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#still clearing out old memes
irresistiibles · 2 years
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@skyfcll​ asked: ☃ — [sender] offers [receiver] a cup of hot cocoa/apple cider ( jiang cheng & nie huaisang )
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“i don’t suppose you have anything fun to pour in here?” huaisang couldn’t help but ask after looking at the cup. it wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate a warm drink, but it felt a little childish without even a little bit of alcohol. “is this supposed to be some sort of check in sect leader jiang? this have gotten rather ugly lately.” whether he took that as reference to the recent halloween disaster or some of the less favorable faces that had shown up in washington, nie huaisang would leave that up to jiang cheng, never wanting to directly provoke someone himself.
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ying-doodles · 19 days
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my brain is running a million miles a minute rn
help
#ying rambles#let me try to just spew out my ideas in here so i'm not making so many individual posts#uh let's see#i wanna make an underwater version of void ying (my main sona rn)#where instead of having stars all over there's little fish? and they're wearing a clear raincoat and boots#i wanna draw myself in little outfits again (like those old wardrobe memes that are like pjs casual formal etc)#i need to actually sit down and draw new pfps for main and spam cause i'm tired of my current ones#it seems like the reverse absolutes are winning the poll so i have to come up with an archangel javier design (not that hard actually)#but i want to try to draw his rainbow wings in that piece?? maybe??#and then there's the turnaround i just talked about that i have to figure out#cause that's like what. 4 frames if we keep it simple (front left back right). or 8 if we do quarter turns (so many angles..)??#and then there's the drifting closer comic that's in second place in the poll#i have a vague idea of what i want it to look like but i need to sit down and sketch it to actually figure it out#and then at some point i need to figure out what the fck i'm drawing for the tged zine#cause i don't actually know what i'm gonna do yet (but i have until june to think on it i guess)#and. and...#... i think that's everything?#no there's still a lot of other stuff i wanna do but these tags are so long by now..#if you read them all uh good on you i guess?#i gotta go to bed i need to cease thinking-
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siixkiing · 1 year
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You know the one update I’d actually enjoy tumblr? UNLIMITED QUEUE.
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DC x DP Prompt
To the delight of Gotham's citizens, and the dismay of her criminal underbelly, the GCPD has a new specialized unit that ACTUALLY apprehends criminals and brings them to justice!
It's a relatively small squad of mostly young adults, who looked fresh out of their teens. But age didn't matter once they got the work done. And they did, as they've already got criminals like Penguin, Riddler, and Bane behind bars for what looks to be 'for good'.
No one besides Commissioner Gordan knows anything about the squad as they operate as a mostly separate entity from GCPD. It was rare to see any of them, and any photos taken were unusually blurry. They are also extremely secretive; if you exclude their social media which are usually just shit posts, memes, and thirst edits of the Wayne family.
They were a total mystery. Almost as mysterious as Batman.
But those who have seen/worked with the squad before all had the same thing to say about them. They were cool. They had an unusually effective method. And their leader is a menace. With his sharp teeth and pointed smile. And bright blue eyes that spoke to your soul. It was a pleasure to see/ work with him, it really was. But they weren't planning on doing so again for a long time.
That being said, Gotham had been quiet for a while. A bit too quiet if you ask anyone, especially the Bats. Strangely, it didn't feel like the usual calm before the shit storm. The instinctual pit in their guts that usually formed just wasn't there. This was different. This wasn't the calm before the storm. This was the ocean receding. But no one seemed to realize it yet.
Not until the tsunami came crashing down on them.
The GCPD special unit accounts that had been inactive for the last three months suddenly pinged to life. Everyone who followed them clicked the notification almost immediately. With this unnerving calm surrounding them, who the hell didn't want to see what batshit crazy statement they would make after three months of radio silence.
What they didn't expect, was to see a crystal-clear picture of justice finally being served.
The picture was a selfie, taken in an abandoned warehouse. In the middle of the dirty floor was the Joker. He was tied up and his head hung low. You could see how beaten he was, his clothes torn and bloody. His face paint was also coming off, revealing pale blotchy skin. Reminding everyone that, he was still human, just like the rest of them.
Behind him, all lined up with smiles on their faces, was Team Phantom. They were a bit bloody and bruised as well but overall in much better condition. They weren't wearing the normal GCPD navy blue uniform, but black and white ones. All stylized to fit the wearers taste. They all looked so young, but their eyes looked like old tired eyes, finally getting some relief.
From in the corner was their leader. Only part of his face was in the picture. One glowing blue eye, and part of his Cheshire smile. His hand making a peace sign next to the Joker. Even with only part of his being shown, everyone could tell he was relived as well.
And while the picture itself was shocking, the caption was what really got them. The top was what you would usually expect from the team. A big bold 'GOT EM' ' at the top. But at the bottom in small, almost unnoticeable text was:
"He will face his punishment. We will get our retribution. May we finally rest in peace."
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rboooks · 1 year
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DC x DP Fic idea: The Royal Consort
Wesley Weston runs a blog after getting over his desire to expose Danny's secret- primarily due to no one believing him- and no one pays attention to it since almost all of Casper high school has one too.
The difference between the hundreds of other blogs is that one of his pictures of Phantom is clear. A perfectly uncorrected image of the famous ghost, whereas nearly all other pictures are blurry due to ghosts disrupting cameras. Even Wes isn't sure how he managed to capture him so well.
Another difference between his blog and others is that one of his followers happens to be John Constantine, who followed the kid a long time ago due to the fanfiction of the Bats and found them hilarious.
John opens his phone app, expecting a new chapter to the Bruce Wayne/Superman fic, and spits out his tea upon seeing the High King of the Dead casually in the human world. Horrified that the King has not been appropriately welcomed- which could lead to a war that the humans would never win- he calls an emergency Justice League and Justice League Dark meeting.
It didn't help that they had allowed a county to pass the anti-ecto laws, which ruined any attempt to appease the Ghost King once the news broke to the public. The League still worried about a declaration of war even after they demolished the laws and the United Nations had the States apologize on humans' behalf.
They quickly discover High King Phantom has been visiting Earth for almost three years. Before his coronation, Phantom had not been outside the Infinite Realms very often though he has appeared throughout history. Cave drawings date back thousands of years before the first ancient Egyptians, but he's visits are few and short.
Life would naturally send him back to the Realms because he had too much power and ectoplasm. After taking the throne, his powers only grew, which meant someone had to summon him as the only way for him to stay on Earth longer than an hour.
Now as King, he appeared only within the small town of Amity Park daily. Why?
John sighs. "He has an anchor. Someone is tying him to this plane. Like the helmet for Nabu, which allows Doctor Fate to exist here without being launched back to the Infinite Releams, Phantom has bonded himself. And I know who that is"
He pulls up a class photo on Weston's blog and points to a boy wearing a particular necklace.
"Danny Fenton is wearing the official Royal Consort of the Infinite Realms symbol and has been since he was fourteen. Phantom's husband may be our only hope to salvage the terrible mess the USA's bloody GIW placed the rest of us in."
Danny loved the necklace he found in Pariah Dark's old haunt. He inherited Pariah's haunt and everything inside once he was crowned and hasn't taken it off since. He didn't think it would be an issue. It's not like it would out his secret to his parents or anyone else since it was in Ghost Speech. Even he didn't know what it said.
Then one morning he comes down for breakfast only to have the most important members of the Justice League sitting in his living room waiting to greet him.
Desperate to keep his halfa status a secret, Danny must convince the entire world watching him, that he's just a human who scandalously eloped at age fourteen with one of the strongest beings in the mulitverse.
Jack's horrified "We were shooting my son-in-law this whole time" became a meme that has trended for months.
( Part 2 )
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twobluejeans · 10 months
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HEARTBREAK ON TOUR!
charles leclerc x famous!reader
summary: in which the lavender haze has been lifted. or in which america’s it couple splits.
part 9:foreign affairs, series masterlist
faceclaim: madison beer
ally’s radio 📻: PART 9! anyways, stan y/n l/n for clear skin and good grades!✨😌
INSTAGRAM, july 18
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liked by carlossainz, landonoriss, and 12,654,234 others
yourinstagram mood :') gonna cry all day lol. thank you for your warmth. thank you for listening n hearing me. i love you.
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ntltcy/n whoever said the second slide is so real
danielricciardo I said what I said
zendaya ma’am is taking up all 10 spots on the 10 ten…that’s my best friend ❤️!!!
channeleclerc16_ she should just stick to acting…
beyonce well deserved! the song brought actual tears to my eyes
 yourinstagram beyonce  screaming crying shaking…thank u, i love u always
leclerc_pascale beautiful girl congrats
 yourinstagram leclerc_pascale  thank u mama
drewstarkey on repeat i fear 
ferarrileclerc i mean ... since the song is about charles that means he got another number one hit! charles congrats baby!
harrystyles A beautiful song from an even more beautiful person. Congratulations, Y/n/n—H.
ypurinstagram thank u sweet angel. miss you!
redlipclassicy/n harrystyles yourinstagram WHAT THE FUCK
JULY 18, 2023
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Lola Ransdell Under Fire for Using the N-Word in Resurfaced Tweets
Not a good look.
BY ALLY JULY 17, 2023 11:15 AM
Lola Randell has some explaining to do. The 25-year-old came under fire on Sunday when Twitter users began resurfacing tweets of the model using the N-word in 2020. The receipts included direct messages and Instagram comments, in which Ransdell called her friends the racial slur, as well as tweets from Ransdell claiming that she could use the N-word because she’s “not white.”
In screenshots resurfaced by the Twitter PopHub, Ransdell can be seen calling someone an “ugly” N-word. The screenshots also include a group chat with some of her friends, in which she is called out for using the N-word. In her response, Randell explains that she can use the derogatory term because she’s not white. (Ransdell’s mother is Brazilian, but that still does not excuse her behavior.) “I’m not white tho so that’s awk,” Ransdell responded.
However, the receipts don’t end there. Along with the first screenshots, some users also resurfaced other old tweets, in which Ransdell said that she returned a “different race” after she spent some time tanning in Florida. (She accompanied the tweet with an emoji of a man with a turban.) Another screenshot also shows Ransdell liking a 2020 meme comparing Jay-Z to a Ransdell. One user also claimed to have a video of Ransdell rapping the N-word, though the audio is unclear.
Ransdell allegedly once tweeted, "leaving to Florida white but coming back to NY a different Race." The statement was accompanied by an emoji of a white blonde man and an emoji of a darker-skinned man wearing a turban.
A post from 2019 read, "With @chanteljefferies and that awkward moment when ur at a Chinese restaurant and your waiter isn't Chinese...."
The following year, she allegedly threatened, "Shut up before I smack you back to your own country!"
Screenshots also show the youtuber allegedly liking an Instagram post from 2018 about how only men and women should marry because the Bible says so.
Then there are the women-hating posts.
Ransdell allegedly liked an undated Instagram post showing a photo of Selena Gomez that posed the question, "Would you smack her for $835 BILLION?!" The person whose reply was featured in the meme read, "I'd smack her for a sweet tea from McDonald's."
In 2018, Ransdell allegedly tweeted about transgendered women" being "wicked slutty."
She's also been accused of openly hating on her boyfriend’s former partner, Y/n L/n.
Once a fan of Charles (and even of Charles and Y/n together), Ransdell  seemingly turned on the 26-year-old singer when "Your/Ship/Name" was on the rocks.She allegedly once followed a Y/n L/n  hate account on Instagram and allegedly favorited/liked a tweet from 2022 that showed a picture of Y/n and read, "She collects guys as if they were infinity stones."
How these receipts surfaced is unclear (many of them are private messages between Ransdell and her friends, so someone must have leaked them on the internet), but it’s certain that people aren’t happy with Ransdell using slur, even as a joke. After the tweets resurfaced, many users took to Twitter to call out Ransdell for her offensive behavior, as well as demand accountability and an apology from her and her Formula One boyfriend, Charles Leclerc. 
SEE MORE RELATED POSTS:
• Charles Leclerc finally addresses messy breakup with Singer Y/n L/n.
•Harry Styles just commented on Y/n L/n’s Instagram post for the first time in 7 years.
• Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince: Harry Styles and Y/n L/n’s relationship timeline
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INSTAGRAM, july 18
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liked by f1wh0re, corneliastreety/n, and 546,782 others
y/naflorals CHAR!ES SPEAKING ABOUT MOTHER TODAY IN AN INTERVIEW
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dressy/n no comment.
lewismercedes ur joe king…ur joe. king.
leclerc16charles as a charles fan…idk either i’m sorry
TWITTER, july 18
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INSTAGRAM STORIES, july 18
yourinstagram 9m
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viewed by charlotee_siine, lewishamilton, and 245,321 others
TWITTER, july 18
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ally’s radio 📻:i don’t like this chapter 😞. also pls know that anything that was mentioned within lola’s article is not something i condone!! pls don’t think i’m a bad person, it’s literally only just for the plot😭!! i got inspo off of hailey biebers old tweets sooo. if u see ur username but u weren’t tagged, it’s bc tumblr wouldn’t let me :( if u asked me to tag u and i didn’t, pls send me a message or inbox me bc it might’ve gotten lost 😭 i try to stay up-to-date but sometimes i miss people so pls lmk!!!
taglist 🦢🪩: @incoherenciass@dakotali@405rry@topaz125@sassyheroneckgiant@hevburn@itsmytimetoodream@ivegotparticulartaste@crowdedimagines @asterianax @haydee5010@scenesofobx@christinabae@magical-spit@dessxoxsworld@myareadsbooks@honethatty12@hopefulinlove@diasnohibng@gentlemonsterjennie1@hummusxx@eugene-emt-roe@taestrwbrry @perjarma @cxcewg@chimchimjiminie16@glow-ish@allywthsr @millyswife@mrsmaybank13@black-swan-blog27 @stargaryenx@lilsiz@ohthemisssery@leclerclvr@slytherinjimin3nthusiast@shessthunderstoms@cool-ultra-nerd@ncentic@playboykenz @canvashearts @tinyhrry @xeliaaaa @ifionlywould @gaviypedrisbride @callsignwindow @dhhdhsiavdhaj@chasing-liberosis@laneyspaulding19@a-daydreamersday@saikikusouswife@motorsp0rt@lifesuckslife@shessthunderstoms@drewsandsebastianswife @sainzluvrr@ietss @agustdlvr @sarahkaliii @sweethoneyblossom1@sticksdoesart @ayoanna @c0wgirlswag @ifionlywould @l1ghtaura @ellesmythe @avada-kedavra-bitch-187
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sugawarassoulmate · 7 months
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no nut november - nov 15
making it halfway isn't so bad...
professor!sugawara & enemies to lovers!kita
word count: 353 & 429
cw: fem!reader, age gap relationship (reader is in their 20s/suga is in his late 30s), college student/professor relationship, oral (f receiving), hate sex, name-calling, minors dni
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professor!sugawara
"so you don't want to have sex?" sugawara asks bluntly, confused by the weird challenge you were proposing to him
he's aware of the age gap between you two but it's never really come up before (except from explaining the occasional meme to him)
but when you came into his office to talk about some weird bet you made with your friends, his old man brain couldn't comprehend it.
"we can have sex, i just can't finish," you trail off, probably realizing how dumb you sounded. "i mean, i can just blow you or something."
that makes sugawara look up from the papers he's grading, hazel eyes staring at you once again.
"you can't cum?" he asks, quirking his brown when you nod your head. "what's the point then?"
you try to explain to him that it's a test of endurance, a fun game between your friends.
as you ramble on, sugawara clears the papers off his desk, putting them in a drawer where they wouldn't be tampered with
"are you done?" he asks when you finally take a breath. you nod once more and sugawara gets up and motions for you to sit on his desk.
"kou—professor...," you fix yourself before sugawara could reprimand you, remembering that he doesn't appreciate being called by his first name when the two of you are still on campus.
your words fall of deaf ears with sugawara sitting you down anyways, long fingers reaching for the button of your jeans.
"did you really think i wouldn't let you cum?" sugawara asks, swiftly tugging your pants down your legs. "you think i'd just let you take care of me without returning the favor?"
sugawara crouches before you, pushing your panties to the side to be met with your already wet cunt.
"when have i ever been that selfish?" sugawara's thumb easily finds your clit, making your legs shake and thighs clench. "look at this pretty, pussy. gonna make it cream on my tongue."
sugawara dives in and you're putty in his hands, cumming in a matter of minutes and completely forgetting all about the foolish bet.
enemies to lovers!kita
kita knew what you were trying to do and he wasn't going to fall for it
at least...he's trying his very best not to fall for it
when you heard that kita was thinking about participating in atsumu's dumb bet, you couldn't stop teasing him
"of course atsumu would come up with this," you snorted. "he cries when he gets a crumb of pussy."
but lately kita's noticed you've been trying to get his attention—trying to get him to break
from wearing that perfume he's mentioned somewhat liking in the past to bending down in front of him while wearing the shortest skirt you own
kita is above your tactics...for the most part, ignoring the small surges of pleasure he feels in his crotch
when you ask him to come over, he says yes without thinking
you don't ever invite kita to your place unless it's to fuck but he finds himself sitting on your couch watching a movie
of course, you couldn't let him off that easily as you wore the skimpiest camisole that had your tits practically spilling out
but then you're slightly grazing his arm or leaning over so kita can see down your shirt and it's so stupid.
kita would never fall for that, it's completely beneath him.
he has complete control over his emotions, he has discipline, he's not weak minded
but he's still just a man at the end of the day
"yer so fuckin' annoying," kita says finally, pushing you into the couch cushions and getting on top.
"i know," you smirk, your stupid ego absolutely buzzing
"i fuckin' hate you,"
"i know," you say again as kita tears through both of your clothes to push his cock inside you
kita whispers the most obscene insults in your ear, calling you things he would never say in public but you've royally pissed him off and he shows it by fucking harder than he ever has before
each stroke of his fat cock has your eyes rolling to the back of your head, your brain turned to mush
he has you creaming around him but he doesn't let up, fucking you through multiple orgasms
instead of cumming in you like he usually does, kita pulls out at the last moment to jerk himself off, sending hot, thick ropes of his cum on your stomach
your bliss quickly turns to disgust, shoving kita away as you bitch about the mess he left behind
"you're such a dick!" you whine, scurrying over to your bathroom
"i know," kita says, not too far behind you
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©sugawarassoulmate 2023 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!
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coco-loco-nut · 30 days
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Book Club - Part 8
Pairing: Grid x Reader, mentioned Lance x Reader
Summary: Headcanon-ish, book club reacting to clips of reader, short but utterly adorable
requests open masterlist
————————
In honor of your fifth season and your birthday, the F1 social media team has gathered your best friends to comment on some moments across your five years in F1:
Moment One
When you joined your first team, a video resurfaced of you from your days in F3, you admitted that your Formula One crush is Nick Hülkenberg, "I mean, look at him when he was driving for Sauber!". Naturally, your team brought you in for a media video, made you watch it, and surprised you with THE Nico Hülkenberg standing behind you. Cue you crying, blushing, and hugging him. Kevin was there too, no one really knows why.
Nico and Kevin laugh, it's one of their favorite memories with you. Despite your mortification and admiration, they invited you to hang out with them in Haas. They genuinely wanted to get to know the newest member of the paddock, which started the best grid friendship. "I knew right away that we were going to be good friends," Kevin tells the interviewer. "My wife surprisingly found it hilarious, she loved Y/n from that moment, probably because she agreed with Y/n," Nico adds. "Not to brag, but we are her best friends,"
Moment Two
In your first year as a driver, you had the absolute pleasure of sitting in an interview with Lando, George, and Alex. It wasn't a press conference, so it was a lot more relaxed. As the three boys joked around and acted like, well, boys, your irritation was clear on your face.
"Oh! I remember that day, she went to find Nico and Kevin, who I was with at the moment and was complaining about how some of the younger drivers were too immature. We invited her to lunch with us and Valtteri," Fernando's face lights up at the clip. "I joked that we were like an old person book club, it ran from there," Valtteri says, smiling at the memory. "How many drivers are in the club now?" The interviewer asks. "We started with just the five of us, the number stands at 10 including Checo," Fernando says, having to think for a second. "I miss Checo, he really was the epitome of our club," Valtteri sighs.
Moment Three
One morning, you were walking into your motorhome, tired and not really paying attention, you slipped on a slick step, not quite having had the chance to dry after the overnight rainfall. You quickly got back up, acting like nothing happened.
"Ouch, poor Y/n, that must've hurt," Lewis grimaces, meanwhile George and Logan are laughing. "She hasn't gotten any better, still uncoordinated," Checo says, he returned just for this surprise. "Yeah, but she got right back up and acted like nothing happened, our unbothered queen," Daniel points out. "Guys, quit laughing at Y/n," Lewis looks at George and Logan disapprovingly. "Don't act like you didn't laugh when the video first came out," George replies, giving the older drivers a knowing look. "She's gonna murder us all," Logan's face loses its color, suddenly remembering the video is recording.
Moment Four
After a night out, you were dragged out of your bed by your wonderful boyfriend, you show up to the paddock with a wealth of juicy gossip. You quickly find Valtteri, Fernando, and Checo just past the gates. As the four of you speak, you spot a camera focused on you. The dirty look you sent it quickly became a meme.
"Haha, that was a great day for gossip, and I usually don't like it," Checo says. "Before you ask, no, we can't tell you what it was. Swore an oath never to share," Valtteri stares at the camera. "It was-" Fernando starts then pauses when the other two look at him. "haha, you thought I was going to spill the tea. I am not,"
Moment Five
Most of your career has been spend on bottom of the grid teams, so when you made your first podium, you couldn't help but to celebrate. Lance ran over to you as you pulled your helmet off. You pulled him into a kiss as the crowds cheered you on.
As soon as the video is shown, the group collectively gags and cringes. "We love them, but sometimes she forgets that we didn't sign up to watch them be all lovey," George tells the interviewer. "There is your proof that she loves someone more than me," Nico chuckles. "We were all so proud of her, we forced her to go to a celebratory dinner with us instead of Lance and Kimi," Logan provided some insight.
Moment Six
Your first win came with your return post injury. But the video that the drivers are shown doesn't just show that, it shows a part of one of your post-race interviews that was previously edited out. "Yeah, the car was good, I drove well too, but I genuinely think that if it weren't for my support system, I wouldn't be here. There were times when I thought about not resigning because I wasn't performing like I thought I should. My support system, they know who they are, reminded me why I drive and have reminded me of my passion. They provided so much guidance and wisdom, they introduced me to Kimi who is now, in every way that matters, my dad, I've taught them slang. More specifically for this race, they helped me recover from my injuries, especially after free practices and qualifying when I would be incredibly sore. Sorry that I'm yapping, I just love them all so much."
All of the guys are trying not to cry. "If it isn't clear by now, we all love her too," Lewis says, passing around tissues. "She really does glue us all together, doesn't she?" Kevin hums. "I've certainly enjoyed the past 4 years, it's hard to believe it's her fifth year here," Nico agrees. "She won before you did," Fernando teases him. "Seriously, we love her so much, not because she is the only woman, but because she is so easy to get along with. She is friends with everyone on the track, never spreads malicious gossip, and is just so down to earth," Daniel says, refocusing the group. "She immediately got Kimi, the Iceman, to like her, that says so much about her," Valtteri agrees.
Similarly to Nico and Kevin in the first clip shown, you are snuck in to watch the last bit. "Guys," you cry a little, pulling them into a group hug. "Happy birthday, hija," Fernando says, starting a euphony of similar comments. "I love you guys so much," you are fully crying. "We love you too, kiddo," Daniel wipes your tears, pulling you into a bear hug.
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saintescuderia · 2 months
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pancakes (pt. 3)
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AKA - the story of how the naive australian rookie befriended the gym junkie F1 hospitality worker with the shoe collection - and inadvertently broke the grid's most treasured and unspoken rule: you don't go for y/n.
series masterlist here :) // the pancakes recipe here :)
A/N: don't come for me. i love daniel. it's all for plot. (also, if the timeline seems odd it’s bc creative liberties have been taken 😌)
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P3 - stairmaster endurance
As you walked down the steps to the Drivers Gala in your stunning red dress, you were unaware how one Ferrari driver couldn’t take his eyes off you. Looking at you smiling elegantly to one of the reps who greeted you, Charles realised just how much of a mistake he had made. Carlos was at his side, saying something that was back ground noise. All Charles could focus on was you. Your flowing hair, your eyes glinting in the light as you smiled your beautiful smile at whoever was talking to you. You always spoke with such passion. Charles always loved that about you. He would always love every little thing about you—
The alarm went off. 
You blinked and stopped the timer notification that essentially shook you out of the deep rabbit hole of F1 fanfiction you had found yourself falling into. Closing the purple app, you wondered why you still remained on Tumblr even after the 2013 hype of it died and everyone shifted to Twitter. Let alone the fact that your Tumblr had become your closeted way to fangirl about the sport you had dedicated your life to.
Then again, what were you to expect? The algorithm clearly picked up on your interests. That or the government was listening in and knew that Formula 1 was your day-to-day. That would explain how, one day, you were simply scrolling through the random, niche memes and BAM! You were met with the completely random gif-set of Arthur Leclerc and Oscar Piastri sat in an interview for Prema. 
It had caught you off guard, seeing that come up on your phone screen. It had also been a while since you had seen Arthur. For the whole duration of that single and endless moment, you didn't know how to react.
So your thumb double tapped the screen.
And maybe it was your fault for liking it, for encouraging the algorithm. But you could’t help but smile at the gif of Arthur confident and proud of his 18 hour screen time. That boy had no filter and never gave a fuck about the social norm. That and he often just didn’t read the room. Even after all these years, and his climb up the motorsport ladders, that youthful element about him had remained. It made you smile. You always liked that about him.
However, with that gif-set came more stuff. Innocent stuff. More F2 bits - you really missed those boys - and then everything else. Funny bits of Max at Red Bull. Carlos and Lando. All the Guenther Steiner moments. It was a little weird to be liking gifs of a team principal, you were well aware, but if anything it just made you feel proud of how far the German-Italian had come.
Back in the old Red Bull days, Guenther would always tell you about his dreams of directing his own team. It was nice to see him finally achieve that. It was also an endless source of amusement for you.
For example: the day Kevin had shattered the door.
When it happened, though, it was definitely not a laughing matter. You had been just finishing up the lunch service at the Haas motorhome - making sure to pack up some food for the drivers and mechanics who still were in a meeting - when you had heard the loud noise. Mack, the sous-chef, had stopped and looked at you with wide eyes.
You had both exited the kitchen to walk out to the main space of the motorhome and see other Haas employees equally as confused and whispering. Not getting a clear answer, you patted Mack on the shoulder and returned to the kitchen to finish plating up Kevin and Romain’s lunch for later. 
Fifteen minutes later, however, and you had gotten your answer when Guenther stormed into the kitchen fuming. “He does not slam my fucking office door! What am I going to do? Call Gene and tell him his drivers are some fucking idiot babies?!”
You had simply stared at him, blinkingly.
Guenther had then spied a plate of food sitting on the bench. “That fucking driver doesn’t deserve any of your fucking food!” And he picked the plate and dumped plate with its contents in the bin.  
“Guenther," you had began in a calm voice, "that was my lunch. Kevin’s plate is in the fridge.”
“Well eat his fucking food! Or—" Guenther reached into his pocket and pulled out a credit card and slammed it onto the table in front of you. “Go to a fucking five star hotel and have lunch there on that fucking idiot baby's pay.”
And the two of you had actually done so.
Even after he calmed down, Guenther had been adamant to take you to lunch which, admittedly, wasn't the most odd thing ever. Guenther was removed enough from all the driver drama and you had known him a for long time. You were the reason he had helped in the debut in 2016 anyway.
Still, no matter how Guenther Guenther was, Kevin was still a driver. You knew how it might look.
Said driver, however, had thankfully just dismissed it when you offered to pay him back. "Make me those mini pizzas next time you're with us and we're good."
And so when you clocked on this morning to see you were covering Haas, you immediately smiled and went to make good on your promise to K-Mag.
You always loved working in the Haas motorhome. If only half the stuff you saw Guenther did and said ended up in gif-sets on Tumblr.
Pushing yourself off the stool, you pocketed your phone and grabbed the oven mitts to pull out the mini pizzas. You had made extra for the engineers since there was an issue with Nico’s PU and knew they would be up late working on the engine. It wasn’t a secret that your pizzas were a coveted snack, being low-carb and high protein enough for even the drivers to consume. You were half expecting Fred Vasseur to pop in and steal some. He did love these pizzas. Any time you were stationed at Alfa Romeo, it was a guarantee you would be making them at his request.
Though, now Fred was moving to Ferrari. So you weren't sure if he was still going to be nice to you. Mattia Binotto had always treated you like the fucking plague.
"Ah, Y/N. For fuck's sake!" You heard the German accent and felt your mouth curve up into a smile as Guenther arrived on scene. He was dressed in the Haas gear for 2023, lanyard around his neck. "You still here running the coffee when you can beat any of these idiots in the car."
You gave him a fake two finger salute. "If I drove, no one would stand a chance."
"Well maybe you could help us score some fucking points." Guenther said. Immediately, he got down to business. "Harry Kane did well last night. Scored two fucking goals."
You snorted. One of the many reasons you and Guenther bonded so well was that you one of the few people amongst this Paddock that took football seriously. Almost as seriously as Formula 1. Almost.
"Didn't see it." You said, shaking your head. Bundesliga was lower on your list of priorities when it came to games. You only paid attention to the German league when it came to teams making it into Champions League. Besides, Guenther should’ve known what game you were watching last night. Still, you reminded him. "The Reds were playing."
He rolled his eyes, though unsurprised. "Of course you're going to watch English fucking football."
"Hey, only because of Salah.” You reminded him and hit your chest proudly, “I gotta represent."
"That much is fucking obvious." Guenther said. One of the many reasons you liked working in Haas so much was that it was by far the most relaxed garage out of them all. For example, you hadn't yet taken off the hoodie you wore which had, on top, the number 10 Liverpool jersey. It looked unprofessional, having a t-shirt over a jumper like that, especially mixed with the headscarf you had tied on your head like a durag, but Guenther couldn’t care less. If anything, he was probably just offended at your choice of EPL team.
“United is fucking Red.”
"Ah, Guenther. You know my heart really lies." You reminded him.
Your uncle, with his love for football, had brought you up following the iconic Real Madrid. He literally visited the hospital with a teddy bear and Bernabeu membership, adamant he would get his newborn niece into the sport. No matter what.
From the moment he found out your number one team, Guenther was salty. “Los Blancos.” He scoffed. “The fucking villains of football." He came round to see the circular pieces of bread covered with sauce and an array of different toppings. Guenther picked one up - and immediately dropped it. "Fuck!"
"It's hot." You said, dryly. You took out another tray and set it down. You closed the oven door and turned it off. You flipped the towel over your shoulder as you watched Guenther now at the sink, running water over his burnt fingers.
"You don't fucking say." Guenther blowing on his fingers.
“Stop being a baby.” You laughed, bringing up your hands to your head to fix your headscarf.
Guenther ignored that comment. "Fred fucking loves these things. Don't tell him you made them. I don't want him in here stealing them."
You said nothing and turned around to pretend to busy yourself with the trays of mini pizzas. It was best to just remain quiet sometimes. Bahrain testing had kept everyone occupied and at that start of the season F1 Hospitality were usually running around after Stefano Domenicali and the FIA Co. for last minute set up. It was only into the race calendar that Hospitality were eventually went around to the teams.
So, no. You hadn't seen Fred. You hadn't seen anyone. You were just grateful that your first race of 2023 was in the safety of Haas. Nico and Kevin were older and, therefore, a little more out of it when it came to driver drama. If they knew anything, they were old enough to be mature about it.
Though, that couldn't be the same of others from their generation. You were already losing sleep from the feelings that arose from seeing Daniel in Red Bull gear. It didn't help that the last time you two had spoken, things hadn't exactly been civil.
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You were on the stair-master. The clock on the machine read 37:48. The sweat was dripping off you.
Your grey jumper had darkened in shades, wet from the sweat. You kept your hands on your head as you stepped and stepped and stepped and stepped. Angsty rap music blasted into your ears. Tinnitus was likely to worsen, but you would take that over the shit storm that was currently breaking all over the Paddock. 
I understand that, without my agreement, Alpine F1 have put out a press statement late this afternoon that I am driving for them next year. This is wrong and I have not signed a contract for Alpine for 2023. I will not be driving for Alpine next year. 
Oscar hadn’t even yet joined Formula 1 and he was already stirring trouble. That was a problem. For you. You were supposed to lay low. The whole point of this was to lay low and not drawing any attention to yourself. The agreement was that you could still be there if only in the role of Hospitality. 
And the idiot had tweeted that and then, ten minutes later, decided to follow you.
How he even found your Twitter was surprising? It wasn’t very personal - your profile picture was solid black - so no fans would be able to recognise you. But the Paddock? The FIA and your bosses? They were raising confused eyebrows that Oscar Piastri would drop that bomb and then follow you.
You could already imagine what Otmar was going to say. God, the 2023 season hadn’t fully started and you were already dreading walking into the Alpine home. And then Jos Verstappen was rumoured to be attending more races this year and who could forget about Daniel coming back to Red Bull? The universe apparently needed to give you some character development, it seemed.
Your legs ached, begging to stop. Your mind thought about pressing the red emergency button, to just end it. But you knew better. You knew this was all a mind game. Pain is an allusion. Keep going. Shit hurts but you push through. Keep going. Keep going. Keep fucking going. It's what you always told yourself. It's how you got yourself through everything. It's how you'll get through all of this. If you can push through the pain of the stairmaster, then you can push through the pain of anything. You had learned that pain was temporary and it was just a mind-game. You could always go longer than you thought possible. You just had to keep reminding yourself of that fact. So, right now, it was just practice. Each step you took right now was practicing the endurance of pain from this stairmaster fucking filling your legs. If you could get through this, you would be able to handle any drama in the future.
Unfortunately, drama walked through the door before you could make it through the current pain of said stairmaster.
Daniel Ricciardo stormed into the Driver’s Only Gym, knowing all too well that this was where you would be. He had been the one to tell you about this fucking place in the first place. Before everything, you had always loved working out and exercise was part of the reason you two ended up as you did. Now, you didn’t have the luxury you did before. You didn’t have the lanyard.
So, now, you had to workout in the shadows.
That didn't mean Daniel didn't see you. Didn't hear you. Didn't know what you were doing every single day of every weekend the both of you avoided each other at the Paddock. He knew you still wore your sneakers according to the race location. He knew you still wore headscarves when in the Middle East and covered your tattoos when in Japan. He knew you still avoided Charles just he like he knew you still avoided him. He knew you.
So Daniel knew you woke up at 4am every day to work out. And after Zak Brown told him the news, he spent the night dealing with his spiralling career through a bottle of Jack Daniels. Then he had the idea to come out from the four walls of his hotel room and see you.
Because Daniel knew you had made your pancakes for the rookie, that fucking Oscar Piastri. And Daniel was one of the few people who knew, who fully understood just what that meant to you.
Drunk and emotional, Daniel planted himself right in front of the stair master. He stared at you, caught like a deer in headlights and got right to it.
“You must be fucking happy.”
It was the first time he had directly spoken to you in five years.
So it took you a second to process what was happening.
Daniel Ricciardo was right here, in front of you, at 4:50 in the morning as you sweated your body weight out through the repeated steps you took on the machine.
Suddenly you were aware that you had rolled yourself out of bed with a little less motivation than the norm. You had been extra tired, hitting snooze more than twice. You hadn’t washed your face and you wondered if Daniel would be able to spot the stain of egg yolk on your hoodie. It had been some time since he had been this close to you and you were in bike shorts and currently on a bulk. Suddenly, you wished you were on a cut. Why did the one time he came this close to you had to be so big and puffy?
"Excuse me?" You found yourself saying, shifting one headphone off your ear. “Can I help you?”
"Did you know?" Daniel asked. He didn't give you a chance to respond. "Of course you fucking did."
Without even thinking, you pulled the red plug your mind had obsessed over and jumped down. The pain was already here so there was no point going through any more than necessary. You looked up at Daniel, panting. He, too, was exhaling a little heavier than normal. Too angry and, judging by the smell of his breath, drunk to be stable.
There was no point lying to him. Aside from the fact that Daniel was emotionally charged (and drunk - and he got super passionate when he was drunk) you knew he would immediately pick up on it. You don't spend three years with someone and not know them like the back of your hand. And, unlike him, you can safely say that you hadn't really changed since 2018. If you lied, he would know.
"I signed a NDA, Daniel." You said simply, walking to your gym bag sat on the red bench. You picked up your bottle to take a sip, your throat dry. You tried to keep yourself calm and not shaky. Do my legs look too big? God, Please don’t let me smell like BO. Your thoughts were still running rampant. Despite the extensive cardio, your body was buzzing from the anxiety of having Daniel so close.
Daniel. To think you had once been so deeply in love with the man stood before you.
"Fuck off." He spat. You recoiled. "No one gives a shit about that."
"I do." You said, trying to keep your voice from growing small. "Sorry I care about my job."
Daniel let out a sardonic laugh. You braced yourself, knowing what was to come. You had experienced this many times before during your fights. "What? Making coffee and fucking washing the dishes? Yeah, great job you got there, babe."
"Don't call me babe." You spat back. "And can you not be a dick for two fucking seconds, Daniel."
You said it. His name. When was the last time you had said it? It made you both take a second to process what was happening, to acknowledge how long it had been since the two of you had actually spoken to one another, how long since you had addressed the other as a human being that actually existed.
In that moment, Daniel finally seemed to lose a bit of anger and, instead, show a glimmer of vulnerability. "I lost my seat. I don't know what I'm going to do."
You looked down at your shoes at show of helplessness. New Balance 350s. Red and yellow. They had been on sale. You liked them for stable LISS circuits but hated the colour way. Now, they were the most interesting thing to look at.
Everyone knew that Daniel Ricciardo was always all smiles and that, no matter what, he was optimistic. Happy. He never showed any weakness.
Except, you had seen him when the smiles fell away and the laughter died. In the safety of your private hotel rooms and Daniel could just be, you saw him vulnerable, you saw him hurt, you saw him stress, worry, cry, swear and be open to how he was really feeling. Like right now.
“Daniel I—“
"You didn’t even think to fucking tell me."
You looked up at the change of tone and how he was frowning-- no, sneering at you. This made you change and any remorse, any pity, you felt for the man in front of you immediately vanished. You weren’t in a hotel room. You were in the gym. And it had been five fucking years.
"Are you fucking blaming me right now?"You snapped back. "What the fuck do I owe you, exactly?"
"I’m the reason you’re here!"
By now, your heart was racing. And not from the exercise. This, this was it. You finally had your moment to say it.
"Yes, exactly, Daniel. You’re the reason that I am, as you said, making coffee and fucking washing the dishes! If it weren’t for you, we both know where I would be right now. But you got fucking scared of Max and blamed me for it!"
This hit a nerve. "I was not scared of Max! I outperformed Max!"
"Yes, on the weeks I fucking trained you!"
"Fuck me,” Daniel was shooting straight daggers at you despite the wry grin on his face, “do you really think that was all you?" 
You put your hands on your hips and squared up to meet his eyes, narrowing your own. "Considering how your teammate took me on as a trainer and then became the number 1 driver, yes, I will take some fucking credit for that." Daniel's face dropped when you said it. And you knew it was a low blow, but you couldn't help the words before they tumbled out from your mouth. "The world’s fucking moved on from Monaco 2018. Maybe you should too."
"Fuck you!" He shouted.
"Fuck you!" You shouted back. You grabbed your phone and found yourself tapping onto a recent chat and speedily composing a text. You hated how your fingers shook. You also hated how you were texting for help.
"Well, clearly you haven’t moved on from Monaco if you’re bringing it up." Daniel said, no longer shouting, but his tone still as icily. "You’re going to be mad about that until the end of time?"
You closed your eyes and willed your eyes not to think of the image of him with her, the pain you felt walking in and seeing that. Instead, you opened your eyes and stared him dead in the eye and spoke as calmly as possible.
"Jos Verstappen will be coming to the races more often this year. That means I won't be able to work in the Red Bull garage. If I'm at AlphaTauri, do not fucking come."
Daniel ignored this, undeterred. Instead, he kept grinning down at you thinking he found something. "You seriously aren't over it, are you?"
"No, the memory of you putting your dick into another woman still keeps me up at night." You rolled your eyes despite how it still did admittedly hurt. You pretended it didn’t and hoped he believed it. "Please stop thinking so highly of yourself. Remind yourself of why you're here, right now, talking to me."
Daniel's eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth to say something but the sound of the doors opening had him closing it. You grabbed your gym bag and finally made a move to turn around and escape the gym.
Ignoring the looks of one very confused Carlos Sainz as you breezed past him.
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"I have to go deal with idiots who can’t tell me what’s wrong with the engine." Guenther said. You had brought forth two plates and slide two pizzas onto each.
"Here. For you and Nico." You said, knowing Nico would join the meeting about his car. "I'll bring a tray in a little bit for the rest of the engineers."
"Make me and Nico some coffee, please." Guenther said, taking the plates. "And pour in some fucking whiskey." You laughed and watched him disappear down the hallway of the offices set up. Haas' lack of financial support meant their motorhome was mediocre at best. Still, you loved being here more than anywhere else. It was the safest, really.
Wiping your hands on the towel, you went outside to where the coffee cart was situated. Another example of Haas' lack of funding was needing a Formula One coffee cart and not having an in house machine like everyone else did. You went about preparing the coffees like how you knew Nico and Guenther liked - as well as making yourself one while you were at it.
"No Real Madrid today?"
You found yourself jumping at the familiar Spanish lilt of the other Ferrari driver. Carlos Sainz was someone you never really paid any close attention to. He wasn't close enough to either Daniel or Charles' circles to ever have been on your radar. He had left Red Bull before you did and since he was Ferrari associated, it meant you never really had much to do with him.
Still, he was pleasant and nice. He always had been. He was one of those drivers that if word had spread to him - and it was very likely that it had - he didn't show it. Or care enough about it. Any time Carlos saw you around the Paddock, it was with a warm smile and a quick small-talk question about your thoughts on Real Madrid's latest match. But that was really ever it.
Until that time he had walked in at 5am to see you and Daniel Ricciardo screaming at each other.
"Uh, no. Liverpool was playing yesterday." You said, wondering if he knew you also cared about the Scouse team. Admittedly, you didn’t have the same love for them as you did for the Spanish legends, but you couldn’t have Egyptian heritage and not care about Mo Salah.
"You're Egyptian, no?" He asked. You focused on frothing the milk, unable to really look him in the eyes so soon after this morning.
"Yes." It was there in the mix, yes, but you really weren't up for explaining the complicated heritage of your ethnicity this morning. Looking at the milk circling in the silver jug, you realised your face was heating up. You were slightly surprised he even knew you were Egyptian in the first place. Unlike with Guenther or the splattering of other football fans in the Paddock, you and Carlos only ever had brief snapshots of Real Madrid small talk.
Still, this wasn't an odd conversation, you had to remind yourself. You were talking about the one thing you and him ever talked about. But, again, this was after Carlos had walked in to see you, a Hospitality worker, arguing with a driver.
"Please don't tell anyone about me being in the gym." You finally said, turning off the frother to gently tap the metal jar against the bench and settle the bubbles in the milk. "I could get into a lot of trouble since it's only for drivers."
Carlos waved a dismissive hand and shook his head. When it was clear he wasn't going to, you breathed a small sigh of relief. But then he leaned against the cart and you felt yourself starting to get anxious again. There was a quiet moment for a second as your poured the latte for Nico. Carlos' eyes followed your hands.
"I will say something if Ricciardo upset you." He said in a quieter voice.
You immediately shook your head and finally looked him in the eye. "Please don't. There's enough complication with... everything." You finished lamely.
"So I've heard." Carlos said.
You looked away. He knew.
"So then you'll know I don't need anymore complications." You said through gritted teeth, hating very much the confirmation that word had spread about what had happened.
"You haven't done anything wrong, though."
This caught you by surprise. It was the first time anyone - or, at least, a driver - had said those words to you. At the start, everyone had immediately pointed fingers at you. You were shunned and blamed. Some saw your position with the Formula One Group as part of Hospitality too light a punishment for what had happened. For the longest time, it was the confusion as to why everyone had reacted that way that did that hurt you. You hadn’t thought you had done anything wrong. Not really. You struggled to understand why no one else saw it that way. Least of all any of the drivers that knew what had happened.
Hearing Carlos say that really threw you for a short second. Carlos even caught it. He said your name and you finally looked up at him when you heard him say your name.
"Sorry it’s just - uh, Carlos, man.” You laughed a dry laugh. “You're probably the only driver who thinks so."
"I'm not." Carlos crossed his arms. "I might be the only one who has said so, but if I've understood correctly... then I'm not."
You looked down at metal jug in your hand with the extra milk you had frothed for yourself. Suddenly, you didn't feel like any caffeine. Your anxiety was already through the roof.
"Do you want a coffee?" You asked, sounding, again, very lame as that was your response to Carlos' comment.
The Spaniard looked back down at the spoon and jug in your hands. He nodded. "Have you had one already?" You asked. He shook his head and so you went about pulling down another paper cup to make his piccolo.
"You remembered." He said, laughing slightly.
"First coffee is a piccolo. Second and third are black." You recalled his order. Carlos smiled at you as you poured the milk. "I know everyone's coffee orders."
You didn’t catch how his smile lessened slightly at that.
You looked back at him and tried to ignore the thought of whether his kindness was exaggerated for your sake. A pity thing or something. Carlos accepted the coffee and then he actually offered a thank you in Arabic. You found your lips turning up hearing the marhaba on his Spanish tongue. “Es un placer.” You came back with his own native language.
You don’t work in Formula 1 without picking up a few things here and there.
Hence how you could recognise the German swears that sounded from within the motorhome as Guenther suddenly appeared.
“Where is that Y/N? Liverpool fucking tops the league and thinks she can take her time with— ah, you Ferrari fuckers!” Both you and Carlos looked to where he had come up behind the driver and slapped a friendly pat on his back. “Tell Fred he can’t have any pizza.”
“Pizza?” Carlos asked and looked down at you. “You made your pizza?”
You didn’t get a chance to respond before some Haas engineers appeared behind Guenther and called for you and him. Carlos took this as his sign - he was technically on Haas territory - and nodded at you and Guenther, holding up his piccolo in salute. Guenther had already taken the coffees you’d made for him and Nico and disappeared behind the sliding doors. You made a move to follow when Carlos called out.
"I want to try some famous Y/N pizza!” He said, turning on his heel as he walked backwards and called out to you.
You smiled and shook your head, walking back into the Haas home. You went back to the oven and set about plating up the pizzas to be a little more presentable to them. You also made sure to put some aside especially for Kevin. This was supposed to be for him.
You thought idly of saving some for Carlos when some Haas engineers you vaguely recognised walked past.
"Oh nice!" One engineer said, coming up and immediately reaching for one to stick it in his mouth. You watched him do the same blunder that Guenther did.
The other engineer, a woman with a thick Irish accent? was staring at you. Smug. "Damn, who got you smiling like that, missy?"
"What?" You asked, eyes going wide. You hadn't realised the wide smile on your face that was likely the direct result of one Carlo Sainz. Your face became hot again and it took every ounce of will to not seem affected by her words. “No one.”
"Mmm. If you say so.” She said in a sing song voice. “Well and me Mr Cool over here,” she gestured to the the other engineer trying to breathe through the hot pizza, “are heading to the garage now to see Kevin. Can we take them?"
"Yeah." You nodded. "Go ahead."
"Not saving some for anyone?"
"No." You shook your head firmly. "Take them all."
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AITA for being condescending towards an asexual kid in GSA?
🙃🏳️‍🌈 to find later
Long post so buckle up.
I (17, they/it/he) am one of three co-leaders of my school’s GSA, along with R (18, she/her) and N (17, he/him). All three of us are openly bi, and I’m also openly trans and (most importantly) very loudly aromantic. We’re all in 12th grade now but we were leaders last year (in 11th grade) too. The school/GSA is small enough that all four grades (9–12, so around 13–18 years old) are in the same GSA, there’s no separate upper grade and lower grade groups. We also have two advisors, both cis queer teachers; and some younger queer faculty members also join sometimes for formal events. We take turns running events during club time, such as fun crafts or watching music videos. Sometimes we also do educational stuff or documentaries, including having teachers come in to facilitate discussions.
I’ve been planning (since early December) to run a two part series of discussions about asexuality and aromanticism (separate discussions of each). I really just wanted to do one day about aromanticism, but R said that if I did that, people would derail it and just talk about asexuality anyways, which both N and our advisors also agreed made sense. So, it’s two days, and the asexuality one is first so that the aromanticism one can be closer to Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week (ASAW).
There’s a girl in GSA, let’s call her A (16, she/her), who’s in 11th grade. She’s very socially awkward and if someone points out that she’s accidentally said something rude or offensive she’ll make a big deal out of not knowing and generally derail the conversation. Also, two years ago A made a ton of “jokes” about me and my little sibling (16MtF) being “secretly dating.” When I asked her (politely at first) to stop, she said she was just joking around, and kept doing it. I asked her again and also asked the theatre teacher and school counselor for help, and eventually she did stop. But A kept following me around and trying to be friends with me, and I was super uncomfortable to the point that I asked the school counselor to facilitate a conversation between A and I so that I could ask her to fucking stop. It somewhat worked. Now she still keeps trying to start conversations with me in the hallways and such, but I just brush her off or ignore her.
The one place I can’t do that is during GSA. Since I’m a leader, I have to be civil to everyone and actually talk to people (R, N, and I set norms at the start of the year during our planning meetings). A is asexual but not aromantic, and today she showed up like 5 minutes into lunch (cafeteria lines are annoying) and loudly asked if she was late. We weren’t doing anything in GSA today, just chilling. At some point during the meeting I announced casually that next week we’d be discussing asexuality, and then the week after that we’d talk about aromanticism, which leads nicely into ASAW during February break. When I said this, A immediately said that she would be extra ace that week [during ASAW]. I was like, “during aromantic spectrum awareness week?!?!” in the same tone of that “during pride month?!?!” meme. She looked like someone had just given her an F on the most important test of the year and said she hadn’t known.
I also made a comment about how there’s way more openly aspec people at our school than at most schools, and N said that maybe the presence of role models is part of that (clear subtext: he was referring to me). I said pretty loudly (more people could hear) that it was kinda funny that I’m the “ace role model” when I’m literally not asexual. A looked super lost and confused at this, and I think she might’ve thought I was ace, even though I’m super open about not being ace, and have told her directly more than once.
Here’s where the potential assholery comes into play. There’s an ad for PrEP that was fairly common on the back covers of theatre playbills in the past year. The ad shows a Black man dressed in ripped leggings with fishnets, shiny knee-length heeled leather boots, and some sort of white leather harness, doing a bridge pose with one leg extended upwards so that the “r” in PrEP is resting on the sole of the boot. The ad has a bright red background and text that says “you cast of PrEP options is changing” along with a small QR code and website link. The pose is somewhat provocative, but not out of place on a playbill for an all-ages show.
During GSA, A was saying that she thought the ad was bad, because of the leather being “fetish gear” and “weird” (basically the same arguments people use to say that gay people shouldn’t be allowed in public). I told A that there’s nothing wrong with someone wearing leather, and she said that “it’s fetish gear and that’s disgusting and degenerate and just bad advertising!”
I explained calmly, like I would to a child (although I probably wouldn’t talk about this topic with a child), that PrEP is a medicine that people take if they anticipate having sex with someone who’s HIV-positive, so it’s okay that the ad is somewhat suggestive. She seemed to accept that, but still said that the leather was weird, and the ad should’ve shown “a diverse group of people getting pills at a pharmacy” instead, because “fetish gear” was too much.
I asked if she thought that all leather clothing was inherently fetishistic, to which A said yes, and then I asked, “do you know that people can’t just choose fetishes?”
She hadn’t known that, but she still said the ad was too sexual. I pointed out that it was a fairly well-targeted advertisement, using theatre references, but maybe A was not part of the target demographic. I also said that sometimes outfits are just hot without there needing to be any fetishes involved, which she didn’t refute, and that even if it was a fetish, that wouldn’t make it inherently “bad” or “degenerate” at all.
A said that she still didn’t like it, and I told her that she was entitled to have whatever feelings she wanted to have, but that doesn’t mean the advertisement itself is a problem.
Another person (17, he/him) called out “[OP], what do you think about kink at pride?” in a sort of nonchalant way, so I walked over while saying “i’m pro–kink at pride.” The conversation eventually moved in other directions, and then club ended and we had to go to our next classes.
TL;DR: given my position of power and responsibility as a GSA leader, AITA for being kinda condescending towards an ace person who’s 2 years younger than me because she was being very sex-negative about an ad for PrEP?
What are these acronyms?
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asteriismos · 2 years
Text
cherry waves - ben hargreeves
PAIRING ◆ sparrow!ben hargreeves x umbrella!reader
WARNING(S) ◆ SMUT, rough sex, choking, DIRTY TALK, unedited, piv sex, unprotected sex, fingering, oral (fem receiving), byeLOL
SUMMARY ◆ you come to terms with the new ben.
WORDS ◆ 4.6k
NOTE ◆ … lolllllll!!!!!!! there's no ben smut out there so (insert thanos meme) fine, i'll do it myself.
The Ben that you had fallen in love with when you were younger has been dead for almost fifteen years . . . you had to keep telling yourself that. Getting over his death was one of the hardest things that you had ever done, because his loss was the first one that you had ever experienced at the ripe age of seventeen years old. You weren’t even an adult and yet, you were faced with the tragedy of your first love being killed and you had to face that realization every day for the rest of your life. You remembered the day like it was yesterday, and although it had been over a decade since it happened, there were some times where you would wake up in the middle of the night, sweat covering your entire body and gasping for air because of the nightmares you endured. You weren’t there to witness his death, but the tragedy was all the same. In your nightmares he was ripped away from you without a goodbye. 
You finally started to forget about the trauma when you were in Dallas, as there seemed to be no way to get back to the future and for the life that you had back in 2019. You even met some other people, though nothing came to fruition like your relationship with Ben did. With him it felt so natural to be in love and with everyone else you felt like you were going through the motions. Instead you grew your relationships with your friends and that managed to take your mind off of him. 
And you thought that this mess was done once you made it back to 2019. Everything seemed fine until you and The Umbrella Academy came face to face with Reginald, who was explaining that your home wasn’t your home anymore . . . or it never was. You were confused as hell on what had happened due to time travel. Noises were heard from the top of the balcony and you and your family turned around, revealing a whole set of other people just like you and some weird floating cube. 
And just as you thought things couldn’t get any more weird, you heard footsteps to your left and saw none other than Ben Hargreeves, more alive than you could remember him being. 
Dad, who the hell are these assholes?
That voice was still ringing in your head as clear as day, because to be honest, you couldn’t remember much from the encounter. You took one look at your deceased past lover who was no longer dead and started to shake, the familiar feeling of being hopeless came back to you and you passed out. Five would later tell you that he caught you and was able to get you out of the house before people started to fight, and it wasn’t until five hours later that you woke up. In this timeline, he’s still alive, Y/N, He would say to you when you finally came to, in some hotel room that your family booked. He’s not the same Ben that you fell in love with. He’s different.
And for a few hours you believed that, you tried to join your family in getting on with their lives and planning for their future, but you couldn’t get your mind off of Ben. Because in a way, he was the same person that you fell in love with. Your curiosity got the best of you and like always, led you to do some questionable things – because why would life ever be simple for you?
Your curiosity led you to the doorstep of The Sparrow Academy, knocking on the door and waiting for someone to answer it, not entirely sure that what you were doing is what you should actually be doing. You heard that there was a fight here and although you didn’t get too much information from your siblings, you were sure that there was still bad blood between the two families. The person to answer the door was a brunette woman, who stood a little bit taller than you and gave you a soft smile, turning to look behind and closed the door behind herself, coming out onto the sidewalk with you. She looked a little nervous that you were here, but didn’t look like she had any ill will against you. 
“You’re the one that passed out. I’m Sloane.” 
Great. You’re glad that was the reputation they all had of you. How embarrassing. 
“I don’t normally do that,” You said. “There’s just someone here that reminds me of someone I used to know.”
Sloane looked confused for a second, her features scrunching up in thought before they softened, as if she realized who you were talking about. “Ben said something about your family giving him weird looks. And you passed out right after you saw him . . . How do you know him?” 
“Ben was . . . Well, Ben was in our timeline too. I knew him from then but he died almost fifteen years ago. It was . . .” You trailed off, not knowing the right words to use. You were notorious for never talking about it, which was not good for your healing as you’ve heard, but it was always too painful to think about. “It was traumatic for all of us.” 
“You loved him.” 
Was it that easy to see? Maybe what gave it away was your pained expression at the mere thought of his death, or that you could barely say his name above a whisper. The more you stood in front of her the more you wanted to run away, thinking that this was a bad decision and that you should’ve listened to your family and stayed the hell away from here. But you couldn’t just leave now, and soon enough Sloane was inviting you in and telling you which door led to Ben’s room, and soon enough you were knocking on the door. 
You heard a groan, and a small come in and for a moment you hesitated, thinking that you would be saddened by the fact that the new Ben wasn’t the same one. But you just needed to see him, even if it was just for a moment. You opened the door and closed it, coming face to face with someone who looked the same as your lover, smelled the same as your lover, and even stood the same as him too, but it wasn’t him. It was someone else. 
“Did you come in to discuss something about your family, or are you just trying to get your hands on one of us since you didn’t get a piece of the action earlier?” Ben asked, his tone condescending and nothing like how you remembered it being. “As I recall, your little twitchy brother zapped you out of the house before things got exciting.” You shook your head, taking a step back as he took a step forward. You were silent, still eyes wide at the sight of him. The only thing that was different about his appearance was the visible scar on his face and the slightly tight fitting shirts that Ben never wore before. 
You opened your mouth to say, “I just wanted to see if it was really you.” 
“What do you mean, really me?” He asked. 
“It’s a long story. But the Ben that I knew died so long ago, and I loved him so much. Seeing you down there earlier today just brought all of it back. I never thought that I would see you again . . . But it’s not you. Or at least the one that I knew from my timeline,” You explained. 
“You were in love with me?” He asked. It was a strange concept to him. No one had ever loved him, not enough to pass out due to the thought of him, not enough to risk their life to come to his doorstep after their whole family had engaged in a fight that almost killed them. You were gorgeous enough as it is, and now you were telling him that you loved him. In some ways that made him feel a twinge of emotion towards you, and it made him extend his hand out forward. You flinched for a moment at his touch, but allowed it once you felt his fingertips on your arm. Closing your eyes, for a moment it felt like you were seventeen again and Ben was still here. 
And you opened your eyes and Ben was there, those eyes that you remembered. 
“Did he feel like this?” Ben asked you, his hand not leaving your arm. You nodded, reaching and grabbing the hand with your own. Just like how it used to be. Ben didn’t know why he was doing this, but it felt as if something in the universe was telling him to do it, like it was right somehow. Like you and him were meant to get together. It was all happening so fast. 
In a moment of either pure hope or total idiocy, you stood on your tippy toes and kissed him. It was a short kiss, similar to the ones you two had shared before in your past. Clumsy even, noses brushing against one another as you pulled away a tiny bit to get a look at him. His eyes met yours and he leaned in again, not testing the waters like you had. He knew what he wanted and you were shamelessly going to give it to him, no questions asked. Ben’s hands reached down to the small of your back, pulling you into him and not letting go.
The kiss was greedy, taking all that you could of one another, you still standing on your tippy toes and steering out of balance when your chest hit his own. He kept you up though, your legs turning into jelly when he released his lips from your own and indulged in the crook of your neck. It was hot and sloppy, swollen lips trailing from your neck to your jaw and down the other side, a row of saliva glistening on your skin. Your body shuddered, he made you feel weak in his hands and all you wanted to do was fall down but he didn’t let you. Instead his hands kept you firmly, head dipping down further along your collarbone and squatting down, placing them on the backs of your thighs, nudging.
Realizing what he wanted, you were quick to obey, jumping into his arms and wrapping your legs around his waist. Ben’s strong arms held you with no problems, hoisting you up so your head was now level with his own. You took the opportunity to press your lips against his own again, hands finding their place on his jawline, kissing with a passion you had never used before with anyone else. His hands pulled you down and he grinded against you, making you moan into his mouth, Ben’s tongue sliding past your parted lips and exploring your mouth.
He began to walk backwards, steadily so as to not trip. And the moment his calves hit the bed, he sat down, taking you with him so you were now straddling his thighs. You were becoming aware of the heat between you two, every shuddering breath that left his lips egged you on further, wanting to make him writhe and moan your name over and over again. The need for him was deeper than you had ever felt before, and you didn’t want to hold back anymore, you wouldn’t let yourself run away from this. It was like he had never left. 
There was a small knock on the door and it threw you off your groove, head snapping to the large door. Ben placed a hand on your side to steady you. “Who is it?” He asked, voice wavering a tiny bit at the interruption, hoping the person wouldn’t come in.
“Did you want to train tonight or tomorrow morning?” It was his sister Fei.
A sigh left Ben’s lips. “Tomorrow morning.” There was a muted reply that neither of you could hear, and another moment passed and you knew that she was gone.
“That was close-”
“Ben,” You breathed, not in the mood for small talk. You were still sitting on his thighs and you needed him more than ever now. “Stop talking.” A sly smile came across his lips and you wiped it away with a kiss, going back to the fast pace that had been set before. Your hands came and went under his shirt, feeling the taut skin of his abs and thanking God for his training and conditioning. He was considerably larger and muscular than when you had known him. The thought of him above you with a body like that? It made you falter in your movements.
Using the break in your concentration to his advantage, Ben started mouthing along your skin again, hands pulling up your shirt above your head. His eyes scanned your body, raising an eyebrow. “No bra?” He asked, making you shy away and look anywhere but at his face. You didn’t reply, but he seemed to not like that. His hand came and grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him. You gave a small smile, “Well I didn’t know that this was happening and I wanted to be comfy.” He hummed, somewhat disappointed in your answer but not disappointed at how compliant you seemed to be with him. Ben went back to kissing your neck, teeth grazing along your soft skin, making you jump whenever he bit down on a particular spot.
You were beginning to grow impatient. Perhaps it was with the way that he was worshiping you, wanting to kiss every single inch of you and make you keel into his touch over and over again. Or maybe it was because no one had ever made you feel this way before. You had been with others before, men whose names you didn’t bother remembering, all men who resembled the one below you now. Men, with blue eyes that you pretended were his, strong arms that felt like the ones that Ben wrapped around you before you said goodbye to him for what you didn’t know would be the last time. They never made you satisfied, and you were left feeling more broken than put together after the deed was done, scrambling to leave in the middle of the night to avoid the awkward conversation that would follow in the morning. Ben, even though he was only kissing you, put those men to shame. You wondered if he was thinking the same, that no woman measured up to you.
He definitely was.
Ben’s hands found your breasts, squeezing them and kneading them together, fingers coming to pinch your nipples. Your back arched into him and you almost fell over on top of him, using your hands on his muscles to stop you. You reached and decided you wanted to please him, to show him how much you wanted him. You trailed your hands under his shirt and came to the band of his pants, pushing your fingers past it and making your way down. Before you could hit his obvious hard on, one of his own hands came and grasped your wrists, pulling your hand away. You looked up, thinking that you did something wrong. Tilting your head, you gave him a silent what?
“I’m not done with you yet,” Ben explained. In one movement he put his hands to your back and flipped you two over, him now on top of you. Your head hit the mattress with a small humph and wondered what he had in store for you.
You worked with him to shimmy your pants and panties off, throwing them to some side of the room. His hands splayed against your thighs and you watched with an open mouth to see what he was going to do. He gave you a look, a familiar one that reminded you that you were actually here with him, not someone who looked and acted like him. It was actually Ben. The one that you still loved, the one that you trusted more than anyone in the world.
You were also well aware of the slick that was beginning to coat your thighs, body betraying you and showing him how much you wanted him, how you ached for him. Ben seemed to like it though, bringing his flesh hand to your slit and scooping some of it up. When he brought his hand back up, you could see the way that it glistened on his skin, popping a finger into his mouth and humming sinfully at the taste. He did it again and again, humming every single time your arousal hit his tongue. You looked down with heated cheeks, feeling a little embarrassed that you were getting so worked up over something so small. “You taste …” He trailed off, bringing his tongue to your folds and swiping up from your hole to your clit. “Amazing.”
“It’s all for you,” You said, wiggling your hips and urging him to pleasure you again. Ben smirked, feeling a sense of pride wash over him at your words. He brought a finger to you and pushed it in, watching your mouth open into a wide ‘O’ at the feeling. He curled it up, making your muscles tighten around him. Ben built a steady pace and he came back up to your face, pressing a kiss to your cheek sweetly as if he couldn’t hear the lewd sounds that were being created when he added a second finger in.
“Did he make you feel like this,” He asked, towering over you. His thumb rubbed against your clit while his fingers fucked into you. “Were you ever under me like this?”
You moaned out at his words, thighs clenching around his hand to keep him there. You couldn’t respond, too busy thinking about the steady fire that was building in you. You reached to climb higher, hoping he would grant you some kind of release. He didn’t give it to you though. Instead, whenever you were getting to that tipping point, he would stop all of his movements altogether until you stopped shaking, then repeat the process over and over again.
It was making you go crazy, how he had the power to push you towards release but he just wouldn’t do it.
“Tell me, when you were with other guys to forget, did they make you feel this good?” Ben whispered into your ear, biting the skin below it. “Did they make you shake under their fingertips?”
So that’s what it was. Jealousy. Ben was jealous of all the men that had been with you before him. How someone else had heard your first moans, been inside you, made you cum before he ever had the chance to. He was determined to make sure that he was better than them, and make sure that you would never go to anyone else again.
“Answer me.”
You opened your mouth to speak but you couldn’t. As if to test you further, he pushed a third finger into you, making you moan out his name loud and roll your eyes to the back of your skull. His thumb kept rubbing languid circles on your clit. You thought if you stayed quiet you could sneak an orgasm, cut him off guard. But as if he heard your thoughts, his movements stalled and he put his other hand firmly on your hips so you couldn’t even move against his statue-like hand. His dark eyes bore into your own and you squeezed around his fingers. “No, they weren’t anything like you. You make me feel so good, Ben.” The praise fell from your lips with ease, lava pooling in your stomach as if threatening to burst at any moment. If only he would just rub a little bit more …
He pulled his hand away from you. Ben didn’t even respond to your statement and you wondered if you said something wrong, if he had enough. And he had enough all right, but not enough of you. He wanted to see you cum, just around his cock and not his fingers.
But you couldn’t hear what he was thinking, which made you whimper when he pulled himself away fully, standing at the edge of the bed. You opened your legs up to him, the farthest that you could go without hurting yourself and hoping that it would make him come back to you quickly. Your clit was aching from several denied orgasms, almost thinking about pulling your hand down to finish yourself off, though deciding against it when knowing Ben would never allow something like that. He liked seeing you writhing like this.
Ben’s hands shed all his clothing. He wasn’t exactly putting on a show for you but you marveled anyways, watching the way that his muscles flexed when his shirt came off and how you wanted to lick all around his abdominal region and make your way all down to his cock, which was pressed against his stomach and slightly glistening with precum. It was big, probably the biggest you’ve ever had and felt your insides clench just thinking about it sliding into you. Once he was satisfied with his clothing off, he came back down to the bed and kneeled between your spread legs.
“Ben,” You whispered. “Please.”
“Please what?” There was a hint of mischief in his eyes and it took all of your strength to not roll your eyes. “What do you want me to do to you?” Of course he wanted to hear you say it, to announce what he was inevitably going to do.
You couldn’t ignore the way you loved how controlling he was with you, how he ordered you to do some things. And as much as you hated that he didn’t let you cum, you also loved how he would make you cum when he wanted you to, not you.
He took his cock into his hands and rubbed the tip against your glistening folds, teasing you in the most sinful way possible.
“Please … Fuck me Ben. Make me cum, I can’t take it anymore.” You just wanted him inside of you so badly, you were going to scream if this went on for any longer. He was right there, denying you both the pleasure.
With a nod of his head, he pushed into you in one fluid motion. The feeling of him bottoming out inside of you made you grip onto his bicep, pulling him close so his warm chest was against your own again. He wasted no time moving, the sound of it deliciously sweet in your ears. Ben took your legs and pushed them upwards, your feet hanging off of his shoulders and pressing your thighs further up until they were almost hitting the mattress. The change in position had you crying out, feeling him hit deeper inside of you.
You could feel every single scrape of his cock against your walls, increasing that fire in your stomach until you were sure you were about to cum. His pace was unrelenting, moving quicker and quicker until you were sure he was using all his power. He kept at it with such loyalty and vigor, his motivation to make you feel the best you ever had fuelling him to a tenfold. He was such a devoted man to begin with, so you should’ve known that he would handle things the same way in bed.
You squeezed around him. “Please,” You whimpered.
“Go ahead.” Those two words were all you needed, allowing yourself to scream out as your orgasm ripped through you, built up again and again and now it was finally here and it was amazing. It rippled through you like shockwaves, and made you go limp under him, legs completely boneless. Ben didn’t let up as he rode through your orgasm, keeping the same pace with you. He was unforgiving, not giving you time to adjust and instantly making you feel the feeling of overstimulation. You were so sensitive to his cock ramming in and out of you that you could feel a second orgasm already building up.
The tip of him hit a particularly nice spot in you and you yelled, curling your toes and your hands came to tangle and grip in his hair. You almost stopped for a moment thinking that you were hurting him, but when you looked at his face, you saw only fucked out bliss, white incisors showing in a ravenous grin. His eyes opened and they were almost fully dark, making you shiver.
You opened your mouth to speak but was halted by two of his fingers shoving their way into your mouth. It was harsh, but in a good way, your insides burning up as your second orgasm washed over you, sucking on his two fingers as they made your moans muffled.
“You feel so good. You’re so fucking tight,” He mumbled, as though he was talking to himself. He was completely thrown into the pleasure that you were giving him, hot and warm and just perfect, like you were made for his cock to be rammed into over and over again. “Made for me, all for me.” He used your past words, them never losing their meaning no matter how many times he muttered under his breath.
Time seemed to slow and grow faster at the same time, the whole room disappearing as both of you focused on only each other. You weren’t sure how many times he had made you cum at this point, you took whatever he gave you and took it well. When you got enough strength to crane your neck down, you watched as your hole enveloped his cock, it coming back out slicked with the remnants of your past orgasms. Ben saw where your eyesight was and a sense of pride washed over him again. “Do you like watching that? Seeing how well you take me?” He asked, egging you on. His hand went to grab your own and placed it on your lower abdomen, and you could feel the skin slightly raising up every time he went into you. You could see it too, sliding in and out.
Though, even if he didn’t want to admit it to himself, his movements were beginning to falter. He was becoming more sloppy with his hips and you knew he was about to cum. So, to give him what he had worked for, you wiggled your hips up, matching his hips. Your oversensitive clit rubbed against the base of his cock and you were clenching around him, and as if on cue, you were cumming again, feeling weak under him. Ben wrapped his arms around you and pulled you up, his cock splitting you open until he was spilling inside of you.
The moans that left his mouth were probably the hottest things you had ever felt in your life. You could feel his cum dripping down his cock, coating your thighs and dripping onto the soiled sheets. He put you down on the bed and followed you, eyes watching your own and kissing your sweaty forehead. He finally stopped moving and stilled inside, not wanting to leave you and go back to the way things had been before. He didn’t want to leave this moment and neither did you.
Because both of you knew when you were both cleaned up, you would have to come to terms with what was happening. 
So you stayed there with him, letting his cock stay inside of you and whispering sweet nothings into his ear, words of praise were exchanged. How good he had been, how good you made him feel … Anything that both of you could think of to keep the moment from ending. 
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7thleveldown · 21 days
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Tumblr for Werewolves
So… If stiles existed you KNOW he would have had a Tumblr. In this essay I will…
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Derek walks over to the dining table to pick up his laptop which Stiles had been researching on. Well, research? He's pretty sure this isn't research.
“Stiles, what the hell is this?” Derek gestures to the open webpage on the laptop.
“It's the internet Derek, I know I've explained this to you before.” The smirk from Stiles is so unbelievably arrogant Derek could slap him. But maybe he could have a little fun with this.
“Yes. I am aware,” he says, completely deadpan, “you took great pains with it. Or caused me pain anyway. But I meant this specifically… This… Does not look like pack research. I don't admittedly know what to does look like, but…” he scowled at Stiles 
“What are you…” Stiles muttered as he came back from the kitchen, looking confused, before barking out a laugh. “Nah, man, that's just Tumblr, I was taking a little break from the research to clear my head.”
Derek put on his best (hopefully) confused and grumpy expression at Stiles’ reponse. “But, what… Is it?” Derek saw Peter appear on the sidelines. His ability to pick up on mischief, whether he was creating it or not, was terrifying.
“Dude! Come on! Tumblr? It's probably older than you are!” Stiles laughed and then seeing Derek's face, he pretended to pout. “Aww, did they not have Tumblr for technologically backward werewolves who only want to scowl? Poor sourwolf, you don't know what you've been missing! The fanfiction alone! The memes! The in-jokes!” Stiles was gesticulating more and more wildly, pacing around the room.
“Oh come on Derek, you-” Derek shot Peter a look and a smirk that made Peter falter just a little as he realised what was going on, but not enough for Stiles to notice. “You must remember Tumblr, Laura was always on there.” Derek sent Peter the slightest nod of thanks, and Peter's eyes lit up in glee.
“Laura had Tumblr? Do you know what her username was? We could find it! I could find it, we could see what she…” Stiles trailed off as he realised what he was saying. “You know, I could try, if you wanted me to?” 
Stiles had stopped pacing, his voice softening and his arms wrapped around himself. This had taken a turn Derek had not expected.
“I guess I might be able to remember… Maybe if you explain it to me, because it just seems so…”
Stiles’ face lit up in response. “Course! I mean, we gotta start with bringing you into the 21st Century sometime, or at least the 19th would help, because the whole Heathcliff lurking in shadows thing is kinda old. We need to get you to understand our references!”
“I know who Heathcliff is, if that's any help?” Derek said, trying to sound a little coward and out of his depth. Stiles could be such an ass sometimes, and Derek would get his own back.
“Of course you do, big guy, of course you do.”
So, Derek sits back and makes Stiles try to explain exactly what Tumblr is, in excruciating detail. And then pretends to still not understand it. Peter has had to leave the room several times so he doesn’t burst out in laughter.
“Derek! Come on! This is not that hard! For the love of….” Stiles flounces around the room, getting redder and redder in the face, and even Derek is beginning to break at this.
“Stiles, what was it you were saying about codes? I think I remember something about that…” Peter asks, distracting Stiles’ attention from Derek for a moment.
“Yes! Yep, codes… It's one of those things so people would say a phrase, and it would identify them to other Tumblr users in the real world, but mean nothing to anyone else… it’s um…”
“Stiles, don’t tell me that great brain of yours has forgotten the code? Wasn’t it about liking something?” Peter was not holding back his smirk.
At that moment, in a moment of weakness, Derek replies “I like your shoelaces.” He screws up his face as he realises what he has just said out loud.
“I fucking KNEW IT!” crows Stiles, spinning on the spot to point the finger at Derek. “I will find you in there, you can’t hide from me, there is no getting away from me now, I will find you.”
Derek sighs. Great. “This isn’t Taken, Stiles. Stop trying to channel Liam Neeson.”
The sound that is emitted from Stiles could best be described as a squark. “But you don’t…. But you….” He flails between Derek and Peter, who is laughing so hard he’s struggling to breathe. Stiles spins himself around so much, he ends up making himself dizzy and ends up on the floor with a thump.
Peter stops laughing long enough to glare at Derek. “Did you HAVE to break him? He’s my entertainment!”
Derek raises an eyebrow.
A slurred "I'm okay" is heard from the floor.
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kiwanopie · 2 years
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Top 10 anime men who will lay pipe expeditiously. Haikyuu Edition. *Reupload*
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cw: piv, dirty talk, general adult themes. minors do not interact
Akaashi |Run Time: Within the first month| Not exactly a prude, just believes that being more intuned with your partner is necessary to satisfying sex. Plus he likes the build up between general interest and sexual tension. If we’re being honest, he’s probably been thinking of putting his hands all over you since the second date. But he’s courteous enough to let you know that he actually wants to get to know you first. Likes to call you after work during the talking stage just to ask you about your day. Invites you over on his off days to make sure you’re comfortable around him. But again, he’s been holding himself back for a while. And he’s not too coy for a little phone sex in the meantime. - But, boy does he completely lose it when you crawl into his lap during one of your hangout sessions. Your friends still don’t believe you when you introduce them to the guy that “fucked you within an inch of your life” before you officially started dating.
Iwaizumi |Run Time: Within the first few weeks| He likes to believe that the reason he doesn’t rush it is because he’s “old fashioned” and that he’s mature enough to understand that “it takes time for these kinds of things.” Whole time he’s just busy. Trust me, deep down he knows if he had it his way he’d have you folded over three ways to Sunday after the third date. But he has the physical health of like twelve overgrown toddlers to manage and the team moves around pretty often. So, it’s just quick coffee dates and video calls for a while. But trust me, the moment he has time on his hands you’re done for. I suggest clearing your schedule before you meet up! You’re gonna need some time to recover.
Oikawa |Run Time: Within two weeks| First week down though and you can see it physically hurts him that he’s not fucking you as soon as he wants to. Only reason he’s holding out though is because he actually likes you, so he doesn’t want you to think that’s the only thing he’s seeking out. - But you know that meme of that guy who looks like he’s this 🤏 close to having a stroke with all those veins on his face? Yeah. Soon as he knows you’re on the same page though he’s slutting himself out to you like his life depends on it. And he talks the nastiest shit. Will tell you everything he’s been wanting to do to you and then show you in frankly exemplary detail.
Hinata |Run Time: Within a week| To his credit, he’s the most unafraid to let you know how smitten he is with you from the jump. Gave you your phone back after putting his number in with his info under “Shoyo 💕❤️” and told you to call him if you’re looking for someone to treat you right. Literally told you the night you actually hooked up that you were only doing missionary to start off, and when you asked why he replied that you were “Too pretty to fuck in anything but,” With all the sweet talk he uses in the week leading up, you’re not wrong for being completely out of your depth when he fucks you like he hates your guts. But don’t worry, the love’s still there! You’re even prettier when he’s fucked the brains outta you <3
Kuroo |Run Time: Within the first couple of dates| Class traitor often forgets the line between courting a significant other and a sugar baby. Thought the best way to charm your pants off was to buy out the restaurant you’d have your first date at and surprise you with a birkin bag. Isn’t ashamed to let you know he gets off on watching you spend his money and when he’s booking a pent-suite for your third date it takes a very necessary pause during dinner to establish that 1.) Yes, he wants to be your boyfriend. No, he didn’t know that this wasn't the right way to do it. And 2.) He’s only been spending this much money because it’s the only thing stopping him from cumming in his pants the moment he gets within a foot of you. Weird guy. Rearranges your guts like no one’s business.
Bokuto |Run Time: The date after the first| He tries…so hard to hold out, he really does! It’s just god you’re so fucking sexy. Everything you do has his brain short circuiting and he’s starting to want you so bad that it’s making him itch. Your thighs are so squishy and your lips look so plump. Everything about you looks soft to the touch and since meeting you he hasn’t been able to blow a decent load without imagining it’s you squeezing him so tight. Really, the only reason he made it this far is ‘cause first date jitters are a bitch and at the very least he has the decency to let you know he likes you first. - But then you show up in this cute little dress that keeps riding up your thighs when you walk, and the way you pout as you try to pull it down has his head feeling all fuzzy. He tries to stay cordial as he opens the door for you to slide into his car, but the way you smile up at him as he closes it behind you has his resolve breaking into pieces. Lucky for him you’re perceptive enough to notice the literal dick print in his pants the moment he climbs in; and he lights up like a Christmas tree when you suggest a quickie before dinner. Spoiler alert: It won’t be a quickie. Get your refund back on that reservation, sis.
Atsumu |Run Time: The first date| You can’t blame the guy for being shamelessly attracted to you, can you? Who cares about old fashioned courting! It ain’t worth the money if you ain’t walking funny? - All jokes aside though, he’s a firm believer in if two consenting adults like each other enough, they should be able to fuck whenever and however they want. Doesn’t find you any less respectable for letting him put your legs behind your ears on the first date. Although that was after he’d already bent you over in his car, folded you over his kitchen counter, and had you leaving drool stains on his hallway area rug. Eh, you’ll plan your next date in the shower - little hard to talk though with your face pressed against the glass.
Matsukawa |Run Time: Scheduled a time and place for you to link before hand| Hey, if you wanna turn this thing into a relationship then he’s up for that too. But he’s not gonna stress himself trying to hold back from fucking your pretty little brains out. Soon as he gets the O.K. he’s picking a time and place and hightailing it over with no stops in between. And he’s not bullshiting when he says he’s gonna fuck you stupid. The guy digs you out like he’s trying to ruin you for anybody else. But it’s not entirely his fault! He gets sick of carrying that meat missle around too 😔
Hanamaki |Run Time: Straight up just asked if you’d let him| Hedonist to the max. And no shame either. The moment he gets the feeling that you might be sexually interested in him, he’s diving in with no goggles. I mean, obviously he cares about your interests and your pursuits in life; might even think you’re nice enough to take home to mom’s one day. But that’s not what his mind’s set on right now. Only thing in his head is if he should start with collapsed doggy or drill you in from the side just to get you drooling for him that much quicker. But hey, dick was so good you forgot he don’t got a job!
Honorable Mentions!
Sakusa (Surprisingly)| Comes off as a prude because he apparently has “High standards.” Can’t admit that if he finds you attractive enough, he’ll just straight up fuck you. |
Terushima |Likes to “Do you like my tongue ring?” Himself into some pussy.|
Sugawara | Plays the part of a good loving school teacher just looking for a companionship. Gives it up as soon as he sees you’re into him.|
Osamu | “m’not a scrub like my brother.” No, baby, you’re a whore.|
And finally number one…
Suna! |Run Time: Text him at 3:00am and he’ll be there by 3:05am| Standing at 6’3.2 and 176lbs, you have caught the affection of a man who truly believes that “a hole is a hole” once he’s found himself physically attracted to someone. That’s not to say that he’s particularly loose with what he’s got but if you’ll take it? Once hiked to your place in the middle of January with basketball shorts on ‘cause you sent him a “U up?” Text in the middle of the night. Woke up the next morning with a fever but god was that pussy worth it. Fucks like he’s trying to prove something so you’re in remission for the next couple of days afterwards. And then will have the nerve to wanna be the little spoon after the fact. - Tries not to look as elated as he is when you finally tie him down but with the way he turns your insides into mush the night following, you can tell he’s pretty excited to finally call himself your boyfriend.
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reblogs are appreciated 💕 ps, tumblr pls suck my balls? 🥺
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afreakingdork · 24 days
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Yeah, I'm not taking this sitting down. Man, I really am not trying to have beef out here, but I refuse to have my good fucking name tarnished. To make a public post about me? Yeah, I'm going to share my side. The facts are as such:
I approached wolf on 12/20/23 about a NSFW commission inspired by one of their works. It would feature my sona and an aged up Donnie. As they mentioned, our initial conversation was good. We went back and forth during the sketch phase and I requested quite a lot of edits. I asked if I could pay them for these corrections.
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it was right after this that wolf asked about Donnie's battle shell since it wasn't illustrated.
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After this message, I did not hear back from wolf after 2/9/24 until I sent them a follow-up message 3/27/24
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I did not hear back from wolf until today 5/6/24.
Now I cannot share the images of the art I received because it is NSFW, but I can tell you that the grey from my sona's body appeared to be missing. The ears of my sona were grey, but the body only looked yellow. Donnie was missing his purple arm marks, and his knee pads were still the same only now they were colored in black along with his mask. From here I will just send the conversation in its entirety.
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For reference, this was the reference sheet they had.
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I was then sent two pieces where the grey on my sona was very obvious and Donnie's markings were now present with the following text.
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Now again, I wish I could show you the pieces, but I can't. I was offered a 50% refund for my troubles, but I was not interested in taking it because wolf had already done all the work.
I will say that I was extremely frustrated with the whole affair so the next part I will admit was a bit salty because while corrections had been made, I wasn't able to give any input so there were still mistakes in my sona's colors (specifically the underside of the tail was yellow instead of white and my grey arm had one side yellow) and Donnie's mask was still black. The following is our last correspondence on my blog.
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This would have been the end of it for me. Except, I did not get the email. I waited in hopes it would come in, but none did. Since I was blocked I was forced to reach out from one of my side blogs @thisgoesouttoyoubaby which feel free to check. it's my reblog sideblog that I use to send my bestie memes. It dates back YEARS and is not used for spam.
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As you can see I was blocked here.
Now I have been refreshing my email feed waiting. I know emails can take time, but I have no way to confirm if I'm getting my work because I was immediately blocked on thisgoesouttoyou with no response.
So I used another sideblog, this time @plowingon which you can again, freely search, its not a spam blog, but a blog I once made to record the live of my old german shepherd I had years ago when he was getting older.
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And wouldn't you know it, I got my first email from wolf at
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Coincidentally, only after I sent my last message to them.
Now I'm not interested in hurting wolf's reputation. I think you should still commission them if you'd like. I still am a fan of their art. I have no ill will, but fuck if I will stand by as someone tells me that I won't pay an artist. I never even said i wouldn't pay. I was just frustrated because they wouldn't follow their own three correction rule. They allowed me no recourse, and then they were petty before I could even confirm that I received the email.
Could I have been nicer?
Of course.
Could I have been more clear?
Absolutely.
But there is no world in which I tried to gaslight anyone. I pride myself on my honesty. I was not shy when paying them. I sent payment before we even began. I offered to pay them more and acknowledged I was a needy customer halfway through. So I apologize for this long post, but I wanted to make sure all of this was visible because how dare you call me a scammer, wolf.
You disappoint me.
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yourlocaltreesimp · 8 months
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*insert And Another One meme*
Can I. Request a yandere chain with a reader who gifts them flowers just because they can? Or like, them just subtly courting the chain for a change? (minus wind, who they just flat out spoils because he's babey even though he's a gremlin)
And when I say court, I mean like in ways that they're probably not familiar with? Like, the reader makes up a bs excuse about needing their help to see if they can still sing because then rusty, and then singing love songs to them but it's in a language they can't recognize?
Or like, doing tasks for them? Basically acts of service, since that's an old way of courting from my country that can be easily mistaken for them being helpful, but they're just generally more careful and going above and beyond what's asked for them?
- altumsomnum (forgot to add it in the other asks lmao)
Ofc, ofc I think I miss understood the prompt, but take this in case!
TW:ok well there’s some obsession and yandere as expected, blood mentione
Oh how the mighty fall
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
You’d recently found yourself in quite the predicament. Not necessarily a bad one… Just, odd. Long letters of prose and poetry sealed with royal blue wax from Warriors carefully dancing around his plans to stab the others and run off with you. Quiet afternoons curled up as Sky plays you music keeping you safe and distracted as the others slit the throat of the merchant that insulted you. Ranting to Four about whatever interest snagged your mind, he’d listen for hours at your every beck and call, no matter if the sentiment wasn’t returned. Strolling around villages with Time, knowing you’re safest at his side though you didn’t know how deep their feelings went, they’d do anything at your order. Twilight teaching you how to ride a horse, sharing what knowledge he knew you’d benefit from but also so you wouldn’t be near the fight. Fresh hot meals and deserts from Wild, with some added ingredients to let you sleep so they deal with business. Reading with Hyrule in a calm clearing, uninterrupted by the others but he knows the more time you spend together, the easier it’ll be when he steals you away. Sparring with Legend, finally free to move and fight as the others do as he gauges your strength to see how hard you can fight back.
You supposed the real question was why? You didn’t do anything odd or particularly of note. In comparison to the other options they had (there were none, as if anyone could pretend they held light to your sheer divinity) you felt dim by comparison. Sure, you wanted their affection (you already had them, so much blood has been spilled in your name, their reason for living is found within your company) but between yourself and the incarnation of a goddess fool to think she’s worthy of comparison you didn’t know what prompted their behaviour. It was only until you caught a passing conversation from a village girl to her friend that you realised your fatal mistake. This wasn’t Earth. Looking back on your behaviours you felt embarrassed. You’d spent hours reading and writing poetry with Warriors when you found his passion in it. You didn’t question the blush on his cheeks when you read his poetry on love- you knew he loved the romance novels. You asked Sky to play his harp when you were doing chores and even got in the habit of singing softly when you found yourself willing. You turned a blind eye to the look of sheer endearment and adoration when you looked up from whatever you busied yourself with. You’d listened to Four go on and on about the Minish after he found their numbers dwindled in the future. He’d cried, you held him, he went on and on about each and every tiny detail of his journey, pouring his heart out in a way that he was only ever used to doing when split. You welcomed him with open arms the next time he asked if you could talk. You ran whatever errands with Time that he asked, knowing his aversion to such large crowds with no company. You thought the silent agreement to stick with one another in busy cities was forged in the mistrust of the environment you found yourself surrounded with, not out of any further attraction. You entertained the idea of learning to ride a horse to get closer with the group, bridge the gap the lay between you. You didn’t catch Twilight as he noted how quickly you caught on, how easily you’d adapt to Ordon, especially with your compassion. You helped Wild with the cooking mainly because you wanted to be useful, but from what you’ve seen, he always managed to make simple tasks entertaining. He, meanwhile, was falling over himself at the fact that someone is willing to help him, let alone out of the goodness of their heart, let alone you who he’d lay down lives for. Reading with Rulie so you could learn a little more about their lives and culture as he saw you preparing to live out the rest of your days in the Hyrules. Asking Leg for help fighting because you knew he’d be the only one who wouldn’t hold back, while he enjoyed being closer with you, having the excuse to finally be near you without any glares. Looking back, you see why they acted as they did.
BONUS:
In long and short, the chain did a lot for you, for your affections. And it really began to bother you that they never accepted anything in return. They never took thanks, for it is what was ‘expected’ of courting, and yet you felt as if there was more to be done. And so, you decided on a plan. You’d simply have to be stubborn. It was rewarding to see blushes tinting their cheeks as they read the letters you’d written for them in turn. Watching their eyes light up as you goth them all jewellery, tokens that they treasured more than anything Hylia had given them. Finding excuses to take them all on dates and seeing their hearts squeeze.
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beewolfwrites · 1 year
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Hear me out… you know that meme of like the dad and the dog that he didn’t want who always end up being super close.. can we get something similar to that with Chishiya and y/n LMAO
btw I love your writing and I’m glad you’re back ♡
Haha, I guess this is the closest way I could replicate it? Enjoy <3
(Chishiya x gn reader)
---------------------------------------------------
‘Please.’
‘No.’
‘Please, Chishiya! There’s plenty of spare hotel rooms.’ This woman, Kuina, was bouncing on her heels now. 
You felt a little awkward being argued over like this, but you also didn’t want to intervene. The relationship between Kuina and this man, Chishiya, wasn’t clear. Whilst you had been forced to collaborate with Kuina in your last game - swinging from chain ropes to avoid the swimming pool of simmering acid below - this was the first game where you had worked with this ‘Chishiya’ person. He wasn’t particularly tall, and his dyed blonde hair was striking against his sly, catlike features. Why Kuina had to ask his permission to take you with them, you couldn’t tell. From the sounds of it, this ‘hideout’ of theirs had a leader who ultimately decided on who stayed or went.
The game itself had been troublesome; a twisted spin on snakes and ladders. The venue was an old brick building with scaffolding covering the entire exterior. The rules seemed simple, too; climb up to the roof to clear the game. What the rules hadn't explained was the exposed electrical wires and venomous snakes. 
You had been climbing just below the other two when Chishiya’s foot slipped on the wet steel. It went against every one of your survival instincts, yet your body moved on its own, freeing one hand to grasp Chishiya, catching him whilst clinging onto the scaffolding with all your strength. His expression was still vivid in your memory, as he clutched your hand. Rather than surprise at what had happened, or relief. He looked puzzled, as if he couldn’t work out why you’d done it. 
Truth be told, you weren’t too sure why yourself. 
‘Strength alone isn’t enough,’ you could hear him murmur. 
Kuina huffed and folded her arms. ‘Speak for yourself. You would have died back there, you know.’ 
‘And?’ 
You grimaced, trying to hide your face in your sleeve. If your presence was this much of an issue, maybe it would be better if you simply went your own way. 
‘Um… hey,’ you mumbled, causing the pair to suddenly look up. ‘It’s obviously a problem, so I’ll just leave. Good luck on your next game.’ 
You began to walk away into the cool evening. The breeze was refreshing after such a physically exhausting game. Their hideout did sound like a great opportunity, but you knew when you weren’t wanted. Behind you, you could hear the two bickering, their voices growing more and more distant with every step you took. 
‘See! Look what you’ve done now.’
‘I don’t see why you care so much, Kuina.’ 
‘Chishiya!’ 
The arguing stopped, but you didn’t bother looking back to find out why. Maybe things were supposed to be like this. You’d arrived in this twisted world alone, so maybe you were supposed to go back alone too. You were thinking carefully about where you should set up camp for the night, when a smooth voice called out from behind. 
‘You.’ 
Slowing, you turned around to see this man, Chishiya, strolling towards you. His hood was drawn over his head, hands in his pockets, and his relaxed demeanour suggested that he had no intention of harm. Yet his eyes were analytical, and you could feel him assessing every move you made. Behind him, Kuina was slowly making her way over. 
‘What cards do you have?’ Chishiya asked. 
Your hand instinctively went to your pocket where you kept your stash. ‘Seven of Spades,’ you said, trying to remember all the games you had cleared. ‘Two of Hearts, Eight of Clubs, Nine of Spades, Ace of Diamonds—’ 
‘Fine.’ 
You hadn’t expected Chishiya to give in all of a sudden. Was it really just down to your cards? Looking at him now, his eyes were glittering with curiosity as he took in your appearance. 
‘That’s it?’ You asked, unsure of what was truly happening here. ‘That’s all you wanted to know?’
‘You’ve got a good range of cards,’ he said. ‘And you’re a skilled Spades player. You could be useful.’  
Kuina’s face cracked into a grin. She pressed her palms together as if her prayers had been granted. ‘Really! Does that mean we can keep them?’ 
Chishiya pulled out a pair of headphones and slid them into his ears. ‘Whatever,’ he muttered. 
The two began to walk back in the direction they had come. At first, you weren’t sure if this was truly happening. Had you really found allies you could rely on? Allies who had food and shelter? Kuina and Chishiya were several metres ahead before the latter turned around, his gaze expectant. 
‘Are you coming or not?’
You nodded, unable to hold back a smile as you took your place by their side. 
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