mystayathomemomlife

[mystayathomemomlife]

9 year old me: mom you’re beautiful!

My Mom: no, I’m ugly. The ugliest. I’m a horrible pig of a person

Other people: (to me) you look just like your mom

Me: so I’m ugly

Now:

My 9 year old: mom you’re beautiful

Me: thank you! I don’t always see it very well in myself though because my brain lies to me a lot and tells me I’m ugly even though I’m not. But I can’t be ugly because we look a lot alike and you’re beautiful. My brain is just a bully 

My kid: that’s right! We’re BOTH beautiful!

​Me:​ yes we are!​​​

_____

And that my friends is called thinking about how your self depricating words can hurt other people around you. I can’t see that I’m beautiful most of the time but I can acknowledge that the issue is my ability to see myself in a positive way. 

But calling myself ugly just hurts the people who love me. It could even convince my kid that they are also ugly and further the cycle 

And sometimes it’s really hard just by saying “I’m being mean to myself because my brain lies a lot matters

[mystayathomemomlife]

“Success is not only the story of your achievement but it is the story of your struggle”

— S.S.K

[mystayathomemomlife]

❤️

#tumblr milestone #50 likes #tumblrmilestone #50likes

[mystayathomemomlife]

Sleepless Sleep

💜Laying in bed, trying to fall far and deep into a slumber that my body and mind have yearned for all As I feel myself falling, my mind starts to scream in silence. 🖤Millions of thoughts and thousands of moments come rushing in; as if uncontrollably flooding my sleepy mind - drowning me. I’m forced into an unwanted realm; deep inside my conscience. It feels like my heart is at war..fighting my thoughts. Never over one particular thing; but every single negative thought and moment, everything I have ever felt any shame or guilt over; and all at once. Wether it happend when I was 3 years old or 20. Doesn’t matter how petty or immense it may have been or even seemed. 💜I need a switch. To turn myself off. To not think. To just rest. But instead, I lay at night restlessly torturing myself; and as those unwanted thoughts form into warm salty drops that fall away, I immerse into this seemingly eternal sleepless sleep. 🖤-H.B.

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First time I’ve written in over ten years. It feels good.💕🌄

#heather bruch #my writing #journal #2019 #April 2019 #my struggle #depression #anxiety #postpartum #stay at home mom #mental health support #brooksmama22

[mystayathomemomlife]

“Two years ago I wanted to stop existing.

Hard to believe I made it

While that pain kept persisting.

Marks on my neck of stories untold.

I wanted to be selfish

But I couldn’t bring myself to let go.

Two brutes attempted to destroy me

Leaving nightmares that come and go.

I’m learning to set myself free.”

-K.N.B.

#quotes #2019 #April 2019

[mystayathomemomlife]

#quotes #life #journal #nastalgia #2019

[mystayathomemomlife]

#quote #selfmotivation #journal #2019

[mystayathomemomlife]

#toabetterme

[mystayathomemomlife]

Dear Me,

Where have you gone?

I miss you.

Sincerely,

Yourself

[mystayathomemomlife]

Why does it seem easier for others to achieve happieness?

[mystayathomemomlife]

Me🖤

[mystayathomemomlife]

two people died that mournful day but only one soul went heaven’s way the soul that on earth remained becoming so consumed in grief’s pain a ghostly shadow of their former self a soul now hiding where few dare delve but delve I must and delve I will keep on delving deep until fully revived is the soul of my life

[mystayathomemomlife]

🤪

#25 posts #tumblr milestone

[mystayathomemomlife]

“Before I was yours, I was mine.”

— Unknown (via syntacked)

#quotes

[mystayathomemomlife]

Another melted crayon and glitter glue picture. I made this for my niece.

#myart

[mystayathomemomlife]

i need someone who understands my fucked up brain.

[mystayathomemomlife]

#happiness