#but then Andrew got to experience that devotion turned around on himself full force

[void-and-virtue]

OP I LOVED UR ANDREIL POST GOING CRAZY THINKING ABOUT IT if you have anything else in that amazing brain of yours on this take please do share because i absolutely LOVED how you articulated this aspect about andreil. its something i particularily appreciate about their dynamic and relationship with anger and Their Issues TM. your post will cross my mind whenever ill think about it from now on.

I don’t think I have ever gotten an ask and this is kind of making me go insane??? I hope you know that you made my day and also, I’m so glad people share in my endless brainrot bc when it comes to this series and these characters I simply cannot stop

It really isn’t nearly talked about enough that the thing that got Andrew to actually look at Neil and become interested was (as cited by Neil himself at some point tho I can’t remember in which book that scene is from the top of my head) Neil’s bone-deep jealousy of Kevin. It’s—it ties into that whole epiphany that Neil has at some point, when he looks at Andrew and realizes that while he is hurtling towards his own breaking point and about to burn out and shatter into something he’s not sure he’d recognize if he survived the encounter, Andrew hit that point and broke from it years ago. And that’s an understanding that goes both ways between them—in a fucked up way, it feels like Andrew might be the future that Neil has waiting for him if he doesn’t end the year six feet under: hollow and drifting, passionless after everything he had to rip away from himself to be able to survive. At the same time, Neil probably reminds Andrew of how he used to be, back when he had hope for things only to have that hope rip him apart—which is exactly where Neil seems to be headed for the majority of the story.

I think that a lot of Andrew’s understanding of Neil comes from the fact that he knows intimately what it feels like to be caught between a rock and a hard place and cut his own lifeline, only to then fail to die on impact. Neil hasn’t had to resort to that yet, but he is hanging by a thread. You’d think that watching him struggle would only serve to drive it home for Andrew that he made the right choice in closing himself off, except… well. His expectations of life and the people in it are so bleak, it’s no wonder he finds himself drawn to Neil’s messy emotions and every unexpected show of spine like a moth to a flame.

Neil, for all of his issues and scars, can still feel things—can still want something so badly it defies all logic. Can want something with such visceral, fucked-up intensity that it resonates where it shouldn’t. It’s an ability that Andrew thinks he’s either lost or cut out of himself to stay somewhat safe, sane and alive a long time ago, but that remains as the most fundamental crack in the foundation of his being. It’s a fascination that seems to come out every time he’s sober and eventually ties into him wanting Neil—wanting something worth wanting and putting a name to it once he finds it. They look at each other and don’t want a watered-down version of the person in front of them. It creates a relationship that embraces issues big and small and accepts (even values!) the messy parts of being human. It means that any space shared between them immediately becomes safe once they settle into something comfortable together. The way they handle the uglier sides of each other’s personality honestly makes me feral because it’s always done with understanding and acceptance and they even find positives or comforts there that the other can’t see and that’s probably a reason for why 1) their chemistry is so off the charts and 2) their relationship is so damn healthy (in addition to their communication being stupidly good when it comes to each other).

Andrew wants something real and Neil wants to be real. And then they get to have exactly that.

#I hope this is even somewhat coherent #this went way out of hand but it’s an aspect of them that’s so hard to put into words #something something Andrew’s almost detached fascination with intense emotions and fervor #he shows that same tendency when it comes to Kevin vs exy as well #in the sense that I’m convinced Kevin’s passion both fucks him up and mystifies him #Neil is just much more up close and personal bc yeah his original devotion that caught Andrew’s eye was to the sport #but then Andrew got to experience that devotion turned around on himself full force #you cannot tell me he was ready for that #but also also #this and the og posts were meant to be about Neil and Neil’s emotions being ugly and messy and human #and how that resonates with Andrew because even terrible feelings can be better than an emotionless void #between numbness and twisted-up falsities #Neil’s raw emotions were probably the most honest thing about him early series and he had a lot that he was never allowed to express before #and not only is Andrew safe to let go of those inhibitions around #Neil also wants for Andrew to relearn how to enjoy that same privilege with him #losing control and all that #there’s a lot that can be said about all of this and I’m really not fully finding the words but. THEM. That’s all and thank you. #also ty for the ask I was really !!! when I saw that in my inbox :)))( #aftg #all for the game #neil josten #andrew minyard #andreil #aftg meta #answered asks

[thedcdunce]

Grifter

“Now I've got another suspect. Fuck it... I'll just kill 'em both.” - Grifter

Real Name: Cole Cash

Aliases:

Deadeye

Gender: Male

Height: 6′ 3″

Weight: 195 lbs (88 kg)

Eyes: Blue

Hair: Blonde

Powers:

Gen-Factor

Abilities:

Peak Human Condition

Indomitable Will

Deception

Espionage

Master Tactician

Survival

Military Protocol

Driving

Master Marksman

Master Combatant

Weaponry

Multilingualism

Weaknesses:

The Rush

Weak Healing Factor

Equipment:

Tunic

Trench Coat

VAD PP30

Little Magnum

Various High-Tech Munitions

Universe: Wildstorm Universe

Citizenship: American

Base of Operations:

The Carrier

Halo Building, New York City

Marital Status: Single

Occupation: 

Soldier

Mercenary

Intelligence Agent

VP of Halo Corporation

First Appearance: WildC.A.T.s #1 (August, 1992)

Powers

Gen-Factor: Exposure to the Gen-Factor had gifted as well as cursed Cash with several supernatural abilities both Mental and Physical at the same time, these powers have fluctuated in potency over the coarse of his life. Eventually burning out over the years and going into dormancy thanks to his Coda training. While it's mostly diminished the psychic abilities bestowed by his Gen-Factor retains some effectiveness in it's destructive ability, Cole can utilize his psionics by consciously reordering part of his psyche to turn them on and off again. But can normally only ever have access without the debilitating side effects while in range of another Team 7 Member. Since the universal reset where Cole had been revived, he could now utilize his full abilities without any assistance or harmful effects.

Psionics

Telepathy

Sensory Scrying

Mind Control

Mind Scans

Illusion Casting

Telepathic Assault

Telekinesis

Force Field

Energy Projection

Flight

Regeneration: Cole also has access to a helpful yet extremely unstable ability to heal and recover damaged bodily tissue structure at phenomenal rates. But it's not very reliable despite it's potency, the effectiveness of which varies wildly between uses. Able to heal broken neck almost instantly after receiving it, to waiting months on end for healing two shattered legs, albeit without so much as a scratch or any scar tissue afterward.

Longevity: Cole has lived for three decades yet still maintains the appearance as well as vitality of a young man still in his prime.

Abilities

Peak Human Condition

Peak Human Strength

Peak Human Speed

Peak Human Agility

Peak Human Stamina

Peak Human Coordination

Peak Human Reflexes

Peak Human Durability

Peak Human Balance

Indomitable Will

Deception

Thievery

Surveillance

Acting

Espionage

Stealth

Disguise

Master Tactician

Survival

Military Protocol

Driving

Vehicle Combat

Master Marksman

Throwing

Master Combatant

Weaponry

Swordsmanship

Demolitions

Multilingualism: Shown to be fluent in Vietnamese.

Weaknesses

The Rush: The side effects of using this power however are terrible to say the least. It was nicknamed The Rush due to the effect that the use of it is likened unto a drug. Raw, telekinetic, energy twisting and wielding power that if left unchecked can ravage the mind and body of the wielder, driving him to insanity.

Uncontrolled Psionics: The downside to these powers was that they were nearly impossible to control, sometimes being largely unreliable when needed most.

Physical Strain: Using the powers also put a terrible strain on Cash; trying to keep them under control would often cause blood vessels to rupture and he would weaken.

Affect Mind: Prolonged use would threaten his sanity and outside forces. But his Coda training under former matriarch of which, Zealot; helped him repress this aspect greatly.

Weak Healing Factor: Cole's healing ability tends to fluctuate often despite it's impressive capacity. The more severe the damage done to him, the longer it takes for him to recover, more expediently lethal injury increases the likelihood of fatality.

Equipment

Tunic: Grifter's face wear was specially designed by S.H.I.E.L.D. tech specialists using their state of the art engineering. On top of being made of a Kevlar fiber linen, it's also doubles as a gas mask which filtrates airborne toxins. The featureless lenses serve duel purposes of octagonal telescopic/microscopic visual receptor and analyzer coupled with infrared night vision locator.

Trench Coat: Cole's trademark long jacket comprises of the same artillery resistant material as his face mask. Serving him well both in a fashionable and practical sense, beyond it's natural application. It also withholds a great many pocket stores and holding straps with which to house and withhold a great many munitions on his person. Armaments such as explosive charges, throwing knives, stilettos, acupressure needles and small firearms.

VAD PP30: Grifter uses a VAD PP30, a semi-automatic particle pulse handgun custom made by Vulcan Arms Division for his use only. It fires 44mm explosive pulse packs, and by adjusting the Catalytic Particle Converter, Grifter can change the range of the firepower so it may be a simple stun, or an armor-piercing blast.

Little Magnum: Hidden micro blaster concealed within his glove, single shots pack enough kick behind the chamber to blast holes though an full grown humanoid target.

Various High-Tech Munitions: In his time as a special forces operative as well as one of Jacob Marlowe's covert operatives. Grifter has stocked up on and/or engineered a great many kinds of lethal ordinance for use while in the field. Often carrying around high-caliber fusil's, combustibles and hidden utilities which are a mix of Kherubim and Earth based xenotechnological engineering.

Origins

There are various accounts of Cole's early youth: his father died while he was still young and Cole and his brother Max were raised by their mother and stepfather, with his mother dying when Cole was already an adult. However, his mother died while he was still young and he and his brother were raised by their father. It is certain though, that Cole left his family while still a teenager and turned to crime to survive. Despite being a criminal, Cole had his own code of honor and stopped one of his partners in crime from shooting at the police. Cole was arrested and offered a second chance. He was enlisted by International Operations and turned out to be a gifted marksman and an excellent soldier.

Team-7

Cole Cash's natural talent for combat landed him in black ops, taking the dirtiest jobs as part of a squad known as Team 7. Cash's codename during these operations was Deadeye. The group was deliberately exposed to an experimental chemical called the Gen Factor, which activated a variety of psi powers in them, but which also detrimentally affected their sense of morality and mental health. After the experiment the survivors were classified as Gen 12. Some of their teammates went mad or committed suicide. Cole suspects that in fact their own superiors, I.O., were behind the experiment, while their superiors claimed that it was an unknown chemical weapon. One of the many missions Team 7 performed was destroying the dictatorship of a small African country. Andrew Johnson, one of the members, goes mad and glories in his ability to make people commit suicide. Disgusted, Cole kills Johnson. Cole grew more and more disgruntled with I.O.'s manipulations and secrecy and rebelled against team-leader John Lynch. Cash took charge and united the team's mental powers against a nuclear weapon that I.O. team-leader Miles Craven fired at Team 7 as a test. Team 7 went into hiding, but was eventually forced to return to I.O. 

Coda

When the powers of many of Team 7's members started to wane, Craven became interested in their children, the Gen 13, who should have inherited their fathers' powers. Most of the team went into hiding again, while others stayed with I.O. The team finally fell apart and Cole came to work as an assassin for I.O., but he soon became disenchanted with them too. He went freelance, and it was during this period of his life he encountered the ancient Kherubim warrior Zealot. They fell in love, and she took the unprecedented measure of teaching him, a male, the ways of the Coda, the warrior order she had once belonged to. Her Coda-teachings stabilized Cole's sanity and locked away what remained of his psionic powers.

WildC.A.T.s

Some time later Cole and Zealot broke up; for Zealot it was just another relationship, but Cole had become devoted to her, being eternally grateful to her for restoring his sanity. However they remained on good terms, and both were recruited to become part of Lord Emp's Daemonite hunting team, the WildC.A.T.s. Grifter would later quit the team when they had to ally with Hightower, a Daemonite who had killed Grifter's friend Lonely. He rejoined when the team came back from Khera, even being the team's leader for some time. During this time Max Cash, his younger brother, was killed, came back as a zombie and was killed again by Grifter himself. He left the team again after Zealot's apparent death. At this point most of his teammates left as well and the WildC.A.T.s were disbanded.

Wildcats

Months later, Cole joined the Wildcats, a small group that included Lord Emp, Spartan and the French weapons dealer known as Noir. After Emp's ascension, Grifter sank into a depression; he began drinking and having one-night stands with women who reminded him of Zealot. Finally Zealot herself returned, but at the time Grifter was too drunk to recognize her. After a night of sex, Zealot left him before Grifter realized who she was. He caught up with her again while she was fighting the Coda. Zealot told him that the Coda had betrayed her teachings and she had sworn to wipe them all out. She added that she would spare Grifter, despite being Coda-trained, because of their history. After this meeting, Grifter straightened out his life and joined Jack Marlowe's Halo Corporation.

During this time Cole was mind-controlled by the villain Tao into shooting his former teammate and current I.O. director, John Lynch, leaving him in a coma. Tao then erased Cole's memories of these events.

Halo Corporation

During a mission for Jack Marlowe, Cole's legs were shattered by Agent Orange. Therefore he could no longer operate as Marlowe's field agent. He trained accountant Edwin Dolby to take his place. Dolby turned out to be unsuitable for the violent life that Grifter planned for him and resigned from Halo. After Marlowe apologized to him, he rejoined, but strictly as an accountant. Grifter remodeled the robotic body of former teammate Ladytron as a remote-controlled body for himself.

Several months later, Grifter's legs were healed, a side-effect of the dormant Gen-factor according to I.O. scientists. John Lynch, who had woken from his coma, restored Cole's memory. Cole was sent to take down Tao and working together with double-agent Holden Carver, Tao's organization was completely dismantled and Tao was imprisoned.

Since then he has joined a make-shift team of former Wildcats to take down the assassin Nemesis.

Worldstorm

When Jack Marlowe died Cole has taken control of Halo Corporation and all its assets. Being depress of Spartan's death, Cole has been in South America fighting Daemonites for a month.

He later arrived back in New York just in time to witness Captain Atom's arrival and subsequent battle with Majestic. Cash recognized an energy signature in Captain Atom that he'd previously only seen in his deceased teammates Void and Spartan. After consulting with Jeremy Stone, Cole was acknowledged that the Void's energy splinted into both of Captain Atom and Nikola Hanssen.

Cole later regrouped the former Wildcats to capture Captain Atom while he face a fearful Nikola. Cole tried to convince Nikola to accept who she is as a metahuman as she, like any other normal people, was deeply afraid of metahumans. When Captain Atom defeated the Wildcats in Washington, D.C., both Cole and Nikola arrive at the scene in which Cole convinced Nikola to use the Void's power of teleportation. From there Cole was about to combat Atom but witness him being teleported away by the Authority via a shift-door.

While regrouped with the Wildcats, they were confronted by Mister Majestic who then gravelly informed them that killing Captain Atom would caused the destruction of their universe leaving Cole all the more frustrated of the situation and focus more on Nikola's power of the Void. Cole eventually helped Captain Atom in fending off the Authority from killing the misplaced hero, who they believe that killing Atom would save their universe, and was subsequently killed by Apollo and Midnighter: Midnighter buried two throwing stars in Cash's spine, then Apollo incinerated his head.

After Nikola harnessed her powers and remade the universe, Cole and along of many past deceased people such as Deathblow came back, but with no memories of the events with Nikola, Captain Atom, and the reboot of the universe.

Post-Worldstorm

In the wake of the reboot, Cole is shown to be a man who has attempted to change himself, but keeps getting sucked back in to the hero lifestyle. He appears to be an employee of Hadrian as a core member of the new WildCats team that he is assembling.

Cole Cash briefly worked as an assassin for the US government, targeting Islamist terror networks. His latest assignment went awry when his target turned out to be an alien shape-shifter who was being hunted by others of the same race. Zee, as he/she calls itself, has now drawn Grifter and Midnighter into an interstellar conflict involving weaponized giant worms.

World's End

Grifter returned to the Wildcats after Armageddon, helping survivors in Los Angeles. He was later summoned by John Lynch and regrouped with Team-7 where he and his teammates learned of Tao's nihilistic threat. After the Halo Building in Los Angeles was destroyed, Grifter had himself and the Wildcats teamed up with Team-7 in stopping Tao. Ultimately their battle ended with Grifter shooting Tao in the head at pointblank, thus relinquishing his powers from Void, Max Faraday, and Providence.

Grifter was among the many heroes that were notified of the Authority's Carrier's leaving, in which Grifter was among the few heroes to leave Earth when he was ordering the panic refugees who were boarding the shift-ship. Grifter and along with his old comrade Deathblow officially joined the "new" Authority and together helped in establishing order among the Carrier's influx of refugees. During the journey Cole entered into a sexual relationship with Stormwatch member, Flint.

Cole's journey with the Authority led them to discovering a genocidal alien race known as the Karibna and helped in destroying them, and thereafter returning to Earth.

Fun Facts

Grifter's real name, Cole Cash, bears resemblance to the phrase "Cold Hard Cash". Cash is associated with a 'grifter'-defined as a swindler, dishonest gambler, or the like.

Cole Cash has called Michael Cray his best friend.

Grifter admitted he was agnostic when he went back in time to Rome and was thrown with the Christians to be attacked by lions in the Coliseum.

Grifter's original mask is not only used to conceal his identity but also has the ability to filter out any noxious gases he may come in contact with.

#grifter #cole cash #deadeye #The Authority #wildc.a.t.s #wildcats #team-7 #team 7 #team7 #international operations #dc #dc comics #thedcdunce

[edc-creations-blog]

Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon

  *Named a Best Book of 2018 by the New York Times, Publishers Weekly, NPR, Broadly, Buzzfeed (Nonfiction), The Undefeated, Library Journal (Biography/Memoirs), The Washington Post (Nonfiction), Southern Living (Southern), Entertainment Weekly, and The New York Times Critics*

In this powerful, provocative, and universally lauded memoir—winner of the Andrew Carnegie Medal and finalist for the Kirkus Prize—genre-bending essayist and novelist Kiese Laymon “provocatively meditates on his trauma growing up as a black man, and in turn crafts an essential polemic against American moral rot” (Entertainment Weekly).

In Heavy, Laymon writes eloquently and honestly about growing up a hard-headed black son to a complicated and brilliant black mother in Jackson, Mississippi. From his early experiences of sexual violence, to his suspension from college, to time in New York as a college professor, Laymon charts his complex relationship with his mother, grandmother, anorexia, obesity, sex, writing, and ultimately gambling. Heavy is a “gorgeous, gutting…generous” (The New York Times) memoir that combines personal stories with piercing intellect to reflect both on the strife of American society and on Laymon’s experiences with abuse. By attempting to name secrets and lies he and his mother spent a lifetime avoiding, he asks us to confront the terrifying possibility that few in this nation actually know how to responsibly love, and even fewer want to live under the weight of actually becoming free.

“A book for people who appreciated Roxane Gay’s memoir Hunger” (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel), Heavy is defiant yet vulnerable, an insightful, often comical exploration of weight, identity, art, friendship, and family through years of haunting implosions and long reverberations. “You won’t be able to put [this memoir] down…It is packed with reminders of how black dreams get skewed and deferred, yet are also pregnant with the possibility that a kind of redemption may lie in intimate grappling with black realities” (The Atlantic).

Purchase Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon

https://www.amazon.com/Heavy-American-Memoir-Kiese-Laymon/dp/1501125664/

  Editorial Reviews for Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon

“Heavy is a gorgeous, gutting book that’s fueled by candor yet freighted with ambivalence. It’s full of devotion and betrayal, euphoria and anguish, tender embraces and rough abuse…the liberation on offer doesn’t feel light and unburdened; it feels heavy like the title, and heavy like the truth…Salvation would feel too weightless—as if [Laymon] could forget who he is and where he has been. This generous, searching book explores all the forces that can stop even the most buoyant hopes from ever leaving the ground.” —New York Times

“With echoes of Roxane Gay and John Edgar Wideman, Laymon defiantly exposes the ‘aches and changes’ of growing up black in this raw, cathartic memoir reckoning with his turbulent Mississippi childhood, adolescent obesity, and the white gaze.” —O Magazine

“[Heavy] take[s] on the important work of exposing the damage done to America, especially its black population, by the failure to confront the myths, half-truths, and lies at the foundation of the success stories that the nation worships. In the process, Laymon … dramatize[s] a very different route to victory: the quest to forge a self by speaking hard truths, resisting exploitation, and absorbing with grace the cost of being black in America while struggling to live a life of virtue…You won’t be able to put [this memoir] down, but not because [it is] breezy reading. [It is], in Laymon’s multilayered word, heavy—packed with reminders of how black dreams get skewed and deferred yet are also pregnant with the possibility that a kind of redemption may lie in intimate grappling with black realities.” —The Atlantic

“Heavy is one of the most important and intense books of the year because of the unyielding, profoundly original and utterly heartbreaking way it addresses and undermines expectations for what exactly it’s like to possess and make use of a male black body in America … the book thunders as an indictment of hope, a condemnation of anyone ever looking forward.” —LA Times

“Staggering … Laymon lays out his life with startling introspection. Heavy is comforting in its familiarity, yet exacting in its originality … Laymon subtitled his book, ‘An American Memoir,’ and that’s more than a grandiose proclamation. He is a son of this nation whose soil is stained with the blood and sweat of his ancestors. In a country both deserving of his love and hate, Laymon is distinctly American. Like the woman who raised him and the woman who raised her, he carries that weight, finding uplift from sorrow and shelter from the storms that batter black bodies.” —Boston Globe

“Heavy is a compelling record of American violence and family violence, and the wide, rutted embrace of family love … Kiese Laymon is a star in the American literary firmament, with a voice that is courageous, honest, loving, and singularly beautiful. Heavy is at once a paean to the Deep South, a condemnation of our fat-averse culture, and a brilliantly rendered memoir of growing up black, and bookish, and entangled in a family that is as challenging as it is grounding.” —NPR.org

“Weight is both unavoidably corporeal and a load-bearing metaphor in novelist-essayist Kiese Laymon’s sharp, (self-)lacerating memoir, addressed to the single teen mom turned professor who raised him to become exceptional…a deeply personal book, where race, class, and the scars of sexual violence are front and center.” —New York Magazine

“Laymon’s memoir is a reckoning, pulling from his own experience growing up poor and black in Jackson, Mississippi, and tracking the most influential relationships, for better or worse, of his life: with his brilliant but struggling single mother, his loving grandma, his body and the ways he nurtures and punishes it, his education and creativity, and the white privilege that drives the world around him…with shrewd analysis, sharp wit, and great vulnerability — Laymon forces the reader to fully consider the effects of the nation’s inability to reconcile its pride and ambition with its shameful history.” —Buzzfeed

“Laymon examines his relationship with his mother growing up as a black man in the South, exploring how racial violence suffered by both impacts his physical and emotional selves.” —Time

“Laymon provocatively meditates on his trauma growing up as a black man, and in turn crafts an essential polemic against American moral rot.” —Entertainment Weekly

“Kiese Laymon is one of the most dazzling, inventive, affecting essayists working today, and his memoir lives up to the dizzyingly high expectations set for it. In Heavy, Laymon explores his tumultuous relationship with his brilliant mother, what it meant to grow up as a fiercely smart, rebellious black man in Mississippi, and his trouble with addiction in various forms. Laymon is fearless in his willingness to go to the darkest, the most tender, the most raw spaces of his life, and of our shared lives in the fragile experiment that is America. His writing will shock and comfort you, make you realize you are not alone, and stun you with its insights about desire, need, and love.” —Nylon.com

“Stylish and complex … Laymon convincingly conveys that difficult times can be overcome with humor and self-love, as he makes readers confront their own fears and insecurities.” —Publishers Weekly, starred

“A challenging memoir about black-white relations, income inequality, mother-son dynamics, Mississippi byways, lack of personal self-control, education from kindergarten through graduate school, and so much more. Laymon skillfully couches his provocative subject matter in language that is pyrotechnic and unmistakably his own … Far more than just the physical aspect, the weight he carries also derives from the burdens placed on him by a racist society, by his mother and his loving grandmother, and even by himself. At times, the author examines his complicated romantic and sexual relationships, and he also delves insightfully into politics, literature, feminism, and injustice, among other topics. A dynamic memoir that is unsettling in all the best ways.” —Kirkus Reviews, starred

“Spectacular … So artfully crafted, miraculously personal, and continuously disarming, this is, at its essence, powerful writing about the power of writing.” —Booklist, starred

“What I have always loved about Kiese Laymon is that he is as beautiful a person as he is a writer. What he manages to do in the space of a sentence is unparalleled, and that’s because no one else practices the art of revision as an act of love quite like Kiese. He loves his mother, his grandmama, Mississippi, black folks, his students, his peers, and anyone else willing to embrace his love enough to give us this gorgeous memoir, Heavy. This reckoning with trauma, terror, fear, sexual violence, abuse, addiction, family, secrets, lies, truth, and the weight of the nation and his body would be affecting in less capable hands, but with Kiese at the helm it is nothing short of a modern classic. These sentences that he so painstakingly crafted are some the most arresting ever printed in the English language. Kiese’s heart and humor shine through, and we are blessed to have such raw humanity rendered in prose that begs for repeat readings. We do not deserve Heavy. We do not deserve Kiese. That he is generous enough to share is testament to his commitment to helping us all heal. –Mychal Denzel Smith, author of Invisible Man, Got the Whole World Watching

“There are those rare writers in the world whose work unearths the stories that have been buried in and around us for so long. They force us to confront all that we would be rather not see, and ask us to reckon with why we have failed to see it for so long. Kiese Laymon is one such rare writer. Heavy is a memoir, yes, but it is also a testament to a sort of truth and self-reflection that is increasingly rare in our world today. If for some reason you were not already convinced, there should no longer be any doubt that Kiese Laymon is one of the important writers of our time.” –Clint Smith, author of Counting Descent

“At once tender and explosive, Kiese Laymon’s Heavy is a growing-up story laden with an unusual candor. The book is stark, beautiful, challenging, and refreshing. Laymon explores abuse, love, violence, addiction, gender, and race without ever veering into the realm of the titillating or dehumanizing. He carries his people with a sweetness and fullness of heart that allows them to shine in three dimensions, allowed to be ugly and complicated and beloved and human. The abundance of Heavy is going to be a gift for many hurting hearts, in our time and beyond.” –Eve Ewing, author of Electric Arches

“With Heavy, Laymon has outlined the wretched shape of our relentless national lie with duty and precision, breathing and pouring into it to shine the light ever brighter on its contours and limits. Heavy is an intimate excavation, a diagnosis, and a prescription for a cure for the terrifying dishonesty of the American body politic. I did not want to remember what I have found necessary to forget. Ready or not, Heavy remembers for me, and for us all, with the exquisite black southern precision of a post-soul blues. Its brilliance is in its intimate and firm reminder that we are more than what has been done to us by others and by this nation, and that we can and must unburden ourselves as we move towards freedom. With Heavy, Laymon, the chief blues scribe of our time, writes and plays us a path through the weight of things.” –Zandria Robinson, author of This Ain’t Chicago

“Kiese Laymon’s new book is an emotional powerhouse. He fearlessly takes the reader into the dark corners of his interior life. Wound, grief, and enduring pain reside there. But this book is a love letter. And, as we all know, love is a beautiful and funky experience. Thank you, Kiese, for this gift.” –Eddie Glaude, author of Democracy in Black

“Kiese Laymon has done nothing less than write the autobiography of the first generation of African-Americans born after the Civil Rights movements of the 1960s and the Black Power ethos of the 1970s. His story of grappling with love and violence and language and our bodies is this generation’s story, and it is as moving and heartbreaking and heartwarming as you would expect. And then some.” –Courtney Baker, author of Humane Insight

“Heavy is an act of truth telling unlike any other I can think of in American literature, partly due to Laymon’s uniquely gifted mind—his ability to pursue the ways we lie to each other while also loving each other, or, not, and the humility he brings to bear while doing so, this consistently brings us back to life, to what matters in this world. Heavy is a gift to us, if we can pick it up—a moral exercise and an intimate history that is at the same time a story about America.” —Alexander Chee, author of How to Write an Autobiographical Novel

“On the low, many in these United States of America imagine that to be black means that whiteness, whether in its feigned supremacy or brutal imaginings, should be the center of every black story. But nah, that’s meager. In Heavy, the Kiese Laymon remembers how people who loved each other or might of loved each other, nearly shattered everything around them with hurt and then struggled to piece it all back together. Kiese crafts the most honest and intimate account of growing up black and southern since Richard Wright’s Black Boy. Circumventing the myths about blackness, he writes something as complex and fragile as who we is. An insider’s look into the making of a writer, Heavy is part memoir and part look into the books that turned a kid into a story teller. Heavy invites us into a black South that remembers that we loved each other through it all. In “Nikki-Rosa,” Nikki Giovanni wrote that ‘black love is black wealth.’ This book is the weight of black love, and might we all be wealthy by daring to open up to it.” —Reginald Dwayne Betts, author of A Question of Freedom

“Heavy heaves, sings, hums, and runs all night to make it clear that there’s an alternative, that Black history’s first premise is mutuality. That mutuality isn’t perfect, ain’t safe, it’s dangerous, in fact, and Heavy moves in a terrible and beautiful and so gentle proximity to that—at crucial times our primary—danger, the ones we love and who love us the most. I was with Kiese the whole damn heavy-floating way, word for word in laughter and tears, in recognition, refraction and revelation. But, way more than any of those, sentence by sentence, I was with Kiese in thanks.” —Ed Pavlic, author of Another Kind of Madness

“In Heavy, Kiese Laymon asks how to survive in a body despite the many violences that are inflicted upon it: the violence of racism, of misogyny, of history — the violence of a culture that treats the bodies of black men with fear and suspicion more often than with tenderness and attentive care. In prose that sears at the same time as it soars, Kiese Laymon breaks the unbearable silence each of these violences, in their peculiar cruelty, has imposed. Permeated with humility, bravery, and a bold intersectional feminism, Heavy is a triumph. I stand in solidarity with this book, and with its writer.” –Lacy M. Johnson, author of The Other Side and The Reckonings

“How appropriate Kiese Laymon’s stunning memoir is titled, Heavy. Not only are the stains and hurt highlighted here, heavy, but also the writer’s capacity to revive graveyards of ghosts who haunt and seemingly will continue to haunt the protagonist. Laymon is a fearless writer, our writer, who’s willing to expose and explore his most vulnerable interiors so that we might get closer to our truths. This is a southern book for backroads and cornbread, for Cadillacs and collard greens, for big mamas and moonshine. Heavy is full of our beautiful and ugly histories, and a declaration of how we might seek redemption. The colorful and complicated characters here speak a blues and poetry that is both nostalgic and familiar. This is the book we need right now. We should all be thankful for this ultramodern weighty testament of heartache, catharsis, and utter brilliance.” —Derrick Harriell, author of Stripper in Wonderland and Ropes

“You do not just read Kiese Laymon’s work. It does a reading of you too—one that unburies the stories you thought you would never be able to tell truthfully, and reminds you of your voice to tell them. Heavy marks this quality in its highest definition yet. Written with as much devastating poignance as a humor only the Black South could inspire, Heavy asks readers not just to observe Laymon’s courageous journey to understand even the most frightening complexities of life in an anti-Black, sexist, fatphobic society, but to embark on it with him. In doing so, Laymon’s gorgeous wordsmithing moves us beyond simple binaries of pleasure and pain, joy and trauma, toward a deeper love for communities too often flattened into one dimension. Heavy is a book for the ages.” —Hari Ziyad, author of Black Boy Out of Time

“Heavy is beautiful, lyrical, painful, and really brave. It is both exigent and timeless. Laymon’s use of juxtaposition—of the political and personal, the many stories of dishonesty and history, violence, everything—is all-world.” —Nafissa Thompson-Spires, author of Heads of the Colored People

  Purchase Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon https://www.amazon.com/Heavy-American-Memoir-Kiese-Laymon-ebook/dp/B01CO349N4

        Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon *Named a Best Book of 2018 by the New York Times, Publishers Weekly, NPR, Broadly, Buzzfeed (Nonfiction), The Undefeated, Library Journal (Biography/Memoirs), The Washington Post (Nonfiction), Southern Living (Southern), Entertainment Weekly, and The New York Times Critics*

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The Helen Keller Guide To Contentment

You are actually on a proven monitor for much better wellness and joy if you may handle the duties from having a household pet. For additional friendship quotes, look at the well-liked companionship quotations segment of, a site that concentrates on 'Leading 10' lists of quotations in dozens from classifications. A survey accomplished through Gardeners Planet Publication reported that 80% of those which gardened experienced delighted and also delighted along with their lives compared with 67% of those who carried out not garden. Publications with twists, pleased closings, disasters as well as at times without any ending whatsoever. You're the main reason I haven't lost my thoughts currently, you create me happy and you were CONSTANTLY there for me by far. Males are actually really obstinate and also have large prides, so that is hard for them to make it possible for any individual to make them carry out something. Advertising is necessary, yet the absolute most important is the gigs you do, due to the fact that there is actually constantly an individual in the target market who is setting up an event in the near future as well as need a really good performer. What Creates Me Satisfied has a layout that is actually especially productive in constructing empathy along with groups from children which are strongly politicised or even considered a danger. In case you cherished this information and you desire to acquire more information with regards to yellow pages advertising (my latest blog post) generously go to the site. On now i am actually quite pleased to tell the globe that Micheal is actually back to me thanks to Dr.Zabaza that make use of is great powers to cast an incantation that delivered micheal back to me within 48hours. Definitely, for that reason outside things and people are certainly not heading to make us delighted in the longterm, as they frequently must be switched out along with something else. Some guys persist animals often, as well as no male, one or female, suches as being forced making improvements. You can create straightforward, but classy centerpieces through simply organizing together several tiny framed photos. Regardless of the condition or even instances, our experts get to pick whether our company want to feel happy and vitalized, or even fatigued as well as unhappy. I make it a suggest see an episode or 2 throughout the full week to provide me a good laugh. A number of research studies have found then devoted with family and friends makes a big distinction to just how delighted we experience, generally. Integrate that feeling with an enthused love for pups, as well as you receive Skou's business: Pups Create Me Happy-- which right now brings in $40,000 per month. And also, with a couple of recommendations, you can possibly know effective ways to approach him so that he not merely pays attention, but he has some action making sure that you are better within your marriage. You do not have to strain to locate best wording tips for that special individual's birthday party. Some people mention today I could not enjoy due to the fact that I am actually sick, because I carry out certainly not possess funds, due to the fact that the weather is also hot, since I was actually ridiculed through an individual, considering that I carried out certainly not value myself, because my kids do certainly not listen closely to me, due to the fact that my pals perform not make me happy. When he obtained right into one from his sulky moods, Andrew was constantly thus delighted that this thought particularly disconcerting. And if you intend to make your male happy in the actual sense, at that point you will certainly have to ensure changes in you. Caution ought to be actually had, having said that, when trying to combat a curse, as unskilled wheels might really magnify this as well as create it much worse. People throw colours on each other and also dream Satisfied Holi." People additionally create special foods at their home as well as eat along with their good friends. I was actually gotten married to for 15years along with lilian as well as 2kids as well as our company resided merrily up until factors started obtaining awful and also we possessed disagreements and battles almost whenever ... that got worse at a factor that she declared divorce ... I attempted my finest to create her modification her mind & stick with me lead to i liked her along with all my heart and really did not would like to loose her however everything only didn't work out ... she vacated our home as well as still went on to apply for breakup ... I tried as well as begged every thing yet still absolutely nothing worked. For example, if you are actually expecting a partner to follow right into your life to be happy after that you are actually probably paid attention to what the sensation will definitely feel like when you meet your soul mate as well as exactly how your life will certainly be various after that it is right currently. This could appear a little odd, yet deal with this momentarily ... you prefer more amount of money considering that you feel that will certainly create you happy. Aries is actually incredibly serving when in a connection, if you may think of something he has actually refrained from doing that you believe he might enjoy you need to bring this up. The important things is that the Aries man will certainly enjoy himself most when you enjoy and since he is actually certainly not unsure regarding having possibilities, he will certainly make an effort everything the moment. Picture a child that is merely pleased to be (when they are certainly not crying, that is actually!) Attempt shifting your emphasis to being, as well as think about an individual or even one thing that you like. I don't mind when our talks receive a little mundane & our company lack things to mention, only possessing you suffices to create me satisfied. For more l ove quotes, look into the well-liked, a site that specializes in 'Leading 10' listings from estimates in dozens from groups. That is actually when an individual carries out something pleasant for someone else, and also person, in turn, does one thing good for the next individual, then that individual performs something pleasant for an the following individual and so forth. That is actually how our company affect as well as make the realm around our team a much better area. They will create our team pleased for a quick or not therefore brief amount of time, however in the long run you will certainly return to your initial condition. Nevertheless, an intervening nap obstructed as well as reversed this damaging psychological reactivity to anger and also fear while alternatively enriching ratings from favorable (delighted) articulations. If you like a certain unusual food items, state this as well as if this is actually possible he will definitely make reservations at a restaurant that serves it even when he certainly never attempted that previously. May create every comic book fans fantasize a reality with a reported launch from the Compensation Game in 2015. Not that I despise just how I look-- that's even more merely that I must make some way of living improvements. Spanish places like Majorca support special appeal to holidaymakers outward Europe. Currently unless you really want the partnerships to finish, you have to carry out one thing making amends for your actions that distress your pal (or man or even sweetheart). I decided to check out traits that create me delighted, and after that hunted for ways to create cash by doing all of them. I hope you discovered something useful within this quick write-up as well as want you all the best and delighted functionalities. Do something brand new every now and then making every meet remarkable and interesting. It is actually certainly not constantly as simple as knowing exactly what you adore, then determining ways to make cash performing that. You can easily make a good living through starting a cars and truck cleaning business if you enjoy to wash vehicles. The amount of times performed you long for something as well as you felt in one's bones that when you will get that one thing you are going to truly be happy.