#then when i went to sleep at 8 or 9 last night i stupidly took a lil bit of a gummy to pass me out easier | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

drawlfoy · 3 years

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Wonders of Ohio P.9

masterlist

requests are closed, but please read this first :)

if you want to be tagged, send an ask or message me!

pairing: draco x reader

request: nope, my original shameless self insert idea lmao

summary: american high school senior y/n y/l/n is in for the ride of her life when their exchange student is...a bit strange (but very hot). NOT a nonmagic AU, though you already knew that if you’ve read part 8 ;)

warnings: swearing, mentions of a break in, concerns about a home intruder, objectively the most fluffy scene we’ve gotten so far in this series (hehe), draco being fucking obnoxious and moody (did i mention swearing?)

a/n: ayoooooo so here’s part 9, as promised. i’ve started getting back into the hp universe more and more, so i should probably be picking up my writing soon. i’ve been feeling more myself again!! which is super awesome. i don’t think many people read this series anymore (or my author notes in general but i don’t blame yall) but i’m having a lot of fun writing it, so i’m going to keep going :)

music recs:

puppy princess -- hot freaks

loverboy -- A-wall

linger -- the cranberries

tags tags tags: @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @yesnerdsblog @shizarianathania @evanstanfanatic @strawberriesonsummer @hariosborn @night-ving @straightzoinked @imintoodeeptostop @naiomimoonshard @jejegu @ophelia-enthusiast @alwaysbeanunknownfan @nearly-memories @litty-dumb @callieclearwater @malfoy-wife15 @charlenasaxen @belladaises @fiantomartell @writeandtranslate @erisdogwood @loveissupernatural @sycathorn-slush @big-galaxy-chaos

word count: 3.8k :)

Y/N couldn’t help but wonder if Draco deliberately waited until the last minute to tell her family that he was leaving so he could evade her questioning. She tried to talk to him later that evening by knocking on his door, but she was met with complete silence.

Draco was ignoring her, and she didn’t get why. She’d promised to not tell anyone--even begged for him to trust her and essentially swore on her life--but he still wasn’t acting normal. Perhaps he didn’t want her to badger him with questions about the magical world.

Or maybe this was an excuse to get away from her.

Y/N swallowed the second possibility and locked it away somewhere out of sight. He’d left without a single word more to her (not even a congratulations for getting into a top 20 school, that loser) and never even bothered telling her when he’d return. And maybe that was the nicest part of it--she could pretend like he was never coming back.

As attractive as that option was, she had to admit that there was a Draco-shaped hole in her passenger car seat every time she drove to school. And in the kitchen when she was studying. And everywhere else he’d once touched.

“Why do you think he went back?”

Y/N took a break from reviewing her Art History final exam notes to look up at Lizzy. “Maybe something happened with his dad or he wanted to spend his holidays with his family? It’s probably not that serious.”

“Speaking of his dad, I tried to look up his name and see if anything came up,” Lizzy began. Y/N felt her heart jump into her throat. “Don’t you think it’s kinda sus? I haven’t found anything for him. It’s like he’s been completely wiped off the face of the earth. Do you know anything about it?”

“Honestly, I don’t think it’s any of my business.” Draco’s franticness when she found out lingered in the back of her mind as she chose her words carefully. “I’m sure if he’s a genuine political target, they’ve just scrubbed the web clean of him, being a minor and all.”

“But don’t you think it’s funny that he’s apparently so important but there’s no evidence of him or his father ever existing?”

“Lizzy.” Her voice was firm. “It’s entirely possible that his real name is different. And either way, it’s not our story to uncover. He’s entitled to his own privacy, and if he doesn’t reveal his true identity then we need to respect that.”

“Oooookaaayyyyy, Mother,” said Lizzy. “You’re so fun. You know that, right?”

“It’s my job.”

After the close brush with Lizzy, Y/N avoided the topic of Draco with her friends like wildfire. At the back of her mind, she registered that that was probably more suspicious, but when Sylvia asked her about him during lunch, she finally spun up a story.

“I told him I liked him,” she told everyone, the words stinging her throat. “He doesn’t feel the same way. I just would feel better if we dropped it.”

Her friends reacted immediately with sympathy, telling her that it wasn’t her fault that he couldn’t see her for what she was worth. Somehow, this made her feel worse. She didn’t even need to tell him her feelings to know his thoughts--he didn’t see her as anything but a “muggle”, or whatever he called them. She never stood a chance.

Y/N spent an embarrassing amount of time wondering how things would’ve been different if she was a witch. She didn’t know anything about his world (apart from the fact that they really had a stick up their asses about people knowing of them) but she somehow craved a place in it. Would Draco feel differently towards her if she was magic?

It was probably better if she didn’t pay too much mind to it, but she couldn’t let the thought go. Every time she shut her eyes at night, the memory of waking up next to Draco replayed in her head, over and over. She would’ve sold her soul to have gone back to that. Would things have been different if she had just...not found the letters? She was driving herself crazy digging through all her interactions with him. There’s no way she was imagining things, and judging by the surprised reactions of her friends when she told them he didn’t reciprocate feelings, she wasn’t the only one who thought something was there. If he was really so disgusted by her and her people, he wouldn’t have let her sleep in his room, in his bed no less.

As December wore on, her mind began to be occupied by another feverish stream of thoughts. If she didn’t already feel like she was going crazy over the Draco problem, she was going completely insane over the fact that she was misplacing things like crazy and forgetting the most basic of things. It seemed like it was almost every day that she was forgetting where she put her keys (even though she could’ve sworn she’d hung them up by the door) or getting home to find the door already unlocked even though she was sure that she’d locked it behind her. It would’ve creeped her out, but she was really off kilter. It just wasn’t right having Draco away, and the sense of dread she got every time she went by her room just threw her off balance. What if she still had lingering sickness from whatever magical infliction she suffered?

He really should’ve stuck around to watch after me. Just in case.

Another thing was bothering her--a name she saw pop up in the pouch from when she went through his letters. It was a small portion of his collection, and she didn’t even think to examine it until after he took them back from her, but she noticed that the name “Pansy Parkinson” came up more than once as a return address.

Her mind immediately jumped to the worst--Draco was madly in love with another girl, a magical girl, and traveled back home with the express purpose of declaring his neverending devotion for her and complaining about that rat Ohioan muggle that he had to spend his days with.

Y/N knew it wasn’t healthy, but no matter what she did, she couldn’t quite shake it. The fact that he’d no doubt grown up around girls that would be suitable for him to date was making her physically ill with jealousy, which was probably the most embarrassing part of her feelings for him. Nevermind how much time she spent fantasizing about how soft his hair felt or how his stupidly pretty fingers would feel grazing her skin--she couldn’t even cope with the idea of him existing with other women that were honestly a better choice to him.

That Christmas was surprisingly bleak. Being an only child always made for a quiet house during the holidays, but the expectation she held of having Draco there set her up for disappointment. Her house felt empty.

“Do you think he’s coming back?” Y/N asked her mother as they did the morning dishes together.

“Well, I assume so. Why wouldn’t he? He was scheduled to spend the entire year with us. I think that if he’s changed his mind we would at least know by now.”

“What if he’s still deciding?”

“Why, miss him already?” Mrs. Y/L/N’s tone was teasing, but she felt her cheeks grow hot.

“Quite the contrary. I’m just wondering if I’m about to become the pampered only child again or if I’m going to need to go back into the unglamorous life of sharing the spotlight.”

“Y/N,” her mother tutted. She’d stopped doing the dishes.

Y/N made a point to evade her knowing look. “Mom.”

Her mother took a breath before answering. “Nothing. As a matter of fact, I did get a letter from him a few days ago. He’s scheduled to return the second week of January, right before school goes back.”

“Oh,” said Y/N. No matter how hard she tried, there’s no way her relief wasn’t visible.

“How’s that for your Christmas gift, hm?”

“Mom!”

“Hey! Hey, it was a joke,” Mrs. Y/L/N said, throwing her hands up in a “no can do” sort of gesture. “I know that you’re good friends with him is all. Unless…”

“Mom!” Her cheeks were all shades of red.

“All I’m saying is that he seems to enjoy your company.”

“Stockholm syndrome, I’m telling you.” Her explanation of what that meant was on the tip of her tongue before she stopped herself. There was no reason to--the only person who would need that explained to them was no longer on the same continent as her.

“Whatever you’d like to think.”

The snowstorm hit them without warning, two days after Christmas. Her parents had left for the night to attend a charity auction, but unfortunately for Y/N, by the time that they realized that their daughter would be snowed in, the roads were too dangerous to drive on. Y/N begrudgingly agreed to do all of the things they told her to--get the generator ready, make sure the fireplace was prepared, and locate all the candles in the house.

On any normal day, she wouldn’t have been concerned in the slightest, but she’d felt uneasy in her house ever since the night of the break-in, and now that this was the first night she’d have to spend alone, her heart was pounding at the thought of having to sleep in an empty house. Especially if the power was out. Especially when whoever broke in was still on the loose.

She locked up at dusk, making sure that every entry to her home was completely sealed shut. The generator was in the basement, all set up in the case that the lights went out. She’d located all the bottled water in her house in case the pipes froze, and she finally retired to her room to relax.

The sense of dread that hovered around Draco’s room was gone, thankfully. The overall feeling of creepiness was just beginning to lose its jarring sting, but she’d never quite been able to shake how many things she misplaced in the beginning of the month.

She busied herself with mundane activities--she cleaned out her closet, organized her drawers, read, changed her sheets, and finished the last of her homework--but nothing could distract her from the gnawing inside of her. The hairs on the back of her neck constantly stood up, even when she was tucked away in the corner of her room, nestled into her blankets. The tingling was akin to what she felt when she walked into that antique shop on homecoming night--the same night when Draco helped her off her feet and narrowly kept her from throwing up all over Heather.

Looking back on it, she realized that when he grabbed her wrist, he must’ve done something to quell her nausea, something magical. There was no way her carsickness could’ve been able to disappear so quickly.

Her soliloquy was interrupted by what sounded like footsteps outside. Before she could assess the situation and decide what she was going to do, a boom sounded off in the distance and she was all of a sudden bathed in darkness.

Y/N froze.

Someone was most definitely outside her house, but thankfully she’d locked all the doors. And, thankfully, the boom told her that her fuse box hadn’t been messed with. A tree had probably just fallen on a transformer.

But those small comforts still didn’t change the fact that she was no longer alone--and not only that, but no longer alone without power.

Her thoughts were interrupted once again by banging on her front door. Y/N jumped, just barely managing to clap her hand over her mouth to muffle her shriek. She’d seen enough horror movies to know that alerting someone that you were home wasn’t the smartest move. She’d have to be strategic.

Heart pounding out of her chest, she crept out of her room and down the stairs. The power outage was quite lucky, she realized, as whoever was outside couldn’t see in. The moon only cast a slight light as it reflected off of the snow, so she was going to be able to see the person outside before they would see her.

She squinted from her perch by the base of the staircase. She could make out a silhouette, a tall and lanky one. The weak moonlight reflected off a very light head of hair, and Y/N was struck with a feeling of familiarity.

No way...

Y/N stood frozen for a few seconds as she heard the person knock on the door again. A muffled version of a familiar British voice said, “Is anyone there?”

Throwing all caution to the wind and praying to any higher power that was listening to her that her suspicion was correct, she pushed down on the doorknob and swung it open.

Her heart stopped.

“Draco? What are you--”

Before she could get another word out of her mouth, she was pulled into the tightest (and snowiest) hug of her life. One of his arms wrapped solidly around her waist, the other reaching further up to her shoulders to hold her closer. He was tall enough in comparison that he could rest his chin on the top of her head while she cautiously clasped her hands around him, breathing in the same soft pine scent that she knew so well.

When he finally let go of her, she noticed that his face was decidedly less pale than what it had been when she first opened the door. At a loss for words, Y/N just made her way behind him and shut the door to keep the storm from blowing any more snowflakes in. She noted that Draco was shaking.

“You’re okay,” he said, his voice low and quiet.

She grinned. “Yeah. Believe it or not, I’m not that scared of the dark.”

He didn’t look nearly as amused, wringing his hands out in front of him instead of meeting her eyes.

“You’re going to freeze to death if you’re gonna just stand there in soaking clothes,” she chided. “And what are you doing back half a month early? I know you must’ve missed me, but I didn’t expect you to miss me THAT much.”

He rolled his eyes, bringing Y/N the comfort that the sarcastic asshole was still in there. “We need to talk.”

“No, what you need to do is get changed into dry clothes,” she said. “Not sure if you’ve noticed, but until we get our generator working, there’s no heat...and I’m not sure if the Ministry is going to like it if I let you die on my watch.”

Even though he didn’t normally laugh at her jokes, he seemed especially solemn when she said this. It became very clear to her then that he regretted his brief display of affection.

“What are you doing, just standing here? Shoo! I don’t want to see you dripping snow all over the rug.” She waved him off until he made his way up the stairs, still eerily silent.

Once she was sure he was actually getting dressed, she made her way to the kitchen where she started heating up the water. She’d never been more thankful for the fact that they had a gas stove instead of an electric one.

The tea was almost finished brewing by the time that Draco was back downstairs, perched awkwardly on the couch. She’d never seen his sweater before--it was in a rich forest green with a silver crest of a snake.

“Are you going to tell me whatever is going on? I’ve never seen you like this before,” asked Y/N as she handed him the mug that she knew to be his favorite.

He took a sip and waited a bit before responding. “I found out some things while I was away.”

“Is that it? Must’ve been something pretty interesting for you to come in here and act like I’m your long lost love or whatever.” She took careful note of how his cheeks were especially pink, but it must’ve been because of the cold.

“I shouldn’t tell you everything, but I think you should probably know the gist of things,” he began. “First of all, I figured out why I couldn’t use the Obliviation cube on you. Also, you have to consent to an Unbreakable Vow.”

“A...what? Care to elaborate? Like, at least a little? Why didn’t it work on me?”

He sighed, a sharp breath of air that left his lungs in a huff. “Because you stumbled upon a very important box that can bestow the gift of magic onto anyone. And since you did something in your dream to try and open it, it permanently took root in you. I tried to reverse it, but there’s always going to be an imprint of magic on you.”

“Sick. So I’m a witch now? Like you?”

“No.” His tone was sour. “No, you’re not. For that to work, there needs to be a ritual actually completed by someone magical. That’s why you got so sick--because you would’ve needed me to help you through your dream sequence and open up the box. So, now that you’ve essentially pushed yourself into the magical world uninvited, I can’t use anything on you that’s catered towards Muggles.”

“Rats,” said Y/N. “That’s no fun. What about the whole part about my safety? And what’s that vow thing?”

“Apparently someone really, really wants that box,” Draco told her. “It doesn’t just give muggles the gift of magic--it can also give current wizards powers that are otherwise completely unavailable to the rest of the population. In the wrong hands, they could wreak havoc on the world. And I’m almost positive they think you have it.”

“Oh…” Everything started falling into place. “So, the break in? That probably was them right? And, uh, let’s say if you feel like maybe someone has been in your house while you’ve been gone? Like, that’s something I should be worried about, right?”

“Is that happening to you?” His face looked significantly more pale.

Y/N was tempted to tell him no--just to ease his nerves--but something in his look told her that she needed to be truthful. “Um, kind of. You know how I can be forgetful, though. It’s just little things, like sometimes I come home to find that the front door is unlocked when I’m sure I locked it, or I can’t find little things like my car keys and my phone, but it’s all easily explained.”

“I never should’ve left,” he said, tucked his knees up to his chest. “I should’ve known that that was Merlin’s Box.” He swallowed, meeting her eyes with a gaze that looked so forlorn that her heart ached. “I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, hey, all we have to do is tell them I don’t have the box, right? And then they’ll leave me alone.”

“I don’t know,” he admitted. “I assume so, but if they didn’t find the box when they originally ransacked your room and they’re still hanging around, I don’t know what to do. That’s why I can’t obliviate you, the proper way that we use on wizards, because I can’t always be there to save you. Once I’m gone, you’re going to have to manage on your own.”

“Please, Draco,” said Y/N. “People will always talk a big game, but once I pull out my pepper spray it’s over. I can take care of myself! I didn’t need protection while you’re away.”

He smiled then, a small one that seemed more sad than anything. “You sound like me. When I was younger.”

“You probably don’t even know what pepper spray is. What’s that vow thing?”

“You have to promise that you won’t say anything that would reveal what you know about me and my world,” said Draco. “I need to find a wizard to say the incantations, but it shouldn’t be too hard. I ended up telling the Ministry what happened--I’m not going to get sent away as they have a clear record of me at least attempting to wipe your memory and they agree that you need to be able to protect yourself. Unbreakable Vows are just really intense promises. If you break it, you die.”

“Is that your way of saying you don’t really trust my word?”

He rolled his eyes. “It’s required by the Ministry. If you don’t comply, then you’re going to be completely obliviated and then you can have as much fun as you’d like trying to run from whoever that criminal is without even knowing why they’re after you. Oh, and without me.”

“Then why are you even offering the vow? Don’t you want to go home?”

Draco took a long drink from his mug. “I still have a sentence to carry out. If I go back home, I’ll get sent to the same prison that my father is being held at right now.”

“A...sentence?” Y/N stared at him. “I know you mentioned a punishment, but a sentence?”

He remained silent and refused to meet her eyes.

“Draco, what exactly did you have to do?”

“It’s none of your business,” he snapped. The sudden switch of tone made Y/N start, but he was unwavering in his scowl. “I’d prefer to not think about it.”

“But...Draco…” Y/N cast her gaze to the ground so she didn’t have to see the no doubt furious look in his eyes when she continued to push. “How bad? Do you think that maybe whoever is after me might know that I don’t have the box anymore? And that they might be trying to seek revenge against you for whatever it was that you did instead?”

He didn’t respond.

“Think about it. That would explain why I was untouched this whole time that you were away when they were still keeping tabs on me.”

With a pronounced bonk, he set his mug down on the coffee table. “I’m going to bed.”

She managed to get one more look at his face before he spun around to head up the stairs and was shocked to see what was etched into his face--anger, yes, frustration...and also shame. Unmistakable shame.

final a/n: weeoooooooo i’m like 3 minutes early...this is a monumental moment for my blog. let me know what you guys think (if there’s still people sticking with this series fjkds;al). i am going to go back into my hole and work on some math hw (wonders of ohio y/n vibes...i have low key become her trying to roleplay as a stem girl). the plot is going to thicken and hopefully there will be more fluff soon. i honestly didn’t want to add the hug bc i do want this to be slow burn but it has come to my attention that this is now about 30k words long and i haven’t given y’all so much as an inkling that draco has feelings/anything will happen between them so i gotta give you something to hold you over fjdska;

#draco x reader #draco imagine #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy imagine #draco x you #draco malfoy x you #draco x oc #draco malfoy x oc #draco malfoy #draco #dracotok #draco x y/n #draco malfoy x y/n

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thisisgonnafuxkinkillme · 3 years

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Save Me, Please!

Chapter 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 ...

𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰:

Stalking, gaslighting, phycological manipulation, anything that has to do with the yandere trope.

Months later, you were lonelier than ever. Each day was the same. Work, home. Work, home. Work, home. After that God awful experience, you were utterly uninterested in dating. The only other human you ever communicated with regularly was All Might, and those conversations were so one sided that you couldn’t get yourself excited to see him. He’d never let you get half of a word in before asking another question, or giving another compliment.

You had to admit, though, he was sweet, and he did certainly brighten up your day at least a little bit.

What began as an occasional sighting before work became a daily walk with you. It was almost as if he was your personal escort.

“I just don't want you to get hurt! You’ve seen the news, haven’t you?” is what he’d say, before whisking you away. You couldn’t really protest all that much in the end.

One day, as you were leaving from work, you saw him waiting for you. He looked different, and you could definitely tell that he had gotten ready to see you.

He had his hands behind his back, hiding some kind of surprise. You approached him semi-hesitantly, not sure what he had in store.

“Y/n! I’m so glad I got to see you again!” he beamed. You forced a laugh. He saw you literally every single day. This morning, even.

He presented the gift to you: a comically large bouquet of flowers, of all different kinds, but the most prominent ones in the middle were your favorite.

How did he know that?

You were shocked, looking up at him for reassurance. He met you with a sweet grin.

“So, um...y/n... I’d like to ask you something,” he mumbled, bending down to meet you at your level.

“What is it?”

“Um...would you like to...have coffee with me? Or...something?”

You spoke before you could think.

“Yes, I’d love to!”

His face lit up even more than usual, which you didn’t even think could be humanly possible at this point.

“Are you free tomorrow? In the morning? Or maybe tonight? Or, what about right now? Can you do it right now?”

“Um... can we do something more like Saturday? It’s only like 3 days away,” you offer. His eye twitches a little.

“Why not tomorrow? I know you get off early. Come on, it’ll be fun!”

“How...how did you know I got off earlier tomorrow?”

“Oh, you mentioned that to me once! Don’t you remember?”

“I...I guess I do. Okay, I’ll meet you tomorrow after work, then.”

The day came and went peacefully. You retreated into the restroom right after clocking out to tidy yourself up a little before your...date?

I guess that's what you could call it.

All Might was waiting for you outside, wearing a completely unnecessarily extravagant suit. This heavily contrasted with your business casual attire, and it brought many unwanted stares.

"Oh! There you are! You made me worry that you may not show up!" He grinned, gripping you in a too-tight bear hug.

It'd only taken you an extra 5 minutes to get tidied up. Maybe even less.

"Um...where are we supposed to be going?" You asked, trying to figure out why he'd be dressing like that.

"I thought you picked out a place!" He laughed. You sighed, shaking your head.

But eventually you both settled on a nice-ish restaurant down the road.

You took your seats and began chatting as usual. Everything was fine, nearly perfect, really, until the waiter came to take your drink orders.

He was around your age, his face soft and kind yet handsome. He was totally your type.

"What can I get for you, pretty lady? Oh, and for you, sir?" He asked, pen in hand.

The hero's eyes flashed.

"I'll just have a soda, please!" You smiled. All Might broke out of his internal monologue for a moment at the sound of your voice.

"I will have one of those as well."

You stupidly didn't notice anything was wrong.

"Alright, here's your sodas, and what can I get for your lovely daughter, sir?"

"my...what?" He slammed his fist on the table.

"Calm down! It's not a big deal!" You scream-whispered. He clenched his teeth, sighing. Your heart was beating out of your chest; you'd never seen All Might ever act like this. Frankly, you were scared.

"I deeply apologize, miss. I didn't mean to assume anything."

"Oh, it's fine! People tell me I look young for my age all the time."

"oh? How old are you, then?"

"That's enough,” All Might gritted. His knuckles were white at this point.

All Might slammed a few bills on the table, grabbing you by the arm and basically dragging you out.

"Hey, what the hell?! What's your problem?" You spat, crossing your arms.

"My problem is...ugh!! You don't know?"

You balled up your fists. Of course you didn't know.

"Why can't you just tell me? Why do you always need to act so fucking weird around me?!"

His eye twitched. But he remained strangely, unsettlingly calm.

"Oh, y/n... I just want you to stay safe. Surely you can understand that, can't you?" He purred, petting you gently on your head.

You swallowed.

"I...I get that..."

He smiled sweetly, as if nothing was wrong just moments ago.

You spent the rest of your date walking in the park, which was even more ridiculous considering he was still donning the extravagant suit and the weather was much too hot for anything like that.

That night, you flipped on the TV, but stopped as BREAKING NEWS flashed on the bottom of the screen.

"There is currently an 8pm curfew out after the third incident this year of a seemingly spontaneous murder. The victim, 2X year old Martin Grey, is the third victim in a series of seemingly connected murders. Officials Are urging all citizens to stay inside, and to report any suspicious activity."

You sighed, flipping off the television.

I'm so sick of hearing all this negative bullshit news...

It took you much longer than usual to get to sleep that night. Something just felt... incredibly wrong. You tried to convince yourself that you were totally safe, but the darkened corners of your room reached out to you, drawing off of your panic.

Finally, after taking way too many melatonin, your eyes shut and you drifted away.

When you woke up from your not so peaceful sleep, you couldn’t move. You were experiencing sleep paralysis, and no matter how much you fought, not a single muscle even flinched.

In the corner of your room, you saw him.

It was a familiar face, but you couldn’t pinpoint who exactly it was. He was huddled at the head of the bed, silently staring at you while he was bathed in the black inkiness of night.

He noticed your fluttering eyelids, frowning. Yet he said nothing. All you could do was helplessly watch as he retreated out of your room.

You were still fighting the paralysis even after he was gone, as well as the pure terror that came with it.

As soon as you got control of your bodily functions, you immediately shot up and googled what just happened.

“Sleep paralysis is a fairly common occurrence that doesn’t signify any mental or spiritual unrest...” a website told you. You sighed.

It wasn’t real. It didn’t happen.

...Right?

You began your day, and since it was a weekend all you had to do was make a pot of coffee and get going.

When you entered your kitchen, you noticed something.

The window was wide open.

———

“All Might... I think someone broke into my apartment last night,” you whimpered into the phone. You didn’t even say hello. You just had to tell someone, anyone about what happened.

He remained silent.

“I...I saw him,” you mumbled shakily, “but... I don’t know why he didn’t... do anything. I don’t know what he wanted.”

“This is why I’m so concerned for you, y/n. You’re always making mistakes like forgetting to lock your windows, and-“

You cut him off.

“How did you know he came in through the window?”

He didn’t even hesitate, replying, “You just said your window was open. Don’t you remember? You’re so silly sometimes, you know.”

You sighed.

“Can you just come over and help me change my locks? I... don’t feel safe anymore.”

He agreed to stop at the hardware store and come over right away.

He'd never been to your apartment before, so he did have to ask for directions. However, it wasn't hard to find you.

Before you could text him the final turning direction, he was already knocking at your door.

In his hands was a kit for new door locks as well as window locks. That afternoon was filled with lots of unscrewing, questions, googling, and troubleshooting, but once he was finished, you admittedly already began to feel safer.

"Thank you so much. It means a lot to me. Seeing that man was just...really scary." You sighed, eyeing the kitchen window. You imagined him sneaking in ever so quietly, standing in the darkest recesses of your room, silently staring at you.

"Like I told you, I want you to be safe. If you weren't...I think I might just go crazy, you know?" He joked.

"I do have something to ask you, though, y/n," he began, "what did he look like?"

"Well, I didn't get a good look. Really, I was convinced he wasn't real until...the window."

All Might didn't pry. He really didn't want to make you remember something you didn't care to think about.

#yagi toshinori #yandere yagi toshinori #yandere all might #yandere! all might #all might x reader #small might x reader

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horansqueen · 3 years

Text

Stuck With You - Chapter 20

Chapter 20: Everytime We Touch

🡪chapter 1 🡪chapter 2 🡪chapter 3 🡪chapter 4 🡪chapter 5 🡪chapter 6 🡪chapter 7 🡪chapter 8 🡪chapter 9 🡪chapter 10 🡪chapter 11 🡪chapter 12 🡪chapter 13 🡪chapter 14 🡪chapter 15 🡪chapter 16 🡪chapter 17 🡪chapter 18 🡪chapter 19

College Enemies To Lovers AU

characters // masterlist // instagrams // mood board

I still hear your voice when you sleep next to me I still feel your touch in my dreams Forgive me my weakness but I don't know why Without you it's hard to survive'

Cuz everytime we touch, I get this feeling, & Everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly, Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last, Need you by my side.'

Cause every time we touch, I feel this static, And every time we kiss, I reach for the sky, Can't you hear my heart beat so, I can't let you go, Want you in my life.

click here to be on the update list

NIALL

I could see a bunch of questions running through her mind as her eyes roamed on my face but what hurt me the most is when she took a step back.

"What are you doing here?" she finally asked a bit rudely, making Daxia frown.

"I'm just.. I'm here with Lewis." I let out stupidly, making me close my eyes for a few seconds. "I didn't know you'd be... I didn't know it would be you."

Her face suddenly changed and somehow, I realized I had hurt her and I was not sure why.

"I should just leave." she let out, walking past me as I grabbed her upper arm gently. The way two of my fingers pressed against her skin made my heart skip a beat and I swallowed.

"Please, stay." I let out in a low tone. "I don't want to ruin your night. If you want me to leave, I will."

She looked up in my eyes, her lips parting again, and glanced at Lewis and Daxia who were talking together. I could hear my friend whisper and Daxia chuckle like a schoolgirl. They didn't even listen to us and she looked back at me as I let my fingers slide on her arm before letting her go completely. She looked down at my hand and licked her lips before pressing them together.

"No, stay." she said softly. "If you leave, who am I gonna laugh at these two with?"

I stared at her and her lips curled slightly on the right, making me smile too. I chuckled and nodded but we remained motionless for a few seconds. There was a lock of her hair falling in front of her eyes and I swallowed again before reaching for it, placing it behind her ear.

"Thank you." I whispered.

She nodded with a shy smile and turned around, making me blink a few times. I followed everyone inside but grabbed Lewis, moving close to his ear to whisper.

"You could have told me!"

"I didn't know!" he let out with a chuckle. "She really said she was bringing a Caroline, totally your type, I've seen a picture! But hey it's even better. You wanted to talk to Devon and she's right here!"

I groaned and raised my nose up, still looking in front of me. I wanted to talk to Devon, that much was true, but doing it in a crowded restaurant with two of our friends was not what I had in mind. I looked at her as I sat next to her, a bit surprised that Lewis didn't sit in front of Daxia, but I didn't mention it. Feeling Devon's thigh press against mine was going to be distracting, I knew it, but I wouldn't want it otherwise.

We ordered and when the waitress left, Lewis sent a smile to Daxia before looking at me, and then at Devon.

"I thought you were bringing some girl named Caroline?" he let out cautiously. "And Devon, you didn't tell me you had something planned tonight."

"Caroline canceled last minute." Daxia explained. "I had to beg Devon to replace her. She was not in a good mood apparently, and now I suspect it's your fault."

When she turned to me and raised her eyebrows, I sat up straight and leaned my back on the bench. I was glad Devon had not mentioned anything but at the same time, I couldn't deny Daxia's words. I ended up just clearing my throat and taking a sip of my beer. I heard Devon chuckle next to me and turned my head to look at her, sending her a small smile and raising my eyebrows.

"Oh you think it's funny?" I asked, amused and happy to see her like that. "That her first thought is that I'm the one who made you in a bad mood?"

"Very." she admitted, tilting her chin up. "Besides, is she wrong?"

My smile turned into a fond one and then faltered. I had hurt her again. I knew it was a misunderstanding, but I still had hurt her and I hated it. What did I need to change to make sure I would never hurt her again? Was it just my attitude towards her? Or did I have to re-think my whole personality? We looked at each other for a few seconds. She had her head tilted and her smile was gone but her gaze was soft and I wanted to explain everything to her. Instead, I let my eyes move down to her lips before looking back up.

"I'm sorry, Devie." I whispered, trying not to blink, not wanting to miss half a second of the way she was looking at me. "I'm so sorry I hurt you again."

I could read surprise in her eyes but she didn't have time to answer. The waitress came with our food and we started eating together. I smirked a few times as Devon and I glanced at each other while watching Daxia and Lewis flirt awkwardly with each other, but as usual, Lewis was hilarious and I laughed at all his jokes.

I held my breath when I felt Devon's thigh press more against mine and frowned a bit when I felt something brush against my jeans. I looked down subtly and noticed her pinky rubbing on my thigh, wondering if she was doing it on purpose. She grabbed her glass of wine and swallowed what was left it it, making me think she was probably tipsy by now. I cleared my throat, slide my hand on my jeans and reaching for her pinky with mine. I saw her tense as my little finger brushed gently on hers and she pressed her lips together. I knew she could feel it too, an electric shock as soon as our skin touched and then, an intense sensation of warmth. It made me wonder how it would feel like to let my fingertips travel on her naked body and I blinked a few times, trying to get out of my daydream.

What took me out of my thoughts was the sound of my cellphone and I quickly stretched to reach it in my pocket, making Devon take her hand back. I checked my text messages and there was one of Lewis that simply said 'Okay we're good you can leave now!' I looked up at him, frowning at him and shaking my head slightly. He simply raised his eyebrows and I rolled my eyes with a low sigh.

"Okay so hey, I'll let you guys eat dessert together, I-uhm, I have to go."

I glanced at Devon who frowned but when she turned to Daxia, her face changed too.

"Uhm, yea, I have to leave too, so.. Dax, I'll see you in class?"

"Mmhm, and thanks for coming!"

I got up and took my wallet in my other pocket before leaving a bill on the table. I glanced at Devon who was also looking through her wallet and I held my breath as I put my hand on her wrist.

"It's okay, I'm inviting."

I watched her look down at the bill on the table as she nibbled her bottom lip. She seemed torn between accepting because she was in serious need of money or refusing because she was one of the most stubborn girls I had ever met.

"Mm, no, it's okay, I can pay for my-"

"Please, please let me." I quickly cut her as her eyes met mine. "I owe you that."

It took her a few seconds but she finally nodded and followed me outside. We took one last glance at Daxia and Lewis before turning to each other and bursting into laughter. The air of the night was getting cool but we had both drank enough to stay warm. We walked slowly on the sidewalk and I heard her sigh next to me.

"I'm sorry, I can't drive, I drank a bit too much."

"I know, I'm good with walking." she admitted with a shrug.

I was glad to walk her home but somehow, I wished she would forget where she lived and end up in my room, with me. I knew it was impossible but I still let that thought invade my brain for a few seconds.

"I didn't pay Lewis to get you out of the room." I let out, feeling my heart jump in my chest. I didn't want to admit that I had feelings for her but it was getting more obvious as the days went by. I could try to lie to myself all I wanted, I had feelings for Devon. Everyone knew it except for her, and for me, since I didn't want to accept it. But it didn't change anything. It was a fact, as far as feelings can be facts.

"Yea, Louis told me I jumped to conclusion a bit too fast." she confessed after a few minutes of silence. "I'm ready to listen to you."

"Devie, you-" I stopped myself and sighed. "You seemed so disappointed that you had to stay... You told me you really wanted to leave the room, that we were bad for each other.. I just wanted to make you happy. I didn't want you to feel stuck in a place that you hated, with someone that made you uncomfortable. I promise I had no bad intention."

Once again, a silence took place between us and I saw her lick her lips nervously. "I never said we were bad for each other. Just that it was intense between us." she corrected me, looking up in my eyes. "Don't you think?"

"I thought you meant intense.. in a bad way."

"No, not at all." she quickly replied. "You... you infuriate me sometimes but, I don't know." she shrugged and sighed. "You make me feel alive, too. I hadn't realize how numb I felt after that story with my teacher but with you, I don't know."

I felt the left corner of my lips raise a bit. I should tell her she made me feel exactly like that too, and even more, but the words got stuck in my throat. That seemed to be something that happened a lot when I was around her. I felt her fingers brush against mine as we walked and a shiver ran up my spine.

"Devie." I whispered as I stopped walking. She turned to me and I breathed in before sighing. "I'm sorry If I've hurt you. No, I know I hurt you. I'm sorry I did. I know apologizing doesn't solve everything, and you don't have to accept it, but... I'm sorry. Sincerely."

I wanted to tell her that I didn't mean to but it would be a lie. Almost every time I had hurt her, I had done it on purpose to keep her away from me, because I was scared of how I would feel if she got closer. It felt different now. I didn't want to let my old wounds and experiences ruin what I could have. And if Devon ended up giving me new wounds, I would deal with it.

"I'm sorry too." she breathed out, taking me by surprise. "I acted with you like you owed me something. You don't owe me anything, Niall. I should have kept my mood swings hidden. It wasn't fair of me to expect things from you and then get pissed when you didn't give them to me. I'm sorry."

"There's really no reason for you to apologize."

She sent me a small but fond smile and started walking again.

"Was your friend really getting rid of his mattress." she asked, making me raise my nose up in a grimace and push my hands in my pockets.

"No, I bought you a new one."

"Thank you." she let out gently, making me glance at her. "For the mattress, and for telling the truth."

My upper arm brushed against hers and once again, i felt something invade my body, like some sort of static shock or electricity. It made me want to kiss her but I just focused on getting my heartbeats back to normal.

"Lewis said I should propose you rides every morning. I wanted us to keep in touch so when he said that, I didn't argue."

"And why did you want my painting as a payment?"

"Because... because it makes me feel things, and because I'm still trying to figure out the story behind it... Because every picture, every painting, every song... every piece of art, tells a story. It's not the same story for the people enjoying it, but the artist had feelings and thoughts. Every artist has a story. I wanted to know what story was behind that painting. I still haven't figured it out."

I noticed we had stopped and she was looking up at me, her head tiltied slightly. We were at her apartment now, but I didn’t want hr to leave. I felt connected with her in a way I hadn't in a while with an other human being. It was nice to see her every day, laugh with her, chat about futile things with her, but when we dug deeper together, we found treasures.

"Why can't you just look at my painting and make up your own story? Something that comes from your own experiences?"

Her question was genuine and legitimate, and my answer was a bit too emotional, but I didn't know what else to answer.

"Because I want to know everything there is to know about you."

My voice was soft and low and without thinking, I bent down slightly as my eyes roamed on her face. I wanted to kiss her. I was ready to give anything just to feel her lips on mine, but I still moved slowly. She swallowed, her lips parted, and I heard her pant when my mouth brushed against her. Her eyes fluttered just as I closed mine but when i pushed my lips against hers, she back away.

"No, please stop."

I opened my eyes again, feeling my heart jump in my chest and threating to rip my chest apart to escape. I stared at her as she shook her head but I remained motionless, a bit shocked by her reaction.

"We, we can't." she added, licking her lips. "I don't want this anymore."

"What?" I murmured, not even sure what she meant.

"It's just going nowhere. We kiss, and make out, and then you ignore me. Or you go shag an other girl. Why were you here tonight? To meet some random girl? Why do you even want to kiss me, Niall? Why me?"

I was taken aback by how calm she was, almost resigned, and it was way scarier than when she yelled. It was like she had thought about it, like she wouldn't give in to her impulses or mine anymore, and it terrified me.

"I came here to help Lewis, I told him I didn't want to end up with anyone." I just explained, taking a step closing. "With you, it's different Devie. I'm just.. I'm attracted to you like a magnet."

"A magnet, yea, that's a good example." she swallowed hard. "We're so similar that we repulse each other, Niall. We're both stuck in our old relationships with scars that won't fade, even less disappear. I don't know why you're trying to heal with me but it's useless. You know it is."

"What if I promise not to hurt you again-"

"But you will!" she argued, answering quickly. "Look let's just, forget it okay? Thanks for bringing me back home." She opened the door before walking in but turned to me to look at me. "I won't need a ride on monday, okay? Thanks."

I stood there, motionless and upset at her words as they played over and over in my head. Perhaps I had ruined my chance a long time ago.

---

I hit the door of my room a few times after trying to unlock it four times. I had ended up at a bar only to swallow a few drinks and go back to my room. It didn't help at all. Now, I was sad and drunk, which was a horrible mix.

"Hey, Neil, calm down!" Louis let out, getting out of his room quickly. "You're gonna wake everyone up!"

I turned to him and scoffed, shaking my head. "You! You shut the fuck up okay? I hold you responsible for this!"

"You're so fookin' eloquent when you're drunk, seriously." Louis rolled his eyes and sighed, closing the door of his room and grabbing the keys from my hands, He unlocked the door for me and pushed me inside before following me. "Sit down."

I had no idea why, but I did as he asked and he sighed again. "Can you get undressed by yourself?"

I groaned and blinked slowly, trying to stop the room from turning but when he reached for my shirt and tried to help me take it off, I pushed his hands away. "Hey back off!" I yelled, frowning. "It's not a mom I need right now it's a friend!"

Reluctantly, he sat next to me and I closed my eyes, feeling suddenly even more dizzy. I opened my eyes again and groaned more.

"I tried to kiss her and she pushed me away." I just mumbled, making Louis sigh again.

"Maybe she's tired of your little game."

I turned to him and frowned as my jaw dropped slightly. "Wha? What do you know?"

"You need to stop playing with her feelings, Niall. You're just hurting her." he continued, ignoring my question. "She's fragile okay, she doesn't need you to go hot and cold with her. She doesn't deserve that."

"I tried to tell her you know. I tried to tell her how I feel. I apologized but I couldn't tell her that.." I stopped myself and shook my head. "I couldn't tell her... I can't say it out loud."

"Well find the courage, or the guts, or whatever you need. Because if you don't tell her, you'll lose her. As simple as that."

"Louis, nothing is simple okay, this isn't simple, this is complex, this is complicated, this is confusing." I let out without thinking. "You need to tell her to give me a chance."

"I'm not gonna do that."

"Why?" I whined with a grimace. "You want her all for yourself is that it?"

"Please. Shut up."

I was getting mad at him and I was not sure why. He was not the one who had hurt Devon. He was not the one who had made mistakes after mistakes. He was not the one who had ruined his chance at happiness. The first one I had got in a long time, too. It was all on me.

"You're annoying. You're annoying and she's annoying too!" I complained, moving my hand in front of his face. "Tell her to fuck off. Tell her I don't care."

"You don't know what you're saying."

"Yes I do!" I argued again, my voice a bit louder. "She'd just end up breaking my heart and cheating on me with you anyway! Better off without!"

"Okayyy, someone needs a rest now."

I took off my clothes with difficulty and lied down in bed, eyes closed and face in my pillow. I couldn't stop thinking about Devon and the fact that she had given up. It took her a while, I should be thankful that she even gave me so many chances. I took none, but that was my mistake, my problem. And I couldn't stop the voice in my head telling me that it was over and that I would never be happy again. Or the other voice that said that it's exactly what I deserved. To be alone and loveless, exactly the way I had hoped for before I met Devon.

#niall horan #niall horan smut #niall horan fluff #niall horan fanfic #niall horan fan fic #niall horan fanfiction #niall horan fan fiction #niall horan au #niall horan college au #niall horan enemies to lovers #niall horan uni au #my fanfics #swy

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let-it-raines · 4 years

Text

another kind of green (9/10)

Emma Swan spends her days in pretty white dresses and heavy layers of makeup. Day after day and dress after dress, she poses for pictures and acts like she’s in love and having the happiest day of her life with the man standing next to her.

It’s not. This is all a gig, and at the end of the day, she’s no longer the girl in the pretty dress who’s faking getting married for a magazine cover or a wedding convention. Instead, she’s the girl who probably never wants to get married.

Little does she know, she already is.

Rating: mature

a/n: I know the world is crazy right now, so I hope you manage to find something, no matter how big or small, that brings you joy 💚

ao3: beginning | current

Tumblr: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

-/-

Damn.

Her neck is killing her. There’s definitely a crick or a pull or something there that wasn’t there when she fell asleep last night and…

Emma’s eyes quickly open, taking in the plates and cups and half-eaten cake that are all sitting on her coffee table. The sun is peeking through her curtains, and the bright light blinds her enough that she’s turning and twisting her head to the solid body next to her.

The solid body next to her.

What the actual hell?

When did she fall asleep? When did Killian fall asleep? Did he spend the night here? Did she have a lot to drink last night? No, no she didn’t. There was wine, but there wasn’t a lot. Maybe two glasses which was enough to have her buzzed. She’s been careful with how much she’s had to drink because she never wants to drink too much so that everything is a hazy, gap-filled memory.

She never wants to drink enough that she can’t remember getting freaking married.

Which is exactly why she remembers everything that happened last night. She remembers sharing things she hasn’t shared in a long time, and she remembers Killian sharing about his brother and his parents and Milah.

Oh shit.

They really talked about her record and getting it expunged and possibly seeing if she could become a freaking Instagram Influencer. Her? As an Instagram Influencer? That’s ridiculous. The thought alone makes her laugh out loud, even if Killian made a good point about her using the following she does have to try to bring awareness to charities and issues and…no, that’s ridiculous.

It was her idea, but no. Just no.

But maybe she could look into working with a charity all on her own, start small, build into something when she stops being the age these boutiques and designers want for their models. She doesn’t know. It’s…she just started thinking about possibilities outside of her current line of work, and, well, trying to decide on a career path is harder than she thought she would be.

It’s a start.

Maybe.

Damn. She and Killian really covered all of the bases.

And she enjoyed it and felt comfortable, and the feeling of Killian’s hand pressing up underneath her sweater right now is warm and comfortable. It’s nice is what it is, and Emma isn’t accustomed to nice.

She’s not accustomed to any of this, even when she’s had it in the past, multiple times even. But each time it’s felt rare and slightly broken. Maybe that’s just her. Maybe she’s not made for nice and happy and comfortable.

There’s the slightest, smallest part of her that wishes maybe she could have those things, but that’s not anything she should be fooling herself with now.

Carefully, she pulls back from Killian’s shoulder and studies his face. He hasn’t shaved in a few too many days. The light spots of red and brown are coming in and overpowering the dark stubble he usually has, especially with the light shining on his face, a ray reflecting off of him so that the scar underneath his eye is accentuated and she can once again be jealous at how stupidly long his eyelashes are.

He’s beautiful. She remembers thinking on the day they met that he was hot. She couldn’t think of any other words, but now she knows that he’s beautiful.

Emma also knows that this is a dangerous game that she’s playing, and she needs to step away.

(She doesn’t know if she can.)

Right now, though, she can’t let herself stay in Killian’s embrace on her couch. She needs to be up and moving and decidedly not this close to him when he wakes up. She knows exactly what it’s like to be this close to Killian. She knows how he kisses and how it feels when he’s inside of her and...

“Okay,” Emma says to herself as she moves only for Killian to twitch beside her. She freezes, watches him fall back asleep, and then decides that she needs to officially move and to get some air.

And maybe go get her mail. It’s been a few days since she got it, and going outside to the boxes will allow her to get some air.

Yeah, mail seems like a good idea.

There’s likely mascara smudged on her cheeks and her hair is a tangled mess, and she’s sure if she runs into the snarky old woman in 3B that she’ll have something to say about Emma’s appearance. She always does, even when Emma wasn’t up late and sleeping in her makeup, but Emma doesn’t care.

She never has. People are always judging her. Her job is literally just people judging her, and she doesn’t give a shit anymore. People have been telling her who she is for her entire life, and she’s not putting up with that anymore.

Maybe the wine from last night is still lingering.

Emma takes the stairs down to the lobby, wishing she was in something other than a pair of slippers with horrible gripping, and pushes out the side doors of the building until she’s in the courtyard where the mailboxes are. There’s no one around except for someone walking their dog, and Emma turns her face until she’s at the mailboxes and turning her key.

“Bill, bill, junk,” she mutters shifting through everything, “Boston Probate and Family Court. What is that – oh shit.”

Her throat constricts, and suddenly Emma can’t feel herself breathing. She knows that she is, that she hasn’t dropped dead yet, and her heartbeat is so damn loud that it sounds like drums are playing inside of her head.

This is it. This is what she’s been waiting months for, and she forgot about it.

How did she forget about this when she has seen Killian almost daily for a month and a half? How did she forget about this when it’s a constant joke among her friends and…how did she forget?

This is all she’s wanted, and it’s still what she wants. It’s just – she doesn’t know what has this pit forming in her stomach.

Sighing, Emma opens up the envelope and reads over the papers. She doesn’t understand what most of it means, but she understands the gist of it all.

She’s no longer married, and in the eyes of the law, she never was.

Good. That’s really good.

There’s a bang of a door, and Emma startles only to see the snippy old woman from 3B walking out toward the mailbox. Shit. She is not in the mood today, and she will punch her in the face if she says something about Emma’s appearance. Quickly, she slams her box shut, turns the key, and then practically sprints across the courtyard until she’s back inside and quickly walking up the stairs until she’s back in her apartment and completely out of breath.

For the two minutes that it took her to get back to her apartment, she forgot. She forgot the papers in her hands and the implications behind them, and why the hell would Killian stay now if he has no reason to?

When did she start wanting him to stay? For real and not simply as some thought in the back of her mind.

But she does want that.

And he’s not going to stay.

Why would he?

“Emma, sweetheart, I’ve got to – wait, what’s wrong?” he asks, his voice throaty and coated with sleep. She likes the sound of it like that. She wishes she could hear it like that more.

She can’t.

Emma blinks up at Killian, at the incredible, stupid blue of his eyes and the way he has pillow creases on his cheeks and how is hair is still mussed. She hasn’t realized that he’d moved from the couch or that he’d gotten so close to her. He’s staring down at her, his lips parted, and it would be so easy to press up on her toes and move her lips against his, to feel the overgrown scruff and to…

“N-nothing,” she stutters, backing up to the door, and shaking herself out of her thoughts. Her stupid, stupid thoughts. “It’s just that, um, I went and got my mail because I hadn’t in a few days and our annulment papers came in. We’re officially no longer married.”

Both of his brows shoot to his hairline. “What now?”

“These are our annulment papers. They came through and got approved, so, you know, that’s a good thing, I guess.”

“That’s…well, that’s bloody brilliant, Swan.” And then, before she has a moment to breathe, Killian is reaching forward and embracing her. He’s as warm as he was this morning when she woke up, and Emma wants to stay here forever. It’s safe and calm and she won’t be assaulted by all of the thoughts that are coming at her faster than she can swat them away. “You’re undoubtedly the best wife I’ve ever had, but I can’t say I’m not bloody relieved. Should we celebrate?”

Emma’s arms wrap tighter around his waist, hoping he doesn’t realize even as his nose buries itself in her neck. It may be the only cold thing about him.

“I don’t know.”

“Do you want to celebrate?”

“I don’t know.”

Killian laughs and pulls back from her until he’s tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. He’s about to say something, and she doesn’t know what it’s going to be. But there’s this swirling in her stomach and tightness of her throat as she stands and waits for what’s about to happen.

“I have to go,” he suddenly blurts out. “I-I apologize, love, but I have to go. I’ll text you later.”

“Oh, yeah, I – ”

“Later, Swan,” he quickly says, stepping away from her and around her until he’s opening the front door and leaving her apartment in the blink of an eye.

And just like that she’s left in her apartment with nothing but the remnants of her birthday party remaining.

The flowers Killian brought her on her kitchen counter included.

What the hell just happened?

Where did Killian go?

These aren’t really questions she wants answers to, and needing a distraction, she decides that she needs to clean. This place is a mess and is full of the mess from yesterday, and she doesn’t want that anymore. She wants clean and organized and everything she’s usually not.

She needs all of that.

Killian hurried off and left, and that’s that. It doesn’t matter to her. It’s not like he was supposed to stay around all morning and eat breakfast. That would be too much for her, for both of them, and really, they’re no longer married and there was no need for him to stay.

What there is a need is for her to vacuum her rug and to throw away these plates and to possibly go grocery shopping for fruit and vegetables and everything that is the exact opposite of birthday cake.

Damn, that icing was good.

Within two hours, Emma’s apartment is spotless. It’s cleaner than it’s been since she first moved in, and maybe Mary Margaret has a point about cleaning a little every day so that things don’t pile up. Then again, Mary Margaret is an obsessive cleaner, which has only gotten worse since her pregnancy. There’s got to be something in between.

Emma finishes folding a pair of her leggings and turns to her bedside dresser, pulling the drawer open only to see an envelope, its contents spilling out into the drawer. She hasn’t seen these in almost two months and really, she nearly forgot that they existed.

That seems to be happening with her a lot lately.

The pictures very clearly do exist, though.

Emma’s wearing a pair of leggings and an oversized sweater that hangs off her shoulder, a white bra peeking through underneath. Killian has on a pair of dark jeans, this old t-shirt she sees him favor all the time, and a leather jacket on top of it. If you just looked at their bodies, they’d look normal almost. This is how they dress nearly every day, but if you look a little higher, you can clearly see that Emma’s makeup is slightly smudged. It still looks great. Mary Margaret could be a professional makeup artist, and her makeup stays on for hours, but it’s definitely been through a day of work and a night of sex. The same with Emma’s hair. It’s not bad, but it’s also bushier than it usually would be, old hairspray causing extra volume. Killian’s hair is simply a mess, and she remembers running her hands through it right before the ceremony and…

Shit.

Does she remember part of that night?

No, she can’t. That would be impossible. It’s been months, and she’s never really remembered any of it. All she remembers of that day is working and the way that the wedding dress pinched her side. The vows seemed to go on forever, like she had to say them more than once, but then they were over and the reception started. She and Killian – oh shit.

After they slept together, they went down to the casino in the hotel, and Killian nearly got them kicked out because security thought he was counting cards. He wasn’t. He was just incredibly lucky and obviously a skilled card player, but then they…Emma doesn’t really know. The entire night was a haze, one that still hasn’t cleared, and Emma’s not sure what was acting for a job and what was real.

All she knows is that, no matter which memories become clear and which ones stay obscured, she is never drinking that much again.

She might want to stay out of Vegas for good measure.

Sighing, Emma starts putting the pictures back up only to stop on the last one, pulling it out. It’s she and Killian standing with that damn Elvis impersonator. Emma’s got her arms looped around Killian’s neck, holding on tightly, but he has his hands pressed against her cheeks as their mouths move over each other. She remembers how Killian kisses, remembers the tenderness mixed in with the passion, and that’s exactly what is happening here.

Or was. It’s what was happening.

Man, they were dumbasses.

Emma pulls her phone from her pocket to text Killian because she is apparently still a dumbass who likes to torture herself.

Emma Swan: Do you want to go for a run tonight?

She waits for the bubbles to pop up, for him to text back, and as she’s waiting she looks at the time. It’s eleven in the morning. He’s at the Academy training, and suddenly Emma feels like an absolute idiot for wondering why he rushed off like that and why he’s not texting her back as fast as he usually does.

He’s working. It’s fine. It’s all fine.

But then a reply never comes

And she doesn’t wait around for it all day. She doesn’t. That would be pathetic and needy, and Emma is not those two things. Her day is full of reading over contracts from Mary Margaret – something she does actually do – and going grocery shopping. She even stops by the studio and lets Mulan kick her ass at Pilates despite holding out hope that she’s still got a run to go on.

She doesn’t.

And the next morning when she goes to her usual path at the same time as always, Emma is surprised not to find Killian waiting for her. She starts running anyways, figuring he’ll catch up and join her like he always does, but then he never does. When she texts and asks him where he is, he responds hours later saying that his training has been crazy and that he simply hasn’t had time but will try to make it tomorrow.

She uses the gift card he gave her to buy her smoothie, and everything about it feels wrong.

The next day there’s a text waiting for her when she wakes up.

Killian Jones: I’m sorry, love. Training is kicking my ass, and my body needs a break. I’ve got exams all next week during our regular running time, so rain check?

“Rain check,” Emma whispers into her phone because she’s a crazy person talking to herself now.

She throws out his damn flowers only to dig them out of the trash later, the petals falling off.

Yeah, she’s definitely a crazy person now.

-/-

“Oh. My. God.”

“What?” Emma gasps, turning around to see where Mary Margaret is. “What’s wrong?”

Mary Margaret pops up from around a display shelf. She lifts a small outfit in the air. “Look at how cute this is.”

“I think your kid is a few months too young for that.” “Yes, but she can wear it when she’s, um, six to twelve months.” “You don’t even know that she’s a she.”

“Yeah, but there’s a fifty percent chance.”

Emma huffs and goes back to looking at the pair of earrings she was examining. They’ve been in this boutique for thirty minutes waiting for management to get back from a late lunch (extremely fucking late if Emma does say so), and she still hasn’t been able to figure out what exactly their specialty is. They’ve got baby clothes, dog beds, and regular, adult clothes, and those just don’t seem like things that go together.

“I thought you and David said you weren’t going spend money on anything that wasn’t necessary until you learned the gender for real.”

“But it’s so cute.” “Marg.”

“Why are you insisting on ruining all my fun? First, you didn’t want to get something to eat, then you didn’t want to stop at Edmond’s to look at that pair of boots, and now you won’t let me waste twenty dollars on this adorable outfit. Seriously, did someone pee in your Cheerios this morning?”

“That is the grossest saying. Please don’t say that. Ruby says the same awful phrase.”

“See.” Mary Margaret places the outfit back on the shelf and crosses her arms over her chest as she arches her perfectly sculpted brows. How the woman maintains her brows so well is amazing. “You’re in a bad mood. Why are you in such a bad mood?”

“I am not in a bad mood.”

“Ah, yes, because slamming earrings down and scowling is the look of someone who is in a good mood.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re a liar.”

A lying liar who lies.

“I,” Emma repeats, swallowing down every curse word she knows because Mary Margaret does not deserve that, “am fine. There’s nothing wrong with me. I’m as happy as can be.”

Mary Margaret hums and walks closer to Emma until her hand is pressing down on her shoulder. “You’ve been like this since your birthday. Did something happen?”

“Nothing happened.”

“When we left, it was just you and Killian there. Did something happen with you two? Did you sleep with him again?”

“Why would having sex with Killian put me in a bad mood?”

Mary Margaret smiles before flattening out her lips. “Maybe he’s a bad lay.”

“Killian is not a bad lay.”

“So you did sleep with him?”

“No, I didn’t sleep with him. We didn’t sleep together. We are not together. We are not fuck buddies. We’re nothing.”

She let her voice get to shrill, allowed herself to say too much, and she turns around because she doesn’t want to look at Mary Margaret anymore. Instead, she’ll look at what is either a sweater for a dog or a baby. She honestly can’t tell.

“Emma, that wall of yours may keep out pain, but it may also keep out love.”

“You know, that’s absolute shit.” Emma turns on her heels and looks at Mary Margaret as her body thrums. “I have been in love before. Multiple times, actually, and I’ve gotten screwed over every time. Maybe some of it was my fault. Hell, I know it was my fault with Graham, but I am not the way I am for some unknown reason. And I’m tired of people calling me prickly for not falling into the open arms of every man who shows even the slightest bit of interest in me. Having feelings for someone isn’t simple. It’s terrifying, and I wish someone could understand that for just one minute instead of crucifying me for not automatically being open to it.” “Emma, I – ”

She waves Mary Margaret away. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have. I – ”

“No, you’re right. Of course you’re right, and I feel so stupid for not realizing it. I know what you’ve gone through. I mean, I didn’t experience it, so I can’t know how you felt. But you’re not me. You’re not Ruby or Mulan or even David. You’re you, and if you say that something scares you, it does. Love is scary.”

Emma nods her head as she swallows down the lump in her throat. She’s got this great group of people around her, but sometimes it’s still hard for her to know that people love her. it’s hard for her to feel like she’s being listened to and understood and not judged. The only person who she’s ever felt like truly listened has been Killian.

Killian, who she is prickly to but who would never say so.

Killian, who seems to have dropped off the face of the earth in the past two weeks.

Killian, who she misses despite telling herself not to.

“And you’re not prickly,” Mary Margaret continues. “You’re lovely, and I love you.”

Emma steps forward until her arms are wrapping around Mary Margaret’s and she’s feeling her embrace move over every inch of her. “I love you, too. I’ll try not to lose my mind in a shop when we’re waiting for a meeting again.”

“They’re forty-five minutes late. I say we both lose our minds.”

“You want to leave?”

“Hell yeah. They weren’t paying you well anyway.”

They end up going to get food and going shoe shopping like Emma wouldn’t agree to earlier, and it’s a little past seven by the time Emma gets home. It’s cold outside, the November wind whipping around, but Emma’s feeling energized and like she needs to go on a run. She hasn’t gone in a few days, and she needs the adrenaline high.

She’s craving it.

Her feet hit the pavement outside of her apartment, shocks running through her body, and she manages to dodge all of the pedestrians that are clogging up the pavement with their grocery bags and backpacks and their inability to walk in a straight line. She doesn’t usually like running through the city. It’s congested and unpleasant, but before she can stop herself, she knows exactly where she’s running.

Where she’s running to.

His apartment isn’t necessarily close to hers. It’s further than anyone should run, but she’s never been one to shy away from a challenge.

(Okay, she is, but not today.)

For the briefest of moments, Emma nearly stops herself from knocking on his door, but the adrenaline is running high. She’s damn tired of dancing around and doubting herself. She’s likely about to make herself miserable, but then Killian is opening the door and standing in front of her in nothing but a pair of low-slung gray sweatpants.

“Swan, what are you – ”

And then she kisses him.

-/-

tag list: @xemmaloveskillianx @therealstartraveller776 @stahlop @shardminds @carpedzem @captainsjedi @galaxyzxstark @thejollyroger-writer @kmomof4 @tiganasummertree @xellewoods @idristardis @karenfrommisthaven @shireness-says @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @a-faekindagirl @ultimiflos @jamif @dreameronarooftop15 @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @teamhook @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @superchocovian @ultraluckycatnd @cs-forlife @andiirivera @qualitycoffeethings @jonirobinson64 @mariakov81 @spartanguard @snowbellewells @onepunintendid @bluewildcatfanatic

#another kind of green #cs fic #cs ff #cs fanfic #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #captain swan fanfic #captain swan

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what-breaks-my-heart · 3 years

Text

I was tagged by @its-chelisey-stuff (WE LITERALLY JUST KNEW EACH OTHER BECAUSE OF MORE THAN FRIENDS)

1. What is the colour of your hairbrush? I don’t have a hairbrush but I have a comb 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

2. Name a food you never eat. Seafood because of allergies. I can eat fish and crabs though. Basically anything that stores sea water (apart from fish).

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? IT’S ALWAYS TOO HOT HERE. I miss the UK where I can just layer up if it gets too cold.

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? I just woke up 😂😂

5. What’s your favourite candy bar? Are there candy bars which are not chocolate???

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? Does esports count? I went to Kuala Lumpur DotA 2 Major in 2018. Otherwise, I didn’t go to any.

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? “I’m printing it!”

8. What is your favourite ice cream? Strawberry. Life is already bitter as is.

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? Tea. I just had breakfast.

10. Do you like your wallet? Indifferent.

11. What was the last thing you ate? Fried rice. Not Uncle Roger’s style because I am not Chinese.

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? Big fat nope.

13. What was the last sporting event you watched? DotA 2 online tournament. I have a team I have been supporting since I started watching it in 2015 and their game started really late last night (time zone thing)

14. What is your favourite flavor of popcorn? Just the plain one.

15. Who was the last person you sent a text message to? I texted my friend (whom I managed to make him watch his first kdrama) from school to prepare a box of tissue before watching episode 15 of More than Friends.

16. Ever been camping? Camping was an annual thing back in my primary school.

17. Do you take vitamins? I don’t go out under the sun, if that’s what you mean. But no, I don’t take supplements because I am too lazy.

18. Do you regularly attend a place of worship? Not since the pandemic.

19. Do you have a tan? At this rate, I call it sunburn. But I haven’t gone out much (apart from going to work as and when needed, groceries, and taking my car for a spin) since the pandemic so the tan line is becoming fader.

20. Do you prefer chinese or pizza? Pineapple on pizza. Sue me!

21. Do you drink your soda through a straw? I pour it into a glass and drink it like a champ. But I also try to reduce single-use plastics in my daily life.

22. What colour of socks do you usually wear? Black is always the safe option (yes it tells a lot about my personality huh)

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? Yes, but only where the speed limit is stupidly too low. Otherwise, I rarely drive above 100 km/h.

24. What terrifies you? The list is too long, it should probably be a separate post. I project my issues on the shows that I watch so every now and then you would see me analysing characters or incidents while projecting my issues.

25. Look to your left, what do you see? A broken mirror (in my bedroom), just the perfect metaphor for my twisted perspectives in life.

26. What chore do you hate most? Scrubbing the toilet.

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? Please talk slowly so I can understand you (also applicable to any other languages tbh).

28. What’s your favorite soda? Carbonated lemonade.

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? I prefer hitting the Drive Thru so I can eat my food in front of my laptop in peace.

30. What’s your favourite number? 3 and its first 3 multiples

31. Who was the last person you talked to? My brother, when I passed him the printed material he asked me to print early in the morning for his chess coaching session (he’s a chess coach, yes).

32. Favourite meat? Chicken, because it’s the easiest to be eaten.

33. Last song you listened to? Late Regret by Ong Seong Wu (More than Friends OST). I even listened to the 1-hour loop on YouTube while editing my screencaps last night. And it took longer than the editing process so I also listened to the video with hangul and English lyrics afterwards. I am more comfortable with hangul than the romanisation so I guess my pathetic Korean lessons paid off.

34. Last book you read? I can’t even remember the last time I read a book. Probably mid last year?

35. Favourite day of the week? Saturday.

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? Haven’t tried 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

37. How do you like your coffee? Latte. But I am not a coffee drinker and only started drinking occasionally this year due to the amount of work I had to put in during the first half of this year (yes, even during the pandemic)

38. Favourite pair of shoes? I only have 2 pairs of shoes to even have any favourite. 1 pair for work and another for casual wear.

39. Time you normally get up? Half past 6 if I have to go to the office. Otherwise, I’ll wake up for morning prayer and continue sleeping until half an hour before I have to clock in. On weekends, I continue sleeping until closer to 10 o’clock. If I stayed up the night, probably closer to noon.

40. Which do you prefer, sunrise or sunset? Sunset all the way, because it’s the beginning of my favourite time of the day. Yes, I’m a vampire who loves the night. I also love necks

41. How many blankets on your bed? One and only. It’s too hot to wear even a thin blanket but it gets cold around 3 am so I have to be prepared.

42. Describe your kitchen plates. I like the design of Portmeirion table set from the early 2000s.

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment. It’s not photography material, but it’s not dirty or messy or anything.

44. Do you have a favourite alcoholic drink? I don’t drink.

45. Do you play cards? No. I don’t play anything that requires other people to join me (yes, I am a lone ranger).

46. What colour is your car? The Nissan partner and distributor in my country calls it Dark Metal Grey. It does look nice.

47. Can you change a tire? I can, but I wouldn’t. With free towing service, why should I bother?

48. Your favourite state or province? I was practically born and raised here so I cannot pick a favourite.

49. Favourite job you’ve had? I would say my previous job, because our team had a fantastic working relationship, and everyone was crazy enough to entertain my antics as the maknae.

tagging: @kdramastuff (I know you don’t do this stuff but I just wanna tag you :p) @becausenothingtodo @aromaticcedarwood @dramaintherain @dohyunsoo @kuronekonerochan @park-joonyoung @psalm40speakstome @myechoecho @ambedoanxiety @outside-seoul (that is 10 tags right because I only tag the first one to annoy her :ppp)

#i got tagged #tagging stuff #tagging game #tag game #I don't remember how to tag this lol #personal

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shytiff · 3 years

Text

Apr 2021 Wins

Started typing this on 4th apr lmaooo

1 - went to mcd. bought chicken + rice with the app promo. there’s a staff helping me on the order machine lol i feel badd there’s no need to do thatt. ate my lunchmade by mom at mcd’s muschola and went to sbux bcs its tumbler day. green tea latte w skim milk as usual. sent dr triya’s translation. ecmocard. started rereading goong (AGAIN. i probably have read it like 3 times minimum). still bring some feels

2 - its holiday today. spent almost the whole daylight rereading goong (turns out its pronounce ‘gung’ not ‘gong’ lol ive been wrong all this time) and finished it. the scene where they stare at each other, separated by the castle door, always gets me. got the old ipad charged (the screen are like 30% close to detaching and falling apart) and started AOT

3 - spent the whole day reading AOT. i like it when i have mini purposes in life (eg: finishing a manga series). AOT rly talks a lot about what do you want to do in life, the consequences of your choices and how you have to live with it. i felt triggered in a good way. the characters dont rly judge other’s choices, but they question them. discuss about it. give you some moral push. second gladi today. my vbg was still filpped hhhh. read aot until i felt sleepy and fell asleep. woke up very near subuh and prayed isya. my toxic trait is the horrible self care (and im talking bare minimum lol hehe lmao)

4 - finished aot. Asked irun about some aot explanations and she sent 5 paragraphs in one bubble. Slept. Flavola, kopsus coklat and somay. Also ate japota honey butter. Did 1 long input of ecmocard. Followed baepsae choreo. Moved my body a bit. Wow im not immediately sleeping. Amazing

5 - arrived at harkit 11-ish and went back about 1pm loll. super hungry when im arriving in kalideres. bought tahu colek worth 3000 (i wonder how the seller hears me through my 2 layers of mask), roti sisir and some ice cream in alfamidi. my fitlife protein powder ran out again. its my 2nd already. did some ecmocard, wasted my time after maghrib

6 - woke up late. did not have the mental strength to go to harkit so i decided to just stay home. bought sbux 1L green tea and macchiato. wasted the daylight and finally did some ecmocard in the evening,,,,

7 - off to harkit 7.30-ish pm in the rain. Took some data for ecmocard. Went to salemba to get tabung and surat bebas pustaka. Had breakfast slash lunch first, tried guudfuud (red rice, beef and omega egg). I like that the rice was not too much. Met up w ness ren and talked about isip dilemmas at sky. Afterwards went to flavola. Ordered mie rebus and roasted milk tea cause i somehow feel sooo hungry and in need of calories. It tasted so good, i was sitting in my usual seat facing the window, and the sky was a mixture of blue and grey. Brought croissant and sakura pocky at indomart. Ate the bread immediately after indomie. Went back home. Juan brought tahu gejrot that was delicious and crunchy. Internship files briefing by akis. Fell asleep

8 - woke up. Saw that dr retha was up for interview. Panicked. Thankfully it was at 12. I left home at 9:40 ish and arrived 11:50. Its a long ass way. Turns out i was interviewed with ka agassi. The doctors are so kind. They explained the gist of anesthesiology profession, and how its a choice you make, and its okay as long as you like what you do. Tried halo bowl for lunch. Sous vide chicken, rice, caesar sauce, beef bacon, and the deliciouss butter broccoli. Went back to kalideres and to starbucks. I only spent <2 hrs in there (a waste of money, i know). Bought decaf hazelnut latte (apparently the beans were kenyan something? Medium?) and butter croissant (need to cushion my stomach). Did GCP certification and sent it to the ever so kind mba Ai. Still got energy from the caffeine, did some ecmocard, read quran, read.... Toji fanfic 🤦‍♀️

9 - went to rsf w mom. We took the wrong way and had to take the long way but thank god theres still time to spare. Met dr rara. Some briefing. Went to rscm w agassi, submitted files for ijazah, went back to RSF. Girlll the cost of transport. MRT: 12K. Grab: 16-17k. Thats one way trip. Bought food at rsf canteen. Eocru briefing by the research coordinator. Ward tour w dr retha. Snacked on ovaltine provided by mba ai. Went home after maghrib by tj. Liqo along the way. Glad bersih (came late). Drank macchiato for some strength but still fell asleep quickly.i shouldnt have laid down

10 - kebakaran jenggot in the morning due to green screen positioning. Finally got the appropriate setup (after many fabric tries and cutting my mukena) at 08:30. Finished showering 08:45. Zoom was opened at 9 lmao. Somehow finished before 09:30. Zoompah w mom and dad along side me. After its ovee, some "photoshoot" w fam. At this point i was truly rly sleepy. Took of my makeup. Changed my clothes. And then racil silv dev showed up lol. I got gifts c: and then atikah came. And then i redid my makeup, this time with the help of friends to create fantastic eye make up look (which i can never pull off). Eyebrows by sil, eyeshadow and liner by cheldev lol. Took some photos. Dajen came. Talked. Videocalled w pupuy. A surprise gift from fianti came. And then chel dajen went back at 8. Still cant sleep. Slept at like 11-12

11 - lazed. Woke up, ate pizza (mom bought 2 of phd's 1m pizza) and bakwan, slept again. Matcha latte and ecmocard. Watched a bit of 2nd sinau

12 - off to rsf at 06:20. Arrived 07:15 ish. Lunch was ayam penyet accompanied by snacks that mba ai bought. Off to harkit at 14:05 (bcs my laptop somehow shut down and i lost all the unsubmitted data). And then off to kalideres at 15:30 ish to meet up w clara and search for clothes for almira's wedding. Went to lippo bcs clar saw this dress that kinda looks like the brokat given. We ate at ramen ya. It doesnt rly make you feel full, the filliny sensation was kinda like indomie. Saw that the dress looked different. Ate 1 boba pancake together at banban. Continued on to the tailor in kebon jeruk. The location was in an alley, and it was raining lol. Quoting clara: "the unnecessary struggles". The tailor was quite helpful (and she looks experienced). Arrived at clara's at 8 ish. Picked up by mom with car (it was raining) and arrived at abt 9. Hurriedly showered and tarawih and tidied up AND ITS ONLY 09:45. Its crazy how efficient one use time (and at the same time, how wasteful one can be)

13 - first day of fasting. The morning was spent taking samples. I stupidly took a sample thats not yet labeled im sorry :(((( i felt kinda tired and wanted to give up this. Give up anesthesia. Went back home at 14:00 and its cloudy. The bus was the nicer types and it was COLD. Read quran along the way. Picked up by juan. Opened laptop. And then its iftar time. I was sooo sleey and the tarawih was so long thst i closed my eyes along the way. Fianti called after tarawih, we talked til abt 21:30. And then i fell asleep

14 - went to rscm. Submitted serkom files. Met dr dyah and i hope we could somehow meet her again if we study in fkui again aamiin. Went to rsf by mrt. Arrived in lebak bulus just before it was raining. The bus took a while to arrive (usually theyre there, waiting). Its still raining like crazy so i took grabcar to AR from pesakih (39k). Played with my phone til iftar. Played phone again after tarawih and fell asleep

15 - i felt rlyy lazy and cant bring myself to wake up. Off to rsf at 07:15. There were coordinator ppl. Took sample. It was raining when i went back but i took grabbike from kalideres. Wasted my time and did not do ecmocard

16 - sampling. Snacked on keripik pisang at the room. Went back early at 13:15 ish. Picked up by juan. Sleeeept (and this is before the nightmareish mistake began)

17 - i did a mistake by telling dr retha (who took the sample today) the wrong patient (it switched in my unreliable memory. I feel terrible. Thank god shes quite chill abt it (?). Read jujutsu kaiseeen. Went to flavola. Did 1 ecmocard. Went to bandar jakarta baywalk by motorbike. Spent 135k and was quite full with many varieties. Arrived home at about 20:50. Turns out juan also had bukber with his friends. Phone call with fiiii, talked abt dimrob

18 - lazed all day, read jjk, finished my part of ecmocard (gave genky to ekal cause i was a dumbass at getting data). Ate mom's mentai rice, siomay. Drank green tea latte. Read jjk til 145 (mentok) at night. Proceeds to consume all things jjk lmaoo

19 - we took sooo long to get samples. Finished at 13:00. Went to rm with dr rara. Went back home. Watched the third sinau. Read the IMMACULATE jjk fics by celestialmechanics im IN LOVEEEE with the way s/he writes ughhhh

20 - samples took faster than usual. Mba ai did not came today. Went to RM and did some work there. Off to AR by 15:00. Arrived close to maghrib. Did not do any work afterwards lmao. Did not even wash my face

21 - magang as usual. Note to self: sit on the right side of the bus. Did nothing yesterday. Felt like shit after tarawih (but i showered before maghrib!!)

22 - todays problem was the swab sample not being there even though the staff allegedly already took it. Huft. Took a shower and out on vitacid (i cant remember the kast time i put on vitacid 😳 its probably been... a week or two?

23 - samples finished quite quickly. Already going home at 12. Lazedddd and lazed and lazed. Waited for emir to pick me up so i went to dm. Read an immaculate itadori x megumi fix thats just full of feels. Started demon slayer lets see

24 - literally just laid in bed reading manga and seeing tiktok and slept again and suddenly its 1 am. Showered. Still in a lazy mode. Havent begun clires work. Watched leah's vlog that said "go do things youve been putting off!". Finally finished the third and last video of Sinau Yuk ICU class with dr. Zeta, SpAn lolll even though the actual last class was on 7th apr. iftar was fish and chips and salad yuum

25 - woke up at like 1am since i slept too much yesterday. Ate tan ek tjoan bread and drank sbux matcha latte. Did some intern work. Read a bit of quran. Sahur. Cant even sleep again so i showered. Off with mom and dad (09:30) since dad’s going to get vaccinated at skk migas. Mom drove me to ara’s place (11:00). Talked a bit and even read quran again there. Off to GI (13:00) to meet up w regen. Walked around. Bought a discounted TBS green tea facial wash. Went back home by TJ (16:00). the bus station is a bit closer now. Arrived home close to maghrib (17:30). hurriedly showered and went to sleep (properly) after tarawih. A good good sleep since i got 9400 steps today and that tired me out lmaooo (bare minimum yall, i know).

26 - woke up still sleepy. Slept again after iftar and woke up at 07:30. Skipped shower and off to RSF lmao. Went to medical record. Walked to the front of RSF originally planning to go to lebak bulus by angkot but i saw none. So i went through mrt instead. Stopped by at kebon jeruk and walked 800 meter (that tireeed me and made me feel parched under the sun) to risma busana for clothes fitting. Took gojek to jembatan gantung (turns out the closer halte to flyover was taman kota). Iftar was chicken noodle and risol and banana and i felt fullll and i slept

27 - today is off day since im alternating with agassi. read quran. watched shadow and bone (with 1,5x speed except for kanej and matthias nina scenes). didnt rly do any magang work except the table asked by dr retha. i feel like usually im operating on 70%. sleeping more doesnt rly add that. i need caffeine or physical activity. before i know it, its close to iftar.

28 - i ((felt)) like i had a decent amount of energy today. shouldve done some work between sahur and leaving the house but i ended up reading vampire knight lmaoooo the scenes had no business bringing so much butterflies. sampling together w agassi. mba ai didnt come in today. after agassi left did some magang work. i also went to RM to ask for more RM to bu dian. took angkot to lebak bulus for the first time. paid 5k. i had no idea which angkot went to lebak bulus and the driver (somehow knowing the right words to say) said “lebak bulus lebak bulus”. didnt read much quran on the way back. i just close my eyes and relaxed. felt kinda low on sugar. watched more shadow and bone on the way back and at home until close to iftar. didnt do anything after tarawih. slept hoping i woke up early (which i did, at 3am. but i slept again)

29 - im supposed to have ample energy but i just stuck around my bed until its time to get ready to go. read some kanej fic lol. I dont rly do anything productive after arriving home

30 - made intern log, magang as usual. Did not go to rm. Finished watching shadow and bone. Rested bcs tomorrow's saturdayyy

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epicstuckyficrecs · 5 years

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Weekly Recap | September 2-8

It seems this week’s rec is making up for the short one I had last week XD Enjoy!

PS: if you’re a writer/fanartist and I’ve tagged you on Tumblr, but not Twitter (or vice versa), and you have an account on both platforms, please let me know! It’s probably because I don’t know your username(s) on every platform.

Complete

This Bucky with This Steve by debwalsh/ @debwalsh (Actors AU | 1,8K | Not rated): Ascendant star Bucky with washed up but hoping for a comeback Steve...

💙 The Barnes Exotic Animal Rescue (for Magical Creatures) by Deisderium/ @deisderium (Shrunkyclunks, witch Bucky | 5,6K | General): In which Steve Rogers stumbles across the Barnes Exotic Animal Rescue for Magical Creatures, meets a witch named Bucky, accidentally adopts a unicorn, and never wants to leave.

💙 You be yours and I'll be mine by verzacefatale/ @verzacefatale (Post-CW |13K | Explicit): “Oh, god. We got married, didn’t we?” Steve sounds like he’s trying not to panic. “Seems that way,” Bucky says, before he bursts out laughing at the bewildered look on Steve’s face. “Come on, pal. It’s not the end of the world.”

Keep Me by dixons_mama (Evanstan RPF | 1,6K | Explicit): After working endlessly on interviews for Disney, filming 355, and now attending GQ's Men of the Year event, Sebastian is tired down to his bones. Yet, he he finds himself wanting to just be near Chris.

A Pal in the Hand is Worth Two in the Jacuzzi by dixons_mama (PWP | 1,7K | Explicit): Bucky asks for Steve's help getting off, being the good friend (that's also stupidly in love) he is, Steve obliges.

Quicksand's Got No Sense of Humor by paperstorm (Canon | 2,6K | Teen): And Steve will be okay, because he doesn’t have any other option. It’s only a million tiny cuts all over his body, his heart, his soul, slowly bleeding him dry. How could be not be okay, when Bucky’s been through so much worse. (💙 Part 1 of Under the Dome)

Through the Monsoon by paperstorm/ @paper-storm (Post-CW | 3,1K | Mature): Steve’s expression is blank, empty, except for his eyes. A hardened, cold, unfeeling look is in his eyes, as they stare unseeing into the space in front of him. Bucky knows how this goes. It isn’t a regular occurrence, it's only happened a few times in the last half-year, but it isn’t good. Steve is an expert at shaking things off – which is either fortunate or unfortunate, depending on who’s asked about it – so when he can’t, it means things went really wrong. (💙 Part 3 of Under the Dome)

A Lifetime is Never Enough by paperstorm/ @paper-storm (Post-CW | 3K | Mature): Bucky reaches for him with his hand, eyes still closed, and Steve curls up against his side. Bucky’s arm goes around him, fingers sliding up to tangle in Steve’s hair. The sleep-warmed skin of his neck is a heavenly place for Steve to rest his forehead, tension going out of his limbs and greedily breathing in Bucky’s smell, his warmth, the safety his bed offers. (💙 Part 4 of Under the Dome)

Chasing The Light by paperstorm/ @paper-storm (Endgame fix-it | 7K | Mature): “The thing about you and me?” Bucky says, "is that the world isn’t as stubborn as we are. You’re right, I can’t promise it won’t separate us again. But I can promise we’ll find each other again if it does. Because we always do.” (💙 Part 5 of Under the Dome)

like rum on a fire by mcwho (PWP | 1,4K | Explicit): “You’re the one who wanted to see how far I could push you. You know how I like to follow orders, Buck,” Steve tells him, teasing drawl to his voice because Steve Rogers has never followed a goddamn order in his goddamn life up ‘til right about now.

Flaws by dixons_mama (PWP | 1,3K | Explicit): Steve catches Bucky scrutinizing his body, and while trying to reassure him, feels and smut ensue.

Recompense by debwalsh/ @debwalsh (Endgame fix-it | 2K | Not rated): When Steve Rogers travels to Vormir to return the Soul Stone, he’s greeted with an unexpected choice that will change his life.

Warmth by debwalsh/ @debwalsh (Modern AU | 5,3K | Mature): When Bucky Barnes receives the report that there is a guy lost on his mountain, he’s not prepared for the complications that ensue.

Wheels by debwalsh/ @debwalsh (Modern AU | 2,3K | Not rated): Teacher Steve Rogers is ready to settle into a lounger and enjoy his neighbor Natasha’s pool when he finds himself staring at the most beautiful man he’d ever seen already lounging with intent.

Won’t You Be My Neighbor? by debwalsh/ @debwalsh (Shrunkyclunks | 1,6K | Teen): Steve moves into an apartment with a Captain America impersonator, and Bucky is the building super, and gets them mixed up.

💙 it takes a lot to know a man by kittyandmulder, steebadore (Modern AU |39K | Explicit): Bucky flips to the next page, and the world around him grinds to a halt as his brain struggles to process what he's seeing. The noise of the train fades and static fills the inside of his head as he looks down at the sketches of the metal-armed guy without the mask. It's—that's him. It's Bucky's own goddamn face staring back at him from this stranger's sketchbook."What the fuck."

Double Trouble by HeroicPinups, kittyandmulder/ @kittyandmulder (PWP, Steve/Bucky/Steve | 2,7K | Explicit): Bucky finds himself stuck in a super soldier sandwich. How unfortunate.

💙 time on my hands (could be time spent with you) by thedoubteriswise/ @thedoubteriswise (Post-CW | 23K | Mature): There’s no reason to be nervous. Steve’s just going to go see his best friend. This is Bucky, for God's sake, what could there possibly be to be nervous about? It's only been a little over a month since Bucky went under. He'd practically seen him yesterday.

Reading in progress

💙 Servitum by justanotherStonyfan/ @justanotherstonyfan (canon-divergent, Shrunkyclunks | 43K | Explicit): Steve's affection can be huge, almost palpable. His desire to take care of James can be overwhelming. But James can't think of a point so far where Steve's been overwhelming that he hasn't enjoyed immensely - and if they can roleplay some lifelong memories out of a spanking session, a shibari tutorial, and a carefully lit table, he's pretty sure providing Steve with the opportunity to do something he may not even be aware of wanting should go down a treat, and make for a pretty awesome afternoon. ( 💙Part 28 of the Honey Honey series)

WIP

💙 Cakes & Balances by mambo/ @whtaft (POTUS Steve | 16K | 8/? | Teen): It’s kind of hard to date the cute baker from down the street when you’re the President of the United States of America. But Steve Rogers will make it work.

oh the glory of it all by hitlikehammers (Post-Endgame | 4K | 1/23 | Mature): They end up stumbling almost unexpectedly into the white-picket-fence, apple-pie life they used to dream of. Except it’s not like that at all.

💙 An Escort's Guide to Navigating Tricky Work Relationships by Hopeless--Geek (wuzzy90)/ @hopelessartgeek, Mystrana/ @mystrana (Escort AU | 24K | 4/5 | Explicit): Steve is an outspoken leader of the fight for escort legalization. He wants to show the world that they have relationships just like everyone else, but hasn’t dated in the past five years because he’s been so busy with work. Bucky’s still not quite recovered from a bad relationship with a boyfriend who degraded his choice of work. And while he can define professional boundaries like it’s his job (it is), Bucky’s not great at handling his personal life. A story of navigating tricky work relationships.

💙 This Side of the Blue by notlucy/ @notlucy (Mermaid AU | 121K | 33/44 | Explicit): A trick was the only explanation for what Steve saw floating there. This figment of his childhood. This myth. This legend. Within the tank, the siren bared its teeth.

💙 Political Animals by crinklefries/ @spacerenegades, Deisderium/ @deisderium (Modern AU, politics | 29K | 4/9 | Explicit): Okay, so the real problem is that you shouldn’t fuck your arch-rival, political enemy, and the person you loathe the most in the world where you work. Or like, at least, you shouldn’t keep doing that.

Re-read

💙 straight from your heart by luninosity/ @luninosity (Stucky in Wakanda | 10K | Explicit): Steve doesn’t mean to have the orgasm. Not exactly. Not the first time, anyway.

💙 Tinder Is the Night by rohkeutta/ @rohkeutta (Modern AU, Tinder | 7K | Explicit): It’s the quality that gets him first. The profile photo looks like it's been taken with a semi-professional camera: it's sharp and remarkably unposed compared to most people on Tinder. The guy in the photo is the size of a fucking fridge but with Marilyn Monroe’s waistline, accentuated by the way he’s standing half-twisted towards the camera. He’s also in the process of getting arrested.

💙 If Only In My Dreams by odetteandodile (Modern AU | 28K | Teen): Bucky is a highly successful cooking and lifestyle blogger, the gay New England Pioneer Woman if you will. He writes all about life in his Connecticut home with his D.H. (darling husband). Only problem? It’s all complete fiction. When his agent Sam informs him that he's been offered an exclusive sponsorship deal with Stark Media and a three book contract to go with it, Bucky's forced to fess up to Sam, who's predictably...displeased. But Sam's also convinced the deal is too good to miss—even if they have to put on a little bit of a show in order to get it. So Tony and Pepper descend on Bucky and Sam's fake home for Christmas with a devastatingly handsome War Hero in tow, and their already complicated plan quickly gets even more complicated as Bucky finds himself falling head over heels for Steve. Can he keep it together just for the holidays? Did he ever have it together in the first place?

💙 took my love, took it down by LaughsAtThunder (Post-WS | 31K | Explicit): The problem, Bucky thinks now that he has most of his memories back, is that his whole entire world has always revolved around Steve Rogers. Steve has been always been half of Bucky’s identity. Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers’ best friend. Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers’ wingman. Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers’ teammate. And now, well, now Steve had other people to fill those positions. And of course, of course he’d always been a little bit in love with Steve. So when he overhears Steve telling Natasha that he’s finally found someone he’d like to date, someone with similar life experience, Bucky clings blindly to the hope that maybe, just maybe, Steve is talking about him.

💙 Sex, Drugs, & Needles by OhCaptainMyCaptain/ @ohcaptainmycaptain1918 (Modern AU, tattoo artist Bucky | 38K | Explicit): Bucky's a bit of a masochist in that sense – needles and the buzz of a tattoo gun have always turned him on... It’s even worse that this client is what they call a ‘needle virgin’. Doesn’t appear to have a piercing anywhere on him, and he’s already made it clear that he has no prior ink. Bucky’s always found something inherently sexy about being the first person to introduce another to that experience. He has absolutely no problem popping this guy's needle cherry.

#stucky #stucky fic #stucky fanfic #stucky fanfiction #stucky fic rec #weekly recap

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your-high-lady · 5 years

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Realisation

Summary: This story is about Feyre. She has a couple of small dreams she wants to achieve but turns out it isn’t as easy as she imagined it would. Trust me, the story is better than the summary. Modern AU. Feysand.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7

Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Sarah J Mass.

Chapter 17: Love Is So Beautiful

Feyre's POV

Two weeks had passed since my sisters left for Dunedin. Rhys and I were driving home, finished with the errands we'd been running.

"So, Feyre," I looked up at him, surprised to hear a tremor of nervousness in his voice.

I frowned. "Yes?"

"I have a question."

"I figured," I said, wryly.

He gave me a shy, amused smile. "I was just wondering…did you want to come over for the weekend?"

My eyebrows raised. "Like, stay the night at your house?"

"Well, I was thinking the whole weekend, but if you only want to stay one night, that's fine, too." He said, glancing between the road and me. I just stared at him.

I'd been over plenty of times for studying or just hanging out, but I'd never stayed. Had never had the courage to. Until now. After months of just being smitten over Rhys and enjoying all my time with him and his friends, I felt confident that I was safe at his house.

But he was asking me to stay the night. Alone. In his house. The idea and was appealing and daunting at the same time. I hadn't ever imagined staying over at his house, but now the idea seemed so perfect.

"Where would I sleep?" I couldn't think anything better to stay.

"I would like to sleep together in my bed, but if you're not comfortable I could move into the lounge?" He said, and I couldn't help but love him a little more at that moment. He was always thinking about me.

When I didn't speak for a minute, just stared at him lips parted, he quietly said, "Feyre?"

I blinked. Took a deep breath. "I want to sleep in the same bed as you."

His head jerked around, eyes wide. "Really?" He asked, clearly astonished at my answer. I nodded. He smiled, wild and carefree, his perfectly white teeth shining. "Okay. You'll need clothes to sleep in and clothes for the next day. Obviously." His voice was animated. I was glad to see that a simple yes to sleep in his bed with him could make him so happy. If just sleeping together made him so happy, how happy would other things make him…? And then he suddenly said, breaking me out of my thoughts, "Oh and you'll also need something fancy. I have a thing planned for you." A cheeky smile was on his face. My eyes narrowed, wondering what this thing could be. "I don't suppose you'll tell me why?" He shook his head, grinning. The disappointment at his response was quickly replaced with love. If keeping this secret made him so happy, I wouldn't take it away from him. I would do everything in my power to keep that smile on his face. "How fancy?" I asked.

He smirked. "Date-night fancy."

A couple of days later, I found myself loading my bags into Rhys's. It was a beautiful Saturday morning and I made sure to shout a bye to Mor before hopping into his car. As we drove, he said, "So, I was planning to first drop off all your bags at my house before maybe hanging out around Shoreline Lake Park. Get lunch there, maybe for a walk on one the tracks?"

I nodded. "That's fine with me." Anything was fine if I could do it with him.

An hour later, I found myself having brunch in a cafe, looking out to the sea. Rhys sat across from me, and I was picking on a blueberry muffin which I had ordered to eat while I waited for the actual food. We talked the whole time until suddenly he went silent. I was cleaning up the last dregs of my muffins, trying to get every little bit, and as I looked up at him, I happened to have my index finger between my lips. He smirked, eyebrows lifting slightly and I yanked my finger out, blushing slightly. "What?" I snapped at him, embarrassed and wiping my hands with a napkin.

"Nothing, nothing." He said, chuckling. "You're just…" His pupils widened the smallest bit. "You're cute." My eyes narrowed. "I want to lick you. All of you." He finished. I just stared at him, biting my lip to stop myself from gaping and squeezing my legs a little. The cocky twist of his lips told me he noticed. Damn.

Thankfully our food arrived them, effectively shutting down any further comments.

The rest of the day went much like that. Rhys continued to tease me and I was able to get in a few jabs back at him too, making me very proud of myself. Around four in the evening, we headed back to his home in Palo Alto. Even now, after I'd already seen it latest five times, it stunned me.

His one-story home had a grand total of four bedrooms, two bathrooms, a kitchen, a lounge area and a "gaming" room, as he liked to call it. On the outside it had light brown bricks, a small staircase leading up to the front door, a brown garage door darker than the bricks and a grey roof. The front lawn was pretty, small shrubs lining around the edges, and it always seemed to be at its peek condition. I didn't know if he tended to it himself or someone did it for him. Inside was a small corridor lit by mini LED lights and an antique-looking round mirror hanging on the wall at the end. The first time here, he'd told me the mirror belonged to his mother, one her few prized possessions. He'd kept it there, not to remind himself of her death but the joy he often used to see in her face when she was looking at it, remembering her own parents.

A single door on the right led to the garage, and the left side opened up into the lounge area where all the guests sat. On the right was the kitchen and the dining table in front of it.

Another corridor at the back of the kitchen led into the bedrooms, bathrooms and the second lounge area which Rhys used to play x-box, watch tv and just hang out with his friends. The interior of his house also had the brown themes going on with white rolled into it.

I loved it. The first time I'd walked in, it had instantly felt like home. Warm and safe.

Today, we played some x-box, which he had taught me how to play the second time I came around, card games like Go Fish, Snap and Uno and then watched a Marvel movie. Around seven, I told Rhys I was going to take a shower and then unexpectedly, he told me to change into the fancy dress I'd brought with me, and not to come out into the kitchen until he told me I could. "Why though?" I questioned his strange instructions, but he just replied with, "It's time for your surprise."

In the bathroom, I quickly washed myself and my hair. While changing into my dress, I started smelling coffee coming through the door. It was a nice smell if a little strong. On my way out of the shower, I noticed the end of the corridor leading into the kitchen area looked like it was glowing red and orange as if the sun was setting right here in Rhys's house. I called out to him, taking a couple of unsure steps. "Wait! Stay where you are, don't move and close your eyes." He shouted back. I frowned but obliged, curious despite myself about where this was going.

A few seconds later, I heard him gasp and instinctively opened my eyes. There he was, standing at the end of the corridor, mouth slightly open in a silent gasp, eyes wide. When he kept staring at me, I nervously ran my hands up and down my dress, and said, "Do I look alright?"

I'd been groaning as I rummaged around my closet, occasionally throwing a piece of clothing over my shoulder. I was having difficulty finding something I was sure Rhys would like. It didn't take long for Mor to come in. "What are you groa—" She'd stopped, eyes wide open as she stood at the threshold, and looked at my room. It had gotten quite messy, what with all the clothing strewn around the room. I told her what I was looking for and she immediately dragged me to her own cupboard and found me a dress.

It was that dress I was wearing now. It was blue and white. The neck was deep, the straps coming to criss-cross across my back. Two slits ran up my legs up to just above my knees and there were another two cut-outs above my hips.

Mor had had to threaten to strangle me to get me to pack that into my bag.

I had eventually relented because I really did find the dress pretty and something told me Rhys would like it too.

And it seemed I was right.

Rhys was still staring at me so I said, "Rhys?" He blinked rapidly before bringing his eyes back up to mine. He stammered, "Fey-Feyre. You-you look very beautiful."

I smiled a little shyly, "Thanks." He shook his head like he was clearing his head, and approached me.

"Close your eyes." I did. "And don't open them." I nodded once. Flinching slightly when I felt an arm wrap itself around my waist and a warm calloused hand cover my eyes, he led me out to the kitchen. The smell of coffee got stronger and when I turned around the corner, he moved his hand down but kept his arm around my waist. I kept my eyes closed. It felt like I was looking straight at the sun with my eyes closed. It's so bright! I thought. And then he whispered in my ear to open my eyes.

My first reaction was an involuntary gasp. I couldn't help it. The blinds were closed, lights off. Everywhere candles of all shapes and sizes were lit. On the tables, couch armrests, beside the vases, next to a lamp, on the dining table, on the ground in the edges and around corners. Everywhere. Coming from the two biggest ones was the scent of coffee.

The dinner table was set for two: fancy plates, cutlery, glasses, all the jazz there. Small portions of different dishes were laid out. I noticed they were all my favourites: croissants, butter chicken, cheese pizza and my most beloved, cheeseburgers. In a large jug, he had some grape punch if the dark purple colour was any indication. I loved all these foods and especially the punch and burgers, but half of them, I'd never even told Rhys I liked them. So stupidly, all I said was, "How do you know I love butter chicken? Croissants? Never once have I told you that."

Though I couldn't see him, I knew he was smirking, eyebrows raised. "No thank you's, when did you do this, how did you do this? Straight up. How do I know you like butter chicken and croissants?" I blushed but said nothing. He sighed. "I asked your sisters. I've wanted to do something like this for a while now. Just didn't know when." My heart stuttered.

Two weeks. For two weeks, he had been planning this.

Two weeks.

"Why?" I whispered.

"Feyre?" He said.

"Why? Why did you do this?" I said in a louder, more clear voice.

He was silent for a couple of seconds before coming to stand in front of me. I slowly raised my chin and looked into his eyes. He smiled. "Why not? I love you." My heart stuttered. He'd never said that before. "I love you so much." He chuckled lightly, eyes wide as if he couldn't believe his won words." Sometimes I feel like I'll die from just how much I love you. I love you so much, it hurts. It's the least I could do." He looked down. I put my hands on his cheeks, cupping them, and kissed him.

"Thank you," I said, pulling away and leaning my forehead against his. "I want you to know…" I paused, hesitating a little. "I want you to know that I love you." His lower lip trembled and a tear trickled down his cheek. I wiped it away with gentle fingers as I said, "I want you to know that I am broken and healing, but every piece of my heart belongs to you. And I am honoured—honoured to be by your side." I wrapped a hand around his neck and brought his lips to mine. His hands came up to rest on my waist and we lost ourselves in each other for a few minutes before he pulled away and gasped, "Dinner's getting cold."

That night, I was the bathroom, getting ready for bed. I looked into the mirror and saw someone so different from who I'd been in January. It was like we were two different people. Then, my face had been gaunt and dark. My eyes were drawn and dark circles were prominent on my face. My lips curved downwards. I hadn't smiled in forever. I couldn't remember the last time I'd laughed. And now, it looked like my eyes were practically glowing. Everything was glowing. My eyes, my skin. Even the way I talked had changed since then. Before it had been boring, bland. Now, it was like I was basking in starlight. My voice sounded lilting and soft. My lips seemed to permanently turn upwards. The dark circles were no longer there. All the pimples and blemishes had disappeared.

But no, they hadn't. There was an acne scar right there, just peeking through my hairline and another one on my nostril. They were all there. And yet, I was beautiful. I felt beautiful. I knew I was beautiful and I owned it. In the mirror, I watched as a smile light up my face. I was beautiful and nobody could tell me anything different.

AN: Love yourself, guys.

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marshmallow-phd · 5 years

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Memories Past

Part of The Untamed - EXO Wolf Universe

Genre: Supernatural, Wolf Au

Pairing: Kris x Reader

Summary: The last thing Kris wanted was to move on. He was perfectly content wallowing in his misery while pretending everything was okay. But when you come walking into his shop with a broken down car, he realizes the thing he’d been avoiding the most just might be the cure he always needed. He just couldn’t believe that it’d been you all along. Kris had been your best friend when you were kids before he’d moved away without a word of goodbye. Now nearly fifteen years later, you run into him again by pure coincidence. The memories come rushing back to you, stirring something inside. A childhood crush shouldn’t upend your picture perfect life, but sometimes, destiny has other things in mind…

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11 I 12 I 13 I Final

“(Y/n), listen to me, please!” Kris had to hold himself back from breaking down the door completely in his desperate attempt to get you to understand. He realized he’d gone about explaining what he was in the wrong way, the wrong order, but you couldn’t just end it. Not like this.

When you refused to even acknowledge his attempts to talk to you, to get you to let him back in so he could explain all of this properly, he stop hitting his fists against the wooden barrier that kept the two of you apart.

Kris stood there, just staring at your door as if by some miracle it would swing open again on its own accord and you’d run into his arms, begging him not to go. But all that came to him were the soft efforts you took to hold back the tears.

You needed time. And as much as the wolf in his chest pawed and clawed at him to break down the door, he knew the best thing for him to do in the moment was to walk away. Maybe after a little while, with you left to figure things out on your own, you’d let him sit down and explain everything to you.

With one last look at your bedroom door, Kris turned and left your apartment.

Every fiber in every muscle of his inhuman being was screaming, fighting to turn back around to you. But Kris controlled himself, getting into his car that was parked out in the street. He had to keep going. He had to give you to time to process what he’d stupidly dumped on you.

Why didn’t he tell you everything before things went this far? Why didn’t he tell you that night under the stars? Or the morning you woke up in his bed at the farmhouse? Those times would have been better. He could have eased into it. Told you about his true nature before dropping the “mate” bomb. Made it seem more like a natural transition rather than an inevitability that he pulled you into.

Barely able to concentrate, Kris sped down the darkened road, needing to put as much distance between the two of you as possible to help quiet the urge to turn back. It didn’t die, but the farther he got, the more he was able to rationalize not pulling a U-turn. As he reached the back road that would lead him to the farmhouse where he could hole himself up for a few days, a sharp pain like a hundred needles stabbed at his heart.

With a yank of the wheel, Kris pulled off to the side of the road, shoving the gear shift in park with a whine from the engine. Clutching his chest, he bent over to try and breathe easier as the pain continued. He knew exactly what this was and it wasn’t good.

“No,” he huffed, the fingernails of his other hand digging into the leather of the passenger’s seat. “It’s not supposed to come on this fast.”

Was it because he was an alpha? Or was it because you so clearly told him that you never wanted to see him again, making the rejection even more apparent?

Seeing Chanyeol in a similar state last winter had scared the hell of Kris, even though he’d put on a good show. He’d tried to be a rock and a sense of encouragement for his brother who was so clearly not okay. It was a whole different story now that he was suddenly forced into that position now.

The physical pain a wolf’s body goes through when rejected by their mate was at an intensity that couldn’t be described with any known injury or torture device. White hot irons could come close, but Kris wouldn’t give those searing rods that much credit. It’s origin was deep within the wolf, coming from nowhere without any warning and no known cure except for the one person who caused it in the first place.

Tap, tap, tap.

Kris jumped at the sudden and unexpected intrusion. Jimmy was somehow waving at him on the other side of the window on the driver’s side, smiling with a little hint of worry in his eyes. How the hell-

Rolling down the window, Kris growled, “Jimmy, what the hell are you doing here?”

“I was on my way back from the races and saw you parked on the side of the road,” Jimmy explained with a lopsided smile. “You all right? It’s like one in morning.”

Kris grunted as he straightened up. “I’m fine. Just headed home.”

Jimmy rubbed a hand over his bald head. “You sure? Anything I can do?”

“I said I’m fine, Jimmy!” Regret hit Kris instantly when he saw how his friend flinched at the harsh reply. He ran a hand through his hair before dropping it down on the steering wheel. “Thanks, man, but really, I’ll be okay. I just need to get home and get some sleep.”

“Okay.” Jimmy tapped his fingers on the door before waving. “I’ll see you later. Don’t forget to call if you need anything.”

“Sure, man,” Kris nodded, pulling the gear shift into drive. “See you later.”

Careful not hit the person who was just trying to help, Kris sped down the road while going at least twenty over. The stabbing pain had subsided, but not Kris’ panic. If your rejection cause the chain reaction with his wolf to come on that fast, how much longer did he have?

Tears spilled over from one of his eyes. Kris quickly wiped it away while sniffing back more. How could he fuck it up so royally in the span of less than a few hours? He had you and then he lost you faster than his best drag time. It was taking him back to losing Jiyoon. But there was no comparison. Jiyoon was gone from this earth and you were still here, visible and touchable, yet out of sight and out of reach of his fingers.

He’d give anything to rewind time and freeze it to that perfect moment.

You’d fallen asleep before him, wrapped up in the sheets and curled up in his arms right against his chest. Your breath tickled the skin over his collar bone, warm and soothing. Kris had caressed the bumps along your spine with his fingertips, memorizing every curve and beautifully perfect imperfection that made up who you were.

It was the most at peace Kris had ever been in his life. In those few minutes before he drifted off to sleep himself, he didn’t have to worry about any outside forces coming to take you away or any past threats coming back to haunt him. He didn’t even have to worry about whether you’d accept him or not. He’d just taken that as a given and therefore taken you being in his arms for granted. For once, he’d allowed himself to just… exist. What a short lived paradise that turned out to be.

Kris didn’t even bother to pull up near the garage when he arrived at the farmhouse, screeching to a halt right in front of the porch. Junmyeon could yell at him later. He was struggling not to collapse right then and there on the grass as he all but crawled out of the car.

Just need to get into the house, he bargained with himself, just get in the house and then you can let it swallow you.

Shuffling his feet and clutching his chest, he made it up the steps and through the door, letting it slam loudly behind him.

The pain had long subsided, but the phantom feeling lingered, leaving him in fear of it flaring up again. Kris tried to keep his face neutral in case he ran into any of the others. He’d almost made it until he reached the bottom of the stairs. Tao nearly bumped into him coming down.

“Ge-ge?” Tao bent at his waist to try and get a better look at Kris, who was twisting to try and avoid showing off his red eyes and aching expression. “What happened? Where have you been?”

“It’s nothing, Tao,” Kris growled, keeping his head down. There was no way to get up the stairs without shoving the younger wolf out of the way and Tao was too sensitive to not take it personally. “I just need to get some rest.”

Tao was not going to let it go. “You look bad, Kris. Is there-”

“Just drop it!” Kris snapped, nearly snarling at his poor brother that just wanted to help. “I’m sorry,” he sighed. “I’m just tired and need to be alone right now. I’ll explain later.”

He wasn’t sure if he’d actually be up for telling anyone the scene he’d just been forced to play out, but he knew he’d have to tell his pack eventually, in case- Not now. Not in this state.

To Kris’ relief, Tao nodded and stepped out the way, watching his alpha trip up the stairs with concerned eyes.

Your tears had dried out after only a few minutes. A headache was forming behind your eyes so, with wobbly legs, you pushed yourself up to your feet and opened your door. The apartment was empty, tauntingly so. You didn’t think Kris would trick you into thinking he’d left, but then again, you didn’t really know him, did you?

Shuffling over to your medicine cabinet in the kitchen, you pulled out the bottle of aspirin and popped two into your mouth, swallowing them dry.

With the new bout of information you’d just received, you couldn’t be alone with your thoughts. You needed to talk to someone, but the first person that came to your mind was also the person you didn’t want to see right now. Or maybe ever again.

Kris was the entire reason your life had been up ended from the scenic path it’d been on. You were perfectly content before he’d shown up. You’d put the part of your life that had involved him behind you and were happy for the future that you’d been envisioning and planning on. Hell, maybe you and Huan could have even worked through and compromised on your issues if he’d never come along. That’s what normal relationships were about, weren’t they?

And yet, you never had that chance because something decided that you and Kris were a better match. And why? Because you were friends almost two decades ago? That wasn’t fair. Where was your freedom to choose who you belonged with?

An epiphany hit you as you were trying to work your way around your receding headache to make your thoughts line up coherently. There was one person in the world that you were sure knew exactly what you were going through. She’d practically said so herself.

Hesitantly, you made your way to the living room where you’d left your cell phone on the coffee table when Kris had shown up. Sitting down on the sofa, you stared at the phone, debating.

Minseok knew Kris, according to Ji Yeon. You’d even seen them in the same group that night Kris had found you on the boardwalk. Then Ji Yeon confirmed that they knew each other enough for Minseok to know that you were Kris’ engaged friend he’d talked about.

What if they didn’t just know each other? What if Minseok was like Kris? Ji Yeon talked about how she, too, was seeing someone before Minseok came into her life. What if it was because this… mate thing had happened to her too?

The memory of first meeting Ji Yeon played in your mind. She’d shown you pictures on her camera of a particularly friendly wolf, one that seemed too aware of the camera, too intelligent to be an ordinary animal. She’d practically panicked when you pointed out how the wolf seemed to be posing for her.

Unsure if you’d even be able to speak, you simply sent a text to Ji Yeon asking if she was free to come over. With how late it was in the night, you didn’t think you’d get an answer. If not, then you’d call her in the morning. After only a minute or so, however, you received a reply simply containing a yes and an additional question that inquired if you were okay. You answered with only your address and then you waited.

Ten minutes went by before the tell-tale knock came at your door. Sighing, you stood up and opened it up for Ji Yeon.

“Hey, what’s going on?” she asked as she removed her shoes and stifled a yawn. You must have woken her up, but she came anyway. For that, you were thankful.

You stood there and watched her with an empty feeling inside, mulling over where to start. Your exhausted brain decided to just go the blunt route. “Did you know about Kris?”

Ji Yeon froze in her half-bent position, giving you the exact answer you were expecting. Straightening up, she frowned at you. “What do you mean?”

“Is Minseok like Kris?” you countered instead.

There was a mild standoff as neither of you spoke, staring at each other. But you weren’t going to let it go or back track. Not this time.

“He finally told you,” Ji Yeon stated with a whisper. There was no question in her voice. The two of you knew exactly what the underlining subject was and there was no need to beat around the bush now.

You swallowed thickly. “You knew the whole time, didn’t you? What Kris was?”

She nodded. “Yes. I’ve always known what Kris is. What all of them are. But it wasn’t my place to say anything.”

“I thought you were my friend!” you snapped. Apparently, your tear ducts had refilled as new pools of water were filling your bottom lids once again as your fists curled by your side, your fingernails digging into your skin. “Shouldn’t I have a right to know why I’m suddenly not in love with my fiance anymore?”

“I couldn't tell you!” Ji Yeon shouted back. “I’m not allowed to! Only the wolf can tell his mate! That’s how it is!” Stepping up to you, she took hold of your shoulders, looking you in the eye. “Listen, (y/n). I understand what you are going through. Nearly two years ago, I was you. It’s confusing, at first. You’ll be angry for a little bit, but eventually you’ll understand why he chose to do things the way he did. They have to keep their secret and there’s no easy way to bring that subject up. The mate bond isn’t exactly something the average human goes through.”

You sniffed, hating how right she sounded. “But he still should have told me before sleeping with me.”

Ji Yeon flinched back, letting you go. “Okay. That I can’t help but agree with. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of things going in that order before.” Her eyes searched around the apartment. “Where is Kris? Did he leave to give you some space?”

Chewing on your bottom lip, you scratched at your scalp. “No…. I kind of threw him out.”

“W-what?” Ji Yeon’s mouth dropped in horror. “(y/n), what exactly did you say to him?”

Now you felt a little ashamed at what you had done in anger. You stared down at the floor. “After he told me about being… mates and how that was the reason Huan and I broke up, I told him I didn’t want to ever see him again.”

Ji Yeon practically pounced on you, squeezing your upper arms painfully. “Please, tell me you didn’t actually do that!”

“I was angry!” you yelled. “I wasn’t given a choice in my own life! What else was I supposed to do?”

“You don’t get it, (y/n),” she groaned. “If a wolf is rejected by their mate, they die!”

No.

As angry as you were, as hurt as you were and as much as you didn’t want to see Kris, you didn’t want to live in a world where he didn’t exist.

Your knees buckled under you and Ji Yeon wasn’t strong enough to keep you upright, sending you both to the hardwood floor.

Now you were really crying. To the point where breathing was nearly impossible. This was all too much. Too much to soak in, too much responsibility for you to handle.

“That’s not fair,” you croaked out as Ji Yeon rubbed your back. “I don’t get a choice at all? Why do I have to be forced to be with someone? Why do I have to be the reason they live or die? Who decided that was the right thing to do?”

“(Y/n), look at me,” Ji Yeon urged. Wiping away the tears so your vision was no longer blurry, you obeyed. A small, crooked smile was her lips. How could she be so calm right now? “All the mate bond does is bring you to the person that you would be the happiest with, the person who will protect you and love you like no one else. That’s all. Besides, do you really think that you couldn’t be happy with Kris?”

“That’s not the point,” you whimpered. “The point is that I should have the option to choose Kris. But I didn’t get that.” You sniffed, fearing the answer of your next question. “Is he already dead, then?”

Ji Yeon shook her head. “No. It doesn’t happen that fast. He has time. You have time to change your mind.”

“I feel backed into a corner,” you whispered. “I don’t know what to do. I’m still so angry. I still don’t want to see him. I don’t want that life.”

“I’ll stay with you tonight,” Ji Yeon volunteered. “I don’t think you should be alone right now. If you have anymore questions, I’ll answer them for you.”

You nodded, grateful that she offered before you had a chance to ask. But that would have to wait until morning. Right now, you just wanted to go back to sleep and shut your mind off. You couldn’t make a rational decision right now. You were too exhausted and confused. Your heart was being torn in two. You hated Kris - you hated the lies and the way you felt manipulated - but you also loved him. You just weren’t sure how real that love was.

#exo #exo fanfiction #exo fanfic #exo wolf au #exo wolf!au #exo werewolf au #exo werewolf!au #exo supernatural au #exo scenarios #exo series #kris wu x reader #kris wu #wu yifan #Memories Past #untamed wolf universe

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hardyimagines · 6 years

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Part 6 — The Baker

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

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Could I request an Alfie Solomons x reader where she has no idea who he is and thinks he’s just a baker so he bakes things for her and is sweet but he keeps trying to hide his identity bc he really likes her and eventually she finds out who he is? You decide whether you want the ending to be angst or fluff! And please make this one a bit lengthy :) thanks love 💗 Requested by: @centerhabit

Warnings: Swearing, Nightmares, Sexual Harassment ( I don’t want to upset anyone, it’s not graphic, but I just want to forewarn you! )

Word count: 9.1k

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“Cyril.” You whispered softly in annoyance, hand pressed gently into the pup’s face as he licked your cheek excitedly, attempting to wake you. “No..” You whined under your breath as sleep quickly slipped away from your grasp, do to the dog disrupting your dreams. The large animal lifted his paws on to the edge of the grey duvet before hoisting himself up and on to the oversized mattress. Cyril weighed more than you did which was quite shocking, so when the mastiff lowered himself down on top of your chest, you groaned out even louder. The room was hot, sticky hair sweeping over your pale skin as you squirmed beneath the dog to try and free yourself. His heavy paws pressed against your arms and you found yourself to be much weaker than usual. There was a dull throbbing in your temple that seemed to suffocate the entirety of your head and as you went to shout for Alfie, you found an incredible soreness in your throat. You crinkled your nose at the uncomfortable feelings before weakly patting Cyril. “Go get Alfie.” You whispered before snapping your fingers and pointing to the door. You didn’t think the dog could’ve moved faster. Cyril leapt off the bed, loud paws scratching the slippery floor before he ran, as best as he could, down the stairs and to his father who was hunched over his desk in the living room. You could hear the dog’s loud bark fill the entirety of Alfie’s home— well your home as well now. Smiling sleepily into the pillow, despite the sickness that you felt, your eyes slid shut and you let out a tired moan as you tried to get comfy. Cyril barked again and you could hear Alfie shushing the animal. “Do you want your mother to wake up?” The man growled softly, but you could hear every word in the silent home. Your ears twitched as Alfie referred to you as the pup’s mother and you were overcome with a warmth of happiness. Moving for the third time on to your back, you tried that position again, but sleep didn’t come. Another growl from Alfie did though.

Cyril was biting the end of the man’s slacks, snarling as he tried to get Alfie to follow him. “Bloody dog, what the hell is wrong with you? I’m trying to work, yeah, go lay down with your mum. Right, go.” He pointed to the stairs, expecting the dog to rush off in your direction, but Cyril merely continued to rest on the floor with his chin on Alfie’s foot, tugging lightly again at the man’s trousers. “You’ve had your breakfast, yeah, and you’ve been outside, right, what else could you fucking want?” The man, desperate to finish the work on the desk so he could climb into bed with you, stood from the creaky chair. Alfie looked to the clock in the corner, squinting. The hour hand pointed to six and he had realized he’d stayed up all night again. The sunlight was streaming in from the window in the corner of the room, but Alfie had been so caught up in paperwork, he didn’t even realize how early it actually was. His boots thudded loudly beneath him, ringed fingers scraping the railing audibly as he climbed the stairs after the dog. “Where the hell are you taking me, Cyril?”

Last week, the dog had led Alfie in circles around the home, searching for his toy ball. Alfie thought the dog had known exactly where it was and just needed help getting it, but the mutt was actually trying to look for it and Alfie had been stupidly following the animal for an hour.

Cyril nudged the door open to the bedroom that you and Alfie shared. You were laying on your back, on top of the duvet because of how hot it was in the room. “Cyril.” Alfie hissed softly, not daring to move any further. “Come on, boy, she’s sleeping. We don’t want to wake her.” Alfie pressed his hand against the doorway and tore his eyes away from the dog who rejoined your side. Cyril laid his head on your belly and you, head rolled to face the wall, pretended to be asleep so you could see how Alfie would react. As presumed, the man took a small step forward, now daring to approach you since Cyril had and it didn’t seem to bother you at all. Your eyes were still extremely heavy, but you managed to stay conscious, very aware of the approaching man. Alfie studied your form, curiously allowing his eyes to roam over your small form. You had one hand fisted in the blanket, clutching the white fabric as you slumped on top of it. Your legs were pressed together, tucked into your tummy, directed toward the wall just like your face was. Alfie stepped over one of the unpacked boxes before settling himself down at your side. You bit back your smile when the man tripped lightly over your slippers, no doubt nearly losing his already horrible balance. “Fucking shoes.” He muttered, kicking the things beneath the bed.

You began to squirm, silently telling him that he was making entirely too much noise. The man was halfway on the bed, one knee pressed into the blanket at your side, one foot still on the ground. He was just now lowering himself down and on to the mattress when you rolled toward him. Alfie held his breath, afraid to wake and upset you, though he knew you wouldn’t be mad. Your dainty fingers outstretched blindly toward him and when they curled around his large arm, you gently tugged on him. “Where’ve you been?” You whispered, keeping your eyes closed. He ran his tired eyes along your smooth face, no doubt recently washed with the apple scented soap he loved so much. The man dipped his head and pressed his lips against your cheek, allowing his dampened lips to rest against your skin for a few moments before he brushed his nose against your ear and inhaled deeply. “Downstairs. Working as usual, pet.” He explained before getting comfy at your side. When he began to draw back so he could lay flat on his back, your body was quick to follow, subconsciously following his so you could morph together. His body fit against your own like missing pieces to a puzzle.

Your starry eyes opened, so full of emotion it made him wonder how one tiny person could hold so much feeling for anybody else, but especially feelings for a man like himself. He gave you a slow smile, mesmerized by your beauty and all you’d done was wake up. “Where’s my good morning kiss?” Alfie hummed, waiting for you to give him one. “I’m not feeling so good, love.” You explained, burying your features into his clothed chest. The material he wore was soft, almost silky feeling, and it was very appealing against your face. “I like it so much better when you sleep with me instead of downstairs at your desk.” You told him quietly, receiving a hearty chuckle from him as you attempted to change the subject. Your head bounced lightly against his chest as he laughed, belly rising and falling in little dips. You lifted your head to eye the man with a scowl, curious to know what was so funny about what you’d said.

“You think I prefer to fucking sleep at that desk down there, pet? It’s fucking hard as a rock, innit, and you’re definitely not there to play with my fucking hair, right, so I’d have to agree, yeah, I prefer sleeping right fucking here with you too.” You moved your hand along his ribs and up to his neck. Playing lazily with the scruff of facial hair that coated his handsome face, you sighed breathily. “Well then I’m going to have to start luring you into bed with me since you lose track of time and don’t come at a reasonable hour.” You started to sit up, but he pulled you back down against him. “Did you say you were sick, pet?” He asked softly, piercing eyes gliding along your face. He could see you were flushed. Your eyes were sunken and as he brushed his thumb along your chin, he could feel the heat burn his finger. “My god, pet, you’re fucking burning up.” The man sat up with his brows pulled together in a deep frown. He rolled you gently to the side before sliding off of the creaky bed and moving out of the room. You gave him a look of confusion before looking to Cyril, who was snoring loudly.

Your voice was entirely too strained and hurt too much for you to call out for the man to see what he was doing. Luckily whatever it was, he did it fast. His boots hit the wooden stairs loudly as he made his way back up and down the corridor to the bedroom. He held a bottle of orange medicine in one hand and a spoon in the other, wiggling the contents. “This’ll make you feel better.” He told you softly before approaching again. You backed up on the bed with a little frown. “Oh, Alfie.. I. I suddenly feel a lot better.” You stood up on the bed, biting on your lip. “I don’t need any medicine.” You jumped off the bed and your entire head felt as if it might disconnect from your neck and roll right to the floor. Clutching your heavy skull, you winced, lowering yourself down to the floor in a heap. Alfie set the medicine down to instantly tend to you. His stomach was twisted with worry as he hunched over your little body. “Come here, right, I’ll take care of you, pet.” You let out a breathy moan, fingers moving to your throat as your nose began to sting. The fiery pain went down the back of your throat and into your right nostril. “I hate being sick.” You whispered, still wrapped in a little ball on the floor. “You shouldn’t be near me, Alfie, you’re gonna get sick too.” The man huffed stubbornly. His strong hands wrapped around your body, gripping you beneath your thigh as he hooked his other arm around your middle and hoisted you up.

Alfie lifted you as if you were a mere doll. You were off the floor in seconds and instead nestled into his embrace. “If you don’t take the medicine, pet, you won’t fucking get better, right, then I will get sick, yeah, but if you take it— the sooner you’re better, the sooner I can kiss you, innit?” Your lower lip trembled, but you nodded softly. “Right, then.” The man sat down on the edge of the bed, cradling you on his lap. He leaned over to retrieve the medicine, smoothly twisting the cap off of the top before pouring some into the spoon. “Two spoonfuls, right, and after that, you’ll be feeling so much fucking better.” You inhaled deeply, eyes clouded over with fear. You hated taking medicine. The man lifted the first spoonful to your tightly closed lips, urging you softly to open your mouth. “Come on, pet.” You could feel his fingers as they massaged your lower back, rubbing the tension away. “I’ll kiss you afterward?” He offered. You, unable to pass up on that proposal slowly parted your lips. The metal spoon entered your mouth and suddenly you couldn’t close it. Alfie was stuck, hovering the utensil above your tongue with no other choice but to dump it out and force you to take it. He wouldn’t though. “Pet, you’ve got to close your fucking mouth, yeah, I can’t keep my arm like this all day.” You shut your eyes tightly and he swore he saw little tears filling the corner of your eyes. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against your ear, whispering sweet little nothings against your skin. It worked. Your mouth closed obediently around the spoon and with a shiver at the horrid taste, you swallowed it down. Alfie kept his word and gave you a soft kiss to your sticky lips. He could taste the medicine too and didn’t blame you for giving him a hard time.

“It’s not meant to fucking taste good, pet, right, it’s just meant to help you and it will within no time.” He filled the spoon up again and you gave an audible groan. “I don’t wanna take anymore.” You stood from his lap, but he smoothly pulled you back down. “Ah, ah, ah, you’ve already taken one, it won’t hurt to take one more.” Your jaw clenched knowingly, staring at the man. “I can’t, Alfie. I really can’t—“ The spoon and medicine were set down for a moment so he could wrap his arms around you and discuss a new proposal. “I’ll give you a bath if you take one more mouthful?” That caught your attention. Your fingers lazily pinched the front of his shirt, tracing the buttons and loose strings that had managed to come off of the material. “Will you JOIN me in the bath?” You asked, wanting to clarify what exactly his offer was. The man cracked a slow smile before nodding his head. Giving you a rewarding kiss on your chin, he lifted the spoon and filled it with the nasty, but necessary liquid. “But— only if you take this the second it’s in your mouth, okay?” You nodded your head lightly, placing your small hands on his shoulders. He gave you the medicine again and the second you swallowed, you nearly threw up. “That’s my girl.” He pat your back, ensuring you were okay. Rising, the man left the spoon and medicine on the bedside table. Did you have to take more later?

The skin of his neck was hot as you pushed your face against it, cuddling him tightly as he walked down the hall and toward the bathroom. His boot nudged the door open and you instantly felt better at the thought of the hot water sloshing across your slightly sweaty skin. Lowering your legs to the floor, the cold tile kissed the bottoms of your feet. “Right, undress pet, do you want any bubbles or anything?” You shook your head softly, moving over to the cabinet. “I’m alright, Alfie, really.” He could tell that you weren’t. Your legs shook, struggling to hold up your body. He ushered for you to sit down on the toilet with a grunt before he left the room to get hot water to fill the tub with. You stared down at your feet, toes wiggling slightly as you thought about Alfie. He was entirely too good to you. In all truth, you didn’t feel as if you deserved him. The man was always so eager to take care of you, ready to pamper you with love and affection. He was everything you’d need in life. You knew you were young, much younger than he was, but it didn’t bother you in the slightest. Despite the age difference, you two got on very very well. Yes, there were incredible differences, such as his temper, which was bound to be set off at any moment. You didn’t get angry easy. You got upset over silly things, but you didn’t reach the point to where you were absolutely fuming. Alfie did. He was as caring as you though, if not more. Everything he did was for you.

You were dragged out of your thoughts when he moved back into the room to dump the large bucket of scalding water into the basin. Rising from your position on the toilet lid, you peeled off your nightgown and instantly moved toward the tub. Alfie wasted no time before he was ogling you, bright eyes boring into your silky flesh. He swallowed quietly before averting his eyes to his own clothing. You lifted your leg over the side of the oversized tub and carefully lowered yourself down and into the hot water. “Oh.. god, that feels good.” The man cocked a brow at your words before lifting his hand to smooth down his facial hair. His stomach flipped eagerly, cheeks heating up. “Right, pet, I know you don’t feel good and all, but you’re fucking moaning, yeah, a lot, and it’s kind of workin me up, innit.” He crossed his arms over his broad chest and you turned your head to look at him. Grinning slowly, your eyes flickered to his slacks. “Best get those off then, otherwise you’re going to strangle him.” Alfie snorted at your words before peeling off his shirt. Leaning over to retrieve your dress, he placed them both in the basket in the corner before he began to remove his trousers. “Quit looking.” He barked quietly as he could feel your penetrative eyes stuck on his form as he undressed. “Are we shy, Mr. Solomons?” The sounds of his ring rubbing against the button on his trousers filled the room, your eyes dropped to his thighs as he pushed the slacks down his legs and placed them in the dirty clothes basket as well. You bit your lip. You weren’t sure if the medicine was making you feel better or the fact that Alfie was taking his clothes off was. You straightened in the tub, water loudly splashing against the edges of the basin. “Alfie, hurry.” You whimpered quietly. “I’m cold.” The man cocked a brow, turning his attention toward you. His eyes flickered to your body, eyeing the way that the soapy water rose to your collarbones. You were definitely lying about being cold, but he was going to take advantage anyway and warm you up. Pinching the waistband of his boxers, he pushed them to the floor before rushing over to the bath. You, unable to keep your eyes way from the space between his thighs, flushed a bright shade of red. This didn’t go by unnoticed. As Alfie stepped into the tub and lowered himself down, he smirked at you. “Why’re you fucking looking at him like you don’t know who he is?” The man slumped against the side of the tub and your face darkened further. “You don’t really.. ever have him out unless it’s for sex.” Crawling toward the man, you easily slid on to his lap, curling up against his already damp chest. Cupping some of the water in your palm, you dropped it on his shoulders, watching the water droplets race along his skin.

Alfie moved his hand to your hip, guiding you closer to his body as he chuckled lazily in amusement. The tub was more than big enough for the pair of you which only amused him further. Of all the places to sit, you chose his lap. Your knees were either side of Alfie’s hips, wet hands lifting to cup his cheeks as you watched his features relax. “You know, Mr. Solomons, its good to sleep.” You whispered quietly, finger gliding along his beard. The man humphed quietly before inhaling deeply. “I lost track of time, pet.” You nodded lightly, leaning in to kiss him gently, being careful not to linger for too long. Maybe if you kept the kisses to a minimum, merely pecking him, then he couldn’t get sick. The logic was silly, but Alfie didn’t seem to mind at all. He kept trying to kiss you longer, deeper, but you would shake your head and simply pry him back. “Well, don’t lose track of time tonight. I like being held while I sleep.” You laid your head on his shoulder as if you were going to sleep right now and Alfie laid his hand securely on the back of your neck, holding you in place. The water wasn’t as scorching hot as it was when you had stepped in, but it still held a pleasant warmth. You fell silent and Alfie did the same. He lifted the bar of soap, running the white bar along your back and up to your shoulders. The man brushed your lengthy tresses away from your shoulder blades, watching your loosely curled strands fall from your warm back. You focused intently on the feel of his palms as they worked their way up and down, cleansing you to the best of his ability.

You sat up after a few moments so he could wash the front of your body and you couldn’t help but smile when the man hardly touched your breasts. “Alfie, they need cleaning to. You know you can touch me without it leading to sex, right?” Your nails roamed his shoulders, soothing the expression on his face. He looked offended in a way by your words. “I know that.” He muttered. “That’s my issue. I’m always ready for sex.” He muttered, head tilting back with a loud sigh. Your shaped brows pulled together in light confusion. You hadn’t thought about if he had been with anybody before you or how long ago those relationships had been. Shifting on his lap, you brought his soapy hands up to your chest, staring at him intently. “Well you held on for a while before me, didn’t you?” Your eyes shimmered with hope. It was odd, but you felt jealous to know that other women had been with your Alfie. The man straightened his head so he could see you better. “Yes, pet, I hadn’t had sex, right, in about a fucking year before you came along. A bit disappointing, really, innit?” Your slender arms curled around his neck, lips meeting his cheek. “No. I hadn’t even had sex before I met you, so I’m not the person to be judging.” The man inhaled deeply and you rose on his body with his intake of breath. “Right pet, but you’re a lot younger, yeah? So that’s a bit expected.” Alfie began to shift as the water grew cold and you stood helpfully as he moved to stand. The water droplets raced along your skin, down into the tub beneath you. “Hang on, Alfie.” You pressed your small hands to his taught stomach and stared up at him with the most sickeningly sweet expression he had ever seen.

“I’ll never understand,” His deep voice filled the bathroom. “how someone so fucking beautiful, yeah, and so fucking delicate, such as yourself, could love a fucking git like me.” You tutted beneath your breath, lifting yourself up and on to your tiptoes. The water moved around you as you leaned up, hands sliding back to their original position on his cheeks. You held them securely in your palms, thumbs tracing his facial hair. “Because, Alfie Solomons, you’re just as beautiful and just as delicate.” You whispered, eyes growing slightly droopy from how much love you felt for this human being. “You may be big and bad a lot of the time, but there’s a lot of good in you.” You kissed him softly. “I know that for a fact. I wouldn’t be with you if I didn’t think you were a good man.” You lowered yourself back down so you were stood flatly, but Alfie quickly hoisted you up and on to his hips. “You’re staying in my fucking arms all day.” Alfie stepped out of the tub and you couldn’t help but smile at his words. Would he stick by what he had just said? You weren’t sure, but you’d find out soon enough.

———————————————————

The air outside was skin-numbingly cold. It felt as if someone were wrapped around you, pricking you with a thousand tiny needles at once. You’d lost the feeling in your toes, but despite that, you still walked firmly alongside Alfie. Your fingers were as white as a ghost, completely pale as the pair of your were attacked by the strong gusts of ice cold wind. You let out a breathy whimper and Alfie instantly sensed your discomfort. The frigid temperatures never bothered the man. He was so use to being drowned in hot heat, he enjoyed the brief cold that embraced him. The giant at your side hooked his arm around your small shoulders and drew you into his big chest. He’d offered, insisted, on carrying you to the bakery, but you squirmed and pleaded for him to just let you walk because you knew his Sciatica would be bothering him later if he dared carry so much weight around. It wasn’t like you were heavy, but he shouldn’t be lifting something over twenty pounds for more than an hour altogether in one day, and here he was, trying to stick to his word and hold you every second he could. You pulled your rosy-colored face away from his chest and peered up at him. “My lips have gone numb, Mr. Solomons, I’m going to need a few kisses once we get to the bakery.”

You could feel his ribs tighten as his belly tensed with laughter. “Fuckin hell.” His loud chuckle was enough to warm the atmosphere. You felt hot all of a sudden as a blush crept up to spread along your already rosy, frozen cheeks. “Why does it amuse you when I try to be cute?” You whimpered once more, gasping softly as you hauled you in closer. “Because, pet, you are fucking cute, right, and it makes me happy by how much you love me, yeah, it does.” You soaked up the warmth that radiated off of him and when the bakery doors were within reach, you didn’t want to go inside. Would he still hold you this close once you were in his office and he had mountains of work to do? Alfie licked his lips. Setting his hand on your back, to urge you to part from him so he could open the door, the heavy wood groaned. He led you inside, fingers curled around your own. “Mornin’ lads, yes, Y/N’s here, it’s nothing new, right, so let’s keep fucking working, yeah?” Every man in the building lifted their eyes before instantly lowering them. Alfie’s coat practically floated along behind him as he moved toward his office. You were hot on his heels, eyes shimmering visibly as you climbed each step. Despite his sudden mood change and desire to be in his office, he hadn’t released your hand and he kept glancing back at you, ensuring you were right with him.

The door to his office closed softly behind the pair of you. Alfie pulled off his coat and hung it in the corner before outstretching his hand toward you, finger wiggling once. You pulled off your jacket and handed it over to the man so he could hang it. He pinched the chain of his spectacles and pulled the metal around his neck before setting the frame on the bridge of his nose. “Do you want to sit on the sofa, right,” He pointed to it. “Or do you want to sit with me?” The man peered at you over the rims of the lenses, before sidestepping his desk and lowering himself down and on to the chair. It didn’t take you long before you sat down on his thighs, settling down on his lap. “Will it be difficult for you to work with me sat here?” You asked him quietly, voice soft as you settled, back pressing firmly against his built chest. Alfie grunted quietly beneath his breath in response to your question. “No, pet, im good at multi-tasking, ain’t i?” You cocked a brow before turning your head to eye him over your shoulder. “I’m.. not too sure about that, Alfie. I think you get distracted rather easily.”

The man had his chin resting on your shoulder, staring down at the messy files on the desk before looking to you. “Right, I take it back, I’m fucking good at multitasking, yeah, if you’re not a part of that. Right, because you’re the biggest fucking distraction there is.” You couldn’t help but giggle at his words. “Alfie, how am I distracting when I’m just sitting here?” The man ushered to your lips. “You talk far too much, pet.” You didn’t take that as an insult. Alfie loved your voice and loved that you’d fill the silences with useless chatter. “Should I shut up then?” You whispered, biting your lip when he looked to you. “No.” He said simply, pressing a lazy kiss to your jaw. “Talk as much as you want, right, but I do gotta get this work done.” “After,“ You halted him. Dragging his face back toward yours, you smiled. “you warm up my lips.” Alfie obliged with no hesitation. Leaning in, his warm lips melted against your cold ones and he suddenly realized it was no fucking wonder you were sick. The cold was just as obsessed with you as he was. He kissed you until your lips were swollen, red, and hot before drawing back to catch his breath. “Mh?” You nodded. “Very good, thank you.” You settled down, lazily messing with one of his hands as he began to write with the other. The paper on the desk was stained with Alfie’s cursive. The black ink was smudged across the tan paper and the side of his hand was no doubt just as smeared. You kept quiet for the most part, doing your best not to interrupt him because, despite what he had said, you knew if he couldn’t focus then his work would pile up and he would spend every night, wide awake and then he’d be angry the next morning due to lack of sleep. The clock in the corner ticked by slowly which you were grateful for. There wasn’t much to do, no, but you were sat on Alfie’s lap, alone in his office, able to listen to his breathing and his soft grunts when he would work something out. You hoped this day never ended. It was the perfect opportunity to study him without him getting defensive from your staring.

The noisy door to Alfie’s office opened and Ollie made his presence known. “Tommy Shelby is here to see you.” Alfie’s eyes lifted. “Haven’t you ever heard of fucking knocking?” He growled softly, dark eyes falling back to the paper in front of him. “Tommy Shelby, mate, that bloke’s always fucking coming around here.” Leaning back in his seat, he ignored Ollie’s looks to you, perched on Alfie’s lap like a child sat on Santa. You gave Ollie a pointed look before laying your elbows on the desk. Alfie looked at the arch on your back as you hunched forward, studying you momentarily. “I don’t want to see Tommy, Alfie.” You moaned out, staring at the door as Ollie shut it, going to retrieve Mr. Shelby. “He carries himself too confidently.” You whispered, adjusting yourself on his lap before you stood. His hand shot out to grip your hip and you could feel his fingers flex lightly, tempted to yank you back down, but you assured the man that you weren’t going far. “I’m just going to look at your books, Alfie, okay?” The man gave you a cautious look before releasing you. His dark eyes moved to the door as it opened and in walked Thomas Shelby. He stood in the doorway for a moment, messing lazily with the chain that hung beside his hip. He had one hand tucked into the pocket of his navy colored trousers, eyes stuck on Alfie as if the man had taken a knife and jabbed it into Mr. Shelby’s back. You watched him warily from the mirror in the corner. The dirty glass absorbed the image of Thomas, so you had a perfectly good view of him, though your back was to him.

Your fingers traced the dust infested hard covers, studying them. Alfie liked to read? Or was this just decoration for his office. Smiling briefly to yourself, you nearly flinched when Alfie’s deep voice sliced through the silence in the room. Looking over your shoulder at the man you’d given your heart to, you watched as he leaned back in his seat, not bothering to hold back his true feelings when it came to the dark haired man in the door. Tommy’s blue eyes were ice cold and threatening. “You crossed me, Alfie.” He said simply, narrowing his eyes to challenge the bearded man at the desk. You arched a brow at that. When? As if Tommy had heard your silent question, he stepped further into the room, pink lips parting. “Sabini told me the truth about the races. Said you had something to do with the little mishap we experienced two days ago.” The chair groaned beneath Alfie’s weight. “And you’ll take that fucking Italian’s word over mine, right, mate, I don’t have time for this.” He ushered to the door. “Go on, fuck off.” Tommy didn’t move. “I need more of an explanation than that, Alfie.”

You turned around slowly, cradling a red hardcover book in your palms. “You either trust him or you don’t.” You spoke up softly, tone holding an air of nonchalance. Tommy’s eyes shot to you. “I’m not talking to you, am I, pet, go back to your reading, yeah? You’ve always got to give your input, Y/N, it’s not needed. It never will be. This is a meeting between myself and Alfie.” Your brows lifted, creases effectively forming on the pale skin of your forehead. Little curls, that couldn’t be tamed, framed the smooth skin of your face. Brushing them away, your curious eyes moved to your baker as he began to stand. “You won’t fucking speak to her like that, Tommy, or we will, right, we’ll have some real fucking problems.” Alfie hooked his fingers in the belt loops on his trousers and pulled them up before directing his finger at the man. “I didn’t fucking cross you, mate, you’re a bit fucking ignorant if you believe a fucking word that Darbi fucking Sabini has to say. It’s a lie, innit, and you, yeah, you took the time to come all the way here from fucking Birmingham to ask me if I fucking crossed you?” Your dark eyes slid along Alfie. He was hunched over his desk, eyes full of anger as he planted his hands down roughly on the surface. You knew majority of his frustration was because of how Tommy had spoken to you. Cradling the dirty book to your chest, you looked to the man as he directed those fiery eyes of his to your form. “Apologize to her, Tommy.” The black-haired Barbie doll let his eyes move to you. Both men ogled you. “It won’t happen again.” He said flatly. That was as good as you were going to get, you assumed. “No, Tommy, right, I said fucking say the words, ‘I’m Sorry’.” You weren’t sure why Alfie thought Tommy would listen, but as Alfie hunched over to retrieve his revolver, you gave him a look of bewilderment. “Alfie-“ stepping toward him with wide eyes, your small hand curled in the sleeve of his shirt. “Hey, it’s not that big of a deal.”

Thomas, completely aware of what the bearded man was leaning over to grab, remained absolutely calm, eyes rolling lightly. “I’m sorry.” He muttered. He came here to ensure that he and Alfie could remain on good terms, not to ruin what little trust was left between them. “Alright, Alfie? I’m sorry.” The man at your side loosened his grip around the handle of the gun before looking at you, then back to the Barbie in the doorway. “Right, then. I told you, mate, I didn’t fucking double cross you, yeah, so, if that’s all you’ve come here to fucking ask, you can be on your way.” The room was uncomfortably silent so you busied yourself with the chipped part of the desk in front of you. Picking at the wood, you scratched the surface until pieces of it were loose. Dusting them away and shyly on to the floor, you cleared your throat as Ollie poked his head in again. “Alfie, I need you!” There was no time for explanation. The tone in Ollie’s voice was urgent enough. “I’m a bit busy here, Ollie-“ The wide-eyed boy cut his boss off. “Yeah, but I need you, now, Alfie. It’ll only take a second!” He assured the man, eyes flickering to you and then Thomas and then back to Alfie.

The floorboards creaked beneath Alfie as he rushed across the room and brushed past Thomas. “What the fuck is it?” You jumped slightly at the loud boom of his voice. You could hear him descending the steps and when you could no longer hear him, in any sense, you realized you were alone with Thomas Shelby. The air in the room was as stiff as your body. You didn’t move, didn’t blink, didn’t speak, for fear that Thomas would take advantage of how vulnerable you were and rip into you some more with his harsh words. Your avoiding eyes moved toward the bookshelf, silently counting the amount of hardcovers Alfie owned, pressed together so tightly in the casing, it was almost difficult to drag one out. You crossed the floor slowly to create more distance between your body and Tommy’s, but as you stepped toward the corner, the man followed. “I think it would be better for you to wait in the hall.” You said softly, not turning your head at all to look at him. Your chipped fingernails brushed away the dust that coated the books so you could read the titles.

“If you think I’m afraid of Mr. Solomons, pet, you need to re-evaluate your thoughts.” He muttered. You could feel his hot breath waft over the revealed skin of your shoulder, alerting you of just how close he was standing. You spun around, giving yourself the opportunity to knee him right between his legs if need be. “I didn’t say you were afraid. I said it would be wise.” It was heard, in your words, that you had your jaw clenched and teeth gritted together. The man lifted one of his fingers and guided the ring covered digit toward your cheek, no doubt to brush the strand of hair away that never ceased its mission to annoy you. “He will cut that finger off.” You whispered softly, cheek already burning and he hadn’t even touched you yet. One minute, Thomas looked as if he may gently brush the strand away, the next you felt a sharp tug on the back of your head. You’d been so lost in your thoughts, you hadn’t felt his fingers wrap in your thick locks. Your scalp was on fire from the sharp tug, wincing instantly. You opened your mouth to cry out, but he placed his other hand against your mouth, silencing you. “Listen to me.” He warned, moving his lips to your ear. “I know Alfie crossed me, but he’s never one to admit to his mistakes, right, so you let him know if he does that again, it’s you that will suffer.” Shoving you roughly away from him, your back hit the bookshelf and the entire wooden casing shook. Thomas yanked you out of the way, easily saving you from being crushed by the oversized cabinet. A loud creaking filled Alfie’s office before the entire thing toppled over. If you would’ve been underneath that, it probably would’ve killed you. You let out a loud gasp when your rescuer, and coincidentally the man who had caused that little accident, pushed you down on the flat side of the bookshelf. “Now then.” He stared down at you. “Let’s have a little fun until Alfie comes running back up here, eh?” He wanted you. And he had wanted you from the very first time you’d accidentally entered the office and interrupted his meeting with Alfie.

Alfie was downstairs, head buried beneath one of the machines that had stopped working. The flat of his back was pressed into the hard floor, fingers growing dirtier by the second. Twisting the gears to get them back into their proper state, he let out breathy grunts of frustration, doing his best to hurry up and fix the damn thing. His knees bent, feet pushing roughly into the floor to guide himself further beneath the machine. “This fucking thing’s always giving the lot of you a hard fucking time, innit. Need to just throw this one out, yeah, it’s fucking useless.” Alfie’s men were gathered around him in a huddle, watching him squirm to try and fix the machine for the third time that week. “We’ll find a new one, boss.” One of the lads spoke up. Alfie didn’t respond, he merely grunted, and that was good enough for the boy. “Ollie, go get me pick out of my top drawer, yeah, I need that fucker so I can unscrew this.” Poking his head out from under the machine, the man licked his lips and waited for Ollie to scurry off.

Ollie climbed the stairs to retrieve the needle-like pin. He was much quieter on the steps when ascending them. There was no booming footsteps or loud huffs of annoyance. He didn’t mutter under his breath, swearing every other word. The boy turned the corner sharply and opened the door to the office. The clipboard in his hand clattered to the floor, dark eyes moving over your body and then Tommy’s. The bookshelf Tommy had you laid upon was resting halfway on top of Alfie’s desk. The little plant you’d purchased for Alfie a while ago was now shattered on the floor and majority of the books had come free from their slot. Some books were open, face down on the floor, others were slung all the way across the room to rest beside the door, but the casing wasn’t what Ollie was focused on. “What the hell are you doing!” Ollie barked loudly. The sight was horrifying. Tommy had you pinned to the wooden shelf, his hand desperately searching for a way beneath your mess of skirts. He was pressing feverish kisses to your hot skin, evidently ignoring the way you were squirming to get free. Thomas halted at the intrusion, eyes dark and clouded over with lust when he looked to the boy in the door. “Get out, Ollie. I’ll be finished in a minute.” His voice was deep and husky, thoughts obviously so hazy from his need for sex, he didn’t give a shit about being caught. You let a loud groan of plea leave your throat, dark eyes locking on to Ollie’s. The boy didn’t like you, but he respected you and never wanted to see you hurt. “Get off of her!” Ollie’s chest broadened and his feet hit the floor loudly as he approached. “Now!” His hand wrapped around Tommy’s shoulder, angrily pulling the man back. The two stumbled, both eager to get the other one out of the way. Thomas was determined to knock Ollie out and continue with what he was doing, Ollie was determined to try and knock Thomas out and then get you out of the room.

You stumbled to your feet, adjusting your dress quickly. The front of the fabric had fallen down significantly and your cheeks were flushed a red hue. The entire room was hot and you could feel your eyes beginning to water. Ollie growled, slamming Tommy up against the wall before roughly hitting him in the gut. You gasped sharply at the blow, but Thomas was unaffected. He lunged forward, yanking the boy to the floor with a growl. They continued to roll around on the floor, making even more of a mess in Alfie’s office. The laces on your gown were torn and your hair, previously neatly pinned out of your face, messily hung around your shoulders, still loosely tied in its clip. Alfie was growing agitated so he slid out from underneath the machinery, annoyance filling him quickly. “Where the hell is ollie!” He barked loudly. In this corridor, it was difficult to hear anything else because of how cemented the walls were.

“Sir, there’s a fight in your office!” One of the boys shouted. Alfie nearly broke his neck, swiveling around so fast. The soles of his boots crushed anything in their path, charging down the long hall and back into the main area of the bakery. His first thought was you. He could hear it now. Very clearly. Ollie was grunting and growling, Tommy was swearing and you were shouting for them to stop. Well— for Tommy to. Alfie climbed the stairs with his shoulders broadened and his lips wet. He was ready to shout. You prepared yourself, the second you heard him approaching. “What the fuck is going on!” The large man came to a stop in the doorway, studying the scene. His books were thrown this way and that, his right hand man was pinned to the floor, nose bloody and cheek swollen. Thomas was breathing heavily and although Ollie had hit him a few good times, there were no marks. His eyes dragged across the room to find you, cowering away in the far corner where nobody could touch you. The hard expression on his face seemed to harden further when he caught sight of the tanned laces undone, hanging around your chest. They were torn, making it impossible for you to tie back up. His fingers curled inward, ready to knock someone out. He looked to the men. Which one of them was it? He questioned silently, scanning the pair.

Murder. You saw it floating in Alfie’s gaze, the second he looked at you. Stepping over the messy floor, you pushed yourself into his bear-like arms and clung to him. Nobody could hurt you when he was around. Alfie locked his arm around you securely, ensuring that if anyone even dare to try and approach, they wouldn’t be able to touch you. When Thomas finally lifted himself off of Ollie, he adjusted his blazer and then licked his lips. “Well, I’ll be on my way then.” He spoke gruffly, pushing his messy black hair out of his eyes. You stiffened in your baker’s arms at the voice and the gangster instantly knew what had happened. “Ollie.” He barked. “Would you please take her downstairs and make sure she’s alright, mh?” His right-hand man was up in seconds. Alfie wasn’t an idiot. He didn’t need an explanation of what had happened. Ollie wiped the blood away from his lip before he moved toward you, smoothly grabbing ahold of your arm before hurriedly leading you away from the room. The second you and Ollie had reached the bottom of the stairs, you heard the roar from Alfie’s lips. The words that spewed from his lips were incoherent, simply muffled, but loud. Ollie pulled you from your thoughts, leading you down the hall and into a room of safety. He needed to tend to his wounds, but he needed to keep a close eye on you as well. He could tell you were distant, no doubt scared after what had happened. “Sit down there.” He ushered to the sofa in the corner. “Alfie’s probably going to be a while, so just get comfy.” Opening the white cabinet, Ollie dragged out a first aid kit. The inside was jam-packed with necessities, but he simply pulled out some rubbing alcohol and a tissue. You watched him intently, studying the way he wiped the blood away that fell from his nose before he stuck a clean swab of tissue in his nostril to prevent more bleeding. He rubbed the alcohol along the cut on his upper lip, not wincing in the slightest before he gave attention to the mark on his cheek. Lifting the icepack, he turned to set it in the icebox in the corner before looking to you as you spoke up. “Thank you.” Your voice was sweet, it reminded him of the days he spent as a child, laying outside in the garden with his younger sister as they ate popsicles and watched the butterflies fly above them. He frowned at the brief memory before looking to you. He wasn’t sure why he had had such a strong disliking toward you, but after today, things would surely change. He opened another cabinet and handed you a new tie to lace through the holes on the front of your dress. “You’ll need to re-tie that before Alfie comes down or else he’s going to continue to be angry.” You nodded in understanding, tongue tracing your lips. “I’ve got to go check that everything’s okay, I’m going to lock this door. Only Alfie has the other key to get in, so you’ll be okay.” Again, you nodded, giving no verbal reply. Ollie smiled lightly before excusing himself. Leaving the room, you heard the lock click audibly before you were left in the silence, alone with your thoughts as you changed the lace out on your dress.

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Shadows. They loomed over you. The floor beneath you was wet, ice cold against your bare skin. The solid ground nipped at your pale flesh, sticking to you with an impossible grip. You were in the middle of the alley, staring up at the dark buildings that towered higher than any buildings you’d ever seen before. The roofs nearly kissed the moon, stars shining brightly above, peaceful opposed to what you were experiencing on the ground below. Hushed whispers pressed against your ear and hot fingers ran along your body. You couldn’t move. The scream you wanted to let free was caught in your chest, blocked by the bubble in your throat. You couldn’t make a sound. The air was so cold, it froze your lungs with every inhale. It was more painful to breathe right now, than to suffer the itching burn in your chest from suffocation. You were alone. And yet, not. You could feel the presence of someone lurking as they looked down at you. Touching you. Feeding off of you. Your fear was their reward and boy, they were succeeding. You dared to lift your arm, but the only thing you accomplished was more pain. The ground clung to your skin, threatening to pull your flesh from your body, so you stopped struggling. You lay still and waited for whatever was to come.

“Y/N?” Your name echoed down the alley. “Y/N.” He said again, a little harsher. You shut your eyes, trying to plug your ears mentally since you couldn’t do it physically. The world around you seemed to crumble when you recognized the voice to belong to none other than Tommy Shelby. “Y/N.” He hissed again, daring you to open your eyes, but you wouldnt. You refused to look at the cocky, blue-eyed, cigarette-loving, full of himself, bastard. “Y/N!” Your eyes shot open and you were back in the room Ollie had left you in. Your breathing was heavy, loud and jagged. “You’re alright.” Alfie assured, arms curling around you securely so he could drag you off of the sofa and on to his lap on the floor. “It was just a bad dream, yeah, just a bad fucking dream, pet.” Your heart felt like it was being squeezed. Only the alley had been a dream, not the events that took place in Alfie’s office. Your arms locked around his neck in a vice and you tried to mold your body into his, wanting nothing more than to become one so you could escape the horrible memories crowding your brain. Alfie kissed your shoulder gently, drawing you into him as close as he was able. “Pet, it’s okay, right, I’ve handled it.” You drew back to inspect the man, ensuring he didn’t have any marks. Your eyes raked down his face, along his neck and then arms. He was completely okay— well, until you saw his hand. His knuckles were already tinted purple, no doubt bruised from whatever damage he had done to his mate, Thomas. The very thought of the name made your throat close and the bile rise. Alfie brushed your hair away from your face, studying you for marks. You had clumsy teeth imprints in your skin from where the fucking peaky bastard had dared to try and mark you. Alfie kissed your sore, before parting his lips and leaving his own mark on your skin. It wasn’t the time for this, but god it felt good, and it made you forget about what had originally been there. His beard tickled your sensitive skin and created a delicious contrast with the hickey he left behind. “I’m sorry I left you alone with him, pet. I should’ve fucking known, yeah, he was being a fucking—“

Straightening on his lap, you pressed your lips against his own to silence him. “Shut up. I don’t want you blaming yourself. It was nobody’s fault. Nobody’s, but his.” Brushing Alfie’s hair out of his eyes, you bit your bottom lip visibly. “My sickness is gone.” You pointed out, attempting to draw a smile from him. You didn’t want to talk about the events from earlier. Not right now anyway. His eyes lifted to yours, brows furrowing in confusion. He’d never understand how you could go through something like that, but still be so optimistic in the end and focus on the positives. The man grunted breathily. “Because you took your fucking medicine, yeah, see, I told you.” Your heart skipped a beat at the grin he let escape and your lips met his again for a delicate kiss. “Mh, yes, yes you did, thank you.” Giving him all the credit because you loved to see Alfie with a bit of an ego boost, you pushed your face into his neck and let the rest of the world fade away. Alfie was everything in the world to you. “I need to go by my grandmas and pick up a few more things tomorrow if you want to go with me?” You whispered sleepily as the silence washed over the room and you couldn’t think of anything else to say. Alfie gave a short nod, afraid to move. He could feel you drifting off and he figured maybe if he let you nap, but he stuck around to hold you, then you wouldn’t have any nightmares. “Anything you want, pet.” Your breaths were much deeper over a span of just a few seconds and before you were lost in a world of obliviousness, you sleepily whispered in response to his words. “All I want is you.” The entirety of Alfie’s body relaxed. There was no tension in his muscles as he held you against him. He smiled in your hair, nuzzling into you further. He had to agree, all he wanted in life was you as well.

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Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Tagged: @thatsamegirl @peakyhoegh @ihclipse @callisen @hardygal69 @centerhabit @favouritereadings @buckypetal15 @captstefanbrandt @lucacangettathisass @seremedyxiii @astro-sweetheart @goodiesintheclosetlove @fangirlfreakingout @kelly-fasel

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Hi, guys! I hope you enjoy this part!! Im sorry I’m falling behind ): I will be posting another story today, I’m just not sure how many or which one yet!! ❤️ thank you for being so patient with me and remember requests are always open ( even though I am slacking on posting omg ahah )

#alfie imagines #alfie solomons #alfie solomons fanfic #alfie solomons fanfiction #alfie solomons imagine #alfie solomons x reader #tom hardy #tom hardy fanfic #tom hardy fanfiction #tom hardy imagine #tom hardy fic #tom hardy x reader

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welcome-to-my-daydreams · 6 years

Text

Midtown Rendezvous 4 (final)

Summary: New York’s most famous genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist asks to take Reader out for drinks. She accepts, throwing her inhibitions to the wind.

Pairings: Tony Stark x Reader

Type: Mini-series

Warnings:

Word Count: 1,250

A/N: A friend recently bought me a beautiful rose bath set and while I treated myself to a home spa day this little story popped into my mind.

This will be the final chapter of Midtown Rendezvous! I thought about keeping it going but It was only meant to be a one-shot at first and I’d rather end it the way I planned than make more up as I go! Enjoy and thanks for reading!

Part 3

Masterlist

Tony’s alarm buzzed on his bed side table. He reached to turn it off before rubbing his eyes with his index finger and thumb. It was 5:30 in the morning and he had to get across town to a meeting for 7:00. He looked over at your sleeping form. You were lying on your back, head tilted away from him and resting peacefully on his arm. He was so tempted to completely clear his scheduled for the morning, just so he could stay in bed withy you.

He rolled onto his side and traced circles on your shoulder, giving it a soft kiss before gently freeing his arm from underneath you so he could get ready for work.

Once showered and dressed he looked at you one last time, smiling to himself and saving the image of you lying there in his bed to his memory. He opened and closed the door quietly so as not to wake you and headed off to work.

A few hours later the heat from the sun shining through the high windows of The Tower roused you from your sleep. You rolled your face into the Egyptian cotton pillow, reluctant to meet the day. You looked at the clock and saw that it was 9:00am. With a yawn, you stretched under the covers and rolled over to find an empty space beside you.

You stretched beneath the covers, squinting in the sunlight before sitting up completely.

You were startled when a voice echoed through the room, “Good morning Ms (y/l/n). How are you today?” You quickly covered yourself “Uhh, fine…Thank you.” You started looking around the room, incredibly confused. “Mr Stark had to go to a meeting this morning, but he has placed some clothes for you in the bathroom and invites you to help yourself to anything in the kitchen.”

The mention of Tony’s name brought a warm blush across your face as images from the night before popped into your head.

You put on the black satin kimono that was draped over the foot of the bed. “Thank you…um, do…do you have a name?” you asked awkwardly. “Yes ma’am, you can call me FRIDAY.”

You walked across the room and entered the bathroom to take a shower. You would be lying if you said you didn’t take your time in the spacious cascading shower. Letting the pressure of the water hit your back while the steam filled the room in a thick fog. When you finally got out of the shower your cleared off the mirror and gasped when you saw the dark red marks on your neck from Tony’s possessive kisses. You blushed again as you remembered the electricity that ran through you while he gave you those marks.

When you finished up in the bathroom you put on the clothes Tony had left for you. They must have been some kind of Avengers casual wear, both the white t-shirt and the black yoga pants had tiny little A symbols on them.

After drying you hair you collected your clothes which has been folded over the couch in Tony’s bedroom and grabbed your shoes. When you made it downstairs you decided to help yourself to a coffee. You noticed the high tech coffee machine in the kitchen was already set to cappuccino. You suppressed a smile and pressed on the touch screen.

When the drink was ready you took it over to the living room and stood in front of the large windows, the whole city of New York below you. You take a moment to scroll through the messages on your phone. They were mostly about work and a few from your friends who were curious to know how the night went. You were scheduled to work at home today and you saw that your emails were already beginning to pile up, so once you finished your coffee you said goodbye to FRIDAY, grabbed your things and headed home to start working.

It had been about a week since you had gone out with Tony on the date that will forever be referred to as the Midtown Rendezvous by you and your friends. You hadn’t heard from him since. One part of you felt more than content with the memory of your steamy fling with Tony Stark, while the other part really hoped he’d call you. You had almost called him yourself on two separate occasions but chickened out completely both times. It was a lost cause.

Luckily you for you, you didn’t have much time to focus on your love life since you had officially been given the account you signed a week before. You were busier than ever and completely threw yourself into the work. You did have a few meetings at the client’s Midtown office and you always made a point to pop in to the coffee shop across the street in hopes to run into Tony.

But you never did.

You headed to the office early one Thursday morning for a meeting with the copywriters who were working on the material for the new client. You were a little behind on the project and had to come to a decision on a campaign today so that it would be ready to pitch to the client by Monday.

You rushed in to work with your coffee and your briefcase filled with your tablet and various papers. You didn’t make it very far through the door to the office when one of your work colleagues came up beside you.

“You have some explaining to do missy.” She said with a playful smile. “What are you talking about, Julie?” You said impatiently. You really didn’t have time for whatever this was. “We all knew you must be seeing someone, but now we know for sure and I want to know who.” She continued probing.

You had no idea what she was talking about and you were about to snip at her, but as you rounded the corner to your desk you saw what she must have been talking about.

You stopped dead in your tracks and stared at the pitch black, circular gift box with a golden border and golden letters spelling out the name Dior on the front. You approached your desk and put everything down before lifting the lid of the beautiful box. Your eyes widened when you saw the bouquet of at least a dozen large, crimson red roses neatly fitted into the container. You brought your hand to your mouth in utter shock. Laying on top of the bouquet was a tiny white envelope with a note inside. You opened the letter and read it to yourself.

Dinner, tomorrow night, 8 o’clock?

Give me a call, beautiful.

- T. Stark

An uncontrollable smile crept up the corner of your mouth as you read the letter two, three times over. You put it down and picked up one of the roses from the box, nuzzling your nose into it’s soft, smooth pedals before taking in its beautiful scent.

“T. Stark?! You mean The Tony Stark!?” Julie gasped as she read the letter you stupidly left open on your desk. “Hey! Have you ever heard of a thing called privacy?” You yelled, swiping the card from her hand.

“Never mind me, (y/n). What are you waiting for? Go call him!” She said excitedly. She handed you your phone. Blushing under the watchful gaze of your surrounding coworkers you dialled his number and headed out into the hallway, anxiously waiting for him to pick up.

Want to join the tag list? Send me a PM specifying if you want a permanent tag or just a certain character or series!

@nerissa98 @alittlehoneybear @shydinosaurcandy @ourdreamsrealized

#tony stark #iron man #tony stark x reader #tony stark smut #tony stark fluff #tony stark imagine #avengers imagine #avengers x reader #x reader #reader insert #mcu #tony stark kink #marvel fan fiction

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terribletoxins-a · 7 years

Note

gimme josabel you coward 😂

General:

How long will they last? Until Johanna has a compulsorily heterosexual affair and the dies soon after.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? Isabel? Immediately. Johanna? Took a week or two.

How was their first kiss? We just spent like two whole months writing their steamy first “it’s winter, it’s cold out, stay with me, I can keep you warm” kiss, followed by the pair of them sharing a bed for warmth & practicality.

Wedding:

Who proposed? Isabel, probably after Johanna attended a friend’s wedding and she became jealous that two women couldn’t marry each other when she clearly feels that for Jo.

Who is the best man/men? They don’t have one, but Johanna’s cousin Konrad can be considered a post-marital best man at some point in the future.

Who is the bridesmaid(s)? Again, they don’t have any, but Isabel’s old, sexually liberal roommates catch on very quickly when the pair of them begin wearing rings on the fourth finger of their left hand.

Who did the most planning? They both did, really. They went their separate ways to write vows, pick dresses, and buy rings. Isabel did go the extra mile and brought a little cake for after they exchanged the rings and vows, however.

Who stressed the most? Johanna, probably. Isabel was nervous that Johanna would think a marriage was crazy, but Johanna had pressure from her sister, Maude, to leave her strange “roommate” and marry a man, and she is always a bit more nervous than Isabel naturally.

How fancy was the ceremony? Not… very. They had their little ceremony privately in a very secluded area of their favorite park, but it was just the pair of them, their vows, and their rings. Although she would have preferred an afternoon at a clerk’s office if their marriage were legal, Isabel was quite upset that she couldn’t give Johanna the big church wedding with the grand dress and veil and cute little flower girls that she thought her wife wanted and deserved.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? Maude, the law.

Sex:

Who is on top? Isabel, for sure.

Who is the one to instigate things? Also Isabel, until Johanna overcomes her shyness and begins to take charge. (Jo did instigate that first kiss, however, after some prodding and hinting from Isabel.)

How healthy is their sex life? Extremely, until Johanna starts pulling away around the eighth or ninth year of their marriage.

How kinky are they? Not very, since they are two women in Edwardian Europe who have to maintain a degree of silence/privacy. (In the verse where Jo returns to Isabel once she’s Doctor Poison or the modern verse, however…)

How long do they normally last? Not long, ever. They’re so sappily, stupidly, happily in love with one another that the slightest touch can set the other off.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? Usually, yes, but if Johanna is in a playful mood…

How rough are they in bed? Catch Johanna having to beg Isabel to be rougher with her, because Isabel is so madly enamored with this woman that she doesn’t want to “break” her.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? no touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | a little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | they snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory

Always behind closed doors, for obvious reasons, but they can’t keep their hands off of one another.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? In the modern verse, one, but it depends on your definition of “natural.”

How many children will they adopt? Isabel adopts any child that Johanna carries, for the legal benefits and rights.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? Isabel, because she always capitulates whenever Johanna looks tired or upset in the slightest.

Who is the stricter parent? It always looks like Isabel is stricter to outsiders, but Johanna is the one who really follows through on punishments and rules. How can Isabel possibly say no to a child with the eyes of her darling Johanna?

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? Johanna stops their daughter and Isabel. Isabel and the missing half of her face are obviously far less cautious with her science experiments, and she often encourages the girl to learn with her. Johanna has to remind them that gloves and goggles are required, and poisonous gasses are not fun alternatives for firecrackers.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? Isabel.

Who is the more loved parent? They’re equally loved, but in very different ways. Johanna is more like a security blanket parent, and Isabel is more like a provider and educator parent.

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? They both do, to flaunt the fact that they’re a happy two-mom household and to make sure their daughter is receiving the highest quality education.

Who cried the most at graduation? Johanna, but Isabel cried in bed the night before.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? Isabel, while Johanna watches and nods. (However, what is waiting for that kid when they get home…)

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? Isabel.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? Also Isabel, though she does hold a century of teasing over Johanna’s head whenever her wife tries anything vegan or gluten-free or…

Who does the grocery shopping? Johanna.

How often do they bake desserts? Whenever Jo joins Isabel in the kitchen or just kisses her wife and asks for something sweet.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? Salad eaters, but there is a fair amount of meat, since they cook a lot of traditional Spanish (and German, to Isabel’s displeasure) dishes.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? Johanna, probably.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? Isabel, for sure. In the pre-canon verse, she loves getting out and getting coffee or tea with Jo. In the modern verse, she just wants to show off her brilliant, gorgeous wife.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? Isabel, as always. Johanna is far too cautious and safe to do such a thing.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? They generally keep it pretty clean, but only because Isabel doesn’t want to upset Johanna with her usual clutter. That’s reserved for her study.

Who is really against chores? Neither, but there are some chores they each simply won’t do. Isabel ends up on dish & mopping duty, while Jo is usually on laundry duty.

Who cleans up after the pets? Isabel, since she is the one who owned the monster cat before their relationship and later brought another stray kitten home.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? Isabel, and she gets what’s coming to her during their annual spring cleaning when Johanna volunteers to beat the dust from the carpets.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? Johanna. In the pre-canon verse, they can’t have anything that shows that they sleep in the same bedroom or share any sort of romantic bond out and about. In the modern verse, she wants people to be comfortable and impressed in her home.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? Johanna once found Isabel’s entire wallet and kept it for three days without saying anything. Isabel didn’t notice.

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? Johanna, but the regularity with which Isabel joins her is startling.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? They don’t have a dog, but the cat often sneaks out and takes itself for a walk.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? They decorate and/or prepare for Christmas and All Saints Day (Isabel makes offerings for her little brother—and sometimes Johanna herself—out of habit, but never really travels to her family’s graves). In the modern verse, catch onto Halloween very quickly, and enjoy teasing the neighbors about Isabel’s secret-but-not-quite past as Doctor Poison. The year they were in Brooklyn and decorated their small yard to look like a haunted no man’s land was a wild hit.

What are their goals for the relationship? Isabel: keep Johanna happy and alive. Johanna: keep Isabel happy and from getting arrested.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? Isabel, because she works and works until she passes out with a book on her chest in bed beside Johanna.

Who plays the most pranks? Isabel teases, but Jo pranks.

#amazonleader #ihrschatzi #( a dangerous collection of all my favorite things ) ; johanna #answered #( headcanon )#i've been WAITING

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whisperwoofwoof · 7 years

Text

Golden Ch 3

Rating: Mature Pairing: JongKey Chaptered/WIP | 1.6k words Warnings: Language, alcohol mention, occult, supernatural Prompt: Dish soap, Children climbing a tree, Whistling, A sex scene, Holy water (PENDING)

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

Jonghyun awoke to cicadas creating a ruckus.

He opened his eyes to find himself on the couch, sunlight pouring through the blinds. The TV had been turned off and the soda cans that were on the coffee table had disappeared.

“Good morning, babe.”

Kibum appeared from the front door, very clearly coming in from outside. His clothes were on the casual side, a little more ragged than he usually wore. This only meant that Kibum was in one of his cleaning moods. Jonghyun stretched as he sat up, determined to the other man.

“So, you’re cleaning this morning?” he asked him.

“Yeah, it just seemed like it was time,” Kibum grinned as he handed an empty trash bag.

Jonghyun could only smile at him as he took the bag and went to his bedroom. Kibum looked fondly at Jonghyun walking away, expression falling as he shifted out of view. He didn’t want Jonghyun to know the real reason why he started on this cleaning frenzy.

When he awoke that morning, the board was nowhere to be seen. He was sure that he nudged it underneath the bed after the events the night before. He even tried to convince himself that the way the lightbulb shattered, with tiny pieces of glass being strewn across the room, was merely a dream and that the board never came home with him. However, when he looked closer at the nightstand and the floor beneath it, shards of the lightbulb were still visible.

He deep cleaned his room and the entire apartment, save for Jonghyun’s room. He could not find the board anywhere. He even texted his friends to see if they knew of its whereabouts for some reason, but they were either hungover or busy.

Kibum continued to clean the living room and watched Jonghyun walk out of his own bedroom with a bag full of trash. He smiled at him as he walked past, never mentioning the search for a missing Ouija board. He waited until he was sure Jonghyun was on the way down the stairs to take a quick peek into his bedroom. The trash was picked up, and the room itself was is a disarray that simply represented Jonghyun, but the board did not make its way into the other man’s bedroom. Hell, it was impossible, but Kibum was desperate to find that damn board somewhere.

It creeped him the fuck out. He wondered how the hell a piece of wood could just disappear without a trace. He hardly felt comfortable in his own room, and even in his own home. He continued to sweep up and was in the middle of dumping the dustpan into the garbage when Jonghyun walked back in.

“Wow, you really cleaned this place up!” He said, curving his arm around Kibum’s back.

“Yeah, the place just felt a little gross after last night,” Kibum replied as he melted into the comforting touch.

“I’ll bet. Alcohol always makes me feel gross the morning after. But hey, since you’re not puking your guts out, we should go out for breakfast!”

“Sure, I’ll go get dressed.”

Kibum did not want to stay in his apartment while that board was still missing. He felt uncomfortable, like he was being watched, like he had to be wary every time he turned the corner. He didn’t want to overthink it, but as long as that board was missing, his once safe haven had him on edge.

It felt good to get out of the house for a while. What was supposed to be a morning out for breakfast soon turned into an all-day outing. They went to a farmer’s market, took in a movie, and found themselves on the other side of town. There were small shops that neither man had ever seen before, including a New Age shop. The store window had displays of crystals and flowers, with candles and books appearing as well. One book did catch Kibum’s eye. It looked like an older book, but had a detailed picture of an Ouija board on the cover. His interest was piqued and he felt like it had answers to the questions he had. How did it know Jonghyun’s nickname? Why did the planchette move the way it did? Did he mess with something he shouldn’t have?

“Hey Jjong, let’s go in here,” he called out to the other man.

“Seriously? Don’t you think that stuff is just a bunch of bullshit?”

“Are you coming or not?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Jonghyun was right behind Kibum as he entered the shop. A small windchime fluttered with the breeze of their arrival. The shop was almost comforting, air smelling like lavender and another herb he could not recall. The background music was of an American artist he had heard before. Her unique voice and the soothing notes of the song helped to set the atmosphere of the shop.

He made his way to the display to pick up the book he had seen. As he thought, it was older, but the information inside looked fairly legitimate, or as legitimate as a new age book could get. It mentioned many things that are supposed to be done when using a spirit board. It mentioned to use salt for protection, and to not use while under the influence of any drugs or alcohol, or while emotionally distressed. The book mentioned some essential rules to consider while using the board, including the importance of never leaving the board without saying goodbye.

Kibum stopped and tried to remember the night before. He was sure he said goodbye, unless that was only when he did it with his friends. He focused on the events in his bedroom, how drunk he was when he slid onto the bedroom floor, how he left the board in his shock and kicked it underneath the bed, only for it to go missing within hours. He remembered the things his grandmother would say, about how demons preyed on the weak.

He felt sick, feeling that he not only let his grandmother down by messing with shit he shouldn’t have been near, but he also let himself down. He wanted to be accepted by his old friends so bad. It didn’t matter what they did or how they did it, he just wanted to be involved. With them, he felt like he was back in his glory days, when everybody still loved him and his family still talked to him. Now, he felt like shit because the sun was setting and no one could tell him of the board's whereabouts, or if they experienced any weird happenings. They were unbothered and living their lives, while he stupidly opened a door to something sinister, dragging Jonghyun into it as well.

His turmoil was interrupted by a voice behind him.

“Can I help you guys find anything?”

He turned to see a man behind him, wearing a lilac apron. He appeared to be the same age as Kibum and Jonghyun, but his energy felt more mature. His smiling face broke Kibum out of whatever internal conflict, forcing him to answer.

“Uh no we were just leaving.”

Jonghyun looked up from the candle he was sniffing as Kibum spoke and put down the book. The shop worker threw and inquisitive glance at Kibum, but didn’t pry for an explanation.

“Oh, well if you change your mind, here’s my card.”

The man reached into a pocket on his apron and pulled out a little blue card. It showed the name of the shop, along with the phone number, store hours, and the name of the shop worker. Kibum looked at it before putting it into his own pocket, while Jonghyun finally appeared beside the two.

“If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to come back.”

“Thanks,” said both of the boys as they pulled the door open once more to leave.

Nothing seemed too weird when they returned to the apartment. Still, Kibum insisted on sleeping in Jonghyun’s bed that night. It took him a bit to fall asleep, considering what the shop worker had mentioned about any questions. He chuckled at himself, figuring that the man was probably talking about customer service questions and not the occult. He calmed himself down, falling into a slumber with Jonghyun by his side.

He awoke to a shrill beeping in the middle of the night. He covered his ears before realizing what it was. The smoke detector was going off, and both he and Jonghyun jumped out bed. They ran out of the room and Kibum felt his heart drop as he realized where the smoke was coming from. The doorknob to Kibum’s bedroom was hot to the touch, forcing him to kick it in with all his might. After numerous tries, the door swung open to flames engulfing Kibum’s bed.

As he stood shocked, Jonghyun ran in with the fire extinguisher. The flames soon became smothered and the piercing sound of the smoke detector finally stopped. The two coughed and waved their hands in front of their faces as they were left with a smoky, dark room. Kibum crept inside and flicked on the overhead light. He felt his heartbeat faster at what he saw.

On top of the charred comforter, save for the white foam, was the perfectly placed and pristine Ouija board.

“What the fuck?” said Jonghun, although Kibum could not reply.

They walked further into the room, horrified at what was in front of them.

The missing planchette was also with the board, unmoving and still, with the eye piece hovering over the word GOODBYE.

#my writing #jongkey #fanfic #shinee #wowie wow wow #cheeky shout out to stevie nicks #uhm so its going to have more chapters lol whoops #nope still not projecting #is it scary is it likeable? let me know!#still working on that body switch fic #oh yeah and uh my portfolio? guess that's important huh?#writingjes

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canaryatlaw · 7 years

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So today started out kind of nuts but ended up being pretty good overall. The craziness is my fault of course, mine and my lazy ass. I did convince myself to get up, but said I'd uber in so I could sleep till 7:40. Then I apparently overslept that alarm and woke up at 8:40. FUCK. Like more than normal fuck because I'm supposed to do two hearings this morning. Dammit. So I scramble to get ready and am out the door in 20 minutes, grab an uber and get there by 9:40. I run upstairs, literally because the elevators were inconveniently being ridiculously slow, like even worse than normal, and I just couldn't deal so I walked up 3 flights of stairs (which is like, nuts for me because walking up stairs still gives me ridiculous shin splints despite the fact that I do it on a daily basis), ran to my office and printed off my questions, then ran back down the stairs and into the courtroom. The worker on the first hearing was running late (a very typical occurrence) so I got some time to go over my questions with my boss which was helpful. So we hung out and they did a couple other cases, then the worker for the second one showed up so I talked to her and filled in some blanks, then not too long after that case got called. The ASA let me take the lead because they're cool about that, and they still get to ask questions anyway so it's not a big deal, especially on cases that aren't contested. It went pretty well, I thought that I was very thorough (I had a lot of notes) and afterwards the state didn't have any follow up questions which meant I covered everything they wanted to know too, and that was the entire hearing! So that was cool. That girl is apparently getting her life together after being on run and prostituting herself for a good while, she's set to move into a TLP apartment Monday and is looking to get her GED, so props to her. We ended up doing the next case right after, which was less complicated with details. He is also doing well, majorly because he just graduated from high school last week which might not seem like much, but trust me it is a MAJOR accomplishment for a kid in the foster care system (which is very sad, but that's another conversation), especially one that has a learning disability. So yeah, it was a morning of good hearings and I went back upstairs feeling good about it. I wrote up my notes from the hearings before turning to the other assignments I had (which I may recount slightly out of order). I knew I had to call "juvie" for the never ending interview saga, which I wasn't sure how to handle because I faxed them the request on Tuesday for today and asked them to call me to schedule a time, but of course I wasn't there yesterday, so my not hearing from them could've been partially my fault. So I call and just say I hadn't heard from them (true) and got sent through a few people, and I recounted the actions I took Tuesday, and they were just like "yeah we never got your fax" despite the fact that I confirmed with them I faxed it to the right number addressed to the right person, and had confirmation it went through. To their credit they did let me set up an interview for tomorrow morning anyway, they were like "we're going outside protocol here" and I felt like saying yeah well it's not my fault YOU KEEP LOSING EVERYTHING I FAX YOU. So I was somewhat frustrated with all of it, but ultimately just happy I got the interview for sure scheduled with a confirmation and everything, and I got it done before I left being that tomorrow is my last day before I go on vacation, and she needed it done before the time I come back and I really didn't want to have to return it to her being like "sorry I tried but failed." So I'm glad I don't have to do that. Most of the rest of my day consisted of prison phone calls, I got through about 33 of them I believe (there's 101). It was mostly more of the same, their plot to get her bailed out fell apart, then she went to court the next day and asked for house arrest so she could "be with her kids" despite the fact that she's not supposed to have custody of any of her kids!!! But the judge was like "you've been in jail all these years already, your kids don't need you" and proceeded to raise her bond from $1500 to $7500, which of course is gonna making bailing her out a LOT harder. Then the boyfriend tells her "her lawyer" called and was asking about the kids and everything and she flips out and was like "don't tell that bitch anything, she's working with the judge to send DCFS after me." Like lady, are you serious? This is your fucking lawyer. And she's like hardcore cursing her out and saying all these terrible things about her and I'm just like Jesus Christ and you really think she's working with the judge??? You're actually insane. And she just continues to say more stupidly incriminating things like "take my daughter with you when you come to visit me so if DCFS asks you can use that as an excuse." Like, lol, you're really stupid aren't you? The ultimate irritation came when I was talking to the lawyer on the case and I found out that despite the judge saying it was gonna be a class 2 felony and she was facing 4-15 years in prison (because that's what happens when you have EIGHT serious shoplifting offenses) she somehow got to plead guilty and got off with a 90 day sentence, which was effectively time served and she got out in January. Like, seriously? That's so fucked up, and now she's out running around on drugs and fucking up her kids. Lovely. The other assignment I did during the day was just some motions for one of the other attorneys, they were to advance and reset some cases for two dates she's not gonna be here, so it was just a matter of changing the info on each of them to fit the specific case. I hadn't done that kind of thing since my DCFS legal days last summer (since it's generally more what paralegals do) but I got them because I potentially could've presented them, but I'm gonna be out next week so I couldn't (they would've been super boring to do anyway so I don't really care). So those were pretty basic. I didn't run out early to catch the 5:03 bus because I didn't need to, but then of course instead of the regular 5:13 bus the next bus wasn't until 5:24, and it doesn't tell me this until it's too late to run for the 5:03. Dammit. Those are critical minutes, traffic wise. So I head out at 5 and go to the bus stop, the homeless man who hangs out on the median (I need to ask his name) was out so I waved him over and gave him a protein bar and talked to him for a few minutes. He's a nice guy. The bus did finally come around its predicted time, and it was already more crowded than the earlier ones, and just because it was that much late it took soooo much longer to get through traffic, like it was ridiculous. If I take the 5:03 I'm home in a little over an hour, giving me ample time to get ready for my 7 pm PT appointment. With this bus, I didn't get home until 6:45, which meant I had to run into my apartment and change in approximately 3 minutes before heading right back out to make it to the PT place by 7. So that was frustrating, but oh well. PT was good, did more of the dry needling so hopefully that will help. It's weird, they're super thin so they don't really feel like getting stuck with a traditional needle at first, but then when it hits the muscle it's like this dull achy cramp feeling that is just very strange to experience. But hey, if it helps I'm all for it, I'm a tough kid anyway (my PT guy even commented I was handling it way better than most people and I was just thinking yeah because I've had to deal with much worse 😯). He was saying we should've been making more progress with pain at this point so they're gonna try some new things because he can tell I've been doing the exercises and it shouldn't still be bugging me like this, so hopefully that works. But that was good and I got appointments scheduled for the two weeks when I get back, all for 7 which means no rushed uber rides back, so I was pleased with that. Walked home, got dinner and decided to watch the latest episode of the Handmaid's tale before I lose my roommate's Hulu access for two weeks. Not that any of the episodes are particularly pleasant, but I found this one particularly uncomfortable to watch. I don't like watching the commander interact with Offred at all, especially not the way he was tonight, like she was his plaything and you could tell she was SO uncomfortable with it the entire time it just had me cringing, especially pretending to be his wife while she was gone, like I know obviously the standards are different in this crazy society but like, that's gotta be considered straight up cheating when you're taking your handmaid out for a night at a nightclub and hotel. It was just...ick. At least she got to see her friend though, and I thought the symbolism at the end with the music box was particularly well done. It's struck me before how much the wife treats Offred as if she is a child, offering her a music box that was in her room when she was a child and just generally being patronizing in the way you would with a child. It continues to be a good show though of course. After that I decided to start my rewatch of legends season 1 with a few of you, which I already recounted my thoughts of on here earlier, so I don't need to recap them here. I'm definitely going to enjoy rewatching the episodes though. I thought about rewatching season 1 last summer several times but never actually got around to it, so I'm definitely going to like seeing the episodes again. And yeah, after that I got ready for bed and ran around a bit packing things up for tomorrow. The plan is to go to work, leave there at 2:30 and uber home, pack my last minute things, uber to the airport, and get there by 4:30 for my 5:30 flight. There should be ample time to do all of this given that it won't be rush hour and neither the distance from my job to my apartment or the distance from my apartment to the airport takes a full hour. And yeah, then by 8:45 NY time (probably sooner, they always overestimate landing time on this flight I've found) I'll have touched down and will soon be on my way home! I'm so excited. My cousin's baby shower is Saturday morning, so we're definitely jumping right into exciting stuff. I'll probably spend Saturday afternoon with my sister (<3) and hopefully see Wonder Woman, then Sunday we're going into the city to see Anastasia and I'm super excited for all of it! Okay it's late so I'll end it there. Goodnight my loves. Happy Friday.

#daily journal #June 2017 #FINALLY ITS JUNE #THANK GOD

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