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borhap-au · 3 years

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A hidden motif.

“Kick harder!” he screamed, snapping me out of my thoughts. I immediately began to push myself further, even though I was already exhausted from the hour-long training. Billy didn’t treat me leniently at all. He demanded a lot from me, honestly, I often felt like I was the only one who was pushed to the limits by him. The rest had it much easier with Billy. Now he held the punching bag, as I was repeatedly kicking it.

“They won’t go easy on you! When you fight, you fight for your life! They won’t care that you’re tired!” he continued, and I stopped myself from kicking him “by accident,” and just continued to kick the bag. I knew where he was coming from and he was right. My exhaustion wouldn’t matter on a mission, nobody would ask me how I felt and if I still had the strength to fight back. They would simply kill me, or imprison me, and since we’re talking about terrorists, I wasn’t sure which option would be worse. But today I had enough. I really only wanted to lay down in bed, in full clothing, and fall asleep. Nothing mattered, not even my empty stomach. I just wanted to close my eyes and drift off, but Billy continued to push.

“You wouldn’t knock a ninety year old grandma over with that kick!” he attacked my technique and honestly, at this point I had enough of him and his denouncing language. Whatever I did was wrong in his view, he never felt satisfied with me and what I was doing. So I stopped kicking, threw the boxing gloves on the mat and just exhaled loudly.

“And I wouldn’t want to! What a monster would want to hurt a grandma? Probably the same who wouldn’t give a girl who barely has the strength to stand on her feet a fucking break!” I shouted in his face and turned around. He quickly grabbed me by my wrist to stop me.

“Leave me alone,” I continued, but this time I wasn’t screaming. I was exhausted and the tone of my voice confirmed it. I felt resigned, mad, and disappointed in myself. I couldn’t understand why I could never, no matter what, meet his standards and expectations.

“I want to go drink some water,” I said and turned my head to look him in the eyes. His face was dangerously close to mine as he looked at me with a firm look on his face. He wanted to say something, probably tell me that the training session isn’t over until he says it’s over, but I didn’t allow him to speak. I didn’t feel like long speeches, I didn’t want to explain myself to him. My message was clear, short and quick.

“Go fuck yourself, Billy,” I said and took my hand away. He wasn’t holding me firmly, he wasn’t trying to hurt me, just wanted to stop me so that he could express his views to my face instead of my back, however, I didn’t allow for it. Not anymore, not today. Today was over, as far as I was concerned, and only my opinion mattered to me.

Billy was so surprised by what he’s heard, he didn’t even answer. I went across the room to the table and took one of the water bottles, then gulped down half of it. He looked at me without saying a word for a solid second.

“Alright, you had your drink, and you’ve thrown your tantrum, now we can get back to the training,” he insisted, but I only smiled ironically, took my things and left the room.

“Goodnight, Billy,” I said on my way out and didn’t stop to listen to what he wanted to say to me. As I promised my body, I went straight to bed, only gathering the little energy I had left to take my clothes off, so I didn’t sleep in my own sweat. I slept for a solid 12 hours after that. I had to get all of my strength back and frankly, sleeping helped a lot. However, I still felt sore, my whole body was screaming for a pill to ease the pain. I barely managed to finish taking a shower. I ate a big breakfast and grabbed a soda. I got out in front of my trailer, sat on an old couch, and just rested.

Meanwhile Billy was confronted by the rest of the team over his harsh methods. They saw me yesterday coming back to the trailer, but none of them dared to disturb me. They knew it wasn’t the first time Billy pushed me to check the limits. This time even he knew he went too far. So he came to me, asked if he could sat down on the couch, and when I refused, still mad from yesterday, he simply sat on the ground in front of me. The view was quite endearing.

“Listen… I wanted to apologize. I know I went too far yesterday… and on a few other occasions. I didn’t mean for you to suffer, I just wanted to make 100% sure that if there’s a need, you will be able to protect yourself. I didn’t want you to ever find yourself in a situation where the opponent is stronger and has more resilience than you,” his voice was surprisingly soft. He sounded sincere.

“I’m already capable of protecting myself well enough. Thank you very much,” I said ironically and still a little mad from yesterday. Every inch of my body reminded me of how he treated me.

“No, you don’t understand. I NEED you to be safe,” his words almost shocked me. I looked at him with disbelief. Did he really mean it, I wondered.

“Why would you want that so badly? You don’t seem to treat any other member of the team so roughly,” I reminded him. I was salty about it and had a good reason for it.

“Because I don’t care for any other member of the team as much as I care about you,” he explained, but I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t say anything.

“Listen…” he continued. “I… really like you. And that one time, when that guy kicked you off the boat… I thought I lost you. I couldn’t bear the thought, so when you survived, I promised myself I’ll make sure you’ll never find yourself in a hopeless situation like that ever again. I can’t allow it, this job is too risky.” I was astonished. Deep down, I actually believed he hated me. He acted as if he did, that’s for sure. But he did it all because he liked me? Because he was afraid I’d die?

“I’d actually prefer if you didn’t fight at all,” he added. “I’d take all the punches for you if you let me.” At this point he sounded crazy. What happened to the Billy I knew? I sighed quietly and made him some space on the couch. He made sure his trousers are clean and sat down with me, thanking me for allowing him to do that.

“What do you want from me, Billy?” I asked, unsure. I wasn’t sure of anything anymore, it was as if everything I knew up until this point just disappeared.

“Just be safe, that’s all,” he answered simply. I looked at him for a while.

“You told me you really like me and you’d take the punches for me and you expect me to just return to everyday life after this?” I asked with a little disbelief, since it was simply impossible.

“Well…” he looked as if he wanted to say more, but he just added: “I don’t know.” It clearly wasn’t enough. I slowly put my head on his shoulder. I was still mad and I was definitely planning to have a long talk about his behavior towards me and how many things needed changing moving forward. However, right now I had no strength, and he apologized for what he did, so I gave him a pass for today. We sat like that for a little longer, and neither of us said a word.

On the next training session, a few days later, when I already started feeling better, he was much more careful and lenient with me. He asked me how I felt several times and made sure I didn’t overwork myself. He gave me directions rather than orders and it really felt like I learnt much more from that approach.

Sometime later, I allowed him to ask me on a date. I never saw him so nervous and excited at the same time. We actually had surprisingly good time, so we had many more. He wasn’t rough or tough with me ever again. He explained in more detail how he only wanted me to be able to protect myself, and didn’t care if I hated him for it as long as I was safe. He was rather clumsy and awkward at times when it came to relationships, but it was rather sweet as well. So we continued dating, became official, and happened to be the best partners on the team, working together since that day on.

“Look out!” I screamed and Billy dodged a guy who I threw out of the boat to the water. He smiled and walked up to me, putting his arm around me.

“That was great. You look hot with all that power in your hands,” he commented with a smirk.

“You’re not going to tell me to go harder?” I asked and smirked as well.

“Not until we’re around other people, no,” he winked at me.

“You guys are disgusting,” we’ve heard One’s comment.

“Thank you,” I chuckled and Billy kissed my lips.

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borhap-au · 3 years

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can u write about stargazing with ben and teaching him about stars, and things like that?🥺 Like, the reader is Roger's daughter, and growing up she learned a lot of things about the universe with Brian

hey! thank you so much for the request, I posted it

I hope you’ll enjoy!

as always, so sorry that it took me so long, it’s just hard to fight the writer’s block these days :c

#ben hardy

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borhap-au · 3 years

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Stargazing with Ben.

“So what’s that one?” Ben pointed at the sky, showing you a random set of stars. It was well into the night, you were lying on a blanket, on a hill. You wanted to show him everything uncle Brian taught you about cosmos when you were a little girl.

“You’re looking at it all wrong,” you chuckled quietly, shaking your head. “Those are two different constellations. They’re called Ursa Major and Ursa Minor. Look, there is its head, and the rest is its body.” You got closer to him and pointed with your finger exactly where the stars were. He nodded his head, understanding more or less where they were located.

“What’s an Ursa?” he asked, looking at you. He smiled, but it was one of those smiles reserved only for people whose view makes one’s heart skip a beat. His eyes were full of love and devotion.

“It’s a Latin word for a bear. They’re basically two bears, a small one and a bigger one,” you explained and Ben looked at you shocked.

“Bears?” he asked, the way he’d normally say ‘are you joking?’ and looked at the sky once more, trying to figure it out. “They don’t have any legs!” You chuckled at his remark. He was in fact right, but it was still adorable how little he knew about the sky that he could observe every single night.

“You have to use a little imagination, Benny. They’re stars, not one of these connect the dots worksheets,” you got closer to him and rested your head on his chest. He put his arm around you and pet your back. “Plus, some people say those smaller stars can be viewed as the legs of Ursa Major. One way or another, you have to know they were named centuries ago. People used to draw a few lines on the walls of a cave and called it art. Things have changed,” you explained, moving your hand slowly on the side of his body.

“Alright, alright, I get it now,” he nodded his head. “But you have to admit, it takes a lot of faith and imagination to believe they are in fact two bears,” he chuckled and you agreed.

“Maybe it was easier for me to understand and accept it because I was a little girl then. Children have more imagination than adults, or at least they’re more skillful at using it. I just looked and believed.” You looked at his face smiling. He put his hand under his head to get it higher and see you better. Then he smiled as well.

“So Brian taught you, huh? I guess that’s like the best thing ever. Being taught about stars by an astrophysicist who’s also a rock legend,” he chuckled softly, and then he added, “second best, of course. After being taught by you.” He leaned towards you and kissed your forehead. You blushed a little and looked down, being surprised by such a sweet and unexpected compliment.

“Well, thank you, but trust me, he explained it much better. He’s the one that got me hooked on the topic. Did you know my old room had the Solar System stickers on the ceiling? They glowed in the dark. He bought me them,” you smiled under your breath remembering that. You didn’t know uncle Freddie personally and you didn’t remember uncle John. So Brian was the closest to your heart from the band, apart from your dad of course.

“That’s so cool. And now you can share your knowledge with an ignorant like me,” his smile uncovered a little embarrassment he must’ve felt because of it.

“Can you see that one? Those stars form sort of a snake, do you know which ones I mean?” You asked, trying to point him in the right direction.

“Yeah, yeah, I think I know what you mean,” he squinted his eyes, examining the sky.

“That’s called Draco. Do you know what Draco means?” You asked, kind of already expecting the answer.

“Of course I do. I grew up in the 1990s in England, everybody knows Harry Potter,” he smiled proudly. “By the end of the 90s I already knew how to read and it was my favorite book. Draco means a dragon. And these stars kinda look like one… Just slightly malnourished,” he joked and you chuckled with him.

“I just love how judgmental you are towards the people who named these constellations,” you chuckled some more.

“I can totally be judgmental, I know so much about the universe already,” it was obviously a joke, but on second thought, he was right.

“Much more than the people who named them, for sure. For example, what’s in the center of the Solar System?”

“The Sun. And the Earth circles around the Sun, not the other way around. I’m so knowledgeable I cannot deal with myself,” he laughed and then kissed your head.

“And what’s the name of the Polish astronomer who discovered that?” This question was met with silence, so you smiled under your breath and answered it yourself. “Nicolaus Copernicus. His work was titled ‘On the Revolutions of the Celestial Spheres.’ And you should at least know Galileo!”

“I do, I do! But I cannot sing that high, for the life of me,” his laugh once again filled up the quiet atmosphere.

“Well, can you at least sing that low?” You asked, and he, of course, had to try it. It was quite funny, hearing his attempt, but also quite cute. He tried so hard to impress you. “Very well. Almost like the original.” He smiled proudly when he heard that compliment and hugged you.

“Thank you,” he kissed your head again. Maybe he liked the smell of your shampoo.

“So, what’s our galaxy called? You know, the one Solar System is in,” you asked, not giving up on the plan to teach him about the universe. He hesitated, trying to remember.

“Bloody hell… I didn’t expect a test, I might’ve prepared better,” he smiled apologetically.

“There’s a chocolate bar named like that… It’s a very good one, and it looks completely different in the US and in the rest of the world. You probably know it in the blue version…,” you tried to direct him to the right answer.

“Milky Way! Man, I used to love them as a kid,” he smiled remembering. “I’d love to eat one now. Damn, the list is getting bigger and bigger,” he chuckled, and you looked at him curiously.

“The list? What list?” you asked him, looking him in the eyes, interested.

“Of things I dream of. Something I’d love to do, you know,” he shrugged, smiling. You raised your brow.

“So, what else do you dream of? Anything I could help with?” You asked him, smiling.

“Well… I always wanted to be kissed under the stars,” you smiled widely hearing that. “You know, I’m not very romantic, but that’s just something that seems like fun-“ he wasn’t able to finish, because before he did, you kissed him. He smiled kissing you back. Ben leaned in your direction and put his hand on your cheek. You prolonged the kiss as long as you could because secretly you dreamt of being kissed under the night sky too. Or just of being kissed by Ben. When you stopped kissing, he softly kissed your forehead.

“That was nice,” he said, smiling at you. You smiled back, as he brought you closer to himself. You rested your head on his chest. “We should do that more often,” he added.

“Yes, I also think you need many more lessons,” you smirked, looking at him.

“I meant the kissing,” he explained and winked to you.

“Oh, I know,” you muttered under your breath and looked at the sky again, being grateful for that one shooting star you made a wish to. It certainly came true that night.

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borhap-au · 3 years

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hi!! I just wanna say I love your blog it gives me life. I was wondering if you would do a rami x reader where you guys are starring in a new movie and he plays the (hot) villain and reader is the hero? thanks xoxo ;^)

Hey, thank you so much!

I posted your request, I hope you’ll like it!

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borhap-au · 3 years

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Your villain. Rami Malek au

You really tried to keep your cool, but the sexual tension between you two was undeniable. It was the scene where you stood in a room of an old castle, and he circled around you, saying his monologue. With every step, he got a bit closer and closer to you. You took a few deep breaths to contain yourself and not kiss him right there and then, in front of everyone.

You never saw a hotter villain. He was dressed in all black, his hair was styled in a fancy way and he had that smirk on his face that just screamed “trouble!” You, on the other hand, were dressed in a long green dress. Your hair was curly and loose, with a simple tiara keeping it all together. It was a fantasy movie, but that kind which was not suitable for young audiences. Rami’s character was ruthless and cruel, and your character had to do anything in her power to stop him. But in truth, if it was up to you, you would just stop him by keeping him in your bedroom, tied to your bed.

You both had supernatural powers. You were like light and darkness and because of him, you really wanted to join the dark side. You heard the word “cut!” and the main lights went back on. Everyone loosened up and Rami finally smiled his natural, heartwarming smile.

“I think it was quite good, don’t you think? It really worked this time.” He said, approaching you.

“Oh, yes, absolutely. I think it was our best shot so far. I totally felt it.” You agreed. He smiled, being proud of both of you.

“I hope the director will think the same.” He added, and you chuckled quietly.

“If not, tell him to discuss that matter with your Oscar.” You advised him, and he chuckled as well.

Thankfully, the director liked the scene as well, so after lunch, you could move on to a different sequence. This time it was after you both had been fighting with each other, and now you were on him, holding his hands down with all the supernatural energy power you had, disabling him from using his sword. You were both breathing heavily because the fight sequence was really difficult, it was almost like a very energetic dance routine. You held his hands down with all your strength, trying to make it look believable. You leaned over him and you were supposed to say your lines right to his face, but the longer you looked into his eyes, the further your lines escaped from your mind. You looked down at his mouth. He looked at your lips as well. None of the lines mattered to either of you anymore. You knew Rami thought the same, you felt it. You started lining forward…

“You’re going to like it in hell!” Someone shouted your line to you, to help you out. But at that moment, it was no help at all. It was a simple distraction. You moved your head back, suddenly very aware of yourself and your surroundings. And all the people around you. You felt stupid for doing that, so you asked for a little break, and the director granted it to you, but also warned you to better rehearse your lines. You nodded and went back to your trailer.

You closed your eyes and leaned on the wall. What were you even thinking? And around all those people… You sighed, mad at yourself for your lack of discretion, but you weren’t left alone with your thoughts for long. You heard knocking on your trailer door and rolled your eyes. Of course, somebody wanted something from you. You couldn’t have a minute of freedom in this damn-

“Oh, hey, Rami…” You gave him a fainted smile. He asked if he could come in. “Sure,” you opened the door wider so that he could get in. When he walked right next to you, your heartbeat started to rise. You closed to the door behind him.

“So, I was thinking whether you’d like to practice a few lines from that next scene,” he suggested, and you smiled apologetically in return.

“I’m sorry, I know I was completely rubbish out there, but I promise, I learned my lines. I just… They just… Poof,” you tried to explain, but he shook his head.

“I meant that I had trouble learning my own lines and I’d like to practice so that we don’t have to take another break and piss the director off,” he smiled and you chuckled quietly.

“Yeah, no problem,” you nodded your head and took your script to check your lines for the last time. After that, you began the scene. You pretended to fight, but in a very calm way, so more like showing each other what you would do rather than actually doing it. You didn’t want to break anything in the trailer and get tired during the break that was supposed to serve as a moment to take a breath.

“You’re going to like it in hell,” you said, and it sounded exactly like you wanted it to sound – as if you two were fighting for years and this time it finally came to an end. You sounded as if you were exhausted from trying to bring him to justice; as if that was the only thing you thought about since you started doing witchcraft and after today, you could finally rest. Even Rami was impressed with how you managed to squeeze so much meaning into a single sentence.

“I’m sure I will, after all, I’ve always liked a good company, and you, my dear, are certainly a company worth keeping,” he pretended to break free from you as well as put a knife through your heart and you, with your last breath cumulated all the power to destroy him. And in that last scene, you died, embraced, after years of fighting. You were finally free, not the way your character anticipated, but free nevertheless.

It was weird how easy everything was around Rami when it was just the two of you having fun. When there were no cameras and no eyes judging your every movement.

“Well, if we do it like this, on your next movie people will discuss their artistic differences with your Oscar,” he praised you, and you immediately blushed, because nobody’s compliments counted like his. Thankfully, due to your heavy make-up and bad lighting, he didn’t really see that.

“Thank you. It means a lot,” you admitted, and he smiled at you, at which you smiled back. He looked at your lips again and you involuntarily checked his. Your heart started racing. He leaned forward and… The break was over, as your director shouted through a megaphone.

“Oh, um… Thank you so much for your help with the lines,” you added before you both left your trailer.

“No problem. You were a huge help as well,” he smiled at you, and you loved his smile more every time you saw it.

You did the scene and you did it fantastically. You even got a standing ovation from the crowd around you. After that, you were almost done for the day, you just had to repeat one scene, because the director hoped for such intense emotions as he saw in this last scene. So you did the other scene one last time.

It was your first scene together in the movie, where you two meet for the first time after a long time. He’s heard stories about you being gone, killed fighting evil so he was sure he’s safe from you. You, on the other hand, heard only stories about his atrocities, but him being very much alive, so you decided to come and change that. He spoke your fictional name and you felt shivers going down your spine.

“What an unpleasant surprise,” his character admitted, and your character, technically still a newbie in her profession, held her breath, because for the first time in her life she had to face evil on her own. You looked him directly in the eyes, and he grabbed you by your shirt, initially to shout his character’s opinion of your character’s kind in your face, but this time, it was different and you were surprised with yourself that you didn’t notice it immediately while he planned it.

After he grabbed you by your shirt, for which you were prepared, because that was in the script, came something unexpected, but much more pleasant. He kissed you. Finally, after weeks of you praying for his lips to touch yours, it really happened. Despite none of it being in the script, the director didn’t stop you. He allowed for it, because everybody on set felt the sexual tension rising between the two of you and it was rather annoying, so everybody hoped you could resolve it somehow. The screenwriter considered even making changes to the script to make you lovers in the past, so you can have that kissing scene you two needed so much.

When his lips touched yours, you immediately kissed him back. You put your hands on his cheeks, bringing him closer and he put his hands around you and did the same. The world around you two didn’t matter, because it didn’t exist at that moment. You focused on the kiss and the amazing taste of his lips, how soft and sweet they were. It was passionate, and it finally let some of the tension between the two of you go away, leaving only a nice, warm feeling of happiness. When you unwillingly let go of each other, he smiled at you, petting your cheek with his thumb.

“Thank you, for being the best partner I ever had the pleasure to work with,” he said, and you replied with a smile.

“Thank you for making this movie the nicest adventure I’ve ever been on.”

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borhap-au · 3 years

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Joe x reader where she works on a film set and he likes her but she doesn’t think she deserves him because of her job but he reminds her that she is amazing and that he loves her and it’s fluffy and maybe a little angsty? (Write it in

Done! Hope you’ll enjoy it! ;)

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borhap-au · 3 years

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Joe Mazzello - the fluffy chronicles.

Only an assistant.

It was really weird for you, how often Joe came around you when you were on set. You were working together for a few weeks. He was the star of the movie, while you were an assistant of an assistant, with your basic work requirements being “Hey, Y/N, bring me…” So you could never understand why he would even want to hang out with someone like you, since you were sure that to him, you must be nobody.

“Hey, will you join us for lunch?” he smiled at you one day and you looked at him confused.

“Me? Why?” you were used to sitting away from people, all alone, until somebody asked you to do something.

“Well, because we would all appreciate your company,” you couldn’t help but notice how beautiful his smile was.

“We, meaning who exactly?” he mentioned a few names, most of them actors in this movie. “Why, so you can make fun of me?” he looked at you surprised, not believing what he’s just heard. “Cause that’s why you’re doing it, right? You have like a bet, who brings the biggest loser to the table? Why did you single me out? I was always nice to you, was that not enough?” He looked at you almost in shock.

“You really think I would ask you to sit with us to make fun of you? No, I wanted you to join us, maybe meet some new people. I’ve noticed you’re usually alone, so I thought it wouldn’t hurt to meet someone new,” he explained, and you, of course, got offensive.

“Oh, so I’m a loser after all, huh? Someone you need to help because I’m not capable of doing basic human things, like finding myself a friend? Don’t worry, I refuse to be your charity case so you can go on without worrying about me now.”

“What did I do to you? Why are you mad at me? If I offended you, I’m sorry. I never meant to do that. All I wanted was to be nice and friendly,” he explained. “I promise.”

You didn’t look at him, you were visibly mad. He sighed.

“I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean it to sound bad. I just wanted you to join us, well, join me, because I like you and I enjoy your company. But I didn’t really know how to be straight-forward with it, so I asked to join our table instead. Sorry, I really didn’t want to make a fool out of myself.”

“You wanted me to join you?” you looked at him, not quite sure what he meant. What someone so amazing could’ve wanted to do with you, you wondered.

“I wanted to ask you out,” he knew he had to finally be open about it, because otherwise it would just lead to more misunderstandings. “But at first I wanted to test if you even enjoy my company enough to say yes, that’s why I wanted you to join me at lunch. So we could have a real conversation.”

“So ask me out. Don’t force me to spend time with people that don’t want me there. Let’s go out, together, and try things out on our own,” you suggested. He liked the idea, so he nodded, smiling.

“Yeah, I’d like that. So, are you free on Saturday? We’d go to a restaurant. That is, if you want to, of course,” he smiled, still a little shy and unsure.

“And you really want this? Like… not to just make fun of some random nobody?” you asked, disbelieving. You thought there were hidden cameras around you and he will soon tell you it was all just a prank.

“You’re not a nobody,” he said immediately, defending you from yourself. “You’re smart and funny.”

“And I work as an errand girl. Such a prestigious position…,” you said ironically.

“So what? Your job doesn’t define you. Everyone started somewhere. Neither I nor anyone I respect judges people based on their job. Everybody has to earn a living somehow. And I’m sure that thanks to your job, you met more fun people than I did,” he gave you a big smile.

“Well, yeah… You,” you smiled shyly. “I would like to go out with you, if you really want us to. I’m sure it’ll be fun.”

And it was fun. He took you to a very fancy restaurant in that part of the city you didn’t even go to. Of course he told you beforehand that it will be one of those restaurants that expects elegant clothes, so you came prepared. You both, without consulting each other, ordered the same thing, so food was your first topic. It turned out, you had a lot in common. From then on, your conversation went smoothly, and he was able to make you laugh easily.

“You really thought I wanted to make fun of you?” he asked finally, looking at you. You looked down.

“I didn’t want to believe it myself, because you were always nice and I didn’t think you were really an asshole, but… A lot of people make fun of me because of how insignificant my job is. I guess it came out of my insecurities and frustrations. I’m sorry you had to be the innocent victim,” you muttered and looked at him. He was smiling comfortingly.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m not mad or anything. I just wanted to know whether I gave you a reason to think of me this way.”

“No, never,” you shook your head. “I was just hurt too many times I guess. It’s hard for me to trust people.” You smiled apologetically.

“I’m sorry to hear that you were hurt. But you don’t have to worry around me. I have no intention to hurt you. I really like you. And about those people who make fun of you because of your job – it’s the lowest of the low. Like literally, a job is a job and nobody should be judged for how they make money, unless they sell drugs or do other illegal business. And you actually have a cool job. You get to meet many interesting people and travel all around the world. Many people dream of a job like that. I mean it.”

“I don’t think anyone dreams of it, honestly…”

“I disagree. There are people who are introverts, who don’t want to be in the spotlight, but at the same time, they would like to have a chance to meet their favorite actor. So it’s a perfect job for many. Trust me, many people look at you and think you’re lucky. Even the people who said nasty things to you. The reason is always jealousy and their own insecurity. Happy people don’t put other people down,” he smiled at you and you actually believed him this time. You had to admit, he was right. “I know it’s easy to say, ‘don’t worry about those people.’ I know it’s not easy to actually stop caring. But the sooner you accept that they are in fact unhappy with their lives, so in turn, they want to bring other people down, the sooner you be much happier. You’re not the reason why they spread hate, they are. There’s nothing wrong with you and there’s a lot wrong with them.”

“That’s sweet of you to say. Thank you,” you smiled and he smiled back at you. “That’s how you deal with hate? Remember that it’s not your fault, but theirs?”

“Yeah. I know that many people wish to be in the position I’m in, to work with the people I worked with. So if they send me hate, I simply pity them for they have no life apart from jealousy. But if they hate on my fans, I have to react. It’s a different story. I can handle hate. But I won’t accept someone bringing my base down because they like me. It’s a really shitty thing to do. So I have to assure them they’re amazing and the haters are too sad and lonely to find actual friends so they only connect with other haters. Plain and simple.”

“Oh, yeah, I absolutely despise people who make fun of others because they like something else and they’re passionate about it. Like, there is no ‘superior music taste’ that makes you better than people listening to other genres. Or liking different movies. They are all made for the audiences to enjoy it, so if you enjoyed it, good for you. I could never understand how people say others are uneducated or uncultured because they liked something that the person didn’t like. Can we just all enjoy artists’ work in peace? We should only connect over what we like, not how much we hate others who like something we hate. It doesn’t even make sense.”

“I agree. So you understand it yourself, hate doesn’t make any sense,” he smiled and you nodded. “Imagine having nothing better to do than to spread hate. How sad is that?”

“Extremely sad…” you looked at him. “Thanks, Joe. You made me feel better.”

“That’s why I’m here,” he reassured you. “So, dessert?” he smiled and you took a menu.

“Always.”

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borhap-au · 3 years

Note

Hi! Before I start I just wanted to say that I loved your story with Joe and a depressed reader! It was so good and as someone who suffers with depression it made me feel seen😘 I was hoping that I could request one where the reader has low self esteem and thinks that Joe would be better off with someone else and she starts pulling away from him and he confronts her? If you can’t do it that’s totally okay I just figured I’d ask

First of all, thank you!

Second of all, I posted your request, hope you’ll like it!

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borhap-au · 3 years

Text

Joe Mazzello: the fluffy chronicles.

“You’d be better off with someone else”

Despite thinking long and hard, you weren’t able to answer the question “what you like the most about yourself,” because the truth was, there wasn’t such a thing. You hated your looks and your personality and your insecurity and… well, everything. The only good thing you found in your life was your relationship with Joe. He was a great boyfriend, very patient and understanding, but also loving and gentle. You loved spending your time with him – that is of course until the insecurity kicks in and ruin all the fun for you. You looked at him – a handsome, attractive man with a great sense of humor and amazing personality – and you couldn’t believe you dated him. But what you couldn’t believe even more, is why he dated you. In your opinion, he could’ve had any girl. He was charming, interesting and famous. There wasn’t a bad quality about him that you knew about. And yet he chose you, a “walking disaster,” as you liked to call yourself. And from that insecurity (and only from it, because Joe gave you no reason to think that) stem the idea that he will soon realize how bad you are, and how much better he can do, and he will leave you. So to save yourself some of the pain, you slowly started to distance yourself from him to make it easier later. It didn’t escape his attention.

You were sitting on a couch, watching a movie, but it wasn’t the usual scenario. Before, you would be snuggling to him and he would be petting your back. Right now, you were sitting at a distance, focusing on the movie instead of your boyfriend. He noticed.

“Y/N?” He looked at you concerned. “Did something happen?” He knew he had to be careful around you when you were feeling down. You were very fragile and he didn’t want to do anything to accidentally make it worse.

“No, why?” You looked at him for a short while and then came back to watching the movie. He moved closer to you and put his arm around you. You didn’t object, but your body was visibly tense.

“Are you sure? You seem a little different tonight,” he, on the other hand, paid no attention to the movie. He was completely focused on you.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you lied. It wasn’t a comfortable situation for you either. You missed his touch, but when you finally got it, you felt like you didn’t deserve it, like he should be with someone else right now, someone better than you. So you felt guilty for wasting his time.

“What’s with the distance then? And the sudden urge to watch the movie? We’ve seen it twice already, you never paid much attention to it,” he explained, but in truth, it wasn’t just about tonight. He felt your change of behavior much earlier than that, but for a while he thought it was just a phase that would soon pass.

“Third time’s a charm. I thought since we watched it so many times already, it would be nice to see the full movie at least once, to know what it is about,” he nodded at your answer. It sounded reasonable and you felt even worse about lying now that he believed in it.

He let it go for some time. Later that evening, you were making dinner and he came up to you, hug you from behind and started kissing your neck, as he usually did, to make your cooking a more pleasant experience. Usually you stopped, at least for some time, to enjoy his touch, but tonight you just continued making the meal ignoring his affection. You even moved away, trying to reach some ingredients, without minding his embrace. He stepped back.

“What is it this time?” he asked knowing very well it was never about the movie. He looked at you hurt and disappointed, but more in himself than in you. He hated the fact he couldn’t help you feel better.

“It’s nothing, really. I’m just really hungry, want to make the food quickly,” lies again. He didn’t fall for it twice, but he nodded his head, knowing you won’t tell him. You sighed seeing that. You didn’t want your last days together to be like that. You wanted him to have nice memories of you. “Don’t worry, Joey,” you muttered quietly while coming back to cooking. “The next girl will treat you better.”

“What?” he raised his brow, not believing what he just heard. “My next what?”

“Next girlfriend,” you repeated, not looking at him.

“Where did that come from? Why would I want another girlfriend?” he asked, visibly confused. He definitely didn’t expect to hear that.

“You know, someone who’s worthy of you. Someone… Who isn’t me,” it wasn’t easy to say, but it resonated in your mind for some time now. You believed wholeheartedly that you weren’t good enough for him.

“If my future girlfriend isn’t you, then I don’t want her,” you smiled under your breath hearing that. It was very sweet of him to say that.

“Joey, we both know you deserve so much better than me. Prettier, skinnier, smarter and funnier,” you said, trying to smile, but it wasn’t easy. “You deserve someone who will make you happy, instead of constantly getting you down. You deserve someone around who you won’t have to mind your words. A relationship in which you can be yourself, unapologetically, without always doing something for the other person.”

“I am unapologetically myself around you. It doesn’t bother me that you feel down sometimes. I mean of course, it’s a problem in a sense I would immediately want to make you feel better and I don’t like when you’re sad, but it’s not a thing that would make me break up with you, ever,” he held your hand to show you he means it.

“Baby, you can have a girl that’s so much prettier than me. And sexier. What about your friend? Or my cousin, you know which one,” you said and he laughed softly.

“Really, girly? You’re going to advertise me other women?” he smiled and pet your cheek. “I don’t want any other type of figure or any other type of beauty. I want your beauty. Why do you think I’m not capable of making my own decisions? I’m pretty grown up actually. I know you and I love what I know. I fell in love with you and not anyone else. And I’m very content with my choice. So let me have what I want, okay?”

“You will soon realize how awful I am and change your mind. Just wait, I know you will. And I don’t want to be around to have my heart broken when that happens,” he sighed hearing that and took his hand away.

“Really? You think I’m so moody that I would break up the happiest relationship I’ve ever had because of a whim? We don’t fight, we have mutual goals and we love each other. Why would anything change if it’s all so good? I like it now, I want to see no changes apart from you being happier and more confident in this relationship, because we… Well, we love each other still, right? I mean, do you love me?”

“Of course I do. I would be a fool not to love you,” you answered.

“That’s exactly how I feel about you. I love you, and I want to be with you and you only. You’re perfect for me, no one else is,” he reassured you. You sighed.

“I’m not perfect,” you muttered, and he came to you and hugged you tightly.

“You’re perfect for me. There are girls who have other qualities, maybe they have something that you want, but for me, you’re all I need. You have all the qualities I want in a girlfriend. You say there are skinnier girls? Girls that feel happier more often? Maybe. But at the same time I’m sure they would be annoying, or bossy, or whatever else. They have other qualities, sure. Qualities I don’t need. I chose you with my sane mind. I knew who you are and I chose you. Now I got to know you even better and I would still choose you, every time,” you hugged him tightly and started crying quietly.

“Even if I’m so boring…?” you muttered quietly.

“You’re not boring,” he reassured you, petting your back. “Actually, you’re fascinating to me. I love listening to you, especially when you’re passionate about something. It’s just so entertaining to watch. And I love looking at you, because you’re just my type. You have such a unique type of beauty, it’s so hard to find someone like you. And I found everything I ever needed in you.”

“What if you find someone better?” you didn’t look up saying that.

“Better from perfect? I don’t think so. I don’t know how I can explain that to you in other words, but life is not about being skinny, having perfect hair and clothes. For me relationships aren’t about that. That actress that you like so much? If I were with her you would probably think “that’s what he deserves,” meanwhile I would be suffocating in that relationship. Because she wouldn’t want to spend time with me like we do together, she would have other priorities, she wouldn’t get my sense of humor or whatever else. Your personality is perfect for me. So is your body, but I assume you won’t believe in that yet. But it’s true. So please, don’t push me away. Having this distance between us is a torture, really. Please, let us both be happy. Just be with me, and I’ll try to do anything I can to appreciate you like you should be appreciated. Can you do that for me?” You slowly nodded your head and only then looked him in the eyes. He smiled at you and kissed your lips softly.

“You’re sure you don’t want anyone else?” you asked after the kiss.

“I’m sure. Can you please stop asking me this question? I want you and you only. Did I ever do anything to make you feel otherwise?”

“No…,” you muttered quietly.

“So, please, don’t overthink it. If I had anything new to say to you, I would just say it, I wouldn’t expect you to learn that from some signs I’d give you. Really, I love you, and I will continue to love you, even if you break up with me. But please, don’t. I’m crazy about you,” he smiled, petting your cheek. You stood on your toes and kissed him softly. He kissed you back.

“Thank you,” you smiled after the kiss.

“Don’t thank me for that. And come on, you were hungry. We got to finish the meal,” said and this time he actually helped you out, not just by kisses. Although he planted some on your head and shoulder, because without them, it just wouldn’t be the same.

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borhap-au · 3 years

Note

Do you think you could please do a imagine or headcanon of what joe mazzello would do if the reader passed out. You don’t have to if you don’t want to But I would appreciate it if you did

Hey! Thank you for the request! So so sorry it took me so long to write it... The pandemic is really taking a toll on all of us. Not to mention the exam session that’s approaching... Anyway, I posted your request. I hope you’ll like it!

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borhap-au · 3 years

Text

Joe Mazzello: the fluffy chronicles.

Passed out.

Joe looked up from his phone and smiled when he saw you. You definitely caught his attention while you were walking down the street. You looked at him, but didn’t smile back. You were feeling sick and dizzy, you leaned on the wall to support yourself. You were breathing heavily and closed your eyes, hoping it would just go away. But it didn’t. Joe looked at you a bit surprised, not knowing what’s happening, but he wasn’t the one to bother strangers and he just assumed you were sad, maybe after a heartbreak. But as he approached you, you only felt worse and worse and finally you slipped down the wall and fell on the ground. Joe immediately run up to you.

“Excuse me? Miss? Are you alright?” He kneeled next to you and gently squeezed your hand to see if you respond. When you didn’t, he leaned over you and put his ear close to your mouth in hopes to hear your breath while also observing your chest. It was moving up and down steadily and he could hear your breath, so he sighed relieved. He lied you on your back and put your legs on your bag and his backpack to aid blood flow to the brain. He loosen the belt you had on your dress and took his phone to immediately call 911.

He stayed with you until the help arrived. They took you to the ambulance and asked whether Joe knew you. He admitted he didn’t, but he felt weirdly responsible for you, so he asked whether he could go with you. They agreed.

After they run all the exams and made sure you’re going to be alright, they put you in a room until you regain consciousness. After some time, you finally did. You slowly opened your eyes, trying to adjust to the bright lights in the room. Joe smiled at you.

“Hey. How are you feeling?” He asked and you looked at him trying to remember when you saw him before. He was like a fainted memory. You tried to speak, but your throat was too dry.

“Water?” you grunted quietly. He nodded and walked out of the room to try and find some water. When he did, he came back and helped you sit up and take a few sips.

“Is it better?” you nodded your head and covered yourself with the quilt.

“Why am I here?” you asked and Joe explained you how you passed out and needed to be rushed to the hospital. “And why are you here?” He didn’t have a good answer to that, other than he just needed to make sure this absolute stranger is feeling better.

“Empathy, I guess,” he smiled a bit embarrassed. “I just needed to make sure you’re going to be alright. I found you, so…” he shrugged. You gave him a little smile.

“Thank you for that. And for everything,” you put your hand on his and squeezed it gently. “If there is anything I can do for you, tell me. I’d like to repay you somehow for taking care of me.”

“Nonsense. I did what anyone would do, you don’t need to thank me for anything. And you most definitely don’t have repay me,” he replayed and pet your hand with his thumb. “I’m just glad to see you’re okay.”

“I insist. Can I at least… Invite you for a cup of coffee?” you took your hand away and smiled at the beautiful stranger.

“I don’t think coffee would be good in your current situation…”

“Then dinner. Let me invite you to a dinner. Please,” you didn’t give up. “Tonight.”

“Well, I guess I need to make sure nothing bad will happen to you. My car is parked not far from here, I can take you home,” he suggested and you nodded your head. You weren’t from this part of the town, it would be a long walk home.

“Yes, and after that, I will invite you to a great Italian restaurant near my home. We’re settled,” you smiled proudly. He chuckled and nodded.

“Alright then. We can do that,” he finally agreed. “I’m Joe, by the way,” he smiled and reached out his hand.

“Y/N,” you introduced yourself and shook his hand. “So Joey, huh? That’s the name of my prince in shining armor?” He chuckled hearing that. “Joseph the Great,” you joked smiling at him.

“I’m hardly that. I’m just glad I could help.”

Soon after that a doctor joined you. When they made sure you’re going to be okay, they monitored your heartbeat and talked with you about potential causes of the fainting and how to avoid them, they let you go. You held Joe’s arm as you were walking to his car. Less of a necessity, more of a personal pleasure, but you didn’t let it be known. He opened the door for you and you thanked him as you got in.

“Can I change the station?” you asked during the trip.

“Sure,” he nodded his head and you immediately tried to find the radio station that played classic rock 24/7. When you did, the beginning of “Somebody to love” could be heard from the speakers.

“I love this song,” you smiled sitting more comfortably in your chair.

“Me too. It’s my favorite Queen song, if not my favorite song in general,” he smiled and you looked at him surprised.

“Really?” he nodded. “It’s my favorite too!” And it was just the beginning of things you had it common. You talked about movies, TV series, books, and you found out you had very similar taste. While in the restaurant, you both ordered the same meal without consulting each other beforehand.

“Of course I like that movie. Come on, it’s about dinosaurs, who doesn’t like them?” you smiled. “Like Jurassic Park. It’s a classic!”

“You like it?” he smiled and in that moment you confirmed what he already suspected to be true – you had no idea who he was.

“Oh, yeah, totally. I watched it for the first time when as a kid and totally loved it. All other action movies usually only had adults in it, this one was better, cause it had kids I could relate to,” you smiled and drank your water while he tried to hide his smirk.

“And what do you think about the ginger kid? I think he was quite lame…” he started, but you didn’t let him finish.

“Take that back!” you chuckled. “I won’t allow you to say a bad word about him. He’s my biggest childhood crush,” Joe couldn’t help but let out a quiet chuckle. The situation was just too funny for him. “What?”

“Nothing, nothing,” he moved his napkin on his lips pretending to wipe them, while in reality he was hiding his big smile.

“No, it’s not nothing. Tell me what’s so funny. Are you laughing at me?” He shook his head.

“No, no. I’m just happy you liked my performance, that’s all,” it took you a second to realize what he meant.

“No, come on. It’s not possible,” you muttered in disbelief.

“Joe Mazzello, nice to meet you,” he even took out his ID to prove you he’s not joking. You looked at it and immediately turned red.

“Oh, my God, I’m so sorry! I feel so stupid right now for not recognizing you. That’s why you looked so familiar… Oh, God. Once again, so so sorry. I must still be dizzy from earlier,” you tried to justify yourself.

“Don’t worry about it. It was actually nice not to be treated differently because of my work for once. Quite refreshing,” he reassured you.

“Well… One thing I have to admit, you know how to make a great impression on a girl even without your star status.”

“I’ll drink to that,” chuckled and lifted his glass with lemonade and you clinked your glasses then both of you drank your non-alcohol drinks. “So, you had a crush on me, huh?” he chuckled quietly.

“I feel so embarrassed right now!” you turned even more red.

“Come on, it was cute!” he chuckled quietly.

“No, it’s embarrassing and you know it. Go on, tell me who your crush was…”

The conversation didn’t stop there, neither did your relation. It soon turned into a boyfriend/girlfriend situation and let me tell you, Joe loved telling everyone the story of how he “saved your life” on your first meeting. You found it annoying at first, but with time you learned to love it. After all, that situation brought you two together.

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borhap-au · 3 years

Text

Christmas 2020

Rami is that kind of a person who buys gifts throughout the entire year, just to be sure he’s safe on Christmas

also, he insists on making a few traditional meals his family always makes (and he’s a surprisingly good cook)

you decorated the Christmas tree together, but since both of you had a different concept, you ended up having two parts of the tree decorated in completely different ways

since you couldn’t meet with anyone, you had your families on video call

but it was even more exhausting than actually spending time with your family, so you were glad when it ended

you finished your meal and sat on Rami’s lap

he smiled, moving his arms around you, and kissing you passionately

he then took you on his arms and sat with you on the couch, next to the Christmas tree

he gave you the first gift

you were kind of embarrassed that you didn’t get him as many present as he did, but then again, you only started buying them in December, he had more time to prepare

you loved every single one of your presents, ‘cause Rami had unbelievable taste

he also very quickly learnt what you like, so any piece of clothing you got from him suited you perfectly

he also liked what you gave him

Rami told you a story about how he once went skiing on Christmas day and ended up with a bloody nose

and you ended up talking for a few hours about your funny childhood stories

you were wrapped in his arms, he was resting his head on yours

it felt nice and cozy and with him you could forget about the pandemic and everything else that was going on in the world

Ben always insisted on Christmas activities

usually you just went skiing or snowboarding

but this year, with all the restrictions, you had to stay home

so as soon as it started snowing, he went to the backyard with a shovel

you were preparing Christmas dishes, so you didn’t bother to go there for a few hours

and when you finally went, you saw a pile of snow that could easily serve as a small hill to slide from

you shook your head with disbelief, amazed by what you see

he smiled and asked you, “what do you think?” and you obviously loved it

he took the sled out of the basement, it was all clean and ready to go now

he was even thoughtful enough to put a blanket on it, so you didn’t get cold from the wooden seat

“come on,” he told you when he put the sled on top of the hill

you went there and smoothly sled down the hill

it wasn’t the same as Alps, but you had a lot of fun

especially when Ben took the string and started dragging you behind him on the sled

he spilled some water on the grass earlier, to make sure you’ll have an icerink

and now he was using it as a way to spin you around on the sled

you almost tripped a few times, but it was so much fun

you also ended up making a snowman

it had drumsticks as hands

and Ben also gave it one of his wigs

yes, you called the snowman Roger

and made sure Brian will know about it

Gwilym knew how much you missed your family and friends, so he made it his top priority to keep your mind away from worrying on the Christmas day

he spent the entire December preparing for a cute Christmas photoshoot he had planned

he bought props and even a green screen

he also bought you some new dresses, so you couldn’t tell him you had nothing to wear for the photos

and more than that, he got you a little puppy from the shelter, so you didn’t feel so sad and lonely anymore

the photoshoot included all kinds of beautiful Christmas scenarios, and the puppy even had his own little Santa Claus’ hat

there were a lot of costumes, Gwilym himself even dressed as Santa for one of the pics

apart from the SLR camera, Gwil had a polaroid, so you had some of the pictures out instantly

he then hung a string on the wall

and clipped the pictures to the string, making it the most beautiful Christmas decoration

you later had a debate about the puppy’s name

you ended up with “Sonny” 'cause you already treated him like a son

you made the puppy a bed out of pillows, but he ended up sleeping with you on the bed anyway

and Gwilym couldn’t help but post some of the pictures on his Instagram story, because he was so proud of the results

and you two finally learnt to use photoshop to change the green screen for some beautiful Christmas backgrounds

neither you nor Joey loved the idea of early waking up, so you decided to sleep late

when you woke up, you spent some time just hugging and kissing, because you liked the fact that finally didn’t have to hurry anywhere

after you both got ready, you closed all the curtains and turned on the Christmas lights

the room was filled with many colors and Christmas atmosphere

your Christmas tree was big and rich in ornaments

he played some Christmas music and you ended up dancing in the middle of the room

the fire was crackling in the fireplace when Joe was playing some Christmas tunes on the bass

after that, you watched every Christmas movie you liked, while eating some meals on the couch, with a plate in your hand

every year Joey did a video of your time spent together, a collage of all the pictures and videos summarizing your entire year and showing your best moments

this year, most of them were spent at home, but you didn’t mind, because you were together

Joey bought you a giant teddy bear (bigger than he is) because he heard you saying that you wished to have one since early childhood

you stood under a mistletoe for a good twenty minutes, being a little too naughty for Santa to bring you any presents, but you didn’t mind, ‘cause you were enjoying each other’s company too much

and you both unanimously agreed that you will be even naughtier to save Santa the trip

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borhap-au · 3 years

Text

tags:

@briarrose26

“No one understands”

Part two of Eugene Sledge x Black Reader.

“Courage meant overcoming fear and doing one’s duty in the presence of danger, not being unafraid.” - Eugene Bondurant Sledge

They talked long hours about inequality and the need for change. Neither of them even realized how late it was, until the room was completely empty and Eugene’s friend came to tell them they need to close the coffeehouse. They took their things, thanked the boy and went out of the shop.

“Well, I promised to get you back home safely,” he smiled while Angel shook her head.

“Oh, no. The only person I don’t want to mess with in this world is my dad. And he won’t be happy seeing me with a boy,” she chuckled quietly and he nodded his head.

“I understand,” after he said that, she felt a little bad. The real reason she did not want to let him walk her home, was because she promised her friend she will not be that “stupid.” However, she talked to him for hours and she grew to really like him. She did not want it to be their last meeting.

So she added, “but you know what? I finish my classes at 3 PM tomorrow. How about we meet in the coffeehouse around 3:30? I would like to talk to you some more,” she gave him a warm smile.

“I’d like that. You taught me a lot today. I’d love to find out some more,” he admitted. She fascinated him. Angel gave him a double thumbs up.

“Oh, no worry. I will bring a whole new set of facts and figures tomorrow. I must admit, you were a great student. I’m proud,” she chuckled quietly.

“And you were the best professor I’ve ever had. If only others could talk as interestingly as you do. Learning would be much easier,” he complimented her and she was really happy to receive such a compliment. Some guys complimented on her looks, others liked her personality and sense of humor, but she hardly ever received a compliment about her intelligence, which was the most important thing for her that anyone could point out about her.

“So, do we have an arrangement?” she asked, waiting for his reaction. “Will we see each other tomorrow?”

“Oh, most definitely. I wouldn’t keep a lady waiting,” she smiled in response. They said their goodbyes and each of them went their own way. Eugene turned around a few times to see her again. So did she, right before she turned to a corner she would not see him from, and their eyes met. They both smiled embarrassed. She was the first one to wave at him. He waved back. Then he lost her out of sight.

When he came back home, he kept on thinking about everything she said. Her words resonated in his mind. She was so right, about everything. Before that, he always thought not being a part of a problem was enough. That day he understood how important it was to actually be an active participant in the fight for justice. Fight other than physical, which was the only type they taught him in the military.

The next day he came a little early, as usual. He sat in the same corner and drank his coffee, waiting for her to show up. He really hoped she will not stood him up. He liked her and wanted to get to know her better. Minutes passed by, and she still did not show up in the door of the coffeehouse, despite Eugene observing it closely.

“I’m sorry for being late. They kept me longer in class,” she smiled apologetically, throwing her purse on the chair and sitting next to him.

“Oh, it’s not a problem. I hope you got home safely yesterday,” he started a conversation after the waiter brought her order.

“Yes, I did. It’s pretty close to my neighborhood. We all know each other there, I always feel safe,” she smiled and sipped her coffee.

“The sense of community is always nice,” he said while nodding his head. She wondered whether she should ask that question, but she couldn’t really help herself.

“Just like the army, right?” Angel looked at him biting her lip. She was not the one to be scared of tough conversations. Her topics were usually difficult, since she didn’t like a simple small talk. She wanted her life and her relations to be deeper and more meaningful than just that.

Eugene looked at her surprised, not expecting this kind of question at all. He put his coffee away and took a deep breath.

“You were in the army, weren’t you?” she asked, not wanting to let go that easily. She wanted to get to know him, and his army experience was obviously a huge part of his life.

“Yes, I was. For over three years,” he liked her. He wanted to be honest with her, but it really wasn’t the kind of topic he wanted to explore.

“My friend’s brothers all went to war. Most of them even returned. They enrolled even though their father was doing everything he could to get that idea out of their heads. His own father was born into slavery and he could not understand how could anyone risk their life for a country that enslaved their ancestors, tortured them and raped the women to create more free labor. But they went anyway. You know why?” he shook his head. He had some ideas, but preferred to let her speak. “Because that is their country. It was created on slavery. Slaves made the United States. Not to mention all those asshole who’d say we cannot decide for this country if we didn’t fight for it.”

Eugene nodded his head. He remembered very well all the slurs he heard directed at the Black community. He reacted every time, but unfortunately it rarely changed anything other than the soldiers’ opinion of Sledge.

“Not to mention the Double V. Victory in Europe and victory here. Have you heard about it?” she asked looking at Eugene.

“Yes, actually, I did. I support the cause wholeheartedly. I can’t imagine how it must feel… It’s already hard enough coming home from war, feeling estranged and misplaced. I can’t imagine how it felt for them, coming back to a segregated country that doesn’t even allow you to sit in the front of the bus, even though you risked your life for freedom of that country…” he scoffed and shook his head. “The greatest democracy in the world, fighting with the nationalistic regime of Germany whose segregated country used the US as their role model for that separation.”

She raised her eyebrow and he nodded, confirming what he has just said is true.

“In the 30s, when they were isolating Jews from the rest of the society, they looked at the American model of segregation. I read a report on it. I guess the United States must be really proud to be such a great idol for others,” he said ironically.

“That’s just outrageous…” she sighed and then looked at him. “Can you tell me the stories you have of Black soldiers? I ask this question to anyone I know who went to war.” He hesitated, not being happy about speaking of war, but finally agreed, since he did not have to talk about himself specifically.

“The situation was no better than the one back here. The troops were segregated. At the beginning they didn’t even allow none of the Black men to carry a gun. I guess they were scared of a revolution, or whatever other thing white men thought they obviously deserved for their actions. So the Black men were used for other things. They unpacked the trucks, cooked, drove cars. Only later, when we were short of men, they allowed Black troops to actually fight. A lot of them became great pilots. I really respect their courage, cause after all they fought for a country which doesn’t even treat them like full citizens…”

“’Like actual humans,’ that’s what you wanted to say. You don’t have to be afraid of the truth,” she interrupted him. “It’s because of the Double V. We need justice all over the world, we need to stop racists in America, Europe and everywhere else. We don’t stop here, it’s just a start. We managed to win in Germany, so why not here?” she smiled, and her smile was full of hope that one day things will be better.

“I understand their reasons now. Thank you, it became cleared to me,” Eugene smiled. He already loved listening to her. She spoke with such energy and faith in her cause. “But I have to tell you, their determination was like no other’s. Because I don’t know a single white man who would keep on pushing and trying to get in combat for a country that segregates army’s bathrooms… Hell, they segregated even blood donations! Can you imagine that? As if Black blood was any different from white… I mean, it’s red. It’s blood.” She just shook her head with disapproval and disgust, but she was not surprised at all. What for him was a shocking news, for her was everyday life.

“There’s a great poem, I don’t know if you heard about it. It’s called ‘Beaumont to Detroit’ by Langston Hughes,” she looked at him expecting a reaction, but he just shook his head.

“I’m sorry, I never heard of it,” he admitted, ashamed he was not familiar with it. She took a book out of her bag. It was a notebook with a handwritten title: “Poems of Freedom, Justice and Equality.” She opened it on selected page and began to read the poem to him.

“’…I ask you this question/Cause I want to know/How long I got to fight/BOTH HITLER – AND JIM CROW,’” she finished reading the poem and looked at him for reaction. He did not say anything for a long moment.

“That’s… That’s a really good poem. And it touches all the painful spots. I’m just really sorry, on behalf of all men…”

“No, don’t apologize for them. They wouldn’t apologize. They don’t apologize and they won’t apologize. They don’t feel sorry. You feel sorry, and you have nothing to apologize for. You’re one of the good guys. We don’t judge people because of what they ancestors did to us. We judge people by their current actions. We want to be heard, acknowledged. We understand that living your whole life in a country based on slavery might’ve made you turn a blind eye on some issues. We understand that the systemic racism made you believe in certain things. We really know all of that. But it doesn’t excuse anyone from learning. The problem is very often ignorance. People just assume something is this way because it’s ought to be this way. Or they say something in supposedly good faith, and when we educate them about it being a wrong thing to say, they don’t want to acknowledge their mistake. That I don’t understand and I won’t accept. Everyone makes mistakes. As a white man, you cannot know about all the issues a Black woman faces. But you should be willing to learn about them and fix your mistakes,” Eugene thought to himself that this girl should be a universally known speaker. She spoke with such respect, intelligence and charisma. She knew how to put the issues so that everyone understood her. She could’ve been the next Sojourner Truth if they let her. And it was then when it hit him. Why has he heard of so many Black male orators, but so few women? Was it that the system wanted to silence Black women in particular? Was the problem rooted not only in racism, but also in sexism? Yes, of course it was. Eugene could not believe it took him so long to see how oppressed were the Black women, who had to fought not just with white men, but also with white women, who did not want to acknowledge their femininity, in order to cut them from the feminist movement.

“So teach me. Tell me, please. If you want to. What are the most common mistakes white people make? I’ll try to teach others about them, so we can all know better,” she smiled hearing that. She thoroughly enjoyed having such a clever student.

“First of all, stop with the ‘I don’t see color’ thing. I’m glad you acknowledge that a color of one’s skin shouldn’t be a reason to treat them as a lesser human. I mean, it should be obvious, but unfortunately it isn’t. But it’s not a good thing to say things like that. Because by ‘not seeing color’ you don’t acknowledge the pain and struggle Black people have to endure every single day. Another thing – could the white ladies just stop asking to touch our hair? We’re not their puppies to pet. And don’t assume you understand. Don’t talk about those issues as if they were yours. It’s not just for you specifically, of course, is directed at all white people. I hear all too often them discussing our experience as if they were all-knowing. You have no idea. You have just the point of view of the oppressor, even if you don’t oppress anyone knowingly or purposefully. You didn’t live the struggle, so respect the fact you don’t know how it feels,” he actually took out a notebook and wrote down some of the things she said, as she continued to lecture him. They talked about race and social issues, and then their conversation turned more casual. They talked about books and poetry and exchanged some names they might like to read. Finally, Eugene found the courage to ask the question he thought about for some time.

“Would you like to maybe go out with me? Like… Not for a coffee, for a dinner for example,” he smiled and then looked down, being a little shy. He did not ask a girl out since he was in high school, apart from that one ball after he returned from the war, but neither he nor the girl enjoyed their time there.

Angel smiled slightly, but needed to remind him of something that he did not realize as he usually did not have to live with it. She was not surprised he did not know. Most white people do not think of such things before making plans, because the issue did not involve them.

“If you can find a restaurant that will allow us to sit there, sure,” her smile was a little sad. In Washington maybe it would be easier, but they were still in Alabama. “They usually don’t allow mixed couples in the public eye, you know, not to ruin their reputation. Black people are hardly allowed in any fancy places anyway.”

“So… I invite you to my house. I’ll cook the dinner,” he smiled. Of course, he did not think of the reputation his household will have among his neighbors after that event, but if anyone reminded him of it, he would say he did not care. If they had a problem with that, then it means they were racist, and he did not wish to affiliate himself with such people. “I can pick you up from wherever you want. I assume your father may not appreciate my presence at your house.”

“Oh, no. Just give me the time and address. I will definitely be there and get there on my own. I cannot wait to see what you’ll make for that dinner,” she gave him a big smile. She wrote down the address and they agreed on the time. They were both really happy about the meeting. Neither of them commented on how happy they were, because they did not want to jinx it or appear weird, but they definitely could not wait for the Saturday to come. And it sure looked promising.

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