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trulivin · 4 years

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Hands Off, Please

A/N: Hey everyone! This is my first fic that I wanted to share with you just so you could get a sense of my writing style and whatnot. Please let me know what you think and requests are open

Kaz Brekker X Reader, Six Of Crows

Warnings: Mentions of Abuse in the past but nothing too graphic!

*I also made this aesthetic so if you would like to use it please just tag me or give me credit for it! And yes I know my gif is janky, but it’s fine!*

Y/N sat at a table on the main floor of the Slat with Rotty and Specht, waiting for Kaz to get out of his meeting with whoever he had a deal with this time. As a long-time member of the Dregs and someone who was practically brought up by the notorious Dirtyhands, Y/N was held in high respect, partially out of fear, among her fellow Crows. Most of the time at least. Of course everyone teased her and called her ‘the bastard’s queen’ or ‘Brekker’s shadow’ because he had always left her in charge whenever he was busy, or she somehow was allowed to beat up anyone who was out of hand. People just listened to her since Kaz gave her so much power. Her reputation as the assassin of the Barrel helped as well.

It was surprising to people like Inej, Jesper, Wylan, and Nina to see Kaz get extremely close to someone, but he had let his guard down with Y/N. He could let his guard down with her. Though he would never admit it, Inej could easily notice the slight change in his demeanor when Y/N was around. Even Y/N showed a subtle difference in her eye when she was around Kaz. It was like they were the same person, always watching their own backs behind a mask, but when they were together all the disguises were disregarded. Jesper was also quite convinced the two were in a secret relationship because of how Kaz somehow always picked Y/N out in a room. On a job, Jesper noticed how he would somehow keep an eye on the dark-haired girl and make sure she was out of harm's way, especially during the raid of the Ice Court and the events following that nearly killed them all. But, sadly the two never showed any signs of physical or emotional connection. They were always together but out of each other’s reach in the slightest. However, there had always been an unsaid establishment that Y/N was Kaz’s and no one could have her.

Of course, that wasn’t known to all of the members of the Dregs. Mainly the younger boys and the newest members.

Rotty and Specht saw a couple of the new boys head over to their table and moved over a bit letting the newbies come and join them. Y/N smiled kindly and also scooted over allowing more room at the little table. “Well we did it!” a boy named Flynn said on Y/N’s right. “Oh did you now,” Specht smirked at Rotty and Y/N. Flynn and Riker were sent to shake up some filthy wannabe boss for the money he owed Kaz for getting him out of trouble.

“So you got the money then?” Y/N asked, bored already with this lot. The newbies smirked and plopped a leather bag on the table in front of her. She leaned back, slightly impressed these idiots actually did it. Of course she trailed after them, making sure they could actually get the job done. The guy may not have had a lot of people backing him, but he had two other guys that could easily take out two, arrogant teenagers.

“We sure did, sweetheart,” Riker smirked at her. Y/N raised an eyebrow at the boy. Rotty and Specht dropped their grins and their eyes went cold. “Watch your mouth,” Rotty snarled. Y/N was actually somewhat excited to see how this would unfold. No, she did not appreciate the little rat calling her that, but if a fight was about to break out she wouldn’t be opposed to that. “I didn’t do anything,” Riker said putting his hands up as if he were surrendering but Y/N could see a glint in his eye. She rolled her eyes. Boys she thought.

Y/N was undeniably a sight for sore eyes in the Barrel so she was bound to draw attention from people, but no one in the Dregs dared to make a move out of fear of what Kaz Brekker would do to them.

“So we got the money. What do we get in return?” Flynn asked. Y/N, Specht, and Rotty sent him a nasty look. “A place to crash and more jobs,” Specht snapped. “Surely we get something better,” Flynn pressed, winking at Y/N. Who the hell was this kid? It was cute at first, but the jokes were already getting old. Riker seemed content with sitting in silence and not pressing on with the jokes and almost looked as shocked as Specht, Rotty, and Y/N at his friend’s response. She glanced up at Per Haskell’s old office hoping Kaz would be finished soon, but the door remained closed. “Why don’t you keep your dicks in your pants boys,” Y/N snapped. If Rotty and Specht were dogs, the hairs on the back of their necks would be bristling. The two had been good friends of Y/N since they met, and if it weren’t for Kaz, they’d probably be the most protective of her.

“Oh come on, you’re the hottest one here,” Flynn said, “Surely you’ve shacked up with the other boys before, yeah?”. Y/N pursed her lips, “I think you hurt Anika’s feelings.” She ignored his other comment. Then Flynn did something no one was expecting: he rested a hand dangerously high on Y/N’s leg. Her cold eyes snapped to his smirking face. That did it. Rotty shoved Flynn off of her and swung. There was a definite crunch.

Riker being an idiot lunged at Rotty landing a solid hit before Specht launched himself into the fight. Everyone’s attention turned on the fight and a few of the younger members joined in trying to back up Riker and Flynn. Y/N somehow got shoved over as more people started taking sides. What the hell was happening in here? She huffed to herself before trying to tear Flynn off of Rotty. He turned and swung not realizing who was. Y/N took a hit to her eye and felt a little blood run down the side of her face.

His face drained and said, “Oh. Darling I am so sorry.” Darling? All the voices of the horrible men rang out in her head for a moment. Y/N glared at him before pulling her arm back and breaking his nose. She then kneed him in the crotch and managed to wrestle him to the ground. Everyone was practically fighting on top of each other. Y/N’s anger flared as she shoved him harder into the wooden floor and scraped his face to make sure some splinters would come up. “You ever lay your hands on me again and I will break both of your arms,” Y/N hissed in his ear digging her need further into his neck. “You crazy bitch!” He screamed in pain.

“You have no idea--” Y/N started, but a loud shot went off and everyone fell silent. “What the hell is going on here?” Kaz growled on the balcony holding a pistol in one hand and his cane in the other. I close my door for one second and this whole damn place falls apart. His eyes were darker than night, and when his eyes landed on Y/N’s partially swollen face his eyes somehow went darker. He was beyond furious. “Well?” He snapped as everyone stayed frozen where they were still holding on to their opponents. Unfortunately, Flynn had been the one to decide to open his mouth, “This psycho,” he gestured under Y/N to Rotty, “Attacked me!” “Yeah well why don’t you keep your hands to yourself then you filthy little perv,” Rotty bit back.

“All I did was flirt a bit with her! Like everyone else does!” Y/N dug Flynn’s face harder into the floor and jabbed him with her knee again. “There’s a difference between having a conversation with someone, flirting, and then trying to feel them up,” She hissed at the boy. She could feel Kaz’s hard stare on her as she seemed to be in the center of a circle now.

Y/N twisted his arm tighter and dug her nails into his skin. Flynn cried out in pain and his eyes went to Kaz. He stood there with narrowed eyes. After a bad childhood, Y/N had always been wary of a man’s touch. Much like Inej, she was picked up and taken to the Menagerie for a majority of her childhood on top of being raised by an abusive father with brothers who seemed to follow in their father’s footsteps. Kaz of course was the only one who knew about this, but Specht and Rotty had a faint idea of what happened after they found her in a closet puking her guts out, pale as a ghost after a job went awry with a nasty man who had a taste for young pretty girls.

“Well? Aren’t you going to help me?” Flynn begged Kaz. Kaz looked at the picture in front of him. Y/N was dangerous right now. He knew the boy laid a hand on her as soon as he came out of the office to see her practically smothering him. She always had that look in her eye that told Kaz when someone stepped out of line. He was screaming inside to just go and strangle the kid for laying a single finger on his girl, but he didn’t need to lose anymore newbies. They were useful for mediocre jobs that Kaz didn’t need to do himself.

Kaz pushed off of the railing and began making his way down to the main floor. “Y/N,” he said calmly, “Up you go.” She glared at Kaz but said nothing, releasing her grip on Flynn. The boy stood up and rolled his shoulders as everyone began picking things back up. Kaz didn’t even have to say anything and they all started cleaning up the mess they made. Rotty and Specht flanked Y/N’s sides as soon as she stood up. Flynn and Riker were still in between them and an approaching Kaz.

“Thank you,” Flynn scowled at Y/N. “What the hell is wrong with you?” He went on, “You’re crazy, bitch. Now I get why you didn’t acknowledge my other comment earlier,” Flynn spat, “No one would ever want to sleep with you, I mean they’d have to--” Kaz’s cane collided with the back of Flynn’s leg causing him to collapse. “Finish that sentence and I’ll let Y/N break more than just your arms,” Kaz growled quietly. He never shouted which made him more dangerous.

But Flynn ignored the pain and smirked again at Y/N. That did it. Y/N grabbed the two daggers in her belt and flipped them up before lunging at the boy. She didn’t care if she was going to kill him. Kaz wouldn’t kick her out of the gang and if he did then screw him too. Y/N knew boys like this. They’d only grow up to be monsters.

Rotty and Specht tried getting in her way because even if they didn’t like this kid, they weren’t going to let Y/N kill anyone in the gang. She easily slipped out of their arms hitting them hard in the face causing them to double over in pain. Just as she was about to slit the kid’s throat, strong arms grabbed her. She felt cool leather hands on her bare arms and a body blocking hers from the cowering boy on the floor. Just how it should be, she thought maliciously. “Let me go!” Y/N snapped, struggling to get to Flynn.

“No,” Kaz said calmly. “Get him out of here,” Kaz ordered Specht and Rotty. Y/N struggled harder against Kaz.

“You can’t just let him go! I will hunt you down and kill you!”

“No you won’t,” Kaz said coolly in her ear, but she ignored his comment.

“I will kill you if I ever see your face here again!” Y/N screamed after the boy that was being dragged out. “C’mon,” he muttered half dragging Y/N up to his room. He was considerably out of breath by the time they reached the top.

Kaz threw her in the room and stood in between her and the door. He knew she was heavily triggered by her past so he let her scream, shout, chew him out. Whatever she needed. “You’re letting him walk? You? Of all people?” She yelled, “You shouldn’t have done that! I know boys like that! They all turn out the same. Disgusting rats who find it fun to take advantage of young, helpless girls!” She hissed. Kaz watched silently observing all of her features. Even as angry as she was with him and beaten up, Kaz seemed to find Y/N even more beautiful. Practically glowing he thought to himself.

“Are you done?” he asked. Y/N stopped pacing and glared daggers at him. Yet, she let out a breath and nodded. The tunnel of red she saw was slowly fading and she came to her senses. It was simply just her and Kaz in the peace and quiet of his room. He looked at her before his gaze softened a bit. He wanted so badly to brush his bare hands across her face, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to. She was intoxicating to him, and he had been slowly working on skin to skin contact with her whenever it was just them. She knew about his brother and she knew how it felt to drown.

It was so easy for her to slip back into her rage and terror over a simple gesture of affection, and Kaz didn’t want to be the one that caused her to act like this. “What happened?” He asked calmly, peeling his gloves off. Y/N caught the movement and stared at his slender hands refusing to let her fascination with them get in the way of her still bubbling rage.

“That little boy thought it would be fun to get a reward for shaking up that guy who owed you money,” Y/N scowled. “And that reward being you?” Kaz quirked a brow. “Yeah,” she spit. “How are you so calm over this?” she growled a moment later. Usually he was more worked up about this and deep down it stung that he didn’t seem to care about her well-being right now. Of course she had no right to care about what he thinks of her. He’s not your boyfriend she scolded herself waiting for his response.

Kaz eyed her for a moment and sighed, “You can take care of yourself.” That wasn’t the answer she was really expecting, but what was it she wanted him to say? He approached her slowly, never taking his eyes off of hers. Y/N stood still, her heart skipping a beat as he stopped in front of her. She saw him take a breath before allowing his hand to brush up against hers. The pain in his eyes over the smallest touch made Y/N pull away. She didn’t want to put him through this. He didn’t owe her anything. “Wait,” He said when she moved her hand.

Kaz’s warm fingers grazed hers before he ran them up her wrist. Any left over anger had subsided as a chill ran down her spine. His dark eyes studied her face and he noticed how her eye now had a purplish tint starting to form, and then he saw where her perfect skin had split and a little blood ran down the side of her face. Kaz gritted his teeth, allowing his temper to begin to rise. In all honesty, he didn’t really know what to think when he saw Y/N on top of the boy digging his skull into the floor. And even worse, for a fleeting moment Kaz had wished it was he who was under her under different circumstances. But he quickly pushed aside any thoughts that weren’t relevant to the event of her killing one of the Dregs in front of everyone.

After a moment, Kaz slowly moved his hand to her face running his fingers lightly across the cut. He allowed his hand to trail down her face as she watched him trace her features. Eventually, his hand fell back next to hers as he allowed himself to intertwine it with her own small hand. Y/N watched as he took a moment to collect himself. She waited for his outburst, but it never came. It was always like this with them. The seclusion of his room, unspoken words that needed to be said, and the smallest touches that left both of them with a burning sensation.

Kaz was getting better at this. After the whole heist and everything, he was getting better with physical contact, but it was still a struggle for him. Even if it was Y/N. He longed to be able to run his hands through her hair, kiss her skin, and just be able to touch her. But somehow, Jordie seemed to slip in his mind as soon as he’d lay a finger on her.

“No one is allowed to lay a hand on you” Kaz murmured partially to himself. She was his and he preferably didn’t want to share. Those nasty little rats, he scowled.

“What is this?” Y/N blurted out softly. Kaz gave her a confused look as the sound of her voice caught him off guard. She even surprised herself. “I mean,” she started with a shaky breath, “What are we?” she finally asked. Kaz looked at her and saw the frightened girl he picked up off the streets as she had escaped the Menagerie. He thought for a moment. What were they? Kaz wondered the same thing. “I-I don’t know,” he said watching her face slightly fall. “But,” he started again, “It doesn’t mean we can’t be something,” he concluded. It was true, he had always wanted to be with her, but he knew she’d have to be patient with him, and he’d have to be patient with her. Kaz couldn’t tell her he would spoil her and shower her with hugs and kisses and gifts because he physically couldn’t. He didn’t want to do that to her and even if he could get over his fear, he didn’t want to push her either.

“It’s hard for me too you know,” she spoke again pulling him from his thoughts. He knew, but he let her talk anyways. “They beat me,” her voice wavered, “and left me in the freezing rain. They laughed at me--” “Don’t, Y/N just don’t,” Kaz stopped her. She didn’t need to explain herself and why she wanted to kill that boy. “You’re safe with me,” Kaz said more firmly now. And hesitantly he did something he didn’t expect himself to do. He pulled her into him and wrapped his arms around her. Y/N froze not knowing if she should hug him back. Timidly, she wrapped her arms around him and the two stood there in silence. Everything inside Kaz screamed at him and the bile rose in his throat, but he forced it away the best he could. She needed him right now even if he felt like he was drowning.

“Kaz,” Y/N mumbled, pulling him up from the cool water that he was slipping under. She could sense his uncomfort and knew it was time to let go. She unwrapped her arms from around him and slowly untangled herself from his body. Surprisingly, he missed the warmth her body brought, but he was also grateful she stepped back and gave him some space. A small smile played at her lips as he stepped back and put his gloves back on. “C’mon,” he spoke softly offering his now covered hand to her. Y/N took it with ease. It doesn’t mean we can’t be something played over in her mind. She was as happy as she could possibly be even if it would take time. She would wait and she knew it would take time not only for him but for her as well. Y/N was just happy Kaz was officially hers in some way, and she got the feeling he was content with that too. Although, she didn’t know she had always been his in his own mind.

They made their way back down to the landing above the Crows. For the most part, the room had been picked up but everyone was still cleaning the mess up. Specht and Rotty had returned with a very bruised Flynn helping pick up broken tables and chairs. As soon as Kaz and Y/N made it on the landing, everyone could sense their presence. All heads turned to them.

“The tables and chairs all better be replaced by tomorrow morning,” Kaz’s hard stare was back. “I didn’t fix this place up with my own money for a bunch of idiots to go and destroy it all.” Y/N stood closely next to Kaz, her eyes narrowed as she was watching the crowd. “And no one lays a hand on Y/N anymore,” he hissed. “If I ever catch any of you with your filthy hands on her, insulting her, or even looking at her without a single ounce of respect, I will break more than just your face.” That was a bit much, Kaz she thought to herself but smirked a little at how much he was actually riled about this.

“Got it?” he snapped. The crowd nodded and gave a terrified “yes” as he glared down on them with his usual Kaz face. Y/N scanned the gang below and found most of the young ones refusing to look at her and Kaz. Flynn was looking anywhere but her. “Did you get that?” she snarled at the newbies. “Flynn?” she spat. All eyes snapped to hers as her anger seemed to be returning. “Yes,” he mumbled along with the others before diverting his eyes. “Back to work,” Kaz snapped, and just like he pushed an unfreeze button, everyone jumped back to picking up damaged pieces.

Flynn, Riker, and a few others decided to head out and find more chairs and tables. When their backs were turned and they were walking out, a very sharp dagger whizzed by Flynn’s ear and hit the wall an inch away from where he put his hand. Everyone jumped at the thump and he turned, wide-eyed back to the landing. Y/N stood there with Kaz behind her. “Next time he won’t stop me from killing you,” she threatened. Flynn and the others recoiled in fear and simply nodded. “Off you go then,” she dismissed them.

Specht and Rotty watched as Kaz stepped aside and let Y/N go up the steps first and saw his hand hover the small of her back as they disappeared back upstairs. “All hail the king and queen,” they joked and went on with their cleaning.

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I hope you enjoyed this and again please send feed back! Request away my darlings! xoxo

#imagines #fandom imagines #six of crows #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker imagine #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #six of crows imagines #kaz brekker fic #trulivin #multifandom imagines #grishaverse #grisha #crooked kingdom

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elleberquist6 · 6 years

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Believe in Me - chapter thirty-two

Summary: Dan Howell is living at home while he’s saving money for college, which isn’t easy since his parents don’t understand him. Unlike them, he loves dogs, is a vegetarian, has no interest in the family business, and he despises the supernatural. He struggles to accept things that are illogical, even though he is a kitsune. Kitsune are foxes whose powers involve the ability to cast illusions, but Dan just wants to be normal. Phil Lester has just moved to London, where he works as a dog walker. When his path crosses with Dan, Phil is eager to get to know him. Unfortunately, Phil soon finds that being friends with Dan is far more complicated than he could have imagined.

Rating: Mature Word Count: 1850 Warnings: Slow Burn, Eventual Smut

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Kitsune fact: One belief is that when a kitsune changes shape, its hoshi no tama holds a portion of its magical power. Another tradition is that the pearl represents the kitsune's soul; the kitsune will die if separated from it for long. Those who obtain the ball may be able to extract a promise from the kitsune to help them in exchange for its return. For example, a 12th-century tale describes a man using a fox's hoshi no tama to secure a favor:

"Confound you!" snapped the fox. "Give me back my ball!" The man ignored its pleas till finally it said tearfully, "All right, you've got the ball, but you don't know how to keep it. It won't be any good to you. For me, it's a terrible loss. I tell you, if you don't give it back, I'll be your enemy forever. If you do give it back though, I'll stick to you like a protector god."

The fox later saves his life by leading him past a band of armed robbers. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitsune]

Phil got a call from a number that he didn’t know while he was dropping off Rotty at his home. The number was local though, so he answered curiously, “Hello?”

“Hello, is this Phil Lester?”

“Um, yes?” Phil responded nervously.

“I work for security at the mall. I’m calling on behalf of Daniel Howell, who provided me with your contact information. He fainted and is currently resting on a sofa in the security office. Someone needs to pick him up.”

Phil took a deep breath to calm himself. “I’m coming. Thank you.”

When the security officers directed him to the empty office where they said Dan was sleeping, Phil hesitantly pushed open the door, unsure what he expected to see. Like the mall security had said, Dan was stretched out on a sofa. His eyes were closed and his hand was hanging off the side with his fingers brushing the floor, the sight of which bothered Phil. Phil hastily shut the door and ran to the side of the sofa, gently picking up Dan’s hand by the wrist and placing it on his stomach.

Dan’s eyelids fluttered. He looked at the hand now resting on his stomach and then at Phil. His eyes widened. “You.”

“Yeah, it’s me.” Phil knelt beside the sofa and brushed the hair back from Dan’s forehead, noting how clammy and pale his skin was. “How do you feel, sweetheart?”

Dan ignored his question and tugged on the front of Phil’s shirt. Phil leaned closer, thinking that Dan was trying to kiss him, but Dan’s pawing at his shirt only became more frantic and he shot Phil an annoyed glance. “Where is it? What have you done with it?”

Phil shook his head. He thought he knew what Dan was asking about, but his tone confused him and the wildness in his eyes was scary.

It became even more terrifying when Dan’s eyes welled with tears and his chest started hitching with sobs. “What do you want with it? It’s mine. It won’t do you any good. Give it back please.”

Phil shook his head. “You told me to hold it for you. I can’t give it back now. We’ve only just started. I’ll give it back to you eventually, but it’s safe for now. Don’t worry.”

These words only seemed to upset Dan further. “You don’t understand, I need it. I need it right now. I can feel the empty place where it is supposed to be like a gaping hole, and it hurts. Why do you want me to feel like this? I thought you loved me.” He ignored the way that Phil shook his head and the pained expression on his face. Dan continued, “At least let me hold it for a second. Please. I’m so weak right now.”

“Let him hold it,” said a voice.

Phil looked around, but he didn’t see anyone. The voice was familiar though, so Phil guessed, “Adam? Are you here?”

Adam appeared at his side and nodded. “Let him hold it for a minute. He’s hurt and it will help.”

Phil nodded and pulled the watch out of his shirt by the chain. Dan grabbed for it and clutched the watch. The motion jerked Phil’s neck at a slightly uncomfortable angle, but he quickly forgot at the sight of Dan closing his eyes and shaking while clutching the watch with a white-knuckled grasp. Phil shifted wide eyes to Adam’s face. “What happened to him?”

Adam snorted as he stared at Dan. “That’s his hoshi no tama, isn’t it? The idiot tried to cast a massive illusion without it – the source of his power. He could have accidentally killed himself.”

Phil swallowed heavily as he looked at Dan, who was still shuddering. He could have lost Dan today; he didn’t know how to process this information, so he just stared at Dan’s face, noting the signs of life there as Dan breathed in short, puffing breaths.

“So,” Adam said, drawing Phil’s attention. “My brother is trying to become human?”

Phil nodded warily, remembering the fact that someone in Dan’s home had ripped the information about becoming human out of a book.

Adam frowned, looking at the death grip that Dan had on the watch. “I should have known he would do something like this. I shouldn’t have told him to cast an illusion. Of course the stupid kid wouldn’t know he could hurt himself like this if he didn’t have his hoshi no tama. This is my fault.”

Phil sighed, tired of the Howell family’s constant guilt trips – he didn’t mind offering reassurances, but he was kind of worn thin after all that Dan had required of him recently. Still, he had to try, so he said, “It’s not your fault, Adam. You couldn’t have known that Dan and I had decided to do this.”

“I should have known,” Adam said with a shake of his head before focusing on Phil again. “So, did you guys figure out what kind of kitsune he is? Is it something bad?”

“Yes, we think he’s a nogitsune. We read a description, and it seemed to fit. He didn’t feel like himself the other day. He pulled some pranks that went too far. He even quit his job, walking out in the middle of a shift because he couldn’t remember why he was working. He just wants to be himself again, and this is a way to make that happen. I’m not pressuring him to do this – I just want to help him.”

Adam nodded. He looked like he was about to say something when he glanced at Dan, and his attention was caught by the tremor that shook Dan’s body.

Phil stared helplessly at Dan too, unsure what to do. Adam seemed to think that holding the hoshi no tama would help, so Phil didn’t know what to do but wait. As he sat there, he thought of something that he needed to ask and started hesitantly, “Adam… do you know why a book in your grandma’s library would have pages torn out of it? The pages that we needed to read to know about hoshi no tama? I’m just wondering because you seem to know about this stuff, and we had to go online to find it.”

“Hmm…” Adam mused, not seeming too interested in the topic, but he answered Phil. “I don’t know who would do that to Grandma’s book. I’ve never been too interested in her library, but I know what I do because she told me. When I became a spirit, she talked to me about hoshi no tama because if I become human I could get my body back. The funny thing was that she said not to tell anyone else what she had told me, it had to be our secret.”

Phil stared with wide eyes at the watch clasped in Dan’s hands as he asked, “Adam, did you try it? Did you try to become human and it didn’t work?”

Adam snorted. “No, I’m not giving anyone my hoshi no tama. There’s no human who I would trust with it, no offense.”

Phil returned Adam’s smirk, and then they looked back to Dan. Dan had finally relaxed with sleep, as his breathing had evened and his grip had slackened around the watch. “He looks a bit better,” Phil commented, noting that Dan’s skin was less sweaty and pale.

“Yeah, he does.” Adam cleared his throat. “Listen, Phil… you’ve got this, right? Can I leave him with you?”

Phil looked up with narrowed eyes. He asked in a hard voice, “Are you bored again?”

Adam shook his head. “It’s just that I feel awful about today. I could have gotten him killed. I don’t know how I’ll be able to look him in the eyes when he wakes up.”

Phil frowned. “He’s not going to blame you.”

“I blame me,” Adam said as he rose from his knees and started for the door. “Bye, Phil.”

Phil watched the spirit fade from sight just before he passed through the door. He sighed as he looked at Dan, wishing that he had some help. He wasn’t sure what Dan was going to be like when he woke up, and the memory of the suspicious and wild-eyed Dan from earlier was scary. As he thought about it, Phil decided to bring Dan back to the funeral home, where maybe his grandmother would have some advice.

“Hmmm,” Dan sighed, making Phil’s eyes dart to his face. Dan gave him a wide smile as he shifted sleepily on the sofa, the watch completely forgotten as he stretched. “Phil…”

“Hi, sweetheart,” Phil said with a startled laugh as he ran his fingers through Dan’s curls “How do you feel?”

“Sleepy. Really tired actually.” Dan bit his lip as he looked at Phil with worried eyes. “Why am I so exhausted? Where am I? I don’t remember how I got here. The last thing I remember was hanging out with my brother at the mall.”

“You’re still in the mall. Don’t worry. You’re fine.”

Dan took a deep calming breath. “I don’t feel fine. I feel like I need to sleep for like a decade. What’s wrong with me?”

“It’s okay,” he said as he rubbed Dan’s arm soothingly. “You’re going to be fine. We were just about to leave. We’re going home, and then you can take a nap.”

“Alright, let’s go then.” As Dan sat up, exhaustion settled over him and he became putty in Phil’s hands.

Phil helped him to stand up and walk to the door, and then down the hallway. As Dan leaned against him, Phil reveled in the familiarity of the body pressed against him – his warmth and softness. He knew this body so well, and he took comfort in it. Because Phil couldn’t shake the uneasiness that he felt at the thought of the wild-eyed person who had grabbed at the watch around his throat. That person didn’t seem like his Dan. So, who had he been?

#phandom #phanfiction #dan and phil #dan x phil #kitsune #magical realism #illusion

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whimsically-ominously-auspice · 5 years

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We are at Sonic, 99 cent regular size burritos today-must mention ad, my older brother wanted chili cheese tots (i need onion and mustard on mine), pretzels, drink, my mom ordered my dad some things.

So Annabelle and i ordered. I smoked, she ate moz sticks. Ours was $7. We saved our burritos for home, hers was egg and cheese only. Mine sausage.

The rest of my sciatic nerve was killing me. Took me awhile to figure out what it was, i even asked last night some of the muscle trained peoples what they thought it was. So I just have a stem coming from the spine. A short, probably not a new nerve growth because (im not saying my doctor sucks because there's a method to the madness) i haven't had sciatic pain and i know for a fact as well as my currently recurred sinus pain is caused by situations i am in. Could be a new growth, idk but the doctor tests nerves and they're close together and we're not using florscopy to look in my body while holding something that can paralyze me for life. So better safe and repeat than sorry. Of course i could be wrong and a cyst is putting pressure on my motor nerve. Because the doctor tests as i said and I fall asleep or am in and out and when he tests the motor nerve it shakes my leg. And so i feel a similar pain as i do now. Except i hear the doctor when hes needling me and he says "thats not it" "nope" "i cant get it" "lets just move on for now" so i assume we have a sciatic branch under a motor nerve. This is why i trust my doctor. If you're curious, measure straight across from the tip of your ass crack to the middle of your butt cheek, the size of my hand from the crack. Then pivot your middle finger so its pointed down and i got a nice hunk of Matt handle fat and that whole palm are hurts but when on opiates/narcotics and CBD and muscle relaxer and neuropathic pain medication, it hurts straight across from my crack and doesn't radiate but comes in like a dagger on each literal heart beat.

So I'm feeling like shit. Exhausted. Emotionally, mentally, physically, my mom is pissed cause my dad wants a sausage,burrito and she wants me to get a BBLT which no one,wants cause that's all she buys. And shes starting her psycho drama bull shit. Which just ended in "you didn't give me money" and her well you had money to,get coffee at the gas station and my dad saying "shes not going to give you a real reason, shes going,to,say something you would,say because that's all you understand"

I never told her i would use my money although im the type to do so. I told her my brother gave me money, when she asked if i needed it before i left, cause she was working outside. My brother will give me $40 to buy food and he only get a $9 meal. But i had to use my own money. Cause it was $17.58 and i gave the girl a $1 tip.

The girl looked scared. I think it was the energy in the air. I was struggling to ignore it. I don't like guns. They make life unfair. If you walk up to me, i have a chance to make,a semi-plan. If i walk up to you, you have a chance to make a plan. With a gun, there's nothing. No chance to defend. Which is common sense. Unless God jams the gun. Inexperience is scariest cause then it increases the chance a misfire could occur. I guess that's why some of us like the dark. Mother Nature can be a safety shield. I do use her.

You have heard the beginning and the almost end of one story. What do you think has happened at Sonic to cause this eerieness???

Did I stand up in the sunroof waving my magic crystal wand?

Am I randomly attacking people with my new JLO purse by hitting people in the back of their heads for having their window open?

Did I go inside and take over the Mic to sing "Fuck tha Police"?

No.

So we sitting there just having ordered everyone else's food so it would be hot and fresh upon delivery.

And the Sentra of a century pulled in blaring his music about idk what. Annabelle and i made fun of him cause it sounded like he was singing about tater tots. Then later the song was about hot tamales. Swear.

So I'm still mostly sitting straight with my head back against the seat, eyes closed and smoking cause that doesn't hurt. (There is a sciatic position for sitting I learned at physical therapy) and i feel my kid dodge and say something.

Its literal too much pain to turn my neck but I do cause my kid is all "omg" and its not a good. I say "what?" "He has a gun!!!!"

I'm all no he,doesn't but my eyes flash up at him and I see him pull back as if hes just loaded or checking/playing while its empty.

I'm strongly feeling hes empty. Strongly. Yet I am extremely aware how vulnerable I am if hes not or has bullets within reach. My kid gets down lower than the window without me telling her to.

Fear is suffocating. I know my kid is startled like Hell. Idk if anyone else inside saw. The car hop is weary, yet i see that look often with just loud music -- because usually those people are disrespectful.

And IDK where he came from. So IDK if I'm,praying or being told the guy isn't there to harm,me.

Well I mean like if he is, what am i gonna do?

Besides all was in the air,was pure,fear.

Danger is something completely different feeling... You know when you watch a cat on tv stalk,a,prey and you get that warm dark comforting feeling? I didn't,have that.

It was pretty sunny, Philadelphia.

But I was annoyed cause my kid was startled and there was a little Mercedes skin between hers and his. Even if I know I'm safe. I don't trust that someone put bullet proof materials on my car before i got it.

So the kid refuses to look at me.

Finally we get our food and we can leave.

My kid feels free to laugh again. "He has an apple watch and an iphone 5"

Then the kid feels free to speak.... He was a messenger. I accept his message. And i thank him.

So i tell my dad and his answer is a double barrel shot gun.

God's is a German Shephard.

Denise's is a rottie.

How do i deal with those situations? Neither one of us are there. Thats what i express. Im not there, the gun isnt and whoever has the gun. Why? If they're planning on criminal behavior, then they feel safe to know im not,a,witness. Idc they rob someone or kill them. I dont want to be robbed nor killed. So they're on their own just as they were before I saw them.

If they are robbing, and its fast and easy ill,cheer them on. I honestly do not give a,fuck.

I'm,not about to be in some petty none sense drama that i wasnt in in the first place.

Oh yeah sure Sabrina but you're a key board warrior. Hell fuck yes i am. And bring your shit. Try me out. You're gonna get a hugely different response if you're all about me.

See the difference? Dont be about me and leave me alone. And i see nothing.

Unless i have to.

Cause we all know I'm a tattle tale.

So hopefully old boy knows where to pick up his tamales.

Cause I'm sure they will be just fine.

Also before this occurred.

I was analyzing the message of my, get this, sigh Attica.

Which was about the same person my gun totting friend was messaging about.

And unfortunately Mr I steal eggs and sperm to create white kids to abuse left his information about how to deal with criminals and their behavior.

Which unfortunately was mostly, just let them do it.

And so they are saying themselves they need to stop following that formula.

Now Mr Gun had the same answer but a different one than i was thinking (for once)

But his is best.... For my peace.

Of course live and let live, let people have a chance to grow has also been active.

For Denise it doesnt work.

So my choice is really none -- as I do not have to make that choice. I'm not going to do either one as i am not qualified to do either. However both as explained to me that i will remain unharmed (emotionally,mentally,physically--- 2 of which are about people i love being hurt as well) and so i accept either or both choices being carried out.

The,wind is nice and cooling,today. Pretty excited! :) kinda got,a little sandblast to the teeth BUT NOT my face.

So mother nature says mush!!!!

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elleberquist6 · 6 years

Text

Believe in Me - chapter twenty-one

Rating: Mature Word Count: 1809 Warnings: Slow Burn, Eventual Smut

—

Kitsune fact: Kitsune Seduction - A form of mind control, the kitsune ability of 'seduction' is one of the most commonly-mentioned skills in legends. By using their tail or tails in a swaying manner, or by meeting the gaze of a target, the kitsune is capable of taking over their mind. While under the control of the kitsune, the victim sees, thinks, and lives in a world designed by the kitsune, all inside the target's mind. The target is controlled until someone breaks the magic the kitsune's using. [https://littlespacefox.weebly.com/kitsune-mythology.html]

~ 15 days ~

Dan didn’t seem to be in the best place emotionally as they left the museum – he was quiet and had a distant look on his face. As Phil checked the time on his phone, he bit his lip. Dan asked, “Do you have to go back to work?”

The words startled him, and Phil nearly dropped his phone as he looked at Dan. “Yeah, actually. I don’t want to leave yet. Where are you headed? I can walk you there.”

“I don’t have anywhere to be.” Dan said with a shrug. Then he looked up with a hopeful glance at Phil. “Hey, do you think that dog would mind if I tagged along?”

Phil beamed at him. “That sounds perfect. I think Rotty liked you. Let’s go.”

The dog gave Dan a few suspicious glances, but he didn’t growl. Dan didn’t risk trying to pet him again while they were in public, in case Rotty became agitated and caused Dan’s tail to appear, and so the walk went without incident while they strolled through the park.

Dan and Phil purposely kept talk to inconsequential things, seeming wary of the heavier topics after the museum. This changed only after Phil took the dog back home and brought up the subject of where they were going next. “So,” Phil said as they started strolling in the direction of his apartment. “Do you have somewhere else you want to be? You’ve seen a lot of me today. I’ll understand if you need a breather.”

Dan shook his head. “No, no breather. If you’re not tired of me, I’d like to go back to your place with you. Phil… you know how I keep saying things are going to happen ‘in a couple weeks’? Well, the countdown officially starts tomorrow. I’m turning 21 in exactly 14 days from tomorrow, and I’ve been thinking about how I want to spend those days. I want to see you every day and I want to spend every night in your arms. Please?”

Phil had wanted to deny again that something bad was going to happen, but as he saw the vulnerability and desperation in Dan’s eyes, all he could do was nod. He reached for Dan’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “Of course. I want to be with you as much as possible, too.”

They jogged up the stairs of the apartment and Phil opened the door for them. As Phil opened his mouth to suggest something for dinner, Dan lunged and clamped his mouth down on Phil’s. He was stiff with surprise, but Dan’s lips were soft and Phil relaxed against him and enjoyed the moment.

Phil allowed Dan to lead him to the next room between kisses, and then they were on the sofa. Dan tugged off his black t-shirt before working on the buttons of Phil’s shirt while Phil stared at him, taking in the sight of his flushed cheeks, unkempt curls, and the slight way his hands were shaking as he worked on removing Phil’s shirt.

They had only been together once so far, and it had been perfect – soft, and slow, and sweet. It seemed like Dan wanted a quick fuck right now, and Phil wasn’t sure if he could do that since he cared so much about Dan. Did Dan feel the same way? He had said that he liked Phil when they first started dating, but Phil’s memory of that moment was now colored by what he had learned about Dan. It seemed like convenient timing that he had come into Dan’s life at this moment when Dan most wanted to spend his nights in someone’s bed. What if Dan didn’t really care about him at all? What if Dan was only here for sex?

As Dan undid the last button of Phil’s shirt, he looked up at Phil, his chocolate-brown eyes shimmering. All Dan said was, “Please.”

Phil took a small bottle of lube from the pocket of his jeans before removing them. As he watched Dan shimmy out of his own jeans and toss his t-shirt onto the floor, Phil decided that he would do anything Dan wanted. If Dan didn’t really care about him, then that was okay – he cared enough for the both of them. In fact, Phil had to admit to himself that he didn’t just care about Dan. He loved him, but he didn’t think that Dan wanted to hear that right now. Dan leaned back into the sofa, smiling as Phil came closer. Phil drizzled some lube on his fingertips and rubbed them together to warm it. He placed the bottle aside and them ran his free hand over Dan’s side, admiring the softness of his skin. This seemed to make Dan impatient, as he huffed with a soft sigh. “Please, I need you.”

“Okay,” Phil said, moving his other hand between them.

Dan opened his thighs for Phil and gasped as Phil pushed a lubed finger into him. As the finger moved gently in and out of him, a crease appeared between his eyebrows. “I can take another. Please, go faster.”

He gave Dan what he wanted, pushing a second finger into him and then a third a moment later – he knew that Dan wanted this fast and didn’t care if his body had fully adjusted, but Phil was still being careful not to hurt him. Finally when Phil was sure that Dan was ready, he climbed on top of him, slicked lube over his length, and sunk into Dan’s body. Dan shifted his hips up and put his hands against the small of Phil’s back, pressing there as he wanted Phil kept going until he was fully inside. So, Phil gave him what he wanted.

When Phil paused to give Dan a moment, Dan only allowed himself a few seconds before urging Phil to start moving. As Phil tried to soften what they were doing with kisses to the side of Dan’s neck, Dan begged for it to be rougher as he scratched Phil’s back. And Phil couldn’t refuse. He slammed himself harder into Dan’s body, and honestly he had to admit that he loved the sounds that Dan was making: soft groans that melted to moans when Phil found his prostate.

Then Dan was shuddering beneath him as he came with his eyes squeezed tightly shut. The eyes opened when he felt Phil, who was still hard, starting to pull out of him. He pressed his thighs together to hold Phil in place. “No, don’t go. Use me.”

“Alright. I’m close.” Phil started moving again at a gentler pace, and Dan allowed it as whatever desperate need in him that had wanted it rough had been sated. Then, Phil buried himself deep inside Dan’s body when he came. As Phil brushed the curls back from Dan’s sweaty forehead, his heart gave a painful squeeze when Dan smiled at him. In that moment, he could almost believe that Dan loved him too.

A familiar buzzing roused Phil from his dreams. It wasn’t the sound of his alarm. Someone was calling him. He was still half-asleep when he picked up his phone from the nightstand and accepted the call, saying in a scratchy voice, “Hello?”

“Child!” It was his mum, and the cheeriness in her voice made him wince. He loved her, but something about her peppiness made him wish he had some coffee before attempting to have a conversation this early in the morning. “Sorry, did I wake you?”

“Yes, but it’s okay.” He said after clearing his throat. Honestly, he had wanted to sleep for a couple more hours, but he was awake now and wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep easily. His mum was a morning person, and he had long ago accepted the fact that she often woke him before his alarm. “Was there something you needed?”

“Yes, I was just making sure that you were able to get off work.” When he didn’t say anything, she clarified, “For your brother’s birthday?”

Phil sat bolt upright with a gasp. He had forgotten about Martyn’s birthday. Well, not completely. He remembered to schedule time off work weeks in advance and he had even glanced at the train schedule and planned what ticket he would buy – it was only recently that he forgot. Phil glanced beside him in bed to where Dan was lying. He was on his stomach, naked with just a tangled sheet wrapped around his hips. His eyes were closed and his breathing was even, so Phil’s phone call hadn’t woken him yet. Phil thought about slipping out of bed to finish the call, but the movement might wake Dan, so Phil decided to just keep his voice down.

He hadn’t responded, so Mum asked, “You weren’t able to get off work?”

“Oh, I did,” Phil said in a low voice. “It’s just that… I forgot about it after.”

“Is something wrong?” Mum asked in concerned.

Phil sighed and decided to tell the truth because he hated worrying her. “I’ve been seeing someone, and I sort of promised him that I would be hanging out with him on those days.”

“Oh!” Mum said in a bright voice. “Well, it’s nice that you’re seeing someone. So, you have plans to go somewhere on the day of your brother’s party? Or could you just bring this person with you?”

He gaped at the suggestion while staring at Dan. Would Dan want to come with him? Phil told his mum, “I’ll have to ask him first. Maybe. You and Martyn wouldn’t mind if I brought him?”

“Of course not, especially not if that’s the only way you can come. We miss you,” she said, and then he heard a teapot whistling in the background. “I have to go. Let me know once you know if you’re able to come. Bye, Child. Love you.”

“Bye, Mum. Love you, too.” He hung up and placed the phone back on his nightstand. Phil still didn’t think that he would be able to fall asleep again now that he was awake, but he was happy to settle back against his pillows. Dan continued to breathe evenly in his sleep. Phil watched him, memorizing the placement of the freckles on his cheeks.

#phandom #phanfiction #dan and phil #dan x phil #kitsune #magical realism #illusion

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