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babyleostuff · 3 months

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when you call them your husband | ot13

❥ seungcheol

goes through five stages of a mental breakdown, because what did you just call him??? if you ever called him your husband in front of people, cheol would turn into a stuttering mess with cheeks as red as a tomato. if you did it when you were by yourselves he’d start whining like a bitch, getting shy as hell, because why are you messing with his heart like that? on rare days, though, he’d embrace the husband figure and start calling you “wife” and make you shy

❥ jeonghan

so smug - no one would be able to wipe that studpid ass smirk off of his face. it does mess with him a bit, though, because come on - calling him your husband??? but he’d try his best to act unaffected, because it’s jeonghan, and he needs to be cool :))) (i’m going to repeat this so many times throughout this headcanon, but all of them would start to freak out a bit thinking about a day when this won’t be a joke anymore, hannie included)

❥ joshua

is he really surprised when you call him your husband? not really. he knows he’s a husband material, and you often make jokes about him being your husband anyways. that doesn’t mean he isn’t freaking about it on the inside, though, because no matter how many times you call him that as a silly little joke, it still makes him so incredibly happy that one day, he’ll really be your husband, and you won’t be calling him that as a joke anymore

❥ jun

one of the “turns into a shy, blushy, and a stuttering mess” squad. he’d malfunction at first, point at himself, and melt into a puddle of fluff, and love. one - how dare you call him your literal husband as a joke??? second - give him all the kisses, and hugs, because his first instincts is to run away, and break out in tears from all the love. he doesn’t really know what to do with himself after you say that word, but you can be sure it’ll be in his head for the rest of the day

❥ hoshi

soonyoung would be confused for a second, because “wait, are you talking about me?” and when he’d finally understand that, yes - you were talking about him (because who else would you be talking about), he’d get so smiley and giggly and shy, and just turn into the cutest bean. he’d immediately cling to you, wrapping his arms around you and trapping you in a warm hug, giggling like a maniac

❥ wonwoo

cue shy wonwoo with his lil cat smile. he can’t help the butterflies fluttering in his tummy, and as much as he’d want to tease you for calling him your husband, he’d be too shy to actually do it. you calling him that would make him so happy for some reason, even though he knows that you mainly do it as a prank or a joke to mess with him. don’t do it in front of people, though, or he’ll run away

❥ woozi

“anything for you, baby.�� woozi always indulges in all of your silly antics and jokes, and this time it’d be no different. he’d try to act as unaffected as he could, but his acting skills are not always the best, so you’d still be able to catch a glimpse of a small smile and blushy cheeks. he isn't the type to think about marriage, kids, and your domestic future together, he prefers to focus on what you have now, but hearing that word coming from you, would make his heart flutter a bit faster

❥ dk

“yes, i am.” smiles cutely at you, and gives you a bone crushing hug, while freaking the fuck out on the inside. he won’t comment on it too much in the moment, but the way he’d be extra clingy throughout the day, giving you ten times more kisses, and hugs, and pouts, and any physical affection. the thought of becoming your husband some day is so??? because it will happen someday, and that’s kind of crazy

❥ mingyu

cue mingoo giggles, because that man would not be able to behave himself after hearing the word husband from you. will whine, smile, laugh, hug you, pick you up and spin you around like a lovesick teenager, and when he finally calms down, he’d give you the biggest smooch. even though you had marriage talks plenty of times before - you both knew you’d get married some time in the feature, hearing it from you - saying it so casually, messed with his heart so much

❥ minghao

as someone who has mentioned a couple of times before that he wants to get married, hearing the word “husband” coming from you would make him so so happy and giddy, to the point where he’d just stand there with a lovesick smile on his face, and the urge to hug and kiss the life out of you (he wouldn’t though, he has to keep his composure) (but don’t worry, he’d kiss your forehead and tell you how much he loves you) (all with an adorable blush covering his cheeks)

❥ seungkwan

turns into a shy and blushy mess. seungkwan’s first instinct is to hide his face in his hands or your neck, so you wouldn’t see the effect that the word had on him (even though you could clearly see how it affected him). then he’d probably proceed to yell at you (lovingly) for making such mean jokes (he wants to be your husband now, boyfriend is not enough)

❥ vernon

at first he would think that he had misheard you, so you’d have to repeat the word two or three more times, because why would you ever call him your husband? and when you’d clarify that, yes - you did say the word “husband”, and yes - it was directed to him, vernon would just stare at you with big eyes but no thoughts. you’d laugh at him immediately, because the lack of his reaction was even funnier than if he’d react. then he’d say “thank you” and proceed with the rest of his day with the word “husband” floating around his head

❥ chan

leechan.exe has stopped working. looks at you with the biggest puppy eyes, pointing at himself, as if he was asking if you were really talking about him. it’s so crazy to him that you’d call him that even as a joke, because hearing the word “husband” coming from you is??? hello??? and the fact that someday he’ll really be your husband??? you can expect chan to be a bit more clingy than he usually is (a bit more pouty too, because what do you mean you called him that as a joke?)

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dreamofjoys · 11 months

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You became drunk in the heartslaybul's dorm due to the amount of alcohol that Ace and Deuce had sneaked in - a mini party between the 3 of you. And now, your drunken state has been crying and begging to see your boyfriend, Malleus. The duo could only brace themself with what's going to happen next as they bring you to diasomnia's dorm, praying that your boyfriend would not strike them down with lightning after seeing your current state.

— c/w: Reader is drunk, crack(??? im bad at stuff like this haha lmk if it's funny enough), injuries, underage drinking

— a/n: As i was writing this, i recalled that there are similar fics like this out there but this is just my own version. happy reading!

"I want Malleus!" You cried out, banging both of your fist on the table as the duo stares at you with panic on their face.

"No no, you don't need Malleus. You are a strong and independent person without that scary-"

"Malleus is not scary!" A plate flew past Ace's ear, nearly hitting him if not for his excellent dodgy skills. "Should we just bring them to Malleus-senpai? Maybe he will be able to handle them." Deuce suggested, to which Ace was about to rebut back if not for the sudden loud cry and wailing coming from you.

"Mal-Malleus!Wh-where are you..." You tried standing up from the chair, only for your legs to start wobbling before falling onto the ground, your nose and knees hitting first. "Be careful!" Ace and Deuce hurriedly step forward, standing on either side of you and linking their arms under yours to lift you up from the ground. "MALLEUSSS!!!!!" You wailed, not caring about your friends who are staring at you weirdly, and perhaps, a little anxious. You didn't know what was going on, or what invoked you to suddenly throw a tantrum to see your boyfriend. You had already met him early morning when he offered to send you to class. But somehow, the alcohol managed to make you feel cloud nine, and you wanted nothing more then to just go to your boyfriend and bask into his embrace.

The duo could only look at each other sigh, mentally preparing themself for what's coming next as they accompany - well, assist - you to diasomnia dorm.

The walk to diasomnia was agonizingly long. You would trip on your own feet here and there, occasionally stopping just to breakdown about how much you want to see Malleus. Deuce would comfort you, saying that they are bringing you to see Malleus now. Ace would groan, trying to wreck his brain to find if there's any excuses that he can say to save both their sorry ass. Nonetheless, they tried to prolong the walk to your boyfriend's territory so as to prepare themselves mentally.

When the 3 of you had finally reach the entrance to Diasomnia dorm, the double doors swung open before either of you could knock on it. Right in front of you stands your boyfriend in all his glory, his dorm uniform having just ironed into perfection, his shoes polished perfectly with a shine that leaves everyone staring in awe. His gloves were washed with the most expensive softener, just so that you would be able to hold his hands in the upmost comfort.

Malleus knew that you were here before you even reach the doors. He was delighted that his beloved has came to visit him first, and was preparing to greet you with his fanged smile, the one that you love so dearly. Until he saw your drunk figure slumping on Deuce.

Upon finally seeing your boyfriend, you immediately pushed away the two that was supporting your stance, launching yourself forward to Malleus. If it wasn't for Malleus quick reflexes, you would have suffered from another fall again. "Malleus!" You beamed in delight, immediately wrapping your arms around Malleus's neck while he adjust you in his hold, carrying you in bridal style.

The smell of alcohol was quick to invade his sense, and it didn't take long for the prince to figure out what had happened. The duo was known for being trouble makers, they must have dragged you into one of their mischievous plans. "Are you okay?" Malleus asked, noticing that your happy facade was gone, replaced with a sad expression. You looked up to meet your lover's gaze, and his heart aches at the sight of your red teary eyes, cheeks and nose flushed as equally red as a tomato. Your lips starts wobbling as you break down for the nth time of the day.

"My knees....it hurts....Uwahhhh!! Malleus, i-it hurts!" Oh, if only you know how much your cries are hurting Malleus. He turns his attention to your knees, finally realising the ugly blue black bruise that was littered on your kneecaps with a hint of blood. Suddenly, a flash of lightning strikes onto the ground, right behind both Ace and Deuce. Both of them sweat profusely as they watch Malleus wiping off the stray tears on your cheeks, whispering sweet nothings into your ear to calm you down.

When you finally fell asleep due to exhaustion, the duo was truly trying to prepare for the worst. They finally noticed how tall Malleus was, his figure looming over them, shadow long and big enough to engulf both of them in darkness. Malleus was strong enough to just carry you with one arm without any struggles. The hand that was previously wiping away your tears has now shift to the side of your head, guiding it to rest on his shoulder. His hand were large enough to almost cover your whole face, and he takes advantage of this fact to protect your head.

The duo gulps, finally getting to witness firsthand how protective Malleus is over you, and just how scary he is. "There will be no second time." Malleus's words cuts through the atmosphere like a knife. His tone was cold and deadly, with a hint of bloodlust. If anything, it doesn't help how Malleus's green slitted eyes constricts in the dark, that terrifying glare will hunt the poor heartslaybul students forever as they start to apologise profusely, before running off to god knows where.

Malleus scoff, finally glad that he was alone with you again. Teleporting the both of you to his room, Malleus climbs onto the bed with you, laying your body on his bed. Your head has been shifted to rest on his muscular thighs while he sits up to lean his back on the bedframe. With a snap of his fingers, magic blooms around you, and he had you changed to a comfortable night gown. The bruises on your knees were long gone as if they were never there in the first place.

He stares at your sleeping figure, a smile suddenly creeping up onto his face when he realised how cute you are when you sleep. You were quite adorable when you were drunk too, clinging onto him as if your life depended on him. He would have entertained you even more if not for your injuries. Malleus chuckles to himself, his hand wandering to your face, pinching at your soft cheeks before travelling back to your head, letting his finger comb through your soft locks.

He already had a concrete plan on how to deal with the duo. But for now, he just wants to spend some time with you, and take care of your needs.

#twisted wonderland #malleus draconia #dreamofjoystwst #imagines #y/n #diasomnia #twst malleus #twst malleus draconia #malleus hcs #malleus x reader #malleus x you #malleus x y/n #malleus x yuu #twst x reader #twst wonderland #alcohol

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hyuckswoman · 12 days

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alumnusbf!mark helping you study

pairing: alumnus mark (who’s also your bf) x reader

genre: fluff

summary: you’re stressing over this one subject until your bf appears

“fucking hell” you mutter, your finals were in a week and you were currently studying the subject you have been dreading since the beginning of the study period. Studying for exams was not fun. Especially when you had this gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach telling you that you were 100% going to fail.

markie

hey babe, you busy?

upon hearing the notification, you cursed at yourself as you swore you put your phone on do not disturb to avoid distractions .Yet here you were grabbing it to check the notification. turns out you did put your phone on do not disturb but since your boyfriend (who had to practically beg you to get removed off there texted you) was the origin of the notification, your phone still notified you.

being too lazy to write back, you just decided to call him

“hey, what’s up? I’m studying for my finals right now” you say after greeting him “oh really? I’m sorry to disturb then, how long have you been studying?” your boyfriend mark asks “hours. i literally had a full on mental breakdown studying the course because i suck at it and it feels like no matter how hard I study I just keep on failing” you say sighing “did you cry?” mark asks, maybe he knows you a little too well. “yea” you sigh yet again, it bothered you to see how big of a toll your academics were taking on you

“that’s a good thing then! wait no I don’t mean you crying is a good thing I meant it’s a good thing I’m on my way with food and stuff to give you a break” your boyfriend says making you laugh “mark, look I really truly appreciate it but I also really need to study” you say. honestly seeing how fucked you were because of this one course you couldn’t allow any distractions, and lord knows mark was a pretty big one

“no I know, we’ll just eat and then I’ll help you study. trust when I’ll leave you’ll be back in your academic weapon antics” mark says. after weighing your options (not that you had much of a choice seeing as though he was already on his way) you figured that maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea. you had the chance of having a boyfriend who already graduated which meant he already passed this course so maybe it’d actually help

“hi babe, i brought food” your boyfriend says, you were glad you had a boyfriend that supported your big backed antics. “i might make you my male wife at this point” you said as he hugged you. you guys then decided to turn on the tv and put a show none of you cared about for the sole purpose of having some background noise.

“okay, we’ve been slacking off for long enough, let’s get to studying now” your boyfriend says. you almost forgot about your finals for a second.

“okay, we’re done making the flash cards, quiz time” mark says quietly laughing upon seeing your face. “every right answer you get, i’ll kiss you” he says finding a way to motivate you as you looked like you were on the verge of dying. “I don’t think it helps, you distract me too much. i’ll probably only remember the kisses and not the actual class material” you reply. As much as it didn’t look like it you were seriously (for once) in the mood to study, you couldn’t let this pretty man distract you no more.

a short while after you were thrown over your desk defeated because what do you mean you only got like half the questions right???

“I don’t understand I’ve spent literal hours trying to memorize this shit I’m sick of it I just want it to be over” you sigh, this is the first time you’ve struggled this much over a school subject. usually being a bit above average doesn’t require you a lot of efforts so you never really tried that hard to pass your classes throughout the years. college beat the shit out of you tho!! you found yourself completely taken aback by the difficulty and you had to learn how to properly study throughout the years. if somebody asked you, you’d say you’ve got studying covered but seeing how this study session was going maybe you didn’t…

“I think you’re getting those wrong because you don’t understand this part” mark says patting your head as you mumble an ‘i know’. being the very considerate boyfriend he is, he then proceeded to explain the entirety of the material, dumbing it down whenever you looked up at him confused or when your eyebrows frowned a little too much. he also was so very patient, explaining the same things to you three different times as you had already forgotten what he said as soon as he moved on to another topic.

the dedication mark put into your academics was just too much for your heart to handle, you loved him so much and the fact he didn’t mind spending his evening studying with you instead of doing literally anything else warmed your heart. that’s why you didn’t have it in you to tell him you were getting gradually sleepier and were fighting your mind to stay awake because how could you when he looked so good concentrated trying to explain to you what you deem as the most incomprehensible subject ever.

“y/n? i feel like I’m losing your attention are you- oh.” mark says finally looking up from your study sheets seeing you asleep on your desk “pft, I didn’t know I was this boring damn” he laughs. since you were already in your pajamas and were in a position where the man could not carry you to bed he decided to gently shake you to wake you up “hm? I’m sorry I fell asleep markie, thank you for studying with me I love you. let me read the cards again to make sure I understand better” you say your voice a bit groggy “what? no go to sleep, nothing you read now will be effective just rest and sleep will take care of the memorizing for you” mark says preparing your bed for you “okay but only if you join me” you say already laying down under your covers “of course dude, let me put the things away and I’ll join you” mark says as he looks over to your half awake self that’s seemingly waiting for him

being in front of your final paper makes you realize even more how lucky you are to have mark in your life because you knew damn well that if the study session never happened you would have been shitting bricks internally crying over how much you don’t understand but now you got out of the final feeling confident you didn’t fail. you ran up to mark who was waiting for you to celebrate final period being over and he couldn’t help but mimic your immense grin as you told him how the final went better than what you had expected and thanked him for his help. He did refute by telling you it was all you and your mind but settled on taking a little bit of credit after you threatened him.

it was kinda crazy how mark made everything easy, every single thing without exception. looking at your boyfriend eating his meal you couldn’t help but smile thinking about how much you loved that man and how lucky you were to have him in your life.

#mark lee #mark x y/n #mark x you #mark x reader #mark fluff #mark imagines #mark drabbles #nct dream #nct dream drabbles #nct drabbles #nct #nct 127 #nct fluff #nct imagines #nct mark #kpop

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lyssak09 · 1 month

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when will you post yandere rick grimes 💕

Now 😂. I hope you and everyone else enjoy this! If you enjoy this please like, repost, and or follow me! Happy reading everyone 💙

Rick has always been attached to you, more so than he is to others, and it got worse when Lori died.

Ever since Lori died he’s been watching you like a hawk, even when you don’t realize it. Watching you sleep is both comforting and peaceful to him.

It makes his heart swell when he sees you taking care of Judith and Carl. Even if you didn’t like kids at first, Carl and Judith were different, and they needed a maternal figure. Which you happen to become without knowing.

After his mental breakdown, he starts to understand why he is doing certain things for you and why he has these feelings. It's because he loves you, more than anything.

And no, you’re not a rebound. His relationship with Lori wasn’t doing well and he already felt something for you when he first met you. It just wasn’t noticeable yet.

He becomes extremely protective of you, even paranoid. Rick will give you the safest jobs in the prison. Such as helping him with the garden, watching the kids, cleaning up cleared sections of the prison, and so on.

If you get too close to the walker gate he’ll flip. Yelling at you and killing multiple walkers (Who couldn’t even get to you really). Rick might start chaperoning your daily walks or observing from a distance because of the walkers.

You won’t be given scavenging missions. Even if you volunteer for one he’ll say no and have someone else do it. If you ask him why he doesn’t let you anymore he’ll just say “It's safer for you, and without you, Judith and Carl and so many of us would be lost without you.” Manipulative right?

He may go to great lengths to ensure that he is always a part of your life, even if it means manipulating situations or lying to keep you close.

He’s good at manipulation, I mean, it helped out a lot back when he was a sheriff. He’ll manipulate situations that cause you to be close to him or work with him, even though you already spend a lot of time with him, especially because of Judith and Carl.

Rick will also manipulate you, and your feelings. He’ll use fear, kindness, guilt, and so on to keep you with him. Maybe even try to make you dependent on him by manipulating you.

“You don’t understand, you’re the only mother figure Carl and Judith have now. You are too important and special to us, to me, to go risk your life on a scavenging mission, Y/N. Now why don’t you go help Carl with his schoolwork, he’s been asking for you. We can talk about this more later.”

You will not discuss it more later.

Rick will become extremely jealous. To the point, he’ll either subtly isolate you by giving everyone very different jobs from yours, or he’ll even quietly sabotage your relationships with others.

If someone shows even the slightest hint of interest in you he’s coming to mess it up.

“Listen here friend, I’ve noticed you’ve taken a liking towards Y/N. You should know that she’s taken, and wouldn’t go for someone like you in the first place,”

Did I forget to mention that you’re taken? By Rick?

You don’t know it but you’re in a relationship with him, whether you like it or not. Don’t get me wrong, Rick does understand that you two aren’t ‘technically’ together, yet. But that doesn’t mean you won’t be.

You’ll be his wife eventually, you just don’t know it yet.

Rick likes to keep mementos of you and his kids on him and likes to have some to decorate his cell, which makes it more like a home.

Found a pretty flower on your walk with Judith and want him to have it? It’ll be found pressed in one of his favorite books. He’ll borrow Glenn’s camera to take photos of Carl and Judith, making sure to get some with you in a few as well. He’ll make someone take a photo of all four of you, it’s a family portrait in his eyes.

Rick isn’t just overprotective of you because of your safety. But he is also paranoid that someone might take you from him. Anyone who gets too close to you might be seen as a threat, and he’ll have a plan to eliminate them if needed.

As time goes on his love for you grows and grows to a terrifying amount.

He’ll start to get violent if things are going his way, such as you not being affectionate back, you not realizing you’re supposed with him, or you’re being super oblivious. It makes him frustrated and angry, this shouldn’t be that hard for you! You two are meant to be! He’ll break things, take his anger out on walkers, or even yell at people in the group (even if they haven’t done anything).

He won’t ever hurt you, on purpose anyway, he would have to either been pushed to the edge or be going through another mental breakdown for him to hurt you.

Rick will be violent towards others though.

I think Rick could understand what he is doing is technically immoral, but he doesn't care, he’s doing this because he loves you. Or, I think Rick, who has been through so much trauma, is so delusional that he doesn't think he is doing anything wrong. You're his soulmate. Soulmates should be together. No matter what

Either way, he loves you more than life itself. He loves you more than he ever did Lori. He understands that now.

Despite his unhealthy behavior he genuinely believes that he’s doing this for your best interest, only he can keep you safe in this new world.

Rick knows everything about you, from your daily routines to your likes and dislikes.

The group is becoming concerned by his behavior, but they’re also a little too freaked out to mention it yet.

On the outside, it looks like Rick is a strong capable leader. But on the inside a darker unstable side of him lurks.

Rick becomes so dependent on you for his sense of identity and purpose that he can't imagine life without you. He believes that you’re soulmates destined to be together forever, and he'll do anything to ensure that you never part.

Another way Rick keeps you ‘safe’ isolates you is by gaslighting you. He’ll purposely allow you to almost get hurt, which he hates doing but it's to prove you need him, then he’ll save you. Even though you can handle yourself pretty well against walkers he’ll find ways to almost have you get hurt so he can save you and prove that you need him to protect you. Rick will gaslight you to no end. “You say you can handle walkers but every time you and I encounter them you almost get hurt or die. Now that's not handling them. It’s okay that you need help against them. I’ll always be here to protect you Y/N.”

He uses your relationship with Carl and Judith to his advantage. When you’re spending time with them or taking care of them he’ll come and join you or watch with a tiny smile on his face, this is one of the many situations he uses to spend time with you.

Rick is also secretly coaching Judith to call you mama, the thought of leaving him and his kids could never cross your mind if that's how they feel about you.

Carl starts to see you as a mom without Rick’s coaching. You helped take care of him and helped him grieve his mom. You help remind him that he’s still a kid, he gets to act more like one because of you. Carl will make it known to you that without you he’d have to grow up faster again and stop getting to act like his age again. Him telling you this helps Rick, not that Carl knows about it. Again, how could you leave them? Carl shouldn’t have to lose another mother figure, especially one that actually lets him be a kid. And it wouldn’t be fair to Judith for her to lose the woman who’s been caring for her since she was born.

Once you do catch on to Rick’s feelings and intentions and if you try to leave him he’ll remind you of these facts, that Carl and Judith can’t lose you too.

He’s the king of manipulation at this point.

Rick’s obsession with your safety is insane. To the point, he’ll risk his own well-being for you. I mean, that's what husbands are supposed to do, right? If food is running low he’ll give up his share to you and Carl, no matter how much you disagree or fight him on it.

Rick will never let you go or give you up. Even in the face of rejection or betrayal, Rick refuses to let go of you. He’ll become increasingly desperate and unstable, resorting to drastic measures to maintain his grip on you, including threats of violence or self-harm.

He may develop obsessive rituals or routines centered around you, such as constantly checking in on you, always eating with you, watching you sleep, or even hoarding items that remind him of you. These rituals help to reinforce his ‘connection’ to you Y/N.

Rick is extremely touchy, like oh my god. When he’s around you some part of him needs to be touching you. Like when you help him with the garden, he’ll guide your hands when planting or have a hand on the small of your back while he points out where he wants to add to the prison. He ‘accidentally’ brushes against you all the time.

When you’re sitting down and feeding Judith he’ll have a hand on your shoulder, he loves it when he has to squeeze behind you to get past you and he brushes against your backside, totally not because of inappropriate reasons.

He likes to look for things for you and the kids when he’s out scavenging. Giving you things is one of the ways he shows you he loves you, even though may not realize he’s doing it for that. Rick is in search of a wedding ring for you, he’s going to marry you, and you’re destined to be together.

If he’s scavenging with Daryl and they go past a jewelry store he’ll send Daryl ahead and meet him at their original destination. Rick just has to make a quick pitstop.

Once he finally confesses or you notice his behavior, he’ll expect you to finally realize that you’re together and will happily marry him. If you try to say no or gently get him out of the delusions he won’t take it well. Possibly falling into the delusions more, especially if you’re not getting you’re meant to be his and he was meant to be yours. Rick will explain your reactions with more delusions or false logic.

“You just don’t see it yet Y/N, we’re meant to be together. You’ll see it soon.

If push comes to shove he’ll make you his by force. Either clearing a secret part of the prison and preparing it for him, his kids, and his future wife. He’ll lock you in said cell block if needed. If that idea doesn’t work then Rick will find a nice secluded home somewhere for you guys. Hopefully, you’ll be compliant though so you guys won’t have to leave your new home everyone worked so hard on.

Rick rationalizes his behavior with twisted logic, convincing himself that everything he does is for Y/N's own good. He believes that he's protecting you from the dangers of the world and that she needs him to survive.

He’ll go to great lengths for you, including getting rid of anyone or anything in the way. Maybe that's why some of your fellow survivors haven’t come back from scavenging missions Rick sent them on?

Rick loves you more than anything Y/N, remember that.

“I love you with all my heart darlin, don’t ever forget that.” Rick declared with a smile, blood dripping down his face,

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere male #yandere headcanon #yandere the walking dead #yandere twd #the walking dead #twd #rick grimes #yandere rick grimes #rick grimes x reader #yandere rick grimes x reader #miss blue writing #rick grimes x you #yandere rick grimes x you

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stardustizuku · 3 months

Text

I’ve recently been thinking on why there’s people who interpret Kuro in such a drastically different way.

And something I notice is that you can easily tell how someone experiences the series, based on what they think of the GWA.

The way you interpret the Green Witch Arc is indicative of of how you have been interpreting the story so far, and how you’ll interpret it going forward

Generally, there’s two interpretations:

1.- The Reaction Ciel had to the mustard gas, are his true feelings coming afloat

2.- The Reaction Ciel had to the mustard gas, isn’t how he feels.

The first interpretation (and I’m really not trying to be mean about it this time) comes from a very, uhm, shall I call it Teenage-Like? mindset of how pain and trauma works.

I call it Teenage-Like, because I’ve seen it in mostly literature aimed at teenagers, be it fanfics or YA. It comes from an inability for teenagers to actually voice how they feel towards their parents. A helpless feeling of being ignored.

I don’t wanna point fingers but this is the basis of a lot of Self Harm tendencies (physical, emotional, psychological, or others like EDs or digital self harm) come from. A need for people to notice you are in pain. But because you feel like you cannot voice it yourself (or don’t deserve it, it can vary) you start to lash out. Put yourself in higher risks, to have someone find out there is something wrong with you.

So the moment the main character finally breaks down, or has a moment of weakness, it’s interpreted as someone finally being truthful.

This is how Ciel’s reaction is interpreted by the first half.

The mustard gas is simply a trigger of pain, that causes all of Ciel to unravel. He’s in pain right now, cause he’s always in pain. He’s avoidant to Sebastian, cause he’s always been scared of him. He doesn’t trust him. He doesn’t trust adults. Finny is the only one who actually cares.

This makes the fact that Sebastian ,essentially, slapped him to get him to react, come off as cruel.

The boy is finally being honest, and you just tell him he’s being childish? Horrible.

Obviously, that’s not my interpretation.

Okay so, what happens once you’re not a teenager? Once you don’t have an adult figure to take care of you? What happens once you start avoiding telling your parents the pain you’re in, not because you think they won’t care, but because they’ll care too much and get worried and you don’t want them to get worried?

You start to realize pain is not the end of the world.

While, when being a teenager, getting sick meant someone gets to take care of you and maybe notice you aren’t okay, as an adult getting sick potentially means - not going to work. Which means your won’t have money to buy food, which means you’ll probably go hungry.

So getting sick becomes less of a way to get away from the responsibilities you have, and more of a burden.

That’s why you’ll see, in media aimed at adults,mental breakdown less depicted as an opportunity to be honest, and more of a sickness that needs to be healed.

You can have a more honest and truthful conversation, while you are sound of mind. There’s no power dynamic between friends, like it would with adult figures and children. So this song and dance, isn’t necessary.

You don’t have to be sick to be understood. And your friends will rather try to help you, than understand you when you’re suffering. That’s the nature of adult relationships.

This is more or less the framing that comes from Ciel’s breakdown (in the second interpretation).

The Mustard Gas isn’t showing Ciel’s true nature - it’s showing Ciel at his most vulnerable. This means, not in his sound mind.

Saying things he normally wouldn’t, hurting people he normally would hold close, and clinging to people he generally would never try to get close to.

Simply put, it isn’t just “a bit of pain to make him unravel” but a “Ciel is getting psychologically tortured by a weapon used for chemical warfare”.

He’s past being honest. He’s having such a severe reaction, that he cannot function. He’s being tortured and broken, to the point he is no longer himself.

He isn’t being “truthful” he’s scared.

And fear can make you do things that, in your sound mind, you would never do.

The point is that, Ciel isn’t saying what he truly feels or being “honest”. It’s him scared out of his mind, saying everything and anything to make the fear stop.

And the biggest proof is how he treats Sebastian.

The fact that Ciel asks Sebastian to “go away” or “not come near” is perhaps the most glaring reason as to how badly this Gas messed with him.

I’ve said this before but to Ciel, Sebastian is a lifeline. He’s the only tool he has for his revenge. The thing that, even after he lost r!Ciel, he was willing to sacrifice it all to achieve.

And at this point in time, Sebastian is also the only emotional anchor Ciel has.

As far back as the second episode, Ciel has asked Sebastian to stay. Even when he’s having flashbacks, even when he’s having an episode. In fact, Sebastian leaving him is a great source of anxiety - since as seen in BoC in the Asthma Scene, without him Ciel feels powerless enough to die.

He feels more protected with him, because he KNOWS Sebastian will protect him and that Sebastian will follow his orders.

Again going with the analogy of a dog - He feels more comfortable having the chained beast by his bed, simply bcs others are trying to hurt him and the beast won’t eat him right now.

So him asking Sebastian to go away, is throwing away his biggest safety net for a surrogate for r!Ciel, just means he’s reverting to the mentality he had during the cult.

If Sebastian is constantly telling him “it’s okay, they can’t hurt you anymore, you’re outside the cage, you can do what you WANT”

Ciel clinging to Finny is him going “no, im staying in the cage bcs at least the cage is familiar”

And no matter what the first camp tells you, staying in the cage, trapped inside your pain ISNT the healthy option.

(We could argue Ciel’s need for revenge rather than healing is also unhealthy, but no one in the second camp would even call Ciel anything other than a villain in someone else’s story)

So, Sebastian slapping him and going “no, that’s not what you want”, isn’t as cruel as it would be in the first interpretation. Because as we see, he’s right. That’s not what Ciel wants. And it’s proved by the next scene where Sebastian talks to Ciel about what he truly wants.

Rather than Sebastian telling Ciel to “get over it”, it’s closest to a “snap out of it, something’s wrong”

This is further proved by the fact that, Sebastian first instinct isn’t to scare him. He does back away, he does try to wait and gently coax him. But Ciel literally cannot reason with him.

That small but significant difference in interpretation has wildly different outcomes in how you perceive both, the characters and the story.

If you pick the first, you’re reading Sebastian as an enemy. Someone who does not respect Ciel. You see his attempt to eat Ciel’s soul as a breach of trust, and proof that he doesn’t care for him.

But if you pick the second option, you see Sebastian as an ally. Someone who’s running out of time and ways to save Ciel. His actions, while crass, ultimately help Ciel. What he was trying to do, was help.

Yana, very clearly, wanted the second interpretation. However, I cannot, in good conscience, tell you it’s the only interpretation. People are free to pick and chose how they read the text, irrelevant of how little of the actual text they’re reading.

But I will say, picking the first is symbolic of a less mature way of thinking. Common on those who like to infantilize trauma and trauma responses. It’s the easy, safe and comforting way of reading the text. As I said, it’s common in those who want their pain to be acknowledged.

That reading of Kuro is one that speak to me, that you’re not really ready to confront pain. And someone with that mentality, is not someone who’s reading of the text I find particularly interesting. Sure, you can share it, I’ll never stop you, but know you’re speaking to me in an entirely different language. You’re interpreting the text so differently, that I don’t think it’s even the same text anymore.

Again, you’re essentially writing analysis on fanfiction. And I’m not all too interested in dissecting your own trauma sloppily painted over British Aesthetic.

#kuroshitsuji #black butler #sebaciel #this is a bit less refined than both the Twitter thread i wrote and other essays #but I had to share my thoughts on this

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relatableblorbopoll · 6 months

Text

Round 1 of preliminaries, group 11

The first two places get a place on the bracket

Little reminder: there will be 2 more rounds of preliminaries, the losing blorbos of this poll still have 2 chances of getting in the official bracket

Propaganda under the cut

Mae Borowski (Night in the Woods)

"Spoilers! She's a college dropout in her early twenties, who suffers from untreated mental illness and dissociation and had a complete breakdown at college, causing her to come home. Now she's living with her parents again, but life in her dingy little hometown went on without her. Her friends are adults now - in a relationship and planning on moving to the big city, or having to waste away in a dead end job instead of following their dreams. Mae is the only one without a new adult role in life. She's not great with people either - she's blunt and often doesn't think things through, and in many ways just doesn't get the world of adults. She's also prone to petty crimes and general anarchy. She's kind of lost and purposeless, and trying to find meaning in life by desperately clinging to the past. Her decision to drop out of college probably saved her life, but it's also put her family in a tough financial situation and is viewed by most people as her just thoughtlessly doing whatever she wants. She's also kind of shamed a lot about not having a job or other productive role in life, despite the fact that her untreated mental issues are actually disabling for her. She also plays the bass real bad. Anyway, i love Mae a lot. Playing this game as a college dropout in my early twenties, sitting in my childhood bedroom in my mom's attic, back in my dingy little hometown, desperately missing my old friends who have all moved on to better, resposible things in life... yeah, it felt like the game was pointing dead at me. Given tumblr's general demographic, i figure i must not be completely alone in this"

Shigeo Kageyama / Mob (Mob Psycho 100)

"autistic. likes milk. if we reach a certain level of emotion we turn into a psychic bomb. cool brothers :)"

Barry the Quokka (The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog)

"Their only skill is working the microwave, they're non-binary, when seeing a trash bin their first instinct is to look through it, they're always the most normal person in the room, they can beatbox, and they were only hired due to being the only one who applied."

Kaveh (Genshin Impact)

"In a fantasy world, be a guy with a regular profession losing his goddamn mind. Poor guy has a guilt complex, (so true) and a lot of deep embarrassment regarding his life.(ehe) He just wants to do what he's passionate about but capitalism is evil and also he keeps getting scammed. Claims to not want anyone to know Things, goes into depth about these Things anyway. Is probably most definitely gay. Can be found face down on a table lamenting his fate. Terrible sleep schedule. (HA) He is such a guy. Wants to believe the world is a good place and people are inherently good. And wants to help people and do good himself. It's just hard. [And he has a roommate. Oh my god he has a roommate]"

"He was, and still is, regarded a genius. He aced his Akademiya days, he has the admiration and appreciation of so many people because he is oh-so remarkable. But what for, when reality is that he sits at home depressed and with guilt consuming him, faking the image people have of him, not only broke as fuck but actually in debt, drowning his sorrows in wine."

Yusuke Kitagawa (Persona 5)

"highschooler who wants to spend the rest of his life doing what he loves. is obsessed with art and beauty and it's on his mind 24/7 received help from his now friendgroup to break from his abusive foster father who he still have complicated feelings with had to move into school dorms and am struggling to live independantly since he'd rather spend money and time on his art but he's still surviving and enjoying the good times id say also ends up saying whatever is on his mind and is pretty eccentric. very passionate about what he loves. doesn't want to do anything else."

Nanami Kento (Jujutsu Kaisen)

"Ex-salaryman, now jujutsu sorcerer. During one life-and-death fight, kept talking about how it was almost six pm with is when he is getting off work at 6pm no matter what because he hates overtime. While his opponent repeatedly almost kills him. Normalest adult in this shonen anime. Teen MC: "Let's go all out!" Nanami: "No. Where moderate effort will suffice, use moderate effort." Some of his quotes from the anime: "I studied at Jujutsu Tech and one thing I learned is that Jujutsu Sorcerers are shit! Then I worked at your typical company and one thing I learned is that work is shit! If both are equally shit I'll take the one I'm more suited to." "You've faced several life-or-death situations, but that does not make you an adult. Finding more fallen-out hairs on your pillow, watching your favourite stuffed bread disappear from the convenience store... The accunulation of these little despairs is what makes a person an adult." "I don't praise or disparage anyone. I adhere to facts and judge on that basis. That's who I am. There was a time when I mistakenly believed society operated the same way." "

#preliminaries #tumblr polls #tumblr tournament #character bracket #character tournament #mae borowski #night in the woods #shigeo kageyama #mob psycho 100 #barry the quokka #the murder of sonic the hedgehog #kaveh #genshin impact #yusuke kitagawa #persona 5 #nanami kento #jujutsu kaisen

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zvtara-was-never-canon · 3 months

Note

Have you noted that no one from Azula's family was shown to express love and affection towards her?

That is mostly true. Ozai's affection is clearly conditional (and full on manipulation at worse, like we see in the finale), Ursa canonically favors Zuko to the point that we never see her spending any alone time with Azula like she did with Zuko, and while Iroh gave her a toy like he did to Zuko the toy in question was so OBVIOUSLY wrong for a kid like Azula that it's comical AND show's he did not really know his niece at all.

But there is a constant exception.

Zuko's relationship with Azula is complicated. He clearly admires her strength and power, but he hates how she uses it. She lied to him many times, was seen apparently cheering Ozai on during the Agni Kai, tried to have him imprisoned and even said she'd celebrate being an only child - and then allows him to come home as a hero after Ba Sing Se, even though SHE had the control of the Dai Li and was not yet aware Aang could have survived, meaning she had nothing to gain from it.

And when she lets him know that if he's caught talking to Iroh people might think he is a traitor too, and explicitly says "Believe it or not, I'm actually looking out for you" Zuko drops his innitial suspicion that she wanted something and that's why she was helping him.

On The Beach, he just follows her when she say their old family home is depressing and they shouldn't waste their time there. When she's asking him who she is angry at, she mentions herself and Zuko explicitly says that is not the case.

He doesn't trust her and know she has a tendency to mock or full on lie to him... yet when he wants to know about Fire Lord Sozin he asks her about it, and lets it slide when she mocks him by saying he should make sure the royal painter got his good side - for a character as quick to anger as Zuko, that is a big deal. In Nightmares and Daydreams he also goes to her to find out if he'll be allowed at the war meeting.

More importantly:

1 - Iroh's infamous "She's crazy and needs to go down" line was only said because ZUKO, without anyone putting that idea in his head before, suddenly went "I know what you're going to say. She's my sister and I should be trying to get along with her"

2 - Zuko only jumped into the fight in Ba Sing Se when Azula was being cornered by Aang and Katara.

3 - Zuko looked genuinely shocked and even distressed when she was falling off that cliff. He just sounded so shaken saying "She's... not gonna make it..."

4 - In the writer's own words, Zuko felt no hate but only pity when seeing her breakdown. Katara tried to comfort him because, canonically, even though Zuko and Azula are enemies, this was never what he wanted because he still sees her as family. That's why the Last Agni Kai's music is not the epic you'd expect from a battle, but a tragic one.

5 - Aaron Ehasz, the lead writter for the show, probably the person with the most influence after Bryke, has REPEATEDLY said that he always felt Azula should have gotten a redemption arc, Zuko being an Iroh figure to give her advice and be the only one still by her side when all else was seemingly lost to her forever.

Even the comics (most of which I HATE, mainly because Azula's storyline checks nearly every box for "the mentally ill are inherently evil/less human, so it's fine if literally every other person on the planet mistreats them") didn't fully abandon their complex dynamic.

Zuko is not a perfect sibling, and for a long chunk of the story he seemed too focused on his own issues for Azula to ever be a factor in his mind (aside from the moments in which she was a potential/explict threat), but he DOES still feel a sense of obligation towards her, to the point that it made him do something no one else in their family had done before or since - actually look at Azula. Not the prodigious daughter/perfect weapon, or the problem child that is difficult to handle, or the pontentially deadly enemy that was in the way, but Azula.

His 14-year-old sister that got on his nerves a lot, was far from the kindest person alive, and that he had a ton of issues with, but that he could never fully hate or even be indifferent to. Because she's family. Because he remembers a happier time in which the gap between them didn't seem so big. Because if things had been slightly different he could have been her. Because he went from wanting to be her to seeing just how miserable her life ended up being - especially compared to the one he now had - and feeling deeply sorry for her.

Now if you guys excuse me, I'm gonna go cry in the corner. Have some wholesome/bittersweet fanart if you wanna cry too.

#azula meta #zuko meta #fire siblings #fire siblings meta

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writersmess · 8 months

Note

Ok, first of all

I LOVED the buck fanfic you wrote the other day, my heart...melting! So, I came back with a New idea! (If you want it, of course)

Now. Season 6 Was a rollercoaster of emotions, especially when buck got Hit by lighting. What if his fiance (from your other work) is by him day and night, being all calm and optimistic, knowing buck. And when he finally draws his first breath all alone, she just falls on her knees, crying and finally letting it all out what she held back all this time?

Now, if you don't want to do it, just simply skip 😊 no one forces you. Anyway! Have a great time and take Breaks, think about yourself.

COME BACK (TO REALITY) | EVAN BUCKLEY

Pairing: Evan Buckley x fem!reader

Summary: After being proposed to by Buck in the middle of the night, you didn’t expect an accident to change the course of your lives.

Warning: Mental breakdown, crying, hospital, mention of being struck by lightning.

Word count: 1.5k

a/n: oh my god, I didn’t think it would take me so long to get back. these months have been so crazy at work, I’ve been doing crazy shifts and I’m trying to get my social life back together again. I’ve missed writing for our troublemaker boy.

I hope you enjoy it!!! And I apologize if there’s any mistakes, English is not my first language.

It can be read as a sequel to Vivid Dream.

Masterlist

...........................................

“buck had an accident, we’re at the hospital”

All it took was one message to turn your life upside down.

It’s funny how life is a great well of irony. you spend half of your life by yourself, sometimes hoping to find your soulmate, sometimes not. and then you find them. and they’re everything you didn’t even know you were looking for.

It was amazing how you and buck matched but at the same time were so different. you were adorable. had the warmest and the most welcoming smiles and hugs, and the best advice anyone could ever need. and you were determined, you knew what you wanted for your future, ever since you were a kid. and buck, well, it was buck. the boy who ran away in the hope of finding himself and finding the true meaning of happiness.

which he didn’t imagine that it would be in those sparkling eyes of yours or in that sincere smile on your lips.

and you also didn’t expect to find it so soon in a man like buck. so spontaneous, with such a beautiful smile, and with such a traumatic past.

and that was your fiancé now.

after proposing at 4am in the middle of a shift. with no ring and definitely with no preparation, but with the greatest love that could fit inside of that heart full os scars of him.

“going on a call. love you”

The opened and unanswered message screamed in the car holder as you drove through the dark and empty streets of L.A.

you didn’t know what to expect, what could have happened. you took deep and long breathes, your hands shaking as you gripped the steering wheel, your heart pounding.

“He was struck by lightning”

you knew all the risks that this job entailed, but this was something totally beyond your imagination. it was something impossible to predict.

you paced back and forth in the corner of the waiting room, not wanting to see the looks of pity from your friends. buck would be fine soon, he would face this like he faced everything else.

Eddie without saying a word stopped in front of you and waited until you noticed his presence, so he could hug you. and that’s exactly what you needed at the moment.

“only one of you can go and see him now”

before the doctor had finished his sentence you were at his side, walking with him to the room where your best friend, your fiancé, was.

and he was there. sedated. intubated. It’s like your world was one step away from falling apart. You’d never felt like this before, like control was out of your hands. you had it all figured out, all the plans, the dreams, the next steps, everything was millimetrically planned. and suddenly it wasn’t anymore. your eyes were on Buck lying on the gurney, in such a deep sleep, his face was confused, his frown slightly furrowed, as if he was in an argument, or frustrated.

a few days has passed and Buck’s condition was stable. the days had been grayer, your apartment was empty and you didn’t feel like working, at all. but you woke up every day, put a smile on your face and tried to be optimistic, you had faith that he would get well, he needed to. he needed to come back to you.

You didn’t know it, but 118 commented about you, they thought you were in a state of shock. you didn’t cry, quite the opposite, you always had a smile on your face. when someone was worried about Buck’s situation, you would put your hand on their shoulder and tell them that everything would be fine, that he would be back soon. Eddie was very worried. he knew you, and he knew that you were going to fall apart at any moment, and he hoped to be around when it happened.

you were coming into Buck’s room when you saw Chris talking to your unconscious fiancé, and your eyes automatically filled with tears. you kept quiet and stood in the corner watching the scene and could see Eddie drying his tears, and your heart sank. you needed the love of your life back, Eddie needed his best friend back, Chris needed his playmate back. Buck needed to come back, he needed to fill in the gaps that were open in so many hearts.

“hey buddy, how was your conversation with Buck?” you made yourself noticed when Chris finished talking to him and he smiled when he saw you.

“is he going to be okay right?” Eddie could see you trying hard to hold back the tears, something he didn’t even bother to hide anymore.

“of course sweety, he’ll come back to us”

***

it was mid-afternoon, you were sitting in the chair next to his bed, trying to read a book, when your mind started to take you to places you didn’t want to go. everything started coming at you hard, all these feelings. it was an anxiety crisis. you felt your heart pounding, difficulty in drawing in air, and tears began to fall.

you approached the bed and held tightly onto the hand of the man lying in that bed.

“babe I can’t do it anymore. I can’t put a smile on my face and pretend that everything is fine when it isn’t. I need you here with me. I know you’ll be fine, I know it. but Chris, Eddie, damn it, everyone, needs you back, we need you, I need you, and I don’t know how to go on without you here, I don’t know. So i need you to fight for me, for us, fight and win this battle babe, win it for me and don’t leave me, please don’t leave me”

And you couldn’t imagine it, but the other end of the line that connected Buck to this plan was in you. He clung to that, he clung to you, to the thought of having you again, and for that he fought, for you he broke the glass that separated him between dream and reality, between life and death, it was for you that everything was worth it. Because of you he would come back.

And he did it.

You could feel a grip on your hand, it was light, but it was there. your eyes widened and your heart skipped a beat. this couldn’t be a reflex, you couldn’t believe it was. and it really wasn’t, your Buck was coming back, he was reacting.

As if he’d sensed it, Eddie appeared in the room with the coffee he’d gone to grab, at the exactly moment your knees failed, and he held you.

“I-Is he...?”

“Hey hey, calm down”

You couldn’t complete the sentence, and before your friend could question you, you heard a weak cough, it was Buck, he really was there. back to you.

You were holding Buck’s hand as if your life depended on it, and to be honest, it kind of did. you, who had never fallen in love in your life, were completely surrendered to those blue eyes that you had begged to see again.

You didn’t notice the moment Eddie left the room, but when your eyes met Buck’s, you burst into tears. He couldn’t say much, and you didn’t even need or want him to try, he was there, that’s all that mattered at the moment. you had your head resting on your intertwined hands on the bed, and the sobs coming from your lips left the words stuck in your throat and in your mind. Buck slowly and painfully raised his trembling hand, reaching your head and resting his hand there.

He waited until you calmed down, and his chest tightened at the way you looked at him. your lips trembling and your face wet from the tears that kept falling down your cheeks.

“you’re back”

“for you” his voice was weak and hoarse.

“I never thought I could love someone the way I love you, buck. please don’t do it again, I know I can’t take it one more time” your voice was low and trembling.

“I proposed to you, I had to come back to make sure it would happen,” he whispered with that little smile on his lips.

“You idiot, you made me a promise to love me for the rest of my days, I was going to pick you up wherever you were,” you replied in a whisper and placed a light kiss on his lips, afraid of hurting him.

“I love you, and i’m going to keep that promise” he said and you nodded your head.

that intimate moment between you lasted only a few minutes, then the nurses and doctor entered the room to check on Buck and as soon as they allowed his friends to come in, the mess was made. there was laughter and loud conversation, happy hugs and stories about the day of the accident, you could hear “too soon?” too many times in a short period of time and all you could do was laugh.

You could see the happiness in your fiancé’s eyes as everyone gathered around, and you finally felt your heart calm down. he was really there, he came back to you and you could finally live out your vivid dreams together.

#911 imagine #evan buckley imagine #evan buckley x reader #911 fanfic #buck x reader #evan buck buckley

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marilynthornhilllover · 7 months

Text

Simply because, she cares

Larissa weems x fem reader

Warning: slight depressive talk, fluff and care

Larissa immediately knew something was wrong when your entered her office. There was simply a shift in the peaceful air of tension of the atmosphere. You sniffed as you slammed the door harshly the rage building back up as you stormed into your shared bedroom with larissa. Larissa lifted her gaze making brief eye contact with you. Her heart sank completely.

You looked like you wanted to curl up and die, you had tears in your eyes threatening to spill out as your nose flared, clearly showing that you were on the verge of having a mental breakdown. You quickly averted your eyes from her gaze and disappeared into the room slamming the door.

You felt tired, hopeless, depression, utterly exhausted beyond sleep fixation, and mostly worthless. Before you could even reach the bed a loud painful sob escaped you. Larissa's heart was deeply troubled, it was at that point she placed down her pen and got up from her seat.

She sighed as she took off her heels and her jacket. She slowly approached the door and softly knocked.

" my love?" Her voice was soft and filled with deep concern. True sympathy - one you never understood. Larissa's love for you ran deeper than the ocean. She truly cared, she truly loved, she truly protected and provided for you.

"Y/n please don't shut me out again.... darling?" You were getting more agitated by the second. You wanted her to be mad at you.... probably because you were mad at yourself, or maybe it's because everyone else was. You needed everyone one, including larissa to scold you for making mistakes and simply being human.

You were far to harsh on yourself, you knew that obviously but you found comfort in that pain. You were your biggest rival. There's times where your soul desperately wanted to be happy - needed to be happy but that everlasting pain was all you knew, all you ever felt. So that's why when larissa came into your life with so much love and joy, sympathy, understandment it was hard to accept it. It was hard to understand it.

You didn't even know why she loved you so much, as if you died she would be the loneliest woman on planet earth. Maybe it's because you don't quite understand what love is because you never had it or practiced it on yourself.

Larissa twisted the door nob then finding out that the door was unlocked, from there she gently sneeked her way in. There you were on the bed curled up into a small ball crying. Your mascara ruined and your face completely tear ridden. Larissas shoulders dropped, as if she wasn't expecting what she saw - again with the sympathy.

" Oh darling come here" she cooed gently sitting on the bed and tapping her lap. You looked up at her from the pillow, the mascara remains taking the stain on the white material. You looked at her deeply. Trying to figure out if you were one, dreaming or two maybe she was lying.

Her deep caring blue eyes stared back at yours, truth,meaning and love shined through them. She looked like she had all the answers to your troubles and problems and was willing to help if you would just let her in. You couldn't help the feeling of feeling like an equation. Waiting to be solved and placed away in a box and labeled as useless. But larissa would never do that.

No one hurts you more than yourself, your a big overthinker and that's the sharpest part of the knife for you. You sniff as you carefully got up and laid in her lap. Larissa laid back against the pillows and placed pulled you up with her, making you lay on her chest.

She doesn't say anything. The silence was killing you. You needed to know what she was thinking. If she thought she should divorce you, go on a break, take you to see a counselor, scold you for being the way you are. But again that's not who larissa is. That's not the woman who proposed, the woman who's vows where to love you even in your illness.... she simply cared for you and you didnt know why your heart refused to believe it.

As If she was reading your mind she spoke up, her voice cracking as though she shared your pain - felt your pain.

" rest your mind, my love, it's been quite mean to you" she whispered kissing your temple. And there it was. The kiss of love. Her soft voice and cold gentle finger tips running through your hair as you slowly started to drift off to sleep. Your body fought against it, larissa is busy and has better things to do, your disrupting her work, you own her an explanation. Oh shut up mind, you stopped fighting the sweet desire and fell stead fast asleep.

You were slowly brought back from your depth when you heard larissas sweet voice mumbling some sweet nothings in your ear while her nails lightly strached against your scalp. Somethings like ' I genuine love you' ' your pain is my pain' ' your ok in my arms'. Your heart felt weak and fluttered. You felt like your were in heaven.

You slowly opened your eyes, adjusting to the lighting of the dim light on the bed side table. It was most definitely past 6, which meant you were probably laying in larissa ls arms sleeping for atleast 2 hours. Larissa is a busy woman who has almost a thousand things to do and for her to chose to lay here with you will always be appreciated and cherished from the deepest depth of your heart.

" she's back, are you feeling OK my love?" It was a stupid and rhetorical question, she knew that. Obviously you weren't ok, you didn't even tell her what was the problem yet.

Tha pain of the world immediately came back to you, and she noticed it. It was as of sleep was your only escape but she wanted it to be her, and only her. She wanted you to trust her with all of your problems.

She took your chin in her fingers and brought your face up to hers, sapphire eyes piercing into your dark soul setting light upon it. She kissed your nose and you gaved her a faint smile before giggling when she proceeded to leave pecks of kisses all over your face. It's a good thing her lipstick is stain proof or your entire face would be red right now.

She chuckled as she left one final kiss to your forehead.

" since i've got you to smile and laugh what monsters have been clawing at you?" She asked sincerely, your smile faded quicker than it appeared as guilt and that never ending cycle of pain filled your beautiful eyes. Your eyes started to gloss over again as you avoided larissas inetesene and worried stare.

She quickly grabbed hold of your face and forced you to maintain eye contact but you pulled away. You quickly got up and stood facing away from her. Larissa sighed in defeat, she really thought she was making progress but still she was not mad at you. And will never be.

Not because she has to put up with it but simply because she cares.

" darling come here" she spoke softly voice breaking as tears filled her own eyes. When she got no response she stood, still keeping her distance, choosing to give you the acquired space you needed.

" please my love, y/n just tell me what the problem is your breaking my heart!" She shouted, not intentionally but she did. You looked up at the mirror infront of you, meeting her gaze quickly. She looked stressed, you were adding to her stress. Your pain hurts her as much as it hurts you and possibly even more, and if not it leaves her scared.

You turned around and slowly walked up to her before hugging her. Wrapping your arms around her neck as she wrapped hers completely around your waist pulling you in to get you as close as she can. Her body heat brought your peace and harmony. Happiness even. You felt refilled, refreshed.

Her hugs always give you hope and possibilitys.

"I'm sorry for shouting" she mumbled and you shook your head pulling back a bit.

" I get it your upset and stressed, I would shout as me too" you said handing your head low.

" that doesn't justify my actions y/n, I had no right to shout at you regardless of my emotions, as your partner i should have control of that and not get upset every time your broken" she spoke sternly. She held your hand and placed it over her chest. Feeling her heart beat you smiled and looked up at her.

" my heart beats for you by y/n/n, it whispers your name and this is not poetry I'm speaking the truth. When your sad I'm not like oh my gosh this shit again, no, I always wanna help you in everything and with everything, so please don't leave me in the dark" her words were like a soothing melody. You sighed and sat down on the bed pulling her with you.

" have you ever felt like the majority of the things that happen or are said to you are your fault" you asked her and she looks at you like she's either confused or doesn't know how to answer the question without making you feel worst about the situation.

"ok like, I dont know how to explain it" you said in defeat sighing. Larissa held your hands clasping your fingers with hers.

" you don't have to know the answer to every problem my love and that's ok. Life is a dark unfair exhausting mystery and on some days it might get darker and harder to find that spark of joy and happiness but just know I'm always by your side no matter what and your not in this alone" she whispered looking at your reaction to her every word carefully.

" thank you rissa, I love you and thanks for supporting me and always going that extra mile" you whispered. She chuckled rolling her eyes playfully.

" I'd travel to the end of the world for you" she cooed kissing your temple.

" promise me something darling" she said all of a sudden in a very serious tone. You turned your body in her direction, giving her your undivided attention just as she always does. She tucks a strand of hair behind your ear behind speaking up.

" stop being a monster to yourself." There's so much more she wanted to say, could have said but she chosed not to. She simply chosed to comfort you in this storm of pain and distress.

" I promise " you spoke confidently. She smiled brightly causing you to reflect it.

The both of you began kissing passionately, you slipped your tongue into larissas mouth in hopes to win for dominance but that's simply a game she was way to good at. She pulled you onto her lap and held the back of your head as she deepened the kiss making you moan before pulling away.

" there she is" she chuckled holding you tightly.

" here I am" your spok before she held you flush against her chest pulling you to lay down with her.

" hey what about your work?" You asked looking upbat her. She looked down and smiled at you.

" what about it, sweetheart? Now sleep" she muttered, slowly starting to drift off to sleep when her eyes began to get heavy. You smiled at her, slowly drifting off to dream land aswell. She simply loves you......

#fypシ゚viral #gwendoline christie #fanfic #larissa weems x female reader #love #cute #gwendolineuniverse #wednesday #larissa weems #marilynthornhilllover #marilynthornhilllover fanfics #fluff fanfics #fluff overload #larissa weems fanfic #larissaweems #larissa weems x reader #larissa x reader

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nerdy-frog98 · 15 days

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Okay I’ve had several days to think about it, and I’m not upset about Eddie’s cheating storyline anymore.

Nobody asked, but HERE’S why.

Eddie is an incredibly traumatized character. The military experiences (+ his dead friends), losing his wife so suddenly & without closure, and a couple near death experiences will do that to you! Add that to parents trying to take his child away ON TOP OF feeling like he needs to give Christopher a mother at any and all costs…? Maybe a little bit of Catholic guilt sprinkled in there too.

Season 5 was not my favorite for a myriad of reasons, but one thing I did like about it was Eddie’s complete mental breakdown. It felt like a long time coming... BUT. His mental breakdown didn’t even really scratch the surface of his issues, and there are still a lot of things he needs to face before he can truly be at peace. One of those things is Shannon.

The effect that Shannon’s loss had on Eddie has, in my opinion, never been explored properly. We got a little of it in season 3 with the illegal fighting, and then hints of it again when he was with Ana, but it never felt like closure to me. It felt like season 6 tried to give him closure (through Marisol), but it wasn’t satisfying because it was more or less a duller version of what happened with Ana. “Moving on” for his sake, but with no real emotional repercussions. Maybe this is just a personal opinion, but his story has felt like a ticking time bomb to me since the moment he broke up with Ana. His breakdown in s5 wasn’t the real bomb though.

Now imagine being Eddie, a guy with a lot of unresolved guilt and feelings for a woman who died right in front of him. Imagine you see a woman with that dead wife’s exact face. I can honestly say I have no fucking clue what I would do in his position. What he did- erasing Marisol in his first conversation with this lookalike Kim, then later lying to Buck to meet up with Kim- is morally not okay. Sure. Would any of us act in a rational way though?

I’m not meaning to justify cheating, but I do genuinely believe this is one of the only ways that stubborn ass was going to figure out his issues in a way that might actually help him move on. He’s being delusional with Kim, and once the ball drops, I believe there’s a great big breakdown waiting for him on the other end.

People often accuse Eddie of being the most boring of the 118, and I hate that assessment so goddamn much. Eddie is probably one of theee most complex characters (besides Buck) in the entire show. He’s self-destructive, kind, loyal, patient and impatient- he’s a good father and a good friend, and he’s FLAWED. That is why I love him so much.

My initial disappointment with him partially stems from me wanting him to have a singular season of PEACE, which…I realized wasn’t possible without blowing up the bomb first (would’ve preferred to disarm the bomb but I’ll take what I can get).

#i also think eddie is hella gay but that’s for another day #the hate on eddie has been annoying me because it DOES feel in character to me #not because i think eddie is a cheater #but because eddie is stupid (affectionate) and delusional when it comes to love #mans got a big storm coming #911 abc #911 #buddie #watch 911 with whitney #gay eddie diaz #eddie diaz #edmundo diaz #character study #shannon diaz

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rose-tea-and-strawberries · 1 year

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#JusticeForYuu

Warning: long rant coming up. Mentions of PTSD and Trauma.

So I recently read this manhwa called ‘Ashtarte’ and let me tell you, compared to other manhwas that I’ve read, I’ve never felt more vindicated or satisfied by the way it handles trauma and forgiveness.

Basically, the main character is a young princess, about ten or eleven or twelve I can’t remember, who has spent her entire life being treated like nothing by her entire family for no pretty much no reason at all. Trust me when I say that the neglect and emotional abuse she undergoes is awful and after a while, she realises that she doesn’t deserve to be treated that way. She mentally and emotionally emancipates herself from them and makes a family with her small handful of servants that live with her in her broken down house (let me tell you, they all love and protect her so much. Her mother figure/ best friend/ maid is the absolute GOAT), telling them that she won’t waste any tears on her bio family anymore. And when her bio family beg for forgiveness after she makes a very obvious effort to ignore and stay as far away from them as possible, she tells them that if they want her to even consider forgiving them for all the pain they put her through, they need to wait 10 years just like how she spent ten years all alone, trapped in that house, waiting for someone to love her. Even after the 5 year timeskip, she still doesn’t give them the time of day whilst they send her letters and mountains of gifts (that she never opens) and when she meets them again because of some obligatory family thing, she tells them point blank that there’s a chance that she’ll never forgive them and there’s nothing that she wants from them so just leave her alone and just walks out as they all suffer in their guilt.

And, let me tell you, as someone who has read a lot of female lead manhwas, I’ve never seen a FL not forgive a neglectful family - either they end up forgiven after an apology that lasts for like one chapter, or the MC gets her revenge and completely ruins them, or it’s an isekai story so now that a new person is possessing the main character, they finally decide to show interest and since the new character is either scared of them, is trying to gain their favour or has never undergone their horrible treatment of the host body, they just get off scot-free (A Match Made In Mana is a good example of this. Like the romance. Hate the fact that the older brother only started treating her right when another person isekaied into the main character - same thing with There Is No Place For Fakes)

Now what has this got to do with anime Disney boys you ask. Let me get to that.

Now I’m the kind of person that can hold a grudge - not that much in real life but very much so when it comes to fictional characters. If I was Jo March, I wouldn’t even be in the same room as Amy March after she burned the manuscript for at least a year. There are some characters that I just can’t stand because they never get the full consequences for what they put others through and I hate that so much (I’m not going to name names because a lot of them are fandom favourites and I don’t want to start a war).

What I’m trying to say is that why can’t there be a Yuu that doesn’t forgive the overblot gang/dorms for what they put them through? Because you have to admit that they way that they treated this homeless, magicless human with absolutely nothing to their name and that is, in every instance, at the bottom of the food chain was awful. And I’m not talking about the overblots - they were clearly in the midst of a mental breakdown and weren’t in the right state of mind. But how would you explain everything that they did pre-overblot? When they are fully conscious of everything they did. Riddle even admitted after his overblot that he knew that he was being harsh but he still did that stuff anyway.

I know that we have to forgive everyone for the sake of the plot since we need Riddle in Book 2, Leona in Book 3, Azul in Book 4 and so on and so forth but when I remember the torment that Yuu faces, I just want to tell them all to take a hike.

I know that these boys had horrible lives. I know that these are deeply traumatised individuals and that them overblotting was the only way for them to heal. But guess what? Going through trauma doesn’t excuse giving trauma to someone else? As Jake Peralta once said:

Confession Time - I was the anon that sent this: https://www.tumblr.com/shiny-jr/716948600309137408/hi-i-just-want-to-say-that-ive-read-all-of-your?source=share

And I still stand by what I said.

I just find it really annoying that when I search for angst fics it’s always the boys’ trauma or unrequited love or death or break ups - or maybe even something mentioning an overblot but I’ve never once found anything about the boys asking for forgiveness for what they did to Yuu prior to the overblots because once, just once, I want to read someone asking Yuu to forgive them and for Yuu to be selfish just once and say ‘no’

I know that I portray my fem!Yuu as this person that’s so sweet and forgiving and kind and soft and gentle but that’s because I’m obsessed with the dynamic of this sweet sunshine bubbly girl being a breath of fresh air to these villainous boys (and also because I kind of took some inspiration from my favourite princess, Snow White, and I based her a bit on Wendy Darling because I wanted her to be that ‘mature young girl’ who is very motherly but is still very much a fun-loving, imaginative child) but I just want a Yuu that is given the respect that they deserve.

I want a Yuu that actually experiences PTSD because of the treatment that they’ve undergone. I want them to hate the fact that their experience in NRC has changed them. I want them to hate that they’ve developed claustrophobia and a fear of the dark after they were forcefully imprisoned in Scarabia, I want them to hate how anything can trigger a PTSD-induced flashback, I want them to hate how Riddle’s jabs at their character and parentage still ring in their head after all this time, I want them to hate how whenever they’re submerged in water, all they can remember is what Azul, Jade and Floyd put them through in their attempts to get their home and family back. I want them to hate how often they get nightmares, how any second could be the day they finally get killed by any of these magic users who are far more powerful than them. I want them to look in the mirror and despise every single scar that litters their once unblemished body. I want them to hate how they had to ask the people who stripped them of their home and the only family they had in NRC for help in Book 4 because now they are indebted to them and they have no idea when Azul would want to cash that.

I’ve seen fics that have Yuu go through heatstroke during the marches in Scarabia and, as someone that not only has had heatstroke before but also had a really scary fainting experience I headcanon that as well so how about a Yuu that turns down Kalim’s invitations because the sight of Scarabia reminds them of the hostility that they faced when they were the most vulnerable. How about a Yuu that tries not to hate Kalim because he’s a genuinely nice person and was the only one to welcome them with kindness but can’t help but feel bitter whenever they hear the housewarden excuse Jamil’s behaviour when they still remember how they were locked up against their will.

This fic by linawritestwst and this fic by the-hearteater portray what I’m talking about really well. (taxonomize our differences by Jemimimi does a really good job of illustrating how being in Twised Wonderland affects Yuu’s mental health - there’s an incredible scene where Yuu has a panic attack and teaches Grim how to help them out of it. I nearly cried because their sense of self worth is so low and suicidal tendencies are so unstable that in multiple points of the story they try to get other students to kill them and Yuu my baby 😭)

When I go through the Rollo x reader fics, the majority of them are either yandere or the usual fluff. But Rollo can actually be a good friend for Yuu to have. Whilst their mentalities are different, they both agree that magic is dangerous - with Yuu being a victim of said magic. I honestly think that, if he wasn’t written as the big bad of the event, he could’ve been a really good ally that would understand Yuu’s pain of not only facing overblot after overblot but their helplessness of being surrounded by magical individuals and not knowing whether they’ll be able to survive another day.

Everyone’s always like #Crowley Slander (which he rightfully deserves, I am thisclose to punting him) but don’t forget everything the boys did. I see fics where they stand up to Crowley for Yuu but the most they do is reference the overblots but never that they did horrible things as well. Crowley may have told Yuu to stay behind during the winter holidays but Jamil was the one who imprisoned us and prevented us from contacting our friends for help. Crowley may have made Yuu stay at Ramshackle (although to be fair Ramshackle is kind of the safest option - who knows what would happen to Yuu if their magical self was in an actual dorm, especially all of the female Yuus. I think living in isolation is kind of the best option for them when the universe is out to get them. Plus, the ghosts are amazing company.) but Azul was the one who made us homeless and had a shady business (that he still has even after the overblot). Crowley may have been blackmailing Yuu with food, shelter and money but Leona was the one that was sabotaging the students and Vil was the one that tried to point blank kill an innocent child in cold blood after making his childhood trauma and personal one-sided rivalry everyone’s problem for the weeks leading up to the VDC.

Everyone only treated them with respect after the overblot incidents - so they literally had to put themselves in danger and nearly die for them to be treated as not a nobody. When Riddle made those completely uncalled for jabs at Yuu, an innocent bystander, nobody said or did anything. Not Trey, who enabled Riddle’s reign of terror and quietly observed the suffering all of the Heartslabyul students (and then had the gall to tell adeuceyuu not to get angry at Riddle because of course tragic backstory = forgiveness), not Cater, who canonically has a hidden side so Yuu has more of a reason not to trust him, not any of the other card soldiers - no Ace, the one everyone writes off as a stupid tactless jerk that does badly in school and only causes trouble, was the only one that had the emotional intelligence to realise that Yuu’s feelings were hurt and was the only one who cared to do something about it via sucker punching the tantrum-throwing tyrant.

(I can’t remember if Deuce did anything but he already stood up for us during the egg debacle so it’s okay he’s still my number one love)

(Also: Riddle is known to be incredibly strict with his dorm. It’s been said that Heartslabyul has the best academic record because of Riddle’s incredibly high standards. He also doesn’t take excuses from anyone even if they aren’t even in the wrong - which is seen when he exiles adeuceyuu from the dorm during the Mont Blanc Tart Incident where Trey tells Riddle that he was the one who told them to make the tart for the party and Riddle says that it was still their fault for not knowing the rules beforehand because of course a first year would have memorised all 810 rules by their like third day and it would be perfectly normal of them to ask a senior for advice on what to do. My question is: how many dyslexic students or anyone else with learning disabilities do you think Riddle has sent crying? How many students with less than stellar family backgrounds joined NRC only to find that they were sorted into a dorm that had a leader who not only holds their abusive mother’s teaching methods on a pedestal but is more than ready to hurl insults at anyone that disagrees with him? How many times had Trey seen an innocent student receive unfair treatment and kept quiet about it despite it being his job as a vice dorm leader and upperclassman to look after them?)

I know that so many people want Yuu to overblot or go through their villain arc so that the boys can be put in that place but why do we even have to go that far? If Yuu did have magic they would have overblotted ages ago but even so why do they need to have a mental breakdown so that others could see where they went wrong? Remember an overblot can kill its host and Yuu doesn’t need another near death experience.

I want Yuu to be like Ashtarte and just have a small circle of friends and family in Ace, Deuce, Grim and the Ramshackle ghosts and tell everyone else to bog off. I want Ace, Deuce and Grim to be like the maid, Leona/Loena - different translations have different spellings (she is such a protective mama bear I love her so much. She literally calls out royalty to their faces, is ready to throw hands with the entire world and is willing to risk her own life for Ashtarte’s happiness) and act as Yuu’s guard dogs to prevent anyone from coming near them. Ace, Deuce and Grim have been there since the beginning, they’re Yuu’s ride or die besties that know what they’re going through, they’re platonic soulmates who can clearly see the emotional turmoil on weighing down on them. I want them to witness how Yuu is affected by their PTSD with their panic attacks and nightmares and bouts of depression and dissociation and then doing their best to learn how to help them. I want Yuu to refuse to step foot in another dorm and just go to NRC for classes and then disappear into Ramshackle. I want Ace and Deuce to run interference in case anyone approaches their friend because can’t you see that they don’t want to talk to you, who’s not afraid to stand up to anyone be it teachers or upperclassmen because haven’t they done enough damage.

Yes, Ace is a jerk but he’s not a mean bully of a jerk. He’s just a stupid tactless teenage boy who just needs to be humbled once or twice - he’s completely harmless unlike Sebek and his humanphobic bigoted butt who should definitely keep his comments to himself because Yuu already has enough troubles without someone reminding them of how inferior their species is.

I want these boys to feel guilt - not because of their overblots but because they were actually horrible people before they tried to kill a defenseless, magicless human. I want Yuu to not only lose trust in the main characters but also with everyone else because they never know who would hurt or betray them next - who would be like Trey or Rook and enable bad behaviour, or who would be like Azul and take advantage of their weaknesses, or who would be like Jamil and pretend to be their friend and then stab them in the back. I want a Yuu that’s tired of being manipulated and used by everyone and is just done with everything.

As much as I love parental!Staff, you have to admit that canonically, they’ve done a pretty bad job of looking after Yuu so how about a Yuu that doesn’t trust adults because they’ve shown no interest in actually being someone that Yuu can open up to. Also, Azul was able to get away with everything he did was because he had Crowley in his pocket - who’s to say that he doesn’t have other adults under his thumb as well? (We know he doesn’t but how can Yuu be sure)

I want Yuu to be friends with Neige because he seems like such a sweetheart and I really don’t like how I see fics putting him down just to make Vil look good. As I mentioned above, Snow White is my favourite Disney Princess and sharing a spot with Pooh Bear as my favourite Disney character so a darling boy that is inspired by her would be an awesome friend to have - and he has never caused Yuu physical, verbal, emotional or mental harm.

Don’t get me wrong. I know that this is making me come off as a hater but I just want some justice for Yuu. They deserve absolutely nothing that they go through and I want happiness for them.

Also, on a completely unrelated note, I may have been listening to Numb Little Bug a tad bit too much.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst yuu #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader

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trash-and-trash-accessories · 2 months

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Fox Mulder doesn't have the "I Want To Believe" poster there because he's crazy. He doesn't have it there to broadcast his beliefs or as a mantra or to remind him to always look for aliens.

Fox Mulder keeps that "I Want To Believe" sign above his desk to remind him of his own internal biases.

That sign hangs above Mulder's desk to remind him of his own shortcomings and flaws. He's aware that he's a hack with dangerous beliefs and prone to flights of fancy and maybe even delusions. He's aware that he's desperately searching for aliens and monsters where there are only men doing bad things. And he has to remind himself of that, constantly.

That's why he's thrilled when he meets Scully and she challenges his beliefs, says that logically aliens don't exist. He's thrilled when she tells him to cut the crap in the pilot episode. He needs someone to challenge him. He needs someone who won't take his shit and put up with his flights of fancy. And he knows it. He's been dealing with himself for years and he feels relief and joy when Scully comes in and says enough of your bullshit. We're doing this my way. With science and logic. He isn't smiling and teasing her because he thinks he's smarter and better than her. He's smiling because she's exactly the person he needs in his life.

That's why he tells her right away that he's a UFO freak with trauma about his sister and a true believer. Not because he's trying to convince her to believe, but because he needs her to understand where he's coming from and what's wrong with him. So she can understand that either he's a dangerous lunatic himself, or he's delving into a dangerous conspiracy and either way she could be collateral damage if she stays with him. He spends the pilot episode reckoning with the idea that either he's a maniac or he's pulling this young fresh detective into danger. When she starts agreeing with him he gets upset, talks her out of it.

Mulder keeps that sign above his desk to remind himself to look into the "reasonable logical" explanations. He keeps that sign on his desk because he knows he's flawed and biased and frankly, dangerous.

He tells Scully exactly what he thinks is happening and about all the crazy stuff he believes not because he's trying to convince her to believe too, but so she can be his sounding board. So she can throw his illogical bullshit back in his face and remind him to look past his own biases and paranoia and quasi-religious zealotry. Because he knows he needs that. He knows he's in a conspiracy brained echo chamber of his own making and having a slow-burn mental breakdown. And he sees Scully as salvation from himself. As another figure in his quasi-religious belief system. The savior.

As the series develops he relies on her more and more to reality check him. Literally reality check him and manage what he worries might all be a delusion.

Mulder pretends he's confident and all the constant criticism and sidelong glances don't get to him and that might be true because he doesn't respect those people but he respects Scully. And he needs someone he respects to tell him when he's wrong, when he's being biased or actively delusional. Scully is his salvation. She's compassionate about his trauma and the reasoning behind his beliefs, but confident and logical enough to tell him when it's all bullshit. She's his savior, his rock, and often his only real connection to material reality.

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prisi · 5 months

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I feel TOH fails a lot with the treatment that Belos and his lore receive towards the end. I think his arc will feel so much more complete if the show was allowed to show us that he suffered in the past and wasn't like "nah he is just pure evil and he has always been like that". I don't like how the show wants you to believe that Caleb did nothing wrong or reprehensible when there's obvious implications that he abandoned Philip to go with Evelyn, it will be so much more interesting that the show recognized that Caleb was naive and selfish in abandoning his brother (who only have him as family and support figure) to his own in the puritan era, and how that action of Caleb deeply damaged Philip emotionally and mentally (kinda like Luz abandoning Camila to live her fantasy in the Boiling Isles without thinking in the consequences but we are not talking about that right now, I love Luz btw don't get mad at me). And Philip, who probably entered the Isles with the sole intention to "save" his brother who at his eyes was bewitched and seduced by an evil witch to go with her, when he finally found his brother after many years and found out that Caleb actually loved Evelyn and DECIDED to leave him behind he totally lost his mind.

A confrontation escene between Philip and Caleb (it could be a flashback or something showed in Hollow Mind even) will be so interesting to watch, something like in the third season of Infinity Train when Simon confronts The Cat for abandoning him as a child, Caleb will try to justify himself at first saying that he is sorry, that he thought Philip was going to be okay on his own, that he didn't thought that he was going to miss him or something, making Philip more angry, sad and confused.

The situation will scale to the point that Philip, (who's original goal was to kill Evelyn to bring back Caleb in the Human Realm) now that he is angry, sad and out of his senses he tries to attack Caleb with the dagger he had in his hand which triggers the knife fight in which Caleb dies.

Philip, after realizing that he killed the only person he had in the world, he tries to justify himself in an internal monologue like: "oh well, I murdered you, but in doing so I freed your soul from the union with that sinful witch. That's what the witch hunting taught me, right? That's what YOU taught me, RIGHT?". Trying to shift the blame for what just happened onto Caleb but also letting us know and acknowledging that it was Caleb who introduced and instructed Philip in the witch hunt and did nothing to reverse it.

Coming to the end, when the fight ends and Belos and Luz are face to face, the scene would play out more or less as we see it in canon but at the moment in which the first drop of boiling rain falls on his hand and begins to see his body dissolve, he enters a mental breakdown in which he realizes that he wasted his entire life on a goal that made no sense, the witches weren't evil or a threat and he knew it, but he clung to his goal because he did not want to face the reality, he did not want to accept that he had killed his brother in vain nor did he want to accept that he had decided to abandon him, and he did not want to die knowing that he wasted 400 years suffering for something that was not worth it. At the end of his collapse he would crawl a little and see Hunter in the distance (because yes, Hunter should have been present in the end even a little), he would try to extend his hand in his direction but Hunter, noticing this, would close his eyes, look away and take a step back behind Eda and Raine. Philip experienced his brother's abandonment again but with the difference that this time it is merely his fault, because even if Caleb damaged Philip deeply with his abandonment, he is not responsable of the path Philip choosed to take.

Seeing and realizing all of this Belos would stop crawling and give up, lying on the ground, breathing hard as the boiling rain finally dissolves him and dies.

Or at least that is how I liked it to happen, let me know what you think.

#toh critical #toh criticism #belos toh #luz toh #philip wittebane #toh salt #toh #the owl house #hunter toh #hunter noceda #emperor belos #hunter wittebane #luz noceda #hot takes

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