#I’m questioning myself all the time..

[twinkodium]

I’ve read this book series in the wrong order 😭😭

#two mafia series from the same author #I’ve read the newer one first a months ago maybe #and now reading the older one and I recognise the character and where their journeys was started 😭 #it’s so weird! #I’m questioning myself all the time.. #‘is that that Declan… the Irish mafia boss from book 2??’ #‘wait Diego… wasnt he the boss before Declan???’ #beautifully cruel by jt geissinger #ngl queens & monsters were more action packed on every level #like I’m almost halfway through and the girl still has no clue that he’s in the mafia 😅 #lola’s ramblings

[hitwiththetmnt]

Wow a proper meet the artist? Here’s a lil intro for everyone with more info on me･:*+.

#it only felt right to post this with all the new followers I’m getting :} #feel free to ask questions - I did pack a lot into this introduction #I had fun making this - it’s kind of a fun combo of my own personality and my sona #god my handwriting can be atrocious at times - bonk me on the head if you can’t read anything #also my spelling - ughh #meet the artist #my art #introducing myself #tmnt #hit #the hits

[wekillitwithfire]

#this is a joke poll #but also i genuine question i asked myself in the shower today #i feel like i got an early start on the whole. horrid terrifying mental state thing #and then i was able to pull myself out of it pretty early too #(based on what other people said. i had gotten out of the worst of it by the time most people like. Start the Bad Years) #(broad generalization) #and then highschool was spent trying to move on from it. but like i didn’t Really move on i was just ignoring it #and pretending it never happened? #and now i’m like. man i didn’t plan this far #and i think i might feel this way for a long time #idk life is full of uncertainties and i think it’s ultimately useless to try and plan it all out #let’s get through this #alright deeply personal post OVER

[sunnnfish]

Maybe I’m okay with it if Hirano never traditionally “loves” Kagi. Or anyone. Maybe it never will turn into the same kind of love Kagi feels. Kagi is nevertheless such a source of inspiration and strength and comfort to Hirano. Even if he never feels a desire to touch or get married or whatever. Maybe he does it because Kagi asks and he loves making Kagi happy most of all. He wouldn’t seek it if not asked. But Kagi is always asking. And he knows it makes Kagi happy. Does anyone see the vision. Do you understand. Maybe kagi will be okay with it if Hirano never “loves” him the same way Kagi loves him. Because he knows how Hirano works and he knows how Hirano cares. And he knows he is unique to Hirano. He knows Hirano wouldn’t do these things with anyone else. And that’s still love in its own way.

#every day I convince myself more and more of aroace-spec Hirano #or maybe the perceived slow-burn is getting to me #it’s like. I kind of keep forgetting that there is still going to be more relationship and character development #but also. At this point in time at least they are so queerplatonic to me #AND it all wraps back around to the theme of different kinds of love #we do not love each other in the same ways. but that’s what makes it special #also a queerplatonic relationship answers all the weird limbo relationship stuff they have goin on in future ssmy chapters #idk. anyways. maybe im crazy #also all comes back to How do you quantify being someone’s most important person #Kagi WILL be the most important person to Kagi. it’s just a question of how that manifests #at this point I can’t imagine it manifesting in Hirano necessarily wanting to touch Kagi or saying things like I love you #it’s simply. laughter and happiness and comfort #they are already old together. do you get it #I never feel like I’m properly able to explain the feelings I have. whatever #surely someone gets it #sunnfish.kghr #Hirano to kagiura #Hirano and kagiura

[send-me-a-puffalope]

why did my teachers think it was okay to give us like one single weekend to finish all of our midterm projects and study for our tests.

#slight vent #i have 3 projects and 3 tests #i’m halfway through my lit/history project and halfway through my psych project #and maybe a quarter done with my programming project #which is fucking insane btw cause how tf am i supposed to code a whole video game in like 3 days on top of everything else 😭😭😭 #and some things he hasn’t taught us and just thinks that we should just be able to figure out like HELLO???/?/// #I DONT HAVE TIME TO TEACH MYSELF NEW CODE #ITS THE MIDTERM/FINAL FOR THE CLASS?????? #and once the weekend starts i’ll have no one to trouble shoot my stuff and fix my bugs so literally i’ll be hopeless so 😭😭😭 #my calc teacher JUST finished teaching us everything we need for the midterm TODAY. THE MIDTERM IS ON WEDNESDAY. BRO. #my physics teacher doesn’t let us copy down any of our idk test questions or take our old assessments home to study #*old #so we get to look em over for like 20 mins and hand em back. which doesn’t exact fucking help me when i’m studying for the midterm. #WITH NO STUDY GUIDE. #my teachers even said that this years midterms are worse than previous years cause they’re all in a row instead of split by a weekend #we’ve had 2 delayed openings and 1 early dismissal this week which means we have less time to work on our midterm projects in class 😭😭😭😭 #i’m so overwhelmed i’m gonna explode #by the time i finish these projects i’m not gonna have anymore energy/time to study for my tests. WHICH IS THE HARD SHIT BTW.

[iridescent-glitter-dragon]

The real question in Knives Out is how long was Blanc ominously sitting in the dark waiting for Marta to come out that particular door (which she might not even have done)

#knives out #benoit blanc #marta cabrera #like it was a very dramatic moment #but he couldn’t have been sure she would be there #and they would’ve finished questioning the family hours ago #what was he doing all that time #I want to imagine he was texting Philip #just because it’s funny #like ‘hello my dear husband #how has your day been #I’m just setting up a dramatic reveal of my presence #do you think I should announce myself or just light a cigar from the shadows #see you when I get home’

[rustyreveries]

decided to torture myself a bit and attempted to doodle canon sal. never doing this again

is this what the people want. boring ass green twink /lh

#i forgot how different my sal is from canon in terms of like. physical appearance #my version is soooo much better 😘 /hj #salad fingers #this sucks soooo fucking bad i’m sorry #i could not bring myself to finish this it is vile #i used up all my energy on my little pony fanart 💔 #i can never draw sal’s head right it’s driving me crazy #i have no idea how to draw skinny people either forgive me #i was fighting myself so hard not to add eyelashes… he’s so incomplete without the 2 fat lashes i give him all the time #why did his fingers change sizes in this you may be asking? i have no fucking clue please stop asking questions . #maybe check out the other art i posted earlier it's sm better than this. i love sal but he makes my art shitty for some reason #he's like a curse #i just noticed smth. why does sal look like he’s jacking off in the one doodle ☹️☹️ #maybe he is idk #why does this look better than my actual sf art :[ #i think it's bc i spent like 10 minutes on the head losies #> rust’s art <

[drella]

hey guys have u guys heard abt the darkness that’s on the edge of town……..

#TN ILL BE ON THAT HILL CAUSE I CANT STOP ILL BE ON THAT HILL W EVERYTHING I GOT LIVES ON THE LINE WHERE DREAMS ARE FOUND AND LOST ILL BE #THERE ON TIME AND ILL PAY THE COST FOR WANTING THINGS THAT CAN ONLG BE FOUND IN THE DARKNESS ON THE EDGE OF TOWN 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ #hai tumblr it’s been so long………. #moved so far away to a new college and it has been so wonderful and beautiful and perfect yayyyyyyyy :D ^_^ #i got an awesome internship and i’ve been making friends and taking sick urban studies class and i’m so happy and proud of myself ehehehe!!! #I AM SO WOERIED IM GONNA FAIL ALL OF MY CLASS ACTUALKY THO LOL #and my adderall has been iffy or my tolerance is fucked or SOMETHING BUT ITS OKAY ITS OKAY THERES A DARKNESS ON THE EDGE OF TOWN #bruce is playing near me in like a month and i wanna go SOOOO BADDDDDD i saw him last february it was MAGICAL #TIL SOMEDAY THEY CUT IT LOOSE CUT IT LOOSE OR LET IT DRAG EM DOWN WHERE NO ONE ASKS ANY QUESTIONS OR LOOKS TOO LONG IN UR FACE IN THE DARKNE #SS ON THE EDGE OF TOWN 🗣️🗣️🗣️ #em.txt #bruce springsteen

[thejadecount]

The Crime Turtles Post (a.k.a. 2012 Karai & the Rise TMNT are siblings)

So I did something

It’s just a little Drabble based off of that one scene in Karai’s introduction episode where she and Leo talk about stealing a katana I just really like to think that Rise Leo (after going through some loop-de-loops of technical thinking) would absolutely steal that sword

#I’m thinking of making it a oneshot series #and the next one would be the rise turtles appearing in the 2012 universe and getting captured by the foot clan #but idk only if people are interested #I just couldn’t get this out of my head #until next time you guys #rottmnt #rise tmnt #tmnt crossover #2012 TMNT #rise leo #rise leonardo #rottmnt leonardo #rottmnt leo #look my guys literally evaded so many crimes and shit in his little trips during the hidden city episodes #what do you mean he wouldn’t steal the katana he totally would #I don’t have to justify myself #2012 Karai and the rise TMNT are siblings no questions asked #‘oh but they actually wouldn’t go along with Karai’s crimes—‘ #fanfiction is a medium to which I can mold into my insane realities I am god you are not shut up #AYO ALL THOSE KARAI X LEO SHIPPERS BETTER STEP THE FUCK AWAY #GO AWAY #GO #LEAVE #2012 karai

[skyleathero]

🕊✨❤️

#dbz #akira toriyama #goku #rest in peace #my artwork #edit: ok this is starting to hit me now. it’s just so hard to believe he’s actually dead #the fact that he died so recently made me so confused #and during 6am I started questioning myself and death and that’s when I started crying as soon as my thought when to toriyama #god I feel so guilty for not feeling anything before. it just happened so sudden that I just didn’t know how to feel about all of this #he genuinely is the reason why I’m happier than I am and that I got a lot better in art. he really inspired me to keep going with my art #career. it’s just sad that he’s now gone. the fact that March 1 was his last breath also made me realize that death can happen at any time #at any moment to anyone. i hope he’s made it to heaven 🕊

[tvrningout]

small heads up that i might be scarce for the next few days! i’m really tired and stressed bc of finals and work, and it’s affecting my mood which in turn affects how i feel here. i’m much too sensitive these last few days, so i’m not gonna make being here a priority for a little while.

sorry about this and thank you for your patience 💜 and pls!! take care of yourselves!! this time of year is hard on a lot of people, so remember that it’s okay if you need to step back and rest 💜

#i wanna joke and mess around and cry over characters #but i know i’m just setting myself up to get hurt and fail with how tired i’ve been #there’s been a shift in my mindset where i question my place here or i concentrate on negatives #and we all know when that starts it’s time to take a break especially bc i /know/ it’s the fatigue talking #i’ll maybe try to chat on discord? not tonight though bc i feel choked up #i’m gonna marathon a silly show to distract myself and go to bed at a normal hour bc i hate getting like this 😭 #get ready to ramble | ooc #tw vent #tw negative #since i did elaborate a bit — sorry y’all ;;;;

[whentherewerebicycles]

in my dream job era

#I could not love it more #it’s just the perfect blend #of types of work #today I was in back to back meetings but all of them were useful and engaging and energizing #tomorrow more meetings #where I get to do a lot of asking questions and thinking with people to identify issues and articulate priorities #and solve problems #and then like most of the rest of the week will just be like #doing sustained thinking & strategizing & research #to figure out how to flesh out and implement the ideas we generated #it’s just perfect!!!!!!!! #the thing I have learned about myself professionally is like #I just love and thrive on and NEED a ton of people contact #especially the kind where you’re working on a project together #but I also really need quiet no interruptions thinking time where I can shut off email/teams/whatever #and just like #synthesize… reflect… research… consolidate… experiment… reflect some more #anyway every time I see that meme that’s like ‘I have no dream job I do not dream of labor’ #I’m like CANNOT relate #I was a creature made to work #but like #work that is deeply fulfilling and values aligned and pushes you to constantly be learning #etc etc etc #anyway… THRIVING #what a relief after 10 months of being like maybe I’ll never use my brain again

[catilinas]

why do classics courses in uni make you read like. ‘canonical’ classical texts for one thousand years and not even mention the wild shit in e.g. pausanias this is so fun why did i have to read the res gestae so many times

#/J I KNOW WHY ALSO I KNOW I COULD HAVE JUST READ PAUSANIAS MYSELF BACK THEN! but i didn’t! because of lucan #howeverrrrrrr every time i’ve just read a bit of like. pliny or pausanias or ATHENAEUS? the deipnosophistae is fun you guys i promise #it has been fun! would have loved to do a module on this stuff! absolutely do not have the time to sit down and read all of any of them #though!!! #also rip i read the entire res gestae ever night for like a month before my augustan history exam #because the lecturer said it was a fun way to revise it. as a Joke but i did do it. #it did not help! i had weird res gestae dreams and barely remember any of it and then did the essay question on the aeneid. #anyway. pausanias fun. i’m enjoying it #beeps

[dancing-with-stars]

i am losing my mind

#god is testing me this is just a test this is just a cruel joke #vanus thoughts #i’m going to go insane #i seriously dont know what to do i’m so tired of all this #too much is happening at once and at the same time i feel like nothing is happening and i will stay in this place forever #i just want to live in a cottage far far away on a shore that has never been visited and is not on any map so no one from this life can find #me and i will never interact with another human being and i will be lonely but at least i will be free because what the fuck is this #i swear to god when i leave this place i will never come back they might haunt me but they wont hurt me any more than they have #i need a new fucking life new hair new clothes new body new people new love #i will go to a new place #where no one doubts my memory and makes me question myself and makes me stay quiet and no one will force me to act like an adult when i’m 16 #and i will rest and heal and work #but i don’t want to be here anymore #why did i pour my heart out into these tags no one will read them #this makes me a little sad

[peachyykira]

.

#I don’t know how intentional it is #but the way he’s encouraging me and pushing me to take better care of myself in what feels like subtle ways just has mt heart all warm #this man helped me figure out budget friendly options for my groceries and is giving me different ways to put them together #I’m eating real food. meals. at home. for the first time in like at least a year? #he answers all my dumb baby cooking questions #he encourages me when i feel like idk what I’m doing (like today when I was making a breakfast bowl and nothing was done at the same time) #like idk how to explain it totally #but basically I feel CARED for. looked after. loved? #even though he’s 4 hours away #and like this is just one aspect! there’s so much more he’s doing all the time that makes me feel safer and happy #idk man. I just have a full tummy (of REAL FOOD) and am feeling feelings. #idk if or when he will see this but I just needed to get it out. I hope he knows how much I appreciate him 💜 #🤓 daddy #talking peach

[gregmarriage]

why do i always have a health episode at the most importune times??

#idk if it’s a proper health ep but i haven’t slept it off yet and i usually consider that a episode #like if i had a bad day yeah sure happens all the time #but if i feel ill for longer than 24 hours that usually means something #the importune time in question rn being that my dad and brother are in london and my #mum can’t drive so if it’s a full on health episode and i end up in hospital again im so screwed #but it’s probably fine (famous last words) #idk maybe i’m catastrophising it who knows #i just know i feel gross rn #like i’m mostly okay then i crash #idk i’m just trying to get sleep and look after myself but this shit is exhausting #gwen rambles #gwenposting