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jjkyaoi · 3 years

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Hey, hi, hello, there’s a couple things I’m boutta let out that’s dsmp related, and if you don’t agree w/ it that’s fine, I’m just sick of seeing the same shit repeated over & over. So, take this. (I’ll probably private it anyways.)

(Some possible sensitive subjects.)

1. People shitting on Tommy for choosing L’manberg, saying it’s “just a bunch of buildings over his family”. Because, if you would’ve watched his POV you would’ve understood that L’manberg has never been “just a bunch of buildings” to him; it’s been the people. It’s been the people he’s fought for the country w/, his friends and his family — this community is what he cares about, not the fucking structures or the caravan or fucking. Any of this. He has laid this out; he has made this obvious. Him choosing L’manberg over Techno was heartbreaking, yes, but when he did that he wasn’t choosing the buildings or the structure over Techno, he was choosing his friends because he snapped out of it — he was realizing how much he was hurting this community of people he cared so much about, and he didn’t want to take his bad experiences out on them. He did it for Tubbo, specifically, because when he said “the disks mattered more than you ever did”? It clicked to him who he was becoming — he was hurting the people he loved the most. He didn’t want to do that anymore. So no, he didn’t chose the buildings or the structures of L’manberg in its entirely over Techno, he chose to better himself and he chose this community of people that he cares about, despite everything. He chose not to be a villain. And i think that’s great. Good lord do I sympathize w/ Techno, and I’m not saying him being upset or you being upset about what he did isn’t valid, I’m just saying just..,... watch his POV before you start making assumptions that are untrue?

2. People shaming Tommy for having an emotional attachment to the disks. Hey, guess what? Have you ever considered that this kid has had everything taken from him? Have you ever considered that everything he’s had was burnt or exploded or destroyed by his enemies, so of course he would hold onto something so desperately because it hasn’t been taken and destroyed in front of his eyes? Have you ever considered that, even for a second? Also, people saying that “what does he care about, his friends or the disks?” he cares about both. He can..,,.. care about both things, if you weren’t aware of that? He cares about the disks because they’re what kept him going when he was suicidal, when Dream was manipulating him; they were the only thing that held good memories and the only thing that gave him a purpose, that gave him something to do. Of course he went too far w/ them, and he acknowledged that, but don’t shit on them when they were basically his lifeline at some point? People tend to forget that his character was literally suicidal; of course he would hang onto something like that because it gave him a point. ....,and it represents his friendships, and the good memories before everything went bad, and people. People he holds so dearly. Once you have that in mind, once you think abt the possibility of the disks representing people, Dream continuously taking them was taking something that represented his friends and his happiness from him.

3. People siding w/ Dream and saying that c!Dream was trying to teach him a lesson. Hey, guys? Do I have to keep repeating myself? Dream admitted that he didn’t have Tommy’s best intentions in mind, he said that he wasn’t his fucking friend — he admitted that he was only hanging out in logstedshire for the fucking disks. Every fucking day Dream would blow up his shit that he worked hard for in front of his eyes, the shit he mined for and was proud of himself for getting? Yeah, every damned day he destroyed every shred of Tommy’s hope he had of getting back on his feet in front of his face — that doesn’t seem like something someone would do who had his best interests in mind. The man lied to him about the party, didn’t even have ghostbur send out the invites so he could convince him nobody fucking cared for him. He lied to him that Tubbo burned the compass to get him to hate Tubbo. He blew up logstedshire when Tommy hid shit from him because he was afraid of what he’d do when he found out — yeah, his home? He blew that shit up. That isn’t something friendly to do. Man pushed this kid to suicide, man manipulated him, man won’t fucking leave him alone because he thinks it is fun to torment him — he is not a good person. All this shit you defend as “teaching him a lesson” just scars him. It’s abuse, is what it is. It’s fucking abuse.

4. Trauma doesn’t give people the excuse to torment people. Hey, we’ve been over this before too, haven’t we? Guess who addressed it? Tommy. He owned up to his actions and said he was using his bad experiences as an excuse to hurt people, he owned up to that shit and said it didn’t give him an excuse. No matter what bad experiences these character go through, you can sympathize w/ it, but it doesn’t give them a fucking excuse to hurt people cause they’re just repeating the fucking cycle. Trauma? Bad experiences isn’t a thing you should hold up as a shield once you’re told that the things you’re doing is wrong. It’s fine when you’re supporting a characters villainous arc, but don’t use their bad experiences as a defense? Trauma doesn’t give you the excuse for vengeance, to hurt people. Even if you’re hurting and you’re angry and you want revenge, the shit that you went through in the past isn’t a defense. It isn’t. I’ve seen a lot of people using it as an excuse in this fandom and it’s 🧍🏼not one...,,??

That’s it. That’s all I have to say. ...,,yes most of it is about c!Tommy. What about it. ...this is literally an inniter blog 🧍🏼/lh /nm

(Also this is just.,, referring to their characters. Yes I do see the fact that I didn’t type “c!” And yes I am too lazy to go back and change it, what about it.)

Also, this isn’t me defending c!Tommy’s shit actions, I’m well aware that he’s done shit things in the past and this isn’t me saying he’s an innocent angel that deserves no criticism, I’m just saying maybe,..., try to understand his POV? Like, for example I do think torturing fundy was going too far, I do think he’s made multiple mistakes and I do think he’s a flawed character, but there’s reasons to his character and I just wisgaiavja. I think he’s neat ok

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apocalypticgargoyle · 3 years

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Hello everyone! (This is kind of long and Im so sorry for that. It's also super late for me too so I apologize if there are a bunch of errors.)

I've come back to numerous asks ranging from intense messages to helpful content.

Instead of posting all 46, I figured I would sum up the majority for all of you with my reactions:

- many of you have been rather uplifting and I appreciate your support, that being said I do not view anything that has been said as hate. everything that has been brought up I am using as insight, advice, and genuine reactions, but thank you to everyone for defending me

- some of you have discussed how I have never answered you, something which I am deeply sorry for and I promise you was not intentional. that being said, if your anon requests were attached to a fic request, more than likely I still have your ask but haven't answered because I plan on fulfilling the request. your anon should still be listed in the anon list (you can find the link on my masterlist and if you still don't see it, PLEASE let me know)

- a lot of you have expressed discomfort with some of my content. im very sorry for this, and (respectfully) I would like to remind everyone that I intentionally tag all of my content in such a way that those tags can be blogged. im very very sorry if you are still seeing things you don't want to see, please let me know if I need to incorporate another tag for other content

- some of you have called me a hypocrite and a gaslighter. im not sure how to respond to this because I guess I can't wrap my brain completely around this and that's my problem that I need to work on. im so sorry if I've been gatekeeping content or if I have been blocking some anons from each other. im sorry if I have been inserting myself into other people's problems. im so sorry if I have made anyone feel invaluable or underappreciated

Moving forward I would like to say that I'm so sorry about all of this. I had a lot of time to think on my shift and part of me wanted to tell everyone that I have a life too and I'm only human. But the rest of me realized that I am your admin and I need to work harder and do better for all of you. I set out to create this blog as a type of haven for everyone, somewhere where people could share their thoughts, ideas, personalities, etc and in the process I've only become another one of those blogs and I am so very sorry.

I really appreciate all of you who came forward to tell me how you were feeling. It takes a lot of courage to do that and if I were in your shoes, I don't think I could. So I commend you and I appreciate everything you all have said. I'm sorry if it seemed like I didn't.

This is the first time I've ever had a blog this big and with so many amazing people. I've never had this kind of feedback and this kind of attention from anyone and I really appreciate all of you and everything you guys have done for this blog.

If I'm being honest, it's kind of disheartening to hear that so many of you have felt left out. It's also kind of disheartening because a lot of you don't even want me to interact anymore so I don't know where that leaves this blog.

Moving forward, I'm going to do what I can to be more inclusive and allow more interactions between anons. Please don't feel the need to include me anymore if you are just here for a certain anon it etc /gen. I-- at the risk of sound like a narcissist, I will still interact when content is directed to me, only because I think I deserve that? At the end of the day, I did make this for my friend and through that process I've made more friends so... If it's okay I would still like to participate sometimes... /lh

Please continue to tell me how you feel and how I can do better. Please tell me about yourself and about what you're into. Tell me anything at all. I will listen to you.

Today has kind of been overwhelming with all of this, and I'm sorry if I'm making this all about me but I feel... kind of gross and I think I need to step back for a bit. This is not because of the anons telling me how they are feeling, this is mainly about those targeting my appearance and my personality and told me that I can't use my blog the way I wanted. I just have a lot to think about and idk. I'm really sorry.

But thank you to the people who have supported me and those who have spoken up. I appreciate all of you and all of you are valid.

Please take care of yourselves everyone, I love you all and I wish you a good night's rest/a great day.

xx Grayce/Gene

#sorry this is a lot to read and is kind of annoying

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