#it’s not about being a shitty person. it’s about STAYING a shitty person

[midnightarcheress]

Simon thinks he could live like this.

pairing: bodyguard!ghost x actress!reader cw: nothing he's just down bad 7 | gold rush masterlist.

“are you insane?!” Daniel shouts, slamming the door behind him and stomping his feet towards Simon with a menacing look, “you think you can just move her around like this?”

“she wasn’t safe in that house, this is for her protection,” he answers promptly, crossing his arms and taking a step in front of you, covering your frame from the irate man. if he could, he’d land a punch on his face in no time, not caring that technically he’s his boss.

“yeah? and you simply have to be here with her, right?” he scoffs, rolling his eyes at him. you watch the scene unfold from behind Simon, brows knitted together and bottom lip nearly bleeding from biting too much. he’d managed to momentarily tranquillize you, bring you back to earth after the terrifying panic state, but the anxiety kept simmering underneath your skin, just waiting for another chance to take over your body.

“the shitty security system you put in her house wasn’t enough to prevent the bastard from intrudin’, the bloody alarm didn’t even go off,” he retorts, eyes shooting daggers straight ahead, “so yeah, i’m gonna stay with her for as long as it’s necessary. contract says to protect her, doesn’t it?” 

the two of them stay quiet, a silent staring competition on Daniel’s side, a mere warning on Simon’s side. he won’t budge, won’t allow you to go back to that house, hand you on a silver platter to the grim reaper hiding behind letters and eerie messages. 

Dan leans on his side to look at you, ignoring the mass of a man in front of him. “are you sure about this?” his tone is strangely soft, like a switch flipped in his mind, all anger vanishing. you nod, offering him a small smile that does a poor job of concealing how nervous you are about the situation. he purses his lips, taking one last glance at Simon’s unwavering posture before sighing in defeat.

it’s been two weeks since the mirror message that led Simon into comforting you, and two weeks since he had to control his own panic, trying his best not to spiral. it had been a while since he shared a living space, so staying with you feels like a dream that he’s constantly afraid of turning into a nightmare by saying the wrong thing, acting the wrong way, or even thinking about what’s happening. 

the safe house Price arranged is far from the size you’re used to, being at least three times smaller than your own house. but to his surprise, again, your reaction to it contradicts his expectations. it could just be you being a phenomenal actress, covering your resentment behind a beaming smile, but you seemed to have grown accustomed to his presence easily, didn’t protest once, never lamented the loss of luxury and privacy.

he wanted to deny the feeling, shove it deep down in his brain and lock the safe, but it was nice, the domesticity of it all. it was nice learning little details about your routine; how you only get out of bed the second time your alarm rings; how you’re definitely not a morning person, judging by the gruff good morning you mumble when you slide to the counter stool; how you love trying new recipes and quietly dance in the kitchen, freezing when you notice him watching you; or how you’re always carrying something to read, it being a book or a script.

it was nice making you coffee in the morning and seeing you rub your sleepy eyes, nice hearing you humming a song in the shower, nice catching a glimpse of you in lingerie when you forget to lock your bedroom door, nearly making him choke in his own spit by the sight of the small tattoo on your hip. is it a star? a flower?

he felt like he was playing house with you. a game where you’re his loving wife and he’s a devoted husband, where he could feed his delusions, live everything he was convinced he’d never have in this lifetime. inside those walls, he could do it all, except the one thing he longed the most – touch you. kiss the top of your head when you’re baking in the kitchen, run his fingers through your hair when you’re curled up on the couch, feel your soft skin under his fingertips when you lay in bed, bend you over the table when you pass by him in skimpy pyjama shorts.

“do you... wanna watch a movie?” you ask, remote in hand and head leaned back on the sofa, chewing the inside of your cheek and attentively glaring at the television. he tilts to the side, stirring his thoughts away and taking in the view of your features illuminated by the bright lights coming from the screen. it was easy to get lost in how beautiful you were, a magical creature brought to earth to bewitch him. 

your head suddenly shifts to where he’s sitting, and it hits him that you’re still expecting an answer. fuck. “uh, yeah, sure.” he mumbles, snapping back to the telly, swallowing the desires his throat dared to spill.

later that day, Simon steps onto the front porch for a much-needed nicotine fix, dark blues painting the sky as the last rays of sunlight vanish from the horizon. he hates the burning sensation of the smoke in his lungs, but always craves the lightheadedness and dopamine flush in his veins, no matter how many years it takes from his life. 

“god!” you jump, looking behind you and putting a hand over your chest to steady your rapid heartbeat, “you really are a ghost, aren’t you?” a chuckle falls from your lips after the startle, travelling the air like a lullaby, and he ignores the flutter in his chest that happens whenever you laugh.

“sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” you shrug and turn back to your initial position, sitting on the steps and watching the crunchy tree leaves dancing in the breeze. he follows your gaze to the front lawn, bringing a cigarette from the pack to his lips, debating if he should truly smoke with you in there. you never complained, but he’s caught you frowning at the thin cardboard a few times around the house, so he decides not to light it.

“can i ask you something?” you blurt out, lifting your chin to face him, eyes searching for his, and his head dips, irises focusing on yours. one brow raises at your sudden curiosity and he nods, back propped against the column, waiting, “why Ghost?”

his jaw tenses, gaze shifting from you to the carton in his hands. the ever-dreaded question. “dunno. just a nickname.” lie. he couldn’t tell you how everything was taken from him and he faked his death years ago; how he truly became the ghost of man. you don’t deserve to be burdened with that knowledge, so it is just a nickname. 

he looks back to you, gauging if you bought his deflection or not. you’re still focused on him, vision flicking at every crease of his expression, waiting for any falter, but it doesn’t come. “you can call me Simon.”

the thin line of your lips breaks into a smile, cheeks rising and making his heart skip a beat. so much for easy detachment, “okay, Simon.”

the way i still have at least ten parts of this story in my outline but i'm so unmotivated to write it :(

#simon ghost riley #simon riley #ghost #ghost cod #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x you #f!reader #fem!reader #ghost x reader #ghost x you #ghost imagine #ghost fanfiction #bodyguard!ghost #bodyguard!simon #actress!reader #bodyguard au #cod mw #cod mw2 #cod mw3 #gold rush #bodyguard!ghost ☾ #nyx writes ☾ #midnightarcheress

[danikamariewrites]

Hi how have you been

Can I make request for Nesta? Just her being very protective of her innocent gf who is too nice to people and does not know when she is being used and manipulated (so relatable) so nesta always needs to be with her to make sure she doesn’t get taken advantage of

Best Friends Forever

Nesta x reader

A/n: I would kill for a protective gf like Nes. She also gives scary gf privileges. I also could’ve used her to weed out my shitty friends because I was so bad at that.

Warnings: none

Nesta had sworn you were supposed to be out with your friends. She had sworn she heard you tell Gwyn over morning tea, excitedly for that matter, about your plans. So when she arrived home later that afternoon Nesta was confused as to why you were home.

You were curled up on the couch, your favorite fluffy blanket wrapped around your body, with a book in hand. Nesta didn’t ask why. You already had a frown on your face, Nesta didn’t want to upset you anymore.

Weeks went by. Nesta watched as the vicious cycle continued. Your friends promising to hang out with you and then canceling or straight up telling you, “oh, so-and-so will be there and you don’t like each other, so you shouldn’t come out.” You put on a brave face, acting like it didn’t bother you.

It did. Nesta knew it did. The problem, besides your “friends”, was that Nesta didn’t know how to help. She wanted to be mean to your friends. Hell, she wanted to throttle them. The Valkyrie has been protective of you since the day she met you. The fact that you’re being treated so poorly drove her crazy.

You had finally broached the subject, telling Nesta how you felt and that you would talk to them. Of course this conversation came mere weeks before Starfall. Just in time for them to get back in your good graces to go to the party at the River House.

It’s been days since your conversation with your friends. “It went well,” you said joyfully as you strolled along the bridge above the Sidra, hand-in-hand with Nesta. “That’s good.” Nesta said, not fully believing either of your words.

The two of you chatted about any and everything as you explored town. Passing by a restaurant’s patio seating you hear familiar laughter that has you stopping dead in your tracks. Nesta didn’t need to ask you who it was. She knew and she was fuming.

Looking down at you she felt her face heat with anger. Your lips turned down in a small, heartbreaking frown, defeat clouding your eyes. “I asked if we could hang out today.” Your voice came out small. That was Nesta’s breaking point.

Dropping your hand she smoothed down the bodice of her dress to her skirt, taking a long inhale and letting out a long exhale. She turns to face you, gently holding your shoulders. “Why don’t you go into that shop over there,” she points over your shoulder, “and pick out something you want.” Nesta smiles at you softly. You don’t have it in you to argue. Your friends deserved whatever tongue lashing Nesta would give them and you weren’t going to stop your girlfriend.

Nesta stomped over to the table of females, casting a dark shadow as she stared down her nose at them. Those silver flames burning bright in her gray eyes. They all stopped to look at her. The scent of their on her tongue. It was no secret they were never comfortable around the oldest Archeron. Which made Nesta’s job here easier.

“You are the most wretched group of females I have ever had the displeasure of meeting. At least some of the fae here are honest about getting into Rhysand’s good graces but you. You lot just lie and use y/n. She is the last person who deserves to be used. Now I could point out other flaws you all have but that would include me standing here and speaking to you longer than you should have the privilege of. Stay away from y/n, my sister, and the High Lord. Or I won’t be so nice next time.”

Before they could have a reaction Nesta briskly turned on her heel and walked away. Entering the shop she sent you to she found you lurking by a clothing rack by the front window. You immediately ran to her, hugging her tightly around her middle and burying your face in her chest. “Thank you.” You mumble against her.

Nesta squeezed you tighter to her, kissing the top of your head. “Of course my love.” You stayed like that for a few more moments before Nesta spoke again. “I’m interviewing all future friends.” You let out a small laugh in answer. “Deal. But on one condition.” You lean away and meet her curious gaze. “You’re my only best friend.” Nesta pecked your lips, holding your face in her hands. “Always and forever, my love.”

#acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar reader fic #acotar reader imagine #acotar imagine #nesta archeron #nesta fic #nesta fanfic #nesta #nesta acotar #nesta x reader #nesta x you #nesta acosf #nesta archeron x you #nesta archeron x reader #nesta fluff

[autumnteawithfriends]

I despise CherriSnake and here’s why

Before we begin, something I want to clarify is that I don’t care if you ship or don’t ship CherriSnake. You do you, I’m not here to stop you and neither is this post. I just personally wanted to make a post on why I absolutely hate this ship.

Also, props to @cagneyblooms for helping me come up with some of the points.

REASON#1 - They don’t really work as partners for me

This is more of a personal reason to me, but CherriSnake is one of those ships to me where it feels like they absolutely can’t work out as a couple. Since the pilot is somewhat treated as canon in the show, they make no sense considering the fact that Pentious and Cherri absolutely despised eachother in the pilot. Both of them were locked in a turf war against one another and that hatred was mutual. Yet the show does a complete 180 from that and makes Pentious have this crush on Cherri out of nowhere, likely because Vivziepop wanted a straight HH ship and instead of deciding to just make a different character to pair Pentious/Cherri with or just make a entirely new ship. She just looked at the fandom, saw that CherriSnake was somewhat popular, and decided to make it canon last minute. CherriSnake during 2019-2023 just felt like a joke ship to me or something shippers who ship every character together would make. I mean, CherriSnake practically falls into a TON of popular tropes (Enemies/Rivals to Lovers, Angel x Demon, Girlboss x Goofball, probably way more) I’m not dissing this tropes, I even do these tropes myself with OC x Canon pairings I make. It’s just that CherriSnake felt rushed and last minute.

REASON#2 - They lack chemistry and actual interaction

To be fair, I partially put the blame on both Amazon Prime and Vivziepop for this. Amazon Prime because they only gave HH 8 episodes to really show its story, but I also blame Vivziepop for this. Because not only did she waste whatever time she had with those 8 episodes by showing us useless filler with the Vees and The Overlords instead of actually delving into the main sinners and why they’re in Hell. But she also crammed WAY too much content into 8 episodes instead of giving HH proper pacing.

But onto CherriSnake chemistry, Cherri and Pentious’s regular interactions pretty much prove to me that Vivziepop understands nothing about how actual relationships work and just make their dynamic one sided on Pentious’s part. Let’s be honest, Cherri does not reciprocate Pentious in the slightest considering the stuff she does to him. The shitty two dicks joke aside, not only was the kiss between her and Pentious forced because it was only a “heat of the moment” deal, but she also did this.

(Source: TV Tropes under Sir Pentious’s page)

I get that Cherri isn’t exactly a nicest sinner demon in Hazbin, but this combined with the two dicks joke and the kiss she and Pentious share makes her seem incredibly shallow (which she is considering how rushed this ship is in general) If Hazbin Hotel was like Bojack Horseman like some people claim it is, either these would happen.

A. Cherri realizes she was shallow for only wanting Pentious for his two dicks and never really considered how he felt, either leading Cherri and Pentious staying friends or Cherri breaking it off with him.

B. Pentious calls out Cherri for being shallow, thus giving both him and Cherri some development.

C. Cherri realizes that she only liked the kiss because it was less of them being in love and more of a heat of the moment adrenaline rush.

Or literally anything else. Cherri and Pentious never have a genuine interaction that either doesn’t make Cherri seem incredibly shallow or isn’t comedic.

As for the final reason, it may be a bit of a stretch, but I still think it counts.

REASON#3 - It’s borderline pedophillia

Again, props to @cagneyblooms for making me realize this point. Also, because pedophillia is very much a serious topic + I don’t want to throw the term around. I’ll be providing more evidence than the other two.

I’m not kidding, CherriSnake (atleast to me) becomes borderline pedophillic once you think about the lore Vivziepop spoon feeds us through her livestreams instead of diving deep into it. According to Vivziepop, Sir Pentious was in his mid 40s (best speculated to be 45) when he died while Cherri died in her early 20s, already raising a few eyebrows.

Yeah, this is already gross enough, but something that makes the age gap worse is the difference timeframe in which these two died in. Sir Pentious was confirmed to have died in 1888 London and Cherri Bomb died somewhere in the 80s. So not only was Pentious A GROWN ASS MAN WHO ALREADY HAD LIVED AND DIED BEFORE CHERRI WAS BORN, CHERRI WAS LIKELY BARELY A ADULT SINCE SHE WAS EITHER IN HER EARLY 20s AT BEST OR BARELY IN HER 20s AT WORST! This is also mentioning that Sir Pentious is also technically older than Cherri in Hell because depending on what exact year Cherri died in, Sir Pentious had either already spent nearly 100 years in Hell or he actually spent 100 years exactly in Hell when Cherri died. The only thing that really softens blow is that Pentious got a crush on her when they were both in Hell, meaning Cherri was technically still in her 20s in a way.

To conclude this, I hate CherriSnake. It’s one of the few Canon ships I actually despise since I either don’t care for Canon ships or I actually ship Canon couples as well. Even if Vivziepop wasn’t a terrible person, she’s still a really fucking awful writer who can’t stick to anything at all and is more concerned about her shitty Stoltliz soap opera rather than writing a good story. Writers like Vivziepop are the reason why research makes a good story.

#anti hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin hotel critique #anti vivziepop #vivziepop criticism #vivziepop critical #sir pentious hazbin hotel #cherri bomb #anti cherrisnake

[findafight]

The "Robin would never date Steve's ex who broke his heart" take is FUCKING stupid for a lot of reasons.

First of off, the autonomy you're taking out of Robin with this.

Like she's not Steve's sidekick, she's not his yes man, she's an indepent girl who should be free to date any girl she wants.

She would never let her friendship with him ostacolate her love life.

Why the fuck she should do that?!

No one would.

And also, Steve is actually the one who hurt Nancy the most (slut Nancy Wheeler).

And if you think for a second that Robin would ever take Steve's side, then you're wrong.

Just stop centering everything around Steve, and stop reducing Robin to be just his sidekick, 'cause she's FUCKING not.

Hi! So. Pretty sure you found the most recent post I made (on April 6th) tagged anti rnce (and ONLY anti rnce. Not even stranger things. Just anti rnce and my personal original text post tag and a quip about choosing violence. So clearly if that’s how you got here you chose to not just send a post you disagreed with to your friends to rant about but came into my inbox and tried to start shit)And if you didn’t I truly don’t get how you, clearly a rnce fan, found me.

I’m going to be honest. Neither of us are going to change each other’s minds. I don’t like rnce for a lot of reasons, from i just don’t see a romantic spark there to a lot of the shippers being kinda shitty. I don’t care what you ship, really, just that. Claiming it’s canon or should be canon endgame etc gets annoying. And that a lot of the times the way I’ve seen the relationship portrayed (because, contrary to possibly popular belief, I have actually tried to read some fics for them. It’s also such a commonly untagged side or background pairing that I am subjected to it like that often as well) there’s so often weird terf or radfem red flags and alarm bells going off. I’ve seen someone harassed by rnce shippers for calling them out and then those shippers loudly regurgitating terf talking points like it’s fucking funny. I know all fandoms and ships have bad eggs but holy shit.

There’s been a few posts about how for some reason rnce fans try to portray people who don’t like it as making Robin Steve’s sidekick, when really we are acknowledging the facets of her characterization other than her lesbianism. Just because she likes girls doesn’t mean that’s the only thing that matters to her!

Yes, Robin liking girls is part of who she is, it influences how she acts and what she talks about, but it’s not the ONLY thing about her. She likes old movies, she enjoys pop and new wave music, she does her make up in her best friend’s car, she forgot to mention she never learned to drive because he forgot to ask if she could, she thinks combining into a super being with said best friend would possibly solve most of their problems.

Robin is a character who makes her own choices! She chooses to butt in at scoops, chooses to stay with Steve in the bunker to hold off the Russians, chooses to tell him her deepest secret, chooses to apply for jobs with Steve once they heal from the mall, chooses to spend a lot of time with him! And that’s rad. It gives us insight on who she is!

Whenever I’ve written or talked about Robin choosing not to date Nancy, I’ve always made it perfectly clear that it is Robin’s choice. Because given what we see of her in two seasons, Robin is loyal, and greatly values her friendship with Steve. Like. Regardless of how Steve feels about it, and I do think of Robin was legitimately interested in Nancy and Steve thought she had a chance, he’d encourage her to go for it. (Steve isn’t blindly encouraging Robin to hit on Vickie. He has high suspicions that Vickie is queer in some way too! She likes boobies!) I think Robin would think twice about it just because how much she encouraged stancy to get back together in s4.

Honestly, it makes me sad seeing how many times “why would robin choose her best friend’s feelings over getting a gf” is said because like. I value my friends’ feelings all the time. If I thought something I was doing was or would hurt them, I would reevaluate. Why WOULDNT Robin consider her best friend’s feelings? The first person she ever came out to? Who made her feel safe and accepted? Who made her laugh when she felt most vulnerable? Who she encouraged to get back with his ex? Romance is not a level up from friendship, it is not the endgame of life, it is not superior to any other relationship type. Treating friendships as less important to romance is something to reconsider and reevaluate.

Your last point. Anon, who is centring Steve now? Sure. He fucked up in s1. Literally no one denies that. He fucked up and he worked to make things right. He cleaned up the graffiti, he went to apologize to Jonathan, and he presumably apologized to Nancy, because she decided to date him for eleven months after that. I highly doubt there wasn’t heavy gossip about the graffiti or their breakup/makeup. I do agree that before Tina’s party Steve wasn’t helping Nancy as much as he could have, but Nancy wasn’t communicating to him either. They weren’t in the right place for each other. If we consider the alley the breakup, how is that not still breaking his heart? Yes Nancy was on a noble crusade, but it still had collateral damage. It’s something interesting about her character!

Robin wouldn’t be on board with the graffiti. But like. Steve’s changed and apologized since then. And She wasn’t there? She’s just here for the aftermath of Steve’s reignited feelings for Nancy. Idk. Both Steve and Nancy hurt each other in s1/2. It’s not a Steve v Nancy thing? It’s just an acknowledgment that of the two, Robin is closer to Steve. She’s more likely to consider him. She’s not omniscient to everything that happened or the persons feelings and reasons for doing it.

I’m sorry you don’t think friendship has an equal or greater value than some romantic relationship, it must suck. I also hope you find better things to do than to come to someone’s inbox and try to start something over a ship you like that they don’t.

#anti ronance #I censored it in my answer but anon didn’t so it might show up in the search #but not in the tag #findaanswers #listen. just get out of here #if you think I’m a stupid idiot then block and move on #but you clearly came here from somewhere looking at stuff to be mad at because I always make sure to tag #also everyone ignores that Steve has CURRENT FEELINGS for Nancy that ROBIN ENCOURAGED

[mandiemegatron]

I just want to say thank you to everyone for the love and support yall have given me, especially over the last year. With my 30th birthday coming tomorrow, I've had so much time to think and really look back on my life and how far I've come and I am just eternally grateful for everyone who has come into my life, whether you stayed around or not.

I've learned so much about who I am as an individual and even though i truly never thought I'd ever be strong enough to reach this age, it's here now and I almost feel like I'm walking blind through my life now. I wasn't supposed to be here, I wasn't supposed to exist in the first place and yet here I am, trying to thrive and just be a good human being. I've been a shitty person in the past, I accept that I was not a good person at one point in my life and all I can do is strive to be kind and to never be that person ever again.

All I can say is with me finally hitting 1k followers a day before my birthday, you guys have seriously solidified in my head that I deserve to live, I deserve to exist and I deserve to be loved.

Thank you so much to everyone who's stuck around and let me be myself without worry. I never thought I'd ever be this person or live this life, but I'm so happy to be alive. I'm so happy to exist.

I love you all so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

#mandie says a thing #been having a very inside my own head day and its been hard #some days are harder than others but i feel stronger than ever thanks to all of you. #i love you i love you i love you #thank you so much #ok to rb

[bruciemilf]

“Bruce is emotionally incompetent and can’t step outside his own morality” yeah it’s a character flaw.

“Dick is extremely stubborn and thinks he’s right all the time” yeah it’s a character flaw.

“Jason has hypocritical tendencies” yeah it’s a character flaw.

“ Tim is entitled and doesn’t think about people when seeking results, and often acts uncaring” yeah it’s a character flaw.

“Damian is rude and bratty” yeah, it’s a character flaw.

Also, some people may not even regard everything listed above as flaws.

Having negative traits allows incredible flexibility within your characters, what makes them intriguing, what makes them easy to relate to. If you want to write people, then write people. But they can’t be good and clean all the time.

#bruce wayne #dc comics #dc #batman #jason todd #dick grayson #tim drake #I’m really glad we’re growing out of the ‘my favorite is flawless because they’re a good person who has done both wrong ever’ phase #you can absolutely enjoy media that has imperfections and blemishes. these characters should be flawed. they should get to be shitty people #sometimes. they should get a chance to grow and extend and evolve as individuals. because I think that’s what we need to see more #it’s not about being a shitty person. it’s about STAYING a shitty person #text #meta #batfamily

[cloud-based-and-rainpilled]

I’ve been highly confused as to why Michael “deeply openly thirsting on Twitter about David Tennant for half a decade” Sheen is half-in half-out the closet but apparently Wales is absurdly homophobic lmao what the fuck how is a country the size of New Jersey that much of a hater bruh we out number the shit out of you

#i thought googling ‘how to say gay’ in welsh would be funny but it just made me sad #i knew the uk in general had a problem with trans people but WOW it’s fucked up in wales like. there are 8 of you what are you doing #i feel bad now lmao #wales #my weird welsh hyperfixation has taken me places let me tell you #cymru #homophobia #gay #lgbt #lgbtqia #good omens #bbc staged #michael sheen #i thought he was just ‘oh i’m quiet about my personal life’ but that’s not even true like my man’s probably actually scared #what a fuckass country lmao awesome #uk politics #united kingdom #david tennant #what is it with this tiny ass island taking over the world and being shitty lmao and this is coming from an american #bisexual #<- bisexual gang gang feel bad you fuckin haters lol #yes the whole world is homophobic i know etc but it’s like outrageously bad out there apparently #stay mad that i think nationalism is dumb ‘how dare you ever have an opinion you american’ #you’re white you are not going to like where the power + privilege argument inevitably goes

[starwikia]

suicide cw

look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am. 

ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.

this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.

He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!

you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.

it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions. 

what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT. 

am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!

yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).

The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.

#warning: do not read this post if you want me to be nice to james somerton. i am extremely mean in this post. #before anyone accuses me of shit i legit never contacted him myself or anyone involved. i am someone who witnessed this behavior repeatedly #again. i hope hes alive and well. the fact is him lying about this WOULD BE THE IDEAL SITUATION. BC NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THAT. but. #he HAS to forever be the victim in his eyes. attempting doesnt automatically mean youre free of sin. #its just terrible to see that regardless whether or not he did do it #its very clear his attempts to run away from his consequences are working on some people #we need to acknowledge that if your shitty ex friend can weaponize a threat to kill themselves #so can this internet person after being called out for horrendous shit #like what was the alterative? what were people supposed to fucking do? be nice about it? #yeah as if poc and trans women arent historically given shit for being 'too mean' about wanting justice. #this isnt just the plagiarism this is the fact a white dude has been parading himself as THE speaker for the gays(tm) but has been using hi #gayness to shield himself from his misogyny racism transphobia and antisemitism #its very clear regardless this means that ppl r going to side with him and then give him benefit of doubt #if you cant handle the heat stay out of the fucking kitchen dude. this is the consequences of your fucking actions. #hes a disgusting person who cant handle being told no so hes going to drag everyone down with him #like. idk this entire situation is frustrating to me. #its also frustrating ppl trying to be moral abt it like 'see! i knew this was bad all along!' no you didnt. shut it. #for the record im like mainly talking abt twit watching those spineless uwu cutesy ppl basically saying hes done noting wrong #oh and also alt righters who are clearly weaponinizing this where u know they wouldnt give a shit if a right ytber did this. #james somerton #idk might delete this later its just. ugh...

[nerdy-hyperfixations]

Sorry to be a hater but this is how I’ve been feeling recently

#listen. #I love fluff #fluff is great #but does EVERY relationship have to be fluff and only fluff #I’ve noticed in the past that fandoms fandoms tend to #like #stray away from any conflict between characters they ship that doesn’t end in ‘omg you were right and I was so wrong 🥺’ #‘no I was wrong and I’m so sorry 😖😖😖’ #‘okay let’s agree to never fight again and be healthy and happy forever 🥹’ #and I’m more into complex not quite a perfect fit relationships right now #ones where they struggle to stay together #or where they both like each other but don’t get together for reasons OTHER than miscommunication #ones where they know they love each other but there’s obstacles #or where they’re both abusive shits #or where they’re both shitty people and they fit like a glove #I want more than just ‘luv you bby’ ‘awww me too’ ‘let’s go pet puppies together’ #like sometimes I find two characters and I’m like ‘YES! something refreshing! let me find more content’ #only to find all the fandom flanderized the characters #especially with the more toxic ones #it’s like. they’re shitty people but the fandom can’t explore that so they just remove everything that made them interesting #and its like ‘…why are you using *these* characters to do this?’ #there’s every other character in the world to be sweet and cutesy #I’m hyperfixate on *this* dynamic #not the same dynamic every other relationship before it had #it’s like copy paste characterization regardless of if it makes sense #anyway #sorry for being a bitch about this but whatever :/ #personal post

[hella1975]

realising something bad about someone that means the world to you should be illegal. id like to live blindly actually

#ive been tiptoeing around this realisation for a WHILE now but today was the first time i actually verbatim in my head #went 'i dont like living with my mum'. and the moment i thought it was like no nooononono lets NOT do that #like objectively my mum is my favourite person in the world and i love her more than every other person in my life combined #but LIVING with her in HER HOUSE is just not... it. and it makes me feel awful for even thinking it bc that's her biggest fear #that we're gonna grow up to have the same relationship that she had with her mum and that ISNT what's happening like i could never #be distant from my mum in fact the reason she has such a chokehold on me is BECAUSE there's so much love there #but it would still break her heart to know i felt this way and i just feel so shitty for it. but like? i CANT relax here #like the thing that made me think it this morning wasn't even an explosive thing like it usually is with her #like every shouting screaming argument we've had ive just taken it. but then this morning when nothing exceptional happened #i was just. done. so basically i told u guys she wanted me to hoover today and already yelled about it YESTERDAY which. whatever #and she goes out every thurdsay until lunchtime and i think ive said on here before that the days we're home alone are HUGE flashpoints #bc if she comes home and perceives that not enough chores have been done/one thing has been done wrong she just hits the ROOF #like her temper is entirely disproportional she gives the same energy for the washing up not being put away that another mum would #give for finding drugs in their kids room. ive truly never seen someone maintain a temper like that woman can it's actually impressive #so yeah she was gone this morning and it just always leaves me On Edge it's never a huge thing bc im not SCARED of her but im not relaxed #and i hoovered for an hour and washed up and then also dusted the stairs and did some other tiny irrelevant jobs #and my sister did fuck all. she pulled a sickie off work and stayed in bed while i fussed about what to do with the dogs and shit #and so when my mum came home ig i was expecting some sort of acknowledgement? like not a round of applause #bc obvs it's just chores and the hoovering she literally told me to do but when my sister had been SO unhelpful and it had been #SO on my mind for hours now i was just. waiting for something? and even i didnt know what so it's not even fair #but my mum came home and decided she was in a bad mood and she had a go at my sister for being lazy and not doing the chores she said #she'd do today and she DIDNT yell at me which she sometimes does just do if she's pissed at my sister. but she just got mardy with me? #like she got up and left to go watch TV in her room and i was like 'oh i can watch it with you?' bc sometimes when they row my mum #hints at me and her going somewhere else to bitch about my sister. but she just shook her head and snapped at me for some dumb shit #like TINY shit id missed and then wouldn't even spend time with me and i was just like. are you serious #and THAT was when i had the thought bc i was like there is actually no winning with her temper #and i can never fully relax around her because of it. even when we're getting on she is at any point seconds away from ripping my head off #and it's not nice being around someone like that ALL THE TIME. and i dont mind it when im at uni bc im at my own house in my own life #but when it's HER house and she makes it very clear that it's HER house and we need her and the car if we want to so much as LEAVE #then that's just not a fucking pleasant environment to be in? right? even if it is just me being a baby? ugh idk and i hate this

[citrinide]

Saying this in the nicest way possible.

Some people really need to shut up.

#cecil.fm #DESPERATELY begging some of you to stop ignoring huge parts of a character JUST because you like them #He's an asshole. He's CONSISTENTLY an asshole. He makes slights and unnecessary judgements toward EVERYONE. PLEASE IT'S NOT JUST THE CHASSIS #yes this is about Wheatley obviously I'm going to be pissed over people misinterpreting characters from my special interest AGAIN #I was there when people UwU-ified him and treated him like a precious baby while demonising GLaDOS at the same time I'm bashing heads in rn #they're. fucking. FOILS!!! #THEY'RE BOTH BAD PEOPLE OH MY GOD THEY BOTH MAKE UNNECESSARILY RUDE REMARKS YOU NEED TO ACCEPT THIS OH MY GOD #I am begging oh my fucking god #there's moments where I see this behaviour and like desperately want to block people because oh my god what ELSE are you blatantly ignoring #like I'm not innocent either here I'll be the FIRST to admit my f/o is a shitty person too! He's a pathetic little suck up #he's annoying and so fucking rude but I'm not ignoring any of that! #The portal fandom has such an issue with this I swear to god. nothings changed we're going in circles. character analysis is dead. #I think thats what made me cancel LaaC originally too. fuck. #this is why I stay in my little Aperture Tag corner. Because at LEAST we aren't operating under the false pretense that Nigel is some saint #forcing you all (non-specific) to play the game again and TRY to explain away the blatant instances of him being all types of awful #just a general sentiment I've seen again recently that I REALLY despise. stop declawing characters im going to MAUL you #anyway sorry for the tag rant im just very passionate about this game and people misinterpreting characters WILDLY off is. Yeah :)) #extra note: blaming the chassis for his actions as if he wasn't predisposed to that behaviour is a stupid ass take and always has been <3 #i could go on for hours but I'd hit the note limit so <3 #one of my biggest pet peeves in fandom honestly.

[ryanxross]

i dont use this word lightly but my roommate is the biggest narcissist ive ever fucking met and that is fucking saying something

#shes MAD at me that im sick because i guess im not paying her enough fucking attention since im on ordered bed rest. #like are you fucking kidding me #and then shes gaslighting and manipulating me into feeling bad about it because i was like ‘i am on medical orders to stay in bed and not #talk what do you want from me’ #and her response? ‘well i wish you wouldve told me! were friends i wish you would tell me things!’ #and literally the only words I’ve exchanged with her in the psy week have been her asking if somethings wrong and me telling her i dont feel #well and her being like oh what is it and me saying its my lungs being shitty again #like i have said that to her so many fucking times #and shes STILL upset that im not giving her attention and acting like i owe it to her?????? #im not your fucking mom or your babysitter!!!!!! #you are 33 and nearly a decade fucking older than me. act like it for fucks sake #like literally just fuck all the way off #personal #its also like i dont owe you information about my provate medical problems??? #what finally prompted me to message her was he going in the most bitchy fucking voice #‘well if you dont feel well then you need to call a doctor And not just stay in your room’ #like a voice CLEARLY fucking implying she didnt believe i didnt feel well #so I finally was like i HAVE seen a doctor so fuck off #like this is the last thing i should be dealing with when i dont fucking feel well!!!! #and also SHES bwen sick and hacking up a fucking lung without covering her mouth #so YES ive been avoiding her too bc i dont want to get sick!!!! I literally cannot afford to get sick rn id end up in the hospital #and shes offended by that bc ‘its not covid i tested’ and its like okay thats freat but 1) i dont trust your ability to take a covid test #properly since you literally dont know how to do anything #and 2) i domt want whatever the fuck else you have???????? #its just all so fucking infuriating

[the-kneesbees]

.

#i just want this whole thing to be over #i know its mean to push him away like this #but the way our relationship was going. i was just so uncomfortable with the whole thing #i feel so awful because i know im the only person he really has to talk to #but i cant be that for him #its too much #it isnt fair to either of us if things stay they way they were #i still want to be friends but. not in the way he wants. i really cant be that close with someone ive only known a few months #it just doesnt work that way for me #i feel so awful for doing this but theres nothing i can do that would make anything any vetter #i really cant describe how uncomfortable the whole situation made me feel. #it sounds horrible and a bit ridiculous but being that close with him made me feel so shitty. #i hate this it really sucks. #vent #sorry ive been posting so much about this its just. a whole thing right now. #ill delete this later but right now im gonna go watch a movie and probably cry

[lilmccoy]

This evening is just a mood in itself. Discovering a really strange and amazing thing about myself. My parents arguing in the background, with the tv blaring some football game. Just sitting in my room zoning out with this new revelation, realizing I have to go to work tomorrow, and soothing myself by eating half a bag of chocolates. Today just seems adjacent to the actual timeline, if that makes sense.

#it's hardly even supper time and i'm about to fall asleep #but when it comes time for bed watch me stay up daydreaming #nothings wrong though #just a bunch of odd things happening all at once #also just deciding to mind my own business #no need to listen in on the argument #no need to listen in on my coworkers gossiping #but also like how is this life real #i have such a groundbreaking self revelation that totally changes things #and i have to just go to work tomorrow #we're also supposed to get some rough weather tomorrow #and i'm just expected to get out and drive in it when i don't even get paid enough to live on #why can't i just have some job i put my hours in and leave at the office #and never have to think about at home #and how i long to live in a walkable community so i have access to all my free time #and just the wonderful feeling of baking something fresh in the morning #and taking it and a cup of locally roasted coffee out on the front porch with a book #no worrying about shitty coworkers or the state of the world or family drama #and being free to love #personal

[pepprs]

ok actually yeah. i really need to do dishes and go to bed and not stay up late mentalillnessposting a little too viscerally on tumblr the night before i facilitate a workshop in front of the literal president of the university and the vp of my division (LOL about that btw. actively shitting my pants.) but oh my GOD. so saying goodbye to lia was actually fine in the moment. neither of us cried and we talked about all the ways we’ll still be in each others lives and reasons we’ll have to interact in the near future. and she gave me an extremely heartfelt thoughtful gift and we left on a very hopeful note and i felt better and content bc there’s still the rest-of-life and we’ll see each other there. but like an hour before that as i mentioned i was HYSTERICALLY sobbing. in full view of people i know AND people i don’t. and i just sat there and sobbed while everything carried on around me. everything carried on around me!!! and i feel like im about to sob again thinking about it.

#purrs #delete later #idk. i typed a bunch here and then deleted it and now idk what to say. i just feel so lonely. i have had fucked up relationships with every #single older adult in my life and never had someone who could a) stay in my life b) be consistently present in my life c) meet my emotional #needs d) actually See me and accept me for who i am. Like not one person who can be all four of those things. and i have to be all four of t #those things for myself now because im 24 and i missed my chance. but how fucking shitty and painful is that? especially after a year like t #this. the way it’s literally ending the SAME way last year did. huge scary promotion (which i haven’t even talked about on here or to anyone #but lia today actually. but it might be huger and scarier than i thought. which is good but also HUGE -‘d scary. and not a bad thing of bc o #course but it’s so fucking… perilous? like it makes me feel profoundly imperiled because i have extremely good reason to feel that way. and #i have to endure the mortifying ordeal of applying for my own job AGAIN after the first time was so horrible. lol) and also losing a beloved #mentor figure who understood me in a way no one else did which mattered immensely even if they couldn’t do the whole presence thing or #whatever. and now i only have one older adult in my life left (aside from my therapist who doesn’t really count bc i only see her once a #week and we barely know each other still) who is like. here and helping me and i KNOW i am so sick in the head i KNOW and i should not be #writing it but every single day i am fucking terrified that i am being or will be separated from him emotionally or physically jsut like all #the others so. LOL!!!!! i am normal and well adjusted. but it’s like so fucking painful because im grasping at straws but again the reality #is im 24 and the only people on this earth who it is fair for me to expect all 4 from and who should’ve provided it to me are my parents. #and i missed my chance with them forever and now i have to do it myself. and that’s ok sometimes and i can handle it… except in the moments #where im sobbing hysterically and everything carries on. when i am in my darkest moments i want to run to an older adult and have them #comfort me but i truly cannot do that with any of the ones i still have left / regularly interact with for so many reasons. and it’s so #painful it makes me sick sometimes. and now i have to be the romy and the lia i wish to see in this world. but how can i do that when i #haven’t finished grieving over them leaving which feels like leaving ME — NOW — in this moment when i have never needed more support of that #kind more. how can isummon it within myself. im not ready yet. i need a long hug and a hand to hold that won’t (have to) let go. when im #crying i need someone to take me somewhere and comfort me and calm me down. and im 24 so i can’t ask for it. but oh my god i need it. and i #missed my chance. and lia left today and she only ever did that for me metaphorically but… tonight i feel more alone than ever. #and it’s like i don’t even have the emotional intelligence or whatever to ASK for that. bc im playing by ear and i don’t know how to read #the music of it. im self taught. that fucking sucks. that SUCKSSS. also that’s too strong a way to put it liek obviously my friends who are #closer to my age are INTEGRAL to me being able to function and i learn from them and cherish their support. but just like i can’t be a mom #to me my friends can’t either. so it’s like what the fuck do i do. get steamrolled by relentless grief and rage every day i guess. #also side note. everything carried on when i was in brighton too. i came home early ofc but it’s like nothing changed in my absence. and #that has fucked me up SUPREMELY. i think that might be a root of it. like hm… it seems my presence doesn’t have impacts. but idk