#like yeah I get it women are discriminated against in some cases

[drdemonprince]

I'm a trans guy and tbh I feel like I don't fully understand the transandrophobia debate. Based on my understanding of intersectionality & transfeminism, I think that trans men (largely) experience transphobia and misogyny, while trans women (largely) experience transphobia, misogyny, *and* transmisogyny -- I also think it's necessary to discuss issues that specifically affect men without describing them as forms of oppression or discrimination against men. But that's just accounting for intersecting identities (including both marginalized and privileged identities) rather than only accounting for intersecting oppressions, right? I feel like some people using the term "transandrophobia" either seem to be confusing these two concepts or mistaking gender essentialism for discrimination against men (though some just use it to describe a subset of transphobia rather than an intersection, it seems like). In any case, even though misandry isn't a real systemic issue, I can understand why some people feel like there's missing language or frameworks when it comes to discussing the ways men, and trans men specifically, are treated (and the ways they/we treat each other). I'm not sure what better alternatives are available, but I'm sure some are possible. I'm wondering if I'm misunderstanding something or if you have any other thoughts on this. Thanks!

It sounds like you understand this 1000% better than every sincere transandrophobia poster. Not every unique experience is a locus of oppression that needs a systemic oppression label -- but yeah, of course, it merits being talked about.

For example, lots of trans men have a hard time in coping with the shift from being treated with emotional deference and warmth by strangers, to suddenly being treated quite coldly or even in a mistrustful way by strangers. That is a real, painful experience -- and it's one that is wrapped up in damaging gender norms that do also negatively affect cis men. It's not androphobia, but it is a consequence of sexism and the gender binary that sucks, and it merits speaking about.

Where things get dicey and fucked up is when men (either cis or trans) take a painful experience like that and declare that it means they're actually more oppressed than women.

(And, as Lee ButchAnarchist often points out, women's emotions are even more policed than men -- yes men are denied tenderness and warmth from total strangers, but they are showered in affection and caretaking by the women close to them, and they are allowed rage a whole lot more than women, in general. so it's overly simplistic and sexist to say men are more societally emotionally repressed. this dynamic plays out among trans men too -- we are given a lot more latitude to be emotionally explosive. trans women, meanwhile, are told they're being "scary" if they have any negative emotion. This is all also racialized -- Black people of any gender are basically never afforded the chance to voice negative feelings in public no matter how much they police their tone.)

I think a lot of trans masc people have a sudden rude awakening that being treated as a man can be painful and complicated, and that the gender binary harms everyone, and that there is a social price to pay for the privileges of being deferred to, respected, and so on. They also don't want to acknowledge when they are being respected and deferred to -- owning up to having any male privilege feels dirty and wrong to people, which is silly because it's just a reality, it has no moral bearing on the person experiencing the privilege. And of course it's often an incomplete privilege because of sexism and transphobia. But it still happens. Particularly within trans spaces.

I don't think this conversation will move forward productively until more trans men are capable of acknowledging that many of us have privilege and that we are very capable of hurting other people, being sexist, and speaking over trans women. And that's why we gotta make this transandrophobia stuff just completely socially unacceptable in our spaces. It is exactly the same as being a Men's Rights Activist. There are real men's liberation issues! Any worthwhile feminism will also liberate men! There are lots of aspects of the gender binary and patriarchy that are harmful to men, and that's worth talking about. Same with transphobia. But we can't have that conversation when men commandeer it to talk about how actually women have it better and all that vile shit. That talk is used to silence women, trans and cis alike.

[genericpuff]

This has been buggibg me for a while. What is the reason why Rachel dehumanizing nymphs?

Cause from what I'm seeing the nymphs getting the most screen time is Daphne, Minthe, Thetis, Psyche and a little bit of Leuce and Echo.

4 out of the 6 nymphs we see are very open in their sex appeal and flirty. Yet for some reason they get discriminated when Hera, Persophone, and Aphrodite do the same thing but get a pass because the are white coded rich people.

For my knowledge (but I could be wrong if so please correct me) nymphs are known to be seductive and sexy but they were well respected just like any other God. They were given given sacrifices to please them.

Is this just another case of Rachel being the so-called "folkorists" who has done the first Google link she see or could there just be how she interprets then but like the rest of her story misses the mark?

So there are a couple different and equally interesting theories on this.

Rachel has established it as canon that the nymphs are lower class. And there are a lot of stereotypes and prejudices against lower class women going into sex work, which we see in LO through characters like Minthe who work as car girls (notice how in the present story Thetis and Minthe are both personal assistants which is also a role that's commonly stereotyped as "the boss' sidepiece" as it's a role often occupied by women in service to men). Even Leuce isn't safe from this:

Normally I'd just say "good for her" but it's clear with how much Leuce has been turned into the delusional girl who "manifests" her fantasies that Rachel is once again conflating sexuality with more negatively-associated character traits for any woman who isn't Persephone (because when it's Persephone it's sexual liberation always, she's not a "sugar baby", she's a "workaholic" who "earned her position and wealth", but when it's Leuce or Minthe or Thetis they're "homewreckers") And yeah, this is a common disconnect that happens between lower class and upper class people, where lower class people (especially women) are often judged and outcast for doing certain things or behaving a certain way which rich upper class people take and adopt and turn into something "trendy" and "empowering".

But there's... another theory that may explain why so many nymphs in the story are being pigeonholed into the "homewrecking sugar babies" stereotype. And you're gonna hate me for this, because I'm sure the gut reaction to reading this from many is gonna be "goddamit not Lolita again!" buuuttt yeah we're gonna talk about Lolita again.

CONTENT WARNING: We're talking about Lolita again, which means discussion surrounding the sexualization of minors is ahead.

There's a certain term the main character of the book Humbert Humbert uses to describe girls who are specifically, and I quote:

"Between the age limits of nine and fourteen there occur maidens who, to certain bewitched travellers, twice or many times older than they, reveal their true nature which is not human, but nymphic (that is, demoniac); and these chosen creatures I propose to designate as 'nymphets'." - Lolita, Chapter 5, Page 18, paragraph 5

It's also very clear from the way Nabokov specifies the definition of nymphet from Humbert Humbert's perspective that the use of the word 'nymphet' is intentionally referencing the root word of Greek origin:

"...I would have the reader see 'nine' and 'fourteen' as the boundaries - the mirrory beaches and rosy rocks - of an enchanted island haunted by those nymphets of mine and surrounded by a vast, misty sea. Between those age limits, are all girl-children nymphets? Of course not. Otherwise we who are in the know, we lone voyagers, we nympholepts, would have long gone insane."

Though Humbert Humbert is obviously not being literal here, the visual metaphor is strongly relying on the etymology of the word 'nymph', but twisting the depiction of nymphs in such a way to support his own fantasies.

And while I'm definitely not trying to accuse Rachel of having the same mindset of Humbert Humbert (seriously, I want to make it clear that I don't think Rachel is a pedophile, just horribly misled at best), it's interesting to me how this specific definition of a nymphet matches with that of Rachel's old descriptions of her own art:

"You have to be an artist and a madman, a creature of infinite melancholy, with a bubble of hot poison in your loins and a super-voluptuous flame permanently aglow in your subtle spine (oh, how you have to cringe and hide!), in order to discern at once, by ineffable signs - the slightly feline outline of a cheekbone, the slenderness of a downy limb, and other indices which despair and shame and tears of tenderness forbid me to tabulate - the little deadly demon among the wholesome children; she stands unrecognized by them and unconscious herself of her fantastic power."

What's interesting is that I did dig up an old profile of Rachel's that actually acknowledged that what she's doing with her art shouldn't be conflated with, well... child porn.

"It's not THAT kind of lolita" and yet the writing feels like it's been smeared all over the wall with shit. There are so many scenes and artistic choices throughout LO that scream "it is that kind of lolita".

Though it is still a theory, and I don't resort to using Rachel's old art of "proof" of LO's shortcomings, I don't think it should necessarily be ignored that the nymphs in LO seem to be characterized very similarly to Humbert Humbert's description of 'nymphets' - devious and promiscuous, and thus easier to blame when predatory men pursue them, rather than holding those predatory men accountable. And we see this in Persephone too, but unlike the nymphs, Persephone is rich, upper class, and of a "superior pedigree". So she becomes the desirable form of a 'nymphet' that's praised and celebrated by the narrative and characters like Hades, rather than the literal nymphs who are shamed and outcast for simply having sexual independence.

Whatever theory you roll with is on you, you can dismiss all this as just overthinking nonsense, but I do think it makes for interesting food for thought because at this point, LO is undeniably - intentionally or subconsciously - influenced by Rachel's relationship with Lolita, and whether or not that influence is aware at all of Lolita being originally written to be a precautionary tale, that remains to be seen.

#lore olympus critical #anti lore olympus #lo critical #ask me anything #ama #anon ama #anon ask me anything

[aquadestinyswriting]

Ayyyy, Aqua! :D Happy STS! So I'm making my way through Titan Modern AU, and . . . actually, take two questions on it. 8)

I have legitimately looked everywhere, and I am severely curious. :') Have you thought of a title for this one, or is its title literally just Titan Modern AU?

More importantly, tho, how much did you have to change to make the world of Fangthane's Folly fit the modern day? (And what did you end up keeping? I notice there's magic and dwarves, but how different are these bits compared to their DnD roots?)

Hope this ask finds you well! :D o/

Hi Jax, this is technically a day late, but not really because time zones are a thing :P. I am very well, thank you. I am enjoying the fact that the words seem to be flowing quite easily for the time being and taking advantage of that to write a lot for all my ongoing series and creating new ones. Thanks very much for the questions, I have a lot to talk about with this AU :D. Answers are under a cut because the second one is going to get quite long.

Question 1

I don't currently have an actual title for this one yet. I have a tendency to title WIPs towards the end of writing them and this one is no exception. I have some vague ideas, but I'm not too concerned about it just yet. Especially since there's a high possibility that this one is going to throw some major curveballs my way once I get into the thick of the plot that might well change the kind of title I want to give it.

Question 2

Ah, the dwarves are technically not a thing for this one. Everyone is more or less human, unless it's directly stated otherwise. The reason Fangthanian women can have beards at all is down to a slight genetic quirk which means they are pre-disposed to much higher testosterone levels than average. The Throffite community, in particular, is very insular and tend to inter-marry within themselves due to a history of discrimination against them.

As to how I changed the setting to fit with the modern aesthetic:

I've modelled Fangthane city a little bit after towns like Fort William, since the location of Fangthane in Allansia has a relatively similar geography to that of the Scottish Highlands. So Fangthane city is no longer built into the mountain, but is a city that was built very close to the mountain (which is now called Ben Oir). Extrapolating from there, and taking into account the maps that exist of Allansia, it was a a matter of figuring out how and why there would be outposts for the kingdom that are so far away from the capital. In that case, an old empire made a lot of sense, and taking into account the relative time period this AU is set in (roughly the 90s to early 2000s), it also made sense that said empire had been disbanded, but that communities deriving from it still exist (hence why Stonebridge and Firetop are still mainly natively Fangthanian). So, yeah, culturally speaking Fangthane is basically the UK transplanted into Allansia at this point.

I wanted some of the history of Toreguarde to remain intact because there are plot things related to that that will pop up later in the story. The city was almost destroyed, officially, by what is considered to have been a terrorist organisation that was working on behalf of another state and/or one of the ruling council of Toreguarde of the time who went just teeny bit mad with power (Greydown was an absolute ass in canon, and is in this AU too).

As the setting, rather purposefully, appears to be lacking in magic, no mentions are made of demons, portals or the breaking of reality, even by those who were present at the time. The remaining Heroes still exist, but I'm working out what their exact roles in all that were. Egrim is still a priest, so that's him covered. Alexis, upon talking to Dru about it, was probably a sniper that was a part of the military forces of Toreguarde at the time, while Selene was probably some sort of science-y nerd person brought in to help explain some of the weirder stuff that went on that was kind of acknowledged and then later given plausible and sensible scientific explanations. She just happened to be somewhat decent at this diplomacy lark when communication with the reinforcements from Fangthane started going south, hence her current role in the story. She probably worked quite closely with Ivan, who I have yet to figure out the details of, with regards to that. I also need to figure out what Fai did and what happened to him...

I am doing a lot of this worldbuilding and adjusting Fantasy canon on the fly, to be quite honest, so not a lot of it is set in stone just yet. However, I have given some thought to the Throffite community both in Fangthane and in Toreguarde and some of their history and culture, drawing a lot on what I established about Throffism in the fantasy canon and doing some major research into the irl history of such things to make sure that anything I write about it is handled as sensitively as possible. I have also written copious notes on the hows and whys of the fractious relationship between Fangthane and Toreguarde that would fit in with more modern (Western, as that is what I'm familiar with) political norms.

#writeblr asks #storyteller saturday #answered ask #aquadestinyswriting #titan fighting fantasy #titan fighting fantasy modern au

[chthonicillness]

tbh for me as someone who is gay and asexual it is so weird to see people place asexuality as some sort of especially revolutionary and challenging identity when i feel like so much of the… aphobia, if you will, that arises in the world is garden-variety misogyny and patriarchal values and assumptions. i’m sure people have struggled specifically for being asexual, and my experience is my own, but the negative reactions don’t seem to be about a lack of sexual attraction (people think that’s weird and they don’t get it especially when the asexual person in question does have sex) but the unwillingness to have sex (because women are expected to have sex when men desire them and men are expected to desire sex and people aren’t thinking about gender and sexuality on a level more complex than that). people not believing/acknowledging your sexuality is frustrating and is its own form of discrimination but it isn’t unique to asexuality. that’s like a third of the queer experience. anyway sorry this got long i agree with you ijdgi

you can be as wordy as you want here this is a pro wordiness zone!!! anyway yeah i agree a lot of phenomena that get attributed to aphobia are plainly a function of misogyny and it's very clear in the nature of the expectations set and whom they are set for. im not saying there's no discrimination against or negative social perception of asexuality; naturally anything that falls outside of the norm is not going to be perceived kindly. a lot of people still assume it's the result of some psychological or physical ailment (and, you know, even if that were the case for a particular person, whose business is it really what leads someone to identify the way they do). but WHAT is with this wave of oh, you f*gs aren't as queer or as radical in your identity as ME, an asexual 😌. like. get real

#plenty of cases where people suggest a gay person just abandon sex and attraction entirely........ never seen the inverse

[transmalewife]

fellow trans people, a reminder to be very, very careful when saying stuff like "isn't it fucked up that women can get sterilized at will or easily get hormones but trans people have to fight for the same thing" or "women can get the same surgery for *eye roll* back pain but trans men have to get a psychiatrist letter etc etc" because like no, actually. In many places it is functionally impossible for a woman to get willingly sterilized for any reason up to and including terminal illness in some cases. And no, getting a breast reduction for back pain is not a silly whim (and I say this as a trans man who's had top surgery at least in equal parts because of back pain form an overlarge chest and dysphoria). Cis women's reproductive healthcare is a fucking nightmare, and comparing that to trans healthcare in the context of 'they have it so easy' is fucking ridiculous. The issues we face are very similar and they are our natural allies in the fight against gendered discrimination in medical situations. Same with disabled people (and yeah, chronic pain from large breasts can absolutely be disabling). So many of our struggles overlap and we should be fighting together for bodily autonomy and easy, accessible healthcare based on informed consent. Those kinds of arguments are not only blatantly false half the time, they also only serve to alienate the people who are best placed to understand our struggles and unite with us to end them.

#ugh this is so oversimplified but im too tired to elaborate. also yeah both of those are things i've seen trans public figures say online #trans #disability #mine.

[nicole-timey-wimey-stuff]

Science and Magic!

Shield / Criminal Minds crossover.

Fem Reader x Spencer Reid (gradual)

Word count- 2k

My first time writing a fan-fic so bear with me I usually write non fiction. I am also working on others, a dbf Joel Miller one too.

Warnings- swear words/ horror/ gore themes, mentions of murder, death of unsubs victims, descriptions of death, magical powers, discrimination against reader for being inhuman. (My bad grammar lol)

Otherwise mainly fluff, Spencer and reader becoming besotted. (No smut in this series) let me know if I’ve missed anything.

Rating 16+

This will be a 3 part series :)

You awake to the sound of your alarm beeping, with a groan you lean over and silence it. ‘6:30am is way too early to be waking’ you think to yourself. 3 years 32 days and 13 hours and your still not used to the early starts. Kicking your covers off you stumble to the bathroom attached to your bedroom. You clean your teeth bleary eyed before braiding your hair back, whipping on some winged eyeliner and pulling on your Lycra uniform. Giving your self a final once over you leave your bathroom.

Searching your room for your combat boots there was a sudden knock at the door,

“(y/n) come on! Group meeting in 5” Mac’s voice rang through the door.

“Yeah yeah, I’m coming! Just finding my boots!” You huffed back.

Mac let’s out a small laugh before replying with “ Well maybe if you kept your room neater you’d find them quicker!”

“I’m never here long enough to tidy!” You sassed back. Which is true as of recently it’s been one mission after another, with little rest.

Finding your boots under your denim jacket you quickly fumble to get them on.

You open your door to an amused Mac, sending him a quick glare before following him down the hall. Walking into the conference room you have all eyes fall on you knowingly.

“Am I missing something?” You question.

“We are sending a few agents to work alongside the FBI in the BAU” Coulson replies.

“Ok why?” I question again.

“The case they are currently working on involves a very dangerous inhuman, he has been burning his victims from the inside out, and they are trying to work out how he’s doing it.” Coulson explains.

“They haven’t pieced together that he’s an inhuman yet.” Daisy adds with a worried look in her eyes.

“ But it won’t take long to figure it out” Coulson sighs.

“ And we don’t want to give the FBI and the government anymore ammunition to hate us” Daisy follows.

“So we are sending one of our own to help them arrest him before things get any worse” Coulson responds.

“So I’m guessing as everyones looking at me like my face is blue, I’m the inhuman your sending?” You sigh.

“Correct” he grins, handing you the debrief folder.

Reading quickly through the files you are already noticing some trends in the victims, all women, all dark haired with brown eyes, similar ages. But surely a department who specialise in profiling can work this out without the help of an inhuman, you think to yourself.

“So why me?”

The looks again, “my powers” you huff, knowing what this means.

“You want me to show them that not all inhumans are a threat, and my powers can mirror and control his.”

“Exactly” Coulson replies with that fatherly smile he reserves for only Daisy and yourself. He’s been the constant parental figure you’ve needed in your life since you transformed, being there through all the ups and downs, especially the long road to learning to control your powers.

Your an elemental, having control of every element. Which to you has felt like you had five times the work anyone else encountered to learn control. You started with water (nice and easy right?) wrong! Moving the water was easy, until you accidentally froze it creating a thick layer of frozen slush on the training room floor. You found Earth the most effortless, you could bond yourself to it, feel it in your veins. Whether it was healing dying plants or causing intense Earth quakes, to using vines to wrap around and stop any enemies.

Fire took you the longest to master, for the longest time you refused to use it. It was a time bomb whenever you did! The more frustrated you got with it, the larger and angrier the flames grew. These days you had full control over water, Earth, air and decent control over fire, still only opting to use it when in dire need.

“Ok when do I leave?”

“Within the hour, pack a bag and meet Mac, Fitz and myself in the hanger” Coulson stated before leaving the room.

You trudged back to your bedroom, shoving anything you may need for up to two weeks into your duffel. This was going to be interesting……

Arriving in the hanger fitz greeted you, “(Y/N)! I’ve calibrated your arm cuffs to be able to absorb his fire abilities, you can then harness the thermal energy his powers radiate and use it to amplify your own” he explained, showing you the controls.

“Got it, thanks fitz” You smiled.

Approaching Mac You ask if anyone was coming with you, he expressed that himself and Coulson would come to the precinct, to do formal introductions. Then you and Mac were on your own. You were assured the other’s were only a coms link away though, if trouble arose.

The flight on the quinjet was quiet, mentally preparing yourself for what you were going to say, and hoping they weren’t going to be too wary or freaked out at your ‘abilities’.

“Your pulling that grimace you do when your worried” Mac laughed.

“What’s bothering you (y/n/n)”

“I guess it’s just walking into the FBI, and going hey I’m the inhuman with the scary powers, here to help” You deadpanned.

This caused him to laugh out loud, “ You’ll be fine kid, we’ve been told they’re a friendly team”.

“Let’s hope” You sigh.

“You’ll do great (y/n) I have every faith in your abilities as an agent and in your powers” Coulson voiced, trying to offer some positive reassurance.

“Thanks” You hummed still unsure.

As you landed in Quantico Washington DC, You gave yourself a pep talk before exiting the jet. Climbing into the SUV you pulled out the debriefing folder, going back over the case files, making sure you were more than ready for when you all arrived at the precinct.

Pulling up outside, and taking several deep breaths to calm yourself. Mac gave your shoulder a brotherly tap “It’s gonna be fine kid breathe”. You just hummed in response, wanting to get the introductions over with. Being inhuman you were always wary of the people you encounter, some were considerate or indifferent, while other’s could treat you like they are forming their own Salam witch trial!

Walking into the building you noticed how out of date everything looked compared to shield headquarters, we are clearly spoilt with all the tech Coulson receives from Stark! You thought to yourself. Although Coulson is convinced Tony Stark only does this to bribe him, so when the Avengers ask to borrow yourself and Daisy when it’s needed, Coulson can’t say no.

Coming to a big glass door reading Behavioural Analysis Unit, with one last breath you enter behind Coulson.

Walking in you were greeted by a tall man with dark hair,

“Shield I presume?” The dark haired agent questioned.

“That’s us” Coulson declared.

He nodded.

“Welcome to the BAU, I’m agent Hotch I’ll bring you through to meet the rest of the team, then we can do introductions”

We followed him through to what they call the ballpen, “Gather in everyone, these are the agents from Shield” agent Hotch called out.

Hotch introduced everyone one at a time,

“This is SSA Prentniss, SSA Morgan, Agent Jareau, our technical analysis Penelope Garcia, SSA Rossi and Dr Spencer Reid.”

“It’s great to meet you all, I’m director Coulson, this is Agent MacKenzie, and Agent (Y/L/N), we are here to assist you with the capture of the man causing these killings. We happen to already have some information on this criminal, he is an inhuman called Gary Child’s” Coulson informed their team.

“Garcia pull up anything you can find on him!” Hotch commands.

“Already on it!” She replies, quickly tapping away at her computer.

“While she’s digging up any dirt, why don’t you explain to us his inhuman ability’s and anything else you know”. Agent Morgan enquired. From that moment on you could sense an uneasy shift in the conversation, clearly their team was on edge about the suspect being inhuman or how dangerous his powers were.

You suddenly chime in with,

“From what we understand the suspect can cause liquids to boil, just by touching it. He is boiling the victims insides causing them to burn from the inside out.” All eyes are then on you, causing you to shift uncomfortably on your feet, as you avert your eyes to the floor.

“How are we meant to stop an unsub like this?” Dr Reid spoke up, the look of concern evident in his eyes.

“That’s where Agent (Y/L/N) comes in, she is inhuman, a very powerful one.” Mac speaks up.

Well the cat is out of the bag now you think, okay okay just act confident, show them you know what your doing.

“That I was not expecting” Agent Pretniss claims, shocked expression on her face, looking around they all have the same shocked look.

“I’m an elemental, I can control all the elements. So I should be able to get close to him without him hurting me, as I have the abilities of pyrokenisis and hydrokenesis, I can freeze or boil water. So I am hazarding a guess I can use my powers in a similar manner. My co worker, Agent Fitz is a fantastic scientist and he’s created these arm gauntlets, they can absorb the suspects thermal energy, hopefully draining him of energy long enough for me to be able to stop and contain him.” You explain. “I may also be able to use my hydrokenesis to slow him down” you add.

“But how do we know we can trust you?” Agent Jareau demands, “If she is also an inhuman, especially with similar abilities, how do we not know she isn’t helping him!” She continues.

“Woah Agent Y/L/N has been a trusted member of Shield for over 3 years! We trust her with our life’s, in fact she saves them weekly!” Exclaims Mac.

“It’s true she’s a valued member of our team and has even worked with the Avengers, in fact I’m still trying to stop Stark from stealing her” Coulson adds.

“Look we are only here to help! I’m a trusted Agent of shield and a part time Avenger, I helped with the battle in New York against Loki, I’ve even helped prevent the end of the world a few times!” You burst out trying to keep hold of your anger, who were these people! You were only trying to help. “Aaaand” you stammer out, emotions beginning to get the better of you, “Discriminating against me because I have abilities you don’t understand, is not going to help us get any closer to catching this man!” You finish, looking at your friends for support.

“I agree” came the shy voice of Spencer, “We trust Shield, and she’s a part of them, she hasn’t given any reason for us to not trust her, plus the statistical probability of us being able to detain a man with those abilities, without someone like her…… is close to none” he continues. His reply seemed to come out at a fast paced ramble, his shy demeanour adding to its charm. He’s incredibly endearing you think, and pretty easy on the eyes too. Big hazel brown eyes, and floppy golden brown hair. He had such an innocence about him, he reminded you of an adorable puppy dog.

“Ok” said Hotch, “Let’s start making a plan of action” he continues. Seemingly shutting down the other agent's quibbles and worries, and asserting his authority as there are life’s at stake and jobs to be done.

“Thank you” you whisper to Spencer, as you follow the others into a conference room. “Uhh no problem” he replies bashfully, small smile forming on his lips. You both look down at the floor shyly, as your stomachs flutter and hearts race.

Maybe this joining of teams wouldn’t be so bad after all, you decide.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #agents of shield #the avengers #marvel #marvel mcu #agent hotchner #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x fem!reader #dr spencer reid

[radicalandmathematical]

I honestly think one of the most brain dead things that people say is "would you still say that if the genders were reversed?"

like no i wouldn't necessarily still say that or feel that way or whatever if we "reverse the genders" (that is, reverse the sexes) in a situation, and that doesn't make me a hypocrite. It means that I understand that the context fucking changes when you do that.

Calling some guy a man whore or fuck boy is not comparable to calling a woman a whore or slut. People treat the terms man whore or fuck boy like a joke, at most the guy is seen as a creep and a predator, in which case it's usually because he is. Meanwhile the context around calling women whores and sluts is completely different. Women are called these names to shame them, to devalue them, to dehumanize them. They're called sluts and whores as they're being beaten or killed. Does that happen to men? are they called fuck boys or man whores as they're being killed? No? Then stfu. It's not the same when you reverse the sexes. Even if I actually call a man a slut or whore, it has a completely different context, for the same reason.

Yeah, when a woman is offered an amazing opportunity with respect to her career or education I do think it's reasonable to expect her husband or boyfriend to support this move even if it means he has to leave his job and find a new one wherever they move to, but if you reverse it? No, a woman should not uproot her career for a man's. Because that's what always happens. The woman's career is always seen as secondary instead of equal. Beyond that, women are still discriminated against in the work force. It's much more likely for a man to have opportunities for advancement in his work than a woman. If she doesn't take this one she might not get another one. If a woman leaves her job and gets a new one, she is less likely to advance than a man in the same position. It's probably harder for her to even find a position comparable to the one she has, she is more likely to take a serious pay cut if she moves jobs. If she takes a pay cut then she has less financial resources, which makes it harder to leave if she is mistreated, and statistically a woman is more likely to be mistreated and more severely mistreated than a man. So yeah. it's just... completely different.

These are just two examples, but it applies to literally anything, especially heterosexual relationship dynamics. The context is just so different that reversing things completely changes the situation and it's incredibly ignorant to say otherwise.

[sakebytheriver]

Your tags on that zodiac post reminded me that while yeah, my experience is that astrology girlies are usually white women, I have absolutely run into white women and WOC alike who argued that criticizing astrology being used for serious things like job interviews and as physiognomy is racism bc the ancestors of non-white nations practiced astrology 😭

Oh god no 😭😭😭😭

The queers are not surviving the cult boom this generation's going through 😪

Girlies, is it progressive to defend a pseudoscience that's used to discriminate against people for being born in the wrong month just because it's been in the cultures of brown people?

Like the only time I've ever taken a step back and looked at zodiacs in a progressive political lense was when I was in the talking stages with an Indian guy and he asked the cliche what's your sign kind of opener and when I gave my response of like "this is my sign but I don't believe in this stuff" he responded like "yeah i dont really buy into it either but it's a big thing in my country and the Hindu religion" and I kinda took a step back for a second and had a moment of 'is he gonna get offended if i argue against this' before I said something like "even still that doesn't make it real" and he was like "yeah i completely agree" and we moved on to a different topic

And like I do think sometimes there is a white liberal "afraid to tell the poc they're wrong for fear of looking racist" kind of energy towards astrology and especially the American liberal attitude towards it, but ultimately there will be things fully entrenched within a culture of color that is harmful, because even if they've been colonized and subjugated they're still human beings who will make mistakes and missteps along the way and in the case of India in particular they actually teach astrology in universities and treats it as if it's a real science on a national level, which I hope you can all obviously see as extremely harmful to the people living there

Just because astrology has been adopted by people of color and has become entrenched within those cultures does not make it any more valid than the Christianity American queers love to denounce so much

It's just so funny to me when people who claim to want to go against the idea that you have to live your life a certain way and have a certain set of beliefs and have to be born a certain way to be "right" would fully let themselves be suckered into something that is exactly what they say they're against, placing people into boxes and assigning them attributes based solely on the position of the stars on the day they were born, like how is that any different than looking at a person of color and assigning them a personality based solely on the color of their skin?

Astrology is a pseudoscience that has been debunked over and over and over and over and over again, we have more proof that astrology is fake than we have ever had proof that astrology does anything at all except offer another way to discriminate against people, it is no different from phrenology and if you rightfully denounce phrenology as the racist pseudosciene it is then you should also have no issue denouncing astrology, neither are based in scientific fact and are instead weapons used to hurt people, if you think that being into astrology is somehow for queers and poc you're a dumbass that needs to read some actual scientific articles

#ignore me #anon #answered #personal #anonymous #astrology

[ms-hells-bells]

hello! i hope it's ok to ask this, i know that maybe i should be better at this from being into radical feminism for a while now, but do you have any advice on setting better boundries when interacting with men? i usually tend to avoid them altogether but i was with two new male collegues and i somehow ended up hanging out with them and i just wasted my whole night arguing, i guess, with some man about prostitution and misogyny and i feel so exhausted. he didn't know anything about any topics but still talked with so much authority and kept literally calling me crazy and mad and also calling women in prostitution 'whores' etc. i stayed so calm and civil and tried to be very objective while he was freaking out on me but at some point i also ended up letting something personal slip regarding sa which now i really regret cause i didn't want them to know that. but yeah, it was like talking to a wall or some anti-feminism blog on here, literally any argument i made he didn't address and somehow after said that he 'basically said the same thing' as me when there was really no sense to what he was saying. so yeah, if you don't mind, do you have any advice on how to cope with this and avoid such situation in the future...? i just wanted to be social and not feel like an outcast in the group like i tend to usually do, and i did somehow manage to end the night peacefully since i tried to compromise multiple times just to end the discussion already since he just wouldn't stop talking nonsense and saying sexist slurs all over the place. i have to spend another 12 days with them since we are at a short course together and we live in the same dorm... any advice, if you want to, is welcome. thank you and hope you have a good night/day!

first of all, write down as much as you can of what you remember them saying. dates and location and situation. talk to corroborating witnesses if you can, like other women if there were any. this starts a paper trail for future action if you wish to pursue it.

then, just say 'i do not want to have political discussions with work colleagues, it creates an atmosphere of hostility and unprofessionalism, let's avoid such topics in the future'. then if they bring that stuff up again and don't stop, you can make a formal complaint about them creating a hostile work/training environment, potentially even a civil rights complaint because them calling groups of women 'whores' is highly alienating and insulting to women, especially female colleagues that have potentially previously been trapped in the sex industry. as well as using other sexist slurs, like you mention. your workplace would likely jump on that pretty quickly, because using such sexist and inappropriate language in the workplace lines them up for easy win discrimination complaints, and even a lawsuit/workplace investigation if they do nothing about it. you say it's a training course, so it may be even easier, since the stakes are lower for the employer, they could just kick the guys off the course, and if they try to later retaliate against you at your work post-course, they are already on the record and would face repercussions.

if you get to the formal complaint point and your workplace does not have an hr or higher up to make the complaint to, contact your local work rights organisation, because male colleagues using sexist slurs and making horrible misogynistic remarks, like i said, is a slam dunk case of workplace discrimination with no ifs or buts.

[thesmutgoddess]

So there’s this person on TikTok who kept saying We shouldn’t feel bad about misgendering Ezra Miller because male violence is much more prevalent and important than someone’s pronoun, and that going by their pronoun is basically obscuring the severity of their actions for the past years as being another case of gendered violence, no matter how much we try not seeing it as it is.

I’m pretty conflicted because that person is right. I just don’t get the need to misgender anyone, tbh. I would love to know what you think

Yeah, I saw that tiktok on twitter. I didn't particularly like her lack of nuance on the subject and generally dismissive tone. I think there's a respectful way to broach the issue. Ultimately I agree that the #abusehasnogender gender blind approach to domestic violence undermines the systematic reality of male violence perpetuated against women. I don't think we need to misgender Miller in order to discuss how, as a masculine presenting non-binary person, they benefit from many of the same institutions that protect cis-men. Perhaps I'm going to get some pushback for this but I don't think the kind of discrimination a masc-presenting nb that was amab will experience is going to be the same as a feminine presenting trans-woman. Just as the misogyny perpetuated against white women and women of color is not going to be the same. As expected there is a lot of nuance and variables missing from these discussions.

[smallfrenchstudyblr]

Aight, apparently we are doing this - a angry and slightly tipsy commentary of the latest SCOTUS clusterfuck

[Note : so the ruling ended up being pretty much the same as the draft (which is Bad), so this is mainly me getting mad at why this entire decision is legal nonsense and I cannot believe it was actually adopted]

This entire reasoning is full of intellectual clusterfucks that are like a 5 year old inventing a game with rules that guarantee they win. Like :

"litigants are saying that history does not matter, but the Court has always considered history mattered ! However could we change that!"

But also this entire ruling is based on this idea that stare decisis is dead and the Court should not be bound by its own precedent ????

BUT ALSO "No you can't make it about gender equality because "it is squarely foreclosed by our precedents" I- ?????

I am crying, like "don't worry, banning abortion is not "mere pretex[t] designed to effect an invidious discrimination against members of one sex.”"

WELL IT'S KINDA HARD NOT TO TAKE IT LIKE THAT, NGL

Hey maybe make up your mind. I don't like stare decisis either. But I live in a Civil Law country. We WRITE our laws, through vaguely functionnal democratic institutions. Wild, I know. You 're in a common law country. Saying stare decisis is always up for grab is the equivalent of our legislator writing a law and concluding with "but y'know, we can always talk about" NO WE CAN'T THAT IS THE WHOLE POINT

Relying on "The great common law authorities - Bracton, Coke, Hale, and Blackstone" OH WOW I WONDER WHAT ALL THESE RICHWHITEMENRICHWHITEMENRICHWHITEMEN HAVE IN COMMON WHICH COULD HAVE BIASED THEIR OPINION OF ABORTION ????

[more under the cut, obv, this ruling is too damn long and I have THOUGHTS that need to be put SOMEHWERE]

Oh my god I am NOT going over the whole history of men banning abortion for centuries and why it was good once more, SKIP.

"Justice Ginsburg’s opinion..." the AUDACITY to invoke RBG's work in a ruling TAKING BACK WOMEN'S RIGHTS I cannot believe I am reading this with my own two eyes I a way too fucking sober for this

The cognitive dissonance in this ruling is UNREAL :

Stare Decisis "restrains judicial hubris by respecting the judgment of those who grappled with important questions in the past" [proceeds to give a master class in judicial hubris disregarding stare decisis]

"the term “liberty” alone provides little guidance. “Liberty” is a capacious term. As Lincoln once said: “We all declare for Liberty; but in using the same word we do not all mean the same thing.” [proceeds to define what liberty is]

"This Court has long disfavored arguments based on alleged legislative motives" [proceeds to rule based on the alleged constitutional motives of guys 200 years again]

Love how they note that in the Middle Age, awomen caught for getting an abortion "was sentenced to two days in the pillory and three years’ imprisonment." And then went Yeah let's use that as our inspiration.

"Respondents and their amici have no persuasive answer to this historical evidence." Respondant and their amici think that relying on XIIIth century law to decide whether women should have bodily autonomy today is fucking dumb, next.

[insert spongebob meme] "Some of the Court’s most important constitutional decisions have overruled prior precedents. See, e.g., Brown v. Board of Education, 347 U. S. 483, 491 (overruling the infamous decision in Plessy v. Ferguson, 163 U. S. 537, and its progeny)." OH so you ARE aware of these cases ? Cool cool, just to check that you knew what you were opening the door for literaly the entirery of civil rights to be walked back to the XIXth century.

"The Undue Burden test is too vague" oh yeah sure, because the other legal standards are cristal clear and totally not subject to interpretation. "Reasonable person", "rational basis" are absolutely transparent, obvious standards.

"You give too many differerent reasons why access to abortion is important, that's sus" (aka "The Casey plurality’s speculative attempt to weigh the relative importance of the interests of the fetus and the mother") Wow it's like there are lots of different reasons why access to abortion is important.

"The Solicitor General suggests that overruling Roe and Casey would threaten the protection of other rights under the Due Process Clause. The Court emphasizes that this decision concerns the constitutional right to abortion and no other right. Nothing in this opinion should be understood to cast doubt on precedents that do not concern abortion." CUE MY ABSOLUTE FERAL BANSHEE SCREAMING HOW CAN YOU EVEN WRITE THIS HOW ARE YOU REAL ON WHAT PLANET TO DO YOU LIVE ??

jfc I am stopping there rn I can't deal with this I am too European for this shit.

#tw alcohol #scotus #dobbs v jackson #abortion #this is what I got a degree in american law for fml #and then scotus goes OH WOW I WONDER WHY OTHER COURTS DON'T REFER MORE TO US #bitch bc you take a time machine to the middle age everytime someone asks you of maybe all people should have dignity

[miliyaread]

JAPAN:  The Paradox of Harmony by Keiko Hirata and Mark Warschauer

4⭐️/5

Japan is known as one of the good countries with always about good things that we heard online or from advertisements. But, face it. No country is perfect, including Japan. This is something that is common in every country. This book is open for discussion of certain issues in Japan, which are The Whistleblower, Grass Eating Girly Men, Graying and Shrinking, Getting Along with the Neighbour, Meltdown, and finally, What We Learned at Lunch. All topics included real example and real conversations, I believe. The discussion was long for every chapter, which is why I limited my review to the interesting fact that I learn.

The first issue that was discussed was The Whistleblower. It includes the working condition of Japan, which for me was a flaw in others. Unlike Malaysian (who I believe like to jump jobs for better conditions and salary), Japanese will stay in the same company for a very long time (possibly for a lifetime). I have nothing to against, as long as I was treated with fair and good composition. Can you imagine how loyal the Japanese are to their employer? Even though the employer treats them badly, to the point they have to go to court just to claim their right. Yes, this is what happened in Japan. However, I don’t think Japan’s court was fair to the victims. The whistleblowers quickly become outcasts. And we are not yet talking about mandatory overtime and the guilty pressure if the employees take leave.  ‘No Overtime Days’ was a scam. Yep, not a good sign. This is why there were lots of karoshi cases in Japan. Japanese also have a family system in that only men go to work while women take care of their families. For me, if I want a family, I need both to corporate. And I also can conclude that Japan’s workplace discrimination against women. There were lots of carriers for women to take up their careers, which is not fair. Just be clear, men will not be born if there are no women. So, be nice to women as well. The second issue was about Grass Eating Girly Men, and yes, it is about men. An idea about men were men should find a company and work with them for the rest of their life, supporting their families while women stay at home. A little bit of lame and old thinking, but that was the ideal. However, some people have another idea about men in Japan. And there was a section dedicated to The Johnny’s, which I know a lots of people know them. And I am very happy that the author mentions Kitagawa’s serious allegation. I mean, come on. People talked when it happened. And the famous topic, Otaku men. Otaku is an insult in Japan, but in western and other Asia, we take it as pride (not me, really). Otaku to them is a geek, but some are still with them because of securities. And the Idol otaku. yeah, I don’t really understand the hype. I listen to them but for me to spend so much on people who don’t look at you, nope. So, this is why many women decide to be single women. The third issue was about Graying and Shrinking, which is kind of related to the second issue. Yes, we are talking about the old population, which is one of the problems faced by the Japanese. When people don’t have an interest in marriage, the birth population decreased which leads to an increase in the old man population. In Japan, it is very popular for the Japanese to use seniority level in every aspect, including in prison. The certain reason that led to this situation is the low fertility rate as the main reasons for that were delayed marriage and non-marriage. Another reason is also that being a mother is not easy in Japan (again, not fair for mothers in Japan!) which is why women tend to have fewer children. So, the solution was to attract more foreign workers. But, this also lead to the next issue in Japan, which is racism and criticised as ripe for abuse. And not surprising that many foreign workers died due to karoshi.   Next, we have an issue with Getting along with the Neighbours. At first, I thought it is about the neighbour next door to their house (I mean I thought Japanese usually have a good relationship with their neighbour), but actually, it is not. It is about the neighbours’ countries. This is due to the face of the war before. The famous case is about comfort women. Japan also concurred Tanah Melayu before, so I believed Malaysia also was a victim of this, like Korea. Korea's anger toward Japan for this matter is understandable, especially when Japan refused to acknowledge this matter. There is also mention about policy, politics and issues of zanichi mentioned here. But, face it. I suck at politics, and politic matter. Well, the problem with Korea was not only about the comfort women, but also because of disputed islands between Japan and Korea. The K-wave does not reduce the tension at all. And Japan also needs to face this dispute with China as well. The second last issue was regarding Meltdown, which is focused on nuclear in Japan. Fukushima becomes Japan’s Chornobyl (Chornobyl is very scary) because of the earthquake in 2011. It is very scary to deal with the destroyed rectors. Only after 19 months after the earthquake and tsunami, TEPCO acknowledged its faults in accident preparation. Although TEPCO had been warned about warning regarding the effect of earthquakes that measuring more than 8.3 can create disable Fukushima, the nuclear plant was still built. Yoshida, the man who save lives from the disaster of the nuclear leak and become the unsung hero who tried to save many live and Fukushima, was also one of the men in TECPO’s leaders who ignored the warning. The effect of this disaster was many people not only lost their land and house but also lost their life after that by suicide. Fukushima became a ghost town. Lastly, we have What We Learned at Lunch. The Japanese school system was very unique and different from other systems in other countries. Japan has collective systems and students spend more time at school (I do not envy that. Malaysian felt very happy at the end of the school period and really want to go home as soon as they can). Teachers also become important in students’ life. Sometimes, when I read manga or watch anime or drama about high school in Japan, I always thought should parents be more concerned about their kids’ problems and life instead of teachers? What is used by parents? But, they have a good system of MEXT, which I acknowledge. No wonder Japanese students are at other levels compared to other students. Also, the Japanese are famous for school spirit. Maybe that made why students spend more time in school. Malaysian have it, but we do it because we have to. Some parents or teachers do not really support students in that. Still, there is some flaw in the education system. The famous flaw was the bullied culture, which is also faced by employees in the company. They bully people (usually weak students) in a group (which is totally cowardly move. Grow up!). Do you know the worst part? Sometimes, even teachers are afraid of bullies. They were afraid that they lost control of their class (that is not how it is going, sensei). And yes, the exam and testing. It is troublesome. Maybe not bad as the Korean exam, but still exam is the one thing that I am not envy in Japan. So, yes! Japan has many good things happened that we learn and heard from Japan. But every country had its own flaw, including mine and Japan. There is no such perfect country in this world, but still, we can take every bad and good thing as a lesson for our own learning process.

Disclaimer: All the opinion about this book is based on my personal view!

#book review #JAPAN: The Paradox of Harmony #Keiko Hirata #Mark Warschauer #4.5/5 #Cultural #Nonfiction #Sociology #miliyaread

[fite-club]

genuine q, i don’t really have a stake in internet discourse so idk what’s going on. i saw the term “transandrophobia” for the first time today and saw you commenting so i scrolled through your blog. i saw you replied to an ask with ``their answer to “so which is it, are transmascs oppressed because we’re seen as men or seen as women?” is “whichever works best for my argument in that moment”`` which i’m kind of confused by. cause like i can see it varying on a case by case basis, if someone excludes a trans man from a queer space for passing too well then like i get that i don’t really think that’s oppression but just hurtful to be excluded from gay spaces. and if they’re perceived as a woman by someone else and experience misogyny like that happens too. i’m just confused on what the argument is, i’m not tryna be dismissive just trying to understand what’s like Going On with all the transandrophobia business. is it that people are claiming to be oppressed for being men is that the issue? just want some nuance cause i can’t grasp it from the random threads i keep finding

yeah parsing through “transandrophobia” discourse is hard because there’s not a consistently used definition or reasoning. the issue is, yeah, people claiming that they’re oppressed for being transmasc specifically (not not just for being trans). the fact that transmascs can be treated as men or women depending on the situation is proof in of itself that “transandrophobia” cannot exist, because the transphobia is motivated in different ways. we experience transphobia when we’re treated like women, and we experience misogyny when we’re treated lesser because of that. systems of oppression that target men like “androphobia” or “misandry” do not exist. the only people who actually hold bigoted views against men are radfems and TERFs*, who are not a majority capable of enacting any structural oppression against men. “anti-masculinity” is not a problem. a trans man might be excluded from a queer group for being “too masc”, but so would a transfem who doesn’t pass. every instance of discrimination against transmascs (besides specific details) is something also experienced by transfems or butch/gnc cis women. because the discrimination comes from misogyny and transphobia, not “transandrophobia”.

the reason why this matters at all is because it’s important to address transmisogyny in the trans community and “transandrophobia truthers” deny that transmascs have any kind of privilege over transfems. i speculate that the reason why terms like “transmisandry” or “transandrophobia” exist in the first place is because transmascs didn’t like admitting that they’re TME (transmisogyny exempt). TME and TMA were terms used by the transfem community to denote the differences in transfem and transmasc experiences. because they ARE different— the defining factor being gender. men have privilege over women; trans men are men and trans women are women; trans men have power over trans women. transfems get called baeddels and transandrophobes just for pointing that out, but it’s the truth. it’s gross seeing other trans guys deny that and avoid taking any accountability whatsoever— we aren’t incapable of being transmisogynistic just because we’re also trans.

*if someone seems to seriously believe that most people hate men and think of them all as brutish predators, if someone is trying to explain how everyone else in the world distrusts men both cis and trans, if someone is saying they’re tired of hearing that transmascs don’t face any oppression at all… that someone has too many radfems and terfs in their life/social circles. these are FRINGE, extremist, reactionary beliefs and they DO NOT reflect the community as a whole. if someone feels like these opinions are the norm, it’s because it’s their norm, which they don’t realize is a bubble.

#transandrophobia

[not-so-rosyyy]

You heard about song jong ki girlfriend they found out she a single mother now people are wondering what his dad going to say cause he hated the fact song hey was older but I know Korea has rules about plastering non celebs in the news but that women is everywhere they didn’t even cover up her kids I guess it because she white British lady but good luck to her she going to need it

his girlfriend Katy Saunders is apparently a former b-list celebrity, so the photos floating around the web are inevitable i'm afraid. as for her age, she's just a year older than Joong Ki so i don't really think that would be an issue.

i'd like to hone in, though, on how this news will be taken not just by Joong Ki's family but by the entire country and his fans there. some people have called his dad "misogynistic" (and yeah he might very well be), but South Korea itself has a huge problem with sexism in general. one such case is the severe social stigma against single mothers. SK has a confucianist culture that thrives on hiearchy and bloodlines, so if you have no paternal relations, you're immediately outcast from family gatherings and such. single moms there are seen as "irresponsible"/ "shameful" and are considered as the black sheeps of the clan. the discrimination extends to a lot of things that make both mother and child's lives difficult that only about 25,000 single moms in the whole country decided to get officially registered because the rest are afraid of being ostracized. (add to this the fact that SK is now being run by a far-right, anti-feminist President who quite literally won the last elections on a campaign that promoted the idea of feminism being a form of reverse discrimination against men 🤡)

but i digress. i hope the two of them do make it past dating honestly. right now though, all i can say is that it's interesting to see how Joong Ki--a very famous personality there--will be navigating this whole thing

#song joong ki #katy saunders #korean entertainment #kdrama post #south korea #misogyny

[zoueriemandzijnopmars]

I never understand why they would call women a ‘minority’ group

#like??? it’s 50% of the world that’s not a minority??? #like yeah I get it women are discriminated against in some cases #but don’t call it minority #anyway apart from that this is a good paper #they apologised for using a gender binary because that’s what their available data used #but their methods are also applicable to non binary data so <3 good work #anyway googling the actual percentage of women in the world is largely upsetting me so maybe don’t do that #but like there are more men than women even though in most countries women are in the majority #but in China and India for example there are more men so that goes quickly then #also some Arabic countries apparently have a 200+ men vs 100 women ratio and just thinking about why is very upsetting #anyway so there would naturally be about 105 boys be born for every 100 girls but women live longer so the difference in population you see #in the world is caused by other factors #anyway so this too an upsetting turn #i made an original post #feminism #? adjacent

[fatliberation]

I’m Abandoning Body Positivity and Here’s Why

In short: it’s fatphobic.

“A rallying cry for a shift in societal norms has now become the skinny girl’s reassurance that she isn’t really fat. Fatness, through this lens of ‘body positivity’, remains the worst thing a person can be.” (Kayleigh Donaldson)

•  •  •

I have always had a lot of conflicting opinions about the body positivity movement, but it’s much more widely known (and accepted, go figure) than the fat liberation movement, so I often used the two terms interchangeably in conversation about anti-fatness. But the longer I’ve been following the body positivity movement, the more I’ve realized how much it has strayed from its fat lib origins. It has been hijacked; deluded to center thin, able, white, socially acceptable bodies.

Bopo’s origins are undoubtedly grounded in fat liberation. The fat activists of the 1960s paved the way for the shred of size acceptance we see in media today, initially protesting the discrimination and lack of access to equal opportunities for fat people specifically. This early movement highlighted the abuse, mental health struggles, malpractice in the medical field, and called for equal pay, equal access, equal respect, an end to fatphobic structures and ideas. It saddens me that it hasn’t made much progress in those regards. 

Today, the #bopo movement encapsulates more the idea of loving your own body versus ensuring that individuals regardless of their weight and appearance are given equal opportunities in the workplace, schools, fashion and media. Somehow those demands never made it outside of the ‘taboo’ category, and privileged people would much more readily accept the warm and fuzzy, sugar-coated message of “love yourself!” But as @yrfatfriend once said, this idea reduces fat people’s struggles to a problem of mindset, rather than a product of external oppressors that need to be abolished in order for fat people to live freely.

That generalized statement, “love yourself,” is how a movement started by fat people for the rights of fat people was diluted so much, it now serves a thin model on Instagram posting about how she has a tummy roll and cellulite on her thighs - then getting praised for loving her body despite *gasp!* its minor resemblance to a fat body. 

Look. Pretty much everyone has insecurities about their bodies, especially those of us who belong to marginalized groups. If you don’t have body issues, you’re a privileged miracle, but our beauty-obsessed society has conditioned us to want to look a certain way, and if we have any features that the western beauty standard considers as “flaws,” yeah! We feel bad about it! So it’s not surprising that people who feel bad about themselves would want to hop on a movement that says ‘hey, you’re beautiful as you are!’ That’s a message everyone would like to hear. Any person who has once thought of themselves as less than beautiful now feels that this movement is theirs. And everyone has insecurities, so everyone feels entitled to the safe space. And when a space made for a minority includes the majority, the cycle happens again and the majority oppresses the minority. What I’m trying to explain here is that thin people now feel a sense of ownership over body positive spaces. 

Regardless of how badly thin people feel about their bodies, they still experience thin privilege. They can sit down in a theater or an airplane without even thinking about it, they can eat in front of others without judgement, they can go the doctor with a problem and actually have it fixed right away, they can find cute clothes in their size with ease, they do not suffer from assumptions of laziness/failure based on stereotype, they see their body type represented everywhere in media, the list goes on and on. They do not face discrimination based off of the size of their body. 

Yet diet culture and fatphobia affects everyone, and of course thin people do still feel bad about the little fat they have on their bodies. But the failure to examine WHY they feel bad about it, is what perpetuates fatphobia within the bopo movement. They’re labeled “brave” for showing a pinch of chub, yet fail to address what makes it so acceptably daring, and how damaging it is to people who are shamed for living in fat bodies. Much like the rest of society, thin body positivity is still driven by the fear of fat, and does nothing to dismantle fatphobia within structures or within themselves.

Evette Dionne sums it up perfectly in her article, “The Fragility of Body Positivity: How a Radical Movement Lost Its Way.”

“The body-positive media economy centers these affirming, empowering, let-me-pinch-a-fat-roll-to-show-how-much-I-love-myself stories while failing to actually challenge institutions to stop discriminating against fat people. More importantly, most of those stories center thin, white, cisgender, heterosexual women who have co-opted the movement to build their brands. Rutter has labeled this erasure ‘Socially Acceptable Body Positivity.’

“On social media, it actually gets worse for fat bodies: We’re not just being erased from body positivity, fat women are being actively vilified. Health has become the stick with which to beat fat people with [sic], and the benchmark for whether body positivity should include someone” (Dionne).

Ah, yes. The medicalization of fat bodies, and the moralization of health. I’ve ranted about this before. Countless comments on posts of big women that say stuff like “I’m all for body positivity, but this is just unhealthy and it shouldn’t be celebrated.” I’ve heard writer/activist Aubrey Gordon once say that body positivity has become something like a shield for anti-fatness. It’s anti-fatness that has been repackaged as empowerment. It’s a striking double-standard. Fat people are told to be comfortable in their bodies (as if that’s what’s going to fix things) but in turn are punished when they’re okay with being fat. Make it make sense.

Since thin people feel a sense of ownership over body positive spaces, and they get to hide behind “health” when they are picking and choosing who can and cannot be body positive, they base it off of who looks the most socially acceptable. And I’m sure they aren’t consciously picking and choosing, it comes from implicit bias. But the socially acceptable bodies they center are small to medium fat, with an hourglass shape. They have shaped a new beauty standard specifically FOR FAT PEOPLE. (Have you ever seen a plus sized model with neck fat?? I’m genuinely asking because I have yet to find one!) The bopo movement works to exclude and silence people who are on the largest end of the weight spectrum. 

Speaking of exclusion, let’s talk about fashion for a minute.

For some reason, (COUGH COUGH CAPITALISM) body positivity is largely centered around fashion. And surprise surprise, it’s still not inclusive to fat people. Fashion companies get a pat on the back for expanding their sizing two sizes up from what they previously offered, when they are still leaving out larger fat people completely. In general, clothing companies charge more for clothes with more fabric, so people who need the largest sizes are left high and dry. It’s next to impossible to find affordable clothes that also look nice. Fashion piggybacks on the bopo movement as a marketing tactic, and exploits the very bodies it claims to be serving. (Need I mention the time Urban Outfitters used a "curvy” model to sell a size it doesn’t even carry?)

The movement also works to exclude and silence fat Black activists.

In her article, “The Body Positivity Movement Both Takes From and Erases Fat Black Women” Donyae Coles explains how both white people and thin celebrities such as Jameela Jamil profit from the movement that Black women built.

“Since long before blogging was a thing, fat Black women have been vocal about body acceptance, with women like Sharon Quinn and Marie Denee, or the work of Sonya Renee Taylor with The Body Is Not An Apology. We’ve been out here, and we’re still here, but the overwhelming face of the movement is white and thin because the mainstream still craves it, and white and thin people have no problem with profiting off the work of fat, non-white bodies.”

“There is a persistent belief that when thin and/or white people enter the body positive realm and begin to repeat the messages that Black women have been saying for years in some cases, when they imitate the labor that Black women have already put in that we should be thankful that they are “boosting” our message. This completely ignores the fact that in doing so they are profiting off of that labor. They are gaining the notoriety, the mark of an expert in something they learned from an ignored Black woman” (Coles).

My next essay will go into detail about this and illuminate key figures who paved the way for body acceptance in communities of color. 

The true purpose of this movement has gotten completely lost. So where the fuck do we go from here? 

We break up with it, and run back to the faithful ex our parents disapproved of. We go back to the roots of the fat liberation movement, carved out for us by the fat feminists, the queer fat activists, the fat Black community, and the allies it began with. Everything they have preached since the 1960s and 70s is one hundred percent applicable today. We get educated. We examine diet culture through a capitalist lens. We tackle thin, white-supremacist systems and weight based discrimination, as well as internalized bias. We challenge our healthcare workers to unlearn their bias, treat, and support fat patients accordingly. We make our homes and spaces accessible and welcoming to people of any size, or any (dis)ability. “We must first protect and uplift people in marginalized bodies, only then can we mandate self-love” (Gordon).

Think about it. In the face of discrimination, mistreatment, and emotional abuse, we as a society are telling fat people to love their bodies, when we should be putting our energy toward removing those fatphobic ideas and structures so that fat people can live in a world that doesn’t require them to feel bad about their bodies. It’s like hitting someone with a rock and telling them not to bruise!

While learning to love and care for the body that you’re in is important, I think that body positivity also fails in teaching that because it puts even more emphasis on beauty. Instead of saying, “you don’t have to be ‘beautiful’ to be loved and appreciated,” its main lesson is that “all bodies are beautiful.” We live in a society obsessed with appearance, and it is irresponsible to ignore the hierarchy of beauty standards that exist in every space. Although it should be relative, “beautiful” has been given a meaning. And that meaning is thin, abled, symmetric, and eurocentric. 

Beauty and ugliness are irrelevant, made-up constructs. People will always be drawn to you no matter what, so you deserve to exist in your body without struggling to conform to an impossible and bigoted standard. Love and accept your body for YOURSELF AND NO ONE ELSE, because you do not exist to please the eyes of other people. That’s what I wish we were teaching instead. Radical self acceptance!

As of today, the ultimate message of the body positivity movement is: Love your body “despite its imperfections.” Or people with “perfect and imperfect bodies both deserve love.” As long as we are upholding the notion that there IS a perfect body that looks a certain way, and every body that falls outside of that category is imperfect, we are upholding white supremacy, eugenics, anti-fatness, and ableism.

#body positivity #bopo #body posi #body positive #body acceptance #fat acceptance #fat activism #fat liberation #anti fatness #anti blackness #anti fat bias #lookism #beauty standards #self acceptance