greenapricot

[greenapricot]

Okay, buckle up buckaroos, because today I met an honest-to-goodness cryptid.

I was out running errands and I made a stop at Intimate Books (…for a friend), and on my way out I realized that the bookshop next door was open.

This bookshop has existed for more than a hundred years, and in all my life it has NEVER BEEN OPEN. I mean, I assume it has to be open sometimes, but never at any normal, reasonable hour. Everyone says it’s a front for the mob or something.

So what do you do when the weird mafia bookshop is open? You go the fuck inside.

The first thing I noticed was the smell. You know that smell when you accidentally leave your towel on the bathroom floor all day and you come back to that mildew funk? The shop smelled like that times a thousand. I expected to see stuff growing on the walls, but the books were pristine. We’re talking first editions, rare editions, weird Bibles and books inscribed to really famous dead people. Librarians would weep for the chance to accession this place. In the first two minutes I found a signed copy of The Crucible and what I think was a first edition of Blake’s Book of Thel.

Then a clerk showed up out of nowhere—honestly nowhere. He looked EXACTLY like a bookseller should look, kind of fluffy and bewildered and really, really gay.

“Are you lost?” was the first thing he said to me.

“Nope. Just browsing, thanks.”

“Browsing, I see. Erm. How do you feel about snakes?” he asked. And without waiting for me to answer, he just walked away and vanished around a shelf.

I figured it was a metaphor, or a code phrase for the mafia. Until I turned a corner like ten minutes later and found a little reading nook. It was really pretty, although I feel like that particular window should have been on an interior wall? Anyway, curled up in an armchair in a patch of sunlight was the biggest fuck-off black snake I have ever seen.

Like, I don’t mind snakes in general. But in their normal context, right? Outside. On the ground. Not six feet long and sitting on a threadbare velvet armchair like it owns the place.

I was about to turn around and leave, but I saw a gorgeous first-edition copy of Leaves of Grass on a shelf, a little too close to the snake for comfort. But I had never needed anything so badly in my life.

So I went back to the counter to buy it, but the clerk was nowhere to be found.

While I was waiting, I noticed a collection of pictures hanging on the wall behind the counter, dating back to the very dawn of photography. A couple were of this rock-star looking guy from the 70s that I should probably have recognized, but there were authors and landscapes and stuff, too. There was even an old tintype portrait of Oscar freaking Wilde, sitting in this very shop with a guy that I would ACTUALLY SWEAR was the clerk from before. Like, I know my family all has the same nose, but this guy had the same everything.

After approximately one year of waiting, the clerk came back out to the desk. By now I’ve realized that he’s too bad at his job to be anything but the owner of the shop.

“I saw your snake,” I told him.

“Did you? Was he behaving himself?”

“He was sleeping.”

“Yes, he enjoys that.”

“Does he just stay out in the open like that? What if he gets out?”

He shrugged and smiled. “He always comes home again, the dear boy.”

Right, a homing snake. That’s totally normal.

Then he cleared his throat and asked, in a weirdly reluctant voice, if I was going to buy the Whitman.

“Yes, please,” I told him. “I saw it on a shelf by the snake, and it was just too tempting.”

He sighed. “Oh, yes, I expect it was.”

When I started to hand him my card, he went all fluttery and said that they didn’t take cards.

All right, fine. I had some cash on me, but I told him that he’d sell a lot more books if he got a Square or something.

He got this scandalized look on his face and went, “Why would I want to do that?”

Oookay. I handed over the cash and he popped open the ancient till and started making change.

In shillings. Shillings! I swear to god I saw Queen Anne’s face on one of them. The silver value of the coins was probably as much as I paid for the book.

But I had to have proof that this happened—at that point, all I had was a book in a plain brown wrapper, not appreciably different from what I bought next door. So I asked him for a receipt.

He looked delighted and wrote one up for me.

By hand.

With a fountain pen.

And that’s the story of how I met a bookseller cryptid and his pet snake.

#i love this #good omens #fic rec #go fic

[greenapricot]

Bob Radlinski

#photography #landscape #england

[greenapricot]

when I see something dated 2019 I think “oh that’s not too long ago” and then I remember that 2019 was not only five years ago but those five years have somehow contained several lifetimes

[greenapricot]

(x)

#robbie lewis #james hathaway #inspector lewis #intelligent design

[greenapricot]

If you want to track down the orchestra members and have a word, it's probably more up your street than Jim's or mine. Most likely just putting a name to him. Be alright with that? I should think I'll manage.

#endeavour #itv endeavour #fred thursday #endeavour morse #roger allam #shaun evans

[greenapricot]

i think what’s on a person’s nightstand is very telling so reblog this and put in the tags the things you have on your nightstand

#6 books (one of which I'm actively reading) #(most of the others are poetry) #eye mask #ear plugs #lavender and lemon ginger cbd salves #lotion #valerian pills (in case i can't sleep) #thyroid pills (to take first thing in the morning) #travel mug full of water (the cover keeps the cats from drinking it in the night)

[greenapricot]

After a long time in the sea, under a clear waterfall 👀

Bonus :)

#art #fanart #our flag means death #izzy hands #lucius spriggs #ofmd fanart

[greenapricot]

#granada holmes #sherlock holmes #john watson #jeremy brett #david burke

[greenapricot]

Hi! All the titles sound intriguing but I'd like to ask about the Shetland fic. Your Shetland x Lewis crossover is what got me hooked on that fandom in the first place! Thank you! =)

Funny you should mention Lead me wild to your dark roads, because The finish line (a good place to start) is actually the unintended second part of the now three part series. Part two is Jimmy and Duncan back at the house after driving back from the airport. Part three is James and Robbie (and Laura) in New Zealand (and James texting Duncan).

The James texting Duncan part is how this fic came about. I realized that I needed to know what happened between Jimmy and Duncan before I could have Duncan tell James about it, and while figuring that out I ended up writing 2/3 of a fic.

“Who was that?” Jimmy asks, when Cassie leaves the kitchen to put her things in her room.  “James?” Duncan asks. Jimmy isn’t fooled by Duncan’s playing dumb, he never is, but Duncan would like to put this conversation off as long as possible when Cassie could be back down any minute.  Jimmy nods, giving Duncan a look that’s more than halfway to not pleased. “Aye, James.”  Duncan shrugs. “He’s a friend.” “A friend like [ woman Jimmy caught Duncan having wine with ] is a friend?”  Jimmy may be accusing Duncan of something that he absolutely did do, but it still stings. He didn’t regret it when he woke up in James’ bed the next morning, that’s not why he left, he left to make things simpler. He doesn’t regret it now, but he does regret hugging James in the airport in front of Jimmy, giving himself away. DI James Hathaway thinks Jimmy is in love with Duncan, but the narrowed brows and pinched line of his mouth say something else entirely. “What’s that supposed to mean?”  “You said you and Mary were on the outs, but you were trying to sort things out. I’ve been letting you stay here so you could…” Jimmy sighs, long suffering, closes his eyes for a moment then opens them again, gaze accusing. “It’s men now as well?” “It’s always been men as well.” 

Ask me about my wips

#wip meme #fic meme #my fic

[greenapricot]

The vase needs flowers.

#art #fanart #our flag means death #blackbeard #edward teach #stede bonnet #ofmd fanart

[greenapricot]

New Good Omens drawing ✏️

#art #fanart #good omens #crowley #go fanart

[greenapricot]

Reeds pencil and digital

#this is so ethereal #i love it #art #illustration

[greenapricot]

(x)

#james hathaway #robbie lewis #inspector lewis #entry wounds

[greenapricot]

Forgot to post here haha

#this is gorgeous #and heartbreaking #i love it #art #fanart #animation #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #go fanart

[greenapricot]

“Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from the nightly shore— Tell me what thy lordly name is on the night's Plutonian shore. Quoth the raven, ‘Nevermore’.” Well, that's how Mr. Poe saw the raven.

NORTHERN EXPOSURE 3.10 Seoul Mates

#one man's saviour is another's man's pair of lead boots #northern exposure #chris stevens

[greenapricot]

“When Hector enquired how well I knew Mr Brown, I said not at all. Please don’t make me lie to you as well.”

Anna Chancellor & Peter Capaldi in The Hour season 2 episode 1 (2012) dir. Sandra Goldbacher

#the hour #lix storm #randall brown #anna chancellor #peter capaldi

[greenapricot]

reblog to give somebody a fucking hug because we are all struggling to get through it. solidarity in this tough ass world.