#the cancer arc is making me emotional again

[the-spooky-alien]

For whatever reasons, I was thinking about how Scully's cancer affected her post-remission. About how tasting blood must make her gag now that she knows what it's like to live with it constantly. About how she must be terrified of learning she's sick again. About how, in the weeks following her remission, she stares at her face in the mirror and wonders when it will hit her again. She can't even cling to science because she doesn't know why she's not dead. She doesn't know what let her live.

Does Mulder stare at her when she falters slightly, when she's tired, when she's pale, with a pit of dread swallowing him whole ? Does Scully's hands shake when her nose bleeds again ? Does she have to chase away a wave of panic when she feels dizzy or when she has a headache ?

She's been so close to death. And it's not like being threatened with a gun or a bomb or whatever she's been threatened with in the past. The cancer was slow but steadfast, taking over her body without her noticing at first. The moment she learned of her diagnosis, she understood she was going to die. She's been facing death for months.

How can you come back from this unscathed ? How can you learn to live again when you've been convinced you were going to die ?

#txf #dana scully #fox mulder #msr #i'm tagging this as msr because you cannot convince me Mulder wasn't here for every steps towards her recovery #Scully needs a hug and oh boy is Mulder ready to give her one #the cancer arc is making me emotional again #incoherent rambling

[thebeautifulfantastic]

mulder and scully look so sad in season 5. i am diagnosing them as being in need of a good night's sleep and a kiss

#there’s like. several main emotional beats throughout the season and they kind of become more unhappy as the season goes on #cause we start out with redux which is of course intense and mulder is being very affectionate with scully who thinks she’s dying #and then to wrap up the cancer arc we have detour where they’re just happy to be alive and working together again #and scully makes a few attempt at starting a more serious romantic relationship with mulder too but he doesn’t exactly respond in kind #(that’s a whole other post to unpack) #but in the post-modern prometheus they seem pretty happy still AND THEY DANCE #but then the emily arc drops (devastating) and scully pulls away a bit afterwards #then there’s a series of cases where they’re a little bit distant #mulder’s in his own slightly dark headspace during patient x/the red and the black #like. okay #they’re not unfriendly or cold with each other #but there is this sobering realization #this ‘i am in love with you and you are the most important thing to me but you have also cost me everything’ #they know they’re in deep and there’s no going back #but what adds to the angst and underlying sadness is that all this goes unsaid #they’re masters at dancing are the truth (in the words of maisie peters) #which now that i say it is ironic because so much of their mission is to reveal the truth #season 5 is peak repressed feelings #the x files #meta finding tag #msr #belle speaks #txf liveblog #belle liveblogs #txf s5

[cecilysass]

I always think the question with MSR isn’t so much who fell first or fell harder—mainly because I personally think it was pretty simultaneous / parallel—but rather who became self-aware about their feelings first.

In my take on this ship, they may well have gone years without fully admitting to themselves how they felt, or fully addressing the feelings head on. They were so distracted by the work and the Truth and the heady emotional power of Partnership and Trust. It was just really possible for them to stay in denial, these two characters in particular.

I tend to think Mulder faced the music first—that he was the first to accept the feelings weren’t platonic. Maybe I think that because he’s the believer, or he’s a doomed Romantic in a big R sense. I could see this realization coming as early as Scully’s abduction, but it could have been as late as Never Again or the cancer arc, too.

But I think @randomfoggytiger might argue it was Scully who understood her feelings first and waited for him to get his act together. I can be convinced of this, too, especially in fanfic. In The End, Scully has to have some awareness when she is stewing over Diana in that car. That could be her first realization, although it could have been earlier, too.

I listened to the XF Diaries podcast’s recent interview with Frank Spotnitz, and he talked about how he viewed Mulder and Scully in season 6 and the FTF near-kiss. He said they didn’t talk about it because they both thought it was something they shouldn’t have been doing. He said the show couldn’t spell it out for the audience because the characters didn’t have their own feelings figured out.

I thought that was striking, thinking about how all the way as late as season 6 the 1013 writers imagined them in this state of not fully realized feelings. I do get frustrated with this kind of talk because it seems so disembodied and unrealistic. I mean, six years, and they haven’t thought seriously about this?

But … also I admit to kind of liking this really repressed version of MSR. This version of MSR that just can’t get its shit together to admit what is happening. In other words, they aren’t exactly pining. They are more just in massive mutual denial. Fingers in ear, nah, nah, nah, I can’t hear you, no feelings here. That does make dialogue in season 6 episodes like Rain King and HTGSC and Milagro seem especially tense and loaded and fun.

And I do like fanfic that depicts them being forced to come out of denial; it’s much rarer than fanfic with one or both of them consciously pining. I mean, please. Do not mistake me. I like the pining fanfic very much, too, and I write it more. It’s just interesting to think about.

#meta #mulderandscully #MSR #x files #the x files #fox mulder #dana scully

[character-of-all-time]

Now that the submissions are closed, were there any funny submissions that topped the previously stated funny submissions?

I might end up publishing the full response list to browse through at your leisure and so that someone else can seek out the hee hoo funny ha has rather than making myself go through all 1522 again, but I would like to highlight a few submissions that stuck with me:

character: Sam Winchester

from: supernatural

why?: oh COME ON. ur gonna make me defend sam fucking winchester as the most character of all time?? he literally has bangs. he died at 23. he died at 26. he died a lot of other times too but those are the most important ones. he's jesus and he's the antichrist and he gets placed on a visual crucifix too many times to count. he's an addict and he's a christian and god is making his life miserable on a personal level. he is wholeheartedly convinced that there are other people who "have it worse" than him (he was tortured by satan for centuries). again he HAS bangs. he's been possessed too many times to ever feel like his body is his own. he's in a constant cycle of being beaten down and KNOWING he shouldn't get back up, and not wanting to get back up, and getting back up anyway like a kicked puppy who thinks maybe this time they won't get kicked. never ever gives up but in a sad and pathetic way that makes u feel vaguely nauseous. he's psychic. he bought a ring for his girlfriend while they were still in college. he went to stanford. he's unclean in the biblical sense but he prays every night. he had a queer allegory arc spanning multiple seasons that people ignore so they can claim he's cishet. he totally fucked a 300-year-old witch while studying under her to become a witch himself. everyone he has ever loved is dead and he knows it's his fault. he spends the first few decades of his life angry -- SO angry -- at everything he's been put through, full of rage at the things he's suffered and the people who caused them. he is punished for this fury, taught to never be angry again, and after a while he just lies down and takes it. he is a serial killer and on the fbi's most wanted list. he uses "low sodium" as an insult. he's a vegetarian. he never drives his father's car. he has demon blood flowing through his veins and his best friend is a literal biblical angel. he's an abomination. he thinks that hope is kind of the whole point. he has BANGS. he killed his brother several times over, and he destroyed the world to bring his brother back to life a few times too. he spent time in a psych ward. he thinks he is terribly hard to love. his mother destroyed his life before he was even born and he still calls her "mama." he died at 23. he was kicked out of the house when he was 18, and then was kicked out of basically everywhere else for the rest of his life. his only family locked him in a panic room and left him to die. he forgave them for that because he doesn't know how to do anything but forgive. he's got bangs. anyway

what do you want?: u KNOW what i want. if my best friend sam doesn't win this bracket i'm crashing my car into the world's tallest and thickest tree

--------------

character: jesse pinkman

from: breaking bad

why?: Well.Well. i. so. hes THE character okay he was created in gods eyes only to be sculpted and changed by the wrath of satan (or the other way around). Its jesse pinkman. have you ever watched 5 seasons of a grown man with cancer abusing another grown man in order to support his family who hate him because of the way hes trying to support them (drugdealing)?No? well i need you to and then come back to me. jesses relationship with the aforementioned Grown man with cancer (walter white) is so multidimensional you could refer to jesse as walters affair, student, victim, partner in crime, son figure etc and it would be RIGHT because they are all encompassing and fucked up. and jesse loses everything and he cries and hes so emotional but he PREVAILS. he prevails and he precedes walter and all the toxically masculine men who hated him, who convinced him was less than who he was. and the dog motif!!!!! hes a loyal dog but his owner has been slowly feeding him poison, to break him down slowly, and its killing him so he BITES because it hurts and they all talk about the rabid dog he is, how badly the owner needs to put him down. and then his owner gives him away to much worse men, owners who wont feed him the poison slowly, but will beat and use him relentlessly. and then his old owner is going to die and he knows it and he needs to secured his reputation and put everything in place. he saves the dog and kills the dogs new owners. he BEGS for his dog to kill him, to kill him like he had done to the dog. but this dog is not like any of his owners, hw will never be. so he barks and says that he should do it himself and he RUNS. hes crying and whimpering but hes not getting beaten or poisoned anymore, hes a free dog and its up to him to make his own future without the influence of evil owners. THAT'S jesse Pinkman. hes the bride of heisenburg hes the dog motif and he loves and loves and protects animals and kids because he couldn't protect himself and he wins with tears in his eyes. um also hes trans so ^ hasnt watched this show in like 7 months i have mo idea what im talking about

what do you want?: one billion dollars

------

who: Victor frankenstein

from: Mary shelley frankenstein

why?: I don't remember anything about this book except for the incredible and relatable line of 'I raveged an oatcake' cos God man me too

what do you want?: An oatcake

-----

who: sphagnum moss

from: real life

why: Love that bitch. They are light and hold moisture well. and they also form peat bogs when they die which is swag

what do you want?: To be turned into a zebra mussel and sleep in a Marimo moss ball and not have to worry about relationships or taxes

-------

who: Guy Montag

from: Fahrenheit 451

why?: he kills his boss with fire which i think is pretty cool and something we can all aspire to. i also want him to be in an online popularity contest because i want ray bradburys head to explode from beyond the grave

what do you want?: prove life after death so i can destroy ray bradbury’s soul

#askance #supernatural #sam winchester #breaking bad #jesse pinkman #frankenstein #victor frankenstein #guy montag #fahrenheit 451 #sphagnum moss

[aforrestofstuff]

Forrest's Expert Chapter Reviews (166): The Super-Duper Crying in the Bathtub Special Edition!!

Murata released a chapter today. People died.

(BTW there are webcomic spoilers in here so read at your own risk. Thanks! Please enjoy. You're required to by law.)

I just want everyone to know this chapter came out at like 9am (Yeehaw Standard Time) this morning; I was just getting through my routine, sitting down for breakfast. I heard the Discord notification on my phone. I got excited, looking to read this delightful manga with my Frosted Flakes, then I open to this fucking shit on the first page and I put my spoon down and had to sit there for ten fucking minutes to fight these demons.

Hey dawg what the fuck haha

Okay sure, the adults can get a billion tumors in ten minutes and fall over and die but when it happens to the kids??? I dont like that!! I mean this in an affectionate "you broke my heart" sort of way, by the by. I like that the fandom-appointed dads were the first to drop down and help. I like that Zombieman canonically has stubby fucking hands. I like that we get this interaction between him and Isamu. It was painful to look at but I don't hate that it happened. Yep.

I'm gonna be real honest and admit my media illiteracy here, I thought the reason Saitama had a nosebleed in the last chapter was because Garou clocked his shit, and the reason Badd got his nosebleed was that, through a series of complex equations and reaches, Batarou is canon. However, none of those are true, and turns out they're all just getting super-duper radiation poisoning and I'm not sure Saitama's 3 years of working out made him immune to cancer but we'll see about that.

Side note: Badd is one of the only ones who felt the effects of the radiation before everyone else did. Badd also has "dynamic vision" and superb reflexes. You know that scene in Infinity War where, after the snap, Peter Parker can feel it long before he actually disappears due to his spider-sense? Where am I going with this.

Badd has spider sense babeyyy kachow !

Side side note: You know who else felt the effects of the radiation before Saitama and Badd? That's right baby!

"I can feel it in my skin" dawg that's the cancer LMAOOO

Side side side note: Now that we're on the topic of Zombieman (again), it makes sense that he's not immune to the radiation because it's probably killing his cells faster than he can regenerate. That, and he's fucking exhausted at this point. Still though... I'll bet he was the last one standing as all his coworkers collapsed around him. Reminds me of after-work parties at Applebee's haha kachow

I was right when I said Blast would come beat Garou's ass... but at what cost.

Also, I thought he'd bring the Justice League but I guess they've got better fucking shit to do??? Than fight GOD??? LITERAL GOD?? Okay.

Also Bang telling God to give Garou back haha this is not a tear falling down my cheek it's just... spinal fluid...

So, Garou is definitely not being 100% controlled by God but he is being influenced in some capacity, so I can see this kinda growing into an intense fear/trauma of being manipulated/controlled in post-arc Garou. Especially during the neo-heroes arc when Suiryu attempts to capture him.

When Garou sobers after being beaten by Saitama and he sees what he’s done, it’s a mixed bag of emotions. We know he isolates himself post-arc--he already is in the manga with Tareo because he thinks the closer he gets to those he cares for, the more he’ll hurt them. With that being said, will he self-isolate in the manga because he becomes scared of himself? With all his introspection and meditating under waterfalls, will he come to think that all he does is hurt those he cares about? Will he think he doesn’t deserve to love anyone? Find out next time on Forrest Learns How to Read!

I love the idea of Garou spiraling into a self-loathing cocoon because seeing him in pain brings me joy and--yes, he's one of my favorite characters. Why do you ask?

. ok

um. anyways.

haha cool

oh. he's holding Genos' heart. 👍

I'm on my knees praying for christ to strike me down right now.

Ok I'm done with this bit lmao I kinda wanted to build comedic suspense but I can't commit. I'm gonna write an essay on Genos' "death" now.

Really hard to believe he's actually dead and that's ONE's damn fault for faking us out at least twice before (Mumen Rider, Tanktop Master) so I'm not really feeling the suspense to this. ("durrrr but there's not gonna be suspense!! tHat'S wHaT sAiTaMA is FOr!!!" you Redditors are fucking dorks and I hate you.)

BUT. I could be wrong and if I am, feel free to send a dark web hitman my way and strike me down for good!

Regardless, if (when) Genos comes back, he's not gonna be the same. He shouldn't be the same because then what the fuck was all that for?? Anywho, I'm kinda feeling an amnesia storyline? Is he even going to remember this? Is he even going to--gasp--remember Saitama?

Half his fucking brain is gone. As far as we know, having his entire conscience saved to the cloud requires at LEAST 20$ of iCloud per month and we know Kuseno's cheap ass ain't gonna pay for that so, what's he gonna do? Make do, baby!

ONE loves his opposites, loves his narrative foils. Genos has been wanting to get closer to Saitama the entire manga and if the tables turn to Saitama wanting to get closer to Genos during his recovery, out of guilt, maybe, then I think that'll be really interesting. Genos and Garou have been mirroring each other in a lot of ways; I think they're going to have a similar "finding oneself" post-arc.

Either that or Genos is going to be like every upper-middle-class white guy's mystery Mercedes: perpetually "in the shop" until the end of time, dead but dreaming.

So, aside from that: Garou purposefully ripped Genos' heart out because he knew it would make Saitama get serious. Saitama then holds Genos' heart in one hand and beats Garou with the other........... Saigenos Fans please spare Batarou Nation some crumbs PLEASE we haven't eaten for WEEKS (good for you though).

In conclusion:

I should've never learned how to fucking read.

#opm #one punch man #saitama #saigenos #batarou #metal bat #garou #blast #silverfang #genos #mumen rider #zombieman #child emperor #sekingar #meta

[phoenix-before-the-flame]

I also (almost typed aslo again, stupid dyslexia) think about the scene where Erza was retracting Natsu to read and how she put emphasis on characters and words that looked similar (making me think he struggled with those) implying that he may be dyslexic

Also the Magic Cancer from the Alverez arc bothered me so much, because how the fuck do you mistake “Two types of magic fighting for control” for “Antimagic tumor” it feels like the symptoms of those wouldn’t be at all similar, two types of magic fighting for control feels like it would cause an overflow of magic exiting the body which is now how the doctor lady (whose name I can’t spell) described it behaving?? Also the fact that he just went “No” and got better??? THIS FEELS LIKE IT SHOULD BE A MUCH BIGGER DEAL

So ig what I’m saying is when I finally get around to writing a fic Natsu is keeping the Magic cancer/ two magics fighting for control issue. Because Cronic illness does not get much representation in media

Man, I wish I could find back a post i had about Natsu being dyslexic but *slaps Natsu on the back* this boi can fit sooo many hcs- dyslexia, adhd, autism, dyscalculia, etc. Who's doin it like him tbh.

The Magic Cancer plot point also pissed me off because it felt less like something that was given thought and more like something that was hurriedly put in there to create artificial tension (which really is something that can be said about almost everything in alvarez!)

I personally reeeeeeeally don't like it. The dislike is almost strong enough to bring out the haterism in me because it feels so contrived. Oh no! My protag is suddenly sick at the mid point of the final arc because uhhhh *checks notes* he developed magic cancer suddenly when he was hale and hearty enough to win a fight literally just a chapter ago.

The idea of having 2 conflicting magics in him making him sick in his unawakened END state though? That's a fire idea.

Now if that one was being built up from a while (hmmm lemme say around his return from the post tartarus 1 yr timeskip where it's noticeable to others that he tires quicker/ is always napping, y'know things along those lines) that could've been an excellent sign of the growing demonic energy within him (specially since after tartarus Zeref has the book of END in his possession so he could easily be fuckin with it to do this to Natsu. oooh mystery, intrigue, and so on and so forth) and in turn put some more strength to the whole thing of Natsu's demonic side slowly awakening.

Also something something Natsu's demonic energy making him sick/eating him alive from the inside yet he still keeps it hidden from his friends, something something Natsu holding down most of his emotions from his friends. Something something, parallels.

(Also on that last lil point bout chronic illness I personally make Laxus the chronically ill king he should be because canon said he used to be super sickly as a kid and i latched onto it. With regard to Natsu though in my head he's got joint hyper-mobility because uhhhhhh, i like the idea of him being super flexible being very fun and uhhhh i think i should be able to project every once in a while ok byeeeeeeee)

#fairy tail #talking to the firebird #ooooogh magic cancer i dont like u ur so mid as a plot point

[easy-revenge]

Hii

So many people are calling Himeno a groomer and pedophile. What are your thoughts?

hellooo

oof.

ive seen the hate and slander for himeno on all platforms first hand. let me get some things out of the way first:

i do not defend himeno, nor her actions regarding denji. there is no defending that. it is what it is.

i can speak more on what ppl target her for though, bc i think its interesting.

(DISCLAIMER: opinions, in this case mine. no one has to agree with me. i have a lot to say but if you're not willing to listen and don't care about my pov, kindly move past this post. thank u)

the vast majority of ppl hating her that ive seen and/or interacted with online always find a way to get aki involved into the conversation. that's bullshit and i wanna speak on it before i touch on anything else.

aki is around 22 years old.

there is a tiktok here from one of my fav creators breaking that one down since a lot of ppl misread his introduction scene and thought he was 19:

with that said and done, there is nothing weird about aki and himeno whatsoever (ive seen ppl hate her for getting him into smoking which, ig fair, but lets be real for a sec and realize that even not knowing the spoilers, its pretty safe to assume that lung cancer is not what's gonna take them out). aki was around 19 when they met, which makes him a minor, but there was no hints whatsoever about himeno liking him until later on.

she didn't "watch him grow up" or "groom" him. she is in love with him in the present, when they are both of age. she knows aki has feelings for makima and doesn't cross any boundaries as we see both her and aki are comfortable being close with each other and initiating contact.

with the aki bullshit done, let's go back to the real thing: denji.

again, what himeno did to denji is inexcusable. there is no way around it. the fact that she was drunk doesn't serve as an excuse bc she still very much is the adult in the room and should've been more responsible.

i want to however talk about the terminology.

groomer.

a groomer is someone who builds a relationship, trust and emotional connection with a child or young person so they can manipulate, exploit and abuse them.

^ this is copy pasted from a dictionary. ring a bell? yes, that's literally makima.

himeno on the other hand did none of those things to denji. her offering him a kiss was more of a joke than anything else (plus she didn't know he was 16 back then) and she never had an ulterior motive for getting close to him.

im actually fairly certain that ppl call her a groomer more regarding aki than denji bc aki is the one she's known for a longer time and has had an effect on. i won't go back into this. utter bullshit. aki is not a child and himeno is not manipulating him. next.

the pedophile allegation is a bit of a rougher one to talk about. himeno initiated this playful flirting with denji at the start of the eternity devil arc, not knowing his age. she said explicitly right after that she "loves teasing boys" which implies that it was more a joke than anything else and considering that we proceed to get numerous flashbacks that let us know how deep her relationship with aki is and how genuine her feelings for him are, we can safely assume she does not give a fuck about denji.

the actual act that brought on the "pedophile" term happens when she is drunk. this, again, does not excuse her but i think can speak volumes about her state of mind. we know she gets extra flirty when she drinks and by the time the kiss happens she's tried to outdrink makima which means she's literally hammered. she is also drunk, significantly less but still, when she finds out denji's age. we know she is present enough for that info bc she remembers it the next morning when she brings it up, but again i dont think processing and comprehending information works just as well when you're half a dozen draft beers in. i dont have something more solid to say about this besides: she was really drunk and made some really bad choices bc she is irresponsible, flawed and generally messy as a person.

i dont feel comfortable calling her a pedophile. it doesn't ring that true to me. i dont think she is genuinely attracted to denji or would want to have sex with him while sober.

she knows it was wrong the next morning and she brings it up. that also shows that sober and with a clear mind she doesn't feel the same way.

the act itself is still horrible and inexcusable, but i think her thought process matters when it comes to assigning terms to her.

at the end of the day, i cant fight the ppl who do call her a pedophile. she did in fact attempt to have a sexual encounter with a minor. end of story. i mostly went into depth about this to talk about the aki thing bc it keeps popping up.

as for me, i choose to not erase her entire character over that one scene and reduce her to what ppl see her as. her arc is very well-written. SHE is very well-written. i keep recycling my words from my other posts but i think she is a perfect reflection of the universe she is in. we know she drinks and numbs everything out. we know the kind of dependency she has when it comes to aki and how it can cloud her judgment. she is very messy as i said and fundamentally flawed. but i loved seeing a broken character.

in a series like csm where denji can get cut in half and get back up to fight, its important for me to have characters like her to make u rly feel the impact of living in a world like this.

also the easy revenge storyline was dope as shit.

that's all about my thoughts on this, ive beem wanting to articulate them for a while, thank u for giving me the chance !!

#answered #chainsaw man #himeno chainsaw man #chainsaw man anime #himeno #aki hayakawa #akimeno #anime #manga #chainsaw man ask

[antialiasis]

The Marvels

This movie had fun bits but was kind of forgettable and eh on the whole. However, it also featured one of the most blatant missed narrative opportunities I have ever seen, so here is a little rant about it.

So the film establishes early that Carol Danvers (Captain Marvel) was devastated and in denial about losing Maria Rambeau, her best friend from her first movie, to cancer, and that she had neglected to come home to take care of Maria's daughter Monica Rambeau who got snapped in Infinity War and then traumatically returned five years later to find her mother dead.

Later, we establish that the reason she didn't return was largely because when she destroyed the AI that ran the Kree home planet Hala in (I think, I don't remember it super well) her own first movie, she inadvertently doomed the inhabitants of their planet to misery, and she had been stewing in guilt about how she ought to be fixing it somehow, without ever knowing how. The villain of the film is from Hala and ostensibly motivated by wanting to return it to its former glory by stealing other planets' atmosphere/water/sun.

To the extent that the movie has an emotional core or character arc, it's about Carol's guilt and loneliness and how Monica felt that Carol had failed her by not being there for her. When they're having their climactic fight with the villain at the end, Monica suggests that hey, Carol could totally just use her light-based power to revive Hala's sun. Carol says what, but I've never done anything like that, and Monica's like, well, I've done a lot of things I've never done before on this mission. Shortly afterwards, Monica sacrifices herself by going into a rift in spacetime in order to close it, and Carol is devastated when she realizes what she's doing, desperately flying after her and reaching out only for the rift in reality to close, leaving Carol floating in empty space, alone. Once again too late to be there for Monica.

Shortly afterwards we cut to Kamala Khan (who was also with them) coming home to Earth alone with tears in her eyes. She tells Nick Fury that they lost Monica, and that Carol went to fulfill a promise.

So now I think, ah. This is what this has all been about. This is the bit where we get the culmination of that emotional arc, right? Carol has once again lost everything and everyone, and she realizes she has this one way to finally atone for the mistake that has haunted her by trying to kickstart Hala's sun. Only, as we've established, she has never done anything like this. She would probably have no idea if she would make it out alive if she attempted this, but right now she's ready to attempt it anyway, because everyone's gone and Monica already died for this and she probably deserves it, right? We're going to have a climactic emotional scene for her, where she maybe has a final few seconds as she averts her eyes from the blinding light ahead to allow herself to grieve her friend and her daughter that she loved as her own. She's about to fly towards her final purpose believing she's probably not coming back, right? If she comes back it'll be after an intense scene of agonizing effort during which she'll need to find the resolve to move on despite everything, or else this is Carol's last movie, where we spend the film with her grappling with these inner demons and she perhaps manages to find some final peace in her last moments of sacrifice before we fade to white?

...No, what we get is a short CGI wide shot of her flying into a darkened sun, the sun brightening, and then her tiny form shoots back out at the top of it, just the same as before except maybe more glowy. Not a trace of emotion, effort or intensity in this scene whatsoever. Part of me is convinced surely they must have filmed it and then someone just decided to cut it because it didn't make her look cool enough, or something. Surely, surely, you wouldn't write the film with the active choice to make this moment so nothing.

Worse, with no emotional draw to the scene, it just leaves us with the hollow, aching sense of oh. So she could have just done that this whole time? All this guilt and all she had to do was just casually fly into the sun and out of it again which isn't even painful to her or anything? The only reason she hadn't done that already and saved these people untold suffering was that she just hadn't thought of it yet?

It wouldn't have been a great film even if it had pulled off that moment - the villain never quite landed, Kamala is fun and endearing but Carol is the only one of the three mains with any kind of arc going on and even in her case it's not super well developed. But I can so easily picture that scene as a genuinely strong and emotional moment that would have redeemed the film and made it worth it despite the rocky way it got there, and I'm very sad on behalf of everyone involved in it that somehow we got this nothingburger of a non-scene instead.

#marvel #movies #the marvels #carol danvers #ramble

[trmpt]

SEPTEMBER 28, 2023

Remarks by President Biden Honoring the Legacy of Senator John McCain and the Work We Must Do Together to Strengthen Our Democracy

Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests — (applause) — in the end, John McCain thought about the beginning. Five years ago, as John was dying from brain cancer, John wrote a farell- — a farewell letter to the nation that he said — that he served so well in both war and in peace.

His words tracked back centuries to America’s founding and then toward a triumphant future. Here’s what John wrote, and I quote, “We are citizens of the world — the world’s greatest republic. A nation of ideals, not blood and soil. Americans never quit. They never hide from history. America makes history.”

And John was right. Every other per- — every other nation in the world has been founded on either a grouping by ethnicity, religion, background. We’re the most unique nation in the world. We’re founded on an idea — the only major nation in the world founded on an idea. An idea that we are all created equal, endowed by our Cr- — in the image of God, endowed by our Creator to be — to be able to be treated equally throughout our lives.

We’ve never fully lived up to that idea, but we’ve never walked away from it. But there’s danger we’re walking too far away from it now, the way we talk in this deba- — in this country. Because a long line of patriots from — like John McCain kept it from ever becoming something other than what it is.

I often think about our friendship of 40 years. The hammer-and-tong debates we’d have in the Senate. We’d argue — we were like two brothers. We’d argue like hell. (Laughs.) I mean really go at one another. Then we’d go lunch together. (Laughter.) No, not a joke. Or John would ride home with me. I mean, we — we traveled the world together.

And, by the way, when he found this magnificent woman and got married, I’m the guy that convinced him to run in Arizona as a Republican. Bless me, Father, for — (makes the sign of the cross). (Laughter and applause.) No, but it’s — you’ve got to admit, Cindy, I did. I talked to him, and I said, “John, you can do this job. My only worry is you’ll do it too well.” (Laughter.)

But, look, running on opposite sides of the nation’s highest office when — when he was running for president and I was on the vice presidential ticket — we still remained friends.

The conversations we had — he had with my son, Beau — the attorney general of the state of Delaware, a decorated major in the U.S. Army, was a guy who spent a year in Iraq — about serving in a war overseas, about the courage in battle against the same cancer that took John and my son.

Two weeks ago, I thought about John as I was standing in another part of the world — in Vietnam. I don’t want to be — I — excuse me if I — it was an emotional trip.

I was there to usher in a 50-year arc of progress for the two countries, pushed by John and, I might add, another John — this is the former Secretary of State, John from Massachusetts, won the Silver Star as well.

Once at war, we are now choosing the highest possible partnership, made possible through John’s leadership. I mean that sincerely. Think about it.

While in Hanoi, I visited a marker depicting where John — what John — where John had endured all the pain. Imprisoned five and a half years. Solitary confinement for two years. Given an opportunity — an opportunity to come home if he just said a couple things. He was beaten, bloodied, bones broken, isolated, tortured, left unable to raise his arms above his shoulders again.

As I stood there paying my respects, I thought about how much I missed my friend. And it’s not hyperbole. I — from the bottom of my heart, I mean this.

I thought about something else as well. I thought about how much America missed John right now, how much America needed John’s courage and foresight and vision. I thought about what John stood for, what he fought for, what he was willing to die for. I thought about what we owed John, what I owed him, and what we owe each other — we owe each other — we owed each other as well — and Americans as well.

You see, John is one of those patriots who, when they die, their voices are never silent. They still speak to us. They tug at both our hearts and our conscience.

And they pose the most profound questions: Who are we? What do we stand for? What do we believe? What will we be?

For John, it was country first. Sounds like a — like a movie, but it’s real with John: honor, duty, decency, freedom, liberty, democracy.

And now, history has brought us to a new time of testing. Very few of us will ever be asked to endure what John McCain endured. But all of us are being asked right now: What will we do to maintain our democracy? Will we, as John wrote, never quit? Will we not hide from history, but make history? Will we put partisanship aside and put country first?I say we must and we will. We will. (Applause.)

But it’s not easy. It’s not easy

#president biden #john mccain #president biden dedication of john mccain library #democracy

[southpark-trashfactory]

South Park Spoilers, kinda, I haven't seen the episode yet, I'm just referencing spoilers I've seen, so I might not fully get the context.

I'm kind of tired of the big stand out moments for the girls in South park mainly being them being put into emotional distress until they retaliate in violence? If they retaliate at all?

Like, it worked in "The Breast Cancer Show Ever" because it was something Wendy was passionate about, so it played into her character, and it was refreshing because it was one of the first times the point of an episode was to focus on Cartman's deserved comeuppance, and it was only helped by Wendy and Cartman's already established relationship?

But like, it feels like that's the only way the girls have been allowed to have big moments now?

Like Heidi's whole arc was basically just focusing on her being mentally abused by Cartman, becoming abusive in retaliation, and then once she finally left him, the show essentially forgot about her.

And now those screen shots or Bebe kicking Butters ass are a thing...

Once again, I haven't seen the episode, but judging by how people are talking about it, I take it that Butters is still on his Incel shit, so I have no doubt he 100% had it coming, but honestly that just makes me feel bad for Bebe. She's one of the oldest characters in the show and one of her biggest moments in recent years is her beating up a boy likely because he made her Hella uncomfortable? Was it even something specifically to do with her character or was she chosen to fill this role just cause she's a girl and the girls are all basically treated as interchangeable?

Either way, I would have rather there been an episode where we got to see Bebe actually being treated like a character, rather than just a vehicle to deal out punishment for Butters recent shitheadedness. (Honesly if they just wanted a girl to kick the shit out of him without thinking about her character, it should been Nelly since she's specifically had beef with Butters before)

Maybe I'm jumping the gun a bit posting this, I just saw the screen shots and was really disappointed that this is the first big appearance for Bebe in a while.

#south park #sp spoilers #south park spoilers #kinda #rant #i guess? #musings

[quietbluejay]

The Buried Dagger 2

Loken??? repeated sparkle emojis

Loken: hey how about we don't torture or mistreat the traumatized rescued prisoners in an attempt to make them coherent

aaa loken you really did have a good character arc an actual positive one!!! a miracle in this series

okay, i will say, i am intrigued by the story of this psyker ultramarine or former ultramarine waitttt 1s i gotta check something in Know No Fear I think he got one scene YES HE WAS THE GUY I WAS THINKING OF he got a headache the day before the attack but because the emperor got rid of the librarius he ignored it because they weren't supposed to use their powers any more

oh boy we're back with mort and….people have begun getting sick wow this is very gross

oh wait he's STILL ALIVE yikes oh noo mortarion tried to mercy kill him but he's still alive and suffering oh back to the past mortarion is feeling Emotions seeing people reunite and of course some of them wanted to kill typhon and mortarion mortarion gets exposed to "laughter" and "music" he has friend (!!!)

(pulling up Godblight (?) quote)

HE ACTUALLY WAS A CHAMPION OF COMMON PEOPLE NO JOKE

And you get a horrible backstory and you get a horrible backstory

he wants to actually fix things

Man, what happened to you In the end, he once again became the death dealer of an evil overlord okay so the villagers are getting ready to harvest the wheat and You may be able to tell from this sentence where this is going

picking up the scythe first as a farming tool rather than a weapon

(But also like it does take practice to figure out how to harvest wheat with a scythe I too have read Island in the Sea of Time I know how this works I kind of hate how every time I have an objection of this nature it can be handwaved away by "primarchs are just built different")

OwO Girl got trapped under the cart with all the wheat and it’s broken So Mort pulls a Jean Valjean Uh oh overlord interrupt

And on that note it’s back to the present Interesting choice of cutoffs

This explains the poison drinking I guess

I kind of want to stab him a bunch for this But then I think the story is gonna do it for me

The spooky sickness has somehow spread all over the fleet despite zero contact

Bruh What about your super dramatic speech at Nikaea Mortarion: covid lockdown time

lmao Mr I Have No Theatricality Unlike Some People Oh boy one of the ships tried to leave the warp and uh got crushed Everyone on board is dead

back on the Terra plot thread and Malcador has a very creepy library

malcador is basically a supervillain mastermind and Rubio is being called out for taking initiative and taking the Silent Sister they rescued to White Mountain even though it was what Malcador says he would have ordered him to do anyways anyways as you might have guessed I'm not a Malcador fan

oh yeah they put together what all the captured sisters were saying and it looks like it's Horus trying to negotiate a truce

….thinking of it as arrogant sure is revealing something about you. but also really does sum up the imperium huh

aw, Loken

;-; okay hey we have timeline! it's been 7 years since the war started

it's hard to think of a path the emperor could have taken that would have created less peace

malcador and the emperor had good intent but absolutely abysmal macro and micro planning skills

"oh yes it's just the fault of the bad advisor the emperor of course can do nothing wrong" bleh

horus somehow, possesses rubio or he was a sleeper agent or sth welp this is why we can't have nice things

Okay so mort is keeping a daemon imprisoned in a secret compartment That only he can access And he is going to visit Oh dear the warp whispers to mort

Daemon: and it slaps. Cancer is great

Back in time again They’re winning, but still...

lol

he actually has a sense of humour!

Hm. Foreshadowing. Mortarion, don’t make your friends drink 150 proof….

Why does he sound like my mother

typhon does mortarion analysis

oh dear typhon thinks about how if they used warp shenanigans they could end the war in. weeks or even days

back over to Loken he's fighting pro-Horus groups on Terra

that's loken, all right also Malcador continues to be dramatique

#warhammer 40k #bluejay reads warhammer

[deathsbestgirl]

memento mori

i’m ready to be torn to shreds

okay but !!! i’m weak every time scully has a little monologue. the way she speaks just cuts right through me. the words, the rhythm of her speech. yes thank you gillian (+ writers)

the words she’s saying for mulder. speaking to him over anyone else in her life. monumental. they know what they have even if it isn’t voiced or shown traditionally between them.

(i am SO curious — did viewers have any idea that this is what was coming? scully having cancer?)

mulder making his way through the hospital with flowers. making a joke, like he always does. her smile. she loves him so much. but his worry is palpable and he can’t wait for her to tell him so he asks. the way he looks at her !!!!

she’s so GENTLE when she tells him. at the same time though, she’s telling him there’s no hope. eventually, however much time there is, she will die. he refuses to accept that — because there can’t possibly be a life without scully. they’re too entwined, their connection consuming. and she knows this. she know what losing her will do to him…

so they already know who has gotten treatment? like the next scene they’re in skinner’s office. was this part of a past case idr?? when she met all the mufon women?

scully just has no idea what she means to skinner. they’re not close, but he’s someone they want to trust even though he’s a thorn in their sides more often than not. because that’s his job lol but he’s always there when they need him.

she doesn’t want it to be ~awkward. she doesn’t want his concern or pity, or to take leave (as he rightfully expects her to take) — she just wants the go ahead to investigate the source of her cancer. like this woman. these agents. they’re crazy and he can’t tell them no. i LOVE skinner.

and then they learn betsy hagopian is already gone. her fear.

god when they’re chasing kurt crawford and scully’s nose starts bleeding. mulder can’t hide his concern, can’t even let her finish in the bathroom before checking on her 🥺

she’s so BOTHERED when he isn’t in cuffs anymore lmao

this scene makes it so clear that scully really is afraid to believe. she can’t believe she was abducted by aliens or the government and experimented on, resulting in her cancer & probable eventual death. it goes “against” everything she believes in — in her country, her faith. and it’s a terrifying thing even without that.

mulder is so gentle when he tries to encourage her confront it, and she doesn’t seem to want to but she listens & visits penny northern. and i think it’s just so precious the way she listens to him despite how much she doesn’t want to believe & how scared she is, even though she’s trying not to be.

“…i think that we both know that right now the truth is in me and that’s where i need to pursue it…”

he want to stay on the path he’s on to help her, but scully asks for him and he doesn’t hesitate for a second 🥹🥺🥺

scully knew mulder would come & do as she asked, without question, without any doubt. this arc is so painful but it’s my favorite for the leaps & bounds their relationship takes — even if they don’t explicitly voice anything. for mulder, you see it with his gestures & his worry/concern for her. with scully, you see it in the way she’s so vulnerable with him.

maggie scully’s reaction is soul crushing. her fear, her terror is almost unbearable. she can’t lose another child. and she doesn’t want to be protected.

scully writing to mulder — her thoughts & feelings — is so intense. she’s trying so hard to allay his guilt and bring him peace. like. this is the most heart wrenching thing and so fucking heartfelt. i love when we get to see into scully’s mind because it’s always overflowing with love & so many emotions that we only get to ~see rarely.

gods her nightmare. was that a memory? and then penny northern was there for her again. even the way she shows vulnerability with penny is just. incredible. scully still can’t face it though. she doesn’t want to remember or make sense of it, and penny is so gentle with her too. the compassion is just. overflowing

OH GOD. mulder going to skinner.

“i’m pretty damn sure sure she’s never undergone treatment for fertility.” especially not at a federal facility…

he wants a meeting with csm so he can save scully — skinner won’t let him put himself in that position because csm ~deals in lies~ (I LOVE SKINNER WITH MY WHOLE HEART)

and finally FINALLY mulder brings in the gunmen. i love this little family so much.

and god. skinner knows he’ll find csm in THEIR office. how fucking dare he be there?? skinner is so willing to put himself on the line for them, knowing a lot more about what he’s setting himself up for. but he does it because he loves scully (& mulder) and he believes they’re worth it. like literally my heart could explode. i feel like this is the moment you truly know skinner is on their side. he’s done a few things in the past (not letting mulder abandon the x files, wetwired) but this is next level, so far beyond anything.

he has this whole operation going to find out what’s going on with the fertility clinic & scully is writing to him — calling it “his own path” when it’s all for scully. like my dear sweet scully, your paths are the same. they can’t be separated anymore.

and he finds more kurt crawfords. he knows exactly what they are now. (team they were made from scully because they’re so soft and i like this guy.)

the way they’re trying to cure the cancer that’s afflicted all these women. and he finds scully’s ova, they bring mulder right to them. learning scully’s barren. that the abducted women are their mothers. they want to save their mothers 😭

sincerely, the lengths these men go to for scully is so far beyond the realm of possibility and they are INCREDIBLE.

close call with that psycho shooter and mulder SPRINTS to scully’s room, he doesn’t find her but he finds the notebook she’s been writing in. the PAIN.

when byers leads him to scully, the RELIEF in his eyes. penny northern instilling hope in scully again. it’s so good. scully has the softest heart & incredible strength. mulder sat outside the room waiting for scully, giving her that time with penny. then telling her about reading what she wrote and she’s so sad he read it. because she has more to do, she’s not giving up. he has so much faith in her, that she will find the answers & save herself. scully still thinks she’s going to die, but she also believes she can live with the cancer. it’s the ~treatment that can kill a person faster.

she has too much left to do. for all those other women, for the x files, for mulder. for HERSELF. i can’t explain how happy it makes me that she puts herself on the list & that’s what’s most important. the LIGHT in mulder’s eyes when she says it.

mulder calling skinner to tell him he’s right about csm, that there’s another way — and skinner is sitting there with him and says “there’s always another way” and that fucking bastard “if you’re willing to pay the price. mulder was but scully is fighting & that’s all he needed to know. but skinner. he’ll still pay the price in case it’s necessary. again — love this man with my whole heart

#txf txt #mulder and scully #dana scully #fox mulder #walter skinner #the lone gunmen #memento mori #cancer arc

[todayisafridaynight]

GLAD STREAM WENT SMOOTHLY THIS TIME had so much fun!!

BUT NOOOOOOO SOME OF YOUR FRAMING AND ANGLES REMINDED ME... We finished Hero recently so we rewatched Hero SP and watched the "sequel"… Hero SP is still my favorite thing to come out of it by far TBH but I was happy to see Nakai's character back in the latter [he's got this starting-to-grey beard, so Obviously I Was Thinking About Arakawa Aging In The Years Ichi Was Gone, and also he's smiling almost every second he's on-screen so I was :] ].

At the same time, because Takita's a Sympathetic Antagonist Who Went To Prison Returning In A Sequel… it put the fear of God in me with regard to Jo coming back because [spoilers </3] Takita's only in it for two-and-a-half scenes and he has cancer… I would say One Fear but again I have MANY FEARS when it comes to Jo and honestly MOST OF THEM are about not getting a satisfactory resolution [if there has to be one], like Aoki. I'd already made my peace with him not coming back at all in 2019 [2018 if I'm counting RGGJo]… pleeease don't do him dirty that's my emotional support shitty old bitch 😭😭😭

Extremely specific worries aside here are Nakai's dogs Kurumi and Pairan as promised :] Kurumi means walnut... if you even care...

STREAM WORKING MEANS I DIDNT HAVE TO PICK UP ICE FISHING YIPPEE !!!!!!!!

ABOUT JO THO AND HIS INEVITABLE-RETURN-BUT-UNCERTAIN FATE.... we can only wait... rgg wont let me in their basement anymore i cant leak secrets as to what could happen to him- at the very least i hope the rgg team understands people like satisfactory, Non Bullshit endings to character arcs.... so here's to hoping he gets that if possible :] if not uhhhh hope he gets the least cringe exit from the series :]]

BUT NAKAI'S DOGS HELLOOOOO THEY'RE BABIES I LOVE THEM HIIII !!!!!!! THEIR NAMES ARE SO CUTE PAIRAN AND CHESTNUT..... im ashamed to admit i already knew 'kurumi' meant chestnut.... as krillin's name from dragon ball derives from 'kuri'.... that doesnt make the name any less cute it makes them better TO ME (❁´▽`❁)

#long post #snap chats #i was about to ask if i should watch hero but then i see hiroshi abe is in it and idk why that makes me compelled to watch... #when i have time.. i will certainly examine it with my eyeballs.. #moreover im surprised my comic got you thinkin of hero..... most curious as to how exactly tho cool nevertheless... #rip takita you were chill as hell for killin a dude for fuckin with the ocean... rip about the cancer you were baller in my eyes... #fuck but speaking of middle-of-aging arakawa i keep forgetting i did want to draw that. and by Draw That i mean like. #just basically give y7 arakawa rggo arakawa's stubble LMAO one day... when i stop being plagued with images.. #ok is everyone gone. are you all done reading. get out #THAT PEONY IS SO PRETTY thats what i think mr nakai... and chestnut is an adorable baby 😭😭😭 #TWO BIG ASS DOGS he really is living the life... im crying omg... #THEYRE SO CUUUUUUUTE I LOVE DOGSSSSSS WAHHHH #anyway. to end this ramble. DID NOT expect to scroll down to see my guy with the unbuttoned shirt HELLO #stylish...... chique...... SUCH a vibe with the two dogs in the backyard.... #genuinely obsessed with the like five blog posts youve sent me of nakai's...... #ok im taking a walk. probably accidentally think of more things to create BYE #many thanks for the dog pics.......... mwah...

[sophsun1]

Just some random thoughts I'd like to get your opinion on, but I really wish there had been more of a discussion between Britin before they got engaged. It kind of seemed to me like the proposal was supposed to sweep all of their problems under the rug, but I feel like they really needed to talk more after the fallout from 5x07. I know they're not really the type to have those long talks but idk, I still wish it'd happened +

because I got so much emotional whiplash from the whole syphilis fiasco, Justin walking out on Brian for the second time, then they get engaged, then they end the engagement, then Justin leaves for NYC...whew.

Hey!

Okay.. deep breath this will probably get long.. help!

I totally agree I've always felt that they never had 'the big relationship talk' that was really warranted after 5x11 and Justin agreeing to marry Brian. We saw them go through their multiple breakups, their differences over the kind of life/relationship they wanted to live, their lack of communication so in turn we needed to see them talking about how they had learnt from all this and who they would be as a partnership going forward especially into marriage. Similar to the talks we got in 2x06 when they set the rules and in 3x08 when they reunited in the office. They did address the cause of their breakups then in a very britin way which I would've liked once more.

But I think the writers just wanted to get to the big 'omg they're finally gonna be together' moment with the proposal which technically was them getting back together and engaged at the same time lol and skipped the rest. I'm just going to bullet point my thoughts on what gave me whiplash because I'm a rambling mess, hope it makes sense!

Justin's switch from being okay and fully into the open side of their relationship to being upset/annoyed over Brian's lifestyle choices did confuse and annoy me. Because of how quickly they had him flip between the two and where he stood. In season four before the cancer arc begins we have Justin joking about how many guys are hitting on him at the gym, competing in the bet to hook up with the guy who turns out to be a doctor. He's fully into it and has no issues about it affecting them. But the start of season five and his return from LA has him suddenly wanting to be just like Michael and Ben with a white picket fence and 2.4 children.

The conclusion of the Liberty Ride episodes has Brian post cancer where he's revaluated what's important to him. He wants to be a better father to Gus and in a rare moment of vulnerability he tells Justin he wants him to move back in and that when he's not around he misses him. The growth from 1x10 and "this place is only big enough for one person and that's me" to "I'd like it if you and I were to live together" is huge. Cue season five and Brian's sudden retreat back into "eww relationships I hate those and I wanna be the season 1/2 fuckboy again" made my head spin. We left off with him wanting to live with Justin and you know growing into a real boy and starting to transition into the next stage of his life.

That didn't mean he was gonna lose his personality but his attitude towards Justin and his openess suddenly vanishes and he's back to being reckless and closed off. The Brandon bet and syphilis plot just made me wanna slap some sense into him it was all pointless in the end. Because what does he learn - that he loves Justin and him falling back into his old habits and drinking his pain away doesn't work. There will always be a new stud of Liberty Avenue and maybe finally freeing himself from that defining him would let him progress in his life .... WHICH HE KNEW AT THE END OF SEASON FOUR!!!

Justin's disdain at Brian's promiscuity and refusal to settle down was believable in parts because he has always wanted a more settled and family oriented life. From season one Justin was jealous and not fully comfortable with Brian being with other guys and we saw them try with the rules to solve that but it failed. Their reunion in 3x09 we get the deliberate scene with Justin sassing the trick about how he'll only ever have Brian once so it seems he's finally comfortable and cool with it. But nope back on the merry go round we go.....

After Justin agrees to marry Brian we 100% needed them to have a big talk about how things were gonna be different this time. Brian baring his soul and saying ily was amazing and something we had waited for but the aftermath to it was so lacking. Considering it was some pretty major issues that divided them it's just unsatisfying that they swept it all under the rug. Instead we got that awful conversation with Brian flipping out over a cuddle and turning into a stepford husband. And now Justin is all okay with their kinky sex life and is hiring strippers and is upset when Brian doesn't hook up with them??? WHERE WAS THE CONVERSATION ABOUT ALL THIS STUFF?

They just glossed over a lot of issues maybe because of time constraints within the plot and the 13 episodes they had. Also there were multiple plots that were revolving around Brian - his friendship with Michael/Lindsey and Gus leaving/ His life with Justin and his own personal journey. So with all these story arcs involving him needing to be tied up I think they thought is there really a need to get deep with this relationship stuff with britin seeing as we're gonna end up separating them again. Spoiler alert... yes there was..

#britin #queer as folk #soph asks #phew #i hope this makes sense #im so much better #at verbal explanations #asfdkj #season five was a mess #where was my deep #and meaningful relationship talk #it was so needed #regardless of the ending

[pitynostars]

what are the main reasons the chibnall era doesn’t work for you? (not a hater btw, just curious)

Hi anon 🥰 to be honest, I’m still trying to pinpoint it all myself ! While I was thinking about this and writing it out I’ve realised it mainly boils down to:

I think a lot of the writing is boring and inconsistent, from characters to big arcs to individual episodes.

Too many important character/relationship moments happening offscreen, or just told to us rather than shown to us.

So much wasted potential (I think this is the worst part for me because if it was just Bad I wouldn’t be so frustrated by it you know?) I feel like I’ve had more fun in the fandom reading people’s speculations and headcanons all era than watching the actual show itself

Sort of in line with that, rehashing of old ideas (+ not doing anything new/interesting with them).

I don’t know what it is specifically, whether it’s the writing, acting, or directing, editing, something else, but the whole era has such a patronising vibe to me? All the characters act like stereotypical primary school teachers at their most annoying and it drives me INSANE

So to elaborate:

The writing style of the era seems to be “drop something interesting and then forget about it until maybe we remember it and decide to do something with it” but the something they do with it is often boring as shit and I’m left after every episode/season with an overwhelming “... ok so what was the point of any of that?” feeling. From big things like the whole Timeless Child arc, to Ryan vlogging, to Yaz’s MH/queerness, Graham’s cancer, Dan’s “take the soup, will you?” moment, The Eternals in CYHM?, Ruth/Martin!Doctor etc. etc. 

I KNOW Chibnall can write nuanced plots, characters and relationships, but in his era of DW it just doesn’t work for me. Take the Timeless Child arc, beat for beat it’s just like name drop the Timeless Child in 11x02, monologue exposit about it in 12x10, don’t really deal with the fallout/emotional development the Doctor gets from it at all apart from one scene out of the blue in NY. Repeat through Flux (the watch is brought in to remind her it exists and she makes the exact same choice she does in TTC to Choose to be the Doctor, independent of whatever might have happened in her past). Her changing her mind about how she feels about it all in prison? Happens off screen. Her chasing after Karvanista so obsessively? Off screen. We’re just told afterward that she’s back to caring about it. 

Same with thasmin, there’s a couple of random comments in Arachnids, Villa etc until Flux, but then it skips over actually letting Yaz and the Doctor interact so it’s like ok like. Do they have a laugh together? Does the Doctor care for Yaz when she's scared/upset (seeing 13's interactions with Graham I'd say No. Also the only time I can remember we've seen Yaz upset and comforted is Spyfall and that's by Ryan). What’s in their dynamic that I’m supposed to be invested in, all we get from them 99% of the time is Yaz asking a question so the Doctor can exposit about it (which again ties back into my oh my god everyone feels like a patronising primary school teacher problem). Their dynamic in Flux is just the Doctor being a dick and Yaz taking it (with gooey eyes half the time lol). Then we get to second half of flux + the specials and honestly I don’t think one person pining for the other can be considered a whole relationship dynamic in itself (or again, if it can be, it’s… very boring lol).

-

I feel like the characters are all pretty badly defined in general, but the characterisations we do get are boring or rehashes of previous characters. We know now Chibnall specifically wanted to bring on a woman to play the Doctor, but also wrote her as so passive (people point to episodes like Rosa and are like “well she couldn’t step in!! It would change history!!” okay who keeps writing her into these situations!! It’s okay to have those sorts of plots/resolutions as long as there’s some episodes where the Doctor has to make a choice and have a win), and when she’s NOT written super passive, she makes a crazy ass decision which doesn’t really add up at all with the rest of her character - e.g., taking the cyberium, blowing up the Master (and then letting Ko Sharmus do it), (ditto with the Sea Devils and Ji Hun). 

Which then goes with the fact she’s written with her morals all over the place (the spider in Arachnids, to being an absolute ARSE to Yaz in Flux to abandoning Dan in LotSD but she’s still got this damn high horse about using violence (except when its HER bombing people (: uwu) – I know this hypocrisy is present in other Doctor’s too but it’s exactly why I find Ten so annoying, like why repeat this for her !!!! At least with Ten we got Waters of Mars!!!!!!!!!! 12’s dying wish was for them as the Doctor to continue to be KIND but 13 falls immediately back into 10’s self centred arsehole persona of ESPECIALLY being an arsehole to your friends which I just hate watching. 

Another point I find frustrating about 13 is literally why cast a woman if you’re not going to do a gender identity arc. Like perfect opportunity, Yaz or Ryan or Graham could have been trans if you didn’t want to give the Doctor that arc specifically because they’re an alien yada yada but why do it. The only thing that’s done with it is have her be confused (even tho the Doctor’s been interacting with humans for literally centuries and knows how gender works for us), and make patronising “I’ve had an upgrade” “life’s so hard for women back then” jokes. I’m tearing my hair out.  For so long in the beginning of her era I was just screaming at the TV for the writing to let her do something ANYTHING that let her show an emotion other than like. Preppy/patronising highschool teacher. When she’s actually allowed to expression emotion, it’s usually just so many scenes that make her look stupid/silly (I’m thinking of the scene in Spyfall when she’s like “snap!! … is that not what we’re playing?” there’s a difference between making her funny and weird and alien and just making her into a clown), which works when balanced with darker/more serious/more calculating moments but we don’t really get to see a lot of that from her, and when we do it’s usually quite isolated from the rest of the characters, so doesn’t really feel like it’s got an actual impact.  

Of the (assumedly) complete character arcs we’ve got they’re both quite boring in my opinion. Obviously not every companion has to Become God and Fall For Their Hubris but like. “Guy decides he’d rather stay home actually” and “other guy decides he wants to stay with him too actually” is just sooo boring. Their arcs are literally just like they go along for the ride, get tired of it and go home. Revolutionary. As I said before, 13’s is just the realisation her past doesn’t define her (on LOOP) with a dash of Ten’s arrogance/hypocrisy thrown in (which like… he’s my least fave Doctor of the ones I’ve seen!!! I don’t want a rehash of his era!!! Even if it was written well!!!).

RE: Yaz, she was introduced like “can’t you give me something that’ll challenge me?” and to be honest I don’t think we’ve really seen her challenged yet. I feel like they’ve tried to do a rehash of Clara’s becoming the Doctor arc in Flux, but the whole reason Clara’s arc hit is because we saw 1. WHY it came about (losing Danny and everything else through s8), and 2. THE FALLOUT, of both HER going too far and the Doctor’s grief. With Yaz, they just brought it up and have done nothing with it. She got so little characterisation through s11/12 and then when she finally gets Something they do nothing with it AND it’s more about someone else and her feelings for them than it’s about HER. 

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I think the relationships in the show also suffer due to the messy/lack of characterisation. None of (either of) the main team have any tension or disagreement apart from Ryan & Graham’s will they won’t they grandparent/son dynamic and Yaz/13’s communication problems in Flux. I also just genuinely don’t think Thirteen cares much for any of her companions. Obviously most recently abandoning Dan in the past, but also take the example from Spyfall: the Doctor wasn’t worried about Yaz, Graham & Ryan when she was stuck in the past, and we know she hadn’t already hatched the plane save so. She thought they were dead? She assumed they’d found a way out? There was no thought of ‘oh my friends were on a crashing plane, I should get back and check they got out okay’, she goes straight back in to stopping the Master, and it comes across as it’s only when they bring up the plane by asking how she did it that she realises they actually managed to escape? If she doesn’t care why should the audience? They’re all just along for the ride and it’s so goddamn boring.

They had such a good opportunity with Yaz & 13 in the beginning – Yaz is introduced as a kind of bored police officer with something to prove, it would have been so interesting for them to grapple with a bit of a power struggle in the beginning as Yaz tries to assume the Authority position and the Doctor grapples with whether she wants to be like “my ship my rules” vibe or to sit back and let Yaz go ham. Instead they just sort of. Are in scenes together I guess.  

Like, even Ryan & Graham’s relationship, which is one of my favourite parts of the era feels quite forced and formulaic, like they’ve sat down and said “right, in this episode we need a Ryan & Graham scene where he refuses to call him granddad, so later it’s satisfying when he does” rather than letting the characters naturally grow closer/develop. This sort of shorthand character/relationship building is so present through the era too, the whole speech Graham gives about Yaz being the best person he’s ever met: “You said to the Doc that you thought she was the best person you'd ever met. But you know what, Yaz? I think you are. You ain't got a time machine or a sonic... but you're never afraid and you're never beaten. I'm going to sound like a... like a proper old man, but you're doing your family proud, Yaz, you really are. In fact, you're doing the whole human race proud.” is really sweet and nice and I do enjoy their dynamic sometimes I just don’t understand where his POV of Yaz is from because the scripts up to this point haven’t really given Yaz the opportunity to be any of those things (unafraid, unbeaten etc). I’d say maybe in the year where the Doctor’s in prison/Flux but 1. that hasn’t happened yet when he gives that speech and 2. that was all off screen?  

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Which leads me on to my next point, which is, why DOES so much important/interesting character stuff happen off screen?? The Doctor’s time alone in prison and the fam’s reactions to it, Yaz & Dan’s 3 years in the past, Yaz growing/realising her feelings for the Doctor, all happen mainly off screen, the Doctor obsessively hunting down Karvanista at the beginning of Flux. I’ve seen people speculating that Yaz & Doctor had the conversation about the Master & the Timeless Child and all the Flux shenanigans sometimes between EotD and LotSD, and that was their MAIN tension all through last series but I wouldn’t even be SURPRISED if it happened off screen at this point. 

I’m still so frustrated there’s no timeline given for when this Dhawan!Master is at. We are left to assume he’s post Missy, but there’s no mention/interrogation of her arc whatsoever. Any development he had to get him back to his “”evil schemes”” is, again, left off screen. It just feels like such a disservice to Gomez and her Master and the arc she had with 12 to not even MENTION it. Just a mention from 13 of like “oh I thought they’d changed…” to Ryan/Yaz/Graham. ANYTHING. I thought the Master coming back was gonna be the trigger for 13 to finally snap because she’s finally got someone to bounce off of and then she gets him taken off by Nazis (I don’t think the point of like. Why that is so awful needs relabouring lol). 

Ruth/Martin!Doctor could have been so interesting to dive into (holding out for that spin off 🤞) but instead she gets forgotten until like Once Upon Time which mainly overwrites her with Thirteen and then she’s forgotten about again.

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It’s also really annoying in my opinion how the era does so much lipservice to being progressive, especially more so than before, when for 3 seasons the only queer characters were introduced and killed like 2 minutes apart, and Ryan and Yaz were constantly sidelined for Graham’s development, sometimes it even feeling like the Doctor was also playing second fiddle to him, and Grace was introduced only to be fridged (and then like. AGAIN in ITYA) for Graham's (and to a lesser extent Ryan's) development, which they don't even really do anything with except for a few Grief scenes. You'd think a guy his age who's just watched his wife die and who's had longterm health issues might look at his grandson wanting to hop off into danger and have more to say than "yeah guess I'll come along too".

A lot of times it feels like they only bring up things like race, sexuality, gender, disabilities etc as a Theme of the Week rather than being part of these characters/worlds (e.g., Yaz’s MH is only really present in CYHM, Ryan’s dyspraxia gets forgotten about all the time and is written super inconsistently, Rosa and DotP have Ryan and Yaz discussing racism but then in the Witchfinders it’s not a problem (because that’s The Sexism(™) episode). They have episodes like Orphan 55 and Praxeus with the same span they have FUCKING Kerblam!.

I’ve already talked about how disappointing I feel the era is at handling the Doctor being played by a woman, but it also bugs me RE Yaz being queer, is that we have no idea how that impacts literally anything about her or her character (I know it’s a last minute addition so maybe felt like they didn’t have time), we don’t know how she came to the realisation or how she feels about it, how she feels about Dan essentially outing her, whether the bullying/MH they touched on are affected by it. It’s just like ok Yaz is queer! Onto the next bulletpoint for the ep. There’s no depth given to it at all. They randomly drop Yaz is a muslim at one point but again we have no idea what her relationship with that is at ALL?

And obviously having representation for representation's sake can be fine, your whole personality isn’t your identity, but when it’s so often the case that it’s not addressed at all outside of establishing it, it feels so lazy, like they want the kudos for having a diverse cast without having to do any consistent legwork with it.

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Ultimately I think for me this whole era just feels like “oh this idea is cool, hope this pays off later” then being bored/irritated then being like “... was that it?”. It feels like it’s lacking a lot of heart, it all just feels so weak and dull and lifeless and misses every opportunity to do something interesting with the good ideas it DOES have ?? Or what they DO do is just rehashing old stuff, but not as well (Clara/Yaz WWTDD arc, 13’s 10-like traits) or completely ignoring what came before (the memory wipes after what 12 learned with Bill/Clara, Missy/the Master’s development). Even episodes I really liked like FoTJ just don’t work as well on rewatch because you know they’re not going anywhere interesting. 

Sorry if I’ve repeated myself anywhere, been scrapping my thoughts together when I had a couple minutes free but I tried to proof it best I could!

#Thanks for asking #this was interesting for me to really try and piece it all together concisely too<3 #text tag #long post #replies tag #chibnall era #crit #meta #ig ? #its cut out my spaces in formating ):

[sharpegirl]

Content Warnings for 6 TIMES WE ALMOST KISSED

Hi everyone!

It’s that time again! ARC time! Which means I’m releasing the content warnings for my January 2023 release, 6 TIMES WE ALMOST KISSED (AND ONE TIME WE DID)

Remember: there’s no shame in being triggered, there’s no shame in wanting content warnings for books you want to read, and there is NO shame in not wanting to read my book after you read the content warnings! And I will never be hurt because I want you to feel safe and my book might not be safe for you. There are lots of books (and movies and TV shows) that are not safe for me and my triggers. <3  And finally: there is no shame in reading the content warnings, thinking you’ll be fine reading, and then getting the book and reading some and realizing “Nope! Totally not happening!” It’s OK to put a book down that triggers you or has some themes that are too much for you right now (or ever!) or for any reason at all! 

CONTENT WARNINGS BEYOND THIS BREAK:

Some information for you:

6 TIMES WE ALMOST KISSED (AND ONE TIME WE DID) is a YA Romance with dual POV’s. It’s about Penny and Tate, two girls who have always clashed, but whose life paths are forever intertwined because of their mothers’ epic, life-long friendship.

When Penny’s mother is able to become a living liver donor for Tate’s mother, ending her wait for a liver transplant, the girls find themselves in new territory as their families combine their households in order to recover financially and physically together. 

The girls make a pact: they’ll be the perfect daughters during this hopeful and scary time. There’s just one problem: Penny and Tate keep almost kissing.

It’s just a thing that happens. For basically their entire teenaged existence. But some things—and some kisses—can’t stay almosts forever.

On one hand, this is a YA Romance (with a Capital R which means: HEA) about two girls who keep almost kissing and then being super in denial about the situation while everyone around them is like “wow, those two, it’s some soulmate shit.”

On the other hand, this is a YA Romance about two seventeen-year-olds who’ve had to grow up way too fast—because of a parent’s long-term illness (Tate) and because of a father’s death and a mother’s unraveling into grief (Penny).

It’s about the family you choose, the family you cling to, and the family who almost destroys you in order to survive themselves.

In short, if you’ve read my other work, this is a very Sharpe-ish Romance novel. It is not a Rom-Com (alas, I am not funny enough to write a Rom-Com), it’s an angsty Romance novel about trauma, rural medical access, and admitting you’re in love with the person who keeps witnessing your very worst moments, but still sees the good in you. Also there is an almost kiss in a pool, as there should be.

The Content Warnings for 6 TIMES WE ALMOST KISSED (AND ONE TIME WE DID) are below: 

Abuse: emotional abuse and neglect of a daughter by a mother

Assault: a slap (off-page), mentions of an interrupted assault that happened 25+ years earlier, rock throwing.

Medical: mentions of being diagnosed and living with ovarian cancer years earlier, mention of remission, mention of an oophorectomy, mention of death from ovarian cancer, undergoing a living liver donation as a donor and as a recipient, dealing with Alpha-1 Antitrypsin Deficiency, acquiring a tug o’ war injury that nearly severed fingers and required surgery, mentions of physical therapy to deal with tug o’ war injury, dealing with the aftermath of a tug o’ war injury (post-op two years), mentions of suicidal ideation and pain medication being monitored, character with PTSD from experiencing a rafting accident, character working towards a mental health diagnosis.

Death: accidental death of a parent (father) witnessed and survived by the teenaged daughter, mentions of suicidal ideation and pain medication being monitored.

Misc: denial of therapy and anti-therapy and anti-medication attitudes (adult character),

If you have read 6 TIMES WE ALMOST KISSED (AND ONE TIME WE DID) and feel like I missed anything and you have the time, please send me an email at [email protected] and let me know. I want to make this list as inclusive as possible and sometimes I miss stuff! 

#content warnings #6 times we almost kissed #tess sharpe #tess is a delighted dinosaur