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#but i might be wrong there it's been a while since i was deep into japanese stuff
exhaslo · 2 days
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Can you do a small fluff fic where miguel and Rabbit reader finally get their baby?
Miguel's heart would melt when he sees his child for the first time and probably cries a lot out of happiness.
Yessssssssssssh, this one might be a little short compared to the others!
Pt1, PT2, PT3 <<<smut
Warning: None, just fluff
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The day you found out you were pregnant was one of the happiest days of your life!
Both you and Miguel had been trying for a while now to have a baby. Now that dream was finally going to be a reality. Unable to hide your glee, you hurried to Miguel's office to share the news with your loving husband.
With your rabbit speed, you made it in no time. Miguel was spooked as you entered in a hurry. His first thought thinking that your heat was acting up again.
"Nope~ Won't be having those for a while~" You chirped, nearly jumping in place.
Miguel held your waist as he gave you a curious look. His hands stroking your cheek before finally putting two and two together. The light in his eyes sparkled brightly as he lifted you in the air before giving you a deep kiss.
"I'm going to be a Father!"
"Hehe, and I'm going to be a Mom~" You squealed.
The two of you rejoiced and shared the news to close family and friends, well, Miguel's close family and friends.
As your pregnancy furthered, Miguel proved to be an even more loving husband and soon-to-be Father. He cared for your every whim, making sure you had everything you needed.
Miguel got you the best doctor since you were a hybrid, and even hired a trusted maid to help you when he wasn't there. Every craving you had, Miguel got for you. Every small complaint you muttered, Miguel fixed for you.
Everything to make you comfortable.
By the time you were in your third trimester, things got a little difficult for you. You felt like crying every second of the day because you wanted to go somewhere or eat something, but you physically could not do it.
The pregnancy had made you bedridden for rest. Miguel tried his best to comfort you and get you things to entertain you with, but it didn't help much. You wanted to move around and do things, not lay in bed.
All laying in bed was doing was making your mind wander. Like what would happen if your baby had ears and a tail like you? Would they be bullied by other kids? Should they just be home schooled, but then what about friends?
What if someone tried to kidnap your child? Just thinking about what you went through brought tears to your eyes. You didn't want your baby to go through what you did. You wanted them to have a better life, an easier one.
"Baby? Oh, baby, don't cry. What's wrong?" Miguel asked as he entered the room with some snacks.
"M-Miggy, what...what if our baby looks like me?"
"Like you?" Miguel stroked your cheek, knowing where this was going, "Then they would be the most perfect child in the whole world. I would love nothing more than our child to have your genes."
"B-But...But what if-"
"(Y/n), nothing will happen to our baby, I promise. I will go to hell and back to protect both you and our child."
Sniffing towards his words, you started to feel better. Thanking Miguel, you happily took the snacks and enjoyed him company.
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When it was finally time for you to give birth, Miguel was starting to lose his cool. He wanted to make sure that everything was perfect for your procedure. Miguel wanted to make sure that the doctors were careful with your tail.
Holding your hand as you cried out in pain, Miguel gulped as you squeezed tightly. Your cries hurt. Miguel didn't want you to be in pain, but at the same time...you were giving birth to his baby.
"Just one more push!" The doctor said.
Miguel watched as the nurses struggled to hold you up slightly while you cried out. With one more push, you started to pant heavily as cries filled the room. The doctor finished his side and glanced towards the two of you,
"Congrats. It's a baby boy,"
"You did it, baby." Miguel kissed your head as you rested, "You did so good."
"I....I want to see...our baby," You whispered.
Miguel nodded as the doctor came over, handing the child to you. You laughed, finally holding the child that you carried for nine months. They were still whimpering before nuzzling into your embrace.
Tears rolled down your cheeks as you looked towards Miguel, giving him a kiss.
"He looks like you," You said with a laugh. Miguel stroked your head,
"Look, he has your eyes." He whispered.
You just smiled towards Miguel. The doctor took your baby to clean up while you rested. Finally. You and Miguel finally had a baby.
"What will you two name him?" One of the nurses asked. Miguel stroked your head as you started to fall asleep,
"Gabriel."
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After three years, both you and Miguel had another child. Miguel teasingly told you that Gabriel needed a sibling. You agreed of course, and to your surprise, the second child came out more like you.
It was worrisome, but Miguel reassured you that everything was going to be fine. Not only did your daughter have both you and him to watcher over her, but also a big brother.
"Awe, I wan bers li mama," Gabriel babbled, pointing towards his sister's ears.
"You have momma's speed and agility. You are perfect just the way you are," Miguel chuckled, picking up his son, "You're going to have to protect your sister because of her ears and tail, okay?"
"Kay,"
"Hehe, Miggy, he's too young." You giggled. Miguel scoffed as he wrapped his arm around you,
"Do you think the next one will have a tail and no ears or visa versa?" Miguel said with a chuckle.
You felt your face burn up, trying to hide your smile.
"Ask me again during my heat."
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Hope you enjoyed~~
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yuri-is-online · 16 hours
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Jade falling in love for the first time and being an absolute loser simp about it.
Yuu lives in his head and fantasies rent free; he can't get enough of them. He wrote about them in his diary (one with a lock on it because floyd likes to snoop). He needs them so bad. It's like that one meme where the girl is like "I need him in a way that's concerning to feminism". He's so desperate someone help him.
Bro has innocent little fantasies of them together, like Yuu waking up beside him and peppering his face in sweet little kisses while he tries to hold them closer and convince them to stay in bed for 5 more minutes (it never really does just end up being 5 minutes though), and then his thoughts just take a sharp turn and what was a sweet little daydream has turned into thoughts of him softly and sleepily fucking Yuu into his mattress. He didn't get to go back to sleep but he's not complaining about it if this is the cost he's paying. The world us cold and hard but you're soft and warm and if fantasies are the closest he's getting to that peace then so be it
He is one jealous eel (he is in deep denial about this but us slowly starting to realize just how far deep into this he us and he really doesn't want to acknowledge that), and he get the most jealous over the most innocent shit too. One day he sees Yuu and Epel talking in a language he doesn't recognize and he's like ???, and it turns out it's their native language but it doesn't exist here so he can't learn it dammit. He sees them struggling to do something and look around the library for help, skipping right over him and asking Ace ir Deuce for help. They've even picked Leona for help before him! Seriously he is RIGHT HERE! what can any of them do for Yuu that he can't?!
Jade has to be careful with his merform around them. Partially because everytime Yuu walks into the room his body suddenly decides to cosplay a laser rave, but also because he's been overthinking shit recently. Yuu is a human, painfully so. They're expecting a human courtship and a human marriage and a human family and a human life and. He can't give that to them. Not unless he stays on land forever, which he might be able to do, but realistically he wouldn't want to. So that leaves Yuu coming to the coral sea where it's cold and dark and he just can't see Yuu doing something like that (he's wrong you've wanted to be a mermaid ever since your cousin made you watch H2O when you were like 7), so now he just trys to be as human as possible around you so he doesn't scare you off.
Also there's the fact that every time spring transitions into summer and he's stuck in his merfirm for the next week and a half and now you really can't see him like this because if he sees you then you're going to be dragged into the water so fast with an 12 foot long eel wrapped around you while he desperately tries to stop himself from being too desperate and start rutting against you and- Oh great seven he's so sorry-
Oh, you like that? Your bringing his face to your neck and fuck you smell so nice and he's biting down and tearing your clothes apart with his claws before he knows what's going on and your legs are wrapping around his tail and-
... Grotto. Where's the grotto he had picked out? He was just in it where is it?
Jade asks you for art supplies in one of his birthday lines so he can draw while he hikes. His "diary" is something Floyd took an interest in once upon a time until he saw it full of mushrooms, rocks, and mountains. Jade still puts a lock on it because he finds it funny looking, but there's more than just mushrooms in there now. Need he's not merely in love he's in need of you and it's affecting his ability to function.
If he wakes up alone in his dreams he will find you in the kitchen, trying to hurry up and make your tea so you can so you can surprise him for once. It never works as he's able to trap you against the counter and breathe down your neck, winding himself around you as you laugh the pure music that he thinks your laugh would sound like as he presses into you so you can feel how much he wanted to to be next to you this morning. How troublesome that he had to go find you and draw out his suffering, not to fret. He loves you so, there's no reason to worry that he won't be gentle with how he lowers you down onto the counter, he'll still prepare you softly but he won't be slow in how he takes you-
He's slow to return to wakefulness, he doesn't mind the cold because it makes him feel at home but he does not like being alone. Loving you is a lot like losing you because he becomes so aware of how he is alone. Jade sees himself as a good person to ask for help, he does not think he is wrong in his benevolence but perhaps that's exactly the problem. Perhaps you know what trifling thing he is working towards obtaining and find him unworthy, Epel can speak to you in ways he can't (to ask you to teach him your speech is an option of course but he knows it's too intimate a thing to ask of you now), those fools found you first and treasured you when he made the awful, idiotic mistake of thinking you boring so of course you would see him in the same way. Of course you would feel safer asking things of Leona, he's the one who saved you while Jade was helping Azul drown you and it's not like he did much to make you see him when you stumbled into the Lounge running away from Jamil. You asked Leona for help, you came to them by accident, and Floyd was the one who got to carry you. Something he definitely didn't make fun of him of him for being jealous about. "Ya got to wake your mate up and see what they looked like sleepin' wasn't that nice?" Oh how he hard he wanted to punch his brother for that. So he did. It made him feel much better.
It takes time but he manages to weave his way into your orbit. He gets to see more of you, and he feels conflicted. The octotrio has gotten to see a lot of humanity, and they feel like they have enough of a grasp on them to conduct their business. That's something that certainly contributed to his thinking of you as boring of course but well. The more he sees of you now the more he realizes how little he really knows about humanity and the surface, he might not see the appeal of the surface world but he sees the appeal of you. Still he knows he wouldn't be happy if he stayed on it forever, how could he possibly ask the same of you? There's barely any sunlight under the water and humans need that to survive... he's done his research on corners of the internet he would have just laughed at before he fell for you and he knows what they say. That humans and merfolk only seldom stay together in the way that he wants, that they find his sort of merfolk to be terrifying. It can't help that he was your enemy at first can it...
I sort of like the idea that Yuu's interest in the less than human looking boys would be considered weird. The concept of a monsterfucker isn't foreign exactly but a monster-marry-and-raise-a-family-er is. There is a difference between a relationship and a sexual fantasy and Yuu sees no reason they can't have both, to the chagrin of damn near everyone around them. So it makes you sad to see him hide himself away from you and wonder why he hates his own beauty so much. He keeps his teeth from you, tries to hide his merform too and you just don't understand why. His bioluminescence takes your breath away and fills you with such soft stirrings of attraction you cry into your pillows and write 10 more pages about how desperately you want to drown yourself for just one chance with him! But he's running away from you and now Azul tells you he's going to be out of commission for a solid week with a sigh that you know is theatrical but still worries you. So you confront Jade about it and he seems almost sick, unable to control his transformation as he displays for you winding around the bubble that keeps you breathing outside of Octavinelle's dorm. The lights take your breath away long before he breeches the bubble to press up against you and moans somewhere deep into his throat letting his instincts guide him for just a few blissful seconds before he flops back with a stammer because oh no, not like this never like this please forgive him and run back to-
He's not expecting to be pulled back, you look as hungry as he feels as you guide him to your neck and whine something about how you need him when he's the one supposed to be saying that and scream in radiant joy when he bites. You are trying to wrap around him, to grind into him, babbling in frustration trying to scratch at his shoulders for a grip so you can wind your legs tighter around him-
He pushes the bubble away from the entrance and steers it haphazardly back, there's a place for this. Safe, secluded, and warm he made sure to pick one where a bit of sunlight could still reach the sandy floors and fuel you as he finally takes what you were always willing to give. Slowly and softly until he has you relaxed into his trap and then oh so gently for all the time after.
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pickingupmymercedes · 12 hours
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I'd like to believe - Lewis Hamilton
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Alternative sequel to Maybe in another life / When I get to meet you
pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader!
warnings: mentions of mourning, angst, will make you emotional
wordcount: +1K
a/n: Alternative-ish ending (this was actually my first draft to continue their story, so the happy-ish one is the alternative, sort of).
As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!
MILD TRIGGERING CONTENT UNDER, PROCEED WITH CAUTION.
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My dearest little one,
Today marks ten years since you should have been here, celebrating another year of life. Ten times the snow has fallen, making everything quiet outside.
They say time heals all cuts, but some cuts go real deep, leaving scars that never quite go away. And I still find it hard to believe that a whole decade has passed.
You'd be so grown now, so full of life and curiosity, brimming with questions and dreams. I often wonder what you'd be like – would you have my stubbornness and determination, or your mother's grace and patience?
Maybe a beautiful blend of both, creating someone truly unique.
I’m going to visit your stone again later today. Leave this letter like every year. I suspect there’ll be fresh flowers, as always, probably from your mother.
She never forgets.
We never reconnected, not like I'd hoped for. But I think about her often.
I searched everywhere for her. I just really needed someone to share the pain with, someone to hold onto while everything fell apart. We tried talking, spilling out all our feelings, but the words wouldn't come out right. Maybe we were afraid of saying the wrong thing or making things worse.
Maybe we were both thinking the same thing – maybe if we'd done things differently, maybe you'd still be here.
After a while, the space between us just kept getting bigger, too big to cross. You see, your mom, she found a way to move on. She built a life for herself, a life where the pain was still there, but it didn't control her anymore.
I hope she's found peace and happiness, something she deserved more than anyone. She was an incredible woman, and I wish I had been the man she needed me to be.
I hope she reads these letters someday, that she understands how much I loved you both, how much I regret not being there when you needed me most.
Maybe one day, when the weight of these years starts to feel a little lighter, I can finally forgive myself.
Maybe then, I can find the strength to reach out to her, not to get back together, but to find some peace, a simple way to say thank you for the love we shared and sorry for the loss that tore us apart.
You know, life has changed quite a bit since I last wrote to you.
I'm with someone, have been for the past four years. She's patient, kind and knows about you. I don't think we'll ever have children though. She's got her own ghosts.
I retired from racing. Shortly after I won my eighth championship with Ferrari. It was a dream come true, but also bittersweet because I couldn't share it with you. I work as a consultant for the team now, just like Niki was for me at Mercedes. You’d have loved him.
It's a different kind of thrill, guiding the next generation of racers, helping them navigate the same challenges I once faced, but it drives me forward.
I’d like to believe you’d be proud of your old man for that.
I sometime wonder if you would have been drawn to racing too, or maybe you'd have found your passion in something entirely different. Whatever it might have been, I would have supported you every step of the way and with all my heart.
I think about the things you'd enjoy often; you know?! The hobbies and interests you'd develop.
Maybe you'd love music, like your mother. She had an incredible ear for it, always humming a tune or singing softly to herself. It’s what got us close in the first place so many years ago.
Perhaps you'd have a knack for building things, creating something out of nothing with your hands and imagination.
Either way, I hope you'd have found joy in the simple things, just like I try and do now.
There's so much I wish I could’ve shared with you. So many lessons I've learned the hard way and would to show you. Life isn't always easy, my little one. It's filled with ups and downs, triumphs and failures.
One of the most important things I wish I could’ve taught you is the value of love. Real love, the kind that fills your heart and soul, and is worth every bit of pain and sacrifice.
I had that with your mother, even if I didn't realize it at the time. She saw right through me, saw the man behind the driver, and loved me for who I was. I'd hope you'd find someone like that, someone who understands and loves you unconditionally.
It might hurt sometimes, but that's how you know it's real. Love isn't always easy, but it's the most beautiful thing.
I would want you to know that it's okay to make mistakes though. I made plenty, and each one taught me something valuable. The key is to learn from them, to grow and become a better person. But each moment, whether good or bad, shapes who you are.
I wish I could have been there to guide you through it all, to help you navigate the challenges and celebrate the victories. My motto has been “Still I Rise” for the longest time and if you wanted it could’ve been yours as well.
Life isn't about being perfect; it's about being true to yourself and striving to be the best version of you.
In the quieter moments I still dream about you, you know. In my dreams, you're a whirlwind of energy, your laughter filling the air. We go on adventures, explore the world together. I teach you what I know, and you teach me about everything else.
Those dreams are my sanctuary, a place where we can be together, even if just for a moment.
Sometimes, I catch myself talking to you out loud, as if you were right beside me. I tell you about my day, about the races, about the world. It might sound silly, but it brings me comfort. It's my way of keeping you close, of making sure you're never forgotten.
Even though we never got to meet, you are a part of me, and I carry you in my heart every day.
You are my greatest loss, but also my greatest gift. You've taught me more about love than anything else in this world.
Sometimes, under a sky full of stars, I imagine you up there with the constellations, looking down at me with curious eyes. And I need you to know that we love you still, deeply and unconditionally.
Ten years old. A whole person with your own personality, dreams, and wishes.
The world missed out on knowing you, and so did I.
But your memory, my precious child, it lives on. It lives on in the way I cherish every moment, every sunrise, every laugh shared with a friend. It lives on in the way I try to be a better person, kinder, someone who would have been a good dad to you.
This letter is my vow written down. A promise that even though you're not here, you'll never be forgotten.
Happy birthday, my sweet child. I hope, wherever you are, you're smiling, knowing that you are loved and cherished.
You are my light, my angel and a part of me. And though the path I walk may be lonely sometimes, I carry you and your mom with me in my heart, always.
With all the love that would have filled a lifetime.
Dad.
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TAGLIST - @saturnssunflower @xoscar03 @chocolatediplomatdreamerzonk @happy-golden-hour @vicurious28
@0710khj @thecubanator2 @neilakk @bigratbitchsworld @adriswrld
@fearfam69691 @cmleitora @goldenroutledge
If you’d like to be added to my taglist you can leave a comment or send me a dm/ask.
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writing-for-life · 2 days
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Ok, I’m not going to get involved in a certain thread because I don’t want any drama and the line of argumentation leans too much to one side already (the views of the vocal majority in this fandom) for it to make much sense to contribute, but I had a few thoughts today:
In a fandom where people write AUs full of cows and merpeople and other shenanigans that have nothing to do with canon (or the actual characters, to be frank), they can’t do that for Calliope (or any other female character, for that matter)?
She doesn’t get to play in the sandbox?
We don’t have the imagination to turn her into one of the two dolls that kiss?
We have to keep her in character while everyone else can be turned into… whatever person (certainly neither the one of the comics nor the show)?
We constantly have to remember her strife and trauma and can’t invent (!, that’s what writing is about!) a different or new side to her? Or a better future? One in which she gets to be happy?
Or we can’t turn her into someone she canonically isn’t?
While all of this always, always works for Dream? Or the hairy guy?
And speaking of said guy: Do we have any reason to think Dream would treat him better than Nada? We’re automatically assuming he’d do the same thing to Calliope, but not to him? Or: Why do we assume he would do what he did to Nada to any other love interest, because canonically, there’s no evidence for that (we wrote about this on here before)? So no, that line of argument just doesn’t fly in my view.
If Calliope and Dream have chemistry and people are able to acknowledge it (which most do), that on its own is enough to ship them. The chemistry argument works with every M/M ship. Why doesn’t it work with her?
Oh, she is allowed in gen fics (and I am a fan of those btw, but that’s past the point), or as a character with very little agency, or any personal or sexual desires. Even better if she serves the ship. That’s okay of course, I forgot. Reminds me of most of the women of the Sandman—I wonder why.
I just wish people would give the honest reason without going through all the mental gymnastics of why Dreamuse is not an interesting (or even bad or problematic) ship, and the other one is the best invention since sliced bread:
They want to see/imagine two guys together.
There, I said it, it wasn’t hard. It’s really as simple as that in fandom, it’s a predictable fantasy, and it’s the same in every fandom. The Sandman isn’t any different.
M/F ships are frowned upon because they’re “heteronormative”, and yet, (mostly) women proceed to project (mostly) heteronormative relationship dynamics on two guys of which they fancy at least one and use the other to project themselves on. Sometimes, they fancy both of them and get more of what they have the hots for. Good for them, there’s nothing wrong with it. We have oodles of research by now why some women prefer M/M porn; it’s not earth-shattering, groundbreaking or “queer-positive” (it sometimes fetishises homosexuality though, but that’s a different topic). It’s been like that since at least the times of Spirk, and probably longer. It’s actually a fairly (dare I utter the word on here?) straight female sexual fantasy. The queer-positivity everyone is so enamoured with is more than, and not singularly limited to, shipping M/M—as a bisexual woman, I personally can’t identify with that line of thinking at all, but other people’s mileage might vary…
If people are into smutty/explicit fanfic , that’s just how it works: Some women project on a female body while imagining to get railed by a guy, others prefer to imagine two guys because they fancy men. Again: Nothing wrong with it, but it’s also not as deep as people often pretend it is.
Yes, I wrote about that one before as well. That’s why I can do it again—“once your reputation is ruined” and all that 🤣
It’s ok to be horny for two guys without turning it into a brain-contorting statement every time.
It’s also okay to reflect on the wider implications of completely erasing women from EVERY fandom, especially if you identify as one.
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inuhalfdemon · 21 hours
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No One Can Know... (17/?)
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Word Count = 4,481 Words
Rating = Explicit (SMUT + Violence)
Chapter 17
"No one else could make you feel like I do, I do, I do.
No one ever gets as deep inside you as I do, baby..."
- Alice Cooper
It was early morning when Lucifer materialized himself into Alastor’s hotel suite. It had been days since Al’s….episode…and Alastor had – predictably – been especially touch-averse and distant following the event. Alastor had still made it a point of making sure Lucifer was welcome to stay with him at the hotel but Lucifer felt it better to give the guy some space, let him process through his aftermath in his own way.
“Breakfast is finished and ready downstairs if you’d care for any.” Alastor told him, he was leaning against his writing desk that set against the wall – holding a cup of coffee. His smile looked strained. He had his jacket off; his shirt sleeves rolled to the elbows.
“You got that all done rather quickly.” Lucifer noted. “Were you up earlier than usual?”
“Yes.” Alastor brought the mug up to his face, taking a swallow, his ears twitching sharply. “I was…Woke up, then couldn’t go back to sleep.”    
“You seem agitated this morning, is something wrong?”
“Everybody is pissing me off this morning.” Alastor told him, as if that explained everything.
Is anyone else even up yet? Lucifer wondered.
“Would you prefer it if I left you alone for a while?” Lucifer asked him.
“No.” Alastor told him, honestly. “Just don’t be irritating.” He pushed off from the desk, turning to absently scan the newspaper he had there.
Lucifer snorted and Alastor gave him a sharp look.
 “Damn, you are in a bad mood this morning.” Lucifer smirked with a coy look in his eye, strolling over to Alastor now. “There are ways to deal with some of that growing tension, if you catch my drift.”
Alastor cocked an ear at that; turning his head – about to say something - when he caught the expression on Lucifer’s face, eyes wide and staring at Alastor’s crotch.
Alastor moved his mug; glancing down.
“FUCK!” He spat; slamming the mug down onto the desk and splashing coffee.
 “What’s…what’s happening?” Lucifer was stunned…clearly seeing the growing bulge behind the seam in Alastor’s pants.
Alastor leaned against the desk, head in his hand – clearly mortified.
“I’m having…a breakthrough rut.”
“A what, what?” Lucifer asked him, still staring – processing.
“A rut between ruts – if you will.” Alastor groaned. “Not a full one…typically much shorter, less intense. They sneak up on me sometimes.”
“Oh.” Lucifer said.
Then, “Oh…” He looked at Alastor, smile widening across his face.
“You fucking wipe that smile off your face.” Alastor angrily hissed at him. “There’s only three days until the extermination and Adam targets this hotel. We don’t have time for this! We still have a load of shit to do to get things ready and Charlie has another godforsaken bonding activity she wants us to participate in today before we start!”
Lucifer’s grin curved more. “We might just have more time than you think…”
“Pray tell,” Alastor glared at him. “What gives you that idea.” 
“Charlie told me yesterday what the activity she had planned for us was…I took initiative and told her that: you and I have very important strategies to discuss in your handling Adam for the first part of the assault and that we…sadly…would likely be otherwise engaged all day.” Lucifer tilted his head, flashing Alastor a very wide and very toothy grin.
“I might rather the activity Charlie has planned…” Alastor told him, unenthusiastically.
“You’d rather sit in a circle, holding hands, singing ‘kum-ba-yah’ with everyone this morning?” Lucifer asked him, dryly. 
“She wouldn’t-“ Alastor saw the stark deadpanned looked on Lucifer’s face. “Never mind…I take that back. I’m liking the idea of your plan much better now.”
“Hmm, yes.” Lucifer slyly grinned. “I’d much prefer singing ‘Cum-ba-“
“Stop!” Alastor quickly interjected and Lucifer snickered.
Alastor heavily sighed in his frustration, ears leaning back. “This is ridiculous. You and I need to be utilizing our time productively…actually discussing Adam and making our final preparations for the hotel.”
“What we need, Al, is for you to be focused.” Lucifer told him; coming closer and reaching a hand to press his palm to Alastor’s face. “We’ve still got time to tie the loose ends up but you’ve got to make yourself a priority in all of this too. Everything we’ve planned and prepared for won’t work if you leave yourself open to distractions or mistakes.” Alastor leant himself into Lucifer’s hand at that.
“I made a deal with you - promised you - that I would be here to meet your needs so that we might see this thing through.” Lucifer continued and Alastor softened further, tilting his head; Lucifer pressed his forehead to his. “Let me keep that promise and tell me…what do you need?”   
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After engulfing them both in his shadows; Alastor moved them both into his bed. Still dressed; they roughly – passionately – kissed as they quickly both began working each other out of their clothes: Alastor deftly hooking the underside of Lucifer’s hat with a claw and tossing it so that it spun and landed atop the beam of a bedpost; Lucifer slipping off Alastor’s bowtie and quickly unclasping each button to his shirt so that he might reach beyond the fabric; greedily touching heated bare-chested skin with clawed hands.
Alastor wasted no time getting Lucifer out from his suit jacket and shirt, sliding the garments off the angel and pushing them from off the bed. Lucifer’s claws dug red trails into his ribs and back, sliding underneath his fully open dress shirt and dragging pleasurably all along his skin. Growling appreciatively, Alastor pressed Lucifer into the bed – crawling over him and laying himself across the angel. He held Lucifer’s face firmly by one hand – his other hand dragging claws through platinum locks; lips pressed tight and warm against his.
Lucifer felt Alastor’s tight bulge pressing firmly against him through the clothing and he slid his hands down to begin loosening the clasps to Alastor’s dress pants. Alastor groaned against him and he lifted himself up; moving to kick off his shoes and socks. Lucifer quickly moved to do the same; seeing Alastor was deeply flushed with his arousal now; his antlers lengthening.
“Do we need to go somewhere else?” Lucifer asked him; wondering if Al would need to shift form at some point.
“No…” Alastor told him in a low voice, gripping him by the hips and dragging him to and against him. “I have you right where I want you.” He told him darkly.
Lucifer shivered pleasurably – excitably - in anticipation. He’s so different when he’s ruttish. I like it.
They both were still wearing their dress pants, Alastor’s clasps completely undone. Alastor leant down – crushing his mouth back to Lucifer’s, bending one knee so that he was pressed into Lucifer’s crotch and grinding himself heavily against one leg. Lucifer gasped at the tightening tension between both legs; feeling and hearing Alastor grunting above him. Lucifer moved to slide his hand down - seeking relief. Alastor snarled at the movement; grabbing and gripping the hand tightly in his own and pulling it away – pinning it to the bed as he ground himself even harder into Lucifer.
Ah, fuck… The tension between his legs was building and tortuously sweet; he felt the heat of his own flush creeping from his chest up into his neck and spreading across his face.
Seeing this; Alastor shifted enough so that he could grip Lucifer’s other hand – pinning it down tightly just the same as he continued mercilessly rutting himself into Lucifer’s leg – pressing his knee deeper into Lucifer’s tightening crotch.  
Lucifer was throbbing and his hips jerked; desperate to find any form of relief. Lucifer squirmed, searching for even the smallest amount of friction.
Alastor’s grip on him tightened and he lifted his head. “Keep still, your majesty.” He growled, ears pinned and eyes glowing red. “I’m not nearly done with you yet…”
Oh, fuck, fuck…he’s not messing around.
Alastor’s eyes narrowed; his grinding slowing and turning into long dragging strokes all along his leg.
Jesus. If I’m this hard then he’s a fucking masochist…
With a low groan, Alastor’s head tilted back and he bit his lip – blood seeping from the cut.
Lucifer huffed out his frustration – his erection was painfully tight in his pants at this point.
And, Alastor was fucking smirking at him.
The absolute cunt.
Suddenly, Lucifer had a thought and he couldn’t help the smile that touched his face.
Would be a first for us…can’t say I’ve never been a little bit curious…wonder what the smug motherfucker would make of it then.
Something very clearly shifted and Lucifer waited for Alastor’s reaction to it, but the rutting demon was too otherwise occupied to notice it right away.
Lucifer felt a surprising lack of relief at the change. He was no longer crammed tightly and painfully into the seam of his pants-  but if anything – his throbbing and aching need for Alastor’s administrations was more now.
That…may have backfired. He thought briefly as a pitiful, needy sound escaped from between his lips.
Alastor’s ears stiffened at the sound and his eyes deeply dilated. He huffed; smelling a scent he hadn’t previously noted and his head sharply jerked – looking at Lucifer with not just a hungry expression – but with one that was starving.
Alastor’s smile stretched, tightening sharply at the corners and Lucifer was nearly slapped by the pungent smell of Alastor’s musk.
Oh…crap.
 Alastor immediately released him; letting Lucifer’s hands go and lifting himself from Lucifer’s legs.
Alastor’s musk pervaded Lucifer’s senses; his eyes dilated into dark discs, his blood ran hot and his body cried out for the claiming it craved.
Desperate, Lucifer’s hand quickly went to the clasps of his pants – jerking them open and shoving the waistband sharply down. Alastor moved, grasping the fabric further down on Lucifer’s legs and pulled him freely out.
Alastor hummed with pleasure; seeing the new wet, seeping and fleshy cunt, nestled there between Lucifer’s spread and open legs. 
Slowly, Alastor crawled to him – his humming building into a deep, low and purring growl as he descended on Lucifer with watering mouth. Lucifer’s system was flooded with pheromones – his body electric and singing – as he lifted his hips; sighing when Alastor’s teeth and tongue touched against his novel and needing sex.
 Alastor was made dizzy at the scent and he grunted sharply – appreciatively - at the taste; his face burying deep into the sopping folds and finding the delicate entrance.
“Al…” Lucifer’s hips tilted; and he felt Alastor’s tongue enter him – sliding and twisting inward – lapping and brushing against clenching and pulsating walls. “Ah, fuck…Al.” Lucifer moaned.
Alastor’s ears straightened sharply upward; quivering at the needy tones. 
Huffing again, Alastor pulled back his tongue and retreated himself from Lucifer’s fluttering and heated hole.
Alastor shifted himself between Lucifer’s legs; reaching inside his waistband and pulling himself out. His erection was remarkable; tightly curved, fully formed and more than ready for the task at hand.
Alastor shifted still closer; holding his length with one hand and stroking it teasingly against Lucifer’s slit; pressing the tip of it briefly to the swollen clit and sliding back down.
“Are you ready to become a proper doe, darling?” Alastor asked him, softly.
Finding himself too overwhelmed to answer him verbally; Lucifer nodded, biting his lip and lifting his pelvis.
Sliding himself in; Alastor slowly pushed his length fully into Lucifer; burying himself completely up to the root. Lucifer’s walls clenched around him.
“Ah….shit.” Alastor groaned. “Ah, that’s tight.”
Gasping together; they both paused – waiting for their bodies to adjust to this new and incredible feeling. Alastor stretched himself over Lucifer; finding both his hands again – he intertwined his fingers with his – holding him tightly. He leant down; foreheads touching as Alastor began to move – taking slow and long strokes – in and out.
Lucifer rotated his hips and he relished every pleasurable sensation he found in each tilt he made. His body bowed beneath Alastor; lost in their movement, lost in their scent and lost in their sounds.
“Oh, Luci…” Alastor pulled his head away; groaning with immense pleasure. “How sweet you feel…” And, he bent his face to him – kissing him warmly.
Lucifer lifted his face, pressing himself into the kiss as he felt Alastor’s thrusts speed up. Sweating and panting; they moved with and against each other – their tension rising and tightening together. Lucifer’s threshold met its end first; he broke from his kiss with Alastor; obscenely needy and wanting sounds escaping him with each drive Alastor made into him. He bent himself further backward and when Alastor’s hips thrust forward; he saw stars.
Yes….yes….YES. He thought, heart hammering in his chest at each phenomenal stroke that brought him closer to a fantastic climax.
Alastor bent to him; his thrusting becoming more desperate as his own end swiftly followed. Alastor thrust himself sharply – deeply – into Lucifer; the angel cried out and broke beneath him. Growling; Alastor thrust himself sharper and harder – a rush of wetness between them and Lucifer’s spasming walls sent him careening over the edge. With one final growling grunt; Alastor jerked his hips heavily forward – holding himself there as he emptied himself into Lucifer – feeling a deep and carnal satisfaction at the sensation of his cum spilling out of Lucifer’s wet pussy when he finally pulled himself out.
Lucifer was still laying there, processing his vaginal orgasm when Alastor leaned back, gripped him by the waist and flipped him over. Alastor’s hands slid underneath him; coaxing him up and onto his knees. Lucifer was lost to a pleasant haze; Alastor’s musk telling Lucifer’s mind and body that this was something he also wanted; and when Alastor slid himself in again…there was no question.
Pressing himself back: Lucifer widened his hips, feeling Alastor’s thrusts reaching into him in an even deeper way. Alastor’s claws were dug tightly into his waist; holding and pulling him back so that every drive into him was pleasure spiked with pain but the combination of the two only served to heighten his arousal. Alastor’s erection quickly recovered and soon he was pounding into Lucifer’s newly developed cervix in just the perfect way. Heat rushed into Lucifer’s face and he felt a familiar burning coil tightening deep within his belly. Gasping; he buried his face into the bed; his hands forming fists into the covers and the change in angle only served to bring him more pleasure. 
Moaning and feeling like a bitch in heat; Lucifer limply rocked back and forth. Alastor leant with his long body over him – sliding himself in even deeper and thrusting harder. Alastor’s penis curved into him, pressing and sliding against the sweetest of spots. When Lucifer came again; he was yelling into the covers:
“Ffffffffuck!!! Yes….”
Alastor’s claws dug deeper; keeping him in place while he continued to chase his own climax. Lucifer panted; feeling incredibly overstimulated and sore. His body shaking, he groaned beneath Alastor.
Feeling and hearing the change in him; Alastor slowed his movements. Releasing Lucifer’s hips; he leaned forward onto one hand; pressing his chest to Lucifer’s back – gliding his other hand across Lucifer’s belly and sliding claws into wet folds.
Slowly…wonderfully…Alastor dragged and pushed his length through Lucifer as his fingers circled his sensitive nub. The additional stimulation did something unexpected for Lucifer; quickly changing his overstimulation into another mounting climax that he wasn’t sure he was ready to take.
“Al!” He lifted himself. “Oh, fuck…Al…wait. I can’t…I’m…Fuck I’m-!”
Alastor chuckled darkly against him; his fingers pressing harder into the swelling nub; his thrusts speeding back up again.
The wave of Lucifer’s third orgasm came crashing into him; and Lucifer stiffened and bent beneath Alastor. Feeling his angel break apart beneath him again; Alastor thrust himself sharp and deep into Lucifer; unloading into him again and slowly pumping himself out.
Alastor pulled himself away and seeing Lucifer shaking and wobbling on his knees; he pulled him down with him and they collapsed together on the bed – both soaked in sweat and panting heavily.
“Maybe warn a guy…” Lucifer huffed, still panting. “Before you wreck his pussy like that! Jesus...fuck, Al…” 
“Maybe warn a guy…” Alastor huffed with him. “Before springing said pussy out to get wreck.”
Lucifer snorted and they both choked out exhausted laughter.
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Still shaking with mirth, Alastor pulled Lucifer closer to him – both laying on their backs as they drifted off together in post-coital rest.
“I thought you said these in-between things for you were less intense!” Lucifer panted.
“Hm…yes.” Alastor sighed. “I did say that…”
“This is the fourth round, Al! Fuck!” Lucifer bent back; overstimulated and incredibly sore.
It was getting on to be well into the afternoon now and Alastor and Lucifer had remained in Alastor’s room; never leaving the bed. 
Alastor chuckled; adjusting the movement of his hips.
“Your fault for being so goddamn irresistible, your majesty.” Alastor purred back at him. “I can’t seem to get enough of you today.”
Alastor laid leant back – half-sitting - against the headboard of the bed. He was fully naked now – having lost his shirt and pants at some point during their second round – and he leaned back comfortably on the stack of pillows, jutting his hips in a steady but easy pace as Lucifer rode him.
Lucifer leaned forward now; adjusting the angle as the overstimulation lessened but remained for him just the same. He had shifted his genitals back to his preferred male ones. Alastor’s dick was hard and curved inside him, Lucifer’s own cock erect and oozing drops of pre-cum at the slit. Lucifer lashed his long devil’s tail in frustration; feeling incredibly aroused but finding no relief for the feeling at present.
Alastor smirked at him; also feeling overstimulated and frustrated but feeling satisfied to see it reflect back at him in such a visually pleasing way. He slowed the rotation of his hips; his juts into Lucifer turning into quick but short jabs.
“Maybe if you weren’t such a fucking tease...” Lucifer stretched himself out; claws digging and dragging across Alastor’s chest and drawing blood.
Alastor leant back; hissing in pleasure at the sharply biting pain. His jabbing juts stuttered; and he thrusted himself – hard and deep – into Lucifer once, then twice.
“Ah, fuck yes!” Lucifer nearly curled himself in half – claws dragging deeper.
Alastor’s musk had abated but Lucifer still felt the effects of the aphrodisiac in his system. Blood seeped from the freshly made cuts across Alastor’s chest, sliding down his ribs and across his abdomen in small winding trails. Alastor drove into him again and Lucifer shuddered with immense pleasure. Leaning himself down – he moaned obscenely, lapping at the blood across Alastor’s belly with forked tongue; dilated pupils locked and staring at Alastor’s deeply reddened face.
Mounting pleasure overtook all of Alastor’s senses and he clenched his teeth; driving himself deeply into Lucifer again and again. Bending backward at the assault; Lucifer lifted himself, clawed hand pressing into the smear of blood across Alastor’s stomach as he felt an incredible tension building. His devil’s tail whipped around them in frantic excitation. They came together – it wasn’t the first climax they found mutually for themselves that day but truthfully…Lucifer had gave up with keeping their total tally.
Lucifer shakily lifted himself off of Alastor, the sinner’s limp dick sliding from him and falling to the side.
Breathing heavily, he crawled up Alastor; sitting himself comfortably straddled on Alastor’s belly now.
“As fun as this has been…” He huffed, breathing heavily, “And as much as I’d like to continue doing this all week with you…” Alastor snorted at that. “Maybe we should work on winding you down now. We do have to actually do things tomorrow.”
Alastor made to make some smart-ass remark when Lucifer shifted form – all six wings unfurling from the angel’s back and stretching themselves widely before settling back, folded and relaxed beside them. Alastor’s eyes widened; unable to help himself from finding those wings utterly and entirely breathtaking.
“I sliced you up pretty good…” Lucifer noted softly, clawed finger trailing across one of the deeps cuts he had made to Alastor’s upper chest. “I welcome you to return the favor.” He murmured, lifting Alastor’s clawed hand and pressing the palm of it to his own chest.
Seemingly unable to help himself; Alastor extended his claws – their tips piercing the skin. Lucifer shuddered; a pulsing pleasure overwhelming and softening the bite of it. Alastor’s hand flexed; claws digging deeper but still, he hesitated. Holding Alastor’s hand pressed to his chest; Lucifer added pressure – encouraging Alastor’s hand to slide down, cutting delicate bleeding-golden trails into his own skin.
Alastor swallowed; retracting his claws and quickly pulling his hand away. His ears were standing straight; quivering and twitching ever so slightly. He looked into Lucifer’s eyes; finding nothing but an open approval there – he leant in. Wrapping his arms around Lucifer and pulling him closer to him, he licked and sucked at the seeping cuts his claws had created against the soft and heated skin.
The ichor hit his tongue and he moaned at the incredible taste of it.
Lucifer’s blood entering his system immediately reduced the roiling of lust Alastor was feeling. It wasn’t a solution to Alastor’s problem, with the occurrence of his ruts, he still needed to satiate what his body craved during his mating cycles…but, the ichor did help.
Lucifer wrapped his arms around Alastor; pulling him close and holding him to him as Alastor indulged himself on the angel’s golden blood. Feeling tired and buzzed himself; Lucifer sighed with pleasure. Alastor’s hands were lifting behind his back; claws finding the limbs of his wings and tracing through the feathers – sharp talon tips gliding between shafts and dragging against the thin and delicate skin.
Shuddering at the contact; Lucifer bent his head and Alastor’s hold on him tightened – sharpened teeth scraping against the raw and bloodied edges on his chest – wet and pointed tongue greedily searching for each and every last golden drop it could find. Lucifer felt Alastor’s claws digging into his wings; threatening to split the skin.
“Ruin them…” He breathed and Alastor stiffened – suddenly stopping all that he was doing.
Lucifer waited; feeling Alastor’s face pull away from his chest now; feeling the demon’s hands clench against the thin limbs of his wings – claws tightening, tips pressing sharply into and against the membranes.     
Suddenly, Alastor’s hands released him – letting go of the limbs and sliding clawed fingers through the incredible softness that was Lucifer’s feathers.  
Alastor tilted his smiling face; pressing himself close to Lucifer, holding his head against his he softly sighed: “I never would.” 
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 Alastor walked into the main suite of his hotel room; straightening and adjusting his dress shirt.
He lifted his jacket, meaning to slip it on next and then he paused.
Done with their amorous antics for the day, he and Lucifer had agreed to proceed through their evening in a productive manner: they planned to fully dress themselves, sit down to a proper meal and really strategize out how they were going to approach handling Adam. Lucifer, himself, sat at the sofa – sipping a cup of tea, already looking over some of the best defensive points they had narrowed down for when Alastor met Adam’s approach at the roof of the hotel.   
Setting the jacket aside, Alastor went to the sofa. Lucifer’s gaze hovered on the roughly made blueprint he was focused on before looking up at and seeing Alastor.
Alastor’s ears were moving, tweaking sharply and he had a very agitated expression despite his smile facing.
“What are you all irritated at me for?” Lucifer set his tea and the documents aside. “After the day you’ve had…you should be praising me.” Lucifer smirked up at Alastor. “And, that’s the look I get!?” Lifting a hand to his chest in a dramatic fashion. “I was nothing but pleasurably accommodating to you today and I think that-“
“Oh, shut it.” Alastor hissed at him, crawling over the sofa and into Lucifer’s lap; his knees on one end and his head facing the other way.
“I didn’t know we were trying out a new position…” Lucifer’s face flushed. “I just got dressed!”   
Alastor shoved him with a growl; settling himself and promptly twitching his fluffy deer tail that stuck out from the hole in his dress pants.
Lucifer stared at the tail in front of him; watching it flick about – sharply reflecting Alastor’s feelings of agitation.
Alastor propped himself up onto one elbow; sighing. “Your….reward then.” He weakly gestured to his backside.
The fur of Alastor’s tail matched the red and black coloration of his hair and ears - with a delicate line of white emphasizing its shape - the strands of hair forming it were long and delicate; it looked especially soft.
“May I?” Lucifer asked him, lifting a hand.
“…yes.” Alastor answered, sounding even more annoyed. “Just-“ He bent his head to the side; hiding the flush of embarrassment that was touching his face. “It’s sensitive…” He mumbled.
Lucifer could imagine. He didn’t mind bringing his devil’s tail into the mix of things when he felt like getting a little bit frisky with someone. It could be immensely pleasurable for him to do so even, but… others always felt the need to yank or twist on it which was incredibly painful or they would play with thing; stroke it or slide it through their fingers; get him all wound and worked up without realizing how it ever might have happened.   
Lucifer looked at the fluffed up little deer tail; watching it wave and twitch in front of him and he imagined that Alastor’s little appendage was incredibly sensitive; put that with the open and involuntary movements it made; and it really was no wonder why the guy chose to keep it hidden.
Lucifer reached out with clawed fingers; gently caressing the long, soft wisps of fur that ran along the back. Alastor stiffened for a moment at the contact; the tail straightening; standing straight up.
Yep…that’s sensitive. Lucifer thought, trying not to chuckle and embarrass Alastor any further.
Gently; he pressed long strands of the fur between his fingers; rubbing them together and feeling the softness without stimulating anymore of the nerve endings that ran beneath; base to tip. Alastor relaxed; his body melting into Lucifer’s lap and his tail swaying languidly now.
Knowing Alastor really wasn’t comfortable with him exploring his tail – and knowing that he really only offered it now as a kind of reciprocation to Lucifer’s wings…he released it; letting the incredibly soft strands of fur slide freely away and from his fingers. As a response; Alastor’s tail sharply wagged : overtly signaling Alastor’s appreciation.          
Lucifer smiled.
Then: “Alright, get off!” He roughly shoved Alastor from off of his lap. Alastor toppled completely off from the couch, yelping out in surprise as he hit the floor.  “Finish getting dressed, already! We’ve got shit to do!”
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Taglist: @nyx91
Next Update: 6/1/24
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a-s-levynn · 3 months
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I.. i just rewatched the love you want video because i needed exact reference for the sword.. and it only reached my brain that Vessel has a fucking wakizashi in it, not a katana or a tachi. He uses a fucking wakizashi you guys. That fuckin man.. arrrrggghhhh. It's infuriating -in the best way possible- how much attention to detail can be there with this collective. It's a backup weapon for close quarters and mainly beheading opponents. Which he tries to do btw with the dancers. BUT ALSO for harakiri sometimes. WHAT HE IS FORCED TO DO BEFORE THE LOOP BEGINS ANEW. HOW HAVE I MISSED THIS ALL THIS TIME.
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pepperpixel · 1 year
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Some art of Tori from @misfitmccoward ‘s Naruto fic Plasticity! Because!! It’s such a good fucking fic…! I had to do fanart for it!! honestly after I first read it I was so fucking hype about it that I was almost like “omg.. I have to do an animatic or something for this. it’s SO GOOD” but. My ability to do animatics has kinda flushed down the drain recently ghghg- But! Still!! I had to at least draw some fanart for it…!
#sorry if I got any details wrong! it’s been a few months since I read the fic!#I mean. I originally drew this right after first reading it. but! I only finished them now so. I might have screwed something up ggh-#but yeah! YEAH! OMG! I FUCKING LOVE THIS FIC!?!?!?!?#ITS SO GOOD!?!?#LIKE. ughghghggh. idk. I read it while still pretty deep in my head about awful life stuff#and just. reading Tori. going thru absolute HELL. was like. cathartic?? like my life. is not even a fraction of the shitshow hers is#but! JUST! STILL! like.. the way she responds to stuff… the delayed reactions. the attempts to just roll w the punches.#the fACT ALL OF HER POSSESSIONS ARE LIKE. MEANINGFUL AND IMPORTANT TO HER.#like that’s! a small detail in the grand scheme of the fic but the fact that sort of thing is commented on at all is like! FUCK.#I GET IT TORI I FUCKING GET IT#AND ITS SO FUN!!! like yeah shit is awful for tori basically ALL THE TIME. but it’s not! a downer to read! its fucking fun as hell to read!#the interactions between all the characters are SO GOOD! and entertaining!! literally EVERYTHING in this fic is a fucking delight!!!#and it’s like! ITS SO GOOD AT GETTING U TO ROOT FOR TORI! like!!!#yea I recognize Tori has slowly crossed all her moral and ethical lines and become. like. pretty fucked up.#but like! seeing that shift. coincide w the slow shift. towards everything in her life becoming NOT completely horrible#it’s just like!!! yes! girl! do what u gotta do! become a monster! get some happiness in ur life!#like it’s like… I love it so much. its such a fucking good fic. it’s sO FUN. I cannot overstate. how fun this fic is.#and Tori’s such an endearing character!! and everyone else is really likeable and well written too!#lIKE. IDK. ITS JUST A GREAT FIC DUDES. ITS GREAT#doodles#plasticity#blood#tori mendoza#also. the song that I was thinking of using for the animatic was gonna be ‘stupid intruders’#cuz I heard it and immediately was just like. OMG. THIS FITS THE VIBES SO WELL. like. it just felt very fitting ghgh#also also! Srry for misspelling ‘obviously’ in the first pic.. spelling is hard ghg-#but!! yeah!! have some art. of Tori! cuz I love her! and I love this fic!!#featuring 2 diff pics of her absolutely covered in blood from the 1st chapter! cuz. that was iconic…#and also I felt I didn’t properly convey the like. drowned rat energy the first time gGHG-#god ok I’m running out of tags now. U SHOULD READ THIS FIC IF U WANT ITS RLLY GOOD. highly recommend! it’s fucking great!
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cocklessboy · 11 months
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The biggest male privilege I have so far encountered is going to the doctor.
I lived as a woman for 35 years. I have a lifetime of chronic health issues including chronic pain, chronic fatigue, respiratory issues, and neurodivergence (autistic + ADHD). There's so much wrong with my body and brain that I have never dared to make a single list of it to show a doctor because I was so sure I would be sent directly to a psychologist specializing in hypochondria (sorry, "anxiety") without getting a single test done.
And I was right. Anytime I ever tried to bring up even one of my health issues, every doctor's initial reaction was, at best, to look at me with doubt. A raised eyebrow. A seemingly casual, offhand question about whether I'd ever been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. Even female doctors!
We're not talking about super rare symptoms here either. Joint pain. Chronic joint pain since I was about 19 years old. Back pain. Trouble breathing. Allergy-like reactions to things that aren't typically allergens. Headaches. Brain fog. Severe insomnia. Sensitivity to cold and heat.
There's a lot more going on than that, but those were the things I thought I might be able to at least get some acknowledgement of. Some tests, at least. But 90% of the time I was told to go home, rest, take a few days off work, take some benzos (which they'd throw at me without hesitation), just chill out a bit, you'll be fine. Anxiety can cause all kinds of odd symptoms.
Anyone female-presenting reading this is surely nodding along. Yup, that's just how doctors are.
Except...
I started transitioning about 2.5 years ago. At this point I have a beard, male pattern baldness, a deep voice, and a flat chest. All of my doctors know that I'm trans because I still haven't managed to get all the paperwork legally changed, but when they look at me, even if they knew me as female at first, they see a man.
I knew men didn't face the same hurdles when it came to health care, but I had no idea it was this different.
The last time I saw my GP (a man, fairly young, 30s or so), I mentioned chronic pain, and he was concerned to see that it wasn't represented in my file. Previous doctors hadn't even bothered to write it down. He pushed his next appointment back to spend nearly an hour with me going through my entire body while I described every type of chronic pain I had, how long I'd had it, what causes I was aware of. He asked me if I had any theories as to why I had so much pain and looked at me with concerned expectation, hoping I might have a starting point for him. He immediately drew up referrals for pain specialists (a profession I didn't even know existed till that moment) and physical therapy. He said depending on how it goes, he may need to help me get on some degree of disability assistance from the government, since I obviously shouldn't be trying to work full-time under these circumstances.
Never a glimmer of doubt in his eye. Never did he so much as mention the word "anxiety".
There's also my psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with ADHD last year (meeting me as a man from the start, though he knew I was trans). He never doubted my symptoms or medical history. He also took my pain and sleep issues seriously from the start and has been trying to help me find medications to help both those things while I go through the long process of seeing other specialists. I've had bad reactions to almost everything I've tried, because that's what always happens. Sometimes it seems like I'm allergic to the whole world.
And then, just a few days ago, the most shocking thing happened. I'd been wondering for a while if I might have a mast cell condition like MCAS, having read a lot of informative posts by @thebibliosphere which sounded a little too relatable. Another friend suggested it might explain some of my problems, so I decided to mention it to the psychiatrist, fully prepared to laugh it off. Yeah, a friend thinks I might have it, I'm not convinced though.
His response? That's an interesting theory. It would be difficult to test for especially in this country, but that's no reason not to try treatments and see if they are helpful. He adjusted his medication recommendations immediately based on this suggestion. He's researching an elimination diet to diagnose my food sensitivities.
I casually mentioned MCAS, something routinely dismissed by doctors with female patients, and he instantly took the possibility seriously.
That's it. I've reached peak male privilege. There is nothing else that could happen that could be more insane than that.
I literally keep having to hold myself back from apologizing or hedging or trying to frame my theories as someone else's idea lest I be dismissed as a hypochondriac. I told the doctor I'd like to make a big list of every health issue I have, diagnosed and undiagnosed, every theory I've been given or come up with myself, and every medication I've tried and my reactions to it - something I've never done because I knew for a fact no doctor would take me seriously if they saw such a list all at once. He said it was a good idea and could be very helpful.
Female-presenting people are of course not going to be surprised by any of this, but in my experience, male-presenting people often are. When you've never had a doctor scoff at you, laugh at you, literally say "I won't consider that possibility until you've been cleared by a psychologist" for the most mundane of health problems, it might be hard to imagine just how demoralizing it is. How scary it becomes going to the doctor. How you can internalize the idea that you're just imagining things, making a big deal out of nothing.
Now that I'm visibly a man, all of my doctors are suddenly very concerned about the fact that I've been simply living like this for nearly four decades with no help. And I know how many women will have to go their whole lives never getting that help simply because of sexism in the medical field.
If you know a doctor, show them this story. Even if they are female. Even if they consider themselves leftists and feminists and allies. Ask them to really, truly, deep down, consider whether they really treat their male and female patients the same. Suggest that the next time they hear a valid complaint from a male patient, imagine they were a woman and consider whether you'd take it seriously. The next time they hear a frivolous-sounding complaint from a female patient, imagine they were a man and consider whether it would sound more credible.
It's hard to unlearn these biases. But it simply has to be done. I've lived both sides of this issue. And every doctor insists they treat their male and female patients the same. But some of the doctors astonished that I didn't get better care in the past are the same doctors who dismissed me before.
I'm glad I'm getting the care I need, even if it is several decades late. And I'm angry that it took so long. And I'm furious that most female-presenting people will never have this chance.
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pasukiyo · 7 months
Text
BEAUTIFUL THING
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mike schmidt x f!reader word count; 2,573 warnings; smut, no plot, just porn :D summary; there was nothing in the world she wanted more than mike schmidt. but what were the chances he'd ever make a move on her?
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 She wanted Mike Schmidt.
 Don’t get her wrong, she absolutely adored Abby, she was sweet, funny, and overall not a hard kid to take care of. But she knew all too well what her intentions were when she agreed to take up the babysitting job— how could she say no when he looked at her like that with those big, deep brown eyes?
 It was another late night spent at the Schmidt house— Mike had just gotten himself a new job with unholy hours, some late night security gig he had no choice but to take. Her mouth opened in a yawn and through her bleary vision, she blinked down to the watch on her wrist. 
 4:30 AM. Mike wouldn’t be back for another hour and a half or so. 
 She sighed and threw her head back against the cushions, staring absentmindedly at the television as some old cartoon played, audio soft and muffled. She wasn’t sure why she even bothered trying to stay up for Mike— she’d been babysitting for him for months, (without pay, might she add) and still, neither he nor she had made any moves. She wasn’t even sure if he ever even intended to make a move on her. 
 But she was just so certain that he felt at least some sort of attraction towards her. She could see it in the way he looked at her, how his eyes would absentmindedly trail down her body against his better judgment, how he’d pull the inside of his bottom lip between his teeth while he did. She could see it in the way his body would react when she came too close, like when she gave him a handshake or playfully shoved his shoulder.
 It was the same way she reacted when he was close. 
 Surely it couldn’t all be for nothing?
 Her eyelids were falling heavy against her eyes and she slowly slumped further into the cushions of the couch, hands tightening around the blanket around her body. Sleep was so close that she could reach out and feel it, and she would’ve slipped into the arms of slumber if it hadn’t been for the opening and closing of the front door. 
 She grumbled and furrowed her brows down at her watch. 
 4:35 AM. Mike wasn’t supposed to be home yet. 
 At the notion, she jolted and snapped her head towards the entrance, her heart thrumming against her chest as she prepared herself for the sight of a total stranger, ready to make a run straight for Abby’s room. She blinked and narrowed her eyes at the dark silhouette of the figure as it hung its coat on the rack bolted on the wall. 
 “Sorry. S’ just me.”
 She knew that voice. It was a voice she always dreamed about, a voice belonging to someone she’d seen practically everyday.
 “Mike?” Her voice came out rough, having not spoken for hours, not since Abby had gone to bed. “What are you doing home so early?” She asked as she pushed herself further up the sofa while Mike made his way towards the recliner, wiping a hand down his face before plopping down into the seat. She could only make out his face through the light from the television but even then, she could sense something was off. 
 Mike tapped his fingers against the armrest of the recliner, “I… I just… needed to leave… I guess,” he replied and she frowned, scooting to the far side of the couch closest to him. “Is… is everything alright?” She questioned, unsure whether or not he needed consoling. Mike leaned further back into his seat and let his eyelids flutter closed, inhaling deep through his nostrils. 
 “Just… is Abby asleep?” He finally asked after a moment and she nodded, humming. “She went down earlier than usual. Actually managed to get her to eat something,” she replied, her lips curving into a smile but quickly faltering again when she realized Mike wasn’t going to reciprocate. He looked almost… distraught. 
 Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, she pondered her options. She’d known Mike for some time but even then, she still knew little to nothing about him. He slept a lot, that was for sure. And he loved his little sister and was trying so hard to be exactly the type of person she needed. But she knew nothing about him, Mike Schmidt himself. She didn’t know what he did in his free time, what he liked to eat, if he had hobbies, nothing. 
 Hell, she’d spent so much time fantasizing about him and filling in all the holes herself, she hardly even acknowledged that he could be somebody entirely else. She didn’t know the first thing about him.
 But she could learn to try. 
 She leaned forward, a steady hand warily finding his on the armrest of the recliner and she flinched when Mike snapped his eyelids open, looking between her and their touching hands. Their gazes surged into one another and she made no moves, as if seeking any sign that she should stop.
 Mike’s heart thrummed so hard inside his chest, it was a miracle that she couldn’t hear it. She looked at him as if she were asking permission— permission to what, he hadn’t even the slightest clue. But in spite of the voices inside of his head telling him he shouldn’t, that he shouldn’t let her, that he was wrong for her, he did. How could he say no when she looked at him like that, as if he were the most beautiful thing she’d ever laid eyes upon?
 His silence gave her the confidence to let her fingers creep further down to the back of his hand, flipping it around until they rested against the heel of his palm. Slowly, she soothed the tips of her fingers up his palm until they fell between the cracks of his, letting her digits curl around his knuckles. Mike shuddered at the touch and let his own fingers press down against hers and he watched as she raised their intertwined hands to her mouth, their gazes molded together as she pressed her lips against his skin. His lips trembled as they fell open and he narrowed his eyes, clinging onto the last bit of restraint he had left. 
 “You can relax with me, Mike,” she whispered against his skin, pressing another soft kiss to the knuckle of his ring finger. “You don’t have to worry while I’m around.”
 Mike pressed his lips back together and fought back the urge to groan at her words, his eyes wandering from their hands, down her arm, to her chest where it pressed against the edge of the sofa. His breath shuddered when he exhaled and the rubber band stretched inside of him finally released and with it, the last of his restraint. 
 Fuck it, he thought. It’s been long enough.
 Mike tugged her closer by the hand and her lids widened, a squeal slipping from her lips, in which he was swift to eat right up, pressing his mouth against hers. With his hand not intertwined with hers, he gripped her hip, working his way up to her waist to squeeze. The sound she made was muffled inside their admittedly messy kiss and he pulled her even closer, her knees having nowhere to go but on the outside of his thighs. 
 Mike groaned and pulled away to catch his breath as her hips ground down against his, already feeling frustrated with the growing erection in his jeans. He blinked up at the woman on top of him, her arms thrown over his shoulders, her chest heaving as she chased air back into her lungs. She stared down at him with hazy irises, still bleary from lack of sleep. 
 “Sorry,” Mike finally managed to breathe out, his palms resting on either of her thighs. “Probably a little much, wasn’t it?”
 He watched as the corners of her lips curved into a grin and she chuckled breathlessly, shaking her head. “Not enough,” she tittered as she surged her lips back into his, one of her hands on his shoulders slithering their way into his mess of dark tendrils, fingers curling and tugging at his roots. He hissed inside her mouth and dug his fingernails into her skin, a whimper falling from her lips, allowing him to take control of the situation. 
 He pressed himself forward and reached for the end of her t-shirt and she briefly broke away to allow the fabric up and over her head, her own fingers already working at the buckle of his belt. Mike leaned forward to pepper kisses all across the tops of her breasts and she threw her head back as he took over in undoing his belt, ripping it from his loops and throwing open the button and zipper of his jeans. 
 She clambered off of him as he raised his hips to tug his pants and boxers down just enough to allow his erection to spring free of its restraints, feeling her stomach do a somersault at the sight as she stripped herself of her own shorts and panties. Mike fought the urge to wrap his hands around his cock as she reached behind her back to undo the clasps of her bra and time seemed to slow as the straps fell from her shoulders, the lave toppling to the floor altogether. 
 He swore he could feel his mouth water and never before this moment had he wanted something, or someone, more. He blinked up at her, following her gaze down to his lap and at his erection that stood tall, waiting for her, dripping with pre-cum. 
 Mike cocked an eyebrow, “you just gonna stand there or you gonna take it?” He asked, voice low and husky and fuck, she thought she’d drop dead right then and there. Still, this was a dangerous game they were playing. “What about Abby?” She whispered, glancing towards the hallway where Abby’s room was. “What if she wakes up?”
 Mike pressed his lips together and bucked his hips, raising a leg to softly give her calf a kick. “You can be quiet, right?” He murmured in question and she felt herself clench from his voice alone. Here Mike Schmidt was, cock out and erect, all because of her. This was something she had only dreamed of— never did she think that this would become reality. 
 Mike cocked his eyebrow again and she shook herself from her thoughts, taking his hand as he guided her back onto his lap. Her body shuddered and her bones rattled as she began to sink herself down, jolting when the tip brushed against her cunt, teeth sinking down into the plush of her bottom lip to contain her sounds. 
 “It’s okay,” Mike whispered. “I got you.”
 Her eyes about rolled in the back of her head at that as his hands kneaded at the flesh of either of her hips, guiding her further down his length, making sure to go agonizingly slow to ensure she felt every single fucking inch of cock inside of her. Tears brimmed the outskirts of her eyelids as she finally sat still on his lap, filled to the brim with cock. Mike let her head fall down against the curve of his shoulder, burying her nose into the crook of his neck as she allowed time to adjust to his size, simultaneously trying to keep her sounds to a minimum. 
 “You’re so tight,” Mike’s breath shuddered in her ear and his voice made goosebumps litter her skin, his fingertips like the icy breath of a ghost against her back. “You think you can handle moving now?” He asked in a whisper against the shell of her ear and she nodded, letting him grab her thighs and push her further up his cock until just the head remained. She cried against his neck when he sank her all the way back down his length, the lewd noise of their wet skin slapping together making her clench around him. “Fff… uuck,” he dragged his curse out as he snapped his hips up against her.
 “Shit!” She gasped as he thrusted again and again and again. And she let him. She let him use her in whatever way he pleased. 
 “Gonna be good for me?” He muttered next to her ear. “Gonna let me take care of you, hm?” She nodded, bobbing her head up and down against his shoulder as he snapped his hips up to hers again and again, daring the coil inside her belly to snap. “Think you can handle it?” He asked again and she nodded once more, crying and biting down on his collar. “Yes!” She cried, fortunately muffled against his skin. 
 So Mike thrusted again, harder and harder, chasing that high, that release he so desperately needed. He could tell she was close— it’d probably been so long since she’d been stuffed by cock like this. She’d probably been waiting for this moment just as long as he has. 
 With the pad of his thumb, he pressed down against her aching bud and Mike could feel a fresh new set of tears soak his skin as she cried, bucking her hips into his touch. His thrusts were as sloppy as they were powerful and she wasn’t sure how much more she could take. 
 “Mmm… Mike… I’m… I’m gonna…” she hardly managed to stutter out, slowly feeling the coil inside her stomach as it began to unravel. 
 “Yeah?” Mike said, his other hand wrapped around her neck and pushing her forehead down against his, gazing up at her closed eyelids. He rolled his head against hers, “look at me,” he breathed out and watched as she slowly fluttered her lids back open, just as more fat tears beaded down her cheeks. The sight was enough to get him to teeter on the edge himself. 
 “Gonna come?” He asked and she nodded, sweat-slicked forehead lolling against his. He nodded too, already feeling her release around him as she spawned around his cock, relying solely on him and his body to keep herself up. She buried her face in the crook of his neck again as she whined and cried, Mike’s thrusts speeding up as he gave himself that final push he needed to send himself reeling, spiraling and shaking with the force of his release. 
 “Fuck,” he growled into the skin just below her ear, squeezing his eyelids shut tighter as he willed himself to keep his sounds on the low, for the sake of his little sister sleeping just in the other room. 
 Silence fell over Mike and the babysitter for a good, long moment as they both recovered from their highs, chasing air back into their lungs as the realization of what they had just done began to sink in. Mike should be mortified— she was his sister’s babysitter, he doesn’t have time for this, she doesn’t deserve him, he shouldn't have done this. 
 But the woman in his lap settled herself closer into him, nuzzling her nose against the crook of his neck, her lips like a crescent moon against his skin as she placed a soft kiss to his flesh there. 
 “I hope you’re okay, Mike,” she whispered and he threw his head back, an arm thrown around her body as he stared up at the ceiling. How could he push her away now?
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a/n; so yeah!!! i watched fnaf on friday and it kinda sorta just brought back my whole josh hutcherson phase so enjoy!! this was just a quick little something i wrote up and there's like no plot at all and not proofread LMAO
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yandere-writer-momo · 2 months
Text
Yandere Head Canons:
Sacrificial Bride
Yandere Dragon Shifter x Princess Reader
TW: Yandere behavior, manipulation, Somniaphilia (suggested), delusional yandede, complacency, etc.
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Feroc the Ferocious was the kind of dragon who would bring any silly knight to their knees. The kind of dragon that inspired legends and stories to be written in books. The kind of dragon that was larger than any castle human like could ever dream to build. The kind of dragon that could decimate a kingdom with a single breath of his fiery flames if he was angered… the dragon that your own people sacrificed you, the princess, to in order to save themselves from his wrath.
And so they bound you up and threw you before him. Your own father on his knees as he begged the great dragon for mercy in exchange for his own flesh and blood… the kingdom’s most prized beauty in exchange for peace. An offer Feroc quickly accepted before the king could utter another word!
Dragons collected beautiful treasures! Dragons hoarded their treasure in caves and abandoned castles fad from prying eyes… and unbeknownst to you, Feroc found you to be rhetorical most beautiful
For dragons, a sacrificial spouse was an ancient tradition and this was the first time he’d been offered such a perfect bride! How could he refuse you? Especially when your own people begged him so prettily? Would you beg for him just as beautifully one day?
And so you were scooped up in his ginormous talons and carried away in the sky to a lone tower deep in the mountains. Your new home… your home with Feroc.
You could recall how scared of him you used to be. You’d heard from many people of how this giant scaled beast before you was a man eater. Of how he swallowed many knights in his time… yet this dragon seemed so shy from your experience so far. Skittish even.
Feroc often brought you various jewelry and fine silks from his daily raids. There wasn’t a day that went by that he didn’t bring you a gift of some kind. His molten eagerly studied your form despite his persistent silence. Feroc’s company disturbed you as much as it comforted you.
It took a month for him to speak to you. His accent was heavy from the olden tongue he spoke but he knew the same language you spoke. His voice was booming and low, it could easily strike terror in others… but for some reason, his voice calmed you. Perhaps loneliness has finally crept its fangs into your heart? You weren’t sure…
Feroc would bring you anything you wanted to eat. Within means, of course. He’d bring you delicacies he’d likely looted off some poor caravan if you said you wanted sweets. There was no extremes he wouldn’t go to for you, which was odd since he was a dragon who’s been around for hundred of years… why did Feroc have such an interest in a human princess?
One day, you had a nightmare of a man standing in the corner of your room. Your scream in the night quickly alerted your guardian who peaked his large eye in your room in worry.
“Princess? What’s wrong?”
“I just had a nightmare… I thought there was a man in my room.” You wiped the sweat from your forehead while Feroc clicked his tongue.
“No man could ever scale his tower. I’m the only one who can enter. I’d never let anyone harm you.” The red and black dragon grumbled, his molten eyes glanced you once over. “Why? Do you… want a human companion?”
“I do get lonely sometimes.” You admitted to Feroc . His eyes now filled with hurt. “I do enjoy your company but… I miss being able to touch another human.”
Feroc didn’t understand your sentiment. He was a might dragon! The strongest of his kind! Feroc has proven himself to be the best of mates to you and yet you were still displeased? Was it because he was a dragon? Would you be happier if he showed you his other form?
“I’ll figure something out then… get some sleep.”
Feroc now snuck in your bedroom when you slept. He ghosted his clawed fingers over your oblivious form in wonder. His clawed fingers were too sharp, he’d have to dull them more… he didn’t want to cut up his pretty princess!
Feroc’s gentle touches progressed when he noticed how heavy of a sleeper you were. His desire to see what made you human drove him to insatiable heights. No area was left unexplored with his eyes. He needed to be perfect. Feroc had to be compatible with you. You and him were going to have young one day, after all! Feroc didn’t want to harm you in the process!
Feroc was able to mold his body into a perfect man. Once that was the perfect size for you, yet still immense so you’d know it was him. Feroc now stood at a massive seven feet tall rather than the hundred feet of his dragon form.
Yet there was a constant fear within him that you’d die of old age or of natural causes… Feroc knew humans were fragile creatures so he did what he had to. Feroc shared half of his heart with you while you slept. It was a simple spell and a painless procedure for you. One that would benefit the both do you in the long run!
If one of you died, the other would! You’d never age! You now shared a lifespan with him. Feroc couldn’t wait to tell you once the two of you made everything official!
It took another month for him to reveal this perfect form to you. Feroc had to let the excitement die down from sharing his heart with you so you didn’t freak out! Humans were such finicky creatures, after all! And he’d be an awful mate if he frightened you with a subject you had no knowledge on…
All you needed was to see this devilishly beautiful form of his and you’d be bewitched.
“Look at us… we’re so beautiful together.” Feroc whispered into the skin of your shoulder as he admired your reflection beside him. “I think I’ll find you more gold to decorate you with, my treasure.”
“Feroc, I don’t understand.” You jump when Feroc dragged his forked tongue across your exposed shoulder.
“You accepted all of my gifts and you’re the only one who suits me.” Feroc hissed his obsidian eyes flashed a bright gold. “Wouldn’t you rather be by my side than in my stomach?”
You gulped and obediently rested your head on his chest which made him purr in contentment. His muscular arms wrapped around yours as his wavy black hair tickled your skin.
“I’m joking, I’d never eat you.” Feroc smiled before he pressed a soft kiss to your cheek. “You’re my bride, after all.”
You didn’t need to know about how many knights he’s killed over the last few months for you. Feroc would take care of you until the day the both of you died. Every heinous act he’s ever committed over these last few months were all for his beautiful, blushing bride.
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hoshigray · 1 month
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Are you able to right a gojo fic? He pulls you aside after a meeting to a spicy makeout with you that leads to more than just a make out:,)
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𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: "more than a make out" indeed, lmao
⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: Gojo x afab/fem! reader - explicit reader; minors DNI - canon divergence; you're gojo's partner who works in Tokyo jujutsu tech with him - kissing; making out - fingering (f! receiving) - clitoral play (swiping and pinching) - breast sucking - deep impact position - praising - pet names (angel, baby, cutie, princess, sweetie) - cameos: Ijichi and Yaga - Gojo is a touch-starved fool, bless him lol.
⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3.1k
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“Y/n~~!”
“…! Oh, Gojo!”
“Ahh, it’s Gojo-sensei!”
Being the strongest sorcerer in the modern world is a hassle, no matter how much Gojo loves to shake it off as if it’s not. Not that he doesn’t mind it — no, no. If anything, he prides himself in it. It fills his ego, knowing that a scarce few could be compatible with his power. He’s a dependable light for the jujutsu world, sorcerers of the nation thankful that he's not on the wrong side. 
But alas, being the best has its taxing side, especially taking in tedious missions across the land and attending mandatory meetings with the entire jujutsu faculty body — not to mention being a teacher. The white-haired sorcerer was a busy man — no other way to explain it. However, the worst thing about it all was that there would be times when he’d have less time to spend with a certain someone who had him in the palm of their hands. And if he keeps being away from them, he might – no, will – malfunction. 
You were Gojo’s partner, his sweet baby that he cherished more than anything. You were a faculty member of Tokyo Jujutsu High, making things a little easier for the two of you to meet and elope (professionally). Nevertheless, those moments seem to frequent less and less with how many meetings have Gojo backed up this past week. The poor guy can’t even remember the last time he heard your sweet voice (which is a lie since you call every morning and night; he makes sure you do). 
Although, today would be different. Once this meeting with the Kyoto officials ended, he made a straight beeline out of the room to find you. And to his cheerful chuckle, he skips in your direction when he sees you conversing with Yuuji in the hallway. The salmon-haired teen greets his teacher with a high-five and a bow from you. 
Yuuji hears Megumi call for him from outside, so the boy dismisses himself with a goodbye and wanders off, leaving you and Gojo to yourselves. 
“Hello, Y/n~,” the man says your name with a happy tune, his lanky figure swaying to be close to you.
“Good noon, Gojo,” you greet him again with a modest smile as the tall man walks to you. “How was your meeting? Did the officials give you a tough ti—Mmmph!?”Your boyfriend surprises you with a kiss, taking in your perplexed moan with his pillowy lips. One peck comes after another while Gojo’s hands sneak to your waist. You quickly push him away, but his hold keeps you close to his figure. “G–Gojo, what are you doing!?” You express your concern in confusion, covering your lips with a hand. 
“Mmm? What do you mean? I’m greeting my princess with a kiss,” the blindfolded man says so matter-of-factly, beaming his delighted demeanor that nearly blinds you. “I miss you!”
“I miss you, too, but you can’t just—“ He tilts his head as you try to explain. You chew your lip with cheeks boosting in warmth, averting your glance away from his charming face that’s inching closer and closer to yours. His eyes are masked by the black cloth around his face; however, you can still sense the intensity of his gaze. “N-Not in public, Gojo...”
He plays the whining card, bringing you in for a tight hug that could restrain your breathing. “Ehhh, but I haven’t seen or touched you in days! See, we’ve been apart for so long that you’re going back to referring to me by my last name!”
“I always call you by your family name when in the school, no??”
“Yeah, but that’s only for when people are around, not just the two of us!” His complaints are genuine, swaying around with you in his arms. You roll your eyes, listening to him yap more. “Come on, Y/n; it’s been such a hectic week for me, missions after missions, meetings after meetings. Any more than this, and I just might combust — especially when I don’t have time to see my angel.”
You hear him make fake crying noises to your shoulder, reminding yourself how much your tall, strong boyfriend can be such a whiny puppy if he’s away from you for too long. But you can’t kid yourself; you missed spending time with him just as much as he did. “I know; I wanna see you more often, too. Don’t you worry, okay? This week is almost over, so keep pushing through like the tough man you are…Hehe, my strong Satoru.”
The snow-haired sorcerer springs up with a childish smile at the use of his name, his dimples present with the shine of his teeth. “If that’s what must happen, can your strong Satoru ask for another kiss to make his hell a little bearable?”
You give him a look at his request, but his anticipation doesn’t falter. With a sigh, you smile and whisper, “Just a kiss, Satoru?”
He chuckles lightly, drawing his mouth close to yours. “Yes, princess.”
His soft lips land on yours. There’s no restraint as you welcome him, your hands coming around to cup his cheeks before breaking the kiss. “One more,” he says before your nose is brushed away from his. You comply and place another gentler peck, and the man sneaks a hand from your waist to the back of your head. You withdraw your lips again, but Gojo utters another “One more…” Your stomach does flips knowing what game he’s trying to play. Another kiss is received, and his leg sneaks in between yours.
You mewl, finding yourself stuck in this predicament. He’s now in control, using this opportunity to deepen the kiss and make it more passionate, sucking your bottom lip and running his tongue for more access. You have no choice but to accept him, whimpering at the tongue intruding into your oral cavity while his leg moves further and further. 
Your hands come to his shoulders, gripping his jacket as the Gojo furthers himself into the kiss. The hand behind your head keeps you steady, keeping him focused on your mouth, where he sucks on your tongue in a way that leaves you breathless — like, actually. After he quits the kiss, you two are gasping for air so hard, and your lips are wet because of him. 
“Hahhh, ’Toru, stop,” you wipe spit from your mouth. “We can’t be doing this here…”
Your complaint falls on deaf ears, the sorcerer placing chaste kisses on your cheek. “Hmmm, why not?”
“Mmm..Someone, your students, we’d be caught here…”
Gojo smirks; it’ll never stop being adorable how bashful you are around him, particularly when he expresses his undying affection for you in public. But he will respect your wishes, and the idea that pops into his head makes him giggle.
Before you can process anything, Gojo picks you up with your legs held up and a hand on your back. You squeak at the unexpected action, grabbing a hold of his neck to balance yourself. Your mouth opens to express your bewilderment. Yet one moment, you two are in a hallway of the school; then you’re transported to a familiar room with a bed the next — your bedroom.
You blink in perplexity as Gojo throws you on top of your bed, stammering to find the right words. “Satoru, I wish you’d stop teleporting without letting me know! And don’t you have another meeting to get to!? Why are we in my apart—“ You don’t finish that sentence; you stop yourself once Gojo crawled up on the bed to you. Suddenly, you feel too small to utter a word.
“Sorry, baby,” No, he wasn’t. Not with that childish grin posted on his face. He brings his face to yours, placing more smacks on your lips. “But you’re the one who said we shouldn’t be doing this on school grounds. Heh, you act so cute when you’re shy…”
“No, Satoru, we can’t—Mmmm,” silencing you with kisses was such a vile card, knowing you’d be whimpering under him just from him twirling his tongue with yours. “Mmph..Mmah…! You’re scheduled for…another meet—“
“Shhh, don’t worry; I can be late for a few minutes,” another lie. If Gojo’s late to another meeting, Principal Yaga will put the younger man in a chokehold again. “I’ll make this quick, I promise. So, just let me enjoy you…”
Sucking your tongue is all it takes for you to give up on trying to persuade him out of what he’s doing. Gojo takes off and throws his jacket to the bedroom floor to let his black fitted tee breathe, and his hands initiate unbuttoning your blouse. He then slithers it down to the bottom of your long pencil skirt to pull up, greeting your undergarments with his digits. You jerk at the contact of his middle finger that presses on the damp spot of your panties, earning a faint, salacious laugh from Gojo. 
“Awww, did my baby get wet just from kissing earlier?” He rubs the underwear further, soaking the spot more with your fluids. Your thighs tremble, “Did you miss me that much?”
“Sato—Oooh!” He sinks his finger deeper into your entrance; the material barrier is so wet from your essence seeping through. “Your finger...Mmm.”
“What is it, cutie?” He whispers to your ear, and you have to bite down on your lip to suppress a moan. “You want my fingers?” You nod sheepishly, amusing the snow-haired man. “Now, Y/n, you know I want to hear you tell me what you want. Use your words, princess.”
You gulp to satiate your dry throat. “Yess, Satoruu, I want your fingers. Please, let me cum on your fingers…”
“That’s my angel,” he praises before straightening himself between your sheer pantyhose-covered legs. After sliding your damp panties off, he brings a leg to his shoulder and finally slides his blindfold off his face, his hair losing its spiky position and falling with gravity. Cerulean eyes catch a glimpse of your wet cunt in his sights, biting his lip. “Made such a pretty mess all for me, huh.”
His hand returns to your now bare chasm, sliding his ring and middle finger between your soaking folds. You hum to the touch, gripping on your blouse to use as reins. After a few seconds, he inserts the middle digit inside, immediately going to work after he pulls a gasp from your surprised body.
Slow motions sneak up on you, scraping your velvet texture with the blunt fingertip. His slender digit pushed and pulled from inside you, making sure you took him to the knuckle. He swirls it around, evoking shaky screams from him, scratching your inner walls so diligently. And your eyebrows furrow once the movement quickens.
“Hooohh, ohhh!” You threw your head back to the pillows. “Ahhnn, faster, go faster…”
“Hmm? You want me to go faster?” He teases with a perched brow. He does as asked, but with a catch; he sneaks his ring finger inside with your slick as lube. You shriek, two fingers now ravaging your insides and pleasing you with faster shifts. “Like this?” Did you even have to answer that; were you gripping the sheets and hips moving on their own not enough?
“Oooo, fuahhh, fuuckk, ‘Toru, nooo, y’re making me…Hoohh!”
“Yeah, that’s right,” he kisses your calf before placing his lips on your ankle to lick playfully. “Just let me make you feel all good.”
Fuck did Gojo miss this; it’s been more than a week since he’s had his hands on your body like this. The constant meetings have almost made him forget the warmth and plush of your frame. He needed this, like, BAD. He’s barely containing himself now; the image of your slit taking his fingers so well is bubbling his excitement, and the tent of his pants that shields a boner grows painfully hornier.
You were bound to cum on his fingers in no time, howling with an arched back when he does the ‘come hither’ motion and scrapes your inner walls. They contract around his digits as your legs tremble with the surge of your orgasm. Gojo loves the sight and stirs the fingers to tease your keen nerves more. “Good job, sweetie,” he kisses your ankle again while slowly removing his fingers from you, inserting them inside his mouth to lather his tongue with your juices. He almost caves in just from the taste.
But a sudden buzz in the pocket of his pants alerts him. He brings out his phone ringing with a call and presses the green button before pressing the device to his ear. “Yo, Ijichi.”
“Ah, thank goodness you picked up. Where are you; the meeting starts in a few minutes.”
“Mmm, I’m at Y/n’s,” even if you’re in a tiny daze, your face morphed into an expression of shock at his nonchalant honesty. “I’m only here to grab something real quick, and then I’ll head back to the school.”
“Are you sure…?”
He laughs, “Now, Ijichi, are you calling me a liar?”
That was precisely what he was — a whole liar.
“—Taahh, ahhhn, Sa’oruuuuu! Yer hitting shoo deep in—Saaahh!!”
It’s been a solid fifteen minutes after that call with Ijichi, and Gojo is still in the confines of your bedroom. He was very much late; of course, he was. Why would he not be? He finally has this chance to have you to himself, so he’s indulging it however long he wishes.
Gojo ripped you out of your clothes to meet with his clothing on the floor, leaving you bare and nude for him aside from your pantyhose. You’re lying on your side with one leg up on Gojo’s shoulder while the other is between his, and his cock now pushing to and fro inside your chasm that was filled with his come. 
His thrusts were sharp and rough, the curve of his dick jabbing areas in your vagina you never thought would be stimulated. Jesus, his length was dangerous, having you babbling incoherent words to the air and reaching so deep inside that you quaked under him. Your brain is stuck in a haze, especially since this is the second time he’s fucking inside you and made you cum a total of three times!
“Ohhmy, Gohhhd! Sato—Ohhhh…!!” He grasps around your leg to plunge himself further and faster, the work of his pelvis having you see stars.
“Hsshhh, God, you feel so fucking good, baby,” he coos sweetly, juxtaposing with the erratic pace of his hips that move your figure with every rut. Azure orbs take in the display before him; your naked body submitted to him to alleviate his week-long stress and please the both of you. Strands of his silverfish-white hair are drenched from the sweat built on his forehead. “—Hmmgh! Shit…keep clamping onto me like that.”
You chew on your lip, sneaking a hand down on your clitoris to whisk your fingers around it. Oh, it feels so good, playing with yourself as your boyfriend massages your insides. “Mmaaah, s’ good...”
“Hmm, what’s that?” His hips now go slow; the stretch his curve causes when entering inside has your toes curl. “What feels good?” He then snaps his pelvis to startle you.
“—Mmmph!! You! Y’u feel so good, ‘Toruuu..!”
“Heh, you feel amazing yourself, Y/n,” returning to an erratic rhythm, Gojo pumps his cock til the base kisses your squelching folds. His balls smack onto you after every push. He then curves downward for his face to be closer for you to hear him, “Hmmnn, you gonna be good and come again, right?”
You nod cursorily, your eyes shut to enhance the feeling of you rubbing on your bud. “Yesshh, I’m so close, I wanna cum…Want you to fill me u—Uuuhhn!!”
“Jesus, you look so fucking hot,” he grins before bringing his mouth to your nipple, his tongue dancing around the tip to harden. “Let’s cum together, okay, cutie?”
He sucks in your nipple as his thrusts go grim, and severe hits to your cunt result in you wailing far from your control. The tip of his cock picks at your silky walls so euphorically that you hum his name. A hand comes to your chest to keep you steady and synced with him, and he keeps rutting into you even when his body shudders as his load is exerted inside your tight slit. And you’re not far from him either; your orgasm seconds away from his hits you hard, and you quiver in the shocks coursing through your body.
As you two rock slowly through your crescendos, your essence mixes with his seed, and your sweaty bodies heave and pant for the third time this session. Gojo releases your nipple from his mouth after withdrawing his dick from inside, and his jizz seeps out of your frame. “Phew, man, how I needed that.”
You respond despite your brain feeling a bit all over the place. “Are you happy now?”
He laughs while kissing your cheek. “Thank you, princess!”
“You’re welcome, Toru,” you shook your head with a meek smile. “But you really should get going; I don’t want you getting in trouble with—“
KNOCK!! KNOCK!! KNOCK!!
An abrupt sound comes from the front door, confusing the both of you as the knock comes from out of nowhere. Nonetheless, you get up and wipe yourself quickly before putting your clothes back on. Gojo does the same as you walk out of the bedroom to see who’s at your door. And once you open the door, your heart meets your stomach.
“Y/n,” it was Yaga, the principal adorning his usual attire and sunglasses.
“Principal Yaga,” you greeted the older man with a hurried bow. “Wh–What can I do for you—“
“He’s here, isn’t he?”
Your lips flatten at the question, using the silence to speak for itself as you move out of the way for the principal to enter. Yaga apologizes for the intrusion before marching into your apartment and presumably going after the person still in your bedroom, who lets out an exclaimed shout of pain from what you can assume was from a punch to the head from his old teacher. 
The former instructor strolls back to the front door where you remained; Gojo is dragged on the floor behind him. “Sorry again for the inconvenience,” Yaga puts his shoes back on before exiting your home. You observe the men leave with a heavy sigh, waving goodbye to your snow-haired sorcerer as he’s pulled across the hall like a toddler.
“See ya, sweetie,” he cries out to you without regard to the neighbors hearing him, putting his blindfold back on. “I miss you already!”
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requests/thirsts are open hehe~ 🧸
© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ header edit done by me + dividers by @/benkeibear.
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livinginshambles · 9 months
Text
You're unbelievable (derogatory) | James Potter
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Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 5.3k
Summary: You're best friends with James, but since his new relationship with Lily, you find yourself standing on the side more often than not.
Your friendship with James breaks when he has to choose between you or Lily, and it's only after the damage is done that he realizes the consequences of his actions.
Note: Lily's kind of a not cool in this fic. Not proofread, mistakes (grammar and maybe continuity because I rewrote the middle from memory) Time lines are wrong, howarts is endless.
_______________________
“James Potter, you’re unbelievable!” You exclaimed, and if not for the widest grin ever plastered on you face, those words could hold an entirely different meaning. You gave James a tight side hug while you clutched your precious gift to your chest.
“Well, you better believe it darling,” Sirius appeared on your left. “Prongs made us stand in line for that signed copy for eight hours. EIGHT HOURS,” he complained and shook James back and forth by his shirt collar.
“And not to mention, he woke us up at 2 o’clock in the morning for that,” Peter happily reminded him, and Sirius wailed at the memory and dramatically dropped to his knees. You stumbled back and James was quick to hold you steadily.
“Oh, quit it with the theatrics,” Remus mused, and he pulled Sirius up from the floor where he had slouched his entire weight against your legs. “It wasn’t that bad.”
Sirius huffed. “For you maybe. Because you secretly wanted to get your book signed too,” he accused Remus. Remus sheepishly shrugged.
James pressed a kiss to your temple, and you melted inside. “Happy birthday, love,” he whispered with a fond smile, and you bashfully looked away.
“Thanks,” you muttered awkwardly. Godric, you despised the attention that birthdays bring along.
“On that note, I’m heading towards the library,” you excused yourself. “But thank you guys so much for getting that book for me, I love you guys so much,” you said and blew them a kiss as you stepped backwards to the door.
“Hold on,” James frowned. “We’re not celebrating?”
“Uh, no I have to work on our Potions assignment.”
“Oh. Well, let me walk you to the library, yeah?” James offered, but you had an inkling feeling that it wasn’t really a question.
You laughed and pulled a face at him. “I can’t stop you anyways, can I? You’re an absolute menace, Potter.”
“I’m just trying to spend the day together.” James wrapped an arm around you and guided you towards the door. 
“You know, the day on which the world has been blessed with your birth. And just as it was always meant to be, might I add, because look at where this led, such a perfectly beautiful day to celebrate.” He winked.
“Today is a wonderful day,” you hummed in agreement. “But you know I was supposed to be born late April, not March. So not really ‘as it was always meant to be’ at all,” you pointed out.
James rolled his eyes. “Uh, yes it was. Otherwise, we would’ve never met at the hospital and become bestest friends.”
“That’s not even correct gramm-”
“Besides, didn’t see you much today,” James unbotherdly continued.
You shook your head in amusement. “Come along then,” you pretended to relent in a joking manner. James was already pulling you along anyway.
You looked back at the rest of the marauders. “You guys also coming?”
You got an unenthusiastic hum from Peter and nothing from Remus, who was too deep in his book to have heard you. You looked at Sirius.
“Darling, I love you, but that’s six flights of stairs,” Sirius laughed, and he settled in on the sofa.
You gasped in fake horror. “So, is that the limit of your love for me?” You sniffed and pretended to wipe away a tear. “I guess-, I guess that’s it then. We’re just not meant to be,” you sighed.
“I know, darling. And I’m sorry. Just know, it’s not you, it’s me,” Sirius solemnly agreed.
You opened your mouth to continue your devastating-sad-ending-love-story when James, who had felt strangely annoyed at Sirius, impatiently grabbed your hand and pulled you out the door.
You enjoyed the feeling of walking hand in hand with James, even though it was short-lived. He let go of your hand as soon as he realized he was still holding it, and you two walked next to each other in a comfortable silence. Again, short-lived.
“I swear, one of these days, Lily might give me a chance. She smiled at me yesterday after supper, you know.” James happily bragged, eyes in a dreamy haze, no doubt imagining Lily.
You peered up at him and quietly admired his blissed look. It may never be directed towards you but seeing him so happy really made you glad and all warm inside.
Not that you’d ever let him know that.
Instead, you snorted at his words, tiptoed, and slung an arm across his broad shoulders. “In your dreams, maybe,” you sassed at him. James wanted to huff at your reply, but at your struggle to reach his other shoulder, he couldn’t help but laugh wholeheartedly, and he wrapped his arms around your shoulder instead.
“You’ve got to stop growing, James,” you protested and ducked out from under his arm.
“Quite the opposite actually, perhaps you should start,” he mocked you and you reached out to shove him but he put a step back out of the way fluently and then smoothly pulled back his shoulder just in time when you tried to shove him again. “So predictable,” he tsked. You opted to stick out your tongue instead.
“So,” James started. You hummed in reply. “Mum’s asking if you’re spending Easter with us again,” he casually mentioned.
“Oh really, Euphemia is asking me huh,” you teased him.
James looked away embarrassedly.
“Hm, not sure,” you shrugged nonchalantly. “Think I’m gonna be sort of preoccupied with my cousins from Ireland,” you looked at him through the corner of your eyes and caught his disappointed expression. A grin grew on your face like that of a Cheshire cat and you nudged him again.
“Oh, come on James, I’m kidding, you know. I’ve literally never not spent Easter with you. Besides, I live right across the street, James. I can literally come over any time, even if my cousins visit.”
“Yeah, but I meant like stay over at my house for the whole holiday,” James pouted. You glanced at him and smiled fondly. “Well, again; I live right across the street. So I guess I can also just go and visit my cousins at my house any time.”
You finally reached the bottom of the staircases and stopped mid-step. “Bloody hell, I forgot my books.”
You shot James a sheepish smile. “Sorry, I just have to go back up real quick, but it won’t be long at all-.”
“I’m right behind you, love.”
“You can’t be serious,” you gaped at him.
James was beaming. Sirius and Remus’ jaws were slacked on the floor and Peter frowned as if he was trying to comprehend James’ statement.
“She agreed to a date!?” Sirius shrieked out. “But-,” Sirius stammered and he let his eyes fall onto you for a split second. It was very quiet for a moment while all of you processed this news.
“Well, I’ll be damned, Prongs,” you grinned up at him. “Not such a far-fetched idea after all.” You smiled encouragingly at him and he shot you a grateful look.
“Congrats,” you nudged him, and that seemed to break the rest of the marauders out of it, all congratulating and offering date ideas.
You zoned out for a moment. A bitter-sweet taste in your mouth. You we’re thrilled for James. You knew how much she meant to him. But that little piece of hope that you had unconsciously clung onto, made the news tough to take.
Regardless, you were just happy to have James in your life. He was your best friend, and you would support him, no matter what. Because you knew he’d do the same for you.
“When’s the date?” you curiously asked.
James scratched his head. “Uh, next week, Friday night.”
“Wait, Friday when you were going to take me to see the blue crescent moon?” you deadpanned.
“I’ll take you to the next one, I promise,” James solemnly swore and he put his hand on his heart.
You huffed in disappointment but quickly turned around to face Remus with a sweet smile. “Remus, my best friend,” you started, and instantly got pulled back by James who wore a pout on his face.
“Wait, it was supposed to be a you and me thing,” he whined while he tugged you back into his side. You stuck your tongue out and ruffled his hair.
“You’re busy, and the next blue moon is going to be a full moon, so we’ll be with Remus,” you pointed out. “And after that, it’ll be another two years until the next.” Then you skipped back over to Remus.
James hummed in thought. He knew you were right. “Fine,” he reluctantly said. “But I’m taking you to watch the passing comet next month,” he bargained.
You stuck out your hand with a laugh. “Deal,” you grinned.
“It’s a promise,” James confirmed.
It became clear to you that you might have overestimated your own importance to James after he and Lily officially started dating.
Your eyes were searching for James, and you decided to confront him when you spotted him.
“James!” You ran to catch up to him. You smiled at Lily with a small wave. “Lily,” you acknowledged her. “Can I borrow him for a moment?” You asked her. She shrugged and waved her hand in a discarding manner, “of course.”
“Hey uh, you didn’t show up yesterday, just checking in?” you asked James in concern when Lily was out of reach.
James mind blanked for a moment. He was racking his brain about ‘yesterday’ and his eyes grew wide when realization hit him. “Bloody hell, I completely forgot!” He exclaimed.
“Yeah,” you laughed, relieved that he was alright and had just forgotten about it.
“Well you didn’t show up in the astronomy tower so I tried looking for you, but I couldn’t find you. I asked Sirius for the map, but can you believe it? He said he’d lost it.”
You chuckled when you recalled his apologetic expression and completely missed the way James shut his eyes and pinched his nose in guilt.
“I’m so sorry,” James said. He pulled you into a hug.
“Eh, don’t worry about it, Sirius joined me to watch the comet pass by. Wasn’t that impressive, but it did look like a falling star so I guess I made a wish, and-”
“Can have him back now?” Lily’s voice came from behind him, and he quickly released you. “Yeah, of course,” you rushed to say, but she had already grabbed him by the arm and led him away.
James looked back at you and mouthed a ‘sorry’ at you. You shook your head dismissively and raised your thumbs up.
It was only during the next missed hangout, two weeks later, that you found out he forgot because he’d been with Lily instead.
Peter had seen you off to find James, and had watched you return three hours later, a sad look on your face.
“Not again,” he’d groaned and slipped up. You couldn’t be angry at James because you realized that he was just putting effort into his new relationship. Peter had hugged you and you two had spent the evening sneaking into the art room to paint each other.
Peter was surprisingly a splendid artist and you had put the painting that he painted of yourself against the wall on the floor next to your bed, and gave Peter the one you painted of him.
“Damn, Peter,” James nodded at the canvas. “You painted that?”
“Huh? Oh,” Peter was getting dressed and pulled his sweater over his head. He looked from the painting to James. “Uh, Y/N did,” he beamed. “It looks good right?”
“You guys painted..?”
“Yeah, cause you didn’t show up again yesterday,” Peter casually mentioned. “You know, she was-“ He didn’t get to finish his sentence, because James had already sprinted out of the room to find you to apologize.
But as usual, James thought it had to be a grand gesture.
Flowers! Lily liked flowers. Girls like flowers, perfect. The idea popped up in his head, and he went to work to cover your entire dorm and bed with flowers.
It seemed like a perfect idea.
Until it evidently wasn’t. 
“Shit, I’m so sorry, it slipped my mind,” James apologized for the thousandth time as he sat by at the side of the hospital bed with the rest of the marauders. They shared a look with each other.
“Well, I bet you’ll never forget about my severe flower allergy ever again now,” you joked in attempt to console him. Your face was swollen and your eyes were bloodshot.
You smiled at James and tried to push back the hurt you felt at the fact that he forgot about something as important as that.
“I’ll make it up to you,” James quickly promised with a grimace.
“Do you get that same sense of déjà vu or is it just me,” Sirius remarked from the other side of the bed.
“No, I get it too,” Peter agreed almost too quickly.
James frowned at his friends for the little jab. They knew he didn’t do it on purpose right? He looked at Remus for support.
“Better be one hell of an idea,” was all he said.
“Oh come on,” you attempted to kick Sirius weakly with your leg but failed because your legs were still half paralyzed.
“Stop giving him such a hard time,” you started. James shot you a relieved look.
“He’s already feeling shit for almost killing me,” you grinned and James groaned and dropped his head on the side of your bed. You moved your arm with some effort and let your fingers stroke through his hair.
“I’ll be the best best-friend there is, starting from right now. I’ve got so many ideas for Easter holiday and it includes your favorite chocolate,” he promised in a muffled voice.
 
Whatever you imagined his ideas for activities during the Easter holiday included, it wasn’t with Lily in the picture. Yet here you were, sitting across of her at the dinner table.
They were both deeply engrossed in each other and you and Fleamont shared a look.
“How’s your year been, sweetheart?” Fleamont asked and he looked at you over his glasses. You smiled at him, relieved.
“It was great so far, I mean, despite being bedridden for two weeks, but the guys have been great,” you jumped to talk about your adventures.
“I went to watch the blue crescent moon with Remus, and the comet with Sirius. And I’ve painted with Peter! I’ve got to say, he’s painted me in a flattering light,” you rambled on passionately.
“Oh, and we’ve started a study group thing together, it’s basically just Remus and I trying to help Sirius and Peter though,” you lightheartedly joked.
“We’ve played some harmless pranks too, like turning every toad into a cat and every cat into a toad, it was utter chaos!” You shared and at his disapproving look and focus on James, you quickly intervened. “Don’t worry, James didn’t do anything, he’s been good,” you joked.
You missed Fleamont’s raised eyebrows.
“I’ve been swimming in the lake with the boys and pranked Remus and Peter with Sirius and pretended to be merpeople, you should’ve heard their screams!”
Your eyes were gleaming at this point as you relived your happiest moments so far. “Well, until Remus cast a spell on Sirius that turned him into a slug of course.”
“So when the four of us went to Hogsmeade…” You continued to ramble on and failed to notice how James’ eyes subconsciously trailed over to you every now and then, listening in on the conversation and realizing his name never fell once.
Lily noticed his divided attention and was unsurprisingly and rather justifiably annoyed at James.
She voiced out her concerns to James that very night during which you had excused yourself and gone home across the street.
You didn’t want to third wheel and Godric forbid should you share a room with Lily.  She hated your guts as it was and you didn’t feel like being smothered in your sleep.
When you had offered to go back home, you had sort of hoped he would say something along the lines of “No, please stay” and instead were met with a “Yeah, that’s probably for the best”.
And now, all he could wish for was chilling on his bed with you next to him while he was being chastised by Lily. His eyes glanced up and he stared at the enchanted bedroom ceiling full of stars, Lily’s voice long gone from his mind.
“Are you even listening to me?” She waved her hand in front of his face and he fought the urge to pull an annoyed face at her.
At his lack of response though, she repeated herself. “I’m your girlfriend. I thought you wanted this?”
James let her words sink in for a moment. She was all he ever wanted. And it was so so different from what he’d imagined it would be like.
Of course, he wasn’t planning on breaking up or anything, he didn’t want to be that douchebag that was only in it for the chase after all. And he hoped somehow that those feelings would return sometime.
She was everything he wanted. He just wished she’d be more interested in his friends, less disapproving of his pranks, or more proud of his achievements at Quidditch.
He would appreciate it if she were just a little bit more patient with him, and shared a little bit of his humour.
He just wanted her to be more open and enthusiastic about their relationship and himself.
He wanted her to be a little more like you-
He reeled back from that revelation. Oh.
Oh no. That would ruin his friendship.
“-and you know what, you can’t have both, James,” Lily continued and he snapped out of his thoughts.
“I can’t be your girlfriend if she’s in the picture. So choose. It’s me or her.”
James stared at her in surprise and then walked out of his room without another word to her.
He looked out the window at the real starry night sky. It seemed to him that he’d lose you regardless. But maybe, he’d be happy with Lily. She was all that matters, he convinced himself.
“Don’t you see how wrong it is that she’s making you choose,” you asked him incredulously, but your eyes looked at him pleadingly. James forced himself to look back at you and shook his head.
“No, she’s-, she’s right,” he mumbled, and you staggered back at that. “I mean, you’re a girl, you know?” You raised your eyebrows in an unimpressed manner. “Astute observation.” You dryly remarked.
“And everyone assumes things about us, so please, you have to understand that this isn’t fun for Lily either,” James tried. “I just can’t be friends with you and be in a relationship with Lily at the same time.”
You opened your mouth to protest, but he cut you off.
“I can’t,” he urged. “And between you or her, I choose her. She’s my girlfriend,” he reasoned.
“And I’m your best friend since we were born,” you stubbornly retorted.
James looked at you beggingly, hoping that you’ll understand his predicament and that you’d make it easy on him. At the squint of your eyes and the deepening frown on your face, he gulped. “Please. I’m really sorry, but I have to choose her,” he finished weakly, doubling down on his decision.
Realizing that he wasn’t joking, it felt like he might as well have punched you in the gut. Your stubborn look flickered to hurt and then morphed into an ice-cold front of indifference.
You took a deep breath and collected yourself. You stared at him up and down, not recognizing your best friend in him anymore.
“You’re unbelievable,” you shook your head at him, and your voice was devoid of any emotion. With no other words to address the situation, you pushed past him roughly.
Months passed by and the summer vacation started. Then it ended and Hogwarts began again. All without a word from James. He had stopped spending much time with the marauders, mostly busy with walking after Lily.
Sometimes he would glance at you when she wasn’t watching, and he’d feel so lonely.
He waited for you during the vacation, but you never went to yourr house across his. Instead you spent your time with your cousins in Ireland.
When he made his way towards the platform on September 1st,  he felt weird. First of all, he was slightly reluctant to go. He realized that he had thoroughly enjoyed his holiday without Lily.
But secondly, and perhaps most importantly; This was the first time ever that he went to the Hogwarts Express by himself, without you by his side, and an epiphany cleared his mind. Everything was so wrong.
 
You eyed him up and down. With lack of better words, he looked terrible. So terrible, that you might’ve pitied him any other time, because how could you ever be angry at James, when he looked so sad.
When his eyes are glassy and red. When his hair is disheveled as a result of an undoubtedly rough night. When his voice cracked at his sloppy apology. Or when his lips trembled almost unnoticeably when you said no.
But all of that wouldn’t magically clear away your own misery of the past months.
“I was supposed to be your best friend,” you enunciated slowly. “It’s always been you and me. Merlin, we’ve known each other since we were born and they ran out of baby cribs at St. Mungo’s, so they put us together in one!” you exclaimed.
You bitterly scoffed to yourself at the reminder of your literal lifelong friendship.
“But you cut me off for a relationship with Lily? Lily who rejected you for years and when she finally did agree to date you, never even gave you the time of the day?”
You stared at him incredulously and had to remind yourself to tone down your voice a little. You had unconsciously been raising it and didn’t want to attract unwanted attention.
“You followed her around like a lost puppy and cast me aside because she didn’t trust you for being friends with a girl and you were so easy to discard me,” you laughed humorlessly, trying to mask your hurt feelings. “I guess I must’ve really not meant all that much to you.”
To James’ credit, he at least had the decency of looking remorseful. His own words were replaying on a loop in his head. Of course he regretted it all.
“You can’t come back after that and expect me to just open my arms for you,” you firmly stated.
James looked at you helplessly, and you let out another laugh in disbelief. “Oh, Godric, you did,” you stared at him with wide eyes in surprise.
James could feel himself getting flustered and spoke up again. “I just thought that maybe-,”
“No, no, no. Like I said, I’m not doing this again.”
“Please, lov-, Y/N please, if you would just let me prove to you that you do mean so much to me,” His voice was getting increasingly more desperate. “I just want-, I need you to give me a second chanc-”
“A second chance? James, you are way past that. You’ve already had a second chance,” you bitterly told him. “Merlin, I’ve given you a second, third, fourth, fifth, and sixth chance. I would’ve given you a thousand chances, but even that, you threw away.”
You tiredly rubbed your face. “I have nothing left to give you.”
Your words hit him in the face and his chest tightened.
“Oh… No, I-, I definitely understand.” His voice came out quietly.
James wanted to hide away. He felt utterly pathetic and ashamed at his own actions.
“I’ll uh, I’ll leave you alone, then.” He turned around but stopped mid step.
“But Y/N? If you ever change your mind, or if you ever need me, I’ll be there for you this time. Always right behind you.” James let his eyes linger on your face for a moment, taking you in. Merlin, he really missed you.
Your mind struggled to find the words to properly articulate all that you’ve felt these past months.
“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too. For not trying to fight for you more,” you sympathetically offered.
“Oh, what? No, that’s-, it really was all my own fault. I chose her over you, and it was stupid. I was stupid, not you.”
“I don’t know. I feel like I should’ve tried harder to find a solution. I regret it too, you know, that we lost us.”
James frowned at your words.
“You-, I don’t even-,” you sighed. “I thought we would be in it for life, you know,” you eventually confessed, and James eyes widened. He wasn’t sure if he understood that completely, but his heart had made a small jump at your confession. Surely you didn’t actually mean…?
“Maybe not side by side as lovers or anything,” you quickly tried to cover yourself, but instead confirmed James’ thoughts. “But I was so sure we’d be partners nonetheless.” James watched you smile fondly, but sadly at the thought.
“I tried so hard not to be jealous of the fact that I was no longer the first person you’d go to for everything.” You chewed on your lower lip and James forced himself to pry his eyes away from it.
“You could be again,” James whispered to himself. But it was loud enough for you to hear it. You chose to ignore it and the way your heart tugged.
“But it was never an issue of jealousy when you actively forgot me on so many different occasions and then just kicked me out for her.”
“I'm sorry, I don’t know why I… how I even…”
“Look, I have to go,” you settled on, and nodded awkwardly at him. “But thanks for apologizing,” you added before you left.
You’d gone about your life according to the same routine of the past few months and paid James little to no mind. Though he was spending all of his time with the marauders again, you somehow found a way of disappearing right when he would arrive.
Days passed and James watched you laugh at the punchline of the joke that a ghost had told you. So close and yet so far.
James knew that you told him no when he had asked if things could go back to the way they were, but he couldn’t give up on you. It was as if something was physically stopping him from doing so.
He wanted you to see him again, but would never cross your boundaries, which left him in a difficult position.
The first opportunity presented itself when he overheard some guy talk shit about you. Except he only saw red instead of an opportunity. Because how dare they.
“She’ll give in someday. I’ll show her how to have a good time. Godric knows she’s too prudish, wouldn’t even let me-“
James surged forward before he could even think and grabbed the guy by the collar, his wand was pointed at the boy’s throat in a matter of seconds, a piercing glare on his face as he gritted through his teeth.
“Don’t.” It was a warning and the boy heeded it and scrambled away when James released him.
“What are you looking at,” he called out to the students that had stopped to watch what was happening. They too, quickly scrambled away, pretending they hadn’t seen a thing.
But by supper, everyone had heard about it, including you. You looked at him from further down the table and nodded at him with a appreciated smile.
James heart skipped a beat and he dreamed of you that night.
So what else could he do for you that would make you happy, he wondered while he wandered around the castle. The marauders were hanging out with you right now, leaving James to his own devices.
“Books!” He yelled out loud and it startled a cat. “Signed books had been successful, right? But what books, and how to…” He muttered to himself.
You stared at the pile of books that started to form next to you while owls flew in and back out again, only to return with more books. When you opened the one on the pile to your left, you saw that it was signed by one of your favorite authors.
Your eyes grew wide and you quickly inspected the signature from up close. Your hands stroked the beautiful hard back cover of the book. First copy.
People all over the great hall were looking at the spectacle  but you just laughed and blew a kiss at the last owl.
You glanced at James because you knew it was him who orchestrated all of this. Only he would know all your favorite authors and books.
James simply offered you a smile and continued eating his food, but he was absolutely beaming inside at the gleeful look on your face.
You visited him in his dorms that night. “James,” you whispered. You held your finger to your lips as a sign not to wake the others.
“James, thank you for the books, they’re amazing,” you told him. “But James, you’ve got to stop. Don’t fight on my behalf. Don’t spend so much money on me. Please “ you begged him.
James’ smile fell. “I made you uncomfortable,“ he noted. You sighed and sat down on his bed. “I used to give you gifts all the time,” he weakly defended himself.
“I don’t want to forgive you,” you started. James looked down.
“You hurt me. Do you get that? You hurt me and broke our friendship and I don’t know when I’ll want to be friends again, but it’ll never the same when I do. So you have to stop doing all of this. You can’t try to buy it with gifts and heroic deeds.”
“I don’t want it to be the same either,” James sighed out in a defeated tone. “I just need you with me. One way or another. I’m not trying to buy anything, I just want to make you happy.”
You understood his words and the implied confession behind them. After all, you had felt the exact same way months ago.
You sadly smiled and pressed a kiss to his cheek. James closed his eyes at the contact and tried to savor the moment. You really were his greatest regret.
“I don’t want to forgive you,” you stubbornly repeated.
“You don’t have to. I just want to be there.”
“Right behind me, right? No matter what pace?”
“Of course,” he replied.
It took time. Months and months actually, where he respected your boundaries and slowly inserted himself back into your life, with your permission of course.
At first simply joining you with the marauders again. Then thoughtful actions such as giving you his spare quill. Later on even sitting next to you during Transfiguration and building up to study nights and eventually back to star gazing.
However slow it was, everything was worth it, James thought to himself as he opened the door to invite you in for the Easter holiday.
“Hi, thank you for coming over,” he widely smiled.
“Ah you know, I live right across the street, love.”
 
Taglist: Only 50 first people, rest in comments.
@elsie-bells @charlie-weasley-is-underrated @dreamingofmarauders @moonyslibrary98 @wildernessflora @hollandweather @queerqueenlynn @locklyebrainrot @thisrandombitch @grac3aph3lion @earfquak3 @venomsvl @shrekscrustybudassy @middle-of-the-earth @sirene-noir @bettytaylorversion @littlepoisonmushroom @faumpje @iloveutwice @katelebate @moonysupremacy01 @marina468 @fangirl-kimora @bellesowl @badasswlthafatass @sjprongs @armydrcamers @its-a-ittle-bit-cold @ireallywannasleep127 @sayukoi @jsjcue @cashtons-wife @idllyastuff @severegiantjudgefriend @ivy-34 @loudflowerss @moonyunebi @caspianobsessed @laraoverthinks @starsanddream @btsw1fe @larahatesbeinghere @kquil @moonys-luvr @consumingwaters @mindflay3r @magpiesworld
@my-beloved-fandoms @dreamsygirl @papichulo120627 @nokkoongie @sbrewer21 @helloitsmeeeeeee @magical-spit @clumsyassbitch
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mochie85 · 5 months
Text
Blue Christmas
One-Shots Masterlist | Complete Masterlist | Secret Santa Masterlist
Summary: You ask Loki to give you something special for Christmas. A/N: This is a Secret Santa gift for @divine-knight-hand. I wanted to give you everything you requested, my love, but I already wrote something similar a while ago. For the sake of not sounding repetitive, I altered your request just a little bit. I hope you still like it. However, please check out the other story because it checks off all your points! And is Christmas-themed! Mayari: If You Let Me. Also, sorry for the cringy title. I couldn't think of anything else. Pairing: Loki x Female Reader Word Count: Over 2.7k Warnings: Explicit. Smut. P in V. Jotunn Loki (yes, cuz he's a whole warning!)
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You crossed your legs as the last rays of the sun were trickling down on your body. Your book was discarded on the ground as the condensation from your Pina Colada dripped down onto the side table.
Loki had surprised you and whisked you away to the Fiji Islands for Christmas— no more crowded New York streets. No more dirty ice falling onto you from the splash of an oncoming taxicab. And certainly, no more missions and assignments till the New Year.
It had been an exhaustive nineteen-hour flight. Especially since he didn’t tell you anything he was planning. When you came home to your room earlier that day, you were greeted by Loki with two suitcases on either side of him.
“Merry Yuletide, Darling,” he said as he rolled your luggage over to you and kissed you on your lips in greeting.
“Loki- what?”
“No time to explain, we need to leave now in order to catch our flight,” he said ushering you out the door by patting you on the bum. You jumped up with giddiness, planting a lipstick-stained kiss on his cheek. He was always surprising you with little trinkets and excursions.
“Thank you, sir,” you said in a deep voice.
“Ooh, you dangerous nymph. Go on. I need my wits about me till we get on the plane. I can’t have you distracting me.”
“Then, after?” you asked luring him to a sinful promise.
“After,” he promised in the same breathy tone.
That was two days ago. Loki had kept his promise, and then some- inducting you both into the mile-high club several times over.
Now, here you were in a private villa surrounded by an infinity pool that stretched towards the Pacific, watching your godly boyfriend come out of the water. He ran his hands through his hair, combing the droplets from his tresses. Beads fell down the defined lines of his muscles causing you to heat up in the already balmy weather.
The sight of Loki, wet and in nothing but short swim trunks, was enough to make you convulse. You were sure that if Michelangelo had a model for David, it would’ve been Loki. And knowing Loki, you wouldn’t have been surprised if it was him.
He came up to you, lounging on your chair, and shook his wet hair in front of you to tease you. “St-stop!” you laughed as you playfully pushed him before you got completely wet.
“Awe, come on, Darling. I thought you liked me wet?” he charmed as he sat next to you and leaned in for a kiss.
“I have to admit, it is kind of refreshing.” You said as your hands guided themselves around his slick body. “It’s so hot here. I might need something to cool me down,” you tempted.
There was a flash of understanding in his face. Nights of hedonistic pleasure and anticipation of his moods taught you how to read him. If you weren’t so attuned to him- so zealously infatuated with him and his praise over you, you would have missed it. But you didn’t.
“What’s wrong?” you asked.
“Nothing. I just-” he paused for a second, trying to find the right words. “There was a reason why I chose Fiji.”
“You mean, the beautiful waters and sandy beaches weren’t enough of a reason?” you joked.
“It’s in the southern hemisphere. Which means that it’s summer here whilst still cold and winter back home.”
“Why would the season be an issue?”
“Contingency.”
“Contingency, for what?” you asked confused.
“It was about what you wanted for Christmas,” he answered slowly. Confusion still clouding your memory. Little bits and pieces of a long-forgotten conversation nipped at your mind as you tried to piece together what you had asked him to give you.
As if to remind you, Loki raised his hand and cupped your face. As he did so, his fingers turned a beautiful shade of blue. It was fair, yet sharp. It reminded you of the color of blue thistles on a cold afternoon.
As he touched your cheek, a shiver ran down your skin making you shudder for the first time since you arrived. Realization struck you as you remembered the conversation you two had a month ago.
“I think I know what I want for Christmas,” you lured him in. “And what is that, my Darling?” Loki said absentmindedly while looking through his mission briefing. “You." “You already have me,” he scoffed, placing a kiss on your forehead. “I meant…all of you…the other you…” you trailed silently. Loki looked at you bewildered. There were many nights he had dreamt of taking you in his other form, wondering how you would react to him. He’s postponed showing you this long because he was afraid of his feral nature. He would be at the mercy of his urges and base needs. Loki wasn’t quite sure how to ease you into that new situation. Would he be too much for you? Knowing your adventurous spirit, you wouldn’t mind having his beastly side take you. “Why, you little nymph. Now, why would you want to see that side of me, hmm?”
Excitement bubbled up inside you. “Loki, I-” you started, but he quickly put a finger to your lips to quiet you.
“I want this, Darling. And I want it with you. So, if at any point in time, you want to stop, you know our safe word.” You nodded your head enthusiastically and Loki chuckled. “But I should let you know, that…there was a reason why I’ve waited this long to show you. I become somewhat different when I change. Jotunns, in their very nature, are severe. Harsher. They have to be, to live in the climate they do, and survive.”
You sat there, fervently hanging onto every word Loki was saying. “We relied upon each other for strength, for warmth, basic needs…” Loki trailed off, tracing your lower lip with his cold finger.  “You can imagine the creativity we had in finding ways to keep our blood warm and stave off the frigid climate.” You nodded solemnly at his words as if they were gospel.
“If we do this, I need you to be in control. Do you understand me, Darling?” he asked, inching closer to you. You felt a shiver run down your body. You focused on his eyes as his lips weaved a spell for you to follow. “I won’t know how much is too much. How rough is too rough.”
Loki grabbed your hips and sat you on his lap. The sudden move made you yelp into his arms. “Sorry, my dear. You see, I’m already too excited. My body is reacting to you.” He ran his nose up and down your neck. His cold hands encircled your back, caging you on top of him. “I’ve wanted to take you like this for so long.” His hands entwined themselves with your hair and pulled as his lips met yours in a crushing kiss.
You held on tightly, with your legs wrapped around his waist, as Loki stood up and walked both of you to the edge of your bed. When he broke the kiss, you heard him moan before he continued to suck a bruise onto your neck.
You felt his body change. The hairs atop your skin began to stand as the temperature began to drop. The once-sweltering heat that prickled your skin was replaced by the cool tingles of his touch. It surrounded you and enveloped you in a cold caress. You finally understood the need for a warmer climate. With a slight force, he released you from him, falling onto the soft mattress below.
That was when you had your first glimpse of his true self. The beautiful shade of blue you had seen earlier spread throughout his body. His form was somehow sharper, more jagged. Yet still soft and giving. He had markings defined by fine lines and grooves. They traced over his muscles and sinew, highlighting the best parts of himself. You followed them with your eyes as it led your stare down to his protruding cock. Your jaw went slack as you noticed how hard he was for you already.
Loki watched you appraise him. Your wanton eyes grew darker, and your breathing got quicker. His senses picked up every reaction that your body was going through. He was prepared to confront your fear or disgust, but he couldn’t see that in your face. Instead, he saw hunger and need. He could smell your desire growing for him and it made him feral. He wrapped his hands around his shaft, stroking himself to the sight of you, ready and waiting on his bed.
Loki felt ravenous as he knelt over you on top of the sheets. He spread your legs apart, seating himself in between the warmth of your thighs. His heavy cock resting atop your wet cunt. His hands eagerly tore up your swimsuit as they explored and venerated your body. His lip’s sole mission was to mark bruises where his hands had trailed, following the chill of his touch.
“…Loki…”
“Shh, Darling. I won’t hurt you. Unless you want me to,” he winked as he nipped the underside of your breast. Too many emotions. Too many thoughts. They were swirling at the forefront of his mind wanting to be said. His desire for you was overwhelming him.
In this form, he felt more primal. His emotions were stronger and almost frightening, but all he felt was fire. Everywhere. An all-consuming heat that wouldn’t dissipate until he had claimed you. His need for you was never as aggressive as it was right now. If he wasn’t careful, he knew he could easily hurt you. He needed you to be in control.
“Don’t stop,” you begged him.
“And what would you have me do my Darling?” he breathed onto your skin. “Tell me, and I will comply.” Loki was giving you the green light. The authority to take over because he wasn’t sure if he could be gentle enough not to harm you.
Oh, but the fire. The fire inside him wouldn’t relent. “Shall I force my cock down your throat till you gag for me to stop?” he suggested with a grin. You bit your lip and moaned as the image took hold in your mind. You moved your hips involuntarily, rubbing against his hefty shaft.
“Maybe I’ll edge you for the rest of our stay. Keep you here tied to our bed, my little slave, until I’ve properly bred you.” Loki seized your lips and held you down on the bed. His cold hands capture your wrist in an icy grip.
“S’cold,” you gritted.
“You can take it. You don’t mind a little bit of frostbite. Don’t you, my love?” He ground his hips as he bit into the soft flesh of your shoulder, leaving teeth marks in their wake. You felt his hard cock rub against your sensitive nub. It elicited the most erotic noise from your lips. Loki fought to keep his composure. With every moan you made, it got harder and harder for him to control his urges.
“I thought this was supposed to be my Christmas present,” you sighed, regaining some form of authority and clarity. You intertwined your fingers with his and signaled him to turn over with your hip. You pushed his shoulders down onto the bed as you straddled his waist.
Loki looked up at you in all your glory. Your beautiful face shining down with love and adoration was enough to heal the worry and anxiety he was feeling. “I want to admire my present,” you pouted as your eyes took all of him in.
His mischievous smile broke through as he raised his arms and placed his hands behind his head. “As you wish,” he hissed as the corded muscles in his biceps swelled.
You traced his beautiful blue markings down from his arms to his pecs. “You’re beautiful,” you whispered absent-mindedly, getting lost in the exploration of his body. Loki blushed at your words. He had never heard that word describe his Jotunn form before and it ignited a warm glow inside of him. Different than the fire, but still heated.
You leaned over him as your study led you to his neck and handsome face. You traced his dark lips as he opened them. His bright ruby eyes concentrated on you. “I love my present,” you whispered before you gently kissed him. “Thank you.”
Loki deepened the kiss, his tongue invading yours, as he wrapped his arms around you once again. His cold touch left a trail of goosebumps as he squeezed and grabbed your ass. He raised you slightly with one hand. And with the other, he guided himself into your entrance. The slick of your arousal coating the tip of his hard cock. “Are you ready for me?” he grunted. You nodded your head, keeping your lips on his, not wanting to break contact.
He thrust deep into your body. His heels held on against the mattress of the bed. He held your hips stable as he continued to drive upwards slowly- savoring how snug you were around him.  Every pull of your tight pussy made him moan your name. “…yes…”  he whined.
You sat up, holding onto his shoulders for support. “I need you, Loki,” you pleaded. Your nails dug into his dark skin as your hips took over his strokes. “…deeper…faster…”
“Take me then, Darling. Use me.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He wanted to do this for you. To be good for you. With each push of your hips, he unraveled each time. Crowning to a tight knot in his abdomen.
You waited patiently for him to open his eyes and see the love and pride you had for him. When he did, you were met with an intense sparkle of carmine. Desire and vulnerability shone through, swirling in his gaze. His brows furrowed with pleasure as he bit his lip. “…oh, fuck…” he cried.
You moved faster. Your swollen clit rubbed against his dark curls adding to the already heightened pleasure you were building. You took his hands from your hips and guided them up your body. You placed them over your bouncing tits and he squeezed- rubbing your hardened nipple with his thumb.
“That’s my good little whore,” he gasped. “You like it rough don’t you?” You squeezed tighter around him in answer and Loki couldn’t stop the wolfish grin on his face.
He swallowed thickly watching you enjoy his touch. “Loki” you screamed. The only indication that you had reached your climax and was about to topple over. You trembled over his body screaming his name over and over as you came down from your bliss.
“Don’t stop, Darling.” He pushed harder into you. “Ride me,” he commanded. Loki watched as you clenched around his hard cock- disappearing into your wet folds. The sight was enough to make him tremble.
God, he was so much bigger in this form. You had to push hard to meet the hilt of his shaft. You raised your hips and dipped back down eliciting the deepest groan fleeing his lips. “That’s a good girl,” he whispered. “Fuckin’ good girl.” His head tilted back and the desire to claim you came back. He had to take you faster. Harder.
He dug his heels back into the mattress and slammed his hips upwards. The gasping air leaving your lungs, the wicked moans filling his ears. All of it coerced him to cum inside you- finally releasing his pent-up yearning. Loki couldn’t stop the moans or praises leaving his lips. Your name peppered in with teasing curses and praises.  “You always know how to make me feel good, don’t you, pet?” he prized as he took a deep breath to steady his exhaustion.
“Mmm, yes sir.” You kissed him ardently, taking his breath away from his already spent lungs. You trailed your kisses down to his neck and onto his panting chest. Each kiss made your lips tingle and chilly.
“We should probably get ready for dinner. What say you, my love?”
“Hmm? Maybe in a while…I’m not done playing with my Christmas gift yet.” You responded as your lips traveled further down towards his already hardening cock.
Loki smiled as he closed his eyes, savoring the feel of your warm tongue on his cool skin. “In a while,” he repeated. “Fuck…in a while.”
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🏷️ @emarich7 @michelleleewise @coldnique @psychospore @lokisgoodgirl @silverfire475 @fictive-sl0th @springdandelixn @wheredafandomat @goldencherriess @peaches1958 @salempoe @thomase1 @kkdvkyya @a-witch-with-words @mischief2sarawr @sarawr-reads @vbecker10 @peachymallow @irishhappiness @cakesandtom @simplyholl @here4thefanfics @tallseaweed @holdmytesseract @immersed-in-mischief @joyful-enchantress @lokisninerealms @kikster606 @glitterylokislut @loz-3 @slytherclaw1227 @chantsdemarins @the-lady-amphitrite @eleniblue @km-ffluv @lokidokieokie @n3rdybirdee @melsunshine @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokischambermaid @cjand10 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @chrisevansmaindish ++
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sooniebby · 9 months
Text
Man… I’ve been thinking again.. it’s horny thoughts again.. it’s been about a magic dildo—it’s weird but lemme explain!!! Bottom male reader! Enjoy~
A smut fic were reader moves in with some random dude in an apartment. They have a regular roommate relationship for the most part..
Until when you find a dildo stashed in a box in the laundry room. It’s never been there before… Hm, it can’t belong to your roommate.. you’ve heard his.. night stands.. he’s not the one screaming
And you might’ve.. accidentally seen him fucking one of his friends before…
Yeah, he wouldn’t use this dildo.. but you could be wrong. Reader noticed though that the dildo couldn’t have been used ever since there was still plastic around it.
It even had a tag. Ah, this was store bought? A gag gift..? Your roommates birthday was five days ago. Well, if your roommate wasn’t going to use it, might as well… use it yourself?
A bit weird but you’re curious. The dildo is thick.. very thick and a bit long. Curiosity just got the best of you. So one night when you knew your roommate wasn’t home and decided to use the dildo.
It takes a few tries but you’re able to get the dildo inside your ass. It’s a nice stretch, pretty good actually. It’s long enough to easily graze over your prostate. Fuck, if your roommate didn’t want this dildo you’re going to keep for yourself.
You spend the next few minutes just fucking yourself. Moans load and unabashedly with the house being empty (besides your roommates cat)
You couldn’t help your thoughts slowly drift off onto your roommate.. that one time you saw just a glimspe of his cock fucking another man’s ass. His slim but toned frame, long fingers, his bangs that stuck to his forehead while he sweats .
His name just kept rolling off your tongue by now. Your hand holding the dildo that blessed your prostate and insides going faster. You began to lightly thrust back into it—just wishing it was a real cock. It was so hard to control the speed while you continued to lose yourself
But it seemed you weren’t even controlling it anymore. The dildo was just going by itself, but not like a vibrator. It was actually thrusting inside you, reaching your prostate easily. It felt like a real cock.. like someone was actually fucking you right now.
You cried out at the new sudden harsh thrusting but you were way too close to your release to even care that this dildo had a mind of its own.
You came with a shout, soaking the bed sheets beneath you as you sighed in relief. Fuck, you were keeping this dildo. But.. it was still moving?!
Before you could even scream out in horror at whatever the fuck this dildo actually was, your bedroom door slammed open.. and there was your roommate.. looking.. less human than before..?
“You finally found it? What took you so fucking long?”
Apparently your roommate was an incubus.. and the dildo was magically connected to his own dick.. huh, that’s why it moved like a real cock.
Well, you certainly didn’t get any sleep for that night.. or the later nights after that :)
Went off the deep end lol, I do so well with these types of stories.. kinda wanna do more for incubus roommate tho.. it’s interesting~
Tag list: @kiiyoooo @nakedtoasterr @the-ultimate-librarian @chill-guy-but-cooler @mello-life69 @iwishtobeacrow
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sluttywoozi · 2 months
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Golden Hour | husband!joshua x reader
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After a long day of surf and sun, Joshua somehow still has the energy to fuck you into the hotel mattress. Being in love (and obsessed) with his wife always pays off.
Rating: M (18+) | WC: ~4.4k | Pairing: hjs x reader | Genre: smut
Part of the Husband Joshua series! Can be read as a standalone
Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V
Warnings: idk how to surf so if this is wrong blame wikihow, possessive!josh, drink mention but it doesn’t have to be alcoholic, oral r. rec., spitting, some spanking, fingering, piv sex, breeding kink but they don't want kids, creampie(s), cockwarming
Reader Notes: has breasts and a vagina, on some form of birth control, referred to as a wife, wears a bikini (every body is a bikini body), wears a dress
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Joshua raises a hand to his face, holding it above his eyes to block the glaring sun as he scans the crowded shore for you. He’s been out in the water for a while, trying to improve his surfing skills and also perhaps trying to impress you, just a little. Neither you nor him have been to the beach since your honeymoon, and he doesn’t want you to think those lessons he splurged on while you were having a spa day were for nothing. 
He’s caught a few waves so far but hasn’t made it close enough to the shore to see your face, so he has no idea if you’ve been watching him or if you’ve just been reading and listening to music. He won’t be hurt if you haven’t had your eyes on him, but he does want you to see him ride at least one wave. 
He hears some murmurs from the few other surfers in front of him and turns around, instantly seeing what has them talking. There’s a big one coming in, building and building and building, and if he starts paddling now, he just might make it. 
So he leans forward onto his stomach, his arms powering through the water even as his muscles begin to ache from so much use. The ocean beneath him starts getting sucked in, contributing to the rolling wave, and he prepares himself to pop up and find his balance. 
His heart races as he takes off, getting his feet beneath him and standing on steady legs, his arms loose and his eyes trained on the shore. He rides the wave as far as he can, bailing when it starts to peter out and immediately swimming up to catch his breath. Climbing back onto his board, he looks around for your rented rainbow sun umbrella, grinning when he realizes he’s much closer to it than he thought he’d be. 
You’re not under it though, his smile dropping as he starts to survey the beach, searching for you. He can’t seem to find you, and for some reason that has his heart racing again, this time in anxiety rather than exhilaration. 
“Joshie! That was amazing!” You exclaim from somewhere to the left of him, your voice just a bit faint but still easily recognizable. He whips his head over, his shoulders relaxing as soon as he sets eyes on you, wading waist deep in the clear blue water and making your way toward him. 
He beams and hops off the board, closing the remaining distance and catching you with one arm as you launch yourself at him. The other keeps hold of his board, though he wishes he had both hands free to hug you back. 
He also wishes he could feel your skin against his, but his swim shirt is still in the way and he won’t be able to take it off until you let go of him, which he’s not going to ask you to do any time soon. 
It’s silly but he’s missed you while he was out surfing, even though it’s only been a couple of hours. You’ve been on vacation for three days already and he’s grown used to sharing every minute with you, being in your presence for each breath in and each breath out, bar bathroom breaks and the one nap you took without him when he wanted to explore and you wanted to stay in. 
He wishes it could be like this all the time, but he’ll settle for the rest of the week if only because he knows he’ll have you for the rest of his life. 
Too soon, you pull away, sliding your hands from his shoulders to rest on his chest, your touch appreciative and the slightest bit possessive. His hand on your waist tightens, his fingers digging into the soft flesh exposed by your bikini. You let him pick out your swimsuit today, and while some men might want to cover their wife up, he’s the opposite. 
He thinks it’s hot that people are looking at you, wanting you, not knowing he’s the only one you’ll ever go home with. They realize when he presses his lips to yours in a claiming kiss, when he lets his hands wander a little, when they notice the matching rings on your left fourth fingers. 
He doesn’t even know if anyone is looking at you now, too busy staring into your eyes to notice anything else, but he feels the urge all the same. You can already tell what he wants, leaning in to meet him in the middle as he kisses you deeply, slowly, sucking at your bottom lip and sliding his tongue into your mouth when it opens on a gasp. 
His hand slips down to your ass, squeezing it over your swimsuit hard, pulling your cheek up and over, surely tugging at your pussy too. You squirm against his chest, pressing closer to him as your fingernails dig into his pecs. 
He remembers you’re at a public beach when a wave crashes into you, and thank goodness it did because he was millimeters away from slipping his hand into your bikini bottoms so he could find out if you’re wet from the water or wet for him. 
He pulls away and laughs, shifting his hand to your lower back and pecking you one last time before breathing, “Should we head back to the room?” 
“Yeah, I think we should. Wanna lay out enough to dry off first?” You offer hopefully, and while he kind of just wants to throw you over his shoulder and haul you to the hotel now, he knows you hate tracking water through the clean lobby. 
“Sure, baby, we can do that,” he smiles fondly, giving you one last squeeze and releasing you. His board goes under one arm and you go under the other, your hand coming up to hold his as you walk back to the shore together. 
He splits off from you to return the board to the surf shack, promising he’ll bring back one of those coconut drinks for you to share though he knows you’ll likely have most of it. 
The line isn’t too long for the return of the board or the purchase of the coconut drink, thankfully, and he walks back to you with care, not wanting to spill even a drop. 
You’re on your stomach to the side of the umbrella when he arrives, not under its shade but close enough that it’s obviously yours, a thick terry cloth blanket spread out under you with just enough room for his body too. He sighs contentedly as he sits next to you, handing over the drink and smiling as your eyes widen with glee, your lips pursing around the straw to take an excited sip. 
He reaches for the hem of his surf shirt and yanks it off, wringing it out away from the blanket and laying it flat on the edge of the lounge you no longer occupy. You roll over to lay on your back and he feels your eyes on him like a physical touch, your gaze hot and familiar on his chest and stomach. 
He loves how you look at him, loves that you’d rather stare at him than at the beautiful beach around you, loves even more that you’re obsessed with his body just like he’s obsessed with yours. 
He also loves that this way, he can look at you too. You shift up onto your elbows, your breasts jiggling with the movement, and he feels a bolt of desire shoot straight down his spine as he lets his eyes lovingly travel over every available inch of you. Over your soft tummy and your squeezable hips and your perfect, perfect thighs. Thighs he wants to suffocate between. Thighs he wants to sink his teeth into. Thighs he wants to hold down to the bed as he-
“I think I’m dry enough. Are you?” 
He clears his throat and attempts to clear his head, but images of you still swim through his thoughts, even as he nods and tugs at his board shorts to subtly adjust himself. They don’t feel as wet between his fingers, just damp, and when he reaches for his shirt, it’s close enough to dry that he only cringes a little as he pulls it back on. 
You pack up together quickly, and Joshua is almost relieved when you reach for your dress and tug it over your head, needing a reprieve from your near naked body. He’s less relieved when he remembers that it’s a fucking sundress. 
Of course it is, that’s all you’ve been wearing on this trip, and he doesn’t know how he forgot. This is worse, because it’s his favorite article of clothing on you, and because he knows all you’ve got on under it is an easily untied, flimsy little bikini. 
It takes everything in him not to pull you into one of the changing cabanas, bend you over, and make you scream for him; he manages somehow, the knowledge that he can do the latter two when you get into the room tiding him over, but only just. 
He’s silent while you return the umbrella, his hand tight around yours as you walk through the lobby, and he’s glad you know him well enough to understand that he’s not upset or annoyed, just nearly out of his mind with desire for you. 
The wait for the elevator feels like eons, especially when he looks at you in the reflection of the metal doors, your form slightly fuzzy but clear enough for him to see the rise of your tits under your dress and the way the hem flutters gently over your thighs. Those thighs…
The doors part with a ding and you pull him inside, pressing the button for your floor before the elevator fills with other guests, leaving you and Joshua at the back. You’ll have to maneuver in between them to get out but it means he can slide his hand up your dress and squeeze your ass again, his fingers slipping under your bikini to touch your bare skin. 
They creep closer to the heat between your legs with every stop, and he’s just about to reach your pussy when the elevator lands on your floor. He reluctantly takes his hand back and rights your dress, murmuring, “Excuse us,” as he weaves around the few people left. When the doors close behind you, he twines his fingers with yours and breaks into a jog, tugging you to the room and grinning as a few bitten back giggles escape you. 
He bounces on his toes as you dig the card out of your bag, your trembling fingers inserting it into the lock and his hand turning the handle as soon as the light glows green. He pushes the door open for you, following closely with his other hand tight on your hip, his dick already hard and throbbing in anticipation. 
You’ve barely set your bag down before he’s steering you to the bed, crowding you up against the edge, and pressing your shoulder to bend you over. He flips up the hem of your dress and tears down your bikini, knocking your legs apart with his own and pushing his left knee up until yours rests on the bed. He’s sure you expect him to drop his shorts and sink right into you, which is probably why you gasp when he falls to his knees and slaps your ass with both hands before spreading your cheeks apart and shoving his tongue inside of you. 
You taste fucking divine, the beloved flavor of your pussy tinged with salty seawater, and he groans deeply into you, fucking his tongue in and out of your entrance and swallowing as his mouth fills with saliva and your arousal. 
He fucks you with his tongue until you’re whining and shaking above him, tilting your hips to improve the angle and rocking into his movements. The leg keeping you up starts to quiver, and he pulls away just long enough to gasp out, “On the bed, baby, get on the bed.”
You listen, clumsily climbing up and stretching out for him, face down, ass up, just like he likes you. He smacks your ass again just because he can before spreading your pussy open with his thumbs and spitting on your clenching entrance. Some of it seeps inside of you and some of it trails down to your clit, leaving the bud glistening and just begging for his attention. 
He leans down and wraps his lips around it, sucking in hard, quick pulses until you cry out, “Joshie, please!”
“Please what, baby? Tell me what you want,” he mumbles into you, just loud enough for you to hear. 
“Your fingers, I want your fingers,” you whimper into the pillow, arching your back and pressing further into him in wanton need. 
He licks his lips to get one last taste of you and slides two digits deep inside, giving you no time to adjust to the intrusion before pulling them out to the tip and sinking them back in. His pace rockets up, his tired muscles hard at work as he fucks you with his fingers, the wet sound of your pussy accepting them filling the air. 
He wants to hear your voice too, slowing down and leaning over you to slide his fingers beneath your cheek and turn your head to the side so you’re no longer muffled by the pillow. Your gaze catches his and he smiles tenderly at you, pressing a kiss to your temple before returning to his previous position and hooking his fingertips into your g-spot, grinding harshly into it. 
Predictably, you yelp, your eyes squeezing shut as he focuses on massaging that sensitive patch, his breath catching as he feels you get wetter around his fingers. You’re moaning now, your brows scrunched with pleasure and your mouth stuck open, and he reaches his free hand up to tap at your bottom lip with two fingers, sliding them into your mouth when you open wider for him. 
You suction around them immediately, your tongue laving over his knuckles and bathing his fingers in saliva, and he feels his cock throb in his shorts in response, the memory of your perfect lips around it visceral and precious. He yanks his fingers back before he can get too distracted, reaching around you to sandwich your clit between them. 
He starts fucking you with his other hand again, your hips jerking with it, stimulating your clit as he curls his fingertips towards your stomach, tapping your sweet spot with every thrust. It’s not long before you’re gasping out his name and clenching down, your thighs juddering as you fight to hold yourself up through the pleasure. 
He doesn’t stop, pinching your clit harder and digging his fingers into you, scissoring them to stretch you out for another. A third squeezes in beside the first two, making you whine and claw at the duvet, your cunt contracting and trying to suck his fingers in deeper when he pulls them out. 
“Fuck,” he groans, releasing your clit to press down on your back and deepen the arch, making it even easier for him to hit your g-spot. He wants to be inside of you, desperately, but he wants to make you cum again first, wants you to be so wet, he can just glide right in. 
You’re getting close, he can tell by the way you’re pushing back into his thrusts and sobbing, and he doesn’t know what possesses him to say it, but it just feels so fucking right that he can’t stop the words from coming out.
“Cum for me and I’ll breed you full.” 
You suck in a sharp gasp and bear down, your pussy rippling and leaking and fever hot as you break apart beneath him, your arousal soaking his hand and dripping down his wrist. It seems like it lasts forever, though he’s sure it helps that he’s still fucking his fingers into your g-spot as much as your tightness will allow. 
He knows you’re done when you whimper brokenly and pull away from his touch, your hand reaching back to hold his wrist in place so he doesn’t follow you. He decides to let you catch your breath, sliding off the bed to shed his shorts and wipe his hand off on a towel, bringing it with him so he can spread it out under you like he should have done before. 
You’re on your side when he returns, and he climbs back onto the mattress before carefully tugging at your shoulder and hip, pulling you to rest on your back and waiting for you to look at him. 
When your eyes blink open, they’re teary and dazed, and you watch as he gathers a couple pillows, weakly lifting your hips just enough for him to slide them under you and lay the towel out on top of them. He’s gentle as he sets his hands on the backs of your knees and pushes your legs up, the angle making it easier for you to keep them tucked to your chest when your hands replace his. 
He can tell your head is full of clouds by the way you gaze at him, and he attempts to bring you some clarity by asking, “Remember what I said before?” 
You think for a second, your lips pouting as you try to recall, and he can’t resist leaning down over you and pressing his mouth to yours, his teeth nipping at your bottom lip before he soothes the sting with his tongue. 
When he pulls away, it seems to come to you, and your eyes clear up just a bit as you respond, “You said you’d breed me full if I came for you.” 
“Good, baby, that’s right. So what do you think I’m going to do now?” He asks, sitting back up on his knees and shuffling closer to lay his aching cock on your wet pussy, just barely grinding against you. 
“You’re gonna-,” you take in a halting breath. “You’re gonna breed me?” 
“Yeah, honey,” he nods with a hungry smirk, shifting his hips back enough to line himself up before pressing forward a few inches and popping the head of his cock inside of you. “I’m gonna fuck you full of my cum, until it’s dripping out of you. And then I’m gonna fuck it back in, and fill you up even more. Until it takes.” 
You whimper from deep in your throat, pressing your lips together and readjusting your grip on your legs, your eyes darting down to stare yearningly at his cock. 
“Do you want that?” He whispers, working himself in as slowly as he can manage, teasing both you and himself. 
You just nod, but he wants to hear you say it, needs to hear it from your own lips. 
“Tell me then.”
“I- I want you to fill me up with your cum, fuck a baby into me, please.” 
He sinks the rest of his cock inside of you, covering your hands with his and spreading your legs wider, pushing them into your chest and resting his weight on them as he draws back and snaps forward. 
He’s not gentle now, and he’s definitely not slow, his hips smacking into your ass as he thrusts forcefully into you, his grunts of exertion soon joining the cries escaping you. You’re staring up at him with stars in your eyes, your fingers tight on your thighs beneath his and your pussy fucking flawless around him, and he’s never been so in love. 
That’s a thought he has constantly but he means it every single time, his devotion to you endless and all consuming. 
His appetite for you is voracious enough to rival it; the need, the sheer greed that he feels when it comes to you stripping him down to his basest desires. He’s only human in the end, and nothing could be more human than the urge to love you, to fuck you, to breed you, to keep you. He knows you’re his already but beyond that ring on your finger, there’s one other thing that could show the world you belong to each other, and that includes pumping you so full of his cum, it sticks. 
He’s getting close already just thinking about it, and the way you’re clenching and fluttering around him doesn’t help in the slightest. He wouldn’t mind breaking this early though, not when it means he can just get hard again and fuck his cum even deeper into you. 
“Joshie,” you whine in the voice that means you’re inches away from the edge, and he feels his body respond, his heavy balls drawing up tight and his cock hardening further within you. 
“Cum whenever you want, baby. I’m not stopping anytime soon,” he vows darkly, fully intent on keeping you in this bed and on his dick for the rest of the day. Maybe for the rest of his life. 
You shudder at his words, gasping when he shifts his hips and changes the angle, the head of his cock now bullying right into your g-spot. He can’t hit as deep like this but he knows it’ll be enough to unravel you, and that’s exactly what he wants. 
He grins wickedly when you start to ripple around him, knowing the waves of your orgasm are beginning to overtake you, and when it’s at its peak, he sinks in deep and lets you carry him with you. He groans roughly at the feeling of your undulating walls milking his cock, relief and bone deep satisfaction filling him as he fills you. 
He doesn’t stop, doesn’t even slow down, fucking you through the sensitivity and burying his cum deeper inside of you. You buck against him in overstimulation, crying out his name with tears in your voice, and he feels his cock twitch and get harder, your pussy like a molten velvet vise around him. 
An hour and two more loads pass by in a blur, every minute melting into the next as he ruts into you, barely pulling back enough to get any friction but grinding into your sweet spot to keep you pliant. He thinks he might’ve fucked you dumb, no words escaping your parted lips and no thoughts behind your glassy eyes. You’re still holding your legs up though, and that’s how he knows you’re present enough to hear him. 
“Said I would fuck you full, didn’t I, baby?” He laughs breathily, his eyes trained on the sight of his cock thrusting into you, the combination of your arousal and his cum seeping out around him in bursts. “I think you’re pretty fucking full.”
You mumble something but he doesn’t catch it, and he shifts your legs onto his arms and leans down, bracing his hands on the bed to hold himself up. “What was that, honey?”
“Not enough,” you gasp out, releasing your thighs to wrap your arms around his neck. “It’s not enough, Joshie, I want more.”
Your words blend together but he hears them all the same, and a jolt of desire surges through him, traveling down his spine and ending in his cock. He gets his legs under him, trapping you in a mating press so he can put more power behind his hips as his strokes get deeper, longer, your fingernails digging into his neck with every thrust of his aching dick. 
“I can give you one more, baby, I’ll give you whatever- whatever you want,” he groans raggedly, his vision blurring and his hips stuttering as he nears the edge for what he fears may be the last time. You clench and squeeze and flutter around him, whimpering, “Please, Joshie, breed me,” and that’s it for him. 
This time when he cums, it’s enough to steal his voice, his breath, his thoughts. It’s blinding, the pleasure, but that just means he feels everything. He feels you falling to pieces on his cock, he feels the warmth of the sunset on his back, he feels his heart racing in his chest. He feels his cum filling you again, replacing what he’s fucked out, and more than anything, he feels satiated, like there’s nothing left to give and nothing left to take. 
He all but collapses into you, shifting to rest his knees on the bed and dropping your legs from his arms, his face buried in your neck as he trembles and gasps for air. Your cunt is still hugging him tightly, and he winces at the sensitivity of his spent cock but doesn’t pull out, can’t pull out, not when he knows that all of his hard work will go to waste as soon as he does. 
You run gentle fingers through his salty hair, your chest slowly rising and falling against his, and his body starts to grow heavy, exhaustion weighing him down and the comfort of your pussy keeping him warm. 
He’s asleep before the golden light of the sun fades from the sky. 
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“Joshua, with everything we said, I have to ask… Have you changed your mind about kids?” You ask softly, your back to his chest and your body between his legs as you laze in the massive hotel bath together. 
He presses his lips to your neck and thinks, only for a second, before responding, “No, I’m happy with our life. I don’t need anything but you.”
You let out a sigh of relief and turn in his arms, resting your cheek on his shoulder and tucking your legs up, your knees just barely out of the water. He scoops some up and pours it over you, not wanting you to get cold. 
“Good, I feel the same way.”
“Love you,” he murmurs into your hair, kissing your crown and rubbing his hand up and down your back. 
“I love you,” you whisper in return. “The breeding kink was hot though, let’s keep that?” 
“Oh yeah, baby, for sure.”
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AN: for @thatgirlfromwindsor and these anons 💖
Seventeen Masterlist
Main Masterlist
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smileysuh · 2 months
Text
heart aches
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🌙 starring. Jeong Jaehyun x afab!Reader
🔮 preview. Your ex finds your sweet spot as easily as ever, as if it hasn’t been two years since his tongue stroked this specific patch of skin and made your whole body tingle with pleasure. You let out a shaky sigh, threading your fingers through his hair and relaxing against the pillows. “Don’t leave me again,” you whisper. “Never again,” he promises.
tw/cw. foreplay, fingering, mutual masturbation, hand job hand fucking, spitting, finger sucking, inklings of oral fixation, praise, dirty talk, pining, reminiscing, breast worship, teasing, Jae being a simp, unprotected sex, handholding while fucking, Jae is pretty vanilla but pent up as hell, etc… I pet names: (hers) baby.
👹 rating.18+ explicit I wc. 5.3k
🍭 aus. ex's to lovers, non idol au, etc…
☀️ mlist + an. I don't normally do angst, but Idk, this felt right for some reason this month
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Prologue:
“What’s wrong?” Jaehyun asks, watching you fiddle around the bedroom while he cuddles with your cat on the bed. 
Part of you wants to push back your feelings - you’d kind of been hoping to talk to him at the airport in the morning - but you should have known Jaehyun would realize something is up with you. It’s been a nice long weekend having him home with you.
It’s almost been like he never left.
Almost.
With a deep sigh, you go to sit on the foot of your mattress, staring down at your hands. “I can’t do this anymore,” you say quietly.
The room feels achingly silent, and then the comforter ruffles as Jaehyun sits up. “This?” he asks. 
“Us.” The word hurts to even say. “The distance… I mean, I knew continuing our relationship while you’re in a different city at a new university doing your graduate program would be rough… but… I just didn’t know I’d ever feel this lonely.”
Tears are welling in your eyes. You don’t want to break up with Jaehyun- he’s had your heart for four years. Starting over with someone new sounds impossible- but at the same time, being away from him hurts more than you could ever have imagined. It hurts when he calls you every night, being the perfect boyfriend, smiling and telling you about his day. It hurts because you thought you’d go through life together- you thought you’d be there to see it all yourself, not hear about it after the fact on the phone.
“Come here,” Jaehyun says softly, moving your cat off his lap so he can open his arms to you.
You allow Jaehyun to pull you into an embrace, his fingers stroking your hair. His heart is thundering in his ribcage, and you can hear it as you cuddle closer.
“I’m sorry that it came to this,” he breathes, “but I understand.”
You can’t help the tears now, and a choked sob escapes you. You grab at the front of his soft hoodie, wanting to crush the emblem of his new school. Part of you wishes he’d never been accepted into the elite business graduate program, but another part knows that Jaehyun deserves to be where he is now.
You love him, more than you’ve ever loved anyone, and that’s what makes this so painful.
Jaehyun needs to focus on his studies, to build a new life for himself across the country- and you need to do the same. You can’t be a ghost anymore, walking through life like a zombie and waiting to hear from him, constantly checking the time zone differences and calculating what he’s doing based on schedules.
“I can still…” you rub at your eyes, swallowing thickly, “I’ll take you to the airport in the morning-”
“It’s okay, baby,” Jaehyun shushes you gently, kissing the crown of your head. “I can get a cab.”
“Are you angry at me?” you ask, pulling away from his chest to look up at his face, worried about what you might find there.
“Of course not,” Jaehyun assures you, immediately stroking a thumb across your cheek to wipe away your tears. “No matter how much I didn’t want to admit it, I knew things had changed when I moved away. I could see that the distance was a problem. You have needs, and I’m proud of you for voicing them, even if it hurts.”
“My heart is breaking,” you whimper.
Jaehyun frowns. “Mine too.”
“You’re really not mad at me?”
“I could never be mad at you,” Jaehyun promises. “I think it will be easier to talk about this with time, if that’s something you’d be interested in. But for now, how do you feel about just laying down, holding each other, and doing our best to enjoy tonight- if it’s going to be our last.”
It might be easier if he was mad at you, if he yelled and swore and tried to make you change your mind- but Jaehyun’s never been an abusive type. Instead, he holds you close, and as you softly cry on his chest, you begin to drift off to sleep.
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One
Even in a crowded bar, one distant laugh makes your blood run cold. You grip your drink, heart thundering in your rib cage as you scan your surrounding area.
It’s been two years since you broke up with Jaehyun. Even so, you’d recognize his voice anywhere.
“You good?” your best friend asks, reading your change in expression.
“Yeah, I just thought I heard-” as you’re about to say his name, you spot Jaehyun. He’s leaning against the bar top, chatting with a man whose back is to you.
God, he still looks so good. 
Your chest aches, throat going dry. As you watch him, his eyes move to take in the bar. You’re quick to shift your gaze, lifting your drink to your lips to down the rest of it. 
“I need to get out of here,” you mutter.
“What? Why?” Your friend reaches for your arm, pulling you closer to check in on you.
“My ex is here.”
“Which one?”
“Which one do you think?” You let out a laugh, but there’s no humor in it.
“Fuck.” 
“Yeah. Listen, have fun, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” You hand her your empty glass, giving her one last look before you turn to head to the entrance of the bar. 
You can feel eyes on you as you push through the crowd, but you chalk it up to being paranoid. You slip through the front doors, intent on hailing a taxi. As you make it to the cement sidewalk, you hear your name behind you, and that familiar voice has your blood running cold for a second time tonight.
“Y/N?”
Your whole body freezes, and for a moment, you truly consider running. But you’ve already run from Jaehyun once before, and you don’t have it in yourself to do it again.
With a deep breath, you turn to face your ex, your first love, the man you’ve never recovered from.
“I thought that was you,” Jaehyun mutters quietly, shoving his hands into his pockets as he stares at you.
You don’t even know what to say, so you keep your mouth shut, taking in his pretty face and the broad set of his shoulders. 
“Sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have followed you,” he admits finally. “It doesn’t look like you want to talk.”
Jaehyun turns to head back inside, and your body reacts on its own accord; you grab at his arm, and it makes him stop. He looks down at your hand, wrapped around his forearm, then up at you.
“We…” you swallow thickly, “we can talk. I just… I don’t know what to say.”
“That makes two of us.” 
You drop your hand from his arm when you realize he’s not going anywhere.
“I uh…” Jaehyun clears his throat. “I got back to town a month ago. Meant to message you- but I didn’t know what to say then either.”
“You completed your program?”
“Yup. With flying colors.”
“I guess I always expected you to be a big shot and move to some other city- what are you doing back here?”
“Unfinished business… maybe.” Jaehyun dips his head, looking down at the ground. You watch him absentmindedly kick at an old cigarette butt.
He can’t be talking about you… can he?
“Anyways,” Jaehyun meets your eyes again, “how’ve you been?”
“I’ve been…” you search for the right word, “okay.” 
“Yeah? Happy?”
“Sort of. You?”
Jaehyun shrugs, offering you a lopsided smile that makes your heart ache. “Sort of. It was two years of studying. Didn’t have much time for extracurriculars, as you know.”
So your breakup is still a sore spot for him, you can sense it in his words. He’s not outwardly saying it, but… it’s there all the same. There’s something of an apology in his statement, because you do know how hard it was for him to find time for things outside of school- it had been the main reason you’d had to call things off with him.
“How about you?” he presses. “Any uh… any protective boyfriend who’s about to show up and beat my ass?”
You can’t believe he’s asking you outright about this, and the question actually makes you let out a small laugh. You shake your head. “No. No boyfriend.”
“Good. I mean… I hoped you were happy, but uh, you know, it’s nice to hear that, well, you know what I mean.” Jaehyun looks down again, and you can see his ears turning red.
It’s as clear as day that Jaehyun still cares about you. The way he’s acting tells you everything you need to know… well, almost everything.
“So…” you wrap your arms around yourself, “are you planning on leaving again? Do you know how long you’ll be in town?”
“Nothing is set in stone,” Jaehyun admits, cocking his head to the side as he looks at you. “Listen, I’m just going to say it.” He takes a deep breath, meanwhile, you can’t even breathe. “I never got over you. I mean, how could I? You’re everything, and- I understand why we broke up, I really do. But my program is over now, and if you give me another chance, I promise not to go anywhere ever again, at least, not without you right there by my side.”
“Jaehyun-”
“If you need some time to think about it, I totally get that-”
Jaehyun goes to take a step back, and you find yourself grabbing at him once more. Your body simply can’t let him go- not now, not ever again.
Your ex looks down at your hand on his forearm, and as you open your mouth to give him your response, no words come to mind. Your gaze dips to his lips, and before you know what you’re even doing, you’re moving in to kiss him.
Jaehyun is frozen in place at the initial meeting of your lips, but after a moment, you feel his body relax. His hands gently slip to your waist, tugging you closer as he slants his mouth against your own. You feel him release a small groan, and a whimper bubbles in your chest.
How many times have you dreamt of this moment? How many times have you thought about kissing Jaehyun? 
Your arms wrap around the back of his neck, and you allow yourself to get lost in the feeling of him-
Someone lets out a whistle, and you roughly pull back from Jaehyun, your eyes finding the two bouncers outside the bar, who are staring at you with wolfish grins.
“Is there somewhere we can go to talk?” Jaehyun asks, resting his forehead against your own.
“Come home with me.”
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Two
It feels like deja vu to be walking into your apartment with Jaehyun. You’ve had the same unit for years- and you know it must feel even weirder for your ex to be here again after practically living here with you for half of your time in university together. 
As you toss your keys onto the entryway table, you hear a familiar meow. Your cat slinks in from the kitchen, but instead of heading to you, she immediately moves toward Jaehyun’s feet, letting out an obnoxiously loud purr as she begins to rub against him.
“Looks like Mittens hasn’t forgotten me either,” Jaehyun smiles, immediately bending down to pick up the fluffy grey and white kitty. She leans into his touch, purring like an engine as he scratches he cheeks. Her paws begin to make softies on his arm, and it makes your heart ache.
You’ve dated a few guys casually in Jaehyun’s absence, and Mittens has never liked any of them. She always was a daddy’s girl- after all, you’d started dating Jaehyun only a few months after you’d picked her up from the shelter. 
You still have pictures of the two of them on your phone, hidden in a secret file- you’d never had the heart to delete them, and as you watch their reunion, you’re glad you never did.
“She missed you,” you admit. “We both did.”
You watch Jaehyun’s Adam’s apple bob with effort, your words clearly invoking emotion. You’re quick to look away.
“Can I get you anything?” you ask, kicking off your shoes. “I had a few drinks at the bar, was planning on making a grilled cheese-”
“You still do that?” Jaehyun asks.
“Yeah.” Your throat feels dry admitting another ghost of your past you still haven’t been able to shake. “I still do that.”
Grilled cheese after a night out had always been your thing, and when you’d started dating Jaehyun, it had become his thing too. You can’t even count how many nights the two of you came home from university parties only to make a grilled cheese and collapse on your bed, giggling and kissing like kids in love.
“A grilled cheese sounds perfect,” Jaehyun says. “Thank you.”
He follows you into the kitchen. As you begin to make the late-night snack, you realize Jaehyun has no intention of putting Mittens down. She basks in his attention, letting out upset chirps any time he tries to stop petting her to help you in small ways.
Jaehyun asks you about your job, and from that, the two of you begin to talk about your lives over the past two years. It feels too natural to slip into this type of conversation. His presence is so calming and familiar- by the time you’re done making the grilled cheese for you to share, it’s almost as if the past two years never happened. 
It’s almost as if you never left him.
Almost as if he never left you first.
“Do you want to eat in here?” Jaehyun asks, heading to the small kitchen table.
“We can go to my bedroom,” you say softly. “Unless you wanted to be here.”
“Your bedroom is good.” 
He follows you through your apartment, but when you get to your room, he stops in the doorway.
“I can’t get over how little this place has changed,” he muses, looking at the layout of the space.
“Yeah,” you sit down on your bed, lifting your legs onto the mattress and setting the plate by your knee. “I guess I’m used to it like this.”
Jaehyun knows all too well how comfortable you get, how hard it is for you to make changes. You think it must be one of the reasons he never fought the breakup. If you’d gotten to the point of needing an emotional separation to deal with the physical distance, pushing you to change your mind would have only made things worse.
“Can we come sit with you?” Jaehyun asks.
“Of course.” You gesture to the mattress. “Make yourself at home, Jae.”
With a small chuckle, he comes to join you. He’s careful when he sets Mittens down, and she immediately stretches, letting out a massive yawn before coming to investigate the grilled cheese.
Jaehyun reaches for his half of the sandwich. “I missed these.”
“It’s just a grilled cheese,” you laugh.
“Yeah, but there’s something special about the way you make it. I can’t explain it.”
You can only offer him a smile as you both lift the gooey, cheesy, greasy, crispy bread to your lips. The crunch is satisfying, and Jaehyun shifts the food to his right hand so he can pet Mittens with his left. 
The two of you eat in silence, but there’s nothing uncomfortable about it. As your meal comes to a quick end, your phone begins to ring, and you stand up to answer it. “Give me a sec,” you tell him, exiting the room while Mittens rushes to follow you.
“Hey girl,” your best friend says. “You okay?”
“I’m good.”
“Seeing your ex must have been pretty hard.”
“Actually, uh���” you look toward your open bedroom door, swallowing thickly then lowering your voice, “he’s at my apartment with me.”
“What!?”
“Yeah, we’re talking things out.”
“Just talking?” You can hear the cheeky grin in her voice.
“Don’t be like that,” you laugh.
“Girl, you and that man were a dream couple. He’s the one that got away, and now he’s in your apartment- he’s probably sitting on your bed, eating grilled cheese-”
“God, stop,” you groan. “Am I that predictable?”
“Nah, it was hashtag just couple things. Okay, look, obviously you’re doing good- I was worried you were somewhere crying and drowning yourself in booze. I’ll leave you be. Say hi to him for me.”
“Will do.” You hang up, looking down at Mittens. She’s circling your feet, and with a sigh, you go to refill her food bowl. You’d given her lunch hours ago, and you feel bad that she just watched you down a grilled cheese with nothing for her own little mittens to get a hold of.
Also… your best friend knows you too well. 
Your body is reacting to Jaehyun as if there was never a separation- or maybe, your body is reacting because there was a separation. Your pulse is picking up with each step back to your bedroom, and when you close the door behind you, Jaehyun cocks a brow, finishing his grilled cheese with one last large bite.
“You good?” he asks.
“I’m great,” you tell him, approaching the bed.
“Yeah?” Jaehyun’s gaze moves to the closed door, and he offers you a dimpled grin, mischief flaring on the edges of his expression. “You locked out Mittens.”
Nothing gets past this man. You’ve never loved getting intimate while Mittens is trying to hog Jaehyun’s attention, and you shouldn’t be surprised that he got you figured out the moment you closed the door to your bedroom.
“Don’t even with me, Jae.” You sigh, collapsing onto the mattress next to him while he moves the grilled cheese plate to the side table.
“Look, I don’t want you to feel any pressure just cuz I’m here and we’re sitting on your bed-”
“Does it look like I feel pressure?” you ask, hyper-aware of the way your dress is riding up your thighs.
Jaehyun gives you a slow once-over. “I guess not.”
“You really mean what you said about not going away a second time?” You look down. “Because I don’t think I could take it if we gave this another try and three months down the line you moved cities again.” 
Your ex nods. “I promise. If you give me one more chance, I won’t let you down.”
You stare at Jaehyun for a moment, studying the sincerity on his face. “Okay.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” You open your arms, resting back against the pillows and spreading your legs. “Now come here.”
Jaehyun practically leaps on top of you. He slots between your thighs like he was made to be there, his mouth pressing to your own while you wrap him in a tight embrace. He kisses you like he’s been starved of your lips. 
He retains some of the gentleness that he’d exhibited outside of the club, but there’s a desperation too, you can almost taste it on him… along with the grilled cheese.
The thought makes you smile, and Jaehyun breaks the kiss to look down at you, also grinning. “What?”
“Nothing, just- I’m happy.”
“Me too,” he admits, looking down at your beaming face before he grabs your jaw between his thumb and forefinger, angling your head to the side so he can access your neck. Your ex finds your sweet spot as easily as ever, as if it hasn’t been two years since his tongue stroked this specific patch of skin and made your whole body tingle with pleasure. 
You let out a shaky sigh, threading your fingers through his hair and relaxing against the pillows.
“Don’t leave me again,” you whisper.
“Never again,” he promises, voice husky in your ear.
His hand slides down the curve of your body, grasping at your thighs and slowly pushing your dress up. Your hips move, rutting in an attempt to spur him on. When his fingers finally find your core through your panties, you swear you see stars. He begins to rub your clit, circling it as he applies more and more pressure. 
His mouth continues on your neck, and you begin to whimper from the stimulus.
You’d nearly forgotten how good it feels to be touched by someone who knows you inside and out- by someone who cares about your pleasure more than he’s ever cared about his own.
“Jae,” you whimper, breathing heavily as he rubs your core. 
“Yes, baby?” His lips are gentle along your throat, and the feather-light touch almost teases you more than a rougher one would.
“Can we skip the foreplay? I need you.”
Jaehyun’s fingers stop on your clit, and he pushes himself up on an elbow, looking down at you with a quizzical set to his brow. “Skip the foreplay?” he repeats, letting out a scoff. “Baby, I’ve been thinking about what I’d do to you if you ever gave me a second chance for over two years. We’re not skipping the foreplay.”
“But-”
“Please don’t argue with me. Just let me have this. Just let me enjoy the body I’ve missed so much. I’ve missed your sounds, the way you react to my touch-” his fingers pick up their pace on your clit again, and you let out a whine, pushing toward him again. “See? You’re perfect. No matter how many memories of this I have, nothing compares to the real thing.”
When you’d been dating Jaehyun initially, he was - for lack of a better word - pretty vanilla. This dirty talk is new, and it makes your stomach erupt into butterflies. Your mind goes practically blank, lulled into a lusty trance by the musings of a man who’s clearly bewitched by you, body and soul.
When your gaze dips down to his hand between your thighs, you notice the way his cock is straining in his pants. “Can I…” you swallow thickly, “Can I touch you too?”
“Yeah.” His mouth returns to your throat, and he pushes your panties to the side, dragging his fingers through your soaked folds. “Fuck, baby, you’re so wet for me.”
You mewl at his words, quickly fumbling with the button of his pants so you can push them down just far enough to take his cock out of his briefs. Jaehyun releases a low groan and it makes your pussy flutter as you begin to stroke him.
Your ex reacts by slipping his fingers into your core, two long digits going knuckle deep. He tests your walls, grazing your g-spot when he begins to lazily pump his hand, his palm firmly pressing to your clit.
A whimper of pleasure escapes you, and you can feel Jaehyun grin against your neck. “The prettiest sounds,” he muses. “How did you ever get this pretty?”
It’s a rhetorical question, and it makes you feel cock drunk and dumb, your chest pushing up against his own, looking for stimulus- your nipples are hard in your bralette, but you wish you were naked already, wish you could feel him better-
“Jae?”
“Yes, baby?”
“Can you take my dress off?”
Jaehyun pulls his hand away from your core, bringing his two wet fingers to your lips. He pushes them into your mouth, propping himself up so he can look down at you while you suck his digits clean. “I thought you’d never ask.”
You groan around his fingers, the act of sucking is turning you on more than you’d care to admit, but it ends too quickly as Jaehyun pulls his hand away.
He sits up, taking off his own shirt first. Then he reaches down to grab at the hem of your dress, slowly dragging it up your form. Jaehyun’s eyes take in each strip of newly exposed skin, and you can see the way his pupils have blown with interest.
You lift your shoulders off the bed, making it easier for him to tear the fabric off of you and toss it to the side. This leaves you in your bralette and panties, both of which you’re eager to have join your dress on the floor.
Jaehyun’s hand reaches out to cup your breast, his thumb smoothing over the pebbled nipple that’s pushing through the silky fabric. He squeezes you gently, forcing you to release a moan of pleasure. 
A moment later, he’s removing your panties, then your bra, fingers pinching at your newly exposed nipple.
Your hand, meanwhile, returns to his cock- only for Jaehyun to grab at your wrist, pulling you away.
You’re about to ask what’s wrong, but then Jaehyun turns your hand palm up, and he spits into the center of it, bringing it back to his cock. 
There’s no way that action should have been as sexy as it was- your core throbbing as you begin to stroke his rock-hard length. 
With one last lustful look at your body, Jaehyun settles over top of you again, his mouth seeking out your breasts while you pump his cock. The feeling of his tongue flicking against you has you crying out, pushing your chest toward his mouth. His teeth graze over your sensitive nipple and you respond by applying more pressure to his cock.
Jaehyun groans loudly, rutting his hips into your hand, which stills so you can allow him to fuck your palm. He continues to worship your breasts while his hips do most of the work, and you surrender yourself to the pleasurable scenario you’ve found yourself in.
“You know…” Jaehyun presses another kiss to your nipple, “I was going to ask you to sit on my face, but… it’s hard being this close to your pretty pussy and not just… slipping it in.”
“Yeah?” You guide his cock closer to your core, so that when he ruts his hips, the tip of his cock glides through your soaked folds. “Then just do it.”
“Here I was, saying not to skip the foreplay- but here I am, giving in to you like always.” 
Jaehyun releases a laugh, and it makes you giggle along with him, because it’s true. Jaehyun may have this sexy, devil-may-care attitude, but he’s always been a total simp for you. 
He was completely wrapped around your finger when you first met, and he’s completely wrapped around your finger now. It’s interesting how so much can change, and so little can change at the same time. 
“You just feel so good,” Jaehyun groans, thrusting again, the tip of his pretty pink flushed cock just slipping inside of you- 
“Fuck, Jae, please-” you push your chest up toward his face again, pumping his length, trying to guide him deeper-
He brings his mouth to your own, capturing you in a breathtaking kiss as he sheaths himself into your wet core.
You let out a low whine, wrapping your legs around his hips and releasing his cock in favor of grabbing his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin.
“Fuck-” Jaehyun moans, staying still inside of you while your walls pulse around his shaft. “Missed this perfect pussy, baby.”
“Missed your perfect cock,” you retort, tangling your fingers in his soft hair and drawing him in for another kiss.
His tongue clashes against your own, his hands finding your hips so he can steady himself as he begins to rut into you. 
You love getting lost in him. You can feel your mind slipping away, your body giving into its primal instincts as Jaehyun makes love to you the way he has so many times before.
One of his hands finds your own, taking it from his shoulder and lacing your fingers above you, pressing you into the pillow. He breaks the kiss to look down at you, breathing heavily.
“There’s so much I’ve wanted to say,” Jaehyun admits.
“Then say it,” you urge him, cupping his cheek with your free hand.
He nuzzles against your palm, closing his eyes for a moment while he enjoys your touch. “I’ve missed everything about you. You’ve been on my mind every day for two years.”
Your heart aches.
“It’s more than just the sex, and you know it. I’ve missed holding you,” he squeezes your hand, “missed sleeping next to you. Missed late-night talks and grilled cheese. Missed your laugh and the way your eyes light up when you’re happy. Missed the way you cry at sad parts in movies-”
As he talks, the pace of his thrusts gets faster, and you find it harder and harder not to moan like a whore and interrupt his cute little speech about missing you. 
In fact, it’s hard to even keep your eyes open, but your gaze is caught in his own. Jaehyun’s staring into your soul, baring himself to you like a man who’s brought all his walls down. 
“I love you,” Jaehyun says gruffly, “I’ve never stopped loving you. Not for one single day. It’s you, and it’s always been you.”
Your stomach muscles clench at his admission, orgasm bubbling to the surface fast from the combination of his movements and his words.
“You don’t have to say anything,” he assures you, licking his lips. “Just rub your clit and let me feel your perfect pussy clench around me as you cum, that will be answer enough.”
With a loud whine, you throw your head back against the pillow, threading your free hand between your bodies. The first touch of your fingers on your clit has you throbbing already, and you release a gasp.
“That’s it, baby,” Jaehyun coos, lips finding your throat. “Just like that.”
“Jae-”
“I know, I know you’re close- must be pent up like me, right? We’re both going to cum way too fast, but that’s okay, we have all the time in the world to enjoy each other- the way I’m going to eat your perfect pussy for breakfast tomorrow morning-”
Your core pulses at the thought, and you rub your clit harder.
“Gonna let go for me, right, baby? I’m so close, want you to cum with me.”
“I’m there-” you tell him, shivering as he licks the sweet spot on your throat. ‘Fuck, Jae-”
“You want me to cum inside right? You’re still on the-”
“Cum inside,” you interrupt him. “God, fuck, please- need you to fill me up-”
Jaehyun groans, squeezing your hand again. His lips move from your neck to your mouth, and your tongues clash in a breathless, moan-filled frenzy, your orgasms just out of reach-
One more whimpered “please” out of you has Jaehyun moaning, his high crashing into him. You can feel him filling you up with his cum, and it triggers your own orgasm. A gasp escapes you, your sensitive nipples pressing against his chiseled chest-
You can feel him everywhere. He’s all-consuming. You completely let go, sounds uninhibited, pussy throbbing harder than it has in the past two years. 
Jaehyun fucks you through it, until you’re both sweaty, gasping messes. Then he collapses on top of you, giving your captured hand one last squeeze before adjusting. He rolls off of you just enough to tuck you close to his chest, hand finding your hair and beginning to pet you.
You can hear the racing of his heart as he catches his breath.
As you come down from your high, you feel a welling of emotion bubbling inside of you. You’re shocked when a tear rolls down your cheek, and you’re quick to brush it away. Jaehyun notices the movement and tilts his head to assess you.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” you sniffle. “I’m just…. I’m happy, and I missed you a lot.”
“Baby,” Jaehyun’s fingers draw pretty nothings on your back, “I promise I’m not going anywhere ever again.”
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☀️ mlist + an. Thank you so much for reading! I've been reading a lot of shorter smut fics recently, and after doing such a big kick-off in January, I wanted to try a shorter piece again, and challenge myself with a little angst :)
🍭 support me by. sending a tip here or here - or become a patron to access monthly bonus content and extensions for fics like this one :) find the Patreon teaser below! 
🔮 preview. “Listen, I promised myself I wasn't going to cum in or on you tonight - you know, seeing as you’re my wife tomorrow and I don’t want to disrespect you - but since you’re begging for it,” Jaehyun slips the tip of his cock inside of you, only to pull away, “I guess I can settle for cumming on your ass, but only if we shower together after.”
cw/ tw. Unprotected sex, creampie, pussy eating champ Jae, pussy worship, fingering, 69, blow job, hand job, deep throating, gentle choking, begging, dirty talk, slight cum kink/mentions of exhibitionism,  finger sucking, multiple reader orgasms, etc…   I petnames. (hers) baby. 
👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 3.1k I teaser wc. 200
🌙 starring. Jaehyun x afab!Reader
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bonus
Since you got back with Jaehyun over a year ago, the two of you haven’t been separated for longer than twelve hours, but tomorrow is the day of your wedding, and there are certain traditions about the bride and groom staying apart- so here you are, cuddled on a couch in your hotel room, missing your fiance.
When your phone rings and Jaehyun’s pretty face shows up as the contact on your screen, you fumble over yourself to pause your movie and answer it. “Jae?”
“Hey, baby. What room are you in again?”
You think about it for a moment. You’d never actually told him where you’re staying in the hotel… “Why do you want to know?”
“Maybe I wanna send my fiance flowers before our wedding tomorrow.” 
God, why’s he so charming?
You give him your room number without a second thought, hanging up with an ‘I love you.’ 
Five minutes later, there’s a knock at the door, and you open it to find Jaehyun standing there with a massive dimpled grin on his face, and a vase of flowers in his hands. “Hi, baby.”
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