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yellowymellon · 2 months

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I BROUGHT YALL ANOTHER CRAZY THEORY

not mine actually it's from tieba, ppl are theorizing that sunday is possibly going to get recruited by elio. fascinating yet crazy right? LEMME LAY EVERYTHING DOWN

okay so sunday's design is very much inspired of ena, both his old one and the new one. it has many eyes, the halo, the golden accents. not to mention his personality that resonates with her path.

this will not make sense if u dont pay attention to elio's concept art (most likely will change by the time he appears but) here it is :

notice the amount of eyes, the sun and the similar patterns, a picture of ena for reference :

they also said that ena seems to be holding a puppet string and it could be related to "destiny's slave", i dont completely agree but it's A COOL THEORY!!

i've always assumed elio to be an omen vanguard of terminus the aeon of finality. since he has blessing/curse of seeing the future unlike finality followers i believed he might be our first finality emenator BUT! emenators could follow a different path, it's so interesting to think he could be a finality emenator but an order follower, and it makes sense! who would greatly seek to stop nanook and restore balance? well hooh too but ena would very much dedicate themselves in stopping nanook. now ena is debatably dead but paths don't disappear. but keep in mind we actually don't know which aeon gives the stellaron hunters powers.

so far we don't know what the stellaron in penacony does, it doesnt seem to be the threat itself but the one who obtains it might be dangerous. that's why elio wants the nameless to go after the stellaron. but that doesnt make THAT much sense either, why wouldn't the stellaron hunters themsleves do the job? they're already capable. if u ask me penacony feels the best place for kafka/SW instead, it might be easier for us to obtain it if we help the family but anyways- we can go on forever abt why it's not right so lets force this theory to make sense tehee~

i talked abt how sunday might learn a truth after his "death", gallagher's voice line abt him is "He reminds me of the "Odes of Harmony," but I caught a whiff of something behind the facade he puts on... something real." the odes of harmony is basically a song praising xipe, he means sunday being a reserved religious saint like person, is a facade and gallagher saw something real. based on my post where i discovered that i'm a follower of nous after all (i'm not-) https://www.tumblr.com/yellowymellon/746431759854551040/you-know-it-would-be-funny-if-the-actual-villain?source=share

gallagher might've caught on it earlier and targeted sunday from all the family heads, if he was going to kill in any case he needed the best victims that could give him the break through he needed, robin might've been just the stepping stone to kill the oak family head (important) who conveniently might be the one to side with him (YALL IM COOKING AND IT'S BURNING)

sunday is described as perfect on the outside but secretly a freak, he shows no mercy to what he thinks is wrong and doesn't compromise. but i don't trust him with what he thinks is wrong. he might be shrewd and manipulative fitting for a head, but still young and emotional to make absolutes (judgements). see, the family is a perpetrator to many MANY evil stuff that shouldn't be in his book (literally lol)

u see where i'm going? me neither elio could potentially need to ally with sunday if his stance changes after learning the whole, purest truth

#elio and sunday? in the same sentence? ITS HEAVEN #maybe it's me coping maybe im unto something (death)#nah ill do 10 last pulls if gallgher comes home this theory IS CORRECT #i saw tiny pic spoilers from 2.2 cuz they're everywhere in twitter and i feel like i'm cooking LET ME COOK PLS WAAAAA #my genius is sometimes too frightening ikik #hsr spoilers #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr sunday #hsr gallagher #if there's typos know that i can't spell #penacony #hsr elio

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lolhex12 · 11 months

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we don't talk enough abt akutagawa's cough / lung disease (chronic&terminal) yet it has so much angst potential?? anywayy

after the current arc, atsushi knows akutagawa is actively dying and he's the only one who does bc akutagawa didn't tell anyone else abt it. (altho, in all honesty, the amount this man coughs should at least hint at it. i'm honestly amazed not more ppl in the story are concerned abt it)

so, the next mission they have together, akutagawa coughs and atsushi is now aware what it really means, so he wonders out loud with nonchalance masking his concern: "hey, so like, do you think yosano's ability would help with your cough and all? would it go away then?"

akutagawa, wiping his mouth, slightly annoyed: "how would i now? i'm not well-acquainted with your coworkers, weretiger, therefore it's none of my concern. and even then, i wouldn't trust any ada members with my issues, nor my life."

atsushi finds his words a bit sus bc 'u do trust me tho', but doesn't say it out loud and they leave it at that.

somehow, it becomes a regular thing. every time they have a mission together and atsushi hears his partner cough, he presents more ideas of how they could cure a terminal lung disease, and they vary in absurdity as he runs out of inspiration.

his ideas range from mere "have you tried going to a doctor?" (<- at which akutagawa stares in disbelief: "you either think i'm an idiot, or you are the idiot. which one is it?" and atsushi pouts bc 'ok yeah, fair... but also, rude') to insanities like "maybe witchcraft would help! i could look up witches in the area and see if black magic or something has any luck." (<- at which akutagawa is so done he doesn't even entertain the idea and just keeps walking)

they never follow through with any idea tho, bc akutagawa stubbornly refuses to waste time on trying to find a cure when his time on earth already is very limited.

it should also be noted that each time the cough gets worse; louder, rougher, more persistent and even bloody, which only makes atsushi more and more worried.

so one time, akutagawa's particularly annoyed by atsushi's insane and stupid ideas. he turns to him and point-blank asks: "why do even care so much whether i succumb to my illness or not? surely, my death should only leave you overjoyed to see the world be rid of one more evil."

that makes atsushi think bc 'why? why does he care whether akutagawa lives or dies? he's right, a bad person like a mafioso dying should be a good thing.'

after lengthy contemplation he comes to the conclusion that he simply cannot have his sworn enemy/rival/partner die from something as pathetic as a disease. someone as strong as akutagawa has to die in a more memorable way - not alone, in a bed, coughing, with nothing more to be remembered by. if anything he'd have to die fighting atsushi or something. yeah that's it. that's why. (<- it's not, but they're not quite there yet)

so atsushi tells him as much. akutagawa accepts it bc 'yeah, makes sense. what else could the reason be?'

the whole routine of coughing and brainstorming a solution in vain continues as the ideas get even more insane, the cough even worse and atsushi more concerned than ever.

the next time akutagawa is annoyed enough to pose the question again, atsushi is close to tears from anxiety as he holds up akutagawa who collapsed and can't seem to subdue his cough properly.

atsushi struggles to get out the water bottle and cough drops he'd started carrying around on their missions together. he's so scared bc he's never seen akutagawa look so sick and frail before (but not weak. never weak. akutagawa could never be weak in atsushi's eyes. it's impossible, bc akutagawa being strong is a simple, unchangeable fact, constant in any possible universe).

what would he do if akutagawa actually died there? in his arms? on a mission? which would probably get cancelled. would the pm think atsushi killed him? does he bring back the body or just bury it somewhere? pretend he got killed on the mission and not by his own body that had turned on him years ago and was in reality a long time coming? he couldn't even bear to think abt it.

"why tf do u care so much??" akutagawa yells with a scratchy voice before his cough continue despite his best efforts to stop.

atsushi can barely breathe anymore. "because i don't want you to die, you idiot! we're a team! you're my partner. who will i be left with if you go?" tears stream down his face, mainly from how overwhelming his anxiety feels. or maybe bc he really doesn't want his partner to die? nah, it's the anxiety. definitely the anxiety. (<- #denial)

akutagawa, at first embarrassed how his collapse derailed their mission bc goddammit he's supposed to be a professional and not let his issues interfere with his job, pauses when he sees atsushi crying... for him? because of him? ???

he's very confused bc he's pretty sure his rival/enemy/partner should not be so concerned abt his health and impending death, but something abt atsushi's expression and that whole situation makes him rethink his outlook on life.

that's when akutagawa starts taking his health more seriously and actively looks for possible, feasible ways to cure his disease, even if there's only a small chance it'll actually work. bc seeing atsushi like that made him realize there are a handful of people who care abt him and would mourn him if he died; more than just his sister and higuchi.

it made him realize his life had a bigger impact on others than he'd previously thought, not all of it bad.

#i'm insane. i wrote this at 4am and it should not have gotten this long. i just wanted to note down the idea not write it out #fml #they're both very much idiots btw. they care but cannot come to the conclusion it could possibly be in a romantic way #only enemies bc 'grrr ure evil' and 'grr dazai likes u better'#they do eventually get over it and start dating dw trust me i can see the future😌👍#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd headcanon #headcanon #nakajima atsushi #akutagawa ryunosuke #shin soukoku #sskk #akutagawa x atsushi #i desperately need to see more chronic illness!akutagawa content bc it's such a good angst source #and best part abt it? IT'S CANON. CANON CHARACTER WITH CANON CHRONIC HEALTH ISSUES AND TERMINAL LUNG DISEASE #like cmon it's. right. there. we just gotta grab it and the magic will happen #just watched the new ep.#ngl kinda disappointed to see how akutagwa's confession abt his disease was portrayed as an off-hand comment. it needed more impact imo #then again. it's bones <- disappointed but not surprised

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cantalooprat · 2 years

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[repost from fairytaile bc its long]

i dont nearly talk abt tbbf enough which is like. completely unfair to it. considering it lives rent free in my head, like how liu-laoshi lives rent free in chi xiaochi's head

its one of those rando wn i came across w the normal pleasant review of "it's soo good, pls read it". n its like. sure. not like i have anything better to do, the art looks good, summary looks fun enough. never touched a danmei QT before but that's alright, i'm a garbage can that eats anything (well mostly anything). but! but there is one problem! and that it's unfinished! so i sadly put it at the back of my read list, and went on to browse other wn that have complete translations.

(also the author wrote as part of the summary: "Sue-ish, fluffy, no logic, not the same as those reforming villain stories, be warned" so i was like... is this rly good... but in hindsight its like, well, it's some kind of author awareness to say things like this, right? n it's like... author, if u say things like this, what of the truly trashy wn out there? author? author...?)

n then i was like... on the support authors discord, randomly browsing the discussion thread, when i saw tbbf recced again. just briefly, nothing big, nothing too deep. n idk what possessed me to just be like. u knw what, i knw full well this wn is not fully tl-ed but let's read it anyway.

initially it seemed like ur run of the mill face-slapping op protag wn which is... fine, those r a dime a dozen but they're not bad. it's wn anw, as long as it doesn't get to the cringe levels of stop bothering me, emperor it's whatever.

but then? cxc is actually a nice guy? he's a QT host, but he rly cares for the ppl whose bodies he's inhabiting. he's cold, calculative, ruthless towards his enemies, but he also really really cares abt the victims of these scum gongs, n i was like, wow, what a guy. have u ever wondered what happens to the original soul when the transmigrator transmigrates into them? chi xiaochi does. if there's even the slightest chance that the original soul is still there... he'd bet on that chance, and strive to make them live better lives. he'll act like them, treat their bodies with dignity and respect, and that's just rly cool of him to do that. in all transmigration stories i've read, no one's ever cared abt the original soul /sad

but like, this is a danmei, n why would i read if not for the romance? the romance doesn't have to be dazzling, but it needs to be convincing, y'kno. and boy does it convince. cxc drops hints here and there, of this person in his world, for whom he has to return no matter what. but here's the catch---he's dead, and cxc has to return because he believes that he needs to keep living on for him, to keep remembering him and sweep his grave when no one else would.

i think this was the scene that rly sold me:

···

"i won't go to a world without him" just kill me dead why don't u?

anw later on i spoiled myself that 061 is lou ying which is... well... expected, and i was like, kinda regretting spoiling myself and tried to self-convince that well the journey is what counts, not the destination, but anw in the long run this spoiler doesn't even rly matter bc the Whole Point is the fkin bittersweet flashbacks to their childhood and How It Parallels Current Events and also the sheer もどかしさ of Knowing that 061 is cxc's lou-ge, but cxc Can't Be Sure About That and 061 is Unable To Tell Him Because Plot. they're like parallel lines that are so close to each other but still unable to touch n their relationship makes me have so many feelings, fuck

in a subset of fiction rife with cold, calculating mcs and devoted mls who seem to love the mc more than the mc loves the ml, it's actually such a breath of fresh air to have an mc who's just wholeheartedly devoted to his (dead) beloved. so many danmei have death-chasing shou mcs who have never known love before, whose behaviors scream "it doesn't rly matter what happens to me as long as i achieve my goals" which is like... i'm not saying don't have goals, but lowkey i feel bad for the mls sometimes (lmao). but cxc's goal is his lou-ge, which is... pretty new for me, or mb i haven't read enough danmei lmao. cxc is someone who's fallen in love before he even knew what love was. he's someone who realized that it was love too little too late, and by the time he's even aware, the only way he could express his love is to keep living so that there will be at least someone who remembers his beloved in this world. he climbs out of poverty, he behaves with a devil may care attitude, he's attained what regular people would call "success" at such a young age, but he can't even have one simple, mundane wish granted. and he's so devoted to ly too---to him, there is only one of his lou-ge, and that's the lou ying in his original world. even if he were to come across a different lou ying in a different world, that person isn't his lou ying. he would only want to catch a glimpse of him and see that he's doing well, and he'd move on so that he can go back to his world, the world where his lou-ge once lived in. chi xiaochi won't stay for any other lou ying from any other world. he would go back to his world and continue to live his life the way he's always done, even if it means he'll be alone.

(and like, we all know 061 is ly, and then one can't help but wonder, man, cxc is so smart, surely he's seen the similarities? and like, he has, he has, but 1. he can't bear harboring even the smallest fragment of hope that his lou-ge is still out there, because what if he isn't? after all, hope could be the cruelest thing of all... cxc doesn't dare believe, in the chance that it turns out he's wrong. the only way for him to believe is for 061 to tell him that he's cxc's lou-ge. and then 2. cxc thinks so lowly of himself. he doesn't like the person he thinks he's become. he thinks he's done all the bad things like "smoking, drinking, acting like a rogue, behaving shamelessly", so far from lou ying's chi xiaochi from back then, and he doesn't want his lou-ge to see what kind of person he's become. but then there are the few moments in which he lowers his guard and just indulges, lets himself dream a little that his lou-ge is with him, and it's just! so bittersweet! that feeling of "i can't bear to hope that he's lou-ge" but also "let me pretend, just for a bit, that lou-ge is still here"! pls!!! and anw 061 loves him the way he is!!!! even before he remembers his identity, 061 was alrd like unknowingly sipping vinegar...)

and 061!!! truly a gem among mls!!!!! gentle, sweet, protective but not overbearing, and just all-around a decent person. just how many ml have thoughts of "if only i could keep my beloved from facing danger" without even thinking of what their beloved wants? 061 doesn't do that. ly trusts! believes fully! in cxc! even when he doesn't know that cxc is the person he's working so hard for, he still trusts in his plans and just does the best he can to make cxc's journey smoother! and after he does find out, he still doesn't do any of that "i'll protect you so you won't be hurt" bullshit, more like he...enables cxc's bullshit. on a tangent, imagine if in mdzs, lwj is as confident in wwx as much as ly in cxc. wwx prob wouldn't have to die like that. 061 works so hard behind the scenes, and cxc doesn't even know. 061 thinks cxc doesn't have to know, so he doesn't have to worry, so he can focus on his own tasks. 061 won't hold cxc back for whatever reason---he believes fully in cxc, and that's why he just makes his own decisions and tries his best to help cxc in his own way.

speaking of working hard, this dude is like, slaving away to come back to the person who's waiting for him, even after he got memory loss and can't remember anything else but the vague silhouette of someone in the deep recesses of his lost memories. like, they just rly love each other, even though one of them doesn't know, and the other one can't say anything. god even the reason why 061 lost his memories is cxc. that point in the story when cxc mentioned that someone claiming himself to be ly promised to meet with him but never showed up and it totally broke him, and how after ly remembers his identity, he vows to never break his promise a third time... sigh. wow. why do i have so many feelings for tbbf lmao

another point i rly like abt ly is how he doesn't even have the ml role in the worlds. in the first and second, they're not quite close enough for ly to rly dip his fingers in. in the third, he's an uncle. in the fourth, he's a fukin mecha. in the fifth, he's... a pair of siblings, and anw the "mc" alrd has a love line. in the sixth, he's a "big cat". in the seventh, he's... the shizun, and also another cat, and anw the "mc" alrd has a love line. like, it's just nice, y'know? that ly doesn't have to be the "romantic interest" to show his bond w cxc in each of the worlds. he knows to separate his personal and professional lives lmao. he's just... there for cxc, no matter what, and i think that's the most romantic thing abt them. the trust and devotion, the synchronicity they have, the 一途な想い. and the pining! and how affectionately exasperated ly is!! rly truly "knightly loyal gong" and "satisfied after being mischievous for a moment shou".

anw tbbf also comes with two memorable quotes, the first of which is chi xiaochi's: "To me, only the Lou-ge from the world I came from is real. I won’t go to a world without him." which is also reflected by the author's self-proclaimed one-line summary of tbbf: "I’ll never go to any world where he doesn’t exist". which is like. well. in essence. that's how it is, isn't it? it's totally not a coincidence that it's also one of the quotes that caught me by the heart and wouldn't let go. the author intended it to be that way, and it works so well.

the second one is this super unreasonable whatever this is:

"I've loved someone before. I loved going up and down the stairs with him, I loved it when he taught me how to play video games, where for every six wins he would never forget to let me win four, I loved when he cooked for me and Dog Meat, I loved when he taught me subjects, I loved when he would cover my ears whenever my parents foughtーーI was never asleep, I was always listening. ……love is when after he died I wanted nothing more than to go with him, but was afraid that other than me, no one else would remember him, so I could only use what bound him to the world to bind myself to it. I lived on for him, and even had to live well."

like who even expected a quote like that to come out of a wn titled "don't pick up boyfriends from the trash bin" not me for sure

the first time i read it i was just like, wtf this is def a memorable quote... i don't even have words for it, who even says things like this, im dying

speaking of bittersweet memories, one of my favorite parallels the author pulled is def the "video game coop mode" flashback that basically mirrors how cxc and 061 are in the current events even when cxc doesn't know 061's real identity and 061 can't reveal his real identity to cxc:

···

because... cxc misses that coop mode more than anything... even after he's "gotten used to" the "solo play" of "the game of life", he just wants his lou-ge by his side again. i love that it's such a meta thing, that the entire wn! he's literally playing coop mode with his lou-ge! but he doesn't know that and ly can't tell him! it's so! vexing! this is basically how i feel the entire time i'm reading!!!

i have no words to end this insane rant with, have some songs i headcanon as cxc>>ly songs:

ref:rain by aimer

niji no kanata ni by reona

ame ni utaeba by reona

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madmaddyenby · 3 years

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/rp /dsmp

ok so- c!tommy. we are all aware he’s traumatized, and experiences ptsd from being in traumatic experiences, this is basically fact. while i’d like to talk how c!tommy experiences ptsd, i’d like to bring up a thing i haven’t seen mentioned a lot when it comes to c!tommy and his trauma- c-ptsd. also known as complex-ptsd. it occurs when someone experiences something traumatizing for a period of time.

[image description: A screenshot of text with the words “CPTSD stands for Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. It is a mental health condition in which a person might experience intense PTSD symptoms that coincide with other mental issues. CPTSD occurs in people who have been subjected to on going traumatizing experiences”. end description]

which, as we know, the exile arc fits the description of “ongoing traumatizing experiences” pretty fucking well. the exile was basically just two weeks of trauma. for a lot of reasons too, there was dream abusing tommy, tommy being isolated, tommys own depression/suicidal thoughts/bad mindset in general. this would all be considered a ongoing traumatizing experience(s).

ptsd is very similar to c-ptsd in how it develops, but ptsd occurs after one singular traumatizing event . (by the way, the event doesnt have to be life or death, it could be something like witnessing or hearing about a shocking event!!!)

symptoms of c-ptsd overlap with ptsd a good lot of the time, due to them both being trauma disorders. however, there are a few differences. here r some symptoms of c-ptsd, alot of which are ptsd symptoms that alot ofpeople with c-ptsd experience as well

reliving the traumatic experience

avoiding certain situations

changes in beliefs and feelings about yourself and others

hyperarousal (jitteriness, being on alert, etc)

somatic symptoms (physical symptoms with no underlying cause)

lack of emotional regulation

change in consciousness

negative self-perception

difficulty with relationships

distorted reception of abuser

loss of system of meanings

now, i’ll go over which of these fit our boy c!tommy, and how they fit for some of them atleast. i will only be talking about the things that are a result from c-ptsd, but also c-ptsd works where it coincides with other mental illnesses a person has so. its also important to note that within a person these symptoms might not stay the same over time, and not everyone who has c-ptsd or ptsd is going to experience it the same. (so not talking abt how pain affects him after dying in the prison, though that is a clear sign of ptsd)

reliving the traumatic experience

tommy’s done this with exile a few times, when revisiting logstedshire, when he saw the craters in logstedshire, when visiting dream in prison, when during the disc finale dream dug the hole and told him to put his armour in, etc etc, he’s even described himself as being trembly in the fingers near plain biomes, while visting logsted he mentioned how shaky it made him to be there, and when he visited logsted one time he had an immediate reaction to seeing a hole in the ground that came off as him reliving it. flashbacks come in from sensations during a traumatic event, like sight, feeling, emotion, etc, etc. it seems like with these he’s experiencing more of a reliving the emotions kind of thing.

avoiding certain situations

i was originally not gonna include this one, but thinking about it, he kind of does in a way. this symptom also includes keeping yourself preoccupied to avoid thinking about it, which is something c!tommy seems to do alot. with focusing on building the hotel, and doing tasks, or grinding for supplies instead of actually thinking about it.

changes in beliefs and feelings about yourself and others

c!tommy uh. does this a lot. a lot of it stems from how during exile tommy was isolated and made to believe no one cared for him, and even if that wasn’t true c!tommy never really got much closure on that. hes not really trusting ppl that b4 were really close to him, tubbo n ranboo for example

lack of emotional regulation

this can also be described as uncontrollable feelings. this is the one i’ve wanted to talk about the most i think- because this is really fits c!tommy. he tends to lash out alot, for example burning the flower c!ranboo gave him, there are a bunch more examples of this that include him yelling at others, that one time when he spleefed c!jack

negative self-perception

yeah. theres a few examples of this one, the one that first comes to mind is that time during the green festival where he was talking about how he was worse than everyone he didn’t wanna be (including his abuser, c!dream...) . theres now when he was building his tower by the prison when he was saying he couldn’t use the cobble because it was too him, and people didnt like the cobble. alot of this i think comes from c!dream making him feel basically worthless in exile :(

difficulty with relationships

Yeah. um. Alot for this one!!! The first to come to mind is c!tubbo. c!tommy and c!tubbos relationship is very very wonky, especially considering recent events with tommy feeling like he is being replaced with c!ranboo. (which he isnt by the way! he just feels as though, which is a valid feeling for him to have :]) . another person that comes to mind is c!ranboo. he’s even mentioned how his and ranboos relationship goes back and forth quite alot. its not very surprising to see that he has difficulty with relationships especially considering a lot of the reason that the exile affected him so badly was because he felt so alone and was so isolated from his friends. another thing that comes to mind, is when he made c!sam sign that contract promising hat he’d be his best friend and protect him. theres most likely way more that can be said here, but this is the first stuff that comes to mind.

distorted reception of abuser

um... yeah. this one. this can also be described as , “ becoming preoccupied with the relationship between you and your abuser. It can also include preoccupation with revenge or giving your abuser complete power over your life. “ which is um. yeah. c!tommy. he’s mentioned how whenever he’s around c!dream he feels like hes conditioned to be his friend (which. yea . he was .). right after he left logstedshire this was very very prominent, he was the biggest c!dream apologist around (/j), saying things like “dream didnt do anything wrong” and even explaining how he wasnt sure about things when it comes to c!dream, that his mind became flip floppy whenever he thought about him. right now, hes focused on getting back at c!dream, not fully for revenge, mainly for his friends and how he doesnt want c!dream to go around killing and reviving everyone, but the point still stands. (this all makes me extra sad because he had gone to the prison the second time in the first place to get closure :(( )

loss of system of meanings

Systems of meaning refer to your religion or beliefs about the world. This can also refer to getting a strong sense of hopelessness or despair about the world, which as of late mainly c!tommy seems to have. mainly referencing in his stream where he visited dreams bunker, he was asking what the point was of finding things that made him happy if dream was just going to get out the prison and destroy it. theres also a few things that also go with this, in one stream while he burnt down ponks lemon tree for sam nook he said "thats still decaying, but yknow, arent we all." and that one time when he gave that hotel invitation to c!techno he was like “ahahha we could die tomorrow anyway”

its also important to note that, “Any type of long-term trauma, over several months or years, can lead to CPTSD. However, it seems to appear frequently in people who’ve been abused by someone who was supposed to be their caregiver or protector. “ Which is.. fairly accurate in c!tommy’s situation. c!dream might’ve not been a caregiver or protector necessarily but he was still someone that was looking after him yknow?

there are most likely more things than what i layed out that show that c!tommy most likely also has cptsd, however this is just the stuff that i thought up :] add to the post if you’d like to!

(also this isn’t saying that c!tommy doesnt have ptsd, he had both ptsd and c-ptsd. also i am not an expert about ptsd, cptsd, or mental health in general, if i got any information wrong let me know)

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janiedean · 3 years

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How do you feel about the idea of Stannis sacrificing Shireen to stop the Wall from falling? It might be an Azor Ahai-like move for him to pull (if that is what motivates him), and fit into the "what is one child against the kingdom?" debate.

I do realize I am extremely biased on this topic so I might be wrong but I'm dying on the hill that dnd didn't understand what grrm told them when he was talking abt shireen being burned because like... nvm that they def didn't understand the one thing they got right abt the finale, but in order:

'what is one child against the kingdom' debate: extremely right... but the answer is that you shouldn't sacrifice that child for the kingdom which was the character development moment so like he didn't sacrifice edric storm who meant relatively not much to him and he'd sacrifice shireen?

also, I know dnd didn't read that bit, but like... stannis is the dude who in the middle of MY ARMY IS DYING went to tell people 'if I die put my daughter on the throne' when said daughter is basically the brienne of the situation when it comes to how much people would like her ruling, and I'm supposed to buy he sacrifices her?

also: stannis is going to winterfell to take it except the battle of wf is going to take a shitload of a long time to happen because before that goes down a) davos has to show back up with rickon b) news of jon's death must reach them c) bran has to talk to theon d) theon has to not get executed which 99% happens with bran talking through a tree or smth and being like I'M NOT DEAD YET e) possibly sansa shows up with the vale army + jaime/brienne/sandor which means we get all of that first (but like.. jaime's chapter is mid adwd which actually makes sense timeline wise bc we didn't know shit re what happened after so if while the second half of adwd went down jb were offing stoneheart and going to the vale.... it does add up) so like let's say the battle of wf happens like the one of the wall or blackwater ie 2/3rds roughly into wow, when is he going to get back to the wall esp if winter has come and they're stuck in the snowstorms? because I really doubt that

meanwhile shireen is a) at the wall b) in company of her mother who like pretty much doesn't give a single fuck abt her and hated jon anyway c) melisandre who like.... reading her pov she's better than it seemed but honestly she would burn her if it meant r'hollor doing whatever she thinks he's supposed to do so like shireen most likely is getting burned but not because stannis approved of it imvho

now: if I'm wrong and he does that then saving the realm is the only option I accept and like... sorry but I think he'd get himself burned with her at that point not whatever the fucking agamemnon crap they made him pull in the show like if that happens then he dies with her

because like to top this answer off, we're discussing a guy with an extra fucking literal sense of justice that's honestly way over the top to the point that he wouldn't give davos a knighthood if he didn't cut off the finger joints and davos saved his life literally, and we don't presume that if he sacrificed his own daughter that he wants on the throne should he die before he can get it... he wouldn't be up on that pyre with her? because lmao he would think himself that it's not just and he'd punish himself equally and I'm dying on that hill

like again I'm incredibly biased in this sense because we all know how I am with stannis but there is no way he dies a crappy ooc shitty horrid death like in the show - if he dies (which I'm p sure about too bad bc I still think he should actually be king he's the best candidate) he's dying honorably not... like... that and certainly not bc brienne out of everyone kills him and I'm definitely dying on that hill X°D

(also like... how do I put it idt stannis really thinks he's AA and by the time the wall falls it'll be obvious jon is, but like stannis is basically atheist central™ but he's buying into the cult stuff bc a) it makes him feel like these ppl gaf about him b) because IT SUPPOSEDLY WORKS but I mean... 'your grace we need to sacrifice ppl!' 'PRAY HARDER' like honestly idt he's that attached to the idea of being AA so I don't think that would be the motivation at the end of it but still X°D)

#janie writes meta #seethemflying #ask post #stannis baratheon #tagging bc i can idc #ch: stannis baratheon #ch: shireen baratheon

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c-chickens · 3 years

Text

Good morning/afternoon/evening my fellow jjk fans. With the release of chapter 136 of the manga, i can now say with absolute confidence that

We're fucked.

So i say yes we're most definitely fucked, but how about we explore why were fucked and why everyone in jjk is fucked and get super sad about it? Because thats fun. Obviously big big big spoilers for all of the jjk manga ahead.

Neither can any of us, kusakabe

So lets start off with talking about what the hell getwo just did: my mans is essentially awakening hundreds of ppl with newfound cursed abilities and power, one half of which got their hidden abilities activated like junpei and the other that got theirs from a cursed object like Itadori. Now, this by itself would still be an issue, but by itself its not too awful right? Well when you combine that with 1) the damages and deaths of shibuya 2) Itadori's execution bc we KNOW this shit is coming, and 3) the inbalance created by Gojo's sealing,((assuming that getwo successfully escapes with the prison)), it makes things much much more hectic.

And, on top of that, getwo activated this shit immediately, and from the pan-over to tsumiki, it can be assumed that these people are waking up at the exact same time as these events in shibuya are playing out currently, which is even more of a problem bc now the question is: what are the higher ups of the jujutsu world going to prioritize? Killing itadori yuuji bc of sukuna's actions or taking care of the new curse users?

And i say this because they're going to need sorcerers out in the field to find and apprehend these people asap, especially now that Gojo's gone. Sorcerers that they don't really have atm. It was established early on that jujutsu sorcerers are always understaffed, and so with many in the area being either dead, out of commission, and/or disabled, they're going to need as much help as they can get. So i think its possible that they just put more restrictions on itadori for now at least. This also means that the time for rest is likely going to be cut short, and we’ll unfortunately have to see these characters work their asses off and risk their lives some more.

But that aside, thinking about the large scale implications of what happened at shibuya is also going to have to come into play here. Thousands of people are dead. How is the government supposed to explain this? In fact, how do they explain events like these in general? What relationship does the jujutsu world have with the government and how much do they know? Besides itadori, who will have to answer for this damage? And how will regular people take these events? Their families and friends are dead, will they get the truth? You also have to wonder how sorcerers overseas will view these events. Given that Japan seems to be a hotspot for cursed spirits and things of that nature, will they come to help out? The costs to fix these damages come into play as well, and we've seen a crumb of how this will affect the economy from Mei Mei so it will be interesting to see if we get any more answers to that too.

But these are just the more massive events that will be happening at once. We'll also see fushiguro having to find out that his sister is awake in the worst fucking way possible, finding out who's actually alive, seeing characters cope with having disabilities, seeing everyone's reaction to what sukuna/itadori did, reactions to gojo being sealed, and how everyone's going to cope with the deaths of their comrades. So uh. We got a lot of shit here, don't we?

Will anyone actually be able to rest? It really just depends on how akutami wants this to play out. And that goes for all of what I've talked abt here, which is why each chapter continues to get so fucking hype. The stakes keep rising and the events that unfold continue to best my expectations ever single time. I am truly excited to go through the hell that akutami is crafting for us, bc i think this next arc has the potential to be even better than this one.

#jjk spoilers #jjk manga spoilers #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #i seriously thought it couldn't get worse but then it got worse #like i was sitting here like yes the biggest problem will be itadori's execution then this shit drops #reason number 125 of why i hate getwo and want geto back:#also forgot to mention how itadori is gonna cope fuUUUUUCK

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papers4me · 3 years

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Hi, I have always read your furuba reviews and I'm very curious about which are your favorite characters and why?

HI!

Thank you for reading my posts<3. I know I've been slow lately, but I'm not in a right emotional place right now, but I'll be back to posting soon. Actually talking abt furuba & story-telling here in tumblr is such a peaceful outlet that I'm thankful for.

While I love 97% of furuba characters, my faves kept changing while I watched the anime. I decided to have 5 top characters as faves & number one kept changing as the anime progressed.

Since I'm all abt story-telling, I think I need to separate the anime from the manga cuz no way in the anime that tohru would be on my top 5, heck not even top 10! I really don't like how her character was reduced to yuki's mommy-tohru, then angel-tohru, then villain-fixer tohru. The real individual tohru with her own personal story is just two eps long, so meh~. Also, while yuki is in my top 5 in the anime, I don't like how he's too perfect & prince in the anime while his own theme is the imperfect non-prince. Kyo's, too in my top 5 but I dont like how his own story is intentionally messed up by the anime with the stupid "I forgot" that contradicts the anime's own canon plot...

So, I'll tell you my top 5 fave character in the manga so fat with no particular order.

Tohru, while I'm yet to uncover her own plot in the manga, so far she has way more character exploration & depth!! She really feels like a different character from the anime! I'm shocked! The facial expressions, the occasional doubtful self-talk, even the "fake-smile"mask she puts is so expressive. She is treated as a character with a personal plot , regardless of being the protagonist. Her own plot is not reliant on being yuki's mommy, or the sohma's shrink, or a fixer. Her own plot line is abt grief & being lonely. It's the most common struggle that we all share regardless of our gender, race, financial status. Death is the ultimate fact & we'll face loosing a loved one & feeling lonely is not related to social skills nor being loved. I'll forever hate the anime for passing on such unique universal theme in favor of emphasizing the most popular shonen-themed coming of age story ( a boy becoming a man) "yuki" or the over-exaggerated drama in "kyo's". Like I dont want them to pass any of the 3 characters plotlines, but the anime made a choice & forever cemented anime tohru as the most "fixer"character in anime history like 98765678 of other female protagonists.

Yuki has way more character & realness in the manga. He doesnt come off as narrator-y as he does in the anime simply cuz the anime only chose the parts where yuki narrates as a voice-over & told us how to feel & dropped all the parts where he's interacting & actually talking to other characters not just the audience. His own personal story is abt "observing, learning & having the guts to make a move & embracing his own imperfection". I love this! Anime yuki is not imperfect. no. he's the icon of perfect prince, he even initiates a set of fanclub girls into the world that they float! He's so perfect, he "heals" a girl simply by talking to her once. That's all it takes him to fall in love & find his soulmate. While in the manga, I'm starting to see yuki display signs of "kind jerk" in the making, that's refreshing!

I admit that I didn't include kyo into my top 5 until se02. Don't get me wrong, he's so endearing since ep1, but didnt seem to be complex nor refreshing as the others. but se02, ep 9 was the first glimpse into his own character depth & I got hooked! I'm so in love with the theme of "repeated mistakes & guilt". it's such a mature theme & speaks to a much wider audience. The more we repeat the same mistakes, the more we self-sabotage our lives. Also, I love the love isn't a magic healing element in his story. He's the most loved character by tohru, yet her love only hurt him more due to his guilt. Moreover, the romantic element itself wasnt a cliche "love at 1st sight, nor lovers since childhood, nor girl fixes a guy, nor guy protects the girl from danger". Not at all. It was "love blooming subtly, little by little by mundane daily life". I cant express how much I applaud Takaya-san for such complex writing. In the anime, kyo only comes when it's his ep, other than that, he's absent or characterless. I hated that. So far in the manga, kyo has an existence even in other plotlines & has different aspects of his character. Also, I'm shocked at how much inner dialogue he has! like no too much that it involves other character nor too little that you dont understand him. It's just the right amount.

Momiji. He's the most balanced character. He isnt fixed by tohru, but isnt perfectly fine either. He's the definition of the right amount of kindness. He doesn sell himself to make other happy like tohru or kureno, nor puts himself in danger to save others like haru. He does help others but also helps himself. He helped his mom forget him cuz honestly that wasnt even his choice. it's the dad's. He participated willingly tho in avoiding her, but he didnt dwell in self pity & locked himself emotionally. He let go of loving tohru & encouraged kyo, but while he genuinely loved kyo, he didnt just back off cuz he's kind & a sacrificial angel. He stood like a man & challenged kyo for tohru's heart, but let go when he realized the choice is tohru's. not them. They can love her aromatically, but she's the one who decides who to be with. I love the theme of "not competing for love". it's not a competition really. never was. Still, as love sick & heart-broken as he was, momiji didnt dwell in self-pity & after allowing himself to heal, he bounced back & smiled. Momiji is no foolish traveler.

The spot is reserved to a certain character that I want the manga to prove their worth. I dont want them to be as shallow as the anime made them to be. I want to see depth. I dont know if the manga writes them better, but once I finish the manga, I'll know.

I wanted to add shigure but no. Despite all the complexity & the unique roles he has & despite how much I love characters with big giant flaws & ugly characteristics, shigre fell from my top 5 long ago. Look, this seems petty but I can't get over the fact that he slept with akito's mom. ewwwww. It makes me wanna puke! so disgusting. yuck yuck yuck! I dont mind that he "cheated"or wanted to "hurt akito by sleeping with ANOTHER woman". As a matter of fact, such acts create drama, ugly feelings & emotional struggle. I love such things in fiction. but he did it with the mother. He actually laid with both mom & daughter in his life. ewwwwww! This level of eww is so revolting to me! Some ppl are disgusted by bugs & worms that they want to puke, me.. when ppl sleep with both parent/off spring, or both siblings. Yuck! & it's even more yuck that it didnt stop their "love" from being real/ happy/ perfect/ passionate! & that it worked in making akito "want him more & be a "woman" for him"... ew!

lol, so yeah~here's my super long answer to ur super short qs. but I dont be "papers"if I didnt write till my fingers hurt, now would I? XD. I enjoyed ur question so much! thanks<3.

Anon, Don't get offended ny my shigure-rant! XD. its petty, I know. if u read this, tell me who's ur fave?

#fruits basket #anime only #manga reviwes #asks #responding paper #anonymous friends

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appledotcodotuk · 3 years

Text

why the hive fckin suck at its job: a rant

spoilers for tgwdlm ahead!

first of all, it's important to consider what exactly the hive's job is. my answer is... who the fuck knows. literally. what is the hive's aim. what do you want Paul? more like, what do you want hive? let's find out!

it kinda evolves, as the play progresses. the intial aim of the hive, and one that does actually remain consistent is the constant burning need to grow and devour and gain more and more (insert capitalism metaphor here).

however, this is distorted by the people it possess who influence that aim, as we'll see later.

also the fact it crashes into a theatre displaying Mamma Mia gives the hive the motive it need to fit the world around it to the structure of the musical. having no originality of its own, the hive instead just picks up what is given to it. kinda like an evil baby.

it wants uniformity, that is indeed its ultimate goal and desire, no duh. it thinks it can achieve that through musical theatre, shame that the hive is dead wrong. cause the hive fucking sucks at its own job / aim / ultimate purpose / one concrete goal that motivates all its actions.

can't maintain control over its subjects

okay, so, the hive wants uniformity. it wants everyone to be dancing to the beat of its own tune. right? yeah. shame it literally can't keep its own possessed subjects in line at all. at the risk of sounding like the 10th doctor waxing lyrical abt humanity for the 50th time, humans are really difficult to control cause we're not really motivated by an altruistic allegiance to one primary good. we've got icky emotions that often move us to do stupid unpredictable stuff way more. it makes me wonder if the reason the hive wanted to use musical theatre to try and persuade ppl was cause it seems to think that is how theyll get emotive humans; through emotive songs. anyways. let's look at some examples shall weeeee?

Mr Davidson:

so, Mr Davidson. funnily enough, he's the guy whose in part acting as the hive trying to figure out what it wants through his interactions w/ Paul. every person it possess gives it just a bit more humanity and curiosity abt the world it is currently taking over. at least I think so. hence why as the musical develops u get character's like possessed!Alice wondering 'why does it hurt to love?' - the change in music and mood to something much more introspective really suggests to me that the hive is beginning to question the thoughts and emotions of its human hosts.

Mr Davidson is a family man through and through, he loves his wife Carol. she's his muse, his source of light. his feelings for her are not concrete or easy to explain and solve - hence why his sudden ahem demand of her is so hilarious and also jarring. it completely clashes with the 'I want song' which is simple, and often pushes forward a wider cause. not so with Mr Davidson, he just really loves his wife man. enough to break a frickin alien possession.

tbh I think its hilarious that (at least to me) the hive has to force him to forget and continue with the song, like, he straight up is just talking to his wife in that phone call, talking, not singing. so, no possession until he reverts back into song. ergo, the hive cannot maintain the uniformity it wants. even from the get go when theoretically its control should be stronger cause it has less ppl to co-ordinate. bad. at. its. job.

Paul:

this one hurts folks. yes, I know it's generally agreed, though somewhat debated that the state of Paul by the end of the tgwdlm is not purely possessed. I agree. once again, the hive is unable to truly enforce uniformity.

at this point, the motives of Paul and the hive are kinda just mixed, neither fully human nor fully alien. hence the constant shifts between pleeing for her to get away, to hide, to stay safe: 'what if the only choice is you have to sing to survive' and just full on old style hive nastiness 'let me puke in your mouth and just open your food bin girl' (so romantic 🥰 /j).

the hive has gone away from its original aim, and become something... different. no longer stuck to just one type of genre or style of song, it's really clever to show the developing complexity of the hive by showing how it is now juggling lots of different motifs with references to all the old songs from before recontextualised in a new way - its learning. evil baby... no longer uniform.

general miscommunication:

there are several instances of the hive not fully having uniform control over its subjects. for instance, right after not your seed with the three teens having to like... calibrate. they aren't just completely connected then?? also, this is a very small thing, but uhhhh at the end of inevitable when Paul is about to say the apotheosis is upon... the chorus interrupts him with USSSSSSS. interruptions??? not very in sync of u hive.

I think this inability to exert uniformity is also shown in the contrast between genre of musical theatre. my alien abomination cannot decide whether it wants to be the more modern edgy rock musical (join us (and die), not your seed ) or super happy go lucky old style musical theatre (lah dee dah dah day, and inevitable). it tries to do both, even while trying to encourage union, and sticking to one thing. hypocrite!!!!!

2. aims are guided by the people it possess

so, I mentioned this a bit already, but the hive isn't only mutating the humans, the humans are mutating the hive right back. this is more an interesting observation than any actual analysis but let's goooo.

greenpeace girl:

I think it's very likely that greenpeace girl is one of the first to be possessed. This is probably easily debunkable but whatever this analysis is flying by the seat or its pants anywayyyyy. why? cause where else would it pick up that whole 'this planet needs fixing' thing? it's interesting too, cause it morphs from expressing the desire to join hands and sing together, unity and peace with no actual action behind it. this then goes right to the other end, with the hive going 'fine I'll do it myself' and trying to save things by enforcing a dictatorship on the world. it develops and changes, and strays from its original means of accomplishing its aims! speaking oooooof...

3. inconsistent in means of accomplishing aims

okay, ur an evil hive mind. u think musicals are the way to win over these silly humans cause they're all weak and emotive and seem to respond to them. but, wait! schwoopsie! you haven't realised that for emotional depth and growth to mean anything, you need there to be established development and well... growth. otherwise the sentiments are as vague as the ones expressed in What Do You Want, Paul?

this show has genuine emotional moments, just not really during the musical numbers WITH EXCEPTIONS. any strife is smoothed over quickly, and so the development and change that would have to go into such growth is just gone. (see, You Tied Up My Heart) all so it can achieve its own desire to grow and grow and grow, maybe a metaphor for art being killed under late stage capitalism??

what actually matters is the impact the songs have afterwards, in causing a death - because we have a bond and care abt these characters. those short scenes between Paul and Emma are actually way more resonant than any song. except... inevitable, and also not your seed a bit. at this point the hive has learnt a thing or two, and can actually twist human emotion a little. but for it to do that, it has to reject the uniformity it prizes, and be adaptable. point towards being more human than it first thought? methinks so. and yet it's just not enough...

it's also why let it out, to me, feels really ingenuine. Paul has expressed himself in much better ways already. what they're doing is clearly paining him, and hurting the guy. he's terrified bless.

you can't force someone into being emotional vulnerable, man.

it's why all the deaths for the characters who are forced to express themselves are really violent, involving them being ripped open - literally forcing them to expose themselves from the 'inside out' as Alice reflects in Not Your Seed. you can't force genuine emotional connection, it has to be fostered, shown in the much more affecting relationship of Paul and Emma. the only reason the hive actually has power over our characters is because of these genuine emotional connections, which it tries and often fails to take advantage of, resulting in just resorting to brute violence. messy hive, very messy.

at the core, the musical's a kinda attack on that toxic positivity mindst: trying to force people to reach the sort of easy solutions by sharing feelings in a way that feels pretty invasive and deciding you are instantly fixed. the problems these characters face are jarringly not really what you'd expect a character in a musical to face, cheating, a lot of it, mid-life crisis. problems that are bland, or wayyyy too real. this is purposefully done, to reveal just how silly the hive's aim to use musical theatre to solve everyone's problem is. life is more complex than that smh.

4. a human can write a much more expressive, and genuine song than they ever could lol

u know which song I'm talking abt. what more is there to say. so much for making persuasive songs to tempt people over.

5. make me sad cause they took some perfectly nice ppl and funked them up 😭

this was a stupid point lol. basically I'm just bitter that this hive took a bunch of perfectly okay ppl and gave them hive brain. screw u hive. I swear I'm gonna watch Black Friday soon, cause I'm sure it's gonna completely destroy every thought I've had so far, but whateve,,, just take this as a look at tgwdlm like it's a stand-alone piece.

these guys are supposed to all be 'individuals' on one level, but also 'appendages of a much larger organism'. there's a little too much individualism and fracturing to be cohesive enough to do that I feel. the hive to me is not an infallible, unstoppable force, in fact, every human it takes over only brings it closer to understanding us. so that's maybe a slight positive note??? idk ?! I just have lots of thoughts and feelings abt this musical even if this doesn't make sense I'm proud i wrote it down hehe.

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dottie-wan-kenobi · 4 years

Photo

DOTTIE’S BATFAM FIC RECS

hi!! so, no one asked for this but,,, I wanted to make one anyway! I really love the batfam a lot and I see a lot of ppl in the fandom wishing it was easier to find good fics. this is by no means all of them but they are some of my faves, generally not too fanon-y! all fics are gen/family fluff with little to no ships (which are not bat/cest).

feel free to message/ask me about triggers if you’re unsure!! and lmk if I forgot to tag anyone ❤️

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Homecoming by Ionaperidot / @iowriteswords on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10966704/chapters/24414906

Summary: “Your son’s grave. It’s been disturbed.” In which people actually notice when Jason breaks out of his grave, and Bruce finds him before Talia does.

My thoughts: Bruce’s voice in this is seriously perfect, plus Dick, Jason, and Tim are great as well!! This fic honestly helps inform me of my Tim characterization!

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The Wound Begins To Bleed by audreycritter / @audreycritter on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13295661

Summary: Now that Tim’s moved back to the manor, he just wants a few afternoons a week without Damian around. Funny how getting that was the catalyst for him becoming a better big brother.

My Thoughts: it makes me emotional okay it GETS me right in my HEART!!! both Dami and Tim are so so so good I can’t rec this enough

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just hold a smile by RecklessWriter

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22777705

Summary: That's the thing about smiles, Dick thinks. If you flash the right one, no one knows there's something more going on inside. Five times Dick faked a smile and one time someone saw through it.

My Thoughts: Dick & others, including Tim and Cass. Dick is really good at hiding his feelings from others, and I love how in this fic, a lot of times, he’s hiding them to “protect” whoever it is

(more under the cut!)

life, if well lived by CaptainOzone

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18378512

Summary: Jason wakes up from a time-travel mishap to find Thomas and Martha Wayne hovering over him. Just another day in the life, right? ...Not quite.

My Thoughts: this one had me crying like a baby!!! the characterization is great and I love CO’s Thomas and Martha

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one shot, two shots in the night by discowing / @dykewing on tumblr, @/wlwdiscowing on twitter

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18871864/chapters/44792710

Summary: The New York Times ✓ @nytimes · 4h

“A Shot in the Dark” remains on our bestseller list for the fourth week in a row! Read our review of @brucewayne’s tell-all memoir here: nyti.ms/3Fs9k2E

My Thoughts: TALK ABT MAKING ME CRY. this gets me every time, and it’s absolutely worth ALL of the rereads. such a great Bruce.

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The View From Jade by lowflyingfruit

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11329791/chapters/25359972

Summary: Being transported to the past is not the sort of thing one normally expects. But this having happened, and with no easy way back, Jason's determined to make the most of it. Though the Bat still stalks Gotham's streets, the city's crime is run by the mobs instead of the rogues. There's no Joker yet. There's no Robin. Maybe there shouldn't be.

My Thoughts: Jason & Dick, and also Bruce somewhere in there too. this is SO! GOOD! I absolutely love Jason’s voice, and Dick is so in character. plus Bruce and Alfred are awesome as well!!!

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The Birds Who Smile by Raberba girl / @raberbagirl on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12972324/chapters/29656290

Summary: "Dark Nights: Metal" AU where Bruce adopts three of the Robins who once belonged to the Batman Who Laughs.

My Thoughts: I think this was the first fic that introduced me to Duke, actually! and while there are a LOT of characters involved, they’re all pretty great and realistic. they have their moments to shine and it’s,,, *chef’s kiss*

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The Thing about Apples and Trees by Cdelphiki / @cdelphiki on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22192747

Summary: When Jason agreed to let Bruce adopt him, he thought that meant Jason felt happy and safe in Bruce's home. But when Jason's nightmares only increased, and his panic attacks and meltdowns started happening more often, Bruce was at a complete loss for what to do. But then, Jason finally opened up to him, and he was able to quell some of Jason's worse fears. Perhaps a midnight chat and a few hugs wouldn't fix everything, but it was a step in the right direction.

My Thoughts: this is part of a series but might be okay to read on it’s own? tho really I suggest the entire series, it’s amazing. but this fic specifically has great kid Jason characterization (and also made me cry, I think!)

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Kitten by lurkinglurkerwholurks / @lurkinglurkerwholurks on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18194294

Summary: Bruce opened his mouth, prepared to give the unemotional, no-nonsense explanation he had cobbled together between his walk to the car and now. Instead, his mouth went dry and nothing came out.

“Bruce?”

Bruce was saved from answering by the thin cry that cut through the silence. He winced, then reached back with one hand to shush the dimpled, kicking legs.

“Bruce, tell me I did not just hear what I thought I heard.”

My Thoughts: so so so cute! plus the gangs all here!!!

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Yes Ma’am by lurkinglurkerwholurks

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22004695

Summary: Jason had shuffled into the bedroom and had just finished pulling his shirt over his head when he paused, arms still trapped in the fabric. A pair of eyes glowed at him from the bed, reflecting the dim light from the hall.

My Thoughts: I also have to include this one bc it was a gift to me, and it’s so cute & angsty & just dkjsfsdjkhfksjah I love it so much

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The D-Word by AutumnHobbit / @autumnhobbit on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9597686

Summary: "See, Tim?" Jason called over his shoulder sardonically. "Dad agrees with me."

He turned back to his food for a moment before the thought suddenly occurred to him that the Cave had gone near silent. He cautiously glanced back at the others. Alfred was still working away at stitching Tim up. Tim looked a little pale and sweaty, but he was glancing over at Jason with a look that was a mixture of concern and confusion. Bruce was standing stock-still, seemingly staring off into space.

My Thoughts: I constantly reread this when I want funny and then heart breaking Jason & Bruce feels. I always know what’s coming and it STILL GETS ME

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baby wonder by drakefeathers / @drakefeathers on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/1887807

Summary: (baby!damian AU) Bruce dies, Dick becomes Batman. But the Damian that Talia leaves in his care isn’t a ten-year-old warrior, he’s a ten-month-old baby.

My Thoughts: oh my goddd this is so good, it hurts but it’s SO CUTE at the same time??? ugh dskjfhkjsadhf

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a hat fashioned from tin foil by discowing

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14356020

Summary: nightwang @karakurachou – 8 hours ago

jason todd is alive and faked his death so he could become robin: a conspiracy theory thread

Batfam conspiracy theories meet social media.

My Thoughts: !!!!!!! so good!!!! seriously one of the best social media fics I’ve ever read.

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Bet Your Bottom Dollar by jerseydevious / @jerseydevious on tumblr and twitter

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17971160/chapters/42447017

Summary: Dick's been having kind of a hard time, recently. When it boils over, Bruce is there for him.

My Thoughts: I reread this one a LOT when I need Dick & Bruce feels

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Metanoia by AlannaOfRoses / @alannaofroses on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21943249

Summary: Jason's bleeding out, Dick's overtired, and a half-serious offer turns into their new normal. Sometimes you just need somebody else around.

My Thoughts: this one was also a gift to me!! it’s got amazing brotherly bonding and it made me laugh a LOT

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a hundred miles through the desert by acrobats

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18197330/chapters/43045388

Summary: Finding himself nearly three decades into the past hadn't been part of Jason's plans for the day, but he could manage. Having no idea how he got there, no clear path home and a recently orphaned Bruce Wayne determined to drag Jason into his search for his parents' killer - that might be a little more complicated.

My Thoughts: ughhh this is such good Jason content (and such amazing Jason voice, too) I adore it

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oh, where do I begin? by LazuliQuetzal / @lazuliquetzal on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21988693

Summary: “No, no, nothing’s wrong,” Jason says. “We’re a-okay. Just peachy. Good times.”

“Oh,” Duke says, lamely, working himself out of crisis mode. There’s an awkward silence for a moment before he speaks up again. “Why did you call?”

“Right, right," Jason mumbles, which seemed a little out of character to Duke. His sort-of wayward brother was generally intimidating, even when he wasn't trying to be. "Uh, Dick said that you had a guinea pig when you were younger. How do you take care of a guinea pig?”

_____

AKA, not-exactly accidental guinea pig acquisition

My Thoughts: this was ALSO a gift to me but it’s so funny and sweet and there’s amazing Duke & Jason bonding so I absolutely must rec it

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Latchkey by goldkirk / @goldkirk on tumblr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21672928/chapters/51685639

Summary: or, How Tim Drake Found A Family, Became A Photojournalist, Learned To Love Coffee, and Grew Up, not necessarily in that order.

Tim Drake is thirteen, runs the famous BatWatch blog that has spiraled hilariously out of control, has absentee parents that suit his purposes just fine, is training himself to run the streets at night, and is doing absolutely peachy, thank you.

Alfred and Jason disagree, and get Dick and Bruce involved in figuring out their weird nextdoor neighbor kid’s life. Everything goes uphill from there.

My Thoughts: this is SO GOOOOD the Tim feels are amazing!!! the family interactions!!! everything! sdkjfhsjdfhksdhfajh

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Blood in the Water by MishaBerry

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12734052/chapters/29037474

Summary: We all do stupid things when we are lonely, and in faraway lands, we hardly expect the consequences to follow us. Bruce certainly never thought twice about an American woman in Jaipur after one night with her. He hardly expected to see her ever again.

The universe, on the other hand, had different ideas, and the tides of time and chance brought Tim Drake to Bruce's life over and over again.

My Thoughts: this one is more AU than a lot of the others on here but it’s a lot of fun!! it has Tim & Damian & Jason feels, plus the rest of the family on a smaller scale

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so these are just SOME, and honestly you should go and check out other works done by all of these authors!! also would like to suggest reading the fics of @renecdote , @caramelmachete , @redtruthed , @rredarrow , and @schweeeppess !!!

#batfam fic recs #batfam #batfamily #dc #fic rec #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #cass cain #duke thomas #steph brown #damian wayne #i do love all of these fics but im thinking there should be more w cass and duke #both in general and on the list #i'll just have to make another one w more of their fics dkjfkdjsafh

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normal-thoughts-official · 3 years

Note

you talk a lot about magnus and camille dynamic and how they started and all that great meta content that you know i love but here's a question that idk if you ever got: how long do you think they were together? bc i can't think of a specific timeline and personally i love the one you talked abt at some point how she was pretty much right after asmododo or something like that, so he went from one type of abuse into another... but how long was he there? was camille with him for 20 years? 80? 130? any theories?

ugh that's a complicated one because i don't really have an answer for that and i think about it often as well

altho i think you got confused about her being right after asmodeus, i definitely don't think she was. i mentioned it my post about the timeline to say that magnus COULDN'T have been born close to the 1800s because that would make it asmodeus and camille way too close and that can't be the case because it would imply camille is basically the only person he dated before alec doajsdoaj and we know that's not true cuz there's also other ppl like george and etc. it was more a point in favor of "early to mid 1600s" for his birth date

anyway! let's go through this. i mentioned in another post that i think he got together with camille right after george, and that i think george died around the middle of the US civil war, which lasted from 1861 to 1865. so let's say they got together around 1863. now, we have a few pieces of information:

magnus mentioned that he hadn't been with anyone for "almost a century" when talking to alec. i know i think magnus is time blind but he can't be TOO off here. that was in 2016 so that would make their breakup date be a little after 1916 if magnus remembers correctly

literally the only thing about the timeline in that time period that i can remember is that one picture there was in his file of magnus surrounded by girls at a party, which looked to be in the 20s to me. since camille was an abusive asshole probably sabotaging his every chance to meet people, that couldn't have been when they were together. so i'd say 1920 is like, the limit for when they could have broken up. it's up to you whether or not you think magnus would be jumping into his party animal role immediately after the breakup or if it would take some time for him to heal; personally i think both make sense (i think she made a huge number on him so it would make sense for him to take a while to get back to that kind of thing; on the other hand, a lot of people turn straight to being party animals after breaking up abusive relationships, especially because for so long abusers have kept them from doing anything fun. so both work imo) so it's up to you

conclusion: they broke up in 1920 at the latest, so the max you could go for is 80 years, if you go with a timeline where camille was right after george (george can't be after camille because magnus has had no relationships after camille, but there could have been a bigger gap between george and camille than i personally hc). it could still be less tho, because we literally have NO information whatsoever on what happened between 1861 and 1920. even if you go with "they broke up and magnus immediately went full party animal" (which is perfectly valid), it's also entirely possible that this happened in say, 1901 and that pic just happened to be from the 20s, years later. but i also don't think it could have been a lot earlier than 1901 because magnus said almost a century, implying less than a century between the year they broke up and 2016. and while i do think that any immortal would lose track of time after a while and mingle years and decades together, nevermind adhd time blind icon magnus bane, if they had broken up in, say, 1880, magnus would remember that over a century has passed, if anything because so much has changed since then. so i think for him to say that the breakup should have happened in the 20th century at least

so that's the analysis from what we've seen in the show. personal opinion! i think 80 years makes sense, but is a bit much. it makes sense because there does seem to be a pretty obvious gap in magnus' file from the 1860s to the 1920s and then it goes back to having many pictures of him, and that "disappearance" makes sense in the context of him being in an abusive relationship (which limits your interactions and going outs by a lot). it does seem to be a bit much because magnus is at max 400, so, if they had been together 80 years, that would have been 20% of magnus' life spent with camille. or 1/5. added with all the time with asmodeus, it seems to be... a bit much dioadsoaijd and like look i'm not judging, i know abusive relationships can last many years and decades even for mortals, nevermind immortals, but i just don't like the idea of it lasting this long personally, especially because i think it makes him getting with alec seem actually a bit soon considering how long the abusive relationship lasted, and that's ignoring asmodeus' abuse on top of it

so personally, i like it morenif its around 40-50 years. i think it makes sense. it would mean the breakup was sometime around the 1910s, and while, okay, there is a gap in his file that seems to only end in the 20s, we must not forget an important fact: shadowhunters are stupid. so i actually think it makes sense that like, magnus emerges from his abusive relationship and is still getting back on his feet, and shadowhunters just don't care. like who is that guy? oh some warlock, no one's heard of him since like the 1860s lol. whatever happened to him? who cares. anyway, we love racism

and then around a decade later it turns out that magnus is healing enough to be a pain in their ass; say, that is when he becomes HWoB, or simply that they are reminded of how powerful magnus actually is once he is back in activity, and so they go back to like, investigating him and updating his file. so the file gap could be explained in that case. it also actually makes more sense that it would take shadowhunters a while to pay attention to him again, and since magnus was healing from an abusive relationship, the time it would take for him to draw their attention might well be around a decade

and with 40-50 years of an abusive relationship that would mean magnus has spent 10-12% of his life with camille; which is a LOT of time (for comparison: my first abusive relationship lasted a little over a year and i was 16 at the time; that makes it have lasted around 6% of my life at the time, and it did a HUGE number on me, taking me almost 3 years to have a relationship again), but not quite as much as a full 20%. not just that, but him taking "almost a century" (it would actually make it be a little over a century in this timeline, but again, magnus is immortal and time blind, so give him a break) to get with anyone again makes sense. that would be around double the time he's spent with her before he heals enough to be with someone else. that tracks, because abuse fucks you up fast and unfuckening yourself up takes longer. magnus isn't even fully unfucked up (which is okay, he doesn't have to be), but for him to be ready to take such huge steps as he is taking with alec, i think around double the time he's spent with her spent on healing makes sense

(again, i'm mostly going off my own experiences here; my abusive relationship lasted almost a year and a half, my next relationship was almost three years after the breakup. so almost perfectly double the time before i was ready to have another relationship. and again, i know recovery isn't the same for everyone and a lot of factors go into this, but i just think a timeline where he's been with her for 80 years and then gets with alec less than 100 afterwards is a bit too fast)

i still think 40 years is kind of a very long time to be in an abusive relationship and like holy shit i cant even imagine, but also i mean, mortals have abusive relationships that last that long and to an immortal itd feel like less time, and it does seem to be what best fits the timeline, so

and yeah i think those are my thoughts dadsajdsa

LAST MINUTE EDIT BEFORE THIS IS PUBLISHED CUZ IM NOT REDOING THE WHOLE THING: i got an anon today saying that magnus said something about not having seen camille in 130 years (link) which i didnt/dont really remember but i trust that theyre right and im wrong because i dont remember a lot of shit from this show. 130 years before 2016 would be 1886, meaning that if they broke up at that time and got together right after george's death as i personally hc, that's a 20-year relationship. that sounds like it fits the timeline as much as any other to me, and like i said in that ask, i think it makes sense that magnus would play it down to alec by saying "almost a century" instead of how long it's really been cuz it's a bit too vulnerable, and plus, we know one of the ways he protects himself is by not letting people pinpoint exactly some important dates from his past, particularly his birthday and etc

and okay i know that 20 years together, then 130 years recovering is a huge difference, but also i think with twenty years together as opposed to my comparatively short abusive relationship the scars of abuse would deepen a lot and quicker, so maybe it makes sense that it would take a longer time to feel confident enough to get to dating again. plus, like i said, there's no real math to be had in that process, everyone is different, has their own history and recovery process and etc so it's not like there is a deadline. so actually scratch everything i said above im going with this timeline. the one thing that doesn't track with that is the gap in his file but also like i said shadowhunters are stupid, so. yeah 20 years together is probably closer to it

in the end its kind of a relief cuz i was like "holy shit 40 years is so LONG" so... yeah udndidn

#me: i don't really now. also me: gigantic essay with lots of numbers and a relatively narrow time gap as a result #sh #shadowhunters #magnus bane #camille belcourt is an abuser #camille's trash party #magnus bane meta #anti shadowhunters #abuse tw #death tw #mentions of war #meta #ask #some-thrilling-heroics #there is too much math in this post tbh #q #adhd magnus bane #time blind magnus

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jade-doodles-questionmark · 4 years

Text

On Alexander, Angelica and Eliza

Heres some long-ass personal interpretation based on the musical that nobody following this blog signed up for lol. Not gonna be touching on history coz i’m no expert and there’re ppl way more qualified for that. and it’s good to keep things separated.

there’re obviously many similarities between the two A’s. Both are witty, outspoken, center of attention, and a bit of a flirt. To me, the most interesting trait shared by both is their awareness: They know exactly where they stand socially, and subsequently, how to play by the rules to climb up. This clear awareness is where I got the idea for the staircase drawings. “i’m a girl in a world in which my only job is to marry rich/ my father has no sons so i’m the one who has to social climb for one” is a demonstration of Angelica’s awareness, just as “As a kid in the Caribbean I wished for a war/ I knew that I was poor/ I knew it was the only way to rise up” shows Alexander’s.

it’s different for Eliza - i know as the show proceeds, she gradually becomes more ambitious and active, but in Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story, what she asks, instead of how to rise up, is: “Have I done enough?” this quiet insistence is why i always see her as someone who does things because she thinks it’s a right thing to do, no matter whether that thing in question would benefit her personally or not. sure, she gives off "cinnamon roll" vibes, but girl’s no less strong or badass than Alexander or Angelica.

More under cut coz I’m incapable of being concise:

Angelica:

what always strikes me as interesting about Angelica is the contrast of what she says vs. what she does.

In The Schuyler Sisters, the majority of her lines are about empowering women, which, I think, is where the depiction of Angelica as an angry feminist comes from in some fanfics. But in Satisfied, we see she plays squarely by the rules of patriarchy and social classes (the three fundamental truths part).

Similarly, in TSS, she says "so men say I'm intense or I'm insane", seemingly unbothered, if not lowkey proud, by these comments, but in Satisfied, she talks about the resulting gossip if she were to marry Alexander.

I saw a post which expressed that Angelica thinks like Alexander but acts like Burr, and I agree. She has a sharp mind and is unafraid to speak out, like Alexander, but she’s also got things to lose, like Burr. Having family responsibilities means that she does not, and cannot, act without restrictions and hesitations like Hamilton. She doesn't necessarily wait it out like Burr, but she does think things thru, because the important decisions she makes carry enough weight to not only affect the future of herself but also of her family.

I had mentioned in an old post that Satisfied is basically Angelica assessing cost & gain for each of the options she has, for all the parties involved. even though that song's ending has mixed feelings and it's DEFINITELY a heartbreaking song, Angelica's choice did maximize the gain for everyone at the time: She was able to maintain her bond with Alexander and married rich to ensure her material comfort. Alexander was able to marry a Schuyler and elevate his status. Eliza got the boy she loved and was happily married. She even foresaw some possible challenges the newly wed Hamiltons were likely to face (“He’ll never be satisfied”).

She knows she lives in a world of patriarchy; she isn't happy with it, but she knows how to take advantage of the system as much as she can. She knows how to be the center of attention, be charming, and appeal to ppl. She knows what kind of husband is beneficial to have. She knows how to influence politics in her own way (take a break). Part of why I found Satisfied so sad is that her mind and her heart wish for two different things. Angelica is a realist, over everything else. She can be a feminist, but definitely not an angry one.

Alexander:

I talked a bit abt him in an older post on Maria - and a lot of what I said abt Maria applies to him. If the challenge Angelica was facing is invisible societal restrictions on women, what Alexander faces is purely regarding survival. Having needed to fight and compete for resources, I imagine he's at least somewhat influenced by the philosophy of social darwinism. I also said, in the same post, that I don't think he'd be really inclined to help ppl in the same difficulty he used to be in, for the same reason. If he could make it this far with his own hard work, how would it be fair to make things easier for others now? Would those ppl even deserve their success now the bar has been lowered? It's not exactly a right way of thinking, but it's also hard to blame him. after having to compete for resource w others in order to climb up, it’s hard to change the mentality.

I've seen a music analysis (by Howard Ho on YouTube) on Hurricane, and it concludes that when Hamilton was singing that song, he wasn't exactly recalling the past - he's been mentally living in that reality and never truly left. (There's similar remarks that Hamilton's past in the Caribbean had always plagued him despite his power and position in Chernow's biography, but we're only analyzing the musical here.) He never fully turned off his survival mode.

To clarify: by survival mode, I don't literally mean he fights to survive. He didn't exactly show a strong will to survive and was quite willing to give up his life for noble causes, up until he met Eliza. What I meant is, he remembers being destitute and helpless, he remembers seeing deaths of trivial importance, so he fights to be as far away from destitution and helplessness as possible, he fights to have the opportunity to die a glorious and noble death. Because to be able to die for something matters is still a privilege. No matter how high up he rose to position, his insecurity that he may end up losing those never faded away. This raw energy, I guess, is what gradually turned the others in the musical to be more like him.

Eliza:

Eliza seems to be the one who's the most content abt their situations out of the three. After all, one of her motifs in the musical is "look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now", and the other one is “that would be enough”.

ppl usually say Helpless and Satisfied should be listened back to back (and nothing wrong with that), but comparing these two songs, Helpless doesn’t explore as much of Eliza’s character as Satisfied does Angelica. Throughout Helpless, she’s spent most of the song narrating what happened and falling head over heels for Alexander. As for her first appearance in TSS, she doesn’t have as much of a voice and show of character in comparison to Angelica, Burr, other Peggy either.

The first moment we truly see her thoughts is in That Would Be Enough. It’s also in this song, her two other motifs (”that would be enough” and “narrative”) are introduced. Unlike Alexander and Angelica at that point of story, she’s happy with her life, wants it to remain that way, and doesn’t ask for more.

i dont mean she’s not ambitious like the other two - she’s driven, but by other things. she doesn’t think of legacy, material comfort, status, position, etc. as important as Angelica and Alexander, as we can see in Burn. it’s not that she doesn’t know the rules - girl’s not playing the game at all.

unlike the two A’s, Eliza’s growth happens in the second act. Angelica’s barely in the second act, and in the same act we see Alexander’s most trusted weapon, writing, contributing to his downfall. but for Eliza, she turns from the observer in Helpless, the supporter in That Would Be Enough, to the only one on stage in Burn, and to being the center of stage in Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story. in the second act we see her going thru the series of most crushing heartaches: Reynolds Pamphlet, death of Phillip, and death of Alexander, but we also see her strength. she’s a good person, but ppl usually forget that being nice takes energy and strength too. it takes strength to support, to forgive, to mourn the passing of your loved ones, and to preserve their memories and legacy. she shines and grows after overcoming the loss and heartbreaks. Angelica says in Satisfied “she’d say 'i’m fine' but she’d be lying”, i don’t think she’s giving Eliza enough credit for her mental strength there lol.

side note: this is where i got idea for the eliza art from a few days ago - kintsugi represents the idea that your wound becomes your history and forms part of who you are, rather than something ugly to be ashamed of. I think it fits well with Eliza’s development.

Congrats! you’ve made it till the end! don’t know why u’d do that, but thanks!

if u’re reading this feel free to send me a simple art request to compensate the time u took reading my bullshit

#hamilton #alexander hamilton #hamliza #eliza schuyler #eliza hamilton #Angelica Schuyler #hamgelica #the schuyler sisters #character analysis #long post #*cough* Excuse me my lit major is showing #jades weird ideas

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todomitoukei · 3 years

Note

Since it was Dabi’s Bday recently I’d like to share some thoughts/ideas/headcanons about him. I hope you don’t mind, I rlly love your blog.

The flowers Rei thought she received from Enji were actually from Touya, because despite everything, this boy still loves his mom. He cannot resent her for what happened because he knows they were more or less in the same boat and she did try to protect him, which is also why I like to think that at the end of Dabi’s reveal video, when he’s done talking, he stands up to turn off the camera and just before the video cuts out you can hear a whispered “I’m sorry, mom” and the screen goes black. The volume needs to be on max to hear it, which is why most ppl missed it.

I saw this theory that Dabi actually does have 2 quirks, which is how he survived the accident and got his scars. (I didn’t quite get the logistics and I don’t believe it but it’s an interesting concept imo.) The theory is that he got his scars because his body cracked, the way a frozen mug would crack if u filled it with hot liquid. (Skin seems too stretchy to just crack like that tho so idk.) This would explain why his scars are so clean-cut and still need to be stapled. Also, his scars look more like frostbites rather than burn marks but idk. He totally has some form of chronic pain from his scars, or at least from the staples pulling on his skin.

He acts cold towards the LOV members, although he enjoys their company after a long time of being on his own, because he’s scared of getting close to ppl and starting to care cuz he knows how it feels to lose everything he cares about. He doesn’t want to feel what he felt when he had to leave his family ever again.

I rlly think Touya and Keigo knew each other as kids; not necessarily as friends but they’ve talked enough to exchange names at least once. I imagine this happening a bit before Enji caught Hawks’ dad, Keigo finding a patched-up kid near a park, asking him what happened, exchanging names and talking a bit, maybe playing in the park for the afternoon, and not seeing each other again. Just enough interaction for Hawks to later wonder “what happened to that battered kid?”. Dabi recognized him when they met years later during the manga time, he didn’t trust Hawks because his general rule is to not trust anybody, but deep down he hoped. (sry this is my DBHWK addiction talking, ignore this)

After the accident, he had to live on the streets and fend for himself for years, so he’s seen a lot of shit after that, which earned him 1) more trauma, 2) critical and cynical thinking, 3) limited amount of empathy and trust issues, 4) the admirable ability to call out BS like the drama queen he is.

And one thing that bothers me logistically is that we know Touya’s body was not made for a fire quirk as strong as his, but, that could’ve easily been solved with support gear? Like a protective costume to cool his body and limit the fire output to only his hands?? Why tf didn’t Enji bother to provide his oldest kid (who showed much promise to become a hero, mind u) with the proper resources he obv needed? I’m kinda salty abt this ngl.

Anyway, I’m done here. I hope you don’t mind me venting out these ideas. I rlly like ur blog and I felt like you and the lil community u’ve gathered here could appreciate most of these. <3

Thank you so much<3 I’m really happy about all these messages and all the interaction from you guys, it’s much appreciated!

I really love those theories, too! The theory of the flowers actually being from Dabi is one of my favorites. Also the “I’m sorry, mom” hello??? Yeah, I didn’t need a heart anyway, thank you....... :(

The frozen mug, though... a funnier mental image than it should be.

Totally agree with the LOV thing. I really think that part of him is just too fixated on his goals to destroy Endeavor that he can’t really care/think about anyone else, but I also do think that a part of him actively tries to avoid people and the risk of starting to care about them. If you think about how he most likely is aware that an attempt at killing Shouto or Endeavor would also probably result in his own death, he might not want to get attached to anyone because what if he gets second thoughts then? Or what if he dies and they then get sad about it? And he just knows that his faked death hurt his family (that whole “thought so hard about it I went crazy”), so him dying would now also hurt the LOV, therefore he tries not to get close so their pain won’t be as bad as it could be?

Endeavor definitely could’ve helped him, but we’re talking about the guy who gave up on trying to reach his goals after like two years LMAO. Just cannot take this man seriously. They definitely could’ve figured out a way. I mean, Dabi did more or less figure out a way on his own. He uses larger attacks right away and then gets into people’s heads as his secret weapon and as a way to take a little break from overheating. Imagine how proper support items could help him.

Heroes (and U.A.) focus far too much on their quirks and too little on all the other important skills needed for the job - just look at Uraraka who learned some basic self-defense at her internship, which then saved her life against Toga in the summer camp arc. Meanwhile, U.A. only lets them have some weird P.E. class where all they do is just use their quirks instead of being taught more basic fighting/survival skills? Heroes are just weird, and their education is a joke.

#thanks for sharing those theories♥#dabi #ask #Anonymous

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smallestclowninthecircus · 3 years

Text

Season 3 notes popping off

due to my desire to not completely fail all my classes this year i made myself slow down significantly while listening to this season, and the fact that the other person i'm listening along with had to catch up. We've managed to convert several other people to start listening and its pretty great.

ep 81: what does it even mean to be chosen by one of them? And if he was chosen by the eye. we know Gertrude wasnt? Because she cut the eyes out of the magazines?

ep 82: elias lmao. I understand why people like him so much bahshdhdk i thought he was gonna snitch on Jon but he didnt so he's fine. Ok but how do we think he knew all that stuff. Idk probably just institute connections. I love the fact that the recorder just wants to record stuff randomly bjahsjdhd. Elias feels a lot like Michael in the sense that he knows more than he should and talks in a way that implies he just wants to wait and see how things play out for his own benefit. I understand him knowing the things that happened but his description of her emotions implies something paranormal. Maybe he's connected to one of the entities. Which one I cannot guess.

ep 83: did a file get delivered randomly to the place he's staying at? Probably elias lmao. He thinks the mannequin is related to the stranger. Idk I would believe it.

ep 84: worms? I know he says earth worms but idk. Again? Is she making gordon golems out of trash? Martin popping off. You can tell the statements get to him more that they get to Jon. How come martin is so mad about it? I want to assume he just doesnt want her to get stuck there but idk. Jude Perry. The calliope organ. Jon heard a circus in one of the last episodes

ep 89: he's talking to perry? Like jude Perry? He says ... God? Is that what it is? Lmao. The Desolation. Jon is tired of ppl being vague and not telling him stuff lmao. Oh God Jon is so confused. Compel her? Is she assuming he has some kind of power? Does he have powers? Hmm. im agreeing with jon here please jesus christ why does everyone have to be so cryptic. Just say what you mean. "maybe you get an itchy eye" bahasjkdfklsjdf girl what. Agnes saved her? Oh this is the girl from the cafe story? So theres the Cult of the Lightless Flame? They worship whatever entity this is? The Desolation? Why do they all seem like they sorta worship her then? Is Gretchen gonna die oh god. fuckin michael. a different michael aaah. i see. dont do it shes gonna burn you. sir. please. sir dont you dare do- WHAT DID I SAY what did you think was gonna happen hhh.

ep 90: try to make it less obvious you're trying to get fired big T. Elias that doesnt sound like the most healthy thing to do. oh dear is this gonna be triggering for me. uuuuuh. uuuuuuuuuh. doesnt seem like it ok gonna keep listening. Jared. hmmmmm. Ok we've seen Keay and hotner or whatever his name was.

ep 91: Michael Crew. Oh is this the lightning scar guy. Mister jon sir did you just die. No? God everyone is so fuckin cryptic. Say normal things please. They all just like to go on about pain and agony and j e s u s c h r i s t we get it you got hurted by whatever thing. So theyre avatars? question mark? Jude Perry is an avatar of The Desolation? hhhh fractals. thats a spiral thing innit. Yup. messing with your perceptions. God they all talk about feeding their god and feeding that which feeds them and. hh what does that meann. Leave big J. please. uh oh. is it daisy? how come he has the web lighter still? the tape recorder just turns on sometimes you know how it is. So he can compel people? not that he knows it obviously but. a bit wack. powers go brr i guess? If the eye just wants knowledge i guess he feeds it by getting the statements? b/c i doubt it wants him to murder ppl or whatever.

ep 92: elias you all knowing fuck what do you know. (i guess all given what i just said) Lukas. Heard of them before. Mordecai Lukas. Loneliness. The lonely even. Jonah Magnus. Elias ur sounding like a bit of a dickhead rn. lmao jon's just like "i dont care" elias what is ur deal. Why does he want to tie her in. ohh i see. lmao theyre all just like "elias why" The Unknowing lol seems very much like something the eye wouldnt like. lol elias is gettin all philosophical. what does it really mean to be human. this still doesnt answer why gertrude wanted to destroy the archives tho.

ep 93: bahsjdfh he seems so dead inside rip. awww admiral. i love him already. ghh breacon and hope. purple mold. doesnt sound like anything we've seen so far. I think the funniest explanation for breacon and hope is that they dont actually serve the stranger they just kinda happen to be a random neutral party that cart around random spooky entity related stuff. ooooh. when we hear the slight static of the tape recorder it's cuz he's compelling ppl.

ep 94: the end! listen man they were all just grayed up for 4/13.

ep 95: the end also? death but also savagery/ animalistic shit. aww martin. lmao becerra. she's just been chillin in the corner.

ep 96: return to sender. haha minecraft go brr. prediction: breacon and hope? yup there we go. jon why is there an echo. are you in a stairwell? is he gonna eat it- yup. how did i call it. unsure abt what theyre talking about but ok. they kidnapped someone? Sarah Baldwin. ooooh that guy.

ok im just putting this here so i have notes for when nicholas gets to this part. It seems like (from jon's conversation with jude perry) that the desolation and the eye are kinda at odds with eachother? like i guess not directly but it seems like they dont really vibe? so how could be with both. Cuz if he has the heat powers and shit then we know he's an avatar of the desolation. but then why does he have so much eye imagery. also he got burned intentionally? like jude did when she went on her monologue about the feeling of burning? but then why did he wear the eye pendant. it stops him from being burned all the way which seems like he's not fully accepting the fire or whatever.

Nooooo I lost like a bunch of my notes rip. I keep forgetting to save.

Ep 104: tim gives a coherent statement without jon even being there. Ugh. Fucking robert smirk. Dont like him. Joey. Dont recognize the name. The show must go on. Clown. The spooky circus?

ep 105: total war... shogun 2? jon is just understanding languages again. "if i understood mandarin or cantonese" are you sure you dont big man?

ep 106: havent we heard this one already? mans in space? oh no this is just another episode in space. fairchild... uuuh. cant remember. oh! this is related to that! this is one of the ppl from the other side. sounds like a Vast thing. oh he's the one that the dude saw? but that guy didnt have a face... she's sorta like jon. wanting to dismiss the statements. lmao i love the workplace gossip. ace jon for the win! oh cmon elias dont be a dick. sunny meadows or whatever. thats the place we heard about.

ep 107: oh great is it jude perry again. Third Degree. bahahsdkfj she was arrested. sorry but imagining this old british lady getting arrested is funny. she was trying to resurrect him. using the skin book. he's not feeling well. jon take a nap. i wonder if this is what happens when he uses his powers too much. He gets into The Zone when he reads statements lol. didn't we have a burning train car in anothre statement? is it julia fairchild? bahahahs "kidnapped. Again." poor jon honestly. julia... about her dad. daughter of the murder shed guy? hunting like your dad liked to hunt or normal people hunting. oh hunting vampires!

ep 108: melanie has been suffering. poor martin peter lukas why do you have to be like this. can he not just use the front door? does he have to bother the ppl doing statements?

ep 109: how come he cut her off? kinda rude tbh. its either jon's influence or there was smth he didnt want her saying. is it gerard on the table? this sounds kinda like smth from one of the university episodes. is it the closed eye on the hand? yup. he's like one of the students! if the thing listening in is elias then... he can do that without the tape recorder yknow. plus who's to say it wont just turn itself on again

110: who wants to bet its a leitner?

111: Lukas related to The Lonely. I used to not like Gerard that much but i like him more now. but i thought there were 15? ohhh thats right isnt flesh newer? gerry for the win honestly. finally telling jon things.

112: lol "again" no one ever tells any of these ppl anything. tim and basira are just out of the loop constantly. music, like the war episodes. The hunt or the slaughter? probably the hunt. so Daisy is related to the hunt right? basira likes the reading, she's doing fine at the institute. daisy's getting worried...

113: it just turned on randomly. what is it lol. explossives! oh boy. why do they always assume he turned it on intentionally. melanie youre not making me like you that much. which entity is this about i cant tell. lol he was disappointed it was just the end. The title Breathing Room made me think it was gonna be about the buried but i guess not. So many of these entities deal with death but the end is one that deals in just death. it has no need for fancy deaths, just death is enough

114: more hilltop road statements? the tree. oh boy. ok the tree has 8 arms obviously theres the spider parallels. was she taken into an alternate universe? oh no. jon tries to phrase things so he's not asking questions. thats honestly good. "sometimes i was kidnapped" oh dear. they got gertrude. daisy ur so odd lmao. who wants to bet they dont know the tape recorder's running?

115: silaca? or whatever? antique man? meat grinder... related to the meat is meat episode? oh wow. they buy antiques from him. maybe dont antagonize this creature which can kill you?

116: lol theyre all just so done with elias. music? is it like the one band that if you hear them you die or wtvr. oh its chess? i am very much confused. mmm stranger go brr. gorilla skin? oh shit the dance. woah. this is so good. this is so gender. the words are wonderful. "you can just say tim" lmao trying to fool elias never feels like a good idea.

117: except elias lmaoo. oh shit. leitner getting some use for once idk. bruuh poor melanie she has been thru so much shit. martin you can just say youre worried about jon. lol he's so accurate in his jon impression. lol who was that. was that daisy? lmaoo. oop hi tim. oh god i hope tim doesnt die. i feel like i wouldve heard about that? but im not sure. destroying the source of knowledge is gonna be hard for jon. yay jon! you did a good thing. let him rest.

118: go off martin lmao. awww poor martin. oh god the tape gets that squealy quality and its awful.

119: woah. lots of things happening. uhh. POP OFF TIM!!

120: lmao elias giving a statement about jon's dreams lol. damn jon doesnt even get his own dreams? has to stay Watching even when he's asleep? f in the chat this man goes thru so much shit. oh boy its peter. lol martin my beloved. idk i dont trust peter.

#tma #neptune's tma notes #notes #tma season 3

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angeltrapz · 3 years

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hhmmmmvnfj asks abt Lawrence? umm in a selfship way: what’s ur favorite gift he’s gotten u? — in a character analysis way, bcuz I’ve posted a lil abt it n u mentioned it in DMs too: if William had survived, bc Lawrence was handling new disciples at that time (like Brad n Ryan), how do u think Lawrence n William would’ve interacted? (esp bc we know William was at least vaguely aware of who Lawrence was pre-trap bc of their connections to John)

dfhskj thank u!!! finally getting 2 this

okay fr the selfship part: mentioned it a little bit when replying 2 the other ask u sent, but it’s a worry stone made out of rhodonite (which looks a lil like this), bc he knows how interested I am in gems + rocks n stuff like that but also bc he wanted me to have smth to fidget with in case I forgot my lil lanyard of rolling beads when we went somewhere! it’s smth I just run my thumb along bc it’s smooth n soft n fits perfectly in the palm of my hand. a lot of times if I’m in an uncomfortable situation I can’t get out of, having that w me helps a lot bc it’s grounding n it reminds me of him 💞💞

fr the character analysis part: KJSKFS YEAH I love getting 2 talk abt that bc I actually think abt it quite a bit. as u said, William and Lawrence have always been vaguely aware of each other on account of being connected thru their interactions w John, the doctor who he felt wasn’t kind/sympathetic enough n the insurance agent who denied his (EXTREMELY experimental, mind u) foreign treatment request. I’m not sure that they ever interacted face-to-face PRIOR to John’s death, but after William survives his test it’s just kinda like... who else does he have 2 talk to that might be able to understand even the tiniest bit what he went thru? he loves Pamela to pieces, of course he does, she’s his only family - but she didn’t see what he’d had to do, doesn’t rly KNOW like Lawrence would.

but I still think he’d absolutely be Cautious, bc even w the desire to be understood n maybe even have someone he could confide in, William knows now that Lawrence has been helping John for quite some time - as we see in 3D and as u said, Lawrence is the one handling new disciples, something that only John ever did; Amanda didn’t have her own apprentices, n Hoffman sure as hell didn’t either. that, n William doesn’t know how much involvement, if any, Lawrence had w his own test - that’s smth that wld haunt him a lil, I think. it’s hard to be comfortable around a person who is not only directly involved w the person who felt it necessary to put u in a trap, but who Also may have been the one to put fucking explosive bracelets/anklets n tattoos on u + SEWN A KEY inside of u, which is INCREDIBLY violating of his bodily autonomy. that could warrant a whole discussion of its own tbh.

but. Lawrence is the closest John ever got 2 having a TRUE successor (which I have conflicting feelings on; my reading of Lawrence in SAW 2004 was not someone who wld have joined up w someone who caused him so much pain, but fr the sake of exploring this, I think tht after going thru something as horribly traumatizing and irreversibly changing as he did, he sought that life of control n routine that he felt he had prior to his game, and well, John could certainly provide that,,,) n William would likely know this. Amanda’s dead, Logan is off doing who knows what n living his life, Hoffman is only doing it out of a weird sense of obligation?, and Jill isn’t rly a disciple, just some1 who’s been dragged into it too. (I think William n Jill actually would’ve gotten along tbh,, it’s a different thing entirely whether William would WANT to interact w her.)

I think Lawrence wld want to be able to reassure William that he had no hand in what happened to him (I don’t even know if Lawrence is the one who fitted the bracelets/did the key?), but he like. wouldn’t even know where 2 begin bc how can he explain that in a way that William could ever rely on? how could he ever convince William that he truly wasn’t responsible when all the other man wld have 2 do is look at all of th ppl he assisted John in securing/operating on? Hoffman was the one who put William in his trap, but Lawrence doesn’t know he’ll ever b able 2 prove that in a way William can believe. n I don’t think he’d expect William to believe him, not at all, but I think Lawrence at that point truly doesn’t have anyone - he and Alison are divorced and she has Diana, Adam isn’t around obviously, John + Amanda are gone, Hoffman doesn’t know he exists, so who does he have? I think he longs fr that sort of connection, even if it Is forged thru smth as terrible as what they were both individually put thru by John - they have tht common ground of being involved in his diagnosis + the way he responded to them (petty fucking grievances... kramer I will literally knock yr teeth in u fucker) n being ppl he considered partially responsible fr his downfall in a way (Lawrence wasn’t “kind enough,” William said no to a highly expensive and experimental international treatment that they weren’t even sure wld WORK). and like, not necessarily 2 the same extent, but they were both physically altered by what they went thru. Lawrence is missing his foot. William has scars + tattoos that he could get covered up, sure, but the experience isn’t going away. the scar on his side where the key was hidden is never going away. Lawrence’s prosthetic is functioning but the fact that he cut his fucking foot off isn’t going away. n that’s not even TOUCHING the lasting mental effects.

so I think William wld be feeling rly lost. he just doesn’t know what to do. he doesn’t know if he can even go back to the life he led b4 (if he does, it’s not for a very long time) n he has a hard time looking Pamela in the eye bc he feels personally responsible fr her having been there too + bc of what he’d been made to do to so many ppl. he feels alone, much more than he ever has before, n that’s saying smth bc his personal life was already extremely solitary bc he felt it was safer for him + his career. no one could possibly understand what he went thru, bc nobody saw it. nobody saw the way he tried so hard to keep every1 alive, the way he tried to help the people he worked with + CARED FOR even if he had 2 put himself thru pain to do it (holding onto those pulleys until his shoulders were almost DISLOCATED fr Addy n Allen, burning himself w the steam so Debbie could get thru the maze, the entirety of the shotgun carousel). Tara + Brent didn’t see him sacrifice himself fr his coworkers, n neither did Pamela. nobody knows. William wants some1 to connect with, n that just doesn’t seem like a possibility given that what he went thru in there is knowledge that only he himself + Hoffman carry.

but Lawrence knows. he understands n he's the one 2 kinda make that offer, to just be like “u don’t have 2 trust me right now, or even ever, but I understand n if u want some1 2 talk to, I’m here.” bc what does he have to lose? Adam is gone. Alison n Diana are gone. he’s by himself. and so is William, though he has Pamela. they’re both men who went thru smth unspeakably terrible bc a dying man wanted 2 play god n they came out of it much worse off than they ever were b4 John “helped” them. n William is just like. how much worse could it get? after Jigsaw, what could possibly be worse than what he’s already gone thru? so he’s just kind of like, “okay, we can work this out, I can’t say I trust u right now but maybe I can in the future. we can do this together. we can help each other.” n that’s how they end up meeting for coffee or breakfast/lunch/dinner every so often (coffee meets are at least weekly), n it’s just kind of like. the reassurance that some1 has seen the very worst parts of u and are still around. the relief of knowing someone sees u and knows how hard yr fighting to rebuild a life that’s been shattered into a million tiny pieces. n they’re struggling against that current together, and maybe it starts in a place of “I have no one else so I might as well chill w u,” but eventually William and Lawrence kind of fall into this uneasy friendship. they’re there for each other. William calls Lawrence when he has a nightmare that keeps him up fr hours after, shaking n w his heart beating out of his chest bc he doesn’t want to remember. Lawrence spends th night at William’s place every now n then bc he can’t be alone w his thoughts n the phantom pain in his leg just won’t quiet. they meet for coffee. they have breakfast sometimes. Lawrence has clothes n a toothbrush at William’s and vice versa. they’re in this together.

n maybe that escalates into more (which I believe wld only happen after they get 2 a point where they’ve discussed, at length, John’s legacy n who exactly would be continuing it + if anyone WLD be, n after Hoffman is “disposed of” in a sense), but even if not, they both know they Have Someone who looks at them n doesn’t see them as a monster, not the horrible person John thought he needed to “fix.” they both carry scars, both physically n mentally, frm what they went thru. they’re both struggling to get their bearings + Lawrence is still coping w what he’ll need to do after John’s (and eventually, Jill’s) passing. it won’t be easy, but they’re not walking alone. they’re wading thru the mud together, hand in hand, and fr William n Lawrence, that is enough.

#yes I also hc William as trans!!! not rly mentioned directly but putting that here #thank u thank u!! LOVE getting 2 talk abt stuff like this #saw #william #lawrence #I had. way more thoughts on this than I thought I did oops #long post #asks

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reversecreek · 3 years

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struts onto the dash carrying this deliriously wriggling little elf in my arms like a swaddled bebe......... they’re genuinely my oldest muse of all time i think i created them when i was like. 13 possibly. n i haven’t written them in Years but. i’m literally so excited to jst vibrating w muse. smiles at u all demurely..... they have risen. u can find their pinterest here n their playlist here.

* alana champion, nonbinary + they/them | you know nyla palmer, right? they’re twenty-two, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, eight months? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to 6669 (i don’t know if you know) by neon indian like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole a two headed doll of a prairie girl with stitched on rabbit ears and butterfly wings, befriending shadow puppets & finding god with your eyes open underwater in a public pool you broke into thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is march 2nd, so they’re a pisces, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nai, 24, gmt she/her )

HISTORY:

was born in georgiaaaa georgiaaaa (phoebe bridgers voice holds my bang...) to a vry honest hard working man named george (omgggg he’s called GEORGE and he’s from GEORGIA? ahaaaaa fuckk ur jestinggg) nd a woman who did her best named pamela..... george worked on a construction site n pamela was a pharmacist..... their house was this small rickety white thing with a wrap around porch n a very rabid overgrown garden tht kind of looked like the earth ws trying to reclaim it bc nobody ever hd the time or motivation to mow the lawn.... there ws literally a piece of fold out furniture just entirely submerged by weeds n foliage

nyla ws always closest w their dad george..... he hd this way of looking at the world tht was seeing the best in all of it.... he took them on long walks where he talked abt how u have to respect the trees bc they’re breathing fr us n we’re breathing fr them..... he hd a strange whimsical sense of humour n a gnome alter ego called grundlebolt who always tickled them..... in a way this closeness created a distance between nyla n their mother but not so much that it ws rly a problem. just enough tht nyla sometimes waited until their mother ws out of eye n ear shot to tell their dad they loved him bc they didn’t wna make her sad >_>

(mental health, death & grief tw) pamela always struggled w her mental health but george ws great n understanding n knew how to help her thru this... nyla didn’t get it too greatly at a very young age bt they knew their mum got “the sads” sometimes (how their dad wld explain tht she needed to lay down in the quiet for a while or why she’d stood at the stove n let the dinner burn until the smoke detector went off without doing anything abt it). when nyla was 14 they got home one day to a police car in the driveway n came prancing in exuberantly as they always did. immediately hugged the legs of an officer bc this is hw they wld greet everyone they ever met. they only realised something was wrong when they let go n saw their mum sat at the table crying. essentially there ws an accident at the construction site george worked at n :/ yeah.

(jst mental health & grief tw now) this rly had an intense ripple effect on everyone tbh. pamela’s mental health deteriorated quite a lot without george there as her rock n nyla sort of had to step in as best they cld but it was....... hard. some days she ws better bt some days nyla had to sit her in the bath n stroke a wet sponge over her back bc they didn’t know how else to calm her down. nyla always had a very overactive imagination which george encouraged bt it ws like. losing him rly opened a window in nyla’s head n all rationality went floating out of it. their dreams seemed more real than being awake. fantasy wasn’t jst the way they coped bt it was the way they thought n the way they saw. everything on earth was alive. the trees n the clouds n the wall with a brick missing at the bottom of her road n especially their dad. their dad was alive in everything in nyla’s head. the sun shining extra bright in the morning was george. ponds were a veil they could dunk her head under and find george waiting on the other side. reality rly just pulled the plug n said bye tbh n they were ok w that <3

(abuse implied tw) their mum remarried too fast to a man named stephen n it was jst not a good arrangement. he was Not a nice man. i won’t go into this but home wasn’t a nice place for nyla any more n after a couple of yrs stephen wound up asking them to leave n their mum said nothing to contradict tht. there’s more to this bt long story short nyla left <3

(drugs tw) they couch surfed fr a while before settling living w their best friend. they got up to like... all sorts of trouble n grew up far too fast. nyla’s lack of sense n realism hd a habit of getting them into some sticky situations n these few yrs were a rollercoaster where they got by on the skin of their teeth. when they think of high skl they think of gravel and skinned knees and sucking sherbet dunkers to ignore the taste of pennies in ur mouth and getting lost in the woods a lot bc they’d take FAR too many drugs n be lead astray having conversations with kind trees whose branches held their hands

(drug mention) got by on odd jobs like making candles n selling them at market stalls. leaf blowing at cemeteries. face painting fr children’s parties (where they were blatantly high). random stuff. all over the place. in this time them n their best friend also hd a sugar daddy named tony who always wore very impressive colour block suits n mink stoles n jewelled fedoras n hd a swanky apartment w marble floors. rly just. surreal. lots of strange stories frm this time.

things kind of blew up in their friendship group n they fell out w their best friend raya bc she slept w this guy aj who nyla hd been madly in love w for yrs.... he was a Stinker n honestly so ws their best friend so good riddance i say bt obviously it felt like having their entire world flipped upside dwn fr nyla.... they split after this came out bc they just did Not want to b around these ppl any more n they decided to leave w this guy frm a band they barely knew tht much save fr a one night stand to tour w them..... this ws another whirlwind. jst chock full of them. it ws similar to being on a teacup ride at a carnival n spinning round n round n only knowing u were surrounded by lots of lights. tht’s how they’d best describe their time on tour.

SO in terms of them coming to irving 8 months ago they came w the band.... they honestly did pretty well on tour n wound up renting a big beach house on dorado as a kind of “retreat” sort of place fr them to shack up in while they worked on writing and recording their first big studio album (they gt signed w a label so it’s all vry exciting stuff). nyla among like 3 others were allowed to stay w them too bc they hd a lot of fun on tour. literally jst. taken on as professional groupies essentially. nyla loved it bc they’d never seen the ocean n when they first got there they jst threw off all their clothes n ran straight into the water. it was 3pm on a tuesday afternoon. they got arrested fr public indecency n didn’t get why bc they were like but i just wanted to hug the ocean u silly little oinker? i picture the beach house as like. the loudest one on dorado.... comes alive like a jungle at night..... they r probably bad neighbours. anyway. onto personality puts hand on hip.

PERSONALITY:

sets out patio furniture on someone else’s lawn n jst takes a seat n leans back like ahhhhh vat a nice day to be alive ya! (swedish accent suddenly bc they think it’s fun). they come out n start yelling n they’re jst so confused they’re like hey wat’s the big idea hey wat’s go on here why u angies why this happen?

likes drawing imaginary veins over their arms in all different colour blue pens in a sudden fit of hyperfixation n then forgets all abt it n goes out like tht n scares several townsfolk bt they’re oblivious they’re jst in her own world loving life already onto the next fixation. has many many different fads like this. one day will jst start snipping up a bunch of magazines bc they’re like EYES ARE COOL N THEY SEE EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P n they’ll stick a bunch of them over their wall n then forget they was doing that n leap onto the next. quite a pattern. bt they love the vein thing a lot it makes them feel like a walking planetarium like they have their own constellations

sometimes jst doesn’t make sense. they’re honestly kind of strange. pops up in places like they suddenly materialised there n it’s like how did u get there where have u been when were u last seen are u ok. has the energy of an ancient deity frm deep in a mountain cave n an ambiguous forest sprite all at once..... talks shit honestly. abt anything n everything. sometimes outrageous. sometimes plain incoherent. like what are u talking about? i dnt kno. even i dnt kno sometimes.

luvs stick n pokes will let anyone tattoo whatever they want on them for the price of a gummy bear kindly placed onto their tongue n swallowed whole

has this obsession w being underwater w their eyes open luvs it. calls it their tadpole time. runs baths just to lie there blinking looking around n drifting her arms. best friends w the bottom of any local swimming pool n hs probably given it a quick kiss so it knows they’re bff’s n then got sick bc there’s sm germs in a public pool. says the kgb probably poisoned their oatmeal n r finally here to deliver on their promise n THAT’S why they got sick unrelated to the pool incident. what promise? noone knows.

unclear if they believe what they say or if they jst has a very expanded sense of humour where they nvr let on if they’re joking.... lines r blurred a lot.....

loves excitedly shouting things. sometimes just screams at the sky bc they say it’s good to let the creatures in ur belly fly out every once in a while otherwise their wings get sore.

(drugs tw) still does an excessive amt of hallucinogens n it kind of shows. very bad fr their brain bt we’re going to ignore it.

dresses fun n strange n eccentric n careless. loves to experiment. does nt care abt what’s considered to be societally appropriate. living in their own world.

sleeps around a lot... jst doesn’t rly see sex as a big deal.... very free w themselves in that way..... sometimes greets their friends w a kiss on the lips they’re like awww :) kisses <3 when they run into them in the middle of the cereal aisle n then pulls away n suddenly breaks into a box tht has a free toy in it bc it’s a banana with googly eyes n that’s the best thing they’ve ever heard in their LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! n isn’t he so HANDSOME????? enchante indeed my good sir ;)... gives the toy a kiss too.

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

other groupies of the band: self explanatory a little.... i dnt have a name for the band yet bt all can b worked out..... i picture them as kind of. not that nice but like. there for a good time........ rock genre.... bit chaotic...... to say the least........ they dnt have to have come there w the band like nyla n the others they cld have been adopted in their time there.... whoever wld b wild n down fr a good time <3

chaotic trash goblin friends: idk what this title rly means it just came to me in a vision....... jst ppl tht r rly kind of off the rails n don’t care abt anything...... they r who nyla tends to mesh very well w......... they rly r living in their own world n by their own rules n they like ppl who do this too <3 inevitably they get up to no good n party far too much...... cld be angst to this if they enable each other’s bad habits...... world’s our oyster. opens my office door. let’s talk abt it.

nyla set up camp on their front lawn: maybe jst w a fold out chair. maybe w a literal pop up tent w someone else too. genuinely so bizarre of them bt that’s what we’re dealing with. they poke their head into the tent n nyla’s lying down crunching on a cracker crumbs over their tits n they just hold it out to them nt even fully consumed n are like hey polly want a cracker? :)

they responded to her craigslist ad: they posted one saying they cld cleanse their house of demonic energy bc they’re an all seeing eye in touch w the spirits. this is a lie. they came n waved sage around n did a little dance as they did it w bird sounds playing on a special cd they brought fr the occasion (had weird indistinct doodles over the case it ws brought in) n then ws like OOH! scary.... n jumped at something in the hall. they go in thinking maybe they’ve seen a ghost bt they just were startled by their own reflection in a mirror n is like. scary mirror placement...... might wna reconsider that........ they charge them merely 10 dollars fr their time n is like this was so fun we shd do it again some time :) also i think u have mould on ur bathroom tile! vanishes. they dnt recall them ever going to the bathroom.

came knocking asking for items for a garage sale: yes. u heard that right. they’re asking for ur muses things to set up their own garage sale. selling items that do not belong to them. they think this is a genius business strategy n don’t understand why ppl think this is so strange or why they cant just ask ppl to donate them things to sell bc hey they’re an entrepreneur? they even had a pencil behind their ear when they knocked on the door so why aren’t ppl taking their business seriously? probably got distracted several times trying to explain their pitch n chattered abt random other things instead.

honestly anything... fwbs... flings... good influence... someone who cnt stand the fact they’re barely coherent.... someone they stopped on the street one day n asked for their opinion on water beds.... we cn do literally anything. fling ur chara my way n we can talk.

#irvingintro #mental health tw #death tw #grief tw #drugs tw #abuse tw

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