#and they’re still so confident!!

[whaliiwatching]

diagnoses u with fanfic tags

yeah i caved. welcome spideysona

their universe is 1990s san francisco. by day they work as a struggling writer for the bugle, sort of following in the footsteps of (movie-adjacent) eddie brock; by night they’re spider-scrawl, fighting systemic injustice, writers’ block, and the occasional mad scientist invention. his world is less rife with supernatural evils than most, but he’s also fucking with the government and corporations and all, so it balances out

their unique thing is that they have, like, shitty meta clairvoyance in the form of inherently understanding tropes, clichés, story structure, etc. like if cinemasins/wins were a superhero. they were approached to join the society because miguel thought they’d be chill or even helpful with canon events—unfortunately scribble here is not whatsoever into following rigid plot structure for the sake of unnecessary thematic suffering, saw the plot twist a miles away, and peaced. but not before snagging a day pass so they could watch atsv in person

they never take off their mask, and no one knows their name—he says it’s because he doesn’t want to lose his identity in a sea of spider-people, leading most to theorize that san-fran-spidey is some flavor of peter parker, but who’s to say for sure? the doylist reason, which he is in fact aware of, is that i don’t know either lol

#spider man: across the spiderverse #spidersona #spider scrawl #spider punk #spider noir #hobie brown #noirpunk #just a tad ;) #brass tacks means facts! #haha do you get it miles like a mile away but miles was the one wh— #so anyway sona shit #eddie in their universe has left the bugle for better things (read: got fired movie style) #still a bangin journalist tho and scrawl aspires to be like him #their deadpool is just as meta as them. they’re buddies #usually i’m not one for sonas but this was fun #static and colors inspired by that can u ever forgive me movie from 2018 #scrawl puts on the mask to feel more confident about fighting the system #hopin & prayin it’ll do the same for me :’)

[rickybaby]

Daniel Ricciardo for GQ Australia | BTS

#the way he’s been looking so tall lately 🫠 #the first one? the serious expression even as they’re still setting up the shot?? #and the slight cocked hip?? the confidence?? #it makes me feel faint 😵‍💫 #daniel ricciardo #gq

[totaled-drama]

OK SO apparently in the new game, the bestie and enemy stats actually do something.

If someone is on the same team as their bestie, their stats go up. If they’re put on the same team as their enemy, their stats go down.

They all have different default stats that remain the same at the beginning no matter what, but that default will change automatically when they have a bestie or an enemy on their team.

So like when Wayne and Raj are on the same team, their stats go up. When Damien and Scary Girl are on the same team, Damien’s stats go down and Scary Girl’s go up.

And I think that’s really neat!!!!

#td talks #total drama #Wayne making Raj’s confidence go up when they’re on the same team :’) #I’m still learning about this game so please correct me if I’m wrong btw

[coffeemira]

need an age regression/de-aging fic where a post-KH4 riku has to take care of a younger sora, and bb sora is just completely awestruck over how strong and kind and pretty (and tall!!) his best friend riku got… and is so transparently smitten that riku, who is actually dating present-day sora, is just like: wow we really were oblivious how did either of us miss sora’s glaring crush on me??

#soriku #i’m picturing like… sora right before kh1 or post-kh2 #old enough to have butterflies over this other riku but not quite old enough to know what it means yet #just a puppy crush #there’s angst potential too if it’s kh2 sora before he found his riku #so he throws himself sobbing at older riku #but a BBS sora bouncing around teen riku would be very cute also #anyway i would write it myself but i don’t have the time #also am not confident about writing children #i just want riku getting to see firsthand that he wasn’t the only one pining for years and years #and that sora always loved him even at his worst #8yo sora doesn’t care that his riku teased him sometimes he still wants to play games with big riku #10yo sora doesn’t understand why his riku said they’re too old to hold hands #and is thrilled that big riku is happy to give him hugs and ruffle his hair #kh1 sora doesn’t care about their old ‘rivalry’ or that his riku was working with maleficent #he is just overjoyed to learn that riku came back to the side of light and that they get to be friends again #kh2 sora is loud about how much he missed him and very impressed by how far riku has come as a keyblade master #(also blushes when he sees him working out and then is confused as to why) #(i am thinking of that one manga panel where sora talks about riku’s “big arms” and how he can carry big logs by himself lmfao) #any of these soras would follow a cool older riku around like a duckling and be wowed by everything he does i am convinced

[fleshdyke]

bones have been washed with hand soap and water. not a whole lot of degreasing to do since they’re pretty old and a lot of it has been done by nature already but they could definitely use some. gotta find a container to put them in and i will start degreasing 👍

#still don’t know what animal they’re from #looking a little more closely at the inside of the bones i’m less confident that it’s a mammal? idk the difference between bird and mammal #bone lattice structures but yeah i’m a little less confident about it being a mammal now #they do seem kinda big for a chicken though. we do have wild turkeys around here but the bones seem a little small in that regard #and they almost NEVER come up and wander around neighborhoods like where i found the bones #i’ll have to check if the vulture culture subreddit is still up and running bc i feel like they’re my best bet for id at this point #gonna wait until the bones are dry tho i didn’t feel like drying them with a towel lmao #(normally you would just go straight to degreasing but these had obviously been there for a while and were covered in dirt so i just wanted #to wash most of the mud and shit off of them before i start degreasing) #rambles

[seldomsee]

People who care about power scaling in hunter x hunter are so funny. “Ohh who would win in a fight Gon or Killua” if Gon and Killua ever versed each other it would be like that one episode of Spongebob where Spongebob and Patrick are in a wrestling match but their pants fall down to reveal they’re wearing matching underwear and they start crying and hug and refuse to fight. It would be just like that

#hxh #they’re so spongecoded. #<-what does that mean @me #theres even a part In The Story where Bisky looks at the camera and goes ‘power levels do not matter. there are too many factors to #consider in a fight other than nen levels to confidently determine who will win. power scaling is sstupid shut the fuck up’ #and yet i still see hxh fans on youtube obsessing over it. #another power scaling video got recommended to me on youtube. anyways

[explodingchaos]

Yknow with more 3 screen time if they kill him the same way they did axol

Also I don't think the episode was the end of Mr puzzles because

if it was that's just sad

if it isn't though. We'll. We could have a repeat. Just in a different context. A little different vibe. But same nonetheless.

'but why don't we kill four-' he's the main character the series is called smg4 not Mario and friends or something

so yeah uh anyways three will die tragically one day and I will be the first one to bet on it

(I DONT HÂTE THREE OR SMG34 IM JUST SAYING. THERES DEATH FLAGS)

Absolutely! I’m 100% sure that we haven’t seen the last of him yet. The recent SMG4 community post mentions that we will possibly be seeing him again if we want more. And considering the amount of positive feedback of Mr.zestfest over here (even outside the community which to me is crazy), I’m very positive we will be seeing him again. Just not right now as things need to chill for a bit. And when he does come back, who knows what he’ll do next?

And yeah, I feel like if they were to kill off one of the idiotic lovers, it would definitely be Three. Of course, we’re talking very very hypothetical. They’ve already done so much for SMG3 (merch and development wise) that killing him off would set half of the fandom ablaze, and cause issues within the show itself. And also, I just wanna point out how tragic each couple presented in glitch productions is.

Literally haven’t seen a happy main couple yet (swag and sonic don’t count in this case). Axol literally had to sacrifice himself by making MELONY kill him. Right after they both confessed to eachother. And then N and Uzi having there own situation right now (Uzi literally scarificed herself. And she’s in space. I think, I’m not entirely educated on MD lore). Oh, and I don’t know if this counts (I’m sure it doesn’t, but just because they were close friends) Meggy and desti. Desti was killed right in front of Meggy, and she could not do anything about it other than watch. AND THE THING IS, even if desti did live, Meggy would have been the one to die based of the episode “SMG4: WHAT IF?….”. Doomed yuri goes crazy actually.

But yeah. Imagine if they were to actually make SMG4 and SMG3 cannon. Something is bound to happen, and it would not end well. Not sure what it would be, but it would definitely doom their relationship 😭

#smg4 #smg3 #smg34 #im confident that they wouldn’t kill three or four off #because they are like #fan favorites and main characters #in which their deaths would affect majority of the series #but I still wish for something tragic to happen to them #not death though 😭 #… #maybe a little but VERRY /hj #Also I was gonna mention Belle and Lucinia #but I never watched meta runner #so I don’t know if they’re cursed with doomed relationship problems #anyways #enough rambling #Hope you enjoy it though!

[foreverppl]

Moodboard for Amais Rena (he/they), lead singer of alt rock band Way Way Downers @infamous-if

Playlist

#catch them being like ‘what happened to the MUSIC???’ every time some reality tv show drama goes down lmfao #having them be a homewrecker by romancing mrs. valentine so we’ll see how that goes #but also after playing the demo i’ve fallen down the seven rabbit hole and i CANNOT get out omg #anyway personality facts ig: #they toe the line between confident and arrogant but ONLY when it comes the music #like he’d never call himself the best but they know that they’re a good singer and the band makes good music #so they don’t usually care to listen to criticisms that say otherwise #can be a little intense and takes things way too seriously somtimes #loves their bandmates to death so he was def put off a little by g in that one convo #is OBSESSED with doing the pop punk voice/accent much to the dismay of everyone around them. they think it’s the most hilarious thing ever #still feels really guilty abt what went down w seven so is just sorta… taking whatever they dish atp #okay at social interactions just veers more on the detatched polite side of things in interviews/w fans and other ppl they don’t know #which is veryy different from how they are on stage. #on stage they fully embody the music and let themselves do whatever feels right. no inhibitions. a complete release. #lover of tight pants and nice cuban heeled boots #is pretty responsible but has issues being told what to do prob stemming from the whole absent parent thing (srry orion) #can play piano but only the basics. only learned to help with the songwriting process. #if underground wastebasket has a million haters amais is one of them. if underground wastebasket has one hater they are that one. #if underground wastebasket has no haters that means amais is dead. #my mcs #if: infamous #mc: amais rena (infamous) #mb

[miahasahardname]

leenage gutant binja turtles

#hello tmnt community! i bring you these… things as an offering! #will i return? …possibly not! #(still not all confident about drawing the turts but i have SO many ideas for an au. they’re just don’t make a lot of sense yet) #also wondering why the first drawing is a much higher quality than the other three? #that’s because those other three are doodles i did in my physics jotter three(?) weeks ago and decided to trace and colour! #yippeeeeeeee #anyways i love tmnt 2012. i know venus is here and she’s not actually IN tmnt 2012 but i wanted to draw her in this style so. yeah #sunset duo in 2012 is so good that’s why i had to draw them cheering eachother on #they are their number one haters and number one fans #tmnt raph #tmnt leo #tmnt mikey #(the best version of the best ninja turtle. btw.) #tmnt donnie #tmnt venus #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #erm mmmmm……. final drawing is a shitpost i guess. #sorry if it’s bad lol #(tempted to post human designs but that would require discussing my auand uh…. yeah still not ready for that!) #i’ll be honest and say i’ve never been anxious about posting art until THIS

[littleheartbeat]

It was just a piece of fruit. A small, little, teeny tiny wedge of an apple.

Somehow, that piece was more than large enough to get wedged in my throat.

A cold feeling washed over me as my heart began to pound heavily in my head, so hard that I could feel each pulse throughout my body. Tentatively, I tried to take a breath, but found that I simply couldn’t. There wasn’t a passage of air at all.

No. No no. No, I couldn’t be choking, I couldn’t be.

You were downstairs. I had insisted on taking my apples with caramel dip to the bedroom so I could sit and relax. Funny how things turn out: A simple, calm evening turned into a life-threatening situation in an instant.

My hand reaches for my throat as I yank the covers off. In doing so, I knocked off several items from the nightstand. It would often be something I’d complain about, but in this case, it was a blessing. The crash caught your attention. Your voice calls my name from downstairs.

I scramble towards the bedroom door and do my best to shout. All that comes out of my now blueing lips is a gag. I slam my fists into my abdomen in a pathetic attempt to dislodge the fruit. I couldn’t feel it move one bit. Repeatedly, I do this. I even grab a nearby book and slam the edge of it up into my stomach.

Nothing worked.

On trembling limbs, I crawled out of the bedroom, unable to keep my drool from slipping from my lips and into the carpet. The stairs are just a few feet away, and now, you’re just a few steps away. I could make it-

My vision darkens as I began to crawl down the first few steps. My body slips and falls, colliding with nearly every step.

That is, until you meet me halfway and catch me in your strong arms. My body’s bucking and practically convulsing with pain and the lack of air. You see my pale lips, my reddened cheeks, the veins in my neck popping as my heart frantically beats away the little oxygen I have left.

You know that I’m unable to breathe, but you don’t know the cause. You simply assume that my heart is having a fit. I’m too slow in bringing my hands to my neck to signal that I’m choking.

So, you quickly tilt my head back, plug my nose, and give me as deep of a breath as you could. I can feel my cheeks expand, I could feel your breath try to make its way down my throat to my starved lungs, but it doesn’t make it there. The pressure from your air makes my ears pop. There’s no where for it to go.

You pull away and adjust my head once more, craning my neck further back in a painful manner. In response, my chest hitches higher and higher against your arms, desperate to get a single bit of your air. My hands painfully claw at my own chest, practically tearing at the material of my shirt, as if that was what was keeping my from breathing. It was as if I was trying to carve into my own body and yank the fruit out of my throat.

Once more, you offered me your air, blowing as hard as you could into me.

The air didn’t reach its destination. Once more, the apple stopped it. Only this time with the air, the fruit seemed to be pushed further down my throat.

I begin to panic more, fighting against your comforting arms and biting your lips. My hands go down to my abdomen to smack into myself once more. Compared to earlier, these are weak, pathetic slaps that barely make my body move. Was i truly this weak already?

I realized that I was dying. My head was pounding with pressure, my surroundings were already graying at the corners of my tearful eyes, and my body was fighting for some small amount of air.

Your eyes widen in both guilt and understanding. It clicked: I was choking.

On the stairs, you position yourself behind me and hook your arms around me. Your fist is placed right above my belly button, and with all of your might, you pull sharply into me.

No noise is made from me as you do this, so you do it again, and again, and again. By this point, I’m limp in your arms and my heads hanging down.

I can barely watch as your arms slam into me. I can barely feel as you begin to drag me upstairs to get me on a flat surface. I can barely feel your warm hands pressing into my cheeks to try and stir a reaction, I can barely feel your lips pressing into mine once more to give me your air, I can barely feel it fail to flow.

I can’t feel your hands as they thrust deep and hard with all of your weight into my body to try and get the apple out. I can barely see as your eyes are wild with horror and dismay. Your body bops up and down against mine. Funny, what would normally be such a pleasant sight of you on top of me is perhaps the very last thing I see.

I hear your voice.

And then I simply don’t.

Everything fades.

Part of life is that it ends.

Will you let this be the end?

#mmmmm not too crazy about this #but also I’m just off of an overnight and am thinking about choking #this is a bit of a fantasy right here #being silently killed and your partner doesn’t realize why you’re dying #so they’re using the wrong method to try and save you #and by the time they realize it’s too late #they try as hard as they can to save you but nothing works #and so comes the cpr when heimlich fails #cpr #resus #my writing #idk about it but ehhhdhdkdbdjdb #might delete I’m not confident in it- #still feeling unsure about my place here but I’d like to #i dunno have a little corner of my own

[jemmo]

i can’t tell you how much i usually hate these ignoring, distancing plots in shows and how much i absolutely adore everything about these 2 episodes of the eighth sense. like im not having a good time, and it’s fantastic.

bc the thing is, in all of this, i can’t see the right way to go, i can’t find the person to blame, i can’t find the way to make it better. I can’t single out a single moment or a thing someone did and say “this is why everything went wrong”. it’s just this coming together and rise and swell of things happening and people feeling things that has us ending up here and it feels beautifully and horribly organic bc we can’t find that point where it all went wrong. was it on that rooftop? was it at the beach? was it when they first met? was it when his brother died? was it when he was born into this family? there is no single point. it’s all of them and it’s none of them. there is truly nothing and no one to blame. and there are bad characters in the show, people you can hate, eunji and taehyung, but neither of them are to blame for any of the bad stuff that happens in the show. you’re not waiting for them to be taken down bc that doesn’t solve anything. instead, it’s just two people hurting, and not knowing how to make it better.

bc you take jaewon, and after what he says at the end of ep 8, you want to hate him, you want to be so angry at him for what he says, for how he acts, how dismissive and hurtful he is, and yet you’ve been made to understand 100% why, and not just in a “i get it but that wasn’t the right thing to do” way, in a “that was horrible and yet i know he doesn’t see any other way to handle this” way. like you don’t see this as a misstep, or a step to far, bc you know for him, in his state of mind, it is completely justified, it’s necessary. bc it not only punishes the person he blames for all of this, himself, but he sees it as a way to protect jihyun. and not even in a cliche “bad things happen when people around me, the people I love always get hurt” kinda way, but more so in that he sees that he is a scared, messy, struggling person that doesn’t know how to handle himself, and doesn’t want to inflict that on anyone, let alone the person he cares about. so what’s worse, a quick, swift blow that hurts but cuts everything off cleanly, or this prolonged relationship where he inevitably continues to weigh jihyun down with the weight of his trauma, and take it out on him. what’s the point of having a place of refuge when you ruin it more and more every time you depend on it, until it eventually can’t offer you comfort. it’s a lesser of two evils, jaewon’s choice is obvious to him.

but then you take jihyun. and we talk about masks and fronts but we never once question whether jihyun wears a mask bc he appears so sweet and innocent and naive, what can this boy possibly be putting up a front for. but i see it, this almost fake it till you make it confidence front that yes is becoming more natural. but my god just think about what he’s gone through for a second. think about it. left home for the first time in his life, moved to an unfamiliar and intimidating city with only one other person he knows, started a new job, started university, tried to build relationships, met a man that intrigues him, and perused him only to be kissed and then ignored, then maybe establish something tentative, only to then see him spiral, go on a trip where he shared his trauma, you have an intimate night together only to almost die, and then be not only ignored, but plain and simple rejected and pushed away. like… you can say all you want about jihyun growing as a person and having more courage, but no amount of growth for however many months this has been going on for can prepare you for that. for the mixed messages on steroids. for the back and forth, not knowing. to give yourself to someone like that and go through something traumatic and then be abandoned by that person. we get it, bc we see all of jaewon’s story. but apart from what jaewon shared at the beach, jihyun doesn’t know any more than that. he doesn’t know about therapy, about how his father acts towards him, about the extent of his trauma and how it manifests and affects his mental health, and how he is struggling every single day. and you can’t expect him to know the depths of that no matter how empathetic and connected he is, how much he cares about jaewon, he can’t be superhuman. and so you get why he pushes and fights for jaewon. like… he is in love. it’s clear. he’s fallen in love with him. he is this wide-eyed, open kid that fell in love with a senior. and jaewon has just messed with his head, he’s never been clear, and you can’t expect jihyun to just get past that bc he knows something is up with jaewon. he can’t know the full story, but even if he did, that can’t be a reason or a justification to be treated the way jaewon treats him. bc we’re all about jaewon putting himself first and doing what he wants and respecting himself like that, but jihyun deserves that too. and it’s such a fine line to tread when you know someone is going through something, bc again you understand why, but you’re still the one being treated that way. like we talk about jaewon’s trauma, but here jihyun was part of it, he went through that traumatic experience. he’s the one that nearly lost his life. and yes, he appears to handle it well, and no matter to what extent that’s true or not, you can’t not look at jaewon struggling and understand it and then not look at jihyun with that same understanding. it’s not about comparing trauma and pain and deciding who is suffering more, it’s seeing that there are two people in this, and they’ve both been affected, so we should give them the same level of understanding.

and that’s something jaewon has to see. that his self-preservation is selfish. that his destructive behavior doesn’t just affect jihyun, instead it feels pointed and directed, bc every way jaewon hurts himself hurts jihyun. and it comes bc jihyun was so much of what was good about jaewon’s life for a second, so attacking that is his only form of self-sabotage. he can’t mess up his relationship with his friends or parents bc they were broken in the first place, and he can’t sabotage his future bc it’s already been ruined the moment he didn’t pursue his photography major. him nearly getting kicked out of school affected him so little not just bc he wanted that punishment, but bc even that punishment meant so little to him. all these things are established and they already contribute to his suffering. removing jihyun from his life is the only active thing he can do to make himself feel worse, and he can veil it in an act of protection, and even feel like he’s doing the right thing, but that deceives them both into believing this is done from a good place, when no good can actually come of it. in trying to protect jihyun, you hurt him more. in trying to hurt yourself, you hurt him too. and when someone is in a headspace like jaewon is, you look for that thing that’ll break through. bc he is so distant, he’s trying to remove himself from reality, and jihyun needs to act as this person that can anchor him to it. when you’re trying to isolate and separate yourself, sometimes seeing that you still affect things, that there’s a persons that exists that is affected and hurt by your actions, and no matter how you try to cut yourself off, you cannot stop that, separating yourself still hurts them, maybe that’s a thing that can get through. but that’s something that depends on jaewon. ultimately, he’s the only one that can get himself out of this place, and that’s what makes it so hard, that no matter how much jihyun cares and how much he fights for him, nothing can come of that effort is jaewon doesn’t meet him there. and it’d be so easy for jihyun to give in, to take the hurt, but over the course of this show we’ve seen the strength jihyun has developed, which has only seemed to increase more so after the accident, call it a renewed vigor for life or something. he has the strength that jaewon doesn’t, to not let his pain consume him. and in a beautiful full-circle moment, it’s because of jaewon, bc when they first spoke he sparked in jihyun a want to be stronger, to be more than the country mouse, and he’s done it. and it’s that courage that means he can fight for jaewon, even in the face of rejection. he trusts himself and that he knows jaewon, the real jaewon, to see past words that are intended to hurt them both, and go after the person that’s still inside jaewon somewhere. no, he can’t do it for him, and no them being together is not some magical cure for jaewon, but it’s what can put him on a path of caring for himself again, and sometimes that has to start with caring about someone else (and suddenly I’m reminded of my beautiful man 2 and how kiyoi tries to break hira out of his worthless mindset by making him care about him, and how ultimately that can’t be enough, and that hira has to take those first steps of seeing his self worth by himself). what jihyun can do by fighting is again act as that tether to reality and try to be this representation of the good jaewon can be and do. bc look at jihyun, look at how confident and strong he has become, and look at how he got there, bc you saw that country mouse and gave him the time of day and helped him grow and gave him new experiences. you jaewon, you. and that shift in mindset, from jihyun representing hurt and the accident and the trauma of his brother and everything he can’t do, to being that light and refuge and everything he can do is again something that might breaks through. and the fact it has such narrative strength and satisfaction makes me hopeful that that’s what we might actually get.

#I did a rant #I’ve done a lot of rants actually they’re all just sitting in my notes bc they all got a little too much #my thoughts are a literal mess and I am still struggling to put them in all the right words #mostly bc the way jaewon is behaving and not to be too overinvolved is very reminiscent of *me* #and so watching him shut down and remove himself knowing it’s something i do is hard and frustrating #and I did a whole rant about it but I realised I need to separate myself from the character to be able to talk about it #so yeah #I really wanted to bring up jihyun tho #bc he presents as so strong in these two eps but you cannot argue against what he’s been through and the effect that would have on anyone #and try to see it from a perspective where we don’t know what jaewon is going through and just see his actions and realise how much he has #messed with jihyun again not at all on purpose but that 1000 to nothing jihyun went through from the trip to the accident and it’s aftermath #that’s a fucking lot #and it’s interesting that we talk so much about people putting themselves first and not putting up with shit #like I think of simon from young royals and how we celebrate him saying no to being willhelms secret as an act of self-respect #but bc we understand and empathise so much with what jaewon is going through it’s hard to make yourself even consider jihyun #but when you do see it from his side you realise it’s a lot for him too #and that you wouldn’t hate him or misunderstand him if he was mad at jaewon #and with *spoliers* is there only so much he can take of jaewon’s self sabotage hurting him until even he and his developed strength and #confidence is broken by it #he can only keep fighting for jaewon for so long and idk if it’s gonna be a case of jaewon coming round too little too late #but I just hope this isn’t easy which sounds mean I don’t want either of them to suffer more #but this isn’t a kiss and get back together and all is good #I think jaewon needs to see the bad he’s caused #bc it’s only by owning up to that that he can ground himself in the moment and see that he’s part of this world and can’t separate himself #from it and jihyun also needs to realise that no matter his headspace jaewon does want space and when someone is self sabotaging you still #have to listen and respect what they’re saying distance means distance and as much as you want to fight against it you can’t be responsible #for making it work #agh I need to stop rambling bc it’s so messy and complex and I just absolutely ADORE the level to which this situation has so many emotional #moving parts and how ultimately blameless they both are and how it makes it so much harder to see a way out it’s fantastic #the eighth sense

[saturnsorbits]

Monoma doesn’t know who he is…

While all the kids where busy getting their quirks and discovering things about themselves, Monoma found out that he’d only ever be as good as what he could steal… Learned that his quirk, quite literally, was to become something else, someone else: someone better.

It’s hard, learning that you’re not really you, but always part something more. He never really understood it, but life was always there to teach him not to question it.

He was taught this on the playground when he could only overcome a bully by stealing his levitation quirk. Had it beaten into him when new friends would ask to see his quirk and he just… Couldn’t, because he hadn’t copied anything for a while. At first he made excuses and tried to explain, but no-one is interested in being stolen from in theory or in practice.

So, screw him if he learned to deal with the fact that on his own he is nothing more than his ability to steal. Fuck him, for becoming harsh, for beginning to transform into the thing everyone else had already decided he would be…

#Marquie has me thinking so I’m climbing out of my Monoma-fucker box for a hot second… #I just think he’s a prick because he’s had to deal with so much shit; y’know? #Quirks; in essence; are an extension of one’s-self - so I can understand how someone ‘stealing/copying’ that would be uncomfortable. #Plus; kids are arseholes and I refuse to believe he didn’t fall victim to the ‘Ew you’re just copying me’ individualism argument. #So… At some point; he stopped caring. #Stopping trying to create his own identity in the ashes of everyone else’s… And just became what was expected of him. #And if it was expected for him to become a prick - Well; he guessed that was who he was. #(I think this is why he draws a super interesting contrast to Bakugo and Shinso… #Bakugo bc; One: We all saw how hot that scene was when he copied Bakugo’s quirk for the first time during the sports festival… #That was sexy shit. Don’t lie to yourself. Love him or hate him. That was fucking delicious; but anyway - #Bakugo is naturally brilliant and strong; embodies his quirk perfectly and he’s so fucking ungrateful - #it’s a wonderful contrast to Monoma who is ill-fitted to everyone else’s quirk and constantly on the back foot. #Also; they’re both the same ass for different reasons. #And Shinso; bc both of their quirks are ‘villainous’ they both take things from others [Quirks vs Control] #and have suffered in an individualistic way because of their quirks. #The only main difference between them is that Shinso is still rebelling against this ideology whereas Monoma has accepted it). #(He’s also super similar to Kaminari if we’re talking insecurity masking bc: over confidence vs humour) #Anyway. I’m going to shut up now; but I love him. Okay.

[kavehater]

I wish I could inject pasilyo into my brain so I can have permanent happiness

#There’s this specific part of the song #It srsly alters my brain chemistry #Anyways #i hate tumblr sm #Idk like I Gen hate being on here sm #No matter what account I make no matter if I tell ppl about it whether I don’t tell ppl I just hate this place soooo much #Like if I have a following it sucks because it’s rlly lonely if I don’t it’s still lonely and then if there’s nobody at all it’s lonely #Loneliness is what got me to discord boy so like :D #The fact I am genuinely missing him sm I’m gonna krill myself 😻🙏 #Also I think I hate talking to minors cause these kids be letting themselves get groomed all the time I’m so tired of seeing it #The creep in my course is being so weird to Raisa who is a minor … I can’t help but think it’s all my fault … I invited her to the pharm gc #To show her how messy it was …. #I didn’t expect her to follow and accept requests of everyone … #Anyways I just am so annoyed. Like I wish I could have one person just one where I can be confident in being their no.1 but every time I th #Think I’m maybe somewhere high up on someone’s list of important ppl I realise I overestimated my position even tho I’m rlly self conscious #And being myself down over that. Also I still hate Eid. I hate Eid sm. How do ppl genuinely enjoy Eid. Idk if I’ve ever been excited for Ei #It’s like I’m just suddenly getting more sick of ppl by the day. I Gen don’t like talking to ppl at all even tho I used to rely on talking #To others like its sustenance now it’s just such a hassle to me because I’m so sick of being unimportant to literally every single person I #Have ever known. Literally everyone except maybe dahlia idk. the only person who has never gotten mad/snapped at me o is dahlia #And knowing my luck that will soon be taken from me too. Anyways good riddance to tumblr i loathe this site and im sick of the mind games #All the time from just existing on here. Gen makes me feel ill. I’m so sick of that girl I like and sick of everyone. The only time ppl car #Is when I cause a scene. And ykw atp I loathe being showed sympathy and pity for these sorts of posts because it just feels like a big joke #Cause why couldn’t you just care when I was fine. Why do you ONLY care when I’ve had enough of your bad behaviour. How does one make someon #Like me go mad with all these things #Istg if I come back to this dumb site whether to this acc to the tora one or my other account everyone has permission to beat me up. #dora daily #Tldr;I HATE ppl and everyone ever + I’m just sick of pretending like everyone doesn’t suck cause how can ppl be so insufferable intolerable #Insane horrible in every way and ppl like them. How do they live with themselves when they’re this aggravating. Every day I hate ppl more #Because their mannerisms their everything is just so embarrassing. #Essay tags 😻😻😻

[lesbianaglaya]

revoking people’s right to talk about the tolstoy marriage until they write and turn in to me a ten page essay on complex relationships

#‘tolstoy STOLE from sophia’s diary’ almost certainly not true. #at least not in the usual vein - sophia was (and should be credited as!) at the very least his editor and collaborator #with w&p at times i want to say co author but i also dont think we should diminish the importance of editing #they worked as a team! and in the later years when thier relationship was increasingly frought they were BOTH reading each others diaries. #the problem is there is genuinely an avenue to talk about how tolstoy drew from real life in less than ethical ways #tanya bhers/natasha rostova for instance. THE KREUTZER SONATA! FOR INSTANCE! #but diminishing it down to oh he stole from her is. a disservice to both of them. #sophia confessed her love by writing a story that blatantly copied real life and lev’s personal insecurities confessed in confidence #and honestly that isnt even BAD like there is a reason they were happily married for 25 years! they’re work is similar they were a team! #we dint need to flatten it out to sophia-wife-victim lev-husband-abuser. #nor do we need to ignore the many ways sophia suffered! #it’s just theyve been reduced to a famous literary disaster marriage when they really… werent that. #gabby.txt #genuinely tanya as the inspiration for natasha is far more upsetting to me than giving his diary to sophia before the wedding. #idk. idk! its like on one hand im so fully on sophia's side and im so happy that her diaries and writing are being translated #and. not even on the other hand these ideas arent in opposition to each other. reducing her marriage to a flat picture of suffering is. bad #actually i think in many ways the problem is solved by looking at sophia as an author instead of a wife. #which like. she was very much both. but if we afford her the agency afforded to an author i think the conversation immediately gains nuance #and that also comes with the caveat of female authors being far less respected - look at nadezhda khvoshchinskaya - but still #anyway GOOOOD morning

[zetobii]

Sorry for being MIA, I’m just really not doing well at all. Like, in every way. I’m just.. idk. I’m trying, so please, please bear with me

#I can’t trust anyone I know irl #whenever I confide in anyone they use it against me #every single time. #and I so genuinely wish I was dramatizing that #even my own assault was weaponized against me #I’m just thinking out loud I guess #yelling into the void #texty #I’m still working on comms too #the one is so nearly done I swear #but the numbness in my hand is making it really hard #might have to leave comms closed for a bit once they’re done #which sucks cuz I love doing them #and I’m so fucking far in debt I need the extra funds #but like.. this snails pace is so unprofessional