#and you're So fucking valid. you don't need a label and you don't need a description. you are so so so awesome and rad as hell

[mommyclaws]

Is everyone willingly ignoring it or when are we going to realize this petty label discourse has always been rooted in misogyny. This started long before Bi Lesbians. Some of you are just too new or simply never paid enough attention to realize the history of this hatred of lesbians. Do any of you remember?

First it was "Butches aren't valid" because they were invading wlw spaces with their "masculinity"

Then it was moved onto: "Trans women aren't valid" because actually they were the ones invading wlw spaces with their "masculinity" The exact same arguement being used against cis women as well.

Then "Pan/Bi women aren't valid" because your attraction to men or anyone other than a woman doesn't belong in wlw spaces.

Then it was "Nonbinary lesbians aren't valid" because if you're "not a woman" by my definition you're invading wlw spaces.

"Asexual/Aro women aren't valid" because your lack of "real" attraction to women doesn't belong in wlw spaces.

"Lesboys aren't valid" because you are invading wlw spaces with your "masculinity"

"Bi/Pan lesbians aren't valid" because your attraction to men or anyone other than a woman doesn't belong in wlw spaces.

Oh wait? Where have we heard those last two before? Wasn't everyone arguing about those SAME issues with Butches/Trans wlw and Pan/Bi wlw?

Yes, exactly. Would any of you take ONE look back and realize this is only repetition of problems we have already decided don't dictate our identities?

They say, "You're not a real lesbian unless you do this and that and even if you do that you'll never be good enough." No matter what lesbains do, there will always be a problem. Why? Because this isnt about being a lesbian, this isnt about women, this is rhetoric started by terfs and it will never be anything more.

Sure, you can follow their rules to feel valid, but you'll never be good enough. You're an invader too because they'll sprinkle in little things to feed the insecurities and rules that THEY fucking created.

You're not a real lesbian unless you're a "gold star lesbain" meaning you've never dated or been attracted to a man. You're not a real lesbian unless you're feminine. You're not a real lesbian unless you hate masculinity.

Which is just translation for: You're not a real wlw unless you hate men and don't deviate from gender norms. And, WHO would've thought! Is exactly what terfs want.

They sink their claws into the newer generations because they don't remember what our community has had to go through, all they see is the fake issues created and they think it's a threat because they're being fed "This is what's valid and this is what's not" and it seems like it's never going to end because women being anything other than passive and simple with their identities are immediately taken as a threat to the community by those who are insecure and need to demand the exclusion of anyone who doesn't follow their rules to feel like theyre part of a group.

Anti-Bi/Pan Lesbians have become sheep because they only surround themselves with online discourse instead of the real issues LGBTQ people face and in their attempt to keep a "clean community" They're more unwelcomed than the people they tell to kill themselves. So caught up in fake problems others or themslves have made up that they fail to grasp the simplest of concepts: Labels DO NOT exist in real life. Labels are created to help people describe how they feel or identify. They are not and have NEVER been a final definition.

Labels are worn HOWever and WHENever the owner feels like it. They're not collars. They're not cages. You can't use them as such. You can't use them against us.

When? WHEN? When did we decide that a label- A WORD- matters MORE than the real life feelings that real life people are experiencing?

Why did we dehumanize the ability to feel attraction and expression?

#Been wanting to say this for a long ass time. when is this going to end. why does everyone hate lesboans freedom to express andlove #lesbian #wlw #misogyny #transphobia #biphopia #panphobia #aphobia #not warriors #mspec lesbian

[citricacidprince]

Y'all need to be fucking nicer to men/masc queers

I was talking to an old friend/short lived boyfriend from highschool and the topic of sexualities came up. He identified as bisexual throughout highschool but told me that recently he doesn't know what he was and just preferred to remain 'unlabeled' until he figured it out. I told him to his face "thats valid man and being unlabeled doesn't make you any less queer than when you were labeled"

God you should've seen his fucking face, he looked so happy and also like he was about to goddamn cry. He told me that no one ever told him that. That he tried to join queer spaces but they said he didn't fit in cause he wasn't 'gay' enough. Told me that I was the first person to ever confidently tell him he was queer and that he didn't need to change himself to 'fit in'.

I gave my friend one of my mini pride flags I had lying around and the dopey grin he had on his face while waving that thing around for the rest of the night made me smile too. When he finally went home he thanked me for the flag and for reassuring him when he felt insecure for 'not being gay enough'.

I want y'all to know that whole time he telling me about people not accepting him for "not looking queer" made me fucking pissed. Oh, because he's not petite, feminine, and white he can't be queer? Because he doesn't look like a fashionable and conventionally pretty gay on you'd find on your TikTok homepage he can't be queer?

THIS ISN'T EVEN THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THIS CONVERSATION WITH A FRIEND BEFORE

In highschool I had ANOTHER friend who had this same problem but in a different font. He liked cute things, he liked flowing fabrics and skirts, he even liked being called princess! But because he was fat and not conventionally attractive he felt like he couldn't be queer. Because from what he saw, queer people don't look like him.

If you're one of those people who would gatekeep ANYONE who doesn't fit into your Pinterest board ideal version of queer from the LGBTQ+ community, you can fuck right off because anyone who would just shut of someone out of our community for something so petty and dumb and ignorant doesn't deserve the keys to the fucking door in the first place.

Start treating people who don't fit into your saturated and commercialized view of queer with more respect and kindness before I start biting off your fucking arms

#i made this at like 7am cause i was in am anger spiral so theres probably spelling errors but i cant be bothered to check them #this has been nawing at my brain for days now and i dont get it one paper its gonna kill me #im not gonna tag this with 'que slur' or whatever you guys are tagging it now cause its not a slur stop treating it like its one #its an umbrella term for the whole gay community and i will smack you witb a broom of all you take from this is 'oh you said a slur 😶' #i will attacka and killa you dont test me #im not normally this violent i swear; i just get violent when people start upsetting my friends #lgbt #lgbtq+ #lgbtq positivity #masc enby #masculine enby #masc nonbinary #queer #queer representation #queer community #tw cursing #tw swearing #tw arguing #tw aggressive #prince rambles in this chilies tonight #lgbtqia #nonbinary #non bianry #enby #amab nonbinary #amab enby #prince's gold star posts

[vaspider]

just a heads up that that post abt ppl reconnecting is by a like. meeeega z*onist. i usually am like eh ppl dont need to check usernames for everyone they reblog but for that one since its like. relatatef to an extent to the post i wanted to let you know for you and the people who follow u! i hope u are having whatever the best day for ur circumstances is

You're not Jewish, by your own admission. I went to make sure, before I started talking. You have some Jewish heritage, and you might look at converting, but you're not Jewish, so let's start there. And I am going to be as patient as I possibly can under the circumstances.

You have essentially just walked into the living room of a family that you're not a part of and said, "that thing that was just said about connecting with this family that I'm not a part of? You should not listen to it because it came from a term that those of us outside this family have rendered meaningless by overuse and abuse. You should not interact with that person because I am telling you they're a Bad one of y'all, because I've determined this word is Bad, and everyone has beaten it into the ground."

How do you think that would go, if you walked into my living room and pointed at someone there, as a complete and total stranger, and said, 'you should take my value statement about one of the people in your extended family'? Do you think it would go well, whether or not I agreed with that family member, that you've interjected yourself into intrafamily discussions, especially intrafamily discussions about our family's emotional survival and connection?

Because that's what this is, to be clear. Those people? They are my family. You just came in off the street and said, "Take my word on your family. They're bad. You shouldn't interact with them."

What's more, one of the two people you're pointing at, the only two people who spoke on that post, is someone who was present, and indeed the sole official witness, at a moment in my life which rates in terms of joy and personal meaning right up there with my wedding and the moment the midwife placed my daughter, naked and screaming, on my belly. You just came in to my living room and said, "The person who witnessed your mikveh immersion seven years ago? Bad. Take it from me, person who has never spoken to you before."

Do you also walk into drag shows, point at the person on the stage, and yell, "That's a groomer!"? Because that's basically what y'all sound like when you do this: you're coming in from the outside, wielding a word you've effectively rendered meaningless against people who belong here.

I'm real fucking tired of -- literally every time I interact with any post about Jewishness at all -- someone lunging in to tell me that There Be Bad Jews, or demanding that, because I am interacting with members of my family, I answer a bunch of fucking "when did you stop beating your wife" questions.

That was literally just in the last 24h. One post about how Judaism survives because we reconnect with each other, one post about how American institutions like Chabad are being labeled 'Israeli' as a means of smearing them. Literally dealing with living as a fucking Jew in the diaspora is now simply Not Allowed To Be Spoken Of, apparently, unless I strictly validate that everyone in the thread is not a Bad Bad Zionist, which of course applies to every Jew who says something we don't like, regardless of their repeatedly-stated values or self-identification.

It's almost like the end point of all of that is Jews simply not talking about being Jewish anywhere that they might be seen by someone who doesn't like that. If we can only speak about being Jewish if our Judaism meets the strict, ever-changing ethical purity standards of a bunch of Puritan-descended American leftists, then we can't speak about our lives at all, can we?

Funny, that.

Anyway, you have self-declared Zionists in your last 30 reblogs, so like, if you want to spend time endlessly policing someone's blog, make it your own.

Nobody ever send me asks like this ever again. This is the last one I'll even vaguely humor.

#reblogs are off #behave

[proudproship]

im a survivor of a lot of the stuff some proshippers ship in fiction and I unironically feel safer around proshippers than I do antis.

Antis don't give a fuck about us. And the moment a proshipper reveals they're a victim of horrible things suddenly they deserve it. Over FANDOM DISCOURSE.

Fuck that, NO ONE deserves that.

Stop treating real people like fictional characters and stop treating fictional characters like real people for your "activism."

I don't really use either label publicly because I don't feel the need to, but I'm sick and tired of people's priorities caring more about fictional scenarios than survivors.

Sorry, I had to rant about this somewhere

You're free to rant all you want in my inbox dw, and honestly it's such a mood

I'm a survivor too and holy SHIT do I feel validated around proshippers

When I considered myself an anti, I had to hide my "not so pretty" symptoms, like hypersexuality and paraphilia... and hiding it made it WAY worse... and ofc the antis got mad that it got worse lmao

Anyways, I'm super glad you feel safe around us, and just know that you'll always be safe here. 💛

#Opening Inbox #proship #anti harassment #profic #comship #proship safe #anti anti #tw antiship

[thesherrinfordfacility]

it's all well and good to have discourse regarding generalised theories and meta and such like, it's cool to discuss and (politely) debate stuff; maybe you can change other fans' minds by sharing your perspective/analysis, or maybe they can change yours.

what's not cool though? screenshotting actual posts (that can easily be found on a straightforward google boolean search, or hell - usually just by typing the contents into tumblr itself) of takes you don't agree with and subjecting them to focused ridicule. those are someone's thoughts and feelings. that is someone's time, their effort, and their dedication.

what's not cool is vagueing about people's posts in such a way that it is obvious that your post is about them, about that particular post, and not just the theory/theme in general. this fandom is huge but it's also incredibly small sometimes - we're all so often of the same mind that art and fic and meta pass through us like shockwaves. what im saying is that the person that that post is about? they'll probably see it. don't be bullies. a good portion of us have had enough of bullies to last us a lifetime, and it's not needed here.

reblog a post and disagree courteously, patiently, and with compassion, or make a separate post "ive seen discussion on this theme/thought, and whilst it was interesting, i personally don't agree and here's why...". send a polite ask to the op perhaps asking them to clarify some things, because you don't agree but at least want to understand and discuss, if they'd be amenable.

if the bad takes are becoming too much, or are upsetting you, or the person is doubling down despite polite debate and it's pissing you off? that's absolutely valid and you're allowed to feel like that - and if you don't want, or can't, address it politely, and it's too much... block them. block them so you don't have to keep seeing it. rant about it in the DMs to someone you trust if you really need to, but don't publicly make people - on what is (to my mind) the mostly inclusive and open-minded platform - feel like shit because they see media different than you.

don't make people feel like they're absolute scum just because you disagree. don't make them feel stupid, or close-minded. dont stick labels on them that they will likely internalise and make them feel like the worst human being to walk the earth. it's humiliating, it's alienating, and it's going make some people fear having any interest in something they used to enjoy, and that once brought them joy when they needed it most. you personally may not be bothered, but others might - have some respect for them.

god knows im not perfect and ive done it myself, im not pretending otherwise bc sometimes i catch myself being unkind, or feeding into this culture of "different thought = wrong thought", but by god im trying to do better. don't be like me, please please please just be fucking kind

[sirenium]

This started off as a multigender rant but includes other things, because I'm so pissed off at the queer community for these things that I need to fit it all in one post. Sit back and prepare for this, it's a long read (also feel free to scroll past) being multigender sucks because I feel too paradoxical to be taken seriously. It doesn't help that I'm also agender :/ Like yeah, identity is your own and you shouldn't shave off parts of it to appease others, but damn does the 'passive' hostility and invalidation towards multigender people such as myself make me feel pushed towards changing myself sometimes. You can scream into the void all you want about being normal about multigender people and how they label their experiences, but some people just... never will be. That's what it feels like, from the fucking queer community as well as cishet society. It sucks. I can never be comfortable to explore my womanhood because then my manhood and agenderhood will never be taken seriously. Hell, the fact that I simultaneously experience gender AND being genderless is enough for people to just shit on me and exile me from queer spaces. The fact that I prefer ze/hir and it/its and nounself pronouns is enough for people to call me one of the bad ones. AND, the fact that I am more comfortable being perceived as a man suddenly makes me a 'danger to women'. There are so many issues with how multigender people, neurodivergent queers (literally any kind of neurodivergent, not just the neopronoun xenogender autistic person), queer POC, the list goes on are treated; if you aren't a white woman god help you, god forbid you're a man in any way either. And don't even get me started about how aroace people are fucking treated. I could go on for another few paragraphs about how I, as someone who is aroace spec and a plethora of other things, don't feel safe sometimes. I could go on and on and on. And fuck it, I will (under the cut because this post is already comically long):

'Aroace is a spectrum' this, 'all aroaces are valid' that, until you're romance/sex oscillating or even favorable, until you're polyamorous, until you're also a lesbian or a gay person or m-spec. Even in the fucking aroace community you're held by some bar of being aroace enough, and if you diverge even slightly god forbid. Allo fictives of aroace characters, hell even those who are aroace in a different way, have to listen to the incessant whining of the 'stop making sexual/romantic fiction of this character! they're repulsed in canon!' crowd. It's fucking obnoxious. Aroace people are already not taken seriously, aroallos and alloaces are already not taken seriously, and then you have the clown parade of people forcing their own idea of what they want you to be down your throat. The queer community and its many facets feel so fucking unsafe at times, and that sucks because we're all we've got. Some people don't have supportive family or connections outside of online queer spaces, and this is what they get. It's so incredibly shitty. I don't feel aroace enough because of my experiences, despite also having very stereotypical aroace experiences. I feel forced to constantly be sex/romance averse at times because again, god forbid you're ever favorable. I have two partners, okay? I have partners who I don't necessarily 'love' but care about a lot, and then I have to come across things that erase the fact that I am quite often averse to sex and romance because of this fact! People like me are constantly erased, and when they're represented in fiction people throw a hissy fit. "Oh you're forcing an aroace character into allonormativity!" Hey asshole: maybe, just maybe, aroace people can date just as much as they aren't required to. Fucking. Jesus. Some community this is, for there to be so much exclusion and hatred and segregation.

#queer #multigender #agender #transgender #lesboy #turigirl #gaybian #neurodivergent queer person #xenogender #neopronouns #nounself #androphobia #aroace #aroallo #alloace #fictive

[blinkpen]

raggle frabble

how are there self-declared progressive people Still using that one "yes" meme format like you cannot reclaim that one nor should you want to, the antisemitic white supremacist eugenics trash is Baked In, and that does not go away by just having the topic be something goofy and non-political? bc the meme format itself is so aggressively political? you can't actually make the Hitler Particles on it go away by just editing it to have "yes" guy say something woke, despite what people seem to think? and every time i see a variation of it i have to do a background check to make sure whoever thought it was funny to post is not just literally an actual fascist hiding behind memes? because that's literally how their dogwhistle meme shit is Supposed to work? bc now its everywhere and nobody thinks anything of it at all, except people who now have to wonder if someone posting this crap indicates true genocidal malice hiding itself, or just irony-poisoned dipshittery helping them hide

i thought we covered this years ago and i'm baffled it still hasn't quite gone away??? some of you guys really, really, really, wanted to use dogwhistles for.................. fun? i guess? alright. are you an asshole, or...?

or do we like? need to explain? again??? what it is you're doing? when you "reclaim" that particular meme? because what you're doing is this:

"here's a meme where i labeled you the ugly person who is drooling or upset with a weak chin and dark hair and beady eyes probably can't get laid (traits clearly indicating a person is slugbrained histrionic & wrong, with no further elaboration even needed as to why their opinion should be ignored, bc isn't it obvious why? look at what they are!) now, as you can see, the contrast is important, as i labeled myself as the handsome stoic white person with blonde hair and blue eyes and i will have NO trouble passing on my visibly aryan genes because i'm a gigachad who fucks (traits clearly indicating i'm enlightened and correct with no further elaboration needed as to why my opinion can be assumed to be objectively correct, bc isn't it obvious? look at what i am!). hahaha! take that! i love reclaiming neonazi memes rooted in fascist logic to even work for my own political purposes! because it's all about feeling like i was the one to turn a weapon against its master, finally wielding its power rather than examining it, how it works, and ultimately discarding it as a loathsome tool i don't need if trying to accomplish anything good. because i am very progressive, and a comedy genius also."

that is what that meme format is, from the ground up.

people should not be utterly indifferent about letting it remain in their communal repertoire for self-expression for any random opinion no matter how serious or trivial? if ~irony~ isn't a good excuse for an actual neonazi to be let off the hook for implicitly asserting the validity of eugenics in a public forum for dissemination, why is it an excuse for anyone else, exactly?

oh right.

i forgot how many people on here are white goy with white guilt that they want to be free of feeling the sting of ever again without ever truly confronting their own internalized racism, or their internalized sense of innate superiority that they clearly still ache to demonstrate to themselves and their peers via public displays of social humiliation and mockery of those deemed too Undesirable of Body and they especially don't want to ever confront the ways those things manifest when they genuinely think they're on to something good or funny and sticking it to somebody who 'deserves it'

#hold on i need to rant/vent about a meme i hate that refuses to die for some reason #2b delete l8r maybe #cw for mentinos of antisemitism racism nazis etc im bitching about people 'ironically' using nazi memes to 'reclaim' them #and just. giving what is already a dogwhistle MORE Plausible Deniability armor/smokescreen making the issue Worse actually. #thanks! i hate it! can you Stop?

[ramshacklefey]

Wait. Back up. So there's like. A significant difference between the way you feel about your dearest friends/family, and the way you're supposed to feel about a romantic partner, and it isn't "I wanna fuck you stupid" OR "co-dependent attachment based on my low self-esteem and desire for outside validation from someone I think is better than me"?

And this third thing is what you're supposed to base your choice of romantic partners on. And losing it is an immense tragedy that is grounds for ending a relationship, even if you remain compatible for continuing your life projects together in all other ways.

It is also, while not being some kind of co-dependent attachment, grounds for not being able to be friends with someone if they don't feel the same way about you.

And we aren't just randomly putting a label on something and elevating it because it helps reinforce cishet-patriarchal relationship ideals.

Are we sure about this? Can anyone describe it to me? Is it in the room with us right now?

"I get nervous and excited when I'm around them," doesn't everyone feel that way when they really want someone else to like them?

"I feel like my life won't be complete if they don't form a certain kind of relationship with me," is that not co-dependent attachment?

"I really really love them and want to have sex with them," those are two separate things, why is there something magical about both of them happening at once?

"I want to live with them for the rest of my life," because you get along well, have shared values and compatible life projects, and your financial needs/desires are similar?

"I want to raise kids with them," because you have a shared set of goals as parents and your other goals and projects mesh well with that. Right? Right?

"I want to breed with them," well now you're just telling me more than I wanted to know about your fetishes.

#ramshackle life #no really someone please explain #am I just totally fucked up by my relationship history or are all the rest of you nuts?

[cloudycleric]

tl;dr for my bi vs gay mike truthers video

basically, summarized, through my own research ive concluded... mike wheeler is....

unlabeled!!

i don't think the whole bi vs gay mike truthers thing needs to be a thing. like i dont get why it was ever as controversial as it was. you can very much interpret the first few seasons of stranger things through the lens that mike wheeler did in fact have a crush on el. or, you can support the theory that neither of them had a crush on each other, but mike felt a sort of comp-het impulse to have a crush on el. whichever theory you support is fine.

but, (if you believe this) just because mike never had a crush on el doesn't mean he can't be bisexual, mike could very well be gay as well & only experience attraction to men, but honestly, who cares! i don't think we need to force a label onto mike if the show doesn't want to give him one (yet, if they do in s5, i will update this).

being a bi mike truther doesn't erase mike's obvious queerness, & being a gay mike truther doesn't make you biphobic. it's just not how it works. at the end of the day, mike wheeler is queer in some way shape or form whether he chooses to identify as gay, bisexual, unlabeled, or whatever the fuck he wants.

i'm learning different styles of literary theory & criticism in my english classes right now, & i think something that they said in the class about criticism & theory about writing (& various forms of media, it doesn't just have to apply to writing) is that criticism & theory helps us see stories & interpret things in an infinite number of ways, & i think that's really nice. the only problem is when people start declaring their theories as true.

i've fallen into this, i'm sure a lot of bylers have, into the over analysis train. as much as i love theorizing about byler, looking at the cinematography & writing & editing & lighting & whatever, at the end of the day, we're all just theorizing based on the evidence that is presented to us. just because a light shines on will doesn't necessarily mean that mike sees him as his sunshine & true love, but we can definitely theorize that that's what it means! & after byler is confirmed canon in s5, (or god forbid it's not), we can finally have a resting answer to our theories. but again, a story is a story, you can still have theories about it even if the show is over.

it's your choice whether or not you want bi/gay mike truthers to interact with your page, it's your social media experience & you should be able to tailor it to how you see fit. the only thing i get upset about is the fighting over it. i just think the whole super heated debate about it is a bit silly.

anyway, that's my two cents. this was longer than what i thought it was gonna be & honestly more comprehensive than the video, so. i hope this makes sense. if you're a gay mike truther, you're valid. if you're a bi mike truther, you're valid. if you're an unlabeled mike truther, your valid. if you're using your analysis & theories as facts & as justification to be mean to others over the internet, you are in fact NOT valid.

#byler #stranger things #mike wheeler #bi mike truther #gay mike truther #bi mike wheeler #gay mike wheeler #byler analysis

[the-beaten-and-the-damned]

okay, let's talk radqueers this time. them and endos seem to overlap to some extent, and it just so happens we find both stupid and downright offensive.

trigger warning not needed, it's a radqueer post, radqueers themselves are a topic to be avoided. yet, here we are.

you see, we're a student. we go to a big and pretty high ranking university to study translation and interpreting. and it just so happens that there's a lot of students of different ethnicities, races, speaking different languages and having different cultures. and there's also a lot of disabled people too. that one red haired guy that has severe bone deformities and neurological conditions, who can't stand up from his wheelchair, but keeps going to the university because of his will to keep on learning - shout-out to you, you're amazing and inspiring.

anyway, radqueers. those beautiful (sarcasm) trans-racial, trans-abled people... genuinely, what the fuck.

knock it off. you can't just say you were meant to have cerebral paralysis and asperger's, and that you're also half japanese in your head. moreover you can't in all seriousness say that AND expect to be taken seriously, rather than as a troll or a fucking ableist/racist. trans-ableds, you don't know what it's like to be paralysed neck down, to be a limb short. or god, even a finger - your life can become so much harder if you lose just ONE finger. you're not valid, and you asking for accomodations for your imaginary disability is comical at best, and makes me want to pull the trigger at ourselves at worst.

trans-abled, stop taking away the accomodations other actually disabled people need to live, stop glamorising the disabilities you don't have. you're harming those people, and i'd personally make someone disabled if they told us they're transabled irl. /dramatic

trans-disordered, stop turning disorders you don't have into a joke. you're not advocating for actually disordered people, and no, the only thing you need psychiatric help for is the fact that you genuinely think it's okay to hoard labels that don't apply to you like pretty rocks or pokemon cards.

trans-racial, a special one to you. we've seen a bunch of trans-russians out there, and i'll use their example. so, i dare you. come to russia, tell a rando on the street you're actually supposed to be russian, but you weren't born one. that russian is your trans-ethnicity. best case scenario - you'll get laughed at. worst case scenario - you'll get beaten senseless. it's not a threat, because i personally would've just spat in your face. it's just what would've actually happened, we're telling you this fun fact because we know what kind of society we live in. show fucking respect to the culture, you insolent and ignorant fucks. one thing is being interested in it, exploring it, willing to know more. other is appropriating without knowing jack shit about it.

as an individual who sees people of different races and ethnicities everyday, who has people with actual disabilities and disorders around, we can't wrap our head around why some folks would want to be so fucking disrespectful to these categories. these white american kids, and we KNOW the majority of radqueers ARE white american kids, really need to log off and touch some grass. and a solid reality check in general.

BE FUCKING RESPECTFUL, OKAY? AT LEAST A TEENY TINY BIT RESPECTFUL.

#💀roadkill #anti radqueer #anti rq #fuck radqueers #anti radqueers

[sageistrii]

I'm seeing a lot of talk about rapline needing to find their audience because armys don't listen to rap music or how they want rapline to be taken seriously in the western rap community. Meaning they want them to have real solo rap careers outside of BTS and cultivate an audience that actually enjoys their work instead of stans who just stream on the first day of release because they have to, and that is valid. It is a valid thing to want even though I do think it's ironic that if the same thing is implied or said in relation to vocal line,the person who even thought to say that would be called a "diet solo". I guess if you aren't a rapper you don't deserve your own solo audience and you should be confined to BTS alone.

But the thing is, armys are funny as fuck for that take I'm sorry. Like I get it but I find the whole thing amusing. You cannot have everything, you cannot want BTS as a group to be at the forefront of these men's careers and at the same time expect some of them to cultivate listeners outside of armys or Kpop.

As sad as it is, black rap fans view Kpop a certain way as opposed to pop stans who listen to music regardless of it's language or race of the singer. Even if they could be convinced to overlook the fact that the song is in Korean or rapline decides to release songs mainly in English, they lose all credibility the minute their association with a popular Kpop group becomes known. "BTS" as a label is beneficial to them and y'all have made sure that it's the only thing they're known for because you never wanted them to have careers outside of the group, but now you're mad that they have no audience outside of armys?

And honestly waiting for western black rap fans to consider them real rappers is something that's probably never going to happen, it's not even shade, just reality. Rapline can have good rap careers without acceptance from western rap fans, there are k rappers who aren't even that good, but have dedicated listeners who like their music and they also chart well in Korea. The problem is that armys have done a great job with stifling and gate keeping the members, the BTS label is also stifling to their individual growth. The most armys should hope for right now is some TikTok miracle happening for them because as long as they continue to be "BTS" and that's the only thing they're known for, they are not gaining that solo rap audience y'all have been talking about.

And we all know y'all want BTS as a group at the detriment of their solo careers, so just cut the crap. Y'all don't actually care about how they do as soloists, in fact y'all would love for all for all of them to flop because it kills any threat to BTS as a group. What y'all hate seeing is certain members doing better than some because y'all are scared of the divide and what it could mean for bts' future, y'all know that these are the kind of things that eventually lead to some members leaving and a group breaking up.

If they were all doing poorly or if some members hadn't experienced the kind of solo success that they had and they weren't such a huge gap, y'all would not care about rapline needing their own audience.

[bunnygirllover45]

hi. this is not a question per se but more like a comment. it is completely unrelated to everything, I just wanted to say thank you. this may sound completely stupid, but I am a trans man and I suffer from chest dysphoria. I bought a binder and even though it made me feel a lot better, but I realized that my chest was not completely flat. before, I was always like "I need to have a flat chest or I die." I still have some chest volume, that is very minimal, but it is there. days passed and watching your oc (the batshit male one, I love him) not having a complete flat chest despite being a guy made me feel a lot more secure on myself.

I've seen plenty of guys that were assigned male at birth (and even ones assigned female at birth but with complete confidence even without a completely flat chest), both real life people and fictional characters, and they have made me more confident. you've helped with that, so I wanted to say thanks.

also. your art is pretty and your style is unique. don't ever stop what you're doing.

sorry for the long text. you don't have to answer this, I just wanted you to read it. I hope you have a very nice day, night, or whatever moment of the day you're on. :)

Oh dear,, this is really cute. I understand this issue a lot, I've been dealing with dysphoria too for years, no matter how much I tried I always felt like I would never feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't wanna get too personal, but I still deal with those feelings every day, sometimes I wish I wasn't born like I was. Let me tell you something anon, gender is a fucking excuse to label things for marketing purposes, you can be whoever you want. I know it's hard not to think "I shouldn't have this" or "My body should be like that" ( I deal with those thoughts often too.) just to fit an imaginary list of attributes a gender should have invented by society that doesn't understand your struggles, you feel like a man? then you're one! It's okay if you still don't like some parts about yourself, hell, I hate some of mine too; do anything that makes you feel better, that really makes you feel like you belong there, in your own body. I'm really happy my art helped you. I hope you have a very nice day too, thanks for taking the time to send me this. And remember, you're handsome! you're valid, you're doing your best, and most of all, you're you, the most genuine and beautiful form of you.

#chrona... answers things? #wish you the best

[fixing-bad-posts]

I have a genuine question, why don't people like Bi Lesbians?

hey anon, i know this has been in my inbox for a long while—i wanted to collect my thoughts properly before replying. it think it comes down to a combination of these three things—

the allure of respectability politics: the belief that if you can distance yourself from queers with uncommon, difficult-to-understand labels, you're more likely to be accepted by mainstream society. some people want to deny association with 'weird queers' to gain acceptance with biased family, friends, employers, etc.

hurt people hurt people: queerness is stigmatized, and every pocket of our community has their own unique history of trauma. labels and descriptor-words are highly personal. people are quick to anger/defensiveness about their identities, especially online, and especially when they've had to fight for their identities to be recognized. many (classical) lesbians have faced invalidation for their lesbianism. hearing mspec lesbians say things like,

"lesbians can be attracted to men (because i'm using the label to express a highly personal experience of sexuality/attraction),"

can sound a lot like hearing every asshole they've ever met say,

"lesbians can be attracted to men (so i have the right to disrespect your boundaries/deny your experiences)."

it's similar to why the ace community faces discrimination. hearing an ace person say,

"you don't need sex and/or sexual attraction to have a fulfilling relationship (therefore, i want a relationship that operates in absence of those things),"

can sound a lot like decades of homophobes saying,

"you don't need sex and/or sexual attraction to have a fulfilling relationship (so i will pressure you into a miserable, comphet marriage)."

these things are not the same, but there's this belief that bigots will see fringe queers as validation for the harm they've caused/are causing, as if they needed that validation. the thing is, the absence of fringe queers won't convince bigots not to be bigots.

non-monolithic, conflicting needs: the queer community is not a single entity. we are separated by race, class, sexuality, gender, location, etc. some queers are looking to dismantle hetero/amato/cis-normative establishments. others are fighting for their right to marry. to have sex. to raise children. to not fucking die. my speculation is that, to some queers who are fighting to be acknowledged at all, it seems offensive/unfair that there are other queers who seem to be muddying the definitions they're trying so hard to assert. we are vast. we don't need the same things, and unfortunately those things can clash.

---

this got away from me, but mostly it comes down to this fallacy that the enemy is other queers instead of bigots. it's so easy to be angry, and defensive, and judgemental, especially in times like these. but infighting will truly get us nowhere.

if it's not clear, my stance is one of radical inclusion.

#of course‚ i'm only one random queer online #my opinion is just that—no more‚ no less. #ask fbp #anon ask #queer discourse #queer #queer community

[nat-stimmy]

haii!!! actual lesbian here! you can't be both bi and a lesbian! lesbian means non men that like other non men! ur a non lesbian so you should go kys!!!! ^-^

because we all know what you mean, you don't see us trans girls as woman so you say that bi lesbians exist because you're scared of us transbians!

now go fuck off! your carrds aren't valid sources and lesbians have never liked men!

-From, an actual lesbian <3

fascinating. do you tell everyone you disagree with to kill themselves or am i just special?

it's also really cool how you're putting words in my mouth. bi lesbian as a label has nothing to do with being "scared" of transbians and i'd love to see your source for that claim.

and carrds might not be valid sources, but what about Vintage Queer Literature and newsletters?

Like this newsletter from 1984 talking about bi lesbians being integral to the lesbian community? (oh look at that, it also talks about how Some Lesbians treat them terribly! not much has changed, huh?)

Or perhaps this excerpt from Lavender Woman, which talks about bi lesbians all the way back in 1973?

Whoops I dropped this Google Doc full of vintage mentions of bisexual lesbians! Clumsy me! This one also talks about the awful and inaccurate "non-man loving non-man" thing a little) Here's a Masterpost on the history of the term (with cited sources)

I would also like to point out that multigender lesbians exist and that means sometimes a lesbian is also a man. Sorry! You can't just go "lesbian means non-man loving non-man" without excluding tons of butch lesbians and trans lesbians who personally identify as partially men. Did you forget that bigender people are like... real? Genderfluid people? (And before someone tries to imply that I'm implying that binary trans women are "partially men" or something, that's not what i'm saying and you know it. I'm talking about people who personally identify themselves as being both male and another gender)

tl;dr you have drunk the lesbian separatism kool-aid and need to log off because telling people to kill themselves and accusing them of being transmisogynistic with zero proof is abhorrent behavior + if you saw the butches im friends with you'd hurl

#tw suicide baiting #anon hate #this is a little all over the place but theres tons of people who have worded things like this better than i can #and i linked at least One person who did . so #not stim #ask to tag #long post

[moonystoes]

if you stomp and step on people intentionally, then you are right, I do not like you. One day she is going to seriously hurt someone. Doesn’t matter if people just get up and shake it off. Again, if we on social media hadn’t blown this out of the shop, it would not have been a problem with MT posting that picture. Honestly, I don’t see either MT or LJ doing anything wrong in this situation. We are the problem. And another thing, you need to be able to call out people on their bad behaviour without the racist card being thrown every time. Why is it always ok for people to lash out at McCabe for how she plays, but as soon as LJ is involved in anything people are being racists? Yes, some people are assholes and can’t criticise players objectively, but when someone comes out with an objective meaning of a situation, you get the “you are just picking on her because of race” bla bla bla

Wow what a bunch bullshit you just said. I feel like I need to discuss every point you said because none of them are valid.

1) "One day she's going to seriously hurt someone":

But...did she? How do you know she'll seriously hurt someone if she never did. You're just assuming that based on nothing. She hadn't harmed anyone, so this is irrelevant 💀💀. So let's go harass her and claim her as a aggressive player that injures them when... that never happened? Okay!

2) "if we on social media hadn't blown this out of the shop, it would not have been a problem with MT posting that picture.":

We? Who's we? Cuz that seems like its you and the racists that are bashing LJ for something she didn't do because of a picture withOUT context. 'We' are standing AGAINST the people that are blown this situation. That are actively claiming LJ is some fucking terrorist or something for wanting a fucking BALL. And yes, without YOU racists existing that picture would've been okay. But racists exist, and dumb idiots like MT postes pictures of her OWN black teammate that is experiencing racism for breathing and liking comments of something that never happened is a problem.

3) "I don't see either MT or LJ doing anything wrong in this situation.":

Well start seeing then tf💀💀. I don't even know why MT thought it was a good idea. Turner is in the wrong, be serious.

4) "We are the problem.":

Nope. That's you, not me. Bot us that's standing against racism in sports... don't label me as your kind.

5) "why is it always okay to lash out at McCabe for how she plays":

...is the lashing out in the room with us?? 👀 Because last time I checked, Katie's foals are funny, quirky, crazy, hilarious, and silly. Edits of her fouls are on tiktok and people say shes iconic and funny. The only people that I have seen that spoke against Katie's aggression are Chelsea fans. And that's because they see the HYPOCRISY coming from white supremacists and racists that hate on LJ for being aggressive but support Katie.

6) "But as soon as LJ is involved in anything people are being racists?":

Exactly yes 😘😝, yayy finally you got it 👍.

The reason why this situation is based on racism is because the issue they claim literally never happened. What MT posted never happened, but LJ is getting harassed when she NEVER did it. What happened against Nigeria, did you see me defend it? No, in fact I was shocked and disgusted by it. But this situation? Absolutely RACISM 😝😝!! Because when Le Tissier literally pushed Mayra Ramírez and elbowed faces like she's some fucking rugby player, no one was speaking about it. Everyone is crying about a 'headlocking' that never happened, when poor Mayra was injured and treated like shit in the WSL as well as her not even knowing English.

Lastly, fuck off and never come here again. And if you do, remove the anon so I can block you.

#moonytoes anon #chelsea wfc #chelsea women #woso #woso community #women's football #engwnt #england lionesses

[msmargaretmurry]

Biggest +1 to your “does a story need to mean/say something” answer. “I want my faves to fuck nasty” may not be ~profound~ (though it can be!) but it’s still something you’re saying!

correct!!!

i am going to put my annoying little academic hat on here though and really get into this a little. say you want your faves to fuck nasty so you write a pwp where your faves fuck nasty. on the surface what you are saying is "i wanted my faves to fuck nasty so i made this," which is in and of itself so valid of you. but the story itself will contain more than that. it will say "i wanted my faves to fuck nasty because i think it would be hot and sexy," or "i wanted my faves to fuck nasty because i think there would be interesting emotional resonance," or "i wanted my faves to fuck nasty because i think that scenario would showcase some interesting things about their characters" — or a combination of these things, or different movitations than these, but the story will still carry meaning about your own feelings about why you want your faves to fuck nasty.

on top of that, the way that you write your faves fucking nasty will say something. you are writing a fanfic sex scene: it will probably carry some of the tics and tropes of fanfic prose and fanfic smut, which says something about fanfic as a medium and you as a writer. (i 100% don't mean this in a way that's derogatory toward fanfic and smut; it goes for literally any other genre/medium as well. y'all know i love my faves fucking nasty.) you are writing for an audience: you are almost certainly putting thought into what that audience will find hot and/or compelling about your faves fucking nasty. "what is hot" and "what is compelling" aren't ideas shaped in a vaccuum; they're shaped by your preferences and by the communites and society around you. they're shaped by the fandom and the source material, which would in and of itself be a text with meaning (for a broad definition of "text"). maybe you're writing what you think will get clicks and comments. maybe you're writing because no one else is writing your faves fucking nasty so you just have to do it your damn self! all of this context is also meaning.

if you go into writing a story thinking "i'm just going to write something meaningless" or (and i would say especially, because consumption is way easier than creation, and creation often brings awareness of meaning anyway) if you go into reading a story thinking "i'm just going to read something meaningless," you are saying something about the concepts, themes, genres, and ideas to which you assign value — and those you don't. that's not neutral; that has meaning. simply bestowing or withholding the label of "meaningful" assigns cultural context and meaning to any piece of art. even fic about your faves fucking nasty.

obviously you don't have to think about this every time you sit down to read or write or watch tv. it's fine for it to all be background noise most of the time. but i think that being aware that it's there is, like, step #1 in developing strong media literacy and analysis skills.

#ask #writing #also there are plenty of ways to talk about media that's not steeped in heavy themes without disregarding it as 'meaningless' #'i want to watch something fluffy' 'i want to read something light that i can breeze through' etc