Hiya tumblr! Let's have a talk about bioessentialist enbyphobia, transmisogyny, and how to make sure transfeminine people, enby or not, feel completely unsafe and unwelcome at your events. First take a look at this group description, and then lets get into it.
First some context. Those of you who know me know about the kinds of clubs I go to. This screenshot was taken from a local event page, and I've blocked out their name because in the months since this event was hosted the group has updated their description to be more inclusive.
Seeing that description, I avoided going to events hosted by that group.
"But Kat, why? You're a woman and it says women are allowed!"
It also implicitly lumps all nonbinary people who were assigned male at birth with men and calls them males.
So why is this a problem for me? Well, if this group sees all AMAB nonbinary people as "male" then it says a lot of things about the ways the see trans women.
Many, and I would venture to assume most, trans women know well the feeling of our womanhood treated as conditional, subject to immediate revocation without warning.
Spaces that are "Women and AFAB exclusive" are often rife with this, and often lead to a lot of really gross and abusive power dynamics where transfems get treated as second class to anyone who was assigned female at birth.
(Side note: Gretchen Felker-Martin did, I believe, a masterful job of portraying this sort of dynamic in her book Manhunt)
If you are a trans woman in one of these spaces, you quickly learn that you are on the thinnest of ice.
Laugh a little too loud? You're male.
Sit or stand a little too close? You're threatening.
Smile at the wrong person? You're making other people uncomfortable.
Transfems, in these spaces, quickly learn that standing up for ourselves in the face of flagrant abuse is verboten, and will be met with swift and decisive punishment and exile.
I personally don't like the word "theyfab" and don't use it. I'm writing this thread to hopefully help people better understand the social dynamics that were being addressed when that term was coined.
It was coined because transfems are forced to navigate a community of things like "afab only" apartment rentals.
It was coined because transfems constantly have to listen to other trans people implicitly describe us as disgusting, hideous freaks.
In short and in closing: consider that the reason why the term "theyfab" exists and "theymab" really doesn't probably lies somewhere in the fact that the sort of person who would call someone a "theymab" doesn't need to, because they *already* just call AMAB trans people "male".
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Batfamily Powerpoint Night! (Part 4: Jason)
<<Part 3: Tim | Part 5: Cass >>
[Masterlist]
Jason: Alright everyone get your hopes way down
Tim: I’m truly terrified of whatever you made for this
Dick: Let’s just be happy he participated!
Dick: Okay yeah nevermind
Bruce: Jason. This is-
Jason: Let’s just be happy I participated
Steph: If I’m not your favorite I’m rioting
Tim: Yeah this is the only right answer
Duke: He really does put up with way too much
Dick: Like childhood Bruce
Bruce: Hn. (in reluctant agreement)
Cass: (signs) I love you too :)
Damian: Cassandra is undoubtedly a very skilled combatant.
Steph: A rare good opinion from Jason
Jason: This is why you’re higher on the hate list
Duke: I am literally so honored, I would like to thank the Academy-
Barbara: He called you “Nightlight”
Tim: And said your suit is ugly
Duke: I don’t even care. I’m too low on the hate list to care.
Dick: He said you’re going to snap?
Duke: I mean I don’t disagree
Tim: I’M THE FOURTH BEST?
Jason: After some new information learned in the previous presentation, Timmy should probably be a lot higher on the list.
Steph: Oh calm down Timbo you barely got “tolerable”
Tim: HE TRIED TO KILL ME AND HE STILL LIKES ME BETTER THAN THE REST OF YOU
Barbara: Fair.
Dick: For the record, Jason, we are dating and I am not a cop anymore
Barbara: I still did date a cop though Dick he’s not wrong
Jason: See this is why she’s lower on the hate list than you
Barbara: You’re just scared to cross me
Jason: ...that too.
Tim: AHAAHAH
Damian: THIS IS UNFAIR
Steph: HAHHHAHHA
Damian: I AM NOT DONE GROWING YET TODD
Jason: You’re still short
Dick: It’s okay Damian, Jason was even shorter when he was your age!
Dick: ...crap.
Jason: Thank you for proving my point.
Tim: At least you’re not a cop anymore
Bruce: You broke his nose, Jason
Jason: He deserved it
Steph: ...wait a minute
Tim: (laughing, in realization) You mean... no
Steph: guys wait no-
Steph: NO WAY AM I YOUR LEAST FAVORITE
Jason: THE F*@#%&$ YOGURT HAD MY NAME ON IT
Steph: YOU CANT CALL DIBS ITS FIRST COME FIRST SERVE
[squabbling continues]
Dick: I’m surprised Bruce didn’t score the number one spot
Bruce: Hn. (in understanding)
Tim: I thought it’d be me honestly
Barbara: Oh come on, he loves all of us. He wouldn’t have come if he didn’t.
Cass: (signing) Agreed. I can go next?
<<Part 3: Tim | Part 5: Cass >>
[Masterlist]
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