back, Janis just cups Cady’s face to look at her, lips swollen and two-toned hair wild around her. “I’m so sorry,” Cady says, pulling back to sit again and burying herself in Janis’ shoulder when she follows. “I hated fighting, I love you, I’m sorry.”

“The only thing you have to be sorry for is not telling me you were feeling that way. This is only gonna work if we both feel okay about ourselves, and tell each other when we don’t. I’m sorry for not talking with you about this kind of thing sooner. This whole relationship needs to be based on trust and talking to each other, okay?”

Cady nods. “Okay. We both take care of each other?”

“Exactly, my girl,” Janis confirms, grinning as Cady kisses her cheeks. “But ourselves, too.”

“Have you ever felt like this? With me?” Cady asks gently.

“Of course. I wonder every day what I did to deserve you. I was so jealous the whole time you were with Aaron, and I thought you were way out of my league for a long time,” Janis responds, chuckling when Cady pulls back to look at her incredulously. “You’re so beautiful, and so smart. You were queen of the school for a good while, I thought you would at least want someone as smart as you, if not as nice and pretty. When we first got together I spent a lot of time wondering why you didn’t pick Kevin or even Regina over me.”

“Then I’m sorry too. You’re what I want, I love you. I love the way you always smell like paint, I love the one little chunk of hair that always slips into your face,” Cady says, brushing it behind Janis’ ear. “I love the way you’re so tough and strong and yet you cry over the snake food at the pet store and try to steal the dwarf hamsters every time we go. I love how you never let my feet touch the ground when we’re together, and how you seem so cold but give the warmest hugs and softest kisses. I love how you’re the only person who regularly asks for stories about Kenya and never tells me to be quiet, and how you let me ramble about math and at least pretend to be interested even though you don’t understand what I’m on about. I love that you let me call you stupid little nicknames even though it ‘goes against your image’. I love that you’re so passionate about everything, that you care so much about what’s important to you and aren’t afraid to let people know it. I. Love. You. So much. Promise me you’ll tell me if you feel that way again.”

“I promise, baby. I love you too,” Janis responds with tears in her eyes. Cady clings to her tightly, happy they seem to be okay again. They sit like that for a short while, content to be holding each other again.

“Janis?” Cady asks quietly after a moment.

“Yes, Princess?” Janis responds, opening her eyes again.

“What have you been talking with Regina about?”

Janis chuckles, kissing her cheek. “I’ve been trying to come up with something to surprise you with, to celebrate you being valedictorian. Reggie likes party planning and stuff, I thought she might have some ideas.”

“Really?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Oh my god, I’m so stupid,” Cady chuckles. Janis flicks her gently.

“Hey, no you’re not. You’re the valedictorian, for fucks sake. And I did not go about any of this correctly.”

“I didn’t either, I don’t blame you. But you don’t have to get me anything, Jayjay,” Cady mumbles sheepishly as she nuzzles back into Janis.

“I know I don’t have to, I want to,” Janis replies. “You’ve worked so hard, you deserve something.”

“What have you guys come up with?” Cady asks.

“Regina wants to throw you some kind of party, but that’s all we’ve gotten so far. I’m trying to talk her out of some sort of rager,” Janis answers.

“Oh, that sounds fun. But yeah, I don’t want anything big or crazy,” Cady says.

“What do you want? Since it’s not a surprise anymore. Might as well get your input,” Janis says in response.

Cady thinks for a while. “I dunno. Something with food. Maybe outside if it’s a nice day. I trust your judgement.”

“A dangerous choice,” Janis chuckles.

“I know,” Cady giggles. “But really. As long as it’s not anything crazy or expensive I don’t mind what you choose to do.”

“Okay. I can work with that. I love you,” Janis says.

“I love you too. I missed you,” Cady says.

“I missed you too, baby,” Janis responds. “Was torture without you.”

“We really have to do something for Damian, too,” Cady hums thoughtfully. “I would’ve totally spiraled without him.”

“God, yeah, me too,” Janis says. “You think of something to get him, we’ll give it to him on the same day we do your little bash.”

“Okay,” Cady giggles. She goes quiet for a long moment before piping up again. “Janis?”

“Hmm?”

“Can you help me with my English project?”

“Yes,” Janis laughs. “Of course.”

“Thank god.”

————-

“Hey, Cady, can we talk?” Regina stops her in the hallway on her way to study hall.

“Oh god, Regina! Sorry, you scared me. Uh, yeah, are you okay with talking in the bathroom?”

Regina grimaces, but nods. Cady follows her in.

“Regina, I’m sorry, I should never have accused you of trying to steal Janis,” Cady apologizes. “You’ve worked so much on being nicer, and it really shows, I’m sorry I ever thought you would still do something like that.”

“Whoa, Cady,” Regina says. “Um, it’s... fine. I wasn’t expecting you to apologize. I wanted to apologize, I should have been more careful with how Janis and I were meeting and stuff. I don’t know if she’s talked to you yet, but she would never cheat on you, especially with me. I think she still hates me. Please forgive Janis, none of this was her fault.”

“Gina, hey,” Cady comforts. “Janis and I talked this weekend, we’re back together. Everything is okay. We’ve all learned some very valuable lessons. I forgive you.”

“Oh thank fuck,” Regina sighs. “The universe has felt out of balance since you broke up. I was wondering what you guys were going to do to me that could be worse than the Kälteen bars.”

“I’m still sorry about those,” Cady mumbles sheepishly. “Let’s just, like... talk about stuff, in the future? Stop having to have moments like this?”

“Agreed,” Regina says. “You want to hug it out, don’t you?” Cady nods. “Fine. Thirty seconds.”

“I’ll take it,” Cady says happily. “I’ll make a hugger out of you yet.”

————-

“Jayjay!” Cady calls, leaping on Janis from behind.

“Jesus fuck! Caddy! Don’t do that,” Janis yelps as she turns around.

“Hi,” Cady says, grinning up at her. “I sowwy.”

Janis glares at her. “You’re forgiven. For a kiss.”

Cady happily obliges, reaching her arms around Janis’ neck as she leans up to kiss her sweetly. “Better?”

“For now,” Janis says, pecking her gently again. “Do you want to work on your project? I’ve been freed from planning your little shindig for the day, Regina wanted to go see Damian.”

“Aww, that’s nice of her. I definitely need your help, it’s due on Friday and I only have a couple slides,” Cady says.

“Tits. You ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Cady says, lacing their fingers together as Janis leads her to her truck.

Janis flops onto Cady’s bed when they arrive, reaching for her laptop to see what Cady has so far. She bursts out laughing when she sees the only slide Cady’s made.

“What’s so funny?” Cady asks. She’d been pretty sleep deprived by the time she actually got around to putting it together, but thought she had done a pretty good job.

“Did you proofread this at all?” Janis says in between fits of laughter.

“I hadn’t slept in two days at the time, but yes,” Cady replies, almost offended.

“Baby, this just says ‘I’m so tired. Please god let me sleep.’ over and over with a bunch of typos,” Janis says breathlessly, wiping tears of laughter from under her eyes.

“Oh. Oops,” Cady replies. Apparently she’s made less progress than she had thought.

“Next time, pace yourself. You need to sleep, Butterfly,” Janis says, reaching for her. Cady comes to sit on her lap.

“So, what career do you want to do this project on? It’s supposed to be what you want to do when you grow up, right?” Janis asks, holding her close.

“Yeah,” Cady mumbles. “But... I don’t know what I want to do.”

“Oh, baby, that’s okay. I don’t know either,” Janis comforts. “Do you have any ideas of jobs you want?”

“My parents want me to go into zoology, like them,” Cady replies. “And I’ve been... wondering if I should go into medicine. Like Rhys wanted to. Since he couldn’t himself.”

“But what do you want to do?” Janis asks. “I think it’s great that you’re considering medicine for your brother, but if it’s not what you really want then you shouldn’t force yourself into it.”

“I kind of want to teach math,” Cady mumbles shyly. “Like, to college or high school kids. Maybe get my PhD in math and stuff. I think math is fun, I want to help other people have fun with it too.”

“You would be such a good teacher, baby,” Janis comforts, kissing her cheek. “You should absolutely do that if it’s what you want. You’ll be successful enough to make your parents happy, and be doing something you’re interested in. That’s a great fit for you.”

Cady looks more than a little relieved at that, but realizes something. “I’d feel guilty though. I promised I’d become a doctor for Rhys when he died. I just... don’t really want to anymore. I don’t think I’d be very good at it.”

“Butterfly, Rhys would want you to be happy with whatever you choose to do. You already honor him every day just by existing. You’re so smart, and kind, and beautiful. I know you’re already making him proud, you don’t owe him anything else,” Janis reminds her. She never met Rhys, but from everything she’s heard about him she just made a true statement.

“Thank you, Jayjay. I guess if I did get my PhD I’d technically be a doctor,” Cady jokes. “I’ll decide later, I have a couple years.”

“That you do. Unfortunately, becoming a math teacher doesn’t make for a very interesting project, though, so maybe pick a fake career and we’ll look into that,” Janis says.

“I did actually want to be a zoologist when I was really little, we could do that,” Cady says.

“Sounds like a plan,” Janis replies as she kisses her cheek. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cady responds. “Can we just make out instead?”

“Tempting,” Janis says. “You get one minute of kissing for every half hour.”

“Fine.”

————-

“Hey, Cady, can you go to the mall with us after school today?” Gretchen asks, flanked by Karen.

“Yeah,” Cady responds. “Is this related at all to-“

“No!” Karen insists before she can finish.

“Karen, sweetie, she knows she’s having some kind of party. She just doesn’t know what’s happening specifically,” Gretchen says quietly.

“Oh yeah,” Karen says. “Then yes. They’re going shopping for supplies today and told us to distract you. Confetti emoji.”

“Ah,” Cady giggles. “Yeah, I can go. I’ll meet you guys by the main doors after school?”

“Caucasian thumbs up!” Karen responds, pulling Gretchen away.

“Yeah, we’ll be there!”

“Okay, Sarkisian, what’s this wonderful idea you’ve had?” Regina asks.

“A picnic!” Janis says excitedly. “She wants something with food and something outside. We’ll have a picnic in the park.”

“That... actually doesn’t sound terrible,” Regina says. “So what do we need?”

“A big-ass blanket,” Janis responds as they enter a party store. “And food. And Caddy loves balloons, but we should get those on the day.”

“Who’s gonna make the food, Jan?” Regina asks.

“Jules can, she loves to cook. She’s been wanting to practice stuff anyway,” Janis responds, looking at their selections of plates.

“How is she?” Regina asks quietly. She hasn’t seen Juliana since she and Janis were twelve.

“She’s good,” Janis answers. “Tall as shit, little evil genius. She’s super smart and sarcastic and stuff. She’s big into writing now, too. How’s Kylie been?”

“I... She... I’m...” Regina stutters. “She’s a good kid, but she’s turning into a little version of me. I’m trying to stop her before she gets to where I was.”

Janis hums sadly. “Well, at least you’re a better role model for her now. And you’re both getting the help you need. Kylie was the sweetest little thing last time I saw her, I don’t think she can get to your level.”

“I hope not,” Regina mumbles. “Cady likes yellow, right? We could do white and yellow, that would be cute.”

Janis gets the sense they’re done talking about their families for a reason, now. “Yeah, yellow is her favorite. We could go buy some white sheets from somewhere for cheap and then do yellow plates and shit.”

“Done. I’m buying,” Regina says, grabbing several packs of plates and napkins.

“No! She’s my girlfriend,” Janis protests. “I’m paying.”

“Jan, just let me have this.”

“Fine. ‘S your money,” Janis grumbles.

“Thank you.”

“Hmph.”

Cady, unfortunately, has study hall as her last class of the day in the English wing, so she has to rush to meet Gretchen and Karen by the entrance to the school.

She’s so excited to be spending time with them that she almost runs past them, managing to slow down just before she barrels into Gretchen.

“Hi, sorry,” she says breathlessly. “Who’s driving?”

“I will,” Gretchen offers. Riding with other drivers tends to make her anxious.

“I call shotgun!” Karen calls, already heading to the car. That leaves Cady in the back, which she doesn’t mind.

They put their backpacks in the trunk and hop in, Karen dancing along in her seat to the radio. Cady texts Damian on the ride there, since he had an appointment to check on his foot today. He’d been back in school starting that week, but was still stuck on crutches.

Little Slice: How was the doctor????

Big Slice: Good! I don’t have to use crutches anymore, I just have to wear a boot and go easy on it

Big Slice: No dancing for a while :(

Little Slice: Aw :((( You’ll be back to dancing soon though!!

Little Slice: And yay no more crutches!!!!!!!!!

Big Slice: Yeah now Pippa can’t trip me lmao

Big Slice: Wait aren’t you at the mall??

Little Slice: Yeah, we just got here. I just wanted to check on you 📷

Big Slice: Aw, thanks Cads

Big Slice: Go have fun I’m all good

Little Slice: Okay. Love you 🥰

Big Slice: Love you too, go eat pretzels 🥨

Little Slice: 📷🥨

She chuckles and shuts her phone off, following after her friends into the mall. “Are you guys wanting anything in particular or are we just here for fun?”

“Both!” Karen cheers. “We should totally buy you an outfit for your party. But I also want frozen yogurt.”

“Oh, I didn’t bring any money,” Cady remembers. “But you guys should have fun, I’ll just hang around.”

“No, it’s our treat. We haven’t paid anything for your party,” Gretchen says.

“You guys don’t have to do that,” Cady mumbles. She’s slightly embarrassed by all the attention she’s been getting lately.

“Money bag emoji, let us buy you stuff, Cady. We’re both pretty rich,” Karen says.

“Yeah, come on. Frozen yogurt and one outfit from, like, Forever 21 or something isn’t that expensive anyway, Cades,” Gretchen adds.

“Okay, fine,” Cady begrudgingly agrees. “Let’s do yogurt first, I’m hungry.”

Karen takes both their hands and hauls them towards her favorite shop.

Once they’re sufficiently full of yogurt and toppings, they head to find an outfit for Cady. Gretchen wanders off for a second, leaving Karen and Cady to browse some racks. She comes back with a beautiful white sundress, patterned with yellow flowers.

She shyly approaches Cady, offering the dress. “What do you think of this?”

“Oh, Gretch, this is so pretty! Let me go try it on, it’s beautiful,” Cady squeals, rushing towards the changing rooms. It’s a soft cotton, with a pretty tight bodice and a skirt that flares at her waist, and ends just above her knees. Gretchen seems to have remembered her sizes from their plastic days, the dress fits perfectly.

She opens the curtain to go show her friends, both of them clapping happily and squealing as she spins around. It’s different than it was when they went shopping last year. She can tell their reactions are genuine, rather than just trying to appease her.

“What do you think?” Gretchen asks shyly.

“Gretch, it’s perfect. It’s so soft,” Cady says, looking at herself in the mirror. It has short sleeves, so she might get a little chilly, but she can steal a jacket from Janis. “And, I can wear it to graduation too. It’s beautiful.”

“Oh, good,” Gretchen breathes. She’s working on not needing quite so much external validation, but it’s a slow process.

“You look hot,” Karen adds, making Cady laugh.

“Thanks,” She says, kicking up a heel. “Do you guys want to come over? Watch a movie or something?”

“Totally, that would be fetch,” Gretchen says.

“I’m so glad you still say fetch,” Cady giggles. “Let’s go!”

—————-

A few days later, Janis is typing the final few slides of Cady’s project as her girlfriend lays in her lap and dictates.

“And... you’re done,” Janis says as she enters the last few words. “Now we just need to proofread it and cite your sources.”

“Mmh,” Cady whines. “I hate citing stuff.”

“I hate it too,” Janis says, leaning down to kiss her gently. Cady rests a hand on the back of her head, keeping her close and kissing her back. Janis gives in for a second, before she resists and pulls back. “Stop trying to seduce me into letting you slack off, Peanut.”

“Fine,” Cady huffs as she sits up, still in Janis’ lap as she enters all her sources. “There.”

Janis turns her around to face her. “Good job, baby.”

“Thank you for helping me,” Cady says contently as she nuzzles into her. “I love you.”

“I love you too. So much,” Janis hums. “Have you thought of anything to get for Damian, by the way?”

“A couple things,” Cady says. “He mentioned something when you guys were telling me about Phillip last year, um... an... uh-“

“Edible arrangement?” Janis asks with a chuckle, remembering the story.

“Yeah! What are those?” Cady asks.

“They’re like flower bouquets but they’re made of fruit, so you can eat them,” Janis replies.

“Oh. We could make one of those? Does he like them?”

“That would be cute,” Janis says. “He likes fruit a lot, I don’t see why he wouldn’t like one. They can’t be too hard to make.”

“Don’t say that, you’ll jinx us,” Cady jokes. “We should decorate a little vase to put it in, too.”

“Sounds like a plan, Butterfly,” Janis says. “Are you excited for Sunday?” She and Regina had finally gathered everything they would need, and decided to have the picnic on Sunday so Juliana would have Saturday to prep the food, with the assistance of Regina and their moms.

“Yes! I can’t wait to see what you guys came up with,” Cady says happily. “I know it’ll be perfect.”

“Good,” Janis says as she leans in to kiss her. “I love you.”

“I love you more,” Cady teases.

“No way. I love you most.”

“Well... I love you... moster.” Cady stumbles, making them both laugh.

“Okay, fine, you win for today,” Janis chuckles.

“Ha! I win,” Cady says. “My prize is cuddles.”

“I can live with that.”

——————-

Sunday finally rolls around, and Janis is shaking with excitement. She’d spent the day before with Cady, putting together Damian’s thank you gift while Regina and Juliana spent the day cooking at her house.

She and Cady had both wound up absolutely covered in paint from trying to decorate the vase they had picked, and painted a Broadway stage on. Once they had scrubbed most of it off, they decided to start prepping the fruit, neither of them quite understanding how to turn a cantaloupe into a flower. Eventually they got the hang of it, putting together a rather lovely arrangement. Damian would like it, at least.

Cady had mischievously decided to chuck a melon ball at Janis once they had finished putting everything together, so Janis had thrown a grape back. Eventually every piece of the extra fruit they had had been thrown at someone, and they had a delicious mess to clean up.

Her jacket had also gone missing, which was slightly concerning. She had planned on wearing it to the picnic as well, but is wearing a backup since it never turned up.

“Janny. Breathe,” Juliana demands. as Janis is frantically running around trying to make sure everything is in place. They’d bought cheap white sheets and stitched them together to make a massive blanket, which is spread over the soft grass, and bought yellow balloons which are weighing the blanket down at the corners.

Juliana had truly gone all out, prepping almost all of Cady’s favorite foods. All sorts of sandwiches, chocolate covered strawberries, a cheese board, pink lemonade, and even an adorable froggy cake.

“Okay,” Janis says as she teases a deep breath. “You really did a great job, kid, this stuff looks great.”

Julie beams up at her as Janis pulls her into a hug. “Thanks, Janny.”

“Yeah, Jan, chill. Everything’s fine, just wait for your girl,” Regina says, adjusting a bunch of balloons.

“Okay.”

She doesn’t have to wait long, as Damian shows up about ten minutes later with her blindfolded girlfriend in tow. So that’s where her jacket had gone.

He leads Cady to a good place, where she can see the whole spread, before he unties her blindfold.

Cady gasps excitedly, taking everything in for a split second before she runs to jump into Janis’ arms. Janis spins her around as Cady giggles happily, grinning down at her. She pulls Janis down into a kiss as soon as she’s on her feet again, wrapping her arms around her neck and pressing the lips together sweetly.

“Janis, this is beautiful, I love it,” she says as soon as they break apart. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, baby,” Janis says quietly, leaning down to kiss her again. They only remember they’re not alone when everyone starts making gagging noises, Juliana somehow already on Damian’s back. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cady whispers, giving her one more peck before going to thank Regina and Julie. Regina begrudgingly accepts a hug, and Julie grins happily as Cady wraps her in a tight hug and kisses her cheek. Once that’s been handled she looks around a little more, smiling widely. “Should we give Damian his thing now?”

“Sure,” Janis says, heading to grab it as Damian does a lazy waltz with her sister. He only has to wear the boot for a few more weeks, luckily. “Dame!”

“What? Aww!” He squeals when they hold out his homemade fruit bouquet. “This is so cute.”

“It’s a thank you present, for telling us we were both being idiots but in a nice way,” Janis replies. “Neither of us want to think about what would’ve happened if you hadn’t been there to talk us down.”

“Aww. I should become a marriage counselor, if I get this kind of stuff every time,” Damian says, eating one of the melon flowers. He gasps with exaggerated drama as they both lean in to smooch one of his cheeks at the same time, pressing a hand over his heart.

“Thanks, Damian,” Cady giggles.

“You’re welcome. When do we get to eat?” Damian asks, cradling his bouquet.

“Once everyone else shows up,” Regina answers, coming over to join their conversation. “Speak of the devil.”

Cady peeks around Damian to see who else has arrived, going to greet the Mathletes, along with Karen and Gretchen with a hug.

She spends the picnic chatting with everyone, but also spends a lot of it stuck close to Janis. She’s either hugging her, in her lap, or holding her hand throughout the whole thing. It’s cute.

Cady and Janis stay behind after everyone else goes home to clean up, deciding to have a moment to themselves first. The sun went down a while ago, so they cuddle up on the blanket and look at the stars.

“I love you,” Cady says quietly after a while, rolling on top of Janis.

“I love you too,” Janis responds as she pulls her down into a kiss. “I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you,” Cady whispers, ghosting the words over Janis’ lips. “Today was perfect.”

“I’m glad,” Janis says. “Now kiss me.”

Cady obliges, cupping her face to kiss her as Janis rests her hands on her waist. Janis flicks her tongue at the seam of her lips, moaning quietly when Cady lets her in and their tongues meet.

They both know they should get to work soon, but for now their responsibilities are allowed to fade into the background. The picnic was wonderful, but not quite worth almost losing one another.

They lose the world in each other, tasting the universe on each other’s lips as the stars twinkle just for them above their heads.

All is well.

hope you enjoyed! this was a prompt fill for Hayeena and Aubrey_Plaza_Stole_HappiestSeason on ao3.

also, translation for the Swahili: ndege wangu mdogo wa wimbo: my little songbird. I have no idea if its accurate, I don't speak Swahili.

requests are still open! please leave them either here, on my ao3 or on my wattpad. all are the same handle, maybeimamuppet.

lots of love,

ezzy

#cadnis #paint by numbers #space safari #cady heron x janis sarkisian #cady x janis #cady heron #janis sarkisian #damian hubbard #regina george #gretchen wieners #karen smith #mean girls #mean girls musical #mean girls broadway

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poisonedapples · 4 years

Text

Roman Gets Help 1/5: Bad Nights

Part One: Virgil

Part Summary: Roman is always trying to make his anxiety more manageable with a bunch of different tactics. But a disorder is a disorder, and some days are worse than others. But at least his best friend Virgil is around to help.

Part of the Service Dog AU!

Pairings: Platonic Prinxiety

Warnings: Past panic attacks, medication, anxiety, Remus making poop jokes because he’s Remus, swearing and food mentions

Word Count: 2,751

Taglist: @hold-our-destiny @pricklyfish777 @romansleftshoulderpad

Notes: Cornybird on Ao3 deserves Many Squishmallows for editing so much of my stuff, including this. So send visual squishmallow vibes to her, she deserves it

Virgil really should have known something was weird when Roman didn’t text back.

The two had made plans during lunch to meet up at Roman’s house so he could help with Virgil’s Spanish homework. Roman was infinitely better with language stuff than Virgil could ever dream to be, and even when the work was done, it was always nice to hang out in his room and get away from his wild parents every once in a while. But since Roman left school early and Virgil had to stay after for band practice, he hadn’t heard or seen Roman in a while.

That in itself wasn’t weird, though. What was weird was that when Virgil texted him that he was on his way, Roman didn’t respond. Not even with an emoji reaction or a simple ‘okay’. But even then, what was even weirder was that Virgil was right outside his door, texting Roman to open it for him, and he still wasn’t responding.

Virgil checked the last three messages he sent to Roman’s phone. All of them were marked as delivered but not read, which was also very concerning. What could Roman be doing that he hadn’t checked his phone in thirty minutes? Virgil got anxious when he didn’t read messages immediately, let alone waiting half an hour.

Virgil sent him one last text before putting his phone away. You there? I’m outside.

No response. Virgil knocked on the door and shoved his hands in his pockets, waiting and shifting on his feet for someone to open the door. After a couple minutes, he started to think Roman had just forgotten.

However, a slight spark of hope rose up in him at the sound of the front door opening. But when Virgil looked up from his shoes to the person at the door, he felt his shoulders sag.

It wasn’t Roman who had opened the door. There was no shy and apologetic smile with Princess right under his feet. Instead, it was his bastard brother in ripped jeans and a green tank top, blowing bubblegum like a bully in a 90s Nickelodeon show.

“Well if it isn’t my favorite emo! What brings you here, Raven Way?” Remus asked, leaning on the door frame with a cocky smile.

Virgil rolled his eyes. “You’ve already used that one.”

“It’s my favorite nickname for you. It’s the perfect brand of insulting. It has spice to it.”

“I’m glad you’re entertained then. Is Roman out somewhere?”

Remus cocked an eyebrow. “No, he’s been up in his room. Last I checked he was as passed out as a corpse.”

“Okay...can I come in then?”

Remus smiled and opened the door for Virgil, taking a bow as he stepped inside. Virgil rolled his eyes again. This guy is so fucking weird. “You know where his room and the shitter is. Just follow the trail of dog hair to his royal highness.”

“You terrify me, Remus.”

“Good! That’s the aesthetic I’m going for. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with a bigass thing of chili dip in the fridge that may or may not be expired. We’ll see!” Virgil’s eyes narrowed as Remus skipped back to the kitchen and right to the fridge, but he really didn’t want to be around for that mess. Instead, Virgil went upstairs and turned left to Roman’s room, the colorful Disney decorations covering his door. Virgil knocked twice, but when met with no answer, he came inside anyway.

The first thing Virgil noticed was the lights. The windows and blinds were shut tight so no sunlight could get through while Roman’s fairy lights around his room were turned on. The soft twinkling gave the room a feeling of calmness, but the sight on the bed was more concerning than tranquil. Princess was sat down on top of the bed comforter with two arms wrapped around her, Roman blending in with the sheets he was under as he shoved his face in his dog’s fur. At least she didn’t seem to mind.

Roman looked up at the sound of the door opening. Virgil felt his heart sink when he saw the tear streaks down his face and his messed up hair, but Roman tried his best to respond to Virgil anyway. “Hey…”

Virgil took off his shoes and threw his backpack onto the floor next to the door. “Hey, dude. You look like shit.”

Roman made a strange huff sound, probably meant to be a laugh. “Thanks.”

He buried his face back into Princess’ fur, and Virgil felt that pang of worry grow stronger. He moved to the other side of the bed, sitting alongside Roman and his pile of blankets and pillows. “You okay?”

Roman shrugged. “I’m doing better.”

“What happened?”

“Panic attack.”

Virgil sucked the air through his teeth as a way to say yikes. “Seems like it was a pretty bad one.”

Princess rolled over onto Roman’s chest, and Roman cuddled even closer than what Virgil thought was possible. He looked so small when he did that. “Worse than usual.”

“Do you know what caused it?”

“No. Sometimes it just happens.” Roman kissed the top of Princess’ head. “Anxiety just...does that.”

“Yeah, I get it. Trust me, out of everyone you know, I’d probably be the one to understand it the most.”

“...Yeah.”

An awkward silence fell between the two of them. Virgil didn’t actually know what to do when Roman was like this. He’s stopped him from having panic attacks in the past, but he’d never seen him look this bad. Roman was curled in on himself under the covers, gripping onto Princess for dear life in an attempt to soothe himself. His pile of stuffed animals usually spread around the bed were now in a giant pile around his body, and his weighted blanket poked out from under the comforter too. It looked like he was trying his hardest to get comfortable, and Virgil didn’t know what else he could do. A distraction? A nap?

Well, only one way to find out.

Virgil took a deep breath in. “...Is there any way I can help?”

Roman shrugged again. “Not that I know.”

“Did you take a nap? That usually helps me the most.”

“I just woke up. My meds knocked me out.”

“Your meds?”

Roman took a pill bottle from his nightstand and showed it to Virgil. He read the confusing label that all medicine bottles have, but the name of the pills was long and unfamiliar in Virgil’s mind. Roman placed them back once Virgil got a good look and curled in on himself more. “Panic attack meds. They help you calm down really quick when you’re having an attack. They always put me to sleep after. Remus likes to call them my tranquilizer dart.”

Virgil snorted. “I mean...accurate name. I’ve just never seen you with those before.”

“I only take them on bad days. My therapist warned me about how I shouldn’t take them after every panic attack, because then I’ll never learn how to deal with them on my own, and I might get addicted. Which I’d rather not.”

“Yeah, I know about the addiction thing. I used to be on anti-anxiety until last year.”

Roman tilted his head up to look at Virgil for the first time. “Really?”

“Yup. I got eased off them after a while, though. Now I just take an antidepressant, which honestly isn’t much. I think everyone in our friend group is on some kind of meds.”

“...Patton?” Roman asked.

“Patton’s one depressed mother fucker. I say that out of love, but yes, he’s also on antidepressants.”

“And Logan?”

“...Dude. Epilepsy.”

Roman let out a silent oh. “...I forgot you take meds for that.”

“Our brains are fucked up and we accept this.”

Roman flashed a small smile but didn’t respond. After that, the two had fell silent as Virgil awkwardly patted a beat on his leg to put his nervous fidgeting to use.

What do you do for someone getting out of a panic attack? It was obvious Roman wasn’t in a talking mood, but it was killing him inside to just...sit there while he looked so helpless. But he’d never had to deal with this with a friend before. The worst he’d dealt with were Patton’s bad depression days, and those had nothing on how horrible Roman looked right now. And if he already took a nap...what else were you supposed to do after a panic attack?

Virgil thought back to his own experiences. Of course, Virgil’s anxiety was nothing compared to Roman’s, but it was better than nothing. And comfort worked no matter how bad you felt, even if it was only a little.

He thought back to his own parents. How his mom would hold him and let him cry into his shoulder if he needed to, but that was too awkward for him to do with Roman. His dad would let him curl up and watch him play games on the console, which could maybe work…

...Then Virgil remembered another thing his mom did once after one of his worst panic attacks. It might be a bit embarrassing because of intimacy, but it would help Roman feel better. And that’s all that matters.

“I’m gonna go get some stuff, okay?” Virgil said, “You stay right here.”

Roman hummed. “Wasn’t planning on going anywhere, but okay.”

With that, Virgil hopped out of Roman’s bed and left the bedroom.

First, he needed a water bottle. Roman probably had some water when he took his meds, but it likely wasn’t enough to stop a headache after all the crying. Virgil went downstairs to the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge. While he was there, he looked through the rest of the fridge and noticed that there was no container of chili dip in there anymore. Gross.

Expired chili dip aside, he would need a face rag as well. Virgil went through a hallway on the first floor to the older bathroom downstairs, looking through the drawers for a decent cloth. A small one was hidden in the back of the drawer with some bottles of face wash and lotion, so Virgil grabbed that and took a mental note to put it back later. He stood in front of the faucet and stared at it for a while.

Was cold or hot water better for getting tears off someone’s face? Warm water seemed like it’d be more comfortable, but cold water could also be more refreshing. He thought about the possibilities for a while and settled on warm based on his own preferences, turning the hot and cold handles to where the water was only slightly warm, wetting a side of the cloth then turning the faucet off.

Before he left the bathroom, Virgil grabbed a couple squares of toilet paper and then headed out the door. He was back in Roman’s room not even five minutes later, setting his stuff on the nightstand for a second as he grabbed his DS from his bag and turned it on. Roman glanced up from the bed with a confused look, but didn’t say anything. Virgil came back next to the bed and motioned for Roman to move to the middle. Reluctantly, and with some shifting of Princess still at his side, Roman did so.

Virgil sat in Roman’s old spot and grabbed the wad of toilet paper. “Here, sit up and blow your nose. The last thing you need right now is more breathing problems.”

Roman grunted as she shimmied out from under his weighted blanket to sit up against the headboard of his bed. He took the toilet paper from Virgil and blew. “...Thanks.”

“No problem. Now just stick with me for this next part, because I’m not good with touchy-touchy shit, so this’ll be a little awkward.”

Roman gave Virgil a confused look, but he didn’t say anything. He grabbed the damp cloth and silently tilted Roman’s head to face him. Virgil tentatively lifted the cloth to his face and wiped the tears from under his eyes, the gesture mixed with the warm water making Roman hum in content. Virgil didn’t acknowledge what was happening, he just wiped off his friend’s face, flipping to the dry part of the cloth to dry him off after.

“There. That should help you feel less gross, anyway.”

“Thanks...it helped.”

“Yeah, don’t mention it.” Virgil set the cloth to the side and handed Roman the water bottle. “And drink this, it’ll help with that nasty headache you probably have.”

Roman twisted the cap open and chugged the bottle, finishing half of it in record speed before putting it down again. Virgil could tell by how fast he chugged it that his head was probably throbbing.

“Feeling a little better now?” Roman nodded. “Wanna watch me play Harvest Moon until you probably pass out again?”

He nodded again, Virgil scooting closer to him so Roman could place his head on his shoulder as he watched. His hand combed through Princess’ fur as Princess trapped the other under her paw to lick. Most people would think it was gross, but considering licking was one of her grounding techniques, he was desensitized to it by now. “Which one do you have?”

“A New Beginning. I’ll show you all my cows because they’re bomb as fuck. My first cow is named Oven and I have a baby one named Chaos.”

Roman laughed as Virgil started up the game. “Awesome. You play it often?”

“Eh, sometimes. It’s not my favorite game, but I carry it with me because it’s good for calming anxiety down. All I gotta do is feed my animals and mine and shit. Nothing else matters, you know?”

Roman nodded as best he could from Virgil’s shoulder. Virgil loaded up his save file and started to show Roman around his farm, mostly skipping the crops and going straight to the pets and farm animals with the most ridiculous names Virgil could get away with using only six letters. Virgil chatted away about his game and read all the speech bubbles out loud, showing off his wife who he swears he married platonically since his character was obviously gay and talking about his rivalry with the hair stylist. Roman wasn’t responding much, just a few hums and little laughs here and there, but Virgil didn’t mind. So long as his friend was feeling better, that was all that mattered.

A while later, Virgil was baking desserts for a contest being held in town when he spoke up again. “I’m shit at cooking good stuff in this game, but I can make some neat pancakes, apparently. I’m gonna make this contest my bitch.”

There was no response. That wasn’t very strange in itself, but usually when Virgil sweared, Roman at least made a small huff of a laugh from his shoulder. But this time, he was completely quiet. Virgil looked over at his shoulder when he almost awwww’ed out loud.

Roman had fallen back asleep, his mouth open slightly with his arms cuddling Princess extra close as she seemed to relax alongside him. He was adorable, and in a moment of softness that Virgil would deny to the end of his days, he helped Roman to lay back in bed and brushed the hair out of his face. Roman still clung slightly to him even as he slept, so Virgil accepted his fate and moved to curl up alongside him, continuing his game with a smile on his face.

“Your sleep schedule is gonna be absolutely fucked, dude.” Virgil said. There was no response, obviously, and Virgil didn’t talk to his sleeping friend after that. He just took a mental note to tell his parents he was staying the night before it got too late and kept caring for his farm.

Maybe later he’d wake Roman up and get him some dinner, letting him recharge and take a shower before they actually had to go to bed. He’d be too awake to actually sleep at first, but the company of his friend and the comfort of his dog would keep him calm through that, even when Roman hated being awake past eleven. Patton may even find out and tease Virgil about having a heart after all, which Virgil would deny until the end of his days. But his edgy reputation wasn’t what mattered right now.

Instead, Virgil smiled and cuddled closer as Roman slept peacefully.

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #service dog au #ts roman #ts virgil #prinxiety #platonic prinxiety #food mention #panic attack mention #ts remus #remus sanders #medication mention

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i-need-air · 4 years

Text

Bakugou Katsuki – The wait before the promise.

Summary: He just doesn't understand make-up but for once he sits and waits because tonight is the night. Grown up Bakugou.

Notes: Here to throw something that's been in my BNHA folder for a month now and wasn't sure of it. I'm kinda MIA because I'm lowkey [but not so lowkey] obsessing over Haikyuu now so I might just throw some volleyball in my blog, who knows, who knows! Ty for reading this mess! [What is proof reading? Hah! We die like men here!] ♥ ♥ ♥

He really didn't understand it, although throughout their relationship he always did his best to at least try to. It has been his mother that had to slap [literally] some reality in his head after one big argument, just after they graduated. If he wasn't willing to put work in their relationship, visibly, not just assume everything is alright and/or it'll fix with time, they'd crash and before he'd know it he would've lost the love of his life.

Bakugou Katsuki wasn't much of a talker in terms of feelings but it didn't take him long to realize she was, without a doubt, made for him and vice-versa. And over the years the now man learned to communicate things through. Well, at least he's getting there.

What his brain couldn't wrap around is why in the actual fuck was she taking one [1] hour to do all her make-up. For a simple double date with Shitty-Hair and Racoon Eyes, or so she thought. And beyond that, what baffled him the most when he inquired about it was that she was looking to perfect the Natural Look™. [Y/N] said it so casually while applying that weird ass skin colored cream over her face with a literal sponge, ignoring his shocked face staring her down in the bathroom mirror.

Was she seriously trying to put make-up on her face just to have it look like her normal natural face? For once in his life-time Katsuki was at loss of words, choosing to bite his tongue and sit like a good boy on the couch and wait. He was already dressed, ready to go, the scent of his new cologne was annoying the hell out of it and overall he was getting impatient although not with her. Other things were on his mind too and maybe, just maybe, he was having this beauty product existencial crisis because he needed to calm down.

He started muttering to himself, tapping his fingers on his knee while seriously trying to figure out his partner. Or women in general. Last time they had a chat about a similar topic she just informed him that not everyone has his genetics, meaning his perfect skin, which made him roll his eyes but grin, conversation forgotten because he's a sucker for her compliments.

Getting up to grab a beer while checking the time, he saw her make weird faces in the mirror, applying god knows what and he couldn't help but make a face himself. Undeniably, she was cute, something he'd never ever say out loud, yet he couldn't help but stare from the hall, beer now in hand as she winked at him in the mirror. With a small smirk, he took a gulp and just observed in silence.

Why was she hiding her beauty marks though? Or that small scar she got from that mission they kicked ass together? He loved that about her, the small details on her face and body that he not so embarrassingly learned by memory at this point. And seeing her hum to herself proudly after throwing some brown powder under her cheekbones, somewhat and very slightly making them more pronounced, small smile of victory on her bare lips, he smiled with her.

It would've been weird to have someone lean against a wall watching you do something in basically another room but even if she felt his eyes on her, it seemed she didn't care. Maybe after all these years the woman got used to his intense eyes on her figure. Oh, how he loved watching her. From the first year in UA until now and without a doubt until forever. Yet here he was, admiring her, picking up her habits, such as the small squint of eyes when she was concentrating, slight pout on her lips whenever she didn't get the eye-make-up or whatever that light pink color was for not working how she wanted, her beautiful eyes shining when catching his.

And that's when he started noticing how her [e/c] orbs popped out more, complimented by the main color adorning her eye-lids. Her lashes, now longer, gave them a more cat-like shape. Those lips he kissed many times looked fuller yet he knew that sticky transparent gel on them was a pain in the ass. But he got it, finally, because until now he never watched her transform herself like this. Yes, he saw the before and after, and she was beautiful with and without make-up on, but has never stayed to watch her do a not so Natural Look™ and found himself letting out a chuckle because even after... how many years passed already? Eight whole years of knowing each other, of being by each other's side, he still found solace in observing her.

So when she let go of her hair, ruffling it a little to go along with her theme for the night and turning towards him with a smile, catching him already sending a smirk her way.

"I think I'm ready." she said, jumping a little then proceeding to adjust her summer dress.

"Whaddaya mean you think?" he said, giving her a mock-incredulous face. With a last sip of his beer, he headed towards the kitchen in an exasperated sigh, leaving her giggle in the hallway. Her soft pats walking away probably towards their bedroom gave him time to take a deep breath and check the time again.

They had reservations at nine sharp. Well, the restaurant wouldn't mind since they were the only ones scheduled in the premise for the night.

Checking his phone, Kirishima send him his good lucks [as if he needed it, pft] while Mina spammed him heart emojis and... fairies and butterflies? Disgusting. Whatever. It's not like it made him smile or anything.

"You're awfully smiley today. Did Izuku get down in ranks or something?" she joked, catching a glimpse of his features. Of course, their rivalry/friendship got much better over the years yet somehow they still had this dumb competition about whoever will be the number one. So childish and Men... would be what she'd comment whenever those two big idiots competed.

But no, tonight was about her, about them.

"I swear, woman, can't I smile without you interrogating me, hah?"

"You know I didn't mean it that way, Katsu!" she said with an exaggerated pout. "I love it when you smile, that's why I say." He almost choked on his saliva when hearing that.

"You'll see, dumbass." Smooth Bakugou Katsuki will always remain smooth. "Also, what the hell does Natural Look means? Isn't that make-up on your face, woman?" he inquired, changing the topic of the conversation while grabbing his and her jackets, house keys, all while waiting for her to put her heels on.

"What do you mean, does it look bad?!" her head snapped, eyes shooting daggers at him. He couldn't said something before?

"That's not what I meant!" his stomach suddenly decided to adopt a zoo, give all the animals some crack and put heavy metal on the highest volume. They were leaving. "You look good, I just don't get it why you'd—"

As he opened the door for her, rolling his crimson eyes at her fluttering eyelashes, over-exaggerated towards him while she gave an explanation, Bakugou knew that he didn't care whatever she wore that day, either face or body, because all he cared was about the little box in his pocket, the vacant restaurant they had their first date at, the catering crew he hired just for them and [Y/N] just being there. Oh, and the small detail of her saying "Yes".

So they left, echoes of their voices arguing like an old married couple, her teasing, his smart ass remarks and a promise in the air. The next time they'd cross the door of this apartment, she'd be bounded to be his, forever and always.

Oh. The dawning sun hit her highlighted cheeks softly, giving her an ethereal vibe. Yeah, he definitely gets it now. She looked even more breathtaking.

#boku no hero academia #my hero academia #noire writes #bakugou katsuki #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou #bakugou x reader

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kirishwima · 4 years

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Can I please request the RFA recognising MC as someone they had a crush in middle/high school?? and whom they haven't seen in years. Pretty please. Also V maybe if that's not too much to ask?

awe that’s such a cute idea! sorry it took me so long to get to writing it T-T

I won’t write V right now as I only have a limited amount of time, but I’ll add his story in a reblog soon!

But since it’s difficult to write for Seven and Ray given their canonical story, I’ll skip them for now-if you’d like me to write an AU version for the two please let me know!

I’ll be using they/them pronouns for MC since you specified them as such!

YOOSUNG:

* We know he was quite the popular boy in high school, even getting love letters~ He wasn’t all that interested in anyone at the time though, too busy studying instead

* There was however one person who caught their eye; they sat right next to Yoosung, and whilst he never paid much mind to them before, he once overslept, ran to class late, and after getting a good scolding from the teacher, he realized as he rummaged through his backpack he forgot his textbooks.

* MC, seeing his frazzled expression and his desk devoid of books, simply slid their book closer to him, acting nonchalant all the while. They didn’t want the poor guy to get scolded by the teacher yet again after all.

* To Yoosung, at that very instant, MC looked like an angel that fell from the heavens, here to aid him in his moment of need...and they were cute to boot...it didn’t take long for him to start talking more often with them, his upbeat personality endearing and MC’s charm enough to make him develop his very first crush.

*It’s not like they were in the same friend group or anything, so they only saw each other during certain classes, but they chatted often enough, greeted each other in the hallway-and Yoosung couldn’t help the blush on his cheeks everytime MC smiled at him, shoving his friends playfully when they teased him over it.

* Even Rika asked him about it once, after he nonchalantly mentinoed MC, his cheeks betraying his emotions as she took note of that-(I’d like to think it’s one of the reasons she later on chose MC to send to the RFA *eye emoji)

* But well, time passed, final exams came and the stress of it all overtook everyone, and before anyone knew, graduation came and went-he wanted to find MC during the graduation ceremony, tell them to keep in touch, but with the large number of people around that day it’d be a triumph to even spot MC in the crowd.

* So when years later, MC stumbled in the RFA chatroom, Yoosung didn’t immediately recognise them-only when they got to chatting, realised they both went to the same high school, and took the same classes, only then did Yoosung realise just who MC really is-and boy was SHOOKETH. That MC? His first and only crush?! Is now a member of the RFA? And he gets to talk with them again?! Suffice to say, Yoosung would NOT let this chance go, not this time.

ZEN:

* Zen actually met MC in middle school, back when he still didn’t really realise just how pretty he is.

* Girls would constantly flock around him, even teachers would gush and tell him he’s so pretty-but that never made little Hyun feel good about himself. It felt suffocating, weird to hear such words then go home to hear the exact opposite. Just who was he supposed to believe?!

* Once whilst running away from a group of kids trying to touch his hair, he ran into a seemingly empty classroom and shut the door behind him, ducking down to avoid being seen through the classrooms’ windows. What he didn’t initially notice, however, was a piano, a relatively simple wooden one in the corner of the room, a little kid sitting there, their feet barely reaching the pedals beneath, staring wide-eyed at him.

* He motioned to the kid to stay silent as he shuffled towards them, hiding behind the piano as the flock of kids came by the class, one even opening the door to ask the kid sitting at the piano-MC, if they had seen a ‘pretty boy’ come by.

* MC side-eyed Zen, raising a brow as they turned to the kid standing by the door. “I didn’t see any pretty boy” they stated, “but if you’re looking for someone with white hair...they went that way” they said, pointing down the hall.

* Once the door was slammed shut and the sound of feet hitting the floor was but a distant echo, Zen got up from his hiding spot, coming to sit beside MC, breathing a sigh of relief.

* “Thank you” he sighed, “they kept trying to touch my hair” he elaborated.

* MC looked to him with furrowed brows. “Why?” they asked. Even Zen was taken aback by the blunt question; everyone he met kept telling him how his hair was like snow, how soft it must be, some even trying to touch it right away. Yet this kid looked to him like it’s such a stupid thing, like there’s no point in trying to touch his hair-it was a breath of fresh air in his hectic world.

* He laughed-he couldn’t help it! “I don’t know!” It was the truth.

* That was the day he and MC became friends-they were in different classrooms, but he’d ocasionally come visit them during breaktime, and MC even taught him how to play the piano-he could proudly play the entirety of ‘Twinkle twinkle little star’ by the time the end of the year, and by the time they were about to graduate middle school, he’d already learnt quite a lot, even practicing on his own when MC wasn’t around.

* They promised one another they’d keep in touch, Zen admitting he didn’t have any plans of going to high shcool, how he wanted to become a musician, how his parents had started getting stricter and stricter-when he decided to finally run away, he knew he wouldn’t be able to keep in touch with MC, not in the way he wanted to at least.

* It took a while for him to realise he liked them-it was only on the day he ran away, sitting on a bus to nowhere and everywhere when he realised the only person he’d miss, the only one he regretted never saying goodbye to, was MC-and it hurt more than he’d care to admit, the realisation he’d never get the chance to see them again, to admit these feelings to them.

* Well time passed, and whilst MC still kept a dear place in his heart, the memory of them slowly started fading away, their features hazy in his mind.

* When MC stumbled upon the RFA chatroom and gave them their name, Zen hummed to himself, a small nostalgic smile on his lips.

* “MC huh”, he typed, “now that’s a name I haven’t really heard in a while. Actually, my first crush was named MC!”

* Oh ho ho Zenny boy....when you find out that MC and this MC are one and the same.........

* He’ll die a blushing mess bc he’s a soft boy and can’t wait to hold MC close and express the feelings he’s carried in him for so long OKAY.

JAEHEE:

* She met MC before her parents passed away-when she was still a little child, her hair long and her smile wide, her eyes shining like the sun with glee.

* She and MC met on the first day of kindergrarden-MC had been running towards the school gates, tripped and scraped their knee, and Jaehee was there to witness it all.

* Unable to see someone in pain, Jaehee walked to MC, kneeled down beside them and used the end of her skirt to wipe the few droplets of blood from the wound. She then patted the wound, and gave a quick kiss to MC’s knee.

* “That’s what you should do when someone gets hurt!” Jaehee said, her smile gentle, “now it’ll get all better!”

* MC was so awed by this magician-schoolmate, she couldn’t help but follow Jaehee around the entire day, asking her if she knew any other magic spells, even told every other kid about how ‘fairy Baehee’ stopped their knee from hurting!

* It was an adorable friendship-they’d refuse to leave each other’s side all throughout class, would only reluctantly seperate when their parents came to pick them up.

* They’d often even stay at each other’s home, having more than one sleepover where they tried to stay up as late as possible and failing.

* When other kids started to get interested in romance, Jaehee frowned. Why would she need anyone else than MC? She didn’t need a ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend’ or whatever they were called.

* One day as she was getting ready for dinner, she looked to her mom and asked her if she knew how one can know if they want a girlfriend or boyfriend. Her mom laughed, Jaehee’s honest curiosity too cute for words, and picked her daughter up, sitting her on the kitchen counter so they could speak face to face.

* “Baby, to have a boyfriend or girlferiend, you have to be in love with them. I can’t tell you how to be sure you love someone, because it’s different for everyone. But with your dad” she started, humming in thought as she ran a hand through Jaehee’s long hair, “well, I knew if someone tried to tell me not to be with him, I’d hate that. And I know I want to be with him, no matter what.”

* Her mom tried explaining further, but Jaehee didn’t need any further elaboration-she immediatly knew who she loved.

* She let her moms words simmer for a while longer, but never got a chance to let MC know how she felt-her dad passed away shortly after she entered middle school, and she and her mom ended up having to move away, her confession hidden to the back of her mind as she dealt with all this new information and changes.

* She and MC tried to keep in touch even after she left, but being so young and not owning a phone or any social media, it was hard, to say the least. By the time the two were old enough to (responsibly) use the internet, memories of one another faded, and with Jaehee’s history, it was hard to even find the time to think of MC-though she would from time to time, as she lay awake in bed, wondering what happened to that kid she once loved.

* MC stumbling into the RFA was like fate’s way of giving Jaehee a second (or well, first) chance at love-and an apology for torturing her in the hands of Jumin Han and Elizabeth the 3d lmao

JUMIN:

* We know he went to a prestigious school, but down the street from his fancy private school was a regular high school, one where our dear MC studied at.

* If it were on his own terms, Jumin would never really pay a second glance to that school nor its students-not that he cared much for his own classmates either lol

* But well, one day his driver was running late, and he was stuck waiting for him at the front steps of the school, unable to take a step further-not in the crazy rain that fell vigorously down to the street, soaking any unsuspecting passerbys that had forgotten to bring an umbrella with them-Jumin being one of them, as was MC.

* “Shit! Ah, crap, no-” a litany of curses could be heard as a person ran towards his schools’ entrance, towards Jumin-he took a step to the side as a figure came to a halt besides him, taking shelter from the rain besides him.

* He raised an eyebrow at the person who stood beside them, their hands resting on their knees as they caught their breath after running, their cloathes soaked to the bone, their skin visible through their flimsy school shirt. The colours and the emblem on the coat they seemed to have tried and use as a make-shift umbrella showed Jumin it must be a student from the school down the street-not that he was interested or anything.

* But well, he was waiting for his driver and had time to kill since V had already left, so...

* “That’s quite the vulgar vocabulary for someone your age” he stated, surprising the person as they looked up to him.

* “Oh yeah?” they asked with a raised brow, “they don’t teach curse words in your fancy curriculum?” they teased, ready to cut the conversation with this pompous rich kid short if need be.

* Jumin was...surprised, to say the least. “Is there such a class in public schools? I’m afraid I never heard of it. I’ll ask my school if they offer it.”

* He didn’t expect the kid to stare at him wide-eyed before laughing, going as far as to wipe tears from their eyes with the way they laughed.

* “You-you’re serious?! Oh my god-I’m so sorry for messing with you dude.”

* Jumin’s refreshing innocence, his confused pout as he tilted his head this way and that, it was so different from the haughty rich-kid attitude MC was expecting, it was nearly endearing.

* The two got to talking, and something about MC’s wit, their snarkiness that was simply kindness in disguise intrigued Jumin-he couldn’t help but even smile at one of their jokes, the two bonding in the long time it took for his driver to get here.

* As a slick black limousine stopped right in front of his schools’ gates however, a chauffer coming out with an umbrella in hand to escort Jumin to the car, it was like a bucket of cold water washed over MC-of course, as cute as the dude might’ve been, he was still a rich koid, someone from a completely different world than theirs.

* For Jumin however, this brief encounter would mark him. He’d been unable to get MC’s face out of his mind for weeks thereafter, and everytime he dreamt of encountering them again he’d wake up with a furious blush on his cheeks, even daydreaming of them in class.

* But well time passes, and the feelings faded-although they never completely left, not with someone like Jumin, who’s been unable to feel that thumping in his heart ever since that day.

* MC coming into the RFA was like a silly rom-com film where the fated couple meets again decades later as changed people-and well, it kind of went exactly like one of those films would hahah

-send me a mystic messenger headcanon or prompt-

#mystic messenger #asks #fanfics #mysme #mysme fanfics #jumin han #yoosung kim #hyun ryu #mysme zen #mysme prompts #jaehee kang #mystic messenger prompts #mystic messenger headcanons #mysme headcanons #childhood au #au #mysme au #mysme v #jihyun kim

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