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#i love him so much and he's all i ever think about and he makes me smile so much
luveline · 2 days
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Hey Jade!
I can’t remember if you’ve already written this or not but if not, could you please write bombshell!reader finally joining the BAU? I wanna know how Spencer and everyone else reacted to her finally joining
Thanks lovely :) hope you’re doing well
ty for requesting 💌 fem, 1.3k
The trek from the SCU to the BAU is familiar. If you aren’t being asked to consult, or occasionally brought along on sex crime specific cases, you’ll make any excuse to get there. A broken laptop, an updated reading list, a good cup of coffee. Spencer Reid always provides. 
He just doesn’t get it. You think about it every time you see him, but he can’t understand how nice, kind, and pretty he really is, or he wouldn’t be so shy, and he wouldn’t act surprised to have you seeking him out. 
He’s sitting now behind his desk with a hand over his mouth. You can tell he’s smiling despite it, a warm light to his brown eyes as you approach. 
“Hello,” you say. 
“Hi.” He sniffs, curling his hand into a fist under his nose. His smile is a thousand times more obvious as he tries to hide. “You okay?” 
“Hotch asked me to come. You don’t know what it’s for?” 
His smile finally softens before fading to a more neutral expression. “I have no idea.” 
You wipe your hands down over your hips. “Well, I’m sure it’ll be fine, and not at all like last time.” Hotch has never been angry with you before. It was strange. “I hope he still likes me.” 
“What are you talking about? Of course he does.” 
“What am I talking about?” You agree. “Kiss for luck?” 
“Pucker up,” Morgan says, a coffee cup in hand. Without coffee you’re sure this office would cease to function. 
You shoot him a smile, Spencer a promising look to return, and start up the stairs to the office. You watch your shoes on each step, their shiny black, and you try not to be nervous, but Spencer was acting strange and Hotch has enough reason to revisit his anger. 
Your best defence is a smile, you decide. If you act like nothing happened, you won’t get another rehashing of your mistakes. 
You knock his door. “Hotch? It’s me.” 
“Come in, please.” 
You turn the handle and feel the weight of the door against your elbow as you enter. Hotch sits behind his desk, as usual, but when you’re a few paces from the desk he stand up, which is unusual. 
“How are you?” he asks.
Your eyes widen against your will. “I’m fine. How are you, Hotch? How’s your sweet boy? Did he have fun at little league?” 
“Jack’s perfect. I’m good, I need to talk to you about something.” 
“I assumed.” You wait. Then, neck growing warm, “If it’s about last time, I'm still so sorry.” 
“I’m not going to get angry at you twice for a mistake. But no, that’s not what you’re here for.” 
He’s making you nervous. Is this a guessing game? You lean into your nerves and put your arms behind your back, grasping your wrist as you tilt your head ever so slightly to the side. “It’s not about Spencer, is it? I told you, he’s just a friend. A good friend. But I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise my chances.” 
“It’s about that.” 
You stand straighter. “I do like him,” you confess, which Hotch already knows. Everybody seems to know except for Spencer. It’s not like you’re in love with him, just you could be, maybe. “But I’m really not– I would never do anything–” You start again. “I want this job more than anything. I know I flirt and I make more jokes than I should, but I take the work seriously, I promise. You guys are the most impressive people I know and I might feel like you’re a friend to me, Hotch, but you have to know how much I admire you. I admire Spencer, and I’d never let my feelings impede my professional ability.” 
“Y/N, I’m not reprimanding you for anything.” 
You swallow awkwardly. “You’re not?” 
He raises his eyebrows and turns to his desk. There’s a packet waiting across his outgoings, which he picks up and gives to you. “I need you to fill these in, first and foremost.” 
He’s smiling. Why is he smiling? 
You peer inside cautiously. Chest suddenly aching, thinking, It isn’t what you want, don’t break your own heart, you pull out the very top sheet from inside. FBI letterhead greets you. 
Facilitation of department transfer for Y/N L/N from the Sexual Crimes Unit to the Behavioural Analysis Unit, as requested by Unit Chief Supervisory Special Agent A. Hotchner and approved by Unit Chief S. Peterson. 
You lay it on top of the envelope. All the papers whine under your tight hand. “You requested it?” you ask. 
“Months ago.” 
“And Sandy said yes.” 
“Strauss, finally. If you sign them today, Penelope’s promised to expedite your processing, whether that’s fair or not. Your desk is ready.” 
“Hotch,” you whisper, not without excitement, but sound hard to summon, “are you serious? You’re not messing with me?”
“You deserve it. You have for a long time.” 
You squeeze your eyes closed. For five long seconds, you stand there, and you think about how hard you’ve worked and how badly you’ve wanted this, and how much faith everybody’s had in you the whole time. You’re so thankful. For Hotch, Morgan, and especially for Spencer Reid. 
“Don’t get upset,” Hotch says, taking your arm. He gives it a good squeeze. It’s so friendly and kind you consider jumping up to wrap your arms around him, but you restrain yourself. 
“Thank you,” you say quietly, pressing the packet to your chest. 
“You’re welcome. I didn’t mind fighting for you.” 
“I need to go and tell Spencer.” 
“Spencer, your good friend.” 
Your laugh comes in fractures from a sudden deep breath. “My good friend,” you agree. “Hotch, thank you. Thank you, I’m gonna go tell Spencer. I’ll be right back.” 
“It’s fine. Just make sure you finish those forms before lunch.” 
You leave with some dignity. You close Hotch’s office door, and you walk to the balcony and look down at Spencer where he’s waiting for you. His hair falls against his neck, his head angled up, and he’s smiling so hard he must’ve already known what you were summoned into the office for. 
You rush down the stairs. He, in all his loveliness, stands in time to open his arms. “I can’t believe it,” you say, your laugh like a ring as you lean against him. He holds you tight and hugs right back, forcing you to bend under his weight. “Spencer.” 
He pulls away just as quickly. “Tell me,” he says. 
“I’m gonna be part of the BAU.” It’s so insane to finally say aloud. 
Spencer looks extremely, achingly happy for you, but his second hug still surprises you. Your nose ends up pressed to his hair, strands of it falling from behind his ear as his palm cups your shoulder. 
You close your eyes. Spencer laughs, his lips a hair's width from your cheek. 
Your excitement grows too much. You squirm away from him and wrap your hands around yourself, holding in a girlish, giggly squeal. “I did it. I can’t believe I did it.” 
He takes your hand. You barely notice. “Why can’t you believe that? You’re amazing. You work hard and you didn’t give up.” 
Morgan returns from wherever he’s been with Emily and Garcia in tow. “There she is!” he says. 
It’s possibly the best round of hugs you’ve ever had in your life. The little congratulations cupcake they present you with is the sweetest you’ve ever tasted. Spencer puts a makeshift name tag on your desk and you don’t bother pretending your eyes haven’t filled with tears, but nobody cares or minds. 
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hannieehaee · 3 days
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Svt ot13 having to break up with their s/o for the sake of the group and their public image?
having to break up bc of their career (but not really)
content: established relationship, potential break up, public scrutiny, angst (no sad ending though ofc), etc.
wc: 804
a/n: i switched this up a bit to how they'd react to controversy about your relationship since i hate writing unresolved angst or angst with sad endings oops sorry </3
masterlist
seungcheol -
im sawrryyy his ass is far too stubborn to break up a relationship just bc his label wants him to. he also would not care what the tabloids are saying. he'd maybe consider it if it was affecting you, but ultimately he'd rather go on hiatus or just put up with the scrutiny rather than actually break up.
jeonghan -
he'd never admit to a relationship publicly no matter how damning the evidence was. would just completely ignore the subject and throw subtle lies about it. wouldnt even have to consider breaking up with you bc he wouldnt even acknowledge any backlash from your relationship at all lol.
joshua -
kinda odd to write about him considering ... anyways i think he would do the same as hannie and just not acknowledge the damage a relationship would do to his public image. i mean. if he finally found someone who he feels strongly enough about to let into his messy life why would he ever consider ending it? he'd feel affected by it, though, knowing the scrutiny would also fall on you.
jun -
he might bring up the controversy very subtly during a live or maybe one day straight up make a statement about it but never actually let it go further than that. he seems super private with his family, so if your relationship were to begin causing public uproar he'd just tighten the reigns on his privacy a bit more.
soonyoung -
just annoyed and frustrated about it. would try and subtly scold the media (and carats a little bit) about it on one of his private weverse lives. if the situation got too intense, though, he'd just opt for hybe putting out some type of statement denying the relationship in order to protect you from public opinion as much as be could.
wonwoo -
he's so nice and understanding and never blames fans for anything (even though sometimes he 100% should *cough* the mobbings *cough*) so he wouldnt blame anyone for their emotions towards his relationship. would consult with you and give you an out if you felt like you couldnt handle the situation (even though it absolutely broke his heart to even consider breaking up) but when you denied him he'd simply opt for putting up with the negative press and just continue to love you as privately as he could.
jihoon -
only one who gives me the vibes that he might actually try and break up with you just bc he loves you too much to put you through all this unwarranted hate all bc of his public image. butttt would not survive the heartbreak he felt at breaking up with someone he clearly still loved and would run back into your arms within the month.
seokmin -
just complete emotional turmoil. he wouldnt wanna break up, but if you did, he'd do it just for you. he also wouldnt wanna deny your relationship bc he'd feel like that'd be disrespectful to you. anddd he also would not wanna confirm your relationship since that'd just add extra hate to you. he'd opt to do anything you chose, making you his main priority.
mingyu -
his ass would NAWWWTTT care if people thought badly of him being in a relationship. he'd keep it as private as he could, but would never even entertain the thought of breaking up when dispatch suddenly got a hold of your relationship and the situation blew up. very nonchalant about it all, feeling too confident in your love to think anything could ever drive the two of you apart.
minghao -
gives me the vibes that he might just opt for making the usual statement idols always make of 'x idol is seeing x idol with warm feelings' or whatever the fuck they usually write. other than that he would still keep the relationship very on the down low and never allow public opinion to affect his emotions towards you.
seungkwan -
would take a very logical and professional approach to it by immediately denying any relationship and claiming the two of you are friends lol. he's so friendly with everyone it'd be very believable. wouldn't have it in him to break up a personal relationship over his career thoughhhh he's just too full of love to do that.
vernon -
yet another member to just absolutely ignore anything going on and straight up not care for any public reaction about it. wanna send trucks? wanna write articles about him? he's not even gonna see them.
chan -
would feel insanelyyyy bad that he ever put you in the limelight in such a negative light. would also feel embarrassed and annoyed at the fact that merely being with you would become such a scandal. in the end, he'd also just opt to ignoring the situation and denying the relationship in order to preserve your peace.
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cutielando · 3 days
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I just finished reading your chubby reader fic which I loved as a chubby girl myself!! I was wondering if you could do something similar with like a fit gym girlie I feel like muscle mummy’s tend to be forgotten a lot!
a/n: of course! people always overlook a gym mummy!!
my masterlist
warnings: gymrat!reader (reader is described as being muscly and frequenting the gym)
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Lando has always been keen on exercising. He didn’t really have a choice in the matter, seeing as his job required him to be in the best shape possible. 
However, that doesn’t mean that he looks down on people who don’t exercise as regularly as he did or at all. Every person was entitled to their own routine, in his opinion.
But when he met you, someone who lived and breathed exercise and hitting the gym, he felt like he had hit the jackpot. Being in the gym together, sharing your love for exercise with each other and always pushing one another to better themselves.
It was a dream come true, frankly. 
The first time he had suggested joining you for your workout, he figured you would go easy on yourself, do some light exercises and call it a day. The shock on his face when he saw you lifting weights, twice the weight he himself could barely lift, was something out of a movie.
You had found it so endearing, seeing him staring at you with such a perplexed expression and shock, you found it sweet and funny at the same time.
“Why are you looking at me like I’ve suddenly grown 3 heads that I don’t know about?” you joked once you had put the weights back and joined him where he was standing.
“You know you just lifted twice what I can lift, right?” he said, eyes still wide and staring back at you.
You laughed, holding your belly as your laughter rang through the fairly empty gym. This was one of your favorite things about living with Lando, the fact that the apartment building where you both lived had a private gym exclusive only for the residents.
“Babe, you know I’ve been a gym rat for years now. What did you think I’ve been doing all this time?” you asked, cocking an eyebrow.
Lando shrugged, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his pants.
“I don’t know, running on the treadmill? I figured you lifted weights and all that stuff, but I didn’t think you could lift more than me. And I’ve been training straight up hardcore my entire life” he explained, scratching the back of his neck before he reached out for your hand and pulled you closer to him.
You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting yourself melt against his body.
“I can do more than that, but I’m still jet-lagged and my body takes a while to recover, you know” you explained, making the shock return twice as intense.
Lando could swear his brain was malfunctioning. He didn’t know why or how, but the way you were speaking and the things you were saying were doing things to him. He found you so attractive before, but now it had reached a whole other level.
“Have I ever told you how hot you are?’ he asked, his voice having dropped to a dangerous low mumble.
You bit your lip, looking into his eyes sensually. If you had known this was all it took to get to him, you would have brought him with you a very long time ago.
“You have, and I could say the same about you. However, as much as I want to jump your bones this very second in this very gym, I need to finish my workout and you need to work on your neck” you said, your lips brushing against his as you suddenly pull away from him and make your way towards the treadmill for a running session.
Lando stared dumbfounded as you walked away from him like nothing had happened, getting back to your workout just like that.
He would lie if he said he didn’t want to just ditch his workout and take you upstairs, but he knew Jon would be coming soon enough to help him with his neck training and he didn’t want to have to explain to him why he decided to skip it.
♡♡♡♡♡
Ever since that first day in the gym, Lando had insisted on joining you for every workout routine that he had time to attend. It didn’t matter if he had just got back from a race halfway across the globe, or he was tired and sore.
He wanted to be there, even if it was just to watch and admire.
“Baby, you’re tired, you really don’t have to come with me” you argued with him one very early morning as you were getting ready to go downstairs to the gym.
Lando had just got back home very late last night, having flown all the way from China. The amount of sleep he got was nowhere near enough for him to get enough rest after such a busy weekend.
And yet there he was, wide awake before 8 am and ready to go watch you while you work out. 
“But I want to watch you” he pouted, his eyes barely open. His hair was fluffy and his curls were sticking up in every possible direction.
You sighed, knowing you would never be able to say no when he looked at you like that, lips all pouty and those puppy dog eyes staring right into your soul.
“You need to sleep, love. You’ve barely had any time to rest this weekend and when you finally come home you’d rather come and watch me exercise than get some sleep?” you asked, smiling slightly, but you already knew the answer.
“I would rather spend any time with you than sleep. If you’re not here with me then what’s the point of sleeping?” he asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.
You chuckled, shaking your head. He knew how to weasel his way straight into your heart, saying things like that which you couldn’t overlook.
Once he noticed the defeated look on your face, he got up from the bed and took your hand, offering to carry your bag downstairs.
When you arrived downstairs, you were pleased to see that there was nobody in the gym at that hour, giving you two some much needed privacy.
“Alright, I’m going to run on the treadmill for a while and then do some leg lifting. Are you okay here by yourself for a little while?” you asked him once you put your earphones in and your headband on your head.
He nodded, taking a seat on a bench in the middle of the room. The sight all but melted your heart, the way he sat there with his hands on his lap, like a little kid waiting for his mother.
You nodded and leaned in to quickly kiss him on the lips, turning on your music and getting to work.
It wasn’t even 20 minutes after that you got off the treadmill and noticed Lando had fallen asleep on the bench, his head resting on his knee. You pouted, taking out your phone and snapping a quick picture.
Because you knew there was no way he was comfortable in that position, you decided to cut your workout short and get him to bed, figuring you could get some more sleep yourself.
“Lando, baby. Come on, let’s go upstairs” you slowly shook him awake, his eyes opening and meeting yours sleepily.
“Are you done working out?” he asked, stretching a little and looking around, seeing you more rested than you usually were.
“I only ran on the treadmill today, I’m skipping my legs session today so we can catch up on some sleep together” you explained, taking his hand and trying to get him to follow you upstairs.
He protested, shaking his head and not moving an inch.
“No, go on and finish. We can get some sleep later. I don’t want you to jeopardize your routine because of me. I’ll watch, do your thing” he said and planted himself more comfortable on the bench, now facing towards the apparatus he knew you would be using.
You smiled lightly, finding his obsession with watching you train endearing.
Never before in your life had anyone been as supportive of your workouts than Lando has been. Compromising his sleep schedule just to see you train and do your thing, sleeping on a gym bench just so he could watch you in your element.
You couldn’t have asked for a better partner in life, someone just as passionate about the gym as you were.
Maybe even more.
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pierregazly · 3 days
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simply a joke ꨄ lewis hamilton
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lewis hamilton x assistant!reader
warnings: smut, unprotected sex, oral (f!receiving), lewis was pining and reader was oblivious [1.6k words]
request: 🌶 I would request for Lewis Hamilton and [20. “I’m gonna fuck you so good you forget all about that bastard.”]
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The bill was placed down on the table, the waitress giving you a sympathetic look as she openly asked whether it would be cash or card.
“You don’t mind paying right? I’ll forward you the money, just forgot my wallet of course, such a lapse of memory sometimes,” he said, an arrogant smirk on your blind date’s face while he waited for your response.
Humming in acknowledgement, you muttered that it would be on card to the waitress. 
You didn’t give him much of a chance to say anything further, bidding him a farewell the moment the bill was paid, and a denial to a second date. The shock on his face made your smile grow when you whirled around, making the trek towards your car while you contemplated how your life had even got to this point.
A quick text sent off to the only person you actually wanted to see was met with an easy ‘I’ll leave the door unlocked, see you soon’, prompting you to direct your car in the opposite direction of your own home.
Lewis was always happy to have you over, saying more than once you may as well just move in with him with how often you were there anyways. Always shrugging the comment off, you would just laugh and remind him the two of you see each other enough during the week and that you were pretty sure Mercedes would be unhappy with a driver and his team-assigned assistant living together.
“I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what they would want, actually? Full access for both of us, love,” Lewis practically had the response memorized, a shove to his shoulder the only answer he ever received to it.
Huffing as you flopped down on the couch next to the Brit, Lewis quirked a questioning eyebrow at you, silently imploring as to what could possibly be creating your current set of emotions.
“I’ve just come back from a date, what an absolute nightmare, Lew. I’ve never met someone who managed to talk about themselves more than that guy. Don’t think I even got a word in,” you complained.
A small chuckle fell from Lewis’ lips, his hand gently patting your knee with a sympathetic expression falling across his face.
“Like… am I the problem, Lew? Be honest, because I’m going insane here, I don’t think I’ve even had sex in months. I genuinely think I’m on the verge of insanity,” you said, practically begging for a response from the Brit.
Huffing, Lewis turned his gaze onto you. Looking you up and down, you felt yourself heat under his gaze. You would never admit it aloud, but you couldn’t deny that the Mercedes driver was borderline gorgeous. 
“I think if all you’re looking for is sex, going on a date in the outfit you’re wearing right now… well it’s not doing you any favours, really.”
Pouting at him, you looked down at your outfit while trying to decipher what was wrong with it.
He continued, “before you start, there’s nothing wrong with the outfit. You look gorgeous, really. But you’ve got the buttons up all the way to the top, the pants aren’t formfitting at all, and you’ve got incredible legs, you just refuse to wear shoes that accentuate them. You’re dressed like you’re going to a business meeting, not like you’re going on a date with the intention of being taken home after.”
He emphasized his words by coming closer, flicking open the top four buttons, allowing the top of your breasts to peak through, the lacy bra you were wearing visible to the open-eye. 
“You don’t get it, Lew. Sure, I could wear a shirt that shows off my breasts, pants that accentuate my ass… but I don’t just want sex. Sure, yes, I want sex… but I want to be taken seriously, I want to be taken on a real date and actually enjoy myself.”
“I could give you both, but you keep denying my offer,” he shrugged his shoulders, turning his attention back towards the television.
Trying to wrap your mind around his words, “You act like your offer is ever serious, Lew. We both know it’s a joke.”
“You’re the one who says it’s a joke and that I’m not being serious. Not sure what else I’m really meant to say that’s going to make you believe me, love,” he said.
You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. He had been making jokes like this for years. It was easy to assume they were comments he made with everyone, his personality naturally flirtatious.
Your body moved on instinct, pressing yourself closer to him as you contemplated your next words.
“Can I kiss you, then?”
He didn’t give a response before he was pressing his lips to yours, his hand instantly pressing to the back of your neck, tugging you closer to his body. His lips were soft, his tongue wet as it pressed gently at your lips, begging for an entrance. 
A soft moan fell from your mouth when Lewis pulled your body on top of his, your legs encircling his waist. You ground your core against his, a rumble of a groan falling from Lewis’ own lips, his head falling back against the couch behind him.
“God, baby. I’m gonna fuck you so good you forget all about that bastard, about fucking all of them, I swear.”
The whimper that fell from your lips was unintentional, your body subconsciously grinding down against the hardness growing between his legs; the pit in your stomach growing, the desire for him so prevalent in your actions.
You had never realized how much you truly wanted this, how much you wanted those comments you thought to be jokes, to be real.
“That better not be a joke, Lew,” you moaned, his lips pressing to your neck as he guided your hips back and forth over his lap. 
You felt your back hit the couch, Lewis’ body crawling over top of yours as he began kissing down your body. The buttons on your shirt having come undone at some point making it easier for the Brit to continue his ministrations across your skin.
Looking up at you imploringly, his tattoo-covered hand tugged gently at the waistband of your pants, a silent question in his eyes. You nodded eagerly, lifting your hips slightly so he could tug the offending material off.
He lightly nipped at your hip, pressing a kiss to sooth the heated skin before continuing his actions to the other side. Small love bites, kisses, short presses of his tongue to your skin as he continued to move down your body. Lifting a leg to press a gentle kiss to the inside of your thigh, you moaned at the action.
It didn’t take long for your panties to join the discarded pants, his eyes hungrily taking in the display. You couldn’t help the self-conscious thoughts, your legs instinctively closing around his body. 
“Nuh-uh, none of that, pretty girl,” he said, his hands pushing your legs open.
A finger gently pressed to your core, parting your lips as he ran a finger through them, collecting the wetness that was seeping from you. A tiny whimper departed your lips as you watched Lewis bring the finger to his mouth, sucking the collected juices from the digit.
It was like watching a man possessed as he got in between your legs, your hands finding their way to his head as the first press of his tongue resonated throughout your body.
There was no surprise that he was skilled with his tongue, the same way he was skilled with his fingers; the same way he was skilled when he put his mind to anything else he desired success in.
His fingers moved in tandem with his tongue, pressing against the spot inside your core that had you practically keening for him, your hips pressing up against his face; the only thing keeping his mouth from drowning in your wetness was the hand he had pressed to your pelvis, pushing you back down against the bed.
A loud moan fell from your lips as Lewis sucked at your clit, a third finger joining the other two inside you, a squelching sound vibrating throughout the living space as you felt yourself hit your peak.
Your orgasm crashed through you, your legs shaking as Lewis’ fingers and tongue slowed down, allowing you to ride out your orgasm. Your head was still thrown back when you heard the sound of more clothes hitting the floor, your eyes peaking open to a view that had your mouth practically watering.
It was common knowledge that Lewis was an incredible sight. From his hardened muscles, to the pops of ink that covered his body, everyone knew he was gorgeous. But his cock? All you wanted to do was wrap your lips around it, which in time, you knew you’d be able to.
But for now? All Lewis wanted to do was press inside you, feel the way your walls pulled him in, the way your wetness coated him, the way you’d stretch so lovely around him.
“On your knees, pretty girl. I wanna’ see this lovely arse when I push inside you for the first time, been thinking about it lots.”
You were quick to do as he demanded, flipping your body over so you were on your knees, resting on your elbows as you felt the couch dip behind you.
A low whimper fell from your lips as you felt him run his length through your wetness, coating his cock in your juices before pressing the tip inside. The stretch was delicious, your body pushing back against his, begging for more.
Obliging, his entire length pushed forward, your lips wrapping around him, the wetness dripping from your core making it easier for him to slide inside.
“Gonna fuck you so good, make you never wanna leave, baby. Can’t wait to feel you cum all over my cock, been wanting to feel that for ages,” he whispered in your ear, biting at the lobe as he pulled away.
Moans and grunts fell from your lips with every thrust of his hips, his body seeking the release he knew yours could give him. The way he made you feel, the feelings his body evoked from yours; it made you insatiable, made you crave the feeling more and more. Made you regret ever believing his comments were simply a joke.
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anyways. i got carried away. please enjoy (reader has a hand kink specifically for lewis as i also do sorry!!! bye!!!)
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purple-babygirl · 1 day
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yours to hurt, yours to love
Pairing: (dom)!Bucky Barnes x (sub)!f!reader
Word count: 8,050
Summary: They had a deal. She would surrender her control; he would take it. Love had no place in such a relationship, did it?
Warnings: 18+ Content: friends with benefits, blowjobs, lots of cum, cum eating, cum in pussy, unprotected vaginal intercourse (don't do that), mentions of cheating, angst, crying, dom x sub dynamics including a sir kink and the use of puppy as a petname, BDSM features including begging, following orders/instructions, mentions of ropes, being tied/suspended, mentions of edging and overstimulation and the use of toys, ass whipping with a belt, mention and use of a safeword, chocking, two insecure idiots being in love, metal arm kink, fingering, rubbing of cock on pussy, multiple orgasms, aftercare. Let me know if I missed anything.
A/N: this is a self-indulgent fic I wrote simply because I wanted to read and now it's finally done so I'm sharing it with you, babies:"💜💜 I just started at a new job and it's very tiring and energy and time consuming so I thought I'd post something before I get swept up in the real world of numbers and targets and not being broke. I really hope you like this one and I love you all with every bit of me💜
~
As most one-night stands start, they had met at a bar.
She was sitting all alone with her palm hugging a beer bottle, her face carrying the saddest look. She had turned down every guy that had tried to approach her that evening.
Bucky had been watching her all night, lost in deep thought as she barely raised the warming bottle to her lips, the melancholic look marring her features never leaving.
She had only smiled once that night, and it was for Bucky.
She was snapped out of thought when a louder song abruptly came on, startling her back to reality and that was when she saw him.
The most handsome man she had ever laid eyes on had his eyes on her from the other side of the crowded nightclub, and she found herself smiling at him.
He quickly turned his gaze away, suddenly shy that he was staring.
She wanted to ignore the man, telling herself she had a lot on her plate already, that it would likely be a mistake to go talk to him; that she needed to keep her distance from men for a while at least. But she couldn’t. She couldn’t ignore him.
Even with his back to her, his presence was too strong to simply be ignored.
So she disregarded her minds’ screams and went to talk to him.
Bucky almost chocked on his drink when he saw that it was her who had approached him, but he managed to compose himself.
“Were you ever planning on talking to me?” She teased with a smile as she sat down next to him at the bar.
And just like that, they were talking.
They talked about anything and everything, the deepest things as well as the silliest.
She was so easy to be around and she actually made the man laugh.
She had no idea, but Bucky didn’t think he had even cracked a smile in weeks.
Before she could decide what was right and what wasn’t, she had her lips on his, and before he could overthink it, Bucky was taking her back to his place.
It has been a long time since the man had had the chance to like someone, and he liked her even more when she didn’t make him feel bad about himself that night.
The metal arm didn’t faze her.
She didn’t ask intrusive questions or even let her gaze linger. She treated it just like his other arm, wrapping both around her back as she straddled Bucky on his couch, making out with him like she has been waiting for him her whole life.
But that wasn’t the only reason Bucky appreciated her so much that night.
She had gotten on her knees for him, both of them fully naked at that point, her boobs swaying lightly as her hand pumped his hard cock, lubing him up with his pre-cum.
Her hands were magic and he didn’t want to tell her that he was too close to exploding just from her soft hand palming his tip.
She had barely gotten Bucky in her mouth when he had started cumming all over her.
The sight of his fists clutching the couch, mouth open as groans left his chest while copious amounts of cum covered her mouth, chin, neck and boobs had her wetness dripping down her bare thighs.
When he was back on earth again and his vision was no longer black, Bucky started apologizing profusely when he realized what had happened.
He had come way too fast. All over her. Without her getting to finish even once. He didn’t even get to touch her down there.
Bucky thought she was definitely going to leave.
“It’s okay,” she said with a kind smile as her clean hand caressed up and down one of his thighs, “I don’t mind.”
And before Bucky could explain that it has been a long time for him, she was collecting his cum off her skin with her fingers and slipping them into her mouth, maintaining eye contact with the man and almost giving his old heart an attack.
Bucky stared with parted lips, cock already hardening again, as she shut her eyes and moaned over the taste of him.
She had managed to eat every bit of cum that had gotten on her face and neck before Bucky unfroze and lost it.
He grabbed his shirt and hastily wiped her chest clean of his cum before eagerly carrying her to his bed.
He thought her surprised giggle as she called him a “caveman” had to be the sweetest sound he had ever heard until he pushed his cock in her and her wail of his name echoed throughout the quiet bedroom.
Bucky was hooked on the sight of her, the taste of her, the smell of her, and the feel of her.
Her walls were hugging his cock so tight that he thought he wouldn’t be able to get the rest of it inside. Her hands were scratching at his back as she tried to adjust to his size with a silent scream on her face.
“Relax,” Bucky had told her softly.
It was a simple word, but it was the most exhilarating thing when she had immediately listened, her pussy muscles relaxing for him at once, thighs spreading wider to accommodate him better.
Bucky was amazed by her ability to listen to instructions; it awakened an unmatched feeling inside of him.
Once he was buried to the hilt inside of her, Bucky wanted to see what else he could make her do; how much she might obey, so he stayed still.
“I’m ready, you can move.” She had nodded to him, thinking he was waiting on her.
But that wasn’t why Bucky wasn’t moving. He knew she was ready, her juices were ruining his sheets for heaven’s sake.
“I mean, if you ask nicely enough…”
He was just giving it a try, and if she didn’t go along with it he would still give her what she wanted—
“Please,” she begged, eyes pleading as she wiggled her hips, “please fuck me, Bucky.”
Fuck.
Bucky couldn’t think much after that, his body moving of its own volition as he pulled out and slammed back inside her pussy.
It was one thrust. One single thrust had her arching her back and shouting out his name.
He completely broke down, fucking her with abandon, just wanting to hear more of her; feel deeper inside of her.
The bedpost slammed against the wall repeatedly as she screamed with every hit of Bucky’s cock to her g-spot.
The way she was scratching his back, whining, wailing and writhing under him as he pounded her into his bed should’ve and could’ve been enough for Bucky, but he couldn’t help but want more.
“Open your eyes,” he gave her another command, knowing it might be hard for her to manage that one with how deep he was giving it to her.
But her eyes were instantly on him, fighting to stay open as his fat cock filled her up again and again.
“Keep looking at me,” Bucky had told her, his right hand coming up to wrap around her neck.
He was slow and gentle, just waiting for her to stop him or refuse what he was doing.
But she had managed to surprise him again because instead, her hand had come up to his, fully wrapping his palm around her throat before showing Bucky the right amount of pressure to apply.
Fuck, she had to be an angel sent specifically to him from heaven. It seemed like whatever god was up there had finally had mercy on him.
She wasn’t only okay with Bucky’s hand being on her neck, she was showing him how to choke her as his cock fucked her raw within an inch of her life too.
Bucky felt his thrusts stutter as he almost came at the sight of her: mouth open with nothing but his name coming out of it, throat held in his palm and eyes battling to stay open as they rolled back in her head, her pussy chocking his cock.
And when he thought she couldn’t get anymore perfect, she started screaming out a request, “can I please cum? Please, Bucky!”
She was asking his permission to let herself feel the pleasure he was so willingly giving her.
Bucky felt high as he groaned, “cum”, and watched her hand hastily come down to rub her clit once, twice before she fell apart around his cock.
Her thighs involuntarily clasped around Bucky as they shook with the rest of her body, her orgasm hitting her like a thousand trains, making her back bow.
Bucky’s hand tightened around her throat the slightest bit as he felt her pussy shutter around his cock and felt himself get closer to his own release, thrusts becoming erratic.
“Please cum inside me, Bucky. Fill me up with your cum, need it,” she pled and the man could only take so much.
Bucky came and he came hard, proving the cum he had painted her body with earlier to be just a sample of what his cock really had to offer.
When they could both breathe normally again, she found herself in his arms, pitching him an idea, too satisfied and full of cum to stop herself and rethink.
And to her happiness, Bucky actually agreed.
~
When they first started that type of deal, she said she didn’t want a relationship.
Bucky respected that and he was okay with it because although he liked her very much, he knew he wasn’t the relationship type himself. He didn’t believe himself fit for romantic relationships. He thought he was too messed up for such stuff.
And she was just like him.
She didn’t know how to be loved; didn’t know how to receive love. She didn’t think she deserved it. She didn’t think she was worth it. Never thought of herself as beautiful enough or attractive enough or lovable enough.
So the dynamic they came up with was their best option.
They were going to be friends with benefits. Except, the benefits were much more extreme than the usual, vanilla sex that would come to mind. So friends with benefits with a fun twist.
After being manipulated for so long, Bucky wanted nothing but to be in charge of his life, body and mind; to be in a position of power where he had the upper hand.
She, on the other hand, needed her freewill to be taken away from her. Being as responsible as she was in her everyday life, she would get too exhausted; drained. She wanted decisions to be made for her as she only obeyed and conformed. She wanted to be used until her head held no thoughts of her deadlines or tasks.
She wanted choking and spanking and bondage. She wanted domination.
Bucky needed to feel in control, and she needed to give up control.
Take mine, she said, take my control away and make it yours.
It was a perfect match. They had clearly communicated their boundaries, wants and needs. They had established their roles, likes and dislikes. And they had agreed on a few simple rules:
It was strictly sex; only sex.
No kissing on the lips no matter what.
No cuddling afterwards even if aftercare took place.
No strings attached.
The safe word meant they stopped; no questions asked.
Bucky wasn’t exactly on board with number 2 because he knew what her lips felt like on his and he wanted more of that. But she said it would only complicate things; that it might get feelings involved and they couldn’t have that.
So he agreed. He really just wanted her to be as comfortable as possible.
And they had almost done it all in 6 months. She had let Bucky tie her down, spank her, choke her, use toys on her, edge her, overstimulate her, fuck her in every position known to humans and on every service that could take their weight and Bucky’s pace.
But deep down, Bucky knew that she still needed more even if she had claimed otherwise.
He knew that she was frequently going on dates in between their sessions, desperately searching for the one that would manage to sweep her off her feet and magically change the way she looked at herself with his unconditional love.
So when she sat with him that one day and told him she wanted to stop what they were doing because she wanted to commit to her new boyfriend, Bucky wasn’t surprised. He was heartbroken, but not surprised.
And so he let her go.
He didn’t want to. He never wanted to. But Bucky knew that he couldn’t give her what she wanted, and so he was going to let her have it with someone else. He needed her like the air he breathed, but he couldn’t bring himself to stand in her way.
Bucky was addicted to her, yes, but he wasn’t going to be selfish and get in the way of her possible happiness with that new boyfriend whoever he was. He just hoped that that new man deserved her.
~
The real surprise came when Bucky opened his door one day and she was standing there looking like an abandoned puppy three months after their last meeting.
Three months without her that have been torture. Three months during which Bucky couldn’t bear the mere idea of bringing another woman to his bed. Three months of replaying their intense scenes in his head with his hand down his pants.
Oh how he missed seeing her choke on his cock. He missed her begging for him to touch her, to relieve her heavy shoulders of everything they had to carry. He missed seeing her come for him so hard that tears would start rolling down her face.
But now she was here, and she didn’t look okay. And it made Bucky realize that he has mostly missed her being her.
“I need you, Buck,” she whispered and he instantly opened the door wider for her.
Bucky let her inside and she climbed on his lap the second he sat down. He held her in his arms on his couch for as long as she needed, internally aching to know what had gotten her looking so dejected.
He knew it had to do with the new man in her life and he could only calm himself down by imagining his fist slamming against the faceless man’s nose.
“What did he do?” Bucky finally broke the silence, making her pull her face from his neck and look at him.
God, she looked so hurt, so broken.
He wished he could fix it, but how could he when he himself needed fixing?
“If I ask you for a favor, would you do it for me?” Her faint voice asked instead, pulling away from their hug.
“You know I will,” Bucky replied without reluctance.
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
He would do anything for her. He would kill again for her, burn down whole cities and cross oceans on his bare feet for her if she asked him to.
She got up from Bucky’s lap, getting down on her knees before the couch just like the first night he had brought her home, “I want you to punish me, Bucky.”
“What?”
Where did that come from? She wanted to start a session? Now? In that state?
“I want you to spank me. Punish me.” She repeated calmly.
“Doll, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Bucky tried to remind her, wanting her to know that whatever that man did to ruin his relationship with her wasn’t her fault.
And he wasn’t seriously about to give her a spanking when she looked like that, so small and worn out and wounded.
“Please, Bucky.”
Damn, she begged so sweetly. But he just couldn’t.
Bucky never thought he would say no to a scene with her, especially a passionate one, but he couldn’t hurt her even more than she looked to be hurting.
That was not what they did this for.
“Doll, get up. Sit down and talk to me,” Bucky said softly, trying to lift her up by the shoulders.
“Buck, you said you’d do it.” A sad frown settled upon her delicate face with a look that Bucky knew well.
She was getting more heartbroken at his rejection. She really did want this. She needed it and she could only come to Bucky for it. How could he keep turning her down?
“Okay, doll. How many?” Bucky asked despite himself, rubbing his palms together.
“Not with your hands,” she said with a smile, getting up and walking inside the bedroom to his closet.
Bucky carded a hand through his long hair as he waited for her to come back with whatever item she was choosing, knowing this was going to be the hardest time he has ever had to cause her pain, even if it was pain she wanted and asked for.
“With this.” She left the belt she brought on Bucky’s lap as she got back to her place by his feet.
“Doll, this is the thickest belt I own,” Bucky told her, wanting to intimidate her into changing her mind.
He needed her to change her mind. He couldn’t hit her with that thing. Not today. Probably not ever.
“I know.” She nodded with the same sure smile.
“Doll, why?” Bucky touched her cheek tenderly, desperate to understand.
If she would just talk to him, he would do his best to fix it. He probably couldn’t, but he was ready to try.
“Please, Bucky. For me, I need this.” She, again, avoided answering his questions.
“This is gonna hurt, doll,” Bucky warned, examining the belt in his lap.
Damn, it was heavy.
“I know. That’s the point.” She nodded in acceptance, “I need it to hurt.”
“Doll.”
“C’mon, Buck, we’ve done this before. You’ve had me dangling from your ceiling for god’s sake!”
He remembered that day. It was a week after she had gotten promoted and everything was becoming too much for her.
She had Bucky suspend her upside down from his ceiling as he spanked her rear raw before getting her down and fucking her into oblivion until all she could worry about was if she would be able to take another orgasm.
She looked even sadder today, and she was asking for far less.
Maybe he could give her what she wanted.
“How many?” Bucky asked again with a clenched jaw, seeing that there was no way he was going to change her mind.
“As many as it takes for me to cry,” she replied and her answer sent a pang into Bucky’s chest.
So that was it. She needed to cry and she couldn’t. She just needed to cry; to give release to her pent-up tears.
Bucky knew that crying was something that she struggled with. He knew that one of the things she loved about what they did was the fact that she could cry during it all; during a spanking, an edging or even an intense orgasm.
But couldn’t it be done any other way this time? Maybe he could make her watch a sad movie or something?
“Doll, if it’s about you crying—”
“Bucky, please,” she stopped him, shaking her head with determination, “please give me this. I need it.”
If she could, she would have cried to get him to say yes faster.
Bucky sighed, glancing at her one final time before asking, “do you remember your safe word?”
“Red.” She smiled gratefully, adrenaline already pumping through her blood in anticipation.
Bucky slipped the hairband on his wrist down to his fingers, pulling his hair in a low bun before taking his shirt off, leaving himself in his white tank top.
Keeping his eyes on hers, he ordered: “strip and get on the bed, puppy. You know your position.”
“Thank you, Bucky.” She jumped up, placing a kiss on his cheek.
“What was that?” Bucky’s tone was deeper and his eyes darker.
It has started.
“Thank you, sir,” she quickly corrected herself.
“Go.”
One nod of his head and she was running to the bedroom to do as she was told.
As she took her clothes off, folding them piece by piece and leaving them on the chair in the corner of Bucky’s bedroom, he was outside readying himself for what he was about to do to her.
Bucky had pledged months ago that he would give her anything she needed or wanted during their sessions.
Leaving her fulfilled made him feel fulfilled and the first time he had his bare cock in her, Bucky knew he was wrapped around her littlest finger. It seemed like he was the one in control of those meet ups but control was actually always in her hands.
Now, if what she needed was a spanking to make her cry, Bucky knew how to give it to her, but he didn’t want to. He knew this belt was going to hurt a lot and he wished she would’ve chosen something less bad.
But a deal was a deal and he couldn’t back out now that he knew she was waiting naked on his bed.
She heard Bucky’s heavy steps coming closer and tried to regulate her breathing, reminding herself that she wanted this, that she begged for this, that she deserved this.
She trusted Bucky with her life, not just her body. She knew he was going to stop the minute she said her safe word and that made her a little calmer.
“You ready, puppy?” Bucky asked, gliding the tip of the belt across her bare ass from one cheek to the other.
She shivered, fixing her gaze on Bucky’s bedpost as she whispered, “yes, sir.”
And just like that came the first spank.
But it didn’t hurt, not like she had expected, not at all.
Bucky was going easy on her; too easy.
She didn’t like it.
“Harder, please,” she begged, lowering her head and sticking her ass out.
“Doll—”
“Bucky, please, you promised,” she pled, her voice thick with frustration at her inability to get what she needed from the one person who could give it to her.
Another spank came, a little stronger than the first, but still not enough.
“Did your arm get rusty in those three months?” She threw angrily, raising her eyes to glare at Bucky, “hit me like a man!”
Bucky knew she was just trying to rile him up, make him angry enough so that he would actually hurt her and even though he didn’t want to, he decided he would finally give her what she came for.
“Fine,” Bucky growled, pushing her face into his pillows by the hair and she immediately gave him a full view of her lower half, ass in the air and thighs spread.
He wasn’t going to be able to look at her face as he hurt her this time.
Bucky took a deep breath before finally giving her a real whip and she gasped at the force of it, “is that what you wanted, puppy?”
“Getting close,” she moaned, her words muffled into the pillows as she wiggled her ass for him.
Another similar spank hit her and then another and another until suddenly her body was getting hotter and her butt sorer.
She needed more. Just a little more to break the dam and get suffocating thoughts and burning tears out.
“More, please, sir,” she begged, voice so desperate that it had Bucky swallowing.
He gave an experimental whip on her thighs and she let out a startled scream.
“What’s your color?” Bucky asked at once, hesitant that he might have actually hurt her.
“Green.” Came her reply as she looked up to Bucky, “green, sir, please.”
She was begging for more of this.
Bucky recomposed himself and spanked her thighs with the belt again and she wailed out a “yes, thank you, sir!”, urging him on.
For the first time ever, however, Bucky was not enjoying this. He was not enjoying causing her pain and he was not enjoying knowing that he was supposed to make her cry by the end of it all.
His whips got faster and harder as his thoughts ran wild with worry, just wanting to get this over with as her moans and cries egged him on.
“Color?”
“Green!” She would answer every time he checked in with her.
Pictures of her boyfriend in bed with another woman flashed throw her mind and she stuck her ass out more, hiding her ashamed face in Bucky’s pillows. He let her touch him the way only she was supposed to touch him. He made her shout out in pleasure the way she never did with him. He made her scream his name; the name that was supposed to only roll off her tongue during intimate times.
Her mind kept replaying it all, making her squirm and stick her butt out further. She wanted it all to stop.
She needed this. She deserved this. She was stupid.
“Thank you, sir,” she muttered, a lump finally forming in her throat.
It seemed like whatever had happened this time, had been so bad that the normal amount of whips weren’t enough to get her mind off of it. She was still her, well out of sub space and still very much aware of the ache in her heart.
She needed that ache to move somewhere else, preferably to her ass.
“More, sir, please.”
Bucky’s shoulder started to slightly ache as he kept whipping her, again and again, just wanting it to be over so he could comfort her after as he heard her sniffles, and finally, with a particularly harsh spank on her lower thighs she screamed out, “red!”.
Bucky’s arm stopped immediately, dropping the belt on the floor as he listened as her soft cries get louder.
She burrowed her face in his pillow and let it all out, sobs wracking her entire body as she cried her bleeding heart out.
“Doll,” he whispered, regret filling him at the sight of her body trembling with each wail she let out of her chest.
He looked at her lower body and her ass and thighs were a crime scene, her skin painted in angry red welts all over.
“Please, leave me alone, Buck,” she wept, her face still hidden in his pillow.
“Let me take care of you, doll—”
“No, no. Just leave me,” she pleaded without turning to him.
“At least let me put something on your skin—”
“Please just leave me alone. Please, Bucky,” she sobbed harder, her fingers clutching the side of the pillow as she let her tears flow.
Bucky reluctantly left the room, giving her the space she asked for as guilt ate away at his heart.
He shouldn’t have listened to her. He shouldn’t have done that to her.
It was only when he sat down on the couch outside that he had realized how hard he had actually whipped her. His right shoulder ached, a few strands of his hair were out of place and sweat had forced by his hairline. All the realization did was make him feel more terrible about himself.
He knew he has done it before so many times, but this time was different.
She came to him hurt emotionally and instead of helping her feel better, he ended up hurting her physically too.
She did ask for it, but he could have said no. He could’ve insisted on not doing it.
The sound of her cries seemed never-ending and was absolutely heart-wrenching to listen to. Bucky could all but cover his ears to prevent it from reaching him as he beat himself up for causing it all again and again.
She winced as she sat up on the messy bed, hand on her naked chest as she tried to calm herself down, still hiccupping while her cries slowed down.
God, she had needed this so bad. She had needed it for days and she was so grateful for Bucky for giving it to her.
Being able to cry and let everything out was a blessing that people didn’t appreciate enough; one she was kind of deprived of and had to do a lot to get to enjoy.
When her heartbeat was somewhat slower and her tears have ceased, she slowly pulled herself down the bed and on her wobbly feet.
She looked out to the living room from the bedroom door to see Bucky back on the couch, leaning forward with his head in his hands and she knew he was blaming himself.
So she wiped her tears as much as she could and went back inside. She opened the drawer she knew too well and pulled out the Calendula cream Bucky had bought specifically for her.
She carefully walked to Bucky. She didn’t want him to feel guilty so she made sure not to wince as she took her steps.
She had wanted this. She had asked for it because she had needed it and he only helped her. She wasn’t going to let him berate himself for that.
She left the cream on the coffee table and gently removed Bucky’s hands from his face, guiding him to rest his back on the couch so she could sit herself back across his lap.
Bucky stopped her, standing up to take his pants off so that the material wouldn’t rub against her sensitive skin.
She smiled, her heart lurching at his gentleness and thoughtfulness.
He let her manipulate him into position, closely watching her red-rimmed eyes and swollen nose and lips as she made herself as comfortable as possible on his lap, the new lashes covering her behind out of his sight for now.
Bucky hugged her close, his hands stroking up and down her bare back as she pushed her nose in its place in the crook of his neck, “thank you.” She breathed gratefully.
Bucky only patted her back, pulling her closer in reply. He knew she meant her thanks, but he was still mad at himself for doing it.
She pulled back and let him take her in for a second before leaning in, making Bucky swallow.
“Now fuck me,” she whispered on his lips, grinding down on his covered cock despite the pain it gave her every time she rubbed her inflamed skin on Bucky’s boxers.
“Doll, I think you’ve had enough for today,” Bucky sighed, softly trying to get her off of him.
“Please, just once. I won’t ask for anything else.” She pleaded, her hands clutching the material of Bucky’s tank top, not wanting to leave his lap.
She didn’t want to be away from him. She just got here.
“Doll, give me the cream so I can take care of you,” he demanded, trying to maintain a stern tone so she would listen.
“You can take care of me this way too!” She whined, needy and desperate as she ground herself harder, smiling when she found him hard beneath her.
“I can’t, doll. I can’t. You’re hurt.” Bucky shook his head, gently pushing her to the side and getting up before she could straddle him again.
“Please, Buck,” she croaked out, on the verge of crying again as she grabbed onto his waist, “please don’t walk away.”
“Do you promise not to try anything if I sit back down?” He asked although he knew the answer.
“But I need you!” Anguished tears rolled down her flushed cheeks, “just one orgasm. Please, just one.”
Her constant begging was making Bucky’s cock leak inside his briefs, hard as a rock as he tried his best not to give in.
He had missed her so damn much, but this wasn’t right.
“Doll, come on, quit it. You’re hurt—”
“I haven’t cum in three months.” She cut him off, sniffling as more tears left her eyes, “he— he couldn’t— please.” She begged yet again, her hands cravingly clawing at Bucky’s tank top, wanting him to be close again.
“What?!” Bucky sat back down, wiping her tears away as he took her back into his arms.
She nodded in shame as she cast her eyes down, burrowing her face in his shoulder, “he couldn’t make me cum”.
“Not even with his mouth?”
“Especially not with his mouth,” she muttered, hating the memory of a different man touching her.
“And you didn’t get yourself off?”
She shook her head, still embarrassed as she hid from him.
“Why not?!”
“Couldn’t touch myself without your permission.” She looked up to him, her teary eyes sincere.
Bucky let himself just look at her for a beat longer.
She was with another man that she supposedly wanted to be committed to, but she still followed Bucky’s rules during that relationship.
“I can make you cum, doll,” Bucky said, his gaze darkening, “but I have one condition.”
“Anything,” she whispered, desperate for his touch, his lips, his cock.
She had missed Bucky beyond compare.
“Allow me to break a rule.”
“What—”
“I need to kiss you, baby.”
She smiled, her heart relieved despite its fluttering as she answered by pressing her lips to Bucky’s.
He laid her on her back on his couch, careful not to rub himself against her lower region as he devoured her lips. Bucky sighed on her lips, the first taste always the best.
He hasn’t tasted those lips in nine months, since their very first time together. He remembered them tasting of beer back then, but today it was chocolate lacing her tongue.
It was Bucky’s turn to be desperate as he ate up her whimpers, his tongue dancing with hers as he deepened the kiss. He wanted to gobble her up, get as close to her as possible, taste every inch and swallow every whine.
He realized he couldn’t get as close as he wanted without his boxers scratching the welts on her sore skin.
Bucky pulled away for a second, leaving her to chase his mouth as he chuckled.
She whined, making grabby hands at him.
When he was done taking his boxers off, he got back on top of her, tenderly pushing her legs to her chest to keep them from bumping against the couch before slotting himself between her open legs as his mouth found its way back to hers.
“I can’t believe I let you take this away from me for so long,” he groaned, biting down on her lower lip.
She moaned in reply, pushing her hips up so she could get his cock to stroke against her.
She couldn’t believe she had deprived herself of those kisses either because she knew that she had fallen for the man anyways.
One swipe had Bucky hissing as he felt how wet she was under him. He has needed her for so long, not letting himself find any kind of relief with another woman in her absence.
“Do you want my fingers, doll?”
“No, no, gimme your cock, Bucky, please,” she pleaded, squirming on her back on the couch, pushing her hips up.
“I can’t do that, baby. You know it. It would be too much,” he sighed, his thumb stroking her cheek.
“Bucky, please. I can take it. I’ve taken worse!”
“I can’t. I can’t hurt you anymore, doll.” Bucky admitted, his hand sliding her hair behind her ear.
“Bucky,” she whined and his eyes gave her a firm look, making her shut up at once.
“It’s either my fingers or you get nothing, puppy. What do you want?”
“Your fingers, sir,” she replied obediently, pulling her legs further against her chest to give him all the access he would need.
“That’s a good puppy.” Bucky smiled, thumb circling her swollen clit.
“Please,” she breathed, already throwing her head back at the simple touch.
Bucky chuckled, though he was internally fuming at the fact that she was with a ‘man’ who didn’t make her cum for three whole months, “ready for the first one, puppy?”
“Yes, sir.” She nodded quickly.
Bucky carefully slipped two of his metal fingers inside of her dripping cunt, groaning at the tightness he has missed so much, “I know this hand’s your favorite”.
“I thought you said one!” She moaned in surprise, pushing down on his fingers still.
“I meant first orgasm, puppy,” Bucky laughed, scissoring his fingers inside of her, opening her up exactly like he knew she liked.
And when he curled his fingers just right? She was wailing out the yes’s and thank you’s like it was the last time she would ever get fingered in her life.
“Fuck, baby, squeezing my fingers so hard already,” Bucky groaned, the tips of his vibranium fingers nudging her sweet spot with every indulging thrust, massaging and abusing until he saw her thighs quiver with her first orgasm.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she squealed as Bucky let her come down from her high, fingers slowing down their movements without leaving her leaking pussy.
“Thank me when we’re done, doll.” He smirked, twisting his fingers inside of her.
Bucky got them out for a second only to slip back three fingers instead of two, feeling her cunt hungrily swallow them as she cried out at the delicious stretch.
He bit his lip, shaking his head as he got to business, “fuck, I’ve missed you so much”.
~
“How we feeling, puppy?” Bucky asked her as he saw her legs tense again.
“So good, so so good, sir. Thank you,” she sobbed in pleasure, feeling her thighs shake for the fifth time that afternoon.
“You’re such a good puppy, cumming so hard for me,” Bucky groaned, feeling the pull of her pussy as he tried to take his fingers out, moving them on her clit instead, “keep cumming baby”.
“I can’t take anymore. Please, I can’t.” She shook her head as she tried to squirm away from Bucky’s skilled fingers.
“Okay, okay,” Bucky chuckled, raising one hand up in surrender as his other went into his mouth.
She was gasping for air as she let her legs go, grimacing when her ass touched the couch. She raised her thighs back up, opening them when Bucky hovered over her body for another kiss.
His cock swiped against her sensitive pussy, making her clench when she felt how hard he was. Bucky was so hard it must be getting painful by now.
“Bucky, I can do one more,” she said against his lips.
“Oh you getting greedy on me, puppy?” Bucky smiled, instantly complying as he brought his hand down between their bodies.
She shivered at the mere tracing of his fingers on her pussy lips, “not with your fingers.”
“Come on now, baby, I thought we’ve already talked about this,” Bucky said, ready to pull away from her body.
“You don’t have to put it inside.” She held onto his waist with all her might, “just rub it on me. I can take that.”
“Baby,” Bucky hesitated, his resolve getting weaker as he imagined the feeling of her silky, drenched pussy under his cock.
“Please, Bucky, just rub it on my pussy. Use me. Make yourself cum.”
“You’re gonna be the death of me,” Bucky whispered, getting hold of his cock.
He swiped the tip between the lips of her cunt, moaning lewdly at the feeling he had missed for months.
She was so wet, so sensitive and so soft.
Bucky was never one to cum fast; not after his very first time with her. But she looked so good under him, already fucked out of her mind. She felt even better and he could only handle so much.
He couldn’t believe she was going to make him cum this quick just by letting him nudge her pussy with the tip of his cock.
“Fuck, baby, this beautiful pussy’s gonna make me bust and I didn’t even get to fuck her!” Bucky groaned, feeling his abs get taut as he tried to hold off his orgasm for as long as physically possible.
He didn’t know where to look; she looked gorgeous everywhere and it was making it harder for him not to cum right then and then.
“I’m cumming,” she gave a shout before shaking underneath him for the sixth time.
“Fuck, yes, cum for me, doll.” Bucky groaned, squeezing at his base to hold his orgasm off.
“Slip the tip inside me, Buck,” she begged, still catching her breath and writhing underneath him needily as if he hadn’t just given her five mind-blowing orgasms on his fingers.
He shook his head, trying to focus on not cumming.
“Please, Bucky, just the tip.”
“Shit, don’t say stuff like that.” Bucky’s head tipped back as he closed his eyes for a second to keep from staring into her imploring ones.
“Please, Bucky. Give me your cum. I missed being filled up of your cum so much.” She begged further, “I’m clean, I promise.”
“I never doubted you, puppy.” Bucky opened his eyes, pressing his lips to hers at once.
“Then give it to me,” she moaned on his lips, holding his face close to hers by the cheek, “give me all of your cum, Bucky. Fill me up until I’m leaking all over myself and your couch.”
“Fuck, doll, I can’t hold back anymore. You wanna be filled up? I’m gonna fill you up,” he growled, popping the fat tip of his cock inside her pussy.
She arched her back for Bucky, desperate to feel more of him, “thank you.”
She missed this cock stretching her to her limits so bad. She missed its girth and its veins and the hot cum it paints her walls with.
Bucky could all but let go at the first clench of her pussy, feeling his cum shoot inside of her until it had filled her up to the brim.
He watched her sigh in satisfaction, a smile spreading on her sweet face as Bucky’s hot load filled up her pulsating cunt.
Bucky reluctantly slipped out of her, watching his cum leak out of her ruined pussy, “oh thank you, doll.”
She couldn’t keep her thighs off the couch anymore, body limp and exhausted. She hissed once again when her raw skin touched the rough couch but didn’t pull her legs back up.
Bucky sighed, kissing her forehead lovingly before going to the bathroom to get a wet cloth to clean her up.
He tried to be gentle as he moved around her skin, wiping away the cum and the sweat. He went to leave the cloth in the bathroom and when he came back, she was tiredly perching herself on his lap.
Bucky smiled, taking the calendula cream from the coffee table to finally rub some against her marked butt and thighs. Aftercare was the most important part and he wasn’t about to forego it.
“How the hell did he fail at making you cum?” Bucky couldn’t help but ask as his palm rubbed circles on her sore skin.
“I guess it was me and my unorgasmable pussy.” She chuckled, making Bucky even madder at the man.
He had caused her to think there was something wrong with her and her body?
“Seems pretty orgasmable to me, doll. He’s the one with a broken penis.” Bucky grunted, focusing on keeping his touch gentle on her skin.
“Could make the other girl cum just fine, so not that broken.” She mumbled into her forearms as she rested her chin on them, wanting nothing more than to disappear.
“What?”
Now Bucky really was angry.
“He cheated on me.”
Her voice was so sad, so shattered.
“Doll,”
Bucky didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know if there was even something to say to make this better.
“Yeah, found them together in his bed and everything. They do try to cover up with the white bed sheet just like the movies.” She chuckled again.
She was making jokes, trying to make light of her pain like she always would, but Bucky wasn’t laughing.
“Doll, I’m so sorry. He’s an asshole.”
“It’s fine, really. Doesn’t come as a surprise to me that I wasn’t enough for him.”
“It isn’t fine and you are enough. You’re everything.”
“Bucky, you don’t have to—”
“Be my girl.”
“What?” Her head whipped back so fast, thinking she must have imagined the words.
“Forget about the rules and the deal and forget about our fears. Be my girl, doll,” Bucky repeated.
“Buck, I—”
“I know I’m messed up beyond repair, but if there’s one thing I can’t mess up, it’s loving you, doll. And if I suck at it, let me die trying my best for you.”
“Why’d you have to go and talk about dying now!” She sat back up, not waiting for her skin to fully absorb the cream as she straddled him again.
Her body was hot all over as she took it his words; words she had imagined him saying while standing alone in the shower so many times before that she’d lost count.
“Be my girl.” Bucky smiled, “let me love you like you deserve, doll.”
“You—”
“Yes. I love you,” Bucky admitted, shrugging, his blunt nails clawing at the small of her back nervously.
“You love me love me?”
“I love you love you.” His palms flattened against the small of her back as he nodded with a bigger smile.
“I love you love you!” She exclaimed angrily, “why didn’t you say anything!” She punched Bucky’s chest.
“Ow!” Bucky laughed, holding her hand midway before she could hit him again, “I didn’t think I deserved you.” He kissed her fist.
The gesture left her quiet as a smile formed on her face despite herself.
She cupped Bucky’s cheek and kissed his lips softly, “you’re an idiot.”
“Still think I don’t deserve you, doll. But I can’t pretend like I’m not madly in love with you anymore.”
He tried to deepen the kiss but she pulled away, shocked.
“Bucky, what are you talking about? If anything, I don’t deserve you!”
“Baby, you deserve the whole world.”
“I don’t want the whole world!” She threw her hands in the air, “just one idiot who would hold me on his lap after a good spanking,” she mumbled shyly, making Bucky laugh.
“This one idiot is all yours if you’d have him, doll.” Bucky’s smile was for once reaching his eyes as he brought her in for another kiss.
“I love you,” she repeated, throwing her body around his, holding him tight, fearing it might be a dream.
“I love you too, baby. I don’t deserve you but fuck I love you so much it keeps me up at night like a teenager,” he confessed in her hair, his big hand pressing her closer to him.
“Stop saying that.” She looked him in the eyes, “you deserve everything good in this whole universe and then some. I just hope I could be enough.”
“Could be enough— doll, you’re enough. You’re just right. The exact amount. You’re it. You’re the best for me and the only one I want.”
She didn’t know what to say to that so she put her lips on Bucky’s again and let the kiss demolish her fears and insecurities.
She was in Bucky’s arms and she was enough. She was safe and loved.
This was Bucky. Bucky, who was never intimidated by her professional success. Bucky, who has met her at her worst. Bucky, who has never done her wrong. Bucky, who has gotten to see the real, raw her and never turned away.
It was in that very moment that she realized that running away from Bucky to find love with other men was the worst crime she had committed against herself because now the mere idea of being out of this man’s arms and heart was too illogical and incredulous to even consider.
“I love you,” Bucky repeated on her lips as they caught their breaths.
And she could see it all in his loving, blue eyes as they adored every inch of her face: she was home and she was never getting lost again.
~
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daydreaming-nerd · 2 days
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The Prophecy (Lucien Vanserra x Rhys! Sister)/(Azriel x Rhys! Sister) Part 3
AN: I'm not really sure if I like how this turned out, so if you're new here I promise my writing it typically so much better. ALSO there are so many new faces on here! I wanted to say hello and thank you for the love once again! If you liked this fic and you love drama, forbidden love, protective acotar boys, a bit of a slow burn, and political intrigue you would LOVE and I mean LOVE my fic Young Love and Old Money. I’m still writing it but it’s almost completed! Go check it out you won’t be disappointed!
and of course check out my masterlist
Summary: The only thing worse than having Azriel not know about the bond is watching him and Elain carry on like she doesn’t have a mate as well. Lucien and you have been long time friends but things change after one fateful starfall celebration. It’s not wrong if both of your mates don’t want you right? 
Warnings: smut, so much lucien fluff, happy ending for lucien (for once) :)
Word count: 5057
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We arrived in the house in silence, the only thing to fill the void was the crackling of the enchanted fire that always sprang to life whenever I walked through the door. My eyes were fixed on the floorboards, studying every grain of wood as I put together what had just happened. 
I had told Azriel about the bond, and I did it in anger. I had imagined telling him a million different ways over the past 400 years but never did imagine doing it out of spite. I was just so angry with Elain and her insufferable entitlement that had me seeing red. If anyone should act in such a manner, it should be me, I was a princess after all. 
I was furious with Elain there was no doubt about that, but the voice that kept echoing in my mind was Azriel’s. How he yelled at me. I had known him my whole life and I had never once been afraid of him,  until today. 
As if he was tired of the silence, Lucien brushed his hand under my chin bringing my gaze to his, it wasn’t until then that I realized I was crying. I didn’t even give him a chance to ask if I was alright before I started blubbering. 
“Lu I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to. She just got under my skin and I-” 
“Shhh” he cooed, pulling me into his chest. “It’s okay, I understand. I didn’t react much better when Azriel started talking.” he chuckled, no doubt remembering how he preemptively called me his wife, the words had rolled off his tongue so effortlessly it was admirable. 
“He’s never raised his voice to me like that. Not ever,” I hiccup into his chest, his scent like apples, spiced berries and woodsmoke. 
“I should’ve burned him to a crisp for doing so he has no right to treat you that way,” he said, pressing a kiss to my forehead.
“It’s alright, now that he knows he’ll be entitled to act possessive of me,” I sigh, starting to feel my pulse slow in his arms. 
“And I’m not granted that same right? To protect you?” Lucien said, tilting my chin up to meet his gaze. 
“Well, you aren’t my mate,” I laugh looking into his eyes. 
“And what if that doesn’t matter to me? That we aren’t mates? What if I think that the Cauldron made a terrible, horrible mistake by not binding me to you in every way imaginable?” he confesses. 
I search his face for a hint of that playful gleam I saw earlier. The trickster, the silver tongued fox who might be playing me for a fool. But I didn’t find it, for all those fiery eyes bore was sincerity. 
“What do you mean Lu?” I ask earnestly. 
“Exactly what I said, you aren’t my mate, but…” he stops as if to consider his words. “But I still feel like you are in a way, I feel protective of you. In a way I always have, remember when you scraped your knee climbing that cherry blossom tree in the spring court all those years ago?” 
I smile remembering the event, I had wanted some cherry blossoms to braid into my hair. “Yes I do, I still have the scar.” I laughed. 
“I know you do, I see it every time I make love to you,” he smiled back. “I remember carrying you to the healers at the spring court from half a mile out. Even then I couldn’t stand the thought of you bearing any sort of scar. What I’m trying to say is that you may not be my mate, but I love you like you’re mine. Because you are, you are mine.”
My breath gets caught in my throat and my eyes go wide at those three little words. The ones I thought I might’ve felt too these past few months. 
I love you. 
For a year now things between Lucien and I had been strictly situational, just a means to an end. Then I started noticing the little things, his toothbrush next to mine, his laundry in my hamper, him having his own side of the bed. Things changed, but it wasn’t a bad change, which was a new idea for me, as I had always resented change. But not this, this was good. 
I thought I had felt that emotion with Lucien before. The night that I came home and he had made us both dinner. The time he bought me the second book in a series just because he noticed I was almost done with the first. The week I was sick he nursed my back to health. I thought I felt love each and every one of those times, but I wasn’t sure. I always teetered on saying it but never caved. But as I stood here in his arms, watching his eyes light up as he said those words to me, I knew I felt the same.
“I-I love you too Lucien,” I said quietly so only he could hear, even though we were the only two people in the house. 
He wastes no time bringing his mouth to mine, for so long our kisses had been fervent, needy. Both of us desiring pleasure and the codling that came after it. This kiss was different than all the rest, in it I felt real love. The kind I had only read about in my numerous romance novels. I dreamed of being kissed this way my entire life. 
I felt strong hands grip my waist hoisting me up. My legs instantly wrapped around his waist as he started bounding up the stairs, his enthusiasm making me giggle.
“Believe me my love, there is nothing funny about the way I’m going to ravish you tonight,” he smirked before kicking open the bedroom door. 
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The next day I woke up slowly, not wanting to move from where Lucien had placed me on his chest last night. Both of us took our time to have a steady morning knowing that later in the day there would be chaos. Lucien got up first, always the more responsible of the two of us. When I murmured a sleepy protest he simply chuckled and placed me back in bed, where I snuggled into the warm sheets that smell faintly of him. 
When I woke for the second time I smelled that delectable scent of pancakes wafting through the small townhouse. The aroma pulled me from the sheets in a sleepy haze as if my body was controlled by some other worldly force. Slipping on my blue nightgown and padding downstairs into the kitchen I found Lucien half clothed and cooking breakfast for the two of us.
“Blueberry pancakes, not chocolate chip,” he assured me, sprinkling fresh blueberries onto a pancake. 
“You remembered,” I sighed leaning against the counter watching him intently. When Lucien had first made breakfast for me I was taken aback by his cooking skills, there was no way that this man was the complete package. 
“How could I forget?” he laughed, flipping a pancake. “Last time I made chocolate you were on your cycle and you were so befuddled that you yanked the spatula out of my hand and spanked me with it.” 
I slid between him and the stove, “Don’t act like you didn’t like it,” I say my voice low and sultry as my hand slowly reaches for the spatula he’s hidden behind his back. 
“You little minx,” he teases when he feels my fingers searching for the torture weapon. The mischievous gleam flashes in his eyes and before I can run he swipes a blob of whipped cream from a nearby bowl onto my cheek. 
“Lu!” I scoff going to wipe the cream off my cheek but he grasps my wrist to stop me. 
“Fair is fair my dear,” he smirks before licking the sweetness off my cheek. I immediately feel my toes curl at the fiery sensation.
“You are insatiable,” I laughed, moving away from him to properly wipe my face.
I feel a quick slap to my arse with the spatula and I turn to see my fiancé standing with a self satisfied smirk. “Says you little miss ‘more Lucien more!’” he teases recalling how I begged him to touch me last night.
“I knew you would  tease me about that!” I shouted, pushing his study form as hard as I could, he didn’t even teeter. “I’ll never beg for you again!” 
He smiles, grabbing my left hand and pulling it to his mouth, placing a kiss on the ring adorning it. “There will never be a need,” he smirked. “Now go and set the table, babysitting Nyx duties can’t be put off for forever.” 
I had told Rhys and Feyre that I would happily watch Nyx this afternoon. Of course that was before they knew about Lucien, who might’ve gotten away with a pleasant afternoon in my townhouse with a new book but now? He was shackled to me to watch the young one.
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 While the little High Lord in training was typically quite docile, he had just learned to crawl and had begun flapping his little wings, which meant trouble was becoming the new normal. Which is exactly what had happened today…
“Nyx no!” I shouted as he reached for a heavy book on one of the bookshelves, his tiny wings helping him to gain the extra inch or two of ground he needed. 
I grabbed him from underneath his shoulders and brought him into my arms, bouncing him on my hip as his eyes caught the shiny necklace I was wearing. His little hands grabbed at it and I figured it was better than a vase or another heavy book. 
“Just imagine till he can actually fly,” Lucien chuckled, coming up behind me.
“That won’t be for quite a while thankfully,” I laugh, bouncing the babe up and down.
“Are you so sure about that? Cassian seems to already be giving him lessons.” he points out. 
“I don’t even want to think about a flying toddler,” I scoff and Lucien chuckles behind me. 
 He pressed a kiss to the top of my head and I could feel his lips curling into a smile.“Is it bad that I’m enjoying watching this?” he admitted. 
“Watching what?” I laugh as Nyx puts the necklace in his mouth. 
“You, with a baby in your arms,” he said. 
“I’ve always wanted children,” I said and a beat of silence passed until I decided to be bold. “Lu, do you think we could ever have children?” I ask, afraid to turn around and possibly see a wary look on his face.
I felt Lucien’s chuckle reverberate behind me, “As many as you would like my darling.” he laughed. 
I whipped around with Nyx to search his eyes for a hint of uncertainty, but he seemed happy about the idea, “Really?” I asked in disbelief. 
“Of course,” he assured me. 
“I want a million just like little Nyx here,” I smile looking at the babe in my arms. 
“Minus the wings of course,” Lucien laughs behind me and I pause. 
My entire life I had always pictured my children with wings. Small, delicate little things that I would ‘ooo’ and ‘ahhh’ over.  I remembered seeing the Illyrian children in Windhaven growing up, I was always so happy when mothers would let me hold their babies, their wings so adorably small. I looked forward to having winged children of my own, but now things had changed. 
“What is it my dear?” Lucien asked, breaking me out of my trance. 
“Oh it’s nothing, it’s just that when I pictured my children I always figured they would have wings,” I say, pressing a kiss to Nyx’s temple. 
As if summoned, Azriel walked in, Rhys and Feyre in tow, signaling that their meeting was over. His eyes flitted to me, no doubt having heard what I had said. Lucien’s hand tightened on my hip. 
“How was he? Was he good?” Feyre smiled crossing the room to take her son in her arms once more.
“He was, but those wings are going to give me grief one day,” I smile watching Nyx snuggle into his mothers arms. 
“Don’t worry I’m terrified too,” Rhys laughed, approaching his mate and child. 
A comfortable silence ensued as I watched the little family reunite, smiles and warmth surrounding them. Lucien’s hand came to my shoulder, as if promising that we too would have that same picture perfect family one day. 
“Can we talk?” Azriel asked timidly, taking a step away from the doorway he leaned against. Feyre and Rhys take out of the room, no doubt feeling the change in the atmosphere.  
I searched his eyes for a hint of aggression but all I found was remorse, “Yes we may,” I say quietly.
“If you lay one hand on her spymaster I will burn you to ash,” Lucien growled, his hand on my shoulder tightening possessively.
“You have my word that I will not touch her in anger,” Azriel said earnestly, not a hint of teasing or mockery. Instead, a new found respect for Lucien showed in his eyes. 
I go to follow Azriel into the other room when I feel Lucien grab my hand pulling me into his broad chest. 
“Wait,” he said before slamming his lips to mine. The gesture was so passionate I couldn’t help but let out the slightest of moans as I felt him cradle the back of my head. This wasn’t just a kiss goodbye, it was a display of power to Azriel, letting him know how serious the two of us were. I couldn’t help but feel my lips turn up at Lucien’s sudden daring. 
I felt him back away to survey my face, as if looking for any hesitancy to enter into a conversation with Azriel. When he was certain I was comfortable he placed a kiss on my brow, “I’ll be right here if you need me.” he said as I dropped his hand and followed Azriel into Rhys’ study. 
The doors to the office closed with a resolute click as Azriel turned to face me, his eyes somber. 
“First and foremost I wanted to say I’m sorry for the way I behaved the other night. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that or said the things I did” he said leaning against the desk a food meter away from me, as if Lucien had scared him from coming any closer. 
“It’s alright I forgive you. I shouldn’t have blurted out such an important thing anyways. We were both at fault.” I say earnestly. 
Azriel pulls his gaze from his boots to me, “I heard what you said in there, about your children having wings. Did you ever picture that those children would be?” he starts leaving me room to finish the sentence for him. 
“Yours? Yes.” I say timidly.
Azriel sighs as if weighing what all this means, “How long have you known?” he prompts. 
I think to lie, but it wouldn’t bear well on my soul. It was best to get it all out in the open. 
“400 years.” I confess and he curses under his breath. “I knew it the night you danced with me at the solstice ball in the Hewn City.” 
“Fuck y/n,” he curses again, turning to brace his hands on the desk behind him and I take a tentative step towards him. 
“I’m sorry I never told you, that wasn’t fair to you.” I sigh, but he doesn’t reply so I continue on. “It’s just that every time I thought about it you were pining for Mor and then Elain. I never felt I stood a chance. But you would talk to me about them, and even though it broke my heart to hear how you loved them so, it was better than losing you. I told myself that if I couldn’t have your love I would cherish your friendship, and maybe that was selfish of me but I did it.” 
Azriel finally turned from the desk to meet my gaze and I tried to offer him the most sympathetic glance I could. 
“I understand why you never told me, but I still wish I had known. Thing’s might’ve been different.” he said, running a hand through his hair. 
I pause to consider his words, “Would they be?” I ask. 
He looked at me in confusion, like I was dispelling the idea that the sky was blue. I understood his disarray. For thousands of years things had always been the same, mates were mates and that was that. But maybe what Lucien said last night did have merit. 
“Are you not happy with Elain?” I prompt him with a light heart, as I finally started to feel some solace in my own words. 
“y/n I don’t want to-” 
“You do not burden me Az.” I interrupt him, knowing what he was going to say. “Tell me truthfully.” 
A blush tints his cheeks as he averts his gaze to his boots once more, “I am happy. I am very happy.” he smiles as if he can’t help it. 
“I think it was meant to be this way,” I say honestly watching the shadowsinger reeling in front of me. 
“What about you? Are you?”
“Happy?” I ask, glancing to the door where I know Lucien waits for me on the other side. “I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time.” I smile answering him. 
“How long have you and him been… you know?” he asks, seemling losing all tension in his body as he sees me at ease.  
“Since starfall,” I answered, remembering the first time Lu kissed me. 
“A year?!” Az balked, raising his voice in disbelief. 
I laugh watching his face drop, “it’s interesting the things you don’t notice when you’re in love,” I wink at him, knowing he was too caught up with Elain to pay any mind to Lu and I. 
Azriel shakes his head as if processing this new information before he turns to me again, “And do you love him?” he asks. 
I smile remembering last night, “I do, I love him very much.” I answer. 
“And does he love you?” Az presses further, as if he needs to tie up all loose ends before he can be at ease with the entire situation. 
“I think he made that pretty clear a couple minutes ago,” I laughed, referring to the kiss he gave me. 
“Yeah I suppose I got that message loud and clear,” Azriel chuckled as a pause of silence fell over us. “I think… I think in another lifetime we would’ve made each other really happy.”
“Maybe even this lifetime.” I say sadly thinking of what could’ve been. “But I love Lucien, he chose me when I thought no one else would, and maybe I’m making a mistake by marrying him. But somehow it feels like the first right thing I’ve done in the past 400 years.” 
“He’s a very lucky man,” Azriel remarked with a certain sadness. “I hope that you will be happy with him,” he finished seemingly giving me his blessing.
“I think it was meant to be this way, don't you?” I ask, finally feeling my heart and my conscious lighten. 
“I do,” he smiles before holding his hand out to me. “Friends?” he asks. 
I nod clasping my hand in his, “Friends.” 
“Let’s get you back to your fiancé before I find myself in a pile of ash on the floor,” Azriel chuckles, putting his hand on the door. 
I laugh with him and when the door to the living room opens I find Lucien and Elain hugging. 
My heart is caught in my throat as I realize that perhaps Lucien might’ve changed his mind. I wouldn’t have blamed him if he did. She was his true mate after all and, she was astonishingly beautiful. Maybe I was misled when Azriel and I settled our differences. 
Both their heads whipped our way, and Lucien’s smile shined brightly. I was unsure of who that smile was for until he ran over to me, grabbing me by the hips and spinning me around. 
“It is done,” Lucien cheered and out of the corner of my eye I saw Azriel throw an arm around Elain’s shoulders. 
“What is?” I laughed once my feet were back on the ground. 
“I don’t want to wait any longer. I want to call you my wife by sundown.” Lucien said affectionately. 
“And why shouldn’t you wait? She’s a princess after all, you should snatch her up while you can,” Elain called out affectionately from Azriel’s side. I couldn’t help but look at the two of them standing there.  
A hand snaked its way under my chin taking my attention to him before he planted his lips on mine. “Be mine, forever.” he proposed. 
I couldn’t stop the smile that graced my face, “Okay,” I said quietly. 
A cheer from Elain erupted behind me and suddenly it felt like all the pieces were falling into place, like everything I had ever wanted for myself had now come true. 
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The ceremony was short, just like Lucien and I had wanted. However, instead of an elopement it was a small gathering, Cass and Ness, Amren, Mor, Az and Elain and of course Rhys and Feyre were present. I wore my mothers dress and at some point Lu had slipped out to buy me a proper ring, not that I minded the old one. 
The rest of the night was filled with drinking and frivolity. The whole family laughing and telling stories, and for the first time in a long time, I felt like I belonged with all of them, as I sat on my husband's lap. It wasn’t until many glasses of wine later that I found Lucien carrying me bridal style over the threshold of our home. 
“This really isn’t necessary,” I laughed, holding a spare bottle of wine in my hand as he stepped through the doorway, the fireplace roaring to life. 
“It’s traditional for a husband to carry his wife over the threshold of their home after the wedding.” he retorted, stepping inside the house and closing the door with his foot. 
“For humans not for fae,” I corrected him as he finally set me down on slightly unsteady legs. 
“Maybe I just wanted an excuse to carry you,” he laughed, taking the wine from my hand and setting it on a side table by the door. 
“You never need an excuse for that,” I laughed, throwing my arms around his neck. 
“Well in that case,” he smirks before picking me up again and bounding up our stairs.
My feet don’t hit the floor until we’re in our room, his lips finding mine in an instant. With a wave of my hand I remove my dress, magically placing it back to wherever my dear brother found it. Lucien tossed his shirt over his head so that my hands might wander the plains of his toned chest. His hands find my hips pushing me away ever so slightly so that he can see me.
His eyes graze the expanse of my bare body and I’m suddenly frustrated by the fact that I’m the only one laid bare in the room. 
“My wife,” he says, kissing my lips, pulling me closer. “My, beautiful, beautiful wife.” he kisses me again, smiling like he can’t help it. 
I try to speak but he deepens the kiss once more, robbing me of words as he uses his body to overpower me with sheer force. His hands find my arse, giving it a squeeze before lifting my feet off the ground and tossing me onto our bed. 
In a turn of events, my eyes wander the expanse of his body. Toned from years and years of training. His eyes sparkle with amusement and suddenly I feel like a sitting duck awaiting his mouth on me once more. 
He falls onto the bed, hovering over me as he places yet another kiss on my lips. I use his imbalance to knee his hips towards the bed, my body weight pinning him beneath me as his eyes look up to me with pure lust. Large hands dance up my sides as if to encourage any next move I might make. 
“My handsome, cunning, silver tongued husband,” I smirk, placing a kiss on his bare chest. My mouth trails over his chest, to his shoulders, and his collar bones. Needing every part of him on my lips. It isn’t until I get to his neck that he lets loose a groan and flips us back over. 
“While I enjoy the sight of you pleasuring yourself on my cock wife, I shall be the one to take you tonight,” he smirks, biting my neck hard, no doubt trying to leave his mark there. 
“Oh Lu,” I breathe, feeling my  body come alive over his lips and wandering hands. 
My eyes shoot open as I feel his breath hovering over my sex, the warmth causing my blood to burn. 
“What a lucky male a I am to be able to taste this sweet cunt whenever I please,” he smiled mischievously before licking a stripe up my center.
I let out a breathy moan as he continues to lick and suck every inch of me. His hands parting my thighs warm and hard as he circles my clit with his tongue. My fingers thread through his hair pulling him impossibly close, earning a groan from him that reverberates through me. 
“Like fucking honeysuckle,” he moans before trailing more kisses up my body. 
I slink down moving towards where his cock peeks out of his untied breeches. Needing to feel the weight of him in my mouth, needing to hear the whimpers of pleasure on his tongue but he stops me. 
“No not tonight,” he fusses pushing me back down into the mattress. 
“But Lu-”
“No buts” he interrupts. “I want to pleasure my new wife tonight. Let me have that,” he moans silencing any protest I might have with a kiss as he slides home. 
The all consuming feeling of being taken by him as me gasping for breath as my back arches off the bed. My tits rising towards his mouth and he easily grasps a hardened nipple between his lips, sucking eagerly. 
“Lucien,” I breathe feeling him all around me.
“I love you,” he rasped, thrusting deeper. “My wife I love you.” he grunted watching where he slammed into me with intensity. 
My hand came to cup his face bringing his eyes to mine. My fingers trace the scar over his golden eye as I see the emotion flood his russet colored eye. “I love you too, husband,” I whisper to him. 
A gleam finds his eyes and he drives into me harder, the sound of skin slapping reverberating throughout the room. It was as if me uttering his new title spurred him on. 
We’re a tangled mess of sweat slick limbs and ragged breaths as I feel him deeper and deeper inside of me. My nails scraping his back, trying to find purchase or something to anchor me as pleasure rips through my body. His pants become whimpers as I feel myself tightening around him. 
“Always so perfectly tight,” he curses, driving through my tight heat. 
His words are enough to have me falling apart under him, my legs shaking from pleasure as I cry his name. 
“Lucien oh gods!” I cry, my hands no doubt leaving marks in his skin. 
“That’s right my love, cum for me,” he groans before sputtering himself. “Fuck,” he mutters before I feel him burry his seed deep inside me. 
His whimpers fill the space between my neck and shoulder as he finishes inside me. Once he’s spent he rolls over taking me with him so I’m cuddled into his side. 
“I’m so unbelievably happy,” he whispers into the world, still coming down from his high. 
“I’m told that’s often a side effect of an orgasm,” I laugh running a hand up and down his chest, soothing him.  
“No,” he says breathlessly, turning so that he is hovering over me once more. “I’m unbelievably happy because of you. You have not only given me your love, but you’ve given me a house, and a family. I never thought I would have those things. You are… you are everything and I promise to be the most amazing husband I can be.” he smiles, pressing a kiss to my brow. 
“You already are,” I smile, pulling him into another heated kiss. 
It would undoubtedly be like this for many years to come. However long the Cauldron allowed me  to live, I knew I would always have a place here, with Lucien. And maybe things didn’t go as I had always planned, but gods was I happy, and more importantly I was loved. 
Lucien Vanserra chose me, not because I was his mate, or because the world told him to. No, he chose me because he loved me, even when it wasn’t convenient for him, and I chose him too. I would choose him until the end of my days. 
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Epilogue: Five Years Later
“Careful my darling,” Lucien fussed, helping to lower me down onto a sofa. 
“Lu I’m pregnant not fatally injured,” I laugh waving him away as I rest my hands on my ever growing bump. 
“Of course, pregnancy is a walk in the park, I’ll remember that next time you beat me for serving you chocolate pancakes instead of blueberry,” he chides, pulling a blanket over my lap. “I spend a year telling myself you like blueberries and this little one comes along and all of the sudden you want chocolate.” 
“Pregnancy cravings are no joke my friend,” Rhysand laughs from the adjacent couch. “I find it best to satisfy your wife’s cravings as soon as possible before she asks for another ridiculous request.” 
“Especially when one’s wife is a princess,” Lucien teases, pressing a kiss to my temple.
“You married me!” I protest.
“And I thank the Cauldron every day that I did,” Lucien smiles, pressing a kiss to my lips finally.
(do we need an Az version now?)
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babyleostuff · 1 day
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. . . praising the pu for the “spell” MV
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[ 🧚🏼 ] wen junhui
wants to run and hide. the way you practically melted while watching the MV, the way your eyes stayed glued to the screen, how you seemed to light up whenever he came on - IT’S JUST A MUSIC VIDEO WHY ARE YOU BEING LIKE THAT. jun knows he’s good at what he’s doing, he hears that from random people all of the time, but watching you, the person he cares the most about, freak out over something as simple as a MV… it truly makes him feel so appreciated. you don’t even have to say anything, jun knows exactly how proud of him you are just by looking at your face.
[ 🧚🏼 ] kwon soonyoung
one would think hoshi would get all cocky after hearing you fawn over him, the makeup, the outfits, EVERYTHING. but no. like, for some reason whenever people praise him for his work he gets this rush of confidence, because he knows he’s hot, and looks good, but when it’s your turn to praise him, soonyoung’s reaction is all but that. he gets low key shy, and doesn’t really know what to say or do, because did you really enjoy it that much? did he really look that good in that outfit? you’re not making fun of him, right? being praised by the person you love the most just hits different.
[ 🧚🏼 ] xu minghao
„yeah, i knew you’d love it.” man is cocky, and his ego skyrockets, as if you don’t freak out over the smallest things he does on a daily basis. and he loves that - he loves how your jaw is on the floor after watching the MV like it’s the biggest masterpiece known to mankind. how you’re not able to form a coherent sentence because all you can say is „what the fuck.” how you’re looking back and forth between your computer screen and him. but he’s also a certified softy, so when you go on a rant about how beautiful, and talented he is, hao just quietly sits there, and soaks up every word like a sponge.
[ 🧚🏼 ] lee chan
okay so - chan knew he looked fucking amazing, that the makeup was perfect, and outfits cunty, and he knew you’d go crazy over the MV, like you always did, but it didn’t change the fact that throughout the whole time that you were watching the video he was nervously looking at you to see your reaction. he wants to make you proud, and he wants to show you the best side of him, thus seeing your reaction really mattered to him. and yes, he anticipated the yells, and a bunch of incoherent words (chan always found it so endearing how excited you got over the MVs), but he didn’t anticipate how it’d make him feel. the way you looked at him, the way your face screamed “i’m so proud of you” - nothing could ever beat that.
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Text
Bucky treating you like a princess when you’re on your period
Pairings: Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader
Summary: Bucky takes care of you when you’re on your period.
Warnings: Fluff, language, Bucky being the best boyfriend ever, periods, crying, hugs and kisses, cuddling, pet names
Written on my phone. I’m sorry for any mistakes.
Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier
GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators. I found it on Pinterest.
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Bucky heard a whiny groan come from the bathroom. He knows that groan. That’s the noise you make when you get your period. He watched as you walked out of the bathroom and got back in bed with tears brimming your eyes. Bucky wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer to him.
“Is it your time of the month?” Bucky asks softly.
You nodded your head and sniffled. He pulled you onto his lap and rubbed your back with his vibranium hand.
“How about I go get us something to eat, ok?” He says.
“Yes please.” You say quietly, loud enough for him to hear.
Bucky kissed your lips softly and gently maneuvered you to lay on the bed. He covered you up with a blanket and kissed your forehead, making you giggle.
“Get some rest, doll. I’ll be home in a little bit.” He says softly.
You watched as Bucky grabbed his keys and wallet before drifting off to sleep. Your nap was short lived when you woke up to a bad cramp in your lower abdomen. You whimpered at the pain and slowly sat up. You went in the bathroom and rummaged through the medicine cabinet for aspirin, but couldn’t find any. You whined and went back to yours and Bucky’s bedroom. You seen one of Bucky’s shirts on the floor. You picked it up and changed out of the shirt you’re wearing and put on Bucky’s shirt. You smiled to yourself, smelling Bucky’s scent on it.
You walked out of the bedroom and went to the kitchen for some water. You made yourself comfortable on the couch and scrolled through Netflix. You found your favorite movie and played it. You fell asleep about halfway through it. Bucky came home around the same time. He put the grocery bags in the kitchen before going to the bedroom, thinking you were in there, but you weren’t. Bucky frowned and went to the living room, hearing soft snores coming from the couch. He smiled when he seen you. He paused your movie and sat down next to you on the couch. He noticed tears on your face and you mumbling something in your sleep.
“Doll, wake up. You’re dreaming.” Bucky says softly, gently shaking you.
You jumped and sat up, immediately throwing yourself in Bucky’s arms and started crying. He pulled you onto his lap and rubbed your back to soothe you.
“You’re ok, babydoll.” He coos. “Do you want to tell me what happened in your dream?” He says.
“You left me cause you didn’t love me anymore.” You tell him.
Bucky gently cupped your cheeks, getting you to look him in the eye.
“I want you to listen to me when I say this.” He starts. “I love you with all of my heart, babydoll. You’re the love of my life. I’m never going to leave you.” He says.
“Promise?” You asked with a pout.
“I promise.” He almost whispers.
Bucky kissed you with so much passion. He made you feel like you were the only girl in the world in that moment.
“I love you so much, doll.” He says.
“I love you more, Bucky.” You say with a smile.
Bucky played your movie while he held you on his lap. You weren’t really paying attention to the movie. You got distracted with Bucky’s dog tags.
“Do you want to see what I got at the store?” Bucky asks, breaking the silence.
“Yes please.” You say.
You got off of Bucky’s lap and stood up. Bucky took your hand in his, leading you to the kitchen. You watched as Bucky took everything out of the plastic bags, showing you what he bought. Your emotions got the best of you and you started tearing up.
“What’s wrong, my sweet doll?” Bucky asks with concern in his voice.
“I feel like a shitty girlfriend.” You say.
“No you’re not.” He says.
“Yes I am.” Tears rolled down your cheeks. “I didn’t realize you love me this much.” You say.
“I always confess my love to you. You know that.” He says, hugging you.
After a moment, Bucky wiped your tears away and you looked at what he bought with a smile on your face.
“You always treat me like a princess.” You say, looking up at him.
“That’s because you’re my princess.” He says, softly pecking your lips.
“I thought I was your doll.” You say with a playful pout.
“You are. You’re my princess doll.” He says, smiling down at you.
You giggled and stood on your tippy toes to kiss him.
“Can we cuddle and watch movies while we eat what you bought?” You asked.
“Of course we can, babydoll.” He says, kissing you once more.
You and Bucky got the snacks and went back to the living room to watch movies. When you’re on your period and when you’re not, Bucky always treats you like a princess.
🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵
-Bucky’s Doll
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monstersflashlight · 3 days
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Hello! I love all of your stories. I binged them today lol your stories give me a ton of inspiration. I'd love to see your take on a minotaur x fem!reader in a college dorm shower room setting with the minotaur being in heat hehe. Or a vampire x fem!reader where the Vampire killed a mailman and delivers a "special package" in his place (reader ordered a sex toy? Maybe? Lol)
Hi! Sorry for the delay of this answer, adult life sucks real bad. I love both of your ideas, so I’m writing one now and the other one I save for a soon-ish future, hope you don’t mind me “stealing” it. So, hope you enjoy this and thanks for your kind words. It means a lot! <3
Special delivery
Vampire x fem!reader || sex toys, vampire compulsion, dub-con || tw: stalking, blood, murder
You are in the middle of cleaning the house when the doorbell rings. “One sec!” You ran to the door not worrying too much about your looks. It’s probably just the mailman. He’s an old dude who likes to look at your cat more than he likes to look at you, anyway. Which very valid, because your cat is a precious baby who deserves to be looked at.
But today it’s not your usual mailman. “Uh, hi? Where’s Ed?” You ask as you inevitably stare at the newcomer. He’s so fucking tall, build like a fucking mountain, too. You lament your choice of ratty shirt and ugly leggings as soon as you open the door. He’s fucking handsome, and you look like a rag. His hand is extended in your direction and a big box is being pushed into your hands.
“He won’t be able to make deliveries anytime soon.” The wording of that statement seems weird to you, but you don’t pay too much attention as you take the package. It’s probably just your new toy.
“How come?” You ask, not really caring but knowing it’s the polite thing to say.
“He’s… feeling a bit dry.” He chuckles at his own words and the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. A weird feeling creeping up your spine. You are about to close the door when he stops you. “Could you… Could you offer me a glass of water? I’m thirsty and forgot my bottle.” He explains. Your eyes met his, and you feel something inside of you twist and switch, like when a key unlocks a door. It’s the weirdest feeling you’ve ever experienced, but it fills you with a sense of calm so deep you feel high on it. Not even weed got you so tranquil and relaxed.
“Yeah, sure, come on in.” You say as he sighs and enters, smiling like a madman. You walk to the kitchen slowly, your extremities heavy. His heavy footsteps following close behind you, a bit too close. You think you hear him sniffing the air, but that couldn’t be. Everything smells like cleaning products, or at least you hope so.
“So what did you order?” He asks behind you. You realize the package is still in your hands.
“Oh, this. Just a new sex toy.” You answer, not really sure why you tell him the truth or why does he even care. But you feel compelled to tell him the truth. He chuckles at your answer and you think he says something along the lines of something has to fill that little human pussy, but you aren’t sure. You offer him a glass of water and he drinks it slowly, his eyes traveling down your body, your skin on fire. You start fanning yourself, too hot. What is happening to you?
“You are such a pretty human.” He tells you next, setting the glass down and approaching you. You stand there, frozen in place. His eyes are so deep, so compelling.
“Open the package, princess. Let’s see what you order to fill your precious cunt.” He tells you. You follow his instructions, showing him the bright purple tentacle dildo you ordered a couple days ago.
“Look at that… Someone has a pervy side. Do you want to fuck a monster, princess?” He asks, voice deep. He steps into your personal space, his chest pressed to yours. You crank your neck up to look at his eyes, breathing hard. He’s smiling, and there’s something about his smile that doesn’t feel right, but you can’t pinpoint what it is.
“What?” You ask, your brain spinning, completely confused. What did he say? What were you talking about? You feel dizzy, like your body is too hot and your skin is too tight.
“I’ve been observing you, princess. You always dance around when you clean. And you always wear almost nothing around your house. Your nipples are always visible under your clothes and it drives me insane.” He says as he takes your shirt off, exposing your bare tits to his hungry eyes. You should be scandalized to have a stranger staring at your tits, but you are just grateful for the cold air hitting your scolding skin. “I wanted to do this for so long.” He says as he launches at you and closes his hot mouth over your nipple, making you groan.
Your panties are instantly wet. You don’t know what’s happening to you, but his mouth feels so good. You grab a fistful of his hair and pull his head against your torso harder, making him chuckle and bite you lightly. You groan, arching your back, trying to get him even closer. “I need… I need…” You try to say, but your brain is empty, you can just feel his presence and your lust, your body completely out of control.
“I know, princess. I know.” He picks you up and sets you down on the counter, opening your legs wide as he rips your leggings and your panties, a big hole right over your pussy. The cold air feels great against your burning center. You whine. “I’m so thirsty… I need to drink. Would you let me, princess? Would you let me drink from you?” You look up at him, confused about what he’s asking, didn’t you give him water just a few moments ago? But then your brain snaps into place, and you register what is wrong with his face. His fangs are way too big, his eyes way too bright.
“What are you?” You ask, already knowing the answer.
“You know what I am, princess.” He whispers against your neck, his fangs pressing intensely against your jugular, not breaking the skin just yet.
“A vampire.” You whisper. A flash of Twilight crosses your mind, making you giggle as he looks at you expectantly. You move your neck to the side, giving him more space to suck on your neck. You don’t know why, but you want him to do it. To feed from you. “Bite me, please.” You beg.
He doesn’t wait any longer. He sinks his fangs into your neck and sucks hard. You didn’t know what you were expecting, but the sudden wave of pleasure wasn’t it. It crashes over you like a tidal wave and makes your pussy gush, forming a pool of juices under your ass. His fingers find your clit next, rubbing it as if he could read your thoughts. You move your hips against his hand, as he keeps pulling the blood out of you.
And then, there’s something pressing inside of you. You can’t look down to see what it its, but when it starts to breach into you, you realize it’s textured. He grabbed your new dildo and he’s going to fuck you with it as he drinks off you. Good lord, you shouldn’t be getting hot, you should be scared and frightened, but you are so horny you want to climb him like a tree. You need to cum like you need air.
“More, please.” You plead. And he gives it to you. He starts a punishing pace fucking you with the dildo. Your pussy so wet it makes filthy sounds against your gaping hole. He keeps fucking the dildo into you as you rapidly ascend into what feels like a storm building inside of you. And then it hits. The biggest orgasm you’ve ever felt crashes over you and makes you black out for a second, just to come back and still be coming. The pleasure is so big you trash against his arms, he holds you tighter, sucking more blood. The sensations are too much, too raw, and you love it.
You don’t feel when he retracts his fangs from your neck, but his tongue is hot and wet against the punctures and the dildo in your pussy is rapidly replaced by a very hard dick. He pushes into you in one hard thrust, grabbing your hips and manhandling you until you are suspended in the air. His arms are your only supports as he fucks your body onto his dick, hard and fast, forcing screams out of you every time he hits your G-spot. You feel weightless, wave after wave of pleasure hitting your body and leaving you limp against his hold.
You come again around his dick, taking him with you. The feel of his seed inside of you makes your insides twist with a new wave of arousal. You grab his hair and kiss him roughly, tasting your blood on his lips. He keeps fucking you until you’ve come so many times you can’t count, and when he gets his second orgasm, he fucks his cum right into you again, overflowing your used hole.
You are exhausted, almost falling asleep against him when he says: “Well, now I don’t feel that bad about killing your mailman.” He chuckles against your hair, kissing your head tenderly, his dick still nested deep inside of you.
“You what?!”
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marauroon · 2 days
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can u please write a fic about James and the reader being bestfriends and becoming lovers pls?
thats my favorite trope ever ♡♡♡
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COMMONALITY — J.POTTER
you and james were sometimes a little too close as friends, and it was beginning to make james question the platonicness of your relationship.
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cw — james feeling guilty for having feelings, mild miscommunication, friends to lovers, happy ending
james potter x fem!reader || fluff || 3.2k || masterlist!!
a/n — i love james so much man
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James had been… off lately.
You weren’t sure that anyone else would even be able to tell, he was still his outrageously confident self, outgoing and charming, playfully annoying, but there was something there that was different, and you weren’t sure if it was in a positive way.
He looked more tired than usual, more drained, the small glint in his eyes barely holding on under whatever nimbus cloud had managed to overtake the inside of his head.
“Hey,”You approach him gently, taking a seat beside him on one of the common room sofas with your legs curled up underneath you. “You okay?”
“Yeah I’m great, did you hear that we kicked Slytherin’s ass during our practice match this morning?” Deflection. You could practically feel it radiating off of him. Even his tone was laced with it, the usual excitement that would be present over something like that simply acting as a mask to cover whatever was underneath it.
“James,” You furrow your eyebrows ever so slightly and he can tell that he’s beat.
“I hate how well you know me sometimes…” And just like that any sense of trying to hide the sorrowful state he was in disappears, replaced with a genuine show of discontent as he leans his head over the back of the seat.
You sigh, leaving your hand on his knee to rub small circles against the skin exposed by has shorts. “What’s wrong Jamie? You’ve been off all week,”
“It’s nothing you can help with love don’t worry about it,”
“I’m going to worry about it,”
“I know,” James gives out a long exhale, dragging the palm of his hand underneath his glasses to rub at his eyes. “I’m really fine, though,”
“James,” You tilt your head with a small pool of worry in your eyes. “Please tell me what’s going on,”
He always hated it when you looked at him like that.
“It’s truly nothing for you to worry your pretty little head about okay?” He pulls himself to sit up straight, mirroring your head tilt with his own. “I’ve gotta figure it out in my own time,”
You didn’t want to pry. If he wanted to tell you then he would. All you could really do was wait.
“Alright…”
That didn’t mean you were happy about it.
“Love…” James sighs softly. “Don’t look like that,”
“I’m just worried about you…”
“I know,” James leaves his hand on top of yours as a show of thanks for your concern over him.
He wants to tell you. And he should really. But how on earth do you bring up that you’ve managed to fall in love with your best friend, to said best friend?
‘Hey, by the way, I know we’re like best mates and all but every time you touch me I feel like I’m going to explode.’
“You should at least get some sleep, you look tired,”
Yeah, it’s kind of hard to sleep when you spend the whole night beating yourself up for being an absolute idiot.
“Yeah…”
You turn your hand until it’s palm up in his, curling your fingers around the back of his hand until they’re securely nestled together. “Maybe we should take a nap,”
He should say no. He’s not right to have you cuddled into his side with your head on his chest and your arms around his torso. It’s not fair on you for him to take advantage like that when you just see it as what’s essentially a sleepover between friends. Not when he’s thinking about you like he is.
“Yeah, I think I could use a nap right now…”
But when you look at him like that who is he to refuse you really?
James woke up with a groan, still groggy and covered in a thin film of sweat from the cocoon of heat that had developed underneath the quilt. He was supposed to sleep for an hour, maybe two if either of you were truly tired. But the sun had gone down and he could hear Peter’s snoring from across the room and Remus’ curtains were pulled and the sun definitely wasn’t coming up any time soon.
God knows he needed what he got though, he was starting to think he’d exhaust himself to the point of death.
As he shifted on the mattress, he was brought back to the both fortunate and unfortunate reality of the fact you we’re sleeping next to him, arm draped over his stomach with his arm underneath your head whist you slumbered away peacefully.
It took less than a few seconds for the tranquility of it to be ruined under the small voice in the back of his head that just had to ruin absolutely everything.
You were so pretty when you slept. Peaceful, unaware, like nothing could phase you under the blanket of rest you’d covered yourself with.
And it was making him feel so guilty. You were his friend, his best friend, and he was taking advantage of what you viewed to be a platonic relationship between two people because he just could not get his head right and stop thinking about you in a romantic fashion.
Was it really just platonic? He wasn’t sure anymore…
He stayed stationary for a few short moments, eyes gazing deftly over your sleep filled features and the feeling of your chest slowly rising and falling against his side until he was sure he couldn’t handle it anymore, and carefully slid his arm from underneath you so that he could move.
And then you shift, and he freezes.
Godric knows he didn’t need you waking up right now.
You don’t stir, thank his, but you do turn your body towards his in an unconscious effort to seek out the lost contact between the two of you.
James swears he almost melts at the sight.
“Just mates…” he whispers to himself, trying in vain to convince himself once more that the close relationship between the two of you was nothing more than pure platonic friendship.
There’s a sharp pang of guilt that pierces his heart as he carefully pries himself from you and watches as you try and chase after the contact in your sleep, but he knows that it’s for the best.
James takes one last quick glance at your sleeping figure before starting to quietly head towards the door, hoping and praying that you don’t wake up as he sneaks out of the dorm room.
You don’t for a good few minutes, but as the patch of heat that he’d left behind on the mattress turns cold, you find yourself blinking awake in the search of his absent warmth.
You don’t think much of his disappearance at first, he’d often get up to go to the bathroom or sneak off to the kitchens if he was hungry, but after ten—then fifteen—minutes of waiting, it’s more than clear that James didn’t have any intention of returning, so you quietly pad out of the boys’ dorm room to go in search of him.
It wasn’t very hard.
“James..?” You rub the corner of your eye with your knuckle as you descend the stairs to the main floor of the common room, where James was sat stationary on one of the sofas with his back to you. “Are you alright?”
The worry from earlier in the day immediately invades your mind again, and your eyebrows furrow in concern as you approach him, sleep slipping away with every step you take.
“Yeah,” He muttered in response to your question, not making any move to face you. “I’m fine.”
You don’t believe him. “Why did you disappear..?” You take a seat next to him almost hesitantly.
The dip in the sofa from your added weight is enough incentive for James to finally move, and shifts to accommodate you beside him.
“I just.. needed to clear my head a bit, that’s all.” he shrugged, eyes almost absent as the continue to stare blankly towards the fireplace. “I didn’t want to wake you up either, so I just came to come down here for a bit.”
You let out a soft exhale at his intonation, reaching out to smooth a curl of hair from his eye with your fingers. “Are you really sure you’re okay?”
There’s a smile, almost incomprehensible smile that etches it’s way on to James’ face at the gentle touch of your fingers, almost like a reflex, and just like a reflex the second he notices he’s doing it, it disappears.
“I’m fine I promise,” James gives a small sigh, nodding his head softly. “Just a lot going on in my head at the moment,” He continues to keep his gaze focused away from you, and it does not help in making you believe him. “What about you? You still look tired,”
“Yeah…” You tilt your head sideways until your temple is resting against James’ shoulder. “I’m okay…”
James is almost envious of how easily you lay your head on his shoulder, like it’s really no big deal.
As close friends, it shouldn’t be.
But it made his heart skip a beat and his throat dry up all the same.
He rested his arm over your shoulder cautiously, like his skin would burn at the contact, pads of his fingertips carefully sliding into the hair at your temple as he leaned his head back against the sofa with closed eyes in a failed attempt at looking relaxed.
“Come back to sleep?”
James bit his tongue.
In a way, his body wanted him to, as the comfort of you and the warmth of the bed were things that he craved at the moment.
His mind, however, was telling him differently. He couldn’t risk it. Not after the thoughts that he had been having.
“I can’t,” he responded softly.
“…Why not?” You blink up at him slowly, lifting your hand to trace arbitrary lines over his forearm to try and soothe whatever was rampaging his mind.
His mind was all over the place right now, but he couldn't allow himself to fall back into bed with you. Not when he was like this.
“I just can't,” he murmured for the second time, looking away from you once more.
“I can leave you to sleep by yourself,” You hand moves down towards his, giving it a small squeeze as you massage circles into his palm. “If that’s why you can’t sleep,”
You didn’t want to assume that you were the reason for his discomfort, but you also didn’t want him to stick it out if that was the case for your sake.
James sighed, his thoughts telling him to just give in and agree, as his body still wanted and craved your close presence.
His mind, however, had decided otherwise.
“It's not that-” He began to say, before stopping himself to redirect his response. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course James,” You bring your head up from his shoulder to give him a nod. “ Anything,”
James hung his head with a sigh, breathing in deeply before committing to his question.
“Have you ever wondered what it would be like if the two of us were… more than just friends?”
“I’m—” You blink non-commitaly. “—not sure what you mean,”
James looked over at you, your furrowed brow causing confusion in him for a second.
Did you really not know what he’d meant?
Or were you just feigning ignorance?
“You know very well what I mean,” he said softly, his mind beginning to wonder if maybe you weren’t as clueless as you were portraying right now. “You’ve had those thoughts before, haven’t you? About us being more than just… mates?”
“I—” What to say truly evades you as you stammer for a response, and you can’t even formulate a coherent sentence as you blink blankly at him.
James felt his breath falter a little bit at your hesitation, making him second guess what he’d just said and regret it almost immediately.
Was his mind just making him think of things that weren’t real? You really didn’t have any sort of thoughts like that whatsoever?
None?
None at all?
James decided to take a gamble with his next statement, praying to whatever god was listening that it would pay off.
“It’s been something I’ve thought about a lot lately…” He muttered his confession, trying to gauge if you were thinking the same things as him, or if he really was just going mad.
“…really?” Your voice is barely a whisper as you respond, throat drying up to the point where you feel like you’ve forgotten how to breathe.
“Yeah,” he confirmed, his voice a little bit more confident than it had been initially. “And, maybe it started off as just a little ‘what if’, but.. I can’t seem to get the thoughts out of my head anymore…” he trailed off slightly, hoping you would catch on to what he was hinting at.
“James…”
You’re not entirely sure how you should respond to that.
And not even because it was something you didn’t want to hear.
You’d just managed to dig yourself into such a deep pit of denial that you’d never even considered James having feelings for you that were anything more than platonic.
“…I’m not crazy for thinking about us like that…” He whispered, his voice catching just slightly as he waited for your response. “…am I?”
Your eyes flicker over James’ features as you dig through the folds of your brain to form a coherent response. But nothing comes.
And the longer you stay silent the more the hope in James’ eyes disappears and the more to have the indescribable urge to kiss all of his worries away.
So you do.
Incredibly impulsively.
The skin of his cheeks is soft underneath your palms as you pull your faces together, the curls covering his forehead brushing against you and the soft pressure of his lips against yours almost indescribable.
James’ eyes widen before they close, and you can almost physically feel all of the anxiety drain from him as he anchors his hands at your sides to return your efforts.
And for a moment it felt like everything was right with the world. Just how it should be.
“I think I might be in love with you…” You mutter the words against James’ lips only once you part for air, hands trembling ever so slightly against his cheeks as you rest your forehead against his in a mix of adrenaline and nervousness.
James swears his heart physically flips in his chest.
He takes a moment to respond, his head spinning from the kiss between you two.
“Good… because I’ve been in love with you for so goddamn long already…” he mumbled, brushing his thumb over your cheek.
The breathlessness of his voice urges a soft laugh from the back of your throat, and James can’t help but smile at the sound, like it’s his favourite thing to hear in the world.
James leans in close to you like you’re the most delicate thing in the world, gently pressing his lips to your forehead and just relishing in the fact that you’d both finally just admitted your true feelings. “So, does this mean we're not just mates anymore?” he teased, giving your waist a gentle squeeze.
“I don’t think we’ve been ‘just mates’ for a while James—” You lean your head into the crook of James’ neck with your arms over his shoulders in a hug, hiding yourself in the wake of your mild embarrassment.
James smiled and wrapped his arms around your waist, hugging you against him. “I’m so in love with you…” he whispered, the warmth that had been absent from his heart finally returning.
His heart felt lighter than it ever did before, and the warmth filled him from head to toe.
He leaned in close to you, holding you tightly yet gently in his arms. “I adore you, you know… I’m yours.” he admitted softly in your ear, his fingers tracing gentle circles on your back.
“I’ve always been yours James…”
James couldn’t help but laugh softly at your reply, his heart swelling with love for you. “You’ve always been mine?” He teased, gently rubbing his nose against your cheek with a smile. “Even when we were ‘just mates’?”
You let out a short laugh at the way he nuzzles his face against yours, scrunching up slightly. “Maybe I was just being optimistic,”
“Optimistic that one day, I’d fall head over heels crazy in love with you?” he replied with a smirk on his face.
“It worked didn’t it?” You give another laugh as you move to cup James’ face in your hand, and he leans into your touch like it’s second nature.
“I suppose it did, didn’t it?” He took hold of one of your wrists, slowly guiding your hand over to his lips where he planted a soft kiss on your palm. "You’re so beautiful..."
It’s nothing you haven’t heard before from him, but with the added knowledge of his romantic intentions it feels so much more intimate, and it leaves you horribly flustered to the point where you’re sure he can tell.
And the look on his face tells you he definitely can.
He had always found you beautiful—from the way you styled your hair to how pretty you looked first thing on a sunday morning dragging yourself to breakfast.
But now that he knew you were his, and his alone, the thought of letting you know how gorgeous you were made his heart flutter.
He wanted to lavish the girl of his dreams with compliments and affection in every way he could.
“I think we should head back to bed. I’m feeling a little tired again,” James mumbled softly in your ear.
He wanted to take you back to bed and hold you in his arms whilst he slept. To Hold you without any of the guilt or second-guessing. To hold you properly, like he’d always wanted to.
“Yeah, I think that’s a good idea...”
James slowly released his grasp on you, taking a moment to admire just how gorgeous you were in the pale moonlight of the common room.
He took your hand in his, pressing a soft kiss to your knuckles as he stood up from the sofa. “Come on,” he whispered, gently pulling you up from your seat, “Let’s get some sleep love,”
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dunmeshistash · 3 days
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It might be a few years until we get to the ending of dunmeshi in the anime but 🥲 I think about it often than Laios' ending is kind of bittersweet. Never full, never able to see monsters in person, having to be a King when thats never been something he's strived for or wanted... I feel a bit sad for him, and Its beyond the story but I wonder if he ever gains peace with all those consequences. Of course he has duties now as a king, but I wonder if theres some depression there given his hunger and lack of monsters. He has his friends at least who've grown to really care about him 🙏
It is bittersweet but I think that bitter sweetness makes the ending great, Dungeon Meshi has a very ideal happy ending that could almost come of as a little "deux ex machina" with everything being resolved, nobody dying and a bright future in front of them.
But in the end SOMEONE had to make a sacrifice to save them, and that someone was Laios, at first it seems like a comic relief moment for the comedy monster eating story that his greatest wish was to be near monsters, but the more you think about it the sadder it is. So there was something to be paid for the happiness of the other characters and I think Laios is great for having sacrificed his desire for his friends.
I'm not sure if you've read the Kensuke Monster Tidbits but I think that one pretty much tells us how Laios is coping with his new situation
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In this he comes to therms with his reality, even if it's sad he must leave behind what he truly desired/loved, it was a risk he took to save humanity and he was willing to pay for it.
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And he did find something new to dedicate himself to! Something he could still do in his current situation!
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In the end, for as sad as it is, I don't think he regrets his sacrifice
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dollypopup · 14 hours
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People don't give Penelope enough props for the absolute BRAVERY it took in asking Colin for a kiss!!! I am tired of the rancid takes of 'oh, it makes her look pathetic-' no. Penelope asking for that kiss is VITAL in her growth, and pivotal to Polin's love story. Some flowers for Colin, first, for having put in years of work into their relationship so that Penelope trusts Colin to the point where she would even dare to ask it of him, but flowers to Penelope for asking. She trusts him and she's familiar with him and she KNOWS she's safe with him, and she took a leap of faith. So much of Penelope's arc is hiding what she wants and who she is, melding into the shadows, putting on a front. She doesn't confide in much of ANYONE. Not even Eloise knew about her love for Colin, or her existence as Lady Whistledown. Penelope keeps so much close to the chest.
Which makes it such an amazing moment when she opens up with Colin. When she reveals what she desires, and when he responds with 'If you want this, I'll give it to you'. So in that scene, when she's heartbroken and sad, after she has written of her own humiliation in Lady Whistledown to circulate amongst the ton, adding her own name to her list of bullies, when she thinks she is well and firmly on the shelf, and Colin comes to check on her, and he won't allow her to think badly of herself, and he even goes so far as to bribe her maid to have a moment with her, she opens her heart up enough to ask him for what she wants.
And that is beautiful. It deserves props and recognition. To ask for what we want as women is radical, and I'm frankly sick and tired of people thinking she's 'pathetic' for it. Penelope is brave in this scene. She is brave and vulnerable and Colin is there to tell her that is okay. That it should be rewarded. That he will catch her and he is there and she is right to trust him. He is the safety net as she tumbles and steps into the unknown.
Penelope Featherington looked the man that she loves in the eye, and she asked him to kiss her. How many of us would have the iron spine necessary for that? Sure, maybe she thinks she's hit rock bottom, but she could have swallowed her truth as she so often did. She chose not to. Penelope Featherington, who only ever voiced her opinions on a page, anonymously, stood before him with nothing to protect her heart, bare-faced, and told Colin Bridgerton she wanted him to kiss her. That she wanted to be loved.
And he did. He did and it was lovely. It was a fantastic kiss, and in that moment, you can tell that she *was* loved. Is loved. He held her like she was starlight, precious, delicately grasping her chin, brushing her cheek; he pecked her once and then went in for more. That kiss had desire and longing and tenderness in it. It was gentle and wholehearted. It was them learning each other, the both of them flaying away another layer for the other to keep. Penelope asked him for what she wanted and she got it. And it was ultimately the catalyst for all her desires to come to fruition.
I feel like we as women are told we must be passive so often: don't be too loud, don't ask them out, don't look 'desperate'. But fuck that: Penelope is an active participant in her love story. She asks Colin for what she wants and he provides it for her eagerly. That kiss made him realize that what he felt for her was far more than just friendship, and it started with 'Would you kiss me, Colin?' and ended with him outrunning HORSES to catch up with Penelope so he could, on his knees, profess how much he wants her and how he can't stop dreaming of their kiss. She toppled that first domino. May we all be so courageous. May we all be so bold. May we all be so loved.
Penelope put her own love story into motion with that kiss. We should fucking applaud her.
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artists-ally · 3 days
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{Fake It Like You Love Me} Azriel x Reader x Xaden Riorson x Cassian
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*slowly creeps up from the depths of hell* Heeeeeeeey, glad you guys remember I still exist 😭😭 First off, THANK YOU for 600 followers. That's insane and I don't deserve you all so thank you so fucking much. SECONDDDD, here is another part of my Fuck Away The Pain series!! Sorry this has taken me so long to do, but I think you for your patience. As always, let me know what you think and feel free to drop a request if you have any!!! Enjoy! Title and series inspired by this song.
Part 1: {Show Me Where It Hurts} Part 2: {Dirty Little Curse} these do not need to be read in order to be enjoyed!
Word Count: 7,630
Warnings: Smut. Like... an alarming amount of smut. ACOTAR x FOURTH WING, Dom/Sub, MMMF, use of the nicknames "pet" and "sir", oral (M and F receiving), pet play, degrading, praise kink, choking, spanking, cum eating, unprotected sex.
Tagging: @lees-chaotic-brain @thelov3lybookworm @needylilgal022 @librafairy @cyrygher @agent-anna @blessthepizzaman @bubybubsters @highladyofterrasen7 @annabethgranger123 @acourtofbatboydreams @thatacotargirl @berryzxx @throneofsmut
Summary: It is just after the legendary snowball fight. Azriel, Cassian, Rhys and Xaden are in the sauna while you, Mor, and Feyre are inside the cabin. Once Rhys leaves, it seems that there is a vacant spot that needs to be filled.
~~~~~
“So, explain this to me again?”
“Every year, they have a snowball fight. They just keep going and going and going until there’s a winner,” Feyre explains. “This is the first time you and Xaden are here so I think they’re taking it easy.”
From off to the side of the cabin, we hear a shout and then a chorus of laughter. 
“Maybe not,” Mor says, peeking out the window. “Cassian just decked Riorson in the face.”
I giggled, sipping my warm tea and curling my legs under myself. “Probably made fun of Cassian’s hair or something. Called him a wet dog.”
“You know damn well that animal will come in here and shake like one too.”
“And after the sauna? Yuck, it’s going to smell for ages in here,” Mor shakes her head.
“The sauna?”
Both of them stop dead in their tracks, exchanging a knowing glance. Feyre looks at me with a twisted smirk. “You don’t know about the sauna?”
“Should I be afraid?” 
“Definitely,” Mor grins, setting down her cup. “After they get done, they all go into the sauna together.”
“Naked?” I dare to ask.
“Terribly so,” Feyre adds. “A few years ago, on my first trip to the cabin, I got Rhys kicked out because… well, he just couldn’t stop thinking of me.”
I damn near choked. Then I burst out laughing. I can imagine it. Rhys, Azriel and Cassian sitting in the sauna together. It must be some sort of rule they have. If one of them gets a little too hot and bothered, they’re out. But the thought of them all in there, Azriel and Xaden sweating… does some pretty magical things to my brain.
And the space between my thighs.
“Gods you are just as bad as they are, Yn,” Mor fake gags, coming to sit next to me. “Don’t get too excited. None of us have ever been in, and none of us ever will.”
“Really? That’s kind of shocking, honestly.” There hasn’t been one exception? “I know Cassian is a bit of a…”
“Male whore?” Mor fills in the blank. It makes me giggle. 
“I don’t quite know everyone well enough to make those assumptions, but Cassian definitely gives off a certain… aura.”
“Oh please, he’d take it as a compliment,” Mor smiles, playing with some of my loose hair. “But no, not even him. Now, what I cannot believe is how you ended up with both Az and Riorson. That is truly a work of art.”
I can’t help the smile that blooms onto my face. “Some are just more blessed than others.”
Feyre barks a laugh, “I’ll say. You got lucky with those two, you know.”
“I know. We’re not like– together together, but they take very good care of me. I honestly kind of like it. It's all the best parts of a relationship without having to worry about if everyone is getting enough attention. They give me what I need, and I give them what they need.”
“Have you ever asked for more? To be in a real relationship?” Mor asks, curiosity getting the best of her. Feyre smacks her in the shoulder. “Ow!”
“Don’t be insensitive,” the High Lady reprimands. 
“Don’t be silly,” I wave them off. “I’ve thought about it, but I don’t think that’s what I want. Sure, being in love is great and all, but why complicate it? We work flawlessly together right now, why change? If either of them brings it up, I’ll be open to the idea. But for right now I’m thriving. They are far too generous anyway. They constantly bring me gifts or invite me out to dinner. They’re doing enough for me. Far more than enough.” “Not to mention the world's best sex,” Mor wiggled her eyebrows at me. “What’s it like with the two of them? Are the rumors of the Illyrian true? What about Xaden, is he packing too? Gods I bet he is, isn’t he? Now, I am the last Fae in Prythian who’d want to be taken by two males, but… for the both of them? I might reconsider. Tell me, does Az-”
“Cauldron boil me,” Feyre sighs. “I’m getting a drink.”
“Ooh! Will you bring me-”
“No,” Feyre scolds, heading into the kitchen.
“Crony bitch.”
“I heard that!” Feyre shouts from the other room. 
Mor and I share a laugh, snuggling in close together. “This is so fun.”
“Isn’t it?” Mor says, “You’re always welcome back, Yn. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen Az so relaxed. He looks… happy. And I can’t vouch for Riorson but he looks like he needs this too.”
“Yeah it’s been a stressful couple weeks for Xaden. There was a huge issue in his homeland and he nearly lost his life. His dragon is bonded to someone else in his squad, and her dragon almost died. It was scary. I’m just glad he’s okay. On the flight up here he was giving me all his strategies on how he was going to win.” There’s a loud cackle from outside and the sound of bodies running into each other. I looked over the back of the couch, seeing Xaden at the bottom of the pile, snow being shoveled into his face. “Guess they didn’t work so well.”
“They’re probably done now,” Mor explains.
“Sauna time?”
“Sauna time.”
The door opens and the four males clamber in, shaking snow from their hair and clothes. 
“I’m gonna get you back for that Rhys,” Xaden grins, evil intent behind those onyx eyes. 
“I’d like to see you try. Hey Mor, hi Yn. Where’s Feyre?” Rhys pats the top of Mor’s head, offering me a kind smile. 
“In the kitchen!” She calls, the High Lord following the sound of her voice. 
Cassian makes a b-line for the couch, shaking his head like a mutt. Mor squeals, I just shut my eyes and take the damage. When I open them, he snickers and sits on the floor, sighing loudly. “And that makes 181 wins for yours truly.”
“Then he must have cheated,” Mor gags, wiping off Cassian’s grime with the bottom of her shirt. “For fucks sake Cass you stink.”
“I’m a hard working male,” he begs to differ.
“Only thing you’re working is gonna be my foot in your ass,” Mor chides, standing up. “I’m going to shower, I smell like a dog.”
“You wish you smelled as good as me. Sorry to catch you in the crossfire, Yn.”
“It’s all good,” I smile, rubbing the few drops I got off on my sleeve. 
But the look on Xaden’s face when he comes to sit next to me reflects anything but. He’s got a scowl directed at Cassian, but he makes quick work of masking it, planting a kiss on my cheek. A moment later, Azriel does the same thing. 
“Should you be sitting on the couch?” I ask. Xaden’s hair a soaking wet mess, his clothes more the same. 
“Trust me,” Azriel chimes in, “There have been far worse things on this couch.”
I blink at him, wondering if I would need to burn my clothes after this. He plops down next to me, slinging an arm over the back of the couch behind my shoulders. 
Cassian looks between all three of us. Clearly seeing the size difference and taking notes about it. “I should probably keep my mouth shut.”
“That would be wise, brother,” Azriel grumbles, stretching out his legs. “Where's Rhys? Im fucking freezing and I wanna go in the sauna.”
“He’s in the kitchen with Feyre,” Mor said, rounding the corner from the washroom. She clearly didn’t shower, but she smelled much better. “And we all know what happened the last time the two of them were left alone here.”
“What happened?” Xaden and I asked at the same time. 
“Nothing,” Azriel, Cassian and Mor responded in unison. 
The dragon rider and I shared a look, a silent promise to ask Az about it later. We had a nice evening planned, dinner with everyone, and then they were going to let Az, Xaden and I spend the night in the cabin. We’ve never been here before today so it was a generous offer. I can tell how much this place means to all of them. 
No one needs a vivid imagination to get an idea of what’s going to happen later. 
“Fuck him,” Cassian pushes to his feet, binding his hair back with a strip of leather. “Come on, let's get started. He can decide later if he wants to join.”
Cassian and Xaden head out the door, but Az stays seated next to me. “Having fun?”
“Of course,” I reassured, patting his thigh. “Mor and Feyre are very kind. And this is a lovely cabin.”
“Good, I’m glad.”
“Looks like you two had a lot of fun,” I smile, resting my cheek on his damp shoulder. “You smell far better than Cassian.”
“Naturally,” Az smirked. “And yes we did. Xaden needed it, you needed it. It’s always just been the three of us every year, but it felt right to have Xaden here in the mix. You too, obviously.”
“Glad I could make the cut,” I joked, receiving a pinch on my ear. 
“Brat.”
“That’s not even close to me being a brat and you know it.” “Don’t I ever,” he grinned, covering my mouth with his. Despite the chill coming from his body, his lips were warm and soft. Full of life, vibrance, and need. “By the sound of it, Rhys won’t be joining us in the sauna. We won’t be in there long, will you bring us some towels around four?”
I looked at the analog on the wall, the hands reading 3:22pm. I nodded, “Sure.”
He curled my hair around his fingers before standing, following the other two outside. 
In the meantime, I hung out with Mor and we talked about random stuff. She tried to get more details about Az and Xaden, but I wasn’t willing to give them up. We played a few card games, had a snack and a glass of wine before she winnowed off the mountain and back to Velaris to meet some friends at Rita’s. 
Just as I was curling up with a book, I felt a cool whisper circle my wrist. A strand of Azriel’s shadow wrapped around and around in a never ending bracelet. I smiled, looking at the clock. Just seven past four. I head for the closet, grabbing three thick, soft tan towels. 
Damn, it's cold out here. How do they not freeze to death? I carefully step in their footsteps so my toes don’t get frozen off. There is a little stone path to the sauna and I gladly jump from stone to stone. With the towels under my arm, I knock on the door. 
“I brought your towels, they’ll be out here on this chest,” I shouted, unsure if they’d be able to hear me through the thick wood paneling. There was a small jut out from the roof over the door, ensuring they wouldn’t get covered with snow.
“Will you bring them in?” Xaden calls.
I skidded to a halt, damn near knocking myself over. Did he just say what I think he said? “I thought no females were allowed in the sauna?” 
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Cassian’s voice boomed. “We just need the towels so our bits don’t freeze off. You can close your eyes if you’re scared.”
Scared? I wasn’t scared, but I didn’t particularly care to see Cassian sprawled out with all his glory on display. Well, okay that's a complete lie. Ever since I first saw the Lord of Bloodshed, I thought he was… well… hot. He’s tall, all thick muscle and confidence. He knows he’s hot shit. I’d imagine if he were a closer friend that confidence might piss me off, but I think he’s funny. He knows what he’s got and he’s not afraid to show it. 
“Are you going to bring them or not?” Xaden shouts.
Oh. Right. The towels. 
I take a steadying breath and push open the door. A wave of humid, damp air blasts me in the face, instantly melting the flecks of snow on my hair and lashes. There isn’t a light save for a few windows to let some ventilation in. It's dark, but I can make out the three figures. Azriel and Xaden are to the left, and Cassian is to the right. 
I keep my eyes on my boys and place towels in Xadens open arms. “Thank you, my dear.”
“Of course,” I smile, carefully avoiding any glimpses of Cassian in my peripherals. Just before I can reach the safety of the outdoors, Azriel’s hand wraps around my wrist, gently tugging me in front of him. His other hand curls around my hip, pinning me still. “Yes, my shadow?”
He all but purrs at the nickname. “Stay.”
Stay. Stay? As in… in here? With him and Xaden and Cassian? “You guys enjoy your time together.”
I tried to take another step, but he sat up, gripping my body to keep it positioned between his powerful legs. I trailed my eyes down his torso, seeing a bit of a surprise waiting for me. “I told you to stay.”
Heat flooded my body, a different heat than the one coursing through the sauna. I quickly glance at Xaden to see him exchanging a glance with Cassian across the way.
“I- I wouldn’t want to kick Cassian out just because you want me, Az. That’s rude,” I say, my breath hitching when he slides his hands under my thick wool sweater. He rakes his nails down my back and I momentarily forget that there is a third set of eyes watching. 
“I don’t think Cassian would mind the show, would you, Cass?” Azriel looks around my torso at the Illyrian, and I have to force myself not to do the same. 
There isn’t a verbal response from him. 
Az roughly grips my hips, forcing me to sit down in his lap. His mouth attaches to mine before I can make a sound. I flinch momentarily when he bites down on my lip, his pace fast and aggressive. The sauna is silent save for the sound of our lips meeting. 
Sweat begins to swell around my hairline, trickling down the back of my neck. He removes my sweater and tosses it towards the open door. I wasn’t wearing a bra, and the hot air coats my bare back. Azriel breaks the kiss, latching onto my neck and collar bone. 
“Az,” I say, already breathless. “Wh-What are you doing?”
“Are you telling me that you’ve never thought about Cassian before?”
Shit. SHIT.
“I- well I didn’t- not in the way you think I would’ve I was just-”
“That certainly didn’t sound like a no, Yn,” Azriel looks up at me, a knowing glint in his eye. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice?”
“I- I didn’t think… I would’ve never thought that-”
“You have five seconds to tell me to stop. One.”
“Azriel I-”
“Two.” He pushes me back to my feet. 
My knees buckle and it’s an effort to keep myself upright in the sweltering humidity. “Why would I have thought that you and Xaden would want-”
“Three.” He stands, towering over me.
I huff in annoyance. “Azriel, stop counting-”
“Four.” Az makes me take two steps back, advancing on me.
“Xaden will you please fucking-”
“Five.” His fingers wrap around my throat and push me back. Directly into Cassian. A second set of hands find their way onto my body. Cassian grips my hips, keeping me from falling. I am deathly still. I hardly breathe. I don’t dare make a noise. “You’d like it if Cassian joined, wouldn’t you?”
I don’t respond. 
“She looks petrified,” Xaden points out very matter-of-factly. 
“I like it when she’s scared, she obeys when she is. Isn’t that right pet?” 
One word. One stupid nickname and I’m under his spell. Fuck, of course I want Cassian to join. I haven’t ever seen him without clothes, but he doesn’t leave much to the imagination. “I- I umm-”
“Just admit it and I’ll let you go,” Azriel demands, tightening his fingers for emphasis. It’s nowhere near a dangerous amount, but it makes my breath hitch.
“Yes yes,” I rush out, senses on fire. 
“Yes what, pet? Come on, you know the rules. If you want Cass to join you have to tell him.”
Azriel releases me, and if it weren’t for Cassian holding me up, I would’ve keeled over. The combination of the restricted airflow and the density of the heat in the sauna was going to make a lethal combo. 
And I craved it. 
I quickly slipped under, fully ready to play with the three of them. I gently turn and look down at Cassian. His bronze skin is shining with sweat, hair still bound behind his head. I take a deep breath, swallowing. “Would you like to play with us, Cassian?”
His eyes dilate, tongue darting out of his mouth to wet his lips. “I thought you’d never ask, darling.”
Relief floods me and I smile. I am so thrilled he said yes. I look over at Az and Xaden, waiting for their command. I desperately need them to tell me what to do. This is already so overwhelming in the best way possible. 
“Why don’t you be a good girl and welcome Cassian, okay?”
I don’t need to be told twice. Like he knows what I was thinking, his knees spread apart, inviting me in. I sink down to the floor and stare up at him through my wet lashes. “Messy or clean?”
A grin spreads across the Illyrians mouth. “Oh, she’s good. Messy, darling. I want to see you ruined.”
Cassian’s finger separated my lips and I sucked on his thumb. He pressed down on my tongue, and I swirled it around his digit. Meanwhile, his other hand fisted himself, and I couldn’t help but take a glance. 
Cauldron boil me alive–
I delicately reach a hand out and replace mine with his. The warrior's head falls back and he shuts his eyes. My hand is so much smaller than… well, every part of him. I stroke up and down, gently thumbing the small slit at the tip. A few drops slide down onto my finger and I generously lick them off. He definitely tastes similar to Az, but nothing like Xaden. 
The moment my tongue circles him, he cuts loose a moan deep from his chest. 
“Fuck you’re so warm,” Cassian lifts his head, taking in the sight of me taking him in. I swallow around him, drawing more sounds out of him. 
“I think what makes it so good is she loves doing it. Don’t you, Yn? You love being stuffed full,” Azriel comes up behind me, his presence stealing my breath away. Maybe it’s the added heat that makes my head dizzy. “That’s right, work him all the way down. Get him nice and deep.”
I push and push my head all the way down his cock, taking a moment to stay still, just emphasizing exactly what I can do. Cassian laughs at me, full on laughs. A mocking sort of sound that spreads goosebumps all across my skin. He bucks his hips, really testing how far he can push me. 
“Oh, she’s good,” he grunts, head tipping back again. “Keep that perfect mouth moving, darling.”
My ears are ringing a little. Whether that be from the heat or the sheer overstimulation, it’s hard to tell, but I didn’t react right away. The next thing I knew, one of Azriel’s hands was fisting my hair, the other braced at the back of my head. I nearly choked when I was ripped away and then slammed down onto his cock a few times. 
“You heard him, Yn. Take his cock like the good slut you are,” Azriel reprimanded. He continued to overpower me, making me work up and down on Cassian. I let my jaw go slack, along with my hands braced on Cassian’s thighs. I let out a content sigh as I was fucked on Cassian’s cock. 
I rocked with Azriels movements. His grip singed my scalp and an ache formed in my jaw. It was familiar, ignorable, but present nonetheless. I was glad to have them doing all the work, it was far too hot in here to think clearly… even without the added exertion.
When Az decided I got the memo, he let go of my head and I continued the motions with steady practice. I closed my eyes, feeling every drop of sweat on my body. My thick, fleece lined leggings were beginning to soak through. Xaden’s calloused hands found their way to my waste and began to slide them off. With a pop, I pulled off of Cassian, giving my jaw a much needed break. Xaden peeled them from my legs, taking my underwear with them. But, before he let me sit back down, he laid down on his back, beckoning me to ease on top of him. 
“Surely you’ll suffocate, it’s already unbearably hot in here,” I huff, catching my breath. 
“Then I shall go doing what I love most,” the dragon rider replies. “Sit.”
I looked to Az, silently asking if this really was a smart decision. He just gave me a pointed nod with narrow eyes, a promise that if I didn’t listen he’d make working for my release miserable. So I obeyed without a second thought. 
The moment his tongue curled into me, I sighed. Aimlessly, my hand worked tentatively up and down Cassian’s shaft, drawing a few sounds out of the General. “Let me fuck your throat, darling.”
There must’ve been a sparkle in my eye because I grinned, opening wide for him to do so. His length was thick. Almost too thick. And long. Fucks sake everything about him was big. I was up for the challenge. As it hit the back of my throat, I relaxed, letting his hands fall around my ears. It was gentle at first, his thrusts long and even. I moaned in tandem with the licks I was receiving from Xaden, my mind a melted, scrambled mess of ecstasy. With a particularly hard suck on my clit, I jerked the opposite way Cassian was going.
“Ah ah ah,” he chided, clicking his tongue. “You don’t get to run away from me. Take what you’ve been given. Be a good fucking girl, Yn.”
I glance up at him, throat too full to make any noise. A third set of hands– Azriels, so experienced and commanding, settled on my breasts, plucking and pulling. I could feel everything and nothing at the same time. My entire body was numb with pleasure, numb with exploration of the three of them. 
Azriel. Xaden. Cassian. All three of them, the most powerful warriors of their respective worlds, all focused on one thing. One goal. 
Me. 
Cassian picked up his pace, the thrusts less deep, but far more firm. It was clear he was chasing his high, thick veins beginning to bulge in his arms… up his chest… in the column of his throat. 
“She does such a good job at taking it,” Cassian praises. “Doesn’t gag, doesn’t complain. Look at all those pretty tears. All for me, darling? Do I fuck you so good you need to cry? It’s okay, I’ll lick them clean. Then make them spill down your neck again when I get to fuck your pussy.”
My heart thrashed in my chest, thighs shaking with the force of Xaden’s tongue against my core. I writhed my hips, breathing harshly through my nose every other thrust because that’s all Cass would allow. At some point Azriel’s hands left the mix. I couldn’t see him anywhere, but his presence remained. Those shadows replacing his skilled fingers. 
My body was wound tight. I was already anticipating a fun night with just Azriel and Xaden. But now? With Cassian? A new fire had been set ablaze inside me. And it needed– no, demanded, to be let out. I tried to warn Xaden, I tried to ask for permission, but I couldn’t with Cassian’s grip on my head. I fiercely moaned, hips shaking so badly that Xaden had to lock me in place. 
“You can let go,” Azriel commanded from somewhere behind me. I silently thanked him. 
Like a crack of lightning, my release barreled through me. I came so hard my vision whited out, a faint ringing bounding between my ears. Moans of pure pleasure spilled out of me and right onto Cassian. The extra vibrations must’ve done wonders from him because his grip faltered, as well as his pace. His head slumped forward and his eyes rolled shut. 
“Fuuuuck, whatever you’re doing to her, Riorson, you better not fucking stop. Keep her moaning like that. Fuck I’m gonna cum so hard. Want it, pretty pet? Want my cum down your throat, filling your belly?”
He released my head, bidding me to give a verbal answer. After what Xaden just did to me, I’m not sure that’s physically possible. “P-Please, sir” I sigh out, my voice in an atrocious state already. “Wanna make you feel so so good.”
The use of ‘sir’ must’ve really done something to him. He sat up, a corrupt, unforgiving smile creeping onto his cruel lips. “Sir? That’s a dangerous game, my darling.”
“She doesn’t mind a little bit of danger, does she?” Azriel grips my hair again, pulling my head back so I have to look up at him. I nod carefully, the strain in my neck almost too much. “Yes she does. Now get to it, I'm getting impatient.”
Bad things happen when Azriel is left uncared for. And who was I to make him suffer?
I stuck out my tongue, a silent beg for Cassian to slip back in. He did without further coercion. The first time my nose brushed the soft hair on his pelvis, I could’ve sworn it was an accident. The second time, I realized it wasn’t. I couldn’t breathe, a small panic settling in every crevice of my body. I tried to keep calm, but between a relentless Xaden under me and a ruthless Cassian in front, it was near impossible. 
“F-Fuck fuck fuck fuuuucccckkkk,” Cassian shouted, the muscles in his thighs and abdomen flexing. “Gonna take it all? It’s gonna be a lot, can you handle it, darling? Yeah I think you can. I’ll make you either way. Stay niiiiice and still for me- oh fuck-”
At the last second, he pulls me off about an inch and the humid, sweat filled scent of air floods into my nose. I drink his release down. It’s thick and warm, salty and abundant. I hum around him as I swallow and swallow and swallow. My eyes fill with tears yet again and they escape down my cheeks. 
Cassian shudders. With gentle laps of my tongue, I clean him up. He watches me attentively. I can’t help the smile that forms on my lips when our eyes meet. 
“You…” he breathes heavily, chest swelling and falling. “You are a little devil, aren’t you?”
The Illyrians hand wraps around my throat and he pulls me to my feet, and off of Xaden. The way our tongues met could’ve moved mountains. He was not shy in showing how much he wanted me. I melted into him, straddling his thigh and letting my arms drop to my sides. 
Azriel played with my hair, hands caressing my ass. Together, they brought me down, content to let me relax for a few minutes. 
“You did so well, pet,” Azriel cooed, dragging his tongue over the shell of my ear.
“So fucking good,” Cassian murmured against my lips. “Such a good little girl.”
I could hear Xaden climb to his feet, the sound of his hand stroking his cock loud in the otherwise quiet room. “I will never, ever, get tired of making her cum on my tongue.”
“Should I have a taste?” Cassian asked, placing small bites on my throat. 
��I actually had something else in mind,” I sighed out, getting lost in all the hands and tongues. He gave me a curious look, but I just smirked, easing onto shaking legs and turning around so my ass was in Cassian’s lap. “I want to play a game.”
“A game?” There is an obvious hint of danger in Cassian’s voice? “What kind of game?”
“I want you and Xaden to fuck me, and I want Azriel to tell you when to move and when to stop.”
I haven’t yet brought it up to Azriel and Xaden, but I’ve always wanted to do this. A game of red light green light. To give full control and power to him, making us work for our pleasure. I look at Azriel, gauging his response, but he just grabs my chin, bringing our faces level. 
“Yeah? You wanna play a game? Want to be treated like a literal pet? Taking commands and performing tricks?” His voice is thick with desire, so low only we could hear it. 
My heart skips a beat. I hadn’t thought about it like that before. But the idea is… it’s-
“Look at her face, Cass,” Xaden tilts his head mockingly. “She wants it so bad, don’t you, pretty girl? Would you like a collar, that way if you get lost they know who you fucking belong to? Gods she’s so red. Don’t be embarrassed, pet. We know just how much you love being fucked full of cock and cum.”
“Sit on his dick, Yn,” Azriel orders. “Now.”
Silently, I hover over his lap, letting Cassian guide my hips. At the first press of his tip, I gasp. A new thrill thrummed through me. 
Azriel comes and stands in front of me, cupping my cheeks. “I know he’s big, but you’re gonna take all of him. And you’re going to like it because you asked for it. So, here’s your first trick. Sit.” 
The Shadowsinger pushes on my shoulders, leaving no option but to take Cassian all the way. All. The. Way. My breath is lodged in my chest with no room to escape. I can’t think. Can’t hear. Can’t see. Can’t even begin to process what is about to happen. 
“Oh, good girl Yn,” Xaden praises, still stroking himself. “Look at how pretty she looks, Az.”
Cassian grunts behind me, hooking my legs over his knees so the others can see him buried inside me. I cry out at the shift, feeling him go deeper and deeper. Gods, he feels like he’s everywhere.
“Cassian, why don’t you play with her nipples,” Azriel instructs, walking back and forth in front of us. “Xaden, give her something to suck on.”
“With pleasure,” Xaden grins, those onyx eyes narrowing on my mouth. I go to protests, but then I realize just how hard he is. How flushed his skin is. And I need to taste it, to relieve him of his torture. 
He traces my lips with the tip, coating them in his slick. With a heady pant, I stick out my tongue to invite him in. 
A hand cracks down on my thigh. I scream out, more in shock than in actual pain. Azriel’s hand was the culprit. 
“Did I say you were allowed to taste it yet?” His eyes are swirling with lethality. I bite my tongue to keep myself from saying something stupid. “Well?”
“N-No,” I say meekly. “I’m sorry. May I taste it, Az? Can I please taste Xaden?”
After a minute of letting the question hang in the air, building suspense, he nods. Greedily, I take Xadens hips and bring his cock towards my mouth. 
It’s such a glorious sound to hear when Xaden curses low. A deep rumble in his chest letting me know this is exactly what he needed. Without moving– fearful I’ll get another smack– I look at Az, awaiting my next instruction. 
“Fuck her throat, Xaden,” Az says, eyes scanning out bodies. “Start fucking her nice and slow Cassian. Really savor her, make her moan just like Xaden did for you.”
At the same time, both of their bodies start sliding in and out of me. They find a rhythm instantly: Cassian fucks me forward onto Xaden, and Xaden fucks me back onto Cassian. It’s easy enough to let them do all the work, my bones and liquid at this point anyway. All I know is pain, pleasure, and unfiltered need for these males. 
I moan deeply as Cassian hits that spot inside me. Xadens hip stutter, his head tipping back as Cassian hits it over and over again. 
“Does that feel good, Xaden?” Azriel asks, gripping his hair at the root, whispering right in his ear. “To have our girls' mouths all around you?”
The dragon rider nods as best he can with Azriel’s grip. “Fuck yes.”
“Make her stop.”
“W-Why?”
“Because I told you to. Yn, stop,” Azriel demands. I instantly pull my mouth away from Xaden, even if it makes me want to scream and thrash and beg for it back. I need it, need to taste it, need to feel him cum down my throat. “See, she listens to me. Do I need to punish you too?”
“No,” Xaden shakes his head. “I’ll listen.”
“Yes you will.” Azriel gives a fake smile. “On your knees.”
Xaden sinks to his knees. 
“Suck on Yn’s clit. Make her cum on Cassian’s cock.”
The sight of Xaden, on his knees, cock leaking continuously, does something to me. It gives me ideas for later. He helps push open my legs, even when the first brush of his tongue makes me see stars. Cassian has to wind his arms around mine to keep me from sliding off. I know he’s strong, but to be able to hold me still and keep fucking me is…
“Good boy, Xaden,” Azriel praises, brushing his hair away from his face. “Just like that, make our pretty girl cum.”
It’s not going to take long. His laps are so soft, so gentle, and it works far faster than I’d like to admit. 
“Az- Az can I cum?” I ask, just to be cautious. I do not want to have this taken away from me. I can’t have it taken away from me. 
“Yes, pet. Cum as much as you want.”
It’s like music to my ears. It’s building and building. In my core, at the base of my spine. Behind my eyelids. It’s fucking everywhere. My vision goes white and an embarrassing noise tears from my soul. I writhe on Cassian, driving him further and further inside me. Sweat is dripping off me in buckets. Fuck it is so fucking hot in here.
“Very good Xaden,” Azriel says. “What a good boy, making our pet cum so well. You can stuff your cock back down her throat. She looked so sad to see it go. Go ahead and cum, fill her up nice and full. Cassian, get up.”
Suddenly I’m on my feet being steadied by several pairs of hands. The way Cassian is looking at me, the way he’s breathing, tells me I’m in trouble. The glances passed between Az and Cass worry me. The next thing I know I’m on my knees and elbows, ass up in the air.
“Sit on the floor, Xaden,” Azriel commands. “Right in front of Yn. Yup, there you go, now just let Cassian fuck her onto you.”
A shudder runs through my entire body when Cassian slips back in. I swiftly take Xaden down, mainly because if I don’t I’m going to go crazy. The delicious, sweet taste of him fills me once again and I hum in content. 
“Don’t hold back Cassian, chase exactly what you want. Fill up her pussy as much as you want, she can take it.”
“Fucking hell, Az. Are you trying to kill me?” Cassian chuckles, letting his motions pick up pace. Every snap of his body into mine sends waves of pleasure down my spine. It rolls through me and allows me to take even more of Xaden in my mouth. “I’ll never get over just how fucking tight she is.”
“Malek spare me…” Xaden curses. I get to watch Xaden fall apart and a new thrill fuels my motions. I lose all concept of time, I have no idea what is going on. All I know is Cass is fucking me like his life depends on it, and that Xaden is holding on for dear life. 
I suck as hard as I can, pressing my tongue into the bottom side of his cock. I can’t pay attention to the most sensitive areas of him, mainly because Cassian if fucking me too hard to let me. Hopefully I can make him see stars anyway. 
“F-Fuck Yn, I’m gonna cum,” he warns, knees falling open. “Oh fuck I’m gonna cum.”
“Give it to her, Xaden,” Azriel kneels beside Xaden, hand trailing over the muscles in his chest. 
I watch the muscles in his abdomen clench with every breath. He scrunches his eyes closed and I brace for him, letting his hips rut as fast as he wants. With a long, drawn out growl, Xaden releases down my throat. I do my best to swallow it all, but between the angle and Cassian's relentless thrusts, I let a few drops spill out. 
Xaden is throbbing on my tongue, his sounds of pure pleasure fill my ears, filling me with deep satisfaction. 
“Can’t fucking take it anymore,” Azriel rips me off of Xaden and takes his place. I’m hauled up onto my palms, Azriel’s cock bobbing in front of me. Before I can take it between my lips, Azriel bends down to my level, licking the droplets of Xadens cum off my lips. 
I went as still as a statue. Tingles spread from the tips of my fingers to my toes. I watched him swallow, his Adam's-apple bobbing. I was at a loss for words. If he wanted me to speak, it’d be impossible. 
Thankfully I didn’t have to. He filled my mouth, not wasting a second. 
“Xaden, will you go grab those towels?” Azriel asked, hands trailing over my shoulders. 
“When I can move,” he responded, making the Shadowsinger and the General laugh. I swore I could feel the rumble of his laughter through his cock. 
“Not gonna last much longer,” Cassian warns, adjusting his grip on my hips.
“Wait.” Azriel urges, “Give me one minute.”
Cassian stills, and I whine in discontent. A second later, his hand smacks my ass, undoubtedly leaving an imprint of his hand. “Don’t complain, pet. Or you won’t get anything at all. You should be grateful to be stuffed full of our cocks. That’s no way to disrespect a guest.”
Azriel is unforgiving as he fucks my throat, his pace fast and hard. To be fair, he has been waiting a long while for his turn. It doesn’t take long for him to start showing signs of nearing his high. He grabs both sides of my sweat-soaked head, and I feel drops from his own body–and Cassians–land on me. 
“Want my cum?” Azriel asks, pulling me off. “Want me to cum down your little throat, pet?”
“Yes yes yes,” I slur my words together. “Please gimme all of it, need all your cum. Wanna taste you so bad.”
“Yeah you fucking do,” Azriel’s grin is sinister. He knows exactly what to say to make me squirm. “Drink it all up, slut.”
When he finally gives me what I want, I don’t dare waste a drop. I leave no mess to clean up as he cums all the way down. There’s nothing I can do but swallow, swallow, swallow.
I begin to lose some consciousness, the heat and over exertion finally catching up to me. I feel Azriel slip out, praising me and telling me how good I did. I think I nod, but Cassian resumes his motion and I forget about everything. I can only focus on him pounding into my pussy, getting so deep I have to let out little noises every time he does. 
“She’s so fucked out,” Xaden says from… somewhere. 
“Yeah she is, she looks so good. Limp and used. So fucking hot, Yn,” Azriel agrees. 
I moan in response. It’s about all I’m capable of at this point. And it feels so good. Everything they did to me, every thrust from Cassian feels like I’m floating. I close my eyes and let him finish me. 
As Cassian lets go, I feel him pin my shoulders to the ground, ramming his hips as hard as he can into me, filling me up nice and tight full of his cum. There's a big stretch, and then an almost immediate release. His warm slick flows out from around him and down the inside of my thigh. Tears or exhaustion and pleasure streak down my cheeks and fall onto the wood floor of the sauna.
Eventually, I’m laid on my back. I can barely open my eyes, but I feel a tongue lapping between my legs. I try to inch away, but firm hands keep me from closing my legs. I whine. 
“Ah ah,” I hear Cassian chide. “He’s just trying to clean you up. Be still. Here, drink this.”
A cup is pressed to my lips and I hungrily drink down. The salty, briny taste is washed from my tongue and my blurry vision begins to steady. I look down, seeing Xaden between my legs, his curly head soaked with sweat. 
Cassian’s thumb brushes my cheek, collecting a small tear. “Aww, poor baby.” I watch as he licks it from his digit. It… gets me going faster than I’d like to admit. Then his tongue trails the length of my cheek. I shudder, letting out a tiny squeak. “Told you I’d lick them clean.”
“Alright that's enough, Xaden,” Azriel says from up above. “Let’s get her inside and cool off.”
“I just couldn’t help it, her pussy looked so good full of cum,” Xaden winks at me, and I can feel a flush of my cheeks and neck. “Even after all we’ve done together, I still make you blush.”
“Zip it,” I glared at him, failing to keep my smile at bay. 
Cassian lifts me up, hugging me close to his chest. We’re all covered in sweat, but I don’t give a fuck. I just want to take a nice bath, curl up with my boys, and sleep into next week. A cold burst of air greets me as we step outside the sauna. 
“Is she doing okay?” Azriel asks. I think it’s him that brushes hair away from my face. 
“Mhm,” Cassian responds, giving my body a squeeze. “She's gonna be alright?”
“Yeah,” Xaden added. “She always recovers really well. She’s not afraid to tell us what she needs. But by this point we know what she needs.”
“My only request is a bath.”
“See?” Xaden chuckles, then plants a kiss on my head. “Feeling okay? Not too lightheaded?”
I make a noise that sorta sounds like an ‘mhm’, but it kinda comes out as a garbled mess. All three of them give a laugh. 
“That was… more fun than I thought it was going to me,” Cassian sighed contently, padding down the hallway to one of the bedrooms. I'm set gently on the bed, propped up against Cassian. I am way too tired to open my eyes, but my ears track them all around the room. I can smell the soft lavender wafting from the bathroom. Hallelujah. 
“Yeah, I’m glad you joined,” Xaden agreed, his fingers beginning to braid sections of my hair. “We’re just waiting on the tub to fill up, pretty girl. Then we’ll get cleaned up and go to bed. You did such an amazing job, taking us all like that. And the game? We’re going to have some more fun with that, aren’t we?”
“Yes we are,” I nodded, peeking open my eyes to find them all huddled around me. Azriel smiles sweetly, cupping my face, stroking his thumb back and forth across my cheek. “Hi.”
“Hey,” he whispers. “Feeling better?”
“Yeah,” I nod, clenching my hands to get some of the tingling to go away. “It was so hot in there.” 
“We even turned down the heat before you got in there,” Xaden explained, tucking some hair behind my ear. “Did you have fun?”
“I always do, did you?” I asked, looking up at Cassian.
“In the beginning I was a little unsure but… now I’m hoping you’ll send word any time you wanna play again,” He grins, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. “You were unbelievable.”
“Isn’t she something else?” Azriel looks at me fondly. “Baths ready, want to be by yourself or do you want one of us in there with you? Or… well, I guess we all can fit if that's what you want.”
“Well I’m certainly not going to wash my own hair,” I grin.
They all share a look, smiles creeping onto their mouths. 
“I’ll get the shampoo,” Azriel winks.
“I call the conditioner,” Xaden stands, following Azriel into the bathroom. 
I can’t help but laugh. 
“Are they always like this?” Cassian watches as they root around in a cabinet, smelling the different bottles. 
“Yes, they’re too kind to me.”
“I think it’s well earned,” he smiles, helping me stand. “Come on, let's go.”
I let him lead me in, making sure I get a good look at his ass. Damn. just… damn.  
“I could ask Feyre to commission a painting, it’ll last longer,” he says cockily. 
I give it a smack. With a helping hand from Azriel, I sink into the tub, and let the water cool off my skin. I lean back, wondering how I got so damn lucky.
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tragedy-of-commons · 2 days
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dearly beloved
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sunday & gn!reader | wc: ~1.3k
Some birds were not meant to fly.
tags/warnings: SPOILERS FOR 2.2, implied/nongraphic animal death, childhood friends trope, kind of a character study, there is humor is you squint, romance is not the focus here
notes: the story quest had the gears turning and i have this to show for it! i honestly just wanted to yap. so. sunday's characterization is loose and i just had fun with this!
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Sitting on the windowsill is a cage fashioned from wrought iron. 
Inside Robin’s bedroom—the one you play in almost everyday—it’s a jarring new addition; the dull gray metalwork draws your eyes away from the scattered dolls and books resting upon the honey oak floors. Before your lips curl downwards, the shape inside of the cage catches your attention.
…A small bird chirps from inside.
“Robin!” you call out, hoping she’ll hear you from the hallway, “Since when did you get a pet bird? And is that a Charmony Dove?” She doesn’t come running in to answer, so you assume that she’s still held up with dinner. Making your way over, the little dove chirps at you.
It’s so pretty—and you would surely be scolded for gaping like a fish impolitely near any of the Oak Family—but Robin has never been a Judgey-Mc-Judger-Pants like all of those other stuffy adults. 
“So adorable…” You decide to stick your hand between the bars so you can pet the animal. Though it’s beautiful, you’re sure you’d be able to hear its song much better if it could be let out for some fresh air. 
An annoying voice decides to scare the ever-living shit out of you. “It is, right?” 
“F-Fuck! Sunday, you scared me!” you say hotly, jabbing an accusing finger to his chest. “Where is Robin? She doesn’t take joy in my suffering!”
He tries not to smile at your “crass” language—whatever that means. “Mr. Gopher Wood wanted her to continue her lessons instead of playing with you,” Sunday straightens his posture, “She made me come to tell you, so…”
“Are you kicking me out?” You narrow your eyes at him. “Because if you are, I didn’t even wanna be here anyway! Robin is better than yo—”
He facepalms like you’ve seen your mother do. “No, I’m not. I don’t think I could make you leave if I tried. But weren’t you wondering about the dove?”
Your scowl drops into an awed smile, forgetting the whole reason why you were upset. The bird shifts from foot to foot (talon to talon?) on its perch, looking at you with eyes that look like sparkling amethysts. “Yes! When did you guys adopt one? I’ve never seen a Charmony Dove here before.”
Sunday frowns, a serious one, you note. It looks out of place on his face that still matches the chubbiness of yours, but he’s always been the one to talk you out of shenanigans in your ragtag group. He seems older right now, standing like he’s ready to lead an entire lineage while he can barely preen his feathers by himself. 
“That’s because they normally don’t live here. Robin and m—Robin and I—found it outside in one of the gardens a week ago, sick and hurt,” he says, taking a spot at your side while you examine the bird with sympathy. “We decided to adopt it and nurse it back to health.”
“Poor thing…” It allows you to scratch under its neck, cooing affectionately under your touch. “At least it’s looking better. Robin must be so happy to have her own pet in her own room! Did she name it yet?”
Sunday frowns deeper, and he should really stop doing that, ‘cause he’ll get wrinkles. “No, she didn’t name it yet.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Robin… isn’t really happy about us adopting the dove.” Now that just doesn’t make sense! Robin loves animals, and you both once talked about adopting hundreds of them if you could. You’re about to open your mouth until Sunday adds on quickly, “She says birds are meant to fly in the sky.”
“I mean, she’s not wrong,” you survey the sturdy cage and how it dwarfs the inhabitant inside. “It looks like it’s in jail like Hanu from the cartoon.”
He flicks your forehead. “Be serious for once.”
“We’re eight!” you cry.
Sunday agrees to show you how to feed and hold the dove properly after you beg him, and the longer you hold fledgling life in your hands, the more cruel the cage seems. You don’t know if birds are meant to do this or that, but you know that their song is louder (and more annoying) when they chirp outside of your window.
Before you leave for the day, he also tells you that he and Robin plan to release the Charmony Dove when it fully recovers. A bittersweet notion that you think fits the siblings perfectly. If Robin is the sun that everyone’s eyes will be on, then Sunday must be the silent moon obscured by the curtain.
The moon lost its sun not long after. Robin’s departure from Penacony was also bittersweet, and you were left with one less friend. Not a week after she left, you found yourself in her empty bedroom, lonely. She did say that you were allowed inside anytime you wanted, and that you both would message everyday. Still, you missed her.
Something else is clearly missing too. The wrought iron cage that normally houses the Charmony Dove you’ve become familiar with is empty. You don’t think it could have escaped; the door to the enclosure is sealed with a solemn air. Sunday would naturally be taking care of the little thing, that much he told you, so where is it?
You get your answer after searching the winding halls for a short bit.
“...I didn’t mention this to you because I knew it would make you upset,” his brow is furrowed again, and you’d tease him for looking like an old man, but something is definitely wrong. “But the dove died a few days ago. It tried to fly, and when it did, it crashed.”
“That’s… what? I thought that you said it was healthy,” you supply, heart clenching.
“I’m sorry. It was, but I guess that some birds aren’t meant to fly.”
You don’t think you’re going to cry. “Why not? It looked perfectly healthy, so why shouldn’t it be able to fly like the others?”
Sunday laughs, “That’s a good question. It’s unfair, isn’t it? If we didn’t set it free, it’d be alive.” Somehow you get the feeling that Sunday isn’t feeling guilty, but instead something else. His eyes are set and intense, as if he’s not talking about a Charmony Dove, but something more than you can’t understand.
It is unfair. Birds are supposed to belong to the sky; that’s one of the first things you learn about them when you’re learning to speak your first words and take your first steps. 
You feel heavy. “I’m glad it, um, passed when it was free, at least.” Maybe he’s acting a bit more down because of Robin leaving—which does make sense. You feel far away from him.
Sunday grabs your hand tentatively. “I wish there didn’t have to be an ‘at least’.”
You squeeze back. “Maybe one day, there doesn’t have to be… does Robin know?”
(You’re too naïve to notice the look of resolve aging his features by the day.) Now he looks guilty—doing that thing where he shifts his weight from foot to foot, “I didn’t want to upset her either.”
It’s silent save for the shuffle of your feet as he leads you out of the room and outside into the familiar gardens. They’re beautiful, filled with freesias, roses, begonias, and even a few unkempt weeds growing in the little abandoned corners. You’d go as far as to call it your paradise.
The reason you’re here reveals itself: a stone marking a mound of dirt that is plainly a makeshift grave. “Is this…?”
Sunday nods, halo dipping in tandem with his head. “It is. Just like the cage, it also needed a place to rest. This time I, um, fashioned it,” he pauses, “But one day, like you said, hopefully there needn’t be an at least. I want to make a world where there isn’t one.”
That sounds bittersweet, you think, plucking a weed from the otherwise flawless grass and placing it on the pillow of earth. 
(You just hope that the boy beside you doesn’t lean too far in either direction.)
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taglist: @flower-yi, @moineauz, @nomazee
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kingtomura · 3 days
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Ashes to ashes
Summary: Even in the cold aftermath of the war, Tenko rests knowing he's not alone cw: tomura shigaraki x female reader, fix it fic, fluff, drabble, how its actually going to end tbh wc: 742
Everything is bright. 
It’s the first thing he could think of as he blinked his eyes open. The sluggish movements paired with the rhythmic beeping of a machine next to him made it all feel more jarring. 
Once the blurring of his vision cleared he had a better idea of his situation. 
He’s in the hospital. 
There is a window, a machine monitoring his vitals and
You. 
Your head is down as you sat by the side of his bed, the slow breathing of your form clueing him in on your current sleeping status. 
How long have you been here? At his side as he lie in a hospital bed for god knows how long? 
His heart — feeling new, feeling warm aches in ways that have nothing to do with the soreness of his other muscles. 
It makes him reach out to you, his hands are bandaged, but he knows decay no longer rests within him. He knows the quirk was destroyed along with his hatred, yet he still maintains a lifted finger as he pets the top of your resting head. 
Somehow you were so comfortable sleeping at an awkward angle — leaning over onto his bed as you sat next to him in your chair. 
It’s cute. 
You’re cute. 
He feels a smile pull at his features, it grows even bigger as you stir, waking to the disturbance. 
Your eyes are slow as they open and he can only feel himself relax as you look at him again. 
He thought he’d never see you again. 
“Tenko.” Your voice is soft, heavy with sleep as you speak and the words waver with the tears filling your eyes. “Thank god you’re awake.”
Yes, Tenko, no longer Tomura Shigaraki. It feels like a dream, but that part of him died with the end of the war. Only the embers of his true being remaining to be born again from the ashes. 
Your hand catches his and there is no fear in your movements. You are not afraid of him — you were never afraid of him. 
You’ve always loved him throughout it all. 
“How long have you been here?” He drags himself to ask, voice hoarse from lack of use and Tenko can see the way your shoulders shake as you struggle to answer — as you struggle to fight the tears. 
“It doesn’t matter.” Is your only response as you rise from your chair, knocking it back from the force of your movements as you race to wrap your arms around his neck in a hug. 
It’s tight and it presses on the bandages all over his body but he can’t bring himself to care. He’s just content with you being the first thing he sees as he came to. 
He doesn’t acknowledge your shaking sobs, knowing you would get on to him about calling you a crybaby. No, he allows you this moment, pulling you in closer and burying his nose into the crook of your neck. 
“I was so scared, Tenko,” you start, words breaking free from the confines of your mind, “I thought you were gone for good.”
He rubs soothing motions onto your back, pulling you in tighter. “I thought I was, too.”
The words only make you cry harder, the tears make his heart ache along with the pain throughout his body now. 
“I love you, I love you so much,” you murmur, and he knows. He’s always known. “Please don’t ever leave me again.”
Tenko pulls you back, forehead now resting against yours and — god, he knows you would hate to hear him say it, but he can’t help it. He thinks you’re cute in all forms, even when crying. 
“I,” he pauses and looks at you, really looks at you — and seeing his entire world in your eyes only brings the sting of unfamiliar tears. “I love you, too. I won’t leave your side again.”
He brings you in for a kiss, a gentle press of his lips against yours and you take all that you can, eyes closing and head tilting. 
Tenko pulls away and it’s brief only to mutter a firm, “I promise.”
Then he’s back, kissing you like his life depended on it. 
Even so close to you, he knows the warm tears trailing down his face were his own. The burn of them is unmistakable. Tenko can only bring himself to smile into the kiss, feeling anew. 
He can’t remember the last time he cried. 
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muniimyg · 2 days
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6: the madness // series m.list
note: say u missed me or else i’ll cry 🫵
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “aao” // DO NOT comment here or on the masterlist . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks !!!
🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @pamzn @defzcl @maryy1300 @whoa-jo @taetaecatboy @jksusawife @un06 @firesighgirl @rrosiitas @butterymin @parkinglot-nights @musicjournalsjdb @kissyfacekoo @jkslvsnella @vampcharxter @bloopkook @somehowukook @bbystarcandykoo
//
Timing.
You’ve never really understood it. Not to mention the whole invisible string theory and how implausible it seems… How is it that you can coexist with the love of your life for years and not be with them until the time is right?
Isn’t that strange?
Love is all-consuming, inevitable, and perfect, but its greatest weakness is a mere concept: time.
Speaking of time, you’re early.
As you enter the restaurant and greet your friends, you can’t help but check your phone every other minute. Waiting for a text from him, checking the time, and wondering when he’ll arrive… It feels exhausting to be in this state of longing.
How is it that you’ve been friends with him for so long and now you need him more than ever?
To hold you and tell you everything is alright.
To smile at you like you’re his favorite person in the entire world.
To just be with him.
Even if today wasn’t life or death, you felt so helpless. It felt like everything was against you.
Yes, it was just about a stupid presentation (that barely scratches the surface of your future), but it was still a tough thing to get through alone. It was unexpected and filled with minor mistakes, making it feel like a complete defeat.
So much happened.
First, you slept through your alarm.
Though you made it right on time, you didn’t have the extra moments to prepare and run through your presentation like you had originally planned.
Then, since there was no time for prep, you encountered technical difficulties. Your notes were missing for some reason…
And your stuttering!
God, you never stuttered so much in your life.
It was truly an off morning.
… And it doesn’t end there.
Nope!
As you texted Jungkook and updated him, you remembered that you had a rescheduled quiz to take… You know, the one that you completely forgot to review last night because your head was all over this stupid presentation.
The quiz went fine but it could’ve been better.
You know you could’ve done better.
That’s probably what annoys you the most. Everything that occurred today wasn’t up to your standard performance level. Humanizing it is difficult because the truth is simple…
Some days just aren’t good.
Some days you just have to take the L.
Some days you just need to breathe through.
And that’s okay.
Because after all the bad, losing, and catching-your-breath moments—there’s him.
The very thought of him eases you. Talking to him makes you feel like you’re bigger than the bad and the losing. Being with him is as easy as breathing.
“Hey ___,” an unfamiliar voice disrupts your thoughts. You turn your head to see who it is. Beside you, a tall man with a broad build offers you a smile. He has short hair and dimples. Even with just his appearance, he’s charming (you can’t deny that).
Politely, you return it but it’s obvious you’re confused.
“… I’m so sorry,” you feel slightly embarrassed to not remember his name. “You are?”
“Mingyu,” he introduces himself, stepping closer and offering his hand. You take it, shaking it slowly and unsure.
He tries again.
“I’m Jungkook’s friend,” Mingyu explains. “You’re Jungkook’s… Uh?”
“O-oh!” you avoid the question and redirect the conversation. “Are you in his friend group with Jaehyun and them?”
He scoffs. “By ‘them’ you mean those guys?”
Mingyu points to a group of tall guys hovering over the menu display. You count them and can’t help but laugh.
Then, you notice one.
“Is that DK? I think Jungkook introduced me to him when we were walking home a few weeks ago!” From where you are, you wave at DK. DK sees you from the corner of his eye and sends you a smile. He gestures for you to come over. For the second time, you smile politely and feel stuck.
What now?
“What’s Jungkook doing introducing you to DK and not me?” Mingyu chuckles, attempting to lighten the mood.
You purse your lips. “Ohh.. I get it.”
“Get what?”
“You’re cheeky,” you observe. “Yup… You’re definitely friends with Jungkook.”
Mingyu puts his hands up in surrender and then on your shoulders. “Guilty as charged.”
You laugh.
He likes your laugh. It’s soft and attractive—especially when you throw your head slightly back. Intrigued, he invites you to sit with them.
“You know the others, right? Hobi and them?”
“Yeah!” you answer him happily. “Hobi and I are actually pretty close—“
Mingyu’s puppy eyes light up with excitement. “Oh, shit really? So you don’t need to get to know them or anything?”
You blink at him.
“I guess?”
“Great!” Mingyu beams. “Good. Cool... Sit with me! I’ll introduce you to everyone.”
You know it’s all friendly nature.
Mingyu is known for being like this.
Goofy, a little deceptive, but a good guy overall. You have nothing to fear! Especially when he’s friends with Jungkook, right? He wouldn’t think of trying to flirt with you… Right?
What are you to Jungkook again?
Before you know it, Mingyu’s hands find yours. As he laces your fingers together, you feel your chest tighten.
This feels weird.
It feels like betrayal even though you know it’s not. Isn’t it ridiculous to be thinking this way?
You run excuses and options in your head.
Do you pull away and laugh it off? Do you just let him hold your hand and lead you to sit with him and the others? You aren’t sure… But the one thing that is clear is the look of annoyance on Jungkook’s face as he steps into the restaurant and his eyes land on your hands.
“Jungkook!”
As cinematic as it can be, that’s what it is. You shake Mingyu’s grasp off and rush to Jungkook. He’s completely taken aback, stumbling as you crash into him. A small laugh escapes his lips, as he finds your tiny charge at him to be the cutest thing you’ve done thus far. He barely walked in and you’re already in his arms.
Heaven, he thinks to himself.
As he wraps his arms around you, he kisses the top of your head. “Wow, look at you. Are you sure you’re my girl? Not shy anymore? Not avoiding me? I’m so proud of you, mi.”
He smells like him. Like his laundry detergent and his skin after his workout—a little sweaty but so addictive.
Is that weird?
Most importantly… Who cares?
He’s here.
You can breathe him in. You can breathe again.
You groan in embarrassment. Pulling away, you keep yourself close enough to rest your chin on his chest. He lowers his gaze at you, eyes softening as his lips curve into a pout.
“Bad day?”
“Better now,” you hum, hugging him tighter. He laughs and gently tickles your sides. Your laughter increases, causing you to let go of him. He takes your bag from your hands and swings it over his shoulder. His fingers brush against yours as you two walk to join your friends who go ahead and get seated.
“Hey, am I crazy or was Mingyu holding your hand—”
“___!” Mingyu calls for you.
You and Jungkook turn your heads and see him patting a place for you. Without a second thought, Jungkook lifts his hand to wave and you hold onto him tighter. Exchanging looks, he then proceeds to guide you towards his circle of friends and away from the ones you’re familiar with. Passing by Hobi, you give him a look.
A ‘help-me-get-out-of-this,’ look.
Hobi sticks his tongue out at you and mouths, “you’ll be fine, bitch.”
By the time you gather your thoughts, Jungkook has already introduced you to his other group of friends. You completely blank out as they respond and introduce themselves. It’s only for a few seconds and you already had an idea of who they all are anyway.
The campus calls them the 97 liners.
They’re known for being…
Boys.
Decent ones at that, but they’re definitely energetic. Amusing almost all the time, competitive and intimidating when they need to be. Through rumors and observations you’ve made from afar, it made sense to you where Jungkook gets his playfulness from.
He’s…
A lot like them.
He’s definitely himself. It’s interesting.
Mingyu scoots over, making enough room for you and Jungkook. He dabs Jungkook up, greeting him as warmly as he greeted you. The others continue their conversations, asking for your input every so often. You quickly realize how charismatic everyone is, and to be completely honest, it overwhelms you.
But with Jungkook beside you, it doesn’t feel like a bad thing. He squeezes your hand under the table every so often when he notices your gaze wander. It’s like he’s gravity to you.
“Okay, so we already ordered… But we can order again if there’s something specific ___ wants,” Mingyu says, rather bubbly. He clears his throat, reaches over the table, grabs the menu and offers it to you.
“Yah, yah, yah,” Jungkook sends a glare to Mingyu, yanking the menu from him. You turn to look at him and find that he doesn't look amused. His eyes are fixed at his friend. With an intimidating tone, he warns; “Mingyu, stop flexing.”
Mingyu shakes his head, not taking it seriously. Jungkook and him have always had a playful friendship anyways. “I don't know what you're talking about... I’m not flexing. ___, feel it! I swear I’m not flexing right now.”
Jungkook tightens his grip on your hands.
Taking a sip of your water, you take your time to swallow and gather your thoughts.
“Don’t you gym with Jungkook?”
Dumb question.
“I gym more than him,” Mingyu corrects you.
Wow.
Stupid answer.
You can't help it. A laugh escapes your lips. “Is that supposed to impress me?”
Jungkook lets out a hearty chuckle, liking the way you answer. He feels proud of you. He feels like he definitely chose the right girl.
Mingyu smirks, leaning back.
He thinks this is fun.
It is fun.
“Ehhh.. I mean, if you ever let me take you on a date, I’ll show you what it means to be impressed.”
Jungkook’s smile drops.
Yours does too.
You shift closer to Jungkook and avoid Mingyu's eyes.
“H-honestly, I’m not feeling picky tonight. I’m sure whatever you guys ordered will be delicious.”
The rest of the conversation is easygoing as everyone patiently waits for the food to arrive. Mingyu’s attention turns back to his friends, as he takes the hint from your avoidant eyes. To him, it was unserious.
Hopefully, it’s also whatever to you.
As the food arrives and is set on the table, Jungkook exchanges a few side comments and whispers context into your ear. You giggle and feel your heart race when he places his hand on your thigh.
“Jungkook…”
“Hm?”
“Your hand,” you warn.
“What about my hand?”
“It’s on my thigh.”
“I know,” he snickers. “Wish it was somewhere else.”
You gasp and can’t resist hitting his chest. He takes the hit like a man. He knows he deserves it.
On the table is a plate of shrimp. You pick one up with your chopsticks and begin to peel it. As Jungkook eats, you place the freshly peeled shrimp on top of his rice. He smiles at you brightly, his heart close to combusting.
“You didn’t have to—”
Jungkook’s words are cut off as you hear Mingyu whine, “Awh, no fair! Peel me one too, please!”
You nod and answer his request. Taking another shrimp and beginning to peel it, you then finish quickly and place it on top of his rice too.
Mingyu eats it happily.
Meanwhile, Jungkook’s chest tightens. Again, it’s such a minor thing to happen… Yet, it irks him so much. He’s no boy, though. This isn’t a perilla leaf tantrum—no, he was much too mature for that.
This was… Clarity.
In between bites, Mingyu brings up a fascinating topic.
“Why are you looking at her like that?” he blurts. Jungkook hadn’t even noticed he was looking at you a certain way. What was it? Was it too revealing of his feelings?
Wait… What even is he feeling?
There’s a sense of jealousy and frustration wrapped around the core of it all; his liking of you.
“I’m not looking at her in any way,” Jungkook responds, taking a sip of water. You continue to chew and look away.
“You totally are,” Mingyu laughs. “Hey, is it because you used to like her?”
Jungkook doesn’t miss a beat. “Where did you hear that?”
“Ohh.. So it’s not true, then?”
“Nah,” Jungkook scoffs. “I just don’t get why it’s a rumor and why it’s in the past tense. It’s true… I like her. She knows it too—wait, you fuck… Do you even read the group chat? I talk about her all the fucking time.”
Mingyu’s eyes light up.
“Oh my god!” he gasps, piecing everything together. “Shit, right. I remember now. God, why’d that take me so long to connect? Of course! This is ___. The ___! Ice skating bullshit, right? Pocky kiss or whatever?”
Your eyes widen as you turn to Jungkook. “You told them?”
Jungkook smiles innocently.
“I have the best kiss of my life and you expect me not to tell my boys?”
He has you there.
Mingyu laughs, murmuring about how down bad Jungkook is. When you feel your cheeks heat up, you quickly bury your face into your hands. You feel so embarrassed… But at the same time flattered.
It’s awful.
To make matters worse, the butterflies keep fluttering as Jungkook tilts his head and smirks at you. He finds your shyness the most precious thing in this entire world. The mere fact that he makes you feel and act like this?
Oh, it’s remarkable.
Jungkook can't help but compare your behavior from earlier to now. How you took initiative and ran into his arms as if they were your safe haven—and now there's this.
You like this, right now.
So utterly his without him much being done or said. It's an understanding. It's simply how it is.
He chuckles, as he wraps his arms around you and squeezes you into a tight hug.
“Ahh... You totally folded."
With his words, your eyes widen. You push him away and roll your eyes at him. He teases you, mocking the way you cling onto his body.
You huff but let him hold onto you. From here on out, you two keep it casual and continue your conversations with everyone. He piles food onto your plate and in exchange you bring the food to his mouth.
Jungkook eats happily.
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When the dinner is over, everyone goes their separate ways. 
Jungkook’s friends all hug you goodbye (Mingyu takes his sweet time) and leave him to walk you home. Hand in hand, you two wave goodbye and earn a few winks from Hobi. To that, you roll your eyes and brush it off. 
The walk with Jungkook is nice. 
The conversation between you two is so natural and good. You talk about the presentation mess up in more detail and he listens well. He empathizes with your feelings and understands. He’s so easy to talk to. He gets you. He makes you laugh even when what he’s saying isn’t funny. 
Is this how it’s like when you have feelings for someone? 
How embarrassing. 
When you two reach your front door, he looks at you longingly. 
“Feel better?” he asks you. You notice how gentle is tone is. How thoughtful.
“… About everything? The presentation and shit… Bebu, at the end of the day you did what you could. The grade your received is literally still an A—w-what”
Jungkook is startled. 
You grasp the fabric of his hoodie and pull him close. Without a second thought, you take a step closer to him and lean in. With urgency, you kiss him. 
Deep. 
Needy. 
Lovingly. 
His eyes flutter shut as you deepen the kiss with your tongue. He gives you way, parting his mouth open for you to explore and do as you please. As he kisses you back with the same kind of energy, you smile into the kiss. 
When you pull away, Jungkook is in disbelief. 
“... Now what?”
You clear your throat, feeling your lips tingling from the kiss. 
“S-sorry,” you gulp. “I d-don’t know what came over me… I just—”
“Why are you apologizing?” he blinks at you slowly. “I didn’t ask for an apology. I asked, now what?”
You tighten your lips. 
“Now? I… I just need some air.” 
Jungkook nods his head, eyebrows furrowed together. He understands you. 
Before you can open your mouth to defend or redirect, he beats you to it. 
“Yeah? Me too.”
Before you know it, he kisses you. 
Jungkook kisses you like a silent plea. Even though he has already confessed; this felt like another. 
The way he kisses you feels like a new language. He knows just when you kiss you more and when you to be delicate. He cups your jaw with the palm of his hand, tilting your head so he can kiss you better.
Which is so fucking weird… But it happens like never before.
He kisses you better.
Breaking away from the kiss, you two catch your breaths. As you do so, you clear your throat.
“Wanna come inside?” you ask, taking his hand.
He smirks, unable to stop himself. 
“Sure… But I’m gonna need some clarification on that offer… Come inside where?”
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In your dimly lit kitchen, you two make yourselves a cup of tea.
Jungkook multitasks by making passes—saying that the water is still cold since you’re hotter than it. He sneaks in a few kisses on your cheeks as you tell him he’s being stupid. You two laugh as he lifts you up to sit on your kitchen island. He makes himself comfortable in between your legs.
There, you caress his hair.
He is so handsome. You love the way his nose just fits his face… How round his eyes are and even the scar on his cheek. It’s so precious.
He’s perfect, you think to yourself.
As you get lost in your thoughts, Jungkook feels so much comfort and freedom with your touch. It feels like rest. For a moment, he shuts his eyes and takes in how much he loves your touch.
Breaking the silence, you tug on his hair. “You need a haircut.”
He shakes his head, eyes still closed.
“Literally got one two weeks ago.”
“Yeah,” you realize he’s right. He did cut his hair two weeks ago. He came over that night just to show it off. “... But I liked Mingyu’s hair! It was so short. I feel like it would suit you too.”
He opens one eye and gives you a weird look.
You mimic it.
“What?”
Jungkook lifts his face.
“So… Was it just me but I definitely caught Mingyu trying to shoot his shot with you, right?” He snickers, tilting his head as he recalls what he saw. "He literally asked you out."
You shrug, explaining Mingyu's attempt to hold your hand as a friendly gesture. "He’s just friendly, right? He also tried to hold my hand to lead me to the table and that was kinda… Unexpected? But he’s like that, right? He’s just friendly. Like a puppy! Golden retriever energy.”
"Maybe," Jungkook responds, his tone betraying a hint of uncertainty. "Y-yeah. I mean, the shrimp thing was worse."
You laugh softly. "What? This is about the shrimp thing? I peeled it for you too… And it’s not like I peeled his because I wanted to. He asked. It was lighthearted."
"I know that," he reassures you, his tone softening. "I’m not that insecure to pick a fight over peeling shrimp. You don’t have to convince me it was nothing. I know it was nothing.”
Confusion flashes across your face at his mixed signals. "Are you upset?"
"Maybe," he admits quietly.
Then he hesitates.
“Actually, I think I’m frustrated. I’m not mad. Sorry if I sounded aggressive—"
"N-no, it’s fine," you reassure him, gently cutting him off. "Why are you frustrated, bebu?"
Jungkook offers you a weak smile. "I don’t get it…"
"Get what?"
"All this shit and we’re still not together.”
Your brows furrow slightly in confusion.
Taken aback, you ask him, “what’s that supposed to mean?"
Gesturing between the two of you, Jungkook expresses his confusion. "This… I mean, what is this? We’re together, aren’t we?"
"Jungkook—"
"I’m just… I don’t get it. Even if you thought he was just being friendly, why didn’t you just say you were my girlfriend? Mingyu would’ve stopped flirting with you."
"So it’s my fault?" you huff, feeling offended at the pitch of this idea. "I thought your friends knew—"
"Well… Yes. I talk about you, and it’s not like I’m ditching parties to study in that stupid library—"
"Can you leave the library out of this?"
"Okay," he sighs, relenting. "Sorry… I just… They know how I feel about you. I guess they don’t know how you feel about me, and… I mean, did you tell him we were together or not? Because if I had to remind him who you were to me, I don’t think you told him that we—"
"Jungkook—"
"No, I’m being serious," he interrupts, his tone becoming more stern. "Why didn’t you just—"
"You never asked me out!" you interject, frustration evident in your voice.
Jungkook stares at you blankly, prompting you to continue. He runs everything back in his mind.
You were right.
With all these moments, he’s been so busy planning how to get reactions out of you and completely missed out on so many perfect opportunities.
“You never asked me to be your girlfriend. All you’ve been doing this entire time is trying to get me to flirt with you, kiss you, or trick me into dates… You want me to act like your girlfriend? Ask me to be. I’m not built for situationships… And honestly? I’ve been waiting—patiently and elegantly at that. There were so many times where I wanted to hold your hand and give in. You talk about how you’ll get me to fold or whatever—fine.”
You take a breath, caving in. “This is it. I’ve folded! God, do you even know how hard it is to study next to you in that stupid library because y-you… You give me butterflies.”
Jungkook reaches for you. You let him touch you but your heart stays still, fighting to get these feelings out. Your voice wavers with emotion.
“A-and it’s so… I don’t know how you do it. At some point, I set them free. Like, fine, okay! Fly high, my butterflies… But for what?"
There’s a sense of urgency that awakens in you. Never in your life have you ever felt the same way for anyone.
It feels like defeat and victory all at once.
It feels like peace and war all at once.
It feels like love.
Oh, the madness.
To love someone this wide and deep… To love someone at all. It is everything beyond you. How it radiates through your body and onto his lips… How everything unfolds and reveals him no matter what.
You can’t decide if the way you’ve fallen is utterly heartbreaking or romantic. Maybe it’s both.
Let’s say it’s both.
All you know is that with glossy eyes and a fragmented understanding of timing, you tell him;
“Jungkook, I set my butterflies free, and they flew to you."
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