#AND FIRST TO DIE IN THIS STUPID SHIT SHOW FUCK SHIT AAAAAAA

[miss-menhera]

No one fucking talk to me, I rarely like men at all. I like a fictional man ONCE every blood moon, and in one of those rare instances he DIES. I MEAN DIES??? OF COURSE. YEAH SURE MAKES FUCKING SENSE, LET ME JUST TELL U THE ONLY REASON I WANNA WATCH THIS SHOW NOW IS BECAUSE OF THE HOPE MY ADAM IS GONNA COME BACK. I'm so terribly upset, I legit cried about this for days. I'm not telling this to my therapist, humiliating.

#adam hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #Actually a vent😭 #vent #i swear to fuck I'll lose my shit if PENTIOUS gets killed by holy light and proves himself to be deserving of heaven and ends up there #BUT ADAM WHO TOTALLY DESERVES HELL DOESNT GET TO BE THROWN INTO THOSE FIERY PITS. #vivienne. #VIVIENNE. #IM GONNA BOYCOTT YOUR SHOW IF HE DOESNT COME BACK #i dont caRE WHAT ANYONE SAYS #my little mysoginist </3 #he did nothing wrong #dickmaster #first man ever #AND FIRST TO DIE IN THIS STUPID SHIT SHOW FUCK SHIT AAAAAAA

[depresseddepot]

Okay im adding the rest of my glory liveblogging under the cut so i don't have to keep making more posts lol

God everyone in this show is so fucked up. Yeon jin kissing jae jun SECONDS after he strangled her and also jae jun showing up to father day (or whatever its called, idk i never had those) with do yeong RIGHT THERE AUGSHSJJAJA don't listen to them do yeong i would treat you and your money right

do yeong clearly getting pissed abt the way jae jun talks about dong eun IS SO HOT AND STUPID honey you are an old married man with a 1st grader, is now really the time to be getting jealous about your one sided emotional affair. but also its hot. (whats that phrase? hate to see you go but love to watch you walk away? idk i think this is improper usage) this is now the second "hot old sad married business man that was cheated on but also had his own emotional affair BEFORE he realized he was being cheated on" on my list of rotating men

god GOD WAIT the way all of her bullies are swearing "ill do anything you say. i swear ill follow you until you die" THE METAPHORS. THE METAPHORS OUGHGGHHG

DO YEONG PLAYING VERY LOUD CLASSICAL MUSIC IN HIS CAR SO THAT HIS DAUGHTER DOESN'T HERE HIM CONFRONT JAE JUN. HQGSJSJSJJSS ALL OF THE MEN IN THIS SHOW ARE DIFFERENT KINDS OF FUCKED UP

soft spoken carefully dressed married businessmen aggressively confronting the people bothering their emotional affair-ees (GOD MY TYPE IS SO WEIRD AND UNOBTAINABLE AHGSHZJAKNAS)

nothing and i mean NOTHING will outweigh the fucking ECSTASY i felt watching park dong hoon beat threaten and beat the shit out of that loan shark in my mister. ive got goosebumps just THINKING ABT IT AAAAAAA

sorry my edible just kicked in

do yeong please. i am begging you. just one chance just ONE

man this show is fucked up. the way jae jun doesn't seem like a terrible awful person at first bc you don't see him physical abuse dong eun but then you watch his character reveal more and more how fucked up he really is and it just shows how men like that never really grow out of it unless they're fucking called out on it

Oh dong eun. honey i am holding you (a woman capable of murder) so gently in my hands. they're all fucked up but jae jun and yeon jin in particular and the way they look at you (the camera) hits a little too close to home

God it is so hard to type under the influence i get so stupidly dizzy

i wonder if do yeong is going to be angrier with dong eun for using him or his wife for lying and cheating? Bc every time I think he's clearly over dong eun he says something that makes me think he intends to defend her or something

noooooo old man stay loyal to your emotional affair 🤡

I CAN BARELY TYPE THIS IK SO EXCITED. YEO JEONG AND DO YEONG IN THE SAME ROOM. EVIL DOCTOR MEETS SAD LONELY BUSINESSMAN

"you need to get up close and personal so you feel it as you go in" i have been so horribly obsessed with love for so long that my taste in men has soured. what is it about these crazy dangerous MANIACS THAT HAS ME SO PUFFED UP. KÖNIG AND GHOST AND NOW YEO JEONG. god the barely contained unhinged violence in his eyes. also is his meeting w do yeong genuinely like an accident??

oh my god. oh my god. YEO JEONG HAS SEEN DONG EUNS ROOM WITH ALL THE PICTYRESWTAPED TO THE WALL AND HE WAS LIKE "yeah okay. secretly i like this and also sure lets have casual domestic hang outs while we talk about damning the people from your past"

THE MEETING WAS ORCHESTRATED. HE'S PLAYING HIS PART AS A PAWN SO EAGERLY "i was annoyed he was cooler than me" sorry. id like to be sandwiched inbetween you two and also dong eun

do yeong is so easily convinced when a pretty slightly dangerous woman looks threateningly in his eyes without wavering AT ALL

yeo jeong, uncomfortable at the sudden mention of illegal violet child abuse: so. uh. how frequently do you wash your sheets

HAGAJJSJABABA ALSO YEO JEONG after being prompted abt his murdery daydreams from a girl planning on being a murderer (i assume): um. can i persuade you to ask me something else?

Also dong eun the whole show is like " 👁👁 "

IM SORRY. THE MAN WHO MURDERED YEO JEONGS DAD WROTE HIM LETTERS DESCRIBING THE MURDER FOR LITERALLY THAT WHOLE TIME

"so your poor son went to hell after all, huh?"

WAIT DONG EUN IS TRIGGERED BY THE SOUND OF SIZZLING AND THAT SOUND RELAXES YEO JEONG. THE METAPHORSSSS

dong eun living literally across the street from yeon jin will also never not be funny

YEON JIN FINDING DONG EUNS ROOM WHILE THE HEAVY METAL PLAYS. YESSSSSS

OH LORD THE HEAVY METAL WHILE YEO JEONG WALKS THREATINGLY INTO A MORGUE. GOD HELP ME. THE GLOVES. also something about a doctor being in the hospital they work at in casual clothes. hot

yeo jeong i would die for you. and i think you would end up being the cause

DO YEONG IN DONG EUNS BEDROOM?????? Oh the parallels

IS THAT THE ENDING

THATS IT????????????????????????????? NO BABY I NEED MORE RIGHT NOW

part 2 coming march 2023. O have to stay alive until march 2023

NOOOOOO IT CAN'T BE OVER I WAS JUST GETTING SO FUCKING EXCITED

noooooo NOOOOO ugh. god damn it how am i supposed to know if do yeong is there to confront his wife or if he's there to protect her!!!!!! NOOO I NEED TO KNOW HOW MURDERY YEO JEONG IS

Edit literally 2 hours later: bro I CANNOT stop thinking about yeo jeong. I have a huge fucking problem. whats that post thats category 5 autism event or something bc i am going through it

I NEED MORE. I NEED MORE RIGHT NOW

something about yeo jeong drives me fucking crazy bro i cant stop thinking about the scene with him gently skimming his fingertips over his scalpels as they slowly get bigger and turn into knives of more and more lethality

The way he described stabbing someone to do yeong. good god these insane men are making ME INSANE TOO

god. christ. i can't handle it. hes so sweet looking but the way the actor immediately shifts into the dead eyed dangerous side of him was so masterfully done

oughghhhh i have to rewatch it RIGHT NOW OR ILL DIE I THINK

#spoilers #the glory spoilers

[phoebehalliwell]

what are your thoughts on thruples? cause I keep thinking about Paige/Henry/Coop, especially with Henry and Coop's epic bromance in the comics

ooh that could be very interesting. personally, i'm game for throuples (tho i will say i Hate the word throuple i think it sounds gross just like you know moist or something so i usually just say "poly relationship") but i do kind have beef when it's like. like you know the meme "it doesn't have to be like this [blank] has two hands"? funny meme i do like it but i hate when a poly relationship is just kinda an excuse to merge two couples rather than something that like emerges as distinct relationships between all three parties. like bella edward and jacob as a couple like. shure because bella loves edward and bella loves jacob but jacob and edward really don't like have anything there it's more like roommates who share a girlfriend rather than a poly relationship. one piece of media that i think really did it well was siren on freeform which i highly recommend the first two seasons it kinda goes off the rails s3 and then was cancelled but the first two season it really spends time fleshing out all aspects of the relationships between ben, ryn, & maddie and it also actually goes canon which is lit 🤙🤙

but basically. if i were to do a paige/henry/coop, i think i would start with specifically a paige/coop bromance introduce henry into the mix & let it blossom from there so like. as previously stated. i think each leg of the triangle here needs to be strong n steady on its own so um underneath the cut is i believe a record breaking 6.6k

rip richard but we'll say richard also died in this au rip. and then, of course, kyle also died. idk if he's a whitelighter or not but the point is paige has this weight on her chest like god i can't save these people i can't save the people i love ouch everything hurts

& that's when coop shows up!

and we'll have his introduction plot be a fusion of heartbreak city and the magic hour where coop's got this relationship and it's perfect they're so in love but there's this demonic interference and it's gonna kill one or both of them so he busts down the charmed ones' door like hi you guys are protectors of the innocent right well i have some innocents in dire need of protection

to which this duty gets turfed to paige because piper idk has work and phoebe has a date and phoebe's like i can cancel it to help! and coop's like what no the whole reason i'm here is love go go find love paige can totally handle this

and paige is like :| because she really doesn't want this gig and coop's explaining it all to her how this love is going to be broken up by a magical death unless they stop it and paige is like okay look here coop let's not get our expectations up to high because in my experience almost all relationships end in a magical death and coop’s like !!!

and immediately does like a cupid reading on her and paige is trying to bat him away like ew no i do not need any love guru-ing right now okay let’s just fix your thing and then you can leave okay

and coop’s like no don’t you see? this is fate, the fact that it’s you and me on this, it means i’m meant to be here, i’m meant to help you find love

and paige is like uh no it means piper’s a mother of two and phoebe’s on a date while i am the tragic spinstress of magic school (which is still under her charge just bc it is we didn’t abandon it)

and coop’s like nope. it’s fate. and paige rolls her eyes and coop’s like come on, like you don’t believe in fate and paige is like actually i don’t! and coop just smiles at her bc he knows she’s lying and paige knows she knows he’s lying and she tries to sneer at him but it’s just insanely half hearted bc to be honest her heart kinda skipped a beat with that smile but no

absolutely not

dude, all she gets is cursed love, and now a cupid?

she can’t go through all that she can’t fight for love only to watch him die no she’s gonna ignore it he’s not that cute anyways oh fuck he totally is but whatever!!! doesn’t matter

so blah blah blah paige and coop save the day including one moment where idk there’s an explosion or something they have to dodge something hide for attackers something where they get thrown up against a wall faces inches apart from each other breathing heavy undeniably a moment which they both Immediately break because wooooah that is a little too much chemistry!! better act like that never happened

and you know next episode or whatever coop’s like okay let’s find you love!! and paige is like not now i’m at work and coop’s like in an alleyway and paige is like i need to look after my charge and then after that i need to grade papers and after that i need to order cauldrons and after that-

and coop’s like find love?

and paige is like no. i need to.... but um she forgot the rest of her list

and coop’s like find love excellent sounds great!

and paige is like anyone ever tell you you’re really annoying and coop’s like nope i’m a cupid :0)

and blah blah blah they’re arguing and something something w paige’s charge and paige is like i gotta go talk to him but coop holds her back because wait who’s that approaching him and paige is like fuck that must be his parole officer bc idk he’s doing something that is obviously breaking parole and paige is like aaaaaaa what do we do and then it’s a henry face reveal and both paige and coop are like woah.

but then paige is storming off trying to like try to fight henry and henry’s like what the fuck is this?? and coop’s running up like hi i’m also here and speed’s like i-cannot stress this enough-do not know any of these people and coop’s like you don’t know us yet and paige is like you can’t do this speed’s a good kid and speed’s like yeah!!

and henry’s like he was so very obviously breaking parole and paige is like he’s a kid and henry’s like a kid who’s been to juvie!! twice!!! and who should know the damn rules by now

and paige is like look something something clever talk bargaining whatever puts something of her own at stake and henry’s like you’re really gonna risk it all on this kid and paige is like yes. he’s destined for greatness. and speed is like yeah!! and henry’s like fine. whatever. but when the other shoe drops, you know like i’m gonna cash in whatever wager paige made here

& he leaves

and speed’s like thanks also who are you and idk we get a paige monologue something full of love and spirit and coop’s also there still and speed’s listening to this monologue kinda like um okay bc honestly? just met her five minutes ago this is kind of a lot but coop’s listening to this monologue like wow😍

so idk speed leaves and coop’s like hey so do you pick a fight with all the guy’s you find attractive and paige is like what

and coop’s like well i’m just saying you know with richard with kyle with me and now with henry i’m kinda sensing a pattern there

and paige is like did you just include yourself on that list and coop’s like i mean yeah duh

and paige kinda wants to argue back but her blush is giving her away so it’s best just to change the subject so what you think i should be going for the parole officer?

and coop’s like yes! didn’t you feel it there was a spark there passion energy something that with the help of yours truly can easily turn into love and paige is like yeah no. absolutely not.

and coop’s like come on why not he was hot and paige is like yeah well if he’s so hot why don’t you date him and coop pauses like hmm like genuinely consider and paige is like don’t do that

and coop’s like why not and paige is torn between don’t date him because i actually did feel that spark and i do kinda like him and also don’t date him because if you’re gonna date anyone it should be me but both those are too embarrassing to say out loud to her cupid so instead she just says conflict of interest

and we flash forward to later idk when the point is speed is doing graffiti on public property but not just like stupid pointing a spray can at something la la la like proper graffiti like an artform but as it is unfortunately public property that is Illegal so it breaks parole

so idk henry’s there and busts him and paige senses speed’s in trouble so she shows up and henry’s like good you’re here. i’m not actually gonna cash in the thing that you wagered because that’d be unfair, because i know the kid, i know that he always let’s you down and speed’s like hey man

but paige is looking up at the wall and she’s like don’t you get it and henry’s like ...no and paige is like it’s art. it’s a release, it’s a coping mechanism and speed’s like idk that’s all sounding a little bit pretentious for a bit of graffiti and paige is like you can’t arrest him for this and henry’s like it’s literally illegal. & i already let him walk once what part of this aren’t you getting

and then there’s like a. idk cop radio thing i don’t know how police work that’s talking about how whatever gang speed used to run with just robbed some place but they’re hot on their tail bc their getaway driver sucks and henry’s looking at speed bc speed Is the getaway driver hence the name and henry’s like how come you aren’t driving that car huh

and speed just shrugs and henry’s like no how come you’re not driving that car what you swap out one crime for another you’re getting busted either way and speed like shrugs 

and paige is like he’s creating art instead and henry’s like did they approach you to drive the getaway car and speed shrugs and henry’s did they approach you to drive the getaway car and speeds like yes man they did i said no and henry looks up at the art

and it’s some super nail on the head craving freedom thing a bird breaking free from a cage type shit and it’s gorgeous

and henry looks at paige like what are you, huh

and paige is like freelance guardian angel

and henry just uncuffs speed and speed’s like what are you doing and henry’s like go. next time you do this find a wall that isn’t public property

and speed can’t help it he kinda smiles n runs off and henry just looks at paige bc what the hell has this girl gotten into him bc normally he’s just got such a concrete shell but she’s smiling at him like he just made the right choice and he’s really gotta fight the urge to smile back. what the fuck

so he says something stupid and leaves

and later paige is doing something when boom coop is here invading her personal bubble bc that’s become their new mode of communication is there are one thousand empty chairs and coop is seated in one paige will walk over and sit on that same chair that’s how they operate bc again there’s this sense of longing for one another and they both know they can’t go for it so instead they just opt for this intense intimacy passed off as friendship

and paige is like met the parole officer again and coop’s like oh henry mitchell? and paige is like how do u know his full name and coop’s like did my research<3 and they’re talking blah blah blah idk and it’s both how to land a date with this guy and also heavy flirting at the same time. and then like phoebe walks into the room and they snap apart like magnets with the same polarity i think?? been a while since the fifth grade and their language just becomes so much more stifled

to which phoebe is vaguely aware and this is a change but we as the audience are super aware it’s a change meaning that their constant flirty banter is a choice on both parts they are both very consciously doing this

and then i don’t know there’s something bigger going on in the main plot which has been building and the main villain needs something magical from each type of being so a cupid’s next on the grocery list so idk coop is either out minding his own business getting coffee or he’s out on reconnaissance on henry when all of a sudden he’s attacked!! by idk an arrow seems convenient honestly we should do a bow and arrow an homage to in original cupid iconography

and henry’s in proximity and sees this and idk maybe they’re somewhere where there aren’t that many people just so you know u can be attacked by a bow and arrow and henry’s like what the fuck!??!?! running over to help him and he vague recognizes him as the angel’s friend but is mainly like holy shit did you just get shot with a bow and arrow and henry’s like i’ll call an ambulance i’ll drive u to the hospital

and coop’s like no no uhh can’t go with the whole i am actually a magical being i exist in no databases and also have no money so instead goes with the i have no health insurance and henry’s like hmm. fuck.

so the next thing you know coop’s on henry’s couch and henry’s doing rudimentary first aid and coop’s really trying to hobble away because if he can just get to paige she can heal this because she unlocked that power in like s5 or s6 in a more natural progression but henry’s not letting him leave because dude you have an arrow in your chest

and now we’re doing the hurt comfort schtick with the meaningful glances and also coop is shirtless bc well you know Arrow In Chest and he’s also in henry’s apartment which is offering a very weird sense of intimacy

and there’s also this kind of banter going because coop’s like no i’m fine i can leave this is fine and henry’s like dude. please let me at least try to help you and after that you can walk right out of here and go repuncture your lung. but just. while you’re. let me do what i can

and coop’s like okay because like. well i mean a) gotta keep up appearances like he’s mortal and b) henry’s kinda fine so sure he can play doctor what’s the worse that can happen

and henry’s like okay we gotta get this arrow out of you so um. any ideas on how to do that? and coops like yeah break off the feathered part and then pull the rest through

and henry’s just like yeah? you have experience with this? and coop’s like once or twice and henry’s like what do you do?

and coop’s like ... relationship therapist

and henry’s like are relationship therapists frequently attacked by archers and coop’s like yeah more often than you’d think 

and henry removed the arrow and the actual point stabby bit of the arrow is shaped like a heart just for funsies bc it’s for cupids but henry’s looking at this like relationship therapist hunting arrow??

anyways. henry is pressing some bandages against coop’s chest to staunch the bleeding and there’s a Moment there to which henry kinda falters because woah gay thoughts?? and the pressure lightens but then o shit i’m lightening the pressure don’t do that!! so he pushes hard and coop’s like aa!! and henry’s like fuck jesus and coop just kinda laughs like i guess you don’t patch up arrow wounds that frequently and henry’s like yeah actually you’re my first!!

something something something coop’s patched up and henry gives him once of his shirts because coop’s shirt had to be cut off him bc of the arrow and we get one of the classic how to i look / starstruck moments because hell yeah we do

and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah coop makes it home and paige is like where in god’s name did u get that shirt bc it looks nothing like what coop would wear in fact in kinda reminds her of

believe it or not, henry

hot parole officer henry?

the one and only

and paige is like you slept with him??? and coop’s like close. i was shot with an arrow and he patched me up

and paige is like !!! because you know main plot evil all this that coop takes off henry’s shirt so paige can see the wound and heal it and she’s looking at henry’s handiwork and it really is the old college try but that man is not a medic so now paige is laying her hand on coop’s bare chest and phoebe walks in and immediately turns on a heel like i’ll give you guys some space!!

and paige is like no it’s fine i’m healing him he was shot main plot and phoebe’s like oh

and then later phoebe’s talking with paige like okay you and coop tho. bc like. ik ik healing or whatever. but like. 👀👀.

and tbh paige has been waiting for this because she really needs to unpack bc like i know!! because coop and i have this thing and it’s a great thing but it like can’t be a thing it’s a forbidden thing but i want it to be a thing but at the same time there’s this other guy and i can’t get him off my mind and i’m worried i’m just viewing him as a safer alternative instead of coop but like. idk he was just my backup i feel like i would be more lukewarm about it. but i’m not. like. i’m really not i kind wish i was because i don’t know if i can do a relationship again especially because he’s mortal like i can’t have someone i care for die again so maybe it’s safer just to keep what i have with coop or maybe even to explore that further? and keep henry safe? but like this and that and this and that

and phoebe’s like buzzing because it’s been a while since she’s had such an interesting love mess to tinker with so the first thing she does is go to coop just to see what she can sus out there Meanwhile paige is with speed where you ask? p3. well, outside of it

speed is painting the side of the club with this amazing artwork and clearly there’s this vein of magic running through it with certain symbols all that and he’s using paintcans and paige has her paintbrush and is adding smaller pieces as well

and she’s like hey where’d you get like that idea or thing idea because they’re all like. runes or magical somethings or others and speeds like idk. saw it in a dream maybe.

and henry rolls up because he stopped at the manor looking for paige and piper directed him here and he’s just like. like he sees this amazing work and it’s a big heart full moment and paige and speed finish up and speed adds his little signature at the bottom and leaves and henry says he’s proud of him and speed acts like he doesn’t care but he does

so henry’s like hey how’s your friend and paige is like coop? yeah, no he’s totally fine and henry’s like really???

and paige is like yeah no um. my brother in law! is an army medic. so um. he was able to. yeah : ) which isn’t technically a lie because leo was he’s just also kinda frozen in a block of ice now so whoops

and henry’s like that’s good but the real reason he’s her it to like thank paige for you know like. seeing the light like maybe henry has become too bitter and jaded so it’s good to know that there are freelance guardian angels out there keeping the balance and you know watching out for these kids so thank you for just like. being a good person.

and he also looks at her art and he’s like this your coping mechanism and paige is like yeah [tragic backstory swap time!!] and both paige and henry kinda realize how they’re like almost mirrors to each other and henry kisses her and paige kisses him back but then stops because she likes him too much which means he’s gonna die

so she’s like sry i gotta go and henry’s like oh :\ because um. well. whoops. because like. god he so rarely goes out on a limb like that and for one moment there it felt like it was all gonna align like he wasn’t gonna get ditched but paige’s green punchbuggy is already peeling out of the lot so guess not

so phoebe’s determined that coop is indeed in love with paige so all that needs is a little nudging okay she’s on mission time to go

and then next thing you know paige is storming in all in a tizzy because she kissed henry and coop’s like this is great news and paige is like no this is bad news! and coop’s like ???

and paige is like no you don’t understand it’s like i’m cursed because whenever i love someone whenever i truly love someone they die and that kiss....... it was..... i can’t have henry die

and coop is like on full cupid mode idk a cupid monologue blah blah blah love <3 and it kind of heals paige both in a sense that it quells her worries but also in a sense that being around coop always seems to make her feel better like she just feels warmer feels safer when he’s around so um. she should probably. figure something out about that. esp in regards to henry. right?

anyways. coop for some reason or another runs into henry again (call it fate) and henry’s like hey r u okay? and coop’s like yeah : ) ! and thank you, by the way, for um patching me up and stuff and henry’s like yeah no problem but um look can i ask you a favor and coop’s like sure

and henry’s like you’re a relationship therapist right and coop’s like yeah 99% sure he knows where this is going and henry’s like like family and relationship counselling and coop’s now only like 40% sure he knows where this is going and he’s like sure and henry’s like great okay so um i’ve got this parolee who [plot background story idk there needs to be some familial healing something or other] is there like. anyway you can help out with that

and coop’s like totally!! and henry’s like oh thank god because like. therapy expensive.

and now we get another one of those moments like seeing someone in their element henry sees coop as he goes basically full cupid but rather than romantic love it’s familial and henry’s like in awe and he’s also kind like wow okay i’d totally make out with that guy like right now but like. like he just kissed paige. and he knows coop and paige are friends. so like. like he can’t do that right? is that too weird?

so family therapy a success and like as established forging bonds of love strengthens cupids so coop’s like word you know if you ever need this on a more regular basis and henry’s like i promise you’re gonna regret offering that and coop’s like not a chance and henry’s like i really have like nothing to pay you with and coop’s like you make these kids lives better. i don’t need payment and henry looks over and gets is Own aha moment of oh i do have a purpose and also i love my job type thing

but. there is another task at hand. because like. are you and paige?? like??

and coop’s like me and paige??? and he’s about to say no because no they’re not but now he’s thinking about it and they are kinda more than they are not but henry’s not asking about the minutiae of it so now henry’s just watching him go on this face journey before going why do you ask : ) and henry’s like no nothing i just thought like well i don’t know what i thought

and coop’s like haha yeah well you know it’s um. haha yeah! you know how it is. i mean. paige is amazing and henry’s like yeah she really is and coop’s like yeah and like she’s just got all this love in her heart and henry’s like i know!! and she’s so smart like you should see what she’s done with speed she got him this place where he can put up his own art and like blah blah blah and at this point it is just coop and henry praising paige to each other for about five minutes before they kinda realize what’s going on and they’re like hmm. well this is kinda weird. cuz now we both kinda sound in love with her.

and coop’s like listen. i know paige really likes you. like a lot

and henry’s like woah i’m gonna stop you there because um. like. i mean i don’t wanna sound weird but like. like we did kiss and then she kinda just ran off and i mean literally ran hopped into her car drove away type thing so. i don’t really think so. so :\

and coop’s like no i mean like okay yeah that did happen but dude you’ve gotta understand she’s had so much loss and henry’s like no i know she told be about her parents and coop’s voice gets real low leans in because this is Top Secret information and he’s like it goes beyond that and henry’s like what and coop’s like her past two boyfriends both died. one from a heart attack, the other was hit by a car (well, no richard was not hit by a car but when all the magic inside you fucks you up that bad evidently the wreck that’s left kinda looks like you were hit by a semi. ouch) and coop’s like so paige kinda just. thinks she’s cursed.

and henry’s like oh. because my god. that’s a lot to process. and that like. like makes so much sense because like if that happened to him he really wouldn’t be able to date again hell that did not happen to him and he’s already barely able to date bc of how afraid he is of getting hurt

but coop’s out here like henry it’s not you like i promise she really likes you i mean you’re a good man and you’re brave and you’re passionate and like you’re hot, obviously and coop theoretically starts complimenting henry from paige’s point of view but then it very clearly starts to dissolve into coop’s pov and we’re still riding that chemical high of the In Your Element passion henry has for coop added onto the good person bonus of yes i’ll continue to help you with this endeavor for literally no benefit and now he’s just rattling off compliments to henry and henry’s just like oh jeez 😳😳🥰

and there’s just like. the briefest moment of henry’s eyes darting down to coop’s lips and coop’s daze is kinda broken and he realizes that he’s just been telling henry how foioine he is to his face and there’s a moment spellbound lookin into each others eyes like damn this is kinda gay & then they’re making out

and then henry’s like ohhh my god what am i doing what have i done oh know because you’re paige’s friend you like paige and i kissed her earlier today and now i’m oh my god this is a bad idea right? this is a bad idea?

and coop’s thinking on it because like okay he has been trying to pair paige and henry together a) because they’d be cute together and she clearly likes him but also b) because he really likes her and he can’t be with her bc he’s a cupid so at least if she’s with someone else who she loves he can be happy knowing she’s happy. but now he’s here with henry and he shouldn’t be because Again he’s trying to pair paige with henry and he can’t be with henry bc as previously stated cupids can’t actually have relationships but he shouldn’t even be thinking that because henry isn’t for him but even if he was which he isn’t it wouldn’t work because he’s a cupid so um. yeah. this is a bad idea

yeah

yeah

no they’re makin out again.

anyways. l8r at p3 someone else who owns a local business sees the art on the wall outside and is like yo who did that because i would totally pay them to do idk my food truck or something and piper’s like i’ll tell u exactly who did that

so idk i think legally since speed’s a minor and a parolee henry has to be involved in the job getting process actually wait speed just turned 18. idk what any of this means but we’ll say henry needs to be there so piper gave paige the food truck guys digits and paige passes on the news to speed and henry and like. paige shows up at henry’s office to be like good news!!

and to level with you henry thought that like. after making out with coop maybe his feeling for paige would dissipate like maybe he was secretly gay this whole time and paige was just a safe route to project those feeling but paige comes in with this smile that puts the goddamn stars to shame and henry’s like nope!! still in love with her!!

and paige is like okay because like this is all set you know like this could even lead to a career in art for speed like and henry’s like yes absolutely but now that the initial glow of that has worn off they’re both kinda remembering that the last time they saw each other they kissed and then paige bolted so yeah they should probably address that

and paige is like look i want to apologize for just kind of. running out the other day. that really wasn’t. it wasn’t right and i know this sounds dumb but it really wasn’t about you i’m just i’ve been in this weird place and i do like you henry like i really do so i don’t want you to think 

and henry’s like i feel like i kind of apologize too because i kinda made out with your friend and paige pauses because like she really has no friends well i guess besides coop but like there’s and henry tacks on coop to clarify and paige just snorts laughing

like she has no idea why that’s so funny but it just kinda is like. what!!

and henry’s like yeah but it was like. it’s. he really likes you paige he really does care for you i mean i really care for you too and henry’s kind of playing both sides here because he does like. really like paige. and that’s why he wants her to be happy and it’s her choice who she feels who she’d be most happy with whether that’s hm or coop because honestly coop is p amazing henry wouldn’t be burnt losing to him because coop is a great guy and paige is just watching him ramble smiling and henry realizes he doesn’t know what he’s saying anymore so he just kind of trails off and gets kind of lost in paige’s smile because like. wow : )

and paige is just kind of there processing that information because um wow who could have seen this coming and honestly she’s still not over coop kissing henry that’s just so unbelievable entertaining to her she’s so gonna hafta prod coop about it later because dude what?? what? bro. bro. bro. like. like the two guys she’s in love with kissed like bro what!!!! lmao she would pay money to see that how tf did that happen. she would have loved to have been there. that’s insane. she really wished she was there. like. really wished she was there. hmm. should she stew on that a little more?

and henry’s like. this is awkward. i’m sorry. i don’t want things to be weird between us. and paige is like henry i think things have been weird between us since i first picked an argument with you in an alleyway. and henry’s like true!! and they’re laughing and there’s a beat and henry’s like i think i fell in love with you in that moment. and paige is like yeah?

and henry’s just. i mean like. look at her <3 but like. she deserves. like she deserves the best there is and he’s just some guy like some jaded hardass who lives in a crappy apartment and who always forgets how to do the right thing it seems not to mention all his fucking baggage like. she deserves better. 

and paige sees him kinda retreat and like she kind of pulls out of the moment too because she loves henry she does but like that fear that he’s gonna die is still there and she wants to fight it she just doesn’t know if she can but like. she really really does like him.

and now they’re both standing there again another moment turned to dust in the wind now they’re just two people standing there incredibly normal about it yep just two people nope paige is kissing henry ope okay yep they’re making out and boom someone’s knocking on henry’s office door o quick act natural because hi henry heard you needed like the legal paperwork because speed’s getting a job here you go and henry’s like 👍 thank you very obviously flushed and his coworker is like. what the fuck is going on in that office. but like. doesn’t really care enough to find the answer to that question.

so paige is like you should come to p3 l8r tonight to like celebrate speed getting a job blah blah blah blah and henry’s like i will be there

so later paige is getting dolled up in a fire outfit just adding the final touches when coop shows up bc phoebe said you needed to see me? (with phoebe’s strategy fully being in mind that paige looks hella fly right now but also is still in the manor an area paige and coop have kind of curated as their space also like once she goes to p3 it’s simply too loud too crowded to have a heart to heart like what is about to happen here which she would listen all unfold but piper unfortunately dragged her away to help with the boys but i’m sure it’s all going well)

and paige is like ....nope. and coop’s like ah. well. you look great. going to see henry? which he asks that question like he’s walking on very thin ice and paige is like yeah and i gotta say i can’t believe you kissed henry before you ever kissed me and coop just laughs like well!!

and paige is laughing too but there’s this undercurrent of you still haven’t kissed me :/ and coop’s like i take it henry told you and paige is like yep. and then made a very convincing campaign in your favor on how you’re evidently in love with me and you’re probably my better option, he loves me, too, but just can’t seem to hold a candle to you

and coop’s laughing and he’s like that sounds like something henry’d say, he’s really. he’s got a lot of love he just doesn’t seem to think he’s worth it.

and paige is like you think he’s worth it though

and coop’s like i do. you think he’s worth it too. and paige is like i do.

and there’s a moment of stillness because what the fuck are any of them doing and paige is like we can’t keep doing this. and coop’s like gonna hafta be a bit more specific there because i think i’ve broken more rules than i can count in the past 24 hours. and paige is wanna make that one more and coop’s like !? and then paige kisses him and coop’s like okay now’s the time where i would really love some clarification

and paige is like. well. i had to kiss you, right? and coop’s like sure? and paige is like because i’ve wanted to for the longest time because i keep pretending like i’m not in love with you because well you know you know me better than almost anyone else but like. i also love henry. and so i had to kiss you. as a test.

and coop’s like ...did i pass?

and paige is like that wasn’t the test and coop’s like what was and paige is like i don’t know. to see where my love is. to see if i love you or if i love henry or if it’s all just infatuation and relfections distorting how i feel and coop’s like okay. so... what’s the answer?

and paige is like i love henry. but then she kisses coop again and is like but i think i love you, too. and they’re doing that thing where they lack bubble space when they talk i mean paige’s head is basically on his chest and coop’s hands are on her waist and coop’s like okay. so where do you want to go from here.

because he’s a cupid you know his top priority is love in its purest form so if like paige’s love for henry like outweighs her love for him he will pretend not to be crushed and move on like he will. he’s saying he’ll do anything in the name of love but really he’ll just do anything for paige.

and paige is like i think you should kiss henry again and coop laughs and he’s like don’t joke about that because complete candor i totally would he is... amazing

and paige is like yeah, i know, and i’m not joking and it kind of clicks for coop like !! polyromanticism!!

anyways. paige And coop go to p3 and henry’s there and sees paige And coop and he’s like uh oh oh no because if paige chose coop like he’s happy for them he really is except he’s also kind of not because then he kind of loses paige And coop and um. that’s kind of a two hit KO. but wait!! that is not the case! what’s this??

anyways. quirky hijinks of sorts when phoebe sees that paige came home with henry and she’s like damn. my plan failed. and the next morning piper’s like i see ur plan worked and phoebe’s like yeah no need to rub it in and piper’s like ??? dude paige totally hooked up with coop last night and phoebe’s like no?? that was the other guy that was henry

and piper’s like that was definitely coop?? and phoebe’s like piper not every tall man with dark hair looks the same and piper’s like no shit do you think i don’t know what coop looks like he practically lives here and phoebe’s like yeah that’s how i know the guy paige brought home w her was Not Coop and piper’s like do you need new glasses and phoebe’s like shut up i’m right and piper’s like no ur not!!

and later that day they’re like. all brewing a potion in the attic and like while we have you here...... did you hook up with henry or coop last night and phoebe’s like because piper thought it was coop when i very clearly saw henry and piper’s like yeah phoebe hasn’t been sleeping well lately i think she’s started seeing things so go ahead prove me right and paige is just laughing like okay so i guess i gotta introduce u guys to my 2 boyfriends

#it's bi4bi4bi #this was really fun tho i never would have thot of this but this is fun #charmed #paige x coop x henry #💌 #margaretsminiessays #more like margarets major fuckin essays tho #there's. there's a lot here. but it needs to be said!!

[uniformbravo]

a bunch of winter 2020 anime first impressions from Me

Koisuru Asteroid / Asteroid In Love

ok ive already professed my love for this one so i wont get too much into it but basically it’s Extremely cute & im way invested in the two (HOPEFULLY romantic) leads bc their relationship is so sweet so far aaaaaaa

like do u SEE this shit im actually tearing up hgnfhrognfghdjfnjg

this show is Pretty and Cute and Space-Themed and Probably Gay what more do u Need. i love it 10/10

Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken!

so fucken good, this is the one i was most excited for based purely on the art style/animation and god did it deliver, everything is such a treat to look at i fuckin LOVE a setting w/ just as much personality as the characters

and My Goodness the Characters, 3 distinct girls w/ strong designs & personalities that aren’t like super moe/catered to cishet dudes heLLO

we Love a gremlin protag & her chaotic neutral best friend & the “fuck you dad i want to make anime” dreamer they meet........

also HELL YEAH it’s about making anime and they don’t even use that as a gimmicky set piece, the art is a huge part of the story and the detail with which it’s explored in the first ep gives me high hopes for the rest of the show aaaaa so excited to see where this one goes after that BANGER of a first episode

Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun

switching gears to a less great one lol..... so the thing is this show’s visual aesthetic absolutely fucking slaps in a way that’s so rare to see in a sea of samey anime art styles, like the character designs are unique and everything is so damn colorful, the backgrounds alone blow me away w/ how fuckin Pretty they are??? LOOK at this shit

and just. this show has a lot of stylistic flourishes that make it like 100/100 Certified Good-To-Look-At Anime

which makes every other aspect of the show that much more disappointing lmaoooo like ok i can deal w/ a mediocre story if the visuals slap, which they Do, but also these characters look 10 & we’re doing the whole sexualizing minors thing which fucking BLOWS it’s so uncomfortable to watch........... i feel like it’s one of those things where they’re trying to justify it by being like “o well hanako’s like a thousand year old spirit or whatever so he’s not REALLY underage” but fuckin. fuck off he looks and sounds like a Young Boy yall know what ur doing ugh

it’s not a thing that happens Constantly throughout the episode, really just a few moments here and there, but it is in the op pretty prominently so i feel like it’s gonna be a Thing that keeps happening so idk if i’ll stick w/ this one in particular which is a Damn Shame bc it really is such a gorgeous looking show im mad

number24

ok ngl just from the character designs alone i rly didn’t think this one was gonna make as good a first impression as it did??? i guess the huge ensemble cast of pretty boys reminded me of last season’s actors: songs connection, which uh. was Not great,

so i went into it totally expecting it to be all shitty but it rly surprised me, i found it so intriguing? the characters are actually really endearing so far...... i love how it doesn’t try to shove the entire cast in our faces in the v first ep but instead starts out w/ a small handful and lets us spend a lil time w/ them while only giving assorted Hints and passing impressions of the others, that was nice

also love how very not “generic sports anime” it is right off the bat by dropping us right into the middle of these characters’ story instead of doing the whole “bright-eyed first year joins the team and fights his way to the top” sorta deal- which you’d think would be a confusing and awkwardly paced approach but in this case is handled surprisingly well, especially because it seems like it’s gonna have a lot more elements of a character drama than a straight up classic sports anime (which i am Super here for)

(there is a lot of rugby in the op though so we’ll see how things go, it’s only been 1 ep after all)

the air drop into the characters’ established lives makes introductions a lot more organic as well; since the characters are already familiar with each other we don’t have to sit around watching everyone introduce themselves to the protag, we get to infer their relationships and general opinions of each other through their various interactions & it’s a thousand times more engaging imo!!

i mean we do have this other first year joining as a manager and our protag did deliberately say he learned everyone’s names/info after deciding to become a manager so im sure we’ll be getting those character introductions anyway, but well. we’ll cross that bridge if/when we come to it

also i believe this takes place in college rather than high school?? i couldn’t pay attention to every detail but i definitely got that kind of vibe in which case Hell Yeah another welcome deviation from the norm babeeyyyy (i just checked and it Is college yeehaw)

basically what im saying is im tired of tropes & number24 just no clipped past the first 25 chapters of the sports anime formula and also it’s set in university AND it seems to be character-driven & im living thanks thank u

Pet

ok ill be honest i completely forgot that i watched this one lmaooo (which should give u a hint as to what i thought of it *thinking emoji*)

the art style’s whatever and the animation’s whatever, nothing special there. the show is like, dark?? more stupid than dark idk it feels a little bit “welcome to my twisted mind” but the twist is homophobia w/ a mild side of ableism, and also an entire episode of suspense wondering if im gonna have to watch this black side character die (he doesn’t, so there’s that at least)

honestly i cant even remember what drew me to this show enough to put it in my plan to watch, i guess the premise sounded interesting enough (something about controlling minds and erasing memories?), but mature psychological shows usually aren’t really my scene, especially when they’re executed.... Like That. i did kind of enjoy the twist at the end, mildly, though i feel like it was pretty obvious in hindsight and the only reason i didn’t see it coming is bc i can be astoundingly shortsighted when it comes to things like that (aka im DUMB)

since it took until the very end of the episode to Really introduce our dynamic duo tho, i feel like this ep was more of a prologue than anything and the Real show is gonna begin in ep 2, which is great n all but uh. idk if i care enough to give that a watch tbhhhh. i might just to see what the show has to offer but really truly honestly cant see myself sticking this one thru to the end lmao rip

--

hate to end on a bummer note like that but hey that’s all i got for this post ! i have more shit to watch so i’ll probably end up making like a part 2 w/ more impressions but this is getting long enough that it’s becoming kind of a pain to keep adding more so thats it for now boiyoeiyeoii

#i kept wanting to talk abt my thoughts & figured this format would be more efficient than making a bunch of scattered text posts #also this way i get to include pictures to help identify each show #which is a lot more fun and probably way easier to understand wtf im talking about #so thats my gift to u ur welcome #retag later #ani blogging

[kazumahashimoto]

broe for the ask game.... bon and todoroki

aaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay

first impression- hot punk boy, definitely gay

impression now- hot punk boy, DEFINITELY FUCKING GAY AND ALSO TRANS i love bon so much...... he's so fucking like. he's punk as all hell and also a fucking nerd. he cares about his friends so much and says shit like SUCKAAAAA and he's afraid of being alone and he cuts his hair everytime something big happens in his life and i :,l i would die for him.

favorite moment- well i

but besides that. hm! god like. playing baseball with usamaro. all the times he yelled at rin for not letting them help him. when he told rin that he didn't need to ask for permission to take pictures with them. the bunny ears. when he fucking

you win or i give up or whatever. FUCK man. the TRUST. the LOVE. the promise that they'd make it out okay so that they could see kyoto tower together. FUCK i love bon

idea for a story- a bonrineko story that starts with boneko. bon is a baby gay and is like i like being around and being close to koneko but not in a gay way. shima is kinda cute though 😳 and he tells koneko about it and koneko is just like . wow bon. yup. definitely. yeah. no mhm. he sure does, have a face that is on his head. okay. and koneko holds it above his head forever and also there are lots of gay moments between koneko and bon pre-true cross. they still aren't together by then but they are gay and touchy and the rin shows up and they're both like well. and yeah bonrineko rights.

unpopular opinion- bon, is a furry. ik i keep saying that for all of these but it's true. they are all furries and bon had a crush on kovu from the lion king 2 when he was younger.

favorite relationship- bonrineko babyyyyyy

favorite headcanon- baby gay bon had a crush on shima. he thought he might be gay after he dyed his hair pink but oh boy was je wrong. also bon dyes his hair pink and has heterochromia and freckles because you sir have a galaxy brain :)

now.... todoroki

first impression- oh okay *is gay*

impression now- *still gay* he's cool but i don't think about him much. i like him a lot obviously but the most i've ever thought about him is from the okumura-todoroki au jfhfjcjf

favorite moment-

he's sleepy!!! also when tenya was spacing out and he was like hey are you okay? cos it made me really happy that he could tell something was up with him n shows they got closer after the whole stain thing.

idea for a story- fuyumi calls dabi (they haven't spoken in years) and asks for help to kill endeavor. he agree and they kill him together but it was mostly fuyumi. rei gets help and fuyumi takes care of shouto. everyone gets therapy and finally they're able to come together as a family and it's really good and cool.

unpopular opinion- shouto is not stupid :) he doesn't always pick up on things but that doesn't mean he doesn't. know what a fucking meme is. your ableism is showing.

favorite relationship- todoiida!!!!!!!! like i said earlier todoiimido is cool too buuuuut i'm more todoiida leaning. they're just really cute and they'd both be dumbasses about flirting and be super blunt about it and that makes them flustered jfbchf shouto likes holding hands n tenya likes stimming with his hands so they swing their arms a lot whenever they hold hands and it's really sweet and they both like it and their gay!!!!!!!!!

favorite headcanon- nb gay shouto!!!!! once endeavor is dead he gets like. super free with himself and his expression and he learns a lot about himself!!! he likes flowy things :) (he steals tenya's jackets cos they're so fucking big on him jvncjg)

ty dari :,l i love them both

#haha this one said gay rights #i just love them #ane #bnha #mha #asks

[chromsai]

can you do the same meme about Zarc, too, please? (and maybe Ray, if it's not too much to ask)

sure but no guarantees i’ll go way into depth like i did with yuya cuz lol that was a bit much

Zarc

Why I like them/why I don’t: i HATED him at first. like... i just... hated him. legitimately hated him. like... i hated roget and the doctor before him, for good reason, but once all was revealed i just... wanted him to die. for all the bad shit and pain that he had put yuya and the others through. i blamed it all on him. and tbqh i still do. you can’t really deny that all of the shit that went down was mostly all because of him and his fuck up. if he’d just... done the right thing when he fucked up the first time. none of this would have happened. but instead. cruelly ironic... he smiled it off. and i despised him for it. but there’s of course the twist... how can i hate him when he is the yuu boys? it’s... hard to fucking reconcile with those feelings in that situation. of course i saw it coming in a way that the yuus would be revealed to be some apocalypse-inducing demons or some shit, but you’re telling me that they wouldn’t have ever even existed in the first place if it wasn’t for the very fuck up that this asshole did that would ultimately later be the cause for all their pain too? what the fuck kind of sadistic recycling is this. he victimized himself plenty of times, claiming that his actions are a result of the wishes of society, which is true to a certain disturbing extent, but that portrays him as just another flawed af human being like any other, and to me that makes him relatable. you ever been in a situation where you fucked up real bad and the results of your actions at the time ended up being way more destructive than you initially intended them to? of course, in his situation it’s much more complicated than that but i just love that they showed us that zarc was just some random dude and just one little fuck up ruined his good intentions. it can happen to anyone. he’s not a good person. but his backstory (and redemption) through yuya showed us that he could have been. he’s a very interesting final antagonist and i think that showing us the real facets of his personality through the yuu boys was a unique and intriguing way to tell us his story. i love him because, fuck, if you paid attention throughout arc v, it’s honestly hard not to.

What I like about their appearance: boy. he’s fucking beautiful. his face. his hair. his stupid ass cowboy get up (i have a thing for dorks in stupid outfits). hoooo boy  i will always thirst for him.

Do I prefer their dub names or original names?: i mean thankfully it’s pronounced the same in the dub (tho tbh it’s still mostly funny but i’m sorry i can’t stand his dub voice). 

OTP: zarcray. i’m zarcray fucking trash. forever.

NOTP: him and any of the yuu boys. no. just no.

OT3: none. zarcray is all i care about.

Favourite card they use: himself??? LMAOO. i LOVE his dragon form.

Favourite moment they were in: i still.... will never get over... him dying at ray’s hands and cursing her as they split.... aaaaaaa... but i love all his moments. goooood shit.

Least favourite moment: fuck that scene of him summoning himself and sacrificing each of the dragons/yuuboys for it ugh fucking i cry

Would I fuck, marry or kill them: can i be like ray i can do all three of these mmmm

Ray

Why I like them/why I don’t: oh man, the only thing i dislike about Ray is that, due to obvious plot related reasons, she didn’t get as fleshed out through her counterparts as Zarc did through his counterparts. there’s an element of her personality that kinda feels like it’s missing to me so although i do love and enjoy writing her in fic, i still feel she might have needed that for me to enjoy her canon self just as much as i enjoy Zarc’s. that being said, i don’t think whatever’s missing about her characters is all that much and I get a good sense of the type of person she was through her counterparts and also her obvious badass nature being the only one who could have taken down Zarc and who vowed to do so as many times as necessary so long as he ever revives to destroy the world. i will say though, her intentions are very clear through Yuzu, and through Serena, we see she herself was most likely a flawed individual as well who also contributed to Zarc’s ultimate gain in power in some way or another. just as Serena blindly idolized Academia for so long without really knowing what was going on behind the scenes, Ray too was also a part of the Original Dimension’s society as much as everyone else in it was. no one was innocent in that regard, and her taking action to stop Zarc for indefinitely many times was just her way of realizing her own responsibility in her life too. She’s strong, arguably the strongest duelist in this show’s universe, and I love that about her.

What I like about their appearance: lol what have i said about redheads? love em. and her design is just A++++ she’s beautiful.

Do I prefer their dub names or original names?: still Ray in both dubs thank god

OTP: zarcray zarcray zarcray

NOTP: idk? her with any of her counterparts.

OT3: n/a

Favourite card they use: i mean we don’t get to see much besides the En cards but they pretty af and i love those effects anyway so

Favourite moment they were in: her putting Zarc in his place both times lols

Least favourite moment: idk? i don’t really have one? maybe her lack of more moments? we need more of our goddess

Would I fuck, marry or kill them: i’ll let zarc (try) these all with her~

#breakdawn-avenue #ask #reply #zarcray #grijdosl #oh i love them

[tartypatoos]

hey umm mao’s back story in the form of IM’s bc i’m a lazy fucker

tartypatoos icry bc growing up mao never hears the word woman or mom , and the idea that she's possibly not a mutant or not a turtle terrifies her bc it's all she knows

batalert Mao: idk who i am Babs: u is kind. u is smart. u is important. and u is my baby sis.

tartypatoos aaaaaa mao is just super upset the first time a villan tells her she's a human and sits her down and cross references her with the turtles

batalert Babs, cradling Mao's head while covering her ears: sHU T  U P

tartypatoos and in her story line it's one of the things that destroys her and triggers her depression and the part of her story where she runs away , gets kidnapped and tortured by the shredder , then finds out he's her biological father

batalert me, suddenly remembering an under co Foot Clan oc i have: i wanna give Mao two sisters now if u wouldn't m i n d

tartypatoos aaaAAAA GIVE HERALL THE SISTERS

batalert KJHGKJFDHGDKJ NI C E

tartypatoos mao basically goes months without seeing the boys bc splinter had put her on a buss out of town so she'd be safe but she ran away and got kidnapped instead

batalert me, preparing a care packet for her: poor baby girl. poor baby.

tartypatoos yeee when she does escape splinter gets mad at first because he was sending her away to avoid this and it puts a wedge in their relationship

batalert n O ;A;

batalert P O O R B A B Y G I R L give her a break 2k17

tartypatoos ummmm n ever ?

batalert Babs, filling out adoption papers: we'll see about that hgfjghjgh Babs. ily. but  p ls

tartypatoos thats actually when they find out about her maotations

batalert mAOTATIONS GOD i'll never be over that props to u

tartypatoos asdfghjk and she starts loosing her mind to the personalities of each one left over and warring in her head and not all of them are good ?

tartypatoos mikey gives them all nicknames some of them are like different aspects of her personality or personified emotions and then others are complete induvuals who know all of maos nlife and memories

batalert b OI IT'S LIKE INSIDE OUT BUT INSTEAD OF JUST EMOTIONS ALONE IT'S PERSONALITY ASPECTS BYE I'M SH  O OK

tartypatoos yeah but like mutating is painful for her and she can feel them trying to take over constantly when she isn't mutated and she knows that hypothetically they could make her not ever exist in her own body again

batalert yeah and i'm just :') imagining her pained grunts and cries as she shifts . mutates and i'm :') not okay gIVE HER A B R E AK ah ahhahaha wow fuck that hur ts

tartypatoos y EP

tartypatoos

and raph starts to get scared when one takes over enough where she destroys her room , breaks the music box donnie gave her and comes seconds away from lashing out and slitting his throat

batalert B I H I STG pls fight Babs but also Babs being gentle with Mao after this shit instead of being afraid and just pets her hair like "it's okay, Mao. it's okay."

tartypatoos and its a tiny cut but only bc raph stopped her and he nows donnie is the person she cares about the most

batalert yes that's a Return Of The Joker ref and i'm hurting jhgghfgjf wELP

tartypatoos om g

batalert Raph: knows Donnie is the only one she cares about now Raph:

tartypatoos so she is horrified and immediately runs because she doesn't wanna hurt anyone else

tartypatoos and raph tends to donnie before deciding he's going to ' talk ' to her

batalert ah ahah haha "talk" when there's quotation marks that does not mean talk and i'm :''''')

tartypatoos he finds her crying on a rooftop and she hears him and she's so happy and she asks if donnie is okay then then he pulls out his sai's and she's just mortified because it hits her about whats about to happen

tartypatoos he chases her and pins her on a siderailing and she's going super unstable and he just looks her in the eyes as he stabs her before tossing her off into the street

batalert https://youtu.be/2LuGzwNy2ws?t=1m7s

tartypatoos also she gets hit by a car on the way down

tartypatoos but she doesn't die

batalert fUCK U??????????? STOP HURTING ME oh thank god

tartypatoos instead raph panics and runs bc she wasn't supposed to survive that bc now she can snitch on him and oh my god humans just found her and she'll tell everyone about them

batalert "bc now she can snitch on him" i know i shouldn't have but i fucking snorted so l  o ud

tartypatoos asdfghjkl

batalert gfdkjgfkjghkjd

batalert "snitches get stitches" bITCH SHE NEEDS STITCHES BC SHE'S WOUNDED DAMN SON

tartypatoos ASDFGHJKL but she ends up admitted into a hospital in a three month coma and donnie finds out and basically is determined to break her out as soon as she's awake bc then she won't be under constant watch and raph lies and says it was shredder who did it so they don't know yet and on one of raphs shifts to watch her he skips and when it's donnies turn he freaks bc she's gone

batalert ah hah aha hah a i'm not okay fuck this fuck u bye i'm i need some fUCKING TIS SU ES STOP HURTING THE ABBY BABY

batalert FML

tartypatoos sdfghjkl turns out she did tell everyone she was just begging to go home bc mikey needs her and she wants to know if donnie is okay

batalert :')))))))))))))))))

tartypatoos but they can't find her long ass name on record and they assume she's just delusional

batalert

tartypatoos so she gets sent to a psychiatric ward and she's fine at first at least until someone tells her her family doesn't exist and she just looses it and she ATTACKS THEm

batalert mA O PLS FAM I STG GIVE HER A BREA K

tartypatoos so she gets put in solitary and drugged up and strapped to a table and pretty much is just zombified and they drive it into her head that none of her family exists

tartypatoos so when they do pin down her location they find her with a sheet over her body and face , strapped down to a table and when they take it off she just shows no emotion she's like ' oh my imaginary friends came back ' and it just crushes all of them

batalert and it just crushes my heart i

batalert need to lie down i am one wounded bITCH my friend :') i c b

tartypatoos they pretty much bring her home and she's completely numb emotionally and physically they had her so drugged she can't even stand they just lay her in her bed and wait in the next room just trying to figure out what to do

batalert imma go mobile till i fall asleep bc this stupid bitch hasn't slept all night bc again she's stupid so i'll be back in a few hours fjghfjhgjf

tartypatoos asdfghjkl

batalert pls spam me with anything else u wanna share if u'd like! i love coming back to cool stuff <3

tartypatoos s ame tho

tartypatoos aaaaaa oKIE

batalert sorry to poof i'm just so sore i feel death poking my lower bac k fghfkjghkjf i sHALL RETURN later fghfjgfhgj

tartypatoos YEEEEE basically they start fighting and it takes her like a week before the drugs wear off

tartypatoos and when they do she just wakes up to an exhausted donnie and a sleeping mikey and leo on her bed and raph is nowhere to be seen and she just starts crying and they all just hold her and splinter runs in and donnie asks her what happened and she just

tartypatoos she wont say

tartypatoos and when she falls asleep again donnie looks at her wounds and he just loses it bc he knows what shredder given wounds look like and that aint it so he runs to raph and just goes off enough to wake her up and her first reaction is to run /bCtHaTfIxEsEvErYtHiNg/

tartypatoos she makes it to the top of one of the skyscrapers and thats when everything hits rock bottom she blames herself and she /knows/ they'd be better off without her so she jumps but this time raph and donnie followed her donnie jumps after her and grabs he and they cry and scream at each other on the way down before last second metal head pulls them away from the ground

tartypatoos and they just cry together on a rooftop and that's when they realized they were being ambushed and donnie tries to block her from a blast of mutagen only for maoyonnie to be born

#(( this covers how the maotations started and most of her trauma #(( there is attempted murder #(( violence and medical abuse #batalert #// .& maoyin ! tracking #// .& hc | mao | general headcannons // #// .& musing | maoyin // #// .& visage | maoyin // #// .& char tag | hamato yang neko mao yin ! dance dark cherry blossom . brightest cat . // #// .& tartypatoos ! tracking tag //

[ghoultyrant]

FoZ Notes 19

We’re hitting the end-game stretch!

Does that mean the series is impr-hhahaahaha I can’t type it with a straight face.

No.

-----------------------

There are no magic air conditioners, and we're given a bunch of reasons why... which apply to the magic ceiling fan we're promptly introduced to.

If I were reading this for pleasure, this would be the point at which I put the book down and indulged in vivid fantasies of murdering the fuck out of the author. As-is, I'm still having a hard time forcing myself to soldier on. I know, it’s a tiny thing, sort of ridiculous to be my breakpoint, but something about how the author is not actually trying to make sense but is still going to try to pretend like this makes sense just provokes me like nothing else. Before I could sort of imagine the magic lamps and so on were some kind of worldbuilding, even if in practice they seemed to serve the purpose of having a medieval aesthetic while having modern functionality (eg the Academy is a Japanese high school, but magic), but this nonsense about trying to explain why we have a rotating ceiling fan but not magic air conditioners (By which we mean we do have magic air conditioners, they’re just unpopular aaaargh) is just... no.

Assertion that Lightning is a high level spell because it can “hit anything." (ie including the caster, if they’re not careful) More typically mages uses Lightning Cloud, which spawns a cloud a short distance away to spit lightning.

Oh, remember that ominous foreshadowing with the Elves last volume? Yeah, fuck that, time to be attacked by the Elemental Siblings again.

Who apparently can all do Ancient Magic? The FUCK?

Tabitha was apparently number seven in the hierarchy of the blah blah Northern Spyknights. So who were the other two?

Something I probably ought to have mentioned eons ago: BIG FEELS make regular magic stronger too. I've... tended to ignore it because it's blatant Protagonist Power rather than an integral part of the setting, though.

Elves apparently live about twice as long as humans. Really? That's all?

Oh, the Elves are here, watching the fight with the Elemental Siblings and spewing racist bullshit. Also, asserting that 'barbarian' mages don't use weapons, which is so hilariously wrong I would applaud it as a nice bit of Ignorant Elves if it weren't for the fact that the author is so incapable of consistency it seems far more likely this is just one more piece of his own canon he's forgotten.

Oh, and elves have magic heat-seeing goggles, which has caused humans to think Elves can see in the dark. I fucking hate this setting's magitechnology. It's stupid nonsense that in no way fits to the setting's barebones magic rules -which is quite the feat of incompetent writing, given that the setting's rules ARE so barebones!

It's really sad watching how FoZ's artist gets better and more ambitious while the author descends into inane drivel. I really hope the artist does other work for something actually deserving of such craft.

The Elves have set up a base camp surrounded by a "barrier of Ancient Magic." We later learn this barrier makes it impossible to even realize the camp is there, with someone approaching it directly ending up going around it without realizing it. Basically? Fuck you, Elves can do ANYTHING, so long as it's conveniently in line with the author's current intentions. You know, just like regular magic! Aaaargh. [And no, they don’t use this craziness to protect their homeland or anything of the sort. This is a one-off piece of nonsense to justify the Elves sneaking into Halkeginia successfully]

Oh, and they're kidnapping Saito, when all their prior dialogue indicated they were here to capture one of the Void SPELLCASTERS, not one of their goddamn familiars. Because of course everything is about Saito, even when it EXPLICITLY ISN’T.

Aaand here's Louis appearing in a teleport and instantly casting Explosion before Ali has even noticed she arrived. So remember all that crap about Void spells taking forever to chant?... 'cause the author sure as hell doesn't!

Okay, something I haven't been mentioning: the story CONSTANTLY shitting on Louise by saying her body isn't attractive and her personality is outright repellent. Why am I mentioning this? Well, Ali sees her, and his first thought is that she's extraordinarily beautiful, even by Elven standards. aaaaaaa

And now Louise rapid-casts Explosion to nuke a bunch of arrow-branches. I hate. So. Much.

Oh, and the Elves have been hanging out nearby for SEVERAL DAYS before this stupid kidnapping plot went off. Why? How are they already here? What the fuck is even going on??

Where humans hate half-Elves because of their paranoid fears about evil cannibal Elf blood showing true, Elves hate half-Elves because their existence "brings shame on Elfkind". Except Luctiania, who is all about SCIENCE!!!!

We keep getting bizarre assertions that Ancient Magic gets weaker the further you are from the ground. No caveat for wind-based spells or anything, and so far no explanation as to why Halkeginian airships haven't tilted things more toward humans. This is dumb. [Future note: Next volume we learn that Elven airships are much better than human airships, for inadequately explained/outright nonsensical reasons. This doesn’t explain shit unless you accept the author’s nonsensical convention that mages don’t cast spells in airship combat, never mind that the scale of spell damage in personal combat from Dot mages is such that they should be very much relevant. This story is awful, is what I’m saying]

Even Luctiana turns green with nausea at the idea of taking on a human appearance. (Oh, and of course Elves have a spell for changing their appearance that has had no practical impact on their culture or daily methodology, because I'm reading FoZ)

Elves have a sleep spell that can keep someone asleep for more than a week, because of course the magic is always convenient for the story-of-the-moment. Don't think too hard on, you know, basic physiological functions and how the Elves avoided having Saito and Tiffania die of dehydration or soil themselves during the trip, because the author sure as hell didn't.

Elves have vertical slit pupils like a snake?! What the fuck, why is this the first we've heard of it??

Elven country is called "Neftes".

Elves consider the "Holy Land" to have always been their territory, and believe humans just arbitrarily declared it to be the Holy Land.

Luctiana's house has some standing enchantment she claims will reduce Saito and Tiffania to ash if they attack her. How? What does this have to do with anything we’ve heard about how Ancient Magic works?

Tiffania is willing to die to pass on her Void magic to someone else. Why? Because she thinks nobody cares about her, and that she's just a burden on others. sigh

The Elves would've used Crazy Poison on Saito and Tiffania if Bidashal hadn't vigorously argued against it because for some fucking retarded reason Bidashal thinks Saito is "different" from most 'barbarians'.

Elven tradition holds that Shaitan's Gate was opened six thousand years ago and a devil came out and killed half of all Elves. So they don't want it being messed with.

Adyl is the name of the Elven capitol. It's a city that extends far out into the ocean.

Apparently the Elves DO have their own language. Which they never use except this one time, for some fucking reason. And they all know the Halkeginian language, even though Halkeginians are filthy dirt-grubbing barbarians and imitating them on any level disgusts them. Yeah, that makes sense.

Elves have super-clean buildings. Um. How?

Tentacle porn scene with Tiffania because of course. Oh my god.

We finally come back to that Anubis/Gandalfr connection. Bidashal is fairly certain they actually are the same thing. Anubis is a saint in Elven culture because he supposedly defeated the devil.

Fouquet and Wardes are being instructed by Vittoria to rescue Saito and Tiffania... or kill them if that's too hard. Goddammit.

Turns out this "device in the Holy Land" story is a lie! lol noobs you trusted Romalia lol. (Seriously, why did these morons give them an inch of trust?) In actuality Vittorio just intends to cast a big spell using all the Void folk and their familiars. It also involves the four "treasures" somehow. You know, those things that don't matter except when they do?

"Lifsrasil," the heart of God, the last Familiar. Brimir's Elf familiar was this one, in addition to being Gandalfr. No, we're not getting an explanation on what this familiar's thing is, or what the fuck is up with this doublefamiliar thing.

Holy shit TIFFANIA is capable of intelligible moral calculus? What?? [Reader note:... dammit, I forget what this was in reference to]

Holy shit Tiffania with the sick burns. "You bring shame to all Elves." "Yeah well YOU bring shame to EVERY LIVING CREATURE ON THE PLANET" And the asshole Elf has no good response to that. Damn, why couldn’t we have had this Tiffania this whole time instead of the “lol big breasts” Tiffania?

Luctiana objects strongly enough to using the Crazy Poison to rescue our hero and her idiot friend... on some conditions.

Elven aesthetic with boats involves imitating nature: fish, birds... and lightning?

Bafflingly, the Elves have dragon-drawn vehicles running through roads like a modern city's cars, with sidewalks and glass windows for storefronts. Everything about the Elves is retarded.

Sort of surprised at Luctuania casually guessing an Elf stole her boat, with all this utopian society bullshit.

Passing reference to the idea that a given individual exerts dominance over the local spirits/Ancient Magic. As in, Caster B can't do anything if Caster A has dominance over the area. If this weren’t Familiar of Zero we’re talking about here, I’d wonder if maybe this was a hint as to why Ancient Magic was abandoned by the ancient Halkeginians in favor of wand-based magic. As-is it is, in grand FoZ tradition, a one-off reference unsupported/actively contradicted by any other part of the text that sounds logical and interesting.

Water Dragons finally showing up in the plot. They're the biggest and 'strongest' of all dragons, can't fly, seem to spray water instead of fire.

Aaaand Derflinger has come back by possessing the katana Saito has been carting around. Oh and he can catch lightning and hold the charge to enhance his next attack. What is this, Dark Sector?

Allusion to willpower limits applying to Ancient Magic. Since when? Oh, duh, since just now. Because FoZ.

Elves use dolphins to pull sea carriages. Fucked-up.

I hate this author. Write Luctiana being naked without giving it any thought because lol titillation, then later have Tiffania show off her breasts and have Luctiana act like it's obvious that getting naked is a big deal. Fuck you and your shitty, blatantly inconsistent writing.

Apparently Elves routinely give swords some degree of intelligence...and only Elves do this. So why is it back in Volume One nobody was wanting to melt Derflinger down as an obvious Elf artifact?...

Brimir's familiar stabbed him through the heart with Derflinger. Derflinger corroborates.

End volume 19.

---------------

In which Saito and Tiffania spend a lot of time in elfland and depressingly little actual plot happens, somehow.

Instead, the story just seems to be getting shittier and shittier. I actually miss the no-notes-taken-about-it-because-goddammit-FoZ crap with Scarron’s “Dancing Fairies Inn”, by comparison.

#Familiar of Zero #Notes #Argh