#sorry this isn’t my usual content but I couldn’t help myself

[firephoenix23]

Like I literally have second hand embarrassment for Vox after seeing what Alastor ACTUALLY is like in a rivalry.

Like homie wishes he could be that close to Alastor 😂😂

#can we get an F in the chat for my man Vox 😂 #I can imagine Vox like crying in his little incel tv room being why won’t Alastor say fuck you to me 🥺 #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #alastor #lucifer #hazbin vox #staticradio #radiostatic #sorry this isn’t my usual content but I couldn’t help myself #this show is wild

[superhaught]

To Be Another Notch in Your Bedpost

Pairing: Leighton Murray x Reader

Warnings: explicit smut! (18+ MDNI) implied sub/bratty Leighton, implied dom/brat tamer reader, one night stand

(This is my first ever published fic please be gentle! I want to start taking requests for anything Renee/Regina/Leighton so, ya know, tell me if ya like it and wanna see more writing from me)

Word Count: 2700, Part 1/?

Reader has a one night stand with the Leighton Murray.

Explicit Content Below

This party was everything you hated. Loud, unintelligible music. Drunken idiots everywhere. Sticky spills all over the floor and sweaty bodies brushing against you no matter how much you tried to stay out of the way. 

You wouldn’t have even come out tonight if it wasn’t for the fact that your friend basically dragged you kicking and screaming out of your dorm and away from your comfortable Netflix binging. You remained steadfast, though. She could bring you to the party but she couldn’t make you enjoy it. While she danced in the middle of it all, you continued to nurse your one cup of punch against the wall, allowing yourself the guilty pleasure of people watching.

It wasn’t that you thought you were better than your peers, you just couldn’t match their vibe. You couldn’t let go enough. You couldn’t become uninhibited. Your first year at Essex had been an overwhelming one. Making good friends had been hard. Staying on top of your classes even more so. And finding common ground with the legacy and/or wealthy students had been damn near impossible. Your student job in the library was draining, and your dating life had been nonexistent. This party felt like the absolute last thing you needed to decompress. 

You were just about to throw in the towel and say goodbye to your friend when someone unexpected approached you. 

“Hey wallflower,” she said, addressing you, “a few of the Theta guys are concerned that you’re bored or drugged. Either way, they want it to be resolved.”

The girl was Leighton Murray. A rising queen bee on campus. She was deeply connected to the school, extremely popular within multiple social groups on campus, and easily one of the most stunning women you have ever seen by far. 

You chuckle awkwardly and smile at the blonde, “Ah. Well, I am sorry for disturbing the vibe of the party. I know that the frats work hard to make these go well. But truly, I’m neither bored nor drugged, just… not fitting in.”

Leighton raises an eyebrow at you, “I take it this isn’t your usual scene, then?”

“Not at all,” you admit. “I’m much more comfortable in quiet settings with fewer people to worry about.”

Leighton nods and takes a sip from her own drink, glancing over the crowd thoughtfully. She turns back to you, “What made you come, then?”

You shrug, “I was forced by my friend. Apparently my preferred Friday night of watching Queer Eye and baking brownies for myself in the dorm kitchens depresses her.”

Leighton laughs, “It’s not necessarily a bad thing but definitely not how you should be spending your Friday nights in college…” she looks you up and down for a moment, clearly checking you out, “are you… ya know?” She makes her wrist go limp in that recognizable signal and you can’t help but chuckle. 

“What? Gay?” She looks a little embarrassed but you smile warmly and give her a reassuring nod, “Yes, I am. Very much so, don’t worry.”

She nods and takes another drink, and you mirror her. Word spreads quickly amongst the sapphic community at Essex and Leighton had been a big topic of conversation lately. The story was that she had recently come out and was making up for lost time. It wasn’t something that you judged her for, but now that she was here chatting you up, it did make you question the depth of her intentions. 

You tilt your head questioningly at her and decide to be bold, “We haven’t connected yet, have we?” 

Her cheeks flush and she hides her face with her cup again as she responds, “No… we have not…” 

“So were you truly sent by the frat guys to come check on me or did you… maybe volunteer yourself for the task?”

She feigns offense at your question and then shrugs, “I will neither confirm nor deny.” 

You flash her a knowing smirk and take another sip of your drink. You’re more than interested in her, but you’re also more than nervous. Casual hook-ups have never been your thing and Leighton was the type of woman that you’d want to spend more than just one exciting night with. But for all you knew, that’s not what she wanted right now. 

“Well…” she begins quietly, “since you aren’t enjoying yourself here, would it be okay for me to take you somewhere else?”

You slowly nod your head and meet her eyes, “Can I ask you a question first, Leighton?”

She nods back, “Yeah, what’s up?”

“What are you looking for, right now?”

She gives you a confused expression, “What do you mean?”

“Do you want one fun night and nothing more, or someone who might last longer than one fun night?”

She considers the question for a moment, “Is it important for you to know the answer to that before we go further?”

“It is,” you reply, “I just want to manage my expectations.”

She nods in understanding, “You’re the first person who’s actually asked that… honestly, I’m just looking to feel good. Lately, that has resulted in a string of fun nights… but I’m not opposed to having more than that, really.”

“So, you’re saying that if you hit it off with someone and they asked you out, you wouldn’t outright reject them?”

She nods, “Right. Does that… help you with your concerns?”

“Yeah, it does. Thank you.” You smile again and she smiles back, seemingly moved by your tender nature. You hold out your hand to her and finally introduce yourself and she echoes your name back to you as she happily shakes your hand. 

“So… about my offer?”

You giggle and nod, “Get me out of here, Leighton.”

The girl grabs your hand and quickly leads you out of the frat party. You’re able to quickly shoot your friend an explanatory text so that she won’t worry about your whereabouts, and soon enough, you're trailing behind Leighton Murray as she takes you across campus back to her dorm. 

You hold onto her hand the entire time. She swiftly unlocks the door to her suite, which is thankfully empty at the moment, and she pulls you straight into her room, shutting the door behind you. 

You lock eyes and smile, a little nervously on both of your parts. It was comforting to you that there was some anxiety for her as well. But you’ve never been one to let that anxiousness prevent you from taking the lead. You bring your hands up to her cheeks and cradle her softly as you pull her in towards you and close the distance between your lips. Her eyes flutter shut and a small sigh escapes her as you kiss. The softness of her, the lipgloss she wears, the perfume on her neck… all of it completely tantalizes you and you suddenly have no trouble falling into her completely. 

Her hands drift to the small of your back, then she squeezes your ass playfully and yanks you a little closer to her, which prompts you to gently push her backwards so that she’s against the door. Leighton gasps lightly and you smile in the kiss, knowing that your actions have pleased her. Your parted lips give her the opportunity to graze her tongue over your bottom lip and you eagerly accept it and meet her with yours, deepening the kiss. 

You begin to trail your hands down her body, letting your fingertips brush skin where it’s exposed and fidgeting with the fabric of her dress as you go down to her hips and hold onto her firmly. Your touch sends a shiver up her spine and she moans. You pause the kiss for just a moment so that you can take a much needed deep breath, but you keep your nose and forehead pressed against her and meet her gorgeous blue eyes again for a second and you can’t help but be in awe, “fuck…” you breathe.

She nods eagerly and pulls you back in for more. You push her back against the door again, keeping her pinned in place as you gently shift her hair out of the way of her neck and you lean down to place kisses on her skin beneath her jawline and along her pulse point. 

She sighs and melts, biting her lower lip and burying her fingers into the hair at the back of your neck to hold onto you. Your lips and tongue explore her soft, sensitive skin and you playfully nibble at her earlobe which makes her gasp before you return to her lips and continue making out with her. 

You feel her start to rock her hips, trying to grind against you in search of friction where she needs it. You smile and tease her, slowing down your movements and taking your time to worship the other side of her neck and each collarbone. 

She groans, “oh fuck… you… tease...”

You smirk and whisper into her ear, “Feeling needy, Leight? If you want something, you’d better ask for it.”

She whines and bites into her lower lip hard but then indignantly shakes her head, deciding to try to maintain a little bit of brattiness rather than just caving right away. 

Your hands drop down to her thighs and start to toy with the bottom hem of her dress, inching the fabric upwards bit by bit and making her squirm while you kiss her collarbones and as much of her chest as is exposed by the low cut. 

Your fingertips dance over her skin and give her goosebumps as you touch the backs of her thighs feather-light, keeping your pelvis just out of her reach so that when she rocks her hips, she doesn’t find anything to make contact with. You find a great deal of amusement in watching this powerful woman quickly crumble. She pulls your hair harder and gets even more vocal with her whines and groans, cursing in your ear and desperately seeking more deliberate touch from you. 

You keep kissing her neck, touching your lips and tongue softly to her hairline and feeling her pounding heartbeat. You barely hear it, a faint whisper escapes her, “please…” 

You raise an eyebrow and pull back to look at her face, “Hm? What was that?”

Leighton grumbles and whispers it again, “please… please.”

“Please, what?”

“Oh my god please fucking fuck me!” She finally blurts. 

You smile, satisfied, and decide to oblige her instead of gloating any further. You kiss her lips once more before lowering yourself onto your knees between her legs, her mouth falls open and she stares down at you in awe.

You look up at her and maintain eye contact as you hike up the fabric of her dress even more, until it bunches around her hips and exposes her lace panties and an intoxicating inch of skin between her navel and the underwear. You reach your head up and press a soft, cruel kiss to her center over the fabric which makes her jut her hips and groan, falling back against the door a little bit. You can feel how hot and wet she already is and you try not to let that go to your head. 

You slide your hands down the skin of her legs and follow your fingers with your lips, kissing her gently, until your hands reach her heels and you start to take them off of her one at a time while watching her face. 

“You’re so gorgeous, Leighton.” You tell her. 

She just flushes and nods, helping you by kicking her shoes off and out of the way. Your hands return to her thighs and then slowly, you hook your fingers into the waistband of her panties and you start to pull them down. She moans and you feel an overwhelming wave of heat race through your own body and settle between your legs. You watch her eyes as you pull the fabric down and she carefully steps out of it, then you take a moment to admire her like this and you feel like all of this must be a dream. 

“Are you ready, Leighton?” 

She nods emphatically, “God yes… please…”

You nod and help her drape one of her legs over our shoulder as you get yourself into a solid position and bring your face between her thighs.

She leans back, putting more of her weight against the door and with one more affirmative nod, you extend your tongue and drag it along her. 

You hear her moan and can sense her letting her head fall back against the door as she winds her fingers into your hair and holds your head firmly in place so that you are less inclined to pull away. 

Your senses are flooded by the taste and feel of her and your own eyes roll back before you shut them completely and draw your focus into pleasing this incredible woman. Your lips and tongue start to work on her slowly, you moan against her and she grinds against you and you can tell that she’s already anxious for release. 

You drag your tongue languidly through her folds and pause to push it inside of her before returning to her clit and circling the sensitive bundle of nerves with the flat of your tongue. You can easily tell what she likes and wants more of and it doesn’t take long at all to build her up to climax. Your lower face is already drenched in her but you stay in place and maintain the pace and motions that she’s responding to, feeling all of her muscles tense, her breathing quicken and her noises intensify. With just a few more movements of your tongue she finally releases with a long, drawn out moan and you start to slow your ministrations as she rides out her orgasm on your face. She beams widely and laughs joyously through the waves of ecstasy, breathing hard, chest heaving. 

You do your best to clean her up and then you quickly stand and help support her as her legs weaken. With a simple lift, you bring her from the door to her bed and lie her down and she curls up with a big smile on her face and says, “holy shit…” 

You laugh and crawl into the bed next to her and wrap your arms around her while she rests for a moment, catching her breath and regaining her bearings. You spend a few quiet minutes just spooning her and rubbing her back gently and she smiles and hums happily. 

Eventually, she whispers, “You know, I’ve slept with a lot of people recently… but what you just did for me… doesn’t even compare. I feel like you’re on a whole different graph…”

You laugh, “What? That can’t be true.”

“No, I'm being one hundred percent serious. That was insane.”

You smile and get close to her ear and whisper to her, “It doesn’t have to be over…”

“Well right, I need to return the favor…” She starts to roll over toward you but you hold her in place and stop her, leaning over her shoulder and kissing her neck lightly, “sure, you could do that, but I’m talking about it not being over for you…” you whisper against her ear.

“Fuck…” she groans, “are you going for some kind of record?”

“I just want to make you feel good…”

“You’re unreal…”

You flash her a playful smirk and she gets up out of the bed and slips a sock over the door handle to her room, “Bela will understand.”

You both giggle and then she excitedly gets back into the bed with you, climbing onto your lap and immediately capturing your lips in more passionate kisses. 

The night skips on, continuing to excite and pleasure you both, and you remind yourself no short of a hundred times to thank your friend for making you come to the party.

Next Chapter

#leighton murray #tslocg #sex lives of college girls #leighton murray fanfiction #leighton murray smut #smut with plot #renee rapp #renee rapp fanfiction #original writing

[hamiltonaf]

Hi! I’m so excited you’ve open your requests, can I ask one with Lewis where you work with Toto and are like his little girl, so you get along and are close.

You’ve been secretly in love with him for a while so you try to help and been there for him now that Merc is struggling with the car, so after one race weekend like this one (😪) you try to confort him but he takes his anger on you.

The following week at the factory you’re distant and he starts to miss you…

The end is on you.

Thanks 🙌🏾❤️

Confession | Lewis Hamilton

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.6K

Warnings: Slight angst but fluff

A/N: Hi loves ! Slowly recovering from being ill for over a week so bare with me. Thanks anon for requesting. Hope you babes enjoy. Requests are still open .xx

The Monza race weekend was here… is it hypocritical of me to say it’s one of my favourites if I’m working for Mercedes ? You can’t deny that the vibe and energy of tifosi doesn’t hype you up even if you’re not a fan of Ferrari.

I couldn’t wait to start posting content for the weekend, I mean it is my job anyway - social media admin. It’s a fun job, not gonna lie. I think it’s quite evident that I spend most of my time posting about Lewis’s paddock outfits than anything Mercedes related. For starters, it’s valid to post Lewis because he’s obviously part of the team and secondly, who isn’t waiting to see the Sir Lewis Hamilton fashion week every race weekend ? Am I right..

I think trying to hide my crush or love should I say for Lewis isn’t working considering that some fans have even commented that it’s ‘quite obvious that admin has a soft spot for Lew’. I’m really exposing myself on main. As extroverted as I am, I can’t help but get shy and quite around Lewis, still bold enough to compliment his outfits everyday on race weekends - if I don’t comment, it’s obvious that something is wrong.

I’d like to think that Lewis and I are somewhat best friends considering we spend more time off-track than on-track. However, I’m starting to re-think that seeing how he’s keeping his distance from me. I eventually just had to work up a nerve to just march over to him and ask him what’s wrong. He finished his interviews and he came back into the hospitality. I approached him with a soft smile, “Hey, are you okay ?” I asked softly. “I’m fine” he abruptly said and brushed my shoulder with his as he walked past. I followed behind him and waited till we were in the hallway to speak up again. “I know something is on your mind. You know you can talk to me Lew, I’m always here for you” I said softly.

“(Y/N) I really couldn’t care to talk to you right now ! Can you just leave me alone ?” He said harshly. Thank god no one was around because I probably would’ve died of embarrassment. My smile fell and I felt a pain in my chest. “Sorry” I said lowly and walked away in the opposite direction.

I avoided him for the rest of the day as he asked. This was the first time he ever raised his voice at me and I was quite hurt to say the least. Usually post-race we’d meet up and go out for dinner or just spend the evening talking in either one of our rooms. I didn’t bother waiting for him after I stuck around for the team briefing, I went straight to the hotel and I was ready to go back to England. So much for thinking we could celebrate him racing for 2 more years.

Luckily I didn’t have to change my flight since I was already scheduled to leave for my flight back home at 8PM. Once I was back home and to myself, I noticed Lewis had posted on his Instagram. Low-key saddened to not receive a message from him yet. I guess it’s a sign I need to get out of my deluded space and get over him.

At a time like this not gonna lie that I hated my job because so much for trying to get over Lewis, posting about him on the teams social media is part of the job.

It’s Wednesday and we have a team meeting at the factory. I really wish I could sit this one out but unfortunately I can’t. I smiled at all the familiar faces as I clocked in and was so relieved to see Toto. “Ahh (Y/N) ! I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages, you’ve been distant lately” he said as he pulled me in for a hug. “Toto, it’s only been 3 days since the race” I reminded him. “I know, but usually you’re always around after the team briefing on Sundays and even on off days, I hear from you. Everything okay ?” He asked concerned as he had an arm around my shoulder and lead the way.

“Oh yeah everything’s fine, the travelling and the energy from Monza just drained me this weekend. I just needed to de-stress these past few days” I sighed. “Of course, I suggest maybe taking an early holiday to Singapore” he suggested. “Sounds good to me, why don’t you and Susie join me ?” “I’ll let her know and get back to you on that” he smiled as he pats my back. Almost as if on cue, Lewis approached us. “You finally made it” Toto joked. “Sorry I’m late, uncle duties” he shrugged.

I felt so uncomfortable, I wish I could’ve been swallowed up into a hole. “No worries, (Y/N) kept me company” he smiled at me. I glanced up at Toto before stealing a glance at Lewis who was already looking at me with a soft smile.

“Oh, would you look at that, George is here ! Let me just go greet him” I excused myself and walked over to George. “Hey you !” I cheerfully said. “(Y/N/N) ! So good to see you. Carmen and I missed you on Sunday” he said as he then pulled me in for a hug. “Aww sorry I had to take off suddenly, had some things to sort at home” I sighed. “Ahh well we always have the next race weekend” he suggested. “Yeah of course. How’s my bestie doing..where is she ?” I asked. I could literally feel a pair of eyes burning at the back of my head. “She’s at home. You should stop by later if you have time” he smiled. “Aww that’s sweet. Thanks for the offer, I’ll try” I smiled back and just then we were disrupted to gather everyone for the factory meeting.

I don’t know why my brain told me to look back…and I actually did. Of course, it’s Lewis looking right at me. I ignored him and walked past him with George by my side.

After the factory meeting, both George and Lewis practiced ahead of Singapore on the simulator. Our team photographer, Steve, had then sent me the pictures he took for today for me to post onto the team socials. I was in my own cubicle, organising posts and captions until I heard a “hey !” from behind me. “Heyy !” I enthusiastically replied. I turned around on my chair to be faced with Lewis.

“Oh. It’s you” I said as my smile dropped. “Ahh you’re never this disappointed to see me and you’re so distant lately” he said causally. “Are you forgetting what you told me on Sunday ? You said and I quote I couldn’t care to talk to you right now, leave me alone !” I whisper yelled. “Can we talk somewhere more private ?” He motioned to the room a few metres away. I rolled my eyes and followed behind him. “Look (Y/N/N)..I’m really sorry for the way I acted. It was immature and uncalled for. I should’ve never taken my anger out on you... It’s unfortunate that I hurt those that I love and care for, you deserve better” he said as he took a step closer and held my hands in his.

I sighed, “Lew, it’s okay.. I get it. It’s normal to get upset, no one is expected to be happy all the time. You had a bad race, and it is what it is…you’re forgiven” “Those words just made my day. I didn’t know how to message you because I felt bad, and I needed to see you in person to get everything off my chest” he cleared his throat and had a more serious expression. “You made me realise a lot in these few days we were apart… I’m in denial about my feelings” he huffed. “Okay ? Lew I’m not getting you” I raised a brow in confusion. “Life isn’t complete without you in it. Not hearing your laugh or seeing you and that beautiful smile that lights up the room made me realise what I’m missing… I’m falling in love with you (Y/N)” he softly said with a smile.

My heart was racing. I could feel my hands getting clammy. I was at a loss for words. “Please say something” he softly said. “I’m sorry I’m just speechless. This is so surreal. I’ll be honest with you, I’ve been in denial about my feelings for a while, I tried to convince myself that the less I see you then the better… but I couldn’t. You made it so hard for me when you look so fine, and I have to post pictures of you -“ I rambled. “Did you just call me fine ?” He smirked and raised a brow. “Did I ? Oh my god. I- ugh you’re making this hard” I pouted as I noticed his eyes went from making eye contact to subtly switching to my lips.

I didn’t even have time to realise what was going on until I felt the butterflies. He cupped my cheek and placed his lips on mine. I kissed back and placed a hand around his neck to pull closer. “Lewis, have you seen-“ the door burst opened by George. I broke away and felt embarrassed by getting caught in the act. “Found her. Uhm sorry to interrupt, was going to ask if you’re coming over (Y/N/N) but seems like you already have plans” George winked. “Righttt see yourself out mate” Lewis motioned to the door. “Lew !” I playfully hit his chest. “See you love birds around” George said lastly before leaving. Momentarily, Lewis and I turned to look at each other. “So, your place or mine ?” He smirked

#f1 #formula one #formula 1 #f1 fic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #lewis hamilton #sir lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you #lewis hamilton fluff #f1 fluff #lewis hamilton oneshot #lh #lh44 #ricciardoaf oneshots

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Blind Offer 1

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon, manipulation, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: After a leak causes you to evacuate your apartment, your landlord offers a vacant unit that's too good to be true. (short!plus!reader)

Character: Steve Rogers, additional characters to come

Note: Loooooook. I was gonna restrain myself but this all just got outta hand. This is one of my Corrupt-A-Wish requests but I won't reveal which one right away because it'll be part of the plot!

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you like I love turning intended one shots into series. Take care. 💖

You keep your slippers just away from the edge of the puddle. The sheet of water extends almost completely across the kitchen. You hug yourself, still slightly groggy from your early and rude awakening. The washing you put in last night hadn’t finished and instead the sudsy mess had leaked out around the door.

There’s a sigh and a clank as your landlord pulls his arm out of the machine. Your sopping laundry is in a bucket by his feet. His shirt is visibly wet from his struggle to stem the steady flow dripping from the brim of the washer door. You worry you may have overloaded the compact stacking unit.

“I’m sorry, Steve,” you say as you sway guiltily.

“Don’t be,” he puts his hands on his hips and blows out. A golden strand dangles down his forehead, “it’s not you. My own fault. I thought these things might hold out for a while…”

“Oh?”

“Not the first time I’ve had to fight the beast but it worked. I should be sorry, I should’ve just replaced it.”

“Well, uh, what are you gonna do now?” You look at the wet tile, the scent of laundry detergent thick in the air as the water creeps closer to your slippers.

“Uh, yeah, well, obviously you can’t stay here.”

“I can’t?” You raise your head, running your hand up the front of your robe and clutching the fluffy fabric.

“No, bylaws say you need to evacuate until I can get a new unit in here. And clean up. Leak like this can leave mildew and mold,” he combs his large hand over his head, “I feel bad enough, I couldn’t let you live in this.”

“Okay… um, I have to work in a couple hours–”

“Oh, geez. Well, er, maybe just pack up a few things and I can take you over to the new place? You can always come back to grab more if you need.”

“I guess…” you chew your lip. His blue eyes fixate on the gesture so you stop. “How far is it?”

“Not very, about twenty minutes east by car.”

“East?” You utter dully, “that’s a bit far. I work up near the metro area.”

“There’s some bus stops that way but I could give you a lift tod–” There’s a sudden gush and he looks back to the machine, a bubble of water flowing up over the brim. He shuts the door, stemming much of it. “You won’t even be able to cook in here,” he says, “look, bylaws say I have to relocate you. I have a property free which means I don’t have to splurge for a hotel. If you prefer somewhere closer, then it’s on you.”

You frown. He’s not the worst landlord you’ve had but he definitely talks like one. He’s only really worried about his liability. Yet, most others wouldn’t have even brought up that clause and left you to wallow in this puddle of dirty laundry water. You shrug, hopefully the other place isn’t too bad.

“Right, uh, I guess I’ll go get dressed,” you relent.

“Great,” he says with blatant exasperation, turning back to face the trembling washer, his voice deflating to a hoarse rasp, “goddamn.”

You hesitate as you stare at his back. The gray fabric of his jersey henley strains across his shoulder blades as the back of his forearms clench, veins pulsing out. He rolls his head on his neck and heaves out again. 

You turn on your foot and slowly pad out of the kitchen. You hear his sole squeak subtly but refuse to glance back again. You can’t help but feel that it’s all your fault. You’re sure he’s too nice to say so. Or too distracted by the chaos you’ve caused.

🖤

The new apartment isn’t an apartment at all. It’s a walkup townhouse with a sleek black and white exterior. The neighbourhood is far out of your range but you won’t complain. You suspect Steve is already aware of the deferential.

“Wow, this place is really nice,” you say as he holds the door for you. You step inside and take in the space; a narrow staircase to the next floor, black frames around grayscale photography, and minimalist decor in the form of a standing geometric floor vase and a coat rack with bent arms. 

You stop to take your shoes off on the mat as Steve squeezes in behind you and shuts the door. You trip away from him, surprised by the friction of his body against yours. You’ve always been overly aware of yourself and how much room you take up. Your size makes it hard to not feel crowded, still the close brush rattles you.

He swirls the keys around a finger and stills them in his fist. He looks around emphatically and waves a hand.

“Well, this is it. It’s my only vacant property at the moment, so, it’ll have to do. Fully furnished, at least.”

“It’s great,” you assure him as you step further in, your duffel hanging heavy from one arm, “wow, it’s…”

“A lot bigger than your place. Yeah. New development. Invested at ground floor. You’ll be the first tenant, at least for the time being.”

“Ah, right,” you go to the narrow bench of black acrylic and place your bag atop it. “I’ll try not to mess it up.”

“Didn’t mean it like that.”

“Uh, yeah, but obviously it’s above my paygrade,” you scoff, “I appreciate it and sorry again.”

“Don’t worry about it. Really. Dropping a couple hundred on a new washer woulda saved us both trouble. I only got one person to blame,” he holds out his hand, “you don’t need a tour, do ya?” He offers the keys and you step up to take them, “I’ll be back around noon to get you to work but I got running around to do.”

“Um, I should be able to figure it out–”

“Oh, wait,” he puts a finger up, “the door code. Just in case. Also, you’ll wanna override the security system when you get in.” He turns and points to the sleek black box mounted beside the door, “I got it on my phone but you’ll just need to pop it open and put in the number.” He slides out his phone, “I’ll just text it before I forget.”

“Right,” you nod as you clutch the keys tight, “got it. I think I can manage.”

“Anyway, you got my number, you need anything, you know how to reach me,” he checks his watch, “noon,” he repeats as he points at you, “I’ll be back.”

He spins and opens the door, swiftly stepping through before swinging it shut behind him. You’re left slightly stunned and don’t move right away. You cross the floor and twist the latch of the door, a cautious habit likely unnecessary in this neighbourhood.

You turn back to your new abode and let your eyes rove. Wow. All this just for you. You wonder how much one of these places go for. Your monthly pay probably wouldn’t even cover a single week.

You shuffle forward, uncertain, expecting for Steve to come back through and tell you it’s all a mistake. 

You peer around at the immaculate decor. Each piece is perfectly set and carefully curated. The long leather sectional and the matching square backed armchairs before the artificial fireplace in the wall. A low coffee table on a rug patterned in black and white, a touch of red in the throw pillows and the curtains.

Then the kitchen, white, pure marble, and pale silver appliances. The tile is marked by subtle dove grey diamonds, and a table sits against the wall with two chairs. You go back into the hallway and down towards the front of the stairs. You peek up at the top as you pass the small half-bath embedded on the other side.

Upstairs, you find two bedrooms, a full bath, and what appears to be a study, along with several spacious closets. It’s truly a dream. Who knew a broken washer could get you a stay in heaven.

Well, you should get settled in. Enjoy it while it lasts.

🖤

As promised, Steve shows up just before noon. You have your uniform on but feel less than ready to go. The abrupt awakening, the displacement, and the typical dread of the overcrowded box store. Your job is less than glamorous and the townhouse underlines that even more as you bid it a reluctant goodbye.

Steve’s car is sleek and red and overpriced. You don’t know much about cars but you can just tell. The interior is squeaky and so clean you’re sure it must be right off the lot. That new car smell fills your nose and threatens to inspire a migraine.

You put your purse in your lap and buckle up as he turns down the volume on the stereo. You recognise the song, surprised by his taste. He didn’t seem the angsty type. As far from grungy as you can imagine.

“Smashing Pumpkins?” You comment.

“You don’t like them?”

“Don’t mind em,” you shrug, “just figured you were more into… I don’t know, just not them.”

“When I’m not unclogging toilets or changing smoke alarms, I actually do have fun,” he scoffs.

“Oh, I didn’t mean–”

“Kidding,” he assures you as he pulls away from the curb.

You watch the townhouses pass by as he slowly rolls down the street. It’s eerie. There are no other cars lined up in the spots parallel to the pavement. In fact, you don’t see anyone else around. Not through windows, not coming or going, no one so much as walking down the cul-de-sac. It is oddly isolated from the suburbs all around.

“Not like I have great music taste, I’m a disco junkie,” you try to laugh off the tension.

“Fun,” he muses dully.

You don’t respond. You’re on your phone checking Uber prices for the way back. Eek. You pull up the bus routes for the area; at least two transfers to get there. Shit.

“So…” Steve begins, “who you chatting with? Telling them about your tight-ass landlord or what?”

“Uh, no,” you put your phone down and black the screen, “I was just… tryna figure out how I’m getting home. Sorry. Did you say something?”

“Nothing important,” he assures, “what time are you done?”

“Nine, closing,” you explain, “it’s fine, there’s buses. I’ll just have to remember not to go to my usual stop.”

“I can come get you,” he offers.

“That’s… that’s fine. You don’t have to. You’ve already done enough–”

“Really, I don’t have much else going on. Besides the washer but my buddy’s taking care of that for me. I’ll be available.”

“If you don’t mind, but really, I’m gonna have to learn the route. Actually, when do you think I’ll be back at my apartment?”

“Couple of days at best. After we left, the water got into the motor of the dryer– to spare you the whole spiel, the dryer needs to be replaced too. And the floor might need to come up, water’s done a number on the laminate–”

“Oh,” you grimace, “I… that sounds bad.”

“Nothing that can’t be fixed. Look, I know it’s probably not ideal for you to be all the way out here. I’ll keep you updated,” he speaks with one hand as his other remains on the wheel.

“Oh, no, I appreciate all your help. It’s just…” you cross your ankles and nervously wiggle your foot, “I’m just anxious.”

He hums and a thoughtful silence rises between you. He turns a corner and clears his throat, “about the apartment or work?”

“What?”

“What are you anxious about?” He asks.

“Oh, uh, yeah, uh, work, sure. Work always makes me anxious. Lots of angry customers and we’re headed into that season, you know?”

“Makes sense,” he nods, moving his hand low on the wheel as he sits back and steers lazily with the clogged flow of the city traffic.

“And the apartment,” you admit, “I’m not the best with change.”

“Yeah, I get that,” he agrees, “I’m a bit of stickler. I like order, you know? Everything has its place. Everyone has their role.”

You mull his words. It’s a strange way of putting it but you get it. You find your life erratic this time of year, when your schedule goes from predictable to hectic and fluid. Everyone wants to switch shifts and all the managers are trying to fill the schedule with as few bodies as possible.

“I mean…” he breaks the lull, “you know, I keep a pretty strict schedule with myself. Try to. You never know when you’ll get a call at 5am.”

You suck in air and look at him from the corner of your eye. His allusion isn’t subtle. The pit sinks further in your stomach. You don’t need one more person disappointed in you, not when you’re about to face Gwen the manager and her omnipotent clipboard.

“Yeah, uh,” you bend your arm and rub your neck, “sorry…”

“You apologise a lot,” he interrupts, “I’m not mad.”

“I know, I just feel bad,” you move your thumb to chew it.

He glances over at you before quickly refocusing on the road. He laughs, a hollow, gristly chuckle, “trust me, if I was mad, you would know.”

You blink. What? You’re not sure what he means. Is he joking? Maybe it’s that he’s such a nice guy that the change would be unmistakable or maybe he’s being sarcastic and you’re too stupid to pick up on it. Either way, you just want this car ride to be over.

“Right,” you eke out, “I’ll, erm, be sure to stay on your good side then.”

He slides his hand around the wheel to the top, squeezing until the leather squeaks. He shifts in his seat and exhales, “girl like you, I can’t imagine you being too much of a handful.”

His remark sticks in your ears. Again, you’re confounded by him. You can't read his tone as it's quickly washed away by the sudden blare of music as he cranks up the volume.

“This is a good one,” he calls over the music, “I’m sure you know it.”

Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage Someone will say, "What is lost can never be saved" Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage

Now I'm naked Nothing but an animal But can you fake it For just one more show?

The creaky tones of Billy Corgan’s lilt surrounds you as Steve bobs his head. The swirl of noise and the shadow of tension mingle and suffocate you. You’re starting to look forward to work.

#steve rogers #dark steve rogers #dark!steve rogers #fic #dark fic #dark!fic #corrupt-a-wish #au #multifandom #captain america #avengers #marvel #mcu #more characters to be added #blind offer

[itsjusthockey]

When The Party’s Over - Jack Hughes

I have a problem with writing angst and this is much longer than expected. I'm not sorry.

Big announcement coming soon. Get excited.

I'm needy, so the more love I receive, the more I write. So please follow, comment, repost, and talk to me. I really do cherish this blog and want to be more active

Anyway so yeah, come talk to me. Please, I want to know what you guys think.

Should there be a part two? I don't know

wc: 3,423 (credit to gif maker)(don’t steal my work)

Content warning: Swearing and light NSFW? I don’t know it’s not super explicit but it’s all my first time writing it and I’m not sure

Part 2

Don't you know I'm no good for you?

I've learned to lose you, can't afford to

Jack may not be much of a coffee guy, but he is nothing but a weak man when it comes to his favorite bagel place. It’s a regular part of his routine, a constant thing. He goes before practice, grabs his usual order, and then he’s gone.

Usually, he keeps his head down, Jersey isn’t the biggest place, and he likes to avoid attention on his mornings off. Yet, he lifts his head when his name is called and moves to thank the lady handing him his food and walk out when he quickly scans the room, his eyes stopping when he lands on a familiar face.

You’re sitting at a small table close to the edge of the room, surrounded by notebooks, highlighters, and staring hard at your computer. He takes a mental note of your concentrated state, knowing you’re probably in the zone, but he elects to ignore that fact as he makes his way toward your table.

You jump slightly when he takes a seat across from you, only to relax, just barely, when you see it’s him.

“Jesus, Jack,” You breathe out, “Scared the hell out of me.”

Jack can’t help but let a smirk take over his features, and his heart twinges a bit when you let a breathtaking smile take over your own face.

“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.” He teases. “What’re you doing here?”

You look at him briefly, then gesture vaguely to your coffee and your wide range of studying supplies. “Homework, or at least trying to.”

“Ah, I see.” He smiles again, relishing in the company of your presence; it’s been over a week since he last saw you.

“Anyway,” you scoot your chair closer to the table, “Come here often? Their bagels are great.”

Jack lets out a small laugh. “Yeah, almost every morning. It’s pretty close to my place and the rink.”

Once he finishes, a look of recognition crosses your features. “I knew this area seemed decently familiar.”

Jack nods, and he watches as you scan over the coffee shop, then finally rest your eyes back on him. The eye contact doesn’t last long, though, when your phone begins to buzz on the table, and you sneak a quick glance down. Jack can’t help but notice the slight smile after you read the message, and his heart falls ever so slightly.

You snap your eyes to meet his and place your phone face down on the table, leaning back in your chair. “Not that I don’t love this reunion in the daylight, but don’t you have somewhere to be?”

The question is fair, he does, in fact, have someplace to be, but if he’s honest with himself, the last thing he wants to do is remove himself from this chair across from you.

“Yeah, but being a little late never hurt anyone.”

You snort at his statement, rolling your eyes at him.

“Go to practice, Jack.”

He knows you’re right, he doesn’t want to leave, but with playoffs around the corner, he shouldn’t be here, no matter how much he wants to stay.

“You’re right,” As he gets up, he notices your almost empty coffee cup. “Can I at least get you a refill before I leave?”

You glance at your coffee, contemplate his offer, and shake your head. “I’m okay, Jack. Thanks anyway.”

He nods, grabs his bagel, and turns to leave, but not before he pauses and turns around again. “You busy tonight?”

Your eyes dart back up again, but before you answer, your phone buzzes again, and you glance down. You take a few seconds to read the message before you answer him.

“I’m not sure. I’ll let you know.”

You give him a warm smile, but there is also a hint of awkwardness behind it. He chooses to ignore the possibility of rejection and nods your way one last time, and makes his way out of the shop.

As he exits, he glances back to your table one last time, already seeing you consumed back into your schoolwork, forgetting he was ever there.

Jack knows he’s not the smartest guy in the world, but he’s smart enough to know when he’s fucked. The idea was not to fall in love, which is easier said than done. He couldn’t help it; it came out of nowhere. You’ve been sleeping together for a while, longer than both of you could care to admit. He knows that the arrangement is simple, and it works. You’re not his, he’s not yours.

But fuck, does he want you to be.

Tore my shirt to stop you bleedin’

But nothin' ever stops you leavin'

Jack gently traces his fingers along your skin, relishing in the feel of your curves beneath his touch. He watches in awe of how your body responds to every move he makes, and he can tell you’re close. Your fingers dig hard into his back, your head falls back ever so slightly, and he slows down his movements to the pace he knows drives you crazy.

To get you there, he concentrates. He knows your body like the back of his hand, but he still tries to watch your face for cues, even though you're not meeting his stare. He didn’t notice it right away when you started sleeping together, but now it’s hard to ignore. No matter what he’s doing, you always look away.

He desperately wants to see you, stare deep into your eyes, and show you, somehow, that when you’re beneath him, it's the closest thing to heaven on earth.

Tonight is different for him, and he needs you to look at him, to see him.

He pulls your face gently to look at him, and reaches down to capture your lips in a heated kiss. He makes sure he’s got your attention. Your pupils are blown with bliss, and the soft look goes give him makes him feel like he’s the only person in the world. Before he can stop himself, he presses his forehead to yours and lets himself fall deep into the endless pools of your eyes.

It’s intimate, you both know that, but for a moment, just that moment, you allow yourself to get lost in each other as you meet your highs.

Jack rides it out as long as possible, loving you in every way he knows how and making sure you feel just as good as him. When you both finally come down, your heavy mixed breathing filling the room, reality sinks in.

You’re the first to break, as always, gently pushing him off you. Jack watches silently as you get off the bed, grabbing various scattered clothing items and pulling them on. He watches with a mixture of longing and disdain. He knows you’re going to leave, you always do, but he can’t help but hope this time you’ll stay.

“Stop being a creep.” A playful grin plays on your face as you catch him staring, finishing pulling on your shirt.

He ignores your joke, “Where are you going?”

You shrug your shoulders way too casually.

“Not sure, maybe out?”

His heart sinks, and he doesn’t want to acknowledge the fact that you’re killing him.

“You could stay? It’s pretty late.” He glances at the clock next to his bed.

The dry laugh you bark out makes him cringe.

“And risk running into the next girl? I’m okay, Jack; I’ll see you later.”

With that and a quick check of yourself, you leave. He’s left with his lingering thoughts and regrets. He knows you’re bad for each other, and he knows that this arrangement will eventually kill him, but he can’t seem to get away.

Jack hears the outside door slam, and he’s truly alone. He decides that his best option is to sleep you off, try to forget the way you felt in his arms and the way you make his heart feel like it’s about to burst. He falls back into his bed, staring at the ceiling. The sheets around him smell like the familiar scent of you, and he hates how it’s comforting. He feels himself falling deeper and deeper into himself, and you didn’t even know he was drowning.

He knows it’s best if he just tries to sleep, flush out any thoughts of you. He doesn’t need to think about where you are or who you’re with because you aren’t his, even though he’d do anything to make you love him as much as he loves you.

He thinks about the last comment you made. About another girl. He knows his reputation and the fact that many people think he’s a player. He’s not, though, and he wishes you knew there wasn’t another girl; it’s only you.

Don't you know too much already?

I'll only hurt you if you let me

Jack's eyes are fixed hard on your back, watching almost every move you make across the dimly lit bar. He can tell you’re relaxed, and your head is thrown back, laughing along with your friends. Though he isn’t close enough to hear the laugh that makes him happy and destroys him, his heart clenches anyway. You look like you’re having the best time in the world, and he can’t help but wonder if he’s crossed your mind, even once.

He is nursing a drink that is too watered down for his taste, and his focus is pulled back to you every time he manages to integrate himself back into his teammate's conversation. While he catches a few snippets here and there, he has no idea what the hell they’ve been talking about for the last twenty minutes, and he hopes they don’t notice that his attention has been elsewhere.

He isn’t that lucky, though, because Nico elbows him slightly in the ribs, leaning toward him.

“You okay, Jacky?”

He nods, feeling horrible. “Yeah, sorry.”

He knows he needs to focus, pay attention to the guys, and have a few drinks after a good week. So he tries, his absolute hardest, to keep his eyes off of you.

He lasts about five seconds, and when he looks back toward your table, you’re gone.

He quickly searches the room and sees you making your way toward the bar. It’s honestly embarrassing how fast he moves, and before he can stop himself, he removes himself from his table and makes a beeline toward you.

He reaches you just as you put in your order, throwing the bartender a thousand-watt smile and leaning ever so slightly over the counter. When you finally notice someone beside you and turn to face him, It’s the brief look of unrecognition that practically kills him.

“Jack?” You recover quickly, slipping on a bright smile. “What’re you doing here?”

He stares hard for a second, unsure if you’re messing with him. He knows he’s told you this is his team's favorite bar, but when you’re still waiting for his answer, he clears his throat.

“Uh, it’s the bar closest to the rink,” He hates the sound of his voice. “I’m here with the guys.”

Your eyes flash behind him to his teammates, and a sly smirk takes over your features.

“Well, don’t they look like fun?”

He lets out a light laugh, “They are.”

The bartender interrupts the conversation, setting down your various drinks. You go to hand him your card, but Jack beats you to it.

“It’s on me.” He hands over his Amex before you can protest, and you shoot him a look he can’t decipher.

“You don’t have to buy my drinks, Jack.”

He shrugs his shoulders as if it’s nothing.

You thank him and the bartender as you pick up the drinks.

“Need help?” Jack asks, watching you struggle to get the last glass.

You finally grasp the cup and flash him another smile. “I got it. Thanks again, Jack.”

As quickly as you came, you were gone, heading back to your table where your friend celebrate your arrival as if you’ve been away for years. Jack watches as you all cheers your drinks, and his heart warms a bit when you catch his eye one more time, winking and raising your glass to him ever so slightly.

He nods and heads back to his own table, determined that at the end of the night, he will get to you somehow. He only wants to have you within reach, talking with his teammates or dragging him out to the dance floor. Above all else, he wants you in his arm. So, he texts you, hoping you’ll invite him over and the night will officially begin, and he can be happy. He waits and continues to glance your way.

You never respond.

Call me friend but keep me closer

And I'll call you when the party's over

When Jack's phone buzzes loudly on his nightstand the first time, he ignores it. It’s late, and he has a big game tomorrow. When it buzzes again and continues, signaling an incoming call, he finally shifts his weight and grabs it.

It’s been a week since he saw you at the bar and even longer since you’d texted. You’ve also never called, which causes his heart to beat a little faster than it should. He presses answer.

“Hello?” He asks, hearing some brief static on the other end.

“Jack?”

Your voice sounds small, and he immediately sits up straighter in bed, suddenly wide awake.

“(Y/N)? Are you okay?”

He hears your sigh softly on the other end.

“Honestly,” You hiccup, “No. I’m wasted, and my best friend has my apartment keys, and they all don’t want to leave, but I feel sick, and my phone is almost dead, and I didn’t know who else to call in Jersey, and I-“

You continue rambling, and Jack can hear you softly sniffling in between words, and It takes him less than ten seconds to throw on a shirt, pants, and make a beeline toward his Range Rover keys.

“(Y/N)” He finally interrupts you, “Where are you? I’m coming to get you.”

He doesn’t hear you for a moment, and he thinks for a second that you hung up.

“No.” You suddenly say sternly, as if you just realized you called him. “Fuck, I’m so stupid. I shouldn’t have called you.”

As you finish, Jack can sense the panic starting to rise in your voice, and he knows that you’re falling deeper into your own head, and he has to pull you out before you disappear.

“Hey, don’t say that. But please, send me your location.”

“No.” You repeat, “You have a game tomorrow. You should be asleep.”

Jack's heart skips a beat when you mention his game. He didn’t know you followed his schedule. His mind begins to run a million places, different places, until he grounds himself and remembers the problem at hand.

“(Y/N),” He says it as hard as he can to force you into telling him where you are. “I’m not gonna be able to sleep until I know you’re home safe. Send me your location.”

It’s silent on the other end of the line, and after a moment, his phone lights up with your pinned location.

“Do not move. I’m about fifteen minutes away. Okay?”

“Okay.” You whisper back to him.

What should have been fifteen minutes turns into less than ten as Jack ignores every driver's safety training he’s ever had. He would do anything to be able to teleport to you, but instead, he goes as fast as he can.

When he pulls up to the crowded bar and doesn’t see you outside, he’s instantly filled with worry. His pulse continues to build until he sees you a small distance away from the entrance, sitting on the curb with your head in your hands.

As soon as he parks, rather badly, he bolts out of the car toward you. When he gets within a few feet of your form, your head snaps up. He watches as a mix of emotions crosses your face, and his heart finally does crumple when he sees a tear slide down your cheeks. It takes everything in him not to wipe it away as he kneels in front of you.

“Can you stand?” He asks softly.

You slowly nod, and he takes both your hands, helping you get to your feet. He watches as you wobble a bit too far to the left, and he catches you in his arms.

The second you’re in his hold, you melt into his touch, and he hates the way that he his entire body finally relaxes, knowing you are safe and in his arms.

Jack continues to steady you, feeling the weight of your body against his. He can smell the alcohol on your breath, and you’re way too cold for his liking after sitting outside. He grabs your shoes and phone and begins walking you toward his car. Once you’re there, he gets you into the vehicle, buckles you in, and hands you a bottle of water he’d thankfully grabbed from the fridge.

“There we go,” he says, making sure you’re set.

Your eyes follow him as he climbs into the driver's seat, and once he turns the car on, you break the silence.

“Thank you, Jack.” You whisper, your head falling a bit toward the window.

Jack focuses on the road as he makes his way back toward his apartment. He knows you’re in no state to be brought home alone, and he’d never forgive himself if something happened to you.

“Jack?” You speak again, and he hums. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” He means it. “I’ll always be here when you need me.”

He turns to face you briefly, and he has never seen you look so sad, and it crushes him all over again. He wants to talk to you, figure out what’s going wrong in that beautiful mind of yours, and do anything to fix it. But he knows that this conversation can be had at a later date. Instead, he turns on a radio, and when he steals another glance at your figure, you are asleep.

Jack drives slowly and carefully to his apartment, knowing he has the most precious cargo to him sitting in the passenger seat. When he finally pulls into the parking ramp and turns off the car, you are still dead to the world.

He quickly unbuckles and moves to get you, gently trying to shake you awake.

“Hey, (Y/N),” he whispers, “we’re here.”

You let out a soft groan and rub your eyes. “Can’t I just stay here? It’s so comfy.”

You snuggle deeper into the seat, and Jack thinks he will die. You look so goddamn adorable, and it’s driving him insane that he can’t kiss you.

“Sorry baby,” the nickname slips before he can stop it. “I gotta get you inside.”

He smiles at your pouty face, and he unbuckles your seatbelt. He lifts you out of the car and sets you down for a second, grabbing your things and handing you his keys before scooping you back into his arms.

You softly hum in contentment as your head lolls against his chest. Jack thinks you’ve dozed off again until you open your eyes slightly.

“You're pretty strong," you slur. “Clearly, hockey is good for a person.”

Jack lets out a deep chuckle as you snuggle deeper into his hold, and after a few minutes of struggle to get through doorways without hitting you on something and teamwork to open his door, you’re safe in his apartment.

Twenty minutes later, he’s helped you take off your makeup because he knows your skin care is essential, he’s gotten you water and Advil, and you're wrapped in his clothes and lying beneath his duvet.

As he watches you breathe, gathering a few things to sleep on the couch, he can’t help but feel a sense of protectiveness wash over him. He wants nothing more than to climb next to you, but he’ll resist.

He stares a bit longer when suddenly your eyes peel open.

“You have a staring problem, Jack.”

Your tone is teasing, but his entire body grows hot, and all he wants is to get the hell out of his bedroom. He tries to make his escape, but not before you speak again, and it stops him dead in his tracks.

“You know, I broke my own heart loving you first.”

#hockey #hockey boys #hockey imagine #hockey x reader #imagine #nhl imagine #nhl x reader #hockey fic #nhl hockey #jack hughes #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes x reader #new jersey #devils hockey #new jersey devils #nico hischier #nj devils #devils vs rangers #original writing

[summerslashers]

Meeting You: Thomas Hewitt x Reader

Summary: After moving to a small town in Texas, you bump into a certain Tommy Hewitt… literally.

Warnings: implied general anxiety/none

Authors Note: I don’t consider myself much of a writer but I do have fun with it so please be kind. This took forever but I’m somewhat happy with how it turned out. I’m probably going to write a different “meeting Tommy” fic though where it’s just the two of you.

It wasn’t a terribly long walk from your new home, the small shop just down the dusty dirt road and past the slaughterhouse. It was all very new to you, living in a small town all alone, but you tried to remain optimistic.

You took a deep breath as you approached the little shop, shaking your hands at your sides to rid yourself of the anxiety that stirred within you.

“Okay,” you whispered before stepping inside.

You hardly had the chance to hear the doorbells ring before you bumped into a very tall, very broad man, causing a wooden crate to go crashing to the ground, its contents falling out and scattering across the floor.

“I’m so sorry- I- I didn’t mean to-“ You didn’t even get the chance to fully look at the man you ran into, immediately kneeling to the ground and apologizing profusely. He set another wooden crate onto the floor with a loud thud, kneeling down as well to clean up the mess you made.

You leaned over to pick something up, both of your hands reaching for the same item. The two of you hesitated, retracting your hands just slightly before looking up at one another. You were immediately met with gentle blue eyes and a half-masked face mere inches from your own.

“I’m sorry-” you looked down, your cheeks warm and heart pounding hard in your chest. You picked up the stray item and offered it to the man so that he could put it in the crate that was now balanced atop another just like it. He took the small item from you, his calloused fingertips brushing gently against your fingers. You found yourself blushing even harder.

Meanwhile, Luda Mae sat behind the counter, a small smirk on her face at the interaction before her. She watched you help clean everything up with shaky hands, apologizing the entire time.

Once everything was back in the crate where it belonged, the two of you stood up. It was then that you realized just how large the man actually was. You hadn’t had the chance to notice with everything that had happened, far too worried about your silly mistake. You looked up at him.

“I’m really sorry-“ you fidgeted anxiously with your hands and offered a gentle smile. “I guess I didn’t make a very good first impression… I’m new here.”

Luda May spoke up from behind the counter with a smile. “Don’t you worry about that, hon. No harm done.” Usually she didn’t care much for strangers, but after seeing how kind you were to her boy, she couldn’t help but take an immediate liking to you. “It’s not often we get new folks around here. You can call me Luda Mae and that’s my boy, Tommy. He doesn’t talk much but he’s a real nice boy.”

You smiled up at him. “It’s nice to meet you, Tommy… and I’m sorry again about earlier. My name is y/n.”

You saw the corners of his lips upturn in the smallest smile. He couldn’t help it- you were just too cute. He had never met someone so kind to him. He had grown painfully used to people calling him cruel names or giving him ugly looks, but not you. You were sweet and caring.

“I live just down the street in the small ranch.” You pointed your finger in the general direction.

“Now that’s real close to our home, isn’t it, Tommy?” Luda Mae chimed in.

“You live in that really big house?” You asked Tommy, looking up into his pretty blue eyes.

He nodded and you smiled, a warm blush returning to your cheeks.

“Guess that makes us neighbors.”

Once again, you noticed the corners of Tommy’s lips upturn, and you blushed even harder. He was handsome- really handsome. His eyes were captivating and the little smiles he allowed you to see made your heart skip a beat. Not to mention he was incredibly tall, broad, and very strong.

“Did you walk here all by yourself?” Luda Mae questioned.

“Yes ma’am. I don’t own a car at the moment so I plan on walking where I need to go. I actually came here to ask about a job- if you’re hiring?”

“I could use the extra help,” she smiled. “You can start tomorrow, but I can’t have you walkin’ down here all on your own. Too many dangerous folk ‘round these parts. Lot of bikers comin’ through here causin’ problems.”

You nodded, not exactly sure what she wanted you to do. “I live alone, ma’am. I-I don’t-”

“Tommy would be more than happy to walk with you ‘n make sure you’re safe.” Luda Mae gave Tommy a nod.

You looked over at the man, worry written on your face. “I can’t ask you to do that-”

“Nonsense.” She cut you off. “You don’t mind, do you, Thomas?”

He looked into your eyes and shook his head. You smiled at his kindness.

“Besides, Tommy here works real close, just down at the slaughterhouse every mornin’. It’d be no trouble for him to bring you here n’ walk ya home.”

“Are you sure?” You fidgeted with your hands anxiously.

Tommy nodded, sincerity in his expression and body language. No one had ever cared about him and what he wanted like this, it gave him a warm feeling in his chest. He wanted to do this. He wanted to walk with you. Be by your side. Keep you safe.

“Thank you, Tommy. I really appreciate it.” You smiled.

Thomas was sure that he had never smiled so much in his entire life. That he had never felt this happy to be around someone before. From the moment you bumped into him, you were like a ray of sunshine that shined down on his dark and dreary life.

“I should probably get home soon,” you smiled apologetically. “I still have a lot of unpacking to do, but I promise I’ll be here first thing tomorrow morning.”

Luda Mae nodded, noticing that Tommy was still looking at you with a certain fondness in his eyes. “How’s about you join us for dinner tonight? Six o’clock.”

“I would love to.” Your smile widened. You had been so worried about meeting people, nervous about whether or not they would like you or if they would be kind. You couldn’t have asked for a better outcome. “Would you like me to show up early to help with anything?”

“Now aren’t you just the sweetest thing?” Luda Mae spoke fondly. “I can always use an extra hand in the kitchen.”

“Okay! I’ll be there,” you said.

“You get her home safe now, Thomas.” Luda Mae addressed him firmly before looking back at you. “It’s been so nice meeting you, sweetheart.”

“You too,” you smiled contently. “Thank you so much for everything.”

“Alright now. I’ll see you this evening.”

You looked up at Tommy as if to silently ask if he was ready to go.

He gave you a curt nod, and with that, the two of you headed towards the exit side by side, excited for the walk ahead of you.

#Thomas hewitt #tommy hewitt #thomas hewitt x reader #tommy hewitt x reader #leatherface #leatherface x reader

[oleander-nin]

The Weight Of A Letter(12)

A/N: Trying to make the chapters longer since I know you all hate the shorter ones, but this one still isn't too long. Sorry. Any criticism is welcome, constructive or not. This is supposed to be a gender neutral reader, so if I screwed up somewhere, please tell me.

Taglist? If you want to be added or removed, just say so: @ssak-i @sinister-things @ancreativename @t0ta11y-n0t-cup1d @idiotreblogger @whygz @lexiechr@10yagurlchip01 @rex-ray @sunsersilversky @theavianlady @sspiderj

Part 1 - Previous - Next

Words: 2393

Content warnings: Slight paranoia near the end, but none else I think?

Chapter 12: A Consequential Decision

I look at him as if he was insane, a laugh being pulled from my chest. He had to be pulling my leg. “You wrote me a love letter. The guy who’s been glaring at me this whole class? The guy who’s so far found a way to insult me in every sentence?”

“Of course,” He pauses, glancing back at the open letter. “(Y/n). I wrote you those letters. I’m Von Ryan.”

“I thought your name was CK.”

CK, or Von Ryan, did not seem amused by my comment. He glares at my smug grin, clearly holding himself back from insulting me more. His jaw ticks to the side as he takes a deep breath. I narrow my eyes as my grin falters. For my claimed secret admirer, he sure seems to be annoyed with my every move. The complete opposite of what the letters preached. There was no way he wrote them. I just needed to prove it.

“Von Ryan is an alias.” He says through gritted teeth. I roll my eyes. There was no way he was serious. 

“Sure it is.” I say coolly. I put the letter back into my bag while I attempt to hold myself back from punching him. If he really was the author, I was going to burn all the letters.

CK grumbles, his face going almost red with anger. “Well I’m sorry if the way I show love isn’t up to your standards, your majesty.”

His seething words nearly make me laugh, the way they drip down with loathing a lover could never muster, causing me to be even more certain he was not the one who wrote the letters. He couldn’t’ve, not with how he was acting. Either that, or this really was how he ‘loved’.

“How do I prove I wrote the letters?” He asks, his voice still tight. I look over at him, thinking it over. I wasn’t sure anything could make me believe him.

“Why did you start writing the letters?” I ask. If he answered enough of the questions mostly correctly, I’d be less inclined to not believe him. His face softens a bit and he shifts his weight, writing down the last equation on the paper.

“Because you’re everything I want.”

I roll my eyes. I wasn’t sure what I wanted him to answer, but hearing something so simple, so… easy. It wasn’t convincing. I glance him over, scowling. I doubted I would ever be convinced. “Sure lover boy. When did you send the first letter?”

He crosses his eyes for a second, seemingly thinking. He counts on his hand, his face scrunched up in concentration. “You’ve gotten around twenty, and I’ve given them every school day except the days you were gone, so around… three weeks ago?”

I nod, taking it. I had no idea when they started either way, so I couldn’t confirm or deny this. I chew on my cheek, trying to think of more questions. I hear CK huff, his cheeks puffing out in frustration. I couldn’t help but think he looked like a frog. A really, really, angry frog. 

“What if I take you on a date tomorrow night? Somewhere nice? I’ll try to redeem myself and you’ll see I’m not so bad.”

I tilt my head, considering it. I really didn’t want to ever spend time with him again, but dates usually involved food or fun activities… No. I refuse to fall for his tricks, let alone him. The writer of the letters was passionate, if not a bit crazy from most recent letters. I eye him up. He could fall in line with crazy, but passionate didn’t seem his style.

His eye twitches at my contemplation, a large hand running over his face. “I’ll buy you dinner.”

He waits another second for me to answer before he groans. “And dessert.”

“Deal.”

I grin, shouldering my bag as the bell rings. Even if he was a stuck up jerk, I could deal with dinner. It would be easy enough to leave if I needed to. I push past the other kids leaving, heading towards my locker. I still needed to tell Irma I wasn’t going home with her. Worry rolls in my stomach and I grimace at the thought. She would let me, of course, but I still felt bad. It’s not like I could tell her where I was going. I chew on my cheek, reshouldering my backpack out of habit. I guess I should also tell her about CK. Maybe she could talk me out of the date or knock some sense into me. 

I look up at the decal on the wall, the murals of past students who walked through these halls. The bright colors were stark in contrast with the gray wall, rainbows and patterns walking with me until the wall ends and I turn the corner. My eyes automatically land on Irma, her hair bunched up in a loose bun as she leans against my locker. Due to a spontaneous basketball meeting, she wasn’t able to see the letter this morning. It was also the perfect excuse for how I got my phone back. She wasn’t with me this morning, so she couldn’t confirm or deny how I got it. I just hoped she wouldn’t poke too many holes in my story.

I walk up next to her, nodding in thanks as she shifts away from my locker. I grab needed books and homework, depositing them in my bag while taking the letter and flower out to hand to Irma. Her eyebrows raise in surprise as she grins, knocking her shoulder against my own.

“Lover boy struck again, huh?”

I shrug, unsure when to tell her about the contents. This letter was more concerning than sweet, and now that CK was claiming to be the author, everything was even more complicated. I lean against my now closed locker, letting her read the note in peace. I could tell her of our learned information after.

As Irma reads the letter, her eyebrows furrow and a frown sets on her usually grinning face. I twirl the red rose that came with the letter in my hand, the smooth stalk having been stripped of its thorns. Irma carefully folds the letter and puts it back into the envelope, letting out a frustrated sigh.

“I know I spoke out in defense of letter guy, but he’s really making me regret that decision.”

“You notice it too?” I ask, grinning slightly out of relief. At least I wasn’t just being paranoid this time.

“Notice it? (Y/n), it’s practically jumping out at us. He’s not exactly being subtle. “You’re my one and only, and I would do anything to have you. You wouldn’t survive without me.” Yeah, that’s something you’d hear in a horror movie, not a love letter.” Irma runs her hand down her face, groaning. “I’m sorry they’re getting worse. I was hoping you’d have this to cheer you up. If the next ones are… Unpleasant, like this one is, I think we should tell the principal so they can find the writer.”

“I know who wrote them. Err, I know someone who claims they wrote them.” I put stress on the word ‘claims’, grimacing as I think back to our earlier interaction. Irma looks at me, her brown eyes muddled with confusion. She purses her lips, thinking of what to say, but I speak first.

“His name’s CK, no idea of a last name. He’s in my Physics class.”

Irma nods, sighing. “Okay, well we got that figured out then. What do you want to do about it? Report him? Let it keep going? Ignore him?”

I laugh nervously. “How about going on the date he asked me on?”

Irma stares at me and I shrink back, twirling the flower faster in my hands. She sighs, leaning her weight against the locker and letting her head hit the side. “That’s definitely an option, I guess. Do you like him?”

I snort. “No. He’s detestable.”

“Then you agreed to a date, why exactly?”

“He said he’d pay.”

Irma groans, taking me by the shoulders and shaking me. “(Y/n), food should not be a good bribe. I will buy you dinner if that’s what you want.”

“Yeah but I want to waste his money, not yours.”

Irma sighs, her hands tightening around my shoulder for a moment before loosening. “Just… be careful, okay? He’s probably just playing up the dramatics of the letters, but I’ll get my dad to let you borrow his phone tomorrow in case something goes wrong.”

“Oh, about that,” I say, fiddling in my pocket. I pull out my phone, perfectly pristine and fixed by Donnie. I smile nervously at Irma, watching her face carefully. “I got it back today.”

“What? When, how?”

“They dropped it off at the front of the school right after you left for basketball practice. They couldn’t hang around long either way, they had to run off to college.”

“You never mentioned they were a college student.”

“Never came up.”

Irma lets out an exasperated breath, pressing her forehead against mine. “You are insufferable. Now c’mon, my dad’s waiting for us.”

I suck in a sharp breath, my hands clenching at my sides. I try to force a smile on my face, hoping Irma wouldn’t be upset. Realistically I knew she wouldn’t, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling off. “About that… A friend invited me over for dinner. I’m not sure when I’ll get back, so I’ll stay in my apartment tonight. Tell Tony I say hi though.”

Irma chews on her cheek. “Oh. Well, you have your phone now, so… Just, call me or Tony if anything happens. And you know you can still stay with us, right?”

I nod, sighing. “I know, I just… If I get back later than 9 I’m going to go to my apartment. The police cleared it a long time ago, so I might as well start getting used to it. I promise I’ll be safe.”

Irma nods, her face pinched in worry. “That’s all I can ask for.”

Irma pulls me into a tight hug before walking to the front of the school as I duck towards the back. I pull out my phone, skimming over the instructions Mikey had sent me. I was supposed to meet Donnie outside a restaurant a couple blocks from the school so he could show me where the lair was. I shoot a text to Donnie, letting him know I am on my way. I navigate the halls, ducking between straggling students until I reach the side door that would give me the straightest path to Donnie.

The door swings shut behind me as I move across the faculty parking lot in the back of the school. I could sense someone watching me as I walked, shadows in the corner of my eye darting between buildings and over rooftops. I couldn’t help but feel a bite of disappointment as my anxiety grew. I had an idea of who wrote the letters, my apartment has been cleared for weeks, and I haven’t had anything major happen in a while. I was really hoping these stupid hallucinations would die down. A bitter feeling mixed with the pain in my chest from my growing paranoia, turning into an ugly concoction of frustration. I try to keep my face schooled into a smile, not wanting to be grumpy when I get to Donatello. The last thing I want to be is a downer.

When I make it to the meeting point, I look around for Donnie. I huff when I don’t see him immediately.  Despite being an anthropomorphic turtle, he was really hard to spot. I turn to face the shadows to the alley when I notice slight movement just inside my peripheral vision, hoping to spot my guide. Once I can make out Donnie’s figure in the dark, I smile at him as he motions for me to follow him. He starts to slink back into the shadows and I follow, swallowing the lump sitting in my throat. Being led through an alleyway was not what I was expecting when he said he’d show me the way.

Donnie continued to lead me down the alleyway, my nerves climbing up higher and higher, goosebumps starting to pop up along my arms and legs. My poor decision making skills were starting to dawn on me. I barely knew this guy and I was willingly following him into a creepy alleyway, and no one knew where I was. Just how stupid am I? I exhale slowly, adjusting my bag on my shoulders so I could wipe my now clammy hands on my pants. Donnie just kept walking ahead of me, seeming to not be too worried about whether or not I was following behind. He stops at the end of the alleyway and I look around confused. There weren’t any entrances or openings back here.

“Glad you could make it. Are you ready to go?” Donnie asks as he lifts up a manhole cover I didn’t notice before. I stare at him, wondering if he's joking. I nearly gag at the smell that wafts up, trying to hold my stomach down. He doesn’t actually expect me to go in there, right?

“Go where?” I ask, praying this was all a big joke. There was no way he wanted me to go in a sewer. That’s repulsive at best. I grimace at the thought, taking a small step back.

“To the lair, dum dum.” Donnie moves the cover fully off of the maintenance hole, gesturing towards the opening as he waits for me to climb inside. I open and close my mouth a bit, trying to find the words.

“Donnie,” I say gently, as if he wasn’t aware. “That’s an opening to the sewers.”

“Scoff.” Donnie says, irritated at my comment while I cover my mouth with my hands. I really didn’t mean to say that. “Where did you think we’d live? A mansion?”

“Sorry, just wasn’t really expecting the sewers I guess. I didn’t mean to offend you.” Donnie looks at me for a moment before gesturing towards the hole. 

“In.”

I hesitate for a moment before slumping in defeat, grabbing hold of the ladder and climbing down into the dark sewers.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt donnie #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #donnie rottmnt #donatello #tmnt donatello #donatello hamato #yandere story #tw yandere #yandere rottmnt #yandere tmnt #yandere #yandere donnie x reader #donnie #yandere donnie #rottmnt yandere donnie #yandere rottmnt x reader #tmnt x reader #donnie x reader #yandere donatello #yandere donatello x reader #yandere rottmnt donnie #rottmnt donnie x reader #rottmnt x reader #tw stalking #tw paranoia #the weight of a letter

[undercovergamer]

✨Laughing Your Worries Away✨

I couldn’t decide which pic was better so this one has two

⚠️This fic focuses mainly on tickling. Do not read it if that upsets you.⚠️ also contains angst

After sort of becoming Kaveh’s “emotional support oni”, he felt that he should come up with more fun ways of cheering him up whenever he’s sad. No Kavehs were harmed in the writing of this fic.

Content warning: Kaveh is very anxious in the beginning which can be upsetting to read. Hi I edited the summary bc it was too long lol

Note: This is a silly scenario I made up with a friend. Basically Itto is in Sumeru because lazy writing and he’s staying with Alhaitham and Kaveh until he returns to Inazuma, also because lazy writing. We don’t need logic in silly fics like this, right?

Word Count: 3303

“Argh! It’s no use! Something will go wrong, I just know it!”

“Nuh uh! I bet it’ll be lots of fun, actually.“

“Anything can happen, which means anything can go wrong!”

“Or… it means anything can go right, instead. Right?”

“No it doesn’t! That’s not how it works… Do you even know how unlucky I’ve been recently? Who knows when that’ll end?!”

Kaveh was overthinking an event he was going to attend in a few days, panicking over all the possible accidents and mistakes that could ruin everything. He was sure something would go horribly wrong, just not what exactly. It was really stressing him out. Itto was trying his best to help, but Kaveh’s just couldn’t listen. Every time a solution came up, another problem came down.

“Kaveh, please, try to be more rational here, alright? Just think of all the good things that can happen instead! Like... what if you win a prize?” Itto suggested, trying to comfort him.

“Oh, please. How I wish I could! What if something breaks? Or- Or catches fire?! What if it rains and I forget my keys again? What if- I just- I- I can’t- Ugh!! I’m gonna make a complete fool of myself!” Kaveh was stress-pacing back and forth in his room and messing with his hair. He was too anxious to think straight, poor guy.

“Hey, hey, easy now. Take deep breaths.” Itto was trying to de-escalate the situation.

“No! I can’t! This is serious!”

“Please, you need to chill for a bit… all this stress isn’t good for you. Let’s just sit down and we’ll-”

“Ugh, it’s no use, Itto! I can’t just ignore my problems like that! I’m sorry…” Kaveh turned around put his hands in his face for a moment before groaning and anxiously pacing back and forth again. Itto sighed, trying to keep his patience. He didn’t want to be upset with Kaveh, it’s not like he can help that he’s anxious. Hmm, what to do…

“Ah… do you need a hug?” Itto asked, extending his arms and smiling. “You sound like you really need one. C’mere!” Kaveh turned to him with tears in his eyes. If words didn’t work, surely actions would, right?

“F-Fine. M-Maybe just- *sniffle*… j-just one h-h-hug.” Kaveh had tears streaming down his face the moment he accepted Itto’s hug, collapsing into his arms and sobbing. Itto hugged tight and comforted him while he cried, making sure to hold his balance.

“There, there… sshh… it’s gonna be ok. You’re safe… I’ve got you.” Itto said calmly, giving him a gentle headpat. He was starting to tear up as well, but held it together so Kaveh wouldn’t feel worse.

“H-H-How *hic* d-do you *hic* know??” Kaveh sobbed, burying his face in Itto’s shoulder. He was always surprised by how gentle Itto could be, unlike his usual high energy and loudness. It always caught him off-guard a little bit.

“You’ll feel better after you’ve cried, trust me. It’s okay… Just let it aaall out. And remember to breathe...” Itto held him close, gently stroking his back and slowly rocking back and forth.

“Take a deep breath in through your nose.” He said, inhaling and holding his breath for a few seconds. “Hold it for a bit... then, exhale through your mouth. Like this!” He said, slowly exhaling to demonstrate. Eventually, the architect began sobbing less and breathing more, trying to calm down with the breathing exercise Itto suggested. It seemed to be working fine.

After a while, Kaveh could finally compose himself and stop crying. He stayed in the hug for a bit before letting go to wipe his tears away.

“There you go… Do you feel better now?” Itto asked softly, handing him a tissue.

“Yeah… I-… I really needed that. Thank you.” Kaveh replied, blowing his nose into the tissue before throwing it in the bin.

“How do you feel?”

“I feel... fine, I guess.”

“You look sad…”

“Oh… no, no, I’m not sad. I just… ugh…” Kaveh sighed. He was actually feeling better than before, but it was only a matter of time before he’d start overthinking again. He felt so hopless… Itto needed to solve that; he knew exactly how.

“Hmm… you know, I think I know something else that could cheer you up.” Itto said with a sudden grin.

“Wh-What are you doing? D-Don’t- No funny business!” Kaveh felt nervous. Every time Itto had that expression, he’d conduct mischief.

“Hey, c’mon, I’m not gonna do anything bad!” He looked really suspicious… definitely up to no good.

“I-I know, but- uh- d-don’t look at me like that! Ooh, I just KNOW you’re planning something…” Kaveh glared at him and took a step back.

“Heheheh. Oh you are absolutely right, my friend...” Itto chuckled and began wiggling his fingers in the air. Kaveh’s eyes widened as he realized what that meant.

“D-Don’t even THINK about it! Don’t you dare!” Kaveh protested, but it didn’t have any effect as Itto slowly came closer, chuckling to himself.

“I’m gonna get you~” he teased.

“S-Stay back, or I’ll- uh…” Kaveh backed up against a wall, realizing he’d have to make a run in for it.

“Or what, you’ll tell Haitham?” Itto teased. Kaveh suddenly tried to escape by running past Itto to get out of the room. But of course it backfired as Itto quickly caught him and held him tight with a playful hug from behind. “Haha! Gotcha!”

“Agh! Let me go, you brute!” Kaveh squirmed, trying to break free, but he wasn’t strong enough.

“Hey! That’s not very nice!” Itto replied, still smiling with mischief.

“I-…! I uh… s-sorry… I-I just-”

“Hey now, no guilt! It’s alright, buddy! Don’t worry. I’m gonna cheer you up in the most effective way I know!”

“B-But this is unfair! I can barely move!” Kaveh complained, looking down in frustration.

“Good thing I can! Heheh. Are you ticklish, Kaveh?” Itto asked, playfully forming his hands into claws on Kaveh’s sides.

The architect began nervously giggling at the sight, but tried to stay cool. “D-Dohon’t be ridiculous! O-Of course nohot!”

“Reeaaally? Are you sure about that?” Itto teased, clawing one single time, resulting in a jump and surprised squeal out of Kaveh. Itto laughed at his reaction.

“H-Hey! That’s not funny! L-Let me go!” Kaveh giggled against his will, trying to break free. His face was slowly turning red from embarrassment.

“Sounds pretty ticklish to me! This’ll be fun!” Itto said teasingly, slowly beginning to tickle Kaveh.

“ACK- D-Don’t you dare!! Y-You- hngh...” The architect twitched and yelped, trying very hard to keep his giggles in by covering his mouth.

“Tickle tickle~ come on! It’s not fun if you won’t laugh!” Itto suddenly started tickling faster, scribbling over Kaveh’s ribs. “Tickle tickle tickle~!”

Kaveh squealed at the sudden sensation and began laughing and squirming. “EEEHEHEHEHE!! Ahahahahahahahaha!! Nohohohoho!!” He tried is best to break free from the oni’s grasp, but the hug remained strong.

“Haha, got you! Tickle tickle tickle!” Itto giggled along with Kaveh, spider-tickling his ribs and tummy.

“EEK! Ahahahahahaha!! Ittohoho!! Plehehehehease!!” Kaveh squealed, trying to bend forward to protect himself. Itto responded by lifting him up in a bear hug and tickling his waist. The man let out a scream before laughing and kicking like crazy. “PUHUT MEHEHE DOHOHOHOWN!! GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!”

“Grrr! There’s no escape from the tickle monster! Mwahahaha!” Itto laughed, playfully putting him down and letting go before tickling his sides. “Tickle tickle tickle!!”

“EEK!! BahahahaHAHAHAHA!! G-Gehehet awahahahahahay!!” Kaveh laughed, trying to push Itto away.

“Hehehehe! I got you~!” Itto teased, playfully following Kaveh down as he lost balance and squirmed to the floor. Itto stopped tickling to make sure he didn’t get hurt.

“S-Seriously? The… huff… the tickle monster?! Come on… that’s… huff… that’s just childish…!” Kaveh said, panting heavily.

“Hahahaha! Y’know, you haven’t told me to stop yet. Are you having fun?” Itto asked with a giddy grin on his face. He was sat on the floor, next to the architect.

“I- uh, y-you- um…” Kaveh’s face turned red from embarrassment. He wanted the floor to swallow him whole.

Itto laughed. “Ah, I get it. You’re embarrassed, aren’t you?”

“H-How did you know?!” Kaveh questioned, feeling flustered. Itto was probably gonna tell everyone, he thought. Oh how humiliating…

“Well for one, you haven’t said ‘stop it’ even once, and uh… well, your face got all red when I pointed that out. Hahahaha!”

“S-Stop laughing! It’s not funny!” Kaveh covered his face with his hands.

“Hehehe, sorry! I’m not laughing at you, I just think it’s silly. Anyway, do you want me to stop tickling you yet? Or should I continue?” Itto chuckled and wiggled his fingers above Kaveh.

“Y-You better n-not-… pfft-” Kaveh started giggling from anticipation again, trying to keep it in.

“Listen, all you have to do is tell me ‘stop’ and I’ll stop, alright? I promise!” Itto said, giving him a friendly smile.

“It- It can’t be that easy…” Kaveh said under his breath, but Itto heard him anyway.

“Oh, but it is! I don’t wanna make you panic, y’know. I’m still tickling you because I know you’re enjoying yourself.” Itto playfully poked his tongue out and chuckled to himself.

Kaveh got nervous. “O-Ok fine, y-you got me… uh… p-please don’t tell anyone! I-I don’t know what I’d do if- uh-…”

“Hey, hey! Relax! I won’t tell a soul. Not even Ushi! My lips are sealed. No one shall know! I promise!” Itto said, giving Kaveh a reassuring pat on the head.

“Thank you…” Kaveh said, sighing with relief.

“No problemo, hombre! Now… where else are you ticklish?” Itto asked, tickling Kaveh’s sides and ribs without warning.

“EEK! AAHAHAHAHahahahaha!! ITTO NAHAHAHA!!” Kaveh squealed, squirming around on the floor. Again, he was surprised with how gentle Itto was. He thought the tickling would hurt at first, but oh how wrong he was. The oni was as gentle as he was merciless… in a playful way of course.

“Hehehe! Tickle tickle, Kaveh!” Itto teased, tickling down to his tummy and waist as high pitched laughter and squeals filled the room. “Just let me know when you’ve had enough, alright? Say ‘okay’ if you heard that!”

“EHEHEHE!! Ohohokahahahahay!! AhahahAHAHAHAHA!! N-NOT THERE!!” Kaveh screeched, trying to roll away from the tickles.

“Aha! A weak spot! Heheheh, I win!” Itto exclaimed, playfully squeezing the architect’s waist.

After a little while, Itto heard a voice from outside the room.

“What’s with all the noise? What are y-… …oh.” It was Alhaitham, checking the situation out of curiosity. “Itto, what are you doing..?” he asked, rolling his eyes at the scene.

“Oh hey, man! I’m just tickling Kaveh! He was feeling stressed so I thought I’d distract him for a while!” Itto replied, poking all over Kaveh’s ribs.

“EEK! NohohoHOHOHO!! AAH! Not like thahahahat!!” Kaveh protested, covering his sensitive ribs with his arms.

“Don’t you think that has the opposite effect..?” Alhaitham asked, confused.

“Naah he’s fine. It’s working pretty well, I’d say.” Itto giggled to himself and began playfully squeezing his sides instead.

“AAHAHAHAHAHA!! AHALHAHAITHAHAM HEHEHEHELP!!” Kaveh screeched, squirming even more and trying really hard to roll away and escape.

Itto laughed and stopped tickling him. “You good, bro?” He asked, helping him sit up and patting him on the back.

“Haha… hah… y-yeah…” Of course Alhaitham had to show up. Kaveh could simply die from embarrassment.

“Kaveh, I hope you realize you don’t have to just lie there and take it.” Alhaitham said, looking down at him.

“Naah man, don’t worry about it! He’s fine, really! We-” Kaveh quickly covered Itto’s mouth and hissed “Sshhh!! You weren’t supposed to say anything!”

Alhaitham rolled his eyes. “Kaveh, for your own good you should at least try to fight back. It’s not as hard as you’d think.” He said, looking at Itto.

“Whoa whoa, hang on, are you saying I’m weak? Ha! That is simply absurd! How dare you?” Itto scoffed, crossing his arms.

“No, that’s not what I meant, Itto. Let me show you.” Alhaitham quickly poked his side, making him jump and protest.

“Wha- Hey! Don’t do that! I’m not- I’m not ticklish! I just- pfft-” Itto was interrupted by yet another poke, this time from Kaveh who was now curiously poking away at his ribs, sending the oni into a giggling fit.

“Hehehey! Nohohohohahahaha!” He giggled, trying to defend himself.

“Wow, no way! I never would’ve guessed an oni like you would be so ticklish!” Kaveh said, chuckling to himself.

“Hahahaha! I’m nahahahahat!!”

“You are! Tickle tickle tickle!”

“Nohohoho!! Pfft- stahahahap!!” Itto managed to push Kaveh’s hands away to stop him from tickling. “Ohoho, you’re not gonna get me that easily! You’re in trouble now!” he said, grinning.

“W-Wahahait nohoho! A-Alhaitham, do somethihing!” Kaveh pleaded, giggling nervously.

“I’ve got better things to do. I’m sorry, Kaveh.” Alhaitham replied.

“B-But-”

“See ya.”

“No! NO WAIT!” Alhaitham left the room and Kaveh started squirming, trying to escape his playful demise.

“Heheheh, looks like ol’ Haitham can’t help you now, huh?” Itto said with a somewhat menacing grin.

“Oh, by the way,” Alhaitham poked his head through the doorway. “Itto, get his hips.”

“WHAT?! D-Don’t tell him that!! Are you crazy?!” Kaveh yelled, glaring daggers into Alhaitham.

“Ooh, you don’t say~?” Itto already guessed that area was particularly sensitive, but decided to play along for the sake of evil.

“Mhm. Anyway, see ya.” The scribe simply smirked and left the scene, closing the door.

“Alhaitham, you are SO DEAD after this!!” Kaveh yelled angrily, but he started giggling uncontrollably when he heard Itto’s sinister chuckle. That grin sent shivers down his spine. The anticipation was through the roof!

“I-Itto, wait! Y-You don’t have to- pfft-hehehe nohohohoho!! Wahahait!!” He tried, and failed, to crawl away in time.

“I’m gonna get you~! Hehehe!” Itto caught him before he could escape.

“Nohohoho!” Kaveh quickly covered his sensitive hips as best as he could.

“Oh, that just won’t do.” Itto could simply move Kaveh’s arms himself, but he was worried that’d make him panic. So instead, he decided tickling them away was a safer option.

“EEK! AhahaHAHAHAHAHA!! NOHOHOT THAHAHAHAT!!” Kaveh squealed when Itto began rapidly poking all over his ribs and tum, with more fingers this time. Why on earth did that tickle so bad?!

“Hehe, this is fun! You’re no match for my signature ten-finger-pokes! Hahaha!” Itto bragged, giggling along with Kaveh’s laughter. Soon enough, the architect gave in to his instincts and tried to cover his ribs with his arms instead. That’s when Itto’s hands quickly latched onto the architect’s hips, summoning a surprised squeal.

“Waitwaitwaitwait nohohoho!! Nononono don’t you DARE!! I- ehehehehe!! Plehehehease!!” Kaveh grabbed Itto’s wrists, but wasn’t strong enough to pull them away.

“Heheheh, you haven’t said ‘stop’ yet, buddy. Still having fun? Hmm?” Itto teased, laughing when Kaveh’s face turned red.

“J-Just you wait! You’ll be sorry!! I’ll get my revehehEHEHEHENGE!! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!” Itto began rapidly squeezing his hips. Kaveh screamed and arched his back, kicking and flailing around, unable to struggle properly. His wild laughter even rose an octave or two. Those ticklish shockwaves were so bad he couldn’t think straight!

“Hahaha! Aw, does it tickle? Kitchy kitchy koo!” Itto teased, laughing with Kaveh.

“AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! PLEHEHEHEASE!! N-NAHAHAT THEHEHEHERE!!” Kaveh screeched, shaking his head and desperately trying to push Itto’s hands away. He had been laughing so much that tears were starting to fall from his eyes.

“Should I stop?” Itto asked, smiling playfully, switching to gently scribbling on Kaveh’s tum to make his laughter less frantic.

“EHEHEHEHE!! Y-Yehehehes!! Plehehehease stohohop!!” Kaveh pleaded. Itto stopped tickling immediately and helped his buddy sit up. Kaveh was panting heavily and wiping away his tears of mirth, with a tired smile on his face.

“Whoa, looks like I broke you there. A-Are you ok?? …Did I go too far?” Itto asked, suddenly feeling worried.

“Ha… haha… I-I’m fine… hehehe…!” Kaveh replied, catching his breath while still giggling a little bit. His hair was a mess after all that squirming.

“Are you sure? You look exhausted...”

“Hahaha… ehehe… haha… I-It’s fine, really… I… I had fun…” Kaveh said, smiling at the oni. He looked pretty happy!

“Really? That’s awesome! Hahaha! I’m just glad I didn’t overwhelm you too badly. Here, let me help!” Itto stood up and reached his hand out so he could help Kaveh up.

“Thanks… hehe… phew… th-that was a lot..!”

“Take it easy now, breathe. Do you feel better now?” He asked happily.

“Huh? What do you…” Kaveh thought for a moment. Thanks to Itto, he had completely forgotten his worries. “Huh… I actually feel really happy! I feel so much better!” He smiled brightly, feeling grateful for the oni’s help.

“Hahaha! I’m so glad to hear that! Really glad you had fun, Kaveh.” Itto replied excitedly, giving him a tight, playful hug.

“Hngh… c-can’t… b-breathe..!” Kaveh wheezed.

“Oops! Oh sorry, hahaha!” Itto loosened the hug and laughed happily. “Hey, do you need water? I can go get some for you!”

“N-No! D-Don’t leave yet...” Kaveh said, hugging him tighter.

“Huh? What’s wrong?”

“N-Nothing. I just… just wait… please.” He was feeling a bit overwhelmed and needed the hug to calm down fully.

“Aw, ok! We’ll hug for as long as you need, buddy!” Itto held him close and gently rocked back and forth to help him chill.

After a bit of silence, Kaveh took a deep breath to compose himself. He had something important to say now that his brain was working again.

“…Itto, I-... thank you for cheering me up. I-It means a lot to me. That was really nice of you, I… I appreciate it. A lot. Thank you so much…” he said, hugging him closer.

“Aww, no problem! That’s so sweet of you to say! I’m really glad I could help. Let me know next time you’re feeling down, and I’ll tickle the sadness away!” Itto playfully tickled Kaveh’s sides for a bit.

“EEK! Hehehey! Nohohoho!” Kaveh jumped and squirmed away from the hug.

“Hahaha! See how easy it is? You look so happy now!” Itto exclaimed, stopping the tickles again.

“Haha... That’s not gonna work every time, though! Please, make sure you ask first. Sometimes I don’t want to be touched at all.” Kaveh said, placing a boundary.

“Gotcha! I’ll make sure to always ask first! You have my word on it. No discomfort on my watch!”

“Thank you, Itto. But don’t go thinking I’ll let you off the hook without revenge! Just you wait.”

“Hahaha! No problem, my guy! I won’t make it easy for you, though!” Itto said, giving him a playful look. Then he pointed at him and said, “You, my good sir, need to drink water. Like… right now. C’mon!”

“Haha, alright. Fine.” Kaveh replied, following him to the kitchen.

After they both hydrated, Itto started another conversation.

“Let’s go outside! I bet I can help you plan for that event!” he said.

“A-Are you sure? There’s a lot to consider…”

“Of course I’m sure! Not to brag or anything, but I’m a PRO at organizing events!”

“Well, we’re not exactly organizing it...”

“Hey, trust me! I know what I’m doing! We can come up with ideas together and write them down. And you can get inspiration from nature itself! How cool is that??”

“Oh alright, but no sudden decisions! We need to give each idea a good amount of thought first.”

“Suuure, of course… Hahahaha!”

Once they went for a walk outdoors, Itto continued to passionately rant about all the event’s possibilities while Kaveh listened and took notes. It felt nice to hear suggestions from an excited perspective rather than an anxious one, he thought. He still couldn’t believe how tickling actually helped him calm down of all things. And he certainly couldn’t believe how Alhaitham just betrayed him like that… but that was for future Kaveh to think about. Now, it was time to chill and brainstorm with Itto.

#lee!kaveh #ler!itto #ticklish!kaveh #tickle fic #tickle fluff #genshin impact tickle #sfw tickle community #genshin impact tickling #genshin tickle #genshin tickling #my private twashcan

[finnycomet]

like real brothers, or even closer!

sorry i had no idea what to name this, that three buckets quote stuck out in my mind so i picked that. but i HAD to write a tickle fic for fern. i also practically had to physically force myself to post this. enjoy!

finn and fern were laid on one of the many grassy hills surrounding them, deciding to stop on the way home after fern had (hesitantly, and with some persuasion of finn) tagged along with finn for an adventure. it was at least a nice day, so why not, he figured? the two just hanging out together seemed to be steadily turning into a common occurrence as of late.

recently, fern found himself slowly becoming a bit iffy on monster fighting and dungeon crawling and such, since now it only ever seemed to remind him of being finn, and that reminded him of a whole package of other things he’d rather not think about.

but something they found they both still enjoyed was just skygazing. they often liked to lay down in the grass or on the top of the treehouse together, count the clouds, or the stars. they’d talk about everything, or nothing. which is what they found themselves doing now! but today, fern just seemed… off.

well, he always seemed a little off. in a way that finn couldn’t fully put his finger on. and he wasn’t talking about his grassy appearance, or the way he talked to himself up on the roof, or how finn noticed sometimes his movements would get a little rigid. those were all things he’d learnt to get used to, eventually.

but its like fern was never truly happy, or even content. admittedly, he did express that a lot… mostly through anger or self deprecation. but even on a good day, finn could still see the misery flickering behind his eyes like the subtle flame of a candle.

finn tried to accept that thats just the way fern is, because he doesn’t want to pry at fern for something he isn’t even sure he could help with. but each day, it got increasingly harder to ignore seeing his… friend? or he supposed, brother, so unhappy.

especially today however, he seemed more distant than usual. as much as finn tried to help fern with advice or attempts to reassure him, it never really seemed to do much in the end. and the last thing he wanted was for him to feel worse.

he knew that fern wasn’t having the best time in terms of figuring out his identity, but he couldn’t help but feel like there was something more. something that he wouldn’t open up about.

he wasn’t sure how to help, but he did want to. talking about it would probably be the first step. whew, why was this kinda nerve wracking? the human collected his thoughts— synchronous to him collecting blades of grass below him, picking at them one by one.

“uh, by the way fern… are you doing okay? like… i’ve just noticed you seem pretty sad. or not sad but, i dunno, generally troubled maybe? not just today, but kinda all the times. if you don’t mind me asking, why? whats on your mind dude? you can tell me anything, you know? i’m just kinda worried.”

hm. that came out a bit more unsteady than he was hoping it would.

fern, seemingly disturbed from deeply zoning out at the endless blue above them, peered over at finn with a glimpse of annoyance on his face, to which was finn’s cue to suddenly feel guilty for even saying anything. but he figured he’d acknowledge finn’s concerns with some sort of answer.

“right. uh… i dunno. i mean i do know— but… its all just so… i doubt you would… ugh. there are a lot of reasons, finn.”

finn waited patiently for the other to continue, but after about ten long seconds passed with nothing else but a sigh from fern, he guessed that was all from him.

well! that didn’t exactly get them anywhere!

he let a few more pass as he thought about his next course of actions, now ripping up small chunks of grass as he did so.

clearly, when it came to emotions, verbal communication wasn’t exactly either of their strong points. something more to have in common, at least. so maybe trusty old physical affection would work. that was something he understood!

“if you can’t explain, would you… want a squoze? would that make you feel better?” finn languidly sat himself up, already anticipating the answer to be affirmative.

“mm… maybe.” fern figured it would at least help a little. so he followed, crawling towards finn, and leaning back against him as he got the life (oddly comfortingly) squeezed out of him.

“…yyyeah okay, it helps.” he sheepishly admitted. finn beamed at this, and remained hugging fern. after a few seconds of silence, he was going to say something, but he had to admit, it felt pretty nice to be held like this. it wasn’t often that he got any sort of physical comfort, or any comfort at all besides what finn would offer him. jake used to be the one responsible for that kind of thing…

finn’s smile faded as he heard fern sigh bitterly once more. maybe it hurt extra bad because they had some sort of twin-like emotional connection, but whatever the reason, fern being like this broke finn’s heart a little more than he would prefer. theres gotta be something that could help, right?

in his desperate mental search for solutions, suddenly a particularly interesting idea appeared in his head. but was that even still physically possible…?

he’d thought about the concept of fern being ticklish before, maybe once or twice. but usually just brushed it off, and promptly forgot about it. but being tickled used to cheer finn up all the time. what were the chances that it would work on fern as well? probably good chances!

it was an entertaining idea in theory, but how could he not have considered that maybe, if he still was, it could serve to be useful!

maybe he should try…

“hey fern, mind if i try something”

“hm? uh, yeah, sure.” he seemed to be zoning out again, absentmindedly going along with whatever finn said.

the teen tried to hold back his mischievous giggles as he squeezed ferns side. and to his surprise, he yelped and jerked away! now this just got 1000 times more interesting.

fern froze for a second, before looking back at finn in embarrassment.

“finn! what are you… don’t do that-”

finn couldn’t stop the giggles that poured out of him this time as he decided this plan was officially in action, making sure his arms were tightly wrapped around fern, effectively trapping him.

he gave fern no time to attempt an escape as he quickly started testing something, deciding to experimentally poke around his middle like he was studying a test subject.

fern choked out a sort of strangled noise, and quickly tried to bat finns hands away with his own. his attempts are pretty useless however, and once finn is satisfied with his discoveries, he wastes no time skittering his fingers against the smooth grass of fern’s tummy.

ferns willpower almost immediately breaks, letting himself burst into a fit of squeaky cackling.

although its panicked, his laugh is surprisingly bubbly. its quite the pleasant contrast from his usual tone of voice, and finn can’t help but quietly snicker along with him in amusement. when has he ever heard fern laugh like this? he isn’t sure he has!

his thoughts are cut off by fern rapidly starting to get squirmy and kicking frantically at the grass below them, digging up some dirt and weeds in the process.

“eheheheHEHE- NAHAHAHA!” he cried, quickly shaking his head back and fourth.

“aw, fern! i didn’t know you were so ticklish! i probably should’ve guessed, since i… uh, yeah. but this is honestly fun, heheh!”

“f- for yohou maybeheHEHE!! FIHIHIN!!!” he full on screamed as finn reached down to scribble at his knee on top of it all. so, seems they have the same tickle spots! that makes this a lot easier. finn cheekily noticed that he wasn’t exactly trying to get away, though.

“i dunno, it doesn’t really seem like you aren’t liking this… i bet you do!”

“nooohoho!”

“heh, you totally do man. buuut you know, thats not a bad thing! that means its helping you, right?” he momentarily let fern have a breather to think about this.

and yeah, as much as fern would like to deny it, he couldn’t ignore the warm feeling that fluttered in his chest. didn’t mean he had it in him to bring his voice up to anything louder than a mumble, though.

“hehe- uh… okay, maybe just a little.”

finn grinned at this, getting right back to work. “good! so, where does it tickle more? right there? orrr here?!”

“AH- eheHEhe wait wait, WAHAHAH PLEHEHESHE!! oh gLOB!!”

and wait he did not! fern tried not to make so many embarrassing flailing movements or squeaky noises, but honestly, when his body felt like it was melting into a tickly mush, he’s pretty sure his mind had short circuited and abandoned whatever remaining composure he once had long ago.

finn started digging his fingers into fern’s ribs (or where they would be) and giggled at how his shrieks raised an octave. he was almost smiling as much as fern at this point.

it was surprisingly gratifying watching how his brother went from visibly upset, to now laughing so hard his eyes started to prick with mirthful tears in a matter of minutes.

occasionally, finn even earned some snorts from fern (which he did not fail to tease him about) as he switched to erratically claw and poke along his sides and belly. once finn realized fern was particularly sensitive to the rougher methods, he definitely made sure to utilize that knowledge. fern never remembered being this good at tickling people when he was finn, whats the deal!

after a bit longer of this, all fern could do in his weakened state is kick about helplessly, and let out giggly pleas for finn to have mercy through his shrill shrieks and babbling. or, thats what it sounds like hes saying… sort of. its kinda hard to tell at this point.

he decided to let up after fern’s voice started getting a little too wheezy, releasing him from the chamber that was his arms.

fern immediately flopped onto the ground, curling into himself and softly giggling at the tickly feeling that lingered on him. he didn’t realize how heated his face felt until now… and also until finn scooted over to look at him, and as the cherry on top of the embarrassment cake, pointed it out.

“woah, your face is… wait! is that supposed to be blush, or something? your cheeks are covered in flowers dude! ehehe!”

fern only groaned in response, hiding his face in his hands... yet he couldn’t help the giddy smile that remained plastered on it. his body felt all light and warm, and in the back of his mind he realized this was the happiest he’s felt in a long while… or maybe even ever, as himself.

but finn’s voice cut through his train of thought before he could let himself get lost in it.

“err, you… doing okay? sorry if i went too far. i kinda tend to do that, i think. but i didn’t even know you could still be ticklish! that was probs the most i’ve ever heard you laugh, too!” fern stayed silent as he continued to gain back his energy. but finn didn’t mind.

he went to lay next to fern, probably to be able to at least read him a little better.

“…so, don’t you feel a little better? eeeeh?”

the grassy creature uncovered his face, briefly taking a moment to brush off the flowers (and a mushroom that had apparently sprouted atop his head at some point) before meeting finn’s expectant gaze. a beat of silence passed, then his eyes suddenly lit up as he appeared to come to a realization.

“huh, yeah! i actually do! …i guess i never really get to feel that carefree. i don’t think i’ve actually been able to since i was a finn… but that really distracted me from stuff, you know?” he rubbed his arm meekly, suddenly lowering his voice to almost a whisper as he picked away some stray grass blades that stuck out.

“and it was… uh, kinda fun. you know, kinda like we used to do with jake. so thanks.”

and he smiled. probably one of the most genuine smiles finns ever seen from him. of course, he returned it in full. fern’s emotions just seem to be pretty contagious that way.

finn figured he’d need to try this again, if fern ever seemed a little more gloomy than he finds acceptable. and honestly, fern wasn’t sure he’d mind that so much.

#adventure time tickles #adventure time tickling #ler!finn #lee!fern #sfw tickling #tickling #btw the “something more” bothering fern that finn couldn’t put his finger on #was basically everything that torments him in the series #so like… his whole existence #fern rlly deserves to be happy and thats Exactly Why he needs this #okay im smashing my phone and deleting myself off the face of the earth now BYE

[cockatrice-writers-guild]

Perception

this takes place in the space au

warnings: swearing, existential terror?, fear, vomiting

taglist: @autism-alley , @awkwardgtace , @tripodcat-gt

The morning comes slowly as it tends to on a Saturday but unfortunately it comes all the same. I slept, albeit not that much but still it’s something. I take some time to stare up at the ceiling while waiting for my headache to fade slightly before I clear my throat.

“Jax, honey, you there?”

There’s a small pause before I get my answer.

“Mmm?”

And I smile a little when I hear his voice.

“You seem a little out of it, big guy. Were you asleep?”

Another pause before

“Mmhmm.”

And now I can’t help but crack a small smile.

“I still don’t get how a cosmic entity even needs sleep,” I mutter as I stretch and get out of bed.

“…not much to do out here,” the man mumbles back.

“Mmm. I guess that’s fair.”

I hear a yawn in my head and can’t help but yawn too before moving to the window and pulling it open. The view is shit but that’s not what I’m looking for. Instead, I turn my gaze to the sky and raise a hand, waiting a moment before an invisible force slowly wraps around it.

“Hey,” I whisper.

“Hey,” he whispers back.

The barrier around my hand tightens just slightly before it dissipates and I go back inside.

“So, what are you planning on doing today, M? It’s…Saturday, right?”

I search the room and find some wearable clothes on the floor. “Yup.”

“So no janitor stuff today?”

“Nope.”

“But you’re still up early.”

“I couldn’t sleep well again. And anyway, I got a commission I need to get working on.”

“Artist stuff?”

“Artist stuff.” I pull a shirt over my head before I continue. “Today’s special though.”

“How so?”

“The customer wanted a custom piece. Big. Bigger than my usual stuff anyway, so I’ll need to get some more wood today. And I’ll be out in the open so you’ll get to see me work.”

“Really?”

The excitement in his voice makes me laugh.

-

I look at the drawing in my sketchbook again before making a few more marks on the block of wood sitting on the stump in front of me. Client wanted a great horned owl statue for his front yard. And as soon as I get this out of the way, I’ll be able to pay rent so it has to be perfect.

I can feel a familiar chill crawl up my spine as an inconceivably huge set of eyes focuses on my work but do my best to ignore it.

“…so what I’m doing right now is marking the wood so I can start carving. It helps with accuracy,” I call out over my shoulder.

“Ahhh, ok.”

And now I feel my shoulders start to relax again.

I add a few more details to the drawing of the owl before doing my best to replicate them on the wood. The eyes need to be just right for this to work. They need to be wide and full of life, giving the dead wood the impression of something breathing. This statue isn’t going to be painted so the carving needs to speak for itself, each individual scratch left behind adding to the illusion I’m trying to create. The eyes need to be well defined without being too distracting. Maybe messing with the lacquer will help to get the effect I’m going for, adding just a touch of darkness to the wood and giving them the depth they need. The eyes, the eyes, the eyes…

Eyes on me

My hand hesitates over the wood, the tip of my pencil resting over the eye of the owl, graphite just starting to graze the wood. Jax has been relatively quiet this whole time, perfectly content with watching me for as long as he can see me unobstructed by the treetops and roofs of buildings. It’s almost absurd to think about and as I finally snap myself out of that train of thought and try to get back to my work, I can’t resist finally calling out to him again.

“…hey, Jax?”

“Yeah, M?”

“I…sorry, you probably get asked this question all the time but…”

“Yeah?”

“…what’s it like?”

“…what do you mean?”

“…what’s it like being you?”

“Lonely. …at least, before I met you, Mia.”

The words are warm and even though I can feel a smile tugging at my lips, distant warning sirens start to go off in my head as something starts to feel off. The words are warm but if I didn’t know any better, I’d almost say that…

“…Jax?”

“Mia?”

“Are you…doing something?”

“What do you…oh.”

“Oh?”

“I…sorry I was...,” an awkward cough rings out in my head before his voice drops to a borderline whisper, “…uh, hugging the planet. I…sorry, did you feel that?”

My heart rate picks up slightly as I look up to face the cloudless sky, forcing my grip on my pencil to loosen before it snaps. “I…yeah, I…uh…the temperature…rose a little.”

“…oh. …sorry about that.”

There’s silence for a moment as I try to wrap my head around what just happened before I try to speak again.

“I…the planet in your hands, being cosmic, being you. What’s that like?”

“Well, it’s kinda…mmm…I’m…not really sure how to explain it to be honest.”

“I guess that’s fair.”

“…yeah,” Jax replies distantly.

I wait for him to continue but as the silence stretches on and on, I just go back to trying to bring out the eyes of the owl. I get lost in my work for a while, trying to angle the eyes just right to give the statue just the tiniest hint of movement, scratching at the wood with the graphite until finally something I’m happy with starts to take shape. I take a step back and examine my work, hands itching for my carving knife when Jax finally speaks again.

“…why don’t I just show you?”

“Show me wha-”

I’m in space. I’m in fucking space. Millions of stars and void and distant galaxies surround me and I’m floating on nothing. It’s all so strangely beautiful. But

It's all so empty.

Endless cosmos swirling all around me in an overwhelming explosion of colours and lights and yet it’s completely silent, not another living thing as far as I can see. I’m completely…

Alone.

I find myself looking down and now I’m even more confused. My arms are…not my own. Thick with fat and pale. The large swell of a stomach below them. I’m wearing what seems to be some kind of flowing cropped shirt and a long skirt to go with it. My hands are currently cupped in front of me, held close to my face. And in those hands are-

My breath catches in my throat.

Is…that…it…it can’t be but..

The Earth. The Earth, the blue green planet cupped almost tenderly in my massive hands. It’s the size of a marble to me. The whole world. My heart jumps when I watch it rolls slightly as I adjust my hands, moving the multi-coloured pebble that is my planet into one of my palms. I watch as it rolls into the dip of my palm and stays there. I…my goddamn thumbnail is bigger than it.

“This is me,” I hear a voice say quietly. A man’s voice. Jax. So…this is…

“And,” my now free hand comes forward, absolutely engulfing the Earth in a massive shadow before I use my fingers to readjust the little planet, feeling a scream catch in my throat when my oversized digits make contact with the thing. But the fingers stop just short of the billions of fragile lives on the surface of the tiny rock, protected only by what seems to be a thin barrier. I want to stop, to pull my hand away but still it continues against my wishes. I watch helplessly as a single claw comes forward. Reaches out and finally touches down on a small piece of green. The claw stops just short of impaling the continent, instead tapping lightly on the miniscule barrier. “That’s you,” the voice finishes quietly.

And now I’m in the park again, block of wood in front of me, grass beneath my feet.

I look around wildly, breathing so hard I almost choke on the intake. I look up at the sky and can almost imagine the dull thud of the massive claw touching the barrier, can see the image playing over and over and over in my head. I feel nauseous. I feel…I feel…I’m drenched in sweat. I can’t…my head hurts…I…oh God, what did I…I…Jax…is…he has…

I can still see the whole planet rolling slightly in my palms as I shift slightly.

As he shifts slightly.

I…oh God I…he…I…bile rises in my throat.

“Mia!” a voice exclaims in my head as I lean over and puke into the grass. I’m trembling bad. I swipe at my mouth with the back of my hand before I slowly lower myself to the ground, wrapping my arms around my trembling legs and burying my head in my knees. My breaths are fast and shaky and my vision blurs with tears. My head is pounding and pounding and pounding in time with my heart and I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t I-

“…Mia?”

And now I flinch.

The man I’ve been talking to all this time. Sometimes I forget he…

“…Mia? …are you-”

“Give me a moment,” I force out between breaths, the words coming out much harsher than I intended, something close to a growl carrying them as tears start to spill from my eyes.

“…alright,” comes Jax’s quiet reply after a moment.

And in the dead silence that follows, I try to focus on my breathing. I try to focus on calming my thoughts. I try to focus on anything but what just happened but it’s not working.

I breathe. I breathe. I breathe I breatheIbreatheI-

“Jax.”

There’s a pause.

“…yeah, M?”

“What the hell are you even doing?”

Dead silence.

“…what?”

“I…I’m not even a fucking speck to you. I’m nothing. I’m less that nothing. But you still talk to me. I just…what the hell are you doing?”

“I’m…talking to my friend,” he whispers.

Friend. Friend. A piece of dust on a tiny rock he carries around is his friend.

The image of the world rolling around in his hands like a fucking children’s toy flashes in my mind and I feel bile rising again, hugging my knees tighter and tighter and tighter until finally

“How…I don’t…how could…HOW COULD I POSSIBLY BE YOUR FRIEND?”

“…Mia, I-“

“DON’T. DON’T YOU DARE CALL ME THAT, RIGHT NOW. I- HOW COULD I POSSIBLY BE ANYTHING TO YOU? I…WHY ARE YOU…WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING? WHY ANY OF THIS? WHY SAVE US? WHY TALK TO ME? WHY? I…I DON’T…I DON’T UNDERSTAND.“

“…I…I saw an inhabited planet that was dying and I wanted to help.” Jax sounds close to tears now and I can feel my head spinning. The world isn’t even in orbit. It’s in the hands of a fucking giant. “I talk to you because you let me and I-“ a sob racks through him, “I thought we were okay. I thought you were okay with me being here but I…I’m sorry, alright? I’m sorry about my size and-,” another sob, “and that I keep scaring you and that this is the only way to keep your planet safe and…and for showing you what it’s like out here and for talking to you and for that time I stopped you from getting a drink at the vending machine and when I-“

Wait.

Jax goes on and on and on in my head, wailing about hanging out with me and the fake sky he projects onto the Earth and annoying me and whatever the hell else he can think about in his panic but as he continues, my fear clogged brain chooses to latch onto one of his confessions in particular and latch on hard.

The vending machine. The vending machine. He did that on purpose. When the stupid little hatch was stuck for a long ass time before it finally gave way and let me get my drink. And Jax acted dumb when I asked if it was him.

But it was him.

And it’s strange but…the mundanity of it all almost helps to calm me some. The giant man big enough to hold the world used his powers to play a harmless prank on me and then lie about it. To my face. And he remembered it too, remembered it so well that he felt the need to apologize about it now. That’s just…that’s…I focus on that for now, the incident playing in my head over and over as very very gradually, my breathing starts to slow until finally it reaches something just short of normal.

And as my head starts to clear and I blink the tears out of my eyes, I focus on my breaths and the grass under my palms as I slowly allow myself to unfurl.

Take a few more breaths as I listen as Jax’s words, a pang of guilt building in my chest as he heaves again.

…

Jax.

…I know him.

I…know him.

I take a long breathe in, hold it and then slowly let it out.

“…Jax.”

“-being a monster and-“

“Jax.”

“-I keep asking you all these questions and-“

“JAX. SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONE SECOND.”

Surprisingly, the man stops in an instant, the only sound in my head the occasional heave between sobs.

“Jax.”

There’s no response at first.

“Honey.”

No response.

“Dude.”

No response.

“Asshole.”

There’s a watery chuckle.

My heart pounds so loud I can hear it in my ears but still I try to make my voice playful. “I thought you said that vending machine thing wasn’t your fault, big guy.”

Dead silence and despite it all I can’t help but smile.

“Care to explain?”

More silence.

And then

“…uh…” It’s nothing short of a murmur but still, it’s something.

“Yeah?”

“…I just…I thought…uh…”

“You thought it would be funny to use your barriers to fuck with me.”

“…yeah.”

“Dick.”

“Oh.”

“Asshole.”

“Oh.”

“I want sincerity next time.”

“…oh?”

“The next time you fuck with me, I want you to own it, alright?”

There’s a lengthy pause on his end before

“…but Mia, I-“

“Alright?”

“…why are you doing this?”

And now he just sounds confused.

“…you’re my friend, Jax. I don’t want to lose you.”

“I…I don’t want to lose you either.”

I nod up at the sky, shooting him a small smile at the sentiment before turning to the ground again to steady myself. Jax is silent but I can still feel his gaze on me and I wait for the shake to leave me before I finally look up at the sky again.

“Then you’re not losing me.”

Jax doesn’t say anything but I hear a slight exhale pass through my head like a small chuckle.

“…Jax, you’re not going to scare me away but for the love of God please do not do that again. …or at least warn me first.”

“I…yeah. …I’m sorry, Mia.”

I sigh. “I’m sorry too. It wasn’t fair of me to lash out like that. You’re good. You’re kind. You’re…kind of a dick apparently but it wasn’t fair of me to say all that stuff about you.”

“…thank you, Mia. Seriously, thank you. …but…are you really sure you want to keep doing this?”

“I keep my word. And I don’t hate being around you so that’s a plus.”

“Hey.”

I smile up at him before I start walking around, trying to get the jitters out of my system before I can finally bring myself to continue my work. Neither of us say anything but as the tension dissipates, the silence is almost comfortable. Something eventually occurs to me though.

The world in his hands, the pad of his thumb bigger than it. His arms. Stomach. Legs. I think I could make out a bit of his hair too.

“Jax?”

“Mia?”

“What do you look like?”

“…I’m not really sure. I’ve…only ever seen what you have, to be honest. …why do you ask?”

“You look like a human.”

There’s a pause on his end.

“…I guess I do.”

“Why do you look like a human?”

“I…don’t know.”

“You could be a human, you know? Like…I don’t know, maybe you got blown up to this size and sent back in time for this exact purpose.”

“…or maybe it’s just a coincidence.”

“Eh, maybe.”

There’s silence for a moment before I speak again. “I…guess it doesn’t matter either way. You’re here now and that’s all that matters.”

“…yeah.” And I can hear the small smile in his voice, imagining it for a long moment before I just sigh.

“…still, I wish there was a way to see what you look like.”

Jax is silent for a long time and I can’t help but raise a brow.

“What’s up?”

“…huh?”

“You got quiet again. What are you thinking about?”

“…I mean…”

“Yeah?”

“The sun is fake, Mia.”

My eyes widen slightly as what he’s insinuating starts to dawn on me. “…the sky is an illusion.”

“Yeah.”

“…so technically, you could-“

“…yeah.”

“But dropping the illusion probably isn’t the best idea unless you want mass hysteria.”

“Mmhmm.”

I try to think about it for a second. “…is there…maybe a way you could drop the illusion for…just me?”

“What do you mean?”

“Everyone else sees sky. I see…outside.”

Jax is quiet for a moment.

“…can you do that?”

“…I’m not sure that’s the best idea, M. I mean you literally just-“

“I know I know but…I want to see who I’m talking to.”

Jax is quiet.

“And I think maybe you’d like to be seen too.”

“…hmm.”

“Hmm?”

“I…I don’t know, M. The thought of me scares you.”

“You were gentle.”

“…what?”

“The way you hold the Earth, like you’re…I don’t know, cradling it? It was terrifying, sure, but…I don’t know, it was gentle. You’re gentle. And you care so so much about beings so much smaller than you it’s unreal. You’re scary, yeah but…I’d like to think that I know you. And…that’s the man I want to see. Not some massive incomprehensible cosmic entity. I just want to see my giant best friend.”

“…oh.”

“Don’t fucking oh me after all that!”

“Sorry I,” he laughs, “I just…wow. I...I don’t know what to say. I…thank you? I guess? I…holy shit, Mia.”

I try to wave him off. “Yeah, yeah.”

“…thank you,” he whispers.

I try to fight the smile off my face. “Yeah okay, I get it. So do you wanna do this?”

“Anything for my best friend,” the man all but purrs.

“…actually, I think I just hate you.”

The man laughs and I frown up at the sky.

“So, can you do it?”

“I can definitely try.”

I nod. “Go ahead then.”

I hear Jax take a deep breath. “…okay.”

I take a breath in kind and hold it, squeezing my hands as I brace myself for whatever’s about to happen.

I expect the change to be huge. Monumental. But one blink is all it takes for the sky to completely disappear. No flashy lights. No deafening noises. Just a quick flash and everything changes.

And now

Now the sky is something else entirely, the bright blue replaced by an endless black void lined at the corners of my vision with grey.

I stare up at it, frozen as my brain tries to catch up with what just happened when all at once, the view starts changing rapidly. The black shrinks and becomes something hauntingly familiar. An eye, then two, a nose, a mouth and finally

I’m staring up at the face of a man, his arm outstretched and disappearing under the horizon. His mouth is a thin line and his eyes are filled with concern, brows furrowed as he takes me in. The face of a total stranger but one that is undeniably human.

Jax.

The sight is almost impossible to comprehend, a man in the sky staring back at me. All around him I can see the deep purples and blues and blacks of cosmos I’ve only ever seen in desktop wallpapers. Jax is up there. He’s actually holding the planet. He’s actually real.

He doesn’t speak as we silently take each other in and I try to absorb every single detail of him that I can even as I feel my nails start digging into my skin. My muscles are so tightly coiled now that when a bug suddenly lands on me, it sends my arm flying and the consequences of this are immediate as the sky seemingly reacts to the movement, turning from the giant man floating in space to a multitude of blurry colours that dance across the horizon.

This stops just as quickly as it starts and now the giant’s expression is vaguely sheepish.

“Sorry,” I hear Jax’s voice whisper in my head though the man’s mouth doesn’t move with the words.

It takes me a few moments too long to find my voice again. “You…Jax, what the fuck just happened?”

The man looks away, his lips pursed. “Well…you moved so suddenly that I…well…”

“…that you jumped?”

There’s a pause before he gives a small nod.

“Jax?”

“Mia?”

“Are you…scared of me?”

“I…well…I’ve never had anyone actually look at me, you know? This is…new.”

“I…guess it is.”

Jax barely moves as I take him in and when he jerks away slightly when I move too fast trying to take the crick out of my neck from staring up at the sky for so long, I realize I should probably do something to help ease the tension.

My heart hammers in my chest but as I stare up at the sky, soaking in the features of the man I’ve been talking to for months, an idea comes to me.

“…Jax?”

“…Mia?”

“You…said you don’t know what you look like, right?”

“I…yeah. Why?”

I stare up at him for a long moment before I slowly make myself stand on trembling legs and take a few steps to retrieve my sketchpad from where I dropped it during my…fit of terror. And it’s almost funny but as I move, Jax keeps his eyes glued on me as if he’s scared I’m going to attack him. It’s a completely absurd notion but as I hug my sketchpad to my chest like a shield, the thought of something like him being scared of something like me is so ridiculous that a laugh escapes me before I can stop it and the sudden noise causes Jax to start again.

I give him an apologetic look before taking a seat in the grass, turning to an empty page and holding the tip of my pencil to the paper, watching the light trail it leaves behind grow as I try to stop my own hands from shaking. I erase the scribble and try again, erasing and pressing the pencil to the paper over and over until finally it settles enough to stay.

I take a deep deep breath, try to get lost in the promise of a blank canvas before finally, finally raising my eyes to meet Jax’s again. His eyes widen slightly and I can see the way his shoulders tense almost in synch with mine but I hold his gaze in the endless silence and he does the same.

I squeeze my pencil, swallowing before I finally bring myself to speak again.

“You,” the words start off slow but I push on. “Your hair is…it’s long and…flowing.” In the void of space, the man’s hair floats all around him, giving the effect that he’s deep underwater. “It’s blond…that’s yellow, by the way.”

Jax cocks his head slightly at my words, listening in silence for a while before his free hand reaches up to grab a few free floating strands and hold them to his face. He breaks eye contact for only a second to look at his hair. “Blond…,” I hear him whisper in my head and I slowly nod, my hands moving almost automatically to try and capture the sight on paper.

“Your eyes are…grey. They…they remind me of storm clouds right before the rain.”

Jax just nods, waiting for me to finish a rough sketch of his face before I continue.

“Your skin is white.”

Jax looks at his skin quizzically. “This is white?”

I sketch out the wide berth of his shoulders and clean up the shape of his head. “In regular colours, no, but when referring to skin colour, yeah actually.”

“Hmm.”

“…I…can’t see much of you now but when you…fucking, I don’t know, projected yourself into my head or whatever, I could see that you were fat.” I try to sketch out an approximation of his body from memory. “I can’t see much of your clothes now either but they were a really nice mix of orange and purple.” And I try to make it flow as much as it did in my head. “A shirt and a skirt, I think. And, man, they really suited you.”

“…thanks, M.”

I just nod in response and take more time to clean up the sketch in silence while Jax watches me work. And once I’m happy with the sketch, I reach up and grab some pencil crayons to get started on the rest, the familiar scratching of wax on paper helping to sooth me some in the silence. Jax eventually starts humming a small tune he heard somewhere to pass the time and I can’t help but smile a little.

The clothes more or less finished, I’m about to start on his skin when I pause, the wax of the pencil hanging uncertainly over the drawing’s face.

I stare at the expression on the paper for a long moment. It’s scared. Wide eyed. Uncertain. Everything it was when I first saw him. But that’s not how I want to portray him here.

I look back up to the sky and the song in my head immediately pauses as Jax takes me in again, his brows starting to crease as he watches me.

I tap my pencil on the paper as I think. “Hmm…”

“Hmm?”

“Your expression.”

“…what about it?”

“…you…,” I think about it for a second. “Your eyes are wide. And...your mouth is a fine line. Your eyebrows are creased with worry and I can tell by the tension in your shoulders that you want nothing more than to drop visibility and go back into hiding.”

Jax’s face falls slightly. “…that’s-”

“But,” I interrupt him. “You’re still here. You’re trying for my sake and I appreciate that more than anything else.”

“…oh.”

The word is almost whispered and now I watch as Jax’s expression changes into something softer, his mouth hesitantly twisting into a small smile and his eyes finally leaving mine as he focuses on a spot off to the right, his brows raising slightly as he thinks about my words.

I enjoy the scene for as long as I dare before my hands scramble for my pencil again and I roughly sketch out the expression, changing the angle of his face slightly to match the one in the sky before I work on bringing it to life. The rapid movement catches Jax’s attention and his eyes eventually return to watch me work again, though a small smile still touches his lips.

Time passes almost peacefully as I clean up the man’s expression and add the small reflection of the Earth that shines faintly in his eyes. It’s terrifying if I think about it for too long but as Jax eventually picks up his song from where he left off and I melt into my work, I find I can’t really bring myself to care.

What I’m drawing is my friend. Nothing more, nothing less.

And so finally, after a dozen or so finishing touches and once the ache in my back from leaning over the page gets too much to ignore, I finally put down my tools with a sigh and examine my work.

…it would do.

“…Jax?”

“Yeah, M?”

My eyes run over the drawing a few more times to check for errors before I stand and look up at the man in question. “Do you want to see what you look like?”

Jax’s eyes widen at that, his gaze traveling down to the sketchbook in my hands for a second before he meets my eyes again. “…you drew me?”

“I-what did you think I was drawing?”

Jax just shrugs at me helplessly and I can’t help but laugh at the sheer bewilderment on his face.

“…you ready to see what you look like, big guy?”

He stares at me for a long moment before finally giving me the smallest of nods.

I nod back and, after giving him a few more seconds to get ready, turn the sketchbook and hold it out to him.

And for a long, long time, Jax just stares at the page, his expression unreadable. But slowly, he starts to move again, moving his free hand up to run his fingers along the outline of his nose or the shape of his eyebrow or the dip of his chin. The process is slow going as Jax slowly matches what he can feel with my drawing of him. And even though after he takes so long I eventually have to sit down again, propping the sketchbook open on the block I was carving before I do so I don’t interrupt him, I can’t help but enjoy the moment. The ways his eyes sparkle, irises twitching to absorb every single detail of the piece, his brows furrowed with intensity and his mouth pursed in concentration as he takes himself in.

And finally, his gaze turns back to me and the full weight of the happiness on his face is almost enough to completely overwhelm me.

“That’s me,” he whispers and the absolute giddiness in his voice brings a small smile to my face.

“Yeah, it is.”

“I...thank you, Mia! I…I can’t-…I don’t-”

Jax fumbles with his words for a moment before he stops trying to talk and instead I feel invisible walls close around me on all sides as he uses his barriers to momentarily trap me in a weird hug of sorts.

“…thank you,” he finally whispers again and I smile.

#this took A While to write #writeblr #original writing #original story #Jax and Mia #space au #ocs #the rooster crows #thanks for reading!

[inkdragonworks]

After waiting a few days, I wanted to announce I’ve deleted Twitter off my phone.

Which is still a lame announcement. I was debating deleting my account entirely but there’s enough people I mentioned it to that would be upset about it being gone, that I’d feel like it’d be better to keep it around. I doubt Twitter will ever switch hands, or the person forced to run it will care about the user experience over their own, so I guess I’ll only ever go on to dump links that go back to here.

It’s not entirely related to the current owner though. I’ve had problems with twitter for a long time, but accepted being on there due to needing something to distract myself, and that it had the largest audience.

lately, as in within the past few years, I’ve cared less and less about audiences, and accepting that me and the stuff I care about are probably going to stay relatively obscure. My output is too slow; even if I managed to make something that had a freak accident amount of recognition, I couldn’t capitalize on that momentum. It’s just not who I am or what I want to make.

Maybe if I win the lottery and could pay people to help, then sure. Crowdfunding isn’t a realistic avenue (too much time to create, not enough interest to justify it, amount of money required for it to be a livable wage is too expensive, burden of deadline, risk of life circumstances getting in the way, etc). The money I’m making and saving now, it’s for my family and livelihood, it’s not gonna be for a passion project.

I’ve thought about all that for years. I’m fine taking a year to make a chapter at this point. I’m fine with the idea of dying before completing it. I’m fine with it getting a modest release and being moved on from after a week, like the majority of things released. I’m happy working on it for its own sake.

the kind of person I’d have to be to change that isn’t something I’d like. I don’t care about being a brand, or supporting a brand, or someone’s shitty brand image. That’s the other aspect of twitter that I’m just not into and the whole trap of chasing an audience. “Outreach” “market viability” “viewer retention” “content output” “engagement” “hype culture”. It’s concepts that turn things from works of art into products, and even if that isn’t someone’s goal, platforms like twitter perpetuate that perspective. It’s not real, but it’s a pretty addictive mindset cause it keeps giving you feedback to encourage it. Likes, retweets, follows, views, comments. You look at one post you made before to now and feel a sense of progress. You look at the post you made and one someone else did, and you think that’s a goal. But its not a goal towards cultivating self expression and fulfillment. It’s a goal towards chasing a high.

Usually reality is pretty boring, and I’m good at being boring, so that’s where I’d like to be now. I’m sorry that I have this tendency to ramble about these things, but that’s where my care lies. I think about existential stuff a lot. As for tumblr it’s pretty dead and I don’t really browse it much. I feel like having some place to share my stuff publicly, so this is what I’m doing for now.

[decadentjellojaloppy29]

You talk too much

Secondo has had a frustrating day at the monastery, between his brothers antics and the endless meetings he was about to snap, that is until he remembers you’ve been assigned to help him for the week. Which is the solution to his stress.

This took forever, enjoy.

Warnings: Language? Suggestive content doesn’t even begin to cover it. A very touch starved and needy Secondo. Fairly soft Secondo except for that one part. Primo being an annoying older brother.

🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️

Secondo rubbed his temples as he walked down the monastery foyer. He had absolutely had it with today. Copia constantly asking questions and Terzo being a nuisance at the papal meeting, along with the new siblings of sin causing him to get a migraine with their constant oohing and ahhing at every little thing. His shoes practically stomped their way to his office, he swung around the corner and slammed the door behind him.

Secondo sighed sliding down the door slightly.

“Ciao Papa.” You greeted closing the closet door.

Secondo sort of forgot you’d been assigned to him for the week, one of his eyes opening to look at you. His gaze slightly softened. 

“Ciao sorella. Excuse my foul mood, I’ve had a hard day.” 

He apologized taking off his papal robe and hanging it on a hook. 

You were about to tell him it was alright till another voice got to it before you did

“As if this foul mood isn’t different from your usual one.” Primo gave a hoarse laugh from a seat in the corner. 

Secondo’s brows knit together as he looked over to his older brother. He exhaled harshly through his nose and looked back over to you.

You shrugged not really knowing what to say. 

“I couldn’t get him to leave?” You offered, face slightly cringing.

“She begged me to stay.” Primo corrected, smug look on his face. 

Secondo’s jaw clenched in frustration. If he was in a bad way before it was TERRIBLE now.

“Sorry papa he offered conversation and I was bored.” You told Secondo who was now slumped in his chair behind his desk. 

Primo leaned his face into the palm of his hand looking you up at down, much to the annoyance of Secondo. 

“What can I say, mia stellina, I’m a good conversationalist, no?” Primo said grinning.

Secondo rolled his eyes at the pet name wanting Primo to get the idea to leave without him actually having to say it. 

You couldn’t help the grin that formed on your face at Primo’s antics. 

“Why are you here?” Secondo finally asks a small growl escaping him. 

Primo shrugged getting up from his seat. 

“I saw that your little intern was bored and I took it upon myself to fix that. How could I not?” Primo shrugged his index finger lightly grazing your chin as he walks past you. 

At this point Secondo had just about had it with the antics of his older brother, he sank into his chair practically grinding his teeth. 

“I think I got it from here Papa P. But you have been good company that I can’t deny.” You tell him kicking a chair to the side to show him to the door. 

Primo leaves saying something about his garden which seems to annoy Secondo even further. 

The door shuts and it’s just the two of you again. Secondo sighs in relief. His eyes travel toward you again. Now that all distractions are out of the way he allows himself to get distracted by you. The way you move around the room, how your habit hugs your curves, the bits of eye contact you’ll make when you catch him looking. 

If it were up to him he’d stare at you all day. He turned his chair toward you, getting your attention. 

“Your dedication to work is admirable but the company you keep…less so.” He admitted referring to his older brother.

“I know I know, but how was I supposed to turn him down?” You asked with a shrug.

“It’s easy. Just say go away.” 

You looked at him wondering if he was serious.

“It works for me.” He shrugs. 

You shook your head and smiled at him, he smiled back the two of you soaking in the moment for a second. The soft afternoon light shining through the frosted window made you look almost angelic.

Secondo suddenly cleared his throat, looking down at the stack of papers under his arms. The room held a lot of tension but neither of you wanted to admit it. It was no secret Secondo knew how to sweet talk the best of them, but when it came to you he felt like it was some sort of forbidden fruit. Which only made him want it more. 

From the first time the two of you had met he took an interest in you, sometimes that interest was innocent most times it wasn’t. He was fascinated by you. It was the way you acted, the sound of your laugh, your eyes, your hands, your hips- 

Secondo shook himself out of his thoughts. 

The two of you were finally alone as he wanted, but he was stuck in his place behind the desk.

“Whatcha thinking about?” You quirked a brow at him. 

“Hm?” He almost flinches looking up at you from his desk.

“Must be a pretty good daydream. You didn’t make a sound for a good 5 minutes.” You grinned at him, maybe pushing your luck a little. 

Secondo sifted through his options mentally, he could just tell you how bad he wanted you. He could be unapologetically honest, in the the privacy of his own office. 

On the other hand he didn’t wanna scare you off. Before he could bite his tongue he spoke, his mouth moving faster than his mind could. 

“You like me, sorella?” He decided to be bold and ask. 

The question caught you off guard. You slowly turned to look at him. 

“I’m sorry?” You ask. 

“You heard correctly.” Secondo quickly responds trying to have as much control over  the situation as possible. 

“I…guess it’d depend on the specification. In what way do you mean?” You tread lightly, your throat suddenly dry. 

“That’s entirely up to you dolcezza.” 

Secondo’s voice is low. As intimidating as he may look behind the desk, his heart is thrashing against his rib cage. 

“Should I take your asking as an implication that I’ve, aroused an interest in you.” The words double meaning was not lost on you. 

The two of you were being particularly methodical, neither one wanting to just come out and say it. It was almost like you were verbally fencing.

But Secondo was tired of holding back. 

“I suppose you could say that, seeing as the thing I was thinking about just moments ago was how you’d look bent over this desk. My desk.”

He finally said, sweeping the back of his hand on said desk as if wiping dust from it. 

The footing you’d just gained in this game was now lost because of the blatantness of his statement. 

Secondo swallowed hard, hoping he didn’t cross a line, but the look of intensity never leaving his eyes. 

“Oh.” Was the only thing you could think to say. 

‘Gotcha.’ Secondo thought, a wicked smirk appearing on his face. 

His gloved finger curled, a kittenish look on his face as he beckoned you closer. Your footsteps were cautious as you made your way over, planting yourself right between his legs. 

“Kneel for papa, cara.” He practically growled. You weren’t normally this compliant but the circumstances were…different. You got to your knees finally being at eye level with him. The back of his hand stroked your jaw gently before grabbing it. Bringing your face closer to his he whispered. 

“This is something you want, yes?” 

All you could manage was a nod. 

Secondo laughs a deep gravely laugh causing shivers down your spine. 

“No clever comments to share, eh? You’re normally so quick witted.” He teased, reveling in how much control he had in the moment. 

You shift uncomfortably trying to avoid his burning gaze. The heat in your face becoming undeniable. Your feelings confused as much as they were elated. You knew you had a smart mouth but when it came to Secondo you didn’t expect pushing your luck to end like this.

Secondo brings his face closer. His nose slightly brushing against yours. You couldn’t help letting your eyes fall shut. You could feel his breath on your parted lips. But you couldn’t let him get his way that easy.

“I’m not the one stalling. Something tells me your a little more scared than you let on.” You finally state, finding a place to verbally jab back. 

“Ahhh finally decided to speak up have you? I thought it might have become too much for you to handle, piccolina.” He shoots, the grip on your jaw tightening. 

You shift in his grip, not wanting to pull away but not exactly wanting to stay put either. Your heart raced and your knees ached. 

“You’re all talk.” You said, maybe getting yourself into more trouble than you bargained for. 

Secondo pulled your face toward his in a numbing kiss. His teeth bit and sucked at your lower lip. His large hands roaming over the curves of your body. Picking you up to sit in his lap, his mouth roamed every inch of your skin he could reach. You braced yourself, grabbing the end of his desk with your hands as his weight pushed your back into it. Squeezing your supple curves and pulling on your habit, Secondo could barley help himself. You start to lick and bite at his neck causing him to groan under you, the pressure in his pants becoming annoying.

“Tease.” He pants between kisses. 

“Stalling…” you sang slightly, seeing how far you could take it. 

Secondo chuckled darkly as he unbuttoned his black shirt, you followed by lifting the habit up and over your head. The two pieces of clothing dropping to the floor.

Secondo looked down at your chest, practically salivating. He almost didn’t know what to do with himself, overwhelmed by options. Finally deciding he leaned down covering you in love bites and hickeys. His teeth grazing your skin, biting down harder in some places than others causing a yelp out of you and a chuckle out of him. Your breasts and neck were now littered in dark marks. His mouth and hands were hot and needy much like your own. Both of you grabbing at whatever you could, trying to pull one another impossibly closer. Your nails dragging down his back.

It was getting increasingly hot in his stuffy office. The two of you were so unbelievably caught up in each other, enveloped in the heat of the moment.

“Oh dolcezza, cara mia, you’re so soft, so sweet. So intoxicating.” Secondo praised, not caring who could hear. His mind fuzzy with pleasure. “You get talkative when you’re needy, huh?” You teased, biting your bottom lip.

“You like to run your mouth so much piccolina?” Secondo grabbed your chin pulling you closer, “How bout I turn your smart ass around and make you scream instead?” That shut you up, your words caught in your throat, your face burning in return. Secondo smirked, his teeth glinting in the soft light. Your head started to spin, it was the praise, the whispered promises the unrelenting teasing, heat of the fucking office. You couldn’t tell left from right, his tongue exploring your mouth his hands gripping at your hips pushing you down onto him. His hips grinding up.

Everything was screeched to a halt when a knock at the door could be heard. You and Secondo panting and sweating violently as you looked toward the door. Secondo leaned back in his seat with a growl. ”Go. Away.” His deep voice rang through the room. A few seconds passed by where the two of you awaited some kind of response. And you got one. On the other side of the door Primo could be heard muttering something as he left. “See that wasn’t so hard.” Secondo said turning back to face you. You grinned and punched his arm, shaking your head.

#ghost band #ghost x reader #secondo x reader #ghost fanfiction #papa emeritus x reader

[archiveikemen]

‘Raising A Child With Love’ Story Event — Premium END [Yoritomo Route]

I do not own any of the Ikemen Series content being uploaded on this blog, everything belongs to CYBIRD. Please support them by downloading and playing their games.

read this before interacting with my posts

Maid: Forgive me, My Lady.

Yuno: What’s the matter?

Her expression clouded when I asked.

Maid: … The young lord is running a fever…

(What…?)

At the same time, in another place ——

Yoritomo was looking through some documents at the residence he and Kagetoki were staying at.

Kagetoki: You’re working at a faster speed than usual.

Kagetoki said when he noticed something unusual about Yoritomo’s behavior.

Yoritomo: Is that so? That just means I’m as efficient as ever.

Kagetoki: It makes me smile to know that you want to return to your wife and the young lord as soon as possible.

Yoritomo looked up from the documents.

Yoritomo: Smile? You said that with a straight face.

Kagetoki: … I didn’t expect you to be so devoted to your child.

Yoritomo: Who has time for that?

Yoritomo: I won’t sacrifice anything for my child’s sake. I’m not in a position to do that.

Yoritomo: But, well, I guess I care more about him that I expected myself to.

Yoritomo’s facial expression softened.

There was an unspoken love for Rindoumaru he couldn’t express.

Just then, a vassal suddenly came into the room.

Vassal: Lord Yoritomo, it’s the young lord…!

Yoritomo: … What did you just say?

(… His fever isn’t subsiding.)

I measured Rindoumaru’s temperature with my palm and continuously wiped off his sweat.

Nanny: My sincerest apologies, My Lady. He was under my care and yet…

Yuno: It’s not your fault. Thank you for letting me know so quickly.

I smiled at the nanny who was lowering her head in apology, but her facial expression remained tense.

Nanny: Please get some rest, My Lady. You’re not feeling well yourself, and yet you’ve been nursing the young lord for hours…

Nanny: At this rate, you might collapse!

The nanny was tearful as she pleaded with me.

Yuno: I’m fine. I’m a physician, so I’m used to caring for the sick.

I gave her a small smile to calm her down.

Yuno: Moreover… I’m his mother.

(To be honest, my body feels heavy and my head is spinning.)

(But… I don’t want to leave my son’s side.)

Yuno: This is something I can at least do for him… nothing makes me happier than this.

Nanny: My Lady…

I looked back at Rindoumaru, who seemed to be in pain.

(Don’t worry, Rindoumaru. You’ll recover soon. Mama will go through this together with you…!)

I told the nanny to step down as I took over Rindoumaru’s care…

When night fell, I woke up to the sound of Rindoumaru’s voice.

(Oh no, I fell asleep.)

I immediately looked around for Rindoumaru, but I saw someone unexpected.

Yuno: ! … Lord Yoritomo?

Yoritomo: You’re awake?

In Yoritomo’s arms, Rindoumaru was staring at me.

Yuno: I thought you said you were on a work trip… and will only be back tomorrow…

Yoritomo: I rushed to finish my work as soon as I heard the news and hurriedly made my way here… I’m sorry I’m late.

(He really came all the way back…)

The gesture made me so happy that I was at a loss for words.

Yoritomo: He’s alright now. His fever has completely subsided and he’s been looking pretty bored for a while.

I turned my gaze to Rindoumaru and looked into a pair of midnight-blue coloured eyes that looked exactly like Yoritomo’s.

(He definitely looks a lot better and his fever has indeed gone down.)

I breathed a sigh of relief as I checked on him.

Yuno: Thank goodness…

Rindoumaru grabbed my finger and let out the most adorable giggle I’ve ever heard.

Yoritomo: The nanny already told me the details. You go rest. I’ll look after him.

Yuno: But, Lord Yoritomo, you must be exhausted too…

I stopped mid sentence.

(We’ve had this conversation before.)

Yoritomo: Just who do you think I am?

Yuno: Right.

Yoritomo said exactly what I expected him to, and I couldn’t help but smile at it.

Yuno: … You’re an important person in all of our lives — you’re my husband, and Rindoumaru’s father.

Yoritomo’s eyes widened in surprise a little before he chuckled and said,

Yoritomo: … We’ve reached this point, huh.

He then came closer to me ——

Yuno: Nn…

He gave me a gentle kiss on my lips.

A few days later ——

I was completely recovered from my illness, and was writing away at my writing desk.

Yoritomo: What’s that you’re writing?

Yoritomo peeked curiosly over my shoulder to look at my desk.

Yuno: It’s a record of Rindoumaru’s growth.

(I want to see Rindoumaru. I can’t wait till tomorrow comes.)

I saw Rindoumaru every day, but I’d start to miss him the moment we’re separated.

Yuno: Rindoumaru should be asleep by now.

Yoritomo: I think so too.

Suddenly, he embraced me from behind.

(Because I’ve been bedridden for a while… it’s been a long time since I last received a hug like this.)

Yoritomo’s scent and body heat made my heart race.

I started feeling that just a hug wasn’t enough.

Yuno: Um… shall we go to sleep now?

Yoritomo: … You really want to sleep?

Yuno: Erm…

It was as if he had read my mind like a book.

Yoritomo: It’s boring if the night just ends like this.

Yoritomo: It’s time for children to go to sleep, but… you’re not a child, are you?

Yoritomo cupped my cheek with his palm and looked into my eyes.

Yoritomo: —— From today onwards, you’re all mine and only mine.

Yuno: Ah…

I couldn’t possibly resist those seductive words ——

I closed my eyes and was pulled into a deep kiss.

#ikemen genjiden #ikegen story event #ikemen series #cybird ikemen #cybird otome #otome

[swashbucklery]

I'm the original anon asking about those ship comparisons and I'm sorry that I even made a response. That other person is getting really defensive.

Also, I clearly misinterpreted your use of your CR tag. Usually I just assume people are posting something with the interest of engaging in discussion. That was an incorrect assumption and I'm sorry.

Hi first anon! So, here's the thing. I actually really liked responding to your ask and having some friendly discussion; thank you for apologizing for your fellow anons' behaviour but it's not your fault.

My deal is like - and I've changed my CR tag because a third anon has emerged to inform me that my posts are showing up in the main tag which I was actively trying to avoid - I enjoy very specific elements of Critical Role in a very particular way only. And I recognize that's not the broader base's way of engaging or enjoying it! I want to talk about it, but only with people that 'get' my way of approaching it - so not exclusive to my dash, but intended to be a conversation with a much smaller group than it ended up being.

For context: I really like D&D! I've played it for years both as a DM and as a player, but my entry point vibes more with The Adventure Zone than with Critical Role, it that makes sense. The player's handbook is a list of Dungeons and Dragons suggestions, and the game that falls out of a DM's interpretation of it can be as serious or as lighthearted as they want but I always prefer lighthearted approaches. The main reasons I haven't picked up CR in the past have been 1) the extremely serious approach Matt takes to DMing and worldbuilding, which isn’t bad but is just not to my taste and 2) the sheer time commitment involved.

The second point is really my biggest hurdle. I’m a healthcare worker offline, and so since 2020 my time for fandom has been extremely limited for obvious reasons. I’ve barely been able to keep up with Supergirl and Legends, which combined are only 86 minutes a week. 3-5 hours of content every week is absolutely impossible for me, let alone catching up on back-episodes.

I started watching the cartoon + the EXU run because I was stuck isolating at home a couple of months ago and needed something to entertain myself since I couldn’t go anywhere. I liked the fact that the cartoon kept the bones of the C1 mythology but broke it down into a vastly shorter format. I also really loved EXU because it had a different DM. Aabriya works much much better for me; I love her approach to running a game and I liked Matt a lot better as a player than I do as a DM. I also loved the tighter plotting and worldbuilding for the EXU + EXU: Khymal runs, and the casting left out some of the players from the core cast that I don’t love which also helped me get more into it. I want to talk about EXU all fucking day and I wish it was its own fandom separate from CR; I see why it’s not because from the broader CR fandom perspective it’s a footnote but 42 hours of time for an entire story is so much more manageable than 230940843 hours or whatever it ends up being for a full campaign.

I have been slowly tiptoeing through C3; I was enjoying it at first but am starting to find it a bit of a slog because the pacing and vibe is just - I want it to be EXU and it’s not and that’s fine but it’s less my thing, which makes me sad. I’m mostly watching for Dorian because I want to fill in the story and mythology gaps between EXU and EXU Khymal and then write a ton of really fun and weird fanfiction. But Laudna and Imogen are sweet at least up to ep6, and I’d like to talk about them bc there’s meat there - although I think I’m a lot more interested in Laudna + daydreaming about how much I want Laudna to hang out with the Crown Keepers than I am in Imogen, tbh.

So it’s not that I don’t want to talk, it’s just that I’m really aware and up front about the fact that this fandom probably isn’t going to be for me; especially not if there’s an expectation that I’m current on canon to participate. I’m not going to be able to keep up with 4 hours of content a week, and I know that as C3 continues to air I’m going to get even more behind because the time investment is just not something I can arrange my life to manage. So I’m actually making a real effort to keep my discussion to circles where people kind of know that about my approach to CR and are not going to tell me to come back when I’ve seen all of the episodes, is really more my perspective.

#trying my new tag to see if this stays out of the main tag #the matthew mercer dungeons and dragons twitch cinematic universe #night of the living anons #also not enough people have explained erika iishi's character yet #and i am capital i intrigued #the great laudnimogenkaralena debacle of 22

[growingdesires]

Find all my Free Stories here

All my Links are here including: Patreon, Amazon Library (Kindle unlimited content), Gumroad and socials

Hungry - Chapter 2

Monday morning and it is miserable outside, here you sit, soggy from the walk to class at an empty chemistry bench. The seat beside you is usually occupied by Emily but with 2 minutes remaining it is still empty. “That is strange, she is never late”. You pull out your phone from your pocket and send a message to Emily Matt: Morning, where are you at Em? Emily: Running late! Should be about 15-20 minutes, long story, I’ll fill you in later You nobily inform Mr Fletcher that Emily is running late, he grumbles something about “Kids these days” as you retake your seat. After 15 minutes Emily enters the lab and apologizes to Mr Fletcher as she hurries to her seat next to you. “Everything ok?” you ask “Peachy… yeah, fine… not a good time” she says with almost a nervousness in her voice “Ok.... maybe later?” She nods “What did I miss?” she changes the subject You catch her up and continue the class as normal. You can’t help but notice she looks absolutely wiped out. Heavy bags sit under her eyes and she looks a bit pale. Finally the lesson ends and Mr Fletcher dismisses us. You grab your stuff and head out the door with her just behind you. You turn to meet her face when you feel a tug at your wrist, she is leading you out of the main campus building. “Where are we going?” you ask, she doesn’t respond. You decide to just go along for the journey. You arrive at her dorm and she quickly rushes you inside. The place is a lot messier than you remember from the party. “I’m sorry for being weird and the mess, I’ll explain everything, let me just get something” Before you can reply she rushes from the living room to the fridge and returns with a vial of a pink liquid. “This is why I was late to class. After I left your place yesterday I couldn’t get that asshole Brad out of my head. I wanted to show him who is a flat chested nerd” “Has she lost her mind?” you think “I can see that look in your eyes Matt, I’m sane I promise. My passion project has been to create a chemical or potion if you will that can help alter people’s appearances” You look at her like she has just told you Santa isn’t real “It’s not as insane as *Poof* I’m now a model, it alters your metabolism and redirects fat around your body. In future I hope it can alter DNA and maybe allow it to change more than just where fat is stored” “Surprisingly that scientific reasoning doesn’t make me think you sound any less insane” you chuckle, thankfully she smiles “I know it does sound crazy, I’ve been working on this for years. I have been so close for a few months to finishing it but yesterday I threw myself into the work as I wanted the distraction and I started having some breakthroughs and then without realising it was morning and I saw your text and here it is” she holds the vial high triumphantly “Wow. Em, that is super cool and it can be incredibly beneficial to the world. You could change so many people's lives and in a much less invasive way to surgery and I’m sure you can make some money off of it too” you exclaim “Yeah I guess… truth be told, I’m doing this for me right now” without any hesitation she downs the vial “EM!” you shout She lowers the vial from her lips and looks at you, your shocked face must’ve been quite the sight as she starts laughing “Hey? What's so funny?” you ask “You should see your face” she continues to chuckle “I mean you did just drink a potentially dangerous vial” “Give me some credit Matt, I’ve spent years on this” “Do you at least feel any different… or like how will you know if it worked” “I guess we need to just wait” she shrugs “could be a few hours, days or even weeks” “Quite anticlimactic I suppose. Why did you take them anyway?” “I am tired of being that “Flat chested nerd” I want to be sexy” She blushes “Move some fat around and suddenly I’ve got plump rear and more padding up top” she shakes her hips and chest. You watch her shake and imagine her changing. She notices your eyes becoming a bit blank. “Sorry Matt… a bit inappropriate but you must admit it would be nice. Anyway I’ve got to get some shut eye. Please keep this a secret and I’ll keep you updated on my progress” “Secret is safe with me. I do worry though Em, what if something bad happens?” “I’ll be fine, I’ll message you when I get up, how about that?” “Sounds good to me, I’ll get out of your hair, get some sleep”        

#weightgain #weight #gain #story #expansion #writer

[zandellion0148]

UNTITLED

Word Count: 1013

Trigger Warning: homophobic, & angst

Note: There will be many triggers and homophobic angst, If you are triggered please do not proceed further. There is also a slight smut with Alpha/Omega content so be WARNED. So that's it! Hope you guys enjoy this story ^^

“DAMN IT DAD!!! WOULD YOU JUST SHUT UP?! I-AM-SICK-AND-TIRED-OF-YOU-TELLING-ME-WHAT-TO DO.” I said it in a fitting rage, then my mother talked back in a cold demure voice. “My son you do know it is customary for us men to marry the same gender. Isn’t it? I and your father were like that too at first but in the end, you would come to agree and love each other.” I just couldn’t understand why we have to marry the same sex, isn’t it supposed to be the opposite? But this tribe of ours wants us to marry a guy, get it? A GUY. As for me I am not like the others here, I prefer holding a woman instead of a man. “THAT’S IT I’M OUT.” BANG!!! (DOORS SHUT) “Hon, what should we do? I've set him to meet his spouse.” He sadly said, “Don’t worry he’ll come around, and maybe he too will be able to love someone again…”

As I neared the forest's end, I spotted the city, which shone brightly against the night sky. I usually come and go here to have some fun with the city's women because our tribe was mostly made up of men. As I neared the club, there were full of people wanting to glimpse the ladies. I approached one but she got snatched away from me. “Hey, you know I was the first to approach her.” I said to the guy in front of me “Yea, so what?” pissed off I didn’t even look back. I then continued to enter the club and it was bustling as ever. Full of people anywhere I go, I sat on the empty seat in the corner, and then a lady approached me. We had a good time and as usual, I was about to ask her to play with me but suddenly my legs felt weak and I suddenly slipped. “Oh Gosh! Are you okay?!” surprised, she then helped me stand up and brought me to the sofa. “Hehe, I’m sorry… Do excuse me, I just need to go to the restroom.” I embarrassingly excused myself and went straight to one of the stalls.

“Shambles! Why does it have to be now?!” mortified of today’s events, I had to go back since it was the day of my heat. Every month during the fourth week, I have to go through this since this is one of the days when I could be able to conceive a child. “Shoot! I have to go back before someone sees me in this state.” As I exited the stall there was a guy staring at me. I didn’t bother giving a second glance so I wouldn’t look suspicious but then he suddenly took my hand and brought me to his arms and kissed me. As I was resisting he then grasp my ass and stick his finger in it. “FUDGE! TAKE IT OUT!!! I SAID TAKE IT O---” he kissed me once more to shut me up. Kissed passionately, I have never experienced it with my partners in bed. We then moved on to a nearby love hotel, where it lasted until the seventh day of the week. As I woke up I saw him sleeping beside me. My body was sore after doing it. I felt disgusted with myself after promising myself to never do it with a guy, then I suddenly stood up and put my clothes on, and hurriedly went outside so he wouldn’t be able to catch me.

When I reached the forest I first went to the river and took a bath and cleaned my ass so I wouldn’t get pregnant. I then went back home silently so I wouldn’t be found out. “Son?” KNOCK! KNOCK! “Y/N?” “O-Oh, dad…what is it?” I startledly asked, “It’s about your spouse…he will be coming here later 10 am, so you need to get ready.” I can’t believe he asked me to meet up with him when he knows I don’t want to which I thought to myself. I sighed and said fine. As the meeting time drew closer, I fixed myself and waited till I heard a knock. “Hello?” he then said while knocking “Hello to you too ---” I stopped, it was the guy from last night. I just couldn’t believe it was him. “Hi Damien, please do enter. This is my son beside me and my husband sitting over there.” my mother introduced. We talked about many things but I just couldn’t look at him because of those nights we had.

After the talk, we then said our goodbyes but then he sought me out and told me “I also don’t like men okay cause I’m straight. Just forget about those nights we had and our little past.” After hearing that I felt a prick in my heart and didn’t mind it. “Don’t worry I feel the same way.” We then didn’t have any contact for almost 3 months and we did our thing. I would usually go to the club and play, and sometimes I would see him too but then in the fifth month, I didn’t feel good. My dad would yell at me and tell me, I was pregnant for about 5 months and didn’t know who the father was because of that incident. Though obviously, I didn’t tell her that it was my fiance. As my tummy was getting bigger I felt conscious about not aborting the child so I then just raised her not to be like me. We then left the tribe and searched for a suitable place in the city and as time passed by, my little darling grew. “Mama, you don’t have to worry about me not having a papa.” She smiled at me with those sparkling beautiful eyes. “But sweetie just don’t end up like me, I know when I was in my youthful days, I was a bad child to my parents because of that incident. Even if the person didn’t love you remember there are still people who still care and will love you.” “Just like you mama?” “Yes…just like me.” I then smiled at her lovingly and still on that very day, I was still longing for him to be with me…

||Word by: Anonie-Writer||

#writing #short story #short fiction #alpha omega #smut