#and right after that she says this

[stonerzelda]

WELL I got an interview for a marketing position tomorrow morning soooo 🤞

#whats getting me too is she called me a liar and cut me off and Woukdnt fckin listen to me abt some shit i was Trying to explain #that i literally havent bothered defending myself about so far bc i knew it would just cause problems. and when i Finally was about to try #i get cut off and called a liar because she “could tell” by MY FACE????? #like she gave me the opportunity to explain something and cut me off before i finished bc in her mind the answer was i just didnt think? #meanwhile it was bc the coworker she wanted me to talk to..who was already giving me shit...is impossible to approuch LOL #and right after that she says this #girl.

[hailsatanacab]

A Persuasive Argument - dpxdc

"Great!" Danny says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention. The dinner table falls silent as everyone looks towards him. It's a full house today and, honestly, Danny's a little nervous. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."

"It's dinnertime. In our house." Duke mutters, while doing a very bad job of concealing his yawn. He holds his fork poised over the braised beef, but, just like everyone else, still looks towards Danny before tucking in. It's intriguing enough to wait.

"Yeah, no one misses Alfie's dinner." Dick says, with a brilliant smile that Danny can't help but return.

"Precisely! What better time to talk to you all than when you're all actually here!"

"Wait, I thought you came round to work on our English essays?" Tim asks, blinking owlishly.

"I'm afraid I've lured you here under false pretences, Tim."

"This is where I live."

"I would still really appreciate help on that essay though, I mean, what the hell is Hamlet even about? I just don't get that old time-y language, like 'Hark! A ghost hath killed me!' - absolute rubbish, what does that even mean?"

"The ghost never kills anyone in Hamlet, he's there to tell Hamlet that he was murdered. Have you actually read it?"

"No, but it sounds like you have. Tim, I want this guy to help me with my essay instead. I know for a fact that you haven't read Hamlet, either."

"So? We don't need Jason, I've read the Sparknotes."

"Hi Jason, I'm Danny, pleasure to meet you, summarise Hamlet in three sentences or less."

"Am I auditioning to help you write your essays? I can't believe you’ve gone through your whole school life without reading it, it’s good!"

"Hamlet, along with a number of other classics, was banned in our house because it portrayed ghosts as intelligent and sympathetic beings rather than evil, animalistic beasts. I didn’t even get to see The Muppet's Christmas Carol until last year with Tim! It was surprisingly good, and I hate Christmas because everyone always argued and it sucked. But we're getting off topic. I—"

"No, no, please go back to that, because what the fu—"

"Boys, please." Bruce interrupts, looking to the world as if he wants to hang his head in his hands. "Danny, you were about to say something?"

"Oh, yeah, Mr. Wayne! Thanks!"

"Please, call me Bruce."

"Well, that very succinctly brings me to my point, because I'd actually really like to call you dad."

Nobody says a word. Nobody even blinks, all as shocked as the other, watching open-mouthed as Danny pulls his laptop out from beside his chair. Bruce can definitely feel a headache coming on.

"Before you say anything, I've prepared a 69 slide PowerPoint presentation on why you, Bruce Wayne, should adopt me, Danny Last-Name-Pending. Please save your questions, comments, and verdict until the end, thank you."

#dpxdc #batpham #i forget - can we tag the parent fandoms? w/e #immediately alfred's like: while i do appreciate your initiative may i suggest it wait until after dinner? #and danny - who has barely eaten proper homecooked food ever - takes one bite and then absolutely wolfs down the whole lot #after he's finished he's like 'bear with - I've got to add that to the 'Reasons I Would Like to Live Here' section' #danny's powerpoint has tailored sections for each batfam member with lists of reasons why they'd get along #my au thoughts on this is that the fentons disowned danny when he told them he was phantom #and that this is after the ultimate enemy - wherein which he allied himself with the JL to fight against dan #(which didnt really work at all - BUT he knows some of their identities now INCLUDING batman's) #so one of the main reasons why he'd be a great fit is that he knows their vigilante status anyway so they don’t need to worry about secrets #dick just turns to tim like 'he’s your friend. he learnt this from you.' #tim: 'i didn't tell him our identities!! i would never!!' #dick: 'no i know that. it's the stalker tendancies. it's baby tim all over again' #tim: scandalised gasp #they all eat dinner in silence just super subdued and in shock and sending glances to bruce and danny #duke like: 'so i know I'm the last one in the family but like... this isn't how it normally happens right? did any of you make powerpoints? #tim gets all shifty because he absolutely did make a powerpoint he just never actually showed it to anyone #everyone stares at tim because they all know. it was in one of bab's blackmail files she has on him #damian's slide has danny offering to throw down at any time. 'tim says you like to prove yourself with your skills? #how about a real challenge? if i beat you then you have to vote yes to adopting me!' #damian is in two minds about accepting because... 1) look at him damian could take danny in his sleep! but #2) on the off chance that he does win... damian does not want any more brothers #(he takes the bet and its a suprisingly fun fight - and while he'll never say this... he would vote yes even without the wager) #on one of danny's slides there's a picture of ellie: you'll also get my clone sister! two children for the price of one!! #uhhh.... thats it now - I've been having fun with this haha #spent all day with the 'ive lured you here under false pretences' 'danny i live here' line in my head haha #anyway enjoy!!!!!! this was fun #i wanna make these slides so bad

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...

#the song is 'in your eyes' by peter gabriel #boombox serenade lets GO!!! #in my mind immediately after this the others came over to say hi (or in sallys case tell him off) #and at first howdy's like 'oh ofc wallys there that makes sense. sally too? strange but alright' #then eddie appears and ohhhh boy its Jealousy Central Babey and howdy's train just pulled into the station #scribble salad #laughingstock #welcome home #barnaby x howdy #howdy x barnaby #OK CONTEXT I PROMISED CONTEXT #so in my mind howdy is an oblivious dumbass when it comes to his own romantic feelings. #he's so in love with barnaby (its very obvious) but Doesnt Realize It. despite being a god tier flirty fruity motherfucker #so when barnaby - thinking theyre on the same page - confesses #howdy's all like 'ohhh um. gee barn im flattered truly but - i just dont like you like that' #yk breaking barnaby's heart right down the middle #so barnaby shuts himself in his home and wally is hovering. yk Worried #and eddie - who's been helping barnaby come to terms w/ his own feelings & gauge if howdy feels the same - asks sally to check in for him #& sally goes over and Immediately involves herself. she takes personal offense on barnaby's behalf #also she lives for the drama and wants every juice detail Hot Off The Press #so while howdy is having a lil crisis as he slowly realizes Oh My Fucking God I DO Love Barnaby Like That- #barnaby / sally / wally / (eventually) eddie are all having a sleepover where they just play card games and chat #a good ol bitch n' stitch night #and howdy shows up to try and talk to barns (obvs in my head he doesnt have a boombox he just Knocks) #only to get RE-RE-RE-REJECTEDDDDDD!!!! thats how it feels you wormy mf! #bc barnaby is a) having a girls night & b) needs to emotionally prepare for That conversation #aaaaand THATS the context <3

[titsthedamnseason]

the front half of the album is so depressing and then halfway through it’s like she realizes wait why am i depressed. i am taylor motherfucking swift

#NOT TO SAY THE LATTER HALF ISNT ALSO EMOTIONALLY DESTRUCTIVE #ALSO THIS IS AFTER ONE LISTEN PLEASE DONT TRY TO CORRECT ME RIGHT NOW ITS NOT THAT SERIOUS #she just goes from self loathing to getting so cocky and i love it #mine #taylor swift

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Get Souped!

#poorly drawn mdzs #better drawn mdzs #mdzs #jiang yanli #I'm back! #She would never say 'get souped idiot' but I like to imagine JC and WWX would say it to each other if the other got sick and needed soup #JYL would never throw soup without knowing full well you would be able to catch it #She would rather fall face first than drop a bowl of soup after tripping. #She’s been hard at work preparing this soup! And all of you get to have some B*) Thanks for all the support while I was on break! #‘was your break relaxing op?’ unfortunately it was like being kicked down several flights of stairs. Didn't draw much sadly #Though I did end up writing a little mdzs fic! I haven’t written anything in a long while but it was fun. Maybe I'll post it....maybe... #regardless of all this rambling; thank you for all the kind messages. ill try and reply soon! #i have a few more fun doodles before I'm ready to crack into season 2! #Enjoy the soup in the mean time! #(PS: I know that's not the right hand shape for the meme redraw but augh...the OG hand angle was...way too hard to draw). #edit: retagged as better drawn mdzs. I put a lot into this one

[firestorm09890]

Penny stardewvalley makes me so sad because she's SO sensitive to, like, basically everything you tell her (telling her that you can't stand children while two children are nearby is a pretty lousy move but -1500 friendship?? being a jerk to other characters' faces typically loses you about 50 points, and if you choose the option labeled "creepy" and ask Leah for a kiss in her 2 heart event she physically hits you and kicks you out of her house but that's only -100 friendship…) and so if you want to befriend her it's a whole lot of lying and tiptoeing around her feelings (2 hearts: George was right but saying that makes her feel bad. 6 hearts: her food sucks but even if you try to be polite about it she feels like a failure; only a bald-faced lie pleases her. 8 hearts: saying you don't want to be tied down with a family loses you a little bit of friendship and she's only happy if you say you want kids) and I can't help but think she's a product of her environment. She lives in a trailer with only her mother, who gets drunk every night and has something of a temper. Penny's like a skittish rescue animal who won’t even come out from hiding under something unless you leave her lots of treats

#stardew valley #penny sdv #I didn't mention the SECOND opportunity to lose 1500 friendship with her #because I think if you go out of your way to date her and then tell her that you don't like her that way then you deserve it #but yeah she's super volatile #i was upset for a little bit after reading that one post saying the ‘right’ answer in the 2 heart event is ableist #like nooooo not my favorite farming game :( #except that in the context of several other things in the game it becomes clear that winning someone over #does not always mean doing the right thing #looking directly at how the easiest way to befriend shane and pam is by enabling their alcoholism #which is framed as a harmful thing even if the characters themselves like it #you have to lie to befriend other characters too like with sam dropping his egg #and you can lose a little friendship based on preferences like sebastian asking about what books you like #though to be fair if i saw someone who could potentially be cool and i found out that what they like was stuff im not into id also #lose interest a little #anyway those are all examples spread around on different characters #penny's got it all at once #me post

[homielander]

shiv's motivations for voting to pass the gojo deal are so layered and i don't think they should be dismissed in favour of any one interpretation. shiv desperately grabbed on to a lifeline for her relationship with tom. shiv was the deciding vote and she couldn't bear to hold the crown only for a moment just to place it atop her brother's head. shiv knew she would have more influence as wife of CEO rather than sister of CEO. shiv absolutely hated seeing kendall crystallize into logan before her eyes, especially when he made roman bleed ("and if we did kill him we get to go to bed") -- succession has always been about siblings so of course she tried to free her brothers before her child. shiv still thinks she can raise her child with all the material benefits of being the daughter of waystar CEO while doing better by her, whatever that means. and all of those things are true

#shiv roy #succession #succession spoilers #ok i'm sleeping #wait i know i just assumed tomshiv baby is a girl but like. i'm right #also i have seen many people say shiv did it purely out of spite and i will say #i don't think they would have had dialogue about shiv saying she's tired and they should all rest #or panned to shiv looking at roman's face fresh with blood #or shown shiv tearing up over her conversation with tom at the beginning of the episode #or had her say 'i cannot stomach you' which has pretty obvious connotations even in the context of succ #or had shiv make up her mind precisely when kendall said the andrew dodds confession was a lie #if her motives weren't meant to be read as ambiguous. they would not have put those things in there without reason #shiv leaving the room may have been impulsive spite but what came after was more complicated #it's also not even wholly altruistic it's just cold admittance that they don't have It. she thinks she does #and i'm not sure why the sentiment that they can't take it but she can surprises anyone #she's literally always seen herself as the exception

[trappednyourheart]

The wrong DNA test

( what if, Sheila wasn't really Jason's mother? The system is already corrupted, then what about the test?).

A huge brawl containing every rogue had started at the time of Halloween, causing the people from downtown to fled there home's as joker had clownized the whole neighborhood with his goon's.

Every bats had taken to groups to take out the three parts of Gotham's as the rogue's had started to make alliances, some had lasted quite long while had conflicts, and causing a big damage to Arkham asylum,

It didn't take long before they captured all of them, none of the bats questions as they observed Jason glowing green eyes starting to flick, they thought it was the pit again, growing wary of the cooperation, but Crime alley was involved and that mean business to Red hood's turf.

Catherine todd love her son as her own even if not biological, Jason knew that. But her thing with drugs couldn't make her stop.

Sometimes after that, they could hear Jason humming a tune,a nice melody from Damian's statement saying that Jason muttered to him “ lullaby” as Jason continued to read his book, maybe it could be from Catherine,

they knew how Jason's past with Catherine todd, his mom even if not related, Catherine loves her son like her own kid but her doing drugs and... overdosing couldn't be stop.

Maybe Jason just remembered his mother maybe reminiscing atleast something familiar...even if it was a bad time.

Jason had constantly have been hearing a woman's? Man's? Voice, singing him a lullaby...it soothing, like as if he known and loved this melody...and that's where the dreams kept coming, there was a person, giving him kisses, Talkin to him stories, singing him lullabies and soothing him, he could dream that he was actually a baby, a baby from a normal couple, well don't count the luxurious baby room.

Jason had took out a conspiracies why he was getting this dreams, ( he swears he's not becoming Tim) and voices, maybe like a misshapen memories from the pits of victims? No it's to peaceful for that, maybe magic? He already contacted Constantine but surely hang up after knowing who it was-

Just how is he getting this dreams? Unless it wasn't.... So he proved again his point, he started a DNA test, again but none had records...of Sheila being his biological mother...that was weird, last time he had a test was from the time as robin..and before his-

So he went to that hospital who had said where Sheila had given birth to him, and most of shock is that no one knows a mother giving birth named Sheila haywood but had a document of a baby, of one Jason jay nightingale, the most believing part was that it's the same day he was born in.

His mother, Daniel F. Nightingale was said to be trans as the doctor who help his mother safely delivered him, And saying that his mother loved him,

one Sheila Haywood had the constant trick to get him and taken him as his own, because his mother's family was a wealthy one they practically sold him to her.

Jason had thought that maybe his mother's family never wanted him to have a son with a man from Gotham's crime alley.

Meanwhile Danny had just been YEETED to the DC universe before the start of Batman's justice thing and had been adopted by a very wealthy fruit loops couple as there kid, so he stayed as the couples daughter even pretending, because he owed ghost writer a favor for the last time, and as DC universe exist so it's story, and one thing for sure the child he had to give birth in this universe has a very complicated fate,

he did the one night stand from his supposed friend Willis Todd? He had to befriend him as Dalia F. nightingale the supposed Wealthy daughter who fell in love with a peasant trope, and gotten pregnant making it a scandal, and reaching to his ‘parents’ circle and getting that drama.

But he never thought he would care for his child, his little jay, his ghost side would purr in delight when they held Jason, he was a very hard sucker especially from his pacifier or his breast, it's so weird being in a women body,

but the way his ‘parents’ sold his son to the women who was supposed to get his son killed and being revived by cheap parody ass of ectoplasm.

He went feral, he had an argument to his ‘parents’ but all fell deaf ears, he couldn't find his son in one of the hotels nearby where that BXtch was.

And that time was where his part of the script was fulfilled, ghost writer already took him, both sides of his, were angry.

He. will. get. his. baby. back.

#dcxdp #Danny phantom #dcxdp crossover #Mom!Danny #Batfam #Jason todd #portraits #When the bats find this they decided to help find Jason's Mom only to find out she went missing #his Jay Nightingale now #yes- im getting of topic #so lets just say that clockwork has also has some things involved with his #dcdp #batfam #and ghostwriter #so if this doesn't go to your timeline aus or smth or cannon idk what to say #when the bats found out about Jason's investigation to find his mother #they gladly help but after finding where jason's grandparents who sold him to Haywood #they meet with them #and the whole revealed was much more depressing because His mother died/missing/suicide #Ghost writer was the one who plan the...The death scene. #so jason is sad #and very much wants his momma #because thats how ghost parents shit is right? #yeah i dont think im educated enough #So the grandparents are like grieving for there son (yes they accepted his trans btw). #and let jason and the rest of the batfam in there manor/castle ( cause there seriously old money) and introduce jason to his mom's things #portraits of danny #telling stories of danny in his youth. #but they avoided the way he ‘died’ for ghost writers plot conveniences but they mention #green...like ectoplasm but they just called it green liquid.

[thecindercrow]

A League of Their Own - 1.06

#a league of their own #alotoedit #my gifs #my stuff #long post #I have a lot to learn still because these were a nightmare to light and color #but that's also just darkly lit shots for you #brighten your filming! #I need everyone seeing this who hasn't watched the show to know that this scene is played very... #well I was about to say 'straight' but that wouldn't be right #this isn't supposed to be subtextual or wink nudge wink #the scene is genuine. they are in a secret gay bar. they are blatantly flirting #after this they slow dance together and flo says jo is the most beautiful person she's ever seen #and this is just one tiny scene in this show that explores a lot of lgbt characters and relationships genuinely

[littlelightfish]

Mr. & Mrs. Folke

#they are in love #they are everything to me #they're the only canon alive couple from the manga that is happy in their marriage #and i love them so very much #yarn folke #that old woman is everything #she's so lovely #she doesn't even talk ever. the only thing she says is “oh dear” on an extra comic whrn kaka cries after the gnome festival #she is so mom #i love her #and #tansu folke #he's a grandpa #an old soul in an old body #he's the definition of old grumpy caring man #he cares so much about his sons #i love here #this couple right here #is the best of them all #fuck romance i want whatever this bitches have #and still they love each other and are happy in their marriage #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #delicious in dungeon #theyre married ik. and old af. and precious. #they're goals #my shit

[kita-shinsukes-hand-holder]

I hate you mfs that don't like Gwen after across the spider verse it smells like misogyny

#i liked her MORE after atsv #like yeah she needs to apologize to miles duh #but why is she not allowed to make mistakes without being villanized #ive heard more people talk about how bad gwen is than fucking Miguel #shes CLEARLY being influenced if not manipulated by Miguel and jess #shes only doing those things because she wants to PROTECT miles #she doesnt want what Miguel is saying to be true #like yall im p sure she fully accepted that her dad was going to die #they had to have said some shit to make her accept that #and at the end shes trying to right her wrongs #shes become such a more nuanced character than she was in the first movie #why are you guys fucking stupid #AND shes trans shes literally amazing #gwen stacy #spiderverse #spider man across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #spider gwen #marvel

[visenyaism]

would you please describe how you think the criston-aemond podcast would go.... who would the have on as guests. would they invite aegon...

so it’s supposed to be about being a high value tradseven male and how women these days desecrate the very image of the maiden and the mother by not respecting themselves. occasional tangents on knighthood, sword violence, chastity, misinterpreted intro-level philosophy, and how Visenya Targaryen could’ve conquered dorne if she had gotten instead of rhaenys. 

Criston by vows has to just be a yes man the whole time and only really engages when it’s time to call rhaenyra a cunt or talk about the virtues of not jacking off. Aemond keeps interrupting to talk about how he could totally take his uncle in a sword fight and would be a better king. Aegon was in the bonus episode that they recorded at the lucerys is dead party but none of the rest of it because he kept calling them virgins and it hurt aemonds feelings so somehow their most frequent guests are whichever member of the Green council is unfortunate enough to be in the same room, or Daeron who is just excited that one of his family members wants to spend time with him. Cregan Stark makes the lads listen to it because Aemond usually accidentally reveals where they are because they’re complaining about the scenery too much.

#the alys rivers guest episode where aemond is agreeing with everything she says right after she says it #asoiaf #hotd

[fuckmeyer]

if smeyer wasn't a coward vamp!Bella would have immediately eaten her daughter Rensesmem whole-hog like Saturn Devouring His Son

#twilight #twilight renaissance #bella swan #the twilight saga #breaking dawn #smeyer wanted to model all her books off of classic literature: romeo & juliet - wuthering heights - pride & prejudice #AMATEUR HOUR #HEY SMEYER I GOT A FUCKIN STORY TO MODEL YOUR TWILIGHT FANFICTION AFTER #BREAKING DAWN BOOK ONE: Bella fucks Edward for his power & breaks his stone dick in the process - & lo! Ravioli is born in the carnage! #Bella becomes a vamp. she takes over the Cullen coven AND the Volturi bc honestly fuck everyone here only Bella is Cool and Right #oh and vamp hybrids are now legal so vamps start gettin it on. hybrids everywhere. humans who? welcome to the Golden Age baybeeee #BD BOOK 2: Alice comes to Queen Bella with a vision: 'lmao bestie the prophecy says ur getting ur shit smacked' #oh_fuck.avi #Bella begins DEVOURING ALL THE CULLENS INCLUDING RAVIOLI so they can't fulfill the prophecy #vampire fluid contains 11 secret herbs & spices so it's lip-smackin finger-lickin good #omg but ONE vampire was hidden away........ gasp #surprise bitch! it's Ravioli! #turns out Bella mistook Ravioli for LITERAL Ravioli (Chef Boyardee Beefaroni to be exact) #Raviolo comes back and makes Bella throw up! bleh! the Cullens (& Beefaroni) are freed! #together with Benjamin Ravioli now rules over the Cullens and the vamp world #Bella is imprisoned #FUCK Bella #FUCK this story #still a better one than BD tho #the end

[aq2003]

like the important thing you must keep in mind about ten when you see him do literally anything is that he's soooooooooo so so so bad at actually isolating himself from other people. so TERMINALLY bad at it. he thinks to himself "i don't need human connection because everything i do causes pain and destruction to those around me :(" but then he experiences a crumb of human connection and his heart starts to spill out of his chest

#tenth doctor #dr who #doctor who #yeah i say heart singular cuz he said 'i suppose they break my heart' in the next doctor and i have perma brain damage over it #btw. this is why him and martha in the first half of series 3 are Like That. he trusts her deeply but he also doesn't want to form #another deep emotional connection bc look what happened with rose! right! i think partially the reason why he #has his moments of opening up about his past is because he thinks 'well she isn't going to see me again after this' #'i might as well tell her if she asks. it may even scare her off'. this is INSANE. he is INSANE. and he is so fucking STUPID #fool! you are developing a connection with someone!!!!!!! not pushing them away!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #look at what you are doing to martha's self esteem bro!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #10 era

[baeshijima]

how i felt before, during, and after the drip marketing

#just genshin <3 #i am so normal about neuvillette i swear #(<- she says like a liar.) #anyway throwing up for the nth time #beloved all my wishes will be saved for u !!! and i hope ur happy i did the picsart free trial just to make that transparent image of u 🐥 #cancelled the subscription right after i was done but i felt like i was gonna suddenly be £65.99 poorer despite it 🫡 #genshin impact #neuvillette

[deep-space-lines]

Did I hit a raw nerve? Have I got a soft touch?

fuck it. lesbian mindflayers

#my art #ultrakill #mindflayer #robot yuri. as was promised. #ended up too lazy to finish this properly but oh well #this was my way of trying to calm down after my mom said some homophobic bullshit right #except she walked into the room while i was drawing it and asked if she could see what i was drawing and got kinda mad at me when i said no #like ma’am if you saw what i was drawing you’d pass out #my girlfriend says this is the nicest ass i’ve ever drawn tho #suggestive