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adultswim2021 · 3 years

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Ephemera Week (2002)

I really wonder how effectively I’ll be able to do this in 2003. In 2003, Adult Swim started doing the black and white text bumps, where they give max sass and NO EFFS (fucks), so every week had unique content. I definitely don’t have the resources to catalogue every bumper or even come up with a decent “best of”. Ephemera Corner 2003 may look very different. To quote my good friend Zorak, “Brak, do you ever think about the future?”. To this I say, yes. Yes, Zorak, I do.

BROADCAST ANOMALIES AND SPECIAL NIGHTS!

Adult Swim Action (and other stuff) | February 23, 2002

February 23rd was the first installment of Adult Swim Action. Up to this point, Adult Swim aired a block of mostly comedy capped off with Cowyboy Bebop. This was the first formal separation of Action and Comedy. I remember the bitter rivalry between the two fandoms on various message boards I posted on. It really did seem like a venn diagram with almost no overlap; action fans hated the comedy shows (maybe they liked one or two but hated the rest) and the same went for the comedy fans, except most of the comedy fans I knew were devout anime haters.

At the height of my anime animosity an internet ex-friend of mine started a message board called ANIME SUCKS. It was an experience I’ll always remember fondly. At it’s peak it had over 1000 members. All but about a dozen of those members were actually ANGRY anime fans who just stumbled on the board and were FURIOUS at us for being anti-anime, and we’d just act like obtuse dickheads about it. Like, we’d act stupider than they were and just wind them up.

We developed a few tricks to really set somebody off. For example: they’d write an impassioned defense of anime as an art form, and say something like “it’s not all like Pokemon or Dragonball Z”, to which we’d reply “actually those are the only two animes I like”. This really got them. There was a special thrill to just replying “miyazaki is an idiot” to a guy’s 6-paragraph essay about why anime was “good, actually”, prompting an even longer response. It was really fun! We didn’t have to harass people online, they’d just come to us to get abused. I’ve never seen bait get taken so effortlessly. One day that guy just closed the message board, locked everyone out, and disappeared forever.

That was some aside, huh? Anyway, the arrival of Adult Swim Action meant that Adult Swim stopped airing the Thursday night repeats of Adult Swim Comedy, which was a shame. It Also meant Adult Swim’s Sunday night had an extra hour to fill, which they did with Rocky & Bullwinkle and the Popeye Show. People complained. I didn’t. Vintage animation is just a different take on the “adult” label. Besides, I was used to tuning out by 12AM anyway, so even if I didn’t like those shows (I did!) I wasn’t missing anything, really. But yes, if it were a full hour of Space Ghost repeats I guess that would’ve been better.

The Lewis Lectures | May 19, 2002 - 12:45 AM

A repeat of Lewis Lectures? IT HAPPENED! But what was so different about this broadcast of Lewis Lectures? Well, they accidentally scrambled the SAP audio with the default English audio, causing the Spanish soundtrack to play in tandem with the English one. It was bloody well fucked mate. This is simply no longer England.

I remember becoming an Adult Swim completist and taping this, considering it some kind of void in my collection. Part of me wishes I saved the recording, so I could combine it with the inferior YouTube rip currently up and have a closer-to-pristine copy than the one that’s available. But also, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST THIS IS LEWIS LECTURES WE ARE TALKING ABOUT. How much pain can I inflict on myself?

Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law Mini-Marathon | September 15, 2002 - 11:00 PM

On this night they aired a little Harvey Birdman marathon of the 4 episodes. This was kinda baffling, as Birdman had 6 episodes to its name and they’d been repeated into the ground by this point. I guess it goes to show that Adult Swim kinda considered Birdman to be their prestige program. I’m hard-pressed to call any one Adult Swim show “smart” in a way that’s apparent on a shallow level. Birdman is set in a courtroom, animated the most competently out of all their other shows, and involved cultural references in a showy way. Like, Space Ghost having Dave Willis absurdly shout “UP THE CHAIN” in the background of a Space Ghost episode is almost just a weird easter egg. But Birdman? Birdman was name-dropping Hanna Barbera characters the same way Frasier would talk about whatever gay shit Frasier talked about.

They aired The Dabba Don, Shaggy Busted, Shoyu Weenie, Very Personal Injury in that order. I would’ve swapped Shaggy and Shoyu and for Bannon Custody Battle and Death by Chocolate, but that’s just me, I guess.

vimeo

Adult Swim New Years Bash hosted by Carl and Brak | December 31, 2002 - 11:00 PM

Adult Swim officially ended 2002 with this: a night hosted by Carl and Brak in Times Square, watching the ball drop (which was FREAKING MEATWAD!!!!). I remember this night fondly. Unfortunately I can’t find the whole thing, but here’s a single segment I found on vimeo to give you some idea. I think I had it up at one point and Turner very annoyingly had it taken down.

I used to have this massive physical media collection; stuff on VHS and DVD and DVD-R that was meticulously catalogued. I ditched a lot of it in favor of digitizing stuff like this, eternally keeping it on hard drives that I meant to back up but never did. It seems more convenient, but it isn’t. If this were 2003 and I needed to show you this, I would be able to retrieve it from one of my many shelves. I might still have this, but would have no idea where to look for it and it would probably involve me getting in my car and going out to my storage unit and pulling every single box out. I turned it into ones an zeros and stuck it on a nondescript black box that could very well be dead. And now it’s not even on YouTube. Sad? Sure, it’s sad.

PEAK EPHEMERA

(phrase stolen from Grifthorse podcast)

Hey, here are some videos I found on YouTube in case you wanna go down a wormhole of watching old Adult Swim commercial breaks. May the gods of posterity keep them online forever:

February 4, 2002

Spring 2002

June 16, 2002

June 30, 2002

July 27, 2002

August 2002

November 17, 2002

November/December 2002

MAIL BAG:

This ends EPHEMERA WEEK. We’ll do actual episodes soon!

What's the scariest thing you seen on adult swim?

I don’t know if I have a real answer for this. I don’t think I actually get scared by stuff in movies or TV shows. I can’t even come up with a funny answer. Remember the end of that Metalocalypse episode where the little sick girl is dead and her eyes turn into maggots and you hear that screechy voice was like I’M DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU!!! I’ll just go with that even though it made me laugh really hard

Ever watch Limmy's Show

I am content just being vaguely aware of Limmy (no, I never watched his show. Seems good).

Please don't do such a big mailbag. I couldn't believe how many r-words wrote inane bullshit to you. Let keep this blog about the real stars: Master Shake, Space Ghost, Brak, Zorak, Meatwad, Frylock, Debbie, Black Debbie, Carl, Sparks, Stormy, Hesh, Moltar, Harvery Birdman Captain Murphy, Dr. Quinn, Paula, Marco, Brendon, Jason, Melissa, The Mooninites, the Plutonians, Peanut, Coach Mc Gurk, Mentok the Mindtaker, Virjay, Antoin, Colby, Trotter, Adair WE ARE THE UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE :)

I can’t believe this IDIOT doesn’t get that by typing such a long message he very IDIOTICALLY contributed to the length of the Maili Bag... LMFAO, what a IDIOT

This is maybe the funniest blog on tumblr. You really think these nasty little cartoons are special, huh?

Hey than-- oh :( Yeah, I guess so :(

would you like master shake if he did the whole thing

I’m sorry what

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #ephemera

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captainbasch · 4 years

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Rainy Days || Caught in the Rain A Rainy Days ych illustration of Maili for @puppytoast ! I always love drawing your babies T 3 T <3

:: character not mine ::

#commission #ych #rainydays #maili #kemonomimi #marigold #illustration

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prettyaverageshitposts · 4 years

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Those who INSPIRE

This post is gonna be a long one but please read it if you have a moment to spare!

Our society is incredibly unjust and racist and things need to change whether you want to admit it or not. Personally, I feel there is no room in this world for such hatred and unfairness. The last few days it's been so empowering watching so many people show their support and solidarity to those who are oppressed in today's society.

That being said, I feel that many people have misunderstood what Blackout Tuesday was meant to be about soI wanted to do something to highlight and celebrate black lives as best as I can.

Unfortunately I'm not in the position in which I can donate. Instead however, I have been sharing links, signing petitions and researching other victims of police brutality who haven't been mentioned, as well as ways in which I can help!

I decided in doing this I would use my knowledge of music to try and create something positive, therefore this post will be highlighting the work of some of my favourite black artists who have inspired not only me but thousands of people across the world!

So here we go...

GARY CLARK JR

Well known for his fusion of rock, blues and hip hop, Gary Clark is an American singer - songwriter and guitarist

Racism made growing up quite tough. He remembers getting dog shit in his mailbox, people writing the n word on the fence outside his parent’s house and others putting confederate flags over his fence on a regular occurrence.

One of my favourite songs by Gary is This Land which he wrote to express what it was like to be a black man living in America, particularly the south.

'"See you looking out your window

Can't wait to call the police on me

Well I know you think I'm up to somethin'

I'm just eating, now we're still hungry

And this is mine now, legit

I ain't leavin' and you can't take it from me"

Here some links to this song and a few others:

This Land

What About Us

Numb

JAMILA WOODS

As a singer-songwriter and poet, Jamela Woods' lyrics are raw yet beautiful. Her music covers many different themes including her black ancestry, black identity and feminism. Her music is often a celebration of self love which I just find so powerful.

One song that really stands out to me is Blk Girl Soldier which points out that the violence inflicted upon black men and women aren’t singular incidents but systematic.

"They want us in kitchen

Kill our sons with lynchings

We get loud about it

Oh now we're the bitches

Look at what they did to my sisters

(Last century last week)

They put her body in a jar and forget her

(They love how it repeats)"

Below is the link to this song as well as a few others:

Blk Girl Soldier

Lately

EARTHA

GEORGE BENSON

Well known as an incredible jazz guitarist, George Benson helped shape jazz, r&b, soul and even funk music and has released over 30 albums since 1964. As an incredibly gifted and unique guitarist he has been asked by other artists to play on many tracks.

A song I've been listening to a lot recently is 'Humility' by Gorillaz which features George's brilliant guitar licks and it is one of the reasons why I love the song so much. Despite its rather depressing lyrics, it makes me feel like I'm lying without a care in the world on a beach with the sun beating down.

"I'm the lonely twin, the left hand

Reset myself and get back on track

I don't want this isolation

See the state I'm in now?"

Here is a link to this song as well as a few others that are equally amazing!

Humility

Nothing's Gonna Change My Love for You

Give Me the Night

FATOUMATA DIAWARA

As a Malian singer-songwriter and actress, Fatoumata Diawara's music blends Wassoulou traditions of Mali with international influences. She sings primarily in Bambara which is the national language of Maili.

Her songs cover a range of topics including the pain of emigration, a need for mutual respect, feninism and the struggles of African women.

Sowa was one of the first songs I ever heard from Fatoumata and I have absolutely loved her music since then. The song is her paean to children who grow up without their parents/without knowing their parents. This was born of her own experience when she was banished at the age of 12 to live with her aunt.

"A y’a denw nyè lajè

Sani olu ka taa nyani na.

A y’a denw nyè lajè yéééé

Ne ko ko sani olu ka taa sègèn na"

Here is the link to listen to Sowa as well as a few other tracks:

Sowa

Manitoumani

Dèsolè

STEVIE WONDER

Stevie Wonder is an American singer, songwriter, musician and record producer. He is also one of the most successful songwriters and musicians in the history of music.

As a bassist, I developed a love for Stevie's music as I began to learn some of the basslines to his songs. There are some of them I still for the life of me cannot play properly *cough cough* the solo in Sir Duke *cough cough*. However, that still doesn't stop me from enjoying them!

One of my personal favourites (mainly for the bassline) is Master Blaster.

"They want us to join their fighting

But our answer today

Is to let all our worries

Like the breeze through our fingers slip away"

Below a link to Master Blaster as well as a few other tracks:

Master Blaster

Sir Duke

Isn't She Lovely

Please feel free to comment some songs you enjoy by the artists I've listed or even some black artists that have inspired you! I'd love to hear about your faves! ❤

#black lives matter #blm #fatoumata diawara #stevie wonder #gary clark jr.#black lives movement #black lives fucking matter #support blm #blm movement #blm protests #gorillaz #jamila woods #black musicians #music #musicians #inspirational figures #inspirational

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fortheheavenssake · 4 years

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PG MM Anon Interpretation Collection - 25

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻PG INTERPRETATION MM ANON🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

171: Jan 16

MM ANON,……… laugh and carry on……… isolation desperation ……… W&K leapfrog ……… not jaw jaw …… pseudo Trudeau ……… re-distribution …………” just scrapping by ,sausage” ……… LA NA. ……… gizza job……… ahhhhh’ the ubiquitous tape……… brotherly shove ………… “ the tour will proceed” ………… Diamond Dogs……… 🦂🦂🦂………… twice shy

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU MM ANON🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

RIDDLE #171

January 16/2020

1835 hrs CST

laugh and carry on

THE ROYAL FAMILY MOTTO HAS BEEN KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON. LIKE A DUCK SERENELY FLOATING ON THE WATER, BUT UNDERNEATH ITS PADDLING LIKE MAD. NOW WITH ALL OF MADAM’S MACHINATIONS AND PHOTOSHOPPING GAMES ONGOING, BESIDES EXPLODING WITH ANGER OR BREAKING DOWN IN TEARS, LAUGHING IS THE BEST RESPONSE. SHE! HATES!🤬🤬🤬🤬BEING! LAUGHED!AT! THERE IS NOTHING MORE A TRUE NARCISSIST LOATHES IS NOT BEING TAKEN SERIOUSLY AND LAUGHED AT. SO PLEASE KEEP THE FUNNY POSTS AND SUBMISSIONS COMING. WE MUST CARRY ON WITH OUR LIVES. IF YOU FEEL CONSUMED STEP AWAY BECAUSE THAT IS GIVING HER YET ANOTHER VICTIM. LAUGH AT HER!

isolation desperation

MADAM HAS GOTTEN EXACTLY WHAT SHE WANTED, ALMOST. SHE WANTS PERMANENTLY RID OF ANY ROYAL DUTIES BUT STATES WANTS FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣SHE HAS NEVER HAD THIS HER WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN ABOUT USING OTHERS OR USING HER BODY FOR MONEY. IT PHYSICALLY SICKENED ME TO SEE HER , A DECLARED FEMINIST, BE SO MISOGYNISTIC AND USE WOMENS SHELTERS OR AT RISK WOMEN CENTRES FOR HER OWN PR AND MERCHING REASONS. GOD SEES YOU RACHEL, HE KNOW THE BLACKNESS IN YOUR SOUL, I SAID I WAS NOT GOING TO PLEAD WITH YOU TO REACH OUT TO GOD BUT I DO , REACH OUT AND RID YOURSELF OF IT! SHE IS SO DESPERATE TO REMAIN RELEVANT AND IN THE TABLOIDS SHE IS DOING ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING, ALL THE WHILE MERCHING AND USING VULNERABLE CANADIAN WOMEN. PEOPLE ARE LIVID!

W&K leapfrog

LEAPFROG IS A SET OF ELECTRONIC INTERACTIVE CHILDRENS BOOKS AND TOYS, EXTREMELY LEARNING BASED AND POPULAR. I THINK THEY USED THE NAME FROM THE OLD CHILDREN’S GAME OF LEAPFROG,WHERE YOU CROUCH AND HOP OVER THE PERSON CROUCHED AHEAD OF YOU. IT WAS GREAT FUN. USING THE JUMP OVER EFFECT, THEY HAVE LEAPFROGGED OVER MADAM IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE. I THINK THERE IS AN INSTAGRAM GAME, I JUST CHECKED AS OF RIGHT NOW THE SUSSEXES HAVE 10.8 MILLION FOLLOWERS AND THE CAMBRIDGES, DRUMROLL PLEASE HAVE 10.9 MILLION.FOLLOWERS. THEY HAVE LEAPFROGGED OVER. WITH A NORTH AMERICAN ROYAL TOUR WITH THE CHILDREN, THAT WILL EXPLODE!!! RIBBIT RIBBIT 🐸 🐸 🐸 🐸 🐸 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣

not jaw jaw

JAW JAW, SEEING THAT REMINDS ME OF THE MUCH MALIGNED JAR JAR BINKS CHARACTER IN STAR WARS. ANNOYING AT FIRST I GREW TO KIND OF LIKING HIM. SERIOUSLY JAW JAW MEANS TO YAMMER ON TALK AT LENGTH , LONG WINDED, POLITICIANS FOR EXAMPLE. THE BARD, “FULL OF SOUND AND FURY SIGNIFYING NOTHING” OF INTEREST, I FOUND THIS QUOTE, YOU KNOW ME YOU GET DINNER AND A SHOW WITH EACH INTERPRETATION 🤣🤣😂😂😂

To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war. ATTRIBUTION: WINSTON CHURCHILL, remarks at a White House luncheon, June 26, 1954. His exact words are not known, because the meetings and the luncheon that day were closed to reporters, but above is the commonly cited version.

SO HMTQ IN HER BRILLIANCE, DESPITE ALL IN FLAMES ABOUT HER, USING PEACEFUL MEASURE STEALTHILY AS WE HAVE SEEN THIS WEEK. MADAM NATTERS ON AND ON, HMTQ SAYS LITTLE BUT OH HOW POWERFUL THE CHOICE OF THOSE WORDS WERE. WELL DONE YOUR MAJESTY.

pseudo Trudeau

OUR PM , FOR ALL HIS FAULTS, IS LOVED BY MILLIONS WHO LOVE HIS FATHER THE SAME DESPITE HIS. PSEUDO IS FALSE. IS OUR PM AND CREW APPEARING TO GO ALONG WITH ALL THIS AT THE REQUEST ON HMTQ AND TO EMBARGO OR NOT BE PUBLIC ABOUT ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE USUAL POLITE CANADIAN STYLE!! HE AND SOPHIE ARE OUR POWER COUPLE AND MADAM HAS WORMED HER OR SOMETHING ELSED HER WAY TO THE HIGHEST ECHELONS OF CANADIAN SOCIETY.

re-distribution

DOES THIS REFER TO HER PATRONAGES AND CHARITIES BEING SPREAD OUT, REDISTRIBUTED AMONGST THE OTHER SENIOR ROUALS, I AM CERTAIN AS SHE HAS VOICED HER WISH TO NOT LIVE OR WORK, 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣, WORK IN THE U.K. I AM CERTAIN THERE IS A GRAND PARTY AMONGST THE THEATRE COMMUNITY OVER BEING RID OF HER AS THEIR PATRON.

just scrapping by ,sausage”

I KNOW SAUSAGE IS PP PET NAME FOR HMTQ BUT I KNOW THIS IS NOT HMTQ JUST SCRAPING BY. IT IS AN INSULT TO MADAM, LIKELY BY PP, TO HER BEING BROKE AND HAVING TO MERCH AND HEAVEN KNOWS IF SHE HAS ACSUGAR DADDY GIVING HER MONEY.

LA NA.

LA IS LOS ANGELES NA IS NOPE. SO SHORT AND SWEET, NO LA FOR NOW!

gizza job

IN THE UK AND SCOTLAND EVERYTHING AND NAMES ESP WERE CHANGED TO A Z SOUND. EXAMPLE MY FRIEND KAREN WAS CALLED KAZ, HARRY HAS BEEN CALLED HAZZA YOU GET IT. GIZZA MEANS GIVE US A JOB, MEANING MADAM NEEDS MONEY AND SHE NEEDS A WAY TO GET A LOT IF IT. SHE IS COMPLETELY UNQUALIFIED FOR ANY WORK SO LETS NOT THINK FURTHER HOW SHE WILL GET WHAT SHE WANTS.

ahhhhh’ the ubiquitous tape

THIS HAS ARISEN AGAIN, ITS BEEN TALKED SBOUT SO MUCH AT ONE POINT WILL IT BE MADE PUBLIC? I AM CERTAIN IT WILL BE WHEN IT CAN DO MAXIMUM DAMAGE TO MADAM AND MINIMUM FOR TO CROWN IF IT IS EVER RELEASED.

brotherly shove

IS WILLIAM GIVING HARRY A SHOT IN THE ARM SO TO SPEAK? HELPING HIM WITH THIS LONG TERM PLAN AND DELAYING HIS LEAVING WITH CONTINUED PUBLIC ENGAGEMENTS? I AM ASSUMING BEHIND THE SCENES THERE IS A LIT IF BROTHERLY COMMUNICATION GOING ON.

“ the tour will proceed”

THE OFFICIAL GO AHEAD FOR THE CAMBRIDGES TO TOUR CANADA! MARVELLOUS!! THIS IS SO EXCITING, I WONDER IF THEY WILL STOP BY MINE??😁😁😁😁 I ALSO WONDER IF AMERICA IS INCLUDED?

Diamond Dogs

KNOWING MM ANONS LOVE FOR HIM I HAVE NO DOUBT SHE IS REFERRING TO WIKI

Diamond Dogs is the eighth studio album by the English musician David Bowie, released on 24 May 1974 by RCA Records. Thematically, it was a marriage of the novel Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell and Bowie’s own glam-tinged vision of a post-apocalyptic world. Bowie had wanted to make a theatrical production of Orwell’s book and began writing material after completing sessions for his 1973 album Pin Ups, but the author’s estate denied the rights.[2] The songs wound up on the second half of Diamond Dogs instead where, as the titles indicated, the Nineteen Eighty-Four theme was prominent. End wiki. SORRY KIDS IT SAVES MY HANDS TYPING.

SO EYES ARE ON MADAM 24/7/366 AS THIS IS LEAP YEAR. GIVEN THE CIRCLES SHE TRAVELLED IN, IN THE MISSING YEARS , CANADA AND MARRIED INTO, I HAVE NO DOUBT SHE IS ON THE RADAR OF THE FIVE EYES AND MI6. SHE REPRESENTS A CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER TO THE MONARCHY, ALONG WITH ALL IF HER BACKERS!

🦂🦂🦂

Lobster 🦞 is this, lobsters mate for life. These are 🦂 scorpions, three of them. SCORPION STINGS ARE EXTREMELY PAINFUL AND TOXIC. HERE WE HAVE THREE SCORPIONS POISED AND READY TO ATTACK, WHO DO THEY REPRESENT?

THE MOS/DAILY MAILY LAWSUIT IS 🦂 NUMBER ONE. TM, DADDY DEAREST IS 🦂 NUMBER TWO. THE COURT JUSTICES, LUMPED TOGETHER ARE 🦂 NUMBER THREE. THEY ARE CLOSE TO THE PATERNITY DECISION AND ANNULMENT OR DIVORCE. I TRULY BELIEVE SOMETHING HAPPENED AT CABADA HOUSE TO MAKE HER SWEET AND ILLICIT THAT SMILE AND THIMBS UP FROM HARRY!!

twice shy

HERE WE HAVE TWICE SHY AGAIN, I WENT THROUGH THE WHOLE ONCE BITTEN TWICE SHY EXPLANATION JUST A FEW DAYS AGO I THINK. HARRY COMING TO CANADA IS BEING DELAYED BY TODAYS RUGBY AND NEXT WEEK HE HAS HIS ROYAL DUTIES. SO HE WAS BITTEN NOW TWICE SHY TO RETURN TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR MADAM.

1950 hrs CST. GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Fantastic! Thank you PG! We so appreciate this! Sounds good!😊💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Ask Skippy submission

—————-

172: waiting for MM anon....

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afallenwolf · 5 years

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WIP of the Campaign I’ve been working on. It’s the same setting Juul and my goblins are in. A Monster filled world where even the Elves and Dwarves look less human.

I’m going to do some alterations to the races, again. Cause i wasn’t happy with the list. Not enough reptiles XD.

But this is also the map of the Rajjara Region. A Human (Haval) city. It’s a mining and farming city so it always has a flow of commerce. Most prominent races are Humans (Haval), Dwarves, kobold slaves and reptile races due to the nearby settlement.

Not sure if I want to add the Brat King here or this area is under his control. I know a bit of the issues he’s caused for the city. Maily his pride-fueled war against the Empire. I’ve got a few other ideas to.

Also need to figure out if I want magic in this world or not.

In any case I hope this post is remotely interesting.

#dnd #dnd campaign #hero slayers

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ifishouldvanish · 6 years

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The Boston Hour (11/?)

In which Belle is an Antiques Roadshow super-fan and Gold is her favorite appraiser.

CHAPTER SUMMARY: Belle and Rumford exchange letters, and a date is set. RATING: T WORDS: 5,018 A/N: TMI's for last chapter here - [x] ...Speaking of which, in a forever ago TMI, Ariel was another appraiser on the show, but I decided to change that (and a few other things) up a bit, seeing as this 'verse has grown so much since then.

[Part One] [Part Two] [Part Three] [Part Four] [Part Five] [Part Six] [Part Seven] [Part Eight] [Part Nine] [Part Ten] [Read on AO3]

Belle stormed back into the library, fuming from her lunch with her father. It figured, that if there was anybody who could drag her down from her post-Rumford high, it would be him.

Why was he like this? Why couldn’t he just be happy and excited for her? And how dare he have the audacity to complain about her not coming to him to talk about her life when he always reacts like this?

“Stupid... stubborn jerk!” Belle muttered under her breath. She plopped into her seat at the circulation desk with a huff and booted up her computer. “Just order the cheeseburger, princess!” she mocked, the keyboard clacking loudly as she logged into the library's management system. “Such a ridiculous, stubborn, rude, pigheaded–”

“You okay there, Belle?”

She stopped typing and spun around in her chair, finding one of the library volunteers standing in the doorway to the back room.

“...Anna.” Belle took a deep breath and put on a smile. “I’m… fine. I’m wonderful. I’m…” she trailed off with a chuckle. “I’m having a great day!” she assured, her voice climbing an octave or two.

Anna stared blankly for a moment, clearly not convinced, and smacked her lips. “...Right. Well, the mail came in while you were out. This one’s addressed to you?” she said dubiously, revealing a large document mailer she’d been holding behind her back.

Belle scoot closer in her wheeled chair and tilted her head at it. “...it is?”

Mail? Addressed to her? And it wasn't just a letter or a bill or something– but a thick packet!

But why would anyone send anything to her? She was just an librarian's assistant. A nobody. It wasn’t like she was the library director, or the administrative assistant, or even the inter-library loan specialist!

...Yet.

Belle shook her head and squared her shoulders. “I mean, of course it is,” she said cooly, tucking her hair behind her ears. “I get mail. From people. You know, I bet it’s um, really important.”

But “Mail! ” the voice in her head screamed! Addressed to her!

This was a milestone, wasn't it? Maybe the branch director had put in a good word about her with the district chair? Maybe they'd decided she was ready for more responsibilities. Maybe her handling of this piece of mail was a test, that if passed, would grant her a promotion to full-fledged librarian!

She cleared her throat and smoothed out her blouse. One had to maintain a stately, dignified appearance in front of the library’s guests and volunteers, after all. How she looked and behaved was a reflection of the library itself, and the last thing the library needed was to give off the impression of being sloppy, disorganized, and an inefficient waste of taxpayer dollars that could be better spent on bronze statues celebrating slave-owning colonists, new benches on Main Street that were too uncomfortable for homeless people to sleep on, or a heightened law enforcement presence to keep the jaywalkers at bay.

“Anyway,” Anna coughed, “It says it’s from…” she checked the return address as she began walking over. “Rumf–”

“Give it to me.” Belle snapped, lunging out of her seat and snatching it from her hands.

“O-kay…” Anna said, giving the envelope a finishing pat where it already sat in Belle's arms. For the effect.

Belle cradled the mailer reverently for a moment, smoothing her hands over it and smiling. She brushed her thumb over the return address, recognizing the handwriting from the names Rumford had scribbled down for her after their appraisal on Saturday. She briefly wondered if he actually had return address labels and specifically elected not to use them in favor of handwriting everything for her. She liked to think so.

“Something exciting?” Anna asked, taking a step closer and leaning forward to see. “What is it?”

"I don’t know what it is.” Belle sighed happily.

“Oh.” Anna shrugged. “I mean, I get excited over junk mail all the time too.” Her eyes suddenly lit up then, and she smiled. “I love it when you get one of those packs of like, fifty postcards that are all coupons for stuff like custom closets and roofing? There’s one for heating and air conditioning that’s my favorite that has a snowman on it with–”

“It’s not junk!” Belle cut in, clutching the mailer against her chest protectively. “It’s from Dr Gold…” she explained with a wistful sigh, her gaze drifting up to the ceiling.

“If you're expecting to ever hear from him again, you're only going to be disappointed,” her father had said! And “Ha! ” she thought!

She ought to invite him over for dinner so she can rub it in his big, stupid face! How wrong he was! Dead wrong! And with this timing? Clearly it was a sign! She and Rumford were a match blessed by the fates themselves!

She let out a squeal and started to pick at the flap of the document mailer with her nails. “Gosh! I wonder what it could be!”

“Oh!” Anna’s eyes widened. “Dr Gold! Is that the guy whose picture you had on your desk and I thought he was your fiancé for the longest time?”

Belle stopped struggling to break the seal on the mailer and huffed. “I did not have his picture on my desk!”

“Yeah you did! It was right next to–”

Belle put a heeled foot down. “I was making a vision board.”

Anna pouted her lips for a moment in thought. “Hm… pretty sure you were planning a wedding.”

Belle gave an indignant huff and dropped into her chair, using her feet to wheel herself back over to the desk so she could grab her letter opener. She had to fight back a smile as she plucked it out from the Be Brave mug that housed her pens, highlighters, and scissors, though– it had been sitting in there, unused, since her very first day at the library. But this day was different. There was change in the air, and what better piece of mail to christen her letter opener with than something from Rumford!

“...It looked nice?” Anna offered.

“It was a Regency theme,” Belle explained, hastily jabbing the envelope with the little blade.

“Ooh. Nice.”

“Because I love Austen and he–” she cut herself off and slammed the letter opener back down.

“Mmhm…” Anna grinned and spun on her heels, disappearing into the back room again.

Belle took a deep breath and returned to the envelope. She felt torn between tearing the the thing to shreds as quickly as possible, versus taking her time and being careful not to damage it. Savoring the moment won out, and as she finished sliding the contents out, she finally laid eyes on the first page– A handwritten letter. From Rumford.

Belle–

I’d first like to say that it was a pleasure meeting you at the event on Saturday, and an even greater pleasure to enjoy your company at the market. I trust you and Miss Lucas had a safe and pleasant trip home to Storybrooke– I must confess that having the blissful memory of our time together so fresh in my mind, made the flight home seem to pass measurably more quickly.

I'm writing you in regards to your book. Enclosed are copies of all the sources on Mailys Desrosiers I have on hand. Most are letters to an unnamed lover, others are addressed to fellow artists and authors, and a few are news clippings mentioning exhibitions she or Les Reines des Ténèbres were involved in. I do hope you might find something illuminating among them. In any case, I look forward to hearing from you again soon.

Warmest regards, Rumford

Belle's heart fluttered in her chest.

Warmest regards.

He could have just said regards, or kind regards, or warm regards, but he wrote warm -est regards. That had to be code for, “I long to set my eyes upon your beautiful face again because ever since that perfect summer afternoon we shared in Boston, not a single moment has passed in which I haven't thought about the unrivaled bliss of feeling your lips against mine.”

Right?

Because if she were to write him a friendly-yet-professional-but-hopefully-someday-much-much-more letter, she would also choose to close it with not just regards, kind regards, or warm regards, but– warmest regards.

She stood up and began pacing around in small circles at her desk, reading the letter again and again. The more she read it, the more she felt like she might float up and away!

He thought about her during his flight!

Fondly!

Belle stopped pacing suddenly and gasped. She'd have to order an archival folder to put his letter in! Or maybe there'd be more letters! She could get a whole archival box! Keep it stowed under her bed! Take it out after a long day and read them all again, imagining Rumford's voice and basking in the sunshine of his love! Then maybe, in a hundred years, their great-grandchildren could read their letters and marvel at the epic romance they shared!

Biting back a smile, Belle finally began eagerly sifting through all the documents in the envelope, finding exactly what he'd described. She scanned over bits and pieces, picking up on words here and there, but she decided she didn't want to spoil anything for herself. Who knew what mysteries they held, what stories they had to share?

No, no– she'd have to sit down after her shift and give them all her undivided attention. After all, Rumford had personally gathered each of these sources for her. The thought made her feel like she might burst. Rumford, printing and copying and compiling these letters and clippings with her and only her in mind.

How romantic!

She took a deep, steadying breath and quickly thumbed through the rest of the papers until a thick card dropped to the floor.

Oh?

She held the stack of papers tightly and dipped down to pluck the notecard off of the carpet. Solid, cream-colored cardstock with a thin, metallic gold trim. Belle smiled and gave a little sigh.

Her man had style. Taste. An eye for details and a flair for the dramatic.

The one side of the card was blank, so she flipped it over. And there, in Rumford's elegant hand, it read:

“The possession of knowledge does not kill the sense of wonder and mystery. There is always more mystery.” ― Anaïs Nin

Suddenly weak in the knees, Belle clutched the pages against her chest and slumped against the wall with a sigh.

Her mother had always told her that love was a mystery to be uncovered. Could it be, that as she and Rumford worked to uncover the mystery of her book and Les Reines des Ténèbres, that they would also uncover the wonder and mystery of each other? She certainly hoped so.

“...H-hello?”

Belle startled with an audible gasp, blinking at the teenage boy waiting on the other side of the circulation desk with a stack of books.

He furrowed his brows. “You okay, lady?”

Belle nodded and beamed a smile. “I’m going to marry him!” she whispered excitedly, poking her finger at the letter in her hand.

“...Um. Okay.” The boy made a confused face, but shrugged, and slid his selections across the counter. “Well, I'm uh, ready to check these out.”

“Right.” Belle chuckled awkwardly and shook her head. “Of course. Let's… check out some books, shall we?” she said, her voice climbing an octave or two again.

Oh, she was going to have to write Rumford back right away.

*****

A letter from Belle.

He'd become downright giddy when he checked the mail at the shop and found it tucked between an assortment of bills and solicitations. He'd carried it all over to his desk in the back room, eased into his chair, and delicately swept his letter opener along the envelope, relishing in the crisp sound it made as the blade cut through the paper. The whole process, typically so ordinary and thoughtless, titillated him now.

He plucked the letter out delicately, as if unwrapping a precious gift– and he supposed that in a sense it was– Because this letter was from Belle. He had to force his eyes not to read faster than his mind could process the words. To partake in the details of Belle's penmanship, her taste in stationery, her beautiful, beautiful words.

She thanked him for sending all those sources pertaining to her book and for showing her such a lovely time. (But oh, the pleasure had been all his!) Expressed her hope that he and Neal were doing well. (She remembered Neal!) Described how delighted she had been to receive his letter and how she sought to return the favor. (She did!) Alluded to the sorts of things they might do together when he visited Storybrooke (When! Not if!)

She closed the whole thing, “Thinking of us still, Belle” with a little heart next to her name, and goodness– she was such a bold, cheeky thing, wasn't she? While adrift on Cloud Nine, Rumford almost didn't notice the notecard that was tucked inside the envelope. A due date card from her library, in fact– and how charming a detail it was!

“The mind is not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled.” –Plutarch

A smile tugged at Rumford's lips as he read the card again and again.

Had she put as much care into selecting this quote as he had? Was she implying that he kindled the fire of her mind? And maybe, dare he hope, the flame within her heart?

He flipped the card between his fingers, and had he blinked he'd have missed it, but oh! There was more! The scribbled words, “...if you can make it,” framed inside a heart. He creased his brows, baffled until he finally read the heading on the card, and noticed the single date stamped into the first cell.

Please return by: AUG 12 2017

August twelfth? That was the weekend after his next Roadshow event in Richmond! She was planning their first rendez-vous– and it was such a pleasant surprise, wasn't it? In all his eagerness to do the romancing, he hadn't even considered the possibility of how delightful it might be to be romanced himself! He felt positively buoyant!

Rumford set the card down and wet his lips, trying to school the smile from his face. He was becoming more mindful of them now, after several people had pointed out a change in his demeanor. They'd poke and prod, bait him with a, “looks like somebody's having a good day today, huh?” and he'd just shrug and make some comment about how blissful the weather was, how perfect his cup of tea had been that morning, or how every day was a blessing when one really thought about it.

Sure, he could sing from the mountaintops his adoration for Belle– but it was such a new, exciting thing, and he intended to keep it somewhat of a little secret a while longer.

They were like two young lovers in a Fragonard painting, he fancied. Exchanging letters, arranging plans to meet in a lush garden at sunset where they might enjoy a romantic stroll without the prying eyes of a chaperone. Where he could murmur fanciful things into Belle's ear, and watch her cheeks deepen to match the color of the roses that surrounded them. Where the two of them could steal kisses from one another while a moss-covered statue of Venus and Cupid kept watch.

Oh, yes. This budding thing of theirs was so very Rococo, wasn't it? And now he was smiling again.

He looked across the back room to the workbench where Ariel was situated, repairing a jeweled brooch. Cleared his throat. “Miss Halloran?”

“...Yes?” she acknowledged him a little belatedly, not taking her eyes off of her work.

“How would you feel about… running the shop for me sometime in the next two or three weeks? I'm thinking… the eleventh through the fourteenth.”

“Yeah. Sure.” she shrugged, and Rumford could see her deft little hands continuing to work. “...Why though? I thought the tour was over after next week.”

“It is.” he nodded. “But– I might like to do a bit of traveling.”

She set her needle file down and held the brooch up, examining her work. “Oh yeah? Where to?”

Rumford wet his lips and drummed his fingertips on his desk. “...Storybrooke.”

“Never heard of it.”

“Little town in Maine.”

“Estate sale?”

Rumford fidgeted in his seat a little, his cheeks suddenly hot.

Oh, to say or not to say? The simple truth, “actually, I’ve a date with charming young woman,” bubbled inside him, nearly boiling over. But no, no– this would stay between only he and Belle for now.

...And Neal.

...And David.

He smacked his lips, grinning again. “Something like that.”

After a moment, Ariel released an exasperated sigh and see the brooch back down. “You have appointments booked, though.” she reminded him, picking up her pliers and file again. “We’ll have to reschedule those clients.”

Bugger! Clients! Of course!

If only there were somebody else whose passion for antiques matched his own. Someone whose expertise he recognized. Someone he could trust, who had established some kind of rapport with him. Someone who was looking for an opportunity to demonstrate what they were truly capable of, so that they might achieve a higher level of self-actualization. Oh, wait.

“...Not if you see the clients yourself.” Rumford suggested, keeping his tone nonchalant.

“Huh?”

“I'd like for you to handle the appointments. Write up the estimates and the valuations.” he explained, watching for her reaction. “I'll be back in time to review your work– though based on the quality of the reports you've done for me so far, I'm sure that should hardly be necessary.”

Ariel finally stopped working and looked over her shoulder at him, green eyes gleaming. “Really?”

“Aye. I think… well, I think you're ready to start taking on more responsibilities here.” Rumford said, and he leaned back in his chair, a proud smile tugging at his lips.

Ah, yes. It was almost strange to think that a mere three years ago, Miss Halloran was just a frequent window shopper. She'd come in with no shortage of questions about the many gadgets and gizmos that adorned his shelves, often lingering until it was time for him to lock up. Before he knew it, she was helping him do watch repairs– holding this for a second, handing him that– all the while describing the various bits and bobs she'd seen at thrift stores, asking his opinion on any pieces she had her eye on but wasn't sure about.

Offering Miss Halloran a job had been a no-brainer, he thought, and he could feel his eyes watering and his smile widening. Under his instruction, she'd grown from a wayward weekend hobbyist into a seasoned expert– ready for anything the vibrant and ever-changing world of antiques and appraising might throw her way. Oh, yes. Miss Halloran had once been a wee baby bird, but now she was ready to spread her wings and fly. How proud he was, to have nurtured such a promising young talent in his own shop! And she wasn't much unlike himself, now was she? Come to think of it, if ever he had a daughter, he imagined she might be–

Rumford discreetly wiped a lone tear from the corner of his eye and cleared his throat. “A-and should things work out– your pay, of course, would be adjusted appropriately.” he tacked on, hunching over his desk and feigning a renewed interest in the mail. The bills and solicitations, that is– his interest in Belle's letter was far from feigned.

“You mean like, a promotion?” Ariel asked.

“Aye.” He neatened the documents on his desk and looked up at her with another smile– much more restrained, this time. “From restorations assistant to ah… restorations manager.”

Ariel let out a squeal and leapt out of her seat. “Yes!” she cheered and rushed over to his desk. “I mean– of course! Whatever you need, Mr Gold– you can count on me!”

He chuckled softly at her enthusiasm. “You've been a very valuable asset, Miss Halloran. The work you do does not go unnoticed.”

“Thank you.”

“I'll… move forward with my plans, then.” he said, idly tapping a finger on his postcard from Belle. “And Miss Halloran?”

“Yes, Mr Gold?”

He glanced over to the open door that led to the sales floor, catching the younger of his two employees leaning against the frame. Her fingers tapped rapidly at her phone screen, and the smile and blush on her face were all too familiar to him now. They were no doubt the same smile and blush he was guilting of wearing himself these days.

“Maybe start showing Tilly the ropes next week.” he said quietly. "Let her shadow you on jewelry and watch repairs, and have her read some of the appraisals we've done in the past– perhaps the Horner set we did last year. See which side of things she might be inclined towards."

“Ooh... an apprenticeship?” Ariel whispered.

“Exactly.” Rumford said. “She's a bright young lady, and I believe… her potential lies far beyond the cash register.”

*****

- Two Weeks Later -

Rumford took several deep breaths once he finished making his reservation over the phone. Belle hadn't been exaggerating when she'd told him that Miss Lucas’ grandmother owned the inn in town– All his Googling quickly revealed that it was the only inn in town. It was a charming thing though, he'd decided once he saw a picture of it– a remarkable example of the British Arts and Crafts style that he looked forward to seeing in person.

A voice he could only assume belonged to ‘Granny’ had answered his call, but Ruby's more familiar voice quickly intercepted once he'd given his name. She assured him that he'd be given the nicest room they had– and that the walls were very thick and well-insulated, in case he was wondering. The furniture was apparently very sturdy as well (the bed frame, in particular), though Rumford couldn't understand her confused reaction when he told her that should hardly come as a surprise– assuming the furnishings were all period-appropriate for a home built in 1910. You really couldn't beat the quality craftsmanship of the Arts and Crafts movement, after all.

With that out of the way, it was time to plan his outfits. He hadn't worried about his wardrobe back in Boston, as he simply had to make do with what he had. But now? He had his whole wardrobe at his disposal, and was it silly that he wished he could call his aunties?

Auntie Edith... she'd tell him, “We may not be a churchgoing family, but that doesn't mean we can't dress like one. You put on a nice, white, pressed shirt and tie, Rum! Shine your shoes! And don't forget to shave! If you haven't a fiver for the barber, you let me know! I'll not have our boy going out looking like a dirty ragamuffin!”

And Auntie Ainsley would surely say something like, “Oh, give the lad a break, Edith! All the boys are wearing it long these days!” Then she'd lean in and whisper to him, “You don't have to be such a stiff, Rum– I say, sod the tie and undo a button or two! Gotta give the birds a little taste, eh?”

But– “He doesn't need to be giving anyone a little taste of anything!” Edith would argue. “He's a handsome boy.” She’d say, and then she’d turn to him and cup his face in her hands. “You're a very handsome young man, Rum."

“Please!” Ainsley would laugh. “You gave me way more than ‘a little taste’ on our first date!”

“Oh, don't you be crass in front of our Rumford!” Edith would shoot back, making some vain attempt to cover his ears. "You're gonna make him rotten!"

“I'm no’ being crass!” Edith would groan. “...Nothin’ crass about havin’ a good time, you hear?” she’d add in another whisper, giving him a wink and a nudge with her elbow.

Rumford found himself smiling and shook his head. Perhaps it was actually for the best that he couldn't ask for his aunties’ advice. There were just some things a man had to do on his own, weren't there? And it wasn't as though he didn't know how to dress himself! He knew how to put a suit together! He just needed to decide which suit would be his ‘date with Belle’ suit!

His eyes swept back and forth over the meticulously arranged hangers in his wardrobe. The black suits at the end, fading into charcoal in the middle, and navy on the other end. He kept lingering on one in particular– a not-quite-black one, with pinstripes. Oh, that one was his favorite. He didn't get many opportunities to wear it though, as it was a bit showy– a little too showy to wear to work. But for a date? It could be just right.

He took it down and laid it neatly across the bed, then returned to his closet to choose another. This time, he chose a solid black suit. One could never go wrong with a nice black suit with a classic, tailored fit, could they? The pinstriped suit was the suit of a bold and confident man. But this one was suit of a man who needed to feel bold and confident. It was conservative, safe, comfortable, familiar. The sort of suit that made the man, and not the other way around.

He repeated the process with his shirts, his ties, his pocket squares– his options for each garment narrowed by his choices for the others– until it came time to decide which outfit he ought to wear the day he arrived in Storybrooke. It would be the first time Belle saw him since Boston, and he wanted to look perfect. Give a good impression. Put his best foot forward.

Rumford felt a mild bit of relief when he walked down the hall and found his son's bedroom door was open. He was lying on his bed, tapping away at his phone, so Rumford cleared his throat and waited at the threshold.

Neal paused and glanced at him.

“Which do you think?” he asked, holding up the two outfits he'd narrowed his options down to, each with a coordinating tie draped around the hanger. In his right hand, he held his black suit with a shirt in a muted burgundy, and a navy tie and pocket square. In his left was the pinstriped suit. He'd paired it with a hot pink shirt, a black tie that had a matching pink windowpane print, and a black pocket square with a brightly colored trim.

One conservative option, and one bolder one.

Neal narrowed his eyes for a moment. “Hmm… I think the pink.”

Rumford smiled. “Aye? Y-you don't think it's too much? Not too flashy?”

His son tilted his head as though he were piecing together a Cubist painting. “Eh… I mean maybe, but the other one is so… serious. You're going on a date, pop– not attending a funeral.”

“Well, what about my purple shirt? You know, the–”

“The one that looks exactly like every other shirt you have, only it's purple? Yeah, I think know the one.” Neal deadpanned.

Rumford rolled his eyes and huffed.

“No, they're both nice. But I like the pink, dad. It's… bold. It's... got a little razzle-dazzle.”

“Well, I don't wannae look like a tosser, either!”

“She won't think you look like a tosser!” Neal said. “Besides– I think Jefferson liked it when you wore the pink…” he added, wiggling his brows.

Rumford swallowed and looked at the floor. “What ah, wh-what makes you say that?” he asked, turning the pink ensemble around and holding it up– both so that he could look at it again and hide his blushing cheeks behind it.

Ridiculous. He hadn't been face to face with Jefferson in over two years! Hell, up until a few weeks ago, he hadn't even realized he was ever attracted to the man in the first place– and yet here he was, blushing like a schoolboy at the mere mention of his name!

It was nonsense. Emotional clutter. Previously unchanneled energy belatedly expending itself. Rumford knew his heart only beat for one person these days, and that her name was Belle French.

“Look, I don't even know what you're asking me for anyway,” Neal shrugged. “You dress way better than I do.”

“Well, there's an understatement…” Rumford mumbled under his breath, glancing pointedly at his son's ripped jeans, faded band t-shirt, and hoodie that had become stretched from too many washings.

Teenagers these days! Where was their pride? Back when he'd gotten his first paycheck, the first thing he did was buy himself a new suit! Gods, how tempting it was to just grab his son by the ear and drag him to the tailor! On some level, he’d always understood Auntie Edith's fears about him looking like a ragamuffin, but now? Now he felt it. His own son! A pathetic-looking little street urchin!

“Just wear the pink.” Neal said.

Rumford blinked stammered for a moment. “Th-the pink?”

“Yeah.” he shrugged. “Girls love it when dudes wear pink. It says like, I’m confident enough that I don't think wearing a girly color is a threat to my masculinity, you know?”

Rumford wrinkled his nose. “...What? Why would wearing a color–”

“I don't know!” Neal blurted, throwing his hands up. “I didn't singlehandedly codify gender in the Western world!”

He let out a deep sigh. “So pink?”

“Pink.” Neal decided.

“You're cert–”

“Oh my God, pop.” he groaned and rolled his eyes. “Just wear the pink!”

“Okay!” he said. “The pink! The pink.”

Yes. The pink shirt with his pinstriped suit. Rumford only hoped that when the day came, he’d have to confidence to pull it off.

A/N: Heyoo~ I have Rumford's stay in Storybrooke outlined, but if there's anything specific y'all would like to see, let me know and I'll see if I can work it in :)

#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #fic: the boston hour

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shankarjaikishanfansassnintl · 3 years

Text

Five decades of ‘Mera Naam Joker’: Epic timelessness

By Rajiv Vijayakar

ON 18TH DECEMBER 1970, MERA NAAM JOKER HIT THE SCREEN. IT WAS A PATH-BREAKING FILM AND STORYLINE AT THE TIME. COMMERCIALLY, IT DID NOT DO WELL, BUT WITHIN THE NEXT FEW YEARS, IT CAME TO BE RANKED AS A CLASSIC. TODAY, BUT FOR THE ECONOMIC ASPECT, WHICH MIGHT HAVE GONE WORSE, FANS EVEN WONDER WHY THIS SWEEPINGLY MAJESTIC EPIC WAS NOT MADE IN 70MM, AS RAJ KAPOOR HAD STARRED, JUST THREE YEARS BEFORE IT, IN INDIA’S TILL-THEN ONLY 70MM FILM, AROUND THE WORLD.Here is a fact file about the epic and timeless classic.*In those times, multi-star films were unknown. There had been only two examples on a big scale, Mother India (1957) and Waqt (1965), the latter film originally planned by B.R. Chopra with Prithviraj Kapoor and his three sons, Raj himself, Shammi and Shashi Kapoor! This made Mera Naam Joker the biggest multi-star film until then.*Rajendra Kumar, Dharmendra and Manoj Kumar starred in it besides Raj. And there were three heroines—Padmini. Simi Garewal and Russian actress Kseniya Ryabinkina, later seen in the 2009 Rishi Kapoor film Chintuji.*The movie had two intervals—one of the only two movies to have them in Hindi movie history, and was 25 reels and 255 minutes long. Its international version on DVD is 233 minutes long, while the Indian DVD is just 184 minutes. The only other movie with two intervals (not in all prints though) was Sangam, the film produced and directed by Raj Kapoor just before Mera Naam Joker.*Rishi Kapoor made his screen debut as the adolescent version of his father’s character. Raj Kapoor had wanted to cast elder son Randhir Kapoor in this role, but he did not lose enough weight!*The music was a chartbuster even though the film fared poorly at the box-office: those were the days a music score had a separate quality-based fate from the parent film!*However, Lata Mangeshkar’s absence was keenly felt and even sensed, as she had had a tiff with Raj Kapoor as well as Shankar after Sangam. Jaikishan, who had split from Shankar by then (both composed separately here), was still working with Lata.*Lyricist Hasrat Jaipuri revealed that a third verse for his classic ‘Jaane Kahaan Gaye Woh Din’ was written by him but not used. Mukesh loved it and would often incorporate it when performing at a live concert.*The film won the Filmfare awards for Best Music (Shankar-Jaikishan), Male Playback (Manna Dey), Cinematography (Radhu Karmakar), Sound Recording (Allauddin) and above all for Raj Kapoor as the Best Director.*Manna Dey and Raj Kapoor also won the National awards for that year.*Rishi Kapoor is the only big star to have won a National award for his acting debut, apart from Amitabh Bachchan a year earlier. By a coincidence, they are the only stars in 2019 from that generation who are still relevant. But the tangy part was that Rishi won the National Best Child Actor award!*Rishi Kapoor has a standout memory of when he won this award. “I showed my father the trophy and he told me to take it to my grandfather Prithviraj Kapoor. My grandfather began weeping. and just when I was wondering why, he said something that I did not understand then, “Aaj Raj ne mera karzaa utaar diya (Today, my son has paid his debt to me)!”*Incidentally, Raj’s character in the film was called Ranbir Raj, his real name, and his grandson and Rishi’s son Ranbir now carries his name as well. *Two stalwarts from the RK cinematic household—Mukesh and Shailendra—were a part of the team, sharing credits with their debut-making sons,*Nitin Mukesh and Shaily Shailendra. The senior Shailendra had passed away in 1966, but his song (Raj Kapoor always kept a bank of songs), ‘Jeena Yahaan Marna Yahaan’ was used, completed by Shaily.*‘Wish Me Luck As You Wave Me Goodbye’, a song by Phil Park and Harry Parr-Davies, first sung during the Second World War by Gracie Fields, was used with a romantic implication between the married teacher Simi Garewal and student Rishi Kapoor in the film. The chorus song had Rishi’s portiosn sung by Nitin Mukesh! Nitin Mukesh was to later sing more than once for Rishi Kapoor, notably in the chartbuster ‘Zindagi Ka Naam Dosti’ in the 1987 Khudgarz.*Mukesh himself gave playback for ‘Teetar Ke Do Aage Teetar’, the only song he sang for Rishi, Raj Kapoor’s son and the next generation Kapoor.*Manoj Kumar has revealed, “For the first chapter that starred Rishi Kapoor, Simi Garewal and me, I also worked with Raj Kapoor-ji as a writer – the solah baras concept and philosophy were mine, and Raj-ji was big-hearted enough to mention to many people in the film industry that I had a hand in shaping the screenplay.”*Dharmendra, who played the circus owner in the film, has let on that he would stand outside RK Studios as a struggler, wondering when he would get a chance to even enter the premises! Later, as a star, he had requested Raj to give him an opportunity to work with him, and Rishi Kapoor recollected that the then-big star had taken a much lower fee than his market-rate. As Dharmendra put it, “It was a dream come true. I was not only acting with Raj-saab but also under his direction, which was a chance very few others got!”*Raj Kapoor gave the names of these two leading men, as well as of Rajendra Kumar and Dara Singh, in the ‘Acknowledgement’ credits of the movie, for this gesture at accepting smaller roles.*The film was released in Russia (Raj Kapoor’s international citadel, so to speak, since the 1951 Awara) in three separate parts, and was such a hit that, inflation adjusted to times today, the three chapters did a combined business of over Rs 840 crore!*The financial crisis that Mera Naam Joker landed Raj Kapoor in finally made him produce his modestly-budgeted record-smashing Bobby, in 1973, his biggest hit ever as producer, His biggest hit as a director came in 1985 with Ram Teri Ganga Maili.*Nevertheless, what is most important is that Raj Kapoor declared Mera Naam Joker as his favourite film.

#Mera Naam Joker #Shankar Jaikishan #Raj Kapoor #Padmini #Shailendra #rishi kapoor #Simi #Manoj Kumar #Dharmendra #Rajendra Kumar #Hasrat Jaipuri

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