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#so he took responsibility for everything
coffincanary · 1 year
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I keep thinking about just how Dean can't deal with failure. At all.
And it's not just failure, it's not being good enough in general.
It has been installed into Dean from when he was a child that failure was not acceptable. In their line of work, with their stakes, it was simply no option to make mistakes. If Dean didn't protect Sammy well enough, Sam might actually get hurt. If Dean did something wrong during a hunt, someone might die. If he disobeyed or got out of line, he might have to face disappointing his father.
Dean never got told that it was okay to make mistakes. He wasn't allowed to fail, because there were always severe consequences for it.
I feel like that'd eventually manifest in him obsessing over being perfect. Finding quickest and most effective way to kill any monster (because what if it got away? What if it hurt someone while Dean was fumbling?) Saving on ammunition by becoming the best possible shot (because what if they run out? What if they actually need the bullets but don't have enough because Dean wasted them?)
Dean obsesses over how everything could go wrong and as a result, tries his hardest to become the best hunter, the best protector. And if he fails, it's his fault. There is no "There's nothing that could have been done". Because Dean could have simply been better.
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starflungwaddledee · 6 months
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offering three cookies 🍪🍪🍪
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(<< part 1)
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Bruce you make me so ill (Batman #416)
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travalerray · 4 months
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I am going to slap you myself
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adamanteine · 11 days
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many thoughts about shams being able to sympathize with her mother but still being angry at her father (and having this one part of her that isn't able to forgive him) despite the fact that she is much closer to her father
#ethnic oldest daughter things!#her relationship with her mother is strained#yes!#but even tho shams feels a very good connection to her father due to the fact that he actually acted like a father#she feels angry at almost everything#at the fact that she lost her wings bc of the feud her father has#which deep down shams can understand is not entirely his fault#but its not something she can control#so even though her and her father spend a lot of time together and she trust him greatly there is still this part of her that cannot do it#100%...... she loves him YES but she is angry with him#i wouldnt say her relationship with him is bad in any way tho just a bit more complicated#and then you have her mother#who never actually acted like a mother#who just did her responsibilities without the actual motherly aspect of caring#who had her life ruined due to the misogyny of their society#and decided to reflect that same misogyny unto shams#(which took shams some time to genuinely be able to get rid off and make a choice for herself)#but she???? understands where her mother is coming from#she's helped so many women in her lifetime that she understands enough of what they go through in a society like theirs#and she knows her father may have been a good father but he was not a good husband#so any time she thinks of her mother its more sadness than anger#bc she wants so bad for them to have a better relationship#but at some points she also had to step back bc of how draining dealing with her is#but she understands in the end!!! where her mother is coming from#sorry i'm listening to ethel cain i'm just insane rn#&̲.   ¹   out of character.
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coquelicoq · 2 months
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one important thing about work emails is that whoever you send them to can forward them to anyone else, or reply to you and copy other people. so if you're going to talk about a third party in your email, only say things you would be okay with the third party reading. because people can and will just suddenly CC brand new people on a long email chain, who will then be able to backread anything you've ever said in any of your previous responses that you were sending to only one person. word to the wise.
#i mention this because this just happened to me today BUT it was fine because i already do this#i was writing to client A and mentioned client B who has been making both of our lives harder#but because it's my policy never to trash talk one client to another client (they all know each other btw)#(and some of them are contractors for others of them)#the thing that i said about client B was not something i had to then regret a few days later#when client A for some fucking reason CC'd client B in her response to me#i worded it like 'i'm sorry this has been so hectic and last-minute. it took me a while to understand what client B wanted.'#which has the virtue of being true and also not denigrating client B in any way even though what i meant was#'client B has been so confusing in everything he has said to me that i couldn't give you any advance warning'#but i didn't SAY that. so we're golden#the thing is you will be SO tempted SO often to tell someone that something is a third party's fault#because it will often be a third party's fault!!!!! but you must resist every time. especially in writing#<-this is not universal advice bc sometimes you need to stand up for yourself or whatever. i just mean in venting situations#no venting to clients about other clients. sometimes you need to vent with them in order to build rapport and get them to see you as#an ally rather than an obstacle but you cannot vent ABOUT other people. they can do it but you can't. you have to find other things#to vent about#my posts
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totopopopo · 9 months
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Okay I made this to represent a specific event but then I thought about it and realized that more generally soeaking this actually sums the exact dynamic I have with my fourth grade girls.
#like you guys don’t understand this is LITERALLY me and my girls#like. the example this was originally made to represent. I road the bus with [name redacted for privacy reasons] who is the apple of my eye#my incredible little girl who I have known for a year who I just adore.#I was taking the bus with her and she saw there was a security camera and asked about it. and it was like a 30 minute bus ride we had time#and I often will teach her about things I’m interested in even if they’re like. advanced right#so I was like alright have you ever heard of a man named Foucault?#i took the next 15 minutes to explain to her about who Foucault was and his essay about the panopticon and what that meant#described was a panopticon was described why he was talking about it talked about how that applies to us now#about how the police state is increasingly harnessing more and more technology to create an era of surveillance hitherto unknown of#and how this helps enforce the status quo etc.#she listened intently. nodding along thoughtfully. she quietly thought about it longer.#the whole time. GLOWERING. which is her response to everything.#I’m like. it’s interesting right? trying to prompt her to say what she was thinking.#instead of responding she just turns to the security camera at the front of the bus and very carefully puts up her middle finger#and then mouths ‘fuck. you.’#I could not be prouder of her but this is also just how all our conversations go#no matter if it’s about tattoos or Ancient Greek tragedy or Taylor swift.
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dredshirtroberts · 8 months
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i have acquired a mystical and powerful ointment (hydrocortisone cream) from the village herbalist (rite aid) to assist with the curse set upon my bloodline from many generations ago (eczema)
#feel free to reblog#ironically this is the one thing i know the least about and it's the one i've known about for sure for the longest#never seen a doctor for it (everything online says you probably should) because my parents never took me#they told me that's what it was because that's what my dad had and it looked close enough#they also said i'd grow out of it like my dad did (just as he was growing back into it hmmmmm)#so i'm not like shocked that this is cropped up again i'm mostly like. annoyed? and sad.#i'm annoyed because like - they treated it so casually it was a non issue#get some anti-itch cream moisturize etc#and be quiet about it until it goes away#so it came back every now and then and i stopped telling them i was getting flare ups i'd just get into dad's cortizone and put some on#until it went away#there was never like a plan or a regimine in place for how to deal with it#dad's whole routine was preventative (lots and lots of baby oil) with the steroid cream you pick up at the pharmacy if there was a flare#and i didn't even know when he'd get a flare because it never got brought up - so i didn't know to look for patterns or anything#and now it's hitting me and has been for probably longer than i realized and i'm just like#*how do i take care of this???* *why is it not going away???*#and like yes i absolutely should also still see a doctor about it just to like. Fucking get shit in my records#jesus christ the realization that eczema isn't even probably in my medical records fucking hell#IT'S IMPORTANT BECAUSE IT'S AN IMMUNE RESPONSE AND DOCTORS PROBABLY NEED TO KNOW I'VE GOT A FUCKY IMMUNE SYSTEM IF THAT'S A THING#LIKE CHRIST IN HEAVEN MOM AND DAD A TRIP TO THE DOCTOR IS LIKE NORMAL FOR SMALL CHILDREN#FOR FUCKS SAKE WHY DID I NEVER SEE A DOCTOR AS A CHILD FUCKING MARY MOTHER OF GOD MA WHAT THE FUCK
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Using this as an audio reference for the posts I'm making, but to summarize:
Yuri starts out mad.
Yuri tries to calm himself down with a deep breath to ask for details instead of going through it angry.
Flynn doesn't say "like a good knight" in the sense of putting himself down. He simply says "as a knight" (the tl here doesn't use that, but with that included it's basically along the lines of "even though I had doubts, as a knight, I was determined to follow my orders").
Once Yuri has answers he calms down significantly.
Yuri uses " 'ttaku", which is a shortened down version of "mattaku" (Yuri often shortens words and speaks very casually), which in this particular situation basically would mean "geez", or "good grief". In this manner, it's expressive of exasperation/frustration/etc.
Yuri never mentions that "Flynn told him what to do" like the dub does (because in fact Flynn did not ever tell Yuri what to do. He only gave Sodia and his other knights orders. He expressed his own desire to take responsibility, but never told Yuri and his friends what to do).
At this point you can tell the anger has gone out of him and that he's calmed down, now that Flynn is approaching this with admission and responsibility.
Sodia is asking that Flynn returns as soon as possible (I believe this was a general translation error).
Flynn's thank you to Yuri is tonally much more heartfelt.
Yuri's response and gratefulness at Flynn coming back to himself is tonally much more heartfelt, relieved and sincere.
#GTF Vesperia Clips#basically the dub version is littered with errors /and/ your regular resident angry dub Yuri#just to be clear on mattaku it can also mean ''completely'' ''totally'' ''seriously'' etc. it depends on the context#''yare yare'' is also used for ''geez'' and ''good grief'' but in a more sarcastic/casual way#''mattaku'' or in this case '' 'ttaku'' is more of a quiet expression of exasperation rather than smth you'd yell/shout when aggravated#it CAN sometimes be used like damn as a minor expletive but tbh I personally I wouldn't put it in this situation#bc his aggravation is lessening and they're getting to the point so I'd argue it's more just exhausted of the whole thing#but the dub took it a step further and used it as fuel against Flynn as they do mcfuckin' do#I'd say it's more ''damn it'' at the whole situation bc there's absolutely no reason at this point to say ''damn it Flynn''#esp bc that led into the dub having Yuri go at him accusing him of telling them what to do when he... literally did not#and did not even imply he was going to. it was just pulled from their asses and/bc Yuri never even said Flynn's name there#it's stuff like this where they add remove and change things always in stark opposite of Flynn's favor that riles me up :/#what I mean is that the dub changed Yuri's overall exasperation into smth accusatory when rly Yuri is like#stop trying to do this by yourself. it was never about oh woe is me how dare you tell us what to do#if he was directing a ''damn it'' at Flynn it STILL would not be bc ''he told them what to do''#it would STILL BE because Flynn was trying to take this responsibility fully onto himself#it's so irritating bc the dub will be spot on right on point with everything but then AS SOON as it's abt Flynn it's like#they start messing around with things and the tl is changed and yadda yadda until around late arc 2#it like lowkey comes across as enemy to ally instead of ally with a whole character arc#and the reason I legit feel like they did it on purpose is BECAUSE they can obviously tl correctly based on other areas of the game#but when Flynn is involved they tweak things if not just outright change the context (remember my Nordopolica post? yeahhhh)#how is that not on purpose? how is it that everything can be spot on for a chunk all at once#but then a certain char shows up and it's repeatedly inaccurate? repeatedly geared in a negative light that originally didn't even EXIST?#and then ofc they almost always use Yuri himself to reflect that negativity against Flynn which is a WHOLE other story/issue for me#it's like... say I wrote a neutral statement. someone comes along and tls with negative sounding additions. it's sort of like that#I'm not that good at explaining things/how I feel abt things but yeah I hope that makes sense#it's just like... I KNOW they can tl spot on so when I keep seeing them stick in all these things with/against Flynn it upsets me sm#it feels like they tl normally and then see Flynn and go oh hold on let's change that bc it's Flynn#and that's why it's so frustrating for me :/
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hamable · 9 months
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WATCHING THE NEW MENTOPOLIS EPISODE 4 AND IM LIKE 20 MINUTES IN BUT IM RIGHT I THINK IM FUCKING RIGHT IM SOLVINF YOUR PUZZLE, PUZZLE MAN!!!!!!!!!
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piplupod · 6 months
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people defending their precious white man of the week and ignoring BIPOC pointing out his racism Yet Again. i'm so tired. i'm so tired. i'm so tired!!!!!!
#im literally shaking right now im so fucking mad#''he's not racist what are u talking about show me proof''#[one google later] oh wow i found all this proof with literally one attempt at googling. crazy. i wonder why u couldnt find that on ur own#and then they say ''no he said this thing so its fine :)'' i go look at the thing. it is white saviourism. again. as always#''he's keeping the culture alive :)'' he is twisting it beyond recognition actually. he just took it and ran with it.#and now he's trying to cover his ass!#and white ppl will just eat that shit up lmfao.#''wow what a mature response'' says his adoring audience and his response is literally just ''i can do what i want bc im white''#i will not get involved in the replies of a post. but man. i'm fucking livid. literally shaking right now.#im so fucking tired of anti-indigenous racism being brushed aside like it doesnt matter#yall just bulldozed us all over and then tried to wipe us out when we didnt respect yall and now you continue to fuck us over#and then get upset when we try to say we would like A FEW THINGS TO OURSELVES. INCREDIBLE#the white ''i need access to everything all the time no matter what'' attitude is SOOOO blatant#this isnt even going into his antisemitism lmfaoooo#literally a list a mile long and ppl still plug their ears and close their eyes and yell LALALALA IM NOT LISTENINGGGG#also here's your necessary ''not all white people''. i know. i'm aware. theres some good ones sure but they shouldnt need to be coddled#and reassured every time somebody complains about white people general behaviour. let me complain!!! its a pattern of behaviour!!#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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naemors · 1 year
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I AM GOING TO EAT JASON AARON ALIVE, I WILL FEAST ON HIS BONES AND BEAT HIM OVER THE HEAD WITH HIS OWN FUCKIN LEG-
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ereh-emanresu-tresni · 7 months
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morethanwords0475 · 7 months
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I remember when we had to submit a huge coursework, my supervisor uploaded an earlier draft of mine to another inbox first, so when I submitted the final one, the plagiarism check score was super high. A few days later, C told me jokingly that I gave him a heart attack when he saw my similarity score. He said he sat with our head of year and personally looked through the entire similarity report until they were sure the other draft was actually mine too.
I didn't know he checked things like this, and I certainly didn't expect him to read through my whole essay. It was long before we ever became 'close', but I found it kind of sweet and always remembered.
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aeide-thea · 2 years
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mostly i try to stay chipper but like. sometimes it's just acutely apparent that yr the end product of literally generations of disrespect and interpersonal powerlessness and it just. it gets to you a little
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luckyfiona · 1 year
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“ you can’t or you won’t? ”
                  ❝ ——  Oh. Hm. ❞
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                                          ( Uh-oh. )
Lawless Lucky talked a big game around the bonfire last night. She wasn't too oblivious to pick up on the fact that her being scandalized and upset by the boys' violent sides was beginning to grate on them. So, when all of the boys were talking about the gruesome things they'd like to do to the people who made their lives hard in The Other Place, she forced herself to laugh along, and even took the opening to spin a tale about how she was planning to poison her old employer's food. And, oh, those rotten pirates? Well, she would do the same to them if she had a chance.
So busy seizing on the moment, she didn't consider that she would actually have to put her money where her mouth was.
It would shatter the illusion of Neverland as her luxurious, peaceful, happily-ever-after paradise if she had to see any real carnage with her own two eyes, much less deal any of it herself. But here was dear Peter, ever the altruist, granter of all her wishes, suggesting she come along to their next raid of the Jolly Roger. Lucky's pretty sure he knows this is out of her comfort zone, if he's paid any attention to her — and he does, of course he does. Why else would he go through the trouble of bringing all of these troubled souls to the island if he didn't empathize and care about all of them, right? She can't imagine any motive but love and sympathy. — It's funny, considering how anxiously, meticulously sensitive she tries to be to his boundaries. There was something maybe endearingly boyish about his disregard for hers.
She reasons that she should be grateful for his investment in keeping things fresh and interesting. This is what a sensible, healthy relationship looked like, right? Balancing energies was a major tenet of Celtic magic— it was the key to harmony and prosperity. A passive, supportive person worked best with a person who was a little more... challenging. It would be too stagnant or too chaotic any other way. She gives a fond half-smile to her love, her true love, convinced he's only looking out for her best interests. She would find a way to explain to him that this doesn't really interest her... another time.
               ❝ Well, I suppose I would... ❞ 
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Lucky? Morally opposed to it? No sir, you've got the wrong lassie. You must be thinking of that prude from Chicago, Fiona Comisky, who used to dote and cry and sermonize Nate Larsen any time he got injured in a fight with some low-class brute he should've run away from. She had no qualms with clodhopping bullies who started barbaric fights. Didn't find it tasteless in the slightest.
She was opposed to tagging along for much more modest, supportive, team-playering reasons, to be certain. The same reasons why she declined Nate's offer to teach her how to use a bow and arrow: why would the Princess of Neverland get her dainty, dignified, not-at-all-labor-calloused hands dirty learning how to hunt when her boys got such a thrill out of slaying those innocent animals?
                ❝ But why bring a girl along to steal all of the attention?                        I'm not as strong or as sneaky as you. I may ruin the... Element of surprise. Or... distract everyone when they have to keep me out of harm's way. And there’s really— there's so much I could do back here. I thought I should make some sort of victory banquet for the boys to come back to. ......Besides... ❞
Lucky's fingers sidled over to his, tips brushing over his knuckles, as if timidly asking permission to show tenderness before making any sudden moves. Peter was a bit strange about physical touch. She could never tell if he was enjoying it, or if she maybe wasn't doing it right. When he didn't immediately swat her away, she gingerly placed her palms in his, intuitively careful not to scare him away like a baby deer too shy for human touch, or startle him like a scorpion ready to plunge a stinger into her at any moment. She has experience with his type. She has nothing if not patience and willpower to break through to them. She has hope that one day she'll be able to fully embrace him. If she's really as lucky as everybody says, maybe she'd be able to fully-fully "embrace" him.
                ❝ I love when you tell me all about your thrilling adventures. You get such this 𝓅𝓊𝒸𝓀𝒾𝓈𝒽 𝓉𝓌𝒾𝓃𝓀𝓁𝑒 in your eye... It's the same one you had when you first found me— the one that I saw and thought, 'Oh, there it is: my 𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫. At last, I can see it!' ❞ 
She boldly ventures to show a little more affection while she pleads, but not enough to push him too far, just enough to remind him that he can touch her back any time he's ready. (If he's rallying her to come out of her comfort zone, maybe this is a good time to encourage him to be a little more adventurous, too.) Her fingers, ever-so-lightly cupped over his hands, gently lace themselves into the spaces between his. She's not naïve enough to believe she's going to get out of raids forever. She just wants to experience feeling truly loved and close to him, just one time, before she has to see him at his absolute nastiest.
           ❝ Oh, Peter, won't you please let me see my 𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 again when you fill me in later? ❞ 
( Won't you please let her be so lucky as to skip out on this? )
╳ — 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 ! // ACCEPTING.
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