#casually crying over the fact that they’re besties though

[watermelonsuger]

we’re in agreement that the bestie in question is harry, right?

#like #obviously #casually crying over the fact that they’re besties though #and coming to the final show :’)

[watchyourbluesturngolden]

howard stern

I'M BACK BESTIES!!!!! i'm not totally back to my normal writing, but I finally got through a whole piece! anyways I really liked this and i hope you do too :)

warnings: howard stern being a bitch, talk of weight & body image

word count: 2.1k

"Hello Harry, how are you doing today?"

"I'm well, thank you," Harry answered with a smile. He was on the Howard Stern Show, his first interview since Stevie had been born. He hadn't really wanted to; Howard was kind of a prick. Everyone knew this, but Jeff was convinced this was the right move. He said it would be good for Harry to get back into the swing of things, and no one else was available on short notice. In the end, Harry only agreed because you had pushed him to, reminding him it wouldn't be a very long interview and then he wouldn't have to interact with the abrasive man again for a long time.

"That's good to hear," Howard said. "How have you been these past couple months? Have you been getting anything done?"

"Not much that's music related, honestly," Harry laughed. "I've been busy with family things."

"Yeah, you've kind of been hiding away from the world for a while here, what's that about?"

"Well, as I'm sure you already know, my wonderful wife had a baby recently, so I've been pretty busy... just navigating the world of fatherhood." A smile crept onto his face at the mention of Stevie.

"That's a lot, isn't it? Babies are awful at that age," Howard chuckled.

"Uh- I wouldn't say awful," Harry's smile dropped a little and he sighed internally. He already knew how the rest of this interview would go: thinly veiled insults, questions that were way too personal, and having to pretend he didn't want to get up and walk out of the room. But he knew that wouldn't be a very good look for him, so he gritted his teeth and tried to think of happy things. Specifically, the fact that he would get to go home to his wife and baby in less than two hours. "She's a very sweet baby, we're completely in love with her."

"Yeah, sometimes they're cute, but mostly they just cry and wake you up in the night, don't they?" Howard asked smugly, as if he knew Harry's baby better than Harry did.

"Well, of course she wakes up in the night sometimes. She's hungry, can't blame her for wanting food, can I?" Harry asked, trying to speak lightly and with a smile, but he could feel his patience slipping. He was ready to go home and he was not in the mood to pretend to be happy when this man was clearly insulting his child.

"Sure, I just wish babies could be a bit less annoying when they want something."

Harry nodded, plastering a smile that hopefully looked real on his face.

"So, besides the annoying baby, how's the family? Everybody healthy over there?"

Harry nodded. "Everybody's happy and healthy. A little sleep deprived, of course, but we're managing well, i think. And by we, I mean Y/N. She's truly... just amazing. I have no idea how she does it- she's the one keeping everything together. There's no way I could do any of this without her."

"Yeah, she seems pretty great! I remember though, at first we were all a little uncertain about her. She's not exactly like the other women you have a history with, is she?"

"She's-" Harry started talking, but Howard cut him off.

"I just mean, we were used to seeing you with models and actresses and the like, so it was a bit of a shock to see you with one of us commoners, you know?"

Harry huffed a small laugh, still trying to sound polite. "When you love someone, that's all that matters."

"Right, of course, but don't you get bored sometimes? You stopped going out so much when you got with her, almost like she was keeping you captive or something," He laughed.

"Are you asking me if my wife forced me to stop hanging out with my friends?" Harry squinted at the man.

"No, of course not, but..." He leaned closer with a malicious gleam in his eye, like he was about to hear some big secret. "Did she?"

"No," Harry said firmly. "She did not."

"Okay, okay, if you say so," Howard put his hands up, but then he leaned in again and spoke in an exaggerated whisper. "Blink twice if you need help."

Harry played it off with a laugh, crossing his arms over his chest.

"He's good," Howard laughed loudly. "Anyways, let's move on. Since you two are supposedly so happy-" He paused again, as if he expected Harry to cut it and give some dramatic confession about how terrible his relationship was behind closed doors. Harry only raised his eyebrows, signaling him to continue talking. "Tell us about that. When did you two get married again?"

"Almost 2 years ago," Harry said with a smile. "Our anniversary is coming up, actually, it's in 3 weeks."

"Oh wow, you guys moved fast with the whole kid thing, huh?"

Harry nodded. "We both knew we wanted kids and were ready to have them, so... yeah."

"Yeah, no point wasting time, right? How was Y/N after having the baby- Stevie, right?"

"Yeah, her name is Stevie," Harry smiled. "She was good. Again, she's amazing for going through that. She's- i'm just so lucky to have her."

"Did she bounce back right away?"

"I'm sorry?" Harry's brow furrowed.

"You know, did she get her figure back fast? I know that's a big issue for some women," He laughed again.

"Are you-" All traces of Harry's smile were gone now.

"I just mean, I hope she's working to get rid of the baby weight," Howard said casually, as if his words weren't extremely rude. "Just to make sure she can fit into her old clothes!"

Harry cleared his throat. He knew he had to speak very carefully, since this was something you had been very self conscious about. "Well, the two of us are concerned with the new life she brought into the world, not some old clothes, but she looks as beautiful as ever. The amount of pressure women face to live up to certain standards is disgusting to me, and it's especially bad for new mothers. My wife just went through an incredible process, she grew an entire human being in 9 months, then went through labor and the delivery, and she's being told to worry about her figure? That's wrong."

"Right, right, of course," Howard smiled, but Harry could tell he was annoyed at how he couldn't be tricked into speaking badly about his wife.

"I'm really over the whole thing, honestly," Harry said. "And I'm not even the one going through it."

Howard laughed nervously, seeming to finally take the hint that Harry was uncomfortable and annoyed with the topic. "Let's talk about your latest movie, why don't we?"

Harry was closed off through the rest of the interview; anyone could see that. He laughed less, his arms stayed crossed, and his answers were short. He was professional, but it went no farther than that. There was no more playful joking or easy conversation, just Harry trying to get through the interview as fast as he could. When it finally came to a close after his final song, Harry couldn't pack up fast enough. He made sure to say a polite thanks and goodbye before he hurried out to his car.

He sighed deeply before picking up his phone to call you.

"Hi baby!" your happy voice came from the other end. That was good, he assumed that meant you hadn't listened to the interview yet.

"Hi love," he smiled, his mood already improving just from hearing your voice. "Did you listen to the interview?"

"I have been- I couldn't right at the beginning, Stevie was crying, but I caught the end. Why?"

"Why was she crying?" Harry ignored your question, instantly worrying about his baby.

"Sometimes babies cry for no reason, Harry. She's okay, I promise. Anyways, what's up with the interview?"

Harry sighed. "Just the normal for a Howard Stern interview- he asked some very personal and rude questions. Just prepare for that."

"What else is new?" You laughed. "Are you coming right home?"

"Yeah, unless you need anything?"

"Nope, I think I'm good. See you soon!"

"Love you, bye," Harry said, ending the call and starting the car to begin the drive home.

-----

"I'm home," Harry called, removing his coat as he walked in the door.

"We're in here," you responded, not moving from your spot on the couch where you were nursing Stevie.

Harry walked in, a small smile on his face as he looked at the two of you.

"Hi," He sighed, plopping down on the couch next to you.

"That bad, huh?" You asked, taking in his dejected tone.

He hummed in response, leaning his head on your shoulder. "Those interviews are... always something."

"Yeah, I only caught the end, but you sounded pretty upset. What did he say?"

"He just..." Harry shook his head. "I don't think you should listen to it."

You turned your head to look at him. "Why not?"

"He's just very rude and pushy, as always."

"Yeah, i figured, but I wanted to hear your songs," you argued with a small frown. "Did he say something really bad, or...?"

"He just makes some very impolite comments about you and our family."

"Oh," You nodded lightly. "I think I'll be okay, baby. I appreciate you trying to protect my feelings, but I'm used to it at this point, and I really couldn't care less about his opinion of me."

"Alright," he sighed. "If you're sure." He pulled out his phone, checking his email and going through some messages while you started the interview from the beginning. You could hear him grumbling under his breath and huffing every time Howard said something rude, but you ignored it, just laying a hand on his leg to calm him down.

By the time it was over, Harry was clearly not too happy. "I can't believe I went back on that show," he shook his head. "I'm never doing that again. I'm so sorry about what he said about you, I honestly should have just left-"

"It's okay," you cut him off with a smile. "Also, it was kind of hot to hear you get mad at him."

"Yeah?" He smiled back. "I thought I was very tame, actually. I wanted to say some other things, but I figured that wouldn't be a very good look for me."

"Right, but the way you attacked him but stayed professional... very hot," you laughed, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," He smiled, turning his head to kiss your cheek in return. "Is she done? I really need to hold her after the day I've had," He sighed dramatically, throwing his head back.

"I'm sure," you laughed, handing Stevie over to him and pulling your shirt back into place. "She's all yours."

"Hi baby," he cooed, holding her close to his chest. "I missed you so much."

Stevie yawned in response, cuddling into him.

"Oh, you missed me too?" He grinned. "See that? She missed me."

"She did," You agreed. "She was looking around when she heard your voice on the interview, she wanted to know where you were."

"I'm sorry," he pouted down at her. "I'll never go away again, and I'll never let the bad man be mean to you again."

"I don't think she's too upset about it, Harry," you laughed. "She is only 3 months old. She didn't exactly understand anything that went on."

"Excuse me," he said, looking very offended. "She may only be 3 months old, but she's very smart."

"Right, she's a genius baby, how could I forget?"

"I don't know," Harry shook his head at Stevie. "How could she forget how smart you are, hmm?"

Stevie yawned again, stretching her arms above her head.

"She's ready to take a nap," you said.

"Can I just hold her? I know it's not a good habit, to let her be held to sleep, but I don't want to put her down yet," Harry said, looking up with such pleading eyes, you couldn't possibly say no. Not like you would have said no anyways, but he didn't need to know that.

"Of course you can," you stood up, kissing his forehead before you turned away. "I'm gonna do the dishes, then we can watch something if you want."

"No, let me do those," he immediately protested.

"Harry, it's okay, I haven't done anything around the house since she was born-"

"And I'm not about to let you start now," he cut you off. "Come back here, please? Let's start that new show we were looking at the other night."

"Fine, but later I'm going to help you with the dishes."

"Fine," he smiled, agreeing with your compromise, even though you both knew he would argue later. "Now come back here."

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x reader fanfiction #harry styles/reader fanfiction #harrystylesxyou #harry styles x you fanfiction #harrystylesxreader #harry styles/reader #harry styles/you #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles/you fanfiction #dad!harry #stevie #stevie fics

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 320: Deku vs. Class 1-A

Previously on BnHA: Flashback!Kacchan was all “fuck Deku and fuck his stupid goodbye letters, I need to speak to somebody in charge.” Endeavor was all “hello, I am Somebody In Charge.” Kacchan was all “listen up asshole, you need to let us go out and collect our wayward nerd because you stupidly left him alone with All Might and that’s a fast track to disaster right there.” Endeavor was all, “[self-incriminating silence].” Rat Principal was all, “okay sure, have fun kids.” Back in the present, class 1-A was all “hi Deku” and Deku was all “I’M FINE!!!!!” and Kacchan was all “THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU’D SAY YOU DUMB FUCKING NERD” and so the kids all got ready to fight, because OF COURSE they’re gonna fight. Sorry guys, but yeah it’s happening.

Today on BnHA: Kacchan is all “what’s up Deku you look like a possessed Rorschach test, so anyway how are the new quirks coming along.” Deku is all “they’re coming along like THIS” and uses Smokescreen to try and get away. Kacchan is all “PHASE ONE COMMENCE”, and Kouda, Sero, Jirou, and Ojiro leap into the fray to shower Deku with heaps of love and violence, because this is a shounen manga and kicking someone’s ass while simultaneously proclaiming your undying admiration for them is just how it’s done in these parts. The KoudaSeroOJirou squad then passes the baton to Satou, Momo, Tokoyami, Kaminari, and Shouji, who are all “fuck this mask” and do a bunch of stuff to tear Deku’s mask off because they’re the real heroes. Shouto is all “LOOK AT THE LITTLE CRYBABY, THAT’S RIGHT, GO AHEAD AND FUCKING CRY and by the way let us share your burden please,” and once again I swear this is all very deeply moving and touching within the actual context. The chapter ends with Tsuyu being all “look at me. I’m the cliffhanger now,” and damn.

lol what

I don’t think anyone was expecting that. I mean, not that I’ve got anything against Tsuyu or anything. anyways it’s a very nice cover and I love the colors and I hope this means Tsuyu’s gonna do something badass

also, “Deku vs Class A” -- pretty much the expected title, but it’s still got me hyped nonetheless fuck yeah let’s go

IIDA ANGST

Iida Tenya really said “fuck the uniform code, we’re leaving the helmet at home today.” sorry kids, prim and proper C-3PO Comic Relief Iida has left the building. can I interest you in some Serious Iida

meanwhile Kacchan is all “sup Deku, I heard you got a few more quirks, and might I just add that you look like the Snyder Cut of Detective Pikachu”

“you look like a tarred and feathered squid” okay easy there Kacchan. I mean it’s all true of course, but still

“thank you all for coming” OH EXCUSE ME SON, WERE YOU PLANNING ON GOING SOMEWHERE. LET’S JUST SEE HOW THAT PLAYS OUT

yep and there’s Smokescreen, right on cue

okay Horikoshi, I leave it in your hands. hopefully you can come up with some more interesting combos than my dumbass predictions lol

LOL THIS ISN’T A COMBO AT ALL

“explosions solve everything” -- Horikoshi Kouhei, 2021. something something shockwave, something something handwave ta-da no more smoke. lol okay then

oh, ouch

he would know, wouldn’t he. nice application of one of your many hard-earned life lessons, Kacchan

by the way you guys, just as an experiment, I’m going to try to anticipate some of the discourse this week in the hopes of preemptively addressing it and thus saving myself some time later on lol. so here’s our first test run!

ANTICIPATED DISCOURSE: “oh my god what a fucking hypocrite can you believe this fucking guy”

PREEMPTIVE REBUTTAL: it’s precisely because Kacchan has been in this exact situation himself that he’s able to recognize his past self in Deku now and call him out on it. just because it took him sixteen years to get it through his head that he can’t accomplish every single thing completely by himself doesn’t mean Deku has to go down that same path. so yeah, maybe it is a bit hypocritical, but if you insist that the only people qualified to call out stupid shit are people who have never done a single stupid thing in their own lives, then what you’re basically saying is that absolutely no one on earth is qualified lol. so yeah, I’d have to disagree

and one last unrelated note, I’m willing to bet the whole “you didn’t even say a word before you ran off” thing is possibly the first thing Kacchan’s said in this whole encounter that actually does stem from genuine hurt rather than his tough-love-harsh-truths strategy. I’M TAKING NOTES HERE HORIKOSHI. at this rate it’ll take twice as many chapters as DvK2 for them to hash out all the stuff between them, geez

anyway so I gotta say, so far Deku vs. Class A is looking an awful lot like a DvK3 wearing a hat, trenchcoat, and sunglasses lol

OH SHIT I TAKE IT BACK??

FUCK YEAH, YOU GO KOUDA. and I guess he ditched his mask as well! excellent

so far the strategy here seems to be “Kacchan says all the mean tough love shit while the rest of 1-A balances it out with warmth and kindness”, which actually works pretty well imo. Deku is one of those people that doesn’t usually need a Kacchan Translator anyway, but just in case, this is very efficient

mm but of course Deku is slingshotting himself away with Blackwhip. all right then, who’s up next!

FUCK YEAH

okay but seriously you guys, what is going on with Sero’s face in these last couple of chapters though, it’s really starting to unnerve me. is he trying to emulate Kacchan’s whole asymmetrical facial expressions thing?

in fact let me just quickly hit pause here because,

ANTICIPATED DISCOURSE: “SERO IS TOGA??!”

PREEMPTIVE REBUTTAL: no

oh snap looks like Jirou’s getting in on the action too!

poor Jirou probably spent days racking her brain trying to think of something she could bond with Deku over. is Horikoshi doing these in reverse order of the kids who have had the most interaction with him? that would explain why poor Kouda didn’t get a flashback lol

omg. well that answers that

so by my count, Satou and Hagakure are the only ones remaining in this first tier of kids who Still Appreciate Midoriya even though they’ve barely ever spoken two words to him in their lives lol. so they’ll probably be next, and then we’ll get to the next tier of kids who are pretty good friends with him but not quite besties. and then we’ll move on to the IidaRokiRaka trio, and then lastly, to the boy who is in a tier all his own

BUT FIRST, A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR

and by “sponsor” I mean the Dekuangst. just in case that wasn’t clear. indeed, many thanks to the Dekuangst for making this all possible

(ETA: okay so this whole “take me away” line seemed pretty weird to me, and sure enough it’s yet another one of those cases where only the verb is specified, and the object is left to the reader’s interpretation. so even though the translation says “take me away”, I’m pretty sure that what Deku’s actually saying is “take you away” -- as in, his loved ones will be taken away by AFO.

and that is literally the way he phrases it, though -- the verb used is “奪う” (ubau), meaning “to snatch away; to dispossess; to steal.” which, god, that hurts my whole goddamn heart though, because for him to say it like that?? not “AFO will kill you”, but “AFO will take you away from me.” he can’t have nice things anymore because of AFO. he can’t be around the people he loves because AFO will hurt them. he can’t have happiness because AFO will take it away from him. anyway so where the fuck is AFO right now, motherfucker I just want to talk.)

by the way can Ojiro just extend his tail to whatever fucking length he wants or what because it’s like twelve feet long in this panel lol

WOOO FUCK YEAH TOKOYAMI

YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!! BUT WHERE’S YOUR FLASHBACK? YOU’VE HAD A BUNCH OF INTERACTIONS WITH HIM, THAT’S NOT FAIR

okay so now Satou’s stepping in which is back to my anticipated order, so maybe Toko will finish his little moment afterward

dskfjfkk

“REMEMBER THAT TIME DEKU BORROWED SATOU’S FOOD COLORING” Horikoshi says, sweating. “AND REMEMBER THAT TIME HE, UM, SMILED IN HAGAKURE’S GENERAL DIRECTION”

actually I am curious about what Hagakure’s part will be because, you know, the whole traitor thing lol

(ETA: funny how we just skipped right over it huh. can we get a traitor reveal countdown started here? definitely getting close to that time.)

whoa lol wtf

MOMO??? THIS HAS MOMO WRITTEN ALL OVER IT DAMMIT

-- SWEET MOTHER OF FUCK

“SORRY MIDORIYA-SAN, I LEFT MY FUCKING CHILL AT HOME IN THE LOCKER NEXT TO IIDA’S HELMET” holy shit lmao

and here I thought she’d get a flashback to her time on the Baku Rescue Squad or something. but nope, no flashbacks from Momo, only terrifying sci-fi torture devices

poor Dark Shadow is such a trooper omg

“why am I the only one who has to make prolonged contact with his smelly disgusting self” taking one for the team there DS

FUCK YEAH KAMINARI NO JUTSU

THE PRICKLY BASTARD WHISPERER STRIKES AGAIN!! don’t suppose you brought any clean clothes you could sneakily force him into huh Kami

okay here we go, so now Shouji and Tokoyami are joining forces

um excuse me this is fucking awesome

wonder how he’ll break free? don’t think he’ll reveal Fa Jin until the end of the chapter, so maybe Air Force or something? idk

TOKO GETS AN EXTENDED MOMENT BECAUSE HE IS A TIER TWO PATREON REWARD LEVEL FRIEND YAY

WHY IS MOMO MAKING THIS FACE LOL YOUR THING WAS WAY WORSE

and Shouji just casually hitting him with what is easily the best comment from anyone yet. too bad Deku’s just gonna ignore it. you deserve better Shouji

KAMINARI OMFG

it only just occurred to me that Kami is currently trapped inside Dark Shadow right along with him lmao omg. realest one in the entirety of BnHA, right here. we will never forget your sacrifice

aaaaaaand Deku’s yeeting himself

do you really hate the thought of taking a bath that much my dude

oh shit the mask!!

-- oh shit the feels

o(TヘTo)

fuck. and I mean, we knew he was crying, that was a done deal. but still, to see him in this much pain is just...

and the acknowledgement that he knows they’re worried about him, but that it doesn’t change his mind one bit. this, right here, is why they have to be a bit harsh with him, you guys. because they’re up against the full, unbridled stubbornness of Midoriya fucking Izuku, and if they don’t match that stubbornness with an equal stubbornness of their own, they basically don’t stand a chance

(ETA: quick note that there is apparently another mistranslation here -- rather than saying that his friends are oblivious to the danger, what Deku is actually saying is that none of his friends have activated his Danger Sense once throughout this entire fight. which I had been wondering about, and it turns out Horikoshi actually confirmed it. so basically none of the kids bears any ill intent toward him, and there’s literal proof right there.

incidentally, as @class1akids​ pointed out, this also casts an interesting light on this chapter in terms of who hasn’t fought Deku yet. not to play the Hagakure Traitor Music for the billionth time you guys, but I’M JUST SAYING lol.)

anyway, but the good news is that they all seem to understand that. and the even better news is that we have reached the tier 3 friends!!

“OR ELSE” lol, great to see Shouto wielding his friendship just as aggressively as Deku once did towards him. I do love a good role reversal

p.s., ANTICIPATED DISCOURSE: “why is Shouto being so cruel to Deku can’t he see how hard this is on him”

PREEMPTIVE REBUTTAL: this is a callback to the classic “even heroes cry when they have to” Shouto line from chapter 137. Shouto is clearly following Kacchan’s lead here and going for the more ruthless approach, knowing that the gentle approach isn’t getting through to him (if anything it’s only making him more stubborn as we saw on the previous page). basically it’s his way of pointing out that even heroes are still only human, and so is Deku last time he checked

ah okay, and there Tsuyu is at last

okay real talk, I get why Tsuyu is included in the tier 3 friends, because she was one of the first people to team up with Deku going all the way back to USJ. but that said, this probably would have had more impact if their most recent interaction hadn’t been like 150 chapters ago

but anyway though it’s still a good speech. maybe not quite a cliffhanger-level speech, but a good speech nonetheless. in a way though, I’m glad to see that Horikoshi seemingly didn’t give a fuck whether he ended this on an actual cliffhanger or not for once

and that “headed toward the climax” part has me excited too, ngl. because if we really are getting to the so-called climax this soon, that makes me even more certain that there is indeed a DvK3 in the forecast. so I presume that next week (or I guess two weeks from now) will be the tier 3s along with the remaining tier 2s like Kirishima and Aoyama

and then after that, well... [orange and green banners being hoisted] [sound of screeching airhorns and vuvuzelas in the distance] [sound of All Might approaching in his car which I didn’t notice until I looked back at this page a second time whoops] THE PROPHECY WILL NOT BE DENIED

#bnha 320 #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #asui tsuyu #tokoyami fumikage #kaminari denki #todoroki shouto #class 1-a #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

[nct-lian]

relationships outside of sm

JENNIE + LIAN: JENLI

so iconic omg like how they do it, i have no idea

they hang out all the time and lian is literally ALWAYS on jennie’s instagram

the two of them once had an instagram story conversation over pigtails

like,, jennie posted a picture of lian’s pigtails for that one bicycle performance on her story and captioned it “pigtail baby” and then lian reposted it on her own story with a picture of jennie’s pigtails, captioning it “pigtail eomma”

speaking of eomma, jennie is genuinely her mother

jennie takes her shopping all the time

and in return, lian buys her food

the interactions these two used to have at award shows were SO CUTE

everyone remembers when jennie pretty much yelled out lian’s name and she just came running over to the members of blackpink after taeyong let her leave :(

i’m crying just thinking about it help

jennie also posted a full on instagram post for lian on her birthday and had such a sweet caption with it

it was something like “my daughter is finally 21 today! i hope she has an amazing day and i can’t wait to see her later tonight to give her a gift :) haneullie, lots of love from jennie eomma”

SPEAKING OF THE GIFT,, jennie bought her a whole ass $9000 necklace from chanel because she knew that lian was looking for more

IM IN TEARS AND SO ARE YOU ADMIT IT RN

jenli kpop bestest duo

dispatch once thought jennie was on a date with a girl but it turned out to just be her walking lian home after going shopping with her so they never posted anything about it

they were embarrassed they got something wrong so i get it

omfg when news came out that lian and jinwoo broke up mama jennie was threatening to punch the shit out of him

KEVIN + LIAN: LIMOON

what i’ve been waiting to write for so long okay here we go

so mf chaotic like there are compilations made of these two that scream “go crazy go stupid”

their time as guest mc’s for inkigayo was probably some of the best kpop content we’d gotten in a long ass time

KEVIN IS CAUTIOUS WHEN LETTING HER MEET HIS MEMBERS

cause she’s such a good friend to him and wtf why would he wanna share

“mine mine mine mine” constant dory vibes 24/7

lian thrives off of calling him by his korean name because she knows it annoys him

he’s constantly teasing her for having bagged milk in toronto so he deserves it

the one time lian and jacob talked to each other they seemed to be getting along too much for kevin’s liking so he really went:

“okay lian isn’t it time for you to go” because he WAS GETTING JEALOUSJCLSJX

their styles are pretty much complete opposites and everytime they take pictures together kevin never forgets to mention how off it all looks

“tf is that why are your clothes so boring”

“okay sNaKe pAnTs” because of that one eric moment on kpop daebak show where he said kevin had pants with snakes on them

ALSO BTW LIANS CLOTHES ARENT FUCKING BORING SHES JUST FANCY LIKE THAT

i’m getting heated let me calm down.

they normally speak in english to each other but since lian seems to be stuttering over her words when she isn’t speaking korean, he mixes in a few korean phrases every now and then to help her out

kevin is arguably the most hype every single time lian performs, like he really thinks there isn’t anything better

LIAN MAKES SURE TO UPDATE HER INSTAGRAM STORY WHENEVER TBZ HAVE A COMEBACK SO NCTZENS GO SUPPORT THEM

LIA + LIAN: LILIA

more lian x the canadian line WOOHOO

lia spent her trainee days really looking up to lian and she’s even mentioned before that she’d love for itzy to get the chance to collab with her for a song

she really has her fingers crossed for that btw

they actually met during an award show when ryujin, chaeryeong and yuna all had to leave because it was past curfew

lian decided to sit next to them and during all the intermissions between performances she, lia and yeji conversed to pass time

they ended up growing a friendship together but lian has a stronger bond with lia

she loves all the girls either way but yk

lia and lian love going to cafes together and taking adorable pictures :(

like whenever lia posts on itzy’s instagram midzeys don’t exactly know whether or not lian would be on it too :0

like lian normally posts all the scenery pictures she gets to keep her instagram pleasing whereas lia posts the pictures the two of them take together

my heart </3

lian treats lia like a whole daughter because it isn’t often she finds girls that are younger than her

*screams in the fact that majority of sm’s female artists are all from 2015 and under*

like when i say lian SPOILS her i’m not joking

she will randomly call lia up like:

“hey i’m gonna get you out of that dungeon, come get some chicken with me”

and then they’ll just hang out together

but only if lian is out of the dungeon herself because wbk she ain’t treated very well </3

EUNWOO + LIAN: WOOLI

their chemistry is fucking insane holy shit

like their acting for past to present was seriously so praised, netizens found it hard to believe it was all just for the show

dating rumours follow these two everywhere,, like everywhere

it’s one of the most popular ships inside ncity when it comes to lian and other idols

i kid you not one tweet said “chanhyeok treated jihye so well in past to present, i’m only wondering how well eunwoo would treat lian 👀”

LIKE STOP PUTTING IDEAS INTO PEOPLES HEADS YOURE KILING ME HERE ISTG

but yeah they do look really good together

and they’re an amazing pair for acting

when eunwoo started working with inyeop for true beauty, he said:

“hyung’s dating my girlfriend” because of the fact that both of them have acted with lian and BOTH of them dated her in the dramas

what a coincidence though

we all cried when we saw chanhyeok and jihye kiss for the first time DONT LIE

EUNWOO FOLLOWS HER ON INSTAGRAM

and they wished each other happy birthday on their instagram stories

there’s actually people who like to think that they dated while filming for past to present andddd they radiate big delulu vibes

like you know liskook shippers? wooli shipped are kinda the same, but not as intense (thank god)

BUT CAN WE BLAME THEM LIKE THEIR CHEMISTRY? THE WAY THEY TALKED TO EACH OTHER? PLEASE

they took a lot of cute pictures together behind the scenes (ノ﹏ヽ)

MOMO + LIAN: LIMO

DANCER DUO DANCER DUO

this ship isn’t actually as popular as we would like it to be, but nonetheless people love limo

a lot of interactions during award shows !!

like for example momo’s fancams always captured her dancing perfectly to lian’s choreo

and lian smiling in momo’s direction

i love them

when lian found out about heechul and momo’s relationship, she asked momo if she was her mom now because of how much of a father figure she considers heechul to be JDFJK

“i mean sure”

they’ve actually done a vlive together before (ᗒᗨᗕ)

it was when lian visited her at the twice dorms and they ended up getting bored so they decided to do a vlive in the living room

THEY PLAYED DARE OR DARE AND LIAN HAD TO DO THE TEARS CHALLENGE (so chan whee) ON MOMOS KARAOKE MACHINE

her throat was dry for the rest of the night

after seeing momo’s hair for the i can’t stop me era, lian actually wanted to cut it like that

but she decided against it because she loves her long hair too much

the two of them met on hit the stage where they competed against each other in a freestyle dance battle

after that they just started casually talking over the phone and became great friends

with the way momo talks about lian, you’d think they’re dating-

“oh, lian- she’s so pretty! i love her a lot!”

and the same goes for lian, she loves talking about momo’s dancing skills

JACKSON + LIAN: JACKLIAN

her dad :/

adopted her with amber liu like a year ago so now she’s just his daughter

supports each other like crazy not even joking

jackson promotes her on instagram and twitter 24/7

THEY HAVE SO MANY INTERACTIONS THANK GOD

lian was once given a ridiculously short dress while attending an award show and jackson gave her his jacket to wear over her legs because she wasn’t provided a blanket :(

(keep in mind, she went there without the members!)

lian added all his music to her playlist :)

once got drunk together and spent like three hours doing karaoke but it’s okay cause it was fun

speaking of getting drunk, jackson’s the cool dad that lets her do whatever she wants

he has his protective moments where he’s like “ma’am where are you going on that short of a dress” but he’s also like “hey wanna go get chicken and soju”

they both appeared on a radio show together as guests and they ruined the whole broadcast because they were too loud

like they kept getting out of their seats to go wave at all the fans outside the window and they were just fighting back and forth about whether or not lian’s extensions look real

according to jackson, they’re “NOT AUTHENTIC ENOUGH- LOVE YOUR HAIR FOR WHAT IT IS, LIANNA HANEUL BAE.” lian’s hair lives matter :/

PLSSS WHEN HYOSEOP AND LIAN STARTED DATING- no

jackson was so proud that his good friend was smooching his other good friend but the protective dad instincts really kicked in

“break her heart and you die no cap”

was surprisingly chill when they broke up though, he was just glad lian didn’t cry

SUNMI + LIAN: SUNLI

SUNMI IS HER MOM OHMYGOD

so many interactions

honestly took lian under wing once she debuted as a soloist

female kpop soloists gotta have each other’s backs in this industry man :(

sunmi calls lian her princess SOBS

lian always hugs sunmi at award shows, like if they’re sitting close together

or if they’re standing next to each other on stage

you bet your ass lian is gripping onto sunmi for dear life

did a photoshoot together for marie claire korea

they’re so hot bro

BUT THEY FIRST MET ON WEEKLY IDOL NOT LONG AFTER LIAN DEBUTED AS A SOLOIST

they were kinda awkward ngl uh

but by the end of it they were besties :DD

and they’ve been besties ever since

lian is the ceo of doing dance covers for sunmi’s songs

cmon lian we’re waiting for tail 👀

sunmi has actually met lian’s grandma </3

like her and lian were hanging out at the dorms while the boys were out on a schedule and her grandma just randomly showed up with homemade food so that was definitely a win

BANG CHAN + LIAN: LICHAN

they’ve been friends for a LOOONGGG time

and chain’s known her since dating back to like, smrookies era when lian was still a red velvet member

like at that time she had no idea he existed, but he was keeping up with her daily :(

chan plays her music on vlives all the time and he always knows the dance moves

like he just dances along in his chair and mumbles the lyrics

we love to see it

a lot of fans ship them together

SURPRISE SURPRSIE AH

only because chan gives off big pining energy

lian only looks at him like “:D” whereas he looks at her like “♡•♡”

kinda sad but

lian promotes him on live so often HVKSVU

“my friend chan is coming back with his group soon, you should check it out! :)”

and the way she just says “my friend chan” LIKE ITS SO OBVIOUSLY A FRIENDZONE BUT HE THINKS ITS ADORABLE

he once got a comment on a vlive to react to lian moments, obviously complying because who wouldn’t

there was this one clip of her saying “my friend chan from stay kids!” and whoever edited the compilation added in squishy noises right after while zooming in on her face

AND CHAN BLUSHED SO HARD NOO

“oh- hahaha, uhh, she’s so cute aw hahahah”

ASHLEY + LIAN: ASHLI

oh god not another lian x mom ship

ASHLEY LOVES LIAN WOAH

like she’s submitted lian’s resume to bm so many times so they could be part of the big tiddie committee together

ashley is constantly, and i mean constantly, reposting all of lian’s posts on her story with captions like “LOOK AT HER GO”

and lian has even discovered all the cool instagram filters because of ashley, and now we get the quality content from her that WE DESERVEEEEE

back when lian’s album came out, all ashley’s story really was was just screenshots of her streaming all the songs and calling them bops

when they first met in person after texting back in forth, ashley spammed her instagram story with pictures of lian that she took without her looking

these two radiate a lot of “YES GIRL WORKKK ITTT TURN THIS WAY OKAYYY POSE POSE POSE” energy

lian’s been featured in one of ashley’s youtube videos and it was when they met for the first time :)

they exchange a lot of gifts through the mail

like lian once found a mug when shopping with doyoung and she thought that it would fit ashley’s taste so she sent it to her apartment

and ever since then they just send random little gifts to each other’s houses

it’s so cute

MATCHING BUCKET HATS THEY HAVE MATCHING BUCKET HATS !!!!!!

ashley talks about lian all the time

she always says that for someone so young, she’s accomplished a lot and she’s really proud of her

they wanna do tiktoks with each other but they never have the time </3

lian spam comments on ashley’s instagram like “WOAH” “OKAYYYY” “YESYESYES”

#lian: relationships #nct addition #nct female member #kim chungha #nct 127 #nct #nct dream #wayv #ashley choi #lee sunmi #jackson wang #jennie kim #hirai momo #bang chan #kevin moon #lianna bae #lia itzy #nct 127 added member #nct 127 female member #nct dream added member #nct dream female member #nct 22nd member #nct 24th member

[variantia]

BELLUM.   some things to know about DR Chara since I’m tossing Chara’s Deltarune verse here as well

college student, probably around 24-25, roommates and besties with Asriel, they would literally rather visit his house on breaks than go home to their parents, they’re both 1000 % supportive of each other and total bros

they’re horribly allergic to the entire world, including most plants, but they’re majoring in horticulture and planning to be a gardener which kind of tells you all you need to know about them as a person.   more than once they’ve sneezed so many times in a row they accidentally knocked their reading glasses off, to their annoyance, though usually they’re not terribly bothered by their allergies unless someone else starts poking fun or being rude

comes from a well off family, their parents are control freaks BUT they don’t care much about Chara’s doings unless it comes to anything specific they do or don’t want Chara doing ; Chara has a lot of freedom until they don’t, and their parents tend to control them by using lack of finances to punish, taking away their access to shelter, food, etc., and forcing Chara to rely on others until their parents have decided they’ve been punished appropriately

no actual magical ability, but has managed to tap into a little bit of inherent magic all humans have, which means they can sense things about other people’s SOULs (such as, say, if someone’s SOUL is not the one that BELONGS in their body)

super polite just like Chara Classic, and less prone to sarcasm even around people they don’t like.   they’re much more of a doormat ... but they also don’t really like people all that much, especially crowds.   that said, you have to push them pretty damn far to get them to do anything less than polite, because propriety and manners are very important to them

they’re the Thorne family’s sole heir and since their family is a long line of humans capable of magic, they’re ... a disappointment.   their parents have tried various techniques (a la Ajax from Deadpool) to bring out Chara’s abilities ; stressing their body in hopes that the magic will come out from being triggered by keeping Chara’s body safe.   everything from starvation, to being shot at, to being quickly transferred from an ice bath to scalding water, to oxygen deprivation, to just about anything you can think of that might formally qualify as torture.   Chara is content to not be able to perform magic, unlike Chara Classic, but to their parents it’s a disgrace.   over the years, and continuing to the present day, they’ve put their child through the fucking wringer.

wardrobe consists of either tank tops and shorts or full suits.   super casual or super formal, no in between whatsoever.   someone help them.

unlike Chara Classic, they don’t have a constant smile (though they’re easygoing enough that they do smile frequently rather than frown or RBF) and they also don’t have the issues surrounding touch that their classic counterpart has.   in fact they’re incredibly quick to give in and admit they’re touch starved, and seek physical affection from other people, provided they know the people more than strangers or vague acquaintances.   however, unlike Chara Classic, it doesn’t really bother them if someone brushes up against them in a crowd or touches them by accident, even though they get anxious in crowds, it’s more social anxiety than anxiety surrounding touch

also unlike Chara Classic, they’re prone to crying much more easily.   they cry at romantic movies and Disney songs and they don’t even try to hold back if they get emotional, they cry very openly

#is that a fucking gremlin ?? ( OOC. ) #(( if you couldn't tell I love them just as much as Chara Classic and I'm infodumping cuz y'all don't know much bout them yet :D ))

[lilyclawthorne]

Separate Tides Thoughts

HAPPY SEASON 2 PREMIERE DAY!!

This is literally just a bunch of very stream of consciousness writing, from pretty much every time i had a thought about something while rewatching the episode so it may be messy/all over the place

my immediate concern about these videos luz is sending that aren’t going through, is what if the emperor does manage to even briefly open a portal?? would all of her messages suddenly go through only to not be able to contact again?? and maybe that’s why it kinda looks like a detective/conspiracy board behind camila in the trailer because she has plenty of information from luz herself that she now needs to piece together. 

completely unimportant detail but i figured lilith’s gem was like eda’s, in how eda’s gem seems to be a part of her, but we can see in luz’s video that it seems to be attached to lilith’s old dress so just what the fuck is up with eda having a gem in her body 

also the fact that they decided to be bounty hunters was odd to me, but it’s clear they really need the money. it was also clear later on that not only did eda not want luz to go after the selkidomus to keep her safe, but also because it was an innocent creature. part of me can’t help but wonder if internally a part of eda didn’t want to go after bigger bounties because having once been the biggest bounty herself, she knows that if the emperor wants them that badly then they may actually not be bad at all

i hate that last season everyone was cheering for eda to be freed, but now without magic they’re very willing to take advantage of her and talk about her. it’s mean and i expected public gossip to happen more for lilith for being a traitor, but then again people may not know about her magic yet so maybe they do still fear her a bit. all of this kinda tells me though that people bought belos’ crap about eda being stripped of her magic because she’s a wild witch, so they’re all judging her again

i love how bitter lilith is about the golden guard. also teen? kinda curious if any of our teens would’ve known him when very young or if he was raised specifically for this role

i like the detail on belos’ statue where there’s a crack over his eye around the same spot luz broke his mask

love how much eda cares for luz and puts her needs first and buying her the only foods she can digest and likes. such a mom. it’s also very clear that she’s struggling and doesn’t want luz to worry about it at all. also side note, love that lilith was asking about apple blood, pls let these sisters get drunk together.

it does not surprise me that eda likes to bring up the curse pretty casually as a retort back at lilith. it seems very in her nature to use it like that, but i can’t help but wonder if she’s avoiding actually addressing it. and if she keeps joking, will that affect lilith into like, idk a breakdown that forces the two of them to talk about it. 

LULU?? BESTIE?? thanks hooty i hate it

Luz you’re doing amazing sweetie, show them you’re no sea squirt. 

okay so now we can clearly see lilith’s magic is on it’s last legs. almost got herself fucking killed by some fire bees. that being said i’m very concerned about her whole “who am i without magic? without a coven?” i think she kinda misses the structure, and is still used to only knowing what to do simply because she had a leader to follow. 

“I AM A WITCH, UNHINGED” i think she’ll be adapting to the chaotic nature of the owl house crew in no time though if she keeps acting like this

“some kind of weird bird worm” i mean she’s not wrong....

“you have no idea what im going through” dramatic emo ass bitch

it does not surprise me that after pardoning eda, the coven would jump at the first opportunity to arrest her again. pretty sure she’ll be a wanted criminal again in no time.

golden guard very much concerns me. villains that go from really fun to intimidating or threatening as fast he seems to do here are ones i worry about. it kinda feels like he enjoys scaring people?? idk im not sure how to describe it. anyways threatening to hold them over the boiling seas where even the steam will give them third degrees feels really fucking cruel but maybe im empathizing here because at the time of writing this im still suffering from second degree burns i got three weeks ago so third degree sounds horrifying rn

love how excited lilith is seeing hooty at work when she’s not the one getting beaten up. 

I’m glad luz and eda are talking about luz’s guilt and that eda knows what she’s been carrying around now. i didn’t want to see luz carry around all that guilt for so long she’s too good for that AND its misplaced guilt. 

i do love though how at the beginning of the episodes we see the lengths eda will go to by prioritizing food for luz first and doing everything she can to keep the girl safe, and then we come back full circle to seeing the lengths luz is willing to go to for eda as well 

“my life is pretty great because i’m friends with luz the human” brb im CRYING.

Luz is SO clever. This girl is so smart and creative and her solution for helping the selkidomus is just wonderful. And also look at that fake selkidomus she made!! That is amazing!!

pls the raspberry Luz gave the golden guard was adorable

i LOVE the parallel between eda doing her first light glyphs and when luz did her first ones. i’m also glad eda didn’t struggle with the glyph like i’ve seen some people worry could have happened

just occurred to me that eda mentioned the gris will sell at the night market. its probably nothing but does make me concerned about them becoming night market vendors instead.

HOOTCIFER? thanks lilith i hate it. also combine it with lulu and you get lucifer. 

it’s hard to hear but as we go further into the scrying potion and see the emperor, and the very end of the “what are we eating” conversation that’s fading out from the owl house we hear lilith say “i’m fine with whatever, things are starting to feel right again” and idk if she means since she left the coven or for the first time since she was a kid but either way im so glad to hear it

also my brother pointed out belos is probably saying “knock knock human” because he knows he’s being spied on by the owl house with the potion and i hate that because if the emperor takes any action because of it, it’ll probably be another lilith fucked up moment because she didn’t think it through.

also, one other thing i couldn’t help but do in this episode was notice some parallels between luz and lilith! they’re both going out of their way to try and do something for eda, and are both insistent that they have to do this alone. but also lilith’s line about “you have no idea what im going through” really did make me think perhaps underneath everything she has a dramatic personality, and luz does too at times for fun and wouldn’t it be cute if they got along over something like that.

also this episode? great for pictures of lilith with messy hair, of her screaming, or general annoyance, so, enjoy:

pls i love this face and the noise she makes at this moment as well as her little ear twitch ^

this is my favorite messy hair screenshot  simply because it looks SO fluffy here and i want that for her ^

this particular screenshot ain’t about lilith, it’s about the face eda is making here and how cute it is!! ^

#the owl house #toh #owl house #separate tides #posting before my job starts and I end up busy until 6 pm 🙃

[invisibleinorange]

Bridgerton’s Adrift  | 20/?

Chapters: 20/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: M Warnings: Presumed Character Death Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington,  Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties),  Bridgerton Family Dynamics, Simon Hastings/Daphne Bridgerton Characters: Colin Bridgerton,  Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Anthony Featherington,  Benedict Bridgerton,  Portia Featherington, Violet Bridgerton,  Pretty Much Everyone (at points) Additional Tags:  Bridgerton, Polin Summary:  Unexpected bad news arrives for the Bridgerton Family (and friends) regarding Colin's travels. This will be a series that is set after "The Duke and I" or season one of the show. It is a companion piece to "Goodbyes".

Eloise didn’t know what it was like to fall in love.

Everything that she knew about the concept came from books or the relationships of people around her.  She only had a vague recollection of her parents prior to her father’s death. Half the time, it felt more like other people’s memories than her own.  She hated the fact that with every passing day she remembered her own father less and less.  Aubrey Hall had been her first home and yet it always felt strange to be there. London always felt more like home but that was where she’d spent the majority of her formative years.  She’d returned there out of love for her brother though.

Benedict hadn’t been himself since Colin returned.  She dared not speculate his feelings at first but she had known he was running away from something. She’d always been particularly close to him. Even though he didn’t tend to have many secrets, she usually was the family member to figure them out.  Just like he’d treated her cuts and bruises as a child, she wanted to fix whatever ailed him. That was why she followed him to Aubrey Hall.

She assumed that like all the past moments where they’d experienced an upset or difficulty they’d be able to fix it.  It was a bit of an egotistical notion to think that she could be the one to help him find his way back to the family but it was truly what she’d thought.

She had assumed it would be easy.  It wasn’t.

The brother that she found at Aubrey Hall looked like Benedict but there was something very hollow, sad about his presence. He was there but he might as well have not been. It had been weeks and despite having plenty of opportunity, he kept every conversation succinct and impersonal. He hadn’t once confided in her how he was feeling when she’d ask how he was. A simple ‘fine’ was his go-to reply and she knew he was far from it.

She had thought that if she brought up home, that might encourage him to speak about it.  Every time she received a letter from Penelope or an entry from Whistledown, he’d read it aloud.  He looked uncomfortable at the latest mentions of Colin and Penelope but the way he looked when she’d get a new article from Whistledown was much worst.  Even on a good day, those things would cause him to make an excuse and lock himself away. She usually wouldn’t see him until days later.

The first time he’d skipped a meal, she’d thought he might be ill and she’d even gone as far as to take it to his room for him.  The door was locked though and when she knocked he didn’t let her in to deliver it.   When he finally did emerge the next day, he looked tired and older but he acted as if he hadn’t been a ghost.

She’d had never seen him like this and she was beginning to worry.  It did cross her mind that Benedict might never return to the family. She didn’t want to meddle and make things worse but she didn’t like the state of things. She didn’t want to see her favorite brother unhappy but she also didn’t quite know what the solution was.

She had thought a solution could be found in non-familial companionship. He also didn’t seem to want to discuss that either. She’d casually suggested he reconnect with the Modiste or literally find anyone to be less gloomy. She’d mentally prepared herself for him to say no but she hadn’t been prepared for an absolute meltdown.

Benedict was always the quietest and the gentlest of her brothers. The bottled up emotions exploded at that suggestion though. He destroyed one of their mother’s favorite vases with fist. When he realized what he’d done, he cried and Eloise couldn’t remember ever seeing him cry. She knew it wasn’t about the vase or the fact he’d managed to hurt his hand. He didn’t say it but somehow she knew: his heart was broken.

If this was what love was like, Eloise was more certain than ever that she wanted nothing to do with it.

--

Even though Eloise didn’t tell him that she pitied him. Benedict knew it. He hadn’t asked her to come. He hadn’t wanted anyone to be there with him. He needed time to mourn in peace without anyone in the Ton judging him.  Penelope Featherington might not have been dead but she might as well have been.  She was going to marry Colin.

A few months ago, it wouldn’t have been a problem. He would have been thrilled at the choice and welcomed her into the family.  He didn’t think he could stomach it now. He couldn’t bear to put on a smile and watch her marry Colin. He couldn’t handle seeing them at family dinners and seeing her smile or laugh at the things Colin could say. He couldn’t handle thinking of them sharing a marital bed or her stomach swelling with his nieces and nephews.

He wasn’t foolish enough to try and stop it nor did he want to. He wanted nothing more than for her to be happy and he knew that she would be. He knew Colin would actually treat her well.

It was selfish but he intended to never return to London. If he’d been less of a coward he would have bought a ticket to America or France and slipped beyond his mother’s grasp. Aubrey Hall was his stepping stone.  He needed to go so far away that no one in the family could question why he didn’t return home for holidays or weddings.    

Eloise wasn’t letting him.

The morning after he’d cried in front of her, he debated leaving at first dawn.  She wasn’t a morning person so she wouldn’t hear him slip out and by the time she saw his letter informing her of his plans he’d be too far gone.

When he started to write the letter, he couldn’t bring himself to compose it so things continued on as they had been.

--

Mothers rarely interrupted the solitude of bachelor quarters but most men didn’t have Violet Bridgerton as their mother.  Anthony had been sleeping off a hangover when he heard his mother’s huff as she pushed back the curtains to the room.  The sunlight was appalling and he attempted to pull his pillow over his head.

“Where is your brother?” she demanded of him.

He grumbled in his sleep.

“At his place or… wherever Penelope is,” he said.

“That’s to be assumed. She told me she was visiting her family but Portia Featherington says she hasn’t seen her in weeks,” Violet said.

He lifted the pillow away, dark hair shaggy from bed head. His gaze moved to his mother and he realized she was worried and not actually mad. His brain caught up to the moment.

“I’m sure they’re fine,” he said after a moment.

“Colin was supposed to be with you at a match,” she said after a moment. “I can only imagine that there wasn’t one.”

Anthony debated covering for his little brother there but he knew better than to do that in this moment. Violet was a force and even if they were okay, he was going to have to go and find them.

“I was at the club until hours ago,” he confessed.  “If you’ll be so kind to give me some privacy I’ll get dressed and go find them.”

Violet crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes.

“I gave birth to you. There’s nothing I haven’t seen,” she uttered before complying and headed toward the door.  “You better find them before I do.”

--

Anthony checked every place he knew to search and came up empty handed as far as the city went.  He’d thought he would find them easily but there was no sign of them anywhere.  He begrudgingly called upon the Duke of Hastings for assistance.

Simon had far more resources in the city to operate from.

It was dusk before they learned from a servant who had heard from a footman that Colin had taken to sneaking away with Penelope for romantic time.  They’d apparently last been seen leaving the city in a carriage.

His theories went salacious but it was Daphne who suggested that perhaps there was nothing salacious happening at all.  It was possible that they were headed to Scotland to wed.

Anthony did the math in his head.  It would take 4-5 days if they traveled 12 hours at a time.  They had a good lead on him but if he traveled on horse instead of carriage, he might be able to catch up.  He didn’t necessary intend to stop them.  Perhaps if they wed, the family could finally have a little peace.

He took off immediately only stopping to rest the first time when he reached Aubrey Hall because he was famished and exhausted.  He knew he could find Eloise and Benedict there and if there was anyone who’d know how to find them it would be that pair.

He found them in the drawing room.

Eloise was face first in a book and Benedict was drawing.  He briefly caught sight of it and found it a bit… somber but now wasn’t the time to focus on that.

“What are you doing here?”  Eloise asked.

“I own this home,” Anthony said after a moment. “Besides, I needed rest and reinforcements.  Colin and Penelope have gone missing and my top suspicion is that they’re headed to Scotland.”

Benedict stiffened, struggling to keep his face impassable while Eloise looked alarmed at the news from London.

“You should just let them go,” Benedict said after a moment.

“I’m not planning to stop them,” he said with a sigh. “I’m mostly planning to drag them back home so our mother can murder them for not having the decency to inform someone of their intent as my wedding gift.”

“Coldstream Bridge,” Eloise said after a long moment. “Lady Whistledown mentioned it recently.  She was talking about – well, it was an elopement for a young Earl who fell in love with someone and couldn’t bear to await a special dispensation.”

Benedict was on his feet, grabbing his coast before there could additional discussion of it.  Anthony exchanged a glance with Eloise before shrugging.

“So much for rest,”  he grumbled before following him.

Series this work belongs to:

#bridgerton #benedict bridgerton #eloise bridgerton #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #⚜ writings — polin

[knightofthecourt]

Love Bites - Chapter 8

Belatrice Gray was a TA at Belgrave University, working hard to stay on top of her marking and trying not to flunk her own studies, when a night out with her bff Randall and his roommates, changed everything.

Hamish Duke x OC fiction with fluff, romance and angst. OC description has been left out to allow for reader personalisation!

“Stupid, stupid, STUPID.” The vending machine shook as Bela whacked the side of it, earning her a dirty look from a young, blonde woman sitting at the table across from her in the student lounge. 

She gave the machine another thump and her packet of Cheetos fell forward a fraction of an inch, and then stopped. Bela didn’t know whether to laugh, cry, or give the irritating box a good solid kick. 

“Wow, nothing gets a woman going like a faulty vending machine.” Randall joked as he joined his friend in front of the infernal device. “Don’t worry Bels, I’ve got you covered.”

He reached into his satchel and pulled out a Twix. As Bela took it with a small ‘thanks’, her eyes were suspiciously glassy. Randall grimaced, “Bad day?”

“Bad month.” Bela replied. 

“Still on for our epic film night?”  

Bela nodded. “When have I ever said no to The Princess Bride? We can grab snacks on the way to mine.”

As they walked Bela felt herself relax slightly, letting Randall’s easy chatter drown out the sounds of the students around them. 

“We thought we’d celebrate the end of finals but Jack was busy with Alyssa again, like always - must be a Tuesday, right? I wanted to go to B&C but Lil insisted on going to that new bar down the road, the one with all the bikers-” 

Bela nodded in sympathy, unwrapping her Twix. 

“And then we got SO drunk, Hamis-” Randall broke off suddenly.    

Bela looked at him. “You can say his name, Randall.” 

“I didn’t want to upset you.”

“Who’s upset?” Her eyes flashed. “It’s totally normal to sleep with someone who ditches you in their apartment and then ignores you for three weeks straight. The kids call it being ‘ghosted’ Randall, and it’s a normal part of the college experience.” 

Catching the look on her friend’s face she forced her expression into something she hoped resembled a smile. “Really,” she insisted, “I’m over it.” 

“Yes, of course you are - I’m totally convinced.” 

Bela had been trying her hardest to avoid drawing her friend into her little pity party over Hamish. She’d had her feelings hurt before by a guy - by a dozen guys, but this time it stung more than she wanted to admit. When Bela had woken alone in Hamish’s apartment with sore legs, a sore neck and, well, sore all over, she had been surprised. A few days and three unreturned texts later she’d been worried. After Randall had awkwardly confirmed over coffee, that Hamish was in fact, alive, she had been furious. 

Despite hitting all of the usual heartbreak remedies - romcom binges, a rather satisfying round of axe throwing at the hipster place round the corner, and just plain, wallowing - Bela’s feelings were as raw as they had been weeks ago. As much as she wanted to, she just wasn’t moving on. 

She’d quickly realised that talking to Randall was off the cards. He was her friend, but he was also Hamish’s friend. When she attempted to casually bring up the situation, his insistence that it was just a difficult and complicated situation (which he couldn’t explain to her), just made her feel worse. Besides, it wasn’t fair for her to put him in the middle of what was quickly turning into a bizarre and deeply depressing, failed romantic conquest.  

The final straw had been last Monday. She’d been walking home from class, distracted by the thought of another late night grading papers, when she rounded a corner and almost ran head-first into him. The countless nights spent imagining what she'd do if she saw Hamish did little to prepare her. There was no apology, no awkward exchange or attempt to excuse his abrupt absence from her life, Hamish had just turned on his heels and walked off in the opposite direction, leaving Bela, and a very confused Randall and Lilith in his wake. 

Once they’d all recovered from the moment, Lilith and Randall had offered to help carry the papers back to her apartment, but Bela politely and firmly refused. 

Instead she walked the 15 minute journey home, closed her front door on the outside world and then, after setting the papers neatly on her coffee table, burst into tears. 

“Bels,” said Randall, pulling her out of her thoughts. 

“Mmhm?” 

“I don’t think you’re fine.” He reached over and prised the mangled chocolate bar from her fist. “Blade and Chalice?” He suggested.    

“Yes, please,” Bela said with a weak smile. 

- - - - - 

“You’re gone and I gotta stay high, all the time, to keep you off my mind, ooOo-hoo, ooOoo-hoo.” Gabrielle warbled from a stage in the corner of the packed bar. 

“You didn’t tell me it was karaoke night.” Bela rolled her eyes as the brunette milked the spotlight for all she could. 

“She sounds like an angel.” Randall slurred, pouring himself another beer. 

Bela squinted at him. “Do you have a crush on Gabrielle?”

“Pffft,” Randall blinked a few times, trying to focus on the stage, “She does sing it well though…” 

“Right, I’m cutting you off.” 

“Nooooo, hells bells-ha! Bels. Get it?” 

“Yes,” Bela sighed, “I get it.”

Randall frowned. “But you’re not laughing.” 

“That’s because it wasn’t funny.” 

Randall grabbed his chest. “You wound me Bela. And to think I thought of you as my friend.” 

“A real friend would get us a refill from the bar.” Bela shook the empty pitcher. 

As Randall stumbled across the room she looked around. The Blade and Chalice was packed with students, regulars and - was that? Yep - even a few professors. They’d managed to snag a table by the door when they got there but as the hours ticked on the place had quickly filled up and was now almost uncomfortably busy. The promise of cheap beer and bad karaoke clearly drew a big crowd and though it wasn’t Bela’s usual idea of a good night, she couldn’t deny that sitting here with her friend, downing drinks and mocking the performances was actually proving to be a pretty decent distraction. 

“I have a surprise for you.”

“Is it more beer?” 

Randall placed the pitcher on the table between them. “No, well yes. But also I signed us up for a song.” 

“Oh great, so we can be the drunk idiots everyone’s making fun of?” 

“C’mon Bels, it’s just a bit of fun. Let’s do something funnnnnnn, for once in our lives! No one cares, they’re all at least five beers deep anyway.”  

Bela huffed. He had a point.

“Fine, but I’m not singing a ballad.” 

Randall did a happy dance and dragged Bella up to the stage. As the first chords of Now or Never by Halsey began, Bela grimaced. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me, Randall.” 

“Big smile doll, it’s showtime!” He launched into the first verse. “I don’t wanna fight right now. Know you always right. Know I need you round with me, but nobody waitin’ round with me.” 

Bela groaned as he smiled in encouragement. “Been through the ups, yeah the ups and the downs with me. Got a whole lot of love, but you don’t wanna spread it round with me.”

“Let’s take it to the chorus!” Randall shouted into the mic. Bela smiled at her friend, he was clearly having the time of his life.     

Randall’s voice joined hers as they sang together, “Baby gon’ love me now, now, now, now, now or never. I want you to hold me down, down, down, down, down forever.” Randall shook his hips, eliciting a chorus of cheers and whistles from the crowd. 

Bela giggled, for the first time in ages she was actually kind of enjoying herself. The beer gave her a fuzzy, comfortably numb feeling and as she watched Randall crooning into his mic, dancing provocatively in front of the crowd she couldn’t help but grin. When he noticed her smiling he grabbed her hand and twirled her round. They finished their song with a flourish and made their way off the stage. 

As they stepped down Gabrielle approached Randall. “Nice dance moves,” She said, leaning close to him and batting her long lashes. “Want to buy me a drink?”.   

He looked at her like a deer caught in headlights for a second and then remembered why he was in the bar in the first place. “Uh, I’m hanging with my bestie tonight.” 

Bela rolled her eyes and leaned over to him. “Are you crazy? Go have fun - I’m fine!” 

“No, I’m not leaving you alone”. 

“Don’t be an idiot. Tonight was awesome, consider me cheered up! Now go.” She gave him a gentle shove in Gabrielle’s direction. He flashed her a hasty thumbs up and mouthed wish me luck, before following her to the bar.

Bela smiled to herself, Gabrielle was going to eat that boy  alive. 

She was making her way back to the table to grab her bag when she bumped into someone coming from the direction of the bar. 

Lilith swore loudly as the glasses she was holding splashed over, catching the front of her jeans. “Seriously? I just got these, watch where you’re going, you drunk- oh. Shit. Hi”. Lilith looked up, her anger fizzling when she recognised Bela.  

Oh God, Bela thought, if Lilith was here did that mean…?

As if she could read her mind, Lilith raised the glasses. “Uh…I’m just here for a nightcap.” 

Bela eyed the drinks - a beer and a scotch. “Both of those for you?” 

“Yep. What? Now only men can be alcoholics?” 

Bela felt the effects of the beer evaporating quickly, along with her good mood. She didn’t really want to spoil her first good night in ages and the last thing she wanted right now was to start an argument with Hamish’s aggressively possessive bff. “Ok, sure. Have fun.” 

Bela grabbed her bag and coat and headed towards the door, just as the bell above it chimed. 

She noticed Hamish before he saw her. He was wrapped in a thick coat, buttoned up against the cold, distracted by the phone in his hand. Lilith shoved past her, approaching him quickly.

“Haim, sorry I didn’t realise - Randall said they were going to be at-”

He looked up to the sound of her voice, in confusion, before his eyes slid over past her shoulder and locked with Bela’s. 

Bela watched in shock as he snarled - actually snarled - at Lilith and then turned and walked straight out of the bar. 

Lilith huffed and slammed her drinks down on the closest table. “Really! Again?”

#the order #hamish duke #hamish duke x reader #hamish duke x oc #randall carpio #lillith bathory #werewolf #the knights of st christopher #the knights of saint christopher #love bites

[kerwritesthings]

Dance Your Way Into My Heart

Summary: It’s more than just that feeling of love, it’s the actions, and the talk of forever

Word Count: just a little over 2.6k

Warnings: more soft, squishy, lovely words with a side of wedding fluff

Author Notes: So, this is my 10th ‘full-length’ one shot in this verse which boggles my mind since it’s ONLY been about a month (a day or two off actually – I first posted late the night of Jan 18!) since I started writing around this fool heart. I think he, and this place, the people and the creativity, really came to me when I’ve needed it the most. Sooo, now that the emotional nonsense has been blithered out. Here’s a little something for that…

Funny enough that this all hit me the Wednesday/Thursday before any of Josiah’s wedding stuff hit. Another pretty photo reblog from @rainbowshawn​ that set me on a spiral of ohhh shit I can see him singing at a super casual wedding like this and then the next thing you know I’ve busted out 500ish words on my Notes app on my phone while at a bar waiting for my friend before seeing Moulin Rouge on Broadway that night, total aside THE SHOW IS AMAZING – listen to the OBC album cause it’s bomb, however I digress. 

As always, these can be read as stand-alone one shots, but they all fall under the umbrella of this verse of mine. Reading the previous would provide some context. Masterlist can be found here!

As soon as she asks, Shawn immediately said yes. He's such a sucker for love and weddings and basically anything to make you happy. So, when your best friend asks you if you’d think he would be willing to sing at her wedding, you mention she would need to talk to him and ask. So, she flies up for a weekend under the onus of coming to hang out with you. However, she takes him to lunch one afternoon just the two of them, his favorite place downtown, nervous and anxious. However, you understood it was a shoe in. It was sweet though she wants to go the extra mile with him.

“You knew?” he asks, flopping down on the couch next to you, head immediately falling in your lap as soon as he gets back home. 

“Mmhmm,” you mutter, hands automatically winding through his hair. “Told her she needed to talk to you though. Maid of honor duties only go so far you know. What did you say?”

“Yes, duh. Of course, yes,” he replies, eyes fluttering shut as he relaxes into your touch. “Didi is your best friend, she’s the closest thing you have to a sister. Of course, I’m going to sing for her for her wedding. Plus, it’s going to be so super chill and laid back. I told her to give me a few things she and Tomas like and I’ll work around with that. I also told her I want first dance duty. No wedding band or DJ should have your bestie’s special moment.”

“You’re something else and I love you. Thank you, sweetheart. It means a lot to her. And even more to me,” you whisper, leaning down to dust a kiss to his forehead, another to his nose before reaching his lips.

Didi can’t stop raving, gushing and thanking you and him. The key smash texts are adorable and you both appreciate the lovely case of rosé champagne she sends over. Tomas, separately, takes him for a boys night at Maple Leafs game next time he’s in town as a personal show of thanks for helping his future wife. Shawn takes his role seriously, copious notes and hours locked away in his studio practicing or grumbling some days. It’s heartwarming to see how much care he took in this. “At some point, she’s practically going to be my sister-in-law, so yeah,” he blushes, after explaining the latest iteration of songs he’s going through. “Plus, it’s her wedding day. Needs to be epic and as perfect as possible. I’m going to make sure it’s that.”

He says it so nonchalant, so matter of fact, and without hesitation: At some point, she’s practically going to be my sister-in-law. It hits you square in the gut. You both know how deep your feelings run for each other, and you’ve had a few abstract talks, a few serious ones too, along with a more pointed talk specifically about the future. But you’ve never heard him speak of it with such assured conviction. Like it’s happening soon. You just look at him, jaw slightly dropped and eyes wide. 

“You’re gonna catch flies like that my dear,” he smirks, tapping his pointer finger up under your chin to close your mouth. Before you can reply, he leans in to kiss you sweetly, slowly and thoroughly. 

“You know you’re my forever,” he sighs against your lips, just a hair away from yours. He presses a soft, quick peck to both corners of your mouth before one squarely against you. “I’ve thought about it a lot more lately. Since Santa Barbara and our breakfast by the pool, really. Of us doing this ourselves and what our wedding would be. I know the new album and the tour, and all that shit is a thing happening, but I also know you mean everything so…”

You don’t know what to say, tears forming at the corners of your eyes. You just look at him, hand coming up to cup his cheek. 

“This is not going there now, because this would be a lame as fuck as a story to tell on how I proposed to you, but just know. I’m thinking about it. Really and truly,” he reveals through a bright smile. “I love you, so, so much baby.”

You can’t help but shift your arms around him, face nuzzling into the side of his neck. This boy of yours. He’s something extraordinary. 

At the rehearsal dinner, you spy him and Didi in deep conversation before you’re all due to sit down for dessert. 

“He won’t tell me what they decided on, Didi either,” you explain to Didi’s sister Renee, as you head towards your table. “They’re being sneaky little shits, but you know Dee.”

Renee laughs, “Are you really surprised? After you’ve been friends for this long? It’s sweet of your man to be willing to do all this for them. I’ve already warned all cousins and the brothers’ idiot dates they are not to fawn over him, that he’s beyond happily taken by the maid of honor, and that if I see cell phones obnoxiously in the way at any point this weekend, I’m breaking them in some way.”

You hear his laugh before you feel his arm wrap about your waist. “This is why Renee is the best. She won’t take anyone’s shit. Even from her own family. Thanks girl. Appreciate you having my back,” he smiles, fist bumping Renee. “I owe you one.”

“Holding you to that, Mendes,” she grins widely. “Just make sure this one doesn’t lose her shit this weekend taking care of my sister. But I will gladly use that marker, especially next time your hot friends are around. Speaking of, I should go check on my parents, make sure my brothers haven’t done anything stupid.”

“Is Didi driving you batty?” he asks, guiding you into your chair. “She seems okay tonight.”

“Crowd around, her parents, Tomas’ family, she’s holding her own but there was some stupid family shit earlier,” you exhale, grabbing a hold of his hand to lace through yours, before tipping your head against his shoulder. “It’s nothing that I didn’t expect to deal with this weekend. She’s nervous, worried, second and fifth guessing things. I get it, this is a lot. She just wants to be married already.”

Shawn dusts a kiss to your temple, “You’re such a good friend. You’re lucky to have each other. Tomorrow’s going to be great. Worse case, steal my flask and get her a little saucy before she walks down the aisle.”

You elbow him with a giggle, “You would suggest that, but you may be onto something. Thank you though.”

The next morning is a whirlwind of champagne, bobby pins and lip gloss with a soundtrack full of laughter and a lot of fighting back tears. You also may have sung along to your boyfriend’s last album, dancing around like you would do in her room when you were kids to your favorite songs. Didi’s suite is a buzz with her sister holding down the fort, cousins popping in and out, along with her mother and her future mother-in-law. At one point, after the glam team is gone, you finally have a moment alone with your best friend while her mom and sister go to grab her dress.

“I am so happy you’re deliriously happy,” you whisper, hugging Didi tightly before more folks come in. “You two are good together and I’m glad you found him.”

Didi sniffs, “Thank you, I know I’ve been insane, and you’ve been a saint. Your boyfriend too. Shawn has put up with me changing my mind on stuff like 17 times and he’s just rolled with it. You’re a lucky one too. He’s so fucking over the moon for you girly. Soon roles will be reversed, and you’ll be able to pay me back with your own crazy.”

You both scurry about to get into your dresses. With the wedding taking place at the botanical gardens, Didi decided she didn’t want fussy for anything around the ceremony. Her dress is a stunning V-neck sheath of flowy creamy, buttery chiffon, tiny flowers woven through her hair in place of a veil. Tomas’ grandmother’s necklace, a vintage diamond and pearl strand, lays just at her collarbones. You try not to cry but think back of the two little five-year-old girls who would play wedding in your grandparents’ back yard. “Oh Dee,” you sniff. “Tomas isn’t going to know what hit him.”

She smiles, her eyes just as wet, and reaches for your hands. “I couldn’t be up there without you, bestie.” You hear the flicker of a camera, knowing the photographer is back catching your moment and you’re grateful. “Your boy either. I know you hemmed and hawed about black for a wedding, but this dress is great.”

You’re the only one standing up with her, she didn’t want anyone up there with her other than you. Renee understood and was happy she didn’t have to wrangle a groomsman. She picked a black maxi, swirled with larger flowers in shades of pink and white. Your hair was up, a flower like the ones in your dress tucked in the mass of curls her stylist pinned about. Your bouquet is in a similar palate, while Didi’s has some purple, her favorite color, woven through. 

“Let’s go get you married,” you say handing off her bouquet and tucking her arm under yours. 

“Hey pretty girl, funny seeing you here,” he quips, his lips dusting against your bare shoulder, before tracing a finger across your back. You’re all outside the courtyard waiting to enter for the start of the ceremony. You turn to face him. He’s a vision, because of course he is when isn’t he, in black floral-patterned button down, similar to your dress, along with dark pants. What’s more interesting is that his beloved acoustic strung across his chest.

“I may have told Didi I would play all her walk-in music too,” he nods bashfully. “I wasn’t going to let them use Apple Music or Spotify or even worse some awful wedding singer.”

“You are something else, Shawn,” you reply, squeezing his hand tightly. “Really want to kiss you but I can’t mess up the gloss.”

He places a whisper of a kiss on your forehead, “Love you. I need to go get into place. Atmosphere music. Think I may sneak in one of my own in there before the processional stuff.”

You laugh, pushing him towards the archway of greenery, “Go be wonderful.”

He’s set up at the back of the courtyard, seats all set in front of him. He’s weaving melodies, no singing, just soft rhythms from his guitar. The space is perfect, green and lush and smelling lovely, a swath of flowers at the end of the path where Tomas waits. You make your way down and turn to watch for your best friend. However, before she arrives you take a moment to appreciate Shawn. He catches your eye, smiles and winks, mouthing love you before he sees the wedding coordinator waiving over at him. 

He starts in on “Marry Me” when Didi arrives at the back of the aisle with her Dad. Your breath catches in your throat, the combination of seeing your best friend and hearing your boyfriend hits you hard. She starts making her way down when he begins on the chorus. You see Tomas out of the corner of your eye, and he’s got a hand over his mouth, eyes brimming over with tears. The ceremony is the perfect balance of exactly what Didi and Tomas are. Their vows are intrinsically them. They look every way that a couple getting married should. Glowing, in love and only eyes for each other. It’s hard not to let a tear or two out. 

The reception is in the atrium of the gardens, under a massive domed stained-glass skylight, still lush with flowers and greens. Everything has been exactly as Didi has hoped. Meanwhile, your boyfriend is mysteriously missing. You’re sipping champagne with Renee and her boyfriend of the moment, while looking about for him. 

“Last I saw him he was setting his guitar up before the rest of the musicians came in, don’t worry,” Renee starts, clinking glasses with you. “He’ll be back.”

He makes his way back into the atrium, and surprisingly he’s changed, a little dressier now in deliciously fitting black suit pants and a white button down, the glint of his silver chain obvious even from where you are. You excuse yourself from the group and steal Shawn away before he needs to soundcheck for their dance. You just want to have a moment with him before everything gets crazy, heading out to the patio just off the atrium, which is blissfully quiet. You wrap your arms around his waist and just hold him. 

“You okay baby?” he asks, as he starts to sway with you, shifting your arms around his neck so he can pull you closer. 

You nod, smiling, “I just needed you for a minute without all that is all.”

“You can have all the minutes you ever want or need,” he says, kissing you lightly. 

“Sorry to break this up, please believe me I am, but my sister has decided she wants to get a move on,” Renee calls from the doorway. 

“Duty calls for both of us,” you murmur, leaning up to kiss him once more. “Save me a dance or two?”

“All the slow ones at least,” he agrees, rubbing his nose against yours. “I’ll see you out there.”

Didi didn’t want a whole production with entrances, she wanted a few bars of song then for her and Tomas to start dancing straightaway. So, poised at the edge of what they have set up as the dance floor, with a good angle to see them once they walk in, as well as your boyfriend, you wait. Shawn starts playing, something floaty that that doesn’t sound familiar to you. The pair make their way in and as soon as they hit the center of the floor, he begins. 

“Not talkin' 'bout a year, no not three or four. I don't want that kind of forever in my life anymore,” he sings gently. “Forever always seems to be around when it begins, but forever never seems to be around when it ends. So, give me your forever, please your forever. Not a day less will do, from you.”

The song is beautiful, he sounds amazing, Didi and Tomas as just love personified as they dance. He fades out slowly at the end, a light strum to close out. 

“Thank you for letting me be such a special part of your day. That was Ben Harper’s Forever. Didi, Tomas, congratulations and love to you both,” he expresses, blowing a kiss to the two of them with his hands, you can see his emotions clear across his face. He heads back, as the band starts up, packing away his guitar before making his way over to you, now at your table.

“Wow,” you sigh, hand coming to the nape of his neck to sink into his curls. “That was something else, my dear. Didi fucking owes you.”

He blushes, ducking his head bashfully. “I’m just happy I could give them that moment. First dances are something really special. They deserved to have the best moment possible. Plus, that’s an awesome first dance song, not the usual. Makes it even better.”

“My hopeless romantic,” you muse, tracing haphazard patterns over the top of his hand that rests on your knee. 

“Just you wait,” he smiles, kissing you. “Now, I’m on good authority the next song is a slow one, so may I have this dance?”

He stands, holding his hand out for you. 

“You can have every single one, all of them from now on.”

TAG LIST: @whenidance​, @parkerdavis​, @sinplisticshawn​, @hollandraul​, @fallinallincurls​, @itrocksmysocks​, @rainbowshawn​, @lasingphomustra​, @illumecherry​

*Always feel free to ask to be added to the tag list! 

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes oneshot #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes story

[desparikon]

Murdoc/Mac + s4 distress

I really like the idea of The Merchant, Murdoc, and Helman all trapped in the black site together, but the lack of Murdoc’s screeching of ‘BFF Angus Visiting Someone Other Than Me?!?!’ was disappointing, so maybe Murdoc just...got bored and escaped.

(The Merchant is supposed to be in the black site, right? Because when Mac breaks Scarlett out, her cell looked the same, but it was in the Phoenix building. So just a case of reusing sets?)

Tonight wasn't going to be a good night.

Mac stared at the beer in his fridge. Was he really doing this? Riley and Desi had left maybe 15 minutes ago. Starting to drink now wasn’t an admission of fear of being alone with his thoughts; it was just taking advantage of the alone time.

No. No. Get involved with something else.

He shut the fridge and sighed, plodding back across the room, and up the stairs to the veranda. His many projects scattered about, in various stages of completion, mocked him. None of them were currently appealing, despite his fingers’ itch for activity. Why was he so often bored, yet could never focus long enough to see one through?

No time for idlness. The world needs saving.

Codex, the impending apocalypse, his aunt. He wanted to hate what they stood for, but deep down, admitted there was some logic to it. And he wanted the familial connection to have a solid place in the world. His dad, his mom’s good memory, his chance at any normal family members, gone. Jack, MIA. His friends wouldn’t be far behind, thanks to his growing indecisiveness and unreliability. Being alone hurt, but it was better to push them away before he burdened them with his feelings, his existence. Any deaths due to his failures already ate at him. Having any one of their deaths on him would literally kill him.

It was too heavy. His life was shattering into a million pieces, and all he could do was watch as the shards slipped through his fingers. He wanted to go back. Back to when every little thing didn't lead to catastrophe. Repairing one shard, at the expense of all the others. It was exhausting.

He couldn't fight the darkness. Not tonight. He was going to lock himself in his room, and drink as much of his hidden stash as possible. Since his brain insisted on lacking an off switch, he’d shut it down by force.

The exciting prospect of hard alcohol, and the warm, blanketing buzz it’d bring, lifted his mood. The fuzziness would come quick, and it’d be his little secret. No awkwardness. No prying. No ‘Mac, there were a dozen beers--’

The force from plowing into an unexpected obstacle jolted him into a backwards stumble.

“Attacking me already! I haven’t even done anything yet!”

“Murdoc.” His sudden appearance stunned Mac. All the time that’d passed without incident since Murdoc had escaped had left him secretly saddened that Murdoc had grown bored of him. Ironically, at a time when their worldviews were becoming closer aligned.

“Do you have to sound so disappointed?”

“I’m not disappointed, just...surprised. Thought you’d finally gotten tired of me.”

“Tired of you?” His slightly narrowed eyes and suspicious expression warned Mac that his indifferent front was failing. Murdoc was picking up on something.

Dammit! He had to be careful, and get this perfect; any sign of weakness, and Murdoc would discover everything (if he hadn’t already), and use that knowledge to give the one, final tap to destroy him.

What a waste of their cat and mouse games.

“I could never get tired of you, MacGyver. I—actually, more so you—have been busy.”

Mac retreated to the kitchen sink, hoping to find dishes, empty cans, anything, to distract him from Murdoc’s interpretation of the chaos his life had fallen into, but Murdoc followed, settling himself onto the counter.

“The Phoenix shutting down, forcing you into an ordinary life. Your genius being wasted on low-level teaching gigs. Painful. It’s a shame I wasn’t around to help.”

“I...survived.”

“As you do. But wait! From the ashes, Phoenix gets bought and reopened, returning to its former glory under new management! I love that! It’s beautiful. Gets you right here.” Murdoc patted a fist over his heart.

“You always manage to keep track of me.”

“I pride myself on being informed about your life.”

Mac rubbed the back of his neck, and shrugged his shoulders to prevent them from locking up further. Murdoc said all that so casually, like the whole time hadn’t been miserable, but most noticeable was the lack of mention about Codex or his dad’s death. Surely Murdoc still had enough connections to know of them, but maybe he didn’t realize Mac’s personal stake.

That’s what he needed. Someone who wasn’t involved in this whole train wreck. Murdoc had liked him when he’d been blinded by idealism. Maybe he’d like the new, damaged Mac. Even if he hadn’t been the cause.

“We’re besties, and I consider you and Team Phoenix to be my pet project. Speaking of, your new boss is interesting, kinda strange fit for The Phoenix, don’t you think? Can’t imagine him and Matilda get along too well. Now don’t get jealous, but I think I’d like to meet him.”

“Russ would just love that, as I’m sure the views through the cameras weren’t enough.”

“I know, I know. Everyone loves me, but I’m more impressive in person.” Murdoc directed an offended glare in his direction, “Don’t snort, Angus. You know it’s true.”

His confidence was undeterred by Mac’s knowing smile. “Also noticed that the newbie stuck around. Since she’s going to stay awhile, I think new introductions are in order.”

“Her fist to your face?”

“And Bozer made a movie! Good for him! I need to congratulate him. At his new place, since you have New Roomie Riley now. She’s too good for some tech shop. All of you. Too good for an ordinary life.”

“You’re full of compliments tonight.”

“While I wish they’d be used for better purposes, I’ve always appreciated the skills each of you have. ‘Cept when they’re being used to hunt me.”

Murdoc’s playful grin was infectious, almost making him forget that Murdoc could choose to be a threat whenever he got bored. Ugh, so cute. It was embarrassing how attractive he found Murdoc, even just physically.

“By the way, when’s she moving to Desiree’s? Seriously. Took them forever to leave. I was starting to think I’d have to sneak in through the rooftop portal in your room.”

Typical Murdoc, pleased to talk about stalking, and breaking and entering. The eagerness to talk to Mac hadn’t changed, and it made him smile, even as guilt began creeping in. He’d said terrible things to Murdoc, personal attacks that weren’t necessary, and at times when it’d been uncalled for. How long had he railed Murdoc when they’d gone to Colombia? And how could he forget how the viciousness he’d directed at Murdoc, even after he’d already surrendered to Phoenix’s custody? After everything, why did Murdoc still like him so much?

“When’s it my turn to be nosy?”

“You want to know more about me?! Ohmygosh, this is-- I’m going to cry.” Murdoc fake sniffled, his eyes gleaming with excitement.

“Two things?”  

“Shoot.”

“OK, how’d you escape?”

“A magician never reveals his secrets.”

Mac mirrored Murdoc’s smirk. “C’mon. Never? Even if it’d impress the audience?”

Murdoc smiled, despite a huff. “Is it more impressive that I didn’t plan it? Saw the opportunity, and took it. Improvised. Y’know, I think you’ve been a bigger influence on me than I realized.”

“Can you really call it an opportunity, though? Since you had to kill every other person in the building.”

“Oh, I can’t take credit for all that. Just Helman.”

“What? How…? You were the only survivor.”

Murdoc waved a dismissive hand at Mac’s bewilderedness, “I didn’t waste my time on the guards; they weren’t in my way. Everyone was too busy shooting each other, even before lights went out, or the “critical system failure”. This could come back to bite me, but you might want to tell your new boss to be a little more careful about who he hires in the future.”

Power failure? Infighting?

Codex. Could they have orchestrated Murdoc’s escape? Why? They’d never successfully recruit him, even if they demanded him to repaid a debt. And despite his thrill for violence, he wouldn’t be a good fit. He doesn’t get along with people, and definitely wouldn’t care for saving the world, or complying with a shadowy leader’s orders. Too chaotic, cynical, independent--

“What’s the second thing? Hopefully, something more interesting like, ‘The next time we team up…’”

“Why haven’t you taken Cassian?”

Murdoc’s hands curled around the edge of the counter, his knuckles paling from the force. “I don’t know where he is. With Matilda’s knack for hiding things, and your dad’s connections, it’s difficult. But it’s only a matter of time.”

“No.”

“Don’t worry, I know you don’t know. They bring him to you. Smart.”

“Lie! You’re lying! And at this point. You think I don’t – This is important! Murdoc!”

Mac didn’t bother to hide his aggravation. He’d speculated, and come to a conclusion that hit hard, especially now that he was dealing with the loss of his own dad. He needed to hear it from Murdoc, even if it was a confirmation.

“You should be happy! You said yourself that the best thing I could ever do was get away from him! What, you think I wasn’t listening?! To any of that?? You didn’t give me much choice.”

“I know!” Murdoc’s eyelids did that twitch of sadness that absolutely killed him. “I know.” Mac blinked against the tears welling up.

He couldn’t take it back, couldn’t take back the fact that he’d gone along with the punishment of taking away Cassian’s visits, effectively leading to the destruction of the only good thing in Murdoc’s life. And he’d taken Murdoc away from Cassian, who still loved his dad, had good memories of him, and happily talked about him.

Mac understood now, that he’d ruined everything.

“It wasn’t just what you said...I saw how happy he was, and realized that I’ll have to be happy with watching from afar.”

“For the rest of his life?”

“People like me don’t get a happy ending. I’ll always be running, hiding in the shadows, until the day I die. I did that. I trapped myself, and I’m not going to destroy Cassian’s life too.”

“But he needs you. You’re a part of him.”

“Does it make you feel better to have your dad back in your life after all this time? Because it doesn’t seem like it, judging by your rocky relationship. Is it worth it to have to say goodbye twice? Three times? Every single time it doesn’t work out?”

A few tears escaped down Mac’s face. "Every effort counts. Every minute counts! Even if you think he’ll hate you. Even if he says he hates you!! It. Doesn’t. Matter. You can’t get time back. Show him you care! Tell him the truth if he asks! Maybe he’ll say he wants nothing to do with you, but at least then, when you die, maybe he’ll have less questions and regrets. Don’t abandon him! Don’t leave him to wonder what--”

Mac fought to keep his voice steady around the lump in his throat. "—what would’ve happened if you’d come back sooner." He clapped a hand over his mouth to hide his quivering lip.

Don’t cry in front of Murdoc. Don’t cry in front of Murdoc. Don’t cry--

Mac hugged Murdoc, burying his face into Murdoc's shoulder to stifle his sobs. He couldn’t handle seeing Murdoc’s disappointment at his intellectual equal, his foil, his desired companion, broken and weak, and hanging all over him. Pathetic.

Murdoc’s arms hesitantly wrapped around him, and in the most sincere tone Mac had ever heard him use, whispered, “I’m sorry.”

#macgyver #mine

[krisbeecream]

Teach Me to be Brave Ch. 5

Read on AO3

The day whizzed by Manon in a blur of assignments and overheard excited chatter about Paris’ new dynamic duo. She moved from class to class without a thought, but the narrative of the students around her remained the same buzz of excitement and wonder. Before she knew it, the final bell was ringing, and it was time for her to take her leave and head home.

Emotionally, Manon was exhausted. Her body, of course, was largely unaffected by her gymnastic endeavors the night prior as a result of the magic in the suit. She found, however, that keeping up appearances and watching her every word very carefully to avoid any and all suspicion from her classmates was more weight than she was used to carrying on a daily basis.

“What’s for dinner tonight, then, Manon?” Remy elbowed Manon in the ribs to pull her from the mental fog she appeared to be lost in. The spunky brunette jolted and shook out her jumbled thoughts before turning to her best friend who was watching her pack up her things with a quirked eyebrow.

“Tonight’s menu features a Taleggio, Ham, and Cornichon baked croissant with a summer berry tossed salad accompaniment,” Manon declared in a fake fancy accent, putting on airs about her culinary creation-to-be. A strange, high-pitched, muffled whining noise was suddenly heard from the back corner of the room, and Manon turned to see Chris gripping something in the pocket of his black hoodie with all his might before he loudly coughed.

“What are you looking at, Chamack?” he bit, though the tips of his ears were tinging red with clear embarrassment. Manon rolled her eyes and turned back to her conversation without acknowledging the obnoxious boy.

“Chris, would you mind hanging back after class for a minute?” M. Agreste called out to him.

“Again?” Chris groaned. Manon couldn’t help herself, and she twisted around to stick her tongue out at him, hopeful that maybe their teacher had caught wind of his actions that day.

“God, my stomach is yowling. That’s either going to be really gross, or it’ll star in my hungry daydreams for weeks to come…” Remy grabbed the attention of his experimental chef bff again as he rubbed his stomach performatively.

“Who says you get any?” Manon scoffed, acting offended. Elise laughed her bright, sunshiney laugh as she hung off her boyfriend beside Manon.

“Your mom is lucky that she gets to try it! It’s definitely gonna be better than those bacon onion tempura lollipop abominations you brought for lunch yesterday.”

“When she bit into it, it brought a tear to my eye,” observed Remy. He dramatically brushed a finger across his bottom eyelid as if he were crying right then.

“Sometimes they’re hits, sometimes they’re misses! You still gotta take the shot,” Manon winked. All laughed as they slid their respective backpacks onto their shoulders and made to leave the room.

“Have a good evening, M. Agreste!” Manon called as they exited. Their spirited homeroom teacher looked up from his computer to smile warmly and wave to the trio.

“Goodnight, guys! Good luck on problem #6,” M. Agreste flashed a devilish grin at them, and Remy groaned in response. “Ready, Chris?”

The bully nodded reluctantly and headed for the front of the room as the teacher stood to close the door. Manon was silently disappointed that she didn’t get to hear the beginning of her rival being chewed out by an authority figure. She decided to try to watch his behavior tomorrow to see if he’d really given it to him.

The group of friends chatted casually on the stroll towards home, as they did every day after school. They all lived within the same neighborhood, so they were able to walk together most of the way before diverting onto their respective streets. Manon expounded on her recent trip to the produce market across town in search of the perfect, crisp cornichons she needed for her sandwiches. Elise updated the gang on her latest modern dance routine that she was cooking up for competition, flip-flopping on which moves were too complex for her to pull off in a fast-paced sequence like that. Remy filled them in on how his twin pet frogs were currently in a fight, refusing to occupy the same half of their tank at the same time. Manon suggested couples counseling.

“They’re not a couple, they’re brothers!” Remy shouted, his voice reverberating off the tall buildings surrounding the group of friends.

“That doesn’t always stop a relationship in the animal kingdom….” observed Elise.

“You are not allowed near Erlân and Ramón ever again.”

“Aw, come on! They love me!”

“Nuh uh. You’re a bad influence with those utterly impure frog thoughts you just aired.”

Manon rolled her eyes at her lovestruck besties as they bickered good-naturedly beside her. She loved them so, but thinking of that fact reminded her that, since last night, she was keeping a very large secret from them. Guilt quickly soured her mood.

“H-have a good night, guys. I’ll let you know how the croissants turn out! Maybe there will be enough leftovers for me to bring them for lunch tomorrow.” Manon tried to keep her voice even and cheerful as she turned rapidly down her street, breaking off from the group to hide her conflicted face.

“Oh, uh, bye, Manon!” Elise called at her rapidly retreating pal with a confused wave. She shrugged to Remy, and they continued walking and discussing frog technicalities.

“Are you feeling okay, Manon?” Tikki poked her little bulbous head out of Manon’s backpack to speak into her charge’s ear. A look of concern was plastered on her adorable face.

“Huh?” Manon startled, almost forgetting she had Tikki in there. “Sorry, Tikki. I just don’t like lying to people. It makes me feel… dirty.” The girl frowned.

“I’m sorry to hear that you’re upset, Manon. It’s a tough job to be a superhero, and it’s a lot of responsibility to have foisted on you all in an instant. However, Ladybug chose you because she knew that you could overcome the obstacles and thrive.” The kwami patted Manon’s shoulder with her tiny paw.

“That’s right! Ladybug chose me.” Manon looked confused, struck by the thought. “How does she assume these things about me? Do I know Ladybug?”

Tikki shook her head dismissively, “I am not allowed to speak the name of my previous owners to those who don’t already know it. It’s a magical spell placed on the Miraculous to protect secret identities if a kwami is captured, so don’t even ask,” she chuckled. “And anyway, I think maybe you should just get inside and look in your physics book.”

“I promise I’ll get the homework done, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Manon replied, twisting her head to look at the little bug creature over her shoulder with a curious quirked brow. “Science is usually my worst subject, but M. Agreste is a good teacher.”

Tikki shrugged and nodded. As they came upon Manon’s building, the girl keyed her code into the pad next to the front door and took the elevator to her floor. Once inside her apartment, she flopped her bag down on the couch and set about getting her dinner ingredients out of the fridge.

Tikki watched her new Chosen as she worked, a look of determination and excitement on the teen’s face like a great artist struck with inspiration. Manon turned the TV on for background noise, pulled out a cutting board, and began slicing up deli meat, cheese, and tiny pickles while the oven preheated. The brunette danced gracefully about the kitchen, pulling armfuls of sauces and liquids from the refrigerator, several spice jars from a tall cabinet, bowls from the dishwasher. Tikki caught the sparkle in Manon’s eye as she made various concoctions from citrus juices, vinegars, creams, seasonings, and oils in little bowls.

Twenty minutes later, the sandwiches were in the oven, roasting the croissants to a golden brown while the cheese melted. Manon wiped sweat from her thick brows and took down her hair from the ponytail she had tied it back into, shaking it out to her shoulder blades with a sigh.

“Phew. I hope this one works!”

“You look so alive while cooking! Is this a hobby of yours?” Tikki questioned, hovering over to the tired girl.

“Yeah!” Manon perked up instantly at the mention of her special interest. “I’ve been cooking things by myself since I was little, because my mom was always gone at night working. Over the years, I think my tastes have strayed from the norm, though…” she trailed off with a light giggle, reminiscing about the strange dishes she had come up with just in the last month.

“I think you have great taste,” Tikki beamed, “and I can’t wait to try a tiny bite of that sandwich when it’s done.” The hungry kwami rubbed her hands together and licked her lips, looking at the oven.

Manon laughed and felt herself relax slightly. She had really come to love cooking. Someday, she thought maybe she could open a restaurant, or maybe a bistro, to showcase her unique recipes. That is, if enough people actually liked them. She made a mental note to pinch off a tidbit of her sandwich to slip to Tikki during dinner later without her mother noticing.

Right on cue, Manon heard her mother’s key unlock the apartment door as the oven timer was about to ring out. Quickly telling Tikki to hide, Manon slipped on an oven mitt and pulled the tray out of the hot oven just as Nadja entered.

“Hey, Mom!” greeted Manon.

“Hi, Sweetie. How was school?” The pixie-haired talk show host replied to her daughter.

“Ah, nothing to write home about.” Manon shrugged, deciding not to vent about Chris and his goons today. She wanted to keep her spirits up to enjoy dinner.

“No new drama with that boy today?” Nadja asked anyway, like she had read Manon’s mind and decided to pry.

“Ahhh,” chuckled the girl, “He gave some trouble to Odette, the girl who got akumatized last night? She’s in my class.” With her face turned away from her mother, Manon frowned briefly as she glossed over the detail that she had been targeted by them as well, and may have even made herself an enemy of the group with just a few sentences.

“That’s a shame. I hope she didn’t let him get in her head. He seems too stupid for her to trouble herself with.” Nadja shook her head and looked up at the ceiling. She had heard plenty of earfuls about Chris Lahiffe and his jerky jock pals over the years, ramping up now that he and her daughter were in high school. Nadja had even had some talks with various teachers and Principal Mendeliev regarding the rambunctious behavior, but the problems always returned in time.

“Exactly, Mama. Plus, M. Agreste held him after school when we were leaving. Here’s hoping he got expelled!” Manon’s optimism was a bit misplaced in vengeance, but Nadja decided to let the girl have her fantasy. “And he seemed kinda jealous when he heard me talking about these sandwiches,” Manon grinned with pride as she plated the croissants and poured homemade dressing on the salad she had crafted. Nadja lit up, hunger in her eyes.

“You’re too good to me, Manon.”

. . . . . . . . . . . .

The croissants were a success in Manon’s book. She may sometimes find out that not every idea was as delicious in execution as it sounded in her head, but lately she had been right more often than wrong. Even Tikki agreed, having eagerly gobbled up the bite Manon offered to her when Nadja’s back was turned during dinner.

After the dishes were cleared, Manon packed the remaining few croissants into a container and slid it into her lunch bag for the next day. It was time to start her homework, she realized with a groan. The teen slung her backpack over her shoulder and marched into her bedroom to begin.

Flicking on the light, Manon was greeted with the comfy, familiar sight of her room. Three of the walls were an ashen grey color, accented by the fourth wall which was almost neon teal. Leaning against the accent wall was her dresser, tall and white with several keepsakes and curios on top such as Ladybug merchandise and little Japanese keychains made to look like miniature foods. A bookshelf stood proudly next to her queen-size bed, full of fiction novels about girls who go on adventures and participation trophies from various sports Manon had played as a child, but never exactly excelled at.

Her desk was triangular in shape, placed in the corner with a large, plush rolling chair at it. The great window beside it gave her a view of the streets below and the buildings surrounding, as the apartment was on the 7th floor. Manon placed herself elegantly in the chair as she tossed her bookbag onto the ground beside her before slumping and groaning at the idea of homework once more. She flicked on her lamp, which was clipped to the bookshelf between the desk and her bed in order to provide light to both.

As Manon flipped open the heavy textbook to read her first homework question, a yellow piece of paper stuck to the page caught her eye. Lifting it to catch the light, Manon read the mysterious note curiously. It seemed to be an address, though Manon didn’t recognize it, and a time, 8 p.m. Her heart leapt into her throat when she saw the initials in the bottom right corner:

“-L.B.”

Her eyes snapped to the clock on her bookshelf instantly. 7:36, it read. Manon’s golden eyes blew wide as she glanced rapidly between the note and the clock, urging her brain to form thoughts. Once she managed to push through her shock, she flipped open her personal laptop on the desk and speedily hopped on a navigation website. The walk time to the address was almost half an hour.

Manon stood before she even finished thinking, twisting her long hair into a braid lightning fast, two strands of cowlicked hair hanging loosely over her forehead as they always did when her hair was pulled back. The frantic girl grabbed her backpack and tore through the apartment to the front door.

“Are you going out, Manon?” Nadja turned around from where she sat on the couch to look at her fleeing daughter.

“Oh! Mom! Ah, yeah! Remy is having…” her mind blanked briefly, “relationship issues? With his frogs! Not Elise. We’re gonna help him! But I gotta go right now so bye!” Manon blew a kiss to her confused mother as she tugged on a light jacket to face the brisk evening ahead, and then she was gone.

Tikki floated along behind Manon down the hallway of the large building as the girl decided the stairs would be faster than the elevator. The kwami looked sheepish.

“Oh, right. I did tell you to check your physics book, didn’t I? Sorry, I got a little distracted by the food.”

#teach me to be brave #mlb #miraculous ladybug #manon chamack #mlb future fic #post-s3 #mlb fanfic #chris lahiffe

[toonstarterz]

BECAUSE I’M NOT POPULAR, I’LL READ WATAMOTE: CHAPTER #163

Ah, summer. The season of no school, bright skies, pools, barbeques, and brief teenage romance.

Okay, so it’s not quite summer vacation yet. But nonetheless, the new season gives way for all sorts of fun shenanigans. None of it ever really enters “drama” territory (as dramatic as this series can be, that is), but as Tomoko’s last year of high school nears the halfway point, we discover that there’s still quite a bit we don’t know about our cast of knuckleheads.  

Chapter 163: Because I’m Not Popular, It’s Summer

I think it can be inferred that Tomoko is not a morning person, is she?

I think it can also be inferred that the once-aspiring NEET Tomoko is not a fan of hot weather. Better soak up that Vitamin D, girl.

Parasol Lady Asuka would like to battle!

Are parasols more prominent in Eastern culture? They’re not too terribly common where I’m from, but I imagine that may be a result of Japan having more of an aversion towards anything that would result in darker skin. Though I can also see it as a sort of fashion opportunity as well.

I believe those were umbrellas you used, Tomoko. But semantics aside, It’s pretty neat to see that Tomoko has finally reached that stage in her life where she can recognize her cringy chuunibyou phase. Long live those days of failing miserably at being a cool anime character.

Remember when Tomoko used to slut-shame the girls in her class? I detect a hint of hypocrisy there...

Gyaru!Asuka has already exploded on the imageboards, I guarantee it.

A part of me wonders why Tomoko grouped Kii-chan and Yuri specifically. They don’t have similar personalities or anything, but I see two possible reasons for it. One, Kii-chan and Yuri both got that mild-mannered, “exotic” look going on. But also, it may who Tomoko subconsciously believes she’ll see the most of over the summer.

We’ll, I mean...yeah. They would. It probably doesn’t help that Tomoko, with her lion’s mane, gives the impression of someone too physically active to care much about grooming. But as much as Tomoko derides the possibility of looking like a “sweaty day laborer”, I can’t deny that it’s not a bad look on her.  

The reason for that should be dead obvious by now.

The thing that amuses me is that Tomoko had no basis to start insinuating that Yuri’s a pervert. She just did, and has latched on to the idea ever since. While no doubt annoying for Yuri (even if it’s true), it’s kind of sweet if you see it as Tomoko wanting to have a shared interest with her.

I’m sure that compared to your freckled, “crazy lesbo” best friend, it isn’t. 

It’s funny how Nemo used to give off an air of someone who’s sexually acknowledgeable (at least to me) by virtue of being semi-popular. Now that we know’s she’s relatively pure, Tomoko will never let her live it down.  

Komiyama really is the most two-dimensional character in the series. And you know what?

It works.

In the education industry, we call it the “Perv Curve”.

Komiyama: Self-explanatory.

Hatsushiba: Anatomically-correct BDSM art must have originated from somewhere.

Katou: Yet even more evidence for the almost-openly perverted girl who casually says “vagina”.

Mako: ...wait, what?  

I’m so used to perfect scores being a badge of honor in Japanese media that it through me for a loop to see it suggested as anything else. Perhaps it’s an issue similar to Home Ec in that it’s not seen as educationally significant and only those really invested in the subject would master it. Either way, how lewd. 

Going back to Mako, I am genuinely shocked. Could Yuri’s oh-so-sweet bestie actually have a dirty side? Just when you think you know a gal! Naturally, she has just enough to shame to be embarrassed when its brought up, and I’m not ready to call out Mako as a pervert just yet. At least she has Yoshida to pat her on the back (ironic given the delinquent is now officially the purest one of the Kyoto Group).  

My Pokémon-obsessed mind can only see them as the Haramaku Elite Four, which, given the segment’s title, is highly unoriginal of me.

I’m 97% sure that Kawagoe’s that old geezer teacher we saw during Tomoko’s suspension. We even got that “strict about textbooks” continuity from way back when Tomoko forgot hers. 

All signs point to Minami’s-Faceless-“Friend”-#1 recognizing someone, most likely Yuri, during this little intersection. Curse you, Nico Tanigawa and your wonderful vagueness.

Nope. It’s not gonna work. Nuh-uh. Absolutely not. You aren’t going to make me feel sympathetic for Minami.

...

...

drat.

All that speculation has finally paid off cause we now have confirmation that Minami did(does?) in fact backbite Tomoko and Yuri. Thank goodness for Tomoko’s mental health that she never knew. But Minami’s got some nerve teasing Yuri when she’s actively Mako’s friend. Even more disturbing if Mako doesn’t realize it...

Between that tiny smile in the last panel and her wanting to tease, it’s pretty much certain that Minami’s-Faceless-“Friend”-#1 is not a pleasant person.

Birds of the same feather truly do flock together.

Okay, I cracked. Minami’s too adorable (and pitiful) right here.

I find it telling that even Minami’s “friends” know she’s a jerk. But if what goes around comes around, then Minami’s-Faceless-“Friend”-#1 might not realize she’s a jerk, too. Are most terrible people aware of their own terribleness? 

I don’t want to correlate jerkiness with irresponsibility but...here we are.

Man, that’s playing dirty. Suzuki is more than likely not that close to Minami, but any decent person wouldn’t just outright say “no” to a request like that. Of course, playing up her own supposed likeability through other’s basic kindness is Minami’s M.O.     

In manga and anime, that sort of haughtiness from cute, snaggletoothed girls is adorable in that “sigh, there she goes again” way.

In reality, it’s just annoying as shit. 

At first glance, Kayo’s just making an off-handed question, but my nit-picking mind says otherwise. I’m not sure how insistently heterosexual/romantic Japanese culture is towards male-female relationships, but would most teens show interest in a friend’s opposite gendered sibling? If say, Miyazaki had a little brother, would Kayo even ask Ucchi a question like that?

My theory is that Kayo is subtly trying to ascertain Ucchi’s sexuality. If the idea of Ucchi being gay for Tomoko is already planted in her head, then Kayo is using Tomoki as a “male version” for comparison. Ucchi’s already admitted to the Kuroki siblings being physically similar, so supposedly if she feels nothing towards Tomoki, then it’s Tomoko’s “femaleness” that attracts her.

This wouldn’t even be half as funny if Ucchi didn’t have an emoji face.

If only Komiyama could see this now...

Or, you know what? Maybe gender is irrelevant and Ucchi just has an indiscriminate gross fetish. 

Nemo’s ultra-realistic thoughts behind her cheery demeanor are always welcome.

For all those times that Tomoko pokes fun at Nemo for wanting to live out a slice-of-life school anime, she’s not exactly innocent either. More and more we see Tomoko trying to invoke those cliche moments, usually with little fear. It’s a rather far cry from when she’d try to pull anime tropes as a means to an end. Now she tries them out just for the sake of having fun, which is much more endearing.

In this particular trope, however, normally you’d have a guy and girl stuck inside, where they’d ultimately become more attracted to each other through the suspension bridge effect.

Of course, that’s assuming the boy and girl aren’t already together. If they are, then storage rooms are usually used as a hiding place to make out, but that obviously would never hap–

Oh.

FUCK.

If memory serves, this is the same couple who were flirting(?) back in the head patting chapter. A whole lot must of went down since then, eh?

Murphy’s Law.

It’s been quite a long time since we’ve had one of Tomoko’s infamous freakouts. And they say this series lost its roots.

A part of me wants to think that Nemo hears Tomoko but is pretending not to just to screw with her, but I don’t think she’d be that cruel. Even if it would be hilarious.

Just how far is your “it”, Tomoko. Making out? Groping? HANDHOLDING!?

What am I saying–she’s totally thinking sex.

It’s interesting to note that Tomoko just assumes that Yuri and Mako have never had a boyfriend. Sure, it may be implied given we’ve never seen them have this discussion before (that we know of), but it’s still pretty presumptuous on Tomoko’s part. My only reasoning is that Tomoko is trying to ally themselves over supposed “undesirability” like many self-deprecating friends do.

First off, I am not at all surprised given Mako’s personality.

What does surprise me is how totally betrayed Mako sounds. I can only assume that it’s a part of Mako’s past that she’d rather not reveal. While I don’t think Yuri meant any harm bringing it up, that kind of miscommunication goes to show that even though they’re best friends, Yuri and Mako don’t always see eye to eye.

Sounds like dating to me. Or rather, sounds like dating between high schoolers. At the risk of sounding like an old-ass millennial, dating between high schoolers rarely last, despite what shoujo manga suggests. Casual dating is exactly that–casual. They’re attracted to the novelty of dating, but once that initial thrill wears off, cue the breakup. 

Side note, I just realized that Yuri loosens up her tie. I love small details like that.

Perhaps I’m reading too much into it, but Mako seems to be suggesting that girls, on the other hand, aren’t as desperate to get boyfriends. While that isn’t necessarily true, I do see that answer as mostly a convenient excuse for Mako, who may simply just not want to be in a relationship right now.

I can see the “Mako is straight/Mako is lesbian(for Yoshida)” War right now...   

Boy, it’s been a while since Tomoko has contemplated her own popularity, let alone try to be more popular. I guess it goes to show that even though Tomoko is more or less satisfied with her current status, she still sees herself below the bar of what constitutes “popular”. She does perpetuate feminine “purity” as an indicator of her societal value, but I’ll let it be–reality is not so kind, after all. 

One of the more prominent questions that Yuri’s fanboys have is “How come someone as pretty as Yuri isn’t more popular with the boys?”

Well, there you go.

In terms of looks, I never thought Yuri was that unattractive in-universe. She’s in that small niche of “plain and generic, but just cute enough that fans feel they could feasibly ask out a girl like her in real life”. So while it's reasonable to think that at least one person would show interest in her, it's Yuri’s personality that ends up putting them off. She probably isn’t ready to commit to the effort of dating and being someone’s girlfriend. nor does Yuri seem that interested to begin with if her texting habits are anything to go by.

I can’t for the life of me remember the name for it, but I believe that there’s this belief in Japan that says everybody (mostly boys) has that brief period in their life where they’re suddenly attractive and people want to date them. I imagine that Tomoko may actually reach that time in life sooner than she thinks.

PTSD TRIGGERED!! For the readers, I mean.

For real, though. What a comeback. Who would have thought that Kosaka, that guy who was introduced in Chapter FIVE would make his grand return? Normally, making a reappearance this late in the game would feel like an asspull, but it works because he was never meant to drastically affect Tomoko’s growth. He was just the spark, the first hint to show that people could actually befriend her. And for that, we salute you, Umbrella Dude.

It’s been, what? About two years since they last spoke, and he still remembers her? Impressive! Then again, I don’t think you're about to forget the girl who gave you a dogeza.

Because I’m Not Popular, I’ll Tell Lies.

These moments where Tomoko is unabashedly a blushing schoolgirl are really precious because she isn’t “perfectly ditzy in that moe sort of way” about it. She gets riled up, sweaty, and unpleasant to watch. Which, ironically, is even more adorable just for how genuine it is.

Yeah, I’m sure the original said “dogeza”, but since there isn’t really a good English equivalent for it, I think “genuflect”...is still an odd choice.

Yuri, who always has her “Tomoko’s BS” meter on high, knows that Tomoko is screwing around when she calls it her “first”. Poor Mako, a now confirmed pervert who still thinks Tomoko is so amazing, thought the girl had popped the guy’s cherry. 

Friendly reminder that eventful summers are not necessarily pleasant summers. Though they could be with the right perspective...

So...Yuri vs. Kii-chan Death Battle when?

The most beautiful part about this ending is that there’s no second-guessing. No “maybe I won’t be lonely” or “I wonder if I’ll be lonely”. Just a very affirmative “I won’t be lonely”. Tomoko fully expects that she’ll be spending time with her friends this summer, and that confidence is more than I ever would’ve expected from Tomoko in previous years.

With summer vacation just over the horizon (don’t want to jump the gun), a medley of both happy, unhappy and delightfully awkward moments are sure to transpire. Just about the only thing Tomoko can plan is the unplanned, and I’ll be sure to get a front-row seat to watch it all.

#watamote #watamote review #chapter 163 #no matter how i look at it it's you guys' fault i'm not popular! #tomoko kuroki #asuka katou #yuri tamura #hina nemoto #mako tanaka #kotomi komiyama #hatsushiba #masaki yoshida #koharu minami #emiri uchi #tomoki kuroki #kosaka #I finally get to use that tag #review

[fire-fira]

Aquaman (2018) is a fucking GEM and here’s why

Buckle up, get your popcorn, get a drink, because my squawking about this film--

--is gonna be long!

Okay, so as anyone who knows me reasonably well or has followed me for my DC stuff can tell you I am a MASSIVE nerd about DC’s Atlantis (thanks in large part to my wonderful and adorable fishy son La’gaan).

(Obligatory shot of this kid’s happy smiling face because I love him and he deserves at least a moment of attention.)

SO--

The Big Things

This film freaking delivered with showing us Atlantis in full lit-up glory, not to mention showing a clear delineation between the lower levels and the upper levels. We didn’t get to see much of the lower levels unfortunately, but the fact that what we did see of it was an old shipwreck says some things. (Which I’ll probably extrapolate on under Social Things.)

I was never left in doubt for even a moment that Arthur and Mera were capable of what they were doing. Both of them are badass beyond words, are goddamn tanks who should NOT be trifled with, and have genuine complexity and chemistry that makes me heavily invested in their relationship. I can understand why they would be drawn together and how their dynamic would work out, and even as that’s going on I am never once left in doubt that both of them are a force of nature who are just as capable of flattening their enemies individually as they would be if they joined forces and fought side by side. Get on their goddamn level, because they are a power couple who can and will destroy you (or make you wish they had) if they deem it necessary.

BLACK. FUCKING. MANTA. I was not prepared for the sheer level of genius badassery from this man. It was one thing finding out that he got his tech from atlanteans (fuck you Orm), but it was something else watching him break it down and rework it to suit his needs while making his own helmet for-- oh yes-- the goddamn eye-lasers. We are very clearly shown that with his first attempt if he’d been wearing the helmet he would have died, but this brilliant badass pretty much just, “Guess I need a bigger helmet,” and then just went ahead and made a second one with everything figured out and sorted so it wouldn’t blow his damn head off any time he used his main weapon! Just HOLY SHIT BLACK MANTA! On only the second try?! What the shit dude?! Granted, you started out as a pirate and then stepped it up to being a supervillain, but HOLY SHIT. I’m surprised he stuck with being just a pirate for as long as he did!

Also, Black Manta’s motivation makes perfect sense. It took one of the more dick-ish moves Arthur’s done (which was also in character for him at that point in the movie), but that act of not saving Black Manta’s dad (especially since with their interactions I’d argue it’s fair to assume that his dad was a good dad to him) feels exactly like it was all that was needed for him to decide he wanted Arthur dead.

 (And RIP me, when I first saw Black Manta’s dad my first thought was ‘Is that Coffeepot Guy from Young Justice?’)

Orm. Hoooolllllllyyyyyy SHIT Orm. Full props to that actor, because he completely sold Purist McDouche-Face Orm for everything he was worth. Even down to the subtle nuances of how easily he let Atlantean slurs fall, the casual arrogance and unnoticed contempt for anyone who wasn’t ‘pure’ (though that specific word didn’t come up) or who he viewed as ‘traitors’, and the fact that this son of a ba’athu-kest had his brother dragged to him unconscious and in chains in his throne room. There was a fucking COLLAR around Arthur’s neck! And then he has the fucking gall later on to essentially say, ‘If you leave now I’ll let you live and we never have to be at odds again, just ignore the fact that I’m going to be committing genocide that’ll probably include your Dad since he’s close to the shore. No hard feelings. ‘Kay?’ and act like it was an act of goddamn mercy or benevolence. Just... OMG. Seriously, just... fuck you Orm. Fuck you so much for engineering a goddamn war. JFC.

And speaking of Arthur’s Dad-- Arthur’s Mom and Dad are PERFECTION. Yeah, we don’t get to see as much of their relationship development as we do with Arthur and Mera, but Tom Curry and Queen Atlanna are the kind of partners you would expect to see epics written about in the old and ancient days. If we’re talking The Odyssey, then they are Odysseus and Penelope with their roughly 20-year absence from each other-- except Atlanna’s Odysseus and Tom’s Penelope. And when they came back together? I was almost crying in the theater. Holy crap. It was just SO MANY FEELS. Not even a moment of doubt that the two of them loved each other, that they loved each other deeply, that they loved each other intensely, and that they loved each other so much that they were willing to wait until the end of time if that’s what it took for them to be reunited. And if I’m not careful I’m going to get misty-eyed over them again.

And can we just appreciate the fact that Tom and Arthur are indigenous? I mean actually? Because dear gods when Tom greeted Arthur and they pressed their foreheads together and breathed I started fucking crying in the theater. I needed that. I needed to see an indigenous superhero with his culture woven in in subtle ways and for it to play out through affection between him and his dad WHO HE ACTUALLY HAS A WONDERFUL RELATIONSHIP WITH-- and fuck I’m crying again. (I’m assuming because Jason Momoa is Maori that that means they’re Maori? I’m not sure though. I hope the specific culture gets mentioned on the bluray whenever it gets released, because I’m forever after this film going with indigenous Arthur and I want to know I’m referring to his people correctly. Indigenous Arthur is in, all other versions of Arthur can go home.) Gods I have so many feels. If Atlanna had showed that she’d adopted small parts of Tom’s culture by doing the forehead thing with Arthur that would have ended me. On the spot. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, 404: Fira not found due to breaking down over all the feels.

Shifting a little (because otherwise I’m grinding to a halt and I have SO much more to get into) let’s talk about the kisegra, the Trench, and the various beasties! Of the kisegra we only really get to see two types-- the Fishermen (merpeople essentially) and the Brine (lobster/crab-centaur-ish people). I’m not going to fault the people working on the movie for showing us only those two types because they busted their asses on this movie and it shows-- hell, even among those kisegra there’s a diversity of coloration and body-build!-- but I was a tiny smidge disappointed not to see more diversity. Maybe something for a later movie. And then there’s the Trench. THE GODDAMN TRENCH. THESE NIGHTMARE FUEL BA’ATHU-KEGEST.

The La’gaan muse in my mind may as well have been screaming bloody murder. The scene with them is THAT MUCH NIGHTMARE FUEL. It’d be one thing if only a couple of them had been on the boat and the ones on the boat were all there were.

AHAHAHAHAHA-- NO. I do not have words for the SWARM of them that we end up seeing on screen. JFC. (Though there is the vague indication that the Trench may???? be some type of kisegra???? in this reality??? Don’t like that implication one bit, especially with how it gets tied to bigoted purist comments. Might just be a thing purists were saying because fucking sea-nazi purists though.)

And can I also say that the Karathen is a damned Queen? Yes, Julie Andrews voiced her. Yes, she was voiced by Mary-goddamn-Poppins. Yes, she is “practically perfect in every way” and will flatten (or eat) a bitch as needed. Lava doesn’t affect her, she is fucking impervious. It’s no wonder why King Atlan wanted her to go with him when he fucked off into permanent self-imposed exile for his GIANT ASS mistake-- because who wouldn’t want to have their bestie to spend the rest of their life hanging out with when said bestie is the ORIGINAL ‘Deep Beast’ and will cheerfully destroy any of your upstart descendants if they try to be as stupid as you were by attempting to repeat your mistakes? (Real talk though, the fact that King Atlan made friends with her in the first place implies that he learned how to let go of almost all the excess pride that got him in trouble in the first place. Congrats for having some character growth and having stuck with what you felt was right my dude.)

SEA. HORSES. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA They were SO DAMN COOL.

And armored sharks. Fucking armored great whites. For when you absolutely, positively, have to kill every mother-fucking thing in the ocean around you.

The Differences From Other Realities

So one of the big things that stuck out to me was the “only the high-born can breathe air” thing. While I do agree that the ability to breathe air, or water, or both probably varies due to genetics and whatnot, in most realities and interpretations I’ve seen the ability to breathe air isn’t something only found in ‘high-born’ individuals. (Case in point, La’gaan. I love him to pieces, but as someone from the Outer Provinces there ain’t no way that boy is ‘high-born’, and yet he can breathe air.) I’m not pointing this out as a “screw up” of any sort on the part of the writers, but more to point out that this is a detail that makes the DCCU unique from other DC universes.

Atlantis-- Something that caught my attention was how Atlantis was spoken to in relation to other kingdoms. We have several kingdoms mentioned in the movie-- the Kingdom of the Fishermen, the Kingdom of the Brine, the Kingdom of the Trench (who tf decided they had a kingdom???), the Kingdom of Xebel-- but the way they’re each spoken about implies that they’re not seen as being part of Atlantis. Whiiiiiich is kind of weird, because Atlantis (in most iterations) is implied to have been a small continent/large island and not just a single city-state. On the other hand there have been (mostly older) renditions where it was a single city-state. Going off of what we see though, I’m inclined to think that what may have happened is that what was that world’s Poseidonis at some point during their history got renamed Atlantis (so kind of like a New York, New York situation; New York City in New York State, Atlantis City in Atlantis).

The number of kingdoms-- This is something I’ve seen vary SO DAMN MUCH. Some realities it’s only one, others have implied as many as 12 (before several were lost), and this reality says that there were 7 and that 3 have been lost. Fun details.

And Xebel being one of the kingdoms? Most renditions I’ve seen have it as a place for criminals or sealed off in its own pocket-dimension. So it being one of the kingdoms is pretty unique.

ARTHUR’S. PARENTS. ARE. ALIVE. HOLY. FUCKING. SHIT.

AND NEITHER OF THEM DIE!!!

And thank you SO MUCH to the writers for completely erasing some of the more questionable things that have been done with Mera and Xebel, and with Black Manta. As far as I know none of the recent comics dip into that uncomfortable written history, but I still couldn’t help but be thankful that none of that awful crap got used.

No use of the word ‘pure’ in regards to the purist rhetoric of some of the characters, but it was so heavily implied that I think it’s safe to assume. Still mentioning it because with everything else going on it was almost weird that it wasn’t mentioned even once.

BORDER PATROL AND WALLS AROUND ATLANTIS. What the actual fuck?! What the fucking fuck?! Who the hell in Arthur’s family thought that was a good idea?! ‘Oh, you’re trying to go up and over the wall and not through the only gate into or out of Atlantis-- ‘cause that’s not asking for trouble AT ALL-- how about... No. Instead we’ll just FUCKING ANNIHILATE YOU WITH GIANT ASS LASERS BECAUSE THAT’S REAL PROPORTIONATE TO THE SITUATION.̓ (Seriously. What the fuck.)

The split between upper and lower levels. I’ve seen splits between inner and outer provinces before with various iterations, but this reality is the first one where I’ve seen an upper-versus-lower-level split in Atlantis.

Arthur being the eldest. Some realities he’s older than Orm, and in other realities Orm is older than him. It’s kind of a toss-up.

Atlanna being ‘sacrificed’ to the Trench. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ATLANTIS?! Granted, the Trench are a recent addition to the Aquaman mythos (a la New52), and it could be argued that for other realities they’re almost a myth, a legend of nightmare stories to warn reckless guppies away from going into open and empty areas away from others where it’d be easier for predators to snap them up and swim away; but for a reality where they’re known to factually exist and for people to be completely okay with SACRIFICING THEIR QUEEN TO THEM... What. THE. FUCK.

The Social Things

Technically I could put this point under Differences From Other Realities, but it has to do with a huge social detail for this movie, so it’s going here. ARRANGED MARRIAGE. I think it’s fair to assume that it may have been a thing in the past in most DC realities, but this reality is the first one I know of where it’s a current thing. Obviously this has HUGE repercussions for how things play out (like Queen Atlanna getting ‘sacrificed’ to the Trench for ‘committing treason’ thanks to having fallen in love with Tom and having Arthur-- WTAF Atlantis?), and it implies a lot more heavy restrictions in Atlantis than even I headcanon-- and I’ve headcanoned some really dark shit based on the crumbs and hints DC has given us over various renditions.

This movie did not sugarcoat or simplify the bigotry in Atlantis. They very clearly conveyed that being bigoted isn’t just “deliberately being mean to someone” and that bigotry is pervasive and can affect damn near everything. In fact they did an artful job at subtly and carefully weaving it into interactions that you might not even notice unless you know what to look for. This includes such “tasteful” (NOT) Atlantean slurs and comments rendered in English as:

- Half-breed (canonically an in-world slur)

- Mongrel (implications similar to ‘half-breed’)

- Savage (I hate this word so GODDAMN MUCH, you have NO fucking idea, my kneejerk reaction to hearing this word is the urge to either deck someone or set something on fire)

- “If that half-breed mongrel wields the trident, then that half-breed mongrel is your king.” (May not be word-for-word exact, but it was said by Mera’s father-- which fuck you Nereus, you purist piece of shit, and fuck you for daring to refer to the man you just told your people to follow by using a goddamn slur.)

- There’s more, but goddamn if I went through it all this thing would get even longer and I’d be screaming even more about Orm and Nereus.

- Though I will say with Arthur being indigenous, that insult of ‘half-breed’ carries WAY more weight than it might otherwise. Like WAY MORE.

Oh yeah! And before I forget! Because fuck that hagfish-sucking purist piece of ba’athu-kest shit ORM! THE ASSHOLE KILLS KING RICOU, KING OF THE FISHERMEN, IN FRONT OF HIS FAMILY BECAUSE HE WAS CALLING ORM ON HIS SHIT AND REFUSING TO GO ALONG WITH HIS WAR.

And then he fucking threatened to kill King Ricou’s partner and daughter if they don’t do what he wants!

Just... FUCK ORM. Fuck his purist bullshit, and fuck his purist bullshit that obviously made him think nothing of killing a kisegra where he actually hesitated over the idea of killing someone ‘pure’. (Think Vulco, to a certain extent, and Nereus when Nereus told him to back down over killing Mera.)

Mera says that people try to get into Atlantis over the wall “all the time.” Um, hi, because that’s not saying anything intense. At all. What it immediately calls to my mind is that it may be a direct hint of kisegra not being seen as citizens in Atlantis and (generally) not allowed in. In fact, in the main crowd scenes during the first fight between Arthur and Orm I only noticed ONE kisegra, and then only because of their tail. I may be wrong, there may have been more that I didn’t notice, but in the brief amount of time there was I tried to scour the shots of the crowd for kisegra and came up empty aside from the one. (Can we say ‘possible hints of that arc in the pre-boot comics where kisegra weren’t citizens until Arthur took the throne’?) It also implies-- if they’re willing to risk getting FUCKING ANNIHILATED BY GIANT ASS LASER-CANNONS to get in-- that things are B A D outside Atlantis.

(Arthur, you poor bastard, you’re walking/swimming into a shit-storm.)

And ‘battles to the death for the throne’???? In a goddamn ARENA?! What kind of fucking hellscape is Atlantis that they’ve had such advanced tech at their disposal for centuries and they’re doing that shit?! (Again, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ATLANTIS?!)

The division between the upper and lower levels. Um... What... the fuck??? Apparently the “low-born” aren’t able to breathe air-- which okay, whatever-- but they apparently have to live with/in wreckage???? Without electricity??? (Obviously the Atlanteans have some form of energy production going. Magic or electricity or both, idek, but that shattered wreck of a ship looked like there wasn’t anything on it or in the area around it that might have cast some light that wasn’t whatever happened to be shining through from higher up.) And apparently without the means to build actual houses???? Great system there for the poor Atlantis. Really.

Arthur, you poor, poor bastard, you’re swimming into a shit-storm.

A gigantic shit-storm.

Arthur, you poor, poor bastard, you’re swimming into SUCH a gigantic shit-storm.

Arthur, you have my deepest sympathies. (Pun not intended.)

I know I said it before, but I’ll say it again: the implications for this world’s Atlantis are way darker than my headcanons have been.

Though this does make me wonder just how much shit Arthur and Mera might get over their relationship and how it came to be (since it obviously wasn’t through “proper traditional procedures”).

Some Other Points I Realized After Getting Some Sleep

Even though we get the sense that everything is headed by kings in Atlantis (HA), we also actually have evidence that Atlantis might not actually go in for surface-world sexist shit.

- Atlanna is clearly Atlan’s descendant, not Orm’s father, otherwise Arthur wouldn’t have been eligible for the throne. Which means the throne was hers (before she was going to be ‘sacrificed’ as a traitor). So that brings up the possibility that things may have played out differently if she’d been found out before Orm was born. (Maybe they wouldn’t have been able to safely ‘get rid of’ her without having someone of her family line available and ready to step in.)

- When Orm kills King Ricou it’s very clearly implied that the throne immediately goes to Ricou’s daughter and not his partner. There is no question or doubt that the princess is immediately in charge of her people’s armies, not even a hint that her gender is a factor in the situation. (It also reinforces the prior thing in the point about Atlanna that family-line seems to be the important factor over everything else for the royal families.)

- Atlanna and Mera both are shown to be highly capable fighters who aren’t to be taken lightly, and though we only really see them being pursued by and fighting against men, there’s not even a moment where any of the atlanteans seem surprised that they’re as capable as they are.

- The Karathen is arguably the biggest badass tank in the entire movie, and yet it’s safe to assume that when King Atlan went into his exile that he cared more about what she was capable of than he cared about the fact that she was the biggest badass woman in the entire ocean. (Assuming the Karathen even has the concept of gender. Pretty sure that’s up for question.)

Chances are high that when Atlanna was ‘sacrificed’ to the Trench, Orm saw his father’s show of harsh and callous ruthlessness and told himself that it was strength, it was admirable, and he wanted to be as much like him as possible. And there’s also the possibility that he had some part of himself deep down somewhere that was absolutely terrified over what his father might do if he ever was or became anything that his father saw fit to ‘destroy’. (Not that it excuses his purist bullshit for even a moment-- purist fucking McDouche-Face Orm can still fucking die in a fire as far as I’m concerned-- but that kind of thing may have added fuel to the fire for his purist bullshit.)

Since it’s very clearly implied that Mera and Orm were raised together, there’s a high chance they were friends as kids. It also means she got to see his increasing asshole-ish-ness, and while she may have missed the friendship they used to have as kids (thank you @tamlins-stories-and-poems for bringing this point up) she also would have known how quickly the switch could be flipped from him caring about her to him deciding she needed to die if he saw her as a ‘traitor’. (Which also explains her deliberate anti-surface comment to him before trying to say that she felt he was going too far.)

I just have to say, in regards to my fishy son La’gaan, he’s the kind of person who doesn’t willingly bow before or submit to anyone unless he feels they’ve earned it. The versions of Mera and Arthur in this movie? They are exactly the sort of people he would be ecstatic to call his Queen and King. They’re the sort of people he would be loyal to and fight with everything he has to defend them-- because they’re both the sort of people to essentially say “fuck you” to social conventions to do the right thing.

With the 7 kingdoms, at least 6 are outright mentioned (unless I’m not remembering the seventh, and even so I’m dubious about the kingdom of the Trench even counting).

- The Remaining 4: The kingdom of Atlantis, The kingdom of Xebel, The kingdom of the Fishermen, and The kingdom of the Brine.

- The ‘lost’ 3: The kingdom of the Deserters (implied to all be dead), The kingdom of the Trench (again, I’m dubious about their claim to the title, but there’s that purist rhetoric about some people having ‘regressed’-- fuck that noise SO much-- but if we put any stock in it then it would imply the kingdom was ‘lost’ because they ‘fell’ so far), and then the third one which may have been mentioned but I don’t recall.

- I just have so many doubts in regard to the Trench having their own kingdom. They’re screwed up nightmare fuel, and claiming they’re one of the Lost Kingdoms feels almost like one of those things that purists thought up as a way to support any claims they have about kisegra being “savage” and all that shit.

And while I’m at it, I fucking love how Orm’s spouting bullshit about how ‘savage’ and ‘barbaric’ kisegra are, and meanwhile the King of the Brine and King Ricou both tell him in no uncertain terms that he’s the one who’s being a violent asshole who needs to back the fuck off.

Really fucking pissed about how Orm killed Ricou and was going to kill the King of the Brine (after he’d already ripped his arm off, fucking asshole Orm).

- Also not thrilled about how after Orm gets ripped away from the King of the Brine, we don’t get to see that king again. I would have liked a moment of him making his way to Arthur to talk. (Maybe something to hope for in a sequel. And hopefully they’ll give him an actual name.)

Also, I appreciate that the one group of kisegra were called fishermen and not fish-men. It’s only something I’ve seen come up in a couple iterations (the animated Young Justice being the main one), but ‘fish head’ is yet another Atlantean slur. Presumably going off of that, things like ‘fish face’, ‘fish lips’, etc.-- while possibly not outright slurs-- could be similar enough to the actual slur to (justifiably) make any kisegra bristle. By going with ‘fishermen’ for that group, it’s pushing away the negative connotations of a possible slur by invoking a term and imagery that implies they are hunters, and therefore shouldn’t be taken lightly. It’s a nice little touch that I’m not sure if the writers intended or not, but I appreciate it all the same.

That said, for all my screaming, I LOVE THIS MOVIE.

#Aquaman #Atlanteans #Arthur Curry #Queen Mera #Black Manta #La'gaan #Lagoon Boy #Orm can die in a fire #long post #meta #updated

[kaciidubs]

Crush (Tom Holland x Reader) {1}

Here it is, as I promised, the first chapter of Crush! Be advised it is pretty long so bear with me, not every chapter will be as long as this one.

Chapter Title: Observation

Summary: Y/n has known Tom ever since she was in middle school so how exactly was she supposed to handle the flutter in her stomach whenever he came around? 

Y/n/n = Your nickname

| Masterlist |

“Remember yourself. Deep inside, you have an observer, a constant neutral witness to your posture, gesture, facial expression, breathing, taste, impressions of light and sound. Don’t leap to interpret. Just be there and observe.” – Jonathan Price, Put That in Writing

It all started in Sophomore year of high school.

The morning bell rang as students filed themselves into the classroom, many of which were chatting with their friends or finding their seats before the lesson began.

Y/n sat near the window, her head bent down as she mindlessly doodled in her open notebook, hoping her classes would fly by so she could go home and have the weekend to herself. It wasn’t that she didn’t like having Mr. Hanson as her calculus teacher, she just didn’t like math in general, but having it with Mr. Hanson made it tolerable.

“Whatcha drawing?”

The sudden cheery voice in her ear caused Y/n to jump, whipping her head around to see her best friend, Kelsi, leaning over her shoulder with a million-dollar smile etched onto her face.

“Jesus, Kelsi! If I have a heart attack I’d rather it be from something deep fried and delicious, not from my best friend!” She gave an exasperated laugh, brushing away the strands of hair that fell in front of her line of view.

“Well, it sucks that you decided to choose me as your ideal human for the rest of your life, now doesn’t it?” Kelsi smiled daringly before quickly snatching the notebook off of Y/n’s desk, ignoring the hushed yelled of protest from the girl on her left.

“Kelsi, what the actual-!”

“Oooh, I see someone has been drawing some headshots of a certain Holland boy in our class,” Kelsi spoke in a sing-song voice, her hazel eyes scanning quickly over the three scattered drawings strewn across the otherwise math filled paper.

Y/n huffed out a puff of air, getting out of her chair to snatch the notebook back, “Oh, I am so throwing away your half-finished tub of Mint Chocolate Chip when I get home unless you give me my notebook, you swiper!”

In almost an instant Kelsi froze, her eyes snapping to Y/n’s e/c ones, “You wouldn’t dare.”

Y/n glared back, her stare as hard as steel, “I would, McDarren, now give it!”

There was a moment of silence between the two before Kelsi sighed and reluctantly gave the notebook back to her friend. “You know, you should just tell him you like him! You’ve known him since middle school, you know.”

“Ha, and what, be forced to live with the fact that he doesn’t feel the same way? Nice try, but I’d rather lay low; I mean, it’s only high school, I’d rather stick with our friendship.”

She shifted her gaze to her notebook, carefully smoothing out the page before a pair of familiar voices caught her attention.

“I almost had it down too, you should have seen me, mate!”

Tom and Harrison walked through the door, both laughing cheerfully as they headed for their seats which were, ironically, in front of Kelsi and Y/n, respectively. Though they were walking relatively normal, for Y/n it felt as if time slowed as she stared at Tom; his brown hair styled into his normal fluffy curls and the same gorgeous smile reaching his eyes, showing that it was truly genuine.

She would have continued to stare if it weren’t for something small and hard hitting the side of her face, causing her to flinch and instantly lock eyes with Kelsi, who had an innocent smile on her face.

Y/n gave her an ‘I know you did that’ glare, making a mental note to send her a picture of her beloved ice cream hovering over the trash once she got home.

“Hey Y/n, Kelsi,” Harrison called as he and Tom reached their seats, Tom nodding along as a greeting.

“Hi Harrison,” Y/n smiled before feeling her face heat up in anticipation, “H-Hi Tom.” She instantly cursed herself as soon as she stuttered, already feeling as if her entire world was collapsing in on her.

“Hello boys! Ready for today’s quiz?” Kelsi quickly shifted the attention to her, shooting Y/n a knowing look before engaging in conversation with the two boys.

As they talked Y/n snuck a few glances at Tom, her heart catching each time she would lock eyes or see him smile or his eyes sparkle with the beauty of the stars. She longed to go back to the years when looking at him didn’t cause her heart to do flips and her mind to buzz with whether she looked presentable or not. It was only high school, she reminded herself. There’s no reason to get caught up in a high school crush.

Once Junior year hit it seemed like everyone hit a shift; puberty was at it’s prime for almost everyone, people started thinking of their futures and what they wanted to be, school spirit was at an all time high, and the idea of relationships becoming a serious deal started to become apparent.

“And that’s how I ended up crying in the ice cream isle of the grocery store,” Y/n spoke, a knowing smile on her face as Kelsi laughed, hugging her sides in pain as she doubled over.

“Y-You did?! Oh, I feel so bad! Sucks that Harrison is still on that family vacation of his, I’m sure it would have been priceless to have the both of them freaking out.” She continued to laugh, albeit quieter than before as she leaned against the cobalt blue lockers.

“Yeah, Tom felt so bad too, but I can’t blame him for it, I told him I get emotional on my period which, now that I think about it, should be considered weird to share with one of your male best friends.” She shrugged as she shoved another textbook into the cramped locker, decorated with pictures of he friends and little reminder notes for herself.

“Oh, are you telling the ice cream story?” Tom’s voice came out of nowhere as he walked up behind Y/n, resting his right hand against the strap of his backpack that was slung over his shoulder.

She felt her face warm almost instantly at his voice, a wave of goosebumps flowing over her skin. “Yeah, I was, I couldn’t get enough of describing your face, you were so scared! You were all like ‘Oh, please don’t cry! I-I’m sure they have chocolate fudge brownie somewhere else!’” She mocked his voice by dropping hers as low as she could before Tom pinched her cheek. “Hey!”

“I don’t sound like that, Y/n/n.”

Before Y/n could get a rebuttal in, a group of three girls walked by, giggling loudly before one with blonde hair turned her head towards Tom, “Hey, Tom!” Her tone was so obviously flirty that Y/n and Kelsi cringed, thought Tom was blissfully oblivious.

“Hey.” He gave them a short wave, causing all three girls to giggle once more as they continued to walk away.

“Hey, Tom!” Kelsi mimicked, making Y/n laugh as she shut her locker.

“If they needed to be more obvious they could have just written ‘I’m single’ across their foreheads.” Y/n sighed, looking up to face a dumbfounded Tom.

“What are you guys talking about?”

Y/n and Kelsi stared at him with shocked looks before turning to each other with arched eyebrows, before snickering with knowing sighs.

“What?”

“Tom,” Y/n started, adjusting her bookbag on her back, “Those girls who just walked by? They’re into you.”

“So very, blatantly, into you.” Kelsi finished, hiking her bookbag onto her shoulder.

“No they’re not.” Tom scoffed, running a hand through his hair as he tried to call their bluff.

“Kelsi, care to demonstrate?” Y/n mused, knowing how her friend was at flirting.

“I’d be honored to, I was gonna start heading to class anyways.”

The duo watched as Kelsi casually walked down the hall before stopping in front of two guys talking a few lockers down, obvious jocks by the sports jackets they wore. She twisted her hair and visibly giggled then walked off, flirtatiously waving at the two before disappearing around the corner.

“That’s basically what they did, Tom.” Y/n smirked, pushing herself off of her locker as she and Tom began to walk to their class.

“Okay, well, like you said, it was too obvious! What if they’re just doing it to do it? What would you do if you were to flirt with me?”

She internally froze at his words, her heart beating hard against her ribcage. “I-I mean I wouldn’t, because we’re best friends, but-but if I did, I would…” Her conscience was screaming at this point, all the possible alarms telling her to stop while she’s ahead, to pump the breaks and proceed with caution.

“If I were to flirt with you I’d,” She took a deep breath, “I’d compliment you on your hair, because let’s be honest, the curls are a total chick magnet, then I would constantly look from your eyes then to the floor or somewhere else, because eye contact is weird; just shit like that.” She huffed, trying to compose herself and hoping that answered his question fully.

Tom stayed silent for a moment, processing her words before slowly nodding along, “Okay, I suppose that makes sense.”

She internally sighed, mentally kicking herself for actually pulling that stunt. Don’t get caught up! Her conscience seemed to scream as they continued their way to class, the first bell ringing through the crowded halls.

But alas, she did get caught up, and as Senior year came people grew up, friendships changed, people aged, and feelings advanced into a broader spectrum.

“Kelsi, you promised me we would be going to Prom together! Bestie-Prom takeover, remember?” Y/n groaned, trying to get the attention of her best friend who was currently texting away on her phone.

The year was nearly over and it felt like everything was between a haze of still being high school kids and budding adults who needed to take charge of their lives.

“Yeah but that was before Gordon told me he was going to be back in time for prom! I’m sorry Y/n/n, can’t you just go with Tom or Harrison?”

“No, I can’t Kels! Harrison is going with some cheerleader and Tom is going with Lydia.” As Y/n spoke her name her voice dripped with venom, pure hatred for the rude, popular red head that Tom somehow found himself going to prom with. “Besides, I would ask Aniyah but she’s going to her girlfriend’s prom instead, and Malia isn’t even going, she’s touring colleges.”

“Well, I’m sorry but I can’t change it, Gordon already bought us tickets and picked the seats. I wish I could help you but I have to go meet up with Gordon before next class. I’ll text you later.” Kelsi hastily spoke, gathering her bookbag and tray before rushing off to the trash bin.

Y/n sighed, stabbing absentmindedly at her lunch before pushing it away. “Who needs prom anyways, right? Biggest part of your high school career and all of your friends are taken.” She mumbled, feeling tears well behind her eyes as she resting her head on her arms, wishing the bell would ring so she could go back to class.

“Hey, Haz, do you see something wrong with this scene?” Tom’s voice spoke from behind her, causing her to silently curse herself.

“Yeah, I do! Seems like a certain [height] person of ours isn’t doing too well.” Harrison’s voice seemed closer before Y/n felt a poke on the top of her head, causing her to groan.

“Well, you know what time it is then.”

Without speaking another word, the two boys sat on either side of Y/n before leaning against her, wrapping one arm each around her back.

“Fuck off.” Y/n mumbled, feeling the weight of them shift against her arms.

“Not until you tell us what’s wrong!” Harrison spoke in a sing-song voice near her ear, a smile evident on his face through his voice.

“I don’t need your bullshit, guys.”

“Y/n/n…” Tom scolded, causing her to mentally shrink in on herself, “What’s wrong? We don’t like seeing our girl down so, if we have to fight someone-”

“-Consider it done.” Harrison finished, squeezing her tightly for a second.

“I don’t think it’s possible for you to fight yourselves.” She sighed, lifting her head and resting her chin on her hands, staring off into nothingness.

“It was something we did?” Tom questioned, his eyebrows furrowing together as he studied the side of her face.

“No, at least not on purpose, it’s just,” Y/n sighed, closing her eyes so she could gather her words, “Kelsi found out that Gordon is coming back from his college tour in time for prom so she’s going with him instead of with me like she said, and I get it, he’s her boyfriend and all but she promised me that we would go and I’m just a bit mad because I have no one to go with now! You guys have dates and my other friends are either occupied or not going!”

She took a moment to catch her breath, rubbing her hands across her face before gasping, “A-And don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with going to prom alone or anything but I just wanted that chance of being given a corsage and taking pictures with my closest friends, or even my boyfriend, but as we all know I’m as single as it gets now.”

Harrison and Tom frowned at their friend’s disposition, hugging her tighter as she sighed sadly.

“I’m sorry to hear that Kelsi did that to you, even when she found out Gordon was coming back in time she still should have kept the plans you two had.” Harrison spoke comfortingly, rubbing her back as he tried to think of a way to help.

“Yeah, besides, I’m sure Harrison and I can find a way to help you out, probably make a few calls?” Tom offered, looking over to Harrison with a hopeful gaze.

“For sure, I can always ask Zach, he’s a cool guy, well-mannered and everything!” Harrison beamed, thinking of his friend who was currently in class.

“Guys, please-.”

“How about Jason? He’s kind of a party animal so I guess if you’re looking to have a good time at prom then-.” Tom listed, shifting his gaze to the lunch table where Jason sat.

“No, really, I-.”

“Trent isn’t all that good, but if you’re looking for some real nice prom pictures-.”

“Guys!” Y/n huffed, planting her palms on the table as she sat up, knocking their arms off of her back. “I… It’ll be fine. I’ll just go by myself and see you guys there. It’s not that big of a deal, now, if you’ll excuse me.” As she stood up the lunch bell rang, only giving her more of a purpose to leave the cafeteria and her two best friends.

The day of prom night came faster than Y/n had hoped as she nervously flipped the small ticket in her finely manicured nails; her eyes closed as she was getting her makeup and hair done before putting her dress on.

“Is Kelsi going to come by or will we be going to her house?” Her [parent] asked eagerly, watching as their baby girl was getting ready for the night of her life.

“No, [parent], She- uh, Gordon surprised her and showed up just in time for prom, so they’re going together. I insisted.” Y/n spoke carefully, not wanting to mess up the makeup artist.

“Oh, that’s so kind of you sweetie! Here, let me get your dress so you can put it on once they finish.” Her [parent] quickly rushed out of the room, leaving Y/n with her thoughts and the company of the stylist and makeup artist.

A half hour later, Y/n was helped into her dress by her [parent], holding her [hairstyle] out of the way so her [parent] could zip the dress up in the back.

“Oh, sweetie!” Her [parent] gasped, tears gathering in their eyes as they gazed lovingly at their daughter, “I have to go get the camera! You look so beautiful!”

Y/n smiled bashfully, nodding to her [parent] before turning to look at her self in her mirror. She gasped slightly, admiring the beautifully done makeup and luscious hairstyle that her hair was done up in. Her e/c eyes scanned over the design of her dress, her hands slowly running down the sides of her body before catching a glimpse of her shoes underneath. “Holy shit.”

Her family gathered in the living room, taking photos and some shedding some tears, relishing in the heartfelt moment before the doorbell rang. Y/n’s [parent] walked off to answer the door and a few minutes she returned, her smile ten times bigger than it was before.

“Y/n, honey, there are some people who want to see you.”

Y/n turned, her eyes widening once she saw Tom and Harrison standing side by side behind her mother, Tom in a simple, yet stunning, black suit, while Harrison wore an intricately designed navy blue suit of his own.

“Guys!” She nearly yelled, a laugh escaping her lips as she fanned her face, “You guys are gonna make me cry, oh my god!”

Her family collectively laughed and awed as she walked over to pull both of them in for a group hug.

“You look amazing,” Harrison smiled widely as he squeezed her arm.

“Absolutely stunning,” Tom added, taking a moment to take in her appearance again.

“Yeah, and you two are totally rocking the whole suit look, Harrison you look like you belong in a magazine!”

“I try, I try,” He beamed, showing off his suit before laughing.

“Oh, and before we forget,” Tom moved his hand from behind his back to hold out a beautiful corsage that perfectly matched the color of her dress, “You always have to have the corsage.” He beaconed for her to hold out her arm, sliding the corsage over her hand while cameras flashed.

Y/n felt her face heat up at the attention, her heart hammering within her chest when he finally looked up at her with a smile. “O-Okay, lets get some photos so you guys won’t be late to get your dates!”

Later that night, after photos, arriving to prom, dancing, eating, and more photos, Y/n felt extremely thankful for her two best friends, even forgiving Kelsi after they spoke when the party was over.

Then, graduation came, and in the middle of the summer Kelsi moved out to the states, going to college on a full-ride scholarship and begging Y/n to come along with her, hoping to continue the bond they had. As much as it pained her, Y/n didn’t have much of a choice, not being able to move because of the cost, which caused them to have a falling out.

The way Kelsi saw it, it was a situation of ‘if you aren’t there with me physically then you might as well not be there at all’, and that’s what happened.

After doing a few short films and performances, Tom ended up striking a deal to move out to L.A to pursue his dream of acting with the support of his family and best friend, who promised to take turns travelling out to visit and accompany him to certain events.

Though his family took the news extremely well, the moment he told Y/n was the day she felt her world come tumbling down; the experience of losing one of her best friends to distance then having to give her closest friend away to the same cause eating her up inside.

He promised to spend whatever time he had left before having to leave and though there were moments of deep sadness and anguish over the move, he promised to keep in contact any way he could, vowing that their friendship could surpass any distance put between them.

But, once moving day came and went, Y/n’s heart didn’t agree to the deal as she thought it would, as she cried for three days after Tom left for L.A. Though, time passed she earned herself a job at a café and restaurant near her parent’s house, saving money to eventually get her own apartment while doing online courses for university.

Ding, Ding!

The soft chime of the bell snapped Y/n from her thoughts, sliding a thick packet to her side as she put on a smile to greet the customers who walked to the register.

“Hello! What can I get for you?” She spoke subconsciously, the statement etched into her precognitive set of sentences out of habit of working at the café for so long.

“How about a non-stressed Y/n and a genuine smile, yeah?” Harrison’s cheeky voice filled the atmosphere as he leaned against the counter, his cerulean blue eyes holding a playful glimmer behind them.

Y/n smiled wider, rolling her e/c eyes as she brought the packet back in front of her, “Yeah, sure, and to get that you’ll just have to convince my professor to give me an A on this essay I have yet to finish.” The packet held numerous red ink marks, self-annotated edits and revisions made by herself while she was stuck behind the counter for the day.

“Okay, well, I can’t do that but I can tell you something that will make your day a hundred times better!”

“And I’m judging by the pause you want some sort of bribe for the information, hm?”

“Information isn’t always free, love.”

Rolling her eyes again she placed her palms flat on the polished wood counter, levelling her face to his. “One cupcake.”

“Three.”

“Two.”

“Three.”

“Two and a chocolate chip cookie.” She raised her eyebrow, knowing he wouldn’t back down from that deal, “Final offer.”

Harrison pondered the deal for a moment, stroking his chin and humming is if to fake her out, “Deal.”

He stuck out his hand and Y/n took it graciously, before squeezing it tightly, “Now, spill the info before you get the reward.”

“Ow! Ow! Okay, please!” He pried his slightly aching hand from her semi-death grip, holding it closely to his chest, “Tom’s coming back in a month!”

Her heart stopped once she processed his sentence.

Tom’s coming back in a month.

Tom’s. Coming. Back. In. A. Month.

“Is… Is he really?”

“Yeah, he confirmed it with everyone, after they finish interviews and auditions for other movies he’s being cast in he’ll be coming back home,” Harrison spoke with a smile, raising his eyebrows in a suggestive manner, “And we all know how much you’ve missed him.”

Y/n blushed instantly, muttering a quick ‘Shut up’ before tasking herself to get his reward for the information, which wasn’t an issue since David, the owner, loved her, and for as long as she’s been there he let her do pretty much anything.

“Oh, come on Y/n/n, you really think I haven’t caught on by now? You were showing some serious heart eyes back in high school, and then after he left you wouldn’t leave your room for four days until we had to call him to convince you that it wouldn’t be too bad while he was gone!”

“Harrison, that was four years ago, it’s nothing now, I just missed my best friend.”

Harrison sat up, leaning his hip against the counter, “You don’t have to lie to me, I can tell by the blush on your face you still have feelings,” He cocked his head to the side, attempting to get a better glimpse at her turned down face.

Y/n sighed dejectedly, closing the container for the cupcakes with a soft shake of her head, “It’s nothing, okay? Just leave it alone.”

She turned to place the container on the counter, looking up to meet Harrison’s puppy-dog pout.

“Fine, if you don’t want to talk about it then we won’t, I just have one question.” The h/c haired girl tilted her head, allowing Harrison to continue, “How many cupcakes have you had this morning, because they’re usually always fully stocked and I can tell three are missing!”

Harrison’s laugh warmed Y/n’s heart as she giggled as well, appreciating the change in topic. “Hey, I’ve been here since 8 in the morning, you can’t judge me!”

“Yeah, but cupcakes that early?”

“Harrison, ‘Any cupcake consumed before 9AM is, technically, a muffin.’, Brian P. Cleary,” She spoke happily, laughing as he groaned dramatically at her words.

“Oh, you know I hate it when you go all quote-savvy on me!”

Y/n continued to laugh, though his words continued to swirl in the back of her mind.

I can tell…you still have feelings.

Maybe… But it wasn’t enough for her to risk her friendship over a fleeting emotion.

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[dumb-beau]

today i'm having feelings about hbo cas.

they're allowed to be otherworldly and unsettling. they don't blink until dean points out how freaky it is, and then they blink too much until dean tells them how distracting it is.

that first scene where we meet them, the audience doesn't see the shadow of cas's wings; the camera cuts to dean as he crumples to the floor and just fucking vomits from the horror of just a glimpse of cas's true self.

cas is allowed multiple vessels - the first change is after raphael explodes them the first time. every time they're 'killed' by something they come back looking different.

they spout little facts about the brothers all the time, casually mentioning more than once that they've been watching the winchesters their whole lives and making everyone supremely uncomfortable.

they move carefully, but still break things often, always unsure of the amount of force needed for things, sometimes not using enough force to, say, open a door, and then using far too much force and ripping the door right off its hinges. dean never lets cas open or close the impala's doors, and everyone assume he's being, like, a gentleman or something getting the door for cas every time.

cas still falls in love with dean, because i've always seen that in their interactions, but dammit cas is allowed to be ace and stay ace even during the times they have no grace! ace cas rights!! (he and meg still flirt though i fuckin love megstiel you can take it from my cold dead hands.) anyway hbo cas is a lot more honest about being in love with dean because why wouldn't they be?? and at first dean is uncomfy with it but eventually realises cas doesn't want anything from him but his companionship. let these guys be best friends please. let dean be nice to cas!!!!! and ugh the impact of losing someone who loves dean just because, without asking anything in return? let dean absolutely bawl over losing his best friend, just, let the man cry over castiel!!!!!!!!

cas is controlled and efficient in fights until one of the boys is in danger and then he's absolutely feral. yes this includes sam too they're besties and aNOTHER thing gimme more sam and cas bonding you absolute bastards.

anyway i absolutely adore cas and that's that on that.

#look i don't ship destiel exactly but i have always believed cas is in love with dean #HOWEVER do not come at me if you have a problem with wincest #you will not find a friend in me if you're hardcore destiel #i ship more than one incest ship fair warning my dudes don't talk to me if you don't like that kay thanks love you #spn #hbo spn #cas

[harmonizedheroine]

Winter2017

I. Confused - Jan2

Here I am, sitting at the mesmerizing cliffs of dover pretending that I am making decisions that are worthwhile, writing words that I thought could offer me solace. It is my last year here and I fear that there is no clarity near, like I will always be drowning in the same relentless cycle of malcontent.

It’s almost choking me at this point, the thickness of the grime from that past year inching up towards my cranium, threatening to fill up my brain with its thoughtless dark.

But, at the stroke of midnight all of that passed. The silent orb of brightness escaped the shadows and caressed my face… “You’re so beautiful.” I melt under rays of endless summer that promise me joy, joy and nothing more.

I remember, there was a cloudy shine awaiting me outside, but I shouldn’t have left. What if I missed it. The chance, the opportunity, the perfect one.

But, there’s a whole year. A whole year to figure out how I can near my inevitable bliss because I know one day I can reach it. I can achieve happiness and I am willing to persevere whatever obstacles I must in order to do so.

“This is my year,” they all say each year. But, I mean it. This is the year that I take control of my life because fate is passing. I have to do something because if I don’t, who will?

So, this is me…and these are the ramblings of a mad woman. I can’t wait to spend the next year with you and I hope this post grows as long as….the Nile River.

II. Ability - Jan5

I want to be able to…

reach the moon with only the help of one balloon,

break through the walls with a single push…pop,

make my childhood last as long as infinity

time and record the blissful surrender into calamity

witness the dark and passionate affair with a soul that of Dorian’s

worry even the smallest person passing me by

capture the attention of an untamed lion with a gaze

because god only knows what I’d be without you.

III. Weirdo - Jan7

Dude, so apparently it’s #wastemytime2k17 because I have been scammed, yet again. Honestly, it would have been dope if Joanne the Scammer herself had scammed me, but alas...t’was not. So, basically, Nate is over which is a rough situation for me to be in, having had liked him and spent a lot of time with him for several months. I still have his bracelet. He gave me literally $170 worth of Vans and I can’t return a pair because I wore it BUT I plan on returning the other pair because it just feels wrong.

He literally ripped my heart out. I drove to Megan’s after I made up a very smooth excuse that my mom needed me home. It was 2am. It made sense. I just didn’t wanna cry in front him...So, I just dipped. Like...it was just a boozy night. What the heckaroons, 2017 is MY year. People have to stop trying to ruin my year. But, you see, that only ruined my week. I’ll get over it. No one is worth my year. And, in the coming months, I will forget all about it and him. I just need a little bit of time!

Donald Glover’s Weirdo is one of the best one-hour stand-up’s I’ve ever seen. It is insanely funny and I love Donald Glover because he is an absolute gem. It totally repaired my night. And I found out that I’m the bomb. Like what an L for Nate. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be. I mean...he doesn’t like Kanye which is like fine whatever I guess I get it. But, then he said he doesn’t like Frank Ocean because he’s too mainstream. I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEN. Also, he’s not into Star Wars???  I was shook. 

I found out several things from my time with Nathan. If a boy says he doesn’t like the major things that I like....AKA FRANK FREAKING OCEAN (like who doesn’t like him), then that means that something is up. I also learned that I can be like really nice sometimes or...you know what I’m saying? Like I can be really really nice when people are really really nice to me. Reciprocation was a big takeaway word from this lesson. I honestly think that it ended because cuffing szn has officially concluded. Onto living life to the fullest. This is my year. And I can’t wait to makeout with cute college boys at parties again (haha kidding, but at the same time let me LIVE, mom).

IV. Quirky - Jan11

frick

frickity 

frack goes the click clack

goon

fiend

shoots patoots

any form of the word baboon

baboon

baboonery

to be continued….

V. Takeaway - Jan12

I figured from a few posts ago that I learned something or, you know, a lesson from each of the boys that I’ve spent time with, whether short or long or recurring like Megan Fox on New Girl...it’s all a struggle. But, let’s take it from the start!

Ben - Cool cat. All I can take away from this is that we were both fetuses and it was the longest relationship that I’ve ever been in (1 year I think??), yet it wasn’t even one lol. But, he’s the bomb and we’re still really good friends. I guess I can take away from this that exes CAN be besties.

Nick - My on-and-off boyfriend. We’re currently off, obviously, and hopefully forever. I learned from this kiddo that I love funny guys, they’re the best. I was really sad to see junior Nick turn into a douchebag compared to the Nick I knew just a few years before. I learned that I don’t deserved to be cheated on and that boys can be boozy. It was just ratchet. And I’m dope. Also, friends with benefits works only in the rarest of occasions and please don’t enter that sort of relationship with you EX. Bad idea, buddy.

Ethan - He spent more time with video games then paying attention to me. Obviously, the lesson here is that that is completely dumb and I’m dope. Except, it also showed that drummers are my kryptonite (reference one of my two biggest high school crushes: Matthew Butler). But, yeah, I love video games and I can totally play and actually enjoy that shit because...they’re dope. But, it was just boozy.

Ted - Okay, this is the first boy to take me out on dates and it was literally so adorable and I loved how much effort he put into things because he liked me. We went to the city and the zoo and you know all of this cute shit. But, it was supposed to be casual. He was perfect and amazing, but it was destined to end. I learned that you can’t make someone like you. The whole time, I thought that he would maybe realize that he would want to actually be with me. FALSE. But, it’s okay. Because I still enjoyed my time with him.

Yash - Yeah, it was fun. But, I hate boys that love drama. I know he kept saying that he hates drama, but I literally told one person about Yash and he flipped shit and it wasn’t cute. Also, after a while, he stopped being all cute and nice. Not cute. I learned that assholes are never fun, to not take people’s shit, and that I deserve like waaay better lol. 

Nate - He was absolutely too nice to me and he treated me fantastically. Totally sweet and caring and compassionate and kind. But, that can only amount to so much. That could only come to be so much, though, you know? From my last post about him, I could say that I learned liking a few of my major likes like Frank Ocean are kind of important. I want to talk to someone about everything, even like intellectual stuff. He was absolutely too good to me, but in the end I wasn’t enough. Which is okay because I’m enough for myself. I learned that nice guys definitely don’t finish last, that I’m a great girlfriend, and that I deserved someone who goes to the third floor (future me: I hope you remember what this means lol. I DESERVE SOMEONE WHO GOES TO THE THIRD FREAKING FLOOR, IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR.

VI. Enough - Jan14

IM SORRY FOR ALL OF THE RELATIONSHIP POSTS... my love life is boozy and I promise to fill this szn-long post with more fulfilling and relevant life stories and shiz because this relationship drama is getting boring.

my relationships have all ended with one word in mind looming over me for weeks on end afterwards: enough.

i feel like i’m never enough. i get that boys like me, maybe even a lot do/could. but they never like me enough. i just want someone to care about me enough to not cheat and actively tell themselves that they would never cheat because…in all honesty, i think i’m a fairly good person. it’s not like im an awful girlfriend or even an awful person. you know…i get that people can “like” me, but they just don’t like me enough…enough to want to keep me in a real relationship, to try. because i try. i always try and lose myself to trying to make people happy, whether it’s with relationships or even just my friendships. i always exert all of my energy and find none of it reciprocated. and i guess im not really complaining, it just sucks you know?

all starts with nick. im not enough for him to stay loyal (these hoes aint loyal). for ted, i wasn’t enough for him to keep once northwestern started. for yash i wasnt enough for him to not eventually treat me like trash, straight up. for nate, i wasn’t enough to put his faith in, until college and maybe even further.

like i hate getting my hopes up, waiting for something that would never happen, and just trying so hard to care about people who couldn’t even…i dont know. its just…im tired. im so so tired and so discouraged and boys keep treating me like trash and ugh.

it might sound dumb or whatever, but i feel like i deserve more than this at least. because im enough for myself and that’s for sure. so if im not enough for other people, then that’s on them. seriously.

what just tears me apart is the whole nate thing right now. like yeah for sure im talking to danny right now and he’s an absolute dreamboat, but the whole nate situation still manages to upset me, you know? like he’s literally pretending that i don’t exist. it’s like we don’t know eachother. and he doesn’t wanna date me because college. well yeah, but that’s in 7-8 months. Also…I’m not the type of person to cheat or leave someone as soon as I see the first cute person at college. I feel like I would care more than that. rough. yet another case to validate the fact that nothing ever goes.

so here i am now, going back to my fall go-to of “casual” things with people. because i don’t want to cry over a guy again. freaking 2017 is my year. im over it. lmao. sorry i just needed to rant, please don’t read this :/

VI. Scammed - Jan20

There has been an update. 

I’ve been informed by Megan and Max, two excellent sources, that I was, in fact, scammed by Nathaniel. So, it turns out that he kind of used me to see if he could get over Corey. Throughout the two-three months, I was actually just part of a social, personal-discovery-esque experiment. A lab rat, of sorts. Which is absolutely bogus, in my humble opinion. 

So, right after he broke things off with me, he goes straight to Corey, pours his heart out to her, says he still loves her, and they kiss. Fast forward to him bringing her to the opening night of my show, the school musical which he damn well knew I was in. I didn’t know about the whole “Still In Love With Corey” thing at the time, so I freaked out to Megan and was super down about what I was hypothesizing was them being back together. 

So quick for him to jump the boat. Anyways, after that, I heard that Corey told him she doesn’t want to be in a relationship again. Sucks for Nate, truly. And I really have 0% desire to be petty about this and talk about how karma had it coming for him. Because I don’t believe that.

Out of all people, I would understand very well the situation he was in. To like someone, but still be in love with the last one. I think I was just super unlucky to be caught in the crossfire of something happening. It’s kind of like Ross’ girlfriends throughout the show. Everyone knew he would end up with Rachel because he always loved Rachel and those poor girls in between were just unlucky people caught in the crossfire. Yeah, he liked them. But, Rachel was always the one. I’m not Nate’s Rachel and that is absolutely fine with me. 

If I think about it, in the long run, it wouldn’t have worked either. He doesn’t know anything about politics and I love talking about politics. He hates Frank Ocean, Chance the Rapper, Kanye, and literally just everyone that I like but listens to heavy metal all the time because it has amazing drums YET he doesn’t like rock and alternative rock because???? He doesn’t go to the third floor. And he’s not planning to go to college and I am. I want someone who can care about me, make me laugh, and who I can talk to about anything. And it just wasn’t there with Nate. 

(also, megan and max said it wouldn’t have worked out anyways because he’s a virgo and i’m an aquarius. sounds like bullshit, but i read up on it and it all was so real so i guess that theory checks out)

What I’m really just upset about is that I had to be the pawn in this. I wish I was just left out, that I never had my feelings hurt. You know what? I actually take that back. I wish that he told me the truth when he broke it off. You know? “I really like you, but I think I’m still in love with Corey and I’d hate to hurt you while I’m still confused and going through this,” would have been a lovely approach at breaking it to me. I wish you told me this BEFORE I wasn’t New Years hanging out with you :/ Well, whatever. New year, new me (minus Nate!)

VII. Questioning - Jan22

I just don’t know where I stand in the world right now.

I’m sitting here, on my couch, crying more than I have in a long time because I am so afraid that my parents won’t love me no matter what.

I was born into a faith, a life which was chosen and destined for me. Roman Catholicism would be my religion and that was the final word. As I grew up, with the influence of my environment and the people that I’ve come across throughout my years, I’ve slowly but surely come closer to finding who I am. And, with that, comes doubt. For a really long time now I’ve had so much doubt in my religion and so many questions and...it strikes me. What is the purpose of it all? I understand the reach it has for certain people; I understand the bond and importance of this religion and its impact on so many lives. But, I just don’t know if I believe in it all. I mean, of course, I think I do. But, was I just conditioned to think that way? Is this all the culmination of my whole life being surrounded and pushed into this lifestyle? I’m so lost and have so many questions.

Less than twenty minutes ago, I asked my parents if I could skip church this week to study. I have so much homework because of the musical and I still have a shift pretty soon. Of course, my dad freaks out.

I understand that I have amazing parents who are completely not strict on me at all and I am so thankful for my freedom that’s been allotted to me. But, what struck me was when I almost made my dad cry when I said that I feel no spiritual connection in going to church anymore. “This isn’t how we raised you,” he said, voice painfully cracking. He walked away to get some water. I just didn’t know what to say. Because it was true. It was the full disclosure: I don’t understand why church is important for me to prove my faith. Why is there more importance placed on this one hour of the week then actively trying to spend time with me or get to know me.

I want my parents to know me: know what music I like and how much I love it, know my political views and why and just take time to understand instead of debate against it. I want to have dinner with my parents again because I just have not been home this entire year. I study so hard and I just...I’m missing part of myself to this.

What struck me during my tear-driven talk with my parents was when my dad said something about “non-negotiable” and I was hurt. “Religion is non-negotiable?” I’ve known for years now that I wasn’t planning on attending church in college, but I’ve never said it out loud.

I think that before you further your spiritual connection at things like church and mass, you have to establish your connections here on Earth. Show activism in your connections to people, show you care, and strengthen that before you try and “prove” it in a setting like church. I think that one hour does not define you and that you can be a fantastic person and Christian without it. I think I want to work on being a better person first. Of course, Catholicism helps in matters of after-life...faith of a world after this one. But, how can that work of there’s not importance placed on the life we have now?

There is nothing more that I value than what my parents think of me and I never want to disappoint them-- one could argue that that is my first priority. But, it comes at a price because I find myself sacrificing who I am to serve this false facade, giving them the perfect image of the daughter that they raised the “right way”...

I’m still lost and don’t really know where I stand on this. I don’t know. And I don’t think I have to have all the answers, at least not yet.