#i feel like i only really have two friends and they don't need me as much as i need them

[unluckilyimnot]

hihi! I was wondering if you could one with an s/o a bit more colder but softer with them specifically. Maybe sae, yoichi, rin, and hiori. Thanks!!!1 :33

(pls take your time with this)

cold to other but softer with them s/o - sae, yoichi, rin, hiori

m.list | rules | requests open

Note: hiiii thank you for your request! It's so cute I love this vibe and honestly same I'm only nice to me gf 🧍‍♀️ I hope it's fine !

Sae

You're a killer duo honestly

You're impossible to approach when it's the two of you, your expression is closed

it doesn't even seems like you're together or close

You keep your relationship private mostly in the beginning but it's a little too much sometimes

People noticed that you two are together based on the small gesture : him taking your hand when it's crowded, you pulling him closer when he doesn't look where he walks

But people are choked when they pass from seeing without and with sae around

The way your face light up when you see him around is something, you go from a darker look to sparkling eyes in a second

You ask about his day, maybe lay a little on him if he's sitting next to you

Then go back to your usual neutral/cold face

Those who don't really know are shocked at first

Yoichi

People don't imagined his s/o to he like that AT ALL

Isagi is really sweet and caring yet the first time they meet you you were frowning at them

They soon realized you're just like this, neutral expression that makes you look rude, and you're not the most gentle with his friends either

But you don't feel like you need to? You don't own them a thing

Isagi is always a bit sorry when you ignore people but always answer to him with a sweet voice

You lay your head on his shoulder, only paying attention for real when he's talking

He feels loves for sure but he tries to ease this side of you around people he really appreciate

Rin

He kinda likes it

He feels seen and really appreciate for some reasons

There's a small grin or blush on his face when he realized that your tone soften for him during a conversation

He does it for you as well, it's an habits for you two

It's your world and people live in it kind of vibe

There's nothing weird with you two being together, it's like heaven send you to him and vice versa

You two are : unapproachable

Hiori

Once again, a little surprising but not as shocking as yoichi when you know him a little

Hiori is harsher than people think but he also need someone prioritizing him because of his relationship with his parents

No need to say that he feels like he's the most precious human in the world with you

He can't help but giggle when he sens your tone changed when you talk to people interrupting you

You're not a smiley person yet he always get to see your face lighting up when you catch his sight

The way you lay on against his chest in the street when you have to wait or even hold his fingers when you're looking at your phone instead of the road

He loves every little things that you do and when there's somebody with you, they're always surprised to see you this comfortable around someone

I hope you liked it !

Reblog are appreciated ♡

#blue lock x reader #blue lock imagines #blue lock headcanons #blue lock hc #blue lock #bllk x reader #bllk imagines #bllk headcanons #bllk hcs #sae x reader #sae headcanons #sae fluff #isagi x reader #isagi headcanons #isagi fluff #rin x reader #rin imagines #rin fluff #rin itoshi x reader #hiori x reader #hiori yo x reader #hiori headcanons #hiori fluff

[cobaltperun]

Tara Carpenter x Female Reader

R and Tara play together as children. R expresses her love for Tara, and her desire to marry her in the future!

Make us something special, like you always do!💙

Marry Me?

Tara Carpenter x Female Reader (Request)

Masterlist

Word count: 1.1k

The first time you were worried about Tara was when you were really young, when she tried to fit in and run with other kids despite her asthma. She ran out of breath quickly enough, but still pushed on, needing to feel accepted and in the end the teacher needed to help her through an asthma attack. That was when you were seven, and ever since then you refused to play games that required Tara to run or where she could get exhausted.

Which was why you were looking for her all over the playground. She hid well, she always did, and being tiny only helped her, but you loved the challenge. You went to look beneath the slide, because that was the last place you didn't look at.

And then, just as you crouched down to check, Tara jumped out, startling you and making you fall back onto your butt.

Her laughter filled the empty playground, and as infectious as it was you couldn't help but laugh with her.

"Found you, I guess," you laughed as she dropped down to the grass next to you.

"You didn't, I scared you," she denied your victory.

"Wha- Tara those aren't the rules!" you exclaimed, unknowingly taking her bait.

"Sore loser!" she stuck her tongue out at you.

"Cheater," you grumbled with a pout and looked away.

You heard Tara lying down, but still maintained your "angry pout" you didn't like it when someone scared you, Tara included.

"Let's go to the swing?" Tara suggested and you felt her leaning on your back and hanging her arms around you. "Hmm? Grumpy?"

As if you could ever say no to her. "Say 'please'," you still had to get at least that out of her.

"Please," she said it so easily, but you knew she meant it, she absolutely meant it, so you got up and the two of you ran over to the swings.

"What do you wanna do when you grow up?" Tara suddenly asked you as you started swinging. The Sun would set soon, so you didn't have much time together left today, but the sky was so beautiful right now, and the last bits of sunlight shining over the trees in the park made the moment feel almost magical.

"I wanna be a doctor!" you said immediately with the certainty only someone of your age could have. At nine years old you definitely didn't know anything about what it would take to do that, you just knew you liked the idea. "You?"

Tara thought it over. "I dunno, I'll think of something later," she shrugged. "Why a doctor?"

You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. "None of your business," you refused to tell her.

Tara whipped her head toward you abruptly. "Y/N!" she pouted and you had to look away from her, because she was using her big puppy eyes on you. "Come on, please tell me?"

"No," you felt your resolve breaking, even as you refused to tell her.

But Tara was nothing, if not stubborn. "You're mean if you don't tell me," she said.

"I am mean then," you still tried to outdo her in stubbornness.

"I won't hang out with you for a week," she threatened, all serious and you sighed, giving in to her.

"I wanna cure your asthma," you whispered, too embarrassed to look at her as she got off the swing and stopped your own.

"For me?" she asked as you jumped off as well and you could only nod. She reached up, ruffling the hair at the top of your head. "Thanks, Y/N," she didn't tell you you had to be a doctor, she didn't tell you you had to cure her, she just thanked her. "You sure we'll still be friends when we grow up?" there was something in her eyes, a sadness you saw only every now and then. Her dad left recently so you understood it had something to do with him.

"Yeah, I... I kinda wanna marry you, Tara, I really like you," you had no idea why you blurted it out all of a sudden, if it was to make her understand just how much you liked her, or if there was another reason, but you said it, and you meant it wholeheartedly.

Tara laughed at that and took your hand, it was time to leave the playground and go home.

~X~

Fifteen years and a lot of things happening later, Tara sat by your side in the bedroom the two of you shared. There were tons of your books and her movies on the shelves and she loved how personal the two of you made the room look. Chemistry, medicine and horror, an amazing combination if anyone asked her. She leaned against your shoulder as the two of you watched a movie. In the end, you didn't turn out to be a doctor, it just wasn't for you, but you did get into medical chemistry, so, as far as Tara was concerned it was close enough given it was a decision you made while you were still naive kids.

She watched you from the side, much like she did while you were children, and though both of you grew up she could still remember all the times you played without anyone else around.

"Say, Y/N," she began, happy that she could spend the night with you, her girlfriend of almost five years.

"Yeah?" you asked, looking away from the movie to look at her.

"I've been thinking of that time we were kids, on the playground," she began, smiling teasingly at you.

"Real specific T," you chuckled.

"You know, when you told me you wanted to be a doctor," she said to freshen up your memory.

You choked on your breath. "Ah, that time," you chuckled, clearly embarrassed as you rubbed the back of your head and looked away from her.

Tara's smile widened and she reached up to ruffle your hair. "It's okay, it's just me," she assured you and leaned in to softly kiss your lips.

"I know," you muttered against her lips, your hand moving to cup her cheek.

"Marry me?" she asked and you didn't choke this time.

"Of course," you just told her, and she couldn't be any happier. You kept your word to her, you stayed by her side, no matter how crazy her life got, she could count on you. And no matter how crazy things got in the future, she knew she'd still be able to count on you to have her back.

A/N: Special enough? 🤣🤣

#tara carpenter x female reader #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter #jenna ortega x reader #scream #x reader #x female reader

[billwidoll]

Why? What?

Summary: Rafe was always in love with you, but he didn't want to show his feelings, but then Topper ended up taking what was his.

Warnings: Cheating, Unprotected sex, explicit speech

Author's Notes: Horned Topper 🐂

The first time Rafe saw you, you were on the beach playing with small turtles. He thought the first impression was useless, but then he analyzed it and realized that you were an angel of a person, You smiled sweetly, played like a cute child and had wonderful skin.

And Rafe managed to get closer to you, he managed to become friends with you. And little did you know Rafe's intentions. But Rafe was afraid to express his true feelings, so he needed more time to understand that feeling called Love.

But Rafe unfortunately went too slowly, Topper, your best friend, ended up taking what was "his" when you started dating, which made Rafe surprised. He knew Topper hit on But I didn't know that you get all his pick-up lines.

But now they were there, You Topper and Rafe were at a table, talking about various legal topics, but Topper only knew how to whisper inappropriate things in your ear. And it was killing Rafe

"Can you two stop?" Rafe talks about being stressed and he was very jealous

"What's up man? She's my girlfriend" Topper says, running his disgusting hands over your body and it makes you uncomfortable

And Rafe noticed this and immediately questioned him

"And she's your girlfriend, not your whore!" Rafe speaks taking the tone of his voice with Topper and that makes you a little Concerned

"Are you crazy, Rafe? I'll do whatever I want in my relationship" Topper says, finally letting you go and raising his voice to Rafe too

"I think you better keep to your Thompson!" Rafe speaks, getting up on the table and already prepared for a fight with Topper.

You enter in front of the two, after you already knew what would happen

“Y/N get out of my sight!” Topper shouts at you

"Don't tell her what she should or shouldn't do!" Rafe counters by heading towards

"YOU TWO ARE HERE! Topper, I'm fine, okay?" You say holding your boyfriend's hand

"what will you do?" Topper asks already shut up

"I'm leaving! And you're going home" you say, taking your coat

"Okay, I'll get the car keys" Topper says looking for the keys

"no Topper! I'm not going with you! This dinner just showed how disgusting you are and Chernoboy" you say leaving him confused and Rafe surprised

"Rafe...mind if I go home to wash?" You ask "innocently" and you see Rafe's huge smile growing on his face

"and Of Course Babyboo" Rafe says he's proud of making Topper mad and happy to finally have the opportunity to try something with you

"That's good... Topper, I'll call you later, okay?' you say leaving the restaurant with

You and Rafe walk towards Rafe's car and get in. You were left in an awkward silence on the way home and Rafe knew he needed to express his love for you. Even though it was hard for Topper

“What music do you like Y/n?” Rafe asks trying to start a conversation

"well...I like the Beatles, I know they're a pretty old band...but I love them." y/n speaks answering Rafe's question

"Beatles? They're really amazing, want me to put some of their songs on the radio?" Rafe asks, already starting a cool topic to talk about.

"Yes, Could you put "Yesterday?" You say smiling to Rafe and it didn't take long for Rafe to put on the music

"why?" Rafe asks making you hiss in confusion.

"what?" You ask Rafe innocently.

"Why Topper? Why did you have to fall in love with him right away?" Rafe asks, stopping the car in the middle of a dark, foggy road.

"I'm not literally in love with Topper...I like him" you say a little uncomfortable because Rafe stopped on the road

"So why are you with him? You should be with someone who values ​​you" Rafe says and you finally look at him

"Sorry Rafe...but I'm really good at taking care of myself, okay? And why are you so interested in this?" You talk a little ruder to Rafe.

"Okay! Go! Look like you don't value yourself in any way!" Rafe screams and slams his hands on the car's rolling stock.

"Screw you Cameron!" You shout and open the car door to leave in the middle of nowhere

“y/n stop!” Rafe says getting out of the car too and following you "Where the fuck are you going?" Rafe says, following you down the deserted and foggy street

"to a place where asshole boys leave me alone!" You say finally stopping and looking at him.

"You want to know something? I love you! I love you when you smile, I love you when you get embarrassed about something, I love your way of liking old and outdated magic..."

Rafe simply explodes, he was tired of guarding that strong feeling he felt for you. He just wanted to know the scent of your breath and the soft touches of your lips

"why?" You ask with a shaky voice.

"what?" Rafe speaks confused once again

"Why don't you just kiss me, you fucking idiot?" You say approaching Rafe and grabbing his neck and finally kissing him

The kiss had desire, love, passion, betrayal, lack, affection, this kiss brought good and bad emotions

You stop to breathe and look at each other carefully, look at each other to the depths of your souls

"What do you think about having sex in your car?" Rafe says smiling and it makes you laugh

"I think it's a great idea, but what about Topper?" You talk to Rafe

"Break up with him, because now you're going to be mine....y/n Cameron"

#dark rafe cameron #drew starkey #drew starkey smut #outerbanks rafe #rafe cameron #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron drabble #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron headcanons #rafe cameron oneshot #rafe outer banks #rafe cameron outer banks #rafe smut #rafecore #rafe imagine #rafe obx #obx rafe cameron #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron moodboard #rafe cameron obx #rafe cameron prompt #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron thoughts #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe fanfiction #rafe fic #rafe x reader #rafe x you

[tokidokitokyo]

Cool Kanji Party Tricks

Or “How I Use Kanji to Impress My Friends”

Learning kanji can be daunting, especially for those just starting out in their Japanese studies. There are two thousand standard kanji needed to read a newspaper, but Japanese people know and use many thousands more. There are several methods available to self study kanji (just do a quick Google search to find the most popular), but any serious study of kanji takes time. Lots of time. It can feel like studying kanji over and over is a waste of time, especially since you have the internet at your fingertips to look things up at any time. However, I really believe that having a good foundation in kanji is essential to mastering Japanese, and I wanted to share what I call "cool party tricks" to encourage you in your kanji studies.

What are "cool kanji party tricks"? This is just a list of things I have noticed that having a solid understanding of kanji will allow you to do. I have been studying Japanese for more than 10 years, and most of these things I just noticed one day in an a-ha moment, and even though someone had told me for years that learning and practicing kanji is important, it took several realizations for me to truly grasp what that meant. I would say that many of these require an intermediate grasp of the language to be able to use consistently, but I think that you can start doing any of these after achieving a basic foundation in the Japanese language.

So when your hand is cramped from writing the same kanji for hours, when on'yomi and kun'yomi have become swear words, and when you lost that one little point on the exam because the kanji you were supposed to use was only off by one stroke from the kanji you actually used... I hope you will remember this post and feel a little bit encouraged.

Find the appropriate kanji to use when typing in the romaji/hiragana on a computer/phone

Since I started my Japanese studies during high school, the formal classes I was taking had me writing out kanji for homework in order to remember it and to be able to pass the quizzes and exams. So I spent many hours writing out kanji only to end up with hand cramps and ugly looking written characters. It took ages and the stream of kanji that I had to learn seemed endless. However, one benefit I quickly saw was that I was able to quickly adapt to typing in Japanese on a computer/phone because I was able to correctly identify the kanji that I had practiced, and knew which one to select when several choices came up.

In Japanese, many words have the same sounds but different kanji and meanings (these are called homophones). So when you type in the hiragana or romaji for a word into the keyboard, it will prompt you with a list of kanji to choose from. Being able to correctly select the right one is something I suddenly realized I could do one day, even if I hadn't used the word often. I knew and could recall a larger number of kanji than I thought, and I could eliminate any incorrect kanji for the word I was trying to use. Having a good solid foundation in kanji characters means that you don't have to go look up every word in the dictionary to check that you have the right kanji, and you also don't have to leave the word in kana because you can't guess the right kanji, but rather you are confident enough to pick the correct kanji for the word on your own. This makes typing more efficient and saves time!

Understand the meaning of a word just by looking at the kanji

When you know a significant amount of kanji and what they mean, sometimes when you encounter new compound words you can guess at what they mean. Or if you are like me and sometimes forget how to read words you are already supposed to know, you can magically relearn them by looking at the kanji and interpreting the meaning. So sometimes when I am reading text in Japanese and I see a compound I don't know, I can interpret the meaning from context and from my understanding of the individual kanji, and continue through the text without stopping to look up the word. This helps you to get the gist of a text without having to look up all the words, and is how you can start reading more advanced books or manga.

Guess at the pronunciation of a word from the kanji

On the flip side of the previous cool party trick is being able to guess how to pronounce a word by knowing the on'yomi and kun'yomi of the kanji, and therefore being able to guess at the pronunciation of a word. Unless the word has 人 or 生 in it. This helps most when reading out loud in class or to another person. It will also help you to feel smug about yourself while reading a book that is of a more advanced level and being able to determine the reading of several compound words in a row.

Understanding a new word using kanji clues

As an extension of the previous cool party tricks, I eventually reached the point where I could hear a word in conversation that I had never heard before, and figure out the meaning using kanji clues.

For example, not all Japanese people know English (shocking, right?), and busting out your phone to look up every single word you don't know can become burdensome in continuing the flow of a conversation. So, if I hear a word that I don't know during a conversation (and the continuation or flow of the conversation hinges on my understanding of the word), I will stop the person and either ask what kanji the word is written with, or if I have a guess I will ask "is this using the kanji for X?" This way I can gain clues to the key word without stopping the flow of conversation too much. (It's also a fun way to show off to Japanese speakers.)

For example, if you hear the word jishin (じしん) in conversation, and you aren't sure which meaning the speaker intended:

自信 self-confidence

自身 one's self

You can ask:

"Did you mean 自信 (jishin) with the "shin" from 信用 (shin'you) or did you mean 自身 (jishin) with the "mi" (another pronunciation of 身) as in one's body?"

Then the person can respond:

"Oh, I mean 身 (mi)! As in, 自分自身 (jibun jishin), or one's self."

Then, you can continue the conversation, having an understanding of what the speaker is saying and not having to take out your phone to translate as often. This also can give the person you are speaking to a better sense of your level and help them to tailor the conversation to you.

[I hope this conveys what I am trying to illustrate ^.^]

TL;DR: Kanji is Fun

Honestly, when kanji clicks and you can read words or understand their meanings, it's like deciphering a secret code, and this is one of the things I find so cool about Japanese, and why I have studied it for so long. So if you are just starting out and are daunted by kanji - don't worry. I am still daunted by kanji, but I also find it a useful tool to improve my knowledge of Japanese and to communicate in a way many people cannot. I hope this information was useful and inspires you to suffer through learn more kanji.

#日本語 #japanese #japanese language #japanese langblr #japanese studyblr #langblr #studyblr #learning japanese #learning kanji #cool kanji party tricks #kanji is fun #tokidokitokyo

[respectthepetty]

Pride Petty Watch - LiTA (Rain/Payu) 2

Because I'm petty, I had the crowd pick which blacklisted shows I would watch for the month of Pride. The first is Love in The Air, and even though I was mad in the first few episodes that Sky brushed off his friend running away from Payu at the beginning, Sky has proven he is a great friend, and I am very excited to get to his portion. Sorry, Rain. This Daddy x Baby dynamic needs to speed it up!

Let's wrap this stormy weather up!

If I was the receptionist, I'd love this job for the chisme. If I was a mechanic, I'd be pissed!

So all of this was a another test. Rain is proving himself to Payu as being worthy of his time and affection by ignoring Payu being mean to him, so even though there is definitely something happening with the yellow and blue between them, I'm ignoring it because Payu is HIGH-KEY pissing me all the way off, and I'm too focused on this room situation. Does this man have his garage room and actual house room?! What is this?!

LET ME IGNORE THEM, BABY JESUS!

Black x White. Blinding Light of Love. And just like that, I'm on my fellow Slut for Christ's side because WHY IS RAIN JUST STANDING OUT IN THE RAIN LIKE A DUMMY?! Miracles happen when we least expect them.

I am not feeling this bathing scene because there is not enough water in that huge ass tub, and out of all the things Payu should apologize for, he is saying sorry that Rain stood out in the rain. Can they just have sex already, so I can quit being petty?

God damn it! There is pink = 💕love💕 but I am very familiar with this scene because it was all over my dash when it aired, and I'm a bag of mixed emotions. Payu hid that condom under a toy truck, but opened it with his teeth, yet he kissed Rain's leg, so like . . . shit, Payu looks fine with his hair down.

The beginning of episode five is just horny on main from Rain telling his MOTHER that he was working on something else that was hard all night, and now we're just watching Payu work out before he peaces out in Payu's blue shirt only to end up in this! I refuse to acknowledge the colors because how did Payu find this boy AND WHY ARE THEY SCREWING AROUND IN HIS MAMA'S HOUSE?!

😬😬😬

Payu already claimed Rain to his face, followed him to his mama's house, and has gotten ultra possessive, yet Rain is freaking out thinking Payu is trying to ditch him. Rain is too smart to be this dumb.

A WHOLE ASS GIRL IS IN THIS SHOW! And Rain is just insulting her and her brothers after pining after her - "fruits" - really, Cloud Jizz?

The way I'm mad at these colors is the same way I'm mad at Rain for being upset that other people like his boyfriend. These two were made for each other.

STOP IT!

Number one rule of illegal race club is we don't talk about illegal race club.

I'm ignoring the wife talk the same way I'm ignoring the colors and the singing. I am God's strongest solider.

This legit should be the end of their arc and the fact that it is not just so Rain can get kidnapped is irritating me (yes, I know he gets kidnapped because my dash said so when it was airing).

Oh, look, a sweet flashback telling me they were meant for each other right before RAIN GETS KIDNAPPED!

These colors are on my fucking neck!

*eyes popping out of my head because the colors won't let me be* Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's gonna rip that suit off of you later and fuck you on the stairs of death then ride you. Yeah, we've all heard about it, now can we get to the kidnapping plot?

The colors are coloring on these two kinksters with Payu's "I like the sound, but not to ride" line like we don't all know what that means. So glad they found each other, but WHERE IS THE KIDNAPPING?! Does it not happen in this episode?! I thought there were only six episodes in each arc. Am I watching seven of just Rain ask the same damn questions of if they like each other?! Sonsito!

The colors are coloring so hard with Rain in his white tank and pink boxers (that he wore the first time they had sex) drinking white milk and Payu in his black shirt with his black tea cup and blue jacket hanging out on the chair. I HATE IT!

THE KIDNAPPING! The title card was "Sky After Rain" so let's move this along and give me my boy already! But also, if Rain was a rich bitch, this would've never happened! A delivery man asking for help? Um . . . better go find a buddy because rich bitches don't do manual labor. Finally, I appreciate that Payu's wild ass behavior of demanding Rain answer his calls paid off by him knowing something was up when Rain didn't answer. Now can we murder this bastard already for taking this awful picture?!

A comedian said that people only kneel for two reasons: God and dick, so this man is a dick who is about to meet God because he just said that he would have his men sexually assault Rain?! DRACARYS!

I have never been more excited to see the Bed Friend baddie! Not only because he is about to end this man's life, but also because he interrupted these two love birds making googly eyes at each other in the middle of a crime scene! And now Rain just said Payu was the only one who could screw him. WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS?!

Rain is clearly a words-over-actions guy, but at this point it is OBVIOUS that Payu loves him, so I would tell him I don't love him just to be mean.

And now Rain is telling Payu he would harm him if he cheats. WITH WHOM?! The damn mechanic who has to keep running interference between you two AT HIS JOB?! Y'all are such a mess and fully belong together.

Oh thank goodness, it's my sweet summer child Sky finally!

And his red devil because Prapai has to be the red to his bestie's blue, no?

See, Rain is triflin' because Sky did not snitch on him dating Payu, yet Rain gave up his number quick. This is why I ignored their colors because Rain knows this is wrong, but at least it FINALLY gets me more Sky on my screen. The End!

HE FUCKED UP HIS CAR ON PURPOSE?! WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK, PAYU?! YOU HAD THIS BOY INDEBTED TO YOU FOR WHAT?! BECAUSE HE WAS PRETTY AND YOU WANTED HIM?! WHAT WERE THE REASONS, PAYU?! WHAT?! WERE?! THE?! REASONS?!

*takes off my glasses* These after scenes got me all the way fucked up, and even though I was fine with how they ended in the car this episode, now I'm mad as hell that Payu just offered up this fun little tidbit that he jacked up Rain's car so he could see him again at the very end.

🤡

Pushes play on episode eight

#love in the air #Pride Petty Watch #I only love Sky but I already knew that #Payu is unhinged #and Rain likes it #so like . . . good for them #but this is wild bananas having that man admit he tampered with his car #what if he had an accident?! #then the girl?! #she was there the entire time! #AND NONE OF Y'ALL SAID ANYTHING ABOUT HER! #this is a wild ride #I thought this was the safe choice #but obviously I clowned myself

[padfootagain]

Only an Almost (XVI)

Chapter 16: Fare Well

Hi! Here comes a new chapter!

Okay, time to talk…

Sorry for the angst in advance…

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2496

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

This was a terrible idea.

Andrew hesitated one last time before knocking on your door.

This was a terrible idea. He was going to get his heart broken all over again. What was there to discuss anyway? You had met someone else, someone better than him… end of story.

He buried his hands in the pockets of his jacket while he waited for you to open the door. It was springtime, and yet the evening was particularly cold tonight. A clear sky above his head though, all inky and full of stars.

God, he shouldn’t have come…

Finally, the key turned in the lock, and the next second your door was opening. You welcomed him with a timid but earnest smile.

“Hi! Come in… do you want some tea?”

You didn’t wait for his answer, hurried to close the door behind him as if you were worried he would run away. He barely let out a ‘good evening’ that you were off to the kitchen, busying yourself with tea even if it was late already.

Still, he walked in silence in your kitchen, let you get away with the distraction. He waited in silence, unwilling to be the first to speak.

“Here you go,” you added as you handed him the grey mug he loved best. Two teabags. The same ritual you had performed for him hundreds, if not thousands of times…

“Thank you,” his voice was quiet and blank.

The atmosphere was heavy, suffocating, even. His heart was pounding, and Andrew didn’t have the strength to look at you. He shouldn’t have come. Being rejected once was painful enough, he didn’t need you to do it again…

“Thank you for coming tonight,” you said, hesitation making your voice quiet and small. “Do you want to sit down?” you added as you gestured towards the living room, but Andrew shook his head.

“No, I’d rather stand.”

Slowly, you nodded. You remained both standing there, under the pale light of your kitchen, your back to the sink and his to the counter open on the living room. He was still holding his tea, but he didn’t want to drink it. The heat sipping through the porcelain was a good distraction against his tight throat though.

“You… You want to eat something? I have some biscuits…”

“Y/N… thank you, but… I’d rather get this over with.”

You hummed, pulling on your sleeves until they covered your hands. Andrew noticed that you hadn’t made any tea for yourself.

“Right… We should… talk about what happened.”

“Did you go to the date? With Maggie?”

He finally looked up when you remained silent. You seemed taken aback by his question.

“Yeah… Yes, I did.”

“Did you sleep with her?”

“Andy!”

“What? We’re close enough for us to have sex, but I can’t know if you’ve found someone else?”

You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. He was getting annoyed by all this, angry even. Andrew longed for this to be over, for him to go home, get threateningly drunk, maybe smoke a joint or two to make sure he could numb the pain, and forget for a few hours that you existed.

And tomorrow he would get up, and pretend that all was fine, and he would do that again and again until he could think of you without wanting to cry…

“No, we didn’t sleep together.”

“How was the date?”

“Do you really want to know?”

“Yes, I do.”

You heaved a sigh.

“I stayed a grand total of fifteen minutes…”

He frowned at that.

“Really?”

“It felt wrong.”

You added nothing to that statement, and Andrew didn’t know what to do with it. Wrong because your date wasn’t nice? Or wrong because you wanted someone else?

“Did you see her again?”

“No… no, and I don’t think I will.”

“Why not?”

You shifted again, clearly uncomfortable.

“Look, Andy… this isn’t why I wanted to see you…”

“Really? Why, then?”

“You… you ran off. When I told you, you simply… ran off. I… I’m sorry. I should have handled this better, I… I know that I didn’t break the news in the best way. I was scared of how you would react.”

He raised an unimpressed eyebrow.

“Did you ever think that I could react well to you dumping my arse?”

“I didn’t dump you…”

“Really?”

“No, because we were not together.”

Andrew clenched his jaw, put down his untouched tea on the counter behind him. He averted his gaze, crossed his arms before his chest.

“I’m sorry, Andy. I should have handled that situation better. You… you’re important to me. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cause you pain.”

God, he didn’t know if he ought to cry or laugh at that.

“I know that I should have found a better way to tell you about this. But I… I hope that we can still be friends…”

“Friends?!”

He looked up again, stared at you with his mouth hanging open.

Friends?!

“No, Y/N. We’re not going to be friends.”

“But…”

“We’ve slept together. For months, we… Friends?!”

“That was our arrangement…”

“Our arrangement was a terrible idea. And it was… it was never an arrangement for me.”

“But we discussed things…”

“I shouldn’t have accepted.”

Slowly, you nodded.

It seemed to hurt you, that he showed regrets. But how could he not regret this?

He hated you for a moment, looking sad and scared like you didn’t want to lose him. And he hated you even more because he didn’t regret it. Not really. Despite all the pain he was feeling now, despite all the sleepless nights, and how desperate he was, he still didn’t regret it. He would have given anything to spend one last night with you. He would have gone through all this pain over and over again just to kiss you one more time. He would have done it all over again, just to hold you for one tiny minute…

He was bitter as he spoke. He didn’t care whether it would hurt you or not, he was too hurt himself to care about that. He needed to let it out. For once, he needed to do what was best for him, and not for you.

“Do you know what I wanted to tell you that night?”

You shook your head in silence, waiting for him to continue. You had mimicked his posture, were leaning against your sink with your arms crossed.

“I wanted to stop seeing you like this.”

Your mouth fell open in shock.

“I wanted to tell you that I… that I wanted to stop this stupid arrangement of ours. That I… That I wanted more. That I would have waited until you were ready to date again, no matter how long that would be, to be properly with you.”

His bottom lip trembled, your form was blurred with tears, but he held them back. They shone at the corners of his eyes, making the hazel turn green, but he didn’t cry.

“And you slept with me. We had sex. And then you blurted out that you didn’t give two fucks about me, and that you wanted to date someone else… after we just had sex! Do you realise how fucked up that is?!”

It was your turn to hold back your tears, averting your eyes.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, but that wasn’t good enough.

“I thought… after everything, I thought you would say yes. I thought you felt… something for me.”

“I… I do care about you, Andy, that’s not the point…”

“Do you? Is that why you thought it was respectful to have sex with me, and wait less than five minutes to reject me?!”

You didn’t say anything. He had raised his voice, although he was trying to keep it down. It made it powerful enough to make him intimidating, but shaky too, showing how vulnerable he was behind the layers of anger.

“Why did you do that? Why the fuck did you do that?!”

“Because… because I knew we had to stop this, and… I just… I know it was selfish, but I wanted to have one last night with you.”

He narrowed his eyes at you. Because it sounded like a good answer, a tempting one. You looked vulnerable, fragile even. As if this was a confession that was revealing too much of you.

But it was just a lie…

“We didn’t have one last night. We only had sex, Y/N.”

You stared at him for a while, but you refused to answer.

“You’ve only stayed once,” he reminded you. “You’ve only stayed once, and after that, it was like… like you didn’t want to remain more than twenty minutes alone with me unless we were having sex.”

“It… it was too hard to stay.”

“Too hard?”

“It was too emotional.”

His eyebrows shot up at that.

“Because having sex with me was not emotional to you? Really?”

“It’s different, and you know it.”

“No, I don’t know.”

“Acting like a couple, with domestic stuff, it’s… it’s different to fucking.”

The way you narrowed your eyes at him, the way you seemed worried now… yeah, Andrew guessed he wasn’t too good at hiding how much your words were hurting.

“Fucking… that’s all there was between us to you? That’s all I was to you?”

“That’s not what I meant...”

“That’s exactly what you meant! Christ! Are you telling me that you were just using me for sex all this time?! Why the fuck would you act like that with me if that was just about fucking, huh?! When we were… Jesus… when you…”

His voice broke, and he blinked tears away, but it wasn’t enough this time, he had to brush them off with the back of his hand.

“This is more complicated than that.”

“What’s complicated?”

“I can’t be with you, Andy. So… it was necessary to keep a certain distance, so we could still save our friendship…”

“Well, we didn’t save shit.”

“God, Andrew, I… I know that I’ve handled telling you about that stupid date badly… terribly even! But us not catching feelings was the plan all along! Don’t blame this on me!”

“So, you were just fucking me, then? All this time? There was nothing more than that?”

“Andy…”

“No! No, you answer me now! What the fuck, Y/N?! Are you really saying that I’ve been hallucinating all this time?! Because I thought… I thought you felt something… When we were lying in bed together, when we were…”

“Andy, you don’t understand.”

“No, you’re right! I don’t understand! We’ve slept together for months, several times a week, while spending our days together… we’ve been friends for years, and… and you didn’t feel anything when we were having sex? Nothing at all? Like… How could you feel nothing at all?”

“We agreed…”

“Fuck this agreement!” Andrew roared, and you visibly shook, his deep voice booming through the room. You had never heard him shout so loudly at anyone before. “Fuck your stupid rules! Fuck all this shit! How could you do this to me? How could you have sex with me and feel nothing! It felt…”

His voice broke, a tear rolled down his cheek, disappeared in his beard, caught a tiny speck of light before fading.

“It felt like it wasn’t just about pleasure. Like you were… like you… like I wasn’t just…”

He heaved a sigh, and all of a sudden he didn’t seem so tall, so intimidating. All of sudden, he was vulnerable and fragile and bent under a weight he couldn’t carry.

“God, Y/N… How could you do this to me?”

A pregnant pause stumbled across the space between your two bodies. It seemed an uncrossable chasm, a gap you couldn’t conquer anymore.

“I’m sorry, Andy… but you can’t put the blame only on me. You agreed to this. Everything was clear, we’ve discussed things…”

“But when we had sex…”

“Andy…”

“When we had sex, did you not feel anything? Something? Just… something… And what about after that? When we were holding onto each other? That morning when we had breakfast together…?”

You were blinking tears away, your arms tight around your own frame, fleeing him. Your body language was obvious, you were refusing to face the truth, or to admit it, at the very least.

“Why are you asking me this, why is it so important?”

“You truly don’t know the answer to that?”

“I don’t.”

“You fucking idiot...”

“Why would you have agreed to do this if that was not what you wanted? If you didn’t want me?”

“Didn’t want you?! Y/N… this is literally the opposite of what I’m saying!”

“I don’t understand!” you raised your voice too this time, following his lead. “We’ve discussed things! We agreed! You said you wanted me!”

“Of course, I wanted you!”

“Then why are you mad?”

“BECAUSE I WANT MORE!”

“WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY THAT?!”

“BECAUSE YOU WOULD HAVE LEFT! BECAUSE YOU DON’T…”

His voice cracked again, he let out a frustrated growl against himself and his bloody feelings that were bubbling all the way to the surface to overcome him and drown him in silence…

“WHAT… NEXT YOU’LL TELL ME YOU LOVE ME…”

“OF COURSE I DO!”

There it was, out in the open. He saw you freezing into place, eyes growing round. And he knew he had fucked up, but what was there left to destroy anyway? He couldn’t be just your friend anymore… he was losing you tonight, no matter what.

“I love you,” Andrew finally let out the words he had kept hidden for so long, they tasted sour in his mouth, and yet a weight was lifted from his chest. “I fucking love you. Of course, I love you. How could you not notice? I was always in love with you. And it was never just sex for me. It was always about making love to you. Did you… have you never made love to me? Not once? Was it just fucking? Really?”

You blinked at him. You seemed stunned in stillness, unable to move or do anything but stare at him with round eyes and parted lips. Andrew thought he knew how to understand your silence. He hated you for it. Despite all his love, while he held your blank gaze with his searching one, he hated you.

“Alright. Very well.”

He turned away, and didn’t look back as he crossed your home to the door.

“Don’t call me again, Y/N. I don’t want to hear about you ever again.” And then he was out in the street, in your driveway, into his car, driving, turning off the engines, closing the door of his car, opening his front door and stepping into his home, taking off his shoes and jacket, walking upstairs and into his bathroom and entering the shower with his clothes on. And when the cold water hit his face he finally allowed himself to let out a shout.

#andrew hozier byrne #hozier #the hoziest #hozier x reader #hozier x you #hozier x y/n #hozier x fem!reader #hozier fanfiction #hozier fanfic #hozier series #hozier imagine #fanfiction #fanfic #series #writing

[w2soneshots]

Baby daddy -W2S

Words: 0.9k+

Warnings: angst, unplanned pregnancy.

Summary: after a one night stand you find yourself pregnant with Harry’s baby, you go to Faith for advice then tell Harry. But how does he react?

a/n: hello my loves😚. Here’s the request! I love this idea and I hope you all enjoy🧸🫶🏼

"No. There's no way. I'm gonna do another one." My brain rambled as I stared at the pregnancy test. I reached for the small box. It's empty. Within thirty minutes I had used the entire box, all positive. "This can't be happening. I can't be pregnant." I thought, in complete denial. I didn't know what to do with myself. It's not just any normal night I can't just eat dinner and go to sleep. I just found out that I'm pregnant with my friend's baby. I barely slept that night.

A week later I was still trying to process the news. I knew exactly when it had happened. One night (around five weeks ago) I went out with everyone for Freya's birthday. We all got really drunk and I had been touch deprived for so long that somehow I ended up waking up in Harry's apartment, next to him in his bed. Thankfully he was still asleep when I woke so I grabbed my things and bolted. We had completely ignored the fact that we had sex and since no one knew it wasn't really a problem. Until now.

I decided that I needed to talk to someone. I couldn't keep this bottled up for another second or I felt as though I might explode. Faith is who I choose to tell. I know I can trust her and she's my only friend who's actually a mum. "Hey. Are you free anytime today? x" I asked via text. She replied quickly. "Ethan's filming so I'm here with Olive all day. Do you wanna come here? xx" I let out a sigh of relief. "That would be great! I'll see you in 30 xx" "Come through the glass door. It'll be unlocked xx"

I quickly got ready into a sweat set, brushed my hair into a ponytail then grabbed my phone and left. I drove to Faith's house and in just twenty minutes was waiting for her to open the gate. Once I'd parked I hoped from the car. I walked round the house to the glass doors. Then slid it open. I heard Rolo barking then Faith came shuffling into the lounge. "Hi! How've you been?" She pulled me into a quick hug. "Uhm, pretty good." I replied. She furrowed her brows. "What's up?" Uncontrollable tears welled in my eyes. "Oh my god. Come sit." She led me over to the couch.

"Ok start from the beginning." She said once I had calmed down. I took a deep breath. "So you know when we went out for Freya's birthday?" "Mhm." She nodded. "Well I- um- I ended up at Harry's apartment." Her brows furrowed. "I barely remember it but I know we- you know-" "you had sex with Harry?!" She exclaimed.

"Wow. Have you talked about it since?" She asked. "No but I didn't come round to tell you about that." Her face contorted into confusion. "Oh, what did you want to talk about?" She softened. My eyes fluttered closed. "I'm pregnant." I whispered. She went silent. "Congratulations?" She wasn't sure what to say. "Thanks. I uh- I don't really know how to feel." "And it's Harry's?" I nodded. "Well you know I'm here if you need absolutely anything." I smiled lightly at her. "I know." She pulled me into a warm hug.

After I talked to Faith I decided it was time to tell Harry. He deserves to know. But I booked a doctor's appointment first, to one hundred percent confirm that I'm pregnant. I hadn't really had any symptoms other than the fact I had missed my period, which is why I took the test. After a quick blood test the nurse confirmed it. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I had been in complete denial the entire time and this made it real, I'm going to be a mother.

It was almost two weeks after I had found out when me and Harry eventually saw each other. I sent him a text and he had agreed to come round to my apartment. I hadn't told him much just that I needed to talk. When he arrived my heartbeat sped up and my palms began to sweat. I opened the door after taking a deep breath. I smiled lightly at him. "Hi. Come in." I stepped aside. He awkwardly walked in. We sat on my couch.

In seconds I blurted out "I'm pregnant." His mouth dropped open and the room fell silent. "You- what?" He stuttered. "I'm pregnant Harry." I repeated. He swallowed. "And it's mine?" I nodded. "Uh- I- wow." I didn't know what to do, he wasn't talking this very well. "Listen, I don't expect anything from you. I just thought you should know." I spoke softly. "I just- I-" suddenly he jumped from the sofa and bolted out of my apartment. I burst into tears. I really thought- well I wasn't sure what I thought.

I told Faith about the incident and she attempted to comfort me. "He just needs to process it. Like you did. He'll come around. Give him time." She had said. That calmed me and almost a week went by with nothing until I got a knock on my door. I pushed myself from the sofa, that I'd been sat on all day since I wasn't feeling the best. I froze when I saw Harry standing outside my door. He didn't give me time to say a word. "y/n please forgive me. I'm so sorry. I don't know why I reacted like that. I want to do this with you. I want to be a dad." He said quickly. A smile spread across my face. Then I stepped forward pulling his nervous frame into a soft hug.

Years later me and Harry sat in our beautiful house watching our two young kids playing together. Reminiscing about what brought us to this moment. Happy, content and in love.

#w2s #harry lewis #harry w2s #wrotoshaw #wroetoshaw #w2s x reader #w2s fic #w2s imagine #wroetoshaw x reader #wroetoshaw oneshot #harry lewis x reader #harry x reader #youtuber x reader #sidemen x reader #british youtubers #fanfic #image #oneshot #x fem!reader #x female reader #x y/n #x you #x reader #unplanned pregnancy #pregnancy #dad!harry #angst #angst with a happy ending

[ysrjune]

hi! i know you don't usually write for clay, so feel free to delete this if you want. but, if youre up for it, I'd love to see inpatient!clay beresford x inpatient!reader (maybe also w heart condition i have one and i just think it would be cute). and like maybe they both have surgery on the same day or smth soft of them comforting each other through this or smth idk i just need patient!reader w clay so bad 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 ( if u like angst also im not against one of them dying at the end)

My Baby

i’m so sorry that I replied to this so late, but hey.. at least I responded, right 🥰⁉️ thank you for your ask <3

summary ✦ clay and reader have heart surgery the same day, and they comfort each other.

“We’ll be okay.” Clay runs his fingers through your hair in hopes it will calm you down. your surgery was less than a few hours away, and you were scared. what if the doctors do something wrong that ends up in death for you or clay.. or both. Clay was your everything, and you couldn't bare to lose him.

“You don't know that for sure.” she sighed, looking up at Clay to say something else, but he beat her to it. “Yes I do. what kind of hospital hires doctors that don't know how to be doctors.” he was just trying to make you feel better. he knew there were always risks in any situation for surgery. “After this, we're gonna be fine, sweetie. more than fine.” he kissed your cheek. “we'll start our own family and be happy the rest of our lives without being scared of randomly dying on the spot.”

Clay was always better with coming to peace with his condition, so much so that it didn't bother him to make jokes about randomly dying on the spot. you, on the other hand, were really scared of dying and not being able to fulfill a good enough life. you wanted to have fun, find a suitable husband to raise a family with, and be the best wife & mother you could be. so, the thought of death being able to take you out of nowhere was terrifying.

“clay, dont say that. It's not funny.” you look down to his chest. “I just.. want us to live the life we deserve.”, “and we will. I'm telling you, baby, nothing bad is gonna happen, you'll see.” he placed a gentle kiss on your lips.

—

the time finally came, and you were being pushed on the hospital beds to the surgery rooms. Clay held your hand the whole way there since his bed was next to yours. “I love you, clay. with all my weak heart has to give.” he wanted to burst into tears. this could he the last time you see each other. as much as he didn't wanna think about it, he did. his beautiful angel being taken away from him or him being taken away from you, ending up in not giving you the life you wanted with him. still, he put a smile on and looked at your wedding ring, then his. “I love you too, y/n. I'll never stop loving you.” even the nurses who were pushing your beds wanted to cry.

“if anything happens, you were the one for me, baby. the only one. the girl of my dreams.” he gives the softest half smile as you're close to parting ways to different rooms. “I'll see you out of surgery, honey.” you respond, kissing your fingers and placing it on his hand. he shed a tear and nodded as you split ways.

—

things were going great for the first half of everything that the doctors did. but then something went wrong.. very wrong. the heart wasnt receiving enough blood flow. the doctors didn't even notice until it was too late. how could they break the news? after the nurses told them about how all you two wanted was to stay here on earth with each other and raise a baby of your own. that didn't matter anymore. you were dead.

Clay woke up from surgery, his mother and a couple of friends by his bed. his first instinct was to look over to the bed next to him so he could see you. nothing. the bed was empty. it made his still fragile heart begin to beat fast in worry. “where is she?” he looked to his mother with teary eyes. “where is my wife?” his voice cracked. he was staring to cry. did you make it? please, God, he hoped you made it and you were just put in a different room.

All his mother and friends did was frown at him, crying as well. Clay sucked in air and started to cry. sniffling while shaking his head, he still kept looking to the bed. “No, no, no. this wasn't how it was supposed to go. youre all lying.” his cries were heartbreaking. “Mom?” he switched his gaze to her, hoping it was all a lie.. a dream.. a hallucination. anything but the truth.

“I'm sorry, Clay.” that was it. you were officially gone. his baby was gone. not just you, but the baby he could have given you. the baby he could love and see you through the eyes of your child.

Clay never emotionally recovered from that. he never dated either. never even dared to stare or flirt with another woman. all he ever did was work, drink, visit your grave, and go to bed. occasionally visit some friends and family, but that was it. his life was never the same without you. he kept all your things. he sprayed your signature perfume on your pillow thst he cuddled with to just pretend you were still there with him.

Clay Beresford was absolutely miserable for the rest of his life without you.

｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

taglist: @anakinstwinklebunny @heartsforanakin @anisscarletstarlet @sockiess @erosmutt @rottencandyblood @radiantvader @freezerbride95 @starsfortaylor 🎀

#june replies ౨ৎ #clay beresford x you #clay beresford angst #awake 2007 #hayden christensen #hayden christensen fic #hayden christensen x reader #hayden christensen imagine #hayden christensen angst #hayden christensen drabble #hayden christensen blurb

[badasbebi]

imagination's curse

navigation

✦ pairing: bada lee x fem!reader

✦ summary: you long for excitement in your mundane life, until you are suddenly visited by a strange, beautiful woman who upends your world and thrusts you into a whirlwind of pleasure and danger.

✦ genre/au: smut (MDNI!!), succubus!bada, basically pwp

✦ word count: 6k

✦ warnings: probably has grammatical/spelling errors, mentions of demons and occult activities, top!bada (she's doing all the work), fingering, cunnilingus, bit of thigh riding, y/n is a weakling, somebody dies (or do they?)

✦ a/n: this is very different from other fics I've written, in genre and length, because after watching bebe's imagination video on repeat, i decided to temporarily drop the other fic i was working on to write this! we will be getting back to the more simple (and long) fics I've written before, but i hope you guys still enjoy this in the meantime! i purposely left this open-ended in case i, or you guys, wanted to see a continuation of this story at some point. lmk if that would be of interest to y'all!

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Beyond the restaurant windows, rain pounds against the earth. The rhythmic drumming of the rain lulls you into a trance-like state, eyes glossing over and body becoming numb. The soft jazz music coming from the speakers overhead only enhances your drowsiness, making you melt into your seat like heated wax. You rest your chin in the palm of your hand and stare out at the street, watching cars pass by and disappear into the darkness. Your eyelids become heavy and you blink, attempting to bring your attention back to the real world, and, probably most importantly, the person in front of you. 

You sigh, slouching forward in your chair. Your date, Seolhyun, has been droning on for the last twenty minutes about her schoolwork. Her mouth is moving, but your mind isn't registering her words. You can't bring yourself to care. She seems somewhat nice, and she's devastatingly pretty, but those were about the only two qualities of value that you could conjure up. This wouldn't have been so bad, if this date hadn't essentially turned into a one-sided conversation she was having with herself.  You don't think you've said more than three words since the both of you sat down.

"Like, nursing is so boring and depressing. I don't get why so many people are into it," she says, taking a bite of her food. "I want to do something interesting and fresh, like, modeling, or something. Or, maybe I'll switch my major to art. I take really good pictures of my friends. Isn't there a photography concentration in the arts program?"

Seolhyun looks over at you expectantly, waiting for your input. You have no idea what the answer is, so you just shrug and give her a fake, tight-lipped smile. 

"Yeah, you know what? I think I'm gonna talk to my advisor tomorrow. It's just that my dad is the problem. Whenever I talk to my dad he's like, nooooo. That's not what I've been sending you money for. He's so old fashioned."

"Oh," you respond, your voice monotone. There is a part of you that can't help but feel a little bad about zoning out and ignoring her, but you've had your fill of boring conversations about family and school and life aspirations. This was nothing new. 

She slams one of her hands on the table, making you jump so high you nearly knock your glass of water over. 

"And it's silly because he's the one who wanted me to go to college sooo badly, so how are you going to complain about paying for it? Its like—and not to sound like a cunt—we do pretty well for ourselves. I don't need to be the moneymaker! I get he wants me to be the head nurse at the hospital he owns, but honestly, fuck that hospital. Fuck the patients too!" she continues, her voice raised loud enough to capture the attention of  the nearby tables. You can feel their eyes on you, and a wave of embarrassment washes over you. You glance around the room, trying not to make eye contact with anyone, slowly sliding down in your seat.

 "He's just...he's such a hardass. Doesn't let me do anything. It's a real shame," she finishes, huffing in annoyance.

You nod. "Right, it is a real shame." you mumble, still avoiding others' judgemental gazes. 

She doesn't seem to notice how uncomfortable you've become, or the attention that she's gathering. Instead, she grins."I know! I'm so glad you get it."

The only thing you're getting is murderous. You needed to get out of here, quickly. As if hearing your internal cries for help, the waiter appears, asking if the two of you would like to see the dessert menu. You shake your head.

"Oh, no. Just the check please," you say, glancing up at him.

Seolhyun nods in agreement. "Yeah, I'm done. This salad was kinda trash. No offense. Sorry." She picks up her napkin and dabs it at her mouth. 

The waiter grimaces. "No problem. I'll be right back."

As the waiter walks off, you turn back to Seolhyun, forcing yourself to smile. She jumps right back into her complaints, albeit more quietly, and fidgets with the stem of her wine glass. You tune her out again, no longer feeling guilty for doing so. The only thing that brings your attention back to reality is the waiter setting the bill face-down on the table. He bids you both goodnight before walking off, and when you look up, you almost want to laugh.  

A guilty expression flashes across Seolhyun's face, and she leans over the table, looking at the check. She clears her throat, and you already know what she's about to say. 

"Do you have your card on you? Sorry, I think I left mine at home. I'll totally venmo you after this." She laughs awkwardly, sitting back in her seat.

You roll your eyes, but reach for your wallet. "Whatever." 

After dinner, the two of you step out of the restaurant and into the rain, huddling under the overhang as you try to find an escape from the downpour. 

"Well, it was nice chatting with you, y/n," she says, stepping towards the edge of the overhang. "Hope we can hang out again soon."

"Yeah, definitely," you lie. 

"Awesome! Talk to you late, then." she smiles, and you know she's lying too.

Seolhyun walks out into the rain and you watch as she crosses the street, heading toward a pink Tesla. 

"Bitch," you murmur bitterly, pulling your hood over your head.

You don't want to spend money on an Uber, and the walk to the nearest bus stop isn't very far, so you decide to trek through the rain, praying that the bus won't take long. You zip up your coat and put your hood over your head, stepping out into the rain. The cold pelts against your face and seeps through the material of your clothes, causing goosebumps to break out on your skin. You curse, and pull your arms in close to your body, walking faster. The streetlamps lining the road provide enough light for you to see where you're going despite the dark clouds overhead, their glow casting an orange glow against the pavement.

As you walk, your thoughts turn back to your disastrous date. You didn't mean to act like such an ass, but it was impossible not to when the entire evening had consisted of her talking about herself and how difficult her life was. The worst part is, she actually seemed to think you were a good listener, even with your blank stares and monosyllabic responses.

Deep down, you know that it's not entirely Seolhyun's fault. Today felt like a culmination of all the ways you've been failing lately. In short, it's been a bad week. A bad month. A bad year. At all points, you've felt as though there was no escape from the dullness of your life, like you were being suffocated, drowned in a pool of water with no way to save yourself. These were your college years, and you came to the realization last year that all you've been doing was sitting in your dorm, studying, going to class, and then going home. No parties, no drama, no adventures, no romance, nothing. Even worse, it seemed like everyone else had already started their lives and were living them. It was infuriating, seeing everyone around you have fun, while you were stuck in this weird limbo of mediocrity.

In attempts to find some excitement, you downloaded a dating app and started going out more, meeting people, but so far, all the dates have ended up being like this one. Boring, or just plain awkward. You've tried to make changes—different clothes, makeup, hair—anything to shake things up, and while that was nice and made you feel pretty, it didn't change the fact that your life was still dull. And now, you're just exhausted, constantly feeling like you're going through the motions.

 Nothing has worked. This was probably the tenth horrible date you've been on in two months. Maybe, this was just your life now, and you had to come to terms with it. Bland, and as bleak as the clouds overhead.  

Which seem to have gotten even darker, you notice, as you approach the bus stop. You stand underneath the shelter, rubbing your hands together and blowing on them. The streets are completely deserted. You shiver, your damp clothes clinging to your skin, and hug yourself tightly, trying to keep warm. You try to look for any sign of the bus, but the rain is coming down too hard, the air is heavy with fog, and you can't see further than a few feet away. A prickle of fear runs down your spine. You didn't even think to check if the buses were running late. What if they're not running at all?

Just as you reach for your phone to check the time, you hear the screeching of bus brakes and let out a sigh of relief. You're saved.

You stand at the edge of the sidewalk, watching as the bus slowly pulls up in front of the stop. The door opens and you step inside, moving as quickly as you can. The warm air instantly hits your face, but the heat does nothing to thaw the chill that has set in your bones. You pay the driver, and walk to the back, taking a seat near the window. The bus is nearly empty, save for an old woman and a couple of teenagers sitting towards the front.

You pull your phone out of your pocket and plug in your earbuds. Music starts playing, drowning out the noise of the rain and the rumble of the engine.

After a few stops, the bus reaches your destination and the doors open, the sound of the rain pouring down and the wind blowing in, bringing with it a cool breeze. You get off, and begin the trek home, your sneakers splashing through puddles as you make your way down the street.

The wind picks up, the gusts blowing hard enough to cause the street lamps to flicker and sway. They cast shadows against the ground and walls of the buildings, which appear and disappear in the blink of an eye. The rain comes down harder, falling in thick, heavy sheets. You quicken your pace, the muscles in your legs burning as you move, your heart rate quickening. 

Finally, your apartment building comes into view.  You run, sprinting the last block and darting up the steps, the water squishing between your toes. Excitement blooms in your chest as you grab the door handle and pull it open, the prospect of a dry place to lay your head making you feel better.

As soon as you cross the threshold of your building, you pull your hood down, the smell of mildew hitting your nose. Your shoes squeak against the wet floor, and you leave a trail of water droplets and mud as you head toward the elevator.

The ride up is excruciatingly slow. You tap your foot impatiently, watching the numbers climb, and think about the warm bed that's awaiting you, how good it'll feel to wrap yourself in a blanket and forget about this miserable night. If your roommate allows it.

Once your mind drifts to her, your excitement dwindles. Fatigue weighs heavy on your shoulders, and you long for nothing more than to be asleep in the comfort of your own bed, but you know it's a rubbish wish, thanks to Aeri. 

Recently, home hasn't been particularly enjoyable either. You used to have a roommate who didn't bother you. Then, she dropped out, and you were stuck with rent, an empty room, and the task of finding a new roommate. It was a difficult process, with most candidates seeming creepy or annoying or gross. Then, you ran into Aeri, who was by no means a perfect match, but seemed good enough. She was a bit awkward, and you didn't really know what to make of the intense gothic attire she was sporting during your initial meeting. She seemed incredibly nice and easygoing, though, and she smelled good. Was that not all you needed? So, running out of time, you swallowed your apprehension and gave her the spare keys to your apartment.  

For the most part, you didn't regret your decision. She was, in fact, one of the sweetest, most caring people you've ever met, frequently baking treats for you when she knew you were having a particularly terrible day and listening to you vent  about your dating diasters. But, there were a few small issues that had cropped up, and they happened to occur most often at night.

Your stomach does flip-flops the higher the numbers get, until, finally, the elevator dings, and the doors open. You shuffle out into the hall, pulling out your keys and heading toward the apartment. When you're in front of the door, you hesitate, the key hovering in the air as you stare at the peephole. You take a deep breath and push the door open, the smell of incense instantly hitting your nose as you step inside of the dark apartment. You slip off your wet shoes and hang your jacket up on your worn-out coat rack. 

"I'm back," you call, closing the door behind you. You step further into the apartment and glance around as you walk into the living room, where you are met with a sight you're not prepared for.

Your eyes squint to adjust to the dark and take in the scene before you. The air is thick and heavy, engulfed by the scent of a sweet, intoxicating perfume. Candles are placed throughout the space, their warm glow casting shadows on the wall. Aeri kneels in the middle of the living room, wearing a cloak, her hands hovering above an intricate pentagram on the floor. She mumbles something to herself that you cannot understand, her eyes closed. Her hair falls over her face and her lips move, but no words are uttered.

"Aeri, what are you doing?" you ask, taking a tentative step forward.

Aeri's head snaps up, her eyes wide, and the mumbling stops.

"Oh, hey, you're back," she says, her tone a bit nervous. Her hands tremble as she moves the hood of her cloak back. "Sorry, I didn't know you'd be back so soon. I was just—uh—you know."

"No, actually. I don't. What are you doing?" You repeat, folding your arms in front of you.

She looks around the room, before returning her gaze to you. "Uh...meditating?"

And this was the problem. Shortly after Aeri moved in, she brought her witchy occult shit with her. You don't really believe in any of it, so you typically ignore her and carry on with your day when you see her pull out one of her spellbooks at the dinner table. Except for days like this, when she goes too far, gets too loud, and keeps you up at night with her antics. Then, she becomes public enemy number one. 

You glare at her. "With a pentagram on the floor? Please. This is..."

You pause, scanning the room again. There's something particularly wrong today, but you can't quite place it. There's heaviness in the air, a heightened version of the feeling you get when you're in a haunted house, except there are no clowns or people cosplaying as serial killers, just candles and a pentagram and Aeri, staring up at you. 

"Bizarre. This is bizarre. Even for you." you finish, narrowing your eyes. "What's going on?"

"Nothing!" She squeaks, her voice strained. "I was just...doing some reading about a spell that could, uh. Fix a problem that I’ve been having. I decided to try it out today"

You pinch the bridge of your nose and let out an exasperated sigh. You're tired. Your hair is drenched. Your shirt is clinging to your back. You couldn't be bothered with this. 

"Listen, I don't think I actually care about what you have going on. But, I have an exam tomorrow, I've had a rough day, and I need some rest. Can you promise to keep it down in here while I sleep?"

Aeri looks around, a guilty expression on her face, before nodding her head. "Sure, yeah. No problem. I’m sorry."

"Thank you," you say, and turn on your heels without another word.

You make your way through the hallway and enter your bedroom, shutting the door behind you.

Your room is dark and cold, but you can't bother to turn the lights on or get under the covers. Instead, you lay down on the bed, your limbs splayed out. Your hair is still wet, and you can feel the moisture seeping into your comforter, but you can't even think to move.

You're too tired to bother changing into your pajamas. Too tired to do anything but sleep. So, you shove off your socks and rain-soaked jeans and call it a day. You crawl into bed, pulling the blankets over your body until they rest just below your chin. The warmth envelopes you and you're finally able to relax. You stare up at the ceiling, watching the fan spin slowly, praying for a peaceful night's rest. Lately, you've been plagued by strange dreams you can't remember when you wake up. Although they've been forgetful, they usually keep you tossing and turning in your sleep throughout the night. But, tonight, your eyelids are so heavy you can barely keep them open, and within seconds, you drift off into unconsciousness, the world slipping away and the darkness consuming you. The smell of Aeri's incense and the sound of the rain lulls you into a slumber unlike never before, submerged into a dark void of nothing.  

That is, until you feel something touch you. You awaken with a start, jolting upright in your bed, your heart racing. The room is dark, illuminated only by the light of the moon shining through the window. You glance around frantically, searching for the source of the touch, but there's nothing, no sign of life. Just shadows, and the sound of your breathing. You close your eyes, taking a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. It's probably just the wind or an insect. You're tired, and your deteriorating mind is playing tricks on you. There's nothing to be scared of.

You lay back down, pulling the blankets up to your chin, and take a deep breath, closing your eyes. Your heartbeat begins to slow, and you exhale, trying to relax. A few minutes pass, and you begin to drift off once again, when, suddenly, you feel something against your neck. A cold, soft pressure. Like a feather, brushing across your skin.

"Y/N." A soft, gentle voice whispers.

Your eyes flutter open, and you are met with the sight of a woman's face, inches away from yours. You gasp and shoot up again, nearly slamming your forehead against hers. The woman backs away, allowing you to regain your bearings. You blink a few times, shaking your head to try to wake yourself up, but she remains., staring at you with an expression that could only be described as amused. 

The moonlight streams in through the window, giving the woman's figure an almost ethereal glow. You've never seen her before. She has a stupefying, otherworldly, beauty about her, with dark eyes and full lips that accentuate her sharp jawline. She's wearing a black, silky nightgown that clings to her body. Her pale, delicate-looking skin shines in the moonlight, and her dark hair, interlaced with another color, cascades down her back, falling over her shoulders.

You look around the room, expecting the lights to turn on and an elaborate prank to be revealed, but the room is just as dark and empty as you remember. When your eyes fall back onto the woman, she is staring back at you, a soft smile on her face.

"Who the fuck are you?" you force out, your voice trembling.  

She quirks an eyebrow, tilting her head to the side. "Were you not expecting me?"

You scoff, nearly choking on your own saliva. "No! Of course not. I've never seen you before in my life. What the hell is going on? And how do you know my name?"

Her eyes light up with mirth, and her smile widens as if she's in on some sort of joke. 

"Oh, this is interesting," she starts, clasping her hands together. "This is very interesting."

As a primal fear takes hold of your body, interesting is the last word that comes to your brain to describe the situation you've found yourself in. Albeit hot, this random woman broke into your apartment to do God knows what to you and your belongings. Who knows if she's already murdered Aeri. Or, perhaps, this is a lucid dream, and you're experiencing some sort of weird hallucination. Either way, you wanted out. Now.

You release a shaky exhale in a poor attempt to calm your nerves. "I'm gonna call the cops, okay? But, I really don't want any trouble. If you leave now, I won't tell anyone about this." 

The woman stares at you for a moment, her expression unreadable, before erupting into a fit of laughter. You blink, unsure of how to proceed. She continues to laugh, her hand clutching her chest as her whole body shakes. The sound is melodic, and it rings out like the chimes of a bell, the notes flowing effortlessly into the air. It's almost enchanting, and you find yourself lost in the melody until she quiets down and straightens up, a soft smile on her face. 

"That's completely unnecessary. I'm not here to cause you any harm, Y/N," she says, and, somehow, her voice is even more hypnotic than her laugh. Some of your fear dissipates, but the confusion remains.

"Why are you here, then?" you question, unable to keep the suspicion out of your tone.

"To give you a little bit of help. I know you've been struggling." She replies, her voice dripping with sympathy.

"How do you know that?"

She smiles, the expression making her features seem even more radiant than before. "I know a lot of things. 'How' is irrelevant. What's more important is that I know exactly how I can help you tonight. You need...a stress reliever. I can do that for you. If you're up for it, that is."

"A stress reliever?" You echo, and the way her eyes sparkle in the moonlight, her lips quirked up in a seductive smirk, her voice low and smooth, makes it abundantly clear what she's implying. Your cheeks flush and heat rushes through your body. This couldn't be real. Could it?

"I don't think we're on the same page. I mean, a...stress reliever. I don't know if I understand," you say, shifting uncomfortably.

"You're a bit slow, aren't you?" she asks a devilish grin stretching across her face, and, she's probably right. You feel like a fish out of water, opening and closing your mouth like an idiot. The worst part of it is, she seems to be enjoying your floundering, grinning wider as she watches you stutter. 

"There's no need to worry," she purrs, taking a step closer, her dark eyes shining. "You just need to relax. It'll be fun." 

The sane, rational part of your brain is screaming, yelling, begging for you to run out of the room. Anybody with half a brain could decipher that the sensible thing to do in this situation would be to flee, grab a weapon, and call the police. Yet, here you are, lying still, the woman's words ringing in your ears. Fun. It's been a long time since you've had fun. You can't even remember the last time you've gotten remotely close to it. And, as if she was sent from above, here was a beautiful, mysterious woman, offering it to you on a platter. You can't help but be a bit curious. Curious about the strange, magical feeling that's coursing through your veins.

 Plus, your body is aching for touch, and the idea of sleeping with a beautiful woman is incredibly tempting, especially in your state. It's been months since you've had sex.

The woman takes a step closer, and your stomach does a flip. This is stupid. It's dangerous, and stupid, and it would be so easy to say no. 

"You won't hurt me, right?" You ask, a nervous edge creeping into your voice.

"You'll enjoy every second we spend together," she says, her eyes stroking over you. Her gaze is so intense, her voice so soothing, all you want is to please her. You don't think. You no longer have the ability to.  Your desire is too strong.

"What are you going to do?" you ask, the words tumbling out of your mouth.

"That depends on you," she says, her fingers brushing the edge of the duvet. "What would you like me to do?"

You look into her dark, all-consuming eyes, and shiver. Your blood feels like it's on fire.   "I—um—whatever you had in mind." 

Her eyes narrow, her lips curling up into a smirk. She leans in, her warm breath ghosting your lips. You can smell her perfume, the scent of vanilla and lavender assaulting your senses.  

Your heart beats fast, and you can't help the small whimper that escapes your throat.

"Are you sure?" she says, her voice low. "You don't know what you're getting yourself into."

She's right. For all you knew, her idea of fun could include a knife and a casket. But you couldn't bring yourself to care, not when she's looking at you like that. 

"I don't care," you say, your voice hoarse. "Do whatever you want with me."

The corners of her lips curl upwards, and her eyes twinkle with mischief.  "Okay," she whispers, her voice soft and sweet.

She leans forward, her lips ghosting yours. You hold your breath, anticipating her next move. Her hand moves up to cup your cheek, her thumb rubbing small circles on your skin that send a tingle down your spine. You lean into the touch, and her smile widens. She tilts her head to the side, and presses a kiss to the corner of your lips. The contact is soft, tender, and sweet. Her lips are warm, and the touch is brief, but enough to ignite the flames within your veins. You gasp, moving your head to try to capture her lips with yours, and she chuckles, pulling away.

"You're so impatient," she says, her eyes gleaming. "Desperate, even."

Embarrassment creeps up on you, and you flush, averting your gaze. She laughs again, and grabs your chin, forcing you to look at her.

"Don't hide from me," she whispers, her voice soft. "There's nothing wrong with wanting something."

With her words, the fire within you flares, and the embers within your belly burst into an inferno. Your whole body is burning, yearning, and you can't help the sigh that escapes your throat. She hums, staring at you with her piercing gaze. You've never felt this exposed, so vulnerable, so completely bare in front of another person, and you are still partially clothed. She seems to be studying you, taking in every detail, memorizing the expressions on your face. She's looking at you like you're prey, a feast, and it should scare you, should make you tremble, but it doesn't.

"Kiss me," you murmur, and she obeys.

You let out a small gasp, and her lips curve into a smile against yours as you make contact. Your eyes flutter shut, and the warmth of her mouth almost sends you spiraling. The feeling is electric, like a bolt of lightning, and it sets every nerve ending within your body alight. Her tongue glides along your bottom lip, and you part them willingly, allowing her all of the access she desires. Her tongue is warm, and wet, and her kisses are intoxicating. She tastes sweet, like strawberries and vanilla, and you can't help but moan.

She pulls away, prompting an involuntary whimper from you."Is this what you wanted, y/n?"

"Yes—uh," you stop yourself, realizing that you still don't know her name. 

"Bada," she supplies, as if reading your mind. She places a hand on your chest, and gently pushes you back onto the bed, her gaze locked on yours. You fall onto the mattress, your eyes wide.

"Bada," you repeat softly, tasting the name on your lips. Pretty. 

She smiles and slips the blankets off of you. The cool air hits your skin, sending goosebumps along your arms and legs. You suck in a sharp breath, and her eyes rake over you, drinking in the sight.

"Beautiful," she whispers, her fingers tracing up your thigh. 

She leans down to press a gentle kiss on your jaw. Her lips travel down your neck, and she bites at the sensitive skin, hard. A moan slips from your mouth, and she sucks and licks at the spot, soothing the sting. Her hand trails up the inside of your thigh, and her fingertips graze the band of your underwear. You arch your back, yearning for her touch.

"Please," you whimper again, and she giggles. 

"At least you're polite," she says, biting down on your neck again. 

Her teeth scrape against your skin, and you gasp, grabbing a fistful of her hair. You pull her closer, desperate to remove any shred of distance between the two of you. She groans, her nails digging into your thigh, her touch searing hot. She sucks at the tender skin below your collarbone, and you whine, heat pooling between your legs. It was a little humiliating, getting so worked up despite the fact that she's barely done anything, but it was hard not to when she's touching as if she wants nothing more than to devour you. 

"So impatient," she purrs, her eyes gleaming. "So needy."

She kisses the mark she made on your neck, and you squirm, the pressure between your thighs growing. 

Her fingers move higher, ghosting over your underwear, and you writhe under her touch, letting out a frustrated groan. She pulls away, a smirk on her lips.

"Something wrong?"

"You're fucking with me," you hiss, and she laughs out loud. 

"Your impatience is cute," she says, her fingers brushing against the sensitive skin on your neck, pausing where your heartbeat pulsed, right beneath your jaw. "Can't help it." 

You watch as she moves her hand away from your neck, back to your underwear. Her fingers slip under the band of your panties, already dark and wet, and she runs them through your folds, spreading your already abundant slickness.  You couldn't stand that you were so clearly proving her point about how needy you were, giving her more to make fun of you about, but how could you not be? It's been too long. and you don't know if it's ever felt this good this early on.  

Your head falls back onto the pillow, and your hands clutch at the sheets, desperate for purchase. The feeling of her thumb brushing against your clit makes your hips buck up, and she pulls away to pull down your panties.

You shiver, the cool air hitting your exposed skin. She grabs your thighs, spreading them apart, and the anticipation nearly kills you on the spot.

"So pretty," she says, her voice filled with wonder.

She looks up at you, her eyes darker than before. She holds your gaze, and without breaking eye contact, ducks her head, and swipes her tongue along your slit.

A moan escapes your lips, and your back arches, your fingers threading through her hair. Her tongue moves in circles, and you feel her hands grasp at your thighs as you inadvertently try shut them close around her head. She spreads them further apart, and presses her mouth against your center, sucking on the bundle of nerves.

"F—fuck," you moan, your head thrown back, eyes shut.

She moans into you, the vibrations causing pleasure to erupt inside of you. You grip the sheets, the fabric crumpling underneath your fingers. She pulls away, and your eyes fly open, only to meet her intense gaze.

"Watch me," she whispers, her voice husky.

Your eyes snap to her face, and she smiles, her fingers trailing down your stomach. You squirm under her touch, and she grips your thighs, her eyes locked on yours. Her staring does something to you, makes the goosebumps rise on your skin, a funny feeling arise in your stomach. She presses her lips against the inside of your thigh, her eyes not leaving yours.

She slips a finger inside of you, and you gasp, the sudden intrusion causing a wave of pleasure to wash over your body. She curls her finger, and you arch your back, the friction driving you crazy.

"That's it," she purrs, adding another finger.

You throw your head back, moaning as she begins to thrust her fingers, moving in a steady rhythm. You clench around her fingers, and her eyes widen, a mischievous glint shining in her irises. You bite your lip, the pressure building, and she smirks, increasing the pace of her movements. She crooks her fingers, hitting a sensitive spot inside of you. 

"Fuck," you cry out, and her lips curl upwards, pleased.

She leans forward, her lips capturing yours, her tongue invading your mouth. She swallows your moans, and you can feel her smiling against your lips. She pulls away, and rests her forehead against yours, her dark eyes boring into yours.

"Are you going to come for me, y/n?"

"Y-yes," you whimper, and she laughs, her hot breath fanning against your cheek.

She thrusts her fingers faster, and her thumb rubs against your clit, sending waves of pleasure throughout your body. Your breaths come out short and quick, and your head spins, the room spinning.

"Come on," she whispers, her voice low and sultry.

The pressure builds, and you can feel the edge coming. You gasp, your eyes shut, and your whole body tenses up, the pleasure rippling through your body. You let out a string of curses, and she slows her movements, riding out the aftershocks. 

"That's it," she murmurs, her fingers leaving your core.

She trails her fingers up your torso, and leans down, her lips hovering above yours.  

"Open up," she commands, her voice taking on a deeper cadence that makes you immediately obey. She pushes her fingers inside of your mouth, and your tongue dances around her digits, tasting yourself, a musky flavor that leaves you feeling lightheaded. She hums and removes her fingers, a trail of saliva connecting her digits to your mouth.

"Good." she whispers, her breath tickling your cheek.

Your eyes flutter shut, and your head spins. You're exhausted, and you almost feel as if you're about to pass out, but her praise and proximity sends a thrill through you, your heart fluttering at her words. She presses another soft kiss to your lips, allowing you to taste yourself on her tongue. She pulls away, a lazy smile on her face. 

Through your exhaustion, you manage to meet her gaze again, and you nearly gasp. Her pupils had swollen, the dark brown of her eyes merely a slim ring around a black void, devoid of any color. You swallow hard, a slight panic rising within you as you suddenly remembering the reality of the predicament you're in. Or, was it even reality? 

"W—what's happening?" you stutter, the words tumbling from your mouth.

She grins, and you realize for the first time that her teeth are razor sharp, looking as if they could tear your flesh to shreds.

"I'm taking care of you, that's what's happening, silly." she says, her voice taking on a sing-songy quality. Her hand trails down your side. "And I'm not quite finished, yet."

She leans down and captures your lips in another kiss so rough that it nearly bruises. You're still dizzy, the blood pumping through your veins, and your head still feels as if it's full of cotton. As soon as her hands meet your skin, your exhaustion and worry disappear, replaced by euphoria. She reaches under your shirt, her fingers dancing along your torso, and you moan, your mind foggy. You can't help the small sounds that escape from your lips as she touches you, her fingers tracing every curve, every angle, committing every inch of your body to memory. Soon, your top is tossed to the side, and her hands are exploring your bare skin. Her fingers run up your spine, and you shiver, goosebumps forming. She pulls away, and a whine falls from your lips, a sound that causes her to laugh.

"So easy to please," she teases.

"Sh-shut up," you protest weakly. 

Suddenly, she grabs you by the waist, pulling you into her lap with an ease that catches you off guard. You're stunned into silence, and she wraps her arms around you, enveloping you in a tight embrace. You let out a yelp, and her nails dig into your skin, the sting making you bite back a groan. She places her chin on top of your shoulder, and her hands move lower, settling on your hips. She squeezes and forces your hips into a grind, her thigh meeting the apex of your legs. Your eyes flutter shut, a wave of heat pooling between your legs, a warmth filling the pit of your stomach, a small moan escaping your lips. She chuckles, her breath tickling the back of your neck.

"Fuck," you choke out, the embarrassment clear in your tone as you continue to your center against the smooth skin of her thigh.

"You're funny," she murmurs with a smile, and presses a kiss on your cheek. 

A blush creeps onto your cheeks, and you hide your face, burying it into her neck. You inhale deeply, her scent filling your nose. She still smells so sweet, like dessert, and you want to lick her, devour her, but instead, you press your lips to her skin, and she moans, gripping your hips hard enough to leave a mark.

"God, you're so beautiful," she whispers, her nails digging into your hips. "So, so pretty."

You moan, the heat between your legs intensifying. Her words go straight to your core, and you can't help the small, high-pitched whine that leaves your mouth, a sound you'd be ashamed of if not for the fact that you can't think, can't focus, can't even process her words.

One of her hands slips around your waist, grabbing at the bare flesh of your ass. Your breath hitches, and she pulls you closer, her mouth finding the spot on your neck that drives you wild. Her teeth scrape against your skin, and her tongue laps at the hollow of your collarbone, the sensation eliciting a loud moan. You tilt your head, allowing her access, and her mouth moves downward, to your breast, her tongue circling one of your nipples. Your eyes squeeze shut, the tension in your abdomen mounting. It was overstimulating, her thighs, the way her tongue felt against you, the way her fingers squeezed at the flesh of your ass, the way her hands explored the planes of your body, and it was all too much. 

"I'm gonna—" you start, and her hand moves between your legs, pressing her fingers against your throbbing clit. 

You let out a cry, the orgasm hitting you hard, the intensity somehow stronger than before. Her fingers slide easily against you, and you clench around her, the waves of pleasure washing over your body.

She lets out a soft sigh, and she pulls away, her black eyes meeting yours. You don't care enough to feel frightened this time though, being so flooded with exhaustion that you collapse back onto the bed, barely able to keep your eyes open. Sharp, short breaths escape from your lips, and a numbness starts to spread throughout your limbs, a strange calm settling over your body that you've never felt before. Somewhere in the back of your brain, alarm bells are going off, but they're drowned out by a heavy sleepiness that takes over you. 

"Go back to sleep, Y/N." she says, her voice distant, muffled. "It's alright."

You can feel the weight of the world bearing down on your shoulders, and the bags under your eyes seem to grow heavier and darker with every passing second. It has been a very long time since you were last able to sleep properly. You wanted to talk to Bada more, but you can feel yourself beginning to lose control, your mind going blank and your muscles becoming weak. 

"Bada..." you mumble, her name rolling off your tongue.

Before you can further speak, the darkness seeps into your mind, and you allow yourself to succumb. But, the feeling that accompanies you into sleep is an uneasy one, a cold sensation wrapping itself around your body like a snake squeezing the life out of its prey. 

"Good night," Bada whispers, the words echoing in the darkness, the sound fading into nothingness. 

#bada lee #bada lee fanfic #bada lee x reader #bada lee x y/n #swf2 #street woman fighter 2 #bada lee imagine #bada lee smut

[hansluvs]

Your debut into the ton was certainly an anti-climactic one. Being the youngest of your five sisters, who had all been whisked away and married by the time you were of-age, everyone's attention had already moved on from your family's matches and preyed on the newer debutantes that had come in from further districts.

However, a debut that had certainly shocked the ton was that of the oldest Itoshi brother, who was the son of the King's advisor and had been close friends with the crown prince along with his brother since they were children. The entire society had been waiting for him to pursue a marriage match since his younger brother, Rin, had tied the knot with a very fortunate debutante the previous season.

Itoshi Sae had the reputation of being quite the rake, and was notorious for never taking the same woman to bed twice. He was very easily bored, as he put it, always looking for a new source of entertainment. Which consequently swiped marriage right off the table, as words from the mamas claim he's never so much as considered it.

Yet there he is now, standing beside his mother and younger brother, nursing a glass of lemonade. His teal eyes are carefully flitting around the room, seemingly cold and calculated. You hoped they would not meet yours.

As much as the alluring man across you had piqued your interest, you were determined to achieve your one and only goal for this season: to find a love match, and ultimately decided that Itoshi Sae was certainly not the man for the job.

A gentle hand had rested on your shoulder and you turn around to find Mikage Reo, the only son of the Viscount Mikage, and your dearest friend.

"Nervous?" he asked, a cheeky grin on his charming face usually reserved for poking fun at you.

"Hardly. I find it's quite boring, you promised me more fun than this," huffing out a sigh, you take another sip from your lemonade. 

Reo lets out an amused chuckle, his eyes crinkling at the corners in the way you've always admired. You've harbored an unrequited crush on him for quite some time now, ever since their family had moved in across the street from yours and he had introduced himself with that same toothy grin he now flashed at you.

"It is uncharacteristically dull tonight, I suppose. Would you fancy a dance instead?"

Reo would have been the perfect match for you; attractive, intelligent, humorous, and not to mention from one of the most well-off families in town. You two got along well, and it was no question your shared affection for one another.

"And risk Seishiro shooting another rude remark at me? Thank you, but I'll pass."

If only he had not been in love with your older brother, Seishiro - who had returned his feelings, which you only found out this summer. Reo shoots you a scolding look, as if to warn you about someone overhearing your conversation. It was, after all, inappropriate for two men to be involved romantically within the ton.

Which was why your brother was standing a few feet away from the pair of you, a bored expression on his face as he pretended to listen to whatever Mr. Bachira was talking excitedly to him about.

Reo hurriedly scribbles down his name into your dance card then gently pulls you onto the large ballroom floor. "Don't worry about him, he's not the one making their debut. Besides, someone needs to dance with you in order to gain the attention of other suitors."

As the orchestra plays another lively tune, you scoff at your friend. "I don't need you to attract suitors! I can do that perfectly by myself, thank you very much."

"Really?" Reo smiles, lilac eyes not pointed at you but at somewhere, someone in the crowd instead. "So, do you reckon that Mr. Itoshi Sae would have noticed you had I not intervened?"

"What are you on about?"

As the pair of you turn, you finally see what Reo had meant.

Itoshi Sae, with his piercing teal eyes and indifferent expression, had been watching you move across the dance floor the entire time. Like a hawk.

The two of you meet each other's gaze and a shudder runs through you as Reo twirls you away from him. A sudden, awful feeling sinks into the pit of your stomach, and it seems that you were entirely incorrect.

This season would be far from boring, as you'd come to find out.

#first time writing for sae pls be nice #this will get a proper post once i make up my mind to actually continue it KDKJSJKBSFJ #big shoutout to my friend who suggested i write a bridgerton au #been obsessed w it and cannot wait for part 2 #anw this pls enjoy this fruit of very very very hard labor (i had to squeeze my brain like a sponge and force myself to write this) #but do you know (you’re demolishing me) #itoshi sae x reader #blue lock #bllk #itoshi sae #mikage reo #nagi seishiro #reonagi #sae x reader

[annwrites]

Going to 100% finish my Billy Thoroughfare series first, but now I have a rockstar!billy au in my head, where reader goes to one of his concerts, only bc her best friend got her a ticket so she wouldn't have to go alone, as well as backstage passes, & when they go back there, reader just stands off to the side & Billy is all:

"You want an autograph, sweetheart?"

"No, thank you."

"What, you don't like my music? Don't tell me you're an Air Supply girl."

"I didn't say that."

"You're not sayin' much of anything. Come all this way and you didn't even enjoy the show? I gotta make it up to you somehow." He winks.

She's just kind of quiet, not wanting to argue. So he comes over & ofc acts the male chauvinist: "Quiet, that's alright. I like that in a woman." Then, "Out of pictures, but I can sign somethin' else, if that's more your speed."

"That's really generous, but I'm not interested."

He can tell he's getting under her skin & is just enjoying every second of it. Then, "Alright. I'll get off your case. When you give me your number. Probably not every day you have the lead singer of a rock band that sold out Chicago Stadium asking for that, huh?"

She rolls her eyes.

He ofc wants it on his hand as an excuse to have her touch him.

Once she's finished writing it, he looks to her friend over his shoulder, who clearly has the hots for him, & he goes: "You two live together in an apartment, or somethin'?"

She's giddy that he's simply talking to her: "Yes!"

"You got a landline, then? What's the number?"

She gives it to him.

Then, "Looks like you gave me a bogus number, sugar. Guess we need to turn that zero into a six."

She just gives her friend a death-glare.

He calls her occasionally, eventually leaves her tickets for one of his shows, even pays her airfare, cabfare, lodging, etc just to see her.

It's the middle of the 80s, so there'd ofc be drugs and other sleezy rockstars, lots of good music, parties, etc.

Like, among one of the first times he calls, he could be all:

"We're playing at Madison Square Garden soon. I could leave you a ticket at the gate. Front row seat. What'd'ya think?"

"I think I could never afford to get there."

"Then I pay your way there, doll. The plane, cabs," she can hear the smirk in his voice. "You won't have to worry about lodgings. You can come stay in my suite with me. Penthouse. You know how many girls would kill for an opportunity like this?"

"I do. I'm just not one of them."

A beat of silence. "You know... You're starting to hurt my feelings."

She sighs, getting annoyed.

"I really want to see you again. Just...let me make that happen, baby."

Idk, what do ya'll think?

#ann talks to herself #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove imagine

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

Currently Watching - June

aka The Masterlist

Because I love a good little list - in alphabetical order! 😊

Regularly updated during the month, latest update 02.06.2024

A little link to my favorite bl-tropes-collection 💙

gif-requests are currently closed🌼

Here you can find all of my gifs.

At the end you can have a look at what we can expect in April with a MDL link and a link for a trailer (if avaible).

This is guaranteed to contain spoilers!

1. 25 Ju, Akasaka de 🇯🇵 (7/10)

I really enjoyed this episode. It didn't feel like a filler. I loved to see some of Hayama's thoughts and emotions. He liked Shirasaki since forever and I really hope they can find their way back together. The pain is so bittersweet. They like each other, but because of walls and misunderstandings they can't live their feelings. Really good episode this week!

2. Cityboy_Log 🇰🇷 (16/?)

I am so confused right now. Sometimes these time jumps are confusing. But okay. Those two made up. And only Jihan apologised? I hate jealousy, extreme jealousy, but I think he didn't need to apologise... I think Jaejun should apologise too, at least for his flirty behavior and this fucking kiss. I still need time to love this again and I hope this story is not going to be more fucked up with cheating and stuff...

3. My Stand-In 🇹🇭 (6/12)

The only thing I can say about the last episode is: I am obsessed with this kiss... There is nothing more in my head. Brain empty. This series is becoming more and more interesting. I am emotional invested now!

4. Only Boo 🇹🇭 (8/12)

Oh Moo. Why are you so stubborn? I get him. He doesn't want to lie and he is proud of his boyfriend, but even though his friends and his mother are okay with his relationship with Kang, that doesn't mean others will be okay too. Which is so sad. Idols, actors, artists or people of public interest should be allowed to date and to have relationships and should be allowed to be people! This episode made me feel all fluffy and incredibly sad. And I saw so much foreshadowing in today's episode. The empty letter...

5. Wandee Goodday 🇹🇭 (5/12)

Both are little idiots. Idiots I love and adore. Their chemistry is so good. The tension and suppressed longing! Chef's kiss. They are both confused with their feelings for each other building up slowly. I think Dee has made up his mind already and knows there is more, even though he don't want to admit it and Yak is drawn to Dee like the moth to the light and tries to break those moments where he feels the longing for a real partnership with bringing up his crush on Taem. This whole dealing with crushes and developing something new, something different is so well done here! I really enjoy every episode.

6. Word of Honor 🇨🇳 (20/36)

Those two flirt a lot and are a married couple. Everyone knows that. And I love and enjoy that! Overall this is such a fun watch and the different sects and intrigues are sometimes a little bit confusing, but interesting. I love this world of martial arts and I love how protective Wen Kexing is over Zhou Zishu. I haven't felt like watching this lately. I wasn't in the right mood.

Finished in June

Series

Short Film

Movie

Double Mints 🇯🇵

Can I say I am a little bit disappointed? Don't get me wrong. This is a good movie, but it is always depicted as this fucked up, dark movie you should be warned to watch and named in one breath with Dangerous Dr*gs of S*x or The Shortest Distance Is Round. And yes, it is brutal and dark and their relationship is interesting but kind of messed up, but it did not meet my expectations. Nevertheless I really liked it and from all those dark movies and series I watched so far, this is one of the better ones. I really like the devotion and enjoyed watching the D/s relationship. The ending was very much fitting for this kind of movie and kind of romantic. Yes, this sounds fucked up, but I guess both of them were very much on the edge and this is the only solution for them to be together forever and become one again. They found each other and that is all they needed. Guess I liked this movie more than I first thought. So for me it gets a good 8,5 out of 10.

Dropped in June

Looking forward to in June

My Love Mix-Up - Trailer (June 7th)

Love Sea - Trailer (June 9th)

Aki wa Haru to Gohan wo Tabetai 2 Haime! (June 14th in cinemas)

SunsetxVibes - Pilot (June 15th)

The Rebound (June 26th)

Blue Boys Part 2 (some time in June)

Born to be Y - Teaser (allegedly in June)

#currently watching #josi watching bl #masterlist #bl series #bl drama #monthly overview #cityboy_log #word of honor #only boo! #25 ji akasaka de #at 25:00 in akasaka #my stand in #wandee goodday #bls in june #Double Mints

[hellbubu]

If you don’t like what I post, filter tags and block me. I’m not gonna argue with anyone.

Can the others hear him or are they just roleplaying? Knowing the kids who go to this school, this conversation would fly over their heads rn.

The SebaCiels are always winning. As they should.

Did they all just stand there and watch them??? Like, por lo menos disimulen.

I just noticed that they all wear glasses (except Ciel). Is it like a requirement to enter the blue house?

Also, imagine if Bluewer just walked in while they're talking. Like hearing "Master Michaelis" call Ciel "young master" or Ciel acting in a way Bluewer wasn't used to him acting.

Damn, that mother fucker really is Undertaker. I can only imagine how much his head must hurt. Maybe it's just me, but if I needed to hide my hair in a top hat or smth, the bun would have to be tight as fuck and I have way less hair than Undertaker. Maybe he has thin hair and he doesn't need to make the bun all that tight.

No one knows the way to Ciel's heart like Sebastian

He's a tiny, little, cute baby

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the Blue House supposed to be the smart one?? What makes him think no one will notice it's a new uniform? How will he even explain this? Were there sugar daddies back in the Victorian Era? I think Sebastian might be the first sugar daddy in the world.

Did they make Ciel the cox so he wouldn't have to row? Did they think "this baby is the only reason we won, he probably doesn't have the strength to do much rn"

Why does one of the Charles have a hen?? Is this something from another season that I forgot about? Is this from the manga? Like, does this have an explanation in the manga but it wasn't in the anime? Is he just guarding the chicken that the Queen will eat tomorrow?

I hope they know how to swim. If I tried to stand on a boat I'd fall into the water.

I can't stop laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 fucking idiots🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Are you serious??? In front of the fucking Queen????

One, Soma is so sweet. Two, like, I'm not a manga reader, but Ciel is a twin correct? And he has asthma while his twin doesn't, right? Like that might be wrong, but judging by the sad tiktok edits I've seen, O! Ciel was at the very least a sickly child. So, wouldn't him falling get him sick, therefore the Midfords thinking "hey, he didn't get sick this easily back before that day" or did Ciel/Madame Red tell them that because of the conditions of where he was kept, he is likelier to get sick a lot more easy? I don't think it's that, because even Sebastian wasn't aware of Ciel's asthma back in the Circus arc.

Violet, my beloved <3

Also, how come Bluewer's glasses didn't fall off when he fell?

One, didn't Lau and his girls get kicked out? Did he bribe his way in again or did he get them to wear long skirts/pants? Two, Ciel is being dragged around by all his friends <3 Three, get fucking Druitt out of my fucking screen

Do manga readers know what's up with the hen??? I need answers

Are they holding the tea party in a fucking cathedral?? Where's the tea? Where's the food? This is lame as fuck.

I'm on edge. The like vice headmaster or whatever hasn't fallen yet, This feels wrong.

I might be wrong, but I doubt it's a tradition to fall off your boat in front of the Queen.

Damn, Ciel learned the rules like he was about to take the bar exam.

Talk about Bluewer, Redmond, or Greenhill, but leave Violet alone. I support Violet's wrongs. He's allowed to do anything. I gave him permission.

Ciel really is a master manipulator. He is trying to get them to do what he wants because the families told him they are worried and that made him worry about these boys he doesn't know.

I love how the P4 are not even trying to act normal. What are they thinking? "No way they're here. I made sure they were extra extra dead!!"

Shouldn't he be wearing the purple tie? Like he got transferred to the purple house.

Also, kudos to Undertaker for managing to Improve his bizarre dolls in such a short time. I mean, this dude got killed before Easter, right? Like, the Queen tells Ciel she worries because he didn't come home for easter. That means he died before April 21st, 1889. That's like 44 days (if we start counting on April 21st) where the body was preserved so well it could be passes as still living. Very Impressive.

#mj's dumbassercy #black butler #kuroshitsuji #o!ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #edgar redmond #sebaciel #bubu watches: bb public school arc #ciel phantomhive #p4 #viscount of druitt #vincent phantomhive #Joanne Harcourt #edward midford #cheslock #Lawrence Bluewer #Gregory Violet #ciel phamtonhive #undertaker

[melanieph321]

Ruben Dias x Reader - Fix You Part 2/10

Part 3 and 4 are out on my Patreon for Free!

Summary - Reader is hired as Ruben's assistant nurse after receiving head trauma during a football game. He has fallen into a deep depression on his road to recovery and does not accept much help from Reader as she only reminds him of how incapable he is.

Enjoy!

Ruben's family were not joking when they said that if successful, you'd be hired immediately. You still had your flat in London with all of your belongings, however, that would be taken care of for you since Ruben's family were more than willing to set up a room for you in Ruben's apartment. There you received your own private quarters, with a joint bathroom and everything, not to mention your own walk-in closet.

"I kid you not, it's bigger than my old flat." You squealed into your phone.

"Well, what is he like, your employer?" Your friend Donna asked. She was currently in your apartment in London, collecting the immediate essentials that had to be shipped to you right away.

"Well, you know. He's kind of quiet." You said, having only known Ruben for two days. During these two days his physio, Max, had taken care of everything, only asking you to measure the proper proportion for Ruben's daily dose of Heparin, which was injected to prevent blood clots from forming.

"But he's hot, no?"

"Who, Max?"

"No, the guy you're working for, Ruben?"

"I don't know?" You muttered. Although he was tall and fairly built, there was something about not knowing the color of a man's eyes that didn't sit right with you. "It's the mirror to one's soul, you know."

"I'd rather wanna know the size of his...."

"Donna." You hissed. "Really?"

Her laughter buzzed in your ear. "What, it's the canal of life, you know."

"Ha, ha, very fun..."

"Y/N?"

A knock on the door interrupted you.

"Just a second!" You pressed the phone to your ear as you jumped down from your bed.

"It's Max." 

"Yeah, just a second!"

You said goodbye to Donna and hurried up to close the suitcase that lay open on your floor. You shoved it under the bed along with other scattered items, before making your way over to the bedroom door. Max stood waiting for you in the doorway.

"Hey, I just wanted to say that I'm leaving now."

"Oh, okay,  when will you be back?"

"On Monday?"

"What? But that's in three days."

"Exactly." He nodded. "I work four days and get three days off to see my girls."

"You have a family?" You said, quite disappointed by the fact. Max was really handsome for a forty-two year old.

"Anyway, If you need anything I think Ivan is stopping by tomorrow with some groceries, other than that I wrote down everything that needs to be done during the day, along with some light exercises that you can help Ruben do."

"Me, help Ruben?" You frowned. It took you two days to get comfortable living the easy life. You would've never pursued acting if you had known about being a rich man's nurse.

"Like I said," Max smiled. "If you need anything, call Ivan. He lives twenty minutes away from here."

"Alright, okay. " You nodded, accepting the situation. "Have a good weekend."

"You too."

And just like that a man's life was left in your hands. It was an odd feeling. Not scary, just odd. Nevertheless, you plotted yourself in the living room, just in case Ruben needed you he could call for help and you'd hear him. However, hours passed without a word from him. You weren't concerned at first, considering the fact that Ruben knew how to walk on his own. But after some thought, you decided to knock on his door and see if he needed anything.

"Ruben, It's me."

No answer.

"I thought that maybe I could make you a snack? Would you like that?"

Still no answer.

It hit you, what if he was bleeding out? With the trauma to his brain, perhaps he had developed some internal bleeding and now he was laying in bed, dying on your watch.

"Ruben, I'm sorry but I'm going to have to...." You burst into his room. The first thing that hit you was the breeze from the balcony with its door ajar.

"Oh, no."

Only seeing the traces of Ruben on his bed, you could only assume the worst.

"Please don't be dead, please don't be dead."

You rushed out onto the balcony, leaning over the railing, expecting to see a body laying flat on the ground. However, there was nothing, not a trace of human remains.

"You're worse than the others, you know that right?"

You gasped, hearing his low chuckle. Turning your head, you spotted Ruben, shirtless, laying on his back, arms tucked behind his neck as he bathed in the sun.

"You're....you're...."

"Not dead?" He said, raising a brow behind his bandaged eyes.

"I'm sorry, I thought...."

"That a guy with injuries like mine should consider killing himself?"

"Yes and no." 

"Yes and no?" He frowned, "Care to elaborate?"

"Not should consider." You said. "But I believe some people would consider...doing it."

"Well, unfortunately I'm still alive."

"I can see that." You muttered.

Ruben sat up, and to your surprise removed the blindfold from his eyes by tugging it down to rest around his neck. He then reached for the bottle of sunscreen on a stool nearby, applying a drop of it on his nose.

"If you're planning on laying in the sun all day, you should probably apply sunscreen to your entire body."

He stopped the motion of putting on sunscreen, shifting his head your way. "I'm Portuguese, I'm pretty sure I can handle a dose of English sun."

"But can you handle a dose of skin cancer?"

He chuckled, eyelids flickering as he did. He seemed tempted to open them, his eyes. And for a moment that thought struck fear within you.

"Was there something you wanted?"

"Pardon?" You had been distracted. Your eyes falling onto the sight of his abs. They were visible even though he was sitting down. Something worth remembering for your next call with Donna.

"Was there something you wanted?" Ruben repeated, snatching you out of your daze. "I mean Max already gave me my shot and I don't need your help swallowing my pills."

"Right." You said. "I guess I just wanted to check on you."

"To see if I was still alive?" He grinned.

"Right." What an asshole, you thought. "Now that that's confirmed, I'll get started on dinner."

"Don't bother." He said, pulling the bandage to cover his eyes again.

"Why not?"

"Well, my mom left us food that should last us all year."

"Oh, okay."

"She's afraid that you can't cook, you know."

"Well I can."

"Yeah, but not as good as her."

"Right."

You left Ruben's room, embarrassed to have entered in the first place. Who does the guy think he is, speaking to you like some kind of servant? You wondered how long you'd be able to put up with it. Not for long you reckoned.

'

Part 3 and 4 are out on my Patreon for Free!

#fanfiction #football imagine #footballer x reader #ruben dias #footballer imagine #man city #football angst #manchester city #ruben dias x reader #ruben dias imagine

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

medialog april 2k24

ok. sick day catch up part two

watched

monkey man - this was gnarly and fun and dev patel, quite simply the hottest man ever to live, is upsettingly hot in this film, like SO hot oh my fucking god

white room - this was a VERY weird movie that (as per the filmmaker q & a) totally flopped at a film festival and never received distribution... you can kinda see why but i more or less liked it. it's about a weird sheltered repressed dude who accidentally sees the murder of a mysterious pop star and then accidentally befriends and falls in love with the woman who was actually the reclusive songwriter and voice of the act... the filmmaker described it as a "journey through genres" and it was very artistically ambitious in a way that maybe didn't totally work but it had some really good stuff about art/consumption/fame/women (my jam) and it frequently looked gorgeous and also all of the mysterious/reclusive pop singer's songs were big late 80s/early 90s style upbeat synth-bombast numbers with lyrics taken from emily dickinson poems which is soooooo funny and a great idea

alien - this is like die hard in that if i'd seen it ten years ago i would not really have understood the hype but seeing after i had a backwards education in film by watching all of the mcu movies and developing curiosity about the question of why they were bad and ugly in such distinct ways and from there developing a nascent and unsophisticated appreciation of the filmic qualities of film i'm like, wow what an incredibly fucking well made movie!!!!!! some things in particular i liked were (1) no substantive backstory for anyone, no dark secrets except the one that really counted, no traumatic pasts, no explanation for how this world works or why anyone was here except needing a job, just giving us the bare minimum to understand the situation the characters find themselves in and trusting the story to do the rest (2) very good spaceshippy spaceship (another way it's like die hard is lots of great Texture, another thing that the MCU lacks which like many other MCU traits was actually a totally fitting design choice for tech bro billionaire tony stark in iron man but simply did not need to expand to Everything...) (3) sigourney weaver so good! ian holmes also very good (4) lots of suspense through silence which is one of the most lost of lost arts in the realm of big expensive Cool Shit Happens cinema!

roy cohn/jack smith - this was a filmed recording of two monologues performed by ron vawter, a gay actor who died of AIDS, each in the character of another gay man who had AIDS - the notorious roy cohn & the experimental cinema icon jack smith. i don't really have much to say about it but i feel very lucky to have seen it and vawter was incredible - i'm glad also that he happened to come to our attention a few months ago because he played the therapist in sex lies & videotape.

mad max: fury road - ok i kept putting this off because the way people talked about it on the internet frankly emphasized to an off-putting degree the ideas in this movie and did not adequately convey to me personally the most important thing about it which is that it Fucking Owns Lmao Wow. we happened to pause it for some reason like 50 minutes in and i swear to you i would have guessed 15, maybe 20 minutes had passed, that's how much it flies by... the coolest shit ever, i wanted to live there forever! also lottie yellowjackets is one of the wives????

mission: impossible 3 - the worst movie in the entire world. we only revisited this one as part of our ongoing marathon with some friends and we spent the whole time complaining about jj abrams' totally inept camera work... seriously watch this movie and look out for (1) every time an already fast sequence is torn up with a zillion stupid little cuts some of which actively prevent us from seeing something that could have been cool (2) every time we get to a new location and the camera starts aimlessly drifting to the side literally immediately because he's afraid we'll get bored if we sit in a location for one whole second (3) every time 3 people are having a conversation and the camera spends the whole time just purposelessly wafting back and forth side to side for, i cannot emphasize this enough, no reason at all. literally nothing in this, an installment of the Stuff Looking Cool franchise, looks even a little bit cool even one time. people hate on 2 for the male gaze of it all re: thandie newton but her character has more personality and agency than ethan's sexy lamp wife in this. the closest to a redeeming value this movie has is that it really feels like part of the goal was to remind everyone of how even though tom cruise jumped on that couch one time he's actually a very normal american heterosexual man (he passes out at one point and flashes back to his wife in her underwear sdksoeroser it's SO dumb) but because he's tom cruise (a total insane freak) he can't convincingly portray that at all and just comes across as insane and maybe a sociopath. "what about philip seymour hoffman" i'm not going to give abrams credit for knowing PSH was a good actor, that's like saying defending a doctor accused of malpractice by saying he knows that feet generally have toes. be serious. i will give a shout out to simon pegg, who is in this less than i remembered but who comes across as the MVP (across what should be a deep bench of a cast!) of making abrams' horrible comic-book-bro-patter come across as something a human might say, mostly so i can also share my friend's insight when i said that which is that it makes sense pegg is suited to the task given that he cut his teeth largely on movies that are parodies of shitty action movies.

mission: impossible - ghost protocol - a wonderful and perfect treat :) i've gone on at length about this one before and really have nothing left to say but it's so good and so specifically good at all the things 3 sucks ass at... my friend was physically squirming next to me on the couch during the burj khalifa sequence, as is right and proper :)

read

beautiful losers - this is a novel leonard cohen wrote in the 60s that is very weird and experimental and i'll be real with you and say i did not get it. it's about a guy whose wife and best friend he had a weird sexual relationship with are both dead and now he's kind of obsessed with an iroquois saint... i am not sure how to describe it but i guess i would say if you think the music of leonard cohen is too optimistic and insufficiently horny for you maybe you would like this. it is probably the most aggressively sexual book i've ever read but not in an erotic way... it's very like about the nastiness of sex and bodies... which i admire ideologically on a certain level but it's really quite unrelenting with it... occasionally there are snatches of deeply beautiful writing though.

listened

sourpatch, stagger & fade - nick put on the vinyl of this and i was like oh that sounds nice and i wound up listening to it a bit... fuzzy indie rock (i'm not educated enough to parse genres more finely than that) that makes for very pleasant background listening

ariana grande, eternal sunshine - i've never kept up with ariana because i just find her voice kind of annoying and i had never heard a song to challenge that UNTIL we reviewed "we can't be friends" at singles jukebox and ariana teaming up with max martin to do kidz bop body talk era robyn turned out to be everything i wanted from her... unfortunately the rest of the album was incredibly boring lol. love that song tho!

maggie rogers, don't forget me - i don't know that i find this one as interesting as her last album or quite as likable as her first (although that might be me somewhat overrating her first because i love "light on" sooooo much) but she's such a capital-M Musician she's always a pleasure to listen to. "drunk" was an early fave but recently i found myself returning a lot to "the kill"

girl in red, i'm doing it again baby! - girl in red comes a lot when other people are talking about the g*yl*rs as one of the actual queer artists they should support but first of all they actually love her and second of all i listened to this album twice straight through and have let some of the songs play on shuffle since and i could not hum you one single line :/

taylor swift, the tortured poets department - speak of the devil! i mean i've talked about this. i like this album a lot - at this point i'm ready to call it easily her best work except for maybe folklore, and honestly i find it hard to assess folklore out of what a special lockdown treat it felt like at the time. i don't expect a world insistent on calling 1989 pop perfection to eventually agree with me but i think people will mellow out about it in time and forget that it was so divisive on release much as has happened with reputation (an album far worthier of scorn if not without its occasional merits) and at the VERY least i think in like 5 years it will be more or less consensus that it's better than midnights.

the starting line, say it like you mean it - i listened to this album mostly to fact-check claims i was making about emo in the taylor swift piece but then i kept listening to it cuz it was kinda full of bops!

fall out boy, take this to your grave - @voidofcourse recommended this as a stepping stone from the starting line for loud guys offering bops and indeed it too was full of bops!

other

an enemy of the people - i saw this on broadway, yes, 1000% literally just because my boy my king my number one guy jeremy strong was in it. the production was interesting and good if not flawless, and although i think some of the younger cast members got a little lost in the old-fashioned theatrical language (even in a new translation) and could have used some direction towards really pulling out the meaning of individual sentences they were saying, the more seasoned actors all did a great job, including, of course, jeremy strong, who got to be shoved into a pit and have pretend ice thrown at him, i'm so happy for him. also the play was incredible? like as a play? i said as much here after seeing it but basically it's about this doctor who discovers that the town baths that are about to open have a contaminated water supply that is definitely going to result in people getting sick and some of them dying, especially since they are being advertised partly for their health-restoring properties for people who are already not doing well, and he's like, wow, good thing i caught this thanks to the help of science so we can change plans, and then everyone else in town is like, but have you considered that would be expensive? why do you hate poor people? (there's a thread specifically about the editor of the radical leftist newspaper going from being the doctor's number one champion to being totally coopted out of both politics and self-interest that was particularly brutal to watch...) like it was truly SO incredibly specifically relevant to some Extremely Contemporary Issues that i was just agog and also it was incredibly fucking upsetting to watch! really really great playwriting, such a clean example of how a work can best encompass & comment on ideas by developing them through character and dramatic action rooted in wants, needs, choices, conflict, etc., a lesson many people could stand to learn. i kept thinking it had burrowed as deeply into the core issues as it could and then it found another layer. this ibsen guy... he really knew some stuff about stuff....

#media 2k24 #isabel 2k24

[tiana4evahh]

Took me a while to get my thoughts into words, but awhile ago, @swans-chirping-in-the-distance made a post saying that Tam and Marella have gossip sessions, and this is exactly what me and my IRL friend headcanon.

Okay so basically we both headcanon that Tam and Marella do indeed, have gossip sessions.

It starts with Marella sitting down at the table and talking about the newest gossip and stuff... *cue the scene/mini fanfic below tw cringe*

"...so it turns out, she likes Jared-"

"Actually, she doesn't."

Marella whips her head around to see Tam casually eating a sandwich. Her eye twitches.

"Uh, I'm sorry, what?" She says. Tam looks at her.

"What what? Liana doesn't actually like Jared."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN?!" Marella explodes, causing a few tables to look over. "She's been pinning on him for the past three weeks! It's obvious! And he likes her back too!"

Tam snorts, and shakes his head. "It was a dare. Three weeks ago, Liana and her friends were playing a game of Truth or Dare, and one of them, Arenen, dared Liana to pretend to like a random guy, and that guy was Jared."

Marella's jaw was on the floor. "...You're lying. I don't believe you!" He shrugged.

"If you don't believe me, you can look over behind you to see Liana and Arenen talking while pointing to Jared, looks of disgust on there faces."

She turned around, and in fact, Marella did see the two girls, doing exactly as Tam described.

"...No way."

"I also, ah, overhead, them in the hallway... ehh, 30 minutes ago."

Marella couldn't say anything. Liana and Jared? A lie? Fake? But most important, gossip that she HADN'T known about?!

She heard Keefe whistle. "Damn, Bangs Boy, didn't know you were into gossip." Tam just shrugged.

"It's the only thing worth going to this school for. The crazy, drama filled lives of others is free entrainment."

That was exactly what Marella though.

Regaining her voice, she asked Tam a question. "Okay... so, you're right. Oh my custard bursts... This is... Sorry." She swallowed. "If you know this, do you know anything else?"

"Well, I know Jared is gay and in love with Clorax."

"WHAT-"

*cue the end of the mini drabble/scene*

And from that day forward, there was a beautiful friendship was formed. It started during lunch, where Marella and Tam would spend at LEAST 10-15 minutes filling each other in on all the gossip they've collected that day.

Then, it transferred from when Marella was visiting Linh but Linh had to leave, she and Tam would start talking. It was small at first, since neither of them really talked outside of school, but soon enough, they started to get to know each other.

Tam was one of the first few people to have been told from Marella that she's a lesbian (and her feelings for Linh, which Tam totally supported), and Marella was one of the few that Tam was in love with Biana. (Both of them use this information to their advantages/teasing. Like "Tam, if you don't do this for me, I'll have to call Biana~" "SHUT UP I'LL DO IT FINE YOU EVIL B-" and "Linh, there's something MARELLA needs to tell you, and it's that she-" "I THINK THAT YOU LOOK GREAT IN PINK BUT BETTER IN ORANGE")

I have a lot more to say about these two. Like Tam Marella friendship is so valueable to me. I have WAYYY more to say on them which will probs go onto another post, but yeah. <3

TAM AND MARELLA FRIENDSHIP WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

#dang this was a lot #sorry lol #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc tam #kotlc marella #tam song #Marella redek #kotlc headcanons #kotlc headcanon #kotlc fanfic #kinda? I mean a little bit #kotlc tiana #kotlc marelinh #marelinh #tiana #tam x biana #Marella x linh #headcanons #tam and Marella gossip buddies #I need my tam and Marella friendship #kotlc thoughts