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helluvapoison · 4 months

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Hey can you write headcanons for alastor, angel dust(both platonic) and sir pentious (romantic) with a gen z/millennial reader? Just general stuff and interactions (like maybe talking about how things are for the lgbt community with angel and talking to alastor about gramophones and how they're coming back in style) and just some shenanigans

I know you don't have these characters listed in your writing list, and it's completely fine if you cant write for them but i love your writing style and characterization so I wanted to know how you'd imagine things would go

Alastor, Angel Dust (platonic) and Sir Pentious (romantic) x Reader

˚✧₊⁎ Alastor ⁎⁺˳✧༚

• “Hey Al! Loving the drip, it’s giving strawberry cow meets dark academia core.”

• Now he knows what others feel like when speaking to Zestial. He doesn’t understand half of what you say

• You taught him “tea”. Originally he thought you were providing real tea, something useful, not tedious gossip about— Oh. Oh. That could come in handy, actually. Alastor begins to pencil you into his afternoon tea. Sometimes you bring him useful information, others he has to sit through petty issues that make his eye twitch

• Alastor outright bans you from using your phone around him. He has no interest in this “meme” that reminds you of him (Don’t bring it out again, next time he’ll break it)

You groan, “It’s not as funny if I have to explain it!”

“It must not be very humorous in the first place.” He retorts

• He thinks you’re complimenting his taste in decor when you call it vintage

• You’ve proven yourself a useful acquaintance. Like Nifty, he’s grown accustomed to your presence and learned it may be better not to understand the inner workings of your mind

• “Got any aces?” someone asks while you play Go Fish with Husk, Angel and Sir Pina Colada. You never fail to jab a thumb in Alastor’s direction, cackling and kicking your feet

• They give you a peculiar look in reply

“Fuck you guys, I ate.”

• Yeah, they don’t get that one either

˚✧₊⁎ Angel Dust ⁎⁺˳✧༚

• It feels like every day Angel’s mid-insult and snapping his fingers at you, beckoning for you to conjure up a fresh comeback

• “Ooh! You just got cancelled, take the L, you fucking poser!”

He cackles, “Yeah! What they said!”

• Started calling himself an e-girl because you said it once about Charlie and never elaborated. He thinks it means cute… He’s not wrong? You don’t correct him, it’s funnier this way

• Playful arguments 24/7

“RIP, Angel, you would have loved Mean Girls— Wait, if a movie dies would it come to Hell? Never mind, don’t answer that, it would obviously go to Heaven.”

“I’ve met some real weirdos down here, sweetheart, and you outrank almost all of ‘em.”

• Something Angel noticed he could only appreciate from you is how different you react to his relationship with Val. He already knows it’s not healthy and he knows he gets defensive when people bring it up. Like the others, you listen, you comfort, you get furious on his behalf. You also offer him insight and labels he never thought would be helpful

• You hold up two fingers like you’re conducting an orchestra as you speak, “Say it with me; boundaries, bitch.”

“Boundaries..? S’at like bondage–?”

”NO!”

• Angel’s the only one that makes HellToks with you. The dances he learns faster and performs them better than you, often adding his own choreography to them. The “pass the phone” challenges never end well– especially when he tries to rope Nifty or Alastor in on them (RIP your old phone)

• Honestly, you’re pretty surprised you get along with Angel as well as you do. Y’know, considering he died a thousand years before you—

“I ain’t that old!”

“Your death certificate says otherwise, fam!”

˚✧₊⁎ Sir Pentious ⁎⁺˳✧༚

• He’s not sure how to handle how touchy you are first. You go around high-fiving everyone, freely holding hands with whoever lets you, offering hugs and– thump. Your head hits his lap, staring straight right at him with a goofy grin. And that.

• “Say slay,”

“Sssslay?”

• Oh. He quite likes the laugh that gets out of you

• Starts saying the word as much as possible, puffing his chest out proudly when you double over laughing. You don’t have the heart to tell him he’s using it wrong 99.9% of the time

• When you began consistently picking him for a chair instead of the others, he was stuck between throwing you across the room and making a break for it or pointing and laughing in the faces of everyone else. You chose him! HA!

• Bless his soul, the way he asked you out was so sweet

“I’ve done extensive research and found the equivalent of going sssteady in your language! I would like for us to move forward with the relationship ssstatus.”

“Huh? Oh. You want to go out with me? Yeah!”

“Fuck yesss!“

• Pentious gives ride or die a new definition. Everything you say or you do, he will back you up. His eyes sparkle from the praise you give him

• That, and making him blush takes little effort on your part. Complimenting him like you always do (at least he thinks you are, sometimes he’s not certain) has his cheeks glowing in seconds

• After following you around for an hour, because Pentious wanted to make sure you could get along with the Egg Boiz without him, they adopt bits of your personality and bizarre phrases. “Now we have two parents!” “No cap!” “Yes cap, you’re wearing a hat!”

• You’ve single handedly make the Egg Boiz worse in the eyes of everyone but Pen. He’s ecstatic over the results, he doesn’t know what he would do if he had to choose between you and his eggs

╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ this was so silly and fun, i hope you enjoy anon!

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel imagine #alastor headcanons #alastor x reader #angel dust headcanon #angel dust x reader #sir pentious imagine #sir pentious x reader #hazbin sir pentious #platonic or romantic

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consuming-karma · 1 year

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THE LOST BOYS HAND HCS.

buwan’s notes: I’d like to thank @britany1997 for fueling my wild obsession with the lost boys and their hands, and also for agreeing with me that Paul’s the KING of fingering. Thanks. 🤭

episode summary: talking about the lost boys and their sexy hands. yes I’m crazy.

content warnings: hand kinks, some hcs are for fem/masc audiences (will specify so). , spit kink, different other kinks that will take forever to mention, NSFW, me honestly talking about how my favourite necklaces is Dwayne’s hands, yeah..

PAUL

starting off strong with Paul, Brit this one is for you mainly (and me, but I’m on the side).

I think paul has very veiny and bruised hands. I think that the blonde has the type to manage to get bruises or cuts unintentionally and never notice it!

his fingernails aren’t long, and his fingers are somewhat long and he has HUGE palms.

like marko, he has the tendency to chew on his nails, maybe even bite the skin around it.

Paul’s hands is also littered with rings, I can’t begin to explain to you how many rings he has in his own little corner of the cave, even the other guys come to borrow from him time to time!

If I didn’t know any better I would’ve definitely done the “your hands are way bigger than mine 🥺” technique at him, it’s funnier knowing that Paul’s probably the type to fall for it.

Paul also has a tendency to need to grab, he will hold onto anything. His preference is your chest though, he loves how they cup perfectly into his.

he’s very touchy-feely, he doesn’t seem to understand how good it feels to just have you in his hands or arms, whether that’s just you hooking your pinky around his or letting Paul place his hand on your inner thigh, he just loves it.

If I could say anything, I’d say Paul gets off more on touching you rather than you touching him.

maybe even gets higher than he does smoking weed.

He’s like one of those cats who paw at you whenever they’re comfortable. He grabs at thighs, at upper arms, at the tummy. He loves all of you and want all of you to fit in his hands.

Paul’s hands are somewhat rough, I see Paul to be the type to suck at hand care and only really uses hand sanitizer and maybe lotion. (For you know what ;) ).

Brit and I are firm believers that he is the KING of fingering/oral.

Paul thrives, survives on pleasing his mate/partner.

His hands can grip and squeeze and please.

I like to think that Paul loves the way your thighs pool from out his palms, and how it doesn’t fit in both of his hands.

For my feminine readers out there, Paul would love to graze the tips of his fingers on your stretch marks and whisper sweet little dirty nothings into your ears as his free hand just rubs you on your hip dips. :)

Masc readers, never forgetting about y’all, his thick hands definitely wrap perfectly around your cock, and he definitely looks up at you prettily with those baby blues. His painted nails and rings make beautiful accessories for your dick <3.

Paul unintentionally fingers you to the point of overstimulation though, he’s got the attention span of a puppy and will not notice, no matter how many times you cum onto his hands.

his hands look amazing covered in cum and saliva ;)

spit on his hands and tell him to fuck his fist, his only lube being your saliva..

“Paul!” You whined, grabbing at his hands as they gripped firmly at your thighs. His face sported a grin as your squirmed in his hold, a worried look on your face.

It’s been hours since his fingers worked their magic inside of your hole, he worked your walls until they couldn’t anymore and it seemed like Paul would never stop.

A surprised moan left your lips as Paul grazed over a sensitive spot, Paul seemed to feel like the devil in disguise as he no longer grazed your sweet spot, more so, started abusing it.

You couldn’t stop your thighs from shaking and kicking as the overstimulation Paul gave you shook you to your core. You can see the black and white spots appear in your vision as you feel yourself get closer and closer to another high.

It felt like forever before Paul finally plunged his fingers deep into your hole one last time, letting you ride his digits until you came down from his high, twitching from the overstimulation.

After a short while, Paul gently pulled his fingers away, a string of cum connecting his digits to your hole before Paul brought it up to his lips and gently sucked.

His free hand held your hips in place, as you hazily looked up at him with confusion and a red face.

“Has anybody told you how divine you taste, babe?”

(visuals) :

MARKO

Marko’s hands are less veined than the rest of the boys, turning when he was around eighteen had him keep the smooth skin of a baby.

The curly-head’s hands are definitely more daintier than the rest of the boys, most of them have rough maybe thick hands, but Marko’s are thin and has little veins.

Although Marko covers it up with his fingerless gloves, I’d like to think that his hands are very smooth to the touch, his handcare is 10/10.

like Paul, his nails aren’t super long, I’d say he likes to keep them a nice length, but bites them off on the way.

His thumb has a mark where he keeps biting it with his teeth, unlike the other boys who might have bruises or cuts, he has a noticeable bump on his thumb and a small mark on his nail.

type of guy to be short but his hands are still bigger than yours. He always talks about his hands fits yours so well and how he loves seeing the size difference of both your palms together.

type of guy to also tell you that your body fits perfectly into his hands, his hands mold perfectly with your hips and thighs.

most of the time Marko does dirty talk you, but you can never reply back because most of his dirty talk’s in Italian, and you’re busy trying to keep Marko’s wandering hands from going under your shirt and latching onto your chest.

If Paul’s the most touchy with his hands, Marko takes second place with how touchy he is.

Marko has the tendency to play with his hands when anxious or anticipating something. He rubs his hands or massages his palms, looking off to wherever he’s expecting something.

Marko’s fingers don’t stretch you as much as the rest of the boys do, although the boys might be a bit more chunkier, Marko’s hands are small enough that they stretch you out to where it doesn’t hurt.

Marko’s hand game is strong, Paul gets cramps, but Marko doesn’t, I mean, the boy paints, he’s probably got some cool ass tricks in his sleeves to keep him from losing energy during your bedroom deeds.

Marko likes to listen to your sounds and your body, whenever he’s fingering you, he doesn’t mind the squealing or the squelching, he knows he’s the one who made you sound like that, and if anything, he’s more proud of it.

if I were to rate his fingering skills? 7/10. He’s got some learning to do but most of the time he’ll probably have you screaming his name from his fingers.

Fem!readers, this man eats pussy like he’s starved! Not the point though, because his hands are where it’s at, he knows how to work you up, and loves to tease, the tips of his fingers padded perfectly on top of your clit and he loves to go fast. No mercy. So while he’s enjoying a nice meal, you’re enjoying yourself.

Masc!readers, exactly the same!! This guy sucks cock like an animal and honestly it would take everything to get this guy off your dick. Since Marko’s hands are daintier, his hands definitely look amazing wrapped around you.

Marko would never admit it but, he loves when you stain his fingerless gloves with your cum <3, he’s the real artsy type.

He probably fingers you in public as well, no care in the world.

his favourite past time is watching your hands wrap around his cock, while his hands are bound together to keep him from being impatient <3

tie his pretty hands up and gag him, he likes the challenge!

Marko held you by the hands, his palms pressing them firmly to your back, your stomach to the bed and your back facing him. the curly-headed boy had you pinned to your nest in the cave.

Marko’s growls sounded in your ear as you felt your stomach flutter at his sounds. You could see him from your peripheral vision, his curls falling in front of his eyes as he pinned you.

You could feel the pads of his fingers gently running across the small of your back, almost..appreciating it in a sense, his hands felt soft, yet firm.

Finally, his hands slipped down to your ass, squeezing it in his palms as you squirmed from his firm grip. A small mantra of Marko’s name left your lips, unable to look back to see your boyfriend’s face.

You could feel from the air that he was enjoying this, enjoying you.

Marko, with the strength, turned you around, you laid on your back, bare for his hands to just wander.

His hands travelled from your ass back to your hips, up your stomach, and ended right on your chest. If it wasn’t so lewd, you would’ve thought Marko was giving you a massage.

Marko’s touch teased you relentlessly, you just wanted to yell out for him to touch you, use you. You wanted it so desperately, and Marko knew.

He grinned at your display of biting your lips and the small twitches his touch gave you.

“See, baby? You fit perfectly in the palms of my hands.”

(visuals) :

DAVID

David’s hands are very thick, probably the most thickest out of the boys.

His hands are the best for holding, gripping.

David’s hands could probably cover your whole ass if I know anything.

David’s very careful about his handcare. I think that David has the softest hands out of the boys, he takes good care of them, especially if he wears gloves to cover them.

Though I also think he’s got some blisters, years of driving motorcycles do that to you.

He’s got pretty long fingernails, they’re long enough to have the annoyance of cleaning them every time something gets under his nails.

He brings a cuticle around, I just can’t lie. I think that he’s the type of guy to be like those girls who’s always filing their nails.

probably pinches the hardest as well, he likes to do it when you’re not paying attention and actually causes bruises 😭.

watching him work without his gloves is so attractive, his hands moving as he writes in a notebook or diary, or when he’s playing with a cigar, it’s very, very, attractive.

The pads of his fingers is very soft, not tough like Dwayne’s and Paul’s.

Barely any rings litters his hands and the ones he has are very basic, no intricate designs, most of his complicated rings actually tore through a set of his gloves and he never worn flashy rings ever since.

Leather is his best friend, whether that’d be gloves or the handles of his motorcycle, or in this case, a leash to your collar.

He’s very into oral fixation, he loves shoving his fingers down your throat, likes the ability of being able to choke you out without pulling out his cock to do so.

He’ll also make you suck his digits clean after a long night of teasingly fingering you.

He loves seeing his hands around your throat too, he’s a sadistic little shit, if he doesn’t get off, you don’t either.

I think he’s got the thickest fingers out of the boys, he’s the one who stretches you out the most and sometimes it feels good, but it’s when he teased, that’s when you don’t like it.

Fingering skills are, annoyingly, at a 9/10. It would’ve been a ten if he didn’t tease.

Would NEVER ever paint his nails, like the boys always seem to have black nail polish and Marko’s and Paul’s are always chipped, but David’s is clean, polished, in good health.

His hands wrapped around your waist and dipping into your waistband, the tips of his fingers on the hand of your underwear.

Pulls you to him by hooking his pointer finger into your belt loops and into his chest.

Let him choke you out!!! He’ll be gentle!! Only because you’re human though.

Thumb on your lips always!! His thumbs make good work of finishing you!!!

A small shush left the platinum blonde as you tried to stop your whines, you moved uncomfortably on his motorbike’s seat, the leather being soaked in your wetness.

“careful, dear, you’re making a mess.” David mused, his lips shaped in a taunting smirk as his hands dipped deeper into your core.

You bit your lip to hold in your squeals, teased and tired. David could watch your expressions for the rest of his life.

he’ll never get tired of the way you cling onto his coat, your fingernails digging into its seams, as if any longer you’d have ripped his coat apart from the overwhelming feeling of his fingers pleasing you.

You tried to stay silent, feeling people’s gazes on you as you sat uncomfortable on David’s lap, his coat covered the indecent display of his digits inches deep inside you.

You were desperate for release, searching for your other three boyfriend to earn some mercy from David.

Your eyes looked around the boardwalk, eyes flicking from every similar person who looked similar to your boys.

Suddenly a chuckle and loud voices were heard, you saw your boys from afar. Hopeful, you decided to move off of David’s fingers when his free hand reached up to stop you by the throat.

A light squeeze to your throat, making you gulp and your core pulse with need.

“Eyes on me, dear. Don’t look at anybody else, especially when I’m this deep inside of you.”

(visuals) :

DWAYNE

THE BIGGEST OF THE BOYS!

DEFINITELY has the most veins out of the boys.

Can’t lie, Brit has listened to me want to lick his veins.

He’s got the lengthiest fingers out of them too. He’s the best when it comes to fingering.

His fingernails are nicely trimmed, it’s also littered with rings, his left hand is always bare though since he uses that hand primarily to hold laddie’s and he’s scared that Laddie might get cut from his rings.

Dwayne somewhat cares about his hands, he uses David’s shit though, lotion, Vaseline, serum, cream.

David doesn’t know how he runs out of hand cream so fast too.

Dwayne does carry his own hand sanitizer, but most of it goes to laddie and Paul.

Dwayne doesn’t have really flashy rings either, he doesn’t like the way it clicks together and it puts him in a very uncomfortable situation because he likes to massage his hands when awkward.

He’s big everywhere, his height, his heart, his cock, his hands. It’s crazy.

Prob can carry you in one hand, one arm under your ass and your arms around his neck.

Although he likes fingering, he prefers playing with your clit/cock even more, he’s surprisingly has the best stamina over all the guys but he likes to keep it secret.

A good surprise, I’d say.

I see him as the type to be more sensual than sexual. His hands are best at love-making than rough fucking.

besides Marko, he’s one of the best massuage therapists out there.

His hands somehow find every tense crack in your bones and somehow is able to perform chiropractic procedures like aligning your neck properly or fixing a locked jaw.

He owns a ton of essential oils, his hands always seem to smell of lavender or peppermint, and sometimes he does use it on you.

The boys have learnt that if you both smell like the same thing then you both most likely fucked teehee.

Dwayne’s hands are best for pulling hair!!!

Watch him tangle his digits into your hair and pull gently, maybe whenever you’re sucking him off, or when he needs a little handlebar during sex.

he likes to cover your mouth with his huge hands whenever you’re having a quickie in public, he loves the idea of keeping you quiet with just his hands over your mouth as he dicks you down in a shady alleyway.

He also looks amazing covering his lips with his hands, his veins are more prominent and they run down all the way to his upper arm.

I wouldn’t blame you if you told me you wanted to follow that long vein to the end ;)

his hands definitely flex and his veins show while he grips your headboard to death.

Dwayne’s actor, Billy rips panties with one hand, it’s no surprise Dwayne wouldn’t either.

And god he looks amazing doing so..

Hold his hands while you ride him, he wants to see you be so dependent on him and his hands, he’ll make you feel good, don’t worry! Just relax and let him do the work.

Leaves hand prints all over your body from how strong he grips!

In the end, let Dwayne wash your hair for you! He gives a good massage and he’ll leave you feeling relaxed then ever.

“Yeah…there..” you sighed in content, your stomach to your bed as a deep rumble of a chuckle was heard. “Feel good, sweetheart?” You nodded hazily, your hands gripping onto the sheets with pleasure.

“God Dwayne..when were you going to tell me you were this good?..” you groaned, feeling his huge hands run themselves down your back almost passionately. You could feel his fingers gently scan your back for any tense spots to fix.

A hearty chuckle was only heard from your boyfriend as he gently pushed his thumb into a tense spot in your back, a small crack leaving it as you let out a surprise yelp, before relaxing once again.

“Fuck..” you cursed out, feeling Dwayne’s hands reach up onto your shoulder and dig themselves into your shoulder blade. A whine left your lips as another pop was heard from your body.

You’ve never been so relaxed and turned on at this point, Dwayne feels amused by your reactions, sighing and whining in content and relaxation. He lives for the pleasure he gives you.

His hands massaged one of his favourite scented oils into your skin, hydrating it, and making you smell absolutely delicious to him, he couldn’t help but place a few kisses at the back of your neck as you felt like falling asleep under Dwayne’s touch.

After a while of a slow, long, amazing massage from Dwayne, the dark-haired man deemed you relaxed enough before he gently pulled you by the thighs, resting in between them as you yelped in surprise.

“Think you’re finished? Daddy needs his release too.”

(visuals) :

#✦ buwan consumes.#the lost boys #the lost boys 1987 #the lost boys x reader #tlb #poly lost boys #poly lost boys x reader #tlb paul #paul tlb #✦ dwayne’s karma.#dwayne tlb #marko tlb #david tlb #✦ marko’s karma.#✦ paul’s karma.#✦ david’s karma.

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piratefishmama · 10 months

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Finders Givers | Part 2

“STEVEN MARION HARRINGTON.”

“Not my middle name.” Although Robin had made several valiant attempts in guessing it every time she needed to burst into his office all guns blazing. Which was unfortunately… often. She still hadn’t managed to crack it.

He didn’t actually have a middle name. He wasn’t going to tell her that though, this was funnier.

She slapped a sheaf of papers down onto his desk, a brief flick of the first page told him they were call logs and transcripts “What did you DO?! Claudia’s been getting calls all morning asking about renovations?”

“Okay, so, in my defence. It was Nancy’s idea.” That was his whole defence. It was Nancy’s idea. His idea had been worse.

“Explain.”

“You know, most people in my position don’t have to explain themselves to people who work for them, their people just respect them, and do as they say without argument.” He mused, mostly to himself, but he could see the woman’s eye twitch in annoyance and so he sighed in defeat, it’d only wind up with him having those papers whapped around his head. “Remember the wallet I found?”

“The one that was bumming you out?”

“Yeah! Well, when I went out for a walk, I found the guys work address and—”

“You know we have guys who do that sort of shit for us, right? You can’t be stalking people, Dingus, what the fuck?” That sheaf of papers was dangerously close to hitting him. She’d picked them back up an everything.

“Just listen! He was at work, I didn’t talk to him or anything I’m not stupid, but... his manager made this girl cry so he just decked him, laid him out, one punch an he was down, then he just quit his job, right there, shit was spectacular.” Steve could appreciate a good bit of muscle, could appreciate a scrapper. Plus the guy was hot so, that helped. “Doesn’t look like his photo either, he’s got so much hair, Robs, it’s... wow, he’s just—”

“Ew, I don’t wanna hear about your crush on some random guy, what’s this got to do with these renovations Claudia’s being spammed over?”

“Okay so, guy lost his job.”

“Quit, quit his job.”

“Defending a ladies honour, something I thought you’d appreciate.” She raised a single unimpressed brow “but, I... I was gonna just send him rent money for a few months, y’know, cover a few bills, charity!” His heart was in the right place, his head however, his head was in space.

“That’s not charity that’s stupidity, but go on.”

“That’s what Nance said! Apparently it’d be suspicious if I were to be found sending large amounts of cash in nondescript envelopes to an apartment block notorious for drug activity, so she suggested that since I’m already buying that bar nearby, it’d look less conspicuous if I just... bought the building the guy lives in and claim I was developing it, make it seem like I have an interest in building up local problem areas.” She frowned, silent in her thoughts as she processed.

“... And what about the rent forgiveness?”

“I was gonna pay for his rent, might as well just not have him pay rent, y’know? An it’s gotta be building wide or there’ll be questions, like why is he so special, it’d put him under scrutiny. So Nance suggested putting a stop on rent as we ‘renovate’ as a sort of, we’re disrupting your life so here’s a break for you kinda deal.” Honestly Nancy really was a life saver, he really ought to give her a raise, he’d have been fucked over years ago had he not pulled her into the fold.

“So that means we’re actually going to have to renovate this block then?”

“I mean—”

“Were going to have to renovate this block, Steve. We can’t just forgive the rent forever, that’s bonkers, that would raise eyebrows, and we can’t afford eyebrows being raised at us right now. So you’re going to have to have professionals go in and survey the apartments inside for renovations.” This was now an actual thing he’d have to do.

“Ah well, gives me something to occupy my time with. Also I was thinking—”

“Never a good sign”

“Shut up, I was thinking of putting Argyle in there as a plant, like... the drugs being peddled out of that block are just trash, at least we could get a solid dealer in there and get Argyle out of the Wheelers basement.” He’d only been staying there because Joyce didn’t have a basement and Jonathan didn’t have room for him.

He was Jonathan's friend, and Jonathan came with Nancy, Steve didn’t have any reason to help him out. Now he did! And that reason was getting those poor people better weed.

“Are you not worried that the existing dealers will start shit with him for moving into their turf?”

“They touch him they deal with Hargrove, he's been particularly irritable lately, anything could set him off, pretty sure he’d be jazzed to break a few legs.” Release some of that pent up rage he seemed so good at bottling up in tiny easily burstable bottles. “One visit from that nut job and they’ll settle right down.”

He didn’t like Hargrove, but he had to admit the guy was a useful enforcer. Indebted to Steve too after Jane had taken a nail imbedded baseball bat to his old employers head in a bid to help her friend Max escape the debt her stepdad had racked up with him. Billy had also been freed, being Max’s step brother, left unmoored and in danger of a jail cell.

Steve had taken them both in after getting rid of Creels corpse. It was Hopper’s idea. Billy wouldn’t have survived in jail, too many enemies in there.

“It only takes one hit to hurt Argyle beyond repair though, maybe get rid of the dealers in there already, then give Argyle one of the apartments.”

“See you’re already on board!” And there was the whack round the head with the papers, his sharp objection going ignored.

“Fine, I’m on board, but only because it’s Nancy’s idea.” She was retreating as she spoke “Yours was a trash fire, like, not just one of those little oil barrel fires I mean like a whole dumpster fire. Argyle stays out until it’s safe though, I mean it Steve, I will get Hopper involved.” She opened the door, ready to go.

“You can’t threaten me with my own Chief of Police! That’s so mean!”

“Watch me, dingus. Also you have two people downstairs from your little block purchase wanting more information, do you wanna deal with them or should I?”

“Do you think I could actually spin a good idea to explain this that won’t get immediately reworked by either you or Nance?” She paused, a thoughtful expression on her face that answered his question more than any actual answer would have. “Exactly, you deal with it, you’re better at timelines an stuff anyway.” He was more the big idea guy.

“Yeah but you’re better at people.” It was true, Steve was more the people person out of the two of them. “Fine, I’ll deal with it, and I’ll ask Nance to find some decent contractors to do the work for us. Maybe… drop into my office in like, ten minutes? Considering you let your dick lead you to places I wouldn’t even go with a gun, you should at least make an appearance for these people whose lives you’ve interrupted.”

“Ngghhh fine. Fine. I’ll be there in ten.” And she was out with a tiny salute as her goodbye.

Part 4

#PirateWrites #FindersGiversFiclet #Steddie #Mob Boss Steve Harrington #No Upside Down AU #Shady!Steve #CW: light-hearted stalker vibes

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thetarsier · 1 year

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I would love just some good old fluff/angst moments, anything you want or think of I will be happy with. Inej or Remus have my heart but feel free to do any six of crow or marauders character<3 also welcome to tumblr!!!!

a/n: thank you for this, and thank you for the welcome! i'm liking it so far... :)

Summary: You overhear Remus talking about his crush, and it doesn’t occur to you that it might be you.

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings/notes: fem!reader, self-doubt and self-deprecating thoughts, drinking and being drunk, i think that’s it.

<3: remus lupin x fem!reader

You smiled as you entered the portrait that led to the Gryffindor common room. It had been a long day, and all you really wanted was to see your friends, your boys, and have them cheer you up. You knew they were in there since they rarely ever left unless they were pulling a prank, and the anticipation of seeing them made you practically giddy.

Well, the anticipation of seeing one of them in particular: Remus. He’d been your friend since first year, but ever since you were twelve, you’d wanted something more from him. You couldn’t tell if he felt the same way; Remus was the master of mixed signals, and you, the queen of overthinking. In an effort to keep him by your side, you never spoke or acted on your feelings, but that didn’t mean that they weren’t there.

“Ooh, Moony’s whipped,” Sirius laughed loudly, and you slowed your steps, “Honestly, mate, there’s nothing you can do now. You’re gone.”

“Don’t tease me,” Remus complained, “I know, I know. I just can’t stop thinking about her.”

That stopped you in your tracks. Remus had a crush on someone. Someone that was probably much prettier, smarter, and funnier than you. Somebody who Remus hadn’t seen in her pyjamas on a Saturday afternoon, somebody who hadn’t laughed so hard she spat her drink out in front of him. A nice, ladylike girl.

“We know, she’s so perfect,” James chipped in, “You tell us every time. I’m sick of listening to it.”

“‘Her hair, her eyes, her smile,’” Sirius imitated Remus, and you took a step back towards the portrait hole, “‘God, her laugh.’”

You should have known that Remus would never like you back. You were quiet, and awkward, and you didn’t always like the pranks that he and the boys played on the other students. Of course, he was looking elsewhere while your eyes were glued to him. After almost five years of pining, this was how your relationship was meant to play out.

Running from the common room, you had no destination in mind, just the knowledge that you weren’t good enough and the urgent need to find somewhere quiet to cry in your head.

~~~

“Hey, sweet girl,” Remus grinned as he slid into the seat next to you, “Sleep well?”

You smiled weakly with a small nod in his direction before you turned your attention back to Professor McGonagall, who was explaining the lesson at the front of the classroom. Remus’ shoulder brushed yours as he twisted to set his bag down, and you immediately shuffled away from him, trying to keep your eyes on your teacher despite Remus’ attention being on you.

“Everything okay?” He asked in that kind tone that made your insides pool, “You didn’t come to see us yesterday.”

“I’m fine. I just had a lot of work to do.”

Remus let it go in favour of writing down the notes that McGongall had written on the board, and you tried your hardest to ignore his presence beside you. You used to think that it meant something, only because James and Sirius sat all the way on the other side of the room, and Remus chose to leave his friends to sit next to you.

Now, you knew that it was nothing but pity that drove him to sit with you.

The lesson ended with the bell, and you gathered your things without another word to Remus. His eyes burned holes into your back as you retreated, but he didn’t try to go after you, probably because James and Sirius were more important than you, or perhaps the girl he actually liked was in the class, too, and he was distracted by her.

Either way, his silence was enough confirmation for you, and you hurried to the library in an attempt to get away from him.

Remus spent a lot of time in the library, but you knew that he had ancient runes next period, which gave you at least an hour to study before he might find you. Then, you could hide in your dorm until dinner, where you could surround yourself with some of your other friends and act too busy to care about him.

You wanted to be happy for Remus - he’d confided in you about how difficult it was for him to open up to people and trust them, so him having a crush on someone was huge - but the jealousy was almost too much to bear. You would bear it, though. You would bear the weight of the world for him, and the only pain you would feel would be the knowledge that he wouldn’t do the same for you.

Which was fine, of course, it was fine; you couldn’t force Remus to feel for you what you felt for him. It hurt, though. A steady, piercing type of pain that clawed down your throat and lodged itself in your heart, stabbing you every time you thought of him, or your non-existent future together.

And, oh, did you imagine. Living somewhere peaceful in the countryside, probably not very rich, but definitely happy. Baking cookies whenever you wanted, dancing in the kitchen at midnight, waking up and seeing his face illuminated by the soft sun. Having dinner parties with the other boys, drinking wine outside and watching the sunset, having him kiss your forehead as the two of you saw out another day. It was all there for you to access, yet it was wholly inaccessible.

It had been more than your designated hour by the time you wrapped up, and as you picked up your bag to leave, you noticed Remus standing in the doorway, eyes searching the library for something. You cringed away, turning around and hiding behind the nearest bookshelf until the time came when you peered around the wood and found that the sandy-haired boy was gone.

Only then did you leave, heading straight to your dorm to avoid Remus some more.

~~~

Gryffindor had won the quidditch cup, and James was throwing a party in the common room to celebrate. A party which involved a lot of alcohol, music, and dancing. It wasn’t your usual scene, but you’d gone to show your support, and you couldn’t even get to the door to leave if you had wanted to.

You were, however, pressed up against the wall, practically willing it to swallow you up as you watched Remus talking to a group of girls across the room. They were all giggling at the things he was saying, one of them even reaching over to touch his arm. Remus wasn’t yours to be possessive over, but the jealousy was rising back up your throat quicker than you could control it, fuelled by the alcohol in your system.

With a scoff, you pushed off of the wall and climbed the stairs to your left, following them around until you came to the window, where you decided to sit for a bit, just to get a bit of air. It was a wonder that a couple hadn’t decided to stop there for some time alone, but it was all the better for you as you stared out at the hills that surrounded the castle.

You weren’t certain how long you’d sat there staring, but it certainly wasn’t long enough before somebody interrupted you by clearing their throat. Breaking your gaze, you turned to whoever it was, not sure whether to be surprised or not when your eyes landed on Remus, hands shoved into his pockets awkwardly.

“You alright?” He asked.

“Yeah. Fine.” You answered.

He sighed, sitting down on the window seat by your feet and staring intently at you. By the slight droop of his eyes, you could tell that he’d had a few drinks, possibly even more than you.

“You’ve been so off lately,” He accused, his voice slightly less gentle than it usually was with you, “What’s up with you?”

“What? Nothing.”

“Did I do something? Is that what it is? Did I upset you in some way?” He reached forward and gripped one of your hands, “Please, forgive me.”

“Stop, Remus,” You tugged your hand from between his, “You’re just being mean, now.”

“Mean?” He pulled back, brows furrowed, “I’ve been mean to you.”

He said it like it was a fact. Like he was simply accepting what you’d said as the truth, and something about it felt wrong. He hadn’t been mean to you. He didn’t owe you anything, he was just doing what he wanted to do and if that didn’t include you, then that wasn’t up to you.

Shaking your head, you answered, “No, you haven’t. I’m just tired.”

“Don’t do that to me-” He slinked forward, the top of his head falling onto your chest, eyes looking right down into your cleavage. “-I don’t ever want to be mean to you.”

“You’re not,” You gently encouraged his head away from you, your hand lingering on his cheek for slightly too long, “It’s my fault.”

“No,” He pouted, “Nothing’s your fault. Nothing ever.”

You laughed, and his pout lightened into a smile, “I think I’m at fault quite a bit. Come on, you should go to bed.”

“Only if you join me.”

Again, you laughed, standing and allowing him to lean his weight onto you as you climbed the rest of the stairs up to his dorm and into his bed. You didn’t bother helping him undress, or brush his teeth, or anything of the sort - he was far too drunk to bother with any of those things - but he gripped onto your hand, prohibiting you from leaving before he fell asleep and his grip finally loosened.

You left him in his bed, asleep, closing the door softly behind you. Remus was your best friend, that was all. You were going to have to get used to that before it ate you up from the inside out.

~~~

Remus found you again the next morning, hair still messy, and dark circles apparent under his eyes. He dropped onto the grass next to you, fingers immediately beginning to pick at the grass in front of him as you smiled a greeting at him.

“Thanks for taking care of me last night.” He offered in his own greeting.

“I just put you to bed, it’s fine. However, I did have the privilege of listening to you ramble about how I can do no wrong, so…”

“God…” He buried his face in his hands, “I’m sorry.”

“No, no. I’ll be reminding you of it whenever we next argue.”

He blushed, and you failed miserably at trying to stop your heart from turning into a puddle at your feet. God, this whole ‘trying not to have a crush on your best friend’ thing was going terribly - it seemed that you were particularly bad at not being in love with Remus Lupin, it was as though nothing he could do would ever dissuade you. You just wanted to be his, even if he wanted to be someone else’s.

“So,” You started again, “Did you talk to her at the party?”

“Who?” He furrowed his eyebrows, revealing the small dimple right above his right brow that you longed to brush over with your thumb.

“Your crush. I heard you talking about her a couple of weeks ago, you know,” You admitted, avoiding his eyes, “If she has any sense, she’ll be head over heels for you, too.”

“I’m not so sure…” Remus trailed off, “She’s been a bit distant lately.”

“Maybe she’s just confused,” You smiled despite the fault forming in your heart, “Or playing hard to get.”

“She’s not the type,” Remus returned your smile with a slightly embarrassed one of his own, “You heard me talk about her? Do you know who she is?”

“No, I didn’t hear her name.”

Perhaps you were imagining the way his shoulders sagged in what seemed to simultaneously be relief and disappointment, but you certainly didn’t fabricate his finger brushing over yours on the prickly grass.

“Do you want to know her name?”

You nodded. Despite the fact that you already despised this girl beyond belief, you were also sure that if Remus liked her, she had to be some kind of angel on Earth. She was probably the kindest, prettiest girl at Hogwarts, and you held your breath as though waiting to be handed a court verdict.

But you weren’t given a name. Instead, a warm hand brushed your cheek, and Remus leaned towards you, lips just a breath away from yours, waiting for you to pull back. When you didn’t, paralysed by shock and desire, he persevered and kissed you. It wasn’t the kind of kiss that played with fireworks in the back in a dramatic film, it was a soft, slow, special kind of kiss that seemed unique to the two of you.

It was perfect.

When Remus pulled away, hands still holding your face, the only thing you could manage to say was: “So? What’s her name?”

And all Remus could do was laugh before he kissed you again and again and again.

#remuslupin #remus lupin x reader #marauders x reader #remus lupin fluff #remus x reader #remus lupin x you #marauders fic #marauders imagine

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adobe-outdesign · 1 year

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a while back I mentioned The Muppets Sex and Violence pilot and seeing as most people haven't seen it I wanted to bullet point out some of the insanity in it for everyone

This was the second pilot produced, with The Muppets Valentine Show being the first

The entire thing USED to be freely available on YouTube but Disney decided a pilot from 1975 that you can't watch on Disney+ anyway was losing them money so I had to cobble these notes together via memory and YouTube clips

The setup is a bit different from the actual show. There's no guest star (this idea was instead used for the aforementioned first pilot), there's very little backstage story and more focus on unconnected skits

There's no background music throughout most of it and pacing is sluggish at best, leaving periods of silence behind. about halfway through you WILL start to wonder if you're in Muppet Purgatory

Instead of Kermit the host is a guy named Nigel. I'll probably make a separate post on him later but for right now all you need to know is that he has the personality of wet cardboard and looks like he wants to lie down and take a nap 24/7 which like. same

For some reason the main three characters are Nigel, Sam the Eagle, and Floyd(???). Kermit shows up for like 30 seconds

Crazy Harry is in. the ceiling??

Animal is there but he's literally so feral he's kept locked in a dungeon that they have in the conference room (as you do)

Janice has a line and sounds absolutely nothing like herself (as Fran Brill is her performer here instead of Richard Hunt)

There's a wiseman in the backstage area and nothing about him is ever explained. they're just like "oh and that's our wiseman"

The seven deadly sins are there. that sounds like a joke but it's not

Their version of Lust is a Muppet made entirely of tongues that flirts with the female secretary then proceeds to say "love you, sweetheart" to Nigel after giving him a full-body look-over. To date this is unironically the best depiction of Lust I have ever seen

Actually a few of the sins have cool abstract designs. for example, Vanity is a literal vanity desk and Avarice is a cash register

Their proposal for an eight deadly sin is "wearing funny pants to a funeral"

at least one of the female Muppets that Kermit briefly dances with looks like This

There's a sketch just called "Aggression" that's done entirely in gibberish and about halfway through I wondered if I was having a stroke

There's also a sketch involving living pencils and puns

The Electric Mayhem perform a song and it's just straight up 90% innuendo

Statler and Waldorf have a few scenes but they're just sitting in a room instead of heckling and come across like they're Literally Dying

at one point the grandfather clock in the background stops ticking and Statler just says "either that clock is stopped or we've just died" and that's the last we see of them

The Swedish Chef segment has Chinese subtitles under it and honestly that kind of makes it funnier

also at the end of the segment the Chef takes out a blunderbuss and shoots a sandwich with it

During the credits the camera pulls back to reveal all the Muppet performs running around. Disney would NEVER

Sloth shows up fifteen minutes late with Starbucks

#muppets #the muppets #the muppet show #pilot episode #outdesign posts things #'these notes are scattershot and incoherent' congrats! now you know what watching the special is like #I don't know why I bothered typing all this other than a need to bring semi-obscure muppet trivia to the masses #greatest hits

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ickaimp · 1 year

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[BotW] Excuse Me While I Kiss this Guy (discontinued)

My SidLink fic, ‘Excuse Me While I Kiss this Guy’, has been getting a lot of attention on Ao3. It’s two parts, and I tried to write a part three from Link’s POV. That was back in 2018, and I’ve since moved five times. Needless to say, it never got past the WiP stage and the HTTYD fic, ‘Coming Down is the Hardest Thing‘ ate our brain instead. But in honour of Tears of the Kingdom, figured I’d put everything in roughly a chronological shape and post what got written. It’s not complete, prolly never will be, but hopefully it’ll give a couple chuckles. 2900 words. There is also now a bonus scene at the end of Excuse Me While I Kiss this Guy on Ao3.

+++ He didn’t mean to return to the Zora Domain.

Death Mountain lived up to its name, Vah Rudania had been freed from Ganon’s touch, and all Link wanted to do was go somewhere cooler where he could relax and recoup from climbing over a moving metal structure that was standing over gigantic pools of lava. So his duty done to the Gorons, he’d pulled out the Sheikah slate and hit the first shrine that looked near water. Finding himself facing a handful of angry armed Zora guards had been a bit of a shock, but he’d honestly been too tired to care. Getting the helmet off and breathing the cool humid air of the Zora domain helped, more so when Sidon arrived. The shock on the prince’s face was comical. Even more so when he told his guards to stand down and offered Link a bath. +++ The kiss to the top of his head was unexpected, and made his chest feel light and fluffy. The gesture was as unexpected as it was confusing, but not in a bad way. Sidon’s explanation, his offer of kisses, just made it funnier. +++ Kisses. Link reminded himself as he struggled and fought his way through the shrine. Sidon believed in him, and when Link finished, he could see Sidon again. And get another kiss. +++ He didn’t know how to pay back Sidon for the encouragement. For the kisses. And he wanted to. He wanted to show Sidon how much it meant to Link. How much Sidon himself meant to Link. Armour was important to Zora. Milpha had made him armour. He was pretty sure there were books in the library that explained how to make armour. And armour would keep Sidon safe when Link wasn’t around. He could do that. He had gems and supplies from his travels all over Hyrule. He could make armour. +++ He couldn’t make armour. He could, but not armour for Sidon, who was much larger than Link, or the average anyone. The armour came out the same every time he tried, just the right size for him to fit in to. This was a problem. +++ “You’re making something entirely new.” Rhondson said, shaking her head over Link’s confusion. “You and your magic have seen jewellery and many kinds of armour and know what shapes to make things it has seen before. But to make something new, you’re going to have to do it the hard way.” Link looked down at his hands. Well, it wasn’t as if he didn’t have the time to learn something new.

+++ Zora made their armour from scales, but Link didn’t have scales. Which meant that he needed to get scales somehow. What had scales? Fish, of course. Zora, but he couldn’t ask them for scales, not for this. Dragons. He had a small collection of their scales and horns. Not enough for armour. Which meant that he’d have to get more.

“I’m gonna go fight a dragon.” Link declared, anticipation singing through his body.

“Link? Is everything okay?” Zelda looked worried as she peered into his face. “You’ve kind of got your crazy eyes on.”

He just grinned at her.

“Okay then.” Zelda sighed and shook her head. He knew that he worried her, that before the Calamity he’d been raised to be a knight, with all the genteel manners and stuff, but he didn’t remember any of that.

And really, it sounded completely boring and dull. He liked who he was now, he couldn’t go back to whatever he’d been before. Zelda had accepted that, but she still fussed at him. It was kind of... nice, in a strange way.

She kissed him on the cheek. “Go do your thing. Try not to come back all bloody.”

He appreciated the fact that she never referred to the castle as his home. It was hers, certainly. And while he didn’t mind staying here, it didn’t feel like home to him.

His heart called him elsewhere.

‘No promises.’ He agreed, kissing her cheek as well. Her kisses weren’t like Sidon’s. Still sweet, in a different way. Softer, for one thing. And not as varied, she liked to kiss and be kissed mostly on the cheek.

He liked Sidon’s kisses better. The feeling of rough scales on skin was more welcoming to him than that of soft Hylian skin. Kissing Zelda didn’t leave his heart fluttering and skin tingling and wanting more. +++ The dragon scales were too large and unwieldy to just make into armour. Especially for someone who was as streamlined as Sidon. Cutting them down with normal tools didn’t work, they shattered swords and shears alike. The only thing that seemed to be able to cut dragon scale was dragon scale itself. Link growled to himself, realising that this meant he needed to get more scales, some for the armour, some to use as tools. Which meant more time away from Sidon. He sighed. He could do it. +++ ‘Think it’ll work?’ Link signed, as Bazz looked contemplative, looking over the scales Link had harvested and started to cut into shapes based off the books and patterns he’d found.

“It should.” He agreed. “My biggest concern is what are you going to attach it to? You’re going for shock resistance, so metal is out, which means some sort of really heavy duty hide or cloth. If you use leather, you could boil it, making it harder and shape it, but I don’t know what would be thick enough.”

That was a problem. Monster hide might work, but he’d killed most of those.

And he wanted something for the shock resistance too. It was kind of worrisome that Zora couldn’t even touch shock arrows, leading Link having to collect them from the Lynel....

Link paused, looking up towards the tip of Shatterback Point. ‘Be right back.’ He signed, and took off running.

“Wait! No!” Bazz hissed. “Link! He’ll kill me if you come back dead!”

Link laughed as he jumped off a balcony, his hang-glider snapping open and catching the ocean breeze. The breeze wasn’t strong enough to get him all the way to the top, but it’d get him part way there.

+++

A few hours later, Link pulled the fresh Lynel hide out of his pack and set it in front of Bazz. ‘Think it’ll work?’

Bazz made a sound like he couldn’t decide if he was laughing or crying. “You’re certifiably nuts.” He said, shaking his head. “The two of you deserve each other. Yeah, I think that’ll work.”

Link tilted his head to the side, wondering what Bazz meant by that.

“We’ll have to sit down sometime with a pint or two and I’ll tell you some of the things our Prince has gotten up to in the past.” Bazz grinned, his sharp teeth glinting. “You heard about him being eaten by the Octorok and going up against Vah Ruta on his own? That’s nothing.”

Link grinned. He knew he liked Sidon for a reason. +++

“Link, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about your new habit of carving dragon scales during meetings.” Zelda’s lips pressed together in a disapproving line. “It’s scaring some of the Council.”

Link grimaced. It was about the only time that he sat still long enough to get any carving done, he was constantly interrupted otherwise. ‘You want me to stop?’ He offered. He’d just have to figure something else out.

“Oh good heavens, no!” She beamed at him. “Could you please sit next to Councillor Tyrol? We might be able to get some work done if he stops sharing his ‘hunting’ stories. He’s quite terrified of you, you know.”

+++ Zelda glanced around before tugging on Link’s arm and pulling him closer. She had a mischievous curve to her lips and he leaned in so no one else could overhear what she was saying. “Some of the Council thinks you’re dating a Gerudo woman.” She whispered, then covered her mouth with a hand to contain her laughter.

It made a certain amount of sense, he was in Gerudo town a lot. … He also wore the clothing a lot while coming back. Did they think that he was dating himself? Or someone else? He paused, eyes narrowing as he remembered the inquires to the Gerudo Chieftain's health. “Riju’s twelve.” He deadpanned. She may have been the steadfast leader of the fierce Gerudo, but she was also a kid who loved soft plushies, especially those of Sand Seals.

Zelda nodded with barely repressed glee. “I know that and you know that, but how many people here do you think have meet a real Gerudo in their lives? Much less know who the Gerudo chief is?”

That was a good point. They should probably fix that, get more of all the various tribes together more often. ‘Should I start mentioning Isha more?’ He offered.

She thought about it, then giggled. “You should invite her to the castle as a merchant.” Zelda grinned. “Plus, I’d like to meet her.”

+++ ‘You need a break.’ Link signed with a frown as he looked Zelda over. She looked kind of like she wanted to punch something then take a nap. “I can’t.” Zelda closed her eyes, looking frustrated. “There’s no where in the castle I can go that someone won’t find me with some sort of emergency. I feel like all I’m doing is putting out fires.”

Link pulled out a bomb and offered it to her. She stared at it for a moment, which he was starting to think was the default reaction to being offered a bomb. Although it wasn’t like he offered them to just anyone, but Sidon always looked so surprised and confused by the bombs.

Zelda looked like she was contemplating using it.

“No.” She shook her head, pushing the bomb away. “Thank you, but no. That’d just undo all the hard work we just finished constructing.” Which was a pretty good point. With a shrug, he put it away again. A thought hit, and he looked her up and down, silently measuring her with his eyes, a smirk growing.

“Link.” Zelda crossed her arms, turning her body away, looking uncomfortable ‘We’re almost the same height and size.’ Link grinned at her. He was a little broader in the shoulder, she a bit broader in the hip, but still about the same proportions. Well, given his lack of height.

“And?” Link bounced a little on the balls of his feet, feeling pleased with himself. ‘That means you should fit my clothes.’ He explained. ‘And I should fit yours.’ She stared at him for a moment, her mouth agape. “There’s no way it’d work. I mean, you don’t talk, that’s easy for me to mimic, but the ruse would be over as soon as you opened your mouth.”

That was easy enough too. He held up a finger, silently motioning for patience, then rubbed his nose vigorously, until it was red, then coughed a couple of times. “I’m sick.” He rasped, trying to pitch his voice slightly higher. “I need to stay in bed.”

Then he fluttered his eyelashes at her and grinned.

Zelda gaped at him. “No.” She said, then immediately wavered. “I mean. No. It couldn’t possibly work.” He shrugged. ‘I need to finish carving some scales, I could do that while you go on a ride, get some fresh air. Wear the champion tunic, everything'll run as soon as they see you coming.’

Link could see her visibly waver. “Oh.” She glared at him, stamping her foot in irritation. “This is a horrible idea. Give me your tunic.” Link grinned and tapped the Sheikah Slate, switching clothing until he was wearing the Champion’s Tunic, pulling it off over his head and tossed it to her. Zelda wrinkled her nose, holding it away from her face. “When was the last time you washed this?” He gave her a puzzled look back. He never washed any of his clothes, any rips, tears, burns, or other assorted damage were gone whenever he dismissed them and put them back on. “Nevermind.” She shook her head, pulling the tunic on. It was a little big on her in the shoulders, but nothing too obvious. He pulled off his pants and handed them to her as well, before wandering over to her wardrobe and sorting through it before finding a long nightgown, pulling that over his head. This method of getting dressed was such a hassle, it was so much easier to get dressed via the Sheikah Slate. Less fabric to get tangled up in. “You’re hopeless.” Zelda informed him sounding amused and fond as he felt hands tug the fabric down over him. He gestured his thanks, smiling a bit to see her in his clothing. It was kind of strange, seeing her dressed like this. He reached up, undoing the pins in her hair, fingers quickly undoing the braids and messing up her sleek smooth strands. He could never get his hair nearly as soft and nice. The thought of if Sidon liked his hair, so different than the Zora’s scaled flickered through his mind, then he dismissed it. He was pretty sure that Sidon liked him, scales or no scales. Pretty sure. “Gah.” Zelda batted his hands away, stepping backwards out of reach before moving towards her vanity, checking her hair in the mirror. She made a face at seeing it so disordered, then grabbed a tie, pulling it back in a messy pony tail, then teasing the hair out on the sides of her face a bit. “What do you think?” She asked, looking up at him. Link walked over so they could see each other in the mirror. They looked disturbingly alike. They could almost be siblings, possibly even twins. He nodded, and she echoed the movement. “Okay.” She agreed. “This’ll work.” He gave her a thumbs up. +++ A knock on the door interrupted Link’s concentration and he growled in annoyance. He stood up, detouring long enough to grab a blanket from Zelda’s bed and tossed it over his head, wrapping it around himself like a cocoon before opening the door. “What?” He snapped, his voice low and rough. “n-Never mind.” Councillor Tyrol scurried off. Link huffed, shutting the door with a slam and went back to making smaller scales out of larger scales for armour. +++ “Got any clothing in red?” Bazz inquired, idly twirling his trident in one hand. It immediately put Link on edge, because there was something a little too casual sounding to the warrior’s tone.

‘No.’ Link signed, confused. Almost all of his clothing was blue, unless he took the time to dye it. ‘Why?’ “Could you get some?” Bazz asked. Link shrugged. He didn’t have any at hand, but it’d be easy enough to swing by the Hateno Village and talk to Sayge at the Kochi Dye Shop. He could spare five rupees for payment, and a few extra apples or spicy peppers he could use for red dye. ‘Yeah. Why?’

“The next time you come to see the Prince, you should wear something red.”

This was starting to sound really suspicious. ‘Anything specific I should wear?’

“Doesn’t matter. Just something bright red.” Bazz shook his head. “As a favour to me?” He asked, attempting to look as sweet and innocent as a kitten. It didn’t quite work.

Link did kind of owe Bazz for his help in making the armour, making sure it’d fit the prince and keeping it a secret from Sidon. “Okay.” He agreed. It was easy enough.

“Thanks.” Bazz gave him a bright grin, full of razor sharp teeth and Link wondered just what he’d gotten himself into.

++++

“Link! My Dear!” Link had just enough warning to brace himself before he was picked up and pressed against Sidon’s ginormous chest. “It is such a pleasure to see you!”

“Sidon!” Link wrapped his arms around Sidon, pressing as close as he could. Sidon smelled like he usually did, water and musk, something always made Link relax.

It meant safety, comfort, and laughter.

He kissed the nearest part of Sidon he could reach, his jaw just below the fin that framed his face and felt a small shiver run down Sidon’s frame.

Sidon eased his grip slightly, pulling back so he could look Link over. “It’s so good to see you healthy. No new scars?”

Link smiled and shook his head. Sidon beamed in delight, taking Link’s hand and kissing the palm. “I’m glad.”

Seriously, Sidon was the only person who worried if Link could take care of himself. Well, maybe other than Zelda, but she was more likely to laugh at him for it.

“Is this new?” Sidon asked, peering at Link’s shirt. It was just a basic tunic, but he’d dyed it the bright red of fresh chillies, as Bazz had requested.

Link shrugged. Honestly, he couldn’t remember where he’d picked the shirt up from.

“I like it!” Sidon beamed at him, and Link wondered how he could contain such joy in his face. “We match!”

… They did. He looked at the shirt against Sidon’s scales and realised that they did, the dye almost the same colour as Sidon. Anyone seeing them together would probably assume they were a matched set.

He didn’t know whether to be grateful or to strangle Bazz for his meddling, when Sidon barely set him down for the remainder of the day, almost always keeping in contact with Link. He also made a note to wear more red, if this was Sidon’s reaction.

-fin- -And that’s all folks.

#legend of zelda #prince sidon #link #sidlink #breath of the wild #botw

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fffrost · 7 months

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may i hear about your mk1 ships 🫴

oh what a terrible thing to ask me. So far I have only 2 ships I'm invested in and seek content for. And then there is this horrible crackship I made that has taken over my mind. (accompanied with drawings, because would I even be me if I answered an ask without an image? no.) Number one for me is Syzoth/Ashrah... I love them so much and their dynamic is so AUGH. Both characters are precious to me, I want them to be happy forever and never sad. I haven't drawn much content for them (yet) but I guarantee that I think about them constantly.

(this was my only syzoth drawing readily available)

Number two!! is Raiden/Smoke (thunderclouds). This is honestly more of a casual ship!! I like both of them and their dynamic together is really fun to draw and write, but honestly it wasn't an immediate click for me... and I want Raiden to myself. That all being said, they're cute, they go on picnic dates, they point out clouds to each other, and I think they beat each other up sometimes as a fun little enrichment treat for both of them. Image:

Worst for last!!! This came to me as a fever dream and I first want to explain exactly how I started shipping them- So a bit back I was sitting in my dorm staring at my wall thinking about the dudes, as usual. And I had this wonderful idea: you know what two characters would absolutely despise each other? And would want to go full looney toons style violence on each other? Reiko and Bi Han. I was so enthralled with how absolutely hilarious I thought their dynamic simply being put in a situation together would be, that I decided to write a short fic where they get put into a Situation. It started off as a joke with no further intention... but soon after, to make it even funnier, I thought to myself "hey, what if there was only one bed?" I've recently been delighted to find that a few other people have similar ideas to me in the regards of Bi Han and Reiko being a pairing (yippie!!!). But, honestly, I just find it so funny that they would hate each other so much and hate even more that they end up having feelings for each other. In conclusion: I am writing a multi chapter slowburn. I DO have more thoughts on them but I'm going to keep it under wraps here and perhaps make a separate post about what I think of their dynamic. There IS specific context for these drawings. But . I'm not writing all that.

Oh! Also Johnshi too I guess! They're cool. Thumbs up to them.

#ask #thank you for asking!!#erm #bireiko #thunderclouds #mk

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jttw-monkeybusiness · 10 months

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Sophie is a cutie, I wouldn’t be surprised if she ever had relationships and dates. Though I’d wonder how wukong would react if he ever found out. It’d probably be a destruction of shangri-la!

Sophie actually has never dated someone actually! But at her age, it's very normal nowadays since studying and work take a lot of your time and finding a partner is not as easy as before. But she never felt like she is in a hurry and never felt pressure to find someone since she always wanted something serious. So when Wukong found out that Sophie is not married nor does she have anyone in her mind by the age of 25 (when she started the journey) he was very SUS. In their world people get married even before the age of 18 bc ancient times. He first thought that there was legit something wrong with her which makes this situation even funnier. If it was just Wukong and Sophie he would circle around her, trying to find 'the problem and reason why she is not married yet. Sense Wukong is a very simple-minded 'man-monkey-creature' he would honestly side-eye at Sophie's butt bc..well...he is a man. "Stop looking at my butt. Seriously it's not funny." "...you are not sick, right? You are normal. Why the fuck you are not married yet, woman!?"

Luckily he will get it when Sophie explains that she just hasn’t found anyone that she can see the future with them and she never felt like it's important to her at the moment. For Wukong marriage and relationships were NEVER his first priority or interest until he found Sophie, but those feelings came much later. And that threw him for a loop and made him even more furious

#sophie #jttw sun wukong #personal questions #sun wukong #sun wukong x reader #journey to the west #jttw tag #journey to the west au

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starry-bi-sky · 5 months

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honestly your dpxdc clone au gives me life, its adorable as all hell and im a sucker for found family but with that being said, its so freaking hysterical to me that Danny is going full feral liminal menace at Wes any time hes near and Wes himself is still 100% into it the freak (affectionate) and thats not even pointing out the paralles it could possible create since danny and dames gives massive parallels to dick and damian and dick does have a thing for redheads.

yeesSSSSS! I was planning on hoarding this to myself but i can't not reply. and i'll be able to find this again with the clone^2 tag so win WIN. i'm so glad you are as delighted by this as me. It's so hilarious to me that Danny just becomes a complete freak whenever he spots Wes, and I'm the one who wrote it into existence. Like- like i don't know how to explain my vision in words but like, its like Danny sees Wes and immediately goes 'what can I do to make his day worse'. And then he goes and does it.

(honorary read more because i talk a lot)

He's relatively normal around his friends too, which makes him going full-fledged unhinged around Wes even funnier to me. Like, Danny will spout weird shit sometimes to Sam and Tucker, but usually its prefaced with him talking about patrol or there would be context before he said anything. With Wes? Though?? he will just. say anything, completely unprompted. Slings an arm around his shoulder like they've been buddies since primary school and then spits out a weird new fun fact he learned about the bodily anatomy while researching his latest cold case. All vaguely-threatening but utterly insane things to say as way to start a conversation.

And sometimes its not even that, he'll walk up to Wes and ask him if he saw the latest daytime fight between Phantom and Skulker. And then he'll say "yeah i missed it myself but I saw clips of it being posted online" and then watch Wes mentally explode him with his mind. or he'll disparage Phantom for having such a young partner with him, "Can you believe he'd let a kid fight ghosts with him? I'd never let my brother ghosthunt with me if I was Phantom."

All of this with such a deceptive look on his face but the most delighted, shit-eating gleam in his eyes. Wes is chewing glass and he wants to yell that he does let his brother fight ghosts with him. Also you told him yourself that nothing would've stopped your demonic (Wes' words) little brother from joining you.

Damian gets in on the fuckery occasionally, but since he's not around often with Wes about, it doesn't happen nearly as often as it does between Wes and Danny. Sam and Tucker know he's screwing with him too, and both of them are a little wary about him being careless with his secret id. But he's been doing this since he was 14-ish and it hasn't backfired yet. So. They're not actively stopping him.

Danny walks back to his lunch table after terrorizing Wes and Tucker just asks him what he said, because Wes was about as red as a tomato when he walked away. Danny offhandedly sighs and innocently says he tried to have a conversation about Phantom with him. Wes didn't seem to like it all that much. Weird.

And yes, yes. Wes is totally into it and is slightly enraged about this fact, because not even he knows why he's into it. The freak (affectionate). Danny gives him this troublemaker smirk, and i did say smirk, and Wes doesn't know whether or not if he wants to smack him or kiss him. Or both. Like, yeah, pine, white boy, pine.

(And this is a dramatized image but I'm also highly entertained by the idea that Wes keeps getting routine dirty looks from various peers because they, too, have a crush on Fenton. Except Fenton doesn't talk to anyone else unless its his friends and sometimes Valerie, and Weston, the guy who keeps accusing him of being the local vigilante, is somehow routinely having conversations with him?? And BLOWING IT?? Like everyone else thinks he's fumbling so bad, and yet fenton keeps tALKING to him.)

And yes!! i'm always so pleased whenever someone brings up the parallels D+D have to Dick and Damian, because that was lowkey my intention when I was making the solo clone damian au. Although it was supposed to be more implied since I don't really know much about Damian and Dick other than they're very close and Dick was Damian's Batman for a year. And then of course the very smaller parallel (??) 'what if' between Bruce and Damian and D+D in clone^2 considering who they are both clones of.

And man this just makes me want to talk about when batfam meet D+D because I just want them to see D+D be so brotherly towards each other. Like I want them to see Bby Dames wearing his goofy fun fact shirts and stealing Danny's hoodies/flannels/etc and blatantly lying about it when Danny asks. Only for Danny to then throw him over his shoulder like Tadashi from BH3 and jump around.

And also. I do not know what Damian Wayne's (DW as I'll call him) stance on being called "Dami" is - the general consensus I've seen is that its usually used as a playful nickname in order to get a rise out of him, and he doesn't really like it.

But baby Dames being called that freely, and often, and its sometimes used to get a rise out of him but thats typically what nicknames do. Its used as easily as his full name is with the same amount of affection. And its like his main go-to nickname. "Dami" and "Dames" with the occasional "Bud/Buddy", "Squirt", "Little man", etc. Not once is he ever called 'demon-spawn'

(which i know is a fanon nickname but its a relatively popular nickname)

but yeah, uhhh. i think thats all of my thoughts on the matter. for now lmAO

#danny fenton is not the ghost king #clone^2 #i use 'like' so much its not even funny jhdf but it just puts an emphasis on the sentence #honorary read more tag bc damn i talk a lot #i should make a post about danny's relationship with red huntress in the clone^2 au because i like to imagine that's different too #anyways danny and wes' dynamic in clone^2 brings me a lot of joy. they get stuck in a room together and danny gets the biggest grin ever #and wes stares at him before going completely deadpan 'im in hell'. he's being dramatic and only slightly for real.#also im not sure WHAT damian does - honestly the most extreme thing i can think of is him breaking into wes' house and threatening him #but wes has called him danny's 'demonic little brother' ever since. sOMEbody has to give him his 'demon' nickname its just not gonna be #danny or jazz who do it. anyways damian fully supports messing with wes and anyone else who has a crush on danny

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autisticlancemcclain · 1 year

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Lance knows the tradition. And as much as he often rolls his eyes about doing things just because “that’s how it’s always been done”, there are some things about it he really loves. Someone on their knees, in front of friends and family in some beautiful location, asking you to give them the honour of marrying you?

Absolutely fuckin’ dreamy. Lance would love that shit. He would be unashamedly riding that attention high for years. He used to daydream about it, to; talking to his siblings when they were up late, painting their nails and talking shit about whomever for fun. He knows he’s definitely explained ad nauseam his preference for a pretty diamond ring placed on his finger to the backdrop of the sun setting on the waves.

But, as it always does, life does not go according to plan.

His faceless daydreams were only fantasies. There’s nothing wrong with them — fantasies are fun, and can even be a basis for reality — they just didn’t match up with where he ended up! At no point in his life could he ever have expected to fall so deeply in love with the man he’d sworn so vehemently to hate. At no point could he ever have predicted being swept up into a war beyond his greatest comprehension with that man at his side, or to lead a war with that man. He could never have predicted the softness that would bloom between them, the gentle moments that would be just as frequent as the intense competitions.

Honestly, he never could have predicted Keith. Who could have? Keith is… he’s just so much. Of everything. There’s not a single thing he does that he doesn’t do with his whole heart and soul. He cares so deeply and intensely; his love is so all-encompassing… sometimes Lance lies in bed and is rendered breathless by the force of it; of him. He can scarcely believe that he is so lucky, that the universe aligned so carefully, that he has the chance to love Keith and be loved by Keith, in every day and in every way.

It’s a lot. It’s everything, really.

And so that’s why it has to be perfect. Away with the small crowd of friends and family, with the public space and pomp and circumstance — as much as Keith loves their family, and loves indulging Lance (seriously. What Keith wouldn’t do to make Lance happy… it makes Lance giddy just to remember it. He is so, so fucking lucky. He scored), Lance knows he values his privacy. Hell, it took nearly an entire year for anyone else to know that they were dating. Not because Keith was ashamed of him, or because either of them were afraid, but because Keith kind of likes to keep things to himself. He likes it when it’s just him and Lance, when they have inside jokes and secrets and moments that are just theirs.

Lance likes it too, frankly. Plus, there was nothing funnier than the pure outrage on all of their friends’ faces when they realised they’d been blind to Keith and Lance for eleven whole months. Truly a moment Lance has cherished.

All this to say that Lance has been preparing to finally ask Keith to be his husband. He’s told no one — not even Hunk — but several weeks ago he measured Keith’s ring size as he slept, and worked carefully with a jeweller to design something he knew Keith would love. That was the easy part. The harder part has been carving out the right time in both of their schedules; a time when they can give each other their full attention for long enough that Lance can do the asking and then have some time after for… ahem, celebrating.

(Lance has been looking forward to that part especially.)

But finally all the stars aligned — the two of them had a week off after spending three months on a Balmera with restoration efforts — and Lance can put his plan into motion.

The first thing he does is send Keith on some random errands. That buys him a few hours to set up the alcove by their front door — a collage of pictures of them over the years, pinned artfully to the wall; bundles of Keith’s favourite flowers, poppies and California lilies and sunflowers and desert roses; and perhaps most ostentatiously, a goofy banner that Lance hand-painted with the magic question. Is it elegant? Not really. A little tacky? Possibly.

But although Keith would rather surgically remove his tongue than admit it, he eats this shit up. He grew up with Shiro, for Christ’s sake. The man as watched every romcom ever made, and loves them all to pieces. Lance has watched 10 Things I Hate About You with him more times than he can physically count.

Once he’s satisfied with how the alcove is set up, he digs the velvet box out of its hiding place, tucking it carefully into his jeans pocket and settling into the truck to go pick up Keith.

If Lance was following his daydreams, they’d both be dolled up to the nines and heading to some fancy restaurant. Instead, Lance is wearing his dark red shirt that he knows makes Keith cross-eyed and his good jeans that make his legs look long. He knows that Keith is wearing his favourite flannel and his rattiest pair of converse, which Lance has had to literally patch back together because Keith refuses to throw the damn things out.

It fits better, somehow.

“Where are we headed, Casanova?” Keith asks, after trying (and failing) to convince Lance to let him drive. (As if. It’s Lance’s turn. The schedule says so and everything.)

“Surprise,” Lance says vaguely. He glances as surreptitiously as possible into the backseat, making sure that he did, in fact, remember to pack the food and the blankets.

(He did. He has also checked fourteen billion times. He is, although he knows it’s silly, the slightest bit nervous, apparently.)

“C’mon,” Keith prods, sliding a free hand into Lance’s hand. “Can’t I get a hint, baby? Just a little bit?”

“I am trying to drive. Keep that shit up and we’re gonna crash, you walking distraction.”

Keith laughs — cackles, really — but pulls his hand away.

“Loser. If I drove, you could distract me all you wanted and we’d still be fine.”

Lance reaches over blindly to grab Keith’s hand back, bringing it up to his lips and pressing a kiss to the tops of his knuckles.

“Not a chance, babe.”

———

When they finally make it to their destination (after an hour of Keith complaining about the drive, trying to convince Lance to tell him where they’re going, and switching through every available radio station twelve thousand times before he’s satisfied), Lance throws the truck in park and practically sprints to open Keith’s door before he has the chance.

“Dork,” Keith teases, flicking him on the nose as he hops out.

Lance grins. “You love it.”

“You’ll never prove it.” He takes Lance’s offered hand, then looks around. “Where are we?”

Lance hums, carefully swinging the backpack he brought over his shoulders and tugging Keith away from the truck.

“Well, you see, my boyfriend is this massive nerd,” he starts playfully. Keith rolls his eyes, grinning.

“Nerd, you say, as if you don’t have alphabetized samples of cool rocks from every planet we’ve ever been on.”

Lance ignores the jab, plowing right on. “And because he is this massive nerd, I figured he would appreciate frolicking through the desert until we come to a decent spot, then eating this dope ass dinner I made for us —” he pats the backpack — “while watching the meteor shower that’s supposed to be visible tonight.” He grins widely at Keith’s excited gasp. “I know it’s nothing we haven’t seen before a million times, but I thought it’d be nice.”

Keith says nothing, using their joined hands to yank Lance towards him and kiss him soundly.

“Sounds good to me,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to Lance’s lips, his jaw, his throat.

“Keith,” Lance says, breathless. Like everything with them, this has rapidly escalated off-course.

Why are they like this, again?

“We’ve got an itinerary, babe, we’ve gotta — oh, God, do that again.”

He feels Keith’s smirk against the hollow of his throat. “Wouldn’t be the first time we messed our plans in favour of the truck bed, sugar.”

“Itinerary,” Lance tries again, weakly.

“Truck’s right there,” Keith reiterates.

Lance has a lot of discipline, okay?

But Keith is convincing. He knows exactly which buttons of Lance’s to press.

And, if Lance is being entirely honest, he loves indulging Keith as much as Keith loves indulging him.

———

Their food goes cold.

“This is your fault,” Lance says, pointing a fork at the perpetrator in question. “I had this hot and ready to eat, and you stubbornly decided to be a distraction, you dick.”

Keith is entirely unapologetic.

“There was something else that was hot and ready for me to eat,” he says, looking pointedly at Lance’s ass and grinning wolfishly.

Lance smacks the shit out of him with a pillow.

“You are a dog!”

He’s laughing, though, as he says it, so it doesn’t quite have the desired effect. Keith has no qualms with teasing him right back, either, both of them spending as much time eating as they do roasting each other.

God, Lance cannot wait to put a ring on this bitch. The meteor shower better hurry the fuck up so Lance can take them home and get down on one knee, already.

As soon as Lance thinks it, Keith gasps, grabbing Lance’s arms and pointing at the sky.

“Look! It’s starting!”

It’s slow going, at first, barely one flash of light every five minutes, but eventually shooting stars are racing through the sky as thousands of rocks burn to nothing in Earth’s atmosphere.

Lance nudges Keith’s side. “Bet you’re wishing that Hunk brings another dozen eggs to the next diplomatic meeting to throw at people when they say stupid things.”

“There’s no way you knew that!” Keith protests immediately. “I must have spoken out loud!”

“Nope! I just know you, baby.”

“Well, I bet you wished that Allura and Veronica will finally kiss this month so you win the betting pool!”

They spend the rest of the meteor shower like that — frantically shouting out what they think the other wished after each star that shoots by. They’re both right a good half of the time, too.

It makes something warm and fiery ignite in Lance’s belly, to have someone who knows him so deeply. Without even talking about it.

It’s the best thing Lance could possibly wish for.

———

By the time the meteor shower ends, they’ve eaten their food, and it’s something like three in the morning. Keith yawns every few minutes, and doesn’t even bother with the radio on the way home, simply resting his head on the window and closing his eyes for a while. He doesn’t fall asleep — his hand is tangled with Lance’s, and his thumb runs constant lines over the backs of his knuckles — but he’s too tired to be fully awake, either.

Not Lance. Lance feels like he’s buzzing, the breeze from his cracked-open window the only thing keeping him from going supernova. He’s so excited he can barely breathe.

When they finally get home, Lance rushes again to open Keith’s door, who grins tiredly at him and presses a kiss to his cheek before following him inside. Lance takes a deep breath before opening the door, stepping quickly to the alcove and grabbing the ring from his pocket as Keith walks in.

Aaaannd… right past him.

Lance’s jaw drops. Keith is so tired he doesn’t even notice the newly decorated alcove, or even Lance — he simply walks to the kitchen with their picnic supplies. Lance hears him hum as he starts to put their dirty dishes in the dishwasher, their leftovers in the fridge.

“Lance, babe,” he calls, “do you care if I eat the last of the pan frito? It’s better fresh.”

Lance glances down at the ring. He barely holds himself back from cackling with laughter, because of course Keith is so distracted that he didn’t even notice Lance down on one knee.

“How about you come in here for a second, first?” Lance responds, voice shaking with amusement.

“What? No, come here if you want some! I’ll share, but I just mopped the floor yesterday, I don’t want to get crumbs all over it.”

“Keith,” Lance tries again, “come here for a goddamn second, will ya?”

“Alright, Jesus,” Keith grumbles. In what Lance assumes to be spite, he takes a couple minutes, before he finally turns the corner and sees Lance for the first time.

His freezes, the dishtowel he was carrying flutters to the ground.

“L-Lance? What’s going — what —”

“I have a question for you, sweetheart,” Lance says. He grins teasingly. “Would’ve asked earlier, but you walked right by me.”

“Oh my God.”

“You paying attention, now?”

“Oh my God!”

Before Lance can blink, Keith rushes forward, tackling Lance to the ground and pressing kisses all over his face; anywhere he can reach.

“Yes! Yes! Yes —”

Lance sets the ring in his lap so he can grab Keith’s frantic, fluttering hands.

“I haven’t even asked yet, babe.”

“Well, get to it!”

Lance snorts, but complies. “Keith Kogane,” he says, smile softening and gaze steady. “Will you marry me?”

Keith laughs, holding his left hand out to Lance, his right hand wiping the tears that have dropped down his cheeks.

“Yes, Lance McClain, I will marry you,” he chokes out. Lance grins brightly as he slides the ring up Keith’s fourth finger. The second the ring is in place, Keith smashes their mouths together, knocking Lance flat on his back.

He doesn’t mind.

It’s way better than a traditional proposal, anyway.

———

based on this video (ninth slide)

#that video made me LAUGH and i thought about Them immediately #vld #voltron #lance #lance mcclain #keith #keith kogane #klance #established klance #marriage proposal #fluff #banter #adhd keith #keith has adhd #tall keith #my writing #fic #longpost

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lunatic-fandom-space · 7 months

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You know what its past midnight Im gonna make a post critisising acotar despite never having the read the series, the only book of SJMs ive actually read was crescent city but I spend a lot of time in anti acotar circles bc its fun being a little hater sometimes and I think I know enough by now to atleast critise some of the themes. I definitely know more about this series than I should, like I know about that immortal horse whose horse wife tragically died in horse childbirth and then Im pretty sure he died of horse sadness. And yet, despite cari can read being pretty good at explaining magic shit, I still dont know what the hell syphons are or why illyrians have them or why they matter so you really never stop learning huh

Anyway, I wanted to talk about the misogyny within the universe of acotar because its really bad, both in the sense that its just annoying and insufferable to read about even second-hand and in the sense that its badly written. The thing that inspired this was this short piece of flashfiction by @feynessupremacy about an unnamed girl from the hewn city being married off and having a horrible time living in this endless cycle of misogynistic abuse that her mom is still in and that her dauggters will end up in, all powerless to do anything against this kind of systemic sexism. I thought it was good and made its intended point pretty well but it also made me once again realize how borderline comical this series portrayal of misogyny is

Like, okay, once again, I have not read these books myself but it very much seems like the sexism in this world just materialized in the second book, from the summaries Ive watched it straightup seems like it was just not there in the first book. I mean hell, the entire plot hinges on the fact that Tamlin was sending all these fae disguised as fucked up creatures out so that they would hopefully be killed by a woman so she could break the curse, which implies that women being hunters was pretty normal. (Also, dont come at me with any kind of "oh, it doesnt specify the gender of the person who needs to break the curse a guy couldve done it as well", sjm is too insufferably heteronormative to consider that)

So basically what Im saying is, from my perspective it very much seems like sjm put not only systemic misogyny but like, incredibly violent systemic misogyny to the point where women being brutalized is basically completely normal, in her fantasy series for the sake of making a man look good because hes a wittle sad :( about it sometimes which is honestly pretty funny to me

But it gets even funnier because it doesnt even seem like sexism is really a widespread thing ? Like, i have never seen anyone else directly address this but its all I can think about: in the Nightcourt, the misogyny and institutionalized violence against women is literally the worst it possibly can be with genital mutilation and everything and then in the rest of Prythian its just like, not there. There are plenty of women with political power, the queen of adriada comes to mind first, Im pretty sure I read something about a woman from the wintercourt who was in a similar position of power, its unclear to me what all these fuckin priestesses do because theres no focus on the religion at all much less the institution(s) behind that religion, but they have to have some kind of power if theyre anything like priests in our world (although tbh they seem more like nuns to me functionally just with a diffrent name), especially Ianthe who was like a high priestess and directly in charge of Feyre, who shouldve been the most powerful woman in the springcourt by virtue of being with the high lord, Amren and Mor seem to be well respected outside of the NightCourt, their only deity is the MOTHER. Sure, there arent any "official" High Ladies but if being a High Lord entails being chosen by the magic of the land or The Cauldron or The Mother or whatever other kind of magic bullshit and women just dont get to have it for some reason, is that really indicative of the broader culture being sexist, or is that just God, Who Canonically Exists being sexist? Idk about you, but Im leaning towards the latter option

Thats not even mentioning the mortal lands which seem to be ruled by queens exclusively at the time of the story taking place, or Hybern which had Amarantha and I think her sister as well be these high-ranking generals and it wasnt presented as anything unusual. Like, are you telling me that the kingdom whose only value is "we love slavery, we would like to have slavery back" is more progressive than the court of fuckin Feminist King Rhysand?? I Am Going To Turn Into The Joker

Anyway, I think thats all I have to say, please correct me if I got any of this information wrong I cannot stress enough that I have not read these books and dont plan on reading them anytime soon, atleast not in english because reading the term mate a 1000 times sounds like too much for me to bear, atleast in german theyll probably use a term like "Gefährte/in" which doesnt make me think of actual animals

#im öretty sleep deprived so i hope this is coherent enough #anti sjm #anti acotar

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frankencanon · 9 months

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I think it'd be funny if we made Kakashi even younger.

Can you imagine Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura finding out that Kakashi is only a handful of years older than them?!

I mean, with how little we see of his face it's extremely difficult to tell how old he is...

It was one thing when he was prepubescent and short with an unbroken voice, but once his voice dropped and he reached an average adult height... How would anyone be able to tell?

He's strong, highly ranked, mature for his age, and the proper height for an adult with an adult voice. Anyone who didn't already know his age would be liable to mistakenly assume he's older than he actually is, especially with the grey hair.

And it's not like it's out of the realm of possibility for a teenager to be a jounin sensei—take Minato, for example. He was, what, seventeen? And as talented as Minato was, he's nothing compared to Kakashi when it comes to rising through the ranks at a young age.

I'm pretty sure Kakashi broke literally every record there was when it came to "youngest ever [blank]". Academy student, genin, chūnin, jōnin, ANBU, ANBU Captain... Sure, Itachi eventually beat him in one or two of those, but at the time Kakashi was the sole record-holder; There'd never been anyone like him before.

If we just modify Kakashi's already contradictory timeline... Unimportant info below about the details for just how this could potentially work in canon!!

—WAIT. FORGET ALL THAT.

If you want to read my calculations as to how this could canonically work you may direct your attention below, however I have just come up with a far better and far simpler and also quite possibly both funnier and sadder idea:

Time-travel, but not in any way you're thinking...

Most people assume the reason why they didn't hear much of Kakashi's exploits over the years is because he was in ANBU and so everything was Top Secret and extremely covert...

But what if the real reason was because Kakashi had somehow been sent about a decade into the future? Hence explaining how he could be a teenager still when he was once the Yondaime's student.

Also possible: Kakashi was somehow held in stasis for the past decade—sealed, perhaps? Trapped? Or maybe the work of a foreign shinobi's jutsu (kekkei genkai?) that took about a decade or so to break/deactivate...

Or, my personal favorite:

He was investigating the Uzushiogakure ruins and got caught in one of their defensive seals — one that would seal him for a maximum of ten years, with the intention of giving Uzushio shinobi as much time as possible to deal with whatever intruder(s) got caught in the trap.

Without Kushina or Minato or any other Uzumaki seal experts however, deactivating the seal would be basically impossible — luckily, the seal was set up so that once time ran out Kakashi would be automatically released.

And he was! Ten years later, with little baby Naruto all grown up and almost ready to be placed on a genin team — his genin team.

—

AFFOREMENTIONED DUMB CALCULATIONS FOR HOW THIS COULD POTENTIALLY FIT INTO THE CANONICAL TIMELINE BELOW 👇

—

It's probably boring!! You don't have to read it!!

⚠️ You have been warned!! ⚠️

(It's mostly just me brainstorming, honestly...)

—

Genin at five, chūnin at six... Then he stalls at chūnin for a while before eventually advancing to jōnin at twelve (wherein Obito "dies").

He's approximately thirteen when Rin is killed leading to him joining ANBU, and then fourteen when Naruto is born and the Kyūbi is unleashed on the village, causing Minato and Kushina to sacrifice themselves.

In canon, he is then twenty-six years old when he becomes Team 7's jōnin sensei...

For starters, I vote we cut those six years of chūnin limbo before Kakashi becomes jōnin, dropping him to about twenty-or-so.

Then again, this is fanfic—who cares about canon timelines?

If we put him on the hyper-speed fast-track...

4: Academy student

5: Genin

6: Chūnin

7. Jōnin (Obito dies)

8. ANBU (Rin dies)

9. Naruto's birth (Minato & Kushina die)

Is this ridiculous? Yes! But who cares?

9+12=21

Hm... That's not right.

Alright, this is getting a bit annoyingly complicated.

Even if I downgrade Naruto to eleven (because for a long time I was convinced for some reason that Naruto was eleven while the rest of his peers were twelve, and I still have absolutely no clue where I got that idea from) that would still make Kakashi about twenty. Hm...

Ugh, I'll figure this out later. Can't we just hand-wave it?

—No wait, I have an idea:

While modifying his canon timeline to make him younger is a hassle and a half, the fact remains that until we saw Kakashi Gaiden we didn't actually have any details on his backstory...

In other words? The beginning of the series managed just fine without it, so why don't we just throw it out entirely?

Afterall, this fic is about jōnin-sensei Kakashi—the details of his traumatic childhood are irrelevant, and it's not like early fans had that information to work with anyway.

Naruto is canonically younger than Sasuke (who was a baby during the Kyūbi attack) so we shall put him at eleven to give us some leeway.

Now let's say we wanted to make Kakashi somewhere around sixteen to eighteen during canon—that would require him to be five to seven years old when Minato dies.

Now let's compress his timeline some more:

Considering the Konoha 9 all attended the very first chūnin exams after they graduated, I don't see any reason why Kakashi couldn't do the same—and unlike them he's a prodigy so it's basically guaranteed that he'd pass. (And that's assuming he didn't get a field promotion...)

Give him up to a year to become jōnin, and then have him join ANBU almost immediately after.

Some months later, Naruto is born and the Yondaime dies.

To compress it further, I am making his graduation even more ridiculous:

Academy student at three, genin and then chūnin at four, jōnin and ANBU at five. God, can you imagine a five-year-old ANBU? That'd be terrifying. Naruto is born around the time he turns six, and eleven years later Kakashi passes a genin team for the first time and is made a jōnin-sensei at seventeen, just like Minato-sensei was.

It'll take Team 7 a while to realize that, however.

...WAIT A MINUTE.***

Why am I even bothering to promote him prior to Minato's death? Am I, perhaps, an idiot?

Minato becomes his sensei as soon as he graduates to genin at five years old, but before that Kakashi spent a lot of time as his apprentice and they bonded. Shortly after Team 7 is formed the Kyūbi attack happens and Minato dies — the how doesn't matter, so don't worry about it.

The war is over so instead of Kannabi Bridge they go on some other dangerous mission with the same results, except this time the reason Minato isn't there is because he's dead.

They send some other inadequate chūnin or jōnin in his place, but they promptly get killed early on in the mission, perhaps at the same time that Rin gets kidnapped.

Kakashi is chūnin at this point so he naturally takes charge, despite being a five or six year old and Obito being — I don't know, twelve? Significantly older.

Obito dies, then Rin, and this time it's the stupid Sandaime that sticks Kakashi in ANBU like he's an annoying unwanted child that he wants to keep out of sight and thoroughly occupied — at least, until he needs a jōnin sensei for the Kyūbi's Jinchūriki and the Last Uchiha...

So, final version:

Five years old when Minato dies and Naruto is born, and about five or six years old when Obito and Rin die and Kakashi gets stuck in ANBU, followed by eleven years of Naruto growing up while Kakashi's in ANBU makes him... About sixteen to seventeen years old when Kakashi becomes Team 7's jōnin sensei.

To Kakashi, this feels almost poetic. (Same age as Minato-sensei was...)

#hatake kakashi #kakashi hatake #kakashi sensei #kakashi #naruto #team 7 #au #naruto au #fanfic idea #fanfic prompt #fan fic ideas #fanfiction ideas #fanfiction prompts #fan fiction idea #naruto fic #naruto fanfiction #kakashi fanfiction #kakashi fic #kakashi gaiden

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erinelliotc · 5 days

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Which dub you likes better? Portuguese or english?

Oh, I loved getting this question! I have a lot to say on this subject because I really like talking about dubbing.

Sit down kids, and get ready for a little infodump about the Brazilian/Portuguese dubbing of Ed, Edd n Eddy! (the show has never been dubbed in Portugal. The only Portuguese dub is the Brazilian one, so referring to this EEnE dubbing as "Brazilian" or "Portuguese" is the same thing, same dub).

** I edited this post to make some additions. They're highlighted in purple **

Brazilian adaptation

First of all, it's important to say that here in Brazil, "Ed, Edd n Eddy" is "Du, Dudu e Edu". I already explained it here, but I'll explain it again. The Brazilian/Portuguese version of Edward is Eduardo, and the common nicknames are Dudu and Edu, so they just had to create the nickname "Du" (at least I've never seen someone called Eduardo being called Du) and there you go, we have the perfect adaptation! We lost the "Double D" nickname as we didn't have the issue of "Ed" and "Edd" sounding the same, so they just didn't see the need to keep it. So every time he's called "Double D" they just dub it as "Dudu" too. To me it's one of the best adaptations because it wouldn't sound very natural to call them "Edward/Eds" and it makes a lot of sense:

Ed = Du (1 D) Edd = Dudu (2 D's) Eddy = Edu ("Ed" with a sound at the end)

They even solved the issue of Ed and Edd sounding the same (even though I think Double D is a great and cute nickname and I really like this addition and miss it in the Brazilian dub, but I assume the reason it was added was in order to solve this issue).

Some funny things:

In the first episode (The Ed-Touchables) there's a dubbing error in a scene where Eddy calls Ed by his original name instead of "Du". I don't know how this went unnoticed because he calls him "Du" at all other times. It's only in the scene where Eddy says "Ed! Don't move! And stop giggling!".

There are also some errors in other episodes where they mix up the Eds (it only happens in the first season(s) if I remember correctly). There is, for example, a scene in "Who, What, Where, Ed" (season 1, episode 21) in which Lee in the Brazilian dub mistakenly refers to Eddy by Edd's Brazilian name (Dudu), and this scene kinda pisses me off because of the error but it's so freaking funny because besides them mistaking Eddy for Double D, they also changed her line to something that would only make sense if she was referring to Eddy. She says "Eddy's such a weasel", and they dubbed it as "O Dudu é o mais gostoso" ("Double D's the hottest [of them]"), which doesn't make any sense since Eddy's her crush and it just cracks me up, both for the error and for the unexpectedly somewhat inappropriate line for a kid's show (I think that here in Brazil calling someone "hot" may be a little more inappropriate than in English, at least I guess...?).

Brazilian dub

The Brazilian dub has a very special place in my heart because it was the one I grew up with, so it gives me a lot of nostalgia, and honestly it's a very good dub in general (I think Brazilian voice actors do an excellent job besides the errors because they're great at making dubs with a lot of emotion and naturalness).

There are even some scenes that I find funnier in the Brazilian dub because the voice intonation is stronger/more dramatic/has more emotion, or because they changed the lines to something funnier (I'm not a fan of changing lines, but I don't mind changes if it's just to make the line stronger and the original meaning and essence of what was said is maintained). Some examples:

"A Glass of Warm Ed" (season 1, episode 19) - Double D saying "Oh dear. An intruder. Eating all the food out of my refrigerator. In bare feet!" in Portuguese sounds funnier to me because his voice intonation in "In bare feet!" seems a little more terrified. This scene always gets me because of the way he talks. I love Double D’s concept of things escalating from bad to worse. Like: An intruder = oh how inconvenient Eating all my food = oh no, that’s terrible! In bare feet! = good lord! that’s TOO MUCH! COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE!!!

"Eds-Aggerate" (season 1, episode 23) - As I said, Kevin's Brazilian voice sounds much funnier to me, so I'll give just one of the countless examples of this because otherwise I'd have to mention all of his lines. Kevin says "Mucky... boys?" — which was dubbed here as "Garotos primatas" ("Primate boys") — and "Baloney!" — which was dubbed here as "Mentira!" ("Lies!/You're lying!") —, and I just love the way it sounds in Portuguese.

"Avast Ye Eds" (season 1, episode 26) - Eddy's line in Portuguese sounds funnier to me because his voice intonation and line seem ruder, more impatient and more tired. In the original dub he says "Hey kid, I'm on my break. Do you mind?", and it was dubbed as "Ô garoto, eu tô de folga. Não enche o saco" ("Hey kid, I'm on a break. Get off my back/Get out of my face/Don't piss me off" [I don't know which one is the best way to translate it]).

"Knock, Knock, Who's Ed?" (season 2, episode 3) - This is one of the best examples I can give of line change that just makes it funnier without losing its original meaning. In the scene where Ed offers a candy stuck to his leg and says "I got this one for Christmas", it was dubbed as "Essa tá aqui desde que eu era bebê" ("This one's been here since I was a baby"). The fun of this line is to express that the candy has been stored on his leg for a very long time, so this change just amplified this, increasing the time the candy would be there and making the line much more absurd and funny.

"One + One = Ed" (season 2, episode 4) - Double D's line in Portuguese sounds much funnier to me because they changed the line to something more direct and less soft (even though Double D's a gentle, delicate and polite character, he's also brutally honest and sometimes says some unexpected harsh things quite bluntly, so I don't think it was out of character for him). In the original dub he says "I best tend to his medical needs. Excuse me", and it was dubbed as "Eu vou ver o que sobrou do Edu, tá? Um instante" ("I'm going to see what's left of Eddy, okay? Just a moment"). This line makes me imagine him literally picking up the pieces of Eddy. I don't know, I'm a very visual and literal person, so this line sounds really funny to me, especially with him saying it with a smile.

"Floss Your Ed" (season 2, episode 8) - Double D saying "Plain butter?" in Portuguese sounds much funnier to me because his voice intonation seems more terrified. In the original dub he just sounds confused and speechless to me, whereas in Portuguese he seems more disconcerted, shocked, perplexed, astonished, intrigued and disturbed that Rolf would suggest that Ed eat plain butter. I like this because Double D's a character who's easily impressed and shocked by things and tends to have strong reactions to absurd situations or even situations that aren't considered absurd to others. To me it makes perfect sense that he'd be terrified and have a reaction that highlights the absurdity of the act of eating plain butter. To me it's like it went from "Plain… butter? 😶" to "Plain butter!? 😨".

"Honor Thy Ed" (season 2, episode 17) - I was a little disappointed when I watched the original episode because I really thought Eddy said what he said in the Brazilian dub and I really liked that line, but then I found out it was actually a line change. Ed says "You scared Double D, Eddy" and Eddy says "I did, didn't I? C'mon, I got an idea", and it was dubbed as: Ed: "Assustou o magricela" ("You scared the skinny guy") / Eddy: "Ah, eu sei disso, Du. Adoro deixar ele nervoso" ("Oh, I know that, Ed. I love making him nervous"). It sounded so teasing, a bit EddEddy, I really loved it and I was totally convinced it was the original line because it sounded so much like something Eddy would say.

"Jingle Jingle Jangle" (Christmas Special episode) - Okay, so let's talk about really inappropriate dubbing. There's a scene where Rolf originally says "You have pulled Rolf's eggplant, half-man, half-woman Ed boy", and it was dubbed as "Impressionou o órgão em formato de berinjela do Rolf, Edu" ("You impressed Rolf's eggplant-shaped organ, Eddy"). I think it's so funny how explicit that line got, but it kinda saddens me that they cut out the "half-man, half-woman" part.

Kevin's Brazilian voice is one of the funniest to me. I'd say Alexandre Moreno is one of the most famous Brazilian voice actors with one of the most memorable voices. He dubs Adam Sandler (the work for which he's best known), dubbed Ben Stiller, Steve Carell, Antonio Banderas, Josh Duhamel, Martin Freeman, dubbed Puss in Boots from Shrek, Alex from Madagascar, Syndrome from The Incredibles, Dracula from Hotel Transylvania, Flapjack, Flint from Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, Denzel Crocker from The Fairly OddParents, Adam from Bee Movie, Numbuh 9 from Kids Next Door, Krusty from The Simpsons, and many others. Even though I love Kevin's original voice (and especially his laugh, which I particularly prefer in the original voice), I think the Brazilian one sounds funnier and more informal.

Sarah's Brazilian voice actress did many important and memorable voices too. Iara Riça was the main voice actress for Harley Quinn, Brenda Song, Tara Strong, dubbed Tails, Blossom from Powerpuff Girls, Frankie from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, Cree from Kids Next Door, Fionna from Adventure Time, Tecna from Winx Club, Courtney from Total Drama, Charlotte from The Princess and the Frog, Princess Su from Mulan 2, Yumi from Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi, and many others). She was one of my favorite voice actresses, but she unfortunately passed away on April 27, 2021. I think her voice was perfect for Sarah. She was able to do annoying and striking voices just right.

Eddy's Brazilian voice is quite different, but in the end I think it suits him because it's a very strong and chaotic voice too. Ricardo Juarez dubbed Will Ferrell, Taz, Johnny Bravo, Kratos from God of War, Melman from Madagascar, Barney from The Simpsons, Fuzzy from Powerpuff Girls, and some others.

Lee's Brazilian voice was also a voice that I think was really great for her. Nádia Carvalho was a famous and remarkable Brazilian actress and voice actress. She dubbed Bette Midler, Queen Latifah, Miranda Richardson, Edna from The Incredibles, Dexter's mom from Dexter's Laboratory, and many others. She also unfortunately passed away on July 11, 2022.

Fun facts:

Double D and Rolf share the same Brazilian voice actor and I think he did a great job with both of them. His voice makes Double D sound a little hoarse, something that I think suits the character and contributes to making some lines funnier and stronger/more dramatic. Luiz Sérgio Vieira dubbed Static from Static Shock, Matsuda from Death Note, Numbuh 4 from Kids Next Door, Bloo from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, Timmy from The Fairly OddParents, Jonathan from Stranger Things, Plagg from Miraculous Ladybug, Ralph from The Simpsons, Gibby from iCarly, and many others.

Nazz's first Brazilian voice actress is a mystery. We have no information on who she was, and she dubbed her for like, almost half of the show (I still need to check if it's correct, but according to the wiki she dubbed her in: season 1, season 2, the first half of season 3 and one episode from season 4), being replaced by Sylvia Salustti, another memorable voice (she dubbed Tweety from Looney Tunes, Pearl from Steven Universe, Rapunzel from Tangled, Eva from Wall-E, Foxy from Chicken Little, Ring Ring from Pucca, Amy from The Big Bang Theory, Rachel from Glee, Phoebe from Friends, and many others).

English/original dub x Brazilian dub

However, I prefer the original dub. I really love the original voices, especially Eddy's (God bless Tony Sampson). Most of Eddy's scenes are always funny to me just because of his voice tone, everything he says is funny to me because of the exaggerated, loud and chaotic way he talks. A voice that I think is much better in the original dub is Jonny's. I don't dislike the Brazilian voice, but it's just too... normal. Jonny's original voice suits his personality very well because it shows how nuts and lunatic he is. Jimmy's original voice also sounds a little more, well... gay.

I think the EEnE crew did an excellent job and I'm so grateful that Danny Antonucci was the pain-in-the-ass perfectionist guy telling them to repeat their lines until it was good enough because we really got a show with wonderful and memorable lines. I really love it when people are genuinely passionate about things and really care about making them perfect in an obsessive way. I'm very much like that... and of course Antonucci is too, that's his Double D side. I also love how this is reflected in the fandom. I see that this fandom is full of people who don't like the show in a simple and shallow way, but in an obsessed and passionate way (it's one of my reasons for thinking that EEnE is a show that primarily appeals to neurodivergent people. We just hyperfixate on things, in this case EEnE, and cling to them like they're the most important and amazing thing in the world to us).

I'd say the only voice that leaves me torn about which one I think is better is Kevin's. But apart from him, I think all the original voices are better, but please don't get me wrong. As I said, I love the Brazilian dub, I just prefer the original one, that's all. I'd say that the original dub is 10/10 and the Brazilian dub is like 8/10.

Things in the Brazilian dub that I don't like

There are some things that aren't necessarily bad, it's just something that I personally don't like for particular reasons and personal preferences.

One of my biggest complaints about the Brazilian dub is something very specific: Ed's dub. I'm a perfectionist, very obsessive, so I like dubbing being as close as possible to the original one and suffering the less changes as possible (I think changes when translating a show/movie/series/book/game/etc are welcome for the reasons I previously explained, and also to adapt to our context and culture, such as changing the names of the Eds), and that's why I tend to prefer watching everything in the original dub, and even when it's dubbed in Portuguese I like to watch it with subtitles (for this same reason, and also because I have a hard time just listening to things because I probably have Central Auditory Processing Disorder. I wish I could turn on subtitles in real life too xD). Ed must be the character who has undergone the most line changes, I believe intending to make him more goofy and dumb, but at the same time I don't understand the need because his original lines were already very random and strange. Apparently, this happened due to the voice actor's own personal decision (I want to make it clear that I think the voice actor is really great and remarkable, but in this particular work I don't agree with his choices for the lines). Clécio Souto is a famous Brazilian actor, voice actor and announcer. He dubbed Chris Evans, Andy Samberg, James Franco, Jared Leto, Kel from Kenan & Kel, Castiel from Supernatural, Banana Joe from The Amazing World of Gumball, Lenny from Shark Tale, and many others. He created 3 catchphrases for Ed that he used very often in place of the original lines, which I genuinely can't understand because Ed already had catchphrases, so why not just keep them? According to him they wouldn't be funny to us, but I don't understand why he thinks so. Well, so in the Brazilian dub, Ed loses his original catchphrases. He no longer talks all the time about buttered toast and gravy, and his lines about chickens remained, but were changed to "galinha com quiabo" ("chicken with okra") (a Brazilian dish), which I really dislike because to me the point is that he likes chickens themselves, as animals, alive, and not as food. Him saying "Who's there?" was also replaced by one of his new catchphrases, "Nem doeu" ("It didn't hurt").

Here's a video of him talking about it:

Translation of what he says in the video:

The character became known for the 3 line changes that I invented. Exactly, this one, Ed. I said "I love chicken with okra!". It didn't have that in the original. I don't remember [what he said in the original]. I change lines so much... I already look and say "I'm not gonna say that because it won't be funny to us. I'm gonna say something else", then "I love chicken with okra". Every time he bumped into something, he said something stupid or didn't even speak and had his back turned, I said "It didn't hurt!". A line change of mine too, "It didn't hurt". It became a catchphrase. And the other one was "Cute/pretty" [I don't know a proper way to translate it]. "Aw, I'm cute/pretty!", which was his too and didn't exist [in the original]. All line changes, all line changes.

There are so many line changes that I won't be able to mention them all, so here are a few examples, but keep in mind that there were A LOT of line changes in every episode:

"An Ed Too Many" (season 1, episode 11) - Instead of saying "And she's a good speller", Ed was dubbed saying "Ele vai ter um fim desgraçado" ("He's gonna have a disgraceful end"). The voice actor thought it'd be funnier to have Ed respond like a jealous older brother trying to protect his younger sister, and I must admit I found it very funny, especially because he speaks in a very normal way and not with an angry voice tone.

"Look Into My Eds" (season 1, episode 13) - Instead of saying "book" and "buttered toast" when Double D asks what he sees in the images, he says "meleca" ("booger") and "salsicha estragada" ("spoiled sausage"). And in the scene where Eddy asks about the hypnotizing wheel and Ed says it was "buttered toast", it was dubbed as "a black lollipop".

"A Boy and his Ed" (season 1, episode 16) - Instead of Eddy saying "Be Kevin's friends? We'd have a better chance of Ed growing a chin" and Ed saying "I wish I had 4 stomachs", it was dubbed as: Eddy: "Ser amigo do Kevin? Seria muito mais fácil se o Du deixasse crescer uma barba" ("Be Kevin's friend? It'd be much easier for Ed to grow a beard") / Ed: "Será que eu ia ficar bonitinho de barba?" ("I wonder if I'd look cute/pretty with a beard"). I really dislike this line change because they cut out the joke about Ed not having a chin, and removed him having a completely random line that has no connection with what Eddy said, something that's part of his character since he's supposed to be the distracted one, and thus, have nonsense lines and random thoughts.

"One + One = Ed" (season 2, episode 4) = At the end of the episode, instead of referencing the events that occurred previously by saying "Jimmy! You got your line back! Is it on wrong?", "Baby sister! Take your mouth off again" and "It's stuck", he was dubbed saying "Jimmy! Você sentou ao contrário. É pra lá, bobão" ("Jimmy! You sat backwards. It's that way, silly"), "E aí, maninha chata. Vamos brincar?" ("What's up, annoying sister. Let's play?") and "Ih, engasgou" ("Sheesh, she choked"). I honestly don't understand why the voice actor changed these lines. It just makes Ed look like he's being completely nonsensical not only to the other kids but to us too, because the fun of that scene was that he seemed crazy to the kids because they don't know the context of the things he's doing and saying, and not him being really random.

"Stop, Look and Ed" (season 2, episode 16) - Instead of saying "Why's Double D wearing pantyhose on his head?", Ed was dubbed saying "Tá parecendo o coelhinho da páscoa!" ("He looks like the Easter Bunny!"), which was very creative indeed.

"Your Ed Here" (season 4, episode 13) - Ed's classic line after the classic kiss scene "One is a lonely number, Double D" was dubbed as "O 1 é um número só, não é, Dudu?" ("1 is a single number, isn’t it, Double D?"). The biggest change was in the intonation of his voice, so instead of it being a sad statement, it turned into Ed just asking a random and stupid question. "One is a lonely number" may sound strange at first glance, but it's clear he means he felt left out.

The feeling I have is as if in the moments when Ed should have random lines they turned into lines with more sense, and in the lines with more sense they turned into random lines. Anyway, enough talking about Ed's dub. Despite everything I've pointed out, I don't consider it a bad dub. As I said, it's just a matter of my personal preference. The voice actor just wanted to give the character a boost, a little bit of his special touch, and I respect that.

Kevin had a second voice actor in some episodes (Duda Espinoza), which bothered me because I usually don't like voice actor changes, especially if the other voice sounded much better to me (I mean, it was fucking Alexandre Moreno. It sucks to just take away a remarkable voice like his), but at least it was only in a few episodes, so it didn't bother me that much. The change in Nazz's voice actress didn't bother me because both voices suited her to me.

I really love all the Brazilian voices (some more than others), I think they all suit the characters, even the ones that aren't so similar to the original voices. But there's a voice that was one of the worst choices I've ever seen in dubbing: Eddy's brother's voice. Honestly, this was their only really BAD choice in choosing a voice actor. Bro's literally an adult and in the Brazilian dub he sounds like a kid/teenager, because he was in fact dubbed by one! @eenedump already talked about it on Twitter, and it's true. Nothing against the guy, Luciano Monteiro is a great voice actor and did and does amazing dubbing (like Finn from Adventure Time, Freddie from iCarly, Zack and Cody, Lewis from Meet the Robinsons, Baljeet from Phineas and Ferb, and many others), but he just wasn't a good choice for Bro. He was a literal kid/teen at the time! 14 years old! Even the characters that are actually kids are dubbed by adults, so why would they choose someone who's actually a kid and sounds like a kid (if he at least sounded like an adult, age wouldn't be an issue) to dub the only adult who appears in the show? I can't see any explanation for this decision.

Now, a thing that REALLY haunted me in the Brazilian dub, disturbed me even more than Bro's voice, was in the Valentine's special episode "Hanky Panky Hullabaloo". The strangest, most disconcerting and unexplainable thing happened when I was watching it and it made me very confused, uncomfortable and concerned for the rest of the episode: Marie and May's voice actresses simply swapped places. I honestly can't think of any reason for that happening. Like, I hate when voice actors change, but I understand that it can happen because for some reason the first one can't voice the character anymore or just can't in some episodes. But this!? This is completely nonsense. What happened? Did everyone, including themselves, forget which Kanker they dubbed? There's no logical explanation and I've never seen this happening before in any other dub. Seriously, imagine watching Ed, Edd n Eddy almost in its entirety, with two characters having the same voices from the beginning, and suddenly you're hearing May's voice coming out of Marie's mouth and Marie's voice coming out of May's mouth. There's no other way to describe this occurrence other than Double D's classic line in "3 Squares and an Ed" (season 3, episode 6): "That's disturbing". I felt like I was in an alternate reality.

And in "May I Have This Ed?" (season 6, episode 1), Marie's voice actress dubbed May in the scene where she says "How about you get your claws off my man, boyfriend-stealer!", but in the previous scene when May says "Hey!" she seems to have been dubbed by the right voice actress. Again, disturbing.

There are some other minor things in the Brazilian dub that kinda bother me:

Double D sounds a little less formal, especially in the first seasons. A problem that happened in the Brazilian dub is that many words that Double D says in English that would be excessively formal are actually common words in Portuguese (to get around this and maintain the character's characteristic of having a sophisticated vocabulary, I'd try as much as possible to replace the words that Double D originally used with more unknown and difficult synonyms in Portuguese). There are times when Ed or Eddy shouldn't understand what he said or should get it wrong, but to us it wouldn't make sense that they wouldn't understand because Double D didn't say anything difficult to understand. I already gave an example of this in a post about the classic "Eddy, I fear they're becoming amorous!" line from "Home Cooked Eds" (season 2, episode 11). "Amorous" (amoroso(s) / amorosa(s)) is a very common word in Portuguese with a very normal meaning, not related to anything sexual at all, just meaning someone who's affectionate or sweet. For this reason, I made a line change to another word that would be more formal and carry a sexual meaning (in the Brazilian dub he just uses the word "amorosas"). Another example is in "Who Let the Ed In?" (season 2, episode 10), when Double D says "I'm at quite a quandary" and Eddy says "Forget your laundry". In English there are both the words "quandary" and "dilemma", but in Portuguese we only have the word "dilema", which is also a common word and which I still haven't been able to think of how to adapt to rhyme with something that Eddy would get wrong (in the Brazilian dub there's no joke with him getting it wrong, Eddy just understands what Double D says). And another example is in "Shoo Ed" (season 2, episode 20), when Eddy uses the word "provoke" and Double D's impressed that he knows that word. Again, a completely common word in Portuguese since we don't have the word "teasing", we only have "provocar".

Something unfortunately inevitable in all dubbings and adaptations but which bothers me anyway is the jokes that only make sense in English. As I'm subtitling the episodes, I'm coming across a very large number of jokes that I have no idea how to adapt into Portuguese. A good example of this problem is the classic "I'd swear, but standards won't let me" joke from "Ed Overboard" (season 4, episode 7). The fun of this joke is centered on exploring the dubious and ambiguous meaning of the word "swear", which can mean either "promise" or "express anger in a very rude and inappropriate way", something that doesn't exist in Portuguese, we just have different words for each of that. Since there was no way to adapt it, it was dubbed as "Até faria, mas não tô afim não" ("I'd do it, but I don't feel like it").

Something similar to the previous problem is lines that should rhyme but the rhyme just can't happen. In "Nagged to Ed" (season 1, episode 2), Eddy says "Nice head, Ed" and he even highlights the fact that it rhymed, but in Portuguese the word "head" doesn't rhyme with Du or Ed, so the scene just seems like Eddy's being stupid and saying that something that doesn't rhyme does rhyme (which honestly isn't that out of character for him as he's shown to be quite stupid at times, but the loss of this rhyme particularly bothers me).

There are some errors every now and then, but the dub errors are not even close to being a big reason for my rating 8/10 because they're not that frequent. However, every time they happen it bothers me. An example is in "Mirror, Mirron, on the Ed" (season 2, episode 22) when Eddy says "Once upon an observation of this small rock, I have discovered it actually mutated from a big rock", and it was dubbed as "Após observação desta pequena pedra, eu descobri que na verdade ela se transformou em uma grande pedra" ("After the observation of this small rock, I have discovered that it actually turned into a big rock"), like... what?

Anyway, that's what I had to say. I love both dubs, I love the Brazilian dub despite the things I mentioned, but in the end I think the original dub is better.

#ed edd n eddy #ededdneddy #ed edd and eddy #eene #brazilian #brazil #brazilian dub of eene #eene brazilian dub #eene dub #du dudu e edu #du dudu edu #dududueedu #dududuedu #danny antonucci #tony sampson #eene crew

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ratfuzz · 9 months

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✫stan, eric and kenny with kitchen witch reader headcanons✫

a/n: kyle one!! finally got to other boys. there's a liiittle bit of suggestive theme and drug joke in kenny one. characters are aged up, reader is gender neutral

stan marsh

doesn't really care about you being a kitchen witch, be who you want to be, believe in what you want to believe

making him special coffee/tea every morning

he started to hate waking up early a bit less (or maybe it's just you being by his side)

he's a kisser, he's a hugger, so expect at least one kiss on a cheek while you cook (will not hug you when you do this without consent tho)

s o u p

make him soup

or make soup with him together, that's nice too

with something silly like veggies in shape of something or just chicken and star soup

you two sometimes fight about who's making breakfast today, but you know, this is not serious of course (either way you win even if he's the one cooking it for the most part)

helps you carve or burn sigils in spoons and things

i'd say he needs the same thing as kyle, something with anti-anxiety spell, but also something that generally will help him with sleep

eric cartman

you probably picked him up by making something with a love spell (it would be funnier if it was blood love spell with espresso, but it would work better with a cake)

lmao, you didn't even have to put a spell on it, he's probably hooked just by your cooking

if you tell him about the fact that you're a witch he'd act like this all is total bullshit, but then ask if you can make something poisonous (of course you can, but it doesn't have to do anything with you been a kitchen witch) or with a curse ((don't fucking do it, though he loves you, it doesn't mean he will not turn you in to cops if something goes wrong i didn't tell you this))

prefers your pastry, but basically loves everything you make

likes looking at you while you cook (will not help you)

even more curious about sigils than kyle

but in the way that he doesn't really trust you (don't blame him, there's a lot of reasons for him to not trust people)

making sigils with eric, so he knows for sure meaning of them

tbh he's really impatient when it comes to you cooking, he doesn't understand why you prefer to take your time with cooking even if you can make it faster and doesn't listen when you explain

at least it looks like it

can bring up something you said later and it kind of surprises you

tries to be less bitchy with you later on

definitely asks you to make something for him with specific sigil for it

kenny mccormick

if you will not make him kfc wings recreation, i will haunt you in your dreams

doesn't really have a preference in your cooking

kenny is most likely the only one of main 4 to remember everything you say about witchery (he's just generally a good listener i think)

would make some type of sigil for shits and giggles (maybe literally)

love spells with emphasis on better sex life aren't needed, lol, but he would totally ask you for this as part of roleplay

ate all your donuts with sugar powder and tried to get away with it by saying that powder on his clothes is cocaine

if you cook together, he will always be distracted by your beauty, sometimes it's better to just let him sit in the kitchen with you

really likes how aprons look on you

so yeah another reason to wear them

any kind spell will do, boy needs more nice things in his life

making forever weed brownies together <3

a/n: honestly, i thought i will never write anything for kenny. wow. cool. we'll see, maybe i will make one with girls or butters/marjorine idkidk

#south park x reader #south park x y/n #south park x you #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh x y/n #stan marsh x you #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman x y/n #eric cartman x you #kenny mccormick x reader #kenny mccormick x y/n #kenny mccormick x you

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tobiasdrake · 20 days

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Any love for the beginning of the anime, the Dragon Ball run? I just started and it's pretty charming honestly.

The original Dragon Ball hunt has its ups and downs. The biggest down, of course, being the uncomfortable handling of Bulma at times (as well as Chi-Chi's entire character design).

But setting that aside, it also serves as the foundation for the series to come. Dragon Ball wouldn't be what it is if it hadn't built on top of this goofy little Journey to the West parody that started it all.

When I think of iconic Dragon Ball relationships, Goku and Bulma's friendship is the number 1. Everything Dragon Ball is, has ever been, or will ever be, all started right here with a teenage girl shooting a little boy in the face with a gun.

Goku is unmistakably the main character of Dragon Ball. Characters come in and out of the series based on who is in his orbit at a given time. Even when the series tries to be about Gohan later on, it still winds up being about Goku. The universe revolves around him.

Bulma was the first to enter his orbit, and remains arguably the most important to this day. Characters compete over and over to be the other important Fighty Guy or Guys in a given scene, battle, or storyline. But there has never been another character like Bulma. In the Dragon Ball mythos, she is irreplaceable.

The strength of their lasting relationship is built on the foundations set up in this arc. Bulma is the driving force of the story, with much of its interesting character development coming from the growing dynamic between the self-absorbed and amoral Bulma, and this feral creature of a child she manipulated into accompanying her.

The later context that Bulma's a privileged heiress to a megacorporate fortune explains a lot and only makes things like Goku offering her centipede-flavored roast wolf even funnier.

Seriously, I know I'm harping on about this but I cannot stress enough how much the interplay between these two characters carries this arc.

But it's not just Bulma. This arc also sees the introduction of the Muten-Roshi, or "Old Heavenly Master of Martial Arts" - and the source of Sun Wukong's Somersault Cloud, Kintoun aka the Flying Nimbus in the dub.

Bulma laughs, but Greatest Heretic in the Universe fares little better when it's her turn.

Bulma, you're the best. But you are right this moment manipulating a naive and unassuming child to trick him out of a family heirloom. You have about as much chance of getting on that cloud as Tony Stark has of ever being worthy to lift Mjolnir.

...of course, in about a year's time, she'll have an answer for that. It wouldn't be Bulma if she wasn't using her genius super-intellect and irreverent science to bypass your mystical buddhist gunk. Bulma once managed to fly to God's Temple in Heaven in a plane. Fuck you.

It's hilarious that the character she's based on is a monk.

This arc also sees the introduction of Yamcha and, by association, our first real glimpse of the martial arts battles that the series would become known for.

Yamcha has the distinguished honor of being the first person to ever seriously threaten Goku in a fight.

Granted, it doesn't last long before Goku breaks him so hard he bounces Yamcha's face off of the fourth wall.

Though it's ultimately Bulma who vanquishes Yamcha.

Between the Muten-Roshi and Yamcha, everything that is the Tenkaichi Budokai and the martial arts crew grows out of these early introductions.

The mini-venture to Mt. Frypan sees the introduction of the fearsome barbarian Gyumao or the "Ox Demon King", terror of the realm, famous for looting and pillaging the surrounding territory.

It goes surprisingly well. We also get what may be the biggest and most far-reaching moment for Goku's future from this arc. He doesn't even know it at the time, but Goku takes a critical step at Mount Frypan in defining the course of the rest of his future. After this moment, his life will never be the same again.

He learns the Kamehameha. The biggest staple of his martial arts career, and something he will carry with him for years to come.

Also he gets engaged.

But that's less important. Goku doesn't even know what they're talking about. Some thirty or forty years later, I'm still not sure he truly understands what they agreed to here.

Sorry, Chi-Chi, but Goku is an ace. Despite Toei's best efforts to heteronormalize him in anime filler.

Toriyama had no real long-term plans for Dragon Ball when he was first writing all of this. But he laid the groundwork of so much that was to come. Mind you, not everything that happened on this journey would ultimately carry future weight.

This is just about the only time Oolong is ever relevant to the story. For the rest of the series, he winds up hanging out as an artifact of the first arc, but rarely amounts to much ever again.

Puar doesn't get off much better, but he does get a moment of relevancy at the Uranai Baba tournament so that's something, at least.

Though while his time in the spotilght is slim, Oolong does serve to give us a solid moment of characterization for the vastly more important Bulma.

That is, of course, when Bulma one-ups her previous manipulation of Goku by enslaving a sentient being. Holy shit.

It's easy to overlook this because Oolong's a little terror. He was a ten-year-old kid masquerading as some sort of ancient monster beast in order to kidnap village girls.

A story, I should note, that the dub does no favors to on account of Oolong being voice-acted like a forty-year-old man. One of the weirder consequences to come out of Z getting dubbed before the first anime. He is actually supposed to be younger than Goku.

So there's a punitive angle to Oolong being karmically forced to come with Goku and Bulma. But. Still. Y'know. Bulma.

The final mini-arc introduces us to the closest thing this arc has to a villain: The utterly ridiculous Pilaf-Daio or "Great King Pilaf", ruler of approximately two subjects.

Pilaf doesn't have a lot of staying power, but he does come back from time to time simply because... Well, he's Dragon Ball's most harmless villain. Pilaf is effectively a self-important child with delusions of grandeur. Aspiring to world domination via Shenron and yet surprisingly innocent and naive.

As an aside, I've always found it funny how much Mai sticks out like a sore thumb in their group. Pilaf is a weird little monster elf clown boy. Shu is a dog boy who is also a ninja. And then Mai is an utterly normal woman wearing a trenchcoat.

There's this thing in character design where male characters can be anything under the sun, any sort of eldritch or monstrous or cool or glamorous or wicked design under the sun, but then female characters are often just things like "Woman with hat" and "Woman in skirt" and "Woman in plate armor".

Like you'll have male orcs who are these huge beastly monsters with sharp tusks and grotesque bald heads with horns. And then female orcs who are female humans but green.

The Pilaf gang shine a bit of a spotlight on that dynamic, don't they? XD

But I digress. Point is, the Pilaf Gang are goofy fun. So much so that the anime tried to give the arc more connectivity by adding Mai and Shu to a lot of the preceding mini-ventures too - Although, since they were filler, they weren't able to influence the plot in any meaningful way.

These characters keep coming back because there's something that's just fun about a set of recurring troublemakers. They're the Team Rocket of Dragon Ball.

Of course, this opening arc also has one last piece of groundwork to unknowingly lay for the future: A major hint at what will become Goku's Saiyan heritage.

This is one of the biggest recurring plot points in Dragon Ball. If Goku looks at a full moon, he becomes the Oozaru; A horrifyingly powerful monster that killed his Grandpa Gohan.

Goku doesn't even know that the monster is him; That he, Goku, killed his beloved grampa is a piece of information that dangles over him like a Sword of Damocles as the series progresses.

Though there's also a really interesting implication here buried in the fact that Gohan warned Goku about this in the first place.

Gohan used to warn Goku against ever looking at the full moon. The implication being that one day, Goku messed up and saw it. Then he became the Oozaru, destroyed his home and the surrounding area, and killed Gohan.

But it's interesting that Gohan knew about the full moon and could warn Goku in the first place. The only way he could have known is if it had happened before. The day Goku killed Gohan must not have been the first time he saw the full moon and turned. Gohan had survived at least one Oozaru incident before the one that killed him.

I dunno, that's just interesting to think about.

When Goku does finally turn, this is the most serious the arc's ever been.

FURY OF THE MONKEY KING, THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING

The fight with the Oozaru is short-lived but will have far-reaching ramifications for Goku going forward. This is probably the biggest thing to be set up in the whole arc.

It's a goofy little tale through a silly little world, that unknowingly planted so many seeds and laid groundwork for so much of what Dragon Ball would become. The (failed and yet sort of succeeded) mission to get Bulma a magic dragon-granted boyfriend almost feels like a minor footnote compared to all the storylines that would follow in its wake. But Dragon Ball would never have become what it did without this opening act.

#dragon ball

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