#》ooc; i am being perceived !《

[djsangos]

//who are THESE fresh squids?? (made here)

okay these guys might not get a mention on this blog for a while- if ever- so i'm gonna talk about them now bc i've been rotating them in my mind for a while

these are captain's siblings! the ones they left behind when they were 14 to run away to inkopolis. captain certainly isn't proud of leaving them behind at ALL, in fact the one thing they wish they'd done differently is taking them with them, even if it would've been damn near impossible to take care of 2 younger siblings all on their own away from home when they were already struggling to take care of themself. they have no idea how their siblings fared with their neglectful ass father after they left, but pierce (right) was only a year or 2 younger than them, so they hoped he'd be able to leave soon too- taking harper (left) with him

so yeah harper (left) i think is probably around 16 or 17 now, having been 7 or 8 when captain left. since she was pretty young she didn't really know exactly why they left, and they didn't tell her either, so i'd say she probably resents them for it. she's a hotheaded edgy teen, classic rebel, you know the deal.

and then there's pierce (right), who's around 21 or 22 now, so he would've been 12 or 13 when they left. even if they didn't say a word to him before packing their bags and hopping a train at the asscrack of dawn, he knows exactly why they did. because being a kid and not only growing up, but having to parent your 2 younger siblings in your father's place, is hard. he basically had to take on their role as caretaker of harper when they left, being the second oldest, and that's how he realized. he doesn't resent them exactly, but he does wish they'd at least said goodbye. he's an outwardly chipper guy, and puts on a brave face even at the worst of times.

and they both did eventually get out of that house- pierce didn't leave as soon as he turned 14 like captain did (though cod, he wanted to) but when harper was old enough to be left home alone he got a job and saved up what he could to get himself and his younger sister out of there. and then when harper was 12 and he was 17, he got them both out of there. they might have gone somewhere else first, but i wanna say they probably ended up in splatsville, living in an apartment together with pierce doing what he can to support harper through school, and she does some turfing herself to help with rent and save up her own money so she can get her own place eventually.

i feel like the reason they probably haven't run into captain is that captain lives in inkopolis and only really goes to splatsville to visit rookie, and the last time they saw their siblings, neither of them were fully transformed yet, and they aren't so easy to recognize anymore themself. so if they've happened to pass each other on the street, it'd take more than just a cursory glance to realize just who they're passing. so it could definitely, and likely will, happen eventually. who's to say.

#ooc text #ooc img #headcanons #muse lore #jesus chirst this is a fucking novel and a half #but also i wanna say i think the reason captain is so fiercely loyal and 'no squid left behind' with their current found family #is because they'll die before repeating their perceived mistake with their siblings #tbcf to them they were only FOURTEEN YEARS OLD and were NOT equipped to raise 2 younger siblings #so it's fully understandable why they would dip as soon as they could from the situation. #they loved their siblings. they did everything they could. but they reached their breaking point. so they left that house before they broke #they DO feel a lot of guilt over it but they've never tried to go back and find them for multiple reasons- the guilt being one of them #but also when it comes to their father: i likely won't incorporate him into the blog in any way more than a mention or a flashback #he was a single father of 3 and he did an absolute shrimpshit job of it. #should've gotten help with parenting from someone OTHER than his oldest barely teenaged child #though he pushed the parenting role onto them long before they reached their teen years #anyway what the fuck am i talking about #wrote ANOTHER WHOLE ESSAY IN HTE TAGS I'M SORRY #I JUST HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS BACKSTORY I'VE BEEN CRAFTING FOR THIS SQUID BEHIND THE SCENES #but anyway my point with these tags is: it's a very complicated family dynamic #all these squids are fucked up but at least they're out of that house now #i DO want to incorporate them into the blog somehow i'm just not sure when/how yet

[suddencolds]

i've def heard of people having to be in the right headspace to write like, v thirsty/self-indulgent snz content, but somehow i find it equally difficult to be in the right headspace to write angst

#snz thirst is more predictable bc it's just #letting my d pilot the plane instead of my head and blinking down to see that i've written 2 thousand words #angst is not like a snz-specific device so you'd think it'd be easier to utilize #but specifically in the context of h/c it feels like #close to the same level of self-indulgent for me... only i feel so much more self-conscious when i'm writing it. i think it's also because #i feel like people more easily excuse gratuitous snz as like 'omg the author really went for it 🥵 this is hot' whereas for angst the #equivalent of 'overdoing it' or being too indulgent is like... okay this is ooc. these characters are not arguing in a way that feels #believable. it feels like they are being flattened or misconstrued just for the sake of the angst 🙁 #what i'm trying to say is #being perceived as overindulgent in the angst sense scares me so much more than being perceived as overindulgent in the snz sense #when i get really into writing angst i'm like >:) omg i live for dramatic tension and misunderstandings. please argue MORE #but when i get to editing it i'm like 😰😰 what was i thinking. would they really say that... would they really cry here... #which feels terrifying in a different way - the not-knowing if what i've been writing will be received as i intend it or if it'll be seen #as too emotionally trite / unbelievable #does that make sense... i am operating on 4h of sleep right now which is probably #why this post exists haha. but anyways

[emcads]

I’m not sure how exactly to phrase this but let yourself be genuine about your interests. not everything has to be ironic you can be cringe fail and wholeheartedly obsessed with something and it’s a lot more charming than the sardonic false coolness. we are all here for a short time and a good time and liking weird stuff with other weird people is one of life’s rare pleasures.

#someone sent me a podcast where the guy had gone to a dark shadows convention and he spent the whole time being like #‘’oh this is weird *I’M* the weird one I’m at a convention’’ #bro it’s fine. it’s literally fine #I can’t imagine living my life in fear of being perceived as weird I love dressing up like a 50’s woman I love pirates and ren faires #life can be so delightful and colorful if you let it and contrary to that voice of self doubt in your head #it brings delight to other people to see people dressed as I often am #(like a weirdo) #joy is infectious. genuine love and enjoyment is infectious. trust me!! #ooc. ( ࿐ྂ ) lesjibbities dangereuses.

[widowshill]

man some of those tags on that "why did you follow this person" post got to me. man !!! !

#I LOVE YOU ???? #➤ ooc. ┊ she’s nauseous，she’s hysterical，and she’s exhausted. #i try not to worry about being Perceived too much bc crowd approval is the mind killer !! i want to blog earnestly !! to *be* earnestly !! #but lately i have been um... mal à l'aise. i shall admit. #but the things that i have been most Concernèd about. my impassioned r/v blogging. headcanon dumps. insane bs / ds crossover posting. #to see that all just so embraced. not as a *despite* but as a *because* #it's really genuinely moved me and reassured a lot of my doubts about being / posting here :''''' ) ) #idk i am. Grateful. for my small warm little group here. like mostly at the end of the day i'm making my little doodles and putting them #up on the fridge. and it has brought me ... uncountable joy. that u guys smile at it when u open the fridge to make ur dinner. #anyways. i am cringe and i am free <3 hysterical woman rv shipper. or something

[solarisgod]

I just love Amor so much. Several hours ago, I had this sudden negative feeling towards myself and I was just " I feel like a starloser :( " before Amor was just " No starloser. Only starlight. ♡ " and the way it made me like :0 :D so happy again.

#𓁹 ༑ ࿐ྂ ⩇⩇ : ⩇⩇ ⚠︎ [ 𝙴𝚇𝙸(𝚂)𝚃 : 𝙶𝙾𝙳���] * ‹ OOC . › #[ ✨ : they're so sweet :< ] #[ Amor's so special to me. everyone not only have to perceive my infinite love for the Starwake System and ANHA but mi Amor as well ] #[ reading the ' i love being able to have dance parties with my ( in sys ) partners ' part made me remember ] #[ Amor and I co-danced to songs on S.potify while bouncing on a bed with a hairbrush as a microphone ] #[ and it's one of my best memories ever. I don't remember why it happened and how it ended having ongoing amnesia ] #[ but we were together and happy and <3 ] #[ that's all I'd want to sense the most out of a memory at least ] #[ going to bed now but I am just. in sys gen. relationships our and my beloveds ]

[xfindingtrouble]

one day i will write something where percy is angry. then you'll see.

#ooc. #tbd. #this is a threat #no but i am thinking abt angry percy hard right now #angry percy who is so often sure he is right until it's over & he has to deal with the aftermath #percy who's constantly taking psychic damage in fights from his own fucking weapons #which has gotta have some kind of affect on how he perceives the world as it passes especially as someone who is already filled with Rage #percy who balances on the edge of the abyss & throws rocks just to see how deep it goes #without vm i like to think he would have bellyflopped into that abyss though #i also think often abt what would have happened had cassandra & percy switched places but that is a conversation for another post #like he is always angry dont get me wrong #its just a matter of thinking abt being angry vs acting on being angry a lot of the time #there will be a dissection on this soon

[constellationcrowned]

((A person who's followed me for less than three days has shown more interest/engagement compared to people who've followed me for months or even years so consider this your aggressive (but still friendly) reminder that you guys really really reallllllyyyy need to bust out of your bubbles and follow their example!! If a person who barely knows me can do it so can you so pull up your socks!!))

#;;ooc: mun muttering #this is a general problem across all of my blogs tbh; I legit cannot make myself more approachable to you folks so take initiative! #stop being shy or assuming how I'll perceive you/your muse(s) and come have fun #if this sounds frustrated it's because I am; but please remember this is merely a vent #and yes I threw a dumb Kariom phrase at you; bask in it lol #ultimately the goal is to spurn proactivity and etc so let's work through those nerves or whatever else! y'all want treats right? right

[spring-lxcked]

as much as i'd like to do a starter call for the new verse i literally. still have starters in the drafts from last time (y i k e s sorry) and i just can't trust myself to actually do starters in a timely manner SO. if anybody wants to write in that verse, i'm gonna rb some asks at some point tonight. feel free to send something in (clarify if you want that verse tho obv) if you'd like!!

#—— ✧ ooc » #.tbd. #sorry that my brain immediately shuts down when i try to do starters fdksahsdakhfja #i'll be like 'omg i'm so excited!' and then my brain fizzles out. not an idea in sight. #(btw this is also why you're all HIGHLY encouraged to continue asks whenever you like!!) #anyway my main focus tonight is going to be: asks /in this new verse/ and basic replies because i am. behind. #i wanna touch on the multi but i really think i might just. drop every single old thing and start FRESH fresh. idk. #i think i look at my asks + drafts there and just get /massively/ overwhelmed a lot of the time #anyway anything i write will be queued because i don't like being Perceived on how long it takes me to write One Thing fkdhsasdj

[lingeringscars]

made my brain go brr for a second thinking about mal & nikolai

#me doing this to myself by being sad about 'nikolai not getting turned into a bird' for a second difhgsofgs #and then it spiraled into mal As The Firebird #bird boys #don't perceive me i don't know what is happening in my head #(it going brr as i read about logistic regression that's what) #shadow and bone season 2 spoilers #shadow and bone spoilers #sab spoilers #s&b spoilers #ooc. #tbd. #still awaiting that gifset of them hugging w/o other chars involved tho i am #also alina in the training scene when she talks about needing the cut #they have never looked better than they do in that scene i stand by it

[dutyworn]

also, having some vague anxiety about roleplay in general, and every time i catch myself feeling it and try to delve into it (for context i have a difficult time noticing/feeling my emotions on a regular basis lol) and gently ask myself where it's coming from, why i'm anxious, what about, i kinda come up dry?

#me: notices being anxious and knows its rp related #me at me: ok thats all right. what exactly are you feeling & what about? #me: dial-up noises #idek if it's stress about being slow/inactive #stress about being shitty at moving plot #talking to people ooc on a timely manner? #all of the above? #i know it somehow relates to how i am being perceived #but jesus like #i can barely feel my feelings on a good day #so its just this background ambient anxiety #and when i catch myself feeling it it eludes me #rather than me being able to feel what the emotion actually behind the ambient anxiety is? #negativity cw #; outofarmour

[oldestking]

/  DO correct me if im wrong, but butbu tbut― has Gil in any of his multiple appearances in fate have ever declared himself as a god? like, not in the sense of claiming his divinity, but instead, in the sense of claiming himself as a god in the literal sense? As far as I can recall, I don’t remember him having claimed himself as a god, and if that was to be the case, that would actually be a very interesting thing-

#;ooc #ooc #this wouldn't just be his usual 'i am not going to perceive the gods' & embracing his unique existence but also #i hope this makes sense :thonks: #something related to a political matter as well #g.il and his people (once he returns to u.ruk and performs his role as king) acknowledging his ruling #u see; it wasnt after around 200 years after king naram sin that other rulers self-deified themselves #this self proclaimed deification being a way to consolidate their -oftentimes- unstable ruling to their people #aka; 'I am a god so my power holds weight' #so like;; sort of like an excuse to politically hold themselves stable to put it in very awful condensed manner #bc if kings 'misbehaved' their roles as kings could be taken away #but how would this apply if the king in question was a god? its like a safe barrier in a way #ur honor; my point with all of this is that g.il would not have needed to claim himself as a god to his people #bc not only did his people see him as a ruler after he came back wiser from his journey #but he also saw no necesity to 'shield' himself back under the gods; he is aware of his capacity to rule independently #in conclusion; he would be able to handle himself politically by his actions rather than by putting x and x fronts #anyways if he has; i am not perceiving it because i find this relation more interesting #at least c.aster g.il of course

[watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees]

That number is unreal y'all

I'll soon post the last chapter of Julius and Carter, it's finished, just needs some polishing, and the next one to Capture the moment

Also thanks for the reblogs on my prompts which is where most of this 250 comes from (its insane what the hell)

#thank you #whump community #also just to ramble #a bit #someone whos blog ive admired for like 4 years now referred to me as 'friend' in a comment and it's curing my depression #we have never talked #and its very ooc for me to appreciate being perceived but here i am lol #not whump #a post like this would go on my personal blog but who cares

[hazbinsinners]

// WRITE IT WRITE IT WRITE IT

@themosthatedbeing ‘s mun; you are an amazing writer! Write !

;; GAHHHH GUYS LMAO YOU'RE ALL VERY CUTE AND SWEET I DUNNO MAYBE I WILL !!!!! I GOTTA WORK UP THE BALLS

#;; MY FACE IS RED LMFAO I'M EMBARRASSED I AM BEING PERCEIVED #;; I WAS JUST SHOUTING INTO THE VOID LMAO #;; ooc

[talentforlying]

not my synopsized explanation of the tree ass tattoo breaching containment, of all things. godspeed, my little friend.

#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS. #this isn't a complaint necessarily i am just endlessly fascinated by the things people resonate with when it comes to hellblazer #and the fame of the tree tattoo in particular has Always been hilarious to me #wish there was a button i could hit to auto-repost things to my personal when they escape tho shdks #i've said it before: i adore everyone's passion for this dapper rat man and the strange minutiae of his batshit life #but Please God i can't handle being perceived. i'm not strong enough #at LEAST go hogwild with the photoset of swamp thing growing weed & constantine rolling the Longest joint with it i BEG of you #also shoutout to devilmass bc i can't stop saying 'trass (tree ass)' in my mind sdhjk #singlehandedly altered my brain chemistry

[hyaeth]

i had to share my screen for work and ppl just called out my games on my desktop and my hu tao wallpaper ......... 

#no .... NO !!!!!!!!!!!! #do not PERCEIVE ME !!! #i am an eldritch horror #being from the cosmos #an abyssal creacher #OOC

[souper-power]

ALRIGHT . . . . . . what first now ??? Hot Soup Ocean Or My Special Project Beartrap Suggested . . . . .

》 it had better be the latter . . . . . . . wouldnt you hate to be caught in the act of SOMETHING STUPID ?

#♢the best soupervillain ever!||giovanni potage!♢ #◆one man•no plan!(as usual)◆ #》ooc; i am being perceived !《 #□hmmm...what now?||souper musings□ #》dash commentary《