#I am going to save so many clips and screenshots from this episode

[frankie-n-foughts]

I couldn’t resist the temptation of the sneak peaks for the finale and-

What the frick WHAT THE FRICK WHAT THE FRICK

The way Hens passed out? The way Chim is impaled AGAIN??? The way Eddie is pinned?? The way Buck lands on the windscreen?? And the way Bobby slides and then fking tumbles backwards into the dust???!!

I am NOT okay and idk if this makes me more or less anxious for the finale tomorrow morning but idk how I’m meant to sleep peacefully after watching that 😭

#I only lasted 7 hours until I caved and watched them #I’m sure there’s like metaphors here but all my brain is filled with now is panic not logic #the Bobby unaccounted for is killing me #like omg Bobby pls #I am going to save so many clips and screenshots from this episode #911 spoilers #911 fox #911 abc #frankienrambles #msc

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

This clip is from early in Bugle episode 4220, which I listened to for the first time today. Nish Kumar is referring to a table that existed on Wikipedia until recently, keeping track of every episode done by all the co-hosts on The Bugle. I referred to this frequently as I listened to the first 200 episodes of the Bugle 4000-series last year, to see who would have appearances coming up.

I just went back to this last week, and was very annoyed to find the table has been taken off of Wikipedia. I was also annoyed with myself for not copying it into Excel when I had the chance, or at the very least taking a screenshot. That’s a good lesson to remember and something on which I normally do better than this: if you like something that’s on the internet, download it and save it on a hard drive. Because the internet can take things away at any time.

I found this table so helpful that last week, I decided to recreate it in Excel, putting each person’s name with the list of episode numbers in which they’d appeared, and then tallying their total number of appearance. Today, I decided to take the recreated table and make other tabs with it. Sorting the list of Bugle co-hosts by total number of episodes, and by their first appearance.

I also sorted by nationality, which was surprisingly difficult, due to many people having more than one nationality. I tended to categorize them more often by where they live now than by where they used to live, though with some exceptions - I labeled Lloyd Langford as Welsh rather than Australian because obviously he’s Welsh, Lloyd Langford’s whole thing is being Welsh. I also created a separate category for English/Americans, because I didn’t know what else to do with Desiree Burch and John Oliver. I made one tab for this, colour-coded by nationality, and that let me calculate the total number of appearances by all the guests of each nationality, and rank it by what nationality has appeared the most often.

I kept this national colour-coding in another tab, in which made a row for each episode, and added the date, title, and co-host names to each row. Doing that took me several hours this afternoon, and I was in the process of filling in those rows when I heard the clip I uploaded above.

I am not technically the person Nish Kumar was talking about, because I have never put anything on Wikipedia. But I was recreating, and then expanding and improving the exact Wikipedia table he was talking about, and I was doing it as I listened to him talk about what sort of person does this. And I would like to say: you’re wrong, Nish. You’re not usually wrong, but you’re wrong this time, particularly the bit about no one doing this if they moonlight as a jock. Because I did stop updating that spreadsheet when I had to leave and go teach a bunch of people between the ages of 13-ish and 27-ish, some of whom compete at a very high level, how to do a sport. And I wouldn’t call it one of the nerdier sports. I mean, it’s not one of the popular sports, it’s not like American football that has all the jock movies made about it. But it’s not, like, badminton. Or, and no offense to anyone who’s appeared on that podcast, cricket.

I quite like that phrase, “moonlights as a jock”. It’s not a bad description for my position of always being the most sports-obsessed person in a group of nerds or the nerdiest person in a group of athletes. I might start referring to myself as a person who moonlights as a jock. I found it very amusing to be told that stats like this are never tracked by people who moonlight as jocks, while I was literally in the middle of tracking those stats and checking the time to make sure all that Bugle stat tracking didn’t make me late for my jock moonlighting.

Anyway, here’s the spreadsheet as it stands now, if anyone’s interested, updated to the most recent Bugle episode, which at the moment is 4263. I still want to add other stuff to it, like marking what episodes were recorded live and where they were recorded, and maybe even when a non-live Bugle was recorded in an unusual place if Andy was traveling. But for the moment, it’s certainly got enough information for me to be able to easily check it and see what’s happening in upcoming episodes, which is all I really wanted when I started it.

[kukuandkookie]

Please send help Xi Yang Yang literally has me in a chokehold and I am struggling knowing that out of most donghua, most of which are generally already pretty underrated and niche in the mainstream, this is probably one of the MOST NICHE fandoms I could ever get into because it is a kids’ show. 😭

It has a fandom in China that’s actually super active (I love getting lost in Bilibili’s AMVs and animation memes when I can afford to (as in I usually can’t/shouldn’t because I spend too long on that addicting site)), but obviously I’m not fluent enough to be super active on Chinese websites. 🥲

BUT XI YANG YANG JUST HAS GOTTEN SO ANIME AND BADASS AND HEARTFELT AND IT KILLS ME BECAUSE I’M WATCHING THESE ADORABLE LITTLE CHARACTERS I LIKED AS A CHILD BECOME AMAZING, ACTUALLY DEEP CHARACTERS IN REALLY INTRIGUING STORIES!!! It doesn’t help my addiction that the Xi Yang Yang channel on YouTube literally uploads all the episodes so I can watch them!! For free!!! It’s so accessible and thus super addicting!!!

I just found out from summary videos what happens in the latest season (the one where the goats and wolves go back to the fantasy cat kingdom except this time they discover a dog kingdom) and AHHHHHHHHH. I was literally—and yes, I do mean literally!—screaming because OH MY GOD KGJSKFHSJS THE PLOT. THE THINGS THAT HAPPEN.

God I wish there was a fandom for this. I used to yell about it on Twitter and at my Chinese friend who also liked animation (he was even nice enough to send me Xi Yang Yang merch!!) but my Twitter followers follow me for my Scum Villain (and maybe Erha) content and my friend isn’t active anymore. 😭

Obviously it’s my account so I can just post what I want but what I want to do is yell and upload too many screenshots and yell some more and sub video clips and post those too. I LITERALLY HAVE CLIPS OF XI YANG YANG THAT I SUBBED MYSELF JUST SITTING ON MY PHONE GLSJDKSHSJS.

I can’t emphasize enough how this series has grown and changed so much since I was a kid—now rather than have Tom and Jerry-esque comedy and rather stiff animation, it’s more colourful and fluid and even more meaningful—and it remains super funny. Like yes, sometimes the animation is still a bit off but overall it’s just improved so much!! The action is so shounen it’s just so much fun!

https://youtu.be/yQpdr4h2rbc

And the characters are all so likeable—like I genuinely think Xi Yang Yang and Hui Tai Lang are examples of iconic character design, and their friends are pretty good too (Xi Yang Yang can get really funky with some of the character designs—for example with the egg villains etc but overall the main characters look so so cute).

I’m so glad they reformed Hui Tai Lang in Mighty Little Defenders!! I’ve watched every season since then and they’re all really really enjoyable. Since we’re not just constantly reusing Hui Tai Lang as a villain and having him chase the sheep around, we get a lot more interesting stories: the entire Rescue Across Time season, with all its time-travelling shenanigans, remains one of my favourites, as does the aforementioned fantasy cat kingdom transmigration season (we even got the goats brainwashed into lovable jerk versions of themselves who also happen to be cats!!). The whole plot surrounding Xi Yang Yang’s parents and Bing Bing Yang is really nice too, and Hui Tai Lang is such a good dad. 😭

Also I guess it doesn’t technically matter if I spoil the latest season and reveal why I was screaming earlier today, but basically I found out they make Hui Tai Lang brainwashed by dark energy into becoming a villain. Xi Yang Yang tries to fight him and they both get affected with the dark energy, but in the end, Hui Tai Lang still sacrifices himself to save his best friend. GOD THEIR BOND IS SO CUTE. ;w;

I know this is like all gibberish to people who haven’t watched Xi Yang Yang and I’m betting 90% of you haven’t (and that even if you have, 95% of you or more haven’t watched the newer seasons (from Mighty Little Defenders onwards)). But basically besides Xi Yang Yang being devastated by Hui Tai Lang’s potential death, Gou Xing Lang, the villain from the cat fantasy kingdom season (Against the Dark Force) soMEHOW MANAGES TO SAVE HIM FROM WITHIN THE DARKNESS???? AND IT HAS ME EVEN MORE EMO BECAUSE HE HAD A SAD, PRETTY TOUCHING BACKSTORY WHERE HE LOST TOUCH WITH HIS CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND WHO BETRAYED HIM (which they referenced in the Ultimate Battle season) BUT WE ALL THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD!!!

So now I’m wondering if they’ll build on the fact he’s somehow in the dark energy??? Or if they’ll just leave it at that!?

Man I haven’t even watched the season yet because the YouTube channel gets the seasons way later than China does, so I don’t know the details and from what I have seen, I might find some of it a bit odd, but they really do have the capability to make me feel feels, don’t they? Just from a summary video and I was already getting all emo over Xi Yang Yang and Hui Tai Lang’s bond, and how badass they both are when they’re a bit more villainous.

I’m also wheezing because the summary video pointed out how Hui Tai Lang lamented the fact he always gets made into the villain, and it’s kind of true… 😂

They turned him into a robot in the Ultimate Battle season—and ahhhh he looks so badass!!—and now here too he got infected with dark energy. But I’m down for dark Hui Tai Lang and dark Xi Yang Yang… Like I’m really happy they brought back the kitty versions of the goats because the whole premise there is that they’re like the goats but also opposite, so a lot of them are way meaner than the goats. And that’s always such a fun idea!!

Kitty Xi Yang Yang is brash and arrogant and only cares about power/fun while Xi Yang Yang himself is clever but caring—even when he can be a bit vain. Mei Yang Yang is sweet and a bit timid—although I love the badass older version of herself we got in Ultimate Generation—and yet kitty Mei Yang Yang is just a major bitch and I love it. Like think Flutterbitch from the first couple Discord episodes or from the Chrysalis episode lol. Fei Yang Yang is protective and strong and brash while kitty Fei Yang Yang is selfish and obsessed with cleanliness. Nuan Yang Yang is tender and caring yet kitty Nuan Yang Yang is basically a green tea bitch—she pretends to be sweet on the surface to get people to like her and listen to her but obviously inside she’s not that sweet. Instead, kitty Nuan Yang Yang is rather lazy ahaha.

Speaking of lazy though, we finally got to see kitty Lan Yang Yang, which we didn’t see in Against the Dark Force, since he was never brainwashed. Apparently kitty Lan Yang Yang is still cowardly and gluttonous but also kind of…coquettish? 😂

I’m genuinely so curious about what happens in the dog kingdom season ahhhhh!!! But so far I’m watching Ultimate Battle as it’s updated on YouTube, and I’ve enjoyed this season a lot. It reminds me of Sonic actually, and new Xi Yang Yang already kind of reminds me of Sonic (that’s actually part of why I recommend it—it’s like various really good series all combined into one, and I think fans of modern kids’ shows will also probably enjoy Xi Yang Yang!).

Having Xi Yang Yang and Hui Tai Lang chase a villain into the future and meet their friends 15 years after they disappeared is such a cool plot idea! Plus the villain himself is pretty neat—he wants to roboticize everyone to remove the weakness that is emotion—and from spoilers I know, he’s bringing a lot more intriguing things to the table later.

I’m obsessed with how mature Xi Yang Yang’s friends now are—like they still feel like themselves, but you can really tell they’ve grown up! And it feels natural, which is great.

Mei Yang Yang became a journalist to better search for Xi Yang Yang, and we get lore on her this season, which is really awesome. She’s now no longer bothered by dirtiness and she can fend for herself, which is great to watch—I love her weapon too because it’s a sword that can break into pieces to become longer, like a whip.

Fei Yang Yang is now a badass, reliable firefighter, so he no longer carries that childish brashness of his younger self, and he’s really cool in action. For example, the way he figured out Bu Lei’s plot and was later the one who used three cards, overexerting himself yet becoming super powerful and badass in order to defeat Professor T, was just so cool.

Lan Yang Yang is working as a food reviewer basically and while he’s undoubtedly still Lan Yang Yang, enjoying eating and sleeping, he’s well-respected in his community and sometimes he actually feels full because chefs search for him so much lol. He also has a cool weapon—it’s a flying platform with three sort of canons floating above it, and it kind of resembles a fidget spinner!

Nuan Yang Yang achieved her dream of becoming a singer and I like how consistent her love of music—and her being a fan of a singer who’s a duck—is to her character. I am disappointed because they made her slimmer and I feel like her being a bigger goat as a mountain goat was always a fun part of her backstory and why she looks slightly different from the other sheep. Despite that, I get making older characters look very different from their younger selves for the sake of change (eg Anko getting fat in Boruto vs being skinny in Naruto), so while I’d prefer her being her bigger size, I can live with this change.

Some of the roboticization storylines are really badass too—I already mentioned Hui Tai Lang’s, but there’s also Hong Tai Lang’s admittedly hot roboticized look (and I feel like I can call it hot because the Xi Yang Yang team did also release an artwork that showed a human version!!). I also know there’ll be more involving Xiao Hui Hui, as his abandonment issues from Hui Tai Lang’s vanishment were resolved a bit earlier in the season but I suppose they’re bringing some more drama later! Mei Yang Yang’s trauma from Xi Yang Yang’s disappearance also gets explored, and we get to learn some of her lore, which I am very *rubs hands excitedly* about. 👀

And of course I know some spoilers about Professor T that I’m just like ‼️ over. The other robots also had pretty compelling stories—Bu Lei is fun as a green tea bitch/yandere type villain and Hei Zhuan (Hei Zuan?)’s story with his sister was cute. But Otto’s whole storyline literally nearly made me cry. 😭

OH AND I CAN’T WRITE ALL THIS AND NOT TALK ABOUT THE NEWEST XI YANG YANG MOVIE, WHICH IS ABOUT BASKETBALL.

I actually skipped the basketball season since obviously I’m not exactly into the sport, but I’ve determined since I should probably watch it still sometime because I realized later it nonetheless carries that Xi Yang Yang charm, so even if I don’t care too much for the dramatization of basketball (you know the kind; the kind that permeates all sports anime), I can nevertheless enjoy it for depicting my favourite characters. 🥺

I’ve caught a glimpse of some episodes of the basketball season and they are cute!! The one where they compete with the bunnies and actually help save them from famine despite the bunnies trying to cheat to win was really sweet, and later episodes depict that awesome bond between Hui Tai Lang and Xi Yang Yang.

So back to the movie—I brought up the basketball season because obviously the movie does adapt/reference some of it since they’re both about basketball, and I did skip the movie too for a while… But I later watched it and AHHHHHHH GLSBDKSHDKSB OF COURSE I ENJOYED IT. It’s a depiction of characters I love being themselves while on an adventure!! How could I not enjoy it!?

The animation style was really neat; seeing the sheep and wolves in a more detailed anthro style than their usually chibi/cartoony style meant we got some pleasing aesthetics—for example, I enjoyed how their eyes corresponded with their themed colours (like in the series Xi Yang Yang and Hui Tai Lang both have dark bluish-grey eyes, but in the movie Xi Yang Yang’s are very visibly blue and Hui Tai Lang’s are very visibly purple. It’s quite pretty!).

I’ve also embarrassingly enough tweeted about this before, but they did make Hui Tai Lang…unfairly hot in the movie LGBSKFHSJSH. Basically, they gave him consistently half-lidded eyes and with the more violet colour and more realistic proportions (since the characters look more anthro). My younger brother even complained about how such series indulges furries since you could tell they gave Hui Tai Lang those muscles etc on purpose lmao.

Who let this man look like this? Who!?

But yeah Hui Tai Lang and Xi Yang Yang have a conflict within the film—which of course they do; it’s a movie so we need to up the ante—but as sad as it is seeing characters we like have a falling out (and as overdramatic as some of the angst may feel), it’s nevertheless characters I cherish facing conflict. So seeing them come back together after and working hard to get the basketball championship after losing is really lovely, and I really enjoy how Xi Yang Yang lets all its characters shine.

In every season, while there may be one character who gets more focus along with Xi Yang Yang and Hui Tai Lang—for example Against the Dark Force was very much Lan Yang Yang’s season and in some ways, Ultimate Battle allowed Mei Yang Yang to shine—all the characters get arcs focused on them that correlate to the bigger overarching plot. I mean, every season is 60 episodes!! So of course we have lots of time to explore the characters and I really appreciate that.

So even in the film, we do see the other characters shine, even if it’s all tied back to the overarching plot of basketball and even if Xi Yang Yang and Hui Tai Lang take centre stage. I also really enjoyed the ending since it kept me on the toes—the rival team to Xi Yang Yang’s had a character that was going through his own arc, but I was desperately hoping the sheep would win the championship this time since they lost to the wolves in the basketball season. Plus I was crossing my fingers waiting for Hui Tai Lang to get to shine since they set up how he’s not the best player and thus feels like he’s in Xi Yang Yang’s shadow…

And fortunately the film did end up going with the best possible ending (imo)!

Spoilers ahead if you care lol:

Basically, they did let the sheep finally win the championship, which is perfect since obviously this is a sequel to the basketball season, where they started off as the underdogs yet did end up losing, even with all the growth they had. It felt like a perfect progression—especially since even though the rival team (the tigers) did have a character with his own arc and reasons why he really wanted to win, they only had to have his father finally approve of him playing basketball to give him a satisfactory conclusion. As in, he didn’t need to win the way the sheep needed to.

And thankfully, while I was getting worried throughout the final match, they did let Hui Tai Lang shine!! He got to take the winning shot after Xi Yang Yang faked being the winning shot, which is of course the perfect progression to Hui Tai Lang’s arc too. I was so happy when they did that!!

Of course, some of this conclusion is probably obvious in hindsight, but I did have a fear…mostly because the sheep almost did lose until they protested an issue and it initially looked like Xi Yang Yang was going to take the winning shot—which if he had, it would feel less satisfying, as Hui Tai Lang wouldn’t get to join him in the limelight.

I need to have more trust in the Xi Yang Yang team lol. I’ve loved almost everything they’ve done so far, and whenever I doubt them, they manage to pleasantly surprise me! And what I mean by “doubt them” is that sometimes Chinese series will have writing conventions a westerner may find odd, but even when Xi Yang Yang subverts my expectations and indulges in that “odd” Chinese sense of humour etc, I still love it to bits (and listen, I’m not saying Chinese writers are bad. Not at all! I’m just referring to the fact that as a Canadian-born-Chinese, I’ve witnessed people complain about Chinese story details because it’s not what they’re used to).

OH ALSO THE MOVIE’S OST SLAPS. I KEEP LISTENING TO THE SONGS ON LOOP GLSHFKSHDKSH.

https://youtu.be/eEmzxOGXR_A

https://youtu.be/fK0fpdOh8C0

But wow okay I rambled WAY too much lmaooooo. I just can’t help it!! When I really love things I love them to absolute pieces, and when a fandom is underrated, I tend to feel the need to actually be active and promote it so I can spread how happy it makes me. Plus I can happily juggle multiple brain rots at once, even if I have one main one that takes centre stage lol. Like right now Scum Villain and Erha are my biggest obsessions—and y’all have seen how much I can ramble about both Scum Villain and Erha lol—but of course I love all my donghua and danmei and manhua and cdramas and Chinese music. ♥️

Along with my other planned blog entries about donghua and danmei and Chinese-themed media (such as me wanting to write some thoughts on Everything Everywhere All at Once), I have every intention of writing about why you should watch Xi Yang Yang on my blog ahaha.

I just. Have so many happy feelings surrounding Xi Yang Yang right now and I want to yell about them specifically, especially since there’s barely a fandom for them in the west. All this rambling is a result of me bottling up my fangirling for weeks NGNSKDHSKSH. Plus I’m a naturally ramble-y person! But I feel even more ramble-y when a series is an underrated gem and makes me endlessly happy, the way Xi Yang Yang is and does. 🥺

#kuku rambles #kuku88 #long post #喜羊羊与灰太狼 #喜羊羊 #pleasant goat and big big wolf #xi yang yang #donghua #chinese animation #Youtube #GOD THIS IS SO LONG AHKFHSKDJS #AND I DOUBT ANYONE WOULD READ IT LOL #IF YOU DO I’M SORRY BECAUSE THIS MUST ALL READ AS GIBBERISH TO YOU #I need to stop getting into tiny inactive fandoms x’D #(I say even as I have absolutely no intention of stopping— #I mean I’ve been obsessively in love with various Chinese media for months now and that’s so underrated; of course I’m not stopping!!)

[btsandvmin]

It’s not really a question but more your opinion on a moment that I noticed in Run Bts in Canada when they were picking the rooms. There was a moment where Tae and RM were sitting on a coach and JM, Hobi & JK where on the other one, and I could swear that Jimin and Tae were looking at each other flirting. The flirting was quite sexual I think with jimin looking at Tae smiling seductively and Tae staring back at him. Hobi caught the look in jm’s eyes. Have you seen it?

Part 2: And also the staring and the tension is still going on as they stared again during an interview on a bus (they were in the US). That makes me think that there is definitely something going on and that their relationship is not just platonic. And I would also think that the other members are aware of what is going on between them, especially Hobi. Thanks for your opinion on this and I just love your objective analysis. Great work! :)

Hi @sweetscapri​ and thank you for the ask. Run in Canada is honestly such good three episodes for Vminies, and I personally think there are a lot of interesting small little moments to note, not the least in regards to the bed sharing. Jimin’s reaction to Taehyung’s “I wonder who I will hug while sleeping” is something I keep coming back to, especially since he hides his face and presses himself closer to Taehyung. Their reactions being so stiff and odd when they end up sharing is also weird, especially in contrast to JinKook and with Tae’s earlier statment about who he will end up hugging now turning into how he doesn’t think he can sleep in that room. It’s stuff like this that makes Vmin weird. Careful and nervous to me, but maybe giving off the feelings of hating each other to antis. It’s all about perspective and interpretation after all.

I know when you are talking about, but to me I don’t think there is anything explicit about it and am not even completely sure they are looking only at each other and trying to communicate. The members keep talking and looking at each other and the possible moment where Vmin might look at each other is so short and from an angle that makes it difficult to tell if they are locking eyes, that I can’t personally get much out of it.

This is just one screenshot, but I did go back a look at the full clip between when Jin left and Jimin left, and I still think it’s too ambigous to see anything from this scene. Like I said, I think there are a lot of interesting reactions and moments from these Run episodes in Canada, but to me this is too little and too uncertain to count as much or maybe anything at all.

The other clip you mention in the bus, I do see as commuinication between Vmin, and I do think it’s interesting with the eyebrow movement Jimin does. I think Vmin seem to in general communicate without words a lot, and that on it’s own is to me a sign of their closeness and ability to understand each other very well. (And perhaps even a habit developed out of being a bit secretive/private.)

That being said, I am personally of the opinion that reading the thoughts behind certain looks is too difficult and vague to come to any real conclusion. Same with most body language, heart eyes or “flirty” behavior in general. I just think knowing the reasons for doing something, their thoughts or feelings while doing these things, are mostly just interpretations. We might be able to tell some general things like if something is a good response or a bad one, but I don’t think we can know much why that might be.

It can look flirty or fond, but I see the same type of arguments from all shippers, and that’s why to me it seems to mostly be based in the viewers own interpretations. And I don’t trust my own interpretations to be factual, at most I can get a feeling from some moments, but it’s still MY feelings if that makes sense.  Even something clearly “flirty“ can be done as a joke for all we know. I know I get that feeling from some ji/kook or tae/jin moments for example, as if they want to create a feeling of tension. But why I read their moment or other ships’ as different to Vmin might after all be my bias speaking.

Don’t get me wrong, I do think there are moments with Vmin that I would call “heart-eyes” for example, where you can just feel the love and they look so endeared with the other. Both with smaller moments and bigger moments.

In these moments we can clearly see who they are looking at and reacting to, and you see them smile or react in very obvious ways. Here I can read with some confidence that these moments indicate a fondness towards the other person.

This to me is perhaps the most “heart eyes” look I have ever seen, when Jimin in Malta acts like this towards Taehyung and can’t stop touching him and has a super soft voice. His whole body language along with look and voice is just very very easy to notice. What I can read is fondness and love, but I don’t think I can know if this is explicitly romantic love or if it’s just very intense fondness that is still platonic.

Another one is when Tae is singing “Lay me down” and I could for sure go into a lot of detail on many of the behaviors and reactions we see in this whole moment, but even something as obvious as this is still just me reading into it and guessing their thoughts and feelings. (I am sorry, the gif didn’t work but I think you all know the look Jimin is giving here. In general a lot of gif won’t upload to tumblr posts, so yeah... That’s a bummer.)

Ehem, so these two moments definitely at least reads queer-platonic to me, so I am not going to lie and say no moments affect me and make me think Vmin can have something between them. But I do think looks is something that gets a bit exaggerated and that knowing exactly what a look means is more or less impossible. 

Thank you again, and sorry this might not have been what you expected. Like I said I do think there are moments that could read as something very flirty or indicate their love for each other, but that no matter how it comes across it’s too difficult to discern what reason lies behind their behavior or reactions to say it is “definitely” flirty, romantic, sexual etc.

I hope you enjoyed reading this. I could have gone into super detail of why I think Vmin’s behavior both in Run Canada and in the Lay me down clip from Malta to me are very interesting and in fact are both moments that makes me lean towards romantic feelings between Vmin, but I’ll save it for another time. ;)

(edit: I saw your reply @sweetscapri and I did think this ask being old likely could mean a changed view, especially since I have seen your replies or asks to other things regarding Vmin. But yes, indeed it's good to sometimes take a step back and look at what are facts and what are interpretations. I am glad you replied and didn't feel bad about my late answer. Thank you. 💜)

#vmin #vmin analysis #vmin heart eyes #vmin run canada #vmin malta #btsandvmin ask #btsandvmin answer #btsandvmin

[shirlleycoyle]

How 9/11 Became Fan Fiction Canon

Every fictional character you can think of has experienced 9/11 in fanfiction.

A Clone Wars veteran with two lightsabers is on United Airlines Flight 93 and prevents it from crashing. Ron and Hermione get caught up in the chaos as the towers fall. Buffy the Vampire Slayer and her friends watch the attacks unfold on TV from Sunnydale. We have spent 20 years trying to process what happened on 9/11 and its fallout, and that messy process can be tracked through the countless, sad, disturbing, and sometimes very funny fanfiction left across the internet.

Many of the fanfics written in the weeks and months following the 9/11 attacks seemed to directly respond to the news as it happened, processing the tragedy in real-time through the eyes of characters they loved. In the absence of a canon episode where Daria Morgendorffer paid respects to those lost, writing fanfic about these characters also experiencing trauma helped fans cope.

One YuGiOh fanfic published on fanfiction.net in May 2002 could have been ripped exactly from what this writer experienced that Tuesday morning. “It started as a normal day,” user Gijinka Renamon wrote. Yugi and his friends were in school, where their teacher informed them of the attacks and sent everyone home from school.

“After reading people’s 9/11 fics, I decided to write my own, and put a certain character in it. And Yugi and his pals were my first choice,” the author's note reads, explaining the connection they felt to United flight 93 and the World Trade Center attacks. Given that they lived in Pennsylvania, and “it’s close to New York, I felt really sad about it.”

Stitch, a fandom journalist for Teen Vogue, told Motherboard that this reaction to 9/11 is not at all uncommon in fandom.

"Fandom has always been a place that positions nothing as 'off limits,'" she said. "Historical tragedies like the Titanic sinking and atrocities like… all of World War 2 show up regularly across the past 30 years of people creating stories and art about the characters they love. So, on some level, it makes sense that 9/11 and the following 20-year military installation in the Middle East has joined the ranks of things people in different fandoms turn into settings for their fan fiction."

Reactions depicted in a handful of Buffy the Vampire Slayer fanfics published in the weeks after the attacks ring a little truer to the characters. “Tuesday, 11th September 2001,” written by Anna K, almost echoes the lyrics from “I’ve Got a Theory,” one of the songs in the musical episode that aired in November 2001. “We have seen the apocalypse. We have prevented it. Actually, we’ve prevented quite a few. So we know what they look like,” they write, before taking a darker turn. “They look a lot like…New York today.”

Killing demons and vampires doesn’t phase the Scooby Gang, but when preventable human death is brought into the picture, it’s gut wrenching.

“What am I supposed to do…When I can’t do anything to save the world?” Buffy cries  into Spike’s chest, watching the attacks unfold on TV in a fanfic the author described as being “about feeling numb and helpless.”

In “Blood Drive,” Kirayoshi writes about Buffy and her friends saving a van full of donated blood meant for victims of the attacks from a group of thirsty vampires. One Buffy the Vampire Slayer fic even takes a blindly patriotic turn, where noted lesbian witch Tara McClay helps Xander hang an American flag from the window of the magic shop to make Anya feel better.

Experiencing 9/11 as a young teenager was overwhelming not just because of the loss of life. Almost immediately after the event itself, it was as if the entirety of American culture re-oriented itself towards an overtly jingoistic stance. As we get distance from the attacks, seeing the tone of television and movies from the early 2000s is jarring, and some have gone viral on Twitter. In the world of pop music, mainstream musicians like the Chicks, formerly known as the Dixie Chicks, were blacklisted from the radio while Toby Keith sang about putting a boot up the ass of terrorists. On the Disney Channel, a young Shia Labeouf reading a poem he supposedly wrote about the events. The poem concludes with the line, "it's awesome to be an American citizen."

In a world so completely saturated with this messaging, it is not surprising that fanfic authors started including 9/11 in their work so soon after the event. Even The West Wing had a strange, out of continuity, fanfic-esque episode where the characters reacted to 9/11. In some cases, it made sense that the characters in the stories would be close to or a part of the events themselves.

"For characters like John Watson or Captain America, the idea works to an extent," Stitch told Motherboard. "In the original Sherlock Holmes works and the 2011 BBC series, Watson had just returned from Afghanistan. For Captain America and other Marvel heroes, 9/11 was something that was addressed in-universe in The Amazing Spider-Man volume 2 #36. Technically, 9/11 is 'canon' to the Marvel universe."

In “Early Warning: Terrorism,” a fanfiction for the TV show Early Edition in which a man who mysteriously receives tomorrow's newspaper, predicting the future, avoids jingoism, but tries to precent 9/11 from happening. This fanfic remains unfinished; it’s unclear if the characters successfully prevent 9/11 in this retelling.

Largely in fanfic from the era just after 9/11, when many young authors were trying to emotionally grapple with it, the characters don't re-write or undo the events themselves. It's this emphasis on the reaction to tragedy that colors the fanfiction that features 9/11 going forward.

Although fanfiction authors have been writing about 9/11 consistently since soon after the event, whenever that fanfiction reaches outside of its intended audience, it looks bizarre.

A screenshot of a Naruto 9/11 fanfic on the Tumblr subreddit comes without any context, or even more than two lines and an author's note. It’s impossible to suss out if this falls into the category of sincere fanfic without the rest of the piece or a publication date, but modern-day commenters on the Reddit thread see it as classic Tumblr trash.

Screenshot from r/Tumblr

“Bin Laden/Dick Cheney, enemies to lovers, 10k words, slow burn,” one user joked in the replies, underscoring the weirdness of Naruto being in the Twin Towers by comparing it to a What If story about Cheney and Bin Laden slowly falling deeply in love.

It’s hard to tell how much of the 9/11 fanfic and fanart starting a few years after the attacks is sincere, and how much of it is ironic, and trying to make fun of the very concept of writing fanfiction about 9/11.

A 2007 anime music video (in which various clips, usually from anime, are cut together to music) that combines scenes from The Lion King with Linkin Park’s “Crawling” and clips from George Bush’s speeches immediately after the attacks feels like the perfect example of this. Even the commenters can’t seem to suss out if this person is a troll or not.

There’s no way that My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic 9/11 fanart could be serious, right? Especially if the description pays tribute to “some of the nation's most memorable buildings,” and features five of the main characters as child versions of themselves. The comments again are split between users thanking the artist for a thoughtful remembrance post, and people making their own headcanon for why Twilight Sparkle is surreptitiously absent from the scene.

Screengrab via DeviantArt

There’s Phineas and Ferb fanfic that combines a 9/11 tribute concert with flashbacks to Ferb being rescued from the towers as a baby, written on the 10th anniversary of the attacks. It jumps from introspection to lines like, “‘Quiet Perry the Platypus. I’m trying to listen to these kids singing a 9/11 tribute.’”

The author's notes make it more likely that they meant for this to be a tribute piece, but it doesn’t quite make sense until watching a YouTube dramatic reading of it from 2020, fully embracing the absurdity of it all.

“For me, 9/11 is synonymous with war. It completely changed the course of my life," Dreadnought, the author of a Captain America fanfic Baghdad Waltz that sees Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes fall in love over the course of the war on terror, told Motherboard. "It’s the reason I joined the military, and I developed deep connections with people who would go on to deploy to Afghanistan and Iraq. These very much felt like my generation’s wars, perhaps because people I graduated high school with were the youngest folks eligible to serve at the time.”

Dreadnought told Motherboard that although they didn't deploy, their career has kept 9/11 and the trauma from it in their mind. After seeing that people who fantasize about Steve and Bucky getting together seemed particularly interested in reading fanfiction that related to 9/11, they decided to try their hand at it.

"I had to do something with all of that emotionally, and I’m admittedly a bit emotionally avoidant. So I learned through fic that it’s easier for me to process those feelings and the knowledge of all the awful stuff that can happen in war if I can turn it into something creative," Dreadnought said. "Give the feelings to fake people and then have those fake people give the feelings to readers!"

To Dreadnought, who is a queer man, the experience of researching and writing this was more cathartic than they first expected, especially as a way to navigate feelings about masculinity, military culture, and queer identity. But they said the research they did, which included watching footage of first responders at ground zero, was what helped them finally process the event itself.

"It was like a delayed horror, and it was more powerful than I expected it would be." Dreadnought said. "When I was eighteen, I was pretty emotionally divorced from 9/11; I just knew I wanted to do something about it. So coming back to it in my 30s while writing this fic, it was a very different experience. Even the research for this story ended up being an extraordinarily valuable exercise in cognitively and emotionally processing 9/11 and all of its second and third order effects."

Fanfiction that features 9/11 provides an outlet for people who still grapple with the trauma from that day. But Stitch warns that the dynamics of fandom and how it relates to politics can also create fiction that's less respectful and more grotesque.

"With years of distance between the stories written and the original events of 9/11, there seems to be some sort of cushion for fans who choose to use those events as a catalyst for relationships—and Iraq and Afghanistan for settings," Stitch said. "The cushion allows them room to fictionalize real world events that changed the shape of the world as we know it, but it also insulates them from having to think about what they may be putting into the world."

The tendency of turning these events into settings or backgrounds for mostly white, male characters to fall in love has the unintended effect of displacing the effects that the war on terror has had on the world over. Steve and Bucky might fall in love during the war on terror, but they would also be acting as a part of the American military in a war that has been criticized since it started. Fanfic writers in other fandoms have come under fire for using real world tragedy as settings for fic before. In the aftermath of the 2010 Haiti earthquake Supernatural fanfiction about the actors Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki going to the island to do aid became controversial within the fandom. There have also been fics where characters grapple with the death of George Floyd that is written in a way that displaces the event from the broader cultural context of race in America.

"A Captain America story where Steve Rogers is a 'regular' man who joins the US Army and 'fights for our freedom' post-9/11 is unlikely to deal with the war’s effect on locals who are subject to US military intervention," Stitch said. "It’s unlikely to sit with what Captain America has always meant and what a writer is doing by dropping Steve Rogers into a then-ongoing conflict in any capacity."

After enough time, “never forget” can even morph into “but what if it never happened?” A 19k+ word Star Wars alternate universe fanfic asks this question, wondering what would have unfolded if someone with two lightsabers was on United Flight 93. This fic, part of a larger fanfic series with its own Wikia, considers what would have happened if Earth was a military front in the Clone Wars.

In this version of events, a decorated general who served in the Clone Wars is able to take back control of Flight 93 before it crashes, landing safely and preventing even more tragedy from happening that day. In the end, all of the passengers who made harrowing last calls to their loved ones before perishing in a Pennsylvania field survive thanks to the power of the Force, and are awarded medals of honor by President Bush.

Twenty years after the attacks, it’s painful to think about what would have happened if people got to work 15 minutes later, or missed their trains that morning. There weren’t Jedi masters deployed to save people in real life, but for some of the fanfic writers working today, the world of Star Wars might feel just as removed as the world before September 11, 2001.

Fiction serves as a powerful playground for processing cultural events, especially generational trauma. The act isn't neutral though; a decade's worth of fanfiction that takes place on or around 9/11 shows how our own understanding of a traumatic event can shift with time.

How 9/11 Became Fan Fiction Canon syndicated from https://triviaqaweb.wordpress.com/feed/

[bevercges]

🐭 • So we literally know nothing about Bradley’s shenanigans between the end of Coon vs. Coon & Friends, when he left Earth to discover what happened to his home planet, and Bring the Crunch, where he states that he is living there now and doing who knows what.

Well I always wanted to write a post giving my thoughts on the subject (and I have a bit of a teaser here) so, for the sake of future RPs, I may as well do it. I will probably divide this into two posts because the Lore and my shenanigans are different things.

Just saying it now: this is mostly my own making and ideas as there’s very little canonical backing on the topic. If I have anything that I can quote to use as proof of my statements I will do it, but this is mostly my own interpretation.

Bradley Biggle has been around as a background character since Season 3, joining the main four as one of their classmates after moving to the fourth grade in Season 4. Still, until Season 14, he has been a (recognizable) background character with voice roles that could be easily counted with your hands –akin to characters like DogPoo or Kevin Stoley–.

The introductory paragraph above is a way of saying: we didn’t really know that much about Bradley until the Coon & Friends Trilogy. Hell, we still don’t, it is only on the final part of the trilogy, Coon Vs. Coon & Friends, when we learn a few things about him, and that episode starts with the video above.

“But Bradley Biggle is no ordinary fourth-grader!”

I am not going to waste time explaining why is Mintberry Crunch and what he does (for that’s what his About Page is all about) but, obviously, the entire clip is a form of foreshadowing to the ending. Spoilers to a 10-year-old episode: Bradley receives a message from outer space in which he’s told that he’s an alien from a far away planet whose destiny is to save Earth from C’thulu. Also Kenny thought that this revelation was going to be for him so he got scammed of his backstory, I guess.

So yeah, Bradley is a superhero with a backstory akin to Superman: he is an enhanced alien that was sent off to safety as a baby during times of crisis, and was found, adopted and raised by a human family, the Biggles. Yeah, I don’t think anyone really thought that Bradley and Henrietta were biological siblings, but whatever.

While we don’t know if everyone in the planet K'oh Kajan (or Kokujon, as I will be typing it like that) has the same powers as MBC, since we know that the berries of that planet “have the power to fuel nearly anything”, I’m going to take a guess that the “nearly” is there because they cannot grant superpowers to people, so Bradley is the outlier and a case of the chosen one. He is the only one with this powers, basically.

So he defeats C’thulu with his mint and berry superpowers and stuff (yes, defeats, he can only summon mint and berry to his aid, which would mostly work to reduce an opponent rather than killing them), and this episode ends with what would mark MBC’s exit from the show (outside of the very rare background appearance) for a very long time:

Canonically-speaking, this is what we know.

Bradley left to search for his biological parents (and his home planet, I suppose) and we would not hear about him for sure until Season 21. To be more precise, we would not hear about MBC’s shenanigans until his appearance in Fractured But Whole’s second DLC, Bring the Crunch.

Timestamp goes from 1:06 to 2:22 (unless you want spoilers).

Funny enough, while this would mark MBC’s return, it still does not give us much information about what he has been up to before the events pertaining this DLC. However, we still get a few clues from his in-game dialogue which I’m going to interpret for you guys.

"I picked up your distress call from the berry mines of my home planet. I've come to offer my assistance."

Something we know for sure is that he made it back to Kokujon!! This means that the main reason he has been away for so long (or so it’s my guess) is because he found his home planet, reunited with his biological parents and decided to settle there instead of returning to Earth with the Biggles. We still know that he visits, however, as he appears in Stick of Truth and in some more episodes (before disappearing again in Season 22):

We still don’t really know anything about his home planet, though, outside of very selective information he gives in and out of battle. Here’s a few examples:

"It's so weird being back on Earth. I can't believe you guys only have one sun!"

“You wanna know the best thing about Kokujon? No school."

"I didn't travel halfway across the galaxy to be treated like this."

He doesn’t live anywhere in the Solar System, that’s for sure, because not only he has traveled “across the galaxy” to respond to Fastpass’ distress call (which is another can of worms in itself, because how could have he received a call like that from literal light years away?), but also our system only has one sun.

This is just me trying to tie things together with South Park canon (so it’s a bit of a tangent), but in Season 13, in the episode Pinewood Derby, we are made aware of the existence of the Federation of Planets, a government body that is on a galactic level. The only reason I mention this is because MBC has proven to be capable of traveling at warp speed –traveling from his home planet to Earth in a matter of (what I am going to suppose were) minutes after receiving that distress call–, and all the planets that have discovered warp speed are part of the Federation, so that must be the case for Kokujon.

The exception to this rule, if anyone has watched the episode, would be Earth, but that’s because they didn’t meet the requirements to join the Federation and were blocked off the rest of the galaxy instead.

Not sure if this is canon anymore, but if it is that means that Bradley is constantly breaking the law by visiting a planet that has been labeled as off-limits, but he is not the only alien that has set foot in South Park anyways.

Actually, speaking of breaking the law and stuff, that reminds me... here is a screenshot of MBC’s character sheet:

While most characters in FBW have the Lawful (and only Lawful) alignment, MBC stands out because he has a more specific alignment. Not only he is Chaotic (which explains the possibility of him being breaking the law whenever he travels back to Earth), but also Neutral, which makes him... a morally grey character. He is neither good, neither bad, he is just... well, himself.

Why am I bringing this up anyways? Because there is one detail about the Kokujonian society that those that have played the DLC are aware about: the caste system.

"On my home planet, you'd get 10 years in the berry mines for that!"

The mention of these berry mines have been a thing ever since Season 14, but this line that can pop up when MBC is attacked in game has quite the connotations. Simple: you commit a crime, you are sent to the berry mines. You commit a crime, you work at the berry mines. You commit a crime, you become a slave. But you could say “oh, Mouse, but it could be like community service like many prisons on Earth- “ and I would have to tell you that you’re wrong because even MBC says so himself.

Despite being a trope in many sci-fi stories based around alien societies it is a very fucked up elephant in the room and everyone and their mother knows this. The last mission in the Bring the Crunch DLC involves fighting (and killing) a mind-controlling alien whose motivation was revenge against the society that put his family (and possibly his entire race to) into this position. Not only that, but if MBC is being truthful, the Kokujonian society has no issue to do the same with anyone that breaks the law, even their own people.

So, does the fact that he is part of this society make Bradley evil? No. Once again, he is Chaotic Neutral, he is just Bradley. And looking at the definition of Chaotic Neutral:

“Chaotic neutral characters like to indulge in everything.  [...]  This type of character will at least consider doing anything if they can find enjoyment or amusement.  Life has meaning, but theirs has the greatest meaning.  According to chaotic neutrals, laws and rules infringe on personal freedom and were meant to be broken.  This character is always looking for the best deal, and will work with good, neutral, or evil to get it; as long as he comes out of the situation on top.  The chaotic neutral is constantly teetering between good and evil, rebelling, and bending the law to fit his needs.”

His alignment makes him more complicated than the black-and-white idea that is being good or being evil on one fact alone. He is defined, however, by the fact that he does what he pleases regardless of what society, morality and laws say. And this is easily backed up by how he addresses the Crooked Cop enemy class in FBW:

"Earth police have no jurisdiction over... Mintberry Crunch!"

"Authority figures are no match for... the crunch!"

So, basically, his alignment makes him a free spirit and, at best, because his family owns slaves, he would be a proxy. He’s mostly a 10-year-old with superpowers that has been granted total freedom to do what he wants and takes full advantage of it (an also a superhero and an illegal alien on Earth, literally and figuratively), so he is not precisely defined by the society of his home planet. I do believe, though, that he has been influenced by the Kokujonian society as a result of living with his biological parents, so his morality and ideas flip-flop a lot.

“Chaotic neutral characters are extremely difficult to deal with. Such characters have been known to cheerfully and for no apparent purpose gamble away everything they have on the roll of a single die. They are almost totally unreliable. In fact, the only reliable thing about them is that they cannot be relied upon!”

MBC choosing to fight that alien (an alien he carelessly allowed to follow him to Earth) could also be interpreted as personal defense and him defending planet Earth from an outer space threat as the Zarganor voices his intentions pretty clearly in-battle, but everyone is welcome to draw their own conclusions since both of them were motivated by very different things.

Anyways, once again, Kokujon is a pretty fucked up planet, but it is also Bradley’s home planet. We can assume that finding this planet and his biological parents helped him discover his real identity as Gok'zarah and, once he accomplished this goal, decided that he had nothing else worth pursuing and settled. He is rather unpredictable, as his alignment dictates, so he may not even stay on Kokujon a lot and instead travels through the galaxy- but those are headcanons of mine.

In conclusion, as a TL;DR: Bradley disappeared from Season 14 to Season 21, and then from Season 22 and onwards, because he’s an alien and has chosen to live in his home planet. Said planet’s society has its fucked up side but Bradley is so unpredictable due to his free spirit nature it is hard to pin-point his morals.

Anyways, for a character that started as a joke character that was used as a deus ex machina, I think he’s pretty cool! :·D And probably one of the strongest characters in this show’s universe.

#📁 • OOC. #🍚 • Bradley!About. #🍚 • Bradley!Headcanon. #cw long post #(Though in this blog I love all of my boys this one has a weird history.) #(I still remember when I liked MBC in an ironical sense; yeah; sure.) #(Now he's just one of my favorite characters ever LOL.) #(What do you mean I shouldn't care this much about a joke character?.)

[pigstepmp3-moved]

the writers really did buck dirty in s01e02

its the post you’ve all been waiting for—my Aggravated Analysis Of Everything That Makes Me Mad about the Therapy Scene tm, now featuring some things that show just how emotionally and mentally fucked buck is. now, i know we All hate that scene with all of our hearts (buck deserves to have a Good experience w therapy for once, but thats just my opinion), but i wanna go into detail about what exactly makes me SEETHE about that scene, complete w gifs and screenshots so i can better explain myself. im putting it all under the cut bc its kind of A Lot, so click that “read more” if you wanna read my angry complaining

alright, lets set the scene (i know we’re all aware of the situation behind this scene, but i think its important to remind you all of it). season one episode two. bucks still very much a Huge horn dog. buck has also very recently suffered his First loss on the job and its taking a huge toll on him. i think what’s most important to talk about before we get to the therapy scene itself is the scene where abby’s watching him on the news with carla.

(not the greatest quality, but that doesnt matter). he very clearly looks uncomfortable just talking about what happened in such a Casual, No Pressure setting. he says, “i was just doing my job. i’m happy we were able to help the people we helped and i’m really sorry about those we couldn’t save.” he stutters a few times as he says it, looks and sounds very uneasy, which seems very out of character for him. he’s usually super confident and chill, but as he’s asked to talk about this (most likely) traumatic thing, he kinda clams up, yknow? theres also something in his voice that reminds me very heavily of the way My voice sounds when Im trying to force back tears, but that might just be The Way He Talks

another thing that he says that really stands out to me (i dont know if this is necessarily important to the topic at hand, but i wanna talk about it so whatever) is, “. . . um, i’m sure they’re just turned on by the uniform. you know, i don’t know if they would feel that way if they saw me out of it.” ignoring the more sexual connotations to what he’s saying there, let’s talk about what he most likely meant by that particular statement. he still sounds a little nervous as he says it and kind of avoids the reporters eyes. it sounds to me like this is a rare moment of buck’s insecurities being let loose. “i don’t know if they would feel that way if they saw me out of it.” this implies, i think, some insecurities about like.. every part of himself. it almost seems like, in this moment, he thinks his only redeeming quality is the uniform. which might actually be what he’s thinking right then, ‘cause he’s still trying to figure out how to cope with his first loss. i think theres some part of him, somewhere behind that overly confident persona, that has a lot more insecurities than he shows, but thats a conversation for another day.

now, let’s move on a little from that. what i think is very important and notable about that scene is some of the things abby says after watching buck on the news. first thing she says that stands out to me is, “i’ve been thinking i might want to call him to see how he is.” she’s worried about him. i think she’s probably been worried about him since the first time he was on the news, earlier that episode. and for good reasons, i think, because later on, she says, “. . . he needs help, you know? i mean, he’s got so much pain in his face. everybody’s treating him like a hero. he doesn’t feel like a hero. as far as he’s concerned, the guy that he was trying to save fell.” like, wow, just tear my heart out and stomp on it a bunch, why dont you? its such a wonderful and apt summary of what buck’s going through. to put it rather simply, he’s fucking distraught, and for good reasons. plus, that quote is one of the Big things that influenced my headcanon of buck having depression, and i could probably analyze every single scene bucks in in this episode that have added onto that head canon of mind bc there are at least a couple different things i could blather on about, but that’s some analysis for another post (if you’re interested in me talking about that tho, definitely feel free to let me know)

now, let’s move on a little further to the Dreaded Scene (i’d totally go into the scene that immediately follows the last one i talked about, where buck and abby are speaking on the phone, but i think i’ve emphasized my point of buck going through some shit in this episode to the point where that isn’t strictly necessary). for the rest of this post, i’m gonna kind of analyze every single little thing that buck does and says in the therapy scene bc pretty much all of it contributes to my burning hatred of that therapist.

like, yeah, no SHIT, honey!! as far as we, the audience, are concerned, this is the First time he’s EVER been to therapy. in my own personal experiences, my first time going to therapy was SO uncomfortable. and just looking at buck right here makes me feel uncomfortable, too—he’s fidgeting with his hands, looks to the side, looks down, looks up at her for a moment before looking away again. this boy looks nervous as hell, and for good reasons. he confirms that he is in fact uncomfortable, and then the therapist says, “well, that’s not unusual. you’ve been through a trauma. that’s why you’re here—to deal with those feelings.” remember that, because i’m not gonna go into the importance of that quote just yet.

the next thing buck says is, “uh, yeah, i’m, uh, i’m not really into feelings.” he kind of avoids looking at the therapist as he says this, though not as much as he did in that last gif. but his voice is like... uncharacteristically quiet as he says it.

more!! avoidance!! he keeps averting his eyes, looking anywhere that ISNT his therapist. and at the end of what he says here, he clenches his jaw a little. a nervous tick, maybe? i don’t know. as he talks here, though, his voice is, yet again, very quiet. he sounds just about broken right here, and it makes my heart ache so bad for him

after a brief break to check out what athena and michael are talking about, his therapist says, "i treat a lot of first responders—people who run toward danger—but maybe there's something you're running from as well? what is it about discussing your feelings that scares you?" the answer buck gives her? a very defensive, “i’m not scared.” if youre not scared, then why are you avoiding talking about your damn feelings like the fucking black plague? and when i say that he says it defensively, i mean, like, way too defensive to Not be suspicious

we don’t get to hear anymore about that particular question because next, we’re checking up on athena and michael again, and then we’re talking about something else. the therapist says, "you lost somebody. that's hard."

as he says this, he sounds fucking SAD. he sounds completely and utterly BROKEN. throughout this whole clip, he sounds entirely broken. the therapist asks if this was his first time. he responds with, "i mean, i've had calls where it was... too late, but, uh, but i've only been doing this not even six months. now, i... i just can't shake the feeling that this one didn't need to go down the way that it did." again, he sounds like he’s hurting really badly. this loss is really taking a huge toll on him and that is Very clear. she then asks him if he thinks there was something he could have differently. he doesnt respond, just looks up at her like this:

his eyes are a little red, and it looks like there are some tears in his eyes. like wow, you could murder me and it would hurt less than seeing buck like this

now, the next snippet is about where everything Starts Going To Shit (this is also the part where i start sobbing like a dumb baby, but thats neither here nor there). 

you see that shit right there?? if you listen hard enough, you can hear my heart breaking into a million pieces. from this point on, buck is CRYING. honest to god fucking CRYING. he looks like he’s hurting so badly, especially at the end of that gif, when he furrows his eyebrows. it looks kind of like he’s trying to keep himself from straight up Sobbing. i’m sure it seems almost like i’m dwelling on this for a little longer than necessary, but i think emphasizing how emotional he is in this part is very important to understand just how much the end of this scene makes me fucking SEETHE. this next little bit is where i start to transition from Sadness to absolute Rage

you see that? this is the start of my slow deterioration into madness. up until this point, everything about this therapy session was completely and entirely professional. but home girl decides, hey, yknow whats a good idea? waltzing my happy ass across the room, sitting down directly in front of my PATIENT, and resting my hand on said PATIENT’s arm. i dunno about you guys, but this seems terrible on so many levels that it isnt funny.

now, yknow what happens next? some classic avoidance from our boy. she calls him mr buckley, so he says, "it's, um... it's actually just buck." (after VERY AUDIBLY SNIFFLING by the way, but i digress). he then deflects even FURTHER by asking her if she friended him on facebook. 

“i thought you looked familiar,” he says. he’s no longer actively crying at this point, but there are most certainly still some tears in his eyes.

now, do you know what happens next, after a brief break to check up on athena and michael? the worst thing that could happen happens! i know it, you know it, little miss unprofessional sleeps with buck! and yknow what she says Immediately afterwards? “i can’t believe i just did that. i am so sorry.” like.... no! saying “sorry” doesnt change the fact that you TOOK ADVANTAGE of someone who is CLEARLY not in the right frame of mind to consent to something like that. yknow what he was doing the last time we saw him? crying. bc hes in a very vulnerable place in this episode. and yeah, sure, i guess you could make the argument that he was seducing her a little, but that doesnt change the fact that this is fucked up. now, side note about me, i’m only in high school and i’ve never had any job before, so i dont quite know the ins and outs of the professional world. but i do know a thing or two about common sense, so its pretty easy for me to assume that shit like this is awful on like a million different levels. i think the power imbalance is super clear to anyone who has any number of brain cells.

now, buck being as emotionally stunted as he is, says that she made him feel better (probably just for a few minutes, but thats neither here nor there). and yknow what she says? “you should go.” remember that quote from earlier? the one that i said was important and that i was going to go into later? “well, that’s not unusual. you’ve been through a trauma. that’s why you’re here—to deal with those feelings.” yknow what buck Didnt do? deal with those feelings. he talked about his feelings for maybe ten minutes, and that’s assuming that, during the cuts to athena and michael, the session was continuing and that it wasnt a matter of like, oh, this stuff is happening At The Same Time.

and all that is just During the session. we dont ever see the aftermath of it, we dont ever see buck talking about that session or anything along those lines. and we most certainly dont see him trying to go talk to a different therapist. the rest of what im going to be talking about this post is purely speculation, but i think its highly probable that this could all be canon. like i just mentioned, as far as we know, buck hasnt gone to another therapist after that shit show. additionally, we can also assume that buck really hasnt talked to like....... anyone about the shit he’s gone through, both past shit and shit that was brought up from this first loss of his. so as far as we’re concerned, he’s never properly worked through it all. he’s also probably never gotten any proper coping mechanisms to deal with any further losses. it seems a little too morbid to think that bucks just gotten used to the feeling that comes with losing someone, so i think its pretty safe to assume that, after every single loss he suffers, he gets like..... super fucked up, purely because he never talked about (a), the reason why hes scared to talk about feelings, or (b), how to deal with said feelings, especially when they’re bad. and thats not fair to him!! that loss clearly took a huge toll on buck, Most of the description of that episode is talking about the roller coaster and bucks feelings, but he never got to heal from it. if buck doesnt get something akin to a redemption arc, where he gets to see a therapist to properly work through all of his issues, i’m going to riot

anyway. thats all i have to say on the matter. i’ve been working on this for most of the day because i have so many thoughts and feelings about the way buck was treated during this episode. i will die mad about it. but i think i’ve said pretty much all i have to say on the topic now, so i hope my frustrated rambling was interesting or whatever to read. so, thanks for reading! ♥

#evan buckley #buck buckley #911 fox #911 on fox #lemme know if there are any errors or anything? im not proof reading this bc im much too lazy and bc i just wanna post this shit already #kendall blabbers #(maybe i should make a tag eventually just for ranting like this. i dunno. we'll see)

[sujus-girl]

Disclaimer: This is just for fun, so please don’t take it too seriously. This is not an official profile or anything like that!

A GUIDE TO PENTAGON

I actually had a lot of fun making my guide to JBJ, so I was like?? What other group do I love that doesn’t get the attention they deserve? …. PENTAGON

Are y’all ready to cringe? To sigh? To question what is going on with these children? Then, without further ado, I present to you: Pentagon: My Shitty Guide to 10 Toddlers

Group Name: Pentagon

First appeared on a show called Pentagon Maker, which was called a survival show, but SPOILER ALERT: Cube decided to do the right thing and debuted all 10 members together

If I’m going to be 100% honest, I still dk where to find the full episodes, but there are a ton of clips on youtube, and, honestly, I was satisfied with just watching those

ALL OF THEM HAVE REALLY GOOD VISUALS? LIKE, I SAY THIS WITH EVERY GROUP, BUT SERIOUSLY, PENTAGON HAS SOME A+++ VISUALS

Beware because they’re very. Very. very. Loud

The fandom name is universe and i just think that’s so cute OKAY?

Ofiicial Music Videos: Gorilla, Can You Feel It, Critical Beauty, Pretty Pretty, Run Away, Like This, Violet

Personal Favorite Non-Title Tracks: Thank You, Beautiful, You Are, Spectacular, and Lose yourself

Aight, we have ten members to go through this time, so BUCKLE UP, MY FRIENDS

Members:

Jo Jinho

The oldest member of pentagon

Vvv smol baby. Is only 5’6”

Is scared very easily lmfao

May be smol but has A HELLA SET OF LUNGS

High note king that leaves almost everyone shook

Used to be in SM the Ballad, but left and became a trainee again under cube entertainment

Had trained for EIGHT FRICKIN YEARS, DO NOT SLEEP ON MY BOI

I guess he gave vocal lessons to cube trainees like Yoo Seonho (someone pls KINDLY let me know if i’m wrong)

Drops a bunch of covers and spoils Universe with his voice, thx boo

Usually gets paired with hongseok for stuff?? Idk

Has a room by himself in the dorms, lucky boi

ALSO A MUSICAL THEATER ACTOR?? ALL SHOOK UP REALLY HAD US ALL SHOOK UP

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Lee HwiTaek (Hui)

The leader of this mess

Got pretty popular after the song Never was released, then continue to leave people quaking after Energetic was released

Is an A+ Singer and Producer, we love a talented man

Is vvvv scared of everything and also has a lot of tears (we love a man in touch with his emotions)

A former JYP trainee

Got7’s JB said that one time, Got7’s Mark got into a fight with him, Hui, and B.A.P.’s Youngjae and Day6’s Brian had to translate the argument LOL

Also in a subunit called Triple H that consists of him, E’Dawn and Hyuna

Also has a room to himself

HONEY SOCKS

Has a fanboy named Yoo Seonho that loves him vvv much, and they even went to vietnam together

also appeared on this variety show called hyena’s on the keys and flaunted his composing SKILZ

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Yang Hongseok

A former YG trainee

Was on the show that created iKon, and it was…. Oof

He was new at the time, so it was kinda awkward and tense, but it got better

Is obsessed with working out, and has the abs of a greek god as a result

Reads books in his free time, and enjoys studying foreign languages

He moved around when he was younger, so he can speak Mandarin and English (we love an intelligent man)

Apparently the mom?? Cooks and cleans for the babies in the dorm

Shares a room with E’Dawn

Also really likes Iron Man… and Jinho

The members say he’s the worst at dancing in the group LOL

It’s okay though, cause he’s vvv talented in other aspects

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Kim HyoJung (E’Dawn)

“I have no fear” not even two seconds later *HIGH PITCH SCREAMING*

Can reach an octave i didn’t think human possible

A little weird, but that’s okay!

Is also in Triple H with Hui and Hyuna

Hongseok’s roommate

Is really good at dancing, wow

Kinda looks tired 24/7, but we’re pretty sure that’s just his face. Like you know how some people have resting bitch face? E’Dawn has resting tired face.

TATTOOS!

Sry, i just really like tattoos, lol

But yeah! E’Dawn has multiple tattoos! Since it’s like 1 in the morning and I’m kinda tired, I’m not gonna try and think of all of them, but they should all show up if you just google e’dawn tattoos lol sorry

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Go Shinwon

Has trouble keeping his clothes on apparently

Like for real, just casually pulled his pants down and took his shirt off multiple times in pentagon maker

Is scared of animals because one time because… um…. let’s just say that there was an unfortunate incident with his pet hamster when he was in like middle school... yeah

Was eliminated during Pentagon maker, but four remaining members broke into cube late at night and put up posters saying they wanted pentagon to debut as ten

Gets mad real easily

Has broad shoulders… Like real broad. Edawn and yanan fell asleep on his shoulders and they were comfortable

Shares a room with Kino

Also really likes Mcdonalds?? Like, this boy put on a burger hat and ate a mcdonalds burger.

Really hates bugs LOL

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Yeo Changgu (Yeo One)

Has a visual that a lot of foreigners seem to really like? That’s just something I noticed, I know it’s not the general consensus

Is also an actor, he appeared in a webdrama called Spark and was the main actor for a historical drama not too long ago

Shares a room with yanan

Is yanan’s biggest fan

Has a laugh that can revive wilting flowers tbh

Talks a lot too

Sucks at table tennis

He and hui put ducktape on their legs and ripped it off

GIVE HIM MORE LINES PLS

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Yan An

“MADE IN CHINA!”

“Annyeong chingudel”

He’s from Shanghai

Hella model vibes, amirite or amirite

He injured himself when preparing for the Ceremony album, and he had to sit out and everyone was vvv sad and vvv worried

Got better and is back, and more random than ever

Sometimes says things that are real funny, even if he doesn’t intend for it to be

“What are you talking about, this is plastic”

“You… You’re in big trouble!”

“Korean name is Yanan. Chinese name is Yanan. English Name? Yanan.”

Also once called Jinho a foreigner, even tho Jinho is Korean and they were in Korea?

May be tol and handsome, but he’s really just a big toddler

Scared of roller coasters

Roommates with yeo one who loves him v much (yeo one has the right idea, y’all)

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Adachi Yuto

“YUTODA”

A japanese prince

AN ATHLETE! Played baseball and used to do soccer

A former JYP trainee

Good friends with Yuto (U) from ONF because they both used to be JYP trainees and also NCT’s Yuta

Shares a room with Wooseok and will laugh at anything he says

Milk couple

Can’t eat spicy food for shit

Hella tall

Also appeared predebut at ISAC 2015 for futsall

A bby that is afraid of many things. Especially the dark. On pentagon maker, the crew turned off the lights and he real cutely went “pd-nim~” and i almost cried it was so cute

“What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?” “Ice cream.”

Says he can’t do aegyo, but he hella cute already, so it’s okay

Also once danced shirtless and i almost sued, you a child Boi (i say as I am younger than him)

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Kang Hyunggu (Kino)

A whole cutie

I legit that he was my age or younger cause he was just so adorable

Only 4 days younger than yuto and 4 days older than wooseok, but he a whole baby

They did a vlive for wooseok, yuto, and kino’s birthdays and when they were getting into teams, hongseok was chosen to be in kino’s team but he said it so emotionlessly that kino got all pouty LOL

A dancing king

“I was going to go easy on you, but you called me Hyunggu”

Has a lot of friends in k-pop, he vvv popular

Shares a room with shinwon

A laugh that motivates me to be a better person

Saved the entire world by eating watermelon in front of cameras BLESS

“Get it Kino Beauty”

Proceeded to destroy yanan’s face with makeup RIP

Makes funny faces that i sometimes screenshot and send to my friends at 2 in the morning

ALSOALSOALSO, he had this little dance solo in Critical Beauty and I was LIVING for it

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Jung Wooseok

The baby of the group

HELLA TOL??? LIKE WTF, IF YOU LOOK AT PHOTOS OF JINHO AND WOOSEOK STANDING NEXT TO EACH OTHER HE LOOKS LIKE A FREAKING GIRAFFE

He was sleeping backstage once and yuto put a chocopie in front of his mouth and he sleepily tried to eat it and i was :((((( he was so cute

Really likes yuto, they’re usually paired together for stuff. Like dorms

Really likes anime, legend has it that if you play samurai heart at exactly 1:23 AM, wooseok will appear behind you and sing along

Imitates an opera singer and achieves an octave that i would imagine isn’t humanly possible for someone with a voice as deep as his

Has a fanboy names Lai Guanlin from wanna one, and he will not let anyone forget about his precious Wooseok

Once did an eating broadcast with super spicy food and accidentally got some in his eye and the rest of pentagon thought it was the funniest thing ever RIP

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

That was a journey! We’re almost done, though!

Videos Of Pentagon to Watch! Weekly Idol with Victon and Momoland! (X) This crack (?) series that I live for (X) The VLive that was all sorts of mess (X) Triple H Weekly Idol (only Hui and E’Dawn) (X) This clip from Pentagon Maker that was all sorts of mess, even with only 4 members (X) Hui, Wooseok, and E’Dawn trying to cook (X) This other VLive that was all sorts of mess (X) Pentagon Heyo TV (Mafia Game Cut) (X)

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT! A VERY SHORT, SHITTY GUIDE TO PENTAGON! I hope this helps anyone wanting to get into Pentagon, or even just makes an Universe smile! Now go and bask in the glory that is Pentagon’s craziness! Bye!

#pentagon #jo jinho #lee hwitaek #hui #kim hyojung #e'dawn #yang hongseok #yeo changgu #yeo one #yanan #adachi yuto #kino #kang hyunggu #jung wooseok #triple h #cube #mine

[signor-signor]

Greetings! After seeing my name in the description, you might recognize me on Twitter and Facebook. So, let me give you readers the rundown of the (Walt) Disney TV Animation resurgence:

Animated series that first aired on Disney Channel…

Phineas and Ferb, 
4 Seasons, 
222 Episodes, 
Loose ends tied: Yes - We know how the titular stepbrothers came to be, when they adopted Perry the Platypus, and what made Dr. Doofenshmirtz tick before abandoning the life of evil and becoming a member of OWCA. We also got to learn more about the commonly seen characters and watch Candace go from trying to bust her brothers to having a friendly chat with them and their friends at the end of the last day of summer.

Fish Hooks, 
3 Seasons, 
110 Episodes, 
Loose ends tied: Pretty much - It’s about small aquatic creatures during high school years at a pet shop, so it makes sense to start with picture day and end with a graduation. Plus, the connection between Bea and Oscar that we’ve looked into in the beginning becomes romantic at the very end. No cliffhanger to be seen, so there’s no turning back. Besides, it wasn’t really popular enough to have merchandise.

Gravity Falls, 
2 Seasons (That’s exactly what was planned.), 
40 Episodes (No plans to continue it - what more do they want?!), 
Loose ends tied: Yes - I cannot emphasize the answer enough. The origin story of the two Stans’ involvement in the mystery of the titular town is revealed, Dipper and Mabel go from preteens to teens and experience some life-changing moments, Bill Cipher, the true main antagonist of the show, is eradicated, Soos goes from repairman to manager of the Mystery Shack, and Stanley (Grunkle Stan) and Stanford (Grunkle Ford) make amends before going on adventures together. And did I mention the whole show takes place during summer vacation? What’s more, it has a beginning, a middle, AND an end.

Wander Over Yonder (first aired on Disney Channel before being moved to Disney XD after first few episodes of S1), 
2 Seasons (so far), 
79 Episodes (plus 11 1-minute shorts between S1 and S2), 
Loose ends tied: N, O, no. For the life of me, I cannot understand why most Disney XD viewers, especially GF fans, would avoid watching it - it’s created by Craig McCracken, the same genius who brought up two hit shows on Cartoon Network. Sure, Lord Hater stopped Lord Dominator and saved the galaxy so he could conquer it just as it’s being restored, but the animatic in the S2 finale heavily implies that Craig and his crew were not done telling the whole story. Although we do know why Wander seeks to help, how he and Sylvia met, and what motivated Lord Hater to get into villainy, there are other things that have not been covered as of today. Where did Hater come from? When did Commander Peepers and the Watchdogs start working for him? What’s in store for the extraterrestrial formerly known as Lord Dominator? What’s worse than galactic destruction? Who put the bounty on Wander before Sylvia went from bad to good? And although we know Stella Starbella, Ripov, and Major Threat have ships, the ships’ whereabouts remain unclear, so we can’t expect the galaxy’s inhabitants to remain stuck on the (formerly) secret planet, right?
The bottom line: Wander’s mission of befriending Lord Hater is not yet accomplished.

What else? There are other cartoons exclusive to Disney XD I thought I’d mention. They were around before I got word of the bad news about WOY.

The 7D - Although it supposedly takes place in an alternate universe, it’s still very enjoyable. You can’t go wrong with a cartoon with references to fairy tales and nursery rhymes. No particular story arc to be had, though.

Penn Zero: Part-Time Hero - This amazingly animated show has a pretty cool concept of filling in for heroes and villains in different dimensions. Like WOY, it doesn’t get the same amount of respect GF gets. Fortunately for the fans, it got a much needed satisfactory ending.

Star vs. the Forces of Evil - Nowadays, I think of it as the new Phineas and Ferb (with its slated total of 4 seasons) or the new Gravity Falls (since it’s being treated as Disney XD’s flagship show). This, P&F, and GF are considered more profitable than many other shows (yes, that includes the creative, clever, funny ones, like WOY), which is why you’ll see them every week.

Pickle and Peanut - I wasn’t sure how it would fit in with the entire Disney library when I first watched an episode or two, and it already has two seasons. I got word that all will be said and done after the second season, so I’m sure a lot of people will be none the sadder and neither will those who do like it, since the definite ending was put into effect.

Truth be told, unless you’re Dan Povenmire, (P&F, Milo Murphy’s Law), Jeff (Swampy) Marsh (also P&F, MML), Alex Hirsch (GF), Daron Nefcy (SvtFoE), or some other creator of an animated series that Disney seems to like best, you might not stand a chance in the business of Disney TV Animation (or Disney TV in general). As a Cast Member of Disneyland, however, I make it my mission to make The Walt Disney Company much more enjoyable and respectable. If it weren’t for Wander Over Yonder’s influence on me, I wouldn’t have gotten into the Disney College Program.

I have an account on Tumblr because my contribution to the SaveWOY campaign needs to be bigger. Also, there are still many other people who have absolutely no knowledge of Wander Over Yonder, and even if they did, most of them wouldn’t do a thing to save it. Thankfully, we have a petition nearing 50,000 signatures to get Disney executives to change their minds. For the past 18 months, I’ve put up with that one cliffhanger, so I’ll do what I can to motivate other Wander fans (and non-fans) to try even harder to persuade Disney to give WOY one more season. You won’t be getting clips, screenshots, or GIFs from me, but I’m always here to provide analysis, logic, and fan material whenever necessary.

I am well aware of @crackmccraigen’s status with Disney - he’s worked on a pilot for his fourth show, which is said to be inspired by Peanuts, Dennis the Menace, and Tintin, but there’s no telling if it’ll be picked up. And with some of the other folks involved in WOY still working on Disney-related material, namely @suspendersofdisbelief, @owner-of-wendys, @atalkingmagpie, and @noveltymusicservices, everyone associated with SaveWOY will do whatever it takes to succeed. Even if we end up getting half-hour/4 quarters/half-hour/4 quarters/half-hour/4 quarters/hour, we’ll be happy, just as long as the show gets closure Craig’s way and not Disney’s way.

Count me in, @peepsqueak!

#Wander Over Yonder #SaveWOY #Disney Channel #Disney XD #Disney TVA

[giasonesdream]

Track Your Fic’s Success on AO3

Fanfic Writing on AO3 (for ARMYS)

I'm not sure why I felt the need to make this, but I have heard writers talk about this topic before, of not getting much traction on their fics. There's a part of it that really does fall on the readers, but this is a post to maybe help get you on the right path or maybe change your perspective on the stats given to you (aka kudos, hits, comments, etc).

The 10% Idea

Basically, this is just something to keep in mind if you see that there aren't many kudos on your story.

I used to have a friend that said pretty much this: If the amount of kudos is 10% of the amount of hits you have, then it's deemed a good fic. That is to say, even if your story only gets 50 kudos out of 500 people that read it, you're in the clear.

I'll be using screenshots of my own works as example because I have a range of decently well-received stories to not well received at all.

So this one has almost exactly 10% the amount of kudos.

This, which has only a whopping 5 kudos is in the 10% (it’s actually not it’s 2am and my brain is shitting itself but I’m gonna make a point with this one regardless so leave my math error alone}

Meanwhile, this fic only has 55 kudos even though, presumably, over 2k people read it.

There are a few things that should be taken into consideration here:

THE SHIP: it's no shock to anyone -especially writers- that there are favoured ships in our fandom. Taekook and Jikook take the first place spot followed by Yoonmin (this one actually was named the top ship on all of ao3 a couple years ago!) along with yoonseok/sope maybe Namjin? This is all to say, if you write about a ship that isn't necessarily popular, not many people will read your work. That isn't to say that you should only write for certain ships. Please write what you want and what you feel! I cannot stress enough that all of this should be for fun or maybe even practice if writing is your passion.

But let’s look back at the three fics I pointed out. The first one with 400 kudos is taekook, so it had a better chance of getting seen by more people. In fact, 4k people clicked on it and potentially read that story...but the next fic with only 5 kudos is yoonmin. Aren’t they a popular ship? Why did only 100 people read it? And vhope isn’t necessarily a popular ship now (it had its time earlier on back when Rookie King came out, and the veterans for that ship are still fighting, me included!) but 2k people clicked on that and only 55 of those 2k liked it enough to leave a kudos. So, if it’s not the ship, what else could it be?

THE TAGS: tagging a story is very detrimental when posting on a site like this or any other, really. Many people like to narrow their searches down based on the criteria. Being able to filter what fics a person sees can make or break a work’s traction. My yoonmin story is a horror fic, and I’m sure there aren’t very many readers looking to get scared. As an avid reader myself, there is no denying that I -as well as many other readers- are interested in reading smut. Whether it be a one shot that’s quick and easy, or maybe it’s a slow-burn that tallies up to just being a written rom-com series, if you specify in the tags that smut is in this story, people are more willing to give it a try. For the vhope fic, I didn’t mention smut, but I did put in the tags some subgenres of smut. You can’t have “over stimulation” without sex, right? 

But, again, I feel the need to stress this: do not write smut if you are not comfortable with it! Despite the fact that a lot of us are thirsty, shameless fiends, there about just as many people that are only here for the cutesy, lovey-dovey shit. That taekook fic doesn’t have any sex in it, nor did I ever mention that there was a possibility of sex. It doesn’t go past being flirty in the span of 2k words. So, then, if a fic with a popular ship can do well without having sex in it, what else is making people click on it?

THE SUMMARY: I...am such a huge advocate for summaries. There’s a nice fine line between going into too much detail or not enough. This is why I normally go the route of putting in an excerpt from the story and then add a TLDR (Too Long Don’t Read) in the form of an “OR” followed by an incredibly oversimplified idea of what the story is about. As you can see, I didn’t do that for the yoonmin fic. I only put in an excerpt that -quite frankly- is boring narrative. The reason as to why I chose that in the first place is because the horror aspect of the fic is where any dialogue comes in- which brings me to the next point!

This could just be me, but I do tend to click on stories that have dialogue in the summary. This is going to depend on if the reader cares more about dialogue or narration, but think of the story as if it were a new movie coming out or preview to a new episode of a show. Do these videos only broadcast the actors simply moving around? No, they like to add in clips from scenes, use dialogue where you can sort of understand what the context of the scene might be, but not enough context so you’ll want to watch and see what the fuck they’re talking about.

So, if you’ve gotten to this part, you have probably realized that all I did was just tell you how you can market your writing so that more people will click on it and possibly read it all the way through. And really, these aren’t necessarily sure, guaranteed ways of becoming the next “The Fic” in our fandom, but I can assure that just taking more time to consider these aspects can allow you to contemplate what works for you as well as the audience. 

That’s that on that. The next thing I want to talk about some stuff I didn’t cover that are just as important:

Comments (and Bookmarks)

This is probably the biggest thing I ever hear/read/see artists of any sort complain about. And with good reason! As a writer, it truly does wonders to get feedback of almost any sort, even if it’s just a critique on how something was worded. Comments mean that we’re not just throwing our art out into a vast void. Effort was put into the art we created, so if you enjoyed it, effort put into commenting is much appreciated. But this isn’t another rant begging the audience to please just let us know how you felt. No, I’m here to mention that we should not let the number of kudos overshadow the interactions.

More examples. And keep in mind that taekook fic. Feel free to scroll back up and look at the amount of comments on that work. Now take a look at these:

So, 8.1k read this fic...and only 250 people liked it...but boy did this story cause some sort of reaction because people W E N T O F F! And rest assured, none of the comments were necessarily negative. The majority of them are just people being like “wha- how could they >.<”

Everything seems to be pretty even across the board. 2.6k readers, 220 kudos, about 20 or so comments (that’s excluding my replies). 

As I mentioned before, comments are so important. The taekook fic I wrote that seemed to garner enough traction where 4k people read it and 400 people liked it enough to leave a kudos, only a handful of those readers left a comment. It kinda makes me think of instagram. How strange does it look if a picture gets 10k likes but only has maybe 10 or 20 comments. Something seems a bit off, doesn’t it? I can see how this sounds entitled, but my sole purpose in bringing this up is because those numbers can be discouraging. And I want to stress how important it is to look at your works, cherish the comments you get even if the number of hearts seems low in comparison. Some of my most heartfelt comments are on that Taegi fic just above. And it makes them all the more special because this has been my favourite story to write. So even though not many have read it (whether it be because the ship isn’t popular or I didn’t do a good job of summarizing the fic where it seemed interesting) the people that clicked on an liked it felt the need to comment some absolutely amazing words. And those are the comments that should keep you going and growing.

I’ll also just add this little tidbit because it wasn’t something I noticed until recently, you should also check the bookmarks. People are able to leave comments and tags in their bookmarks, and I believe those to be extensions of comments. Not only did people feel like saving this work you wrote, but they might just let out some of their feelings in the tags, like the tags section of a tumblr post or the comment on a retweet.

There is no rule or formula that I particularly know of for getting more comments -aside from using the note section to say “let me know what you think” or “comments are always appreciated!”. I think this aspect somewhat depends on the story itself. That taekook fic I wrote is probably one of the more “cookie-cutter” things I have written. Tropes are great, they normally have a plot and formula that people can follow and know what’s going to happen. And they’re tropes for a reason: they’re common and entertaining. I know I don’t always like to go the route of writing tropes. I have accepted that the style in which I write is not always catered towards the general audience, but that is completely okay!

As I said before, this is for fun. You write because you have a story you want to tell, and you feel so passionately about it that you take the time and effort to write it. If my numbers have proven anything, it’s that your fics will find their niche. It’s always going to fit someone. And it’s important to really appreciate those that seem to like what you’re writing, even if the greater audience doesn’t vibe with it.

And that’s that on that.

So, since we’ve gone over all this, I just wanted to say that I am open to helping writers. I know this post probably isn’t the best representation, but I’m pretty damn good at spelling and grammar. I’m not a novelist, don’t have any published works floating anywhere on the New York Times Best Seller list, but I have been writing since I was seven years old. With fifteen years of experience and having worked with authors in the past on potential books, I am always more than happy to pass on any knowledge I have gained over the years. If it’s wording something to make it flow better, trying to fill any plot holes or answer questions of character motivations, of if you should be using “there”, “they’re”, or “their”, I would love to help. All ya gotta do is message me :)

*mic drop*

#bts fic #bts smut #bts army #bts fanfiction #i would love to help with tumblr but fuck i don't even know anymore #bts imagines #just trying to call upon our fic writers

[r-o-se]

A summary on Produce 101 Season 2 Episode 8 its ya boy back at it agian with another let’s play this time its evaluations and painful crying time

1.     BOA GOT THEM FOOD SHE GOT EVERYONE PIZZA

2.     Physically restraining myself from screenshotting everything Jinwoo appears in and posting those as the best moments

3.     They show the winners of each category again aka Taehyun, Jonghyun and Gunhee

4.     Sfkdjhlajk who said that those clips of hugging crying trainees are acceptable

5.     Seonho keeps saying 1, 2, 3 and looking at Guanlin as if he wants him to say ‘fighting’ but none of them will say it lmao I love my dumb chicks

6.     They showed solo clips of both Daniel and Jisung but not Jinwoo haha nice ;)

7.     Kiiahoiadjh Hyunbins failed b-boying how beautiful

8.     I am not emotionally prepared for this Jinwoo won’t make it I have too many goddamn faves just stab me

9.     Ok they’re showing concept evaluation stuff first this is basically like last season

10.  Im crying Jonghyun is 1st and BoA publically thanked him he is so shy and aaaaaaaahhhhh

11.  Ok the voters choose the best team and the idol that suits the concept best, most voted team gets FUCKING 220 000 VOTES!!! THE FUCK!! And the trainee who gets the most votes out of the team gets 100k votes, the rest from that team get 20k

12.  And here we gooooooooo the producers, first, Shihn Hyuk one did stuff for SHINEE!!!!!!!!! And also EXO and Justin Bieber I guess lol his song is ‘I Know You Know’

13.  Kigen & Assbrass from Monsta X next, they wrote hiphop song ‘Oh Little Girl’

14.  Ren’s visuals are done so dirty in this show I swear to god

15.  Next comes Geunwoo, ASHTRAY and Oh Seonghwan from Kyuhyun and Yesung who wrote a nu disco genre song ‘Showtime’ and LMAO THE CHOREO FOR IT HAS DONGMYEONG’S SIGNATURE DANCE AAAHAHAHAH POOR PLAGIARIZED ELIMINATED BABY

16.  Now composers called Devine-Channel who did songs for VIXX!!!! and BTS and their contribution is a Future EDM song ‘Open Up’

17.  TRIPLE H WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCKKKKKK THEY MADE A SONG

18.  It’s a Deep House genre song called ‘Never’

19.  Overall, Open Up and Never sound the best imo holy fuckkkkk those songs are LIT AS HELL

20.  Danik, Dongbin and Kiwon did the unthinkable and hinted at the songs they want and as a penalty they get sorted last

21.  I know Daniel wanted the fourth song which makes me emo bc I LOVE THAT SONG!!!! SO MUCH!!!!!! And now he cant get it lmao dumb boyo

22.  They look so ashamed aw

23.  Now everyone are getting sorted to songs, Baekho first aaaaaaand they didn’t show us what he got I don’t think they show any songs before the teams are full agh

24.  Everyone get their songs one but one and the reactions vary from jumping to absolute neutrality lol I’m not gonna say all of their names

25.  BoA brought up Samuels 15 place rank drop Kindly Shut Up Please

26.  Samuel, Sanggyun and Namhyung are all in one group

27.  Jaehwan also chose Hyunbin as the one he doesn’t want to be in a group with since he has already been with him twice aaaaaahahahhahah

28.  Jaehwan DOES want to be with Jonghyun and so do Baekho and Yongguk as well EVERYONE LOVES HIM THIS IS SO CUTEEEE

29.  JONGHYUN IS WITH JAEHWAN AND THEY HUG RIGHT AWAY!! CUTE!!

30.  Winkdeep are the only ones in their practice room well nvm THAT’S HYUNGSEOB all the cute popular visual ones are together again

31.  Taehyun joined the badassery that is Samuel, Namhyung, Sangbin and Sanggyun and Samuel IMMEDIATELY goes like OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! SAME THO FUCK I LOVE TAEHYUN

32.  ???? Woodam went to the badasses room?? GOOD CONCEPT!!!

33.  Jihoon is discussing his endless aegyo techniques

34.  IT IS GUNHEE IN THE ROOM OF CUTIES!!! AND SUUNGWOON WITH JR

35.  The Sinners are all in that room and give their formal apologies aw kiddos it’s ok I don’t care lol

36.  Danik goes to the practice room where JINWOO IS!!!!!! YES!!!!AND SO DOES KIWON!

37.  Dongbin is with the cutie group lol

38.  The song for the badassery group is SHOW TIME!! Sangbin is dead inside but Samuel just gave a kiss to the song sign lmaooo

39.  Jonghyun group gets Never also HOLY SHIT this team has Jonghyun, Minhyun, Jaehwan and Seongwoo are all here it is like 2/3 of Sorry Sorry lol

40.  The cutie team gets Oh Little Girl  Justin looks so blessed out of this world and hugs w Hyunngseob YUEHUA PRIDE!!!!!

41.  All other group want open up lol

42.  Danik-Baekho group GETS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

43.  So the other group gets I Know You Know everyone are crying inside

44.  The temporary centers for Oh Little Girl are chosen now, Ren, Jihoon and Euiwoong all want to be center

45.  They are trying out and honestly I have such second hand embarrassment rn but everyone think Jihoon and Minki were better including Hyungseob whos labelmates with Euiwoong

46.  Wait so… Jungjung, Euiwoong, Justin and Hyungseob are ALL in the Oh Little Girl group damn whole Yuehua squad here

47.  KAHI JUST BOUGHT THIS YUEHUA THING UP!!! I SAW IT BEFORE!!!

48.  Euiwoong was really worried about doing mistakes but KAHI CONGRATULATED HIM BC HE DID RLY WELL!!! CUTE!! DON MILLS TOO!!! LIL KID SLAYING IT

49.  JINWOO LOOKS SO GOOD HERE!!!!

50.  Anyways Jinwoo was like maybe someone who is good with dance as the leader for Open Up team since it has a hard dance and Baekho was like ya what about Daniel AND THEN INSOO IS LIKE WHAT ABT U DONGHO IKAJAKI TRAINEES LOVE BAEKHO WILL MNET FINALLY STOP LYING

51.  Baekho still pushes it back to Daniel and Danik is like I’d totally love to be the leader JINWOO NODDING ALONG MMO PRIDE

52.  Apparently Daniel is having problems paying attention to all 12 people and Kenta is a bit salty over it and tbh I understand his reasoning

53.  But Daniel noticed it too and heh fucking apologized don’t drag him for this he’s younggg and doesn’t know that much about leading

54.  It’s Showtime team now and everyone want Woodam to be the venter but HWISEUNG IS THERE TOO!!! PAY ATTENTION TO MY BABE HES AMAZING AT HIGH NOTES GIVE HIM SCREENTIME!!!!!

55.  Hwiseung was 56 but raised to 36 LET MY BOY!!! LIVE!!! PLEASE!!!

56.  Taehyun recommends the cringefest that is facial expression battle

57.  Wtf the two ones who didn’t even sing got to be the centers what’s going ooooooonnn

58.  EVERYONE ARE SHOOK BY HWISEUNG AND WOODAMS ADLIBS AND FOR A GOOD REASON AAAAA THEY ARE SO GOODDDD

59.  He’s so cheerful and keeps cracking jokes LET MY BOY!!! DEBUT

60.  Never team is choosing the center I hope Sungwoon gets it tbh let my boy rise some ranks

61.  The centers are Guanlin and Minhyun rip I mean I love both of the kids but LET SUNGWOON SHINEE!! FOR ONCE

62.  SUNGWOON VOLUNTEERED FOR SOLO DANCE CHECKUP PLEASE DO WELL BABE I BELIEVE IN YOU HE DOES REALLY WELL IM SO GLAD BABE I LOVE U IM PROUD OF U I LOVE U LOTS PLEASE DO WELL

63.  HE DID WELL AND GOT PRAISED A SHITTON I AM SO PROUD BABE KILL IT KILLL IT WELL I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!! DEBUT!!! PLEASE!!!!!!

64.  I Know You Know has a shiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttton of low ranking trainees and I feel so so sorry for all of them ugh

65.  WHY IS HWANOONG SO LOW RANKS CMON PEOPLE!!! HE WAS CENTER!! HE IS FUNNY!! HE IS CUTE!!! WHY YALL HATING

66.  The centers are Donghan and Hwanoong and all of them got praised a lot by Kahi and even Hyunbin got the footwork down fml I’m so proud of my kids

67.  This elimination gonna hurt no matter what I got too many faves they show the lower ranked kids like Woo Jinyoung and Hwanoong and Dongbin and Justin and whatnot I AM SO SO EMO!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! LET MY KIDS LIVE

68.  Most of those kids already feel that they’re gonna drop and it’s so fucking depressing I love so many of those kids I feel so bad rn oh my fucking god II want to save them all I want them to be happy and popular and debut well

69.  23 of my own children are gonna be beat away from this show I am so angry anyways thte last time there was abt 2.5mil votes this time its GODDAMN 5.5 MILLION WHAT ON EARTH

70.  HYUNBINN SURVIVED THANKK GOD!!!! THANK FUCK!!!!!! I am not allowed to cry about each trainee I CANT

71.  YEHYUN MADE IT MY MUSICAL GENIUS!!!!! FUCK!! HIS STATS ARE LIKE A ROLLERCOASTER

72.  Moonbok deadass fell from 2nd to 32nd what the fuck this show is so unpredictable and I hate it

73.  KENTA BABY MADE EIT WITH 0 SCREENTIME I LOVE MY BOY SO MUCH

74.  Gunhee also made it what the fuck why is he such a low rank with the goddamn 110k benefit and you can see the light leave Hwanoongs eyes because if Gunhee is so low what happens to him

75.  Its HF and Woodam went up he fell like 10 places fuck he said ‘You’ll have to go up’ to Jinyoung IM SO SADD!! FUCK!!!!!

76.  SUNGWOON MADE IT!!! HE LOOKS LIKE A LIL CLOUD W HIS BLEACHED HAIR!! PROUD OF U BABE

77.  SUNGHYUK MADE IT AGAIN!!! ROSE SO FUCKING MUCH!!!! HE WAS 95 BUT NOW HE IS 24 WHAT ON E A R T H HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK

78.  TAEHYUN IS THERE!!!! HOTTSHOT BOYSSSSSSSSS IM PROUD HE HIGHFIVED SOMEONE IN THE LINE

79.  Oh my god 20th place trainee already has over 1mil votes this is fucking wild whos it gonna be ITS REN!!!!!! WHYS HE SO LOW!! HE FELL TWO PLACES WHAT THE FUCK

80.  Everyone are apologizing this is so sad also JIHOON ACTUAL ANGEL SAID HE MIGHT BE PERSUADED TO GIVE HIS CENTER POSITION TO REN WHAT ON EARTH

81.  Hwiseung is so bright and cute…. How does he do that….

82.  Jinwoo looks dead inside like he has already accepted his place…… but also proud and smiley at Jisung and Daniel… I’m so sad yall what the fuck

83.  WOOJIN DIDN’T HIGHFIVE YOUNGMIN AND WOOJIN RAN BACK FROM THE STAGE TO HUG HIM BRAND NEW PRIDE

84.  I hate Hwiseung why is he so good…. And loveable… in those dark times… fucking god I’m so sad

85.  BoA said cue and Seonho just stood up without the name and BoA was like wdym and Seonho is like it cant be Guanlin bc he’s a superstar

86.  KJALFSA HYUNGSEOB IS THANKING WOOJIN IN HIS SPEECH IM SO EMO THIS IS SO CUTEEEEEE

87.  SEWOON EXPOSED MNET BAEKHO AINT SCARY GET FUKT BOIIII ITS TOP 11 TIME NOW

88.  Oh my GOD it’s a god fucking damn cutscene are you SERIOUS!! Blocked anyways they have a punchinc machine it will be somekinda strength off and they deadass chopped the 1st place seat off and put it there

89.  HWISEUNG AND BYUNMIN ARE THE MC’S why are they doing this to me

90.  Ren is so dumb I love him how does he do THAT with his shoulders

91.  Seongwoo is there and he sure is making himself look cool he does into the trainees to go faaaaaaaaaaar so he can get the motion in and puts sooo much into the show BUT FUCKING STAYS UNDER 900 I LOVE MY DUMB SON HE IS SO STUPID AAAAAAHAHHA FUCK I LOVE HIM HES SO FUNNY EVERYONE ARE LAUGHING LIKE HYENAS

92.  Donghyun was embarrassing w his stretching but fuckin WRECKED that machine taking the throne from Sunghyuk who took it from Dongbin

93.  ITS BAEKHO TIME GODDAMN HWISEUNG SAID IT’S BOSS FIGHT LMAO I LOVE THEM

94.  His punching sound was so loud holy fuck AND HE GOT THE IDENTICAL SCORE!!! WHAT!! LMAO

95.  Rematch, Donghyun hit 949, Baekho 950 lmaooooooo MY SUNSHINE TIGER  

96.  We are back in the elimination its rank 11 ITS BAEKHO!! MY BABE!! MY FIRST BIAS!! POWER VOCAL DUMBO!!! LOVE U!!!!!!!! BoA asked him to do aegyo I’m so done lmaoooooooo

97.  Seeing low ranked trainees be quietly emo and cry is seriously the worst fucking feeling I’m so angry and sad

98.  JAEHWAN IN TOP 10 INDIVIDUAL TRAINEE PRIDE!!! I LOVE U BABE UR AMAZING BY VOCALS AND PERSONALITTY AND LOOKS I HOPE U DO WELL!!!!!

99.  Danik fell by 6 spots I’m emo and he even apologizes at everyone HE IS SO CUTE!!! FUCK!!! STAY UP THERE BABE

100.   Ong has a lot of male fans and Guanlin was like ‘I’m a fan too’ why shouldn’t you be tbh that dude is perfect in each way like hes pretty and can sing can dance ran rap and has a sense of humor the hell else do u want then

101.   Minhyun got 5th and his face on the big screen everyone are like fuck hes hot anyways HE SAID HE WANTS TO DEBUT W JAEHWAN I love how close Jaehwan is with 2hyun aaaaaaahhhh

102.   YOUNGMIN IN A PUPPY HUG PILE I LOVE U RED ALPACA BABE

103.   HE IS GONNA DO SOME BITCHASS ALPACA DANCE SINCE HE GOT 5TH AAAAHAHA SO CUTEEEEEEEEE

104.   The top 4 is Jihoon, Guanlin, Jonghyun and Daehwi

105.   Daehwi is 4 and thanked his mom in America poor kid HES CRYING!!!!!! HE HUGGED YOUNGMIN SO TIGHT!!! THIS IS SO FUCKING SAD!! FUCK POOR BABBIE

106.   JIHOON IS THIRD!! EVERYONE WERE SO READY THAT ITS GONNA B GUANLIN INCLLUDING HIMSELF

107.   OK OVERALL HOW THE FUCK DID GUANLIN GET SECOND!! GODDAMN AINT I SHOOK!!! GOOD JOB LIL CHICKEN

108.   JONGHYUN!!!!! BABY!!!! GENTLE SUNSHINE AND BEST LEADER!!! BEAUTIFUL SMILING CHILD!!! A BAB WEEB!!! IM SO PROUD!!!!!!! IL OVE HIM SO MUCH IM EMO!!!!!! HE CRIED ABOUT NBOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH THOSE YEARS BACK!! AND NOW HERE HE IS!!! NATIONS LEADER, LOVED AFTER FINALLY HAVING SOME EXPOSURE!!!!! FUCK YOU PLEDIS FUCK EVERYONE WHO HAVE SAID SHIT ABOUT HIM I LOVE HIM AND HE IS BEAUTIFUL AND GOOD FUCK YALL

109.   I’m dead Guanlin thanked Baekho and then asked BoA to buy them more food b a b e

110.   ITS TIME FOR THE 35TH!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!! THE CANDIDATES ARE SUNGWOO, DONGSU, DONGHAN AND EUNKI AND ALL OTHER OF MY FAVES ARE DEAD AS FUCK IM SO SAD RN

111.   DONGHAN MADE IT!!!!!!! BLONDIE BABY!!!!! HES CRYING SO HARD!!!!! I FEEL SO EMO ABOUT ALL OF MY FAVE BUT HE MADE IT!!!!! TAEHYUN LOOKED SO LUCKED OUT WHEN HE WAS ANNOUNCED!!!!!! BABY DOLL IM SO PROUD OF YOU YOU DESERVE IT!!!!!

112.   Hwiseung dropped 3 ranks this is why god doesn’t exist

 Overall THANKS MNET FOR ONLY GIVING HWISEUNG AND HWANOONG SCREENTIME WHEN THEY GET ELIMINATED LOVE YA

#produce 101 season 2 #shitposting by yours truly #pd101 #pd101 s2 #p101 s2 #mnet #produce 101 s2 #nu'est #nuest #jr #kim jonghyun #nuest jr #nuest jonghyun #baekho #hwang minhyun #kang dongho #choi minki #choi mingi #p101 #ygk+ #kwon hyunbin #kim jaehwan #kim sangbin #lee insoo #lai guanlin #yoo seonho #fantagio #ong sungwoo #ong seongwoo #ong seongwu

[swearronchanel]

My thoughts during 6.04🙃

You know me by now, I have a lot running through my head when I watch Call The Midwife but don’t we all?? Just saying now it’s long lol

“Our deepest desires are never simple” already deep af Vanessa

MY BBY TRIXIE is SERVING LOOKS😍 LOVE HER OUTFIT

SHE’S ON THE KEEP FIT SIGN AH

What’s up with Sister J dramatically putting on her veil?

Patrick’s going to give Shelagh roses aw omg

Why is he acting so weird with Tim?

Keep fit lit, shit I need to get fit again 😂 I’m going to Miami in less than a month & I’m fat damn Lmaoo whoops

SHELAGH💕😭 my bby. We are regressing in wardrobe though, what happen to the cuter nighties

“I prefer pink anyway” aww

Don’t fuck with Sister Douglas. She’s not taking any shit

Trixie smacking Barbara hips emphasizing “sensible briefs” 😂😂

Shelagh in the wheelchair, I can’t 😭😪 don’t cry bby

PHYLLIS, A GEM

Trixie if you’re unfit then what am I?

“I’m hanging on too”  😭💔

I need Trixie’s black pyjamas, also I need to look like Helen George like how do I become that perfect ?

But being more realistic, I want Trixie’s wardrobe

Poor Marnie

But um that kid is too big to be in a pram?? I see so many too old kids in coches all the time in Manhattan & it bothers me lol

Aw Shelagh laying down, she’s so pretty omg

fuck she’s bleeding again no

BRB CRYING AS SHE CRIES

Tom is so handsome but I don’t like the gelled up hair

Also glad Trixie asked him to visit Marnie

“Elderly primigravida, aged 36” there’s everyone’s answer 😭 so what is Shelagh & Patricks exact age difference?

My poor bby 💔💔 you don’t deserve this

This doctor is kinda an asshole wtf?! I will fight him. He can catch these firey hands for his shitty bedside manner with bby

Yes Shelagh you tell him!

“They’ve gone to hell in a handcart” me handling this semester to be honest

{Phyllis on being akela} “I find small boys exasperating” SAME, THEY ARE GREMLINS AH, I don’t like little boys older than like 7 years old😂

Did I mention I love Phyllis yet? Cause I do

@ dot, I don’t see you helping her keep her flat but you want her child?

I👏🏼don't👏🏼like👏🏼this👏🏼Doctor👏🏼

FUCK YES DELIA, TELL HIM, “though she be but little she is fierce”

I’m pretty sure that’s what Anna had in Downton Abbey?? why do they make it seem like it’s a new producer?

PHYLLIS TESTING WHISTLES, YES.JUST YES. I APPULD EVERY THING SHE DOES

So Trixie picked out magazines & Phyllis sent candy but UGGHH I’m still upset we didn’t have any scenes of anyone at Nonnatus finding out she was pregnant or hospitalized ??

“We may have to stop hoping and we were without hope for any kind of years” KNIFE IN MY HEART & TEARS IN MY EYES

I cry 90% of the time Laura Main is on screen

SHE’S SPECTACULAR BUT PLS @ WRITERS GIVE HER HAPPIER SCENES TO PLAY & PROTECT MY BBY AT ALL COSTS. I’m serious. ** Also again I’ll say it till I die Laura Main (& this show in general) does not get the recognition she deserves

I’m looking at you Golden Globes/SAG/ etc. Downton was nominated for everything, but it’s time to move on.

Don’t come at @ me though I love downton

Gloria is also breaking my heart too, she’s staying so positive though 😭💔

No one gives a shit about your doorbell dot (also is her hair a wig cause I kinda hate it)

“He said he wanted his own flesh and blood or nothing”  that makes me so sad & upset

Sister Julienne genuinely excited about a new midwife is adorable & she is an angel

Yes Trixie! SISTER MC IS NOT A PARCEL!? But a tracking number would be convenient at the moment. WHERE IS SHE ?!  

So is Tom going to tell Marnie he was adopted?

Why is everyone acting like Shelagh didn’t adopt Angela that a young mother that couldn’t keep her?

Glad I knew Trixie and Barbara already knew that Tom was adopted because I would’ve wondered why they didn’t say anything

Violet is so cute haha

Ew the gremlins are here

PHYLLIS HAS THEM TRAINED LIKE PUPPIES I LOVE IT

Can Angela speak? Serious question

YES TIM, IT’S ABOUT TIME YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY. Like seriously there’s no way a 15yr old is always so agreeable with their parents

“Go to the pub” I’m dead

Tim snuck out to the hospital omg my heart

Aw Delia letting him in 😭thank u deels! but why did no one visit Shelagh wtf? not even sister Julienne??

Forceps oh no. OMG THIS LOOKS SO PAINFUL

and after watching this show for song long it doesn’t phase me? but I still don’t like to think about giving birth one day lmaoo

“He’s a man” lol but it was also about time Shelagh & Tim had a cute scene😭😭

PATRICK BOUGHT BEER FOR THEM AW

also makes me kinda nauseas to think about alcohol right now because I drank a little too much last night whoops

WOW PATRICK AND TIM, THIS WAS CUTE FATHER & SON TIME

Now is baby Turner going to be a boy of girl?? They have one of each & it could go either way

NO POOR GLORIA💔I can’t take it

ugh and Shelagh’s face again I cry

Sister Winifred actually getting some attention

holy shit this is all so sad I can’t

Tom is short for Thomas? Seems obvious but I never thought about it

En el nombre del Padre y del Hijo y del Espiritu Santo, Amen💔 & sister Winifred doing the cross😭 it always reminds me of my abuela because she always does that if you say something hypothetically tragic. Actually she just does it a lot.

“You can cry if you want to. There will be better days than this” I’m crying & I really like Sister Douglas

“So no Americans?” “and No men” 😂 PHYLLIS I LOVE YOU BUT GIVE US A CHANCE?

I’m sad that Phyllis would probably not like me

A lot of us suck but not me damn it.😭 I wish they’d write a story for an American even if it’s for like 2 mins as an extra, I’D PLAY IT FOR FREE. Yo could you imagine? I’d be shook

SISTER MJ’S REACTIONS TO ALL THE APPLICANTS KNOCKING ON THE DOOR ARE KILLING ME I LOVE HER. I NEED THAT IN GIF FORM

I also need to screenshot sister j with her hand to her head because that’s me 24/7

“Nursing treats young working class girls the way the world treats women. They’re all over them when there’s a war on. Afterwards, nobody wants to know.” PHYLLIS FucKING CRANE I LOVE YOU.

this Shelagh and Gloria scene is making me cry once again 😪😪

Why didn’t Tom tell Marnie he was adopted? I thought that was happening, maybe not

SISTER J IN A PUB AH

“Is this what is known as a lady’s glass?” THIS IS GREAT IM HERE FOR SISTER J IN THE PUB, SHE KNOWS WHAT’S UP TOO

Still conflicted on Valarie/Valerie (Idk?¿) because I liked her in episode 2 but um she seemed lowkey racist in the clip from the casebook so?

WAIT MARNIE’S KEEPING THE BABY?

ALSO DID THEY PAY HER RENT?

“I’ve got this idea in my head that next year, or that the year after, it’ll be a lovely bunny day and I’ll be down chrisp street market, pushing a pram and somewhere near the flower stall, I’ll look up and I’ll see you pushing a pram and we’ll smile, and we’ll pass the time of day” “that would be lovely wouldn’t it?” I AM NOT OKAY😭😭

GLORIA’S DREAM BETTER COME TRUE

I really didn’t think Marnie was keeping the baby though

Now I feel sad for Dot because she has to give him back

“I wanted a particular doctor and he has a very busy schedule” OMG IT’S PATRICK. I LOVE SISTER DOUGLAS

HE HEARS THE HEARTBEAT. NOW SHE DOES, HER FACE AHHH

I AM DROWNING IN MY OWN TEARS OVER HERE. SAVE ME. WHY AM I SO EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED?

Didn’t that one magazine say Tom was going to comfort Shelagh though? We were played Lmaoo

Sister J basically said she had the job already so what’s the big deal about the letter?

Aw the park, Let’s get it 1962👏🏼👏🏼

SHELAGH WAS DISCHARGED, I AM SO HAPPY. LOOK AT MY BBY SMILING 😭💕 PLS NO MORE SADNESS FOR THE TURNERS THIS SERIES

THIS CHARIOT RACE IS ALSO THE GREATEST THING

MY BBY TRIXIE IN HER LEOTARD OUTSIDE 💖

SISTER JULIENNE PUSHING DELIA & SISTER WINIFRED PUSHING SISTER MONICA JOAN. I LOVE IT SO MUCH

I’m so caught up in all this I missed whatever the hell Vanessa Redgrave said but I’m sure it was profound 😭😭

BONUS NEXT WEEK’S PREVIEW:

The real test will be if she gets on with everyone, wait where is she going to sleep? Sister MC’s room?? Delia’s??

Aw that’s Reggie I presume 😭

Vi and Fred getting a storyline though

“Together we’re going to save the borough’s teeth” why does it amuse me?😂

TRIXIE’S LOVE INTEREST IS A DENTIST? He better be worthy of my bby because I’m not dealing with any bullshit, she deserves the world. & No she doesn’t need a boyfriend at all but like I’m still here for it & more Trixie screen time is good to me

SISTER MJ CRYING? WHY??

Oh shit that’s why. Where tf is Sister Mary Cynthia? Northfield? Fuck I’m not going to be ready for next week

Like not at all. 99.9% chance I will be sobbing

#call the midwife #why am I emotionally invested #when did i become this person #lets get it 1962 #protect my bbys at all costs though #im still crying #my commentaries™

[celebritylive]

Brandi Redmond is getting candid about her recent mental health struggles.

On Friday, the Real Housewives of Dallas star, 41, opened up about checking herself into a wellness center earlier this month, sharing an 11-minute video on Instagram that detailed the controversy surrounding a racially insensitive video she made years ago and explained why she sought professional help after it resurface on social media.

The emotional clip began with Redmond speaking about “mistakes” she’s made in the past and the importance of “learning and growing” from it.

“I did this video — it was essentially four years ago — and it was in reference to a scene on season 2 of RHOD where the ladies were talking about my features — in particular, my squinty eyes. Once again, that’s something I have been insecure about so I made a video poking fun at myself,” she said, explaining that the clip was taken out of context. “I immediately took the post down and posted a public apology. Someone maliciously recorded it off a device and saved it for this many years … and it resurfaced. I made a poor decision of being angry and trying to defend in the moment what was wrong and insensitive.”

Redmond added, “Once again, I’m sorry.”

View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by Brandi Redmond (@brandiredmond) on Jan 17, 2020 at 5:07pm PST

RELATED: RHOD‘s Brandi Redmond Pens Emotional Note After Critics Slam 10-Year-Old Daughter’s Attitude

Redmond — who shares three children, daughters Brooklyn, 10, and Brinkley, 7, as well as 2-year-old son Bruin, with her husband Bryan — received backlash from members of the Asian community late last year for a controversial video she filmed of herself and her daughters.

In the clip, which Redmond first recorded back in 2017, the reality star appeared to mock an Asian accent while addressing her squinty eyes. “They ask me what Asian I am because my eyes, they squinty,” Redmond laughed in the clip with her daughters giggling behind her.

The video resurfaced amid the most recent season during which Redmond called out her RHOD costar LeeAnne Locken a racist for derogatory comments Locken had made against their costar Kary Brittingham.

Many critics online pointed to the clip as a symbol of Redmond’s hypocrisy, accusing her of the same labels she placed on Locken.

Initially, Redmond responded in since-deleted tweets in which she was poking fun of herself. “It’s a good impersonation if I do say so myself and there was no harm done,” she said in one message, according to a screenshot shared online, adding that she would “do it again.”

A video resurfaced of me from three years ago which at the time I had posted and quickly deleted and then immediately apologized for my insensitivity . I would like to once again sincerely apologize for my offensive actions.

— Brandi Redmond (@BrandiRedmond) January 4, 2020

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RELATED: RHOD‘s Brandi Redmond Apologizes After Resurfaced Video of Her Appearing to Mock Asians

But eventually, Redmond changed her tune and issued another apology, writing on Twitter: “A video resurfaced of me from three years ago which at the time I had posted and quickly deleted and then immediately apologized for my insensitivity. I would like to once again sincerely apologize for my offensive actions.”

According to Redmond, the backlash she received when the video resurfaced “became a campaign for hate and bullying.”

“It just want you all to understand how I ended up getting help and why I ended getting help,” she said through tears in the video shared on Friday. “I felt so much shame. I felt bullied. I didn’t feel like living anymore.”

The mom of three continued, “I went into this deep, dark depression. I couldn’t eat, sleep. I wasn’t taking care of myself, my family or my responsibilities. Every time I would see something negative, I would start throwing up. I didn’t feel like life was worth living.”

Redmond said she eventually approached her husband Bryan for help.

RELATED: Brandi Redmond Checks Herself Into Wellness Center After Apologizing for Controversial Video

As PEOPLE reported, the Bravo star checked herself into a wellness center early January to “reflect and better herself.” A rep for Weekly Dose of B.S. — the podcast she leads with close friend and fellow RHOD star Stephanie Hollman — made the announcement on Instagram after Redmond had skipped a recording of an episode.

In Friday’s video, Redmond called the experience “life-changing.”

“I do have my smile back. I want you all to know that I love you. I love life,” she said. “I can’t wait to wake up and nurture my family and most importantly myself.”

“I have peace in my heart knowing God is always with me, he knows my intentions in my heart. I want to live honestly with kindness and appreciation for all mankind. Nobody is perfect and I needed to know I accept and love myself and if I make others laugh that is just a bonus.”

Redmond also captioned the video: “I am so grateful for God helping me through this, allowing me to heal and love myself. To those that set out to hurt me, know that I still have compassion for you in my heart. Thank you all for hearing my truth and my heart.”

If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), text “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go to suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

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