#cause that shits been fucked for ages

[radlegowaffle]

love bluh bluh bluh

#初音ミク #ラビットホール #rabbit hole #hatsune miku #vocaloid #illustration #artists on tumblr #dooblenauts #i liked how this looked better while i was working on it #now it looks. so bad #the handcuffs look stupid. the background is stupid. the shading and rendering is stupid #why am i so afraid of trying new things my rendering now sucks idk what im doing its so unpleasing to look at #eugh. eugh #trying to get my shit together by trying to get a better sleep schedule. as a first step #cause that shits been fucked for ages #i slept at midnight and woke up at 6am and stayed up ALL day. i was SO proud of myself #then when i went to sleep at 8 or 9 last night i stupidly took a lil bit of a gummy to pass me out easier #it was apparently too much and i woke up at midnight freaking out #now im pissed off at myself for waking up at 10am cause of a fuck up i should have avoided but i wanted to go to sleep quicker #why do i suck. why do i suck!!!!!!!!!!! #anyway gonna burn myself out on drawing cause im useless and cant do anything else otherwise #hoping someone will be like 'hey nice art! heres some money draw me a thing' #but thats probably not gonna happen in a VERY long time #so im probably just gonna be useless for the rest of my life #dont take this as me trying to gain pity or anything im going through a mood and just really pissed off at myself 😭

[designernishiki]

ladies and gentlemen. we got em

#this is so fucking FUNNY dude banxbsnanxb #STRAIGHT PEOPLE ON REDDIT ARE SO MAD AND IM JUST SITTING HERE. GRINNING. PLEASED #that’s 700x more in character than the alternative and I’m just praying this is true/legit (cause I couldn’t find the exact interview this #is from- but I didn’t see anyone saying it was fake on Twitter/Reddit so idk) #to be fair I could only scroll through comments on reddit for like a minute before it started giving me brain damage so #but yeah bdbxsbscshxjdj YOKOYAMA. MAYBE IVE BEEN GIVING YOU TOO LITTLE CREDIT. #I absolutely love seeing all these basic ass straight folks getting so pissy about him not settling down with a nuclear biological family #and a wife and all that and dying at the ripe old age of his fucking mid-50s #like no shit???? what games have you been playing bro the whole fucking Point of his idea of family is unconventional #he’s literally a fucking orphan who didn’t grow up with any biological family are you fucking fr #dgagdhdhd ANYWAY yeah I’m seriously hoping to high heaven that this is legit #rambling #kiryu #yakuza #rgg #rgg8

[redjukebox]

Me @ my brain: cmon man we gootta focus on this school shit and we gotta do all these things to ensure we’re good for the next quarter and we literally cannot be late or we’re so screwed and we reeeaally have to make an appointment like we’ve had to for the past 3 months pleeeaasee

My brain: ok but like what if Tick Tock constantly feels the need to move around, whether it’s moving his ears, tail, tapping his hoof, or even just talking to make sure that he still can?? Like bro was paralyzed and literally could not move AT ALL for at LEAST a year (at the very VERY least) like that must’ve done SOOOO MUCH DAMAGE OH MY GOD HE LITERALLY COULD NOOOT MOOVE BRO HE WAS 12

#doctor whooves and assistant #tick tock #I have a lot of things I have to get done but my mind will always return to Tick Tock #no matter how long I go without consuming dwna content it always comes back #I consider that a blessing<3 #seriously tho I feel like him literally being paralyzed at age 12 is kinda brushed over sometimes #like yeah he brings it up because it still heavily affects him but like #that must’ve been terrifying #he was literally at the mercy of a town that wanted him fucking dead #at age 12 #obviously he was taken care of because he definitely wouldn’t have made it without help but still #he was probably beyond terrified #like brroooo #sometimes I think about it and goooodddddd #I might try writing more fics just so I can have him process this shit cause there’s no way he’s processed it all #I NEED derpy and doctor helping him get through this trauma that has been with him for likely a whole DECADE #idk how old that mf is but he’s definitely early twenties so it probably has been a decade💀 #I also think him constantly talking to himself good be him continuing an old habit of making sure he could talk #idk how to phrase it but I’m sure it’s basically understandable #hopefully💀 #sorry about this huge rant #haven’t ranted about Tick Tock in a looong time #need to do it every now and then #it’s my enrichment<3 #I just realized my tags are longer than my FUCKING POST LMAOOOOOO

[cloverhighfive]

wait - If they say ADHD is prevalent in males (the male ADHD of course), and males never listen to women because of ADHD but they've also been raised to be right all the time, that explains their putting all the fault on women for "nagging".

You know, Nagging (noun) - what men call "being reminded of the thing they keep forgetting cause they don't fucking listen or fucking pay attention but will under no circumstance take any responsibility for it".

#clover talks #I feel like I should have understood this ages ago #but dad did something this weekend #or rather didn't do #and although we're all ADHD mom included #only dad does that type of shit where he fucks up cause he doesn't pay attention to something that's been happening for hours #which he even was part of #ADHD

[thedreadvampy]

wait no sorry one last quick immature bitch moment

the more I find out about how this person has behaved in both this relationship and a bunch of other relationships, the funnier it is how much they like to set themselves up as a like. authority on ethical nonmonogamy and consent and conflict management.

when like. they constantly sexually assault people to prove a point, pressure their partners into shit, got into enm by cheating on 3 people concurrently, and literally every time a problem in their orbit is brought up it gets explained away without anything actually changing, or they cry about how hard it is until everyone says OH NO IT'S FINE DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT

you know. very "call yourself a Community Organizer even though you're not on speaking terms with your roommates" energies.

#red said #I'm mad tbh i know in being bitchy but this blog is my safe space to be bitch on #and this shit has been building up for years. not even just in my relationship with their partner. since the first time i meet them #in like 2018 #and having this chat with my pal last night now I'm no longer second guessing myself bc of my relationship has uhhh Crystalised Some Things #especially getting some new context on where a lot of the tensions and sensitivities I've been aware of for ages are from #also tbh when we broke up my ex led off with 'i know you think this is about [partner] but it's not' and i was like. it is though. #it's not the only thing but it's been a common thread through every piece of tension in that relationship #not saying if the partner wasn't there we'd have been together forever. i don't think that's true and I'm glad things went the way they did. #cause w were good for each other and breaking up was also good for us #but their partner has really caused me so so so so so much turmoil for years and i haven't felt able to acknowledge that cause it makes me #feel like an asshole. but like. OK SO I'M AN ASSHOLE. I'M FUCKING MAD AT THEM. #they are manipulative and controlling and they treat their partner like shit and they have perpetually made my life worse #i like a lot of things about them and i do feel for them. we share a lot of similar issues and i do understand how they feel a lot. #but fuck me they treat everyone around them so badly and a good chunk of the reason i ended things with their partner #is that i was so fucking sick of being told i was wrong and just didn't understand how hard they had it whenever i brought up #one of the many many many shitty things they did to me or to our partner or to our friends. #multiple times i left a situation in a fully fucked up mess and my partner came to apologise for how their partner has behaved #and within minutes it would turn into them explaining to me how it wasn't really their fault and i shouldn't be so hard on them #and like fuck that. had enough of that in my life with my previous ex. #anyway. yeah. i am probably being more didactic and aggro here than i genuinely feel. but there's some room for that anger i think #and i did get some room for it to breathe last night and that's good and helpful.

[awkward-teabag]

Can't even mention that a store near me is clearly using abusing the TFW program because they refuse to pay little more than minimum wage in a high cost of living area (also you won't get benefits and you'll only be part-time) because the fascists and right-wingers will jump in to say it's about immigration and white replacement.

No, it's because rich white people want to hoard even more money and found an intentional loophole to both make more money (via paying employees less) and also have more power over employees, employees who may or may not know Canadian employment laws (or safety laws) and even if they do, don't have the ability or support to try to hold the company accountable.

You can absolutely criticize the federal government for keeping the loophole open but it predates Trudeau by decades and it was Harper who both expanded the program and added a way for companies to fast-track TFWs. It was also under Harper that companies started firing Canadians (or not hiring them) and then requesting permission to mass-hire TFWs instead.

But the way the right wing talks, you would think Trudeau started this whole thing and the poor multi-million and multi-billion dollar companies are being taken advantage of. Also that housing prices, lack of new developments, and zoning issues started with Trudeau and are the fault of mass-immigration he has a boner for instead of being an issue for decades and experts warning this would happen if governments didn't act ASAP.

Instead the neolibs and cons kept cutting back and kicking that can down the road, a can that started being kicked by Mulroney and the Conservative Party.

#as a 90s kid i grew up with warnings about healthcare and housing and how we needed mass immigration or a massive baby boom #because of the utter lack of federal support and an aging workforce #the systems were already being strained to their limits and there literally weren't enough millennials to replace retiring workers #*or* bring in enough taxes to fund said systems when the system needed it the most #not even increase funding just keeping the same funding that was already not enough #also the right conveniently ignores (or doesn't know about) the extremely predatory recruitment industry #that targets people overseas while lying and charging large amounts of money to bring tfws to canada #you could even blame chretien for expanding it to include 'low-skilled' workers which is what companies are abusing it for #hell even trudeau sr for creating it in the first place even though it was originally made for high-skilled or niche jobs #but no the blame is always trudeau jr with a ton of racism and brownnosing capitalists #because all these problems sprang up suddenly under him #and in no way did harper start/expand/not end/be complicit in any of this /s #though i guess for some of the fascists it seems that way 'cause they weren't personally affected by it until now #and companies have stopped trying to pretend they aren't grabbing as much money as possible because fuck anyone else #even though it's been like that for decades and capitalism itself encourages companies to skim money off the top #while not having the checks and balances to limit just how much #for that you need governments to regulate things and that doesn't work when you have leaders who are anti-regulation #and who believe in trickle down economics #just... the whole thing is not happening in a bubble and involves multiple people and both the neolibs and cons #because it's been building for decades #but you can't bloody say that because the moment you mention housing/jobs/healthcare and/or tfws #you get inundated by fascists who think you're one of them and hit you with some of the most unhinged shit #or who don't even care about you and just want someone to rant at about how it's the evil left's fault for everything #hell you can't even say you don't like trudeau because same thing: fascists think you're one of them or someone to bring into the cult

[aroacedavestrider]

Trans women talking about misogyny doesn’t mean they hate trans men, cry harder to ur terf friends

good job dipshit youve successfully demonstrated to the class what the strawman fallacy is. how is it that youre able to recognize that trans women talking about transmisogyny isnt an attack on trans men but not vice versa

you really gotta be plugging your ears and ignoring the shit out of trans men if you think that anybody with a brain is arguing what youre accusing us of lmao. which lemme check my Transandromisia List, oh shit

talking over us, erasure of our experiences, purposeful misconstruing to make us out as the Bad Guys (thats you!)

calling us terfs and grouping us in with actual dangerous oppressors (also you!)

othering us in some us vs. them type bullshit (you did that!)

dogg i dunno how to tell you this but youre an s-tier example of why trans men are fed up to the point where theres a brand sparkly new movement that pisses you off. maybe youre pressed cause were trying to dismantle the oppression olympics and you think youre winning. too bad sunshine, nobodys a fucking winner when it comes to any flavor of transphobia. pull your head out of your terminally online ass and go interact with somebody. go think about why trans men discussing their struggles is such a fucking issue for you

#and while youre at it shut the fuck up #you probably would have been an aspec exclusionist in 2018 lmao #or someone who insisted that bi people have no place in the lg*b*t+ community cause they can pass as straight and have straight privilege #ill give you a hint. bi people are not straight and will never have straight privilege #just like how trans men will never be cis and we will never benefit from that privilege #youre a class a discourse slurping shit stirrer and nobody irl and / or over the age of 25 will ever take you seriously #additionally wow thats crazy if im a terf. i didnt know terfs cared so much about trans men (sarcasm.) #wow i had no idea we were on the same side and we all respected each others identities (they want us dead.) #thats nuts that terfs are advocating for trans men (they call us traitors.) #clearly the terfses and the transmascses are best friends and are conspiring against the transfemses (they want to eliminate *all* of us.) #youre a fucking idiot. dont even stay mad. just shut up #delete later #transphobia #transandromisia #transandrophobia

[robotpussy]

when you express your feelings to one of your parents and they take it as a personal attack..................

#like no because i was telling my mum for years that i cant just have a film degree and then walk into the industry #i kept telling her i have to make my own stuff to build up my portfolio cause the reality is they don't give af abt degrees #they just want to know if u can do what u say u can and she would constantly discourage me from making my own stuff #and now she wants to call me to say that shes encouraging me to pursue my dreams like... this always fucking happens #i will say i need to do something and she will disregard it or or shut it down and then years down the line she will tell me #to do what i was suggesting years before that... and when i tell her i said this years before she gets upset and starts yelling #when i told her shes been constantly discouraged me from making my own stuff for 3 years she started telling me its not true #because she helped me apply to a bunch of film residentials etc when that's not what im saying???? im saying when i #told her i wanted to work on personal projects. just because im excited she would shut it down immediately im not talking abt #you helping me find out about the bfi film academy??? but now she wants to push me to do it.... telling me about it like I've never #spoken to her about this before. she still has the mentality of no matter what age you are everything you say shouldn't be taken into #account because im older than you and i automatically know whats best. this happens all the time #all i can say is she actually apologised because in the past she used to never say sorry. i would just tell her im sorry and we'll leave #ot at that but atleast she said sorry. even tho she kept saying 'im sorry if u felt i discouraged you' like she still doesn't believe #what im saying. unsolicited advice but the advice is just shit i said to her years before..... its so infuriating #its why i rarely ever talk to her

[rosicheeks]

I would KILL for some koolaid or like those “handmade” “juice” that you would make when you were little. Grab one of those weird ass pitchers and throw all the shit in there, stir it and drink. Yummy yum yum

#lmaooooooo #I was at the grocery store yesterday and walked past one of those pictures I haven’t seen in fucking ages! #it was for like fruit or some shit #which I haven’t tried but MAN I want to now! #I used to have a water bottle that had like a fruit pouch that I would put lemons or fruit in it #I miss that so damn much #been trying to find one of those water bottles but haven’t been able to #anywayyyyy #haven’t done a HUGE drink like that before though #but the pitcher just reminds me of koolaid days #and not necessarily just koolaid #idk what else we would make in there #but it would be like a sort of juice #can’t really call is handmade or juice cause i swear it was usually just a pouch and a bunch of sugar lol #but man oh man #good ol days #shut up rosie #rosie speaks

[thebleedingeffect]

.

#okay I'm talking in the tags of this post cause shit is happening in my life and I gotta talk about it somewhere #one part of it is my step brother crashing and burning before my very eyes and there's nothing I can do to stop his own destructive actions #so it's just me watching this poor kid ruin his relationships and blame everything and everyone around him as he does so #despite the fact that he's undeniably been treated horribly at times- he's just turned that anger back onto others and himself #and I have no idea what to feel as I watch him get arrested. have drug problems. because I'm just waiting for the inevitable spiral #it doesn't help that my mom has been comparing us and saying that I'm the much better child and she wishes he was like me #not understanding that I could’ve been him if I was just more angry at the world at that age instead of being so sad and scared #and that leads me to my fucking mom cause like- I love her. we've been through alot of bad shit with her #I've almost done some really bad shit for her and I know that she loves me more than anything else #but it feels like its been getting more and more suffocating cause I'm not sure she's able to start seeing me as an adult #and start loosening her grip around me and let me breathe. to have my own experiences without her by my side #to be able to go places and imagine a future without her constantly by my side #she talks and it's like she doesn't even think to wonder that perhaps I want to form my own experiences #and experience the world on my own terms because I feel like I've spent my whole life having so little damn control #religious family. shit and neglectful father who turned into the exact opposite and nearly killed me. family who refuses to listen and talk #having to move and run immediately. put survival above all else. go to school. get out. and god I just wanna breathe #she loves me so much and I love her too. but I feel like I'll be sooner crushed if I stick here for long enough #I'm just mad that my life has been nothing but absolutely no love. sudden waves of intense love. absolutely nothing. sudden spike #and I feel like I'm just finally starting to form good. healthy relationships on my own terms and actually make friends #because I had no idea what I was doing when I was a kid cause I was so fucking lonely and hurting #now I just. gotta figure out how to tell my mom that I can't carry this expectation that I'll continue to stay forever by her side #it just feels like I'm her child first and a person second. and it sucks. it really sucks. #ough. spins and spins and spins and spins-

[istherewifiinhell]

and ONE last slightly. annoyed griping. post at other ppls jokes of the show. THE REASON. im so. dont call a character A Dad when they're just. A Safe Adult. Thats not the same thing. ppl call the spider, dad to the trans bird... NO??? definetely not? do u call that random non binary human a parental figure to them?? Or do u understand that people owe each other things regardless of relation. and IN FACT. WANT. AND ENJOY. doing so. specially when ppl have a shared identity and it seems you could help them. and u can be nice to kids WHO ARENT RELATED TO U. OR WHO U WANT TO LIKE. capital C Care for. or Be Responsible for. u know???

#some shit #its not called cisformers #ITS. sry for being like an unsocial neurotic n still being like this BUT u know. I CAN believe things that i dont personally DO very well. #LIKE ITS GOOD TO TEACH THE KIDS THAT. that if they can find safe adults. u know. they can get help. THATS A VERY GOOD NORMAL THING. #u dont even have to be full. abolish the family to get behind that #and u know. personally. last time i WERENT. so unsocial. hermit. i DID know some queer kiddos. so im AM also fond on that angle. #DOES IN FACT. make the world seem brighter. im not like. Take Care of Kids material. BUT I CAN BE A NICE QUEER SERVICE WORKER. TO EM. #trans bird saga #<- going in there cause its the thematic thought of my day. #ALSO THAT I 'AVE BEEN. they theming SINCE kiddo age myself. so i just up in my feelings from all the fucking angles. if im fucking honest.

[s0fter-sin]

god gives his biggest bleached buzzcut dreams to his most sensitive scalped soldiers

#i literally have such a bad scalp #its always dry and itchy and sore #like that shit is medicated #but i still want to bleach it! #even though the last time i did i got actual chemical burns! with scabs! #but my sisters engagement party is next week and ill be damned if i go to it with brown bullshit hair #i had an ultrasound yesterday and bought some shit from bigw so i was out for ages and while i dont feel as bad as i expected #i do get significantly worse every time i move #so of course i should bleach my hair which causes pain and a major adrenaline dump! #i want time to make sure its light enough and even so fuck it today it is #coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt

[teabookgremlin]

I WANNA BE HAPPT IM READY TO WALK INTO MY ROOM WITHOUT LOOKING FOR YOU GO IP TO THE TOP OF MY BUILDINF AND REMEMBER MY DOG WHEN I SEE THE FULL MOON

#really sad tonight #i miss justice and iris and king #something is hitting me really hard about not having a dog rn #i think it’s that this weekend we’re visiting our parent org and the last i was there was to drop off king #and also im planning on starting to clear his stuff out of my room #i haven’t been able to bring myself to do it yet #and i know all three of my pups are doing awesome #but one of them any of them should still me with me rn #also i’m stressed that the president of the puppy raising club will fuck me over for getting an 8 week old this summer #bc i’m living in a student apartment so dog stuff goes through the student accessibility services #and we’re not sure if they will ok an 8 week old but i don’t think they actually need to know the age of the dog #so we can simply not tell them that it’s a baby bc i doubt it’ll cause any big issues #and i have to pay a pet fee anyway for my apartment so like #but i’m concerned her rule following will somehow fuck it over for me #even tho she’s graduating before i’d even be getting the dog #and if she fucks it over and i have to wait even longer for a dog i’m gonna end up in a shit place mentally #bc rn im just taking time to recover from the hard time i’ve hard raising so far #but by this summer i think i’ll be ready and start hitting a point where not having a dog will be worse mentally than having one #anyway rant over #but yeah this bit of the song is hitting #bc yeah i walk into my room and see the dog kennel #and king should be in it #but he’s not bc he flunked out #and i just am constantly thinking about him or justice or iris #i just feel like shit rn #i also ate too many cadbury mini eggs so my stomach hurts #i think i’m mostly past the point of blaming myself for my dogs’ issues tho so #that’s progress

[xanderscollection]

Crying over my phone as I attempt to draw hands but every attempt they get worse and become worms

#yes i draw on my phone yes i also know its hard as shit #getting a head start on the upcoming event cause i take ages when i wanna do fully rendered pieces and i forget how to draw shiemi #fuck flipping canvas if you ever flip my art im going to jail for assault/j #i miss drawing on a big screen #drawing with my fingers makes my hands ache #theres no WINNING #all my art recently has been very sketchy god watch this piece look shit when i line it #you know that art of zelda for the totk amiibo? yeaH #feel free to ignore this

[transwolvie]

I'm gonna have an angry brown person moment for a minute. I am SO sick of people treating the places I live or have lived as crime-ridden "dangerous" areas. It is literally the same fucking rhetoric as the right wing and if you talk about how big cities are "soooo dangerous" I am absolutely fucking side-eyeing you

I literally got back to one of my more active group chats after going to my uncle's wedding in NYC to see someone discussing THEY were going to NYC soon, only to be IMMEDIATELY met with someone wringing their hands over how NYC is so dangerous and they should stay safe etc etc. I literally jumped in and said, word for word, "well I was literally just there yesterday, I think you'll be fine."

I am sick sick SICK of people looking at where I live and telling me to be ~extra~ careful about my valuables or locking my house. There is NOT more crime here than there is in any fancy little suburban area. The most "crime" you'll see in NYC other than poor people being penalized for being poor is fucking turnstile hopping.

Stop talking about my neighborhoods like this because I KNOW y'all are doing it because there's poor and brown people! It's obvious! I would fucking know that you're exaggerating about the dangers of living in a poor bipoc neighborhood because I AM THE ONE THAT ACTUALLY LIVES THERE. White people shut up about places being "dangerous" challenge because WHAT YOU MEAN IS BROWN AND IT'S SO OBVIOUS AND YOU ARE SAYING IT TO /MY/ FACE? TO A FUCKING BROWN PERSON. SHUT THE FUCK UP.

#tomi talks #I was so fucking on edge when I got this new house I live in #because everyone's white ass wanted to chip on about safety #or about how I couldn't put my washing machine outside without a fence cuz it would get stolen #which like. bitch WHO is going to steal a WASHING MACHINE #white people are morons and the really realy really buy into the news #abt crime waves n shit #and it's like. firstly all of those 'crimes' are probs shoplifting n shit #cuz the only thing that caused a recent rise in violent crime was the pandemic. unrelated to locations. #honestly ppl can suck my ass I've been holding this in for ages #it makes me so fucking mad

[the-kipsabian]

.

#death // #really tho just. losing two family members within a week from one another is. really rough #even if it is from natural causes and old age it still feels very sudden #and even if we werent that close it still hurts #little things remind me of the grandparents i dont have anymore. like making dinner and realizing im not eating their cooking again #or my grandmas favorite songs. its just. rough #im just thinking a lot. and not looking forward to two funerals within the next few weeks #just.. yeah. i feel kinda fucked up on the inside. more so than usually but for once not cause of myself #its. odd to me. grief hasnt really been constant in my life in years. apart from losing my brothers cat few years ago #before that i lost my other grandma like eleven years ago. since then immediate family has been okay #its just weird. i dont really know how to grief. it comes in waves and odd memories and it feels really.. idk. off to me #ive had few crying fits over some random things but i just feel. numb. maybe its cause of the sudden frequency of these #or cause i dont know how to deal. its strange to me. feels out of place to mourn something other than what i made myself lost #maybe its cause while there was a connection there was a larger disconnection. i havent seen either of them since covid started #idk. regrets and shit and whatnot. i just feel all but nothing at the same time #just. just saying. idk. just wanna clean my brain a little. its been a difficult day. sorry #night is an absolute mess on main