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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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Don’t let them bring you down.

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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Remember that. ❤️❤️❤️

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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“There is nothing beautiful about wanting to die. You think it’s poetic, but my dear, you can’t write poetry from the grave.”

••• romanticized mental illnesses

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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YES! 👏🦋 #STOPNORMALIZINGSUICIDE

HEY ATTENTION PLEASE

hey! hi! so a friend and i are working on an anti-suicide thing. its really simple, and it can make a huge difference. we’re just kind of catching each other and ourselves when we make a suicidal/self-deprecating joke and using other ways to express ourselves. it’s something that has helped me a lot in the past, and i think other people can benefit. please please please let me know is you are interested in taking part in this anti-suicide pact.

suicide jokes normalize the idea that it’s an option when it shouldn’t be, and i understand that it may genuinely help people cope, so it’s okay if you’re not ready to stop. just please know that there’s people who are looking out for you.

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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I remember feeling desperate for love. I was so excited to move to Boston, and be in a big city filled with girls. I wanted a girlfriend so bad. I wanted SOMEBODY to love me. But I guess not just anyone.. someone that I found better than myself. All the ones who had come before her couldn’t compare. This girl was BETTER than me. She was everything that I admired; everything I strived, but failed to be. I wanted to be good in school, I wanted to be beautiful, I wished I had blue eyes and brown hair, I wished I was naturally funny, naturally kind. My brain is always so scattered and I’ve always struggled to articulate what I’m feeling, but she did it so beautifully. i saw the way she carried herself, and I admired that.it became my goal to get her to feel something for me. Because if a girl like THAT could feel something for ME, that HAD to mean I was worth something, right? I fell in love with the idea of the kind of validation that could bring me. maybe if I could get my dream girl to fall in love with me, I could finally love myself. I was so close.. I was so fucking close. My self worth rested in her hands. I remember the night so clearly; her telling me that she felt the same way. “It’s impossible not to have a crush on you, you’re the greatest.” those words are engraved in my mind. I would recite them over and over, reminding myself that i had to be worth something, if the girl of my dreams felt that way.. until she didn’t anymore. Although I think I convinced myself she had lost feelings for me long before she actually did. My own insecurities had me second-guessing every interaction. My worth rested in her hands, I couldn’t lose her.. losing her would mean losing myself. Losing the validation I had finally found. I needed her. But more pulled away, the tighter I held on. I really held on until there was absolutely nothing left to hold onto. She was long gone. She left and took my self worth along with her, which is why I’ve never been able to move on. Because the day she left, was the day I lost the validation I had only found once before. The key to getting over her? Realizing that she is no better than I am. Her perception of me doesn’t reflect my worth whatsoever. I am worthy of love. I am beautiful too. I am talented too. Red hair and blue eyes are just as good as brown hair and blue eyes. I am kind too. I am everything that I have sought out for in the perfect lover. I find validation within myself. I am valid. I am worthy. I need to fall in love with myself first. THAT is the key to getting over it.

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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Hey, you! Stop scrolling!

Hi! If no one's told you this today, I want to lovingly tell you that you are doing so so good! I'm so fucking proud of how far you've come and I know you'll continue to make it even further! Keep up the great work!

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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There are going to be many people who do not see your worth. Don’t let yourself be one of those people.

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lxlyoudonthavetodielxl · 5 years

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