#courtly love au

[densewentz]

where is my Dreamling Bridgerton!au with Diamond of the Season Dream and rakish Duke Gadling who pretend to form an attachment after Dream's meddling sibling destroys his marriage prospects and he is left pursued by none but the wretched Lord Burgess

#sorry but i unapologetically love bridgerton #its a period piece fake dating au sprinkled with courtly love and intrigue #and there are so many nuances in s1 that could be used in a Dreamling au #Dreamling #dream must simply marry the man who feels like his dearest friend

[thewrittenpaige]

AU where Amy and Professor Gerald swap places with Sonic and Eggman respectively, but during Forces, instead of six months of being tortured, Gerald (who sees himself as a good guy and who wants to conquer the world so he can "protect" people from harm) instead keeps Amy in a very comfortable cell that has everyone one could ask for. He does this so he can convince her to join him, or at least not interfere with his plans.

He makes sure she has her fortune cards, TV (which plays heavily vetted media that doesn't have a message against him, or his own propaganda), video games. He serves good and healthy food, even offering her favorite desserts if she's on good behavior.

Amy, naturally, hates it. She's ashamed that she was captured, scared for her friends' safety, furious that Gerald thinks he can buy her support by treating her nice. Some days, she tries to break free, but Gerald has planned for every contingency. Other days, she plays along, pretends to be a good "guest". Gerald talks to her often, trying to sway her. They have passionate debates about each's point of view. Amy tries to appeal to his emotions, get him to see her side and free her. Gerald tries to use logic to convince her that the world needs a dictator to protect people's happiness. Neither can agree. They both decide to keep trying. For now.

It reaches a head when Amy is told she has a call from her friend. She gets a video call from Cream, who talks about how everyone has surrendered, how Gerald is in control of the whole world. But for some reason, she says she's happy, and she wants Amy to give up so she can join her friends and live in Gerald's new world. It takes Amy a minute, but she realizes the truth: he used advanced A.I. to generate a fake call with Cream to trick her!

That pushes Amy to the point of rage. She swears she's going to find a way to escape. To make sure Gerald's plans fail. She refuses to let him win or to fall for his tricks. She will find a way to beat him, no matter what.

She will be free, and she will see her friends again. He can count on it.

#sth #sonic the hedgehog #amy rose #professor gerald #gerald robotnik #professor gerald robotnik #au #sth au #sonic au #courtly musings #i love this au okay? #amyswap au

[ironborealis]

Lineage Cousins AU pt.2

Part 1: (link)

The Council is calling it a 'sabbatical' -- a chance for him to rest, reflect, and 'recover' from the stress of Galidraan and Komari being found unfit for Knighthood.

Only a senior padawan, Komari had slain twenty well-trained Mandalorians in their armor on that snowy battlefield. Then she'd turned to him, smiling brightly and so very proud and he'd known that things were about to go horribly wrong. He could see in her eyes that what she wanted was more than just the approval of her master -- she craved something from him that he could never provide her.

He'd dispatched his second, Master Syldatna, to take Fett on to the Governor, as the Senate ordered, while he pulled Komari back into the ship -- one of the many mistakes he made that day -- to try and make the foolish girl see reason.

She'd kissed him as soon as the door to the ship had shut.

He'd pushed her away, tried to make her see that this was a silly fantasy brought on by a post-battle adrenaline crash and likely not enough meditation (his own master's cure all for every wor).

They would forget it ever happened and neither would speak a word of it -- no one, but especially not the Council had to know.

There was shame enough on his lineage for having lost his grand-padawan to Falling so recently, and he'd not double down on the disgrace by losing his own padawan to something as fleeting as lust.

Komari was strong-willed though, something he both admired and cursed about her at times. Trying to make her see reason with a calmly stated rational argument was rather like trying to hold onto sand with a clenched fist -- a futile effort.

He'd been blunt, the only way to get through to her when she got this way: After the battle today he'd been ready to nominate her for her Jedi Trials. All of that was now in jeopardy with the revelation of her inappropriate attachment to him. She had until they returned to Coruscant to decide whether to become a Knight or to chase a foolish fantasy that would never be.

He hoped it'd be an easy choice for her to make in five days. Yet, when she stepped before the Council he'd known with only the intuition that a master could have about their padawan that she'd failed him. With a grieving heart he informed the Council of her attachment. Her subsequent outburst at his 'betrayal' had killed any future she may have had as a Jedi Knight.

She'd stormed off to join a task force headed towards Baltizaar, hard-headed as per usual, determined to prove both him and the Council wrong.

At least she'd finally broken her unseemly attachment to him.

Then the Senator from Naboo had disclosed to the Council the terrible truth of Galidraan -- that he and his fellow Jedi had murdered hundreds of innocent Mandalorians and assisted in selling the sole survivor of the massacre into slavery. The Council had bowed their heads in collective shame and then interrogated him for hours trying to find some fault in him that caused the confrontation to turn into a conflagration -- unwilling to say a word against the Senate who had not only given him the poor intelligence in the first place, but had demanded the surrender of any survivors to the Governor. Surely, the fault for this catastrophe lay mostly with the Senate --

The Council had demurred and invited him to take a period of reflection, which then was formally extended into months once word had returned of Komari's death at the hands of the Bando Gora.

This unwanted "sabbatical" is really a chance for him to set all his affairs in order with the Council none the wiser. Jenza has been hinting for years that with their father gone there could be a place for him on Serreno. Their brother is certainly making a mess of it currently.

There's no denying that he's grown tired of the Council's scheming and politicking that saw Mace Windu promoted to a Council seat before him.

Perhaps he may even be able to do some good once he slips the Senate's leash on the Jedi.

He's sorting through his personal library, deciding on which book he should pass on to Jocasta for her collection and those that he will keep for himself when the message comes.

It takes him a moment to realize that his communicator is going off, a series of strident rings. He's of a mind to ignore it -- commiserations on the loss of Komari have been pouring in non-stop, to the point where he'd actually silenced the Sith-cursed instrument just to get some peace...

Except... there were very few who had permission to override his silencing of the damned thing... and none would do so without a good reason.

He digs through the stacks of books to retrieve the obnoxious little device with an aggrieved sigh.

The message is short:

.bandomeer.

.obiwan kenobi.

.the boy must be trained.

The brevity and lack of capitalization meant that it could only be Qui-Gon. Some excuse about the keys being too small for his fingers, if he recalls correctly.

How interesting that Qui-Gon should reach out to him now, after a decade of strenuously avoiding him without an explanation ever given.

Stranger still that Qui-Gon would recommend to him some initiate washout who'd wound up in one of the "Jedi" Corps... Qui-Gon knew how he'd felt about the Corps, Stars knew they'd had enough "debates" on their utility to the Order back when Qui-Gon was his padawan.

It's a week or so out to Bandomeer, to go and gawk at Qui-Gon's newest pathetic lifeform and try and figure out what about the child had enchanted his former padawan so.

What does a delay of two weeks really matter in comparison to leaving the place that has been his home for over 60 years?

***///***

The limited space aboard the ship means that there really is no escaping Kenobi -- they're sharing a berth space at the Queen's command, along with Anakin, although he suspected there was enough space among the ship crew's quarters for *one* of them to bunk down there instead...

He's careful to never leave Anakin alone with the man, even though he knows that it's illogical. Kenobi did not see him at his best the last time they met all those years ago on Bandomeer, and he won't have the man dripping poison into the boy's ears.

Kenobi has been thankfully reserved at every strategy meeting, his attention mostly focussed on his own holopad where he jots down notes that he doesn't share. Qui-Gon would accuse him of shirking his duties, were it not for the occasional well-thought out suggestion that Kenobi offers when the silence grows too long between himself, the Queen, and Captain Panaka, as they desperately grasp for any semblance of a real plan to defeat the Trade Federation that isn't dependent on an outrageous amount of luck.

He'd sworn to himself that he would be civil to Kenobi as befits a Jedi Master, but after four days his patience with his unwanted companion has grown as thin as a Tooka's whisker. Especially the last two nights when Kenobi has taken up with the Queen's handmaidens after dinner in the mess hall until late into the night. The mess unfortunately shares a wall with their berth, and he can hear their raucous games of sabacc, what he's pretty sure are poetry readings, and occasionally Kenobi's lilting voice singing lover's ballads --

Speak of the Sith and he shall appear.

Qui-Gon groans internally as the door slides open to reveal Kenobi performing the sort of overcomplicated bow down the hallway that would not look out of place in one of those Alderani "historical" holodramas.

"Good night, fairest ladies," Kenobi calls out -- and Force, Qui-Gon thought Rael was bad!

There's a flurry of giggles, before a chorus of "Goodnight, Ser Kenobi"s comes from the handmaidens.

He's mollified to note that Kenobi's garments are undisturbed, the folds still crisp. Not that anything too untoward could have happened in a place as public as the mess hall.

Tonight it seems the handmaidens have elected to play with Kenobi's hair, arranging it in a braid that encircles his head like a crown. Kenobi's hair is still too short to do a proper version of the style, and short pieces hair stand out from his head. The handmaidens have covered these in some sort of wax that makes them curl up sharply at the tips.

Kenobi looks like a sun-bleached Zabrak.

"Good evening, Master Jinn," Kenobi takes a seat on the bunk opposite of Qui-Gon's, and begins to undo the braid, held in place with what is revealed to be an alarming number of pins.

"Kenobi," he replies, but it comes out sounding hostile so he adds, "You seem to have been having fun."

Force, that came out even worse.

Kenobi lets out a vague hum in response, running his fingers along his scalp to break up the last of the braid.

"Rabé was eager to experiment. Apparently Stewjoni hair is supposed to be more naturally inclined to sculptural styles than their own, and Eritaé and Sabé decided to join in."

"Not Padmé, then?" He's glad that not everyone seems to have fallen for "Ser" Kenobi's charms.

"No, I rather imagine the Queen has other things on her mind than pantomiming Courtly Love."

Kenobi reveals the Queen's identity so casually that Qui-Gon barely resists the urge to suck at his teeth - he can feel the ghostly cuffing of Master Dooku's palm on the back of his head every time he's tempted to.

My padawan will not act like a common farmer was the frequent rebuke.

Judging by the length of Kenobi's hair -- it's practically tradition for young Knights with hair to let it grow untamed for a time once they're no longer obligated to wear the traditional padawan cut -- Kenobi must have been knighted two to three years ago.

Qui-Gon thinks he may have received an invitation, but he'd been terribly busy with the mess in Ankorhajj that he absolutely couldn't tear himself away to attend something as frivolous as a lineage brother being knighted.

Then Master Dooku left the Order shortly afterwards and there hardly seemed a point in reconnecting with Kenobi at all. Their Master hadn't even deigned to leave a note.

"They're teenagers," He scolds, because while Qui-Gon's not unfamiliar with the concept of 'Courtly Love' in the Naboo sense, he's also aware how quickly attachments can form. Attachment has been the downfall of so many in their lineage...

"They're children preparing themselves to fight in a war," there's a flicker of what can only be described as an 'infinite sadness' in Kenobi's eyes, before the anger that Qui-Gon remembers most about Kenobi as a boy burns it away.

"The Naboo make a sport of Courtly Love. I'm already a lost cause by their rules, since my vows as a Jedi warn me away from developing the sort of jealousy required to even be capable of 'love' by their definition." Kenobi sighs and his anger cools, his gaze becoming distant.

"If pretending with them for a few hours every evening, however, keeps their minds off the horror that awaits them upon return to Naboo, then it's no hardship for me to entertain them."

Kenobi's expression becomes haughty and Qui-Gon is unpleasantly reminded of their mutual master. "It should comfort you to know that Captain Panaka has volunteered to act as their chaperone. He stopped looking ready to disembowel me after a couple hours last night and tonight started regaling us with the details of the courtship of his first wife. A romance worthy of a holodrama I believe was the consensus,"

Kenobi melodramatically collapses back into his bunk as if swooning.

This conversation is not going any place where Qui-Gon thought it would. He feels like he should apologize, but he's concerned that if he gives even a little that Kenobi will take a whole parsec. Their master certainly knew how to, and made certain to teach his padawans the skill.

"I should not have been so hasty in my judgement," Qui-Gon settles on. "I do not know you well enough to make such judgements about your character."

"And whose fault is that, brother," Kenobi replies with only the faintest hint of bitterness, as he sits back up and begins to remove his boots carefully.

They both sit in the uncomfortable silence that follows as Qui-Gon fights the urge to feel stung by Kenobi's accusation.

There was a grain of truth to it after all, at least from a certain point of view. Kenobi had messaged him multiple times in the early years of his padawanship, but there had always been something more important that needed Qui-Gon's attention immediately. Once Qui-Gon found the time to write a response months might have passed and he frequently found himself with nothing to say at all.

Eventually, Kenobi got the hint and the messages stopped.

Force, why couldn't Kenobi be satisfied that Qui-Gon had found him a master to make him into a knight and leave it at that?

Kenobi has moved on, placing his boots at the end of bunk, and standing as he begins removing his leather obi.

Kenobi pauses, staring into the dim red glow of the wall chronometer for a moment, before looking over his shoulder at Qui-Gon with an absolutely wicked look on his face.

"It's ten in the evening, Master Jinn, do you know where your padawan is?"

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #star wars au #fanfic #star wars fanfiction #qui gon jinn #count dooku #yan dooku #Lineage cousins au #disaster lineage #Dooku is Obi-Wan Kenobi's master AU #padme's handmaidens #Padmé in her quarter life crisis playing the sexy version of Courtly Love with Anakin makes the black corset dress in aotc make sense OK #As well as everything that happens afterwards #Obi-Wan and the handmaidens are basically having a sleep over and playing Mystery Date

[jessfandrawer]

Build-a-prompt request #2!

Renruki with:

Kiss

Medieval AU (princess x knight vibes)

This was a challenge, but fun! Thanks for the request @serene-faerie! I went slightly warrior princess x knight errant with it, haha.

I hope the medieval-ized swords don't look too janky...

#renruki #my art #bleach fanart #build a prompt #request box #finished request #kiss #medieval au #princess x knight #renji x rukia #kuchiki clan #what token did Rukia give her knight to wear while he was questing for her hand? #sode no shirayuki #zabimaru #courtly love

[kingsbride-moved]

Finally drew them together... two background options cuz I'm indecisive 💘

#🖼️ | works of the thesean painter #[ love is the only reason to do anything in this life ] #Andreas referred to himself as a knave Once and it stuck with me for some reason dnskensjsj #Maybe I'll make a courtly love AU with them. Anyways #self ship #self ship community #black selfship #oc x canon #[ and evermore amongst our mirth ] #[ his mind wanders the labyrinth ]

[spikey-fudger]

Obidala: Medieval AU

#obidala #obi wan #padme #star wars #medieval au #padme x obi wan #courtly love so there's mutual pining overload #and long wistful gazes #idk how they'll make it work #because they're both so dedicated to their jobs #color grading ewan to match natalie was a pain #ewan mcgregor #natalie portman #jack the giant slayer #the other boleyn girl

[oklotea]

I would love to hear more about your eah npmd au

OHHHHH REEEEALLLYYYYY NOWWWWW?????? :DDDD

Well first of all, i didn't change much about the original story line. I don't need to its PERFECT!!!!! But I did change some of the of characters personalities a bit to fit the eah characters I casted them as, but not by a longshot

Second of all, I'm currently planning out a high school is killing me animatic of this au, VERY SELF INDULGENT AND I'M VERY EXCITED TO DO THIS

Next, I'm gonna list what characters I casted as who!!!!!!

Raven Queen is the queen herself..... Stephanie Lauter....

And Dexter is Pete Spankoffski... Dexter Spankoffski..... (Because I'm dexven trash)

Humphrey Dumpty I casted as Richie because he looks like he could be an anime fan, AND he's the camera man for Blondie's Just Right

Hopper croakington the second is Ruth flemming because no one else suits the role other than him tbh, what with him being desperate to be loved by someone ANYONE

Aaaandddd probably my favorite casting choice of all....

Lizzie hearts as Grace Chastity and Courtly Jester as Max Jågerman!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know!!!!! I'm insane in the head!!!!!! There's something wrong with these two and I think it would be SOOOO FUN DRAWING THEM

Here's a few shoddily drawn sketches to show you my vision

VERY shoddy but I hope this interests you.

Click for better quality

If you have any more questions or you wanna talk about it a bit more with me I will gladly answer!!!! :DD

Have a good day!!! Tysm for the ask!!!

#eah #ever after high #eah au #npmd #starkid #eah npmd au #tea art 🎨 #I LOVE THIS AU ITS SO STUPID BUT ITS GONNA BE SO FUN TO DRAW #courtly jester #lizzie hearts #humphrey Dumpty #raven queen #dexven #hopper croakington ii

[achirding]

King’s Champion Snippet: Lancelot and Guinevere

“Lancelot?!“ A voice calls out loudly and desperately from the far side of the courtyard, like the speaker can’t believe their eyes.

It seems everyone turns in unison to see Guinevere run across the courtyard. Her dress isn’t really designed for running, but she doesn’t seem to care that the fabric is tangling on her legs. Shadow would think flying would be faster and more practical, but the bat doesn’t slow down except for when she stumbles on a loose stone.

Lancelot moves in the blink of an eye, catching Guinevere by the arms and steadying her. He lifts the queen up gently, still holding onto her as if afraid she’ll fall again, quickly glancing down as if to make sure she wasn’t injured, “Are you alright-?”

“Lancelot!”

Guinevere throws herself into his arms before he can finish his sentence. Her arms are tight around Lancelot’s chest and her face is buried in the crook of his neck, even though his armor must be uncomfortably hard and cold.

Shadow doesn’t really understand how the court operates and doesn’t care to learn- but even he can tell something changed. It’s like a cold chill settled over the group the minute the Queen hugged Lancelot. Shadow isn’t sure why this is such a big deal, but it is. (Gawain hugged his friend to no fanfare, why can’t the queen?) 

“You fool, why did you wait so long to return?”

Lancelot freezes like he was doused in ice water, eyes widening in stunned surprise. It’s a strangely open expression that looks out of place on a face that looks so much like Shadow’s own.

“I thought you were lost to me!“

Lancelot, who had still been holding onto Guinevere’s arms to steady her, let’s go quickly as if he was burned. His arms fall to his sides heavily, fists clenched tightly, allowing the hug but not reciprocating it.

“...My Queen,“ Lancelot sighs softly, a whisper of a word that holds a hundred different meanings all at once. It almost looks like the black hedgehog is in pain as he lightly presses his cheek to the side of Guinevere’s head, breath ghosting on her ear. It’s a very subtle gesture, but Shadow is starting to get the impression that there’s another layer to their relationship than simply Queen and Champion.

Shadow glances at Arthur to ask about, but the blue hedgehog looks... tired. Not jealous, or at least not jealous in the traditional way, more like he’s bracing himself for something unpleasant or awkward.

Lancelot’s voice has a strained quality to it when he finally speaks again, “My lady...”

He tries to pull away, but it’s a very weak attempt that doesn’t accomplish anything, “Please. I am not worthy of... such concern.”

#satbk #sonic and the black knight #satbk au #king's champion au #satbk sir lancelot #satbk guinevere #writing #rouge the bat #shadow the hedgehog #shadouge #guinevere and lancelot make me so sad so saaaaaad i love them!!! forbidden love... courtly romance... they care so much for each other but #it cannot be... lancelot is my favorite so he gets to be shipped with everyone haha this au he gets guin <3 #lanceguin

[marmotish]

For the time traveler AU what if Freyja was sent to the medieval ages?

((not me having to google when the medieval era was b/c i thought her trip to 1591 covered that 😂))

After falling overboard the Titanic, Freyja ends up back in the Scottish Lowlands. The year is 1503 - almost 90 years before her first time-jump landing, and thankfully still many years before the Scottish Witchcraft Act came into play. But still, no reason to get complacent. She didn’t particularly fancy being sentenced again.

How she managed to get employment in a lord’s household wandering around the countryside in her nightgown is anyone’s guess, but it probably had something to do with her “talent for persuasion”. As luck would have it, there was a tournament being hosted there in the coming days so there was a lot of help in the form of manual labour required. It also meant that Freyja got to watch jousting and mêlée competitions, which she greatly enjoyed.

During this tournament she meets a lovelorn knight who is struggling to win the favour of his beloved. Eager to see more action, Freyja persuades him to let her tag along on subsequent tournaments. In return? She’ll do her best to play Cupid.

#hogwarts mystery #hphm mc #freyja young #au tag #time traveller au #ask #anonymous #freyja doesn’t know shit about the rules of courtly love so of course she starts with ‘have you tried talking to her? just casually?’

[abyssalmermaiden]

20 👀

20. What-ifs/Alternate Timelines

oh so there's an AU somewhere in which Aryaille and Haurchefant get married (listens to As I Am by Heather Dale and cries) Although idk how well that would ultimately work out since there's no way she could bring herself to live in Coerthas full time and he's too dutiful to elope to Thanalan ^^; part-time guard a Dragonhead part-time adventurer?

Send me a character + a number and I’ll tell you my headcanons for:

#my thing for them is 'courtly love but we're both knights' #thank you! ^^ #ask answered #AU #haurchefant x wol #aryaille nox #haurchefant greystone

[ragnarlothcat]

I am in love with the poet au!! That snippet you wrote is fantastic. Anakin’s a passionate, dumb, well meaning menace of a man and Obi-wan being a total goner for him is incredible in itself, but the fact that he has to help woo Padme ooooh it hurts so good. Also I agree with Padme being uninterested. She’s the local Don Juan lesbienne law reformer who’s got no time for Anakin’s puppy love. Jury’s out whether or not she realises what’s going on before Anakin does and decides to subtly (read: shove them in a closet) help the two out

Ahh thank you 🥰 Anakin is definitely all those things and he's especially oblivious here. He's so certain that he loves Padmé even though he craves Obi-Wan's attention and approval and constant touch. He's not just dumb about poor Obi-Wan's very obvious suffering, he's dumb about his own feelings.

I think I want Padmé to figure it out early! Because Anakin is right about one thing, she does like poetry. After enough poems where the subject is very clearly the earnest, Obi-Wan-obsessed guy very clumsily trying to court to her she gets the picture and tries to steer them together. And yeah Padmé has no time for marriage or lovestruck boys she's know for like half an hour, she's got stuff to do! Salons to attend! Laws to reform! Ladies to seduce!

(Suddenly I'm interested in Don Juan Padmé's exploits.........)

#asks #thecarpetmerchant #obikin #poet au #padmé reminds me a bit of that la maupin woman #with fewer swords #but still! #scandalous frenchwomen #anyway she is a big fan of obi-wan and anakin getting together #not only because if anakin leaves her alone she has more time for courtly intrigue #but also because obi-wan's poems become much less tragic when he isn't pining so much #the mood at court really improves once their resident genius poet stops writing about the agony of love #and instead has sex in a carriage

[ragdoll127-ffxiv]

March of the Tropes: Day 29 - Courtly Love

The loyal knight has fallen for his Emperor.

#ffxiv #gposers #ktisis pose #reshade #PurpleCocoon #wolnpc #wolgraha #wolgraha brainrot #wolexarch #R'alma/G'raha #R'alha #March of the Tropes #Courtly Love #fairytale au #I really didn't think I'd ever bring this back #I had no reason to pursue it any further #But I really like this set #so who knows #maybe when I have some time I might work on developing an actual narrative for this au #or not we'll see #might just be another fun aesthetic thing to revisit #we're almost to the end of the month! #I still can't believe I've stuck with this thing for this long #This is the last gpose set #the rest of the entries are all written #But they're also full-length oneshots that I've been working on for a while #and I'm very excited to debut them over the next couple days #hopefully unless they're late which they might be because they're still not quite done yet lol

[whumpcereal]

Do you have any AUs you want to do for Behavior Modification?

Clearly, that role reversal AU has taken over my brain...so that. But I had a long drive today, and I was entertaining myself with fantasy!AU. Imagine noble knight Joe? I mean, would I write that? Probably not. But it's adorable to imagine.

#joe prescott oc #the most stalwart knight in all the land #excellent at courtly love #behavior modification #behavior modification au

[laufire]

six sentence sunday (iii)

Down under, Meg had been as good as royalty. In the good days, lesser demons either prostrated themselves before her without hesitation or were filled by envy and rancour barely held at bay. But everyone, every single one of them, sook out her favour as the rare treasure it was.

Abaddon had been no exception. The Knight of Hell had claimed to kill in Meg’s honour, had brought down poor suckers as offerings. Meg felt more than a little amused by this, but even more so by the pleasure of acting above it all; a higher class of being that she was, by virtue of her ties with Azazel, Prince of Hell.

Now Meg’s nails dug painfully on the armrests of her wheelchair. Something told her that pattern was going to hold for the reunion.

#little meg centric au circa s9 that i've written a little bit about #it'll take a while for it to be ready though #abaddon x meg #is a part of it but not the point #i simply enjoy thinking about an equivalent of courtly love for hell lmfao. imagine how fucked up #and meg was a ~prince's daughter~ and abaddon a knight. so the hierarchy and tropes there? fun to think about lol #talking to the void #my thoughts #my wips #supernatural #spn thoughts #meg masters #meg 2.0 #spn abaddon #femslash #favourites: monster women

[notmuchtoconceal]

( o ) goodimpressionofmyself

[October 28th, 2020 7:40am] 

bro, i’m some kinda necrocoprofungal fringe weirdo with a fetish for bein normal

i’m the punchline to a joke from 2005

my life is the vain pursuit of an ideal of sublime banality, this horridly tacky laudanum fugue of gilded wheat fields in subdivided painted picket houses, succumbed to oppressive concrete nothingness in a time that never was

the fury of a broiling beneath. dogs in an open field. vacancies within vacancies brah

primeval growth before the white man raped the land, gnarled and gambrous with all matter of shoots, bulbs, rosettes and spores. the wasteland of hollow points here in the heartland, ancient and centipeodal as the sea animals in the dinosaur books i read as a boy when everything was doe eyed and my head was filled with air. when i was yet to be so tantalizingly leaden

when i. simply. was still here

end of time. end of memory. thoughts comin and goin in strips a nitrate film

endless carousels a shape, bro. so many so lovely

so many the same

i’ll let you in. i’ll rest my hand on your back. i’ll lean in close and i’ll say brah, gonna show you some real sick shit brah

can’t help but smile

not smart to show fear. eye to eye. teeth to teeth. funk to funky. you’ll like it, i promise. the waltz always strangles. the wires in the notes. the house lights go up and down. spirographs of flesh. an orchestra pit of sarlaac. there always comes release after a dream turns to a nightmare brah

bro, i once saw this grindrshame post where this dude was like 6′2″, built and headless in an anonymous grey hoodie, and his bio said he was gonna strangle you and chop you up with an axe or some shit. people in the comments were saying he was funny. this ain’t shameable. shame on you for trying to shame a funny man with a nice blocky torso and big strong hands

i thought brah, fuck yeah brah, you get it. you get it. that’s what i want. walk straight toward the man triggerin just the right amount a threat detection response. we gonna fuck? he gonna choke me? how hard? i don’t fuckin know brah. one way to find out. i want a fire. baby i’m lit. pour gasoline all over my dick. harder bro harder. gonna burn this fuckin house to the ground bro. run screamin into desert night. wake up in a ditch clingin to you in grit and despair. look at you. know you. see past you. to the man you were before. who you forgot you were. who i know without knowin you know for i don’t know if what i see is what you know. then i realize. none a that matters. this moment is love and love is this moment. i remember only the smell of campfires and cold. you were the best mistake a my life brah. it was deffo more than worth the arson charges 

bro?

yeah brah?

i didn’t think you’d be the kinda guy to go on night walks

haha brah? what’s that supposed to mean brah. i love all this dennis hopper shit. over there, look at that lamp post. that incandescent diner. reflections in empty windows. darker glasses hiding darker curtains. way the light ripples through the leaves. shit’s fuckin gorgeous, brah

city feels like a dream bro

brah? brah? haha, brah you ever dissociate like real hard

haha, like real hard

haha

brah

brah

for a second i thought we were like girls in a dreampop video brah

bro, don’t. don’t say shit like that bro. holy fuckin shit. for a sec i swear i felt my dick shrivel up bro

haha, kitty got claws, but i the aesthete and the visionary have the petrifying gaze of the gorgon embedded in the imago of the mother

brah, what the hell’s an ass teat brah?

it’s a dude who’s like a faggot, but he still likes pussy

don’t sound a thing like you brah

some tastes are more refined than others

the most refined taste is that of the fraternal platonic bond between men of value, whose warring passions ignite an agonsy and ectasies which blurs the lines between romance and reason

all right socrates, bend over

haha

hahahaha

brah

brah

i die a little inside when i see you smile brah 

brah

i never thought i’d be so happy

…

BRO

holyfu–

haha, watch where you’re goin brah. dumbass almost got creamed by a bus

bro, sorry bro, i’m just like… 

yeah, brah?

where am i… where are…

you’re there. i’m here.

…

bro, are you?

‘i’m here, you’re there’ sir, do you mistake me for a child?

my apologies, sir. your motor coordination spoke for itself

haha, real funny brah. real cute thing to hear from a tight toosh in tighty whities

haha, brah. someone’s feelin sassy brah

it’s just… i din’t think it was real funny brah

nah, nah. keep goin brah. you’re cute when you’re cunty

bro i am not cunty, that is gaslightin. i’ve been recordin this whole conversation, it’s admissible in court without your consent by illinois law, and i can establish a pattern and motive. i’m gonna sue your ass for emotional damages brah

first off double check that law book. it don’t say what you think it says. pause for effect. okay. when you check the book it’ll say exactly what you remember it saying, but you still second guessed yourself. boom. alpha dominance. you’ve been gaslit. gonna get locked in the footbox tonight, fagboy. gonna stain that fuckin faggot lung a yours with three days a heavy liftin and ballin… also ‘toosh’, bro are you a grade school church hag? are you gonna give me a time out? knock it off with that pansy shit, brah. we both agree my masculinity is sacred, stop tryin to subvert it with your estranged gayness

i’m in love with you bro. i hate it i hate how much i’m in love with you… if i admit to it, then i admit that i’m stupid. stupider than you in fact, because yes, i am in fact smart enough to know better. this is 100% my fault. my head says this’s idiocy, but my heart yearns for you with a yearning beyond yearning. it’s a heart valve of picture postcards all the way down my irony innards a chef boyardee spelling out EA Poet sole in bouquets a cankers and open sores… maybe i could only ever hope for self-destruction, to fall with you ever downward, to be the arc of a fire poppy riding the ember to completion. maybe that’s all love is bro. the theater of heroism. a stupid idiot danger. maybe my parents did have a successful marriage, but i’m not gonna say that… i’m not gonna say any of that. i’m gonna keep that all to myself

smart man, brah. that’s why i like you like you. down for a night walk symposia with a flourish of baudelaire for texture. reminds me a those ceilings in my house, brah. ones with the paintstrokes that look like canyons

[cachunk]

bro, did you just slap your head bro

bro, i dunno? did i brah?

bro, you did. you deffo did

haha, i did?

your headphones cachunked, didn’t you hear?

nah, brah, i don’t think… no wait, yeah i did, haha

haha

fuckin dumbass

dumbass meathead

dumbass meathead musclebull muscle toy andro droll androgeneticist muscle drone rubber drone rubber room retard ubermensch apeman grotesque gooner hunchback henchman dumbfuck douchebag dudebro

first of his name

king in the north

haha

hahaha

bro, stop i’m still in mourning

bro, it sucked since season five, bro

bro, how the fuck do you have your best character, the only character left who’s played by a competent actress – i’m sorry bro, that bitch with the caterpillar eyebrows cannot act. she has like white bread girl next door bimbo giggly and all the fury and drama of grade school gymnasium theater

bro, you are that, but the gay version

first off, fuck you fagboy. that’s two days in the footbox now. i’m gaggin you with the dirty crusty pair a briefs i use as a jizz rag faggot. gonna be tastin it all night fagboy, tastin my dirty alpha fuckin cock steeped in my tight white fuckin briefs. yeah, you love it. love watchin daddy’s uncut alpha bulge standin up tall and straight in his tight white fuckin briefs. watchin daddy’s hard uncut alpha cock writhin in the transparent cotton, growin fatter and nastier with every gush a blood – the mass and veiny contouring suggestive of a lunatic in a straightjacket confined to a prison a ballsweat, asylum walls of the fly some brutalist garter prison of mid-century ad copy suffocatin me in my futile role as protector and provider. yeah, you love daddy’s uncut alpha dick, don’t you fagboy?

yes, sir. please gag me with your briefs sir. i worship and adore you sir

you’re my everything bro. i wouldn’t know what i’d do without you without you in my strong arms keepin you safe and warm

bro

awgh

bro stop it bro

brah i’m a sensitive man, you know that brah. i’m really closer to a lesbian in temperament

fuckin gina gershon leather dyke 

haha, you’re like a helpless lil pray animal, bro. i wanna rape you

sorry, brah. not feasible. definition-ally, one cannot rape the willing

objection. your honor, we have established the defendant’s mind is weak and malleable. upon the conclusion of our night walk i could throw him upon my svelte king size mattress, tie him wrist and ankle to the bedposts, and fuck him senseless – your honor, i could fuck him until he was drooling catatonic with eyes tuned out like television static, absolutely fry the circuitry of his brain with pleasure… and with but a mere suggestion make him think it was the most brutal of horrors, an utterly charmless display of freakshow primate dominance which would leave the skirts fallen from the hangers. i could have him bent over lobotomized 1950′s hysterical with a hole in the head from uncle sam, crying in his sad lil victorian woman way oh you foul man you foul man you absolute brute

i give up. i’m helpless to you

i am your toy. don’t break me

i’m weak

i need you

bro i need you

bro

bro

i was missin you real bad bro

brah i know bro

god i can’t fuckin st–

WOAH

the fu–

haha, b r o

eeeeee

bro you are clueless, bro

what wa–

bro, that weren’t no bus. that was a bus stop bro

which one of us am…?

which one of us am…? bro are you for real bro?

bro, where, where am 

bro… bro

bro?

bro, pay attention. you listenin? i’m me, you’re you

bro, i’m…

bro? BRO?

…

bro?

‘i’m me, you’re you’. very instructional. very confucian. i have been enlightened. thank you. thank you very much. every moment we spend together is a treasure

bro, i know it. you know i got your back bro

it hurts bro. my head hurts. my feet hurt. my spine hurts. the bud of passion lies dormant in the embers exhausted. hold me close bro?

bro, you know it bro

mmphh

feels good don’t it bro

gooood you smell good brah

like that brah? like curlin up in daddy’s smelly meathead pits

mmmph. can smell you through the leather brah. mmmmmm fuck. wanna curl up in a bearskin rug made a more you brah

get in closer. i’ll crush you

please bro. crush me like a fuckin bug

mmmphhhhh 

ahhhhhh

like that fagboy

i am an insect. i am unworthy. i cry tears of joy every moment i can smell you, see you, touch you, kiss you, you in all your earthly imperfections are what i deem a suitable enough surface onto which to project my unattainable ideal of exquisite manhood

it’s an horor, brah. use me. i’m a dumb mule fit only to serve and amuse you

flex, bro. i wanna kiss it

pffftt

hmmppph. god you’re a man. those fuckin pecs. flatten me like a migrant worker under a speedin freight train brah

haha bro what the fuck

a bray of laughter, wheezing forth like a geyser from dry reedy lungs – eyes dry reedy wells from which there are no tears to draw

i am the sun

i am the air

you’re a fire sign

a lemon lime

a soda pop

i’d rather not

please picture a barbershop quartet on fire

you were always the care

taker her sir

what a lovely image. how much did it cost?

twenty five cents, my good man

a pleasure, sir. i shall return tomorrow to view it again

why sir, you can view it anywhere

anywhere

anytime anywhere

anytime anywhere? good sir, what sorcery is this? is this one of those portable videographs i’ve heard so much about

why no sir, ’tis but the power of imagination

imagination, why what is that?

it’s when you get like pictures and notions in your head, sir

oh, that doesn’t sound typical. are you sure of that?

why yes sir. why i bet if we sat still and quieted down for a moment, we could picture all sorts of things

well… i suppose it is considered adventurous to try things once

okay… you ready…

okay…?

yeah? on the count of 3?

I

I I

I V

I I I

…

…

…

are we…

shhh… i was imaginin somethin

aw shi-

shhh

….

….

holy fuckin shit brah

bro. bro i know rite

are we allowed to do this? this can’t be legal

not just legal, bro. free

why isn’t everybody doin this? we have to tell the world!

can’t bro.

bro?

won’t listen

aw shit. what do we do now?

i dunno. we could light more shit on fire

the gumption i mire, i just wish you’d channel it more productively

hard, brah. nobody taught me how to be a man. i had to assemble it piecemeal from the shards of a collective stained glass mural detonated by the infobomb a mass media and bulldozed by the flatiron a neoliberal accelerationism

can’t tell if sperging or anime stoic

fuck off normie

my undiagnosed bipolar disorder grants me currency in your fucked up inverted mental illness values hierarchy, but joke’s on you, that’s the cost of the psychic heritage i carry, my drive towards shamanism. hear him, hear him, hear the voice of venus in cancer beyond the grave. can i getta   69   69   95 boy

brah brah

for i am a seer… for am i a liar…

BRAH

i am a seer  i am a liar

haha, naw man. he’s fine. theater guy, they’re characters, you know

my father   ran the prison

shhhh. slow down brah. you’re shakin. come ere. come to daddy. come get up in daddy’s leather  where you belong

it’s not me, it’s the wind. the autumn wind. creeping listless upon my dream of an indian summer

yeah. that’s it. get right up in daddy’s pit

mmmph. like i’m bastin in your smell bro

yeah, that’s it. my heat and my musk. cocooning you. seeping into you. staining you. makin you more and more my good obedient beta boy. like that don’t you. like bein my bitch, don’t you beta?

yes sir

say it

i like bein your beta bitch boy sir

feels good to let daddy take control. just be a dumb beta for awhile and follow along. be a good lil boy for your alpha and obey mindlessly

yes sir

fuckin your head with my words. commands feel so fuckin good snakin through your brain, suffocatin any nerve bundles tryin ta resist

i’m weak sir. i’m weak. i need you. complete me. destroy me.

bro. bro. resist me. sustain me. complete me. i am an absence without you. this thing i am. this slightness. this frailty. it’s something no mass can overcome. the weight. a will no body could ever embody. do you see how i weep? i who was a beast who was a man dreaming he was a god

i love you bro

love you bro

love you bro love you bro

love you bro love you bro glove you bro globe you bro

we want you big brother

big brother

bro bro

bro

bro

bro, i wasn’t done. 

bro, wha-

third, i am not autistic. fourth, even if i was, autism is not a mental illness, it’s a perfectly natural autoimmune response to unnatural vaccinations. my teats are the most robust and the milkiest. my pearl necklace houses the most cum. my boots are the most patent and the leatheriest. second, bro. they had their best fuckin character standin around on a balcony all season doin fuckin nothin. after season fuckin six bro, they took her absolutely fuckin nowhere, i don’t give a shit how much trashy pirate dick she didn’t get, it was all a waste

make a wish

we never kiss’d

tears’n the rain

it’s always the same

i know, bro. hurts to fall out of love. hurts not to care. run outta stories outta service

not gonna worry about that anymore brah. don’t plan on it happenin again anytime soon. it’s all very conventional. not anything new. nice to see it reheated like a warm stain. i would rather remember the bouquet of theses tastes of yesterday, not the bilge and bile they became

bro

Bro

delete me

d e l e t e  m e

b  r  o

b     r     o

[screaming beyond the infinite]

what was i saying

that you loved me stupid

you loved yourself stupid, goonerboy

hey, look

what

porchlight’s still on

haha, fuckin dumbass

who you callin dumbass, dumbass

to sass and the spastic, forevermore shall your minds be plastic

whoooom

airplane exploding noises

tens of thousands of women and children dead

goddamn, i do love you stupid

maybe we should burn down some buildings

nother time brah. there’ll be other nights. other night walks

other nights other night walkers

bro

bro

don’t think this is gonna be no greetin card endin brah. you got no fuckin idea what’s waitin for you on the other side a that door. i could clamp a leatherclad paw over your mouth and crush your jaw into a bony fuck funnel for my uncut alpha cock. i could throatfuck you so hard i work my way right through nuttin your fuckin faggot brains out. i could rip your fuckin throat wideopen with my bare hands and garrot you with your own tongue i don’t see that fucker black with filth from the bottoma a my boots you dumb faggot. tomorrow i wanna see daddy’s alpha boots fuckin spotless, comprende motherfucker? 

the door slams shut behind you

you’re not gettin the fuck back out for a good long while

better think

long and fuckin hard about what you let inside a you brah, fuck knows if you’ll ever get the stains out

haha

haha

night walks bro

fuckin night walks

[to the boys across the street on the golf course]

cocksucker

#I #eternally recurrent #canonical texts #dog brain #woof woof #-- #big dick energy #big dumbass vibes #depressed thot energy #ludonarrative dissociative identity #baked af #i dunno #backwards cap bro #fuckin swole brah #dumbass himbro #douchebrahtrash #good meathead #good briefsboy #powerlifter build #nous vivons au cinema #alpha fux beta bux #entropy #silent majority #silence is golden duct tape is silver #the north wind #what the fuck am i reading #lord what fools these mortals be #bro love #intensely unstable energy #a courtly bromance

[hadtochangemyurlquick]

it's finals season which means i'm writing sooo much fanfic. i'm working on three (consistently but poking around all of them) rn, the twin au which i've posted about before, the pike au which is so depressing no one wants to hear about it, and the azgeda!clarke au which i posted about once and got no notes which means everyone wants more info. i just wrote this scene for it and i think it's probably the funniest thing i've ever written. spoilers for a fic that will likely never be written lol. clarke was raised by the ice nation so speaks fluent azgedasleng which is in italics.

“She’s in there,” One of the guards pointed to the door both groups were standing around. 

Clarke nodded and for a moment let herself hope, she clenched her hand around the doorknob and imagined that it was Lexa in there, waiting for her. 

Costia smiled as they made eye contact. She sat casually at one end of a long table, boots kicked up. 

“What the fuck do you want?” Clarke asked, plopped down at the other end of the table. Abby shut the door, and leaned against, eyes narrowed at Costia.

“I am just so delighted to see this,” Costia said. “It’s better than I could’ve dreamed. I mean, you? Wanfisa, healer of death, azgedakru supremacist, Lexa’s biggest weakness, now here? Traitor to Lexa and Azgeda? Wearing the clothes of the mountain? It’s almost too good to be true. You even brought your real mom to meet me too, that’s so cute.” 

“My real mother is dead,” Clarke said quietly and Costia’s face went blank. 

“I did hear that. And I’m sorry. She didn’t deserve that.”

Clarke nodded. “What is it you want, Costia?” 

“Mostly this, revenge,” Costia shrugged. “But unfortunately, I’m not here just for pleasure.”

Clarke crossed her arms. 

“Skaikru is fucking terrible at this. Strategies, negotiations, plans. If we lose this war Lexa’s gonna get deposed and we might not have a big enough force like this again to take on the mountain. They need to shape up.”

Clarke nodded. “So, you need me to…” 

“Come back to the war table,” Costia said and stood. Clarke raised her eyebrows as Costia made her way over. “I might hate your guts but you’re smarter than your mother by a longshot. Or any of her people. We need you to win this war.” 

“Lexa won’t be happy with that.” 

“Unfortunately,” Costia said, “she will.” Clarke’s breath caught and she stood. “Consider this a chance to prove your loyalty to the coalition. Maybe even to azgeda.” 

Abby cleared her throat and stepped forward. “Clarke doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone.” 

“The sky people have killed hundreds of innocent trikru, and Clarke is the daughter of their leader. She has a lot to prove,” Costia said. 

“She doesn’t need your people,” Abby said. 

Costia raised an eyebrow at Clarke. “I have been taking your place not just at the war table, you know. In a lot of respects.”

Clarke scoffed. “Impressive. Desperate whore goes after a heart broken woman. It’s never happened before, they’re gonna be talking about you at bonfires for generations.” 

Costia slapped her, hard, across the cheek. “You kiss your skaikru mother with that mouth azas? Lexa didn’t sound all that heartbroken when my fingers were curled inside her.”

“Away from my daughter, now,” Abby got between them. Clarke rolled her eyes and ignored the stinging on her cheek. 

“You’re a skilled hunter Costia, I can’t deny it. Maybe one day you’ll even manage to find some dignity.” Clarke said. 

“Better a failed hunter than a failed healer,” Costia said. “I’ve never hurt her the way you have.”

Clarke thought about returning the slap, but Abby grabbed Costia’s arm. “You’re out of here. Now.” Clarke stayed behind as Costia was escorted to the border and Abby soon returned, arms crossed. “You going to tell me what that was?”

#for a complete commentary on how this stories plays into the world of courtly romance bc that's the paper i'm supposed to be writing now #send an ask!!! #literally have read so much medieval myth all of my dialogue is beginning to sound like it #and every theme and motif is directly copied from it #would love to talk about it #and also this au!!! #costia is alive which is fun! #she's a total bitch but i modeled her after me and she has such a good reason to be a bitch #clarke is an azgeda healer #okay the back and forth between costia and clarke of one of them being a hunter one of them being a healer #single handedly ressurected this au from the dead #i was like that's so funny i have to keep writing this #i have the first three ish chapters written and have written like four or five random chapters in the middle #it's such a fun au #would be happy to make a mood board too if people wanted vibes #i have a pinterest board for it #and for the sister au #please send me asks about my clexa aus i have so many rn #and i'm so excited about all of them #clexa #gus writes #the 100 #clarke griffin #lexa #clexa fanfic #azgeda!clarke #azgeda au #that's gonna be the tag for it #this is also a rough draft so be nice