#why wont my mum let me be

[lulublack90]

Prompt 11 - Fake Date

@wolfstarmicrofic May 11, word count 875

“Eugh, my mum keeps asking who I’m bringing to my cousin's wedding!” Remus groaned as he checked the new message on his phone. “She’s getting worse. Ever since Oscar and I broke up it’s all she cares about.” He shook his head and put on a high-pitched voice, imitating Hope. “Reemuss,” He elongated his name like Hope did with her lilting accent. “Remus, why don’t you have a nice boy to bring to Gwen’s wedding? You should go find yourself someone, Remus.” He grimaced. “Like it’s so easy. She met dad in the middle of a forest when that guy jumped out of the trees at her and dad came to her rescue. Knowing my luck, the would be murderer would fall for me.” He leaned his head back and cursed the heavens. 

Sirius had sat there patiently listening to Remus grouse. He snatched Remus’s phone from his lap and typed a quick message to Hope. 

“There,” He said. “Now you have a date.” He grinned mischievously. Remus paled. 

“What did you do?” He picked up his phone and gasped. “Sirius! What the actual?!” His phone pinged as Hope started gushing about how happy she was and how much she’d always loved Sirius. He had to put his phone on silent to shut it up. Sirius had messaged Hope telling her that he was bringing Sirius as his date. Sirius who he’d had a crush on for years and told his mother every little thing about it. Oh gods, this was going to be a disaster. 

“It’ll be fine, Remus. I’ll pretend to be your boyfriend for the day, and then we’ll mysteriously break up, none of them will be the wiser, and it'll make your mum happy.” Remus groaned into his hands. 

They travelled to Wales the day before the wedding and stayed at Remus’s parents house. Lyall greeted them at the door but then disappeared into his study. He was happy in there and Remus was happy he was in there, to be honest. They’d never quite seemed to quite understand each other and this way was easier, much to Hope’s annoyance. 

Hope, on the other hand, wrapped them both in her arms and cooed over Sirius.

“I knew you’d end up together. You’re perfect for each other.” Sirius lapped it up. The only problem they had was Hope put them in Remus’s old bedroom. They hadn’t thought of that when they’d agreed to stay there. There wasn’t even another spare room. 

“It’ll be fun,” Sirius beamed. “Like being back at school.” 

“We never shared a bed. That was you and James,” Remus reminded him. 

“Well, better late than never then, I guess,” Sirius responded. So that was how Remus found himself in bed with Sirius. 

Thankfully, morning came quickly and then it was time for the wedding. 

Everybody made a fuss about Sirius.

“He’s so handsome Remus,” His grandmother had declared when he’d introduced him. “You ought to put a ring on his finger, so he doesn’t get away,” She’d said loudly. Remus went beet red. 

“Nain, you can’t just yell that out!” He hushed her. 

“And why not? I want to see some great grand kids before I pop my clogs, and you aren’t getting any younger,”

“Oh my god,” He didn’t know how to handle her apart from with a gin and tonic and the bar wasn’t open yet. 

“Don’t you worry, Mrs Howell, I’ll make an honest man out of him.” Sirius said, linking her arm with his and leading her away to her table. He turned and winked at Remus. Remus wished he could turn invisible. 

By the end of the wedding, Sirius had won over all of Remus’s family and all of the grooms. In fact, more people knew who Sirius was at the wedding than knew who Remus was. 

Remus was glad when they were on their way back to his parents house. It had been a long day. “So,” Sirius asked him. “When are you going to pop the question? Your Nain’s promised me her engagement ring.” He grinned, fighting back a laugh at Remus. 

“Oh, haha, Sirius,” Remus rolled his eyes and said no more about the subject. 

That night, much to Remus’s surprise, Sirius snuggled under his arm and rested his head on Remus’s chest. 

“I had fun today.” Sirius told him with a sleepy voice. “Your family is really nice, and I might just steal your Nain. She was brilliant.” He turned his head to look at Remus. “Thank you for letting me come.” He said quietly. 

“You invited yourself. I had nothing to do with it.” Remus huffed. 

He closed his eyes hoping Sirius would take the hint. But instead, Sirius pushed up and kissed him. Remus’s eyes shot open, and he stared at Sirius. 

“I was serious about that ring, Moony. Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be there.” Remus didn’t know what to say, so he dragged Sirius’s face back to his and kissed him deeper than their first. He melted as Sirius kissed him back. “Took you long enough,” Sirius murmured against his lips. Remus had never been happier. He made a note to send a bottle of champagne to his cousin, because without her this might never have happened.   

#wolfstar #wolfstar microfic #wolfstar fic #wolfstar au #wolfstar angst #wolfstar fluff #remus lupin #sirius black #remus john lupin #sirius orion black #hope lupin #lyall lupin #hope lupins mother #nain Howell #wedding #why wont my mum let me be #sirius x remus #remus x sirius #sirius and remus #remus and sirius #oh you like me two #didn't see that coming #fake date

[allaboutbethsblog]

my best friend isn't talking to me as much anymore, and I feel like we're distancing.

We don't hang out anymore like we used to.

we don't call. (we used to facetime each other every other night)

We don't message each other as often as we used to.

she only wants me when she has no one else. and I'm not doing that anymore, and she's using me.

I'm not gonna let her use me anymore.

I do talk to her when I'm on the bus in the mornings. Most of the time, I'm tired and don't want to talk. I do listen to her, though

next month she's moving house and when I go into college in September she won't be on the bus.

the last thing i want to say is:

I still call her my best friend.

#i dont know what to tag this #shes changed #shes moving house and after she moves i wont see her as much anymore. #i loved her. (platonically) #i loved her hugs. #i dont know what im gonna do without her #i feel like were distancing #but im gonna listen to my mum and not let her use me again #im not very sociable so i guess thats why i feel like were distancing #idk 🤷‍♀️ #does this make sense?

[redpiperfox]

But mainly, and really:

#red's week in music #STORYTIME WITH RED GATHER ROUND KIDDOS! #was at kids club tonight and went in knowing little 8 year olds mom had her baby this morning and lil girl was now big sis if two #and knew she hadnt come from home bc her hair was a mess of someone who didnt know curls trying to do it lol #shes generally emotional and dramatic but we can all see that shes a lil more so tonight. understandably. lotsa change #well she kinda hinges on this one thing of not getting the verses said to earn a jewel bc she wasnt able to say them-- totally fine! we'll #practice and get them later! but shes distraught bc she worked on them with mum and wont get jewel so i keep telling her when we'll work on #them together and when ill listen to her and we can get it done. cool. then lesson time shes up and down sniffly and the lesson says smth #about childbirth-- bursts into disarray. i ask her if she wants to step out and we blow her nose and she keeps talking about the verse so i #tell her solutions for that and then shes working herself up so i work thru calming down and she goes from #“i think im mad” to ��mom would let me do what i want!” and i know the real issue isnt the verse but thats what shes telling me so... #adult shes staying with cautiously steps in and she calms down to tell me “its not the verse... i think i miss my mom” #oh my heart i know honey i give her a hug and we talk about the sleeover shes going to have and when shes going to see mom #and shes sleeping next to lil sis so shes going to give sis a big hug and tell her theyre going to see mom in the morning #and then i ask her if she wants to go back and she does and i just hold her and hug her the whole time #i give her another squeeze when she leaves and tell her to enjoy her sleepover #her friend shes staying with i should not did a very sweet of coming over and saying “hey lookit this new book i got do you wanna color it #with me maybe?“ which was such an emotionally mature thing for her and to see lil kiddo cheer up warmed me #teachers we debriefed and talked about kids going thru stuff at home and not being able to tell and process their emotions and stuff #and then i shared with mum on the ride back and she goes “yup. lil toddler will just miss mom-- its trauma at this age. this is why i #panicked and called my mother to come for your sis's birth bc dad said he could handle you but my heart couldnt for what you would go thru.“ #i was six when my sister was born. my grandma being there before consistently made me giddly excited in that time waiting for dad to bring #us to the hospital. #anyway my heart was full and im praying extra hard for two lil girls in a sleepover missing their mom tonight. #red's personal sitcom #Spotify

[milf-harrington]

i will never be mad at or blame my sister for the situation she has been forced into, but i will forever be frustrated with our family for the responsibility thats been shoved onto me

"he'll have a village" my ass, he's got two mentally ill siblings and a FIFO worker who are all in their 20's

#its such bullshit and its so fucking hard listening to everyone go one about how much they love him #and how lucky he is to have a big family #where the fuck are they then!!!! why is it my job!!! #and i am NOT complaining about helping my sister or looking after my nephew #if youve been here long enough you 1. have probably heard this rant before and 2. know how much i love them #but fuck #my sister's looking at getting a fulltime job which sucks for both of us #im going to have to handle more responsibility and she's barely going to see her fucking son #like fuck you (our family) #ive been helping my sister since i fucking graduated so ive never been able to get a job #i dont even know if im going to be able to leave for my birthday like i planned because im just going to be stressed and guilty #about leaving my sister to handle everything alone for a week #(<- she would yell at me for that thought but i cant help it) #and my fucking cousin has the fucking guts to tell me it 'breaks her heart' that my nephew is shy around her #that he doesnt recognise or know her; but she's following her happiness in the city #which yeah!! good for her!! but dont fucking complain to me about not knowing my nephew #when you wont even bother to call him on his birthday #dont praise me for how much i help my sister like it was ever an option for me #'your sister is so lucky to have tou' yeah cause she doesnt have anyone fucking else #shes not even comfortable letting our mum have him without me there bc mum just fucking sucks #i dont care if im not being fair i just had to hold back from fucking bawling when i got hit with how unfair it is #4 years ago i thought id be in university studying art and saving up to go to italy #and now im 20 and im practically about to become a fulltime parent #and if IM tired i cant even imagine what my sisters going through #yknow shes always wanted to be a stay-at-home mum? #she only got the first 6 months #im just filled with dread and frustration and a bitter sort of sadness #but at least my nephew is a really cool dude to hang out with #and hey i might get better at cooking ajdjs #vent

[thatonemouseykid]

was thinking about if midoriya inherited his dad/parents' quirk(s) and the fact that having a fire quirk might make it even harder for him to do battle with todoroki's trauma but, counterpoint: theoretically his parents' quirks would combine into some form of pyrokinesis so imagine todoroki being all dramatic after the cavalry battle like

*summons some fire for the sake of this image* "i vowed never to use my left side. this fire, it's his"

and then midoriya just snatches it and goes "hmm, nah i think you'll find it's MINE now"

#yeah but no #if you didnt remember his dad has fire breath and his mum can move small objects #idk how to write things but just the idea of midorya being like was very funny to me #also him just juggling fire #midoriya izuku #mha quirks #mha #bnha #also i dont wanna become personally involved much in the mha fandom but its one of those things i just had to remove from my head #we'll see what happens #season 6 is on its way isnt it #my hero academia #shoto todoroki #OH its switched thats why it wont let me character tag w/o ships #izuku midoriya #good to know im not the only one who cant spell midoriya though

[unimportantweirdo]

am i having a crisis about my graduation? yes but not in the way you'd think

#im not proud of myself #im also not not proud of myself #basically i have everyone telling me that theyre proud of me and that the day is all about me and how i should be proud of my degree #and proud of all the shit that i went through with covid #but im not #im neutral about it #my brain wont let me be proud i guess #i survived? sure #so did everyone else #i got a 2:2? great #other people got better #i just feel nothing about it #and i dont want to pretend that i care about it #im going to graduation because my mum would be so upset if i didnt #id be fine with them just emailing me my certificate and leaving me alone #theres nothing special i wanna do or a way to celebrate #what am i gonna do? go out partying with my friends? what friends? i hate drinking why would i celebrate that way? #i dont know #ive been crying over everything being unfair for a while now #im tired and i want to hug someone #@ moots can i have a hug?

[movingmyselfon]

27/02/2024, 13:57pm

As if we'd get great news

#i can see the docs sort of giving up on mym #she dient wanna give any meds today just send mum awah and fucking monoto3 #i had to ask ans shes goven us sometbing thag has side effects im noy so jappy about #i can see my mums sadnedd and worry #shes talk8ng aboit me getti g married and quick #lets be honest i wont f #ans if i miraculously did...how would she even get tbelufh the day #im fucking tir3d of my life #why iw there not an ounce of happiness in there now #why is it always sad after sar #im begging allah please please give us good news. please im begging.tn #please give my mum shifa and long life. please let this med work really well and not give bad side effects. f #please give her more years.p #please let me get married this year. please let me find a better job this summer #please let me find my soulmate this summers im begging you allah please. #please let things gets better for this family this year pleaseu #im begging you. #mytalks

[rainbowgothdisaster]

i may support trans rights but i also support trans wrongs. i mean, did you see my first haircut?

#i was a mix between a karen and a tiki torch nazi. #not even exaggerating #like. #its why i wont judge the stereotypical deathhawk with colourful top and black/brown sides #bcuz 1 im not a cunt. #and 2 I DID SO MUCH WORSE #like legit. it was. hm. #then my mum took over cutting my hair and was just screaming 'WHO DID THIS TO YOU? YOUR FRIEND SHOULD NEVER CUT HAIR!' #bcuz she kept finding random short hairs and chunks that werent cut and also it was an atrocious style #literally one day he finished cutting my hair and i was like 'i look like a nazi dont i?' AND THE 3 PPL IN THE ROOM WERE LIKE '... yeah.' #came out of my manic episode like 'why did yall let me do this?' and now i have my current hairstyle #and i dont have any plans of changing it i really like it

[norizz-nation]

Hi can you do a Carlos x French reader smut I want the dynamic to be daddy and baby girl but can you don’t do directly the smut like can you explain before what happened to have them in bed if you can example what they were doing before🥹🫶🏻thx you’re the best🥰💓🫶🏻

Thank you so much sweetheart and I hope I can reach your expectations ❤️

My little angel ❤️

Summary: your parents finally allowed you to go abroad on a vacation and you decided to go to spain where things took a quick turn

Warnings: nsfw, 18+, daddy kink, size kink, choking, praise kink

“Please mum! Im 22 now! I can go out alone” you stated to your mum as she kept saying no for quite a few times. You then let out a frustrated sigh as your mum said “well just dont do anything illegal and dont get in trouble okay?” you then rolled your eyes and couldn’t help but laugh at what she just said. “Aweh mum dont worry” you said as you hugged her tightly.

Honestly you were loving Spain, the weather, the people, the atmosphere everything was so different than what its in France. It has been 2 days since you’re here, loving your sweet little trip. After roaming around in Madrid for a while you wanted to go to this museum although you didn’t like museums that much.

As you went there you sort of felt lost because you didn’t actually see the museum map before going inside which ended up you wandering here and there. All this time there was this man who was examining every move of yours from distance. You suddenly bumped to a man when you turned around and apologized immediately as you looked up at him who was looking at you with a smirk on his face. “You look like youre lost in this town, lost in this museum. Do you need help baby girl?” He asked, his tone was so polite and gentle. “Baby girl?” You asked as you furrowed your brows and crossed your arms together. He then chuckled at your question and started nodding his head. “I mean, you look really young and innocent. May i know what your name is?” He asked as he looked at you straight in the eye. “Im y/n not baby girl” you said as you rolled your eyes at him and he smiled. “Im carlos by the way. But you dont seem like you’re from here. Are you?” He asked as you shook your head. “No no im actually french” you said. “Wow that’s interesting, i can show you around baby girl” carlos said as he pointed at the main gate to signal you to leave with him and you just smiled.

The whole evening was fun with him, every little jokes he cracked made you laugh so hard. Teaching you a little bit of spanish in between your conversations with him. Everything just seemed great with him. But the “baby girl” nickname just stayed there. “Why do you keep calling me that? I have a name” you said as you laughed a little. “Because you are a baby girl. So beautiful and innocent for this world” he said as he got closer to you. His lips just a few inches away from yours as you started to feel the heat rush through your body. Somehow his presence was so powerful that you could just give yourself to him. You parted your lip a little as you tried to lean in but Carlos grabbed your face and snapped you back to reality. “Oh, you try to be so wild in front of me but inside you’re just a sweet little angel, so naive and sweet” he said as his thumb started to caress your lips as the need inside of you grew much more than before.

“Youre so innocent baby girl. Oh the things I would love to do to you, right now” he said that was just like a whisper in your ear. “Like what?” You asked as you looked up at him with doe eyes. “Oh you’ll know soon, you’ll know” he said as he came more closer, letting your heart beat faster than before. Your whole body stiffened as he felt him pull away and smirk just inches away from your lips, teasing you to the point where you couldn’t take it anymore as you let out a frustrated sigh. “Being frustrated wont help baby girl, come with me” he said as he turned around to look at you with a cocky smile on his face.

The fragrance his house had was so warm and welcoming as you sat on the couch and carlos brought a bottle of wine and placed it on the table. After a couple of drinks you started to feel carlos’ cologne more in your nose. You just wanted to wrap your hands around him. The tension grew stronger between you two.

Carlos then came closer to you as he placed his huge hands on your thigh chuckling at the sight that you are so small. "Fuck baby girl, you're really small for me. But dont worry im gonna make it fit in your hole. All your holes" he whispered in your ear as shiver ran down your spine and you rubbed your thighs together. "God, look at you. Already needy." he said as he looked down and looked back at you as he came closer to lips and brushed his lips with yours causing you to open your mouth a little but that didn’t help. You then whined and groaned as you looked at him with puppy eyes. “You really think youre gonna get what you want from me just by whining? Not at all angel. Use your pretty little mouth of yours” he said as his hand wrapped around your neck, choking it lightly first then tightening the grip as you gulped at the sight in front of you. He then pulled your t-shirt up and dropped it on the floor as he wrapped his hands around your waist to lift you up and position you properly on your back, as he groaned at the fact that his hands fit perfectly around your waist. “God, even your waist is smaller than my hands” he said as he trailed his finger down your lower abdomen as you started to squirm in his touch again.

He then tucked in your pants and you tried to push it down by grabbing his hand but he was strong enough to stay still and not push it down. “Use. Your. Words” he said, his tone so cold as you whined out. “I-i want you” you managed to say. “No its not good enough baby girl. Tell me properly” he said as he unzipped your pants slowly. “I want y-you to fuck me. P-please” you said whining as you ran your hands over his chest. “Yeah thats more like it” he said as he grabbed your hand and kissed it. He then pulled your pants down along with your underwear and did the same with himself.

Carlos brushed his tip at your entrance that made wet sounds from your pussy as a string of slick connected with his dick to your pussy as he groaned at the sight. “Fuck baby girl, your pussy is so small for me. Can you take it like a good little girl you are? Take it all for me?” He said as he caressed your face and you nodded impatiently. He then went inside of you slowly and stayed still for a moment until you started to rock your hips against him. At first his thrusts were slow and gentle but he went deep inside of you every time. “Fuck carlos, stop teasing me” you said as you bucked your hips up. “Beg for it baby girl” he said as he smirked at you. “F-fuck me harder daddy p-please!” You pleaded as he choked you again and kissed your ear before saying “daddy huh? youre that needy?” you just nodded as he went faster and you dig your nails in his forearms. “Fuck fuck f-fuuuck yes!” You screamed out.

Carlos then pulled your legs above his shoulder and kissed your ankles as he continued to fuck you. The heat between you two, the intensity, everything was just too much to handle. “You look like an angel baby girl” he said as he groaned. “My little angel” he threw his head back as his breathing got heavier. “Daddy i-im gonna c-cum so bad, fuck” you said as your back started to arch uncontrollably. “Me too baby girl, me too” he said breathlessly. You both got down from your high when carlos kissed you, so softly that it made you melt. His kiss was so sweet and gentle.

“Wanna watch the stars?” He asked out of nowhere as he kissed your forehead. “Yes” you said that was like a whisper. You both then went to the terrace as you snuggled in his arms and watched the stars. His finger twirling in your back as he rested his face on your head. “When are you gonna go back to France?” He asked softly, his voice sounded like he wanted you to stay there forever, with him. “Tomorrow evening” you said as you looked up at him and saw his face froze as he said nothing. You sat back up with a concerned look on your face. “I can come visit you again if you want carlos” you said as you cupped his face and his face started to fall. His eyes begging you to stay. “Or maybe I can go visit you” he said, his voice started to break a bit. You smiled and nodded. “Yeah exactly” you said. “Promise me you’ll come back again” carlos said as he came closer to you. You then hugged him tightly “i promise carlos” you reassured him as you felt tear in the corner of your eye.

A/N: requests are open! feel free to ask what you want me to write! luv you ❤️

#f1 smut #f1 #f1 x you #f1 x female reader #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 x y/n #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #carlos sainz x female reader #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz 55 #carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz fanfic #carlos sainz junior #carlos sainz smut #carlos sainz #cs55 x reader #cs55 #cs55 imagine #formula 1 #formula one #f1 2023 #forza ferrari #ferrari #scuderia ferrari #smut #carlos sainz jr

[mikalame]

Can she come, please

This is gonna be a bout little tom and TH going on their first tour and he's wanting you to come a long with the band ( young love relationship)

taglist: @oppopotamus @violentnewmarley @saumspam

"Please let her come sir i promise nothing bad will happen to her, please..." Tom childish voice bounces of the wall in the living room. His pleading feel on the deaf ears of his girlfriends dad.

It was currently 11:30 pm at night the tour bus was leaving in an hour Tom was already running late. He just wanted his lovely girlfriend to come along on on their first tour what was so bad about it.

"Boy, do you know how stupid you sound right now, do you really think that i would let my little girl go in a bus with people i dont know-" "but you know me! " Tom argues back

"Dont interrupt me, i may know you but i don't trust you little boy" The older man snaps at the young boy "____ calm down let Tom speak" ___ mum asks with a hushed voice the only person that on his side with letting her come along

"Please sir, this is a very big achievement and shes been there since the beginning pleas-" "dad whats going on, why are you yelling" a girls voice echos through the halls before a body pops out from the hallway.

Looking in the girl is very confused seeing her dad angry looking at her boyfriend and her mother trying to calm down her dad. "Go back to bed ___ this has nothing to do with you" The man says not using the same tone of voice as a couple seconds ago "well if my boyfriends involved i think i does, hi Tom" The girl says kissing the boys cheek before sitting down.

"Wait aren't you supposed to be on tour right now" The girl questions "yes i am, and i was asking your dad if you could come along but he's not agreeing" Tom says frustrated rubbing his hand over his face "Oh you little-" "okay, you two go up to ___ room ill be there in a second i need to talk to your dad first" ___ mother says calm and collected, very over this discussion.

Before her dad could argue against it they bolt down the hall and close the door shut. They talk for a while saying things about how they would text and call whenever they can before Tom had a great idea.

"Why dont you just run away and come we could leave right now" Tom says chipper thinking is was one of the best ideas in the world "No Tom, thats a stupid idea my dad will kill you and then me for even going along with that plan" ___ whines back.

"My dad already doesn't like you why do you think that wold be a good idea" ___ pleads not wanting her boyfriend to not get even more hate then he already gets from her dad.

Just then her dad opens the door, Tom stands up ready to defend himself again. "Sit down down Tom, i dont trust, like or even want you in my house right now, ...but my daughter seems to really like you a lot so i suppose you can go" The kids start cheering only for it to be cut off "BUT, i need you to answer my questions okay" The boy nods dreads to short to tie up yet bouncing with his head.

"Will there be adult supervision?" the man questions "yes every bosy but from us will be adults" the boy very happy that she is able to come along.

"No alcohol, drugs or anything of the sorts on the bus" The man says eyebrow lifting, eyes squiting looking for any detail that could say that the boy was lying to him. "Nope sir, the only people what would have alcohol would be the adults, they wont give anything to us dont worry" they young boy adds trying to better his chances at getting her dad to like him.

The older man huffs "fine but i want you to know Tom im not fully agreeing to this, ___ mum is the only reason why ___ coming with you dont think i like you right now" "i understand sir" Tom nods

"___ pack your things you need to leave in like an hour, hurry up" the man says nonchalantly over his shoulder.

Time skip

"Thank you so much mum and dad i love you see you in a couple weeks" The young girls says the excitement bubbling in her voice " Thank you ma'am and sir promise shes in good hands" The boy says "yeah she better be" the man huffs "you two be safe and careful, wish you good luck to you and your band Tom" ___ mother says with a warm smile on her face " Thank you, hope we do good aswell" the pair wave as they close the door behind them.

"He called me Tom not boy, Ahhh i think im warming up to him" the girl giggles at what the young boy says walking to the tour bus hand in hand.

Hope yall like, sorry i havent done TH in a while most of my request are Manzini its a bit hard to write for him tho but i try my best

#tokio hotel #tom kaulitz #bill kaulitz #georg listing #gustav schäfer #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz imagines #tom kaulitz x you #tom kaulitz smut

[canthavetoomuchchaos]

Not a bad kid

ANGST ANGST ANGST

Set in teenage years.

Darlin + David

I strongly follow the "Darlin and David are siblings" thingy. This is set when both are around 14 ish.

Tw/Cw: mentions of abuse, fear, injuries, brief mentions of dying,

David and Gabe are sleeping, that is until they both hear frantic knocking at the front door.

David is sound asleep, snoozing away under his blanket, his dad in the next room over doing the same. Both are awoken by fast, frantic, and harsh knocking on their front door. David sits up blearily and walks to his door, waiting for his dad to pass him so he can follow.

"David, don't come down until I know who it is alright?" David nods and waits. Gabe opens the door and immediately a person is falling into him. He grips their shoulders, eyes wide as they are frantically begging for his help. Gabe is quick to shut the door.

"David- come down here, get the first aid kit under the kitchen sink, quickly." He's calm, carefully carrying his young pack member to their living room, setting them gently on the couch, ignoring the thought that their blood and the mud is ruining it. They're still crying, clinging to his shoulders, but they're frantically muttering now. The same thing, over and over and over again.

"I'm sorry- 's not my fault- didn't study hard enough- please, please I didn't mean to." Gabe is mortified. They're like this because of a bad grade on something? Or is he hearing wrong? David returns with the first aid kit.

"David, come sit by their head, keep them awake if they start to fall asleep. They may be concussed." David does as his father requested him and sits by their head. Gabe, very gently, starts to peel away their drenched shirt, pulling it up to get a view of their abdomen. Cuts, bruises and scratches, along with long healed scars are all over their skin. He presses into the biggest wound on their side, steadily oozing blood. He barely hears David gag. As he presses against them they let aout a very sharp yelp, he can hear their wolf slightly come through it. He looks up about to apologize, but they look horrified that they even made the sound in the first place.

"'m sorry- I didn't mean to- I was just- please don't hurt me. I didn't mean to growl-" David takes the liberty of trying to soothe them, doing what his dad does to him when he's sick, running his hands along their scalp. They freeze but withing seconds they are leaning into his gentle hand. Gabe continues his work on their wounds.

About fifteen minutes later Gabe is almost finished when David tenses from his quiet, almost one-sided conversation.

"...Dad...Dad you gotta hear this." His face is sombre for a fourteen year old. Gabe frowns and leans towards them.

"can you say that one more time? You mum ked a little there. " David asks them quietly. They frown and speak, this time slightly louder than before, attempting to help him understand.

"...got a c- on a math test. My parents were.....not pleased to say the least. That's why I'm like this. My....dad...chased me here. I don't know if he's still here or not, I don't think he'll try to come inside though.." they're breathy, and tired, but they enunciate perfectly.

Gabe freezes, his mind reeling, their dad did this to them? This child is beaten bruised and bloody because they got one bad grade? For the first time ever in the history of the Shaw wolf pack, there will now be a banishing of a wolf. This child will stay, they aren't safe at home. This actually helps explain a lot of their behaviors, constantly being quiet, keeping away from the other kids, flinching if Asher is just a little too loud. It all makes sense.

"Kid, I know you live with your dad, is there anyone else there besides you and him?" He's cautious, voice a low, gentle timbre. They shake their head.

"just my stepmom, she eggs him on, doesn't help. wont miss me if I die right here, she hates me anyway" Gabe fails to hide his frustrated expression, glad their stable and their eyes are closed as they relax and relish in the safety of his house.

"I'm glad you came to me, kid. You won't have to go back there ever again. I swear on it." His face is set in a tense but gentle expression. He turns to David.

"take them to the guest bedroom, give them some clothes, they may not fit but work with what you've got please. " David nods and gently helps the young wolf. They both pause as Gabe speaks

"your tough kid. Like a tank, stay that way." They nod and continue their way upstairs with David's assistance.

While they are upstairs Gabe grabs his phone and calls his beta (I can't remember Ashers dad's name if it was ever mentioned so here's a random one) Daniel. He picks up quickly and Gabe explains the situation, Daniel is quick to ask if Gabe needs his help. Gabe denies and asks him to please schedule a formal pack meeting for tomorrow afternoon, all wolves required to attend. There's a small yell from upstairs and he's quickly hanging up.

"David? Everything alright up there?" He's on the bottom steps, carefully making his way up. David pops his head out, a small grimacing smile on his face.

"they shifted, their injuries don't seem to have transferred as harshly but they jumped on the bed and I think it hurt a little. They're fine though. I think." Gabe nods and ruffles David's hair.

"let them rest, you can go to sleep, I'm gonna stay in here with them, the door will stay open all night if you need anything." David nods, a small confused frown on his lips.

"why're you staying with them? They'll be sleeping." Gabe smiles at his young son's confusion.

"because if they have a nightmare or wake up randomly, I want them to know where they are and that they're safe. Now go to sleep." David nods and gives his dad a brief hug, leaving to his own room down the hall.

The next morning Gabe is making breakfast as Tank as he has decided to call them, stumbles into the kitchen. They freeze as they realize he's also in the kitchen. Their eyes widen as their bleary, sleep ridden eyes don't comprehend that they're not home.

"I'm sorry, I woke up late, I'll have breakfast done really quick I promise. You don't have to-" they are cut off by Gabe gently laying a hand on their shoulder.

"hey, it's okay, you're not at home anymore kid. You don't have to do anything right now. Go sit on the couch, watch some TV." They hesitate but listen nonetheless. Gabe sighs and continues to make food, not surprised in the slightest that his son is sleeping in.

Later, as Gabe is getting ready for the pack meeting, both kids come up to him, curious. David is the first to speak up as Tank catches their breath, side sore from their wound.

"where are you going dad?" Gabe looks up from his combat boots, his face set. He's mentally preparing for the meeting.

"Got a meeting, scheduled it last night." The kids frown, confused. David, again, speaks up first.

"..can we go?" Gabe hesitates and looks to Tank.

"...will you be okay? You'll stay by me the whole time." They think for a moment, then nod. They haven't spoken since that morning.

"alright, get your shoes on. Let's go." Both kids scramble for their shoes, trying to get them on as fast as possible.

As they arrive to the Den, Gabe reminds both kids to stay close, this is a serious meeting and there wasn't supposed to be kids in the first place. As they walk in, Tank's parents both rush up, fake relief written across both of their faces. Gabe pushes Tank behind him, standing tall. A harsh glare pointed at them. He makes sure that his eyes say all that need to be said. 'you will not touch this child ever again.'

Gabe guides Tank and David to the front of the room. Reminding David to keep a gentle grip on Tank, as their still slightly hurt. He walks up to his podium, clearing his throat and waiting for silence. As the silence falls his eyes land on Tank's dad, specifically his hands, bruised knuckles, cuts here and there along his arms, and a very painful looking wolf bite on his bicep. Tank sure gave a fight before running. He took a breath and started to speak.

"I'm sorry for calling this meeting on such short notice, but it has come to my attention, that some pack members do not seem to grasp what parenting is meant to look like. [Tank's parents] I have the unfortunate duty of dishonorably banishing you from my pack and any Shaw land or property. I want to make this clear to everyone in this pack, I will tolerate a lot. I will never tolerate abuse of any kind." He turns to Tank and beckons them forward, they stand, walking slowly toward him, their face still badly bruised and the cuts now scabbed.

"this is Tank. Your child. You will no longer be allowed near them, nor will you have custody of them. I will take them as my own. You are never to return here, and if I hear that you have, you will be reported to the department. Thank you, goodbye." He dismissed their parents. The two hesitates, then Tank's father lunged, yelling harsh words and horrible names at them. Gabe shifts, a giant wolf now standing over the fallen child, as he snarls, his beta shifts as well, gently using his snout to push the children away, whilst keeping an eye on his Alpha in case he needs assistance. As the father backs down, backing away, he continues to yell things a child should never have directed at them.

Later when they get back to the Shaw house they are laying on the cold kitchen floor, the chill helping soothe the ache in their side. They have a content smile

Safe.

______

The end was a little rushed but oh well!! Hope you like it!!

#redacted audio #redacted asmr #david shaw #redacted david #requests open #redacted darlin #redacted gabe #angst #tw #i don't know how to tag

[f4y3w00d5]

Vent post

About my mother mainly, but what did you expect, honestly? Its nearly always her.

So i was out at a sleepover last night and coincidentally didnt get much sleep. When i dont get much sleep im irritable and mum yells about that. On top of this, i had ideas for my story, so i went and wrote that for a bit. Mum went out so i stopped to look after Rose. Then i had a nap. She said i had been online 'all day'. 2 hours is nowhere near all day. Then she proceeds to scream at me for not spending time with her when we both fucking know thatd end with me being irritable and her yelling at me more. Then she proceeds to try and guilt me into spending more time with her. Like what the fuck, woman??? Thats emotional manipulation, and a form of psychological abuse!!! Anyways, i was forced off the laptop. And then right after yelling at me she was all like 'why dont you come out here with us?' and its like because im overstimulated and itll end with more yelling??? And shes about to go out anyway. Then she yelled more anyway!!! Said Dad would be home soon and id spend time with him - i wouldnt have said anything more than i said to her (basically what we did at the sleepover) - and its like what???

Anyways, because i was severely overstimulated and close to tears and shed taken away my coping mechanism (writing my story or my plant shit, both on the laptop) i asked to do the other thing i do to calm down, cheer up (go for a walk) and she was like 'no!!! Im about to go out!!!' and me being sleep deprived and overstimulated had forgotten that. Anyways i retreat back to my room and she follows me to be like 'Oh and when youre not spending enough time with us you want to go out?!? Spend LESS time with us?' and its like 'YEAH YOURE YELLING AT ME AND OVERSTIMULATING ME AND WONT LET ME CLOSE MY DOOR WHEN ITS LOUD WHICH MAKES IT WORSE' except of course i didnt say that cos she woulda screamed at me more and then she got angry at me for going on top of my bed which is my safe space and im nearly fucking crying becayse ITS NOT MY FUCKING FAULT I CANT COPE WITH THIS SHIT!!! SHE SAYS SHE UNDERSTANDS BUT SHE DOESNT!!!

And then fucking on top of this ive already had such an emotional day!!! Its so draining!!! Friends nearly dying and then i started falling into a panic attack and spiralling and all the stuff where i barely eat and oh fucking gods im a failure arent i?

#vent tw #once more i hate my mother

[candy8448]

My family wants me to shave

Its sounds so stupid to get upset about but for the past however long, my mum and sister have been pressuring me to shave my arms, legs and facial hair but i always manage to ignore them but then today they all just kinda said it, my dad included and like

I dont want to.

Its the way that i feel comfortable. I want to tell them that, to tell them that if they dont feel comfortable with how i look then that is their problem to deal with and that if girls aren't supposed to have any body hair then why do we grow it but i cant bring myself to.

Ive looked at my leg hair a lot and thought about how ugly i look only because of what they say.

Today my friend (who also has hairy arms and legs) wrote on my arm and i felt sick because of how i thought she would think about it because of how they make me feel about it

I love my body hair, it feels nice, i feel confortable, its soft, it makes my olive skin look fuller, i like it

At school its fine, with my friends im super comfortable, but at home i feel the need to hide my legs as much as they can so they wont see it and tell me to shave again and again and again and again and

Its really frustrating

Right now i tried trimming it with scissors as maybe a compromise but i did a bit and i feel so sad and i hate it so much.

Its sounds so silly but bro, i just want to have what makes me comfortable but they constantly make me feel disgusting because of it

(And i bet if my brother ever wanted to shave his legs, they wouldn't let him)

I want to maybe shave my legs for prom (only my legs and maybe face, not my arms) but i only want to for the day, i dont want to spend the however much long waiting for it to grow back. And i feel like if i shave, they will just make a ton of comments about how pretty i look now and then when i start to let it grow again, they will go back to pressuring me again but harder.

#i do a little ramble #vent #bigender #bigenderfluid #genderfluid #genderflux #bigenderflux #gnc #gender nonconforming #genderqueer #gender expression #lgbt #lgbt+ #trans #transgender #transmasc #transmasculine #transblr #nonbinary

[iamunabletothinkofablogname]

Hey what's going on friend?

You want to talk about it?

/nf /genq

i keep getting bullied but today was especially bad it is a long story, but if your okay with listening, also eitherway thank you

first these dudes in my class kept making weird comments ['do you want to [-] me', 'does she know how to talk? Do i have to sign to you?', and meowing and making yippee noises at me] and similar shit,then the girl behind me kept kicking my chair and tugging at my keychain [alastor] even after i told her to stop and so i couldn't focus on anything, the teacher moved me from my spot [i dont have any friends at the school so i wasnt talking to anyone, but she was changing up the seating plan which was kind of annoying since my brain is so used to going and sitting on that exact spot and so my brain had to load it but i could deal with that honestly, its just the combination of this and other shit]. I kept hearing my name whispered around but i didnt know why or what since i have shitty hearing so it didnt hurt as much but still wasnt exactly fun Then when i went to the bathroom girls were kicking and punching at the door to get it to open and i had to just sit there silently until they went away, and when they went away they closed the lights and closed both doors [the toilet has 2/3 mini hallways since its the 'fancy' one], and so i had to spend most of break feeling around the walls to get out and find the light because it was one of my first times using the upstairs one. and of course this triggered a fucking panick attack because why wouldnt it and of course instead of being maybe a tad empathetic, they started laughing [maybe because of how i looked? idfk]. and then we went to the assembally [assembelly?] for some random ass speech by the principal which i couldnt hear because, again, people were tugging at my bag and after i pushed a girls hand away she started insulting me and my looks/personality and started fucking meowing at me, which her and her friends found 'hillarious' and then the bell rang and so i had to just ignore that and go to the pickup area, when i was there there were already some students talking to my youngest sister and insulting her bcus they knew she was my sister and she started crying which hurt more because she's 7 and she had no beef with them other than being my sister :I this all happened today and i had to just pretend nothing happened at home because my mum wont do anything and she certainly wont let me go back to my old school and sorry if this is a bit a lot /gen i am very overwhelmed right now

#ask #thank you and sorry #the-alakazam-attraction #by the way i can talk #and im not nonverbal #but at school im lowk mute and i dont fake facial expressions for random people #eitherway i havent told anyone at my school that im autistic and im not a furry?? [no hate btw i think they're neat] #<-do they think alastor is a furry????????????? #i doodle elfs so maybe they think the long ears are cat ears???? #im just trying to find reasons but i might be stupid #also this took a lil long to respond cause had to eat and i typed too much

[yourtouchismidas]

Blurb idea

Matty and rg taking Gigi to get her ears pierced because she’s been begging them for ages and mattys all protective dad and doesn’t want her to have them done

i love this. i think matty makes gigi wait until she is eight years old. then, the day after her eighth birthday, she wakes you guys up and simply says "you promised." and you did. so it's off to town you go to get her ears pierced.

gigi skips ahead of you guys into town, holding shay's hand and whispering that maybe if mum and dad see how easy it is and how cool she will definitely be about then maybe they will drop the wait til youre eight rule for shay and let her get them done earlier.

so they go into claires in the mall and you ask for an ear piecing for your daughter, and matty hangs behind quietly with shay in his arms until they lead gigi over to the seat and he starts asking "so you sanitize the needle right? like it's clean" and "like do most kids cry when they get it done? how much does it hurt them?" and "you wont make her bleed will you? like you'll be careful?" and you're rolling your eyes at the woman who is just saying "yes sir," and "it will sting a little but then it's over," and gigi gets in the chair all confident and chooses her earrings, little gold studs, and then they put the gun to her ear and matty says "gi hold my hand" and she is like "dad i'm fine" but he says "it's not for you, hold my hand" and so she does and squeezes it tight for him.

when the first piercing goes in there is a moment of silence when gigi goes white but her ear goes bright red and matty squeaks, and gigi, trying to be brave, blinks back tears and says "ow" and matty says "you okay? baby you okay?" and the panic in his voice makes gigi cry even though she is saying "i'm fine," through her tears.

"matty, get out," you say.

"what?"

"take shay and go get a pretzel," you say, taking gigis hand "you're stressing her out."

"i'm not stressing her out, i'm taking it seriously."

"it's an ear piercing matthew, you literally have them yourself."

"yes but this is my baby's skin. her tiny ears. its a million times more precious than mine."

"exactly why you cant be here. go. pretzel."

you shove him gently on the chest and he goes, huffing.

"ready?" you ask gigi, and she sniffs and nods and rolls her eyes and says "sorry about my dad," to the woman, "he's just obsessed with me."

you leave claires, gigi skipping ahead of you, looking at her freshly pierced ears any reflection and grinning. matty is leaning up against the wall outside, shay at his ankles, both covered in cinnamon sugar dust.

"let me see, beautiful" he says, and holds gigi's face with both his big hands and says "wow! so pretty"

"right?" gigi says and then starts whining for a pretzel because shay got one and shay is whining because gigi got her ears pierced and she didnt and matty picks up his youngest again and grabs gigi in a tight tight hug and says "i love you so much baby, i love you."

gigi squirms and wriggles out saying "dad you're so weird," and he straightens up and smiles because he knows that she knows she is the most loved kid on the entire planet, only matched by her little sister who he holds close now before she gets to the age she starts calling him weird too.

#ruins #ruins behind the scenes #matty healy x reader #matty healy x you #matty healy #matty healy x y/n #the 1975 fanfic #matty healy fanfiction #dad!matty

[rocketturtle4]

Why Kawi Felt Inentionally Ace Coded

This is the second post I am making about this show for this week, the first was about what I think went down around time travel in this ep and I will directly reference those theories.

Also I just think the way this episode was playing with flash forwards and backs (with both Piseang’s conversation with his mum AND Max’s convo with Kawi – ALSO A FLASHBACK FYI) is VERY INTENTIONAL. (for the purpose of keeping us both in and out of the loop)

Okay so, for the record I really didn’t plan to actively engage in BMF this week, I am mid spiral on an entirely different TV show and this show did not have my full focus while I watched it this morning.

HOWEVER

This moment

[Image ID: Kawi saying "Do you think it's possible for two people dating to have no sexual activity at all]

Took my attention and kept it, I was yelling and I made 2 quick reaction posts about the fact that I was yelling (1, 2)

I will add here that @dropthedemiurge posted about Kawi being definitely ace coded LAST WEEK (I couldn't find it sorry but I remember reading it) as well as this week 2 and @heretherebedork had two different posts about this this week.

Also there is legit evidence for this being about touch starvation and intimacy issues (@shouldiusemyname) and if they do this well I wont be mad but…

It Felt VERY ACE CODED To me

And it felt a bit smack in your face ace coded in a way that to me was throwing up giant WE ARE GOING THERE flags. These flags, to me, were primarily in the LANGUAGE that was used more than Kawi’s physical body langue (which was more ambiguous between the two theories), and this is even trickier because of the layers of translation involved.

So lets talk about those flags

(Also I’m demisexual and demiromantic so my own lens is definitely colouring my view)

Max’s convo with Kawi

I actually loved this convo FOR Max’s response, not because he responded well (if Kawi is ace) but because he DIDN’T respond well. This show is doing a really good job of allowing it’s characters to be flawed and I reckon both Max and Piseang got to be flawed in this episode.

Max has been our gay Yoda

Max has been on point with all his advice

Kawi and Piseang are together in part due to Max’s advice,

But do you know what else Max is?

A 20 YEAR OLD

Max isn’t the person Kawi needs to talk to in this moment, because Kawi’s experiences are no longer aligning with his, and all of his advice thus far has been based on HIS OWN EXPERIENCE (which he literally says by the way):

[Image ID: Max speaking while the subtitles translate the start of his sentence as "Personally,"]

Kawi’s language in this convo was REAL SUS

On top of the first line pictured above, their conversation includes

Max: You’ve already crossed the line, what are you afraid of?

Kawi responds

[Image ID: Kawi saying "I'm not afraid. I just don't think it's that significant."]

Then we get Maxs scoff (SCOFF!!): "Right, The word from someone who’s never had sex"

And his positive take on how important sex is for a relationship and an Individual

And the implication that doing it with someone you love is even better

Then

Max: Are you going to sleep next to each other holding hands forever?

[Image ID: Kawi saying "That's good." with an acesexual black, grey, white and purple flag added to the image]

@sparklyeyedhimbo I like the flag one so I borrowed it.

Then Max points out that it will only work out if Piseang feels the same way.

my thoughts:

Max is very dismissive of Kawi in this convo, there is a real disconnect with Kawi’s tentative questions and Max’s certain responses. Again I THINK THIS IS INTENTIONAL as per above. (For anyone who wants to check again its part 3/4 from around the 2 minute mark)

Kawi doesn’t seem afraid, he seems genuinely confused about not wanting sex. And personally, I’ve BEEN THERE.

Back in the bedroom

Now here we get some fear as Kawi finds condoms, panics and pretends to sleep.

Something I find interesting about this is he doesn’t pretend to sleep facing away from where Piseang would lie or curled up, he is still placed fairly centrally on the bed. His body language isn’t overly defensive (in my uninformed opinion). Now this could just be that he trusts Piseang regardless but I wanted to point it out.

[Image ID: Piseang standing at the foot of the bed look at Kawi apparently asleep in bed]

Then Piseang Time Travels (Full clown, I’m committed)

(I just watched the scene again and Kawi opens his eyes and we don’t see Piseang while the music plays, this scene is legit from Kawi’s point of view and we’ve already seen that the travel isn’t visible to the person not holding the magic globe so I AM EVEN MORE CERTAIN)

Anyway back to this post

Piseang goes to bed and looks at kawi like this

[Image ID: Piseang staring at Kawi]

(I’m just putting this here and choosing to interpret it as weighted with future knowledge lol)

Which post is this again?

Ah yes Ace!Kawi

So we get bed in the morning and Kawi pretending to sleep and then Piseang goes

[Image ID: Piseang rolls to lie on top of Kawi]

And Kawi informs him that he’s heavy.

There’s no recoil

There’s no fear

Until

[Image ID: Piseang says "Would you like to get on top instead then?"]

Even then he’s startled more than scared in my humble opinion

Until Piseang tries to kiss him

[Image ID: Kawi making a very surprised/scared face]

Then Kawi pushes him off and leaves

Piseang continues to try and encourage intimacy

HOLD ON I HAVE A SECOND CLOWN THEORY ABOUT THE FUTURE

(I’m less convinced about my projections for what happens in the future, Piseang looks so content, maybe he just get’s a glimpse of domestic bliss…It needs to be next week already. FOR THE RECORD I’m sticking with clown theory 1 if I have to choose).

We get this moment

[Image ID: Two images of Kawi as Piseang wipes something off the corner of his mouth and Kawi's expression goes from anger to something softer]

And Kawi’s change of experession here is so tender, I feel like this could be coded either way intimacy issues or strong romantic feelings, it’s not lust though that’s for sure. (I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be using coded for intamacy but *shrugs*)

(oooo I wonder if the language play came from his glimpse into the future)

I’m going to skip ahead to the theme park or this will go forever

The bits in between feel more ambiguous to me

THESE LINES FELT SUPER ACE CODED

[Image ID: Piseang saying "If you just wanted to eat, why did you ask me to take you to a theme park? then Kawi saying "I just wanted to get the vibes. The thing that can make me the happiest is eating"]

Food over sex is a legit part of the ace community (the same way tucked in shirts and clear phone cases are part of the bi community from what I understand)

[Image ID: Kawi still saying "The thing that can make me the happiest is eating" now holding up a corn cob]

(If Kawi had held up cake here I would be ALL IN)

Then we get the rollercoaster metaphor!

[Image ID: Kawi and Piseang both looking at the rollercoarster, Piseang looks excited Kawi looks concerned/apprehensive/is making a woah face]

I’m just going to transcribe here it’s quicker and I’m running out of time before I go out tonight:

K: This is too much. Not this ride

P: Come on, Let’s try it first

K: No, I don’t like it.

P: You haven’t tried it yet. How do you know if you like It or not. You said you’d never been to a theme park.

P: If you don’t try it, it’s the same as if you’ve never been here

e.g. Coming to a theme park isn’t the same as enjoying the ride

Then P holds out his hand

P: If you’re scared, just hold onto my hand, Okay?

[Image ID: Kawi looking at Piseang]

K looks at Piseangs hand, Looks at Piseang, Looks at the ride and says

K: No! I won’t get on it. You can go alone if you want to. I’ll just wait here

And walks off

[Image ID: Piseang looks disapointed]

This again felt to me like a rejection of the fear as the primary motivation, he directly says he’s not afraid but he still doesn’t want to

I’m not sure about this scene in the car, it mostly just felt like Kawi was fed up at this point.

[Image ID: Kawi and Piseang in the car]

Possibly this scene highlights the different places there in and how Piseang is open to new experience and Kawi’s not? This feels more intimacy coded than ace.

Restaurant Scene

[Image ID: Kawi and Piseang looking tired in the restaurant]

Both Kawi and Piseang look so worn out in this scene, they both spent the whole day not communicating their true wants and fears and it’s left them all worn down

But Piseang doesn’t give up

[Image ID: Piseang saying "Whatever I did wrong today, you can tell me." and Kawi responding "Today was great."]

Kawi responds to this sincerity and reaches out to hold Piseang’s hand.

KAWI is the one WHO REACHES OUT, again this reads as specifically felt to me as a reason against touch starved.

[Image ID: Two images of Piseang and Kawi holding hands in the restaurant]

And then we’re in the bedroom (time skip anyone).

I’m actually not going to analyse this scene at all much. If Kawi is ace then he can still choose to have sex provided he and Piseang have communicated and if it’s intimacy issues then I also think it’s okay provided they’ve communicated first. ( idon't actually currently think Kawi is demi for the record)

(even when Piseang takes his shirt off, Kawi’s eyes stay on Piseangs face)

(although Piseangs do too actually…)

[Image ID: Two images of Kawi and Piseang after they have removed their shirts staring at each other. The first image contains the subtitle of Piseang saying "are you sure?"

(god his eyes are so big here compared to their often squintiness)

He doesn’t pull back but leans into the kiss. He’s clearly sure of his decision. I’m just not sure about his reasons.

[Image ID: Piseang and Kawi kissing]

Both Piseangs hands are on Kawi, but Kawi’s hands are straight down, I think this could go with either theory but personally on the few occasions I’ve made out with someone “what do I do with my hands?” loops in my head lol so I found this relatable.

Make of this what you will!!

Thoughts on Kawi and Kissing Piseang while he’s drunk

Honestly this doesn't feel weird to me, romantic attraction can involve kissing and drunk!kawi is just giving in to his confused thoughts and feelings, Aesthetic attraction can trick you too if you're not aware of your own identity (lol I had sex with someone before I experienced sexual attraction for the first time and felt very confused about why I didn't really feel like doing it again after even though it had been a positive experience, It was WILD), Kawi kisses Piseang because he likes him and is then confused about Why TF it doesn't feel like it's "supposed" to, *shrugs* make of that what you will.

Additional Thoughts

I’m reading into past future events now but I wonder about Pear and Kawi’s relationship.

Did they have sex?

There was clearly something fundamentally wrong with it, and the show talks about Kawi prioritising work, but it’s all a bit ambiguous and we never got any impression of intimacy. The fact that Pear is pregnant and Kawi doesn’t question if he’s the father, how long have they been broken up? Why did Pear seek out Not in the first place? Did Pear assume Kawi was gay because they didn't have sex??

ALSO

The scene where Kawi stares at Piseang while he was sleeping (Ep 9) I'm not going back to find it now or this won't get posted for like another 14 hours but it also felt ace-coded but I shrugged it off.

ALSO I HIT THE IMAGE LIMIT LOL

(@lurkingshan and @clairificusrex since you helped with my thoughts)

#be my favorite #be my favorite the series #be my favorite meta #ace-coding in be my favorite #rturts is wondering #long post