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#theres no way to tell if they were really in love or not and if so how much
pixiecaps · 2 days
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recapping a bit of what haru said on stream
haru on her stream spoke about how shes had a really awful past five years and all her experiences just from this past year has been incredible. she gave a massive thank you to everyone and that she has no regrets.
“i never imagined i’d be where i am right now and i mean it with all my heart thank you so much. i had a very good time and i hope to have made you guys happy.”
she mentioned that since she was young shes always wanted to make content that makes people happy because she felt the world was missing a lot of love so shes happy to have given the world a piece of her heart. she mentioned how shes met so many incredible people who motivated her to see the good parts of life. to have found even this little bit of sunshine has left her so grateful. she says thank you for all the kindness, all the moments, all the memories, all the words, everything. shes very happy and mentioned this has been a very special experience for her. she reminded her chat that theres always another day and to enjoy life to the maximum, to live, to love, to talk, to hug each other, to be happy always, and that all the beautiful happiness we’ve given her will be returned back to us. she continues to express her gratitude. she mentioned this is one of the most beautiful communities shes ever had the pleasure of meeting in the entire world. she goes on to include the spanish, portuguese, french, english, german, and korean community in that statement.
“there is love in all types of languages and that love needs to be shared.“
she said her words will never be enough to express all her gratitude. she gave a reminder to always keep being kind. her voice falters a couple times from all the emotions. she mentioned shes cried enough and didn’t want to keep crying since she had something to do tomorrow and she didnt wanna have swollen eyes lmao.
she then shares a more personal moment. paraphrasing here.
“after i lost my dad i swear i felt like my life was falling apart. i never thought i’d be able to recover. after that many things happened and in those things, i wasnt destined to meet two people, this is a story i’ll always remember because i wasnt destined to meet these people. … they tell me hey the actor for this little thing didn’t show up and i say no way seriously? tell them to let me be it, tell them please because i want to be with you guys (harus two friends who were apart of the project). and i didnt think they’d agree… and they said yes. and i met two very important people and honestly (starts crying) thank you so much. thank you so much nussa. thanks to you i was able to meet them. i never imagined this would happen i promise you. thank you nussa. it means a lot to me that you decided to put me (into the leo spot). the only major thing in my life, i started being so happy, i started enjoying all the moments in my life as if it were the last, thanks to all this i’m here. and could meet you all. such a beautiful community.” she goes on to keep thanking nussa while crying and saying it was written in the stars. she goes on to say that shes gonna tell this as a story some day to her family, who doesnt know what she does or that she streams, and she’ll tell them about all of this with so much care and love. shes very thankful to have learned so much english and more about so many different cultures. she again reiterates shes very happy.
she also teases that she wants to go to brazil!!!! which… might be soon… and that theres little things being planned so hopefully if all goes well…👀 (an egg admin meetup would go so hard)
NOW GO SUPPORT HER ON TWITCH @ HarumiVT
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the other women.
word count: 886 (kinda short)
pairing: p.b. x reader
summary: After the live incident with Azzi y/n confronts paige.
pt: 2/3 (I think there will be 3 parts idk)
NOT PROOFREAD SO NTM.
i hope yall enjoy thiss. im gonna remake part 1 because it doesnt really fit with this part too well. i mean its good enough for yall to get the plot of the story but ykkk. SO SORRY FOR MAKING AZZI A BAD PERSON YALL ITS FOR THE PLOTTT🙏🙏 tried to do the lil picture thing evb be doing cs i thought it was cute how we feeling?..
-love gabby💋
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3RD PERSON
Paige wakes up to an empty bed. She blinks rapidly trying to blink the sleepiness away. Wincing as she feels the hangover coming in. She notices the advil and glass of water on the bedside table you left for her. There was ice in the cup indicating the glass was filled not too long ago.
She doesn’t hesitate to pick up the glass and pills and takes them with one big gulp.
YOUR POV
Whenever you’re mind is too loud you usually vent to Paige and cry in her arms. You couldn’t do that this time so you went for a walk. You honestly had no clue where you were because you were so consumed in your thoughts you lost track of where you were walking.
Youre phone pinged snapping you out of your thoughts.
my fav blonde🖕🏻: Where are you?
You stared at the message not knowing if you should respond or not.
Just out for a walk.
You respond dryly trying to let her know you don’t want to speak to her. You hated confrontation so you didn’t know what you were going to do about the whole Azzi situation.
my fav blondie🖕🏻: Thanks for the advil and water, bug.
You stared at the phone not even realizing you were crying until you saw the tear droplet falling down your screen.
That damn nickname. She had given it to you as a joke when you first started dating and it’s stuck ever since. Whenever she called you it, a wave of comfort rushed through your body. Now it was just making you sad.
“You okay?” you hear a semi-familiar voice call out.
You look up quickly wiping your tears and see this girl from your psychology class. Her name was Addie or something like that.
“Yeah” you manage to croak out.
“You sure? Doesn’t really seem like it.” she says chuckling attempting to lighten the mood.
“Yeah. Thanks for asking.” You say smiling.
She smiles back. She was pretty, she had freckles and was brunette.
“Do you need a ride?” She offers still smiling.
“If its not too much of a bother.” You say embarrassed.
“Ofcourse! Hop in.”
PAIGES POV
Guilt is rushing through my body remembering the events from last night. It all happened so fast and it was a mistake.
my baby: omw home. 🤍 (hearted the msg)
my baby: got a ride from this girl
I smiled seeing her notification.
Theres even a video going around and im just praying y/n didnt see it. She could take it the wrong way. I would have to tell her eventually. She just cant find out through a video on social media.
FLASHBACK: AT THE BAR
STILL PAIGES POV
Azzi was being extra touchy tonight but I just assumed it was the alcohol. I mean she knows I have a girlfriend and she loves her.
“Paige, you look so good” Azzi slurs out running her hand down my chest.
I quickly move her hand off of me. “Thanks Azzi.” I say smiling. She puts her red solo cup up to her mouth “I think you’ve had enough to drink tonight” I say grabbing the drink from her.
“Nooooo” She whines. I just laugh at her drunk antics.
She grabs my face and gets really close. “Never noticed how pretty your eyes were.” She says staring at my eyes.
I just smile awkwardly trying to get out of her grasp. Before I knew it her lips were on mine. I gently push her off me. “Azzi.” I begin. “Paige you know you want me just as much as I want you.” She cuts me off.
“I have a girlfriend. And shes the only girl I want.” I say sharply.
“This is bullshit” She spits, pushing herself off of me.
PRESENT TIME
3RD PERSON
“Thanks for the ride.” Y/n says smiling at the brunette. Who smiles back “Anytime.”
Y/n is fumbling with her keys outside of the apartment door trying to find the right one. Once you find the key she puts it in the lock and unlocks the door.
Paige immediately shoots up of the couch and runs to her girlfriend. “Hi babyy.” she says smiling and giving you a hug. “missed you.” she says in your neck.
The feeling of Paige’s breathe on your neck made you shiver.
“Hey.” You couldn’t help but smile, missing Paiges warmth.
You let go of each other and you wander off into the kitchen while Paige goes back to her spot on the couch.
“Hey can we talk?” You manage to say. Paige looks up at you and hums in response already knowing what you’re going to say.
“What happened last night..” You pause and clear your throat “With Azzi?” You say trying to hold back your tears.
“Y/n I promise it wasn’t what it looked like.”
“Then what was it Paige.” You snap all your built up anger coming out. “Because it looked like the love of my life cheating on me with her BEST FRIEND.” You say emphasizing the last two words.
“Please let me explain baby.” Paige says, tears pricking her eyes.
“Don’t call me that.” You say coldly.
“You don’t need to explain anything I saw what I needed to see.” You say before Paige could open her mouth to speak.
You walk out of the door not wanting to make the situation worse.
thank you for reading mwahh!
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arcaneafterhours · 3 days
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in which i try to cut the clark family some slack
did not proof read this bear with me
@womp-womp-waa gift for u
"I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong."
Jessica started therapy 4 months ago. She figured it were for the best, with how much she was working. Regular breakdowns, stress and work was really starting to get to her, and she concluded it would be counterproductive to continue to ignore her problems. Recently, however, she has come with a new issue.
See her son, Aiden, was growing increasingly distant. She supposed she should have seen it coming, with how often her and her husband were away on trips. Jessica had figured he would be fine, he had several things to do. She had made it out just fine with her parents being away, why wasn't he?
"He has plenty to do, friends to hang out with, every gaming console I could find---" She cut herself off with a sigh, bringing one hand up to cover her face. "I know I work a lot, but theres nothing I feel like I can do. I don't understand why he's so distant. Theres extracurriculars, sports, everything of the like."
She stopped again when she caught on to the fact that she had been talking without pause. It was always good to take a break every once and awhile, as she had learned the hard way. Jessica loved her son, he was so talented and smart. And yet he never seemed to be happy.
The woman before her nodded slowly to her words. "What extracurriculars does he do?" She asked, avoiding Jessica's gaze in favor of writing notes on her clipboard.
A mental list almost wrote itself in Jessica's mind. "He plays soccer, he takes violin and piano lessons. Oh! And recently he's started archery," She began, mentally counting off whatever she could. "Honors classes, chess club, the schools student council---"
"And how old is he?" "Aiden is 13."
"Doesn't that sound like a lot for a boy that age? When did he tell you he wanted to do all of this?"
Jessica took a moment to mull on that. Actually, when did he? Lots of them were originally her idea, he simply agreed to them. That was all she really took. A simple nod, a small agreeing hum. She took that and ran with it.
Her mind started to race before she could catch it. It was all for him, wasn't it? She wanted him to be successful, just like she was. She achieved it with hard work, and by taking advantage of every opportunity she got. That was all she wanted. She just wanted her boy to have a life full of potential she knows he has.
She shut her eyes.
"Am i overworking him?"
---
Jessica cried on the way home from that appointment. She cried often, but not like this. She always cried from stress, from how much she had to get done, it was all so much that she just broke down. But she got it done anyway, didn't she? This time she wasn't sure. She was the cause of her child's problems, and oh how she felt terrible. She needed to fix this.
As she drove home, a memory came to her.
She was young, perhaps a little older than her son is now. She came back to an empty home, only getting a note from her parents that they would be back at an unknown time. Her room was a mess. Thinking now, Jessica didn't know why she didn't think to clean it. Only, at the time she had just come home from a club meeting, and immediately had to get ready for her softball game.
She remembered how exhausted she felt. All the time. About absolutely everything.
And yet, she had done the exact same thing to her son.
Jessica was failing him.
---
It was nighttime. She didn't know if he was still awake. She stood outside his door. She had been for five minutes. Would he even want to see her at this point? She had barely seem him today.
One knock. Then another.
Aiden was sitting on his bed when she came in. She didn't know what he was doing. It didn't look like much. Slowly, she sat down beside him.
"How was soccer practice?" "It was fine."
He didn't sound enthusiastic at all.
Jessica took a moment to observe the boys room. It was a wreck. It ripped her heart in two.
"When is your next trip?" "We leave next Friday." She mumbled. He only nodded, looking away. Jessica took a heavy breath. She needed to fix this.
"Why don't you come with us this time?" She spoke slowly, as if addressing a frightened animal she was trying to keep from running away.
Silence filled the room.
"I can't. I have practice. And lessons. I might have club meetings too."
Jessica found herself grabbing the boys hand. It was that time he finally glanced at her. He looked exhausted.
"Forget all of that. You work so hard, you deserve a break."
He was confused. Of course he was. Jessica had always been a 'work til you drop' kind of person. And it was catching up to her now.
"I mean---"
Aiden paused.
"I don't know."
Jessica leaned down and gave him a kiss on the head. It was something she mainly did when he was little. "Think about it, okay? We would love to have you with us."
Of course, there would be the plane tickets. And the hotel rooms. And adding a level of actual tourist activities, instead of just visiting the area. Maybe they could stay for a bit longer this time, and actually enjoy their travels.
When Aiden didn't reply, Jessica stood.
Before she could leave the room, she paused in the doorway.
"Sweetie," She ended up glancing back at him. "Do you enjoy soccer? Honestly?"
Aiden stared at her.
After some heavy silence, he shook his head no.
"What about lessons?" More silent shakes of the head.
Aiden wasn't happy. And it was Jessica's fault. She was working him to the bone, and didn't even have the time to notice. She wanted to cry again.
"You don't have to go anymore, then."
That actually got something out of her son. Perhaps he perked up, or was just straightening his bad posture. Was she reading too far into this?
"Really?" "If you really don't enjoy it, you don't have to go."
Jessica's mind was screaming at her to stop. A mantra of her boy's future crumbling flooded her thoughts. If he doesn't live up to his full potential, he isn't going to have good opportunities in life. What will people say when he suddenly drops everything?
Her grip on his door handle tightened. Aiden was more important. She forced herself to stop thinking like that. Her son and his happiness was more important than anything.
She glanced at Aiden again. He seemed to relax. Like a weight slid off his shoulders in one fell swoop. And, ever so slightly, so did she.
---
Aiden wanted the window seat. Of course, Jessica got the good seats for them, so they were by no means squished. She still sat near him though, watching him as he switched from staring out the window in wonder, to playing some sort of game on his console.
She wanted to connect with him. How could she? Jessica felt lost. Was she doing the right thing for him? How could she even find an entry point to start a conversation? Her eyes drifted back into the game in his hands.
"What are you playing?"
He blinked at her, startled she even asked. "Uh, its called pokémon."
She tilted his head at him, waiting for him to elaborate. After a moment, he switched seats, coming to sit beside her. He showed her the screen, decorated in colorful pixels displaying what appeared to be two odd animal-but-not-quite-animals in what appeared to be a battle. Aiden started to ramble, telling her about types, and moves, and 'gyms'. Frankly, Jessica understood absolutely none of it.
And yet, she listened anyway. Aiden was smiling now, happily explaining every detail he could, showing her how the game worked and everything. To be honest, she had never considered videogames to be something that required strategy. Perhaps she was wrong.
Really, Jessica was wrong about a lot. But she was willing to learn.
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the-s1lly-corner · 3 days
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Heyo! I saw your requests were open and was wondering if I could add one to your list😁 I would love to see Angel Dust x gn! reader headcanons (or an imagine, whichever best fits lol) where reader volunteers to watch Fat Nuggets for Angel in an effort to impress him? This is before they’re dating and reader is kinda a dork and has a huge thing for Angel😂💕 but feels like Angel never really notices them in that way, so in order to change that, they want to show how much they care about him as well as value how important Nuggs is too. The ending can be really cute and fluffy with Angel giving them a sweet little surprise😘❤️
I hope this isn’t too too specific and please no rush at all! I know you must have as many other requests to get to as well, so take all the time you need and make sure to rest and stay hydrated!😊 THANKS BESTIEE🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼
Reader taking care of fat nuggets for angel
Short post for this one
Notes: reader is masc, reader is crushing on angel, no established romantic relationship
CWs: none
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you had offered to take care of fat nuggets on a night angel was out for an extended period- in fact you were a little too eager to volunteer yourself... not that the spider was complaining, though
taking care of the pig was easy enough, angel had left you some instructions of when to feed him and how much- as well as his favorite toys and games. with a final goodbye, angel departed
you get to play with a piglet, hooray! fat nuggets seems like the type of pet to curl up in your lap while you sit and work/watch something
angel returns roughly at the estimated time he said he would return
checks in on fat nuggets before turning his attention to you
if you took extra good care of nuggets and left him in a good mood, angel is quick to notice
he thanks you, and gives you a quick peck on the cheek- though whether it was by habit or to work with his façade or if it was genuine was a little hard to tell- but the smile on his face seemed real enough
side note angel dust would be the type to tease you for having a crush, but only a little... inside theres some turmoil but thats another post!
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ashascoven · 22 hours
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☽ ✯ venture x witch! reader pt. 1! ✯ ☾
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✯ welcome to my first venture fanfic ever!! ╰(*´︶`*)╯
✯ my venture fixation and endless fanfic reading of them has led me here, hours deep into writing my own...
✯ now that im typing this at 4 am on a school night.. i might have to post this in multiple parts..... 23 pages of fanfic that's still a wip uh oh!!
✯ ahem, i hope theres some fellow venture lovers out there who'll enjoy this! happy reading! :D
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☆ FANFIC DEETS! venturexreader ☆
reader is a female who practices witchcraft! i wrote her that way because i also am a witch irl! :,)
VERY lengthy build-up fanfic (LOTS of reading.. i type a lot i think?)
venture is referred to as sloan <3
lifeweaver is besties with the reader, referred to as niran!
everything related to witchcraft here may be exaggerated / inaccurate for fanfic purposes.. but i tried writing it all into an experience > just reading!!
eventual ritual smut....
feel free to hmu, hope u enjoy :D
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For every night that the full moon showed her face, the couple would be outside to accompany her. •°. *࿐
They'd bask in her glow to the grounds below, cherishing the energy of grace that she brings with her starry companions and practicing gratitude with her.
Both of them would dance around in the grass with bare feet, laughing away at each other's joys until they're so dizzy that they land into the planet’s arms, hand in hand, heart to heart. 𓆩♡𓆪
Gazing at the shapes of the misty clouds above their heads, they'd point out whichever ones reminded them of each other with giddy smiles on their faces.
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Sloan would roll over with that sweet, chipped grin of theirs, facing you and holding your face gently.
Their thumb would run along the corner of your lips, eyes sparkling at how much they could just take you under the skies right now. 
“ah, mi cariño, you're so.. beautiful. no crystal in the world could ever compare to your beauty.”
You'd turn to face them, putting your hand above theirs with a blush on your face.
“oh, sloan! you're too kind, my charming agate..”
“anything for the gem that makes my heart race.”
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The two lovers would giggle at their silly rock jokes, holding each other close under the night’s gentle breeze. 
Never wanting their time together to end, they'd lean into one another, eyes fluttering shut as their lips meet once again. 
The natural softness of your lips pressed against theirs sent shockwaves through their body, none that their drill could ever replicate on a battlefield. 
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You made them feel so warm and loved inside, especially with the way your hands made it to their hair every time you two kissed.
It felt like the world had stopped, and all they could process was how needingly their hands moved all over your body in response, taking their time with each mark, crease, and even speckle of hair.
They loved everything about you after all.. each “flaw” of yours was just another spot that they had the honor of touching and kissing. <3
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They'd pull back for a breath, but really it was just to take you in once more.
“you’re so special to me, mi vida, you know that?”
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The moon was going to show herself at her fullest tomorrow, but curses, you were dreading her appearance..
“something's brewing.. tomorrow won't be a good day, i can feel it.” You mumbled to yourself, glaring down at the black candle you held with its own silver plate. 
The flame that once stood still flickered at your words in response, emitting up to you in what felt like commiseration.
“mm, something's gonna happen, right? go on, you can tell me~..”
You poked your index finger at its flame in a petting motion, watching as the flickering intensified. The shape of the fire leaned away from your touch in shame.
“don't be sorry, it's not your fault.. shh..”
You tilted your head at it and cooed with a comforting tone, holding the candle closer. 
The flickering stopped and the size of the once spirited flame dimmed down into a ball of burning light.
Moving your gaze back to the rain outside of the window you stood in front of, you sighed.
“just, please protect them for me, okay? i know you can do it, take this and keep them safe..”
You held the candle steadily in front of your face, careful not to drop it with one hand. 
The other hand reached down into the drawer of your altar’s nightstand, pulling out an old, used incense stick.
With the edge of it, you used the dripping wax to draw out a sigil onto the body of the candle, whispering an affirmation in hopes that it reaches the universe in time.
Then, you placed the candle down, thanking it for letting you borrow its energy.
You looked back at your sleeping lover, resting peacefully in the bed you two shared.
They hugged a pillow that you had nudged in place of where you were laying, already drooling all over it. Their hair was a mess and their body already took over most of the bed.
Yeah, they were just in a grey T-shirt and purple boxers with lightning bolts patterned onto them, but god, they were such a sight to take in.
You smiled, before looking back at the window and its altar, your heart feeling a little lighter for the night.
“yeahh.. they'll be alright.”
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“moorningg sunshiinee~! (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )”
“mmhh.. whehh..”
“i mean, it IS raining.. but i made you sunny eggs anyway!”
“actually, i dunno if they're.. exactly.. sunny? they're all nice and poached up for you though! (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ”
You felt a plate nudge at your side, earning a groan out of you.
“c’mon mi corazon! you gotta eat something!!”
“por favoorr!!! pleaasee wake up, i wanna hug you before i go! (っ´ω`)っ”
“whuh- huh??”
You finally budged at the gloved hands that were lightly shaking at your shoulders, pushing them away.
Squinting at their blurry face, you rubbed your eyes to get a better view of the person in front of you. 
“before you.. go? you don't normally leave this early, sloannnn..” You yawned, looking up and down at their work clothes in confusion.
They had a different color jacket on today, but your tired mind didn't think to question it, figuring it was because of their job.
“yeahh I knooww my love, but there's some.. new ruins that my buddies found at work..! r-really important duty calls, and history awaits!”
“here, eat this for me! please?” They grinned, holding the plate in front of you as you sat up.
“mmh, promise me you'll stay safe baby.” You shoved a piece of burnt toast in your mouth without really looking at it.
“of couurrssee, y/n! don't you worry your little pretty head about me, i'll be fiiinee~ (つω`。)” They sat the plate down next to you, wrapping their arms around you and snuggling their cheek on top of your head.
“mmhmmm, you better be, or i’ll keep every mirror and glass in this house covered when you're dead!” You reached up, playfully smacking the top of their head.
“nooo!! :( how am i gonna talk to you when i’m a cool mummified spirit thennn?ヾ(  ̄O ̄)ツ"
“no matter how much your ghost bangs on my crystal ball, screaming ‘y/nnn!! mi amooorr.. my priiinceeessss!!! myy woorlldd!!’.. you'll be talking to yourself.”
“baby nooooo :((, pleeaaase don't abandon me like thaatt, really! don't worry about me, i’ll bring back goodies for you n’ everything! (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ” They pecked your lips, holding your face with the cutest puppy eyes ever.
“awwe, fiinnee. i believe in you, sloan.. i won't curse you with being a lonely spirit.. yet. (´-.-`)” You joked, your hands making it on top of theirs. 
They rolled their eyes, continuing to make a mess of your face with their honey-coconut chapstick.
You happily absorbed all of their pouty kisses like a crystal soaking up a person’s energy. 
You could've sat there and let them kiss you awake forever..
..but unfortunately, the excavator had a job to do.
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With one last kiss on your lips, they hurried over to the bedroom’s closet, snatching up a backpack and their signature drill from it, and they waved their way out of the door.
“alright baby, i gotta go now! i love you, i miss you already! (´ ε ` )”
“oh-! i love you more! thanks for the food! ( ´ ∀ `)ノ~ ♡” You blew them a kiss.
“nonono, thank YOU for leaving those drinks by the window for me! :D” They peeped their head out of the doorway one last time before rushing through the house.
“don't forget to tell the bugs goodby- WHAT.”
“LOVE YOU MOST!! (o^ ^o)ノ”
“SLOAN!!????”
“IMSTEPPINGOUTTHEDOORNOW,BYEBABYCAKES!MUAHMUA-”
You watched them scurry down the road from the window, familiar looking jars clutched in their arms with a grin on their face..
They just took your jars of moon water to work.
You've been carefully curing those jars with salt under the moon light for literal years.
What the fuck.
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With your palm now on your face, you sighed.
“there's no way they just- okay.”
You pressed your hands together and closed your eyes.
“i won't sacrifice them to the gods in their sleep tonight i won't sacrifice them to the gods in their sleep tonight i won-”
The smell of egg and toast hit your nose, making you look down at your side.
The plate of breakfast was still sitting there.
“oh, hm.” You picked up the fork and sliced an egg open with it, watching how the yolk oozed out slowly, inviting you to enjoy it. 
‘chef sloan, huh?’ You raised a brow, bringing a piece of it to your mouth.
‘did they.. try poaching eggs this time? weird, i thought they were in a hurry.. it’s cooked wel-’
You immediately stopped chewing, the slight taste of metallic water failing to compliment the wetness of the actual egg.
You felt your right eye twitch, hoping that the egg wasn't boiled with what you thought it was.
It was then that the adventurous Sloan Cameron was destined to die by the hands of their own lover.
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They jogged through the rain in a hurry, abruptly halting at the bus stop they almost just ran past.
They knew you would've gotten onto them for not taking an umbrella, even more for snatching up their water jugs, but they figured they'll make up for it by kissing you all over later.
With their bags strapped on, drill in their hands, and their girlfriend’s jars now burrowed in their pockets, they were amped for their own little mission awaiting them at a site reserved for the Wayfinder society. 
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See, they weren't actually called for any “important duties” at work, nor were any new ruins discovered.
Rather, they had their own plans for today's solo expedition, and that included secretly taking a trip down an untouched mine.
It was near one of the less active dig sites at their main workplace, hidden under old, giant tires that probably haven't been moved for years.
How did they find it? More like, how didn't they?
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Their bus arrived, and they climbed on, paying for themselves and the one other person behind them with a ‘oh, don’t sweat it!’
They casually sat down towards the front of the bus, careful not to bang their filled pockets against anything, and sighed in relief. ( ´ ▽ ` )
Them and their drill both took up four seats, all dripping wet from the rain outside. 
Some people gave them looks, but they were oblivious to it, one hand patting their drill while the other held the edge of their seat.
They looked to the front window of the bus with a smile, bopping their head side to side while thinking of you. (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b
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Any worries about being found or getting in trouble for working on a site alone was out of the window; today was a paid day off for workers in the society.
But Sloan? Oh, Sloan Cameron was the most committed and daring worker that the Wayfinders had. 
If they weren't invited to anything for the holidays, they'd gladly spend their days putting in more time at work, not caring whether it was even meant to be a work day or not.
If they felt like digging, they could dig that!!!!
No one else at work ever minded anyway, their proven ability to work efficiently and optimistically is what earned their reputation of being reliable enough to be left alone.
Uncovering stories of the past cost them nothing more than physically getting active until they felt like bugging their girlfriend to cuddle them to bed.
..Sloan only ever really took their days off if it meant staying home with their beloved now.
Otherwise? They essentially were paid really well just to do what they love; collecting pretty rocks and bones for their lover, going on fun expeditions for their love of archaeology, and building big muscles in the process.
It was a triple-win in their eyes, they wouldn't have life any other way. No bad day or sudden curse could ever change that..
(TELL ME THEY WOULDN'T CALL IT A TRIPLE WHAMMY!!!!!!)
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Oh, how they felt themselves warm up at the thought of their goddess at home, but quickly shook their head, reminding themselves why they were here at this specific site.
To think that such a cave with so many marvelous finds was right under everyone's noses was bizarre to them.
Sloan was so happy that they were the only one to know about it, gushing to themselves about all the crystals they'll bring home for their witchy wife to work with. 
They let their mind wander again, imagining the smile you usually have on your face from their grand returns home. 
Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→ Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→
You'd rush out of your little sanctuary shack that was on the side of the house to the sound of the doorbell, nearly breaking through the wall to wrap yourselves around them, kissing their dirt-covered face without a care in the world.
‘welcome homee babyy, i’ve missed you soo much, muah muah!! how was work? anyone i need to curse today? are you hungry?? thirsty?’ 
They chuckled to themselves at the thought of your voice, unconsciously rubbing a hand on the side of their face with a ‘shucks.. (ง ื▿ ื)ว..’
They thought about how you'd take quick notice of the extra bag they've come back with, panicking and offering to help them carry their things inside. 
Then, they'd shush you, shuffling over to the living room mat to empty said mystery bag, revealing an endless galore of a crystal witch’s dream.
From that point on, you'd probably tackle them down and they'd laugh, laying there to suffer the wrath of your kisses with no complaints.
Their imagination strayed towards admiring you.. how kissable your neck always is, how holdable your waist was… how much they wanted to take in the view of you on top of them and absolutely devour-
Nonono, they had a mission right now, and that was to acquire stones for their magical wife!!! ⸜(*ˊᗜˋ*)⸝
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Sloan eagerly lowered themselves down into the tunnel of the cave, rope in one hand and flashlight in the other.
Their mining goggles were on, their backpack was on their back, and their jackets were off, leaving them in a white tank top. The jars they stole borrowed from you were now in the pockets of their pants.
Water and sweat dripped all over their arms and neck from how humid it was, but they were too excited to care.
They quickly scouted the place out like a sailor, the grin on their face growing at the sight of all of the crystals already visible to the surface.
It was like this mine was carved out for them, each colorful gem crying out ‘take me home to your lover!!! (」°ロ°)」 take me home to her!!! (」°ロ°)」’
Oh, did Sloan listen to their pleas alright, setting their bag and jars down near the entrance, instantly getting to work with their handy pickaxe.
They would've used their drill, but they stuck to pickaxes for these types of missions, wanting to bring home actual clusters of gemstones for you and not.. pellets.
Besides, whole rocks would be easier to preserve in water than crumbs, right?
Everytime they brought their pick down to the deposits of stones, the grin on their face widened in joy.. It was probably bright enough to start emitting light in the darkness of the mine.
The sound of the axe hitting the ores was music to their ears, so they kept swinging and chucking each one of your gifts into their bag, not a single worry in the world to bother them.
“ooohh, myy y/nnn! i can't waaiitt to bringg these homee to youuu~!!◝(⁰▿⁰)"
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“i can't wait until they get home so i can kick their ass.”
You crossed your arms with a huff, staring in disbelief at the jars of moon water that were, in fact, missing.
Only one jar remained, and it was in the sink, empty.
Your eyes made way to the pan left on the stove, some pieces of egg still floating in the foggy water.
Your right one was probably still twitching, but you were just too distraught to notice.
“is this what i was having those feelings about?”
You clenched your fist, bringing it down to the counter.
“today was feeling off because my own partner decided to.. snatch ALL of my jars on the way to work.. as if that's something they normally do!?”
You looked at your flytrap plant pet that sat nearby, shrugging in a ‘wtf’ kind of way.
One of the plant’s traps closed themselves in response, slightly seeping downwards.
“ugh, i know, right?! it beats me why they'd just.. DO that, ya know?”
Another trap closed themselves, joining the first one in silently chiming in and sagging down.
“see, i really want to trust in sloan, i love them with my entire life! anndd afterlife! but.. also, who the fuck just steals a witch’s water?! not even a burglar would do that!”
“like, i was curing those for years, man! if sloan lets sunlight touch any one of those jars, i'll curse them for eterni-”
Both of the closed traps opened quickly in unison.
“..you're saying i.. shouldn't? curse them?” You raised a brow, a hand now on your hip.
The plant pods closed themselves back, not dipping their heads downwards this time.
“hm. i guuueeess that's true.. i was considering the voodoo doll approach to really teach em’ a lesson but.. you're right.“
“i can just sacrifice them another day.. today can be ass-kicking, tomorrow will be their downfall.”
You finished with a grin, starting to put some plates away as the flytraps reopened their mouths, sitting as if nothing had changed.
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After a couple minutes of washing and drying used dishes from the night before, you felt something soft rub against your leg.
“wha- oh my gosh!! hii squuiishhyy!!” You squealed, lifting up the fat, fluffy creature that nudged its head on the back of your calves.
It wasn't exactly a cat.. or a dog..
Actually, it was a raccoon, a big albino one, and he was here to distract you from the bones you had to pick with your partner.
“myyy fluuffyy companionn, how aare youu?? :D”
You snuggled him, rubbing his face against yours.
He kind of just.. didn't react, cutely letting you hold him with a neutral •ᴥ• on his face.
Then, another soft creature rubbed against your ankles.
“aahh, spaaarkkyy!! my other fluffy companion!! what about you? how aree youu doingg todaay?? >:0”
You smiled, lifting it up to rub the other side of your face.
It wasn't a raccoon this time, but a black possum, and he had a white patch of fur in the shape of a star on his back!
He curled himself into your grasp with what seemed like his own little smile :0)
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Both of the pets were adopted and well taken care of by you and Sloan.
Your partner found the possum on the way to work one day, insisting they kept him and named him Sparky because of the way his pointy teeth sparkled.
They couldn't stop running their fingers along his teeth for weeks, having to be dragged away by you for the possum to find some peace.
‘look at how razor sharp they are!! do you think his teeth could bite my fingers off?! id pay him with food, then i could get cool omnic prosthetics-’
‘sloan! that'd be-! ..messy actually, if you're gonna get blood everywhere, at least let me hire a vampire first.’
‘mi amor.. :( vampires only really existed centuries ago! how would you even find one for me right now? are you gonna make one of those cool pacts or something??’
‘id sacrifice you to one from the pas- nevermind, ‘cause you'd probaablyy want that, so i’ll just.. pretend to sacrifice you and not actually do it. (っ˘ω˘ς )’
‘nooOOO!!!! >:((((‘
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As for the raccoon, you had found him while having a cleansing session in the woods, luring him with fruits and veggies that you had originally brought along for any wandering fae.
(You also made sure to come back later that day with more goodies as an apology to said spirits, leaving them with fruits, nuts, and honey.)
When you brought him home, you named him squishy, simply because he was fat and.. well.. squishy.
Sloan tried to play with his teeth, followed with their failed attempt at getting the two new pets to play a game..
‘y/n, look! they both have the cuuteestt baby hands!! that gives me an idea..’
‘you hold sparky like that ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ, i’ll hold squishy like.. this! ʕ •̀ ω •́ ʔ we can play rock-paper-scissors! here, this'll be rock..’
And with that, you two now lived with Squishy and Sparky (and other pets being your plants & their bugs too).
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A doorbell going off ended up interrupting your moment with your companions, earning a startled jolt from you.
‘oh? who could that- oh my stars-!’
“i forgot niran was coming over! Σ(O_O)”
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✯ if you've made it this far, thank you for reading! <33
✯ here is the link to part 2!!, also on my profile.. here are the borders used!
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✯ enjoy your day/night, stay hydrated, and keep loving venture <3
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kazperthegh0st · 2 days
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RaTing TMA season 1 episodes
001: Angler Fish, the cigarette and disappearance one. Not very memorable. 5/10
002: Do Not Open, the will power this one man contains is greater than God, i swear. I probably would have opened that coffin tbh. 10/10
003: Across the Street, to be Grahm or Not to be Grahm, that is the question. Eating paper is not really my thing but you do you. 8/10
004: Page Turner, kinda boring to me but it introduces important people. 4/10
005: Thrown Away, it reminds me of that one short FNAF story where the girl finds her real body cut up in garbage bags. I liked this episode. 9/10
006: Squirm, I have no memory of this episode. 2/10
007: The Piper, All i remember is rats, a dead dude in a dumb ditch, and The Great War. It was a good read tho. 4/10
008: Burned Out, There was a Spooky Tree, an apple, and a box ( i think it had a necklace in it??). There is also the religious dude— i think hes also the jesuit dude that killed two people in a later episode but i could be wrong. 5/10
009: A Fathers Love, this one was so sad to me ngl. I have two questions: What happened to the mother (i know she died but theres gotta be more)? and also whats the necklace all about ( i might be crazy but wasn’t it in the box in burned out?)? I do think the dad is somehow innocent, like he was possessed or smth. 10/10
010: Vampire Killer, this was a cool, fun episode and I enjoyed the different approach to Vampires. 9/10
011: Dreamer, We hear some new stuff about what happened to Jon’s predecessor, outside of that its an ok episode. Elias is mentioned. 5/10
012: First Aid, don’t remember this episode at all but i looked at the episode tag on here and Gerry is in it so on principle it gets a 5/10
013: Alone, my mind is so blank about this episode. Jon was nice tho. 2/10
014: Piecemeal, i don’t remember it well but Tumblr tells me it was good. 5/10
015: Lost Johns’ Cave, this reminded me of those tiktok videos about idiots who get stuck in caves. But at the same time this episode was deeply unsettling and sad. 10/10
016: Arachnophobia, proof that spiders do not die no matter what you do. Lazy ass cat ( Major Tom, great name, unintended David Bowie reference ) 8/10
***All previous thoughts were made well after the episodes were read so i could be wrong or forgetful regarding some details.***Future thoughts will be made immediately after, or the same day as reading the episodes.***
017: The Boneturners Tale, more of the weird books. I think there was arson in this episode (?) 5/10
018: The Man Upstairs, This one was absolutely disgusting (in a good way?!?!) it made me want to throw up but at the same time was sooo cool. 8/10
019: Confession and 020: Desecrated Host, putting these two together. Why is there such a strong theme of cannibalism and removal of body parts in this podcast? It was really interesting and well written. 8/10
021: Freefall, not that interesting to me ngl. It wasnt bad tho 5/10
022: Colony, MARTIN!!! A real character! He is a sweet innocent baby who can do no wrong. The episode itself was super unsettling. Who is the woman again tho?
023: Schwartzwald, this was boring, sorry. I know i should have found it more interesting cause its a letter for Jonah Magnus but it just wasn’t appealing to me. 2/10
024: Strange Music, I love the aesthetic of Pipe Organs, always have. (Why is it now in the institute?!?!) the creepy dolls and the circus clowns were cool. I love that the movers came back again, kinda odd but thats expected. 10/10
025: Growing Dark, not too memorable but there is now another missing person. (Yay). 4/10
026: A Distortion, SASHA!!! Another Real Character! Nothing had better happen to Jon or Martin or else. I love them too much. Micheal seems interesting too. 8/10
027: A Sturdy Lock, the first episode I listened to while reading the transcript. Is there or is there not a lock on that door? Bro should invest in a pet tho. Average episode but still good. 7/10
028: Skin Tight, wasn’t Cambridge Military Hospital in another episode? Also who is the archivist? The voice ( im listening and reading ) is different from Jon’s and is not female so not Gertrude. Sarah Baldwin is also a familiar name. Skin peeling. Lovely. (Sarcasm) 10/10
029: Cheating Death, reminds me of 007. I think its neat that the person making the statement had the Institute write it for him. This was a cool story. I like how much of it was a folktale and then it took a turn. 10/10
030: The killing floor, oh the delights of the meat industry. What was up with Tom Haan tho? Why did he kill himself? Why is there a living meat pile?!?! 10/10
Shortly after listening to that episode i made steak. While making steak i listened to the next two.
031: First Hunt, I kept thinking of that “Run Rabbit” song. Im glad humans dont have natural predators. But as an American (unfortunately) as soon as I heard where this was and the guy made note of the whistling… I knew he was screwed. Jon is so dissmissive tho. First episode where i only listened to it. 10/10
I have no idea why the previous story made me decide to cook steak.
032: Hive, this wasn’t much of a real statement but proof that Jane is crazy. It was just “insects do be buzzing” the noises in the background were upsetting. (Listened only while cooking a steak) 10/10
033: Boatswain’s Call, We meet Peter Lukas ( who may or may not be Elias’s Husband? I saw it in a Tiktok ) and I think it was slightly unsettling how they all loaded into the lifeboat. Did they vote the dude out or something? (Read and listened) 8/10
034: Anatomy Class, body snatchers named John/Jane Doe traumatize a professor. I love how they’re all trying to pump their hearts to figure out how they’re supposed to beat. Im a big fan of anatomical sciences. (Read only) 10/10
035: Old Passages, It’s Gerry on the hunt for Leitners books! Another dead person and some secret passages. What happened to Jon. Why did the Delivery Duo Dudes show up with a package for him??? (Read only) 10/10
036: Taken Ill, the episode itself was boring to me but the end was interesting. Why is there a lighter, that i assume has connections to The Web? What does Elias want with it? (Read only) 7/10
037: Burnt Offering, boring. Sorry. Could the wicca and voodoo stuff in the woods be related to Jane? (Read only) 5/10
038: Lost and Found, This was Sad. Important things go missing, more so they cease to exist, until eventually its the Husband. Jons fear of spiders returns. And now for the end of Season 1. (Read only) 10/10
039: Infestation, I did find it funny when Jon called himself an idiot. Martin just needs to let my boy Jon be in (SEVERE) denial. Jon is being watched (the eye!) Tim is so excited that he almost died. Its odd. Oooh its Not Sasha! “Archivist.” “Shit.” (I listened to it and then read the transcript) 9/10
040: Human Remains, what did Not Sasha do with the tape… I do know what happened to Gertrude so Elias acting the way he does in this scene is funny. (I listened to it then read the transcript) 9/10
Really good podcast. I liked it.
— are the secret passages from 038 connected in anyway to the tunnels around the archives?
— what was it that got sasha in the end and is real sasha dead?
— does gerard start to pop up more often? As an actual cast member?
— what was Jane looking for in the written files?
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mewtwo24 · 6 days
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You know idk if it's just me being oblivious af but mxtx sure does enjoy putting her protags through the trolley problem when it comes to her works huh /j
#mdzs#mxtx#i say this not to be critical but because she really does prove how time and again#people want a scapegoat and an easy target to blame#and so much of her work is abt proving how faulty these philosophical absolutes are--nothing is that simple.#literally the arguments made to put everything on wwx (at least for now) appear to be faulty at best#i mean sure sometimes he puts his foot in his mouth but like ;;;;;;;; the kid is just doing his best wtf#everyone out here like WWX IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU except for lwj and i'm just like#1. hes literally like 16 yrs old or smth#2. whether or not he stepped in during the cave scene was kind of a non-question??????#the wens were so clearly going to engage in egregeious violence regardless of the rationalizations that came after#pointing fingers is legitimately pointless and fallacious logic#if mianmian wasnt targeted theres really no guarantee smth similar wouldnt have happened#furthermore working tg and refusing to play by wens' rules was p much the only feasible option#lwj was young and afraid and had lost so much but he still had enough clarity to insist on working tg#i also really love what he said abt suffering bc its just true.#the way he claps back to his uncle by saying that nobody would be spared violence and atrocity#the only choice they had was to try to band tg and mitigate the dmg--basically 'war is hell'#i find it such a stark and lovely contrast to the common perception of others abt him#that lwj stands alone and thinks of no one else; quite the contrary#he's v self-contained and v disciplined but he's not indifferent to suffering or apathetic#i think so much of the natural love that blooms between wwx and lwj is rooted in their mutual desire to do good#wwx wants to help--he loves to see people smile. he would do anything to protect the ppl he loves#lwj is honestly the same--he's just more abt structure and stability#wwx is more spontaneous and more attuned to the people around him#im a little shocked that people werent able to tell lwj was just as obsessed with him#just bc wwx is loud and mischievous about his interest doesnt really???? to me mask the ways lwj is so responsive. also i ????????#still don't understand the mental gymnastics of madame jiang insisting it was all wwx's fault when she literally targeted wen's mistress ->#in retaliation???????????????? all this 'pick your battles what the fuck is wrong with you wwx' and she goes and instigates their wrath??#i mean idk fellas i was just sitting there like 'you could have handled this so many ways and you picked the TNT option. wat.'
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the-deadlock-south · 2 years
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good morning yeehan community
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cowboy-robooty · 9 months
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no guys you dont get it itager isnt sweet and tender in the domestic gay lovey dovey way theyre sweet and tender in the BRO way
#im a crazy bitch okay i will be like yes theyre lovey to eachother yes thats true#yes i only get gay and shit for itager bc theyre true love and then see something sappy and gay of them and go THAT AINT RIGHT#im a freak okay im such an asshole about itager bc i think theyre lovey to eachother in a very specific way and all other ways are cringe#me when the only itager i consume is the official goddamn hetalia manga#and them doujins made by corolla that mf was the only person ever who understood them (even if they were misguided and believed in gerita)#i like to think in my heart of hearts corolla knew the truth it was just the wrong time.#like how i know bill and ted wouldve loved touhou koishi song its just they were born in the wrong era#but yeah like germany and italy are gay in that BRO way like. its hard to describe but its not gay its more like.... friendship adjacent#like when you deeply care about your bro and act gay with them in that way they arent about that silently looks at the moonlight shit#they look at the moonlight and italy goes 'germany is right now a good time to tell you i fucked your car again' and germany goes 'What.'#ITS A BETTER AND MORE AWEZOME FORM OF LOVE IN MY HUMBLEST OF OPINIONS.... I PERSONALLY PREFER IT#its domestic in the way of having your average daily life of dicking around with your bros and throwing grenades in cars n shit#instead of domestic settling down and being all serious and sappy all the time#its lovey dovey in the way of being like AHAHA IM HAVING SO MUCH FUN!!! yeah bro... i really like you too *hug* im glad youre in my life#i just think thats so much more swag because settling down just does not sit right for me#i think settling down sucks tf you mean theres no more adventures and always sunny shit?#i think fruk can get into that settling down domestic shit but im a firm believer itager cant#because their entire dynamic hinges upon italy coming in and making germanys boring ass lonely life fun by ruining it everyday#its not itager if they arent grabbing eachothers balls and acting like bros#ive said this to wiener but its the itager itapan juxisposition#itapan (japans onesided crush ofc) is great because they act gay but are just bros#and itager is great because they act like bros but are gay#idk its hard to explain the nuances of it all but just trust me when i say canon content and corollas sfw doujins are the only true itager#content#robooty asshole moment sorry guys somethings wrong with me#robooty kun
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opens-up-4-nobody · 10 months
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...
#hello to anyone who happens to b interested in the saga of my life... also maybe the irl person i gave my url to... hopefully my blog#didnt freak her out too much lol. anyway so its been a busy week? 2 weeks? month? year? life? its been a lot. my parents helped me move#across the country from the desert to somewhere that's beautiful and green. my dad is so jealous of me lol its so so so pretty and theres s#so much to do. will i do any of it? that remains to be seen but im gonna try to be better about that sort of thing. try to get some help#with the thoughts in my head that keep me from doing and enjoying most things. its weird like im decorating my new room which i love. the#location and living situation seem ideal and i really hope i can stay here all 5 years of my program but i was picking a lot of bright#colors and now it feel uncomfortable. like if i wear things that r too bright or my room is too bright without dark contrast it feel weird#like if im wearing it it kinda makes me feel sick. idk what thats abt. anyway. ill try to heal my brain and im just so happy to b out of the#southwest. i was so so so excited when we were leaving thr city and even more so when we left the state. i cant believe im here. in December#it felt like a million years away and i really truely could not fathom how i was gonna survive that long. my thoughts were so distorted. but#i did and here i am. and in like a month i should b starting my phd program and my parents were telling me how excited ppl r for me and#jealous of where im living and im glad. im glad they're excited. i think i am too but its under a layer of: if i get excited it wont happen#im not allowed to b excited or it wont happen. which is irrational but ya kno. anyway so that's yeah. im so happy to have a fresh start and#the town seems super cool. a liberal blip in a sea of... not that so theyre very visibly pride forward haha and i think itll b way easier#for me to get around without driving. and im gonna try to make friends. i need someone to tell me where to get tattoos haha. so yea im happy#but exhausted and i dont wanna go back to work and so so greatful to my parents for being wonderful ppl idk how bc both of them had fucked#up childhoods. like my mum will say the saddest shit and im like bro this is y i don't wanna talk to my grandma fuck her and my dads parents#r so fucked. like my nana is the reason im so fucking control freaked out but i kno i have issues and she has no insight and thinks shes#better than everyone. anyway hopefully i can get back to drawing a posting more now. ive been drawing it its been in a sketch book#like an actual sketch book for sketching big ideas thst r gonna take fucking forever to draw 😭#so that's all. just uprooted my whole life. thats all. but in a good way :-]#unrelated
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higuchisora · 5 days
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Can I say that I didn't really like the Seven of prophecy as a group and felt like their only value as characters from a writing standpoint is to add diversity to the PJO series and that they don't really feel necessary without the rep they add and some of them feel purely constructed to fill archetypal roles/tropes instead of being constructed as whole characters with an actual function in the narrative that no other character could fill or will I be sacrificed at the stake for it
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torsamors · 8 months
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i have got to find more odd ppl here………….
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puppyeared · 2 years
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weird that the shape of love is two beating hearts glued together and not two hands holding each other
#well technically it comes from the shape of two hearts sewn together but i dont know how that translates to romance.. literally its kinda#disturbing but symbolically i guess it is kind of sweet#my friend and i were talking and she said something about someone saying a lover cant just be a friend you can kiss but i think i disagree#i kind of think the point of a lover IS a friend you can kiss because like it must get exhausting having to convince yourself you can only#feel romantic things towards your lover right? i mean i dont know if my feelings are shaped like anyone else's so maybe its more of a case#by case basis. for me id like someone whose hand i can hold and i can make pancakes for them and maybe kiss but like not strictly romantic#and not strictly platonic. and my feelings are all over the place because one day ill be really into someone i like and another day ill be#really chill about it. so its hard to say what i feel for someone if its always changing#maybe thats why i think lovers should be friends you can kiss because its coming from my way of feeling? hmmm#like i want to be able to say i love you and mean it romantically one day and then say love you in a platonic way the next day and itd be#ok?? does that make sense??? like i know its the same phrase but its like the feeling i put with it is different each time. idk#its why i find dating someone hard because its constantly going up and down and its never balanced. itd probably really confusing unless i#were to date someone whose feelings works the same way. just some food for thought i guess but then again every relationship needs work#im not sure if that fits into the category of work though.. i cant tell myself what im going to feel#it just happens and theres not much i can really do about it except tell that person what im feeling. hnnnnnhhgh#maybe its better if i just stick to watching fictional couples work it out lmao#yapping#txt
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camptw1nk · 4 months
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#not 2 be like. negative but i just kinda got hit hard by the way my relationship w my best friend has changed#dont get me wrong i understand that her girlfriend will be super important to her esp bc she lives across the world and is only physically#here for another 2 or so weeks#but my best friend just got back from a trip to another city to see an artist she loves and as she came in i got up to go see her and ask hl#how it was but she was in her room w her gf before i could and thats fine i get it and like she hasnt done anything wrong i can not#emphasize that enough like i hold no bitter feelings to her she is excited to talk to her gf understandably#it just hit me that like. oh yeah. i have no one else that i go to about literally anything but she does#and its less ab her so much as its. its just hitting me that i dont really have? friends?#i have one or two people but like. i only have One Person thats my go to fave person always tell them everything#and i just. I've realized that its not reciprocated the way it used to be#and that i think is just like a part of growing up#i dont have a partner i dont have someone my life is intrinsically linked to#like a best friend is great but its not. relationships are placed to a higher level you know like its jusy more important#and i just. ive nevr Had a partner really. unless u count a like 2 month thing when i was 12 which i dont count#not to be depresso but i am just not the kind of person that people want or desire#and thats been the case long before i came out as trans but its extra complicated now since i dont. Fully pass#idk not 2 sound sad i just wanna be loved#and i think theres only so many times i can hear the most important person in my life come home and talk excitedly ab things thru the walls#and then never actually get told anything myself. not just ab things shes excited for but just in general#we were meant to go to a house viewing together a few days ago and it was only half an hour before it was happening when no one else was#home that i messaged them to check in and they were like oh yeah we're not going we have this and this going on#which like. fine whatever but i dont drive and getting anywhere fast is hard so it just. was stressful#but it just seems like i am constantly out of the loop. everyone i live with is in a relationship w each other and i am just here#in every aspect of my life i am Just There and im tired of it#not to sound desperate or needy but i just would like to. be noticed? or feel prioritized? or even wanted#idk this is. i just needed to rant i think im emotional bc my hormones r a bit wack#im due for my testosterone shot in a few days but i dont have the money or time to go to the doctors lately so its being pushed back#a few weeks and its just. i think its messing w me a bit#i mean i feel this way literally all the time but just the like. the being upset and emotional and posting ab it i think is bc of that#idk i needed to get it out idk it this will stay up or not
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aahsoka · 2 years
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no wait about that rahul kholi vs the r*ylos thing is like …. yea. he straight up only said r*ylo doesnt make him horny. and they got incensed over it. john boyega literally just posted some pictures of rey and kyle FROM THE MOVIES and said ‘star wars romance’ like nothing either of these men said was particularly rude to r*ylos specifically but then said r*ylos piled onto them and later decided the actors were misogynists. for just snarkily replying to unwarranted harassment. (as men of color). anyways
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