#i left the disk with my father also lmao

[godsiick]

wah im moody and i wanna play the sr reboot but i dont have a fuckin xbox

#mun;; #tbd;; #i left the disk with my father also lmao #i say i wanna play it but last i left off i had to do ventures and those are so hard on my poor baby hands #now an avid gamer bois #idk why theyre so hard for me. i dont remember if they were difficult or if they were just tedious tho

[infernalodie]

I need another one where male reader dies i loved that story and i need ny heart absolutely broken lmao (w maddy perez btw)

𝐓𝐨 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬 || 𝐌𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐳

"𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘓𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦"

Inspo: Murmur - To The Reeds

Pairing: Maddy Perez x Perez!Male!reader

Summary: Payback is all you ever wanted.

Warnings: Bullying and murder.

Words 1225

No one understood why you had been so willing to take everyone’s shit. You were a Perez. The brother of Maddy Perez, the chick who never backed down to anyone. She was confident, but you weren’t. If anything, you were the exact opposite of your sister completely. When danger came, you turned your heel and ran. Never looking back at the chaos that went on with your departure.

But that may have also been why you were good at just being the punching bag of East Highland. Willing to take all the bullshit Nate or anyone else threw at you because you were then taking the attention off the little guys. The kids who couldn’t take what you dealt with on a daily basis.

Maddy tried her best to break you out of this lifestyle. She tried protecting you from Nate, but you always reassured her that you were fine. And she had to watch her own boyfriend beat on her younger brother. Truly, she dreaded each moment she saw you because she knew that she couldn’t do anything besides stand there and watch. Because even if she broke up with Nate in an attempt to protect you, she would always go walking back to Nate.

You never held it against her though. Sure, there were times when you wished to speak up and help her, but she wasn’t home half the time anymore. Out with her friends and leaving you at home to sit in your room, playing your guitar until the tips of your fingertips bled. Or laying on your bed, staring up at the ceiling and listening to music until sleep overcame you.

Tonight though, everything had drastically turned left as you had heard the sound of rustling across the hall. When you had peeked inside, you had spotted Nate with a gun to Maddy’s head. Now, you could’ve very much walked in and stopped it, but you had a different idea.

When Nate came walking out of the house, he found you dragging your house keys along the side of his truck. Eyes growing wide at the notorious punching bag finally swing back in your own terrible way. “What the fuck are you?”

“What the fuck are you doing in my house, Nate?” You barked back furiously. “I hope you know I got all that shit on tape. So, after we’re done here, I’m taking this down to the police station.”

Nate on the other hand did not look convinced by your bold claim. “Bullshit, Y/n,” he laughed. “You wouldn’t dare. Too much of a pussy to do shit.”

“Really?” You smiled. “I sent the video to a friend just in case you break my phone. Just so I have a backup, you know? They’re ready to post it on Instagram and send it to cops the moment I let them know. So, am I bluffing, Nate?”

For a moment, Nate seemed afraid. Genuinely afraid of the consequences of the lengths he had gone to get his father's disk back. But then he remembered…

His finger’s tightened around the handle of his revolver as he levelled it with you. Your eyes widened in shock by the sudden move by the rich kid. “Give me the phone, Y/n.”

“Or what?” You inquired. “You’re going to kill me, Jacobs? And ruin that precious reputation of yours?” A laugh fell from your lips as you shook your head. “Highly-fucking-unlikely, dude-”

Everything went black for a moment but returned. Your body was overwhelmed by the cold, sending shivers up and down your stomach. But then you felt the sharp pain in your stomach, reaching down and seeing your blood paint the palm of your hand. Looking back up at Nate, you saw his expression filled with shock.

A choked groan fell from your lips as your legs gave out beneath you, hitting the pavement on your side. Grey clouds of your warm breath fluttered past your lips as you whimpered, eyes flickering to everything in your view. Feeling Nate fish into your pocket and retrieve your phone and smash it under his foot. You choked on your words, a trembling hand reaching up, a sign to show forgiveness.

And he seemed to think about it for a moment. Staring down at you with rapid breaths as he watched wet pavement begin to take the colour of a dark crimson. But he stepped over your body and got inside his truck. “N-Nate,” you cried, tears stinging the back of your eyes as you felt blood begin to rise in your throat. “Nate, ple- please.”

He didn’t listen, he drove away, leaving you stranded on the road in front of your house. Blood began to slither out from the corner of your mouth as you choked and coughed up blood.

“Y/n!”

That painful scream from your sister sprinting out of the house filled your ears. You were numb, not enough strength to move as you heard her scream out your name. Only being able to choke on sobs and your own blood that filled your mouth.

She reached you, falling to her knees as your eyes flickered to her. “How bad is it?” You coughed, groaning as your sister shook her head.

“You’re okay. We just have to get you to my car and then to the hospital, okay?” She explained in panic breaths.

“Okay.” Something in the way your words was softer and quiet reminded her of when you were younger. When you were on her back as the two of you walked around Highland. Asking her questions about everything you saw. Back then, you were joyful, happy even. When things were simple and you weren’t afraid of anything. Because back then, you had no reason to be afraid.

When she tried lifting you, a sob was ripped from your lungs as you shook your head. “Wait! Wait, wait, wait! It hurts!” You cried, hands desperately grabbing ahold of her arms and holding on for dear life.

Maddy’s heart hammered against her chest as she looked down at your wound. Knowing that the longer the both of you were out in this street, the longer you bled out here, was another moment gone to save you. But when she met your gaze, she found you smiling forcefully, tears streaming down your temples as you choked on blood. “I stood up to him, right?”

Her face scrunched up, one of her hands grabbing ahold of yours and squeezing. “You did,” she said with a sob. “You really did.”

Groaning in pain, you let out a shaky exhale. “I think I’m finally going to get some payback. I think it’s my time, M.”

She sniffled, containing a sob as she watched you glance up at her. “I’m sorry I wasn’t the best little brother,” you cried. “I tried and I know I wasn’t good enough.”

“No. No, you are perfect,” she smiled forcefully. “I couldn’t imagine anyone taking your place. No one could take your place.”

You smiled, swallowing a lump in your throat as you sighed. Maddy watched as the weight in your body grew heavier than before. Eyes wide but focused on open space, igniting the true reality for her.

“Y/n?” She whispered. “Y/n- Hey-!” You laid in her arms unresponsive as she shook her head with a sob. “Y/n!”

#maddy euphoria #maddy perez #maddy perez x reader #maddy perez x male reader #maddy perez euphoria #maddy perez imagine #maddy perez fanfiction #maddy perez angst #maddy perez x perez!male!reader #euphoria #euphoria hbo #euphoria imagine #euphoria s2 #fuck nate jacobs #euphoria x male!reader #x male!reader

[kinetic-elaboration]

April 10: 2x14 Wolf in the Fold

Watched Wolf in the Fold last night. The only thing I really remembered about this ep going in was that it was a Scotty ep. Which is true but also… slightly misleading. Also that it had to do with Jack the Ripper—which is more true than I remembered!

A decadent intro… I get why Spock isn’t here but I actually DO think he would be into it.

Matchmaker Kirk lol.

Scotty is so awkward. This is the other detail I remembered from this ep, actually: how Scotty wants to applaud using his hands no matter what. (Even with those cool lights RIGHT THERE lol). Old Aberdeen pub crawler…

This is honestly such a bizarre back story: Scotty got a concussion because someone who happened to be a woman made a mistake and now not only is his head all funny but he has a “total resentment toward women.” Like okay, nothing creepily sexist in that concept. Also –they ultimately barely even use it! I know it’s the implied rationale for why he would suddenly start murdering women and also not remembering it but it’s like such a flimsy excuse that they never say it out loud in so many words for fear it should sound too stupid. Which it would. Honestly, you really only need the concussion imo. Why go into the weird misogyny thing at all?

And now Kirk and Bons head off to a brothel, giving me a total resentment toward men.

Nice eerie fog out here. Very Aberdeenian.

Okay, so this woman was stabbed a dozen times but she only screamed once? And then a second later, Scotty had somehow teleported several feet away, still holding the knife? He’s good at his job but he’s not that good. This is already deeply suspicious.

“Therapeutic shore leave.” Trying to cure his hatred of ladies lmao.

So this weird little bald man, Hengist, from Rigel IV. Is he an alien? I suppose he must be. Rigellians are a race, as we know from Journey to Babel. It’s not always clear to me which groups of people are Earth colonists who have migrated to or been born on other planets and which are humanoid aliens.

The Aurelians are a gentle, harmless people. Cute. I like these aliens.

I wish we could hire aliens to be our administrators. Alien Overlord and Taylor.

“I’ll be taking over, since I am the highest official.” He out-officialed him.

I like this guy and his slightly creepy empath priestess wife. I feel like Spock would like them, too.

Speaking of: Spock in the captain’s chair. Hot.

I don’t get how this planet is the only space port around. Like… could not any planet be a space port? What does that even mean?

Oh no, a woman with the lie detector machine! She must be incompetent and/or to be despised.

I love Sybo’s outfit. Her hair and jewelry too. Honestly just a great head-to-toe look.

Another murder! Sorry but this one is on the Aurelian for just leaving the murder weapon out there unattended.

Generally speaking, the costume and set people are doing allllll the work in this episode.

Hengist went to look for suspects and he came up with the victim’s father and fiancé?? He’s not even trying lol. Anyway, he obviously did it.

How can you NOT tell if a lock was picked or not? I mean I know McCoy is a doctor, not a locksmith, but come on. It can’t be that ambiguous.

Spooky mumbo-jumbo.

Interesting that Spock doesn’t trust the mumbo-jumbo either. I guess he only approves of it when it’s Vulcan.

When Sybo says “monstrous evil” the camera is looking right at Hengist. Not suspicious at all. He’s only clearly railroading Scotty, looked right at the second victim before she was killed, was in the perfect position to take the murder weapon after it was carelessly left about, and is the most obvious non-Scotty suspect here.

I love how loyal Bones is. He literally saw Scotty holding Sybo and the knife with blood on his hands and is like “It’s impossible he could have done it.”

So many of the “truth discovery” devices on TOS are truly creepy. Like they’re all clear plot devices, and for that reason depicted as completely reliable, and the more completely reliable they are, the more deeply disturbing they become upon any reflection at all.

That’s a pretty computer though. All those pretty flashing lights! And it runs on floppy disks.

I literally just remembered what happened.

“Scotty, lie to me, how old are you?” / “Twenty-two, Sir.” Yeah, I’d say that’s a lie.

So like this allegedly all-powerful computer is literally just a lie detector. That’s it! A lie detector that picks up on psychological signs of lying, just like our lie detectors today. I mean… you could have just said that straight out. All they do is show what a person believes to be true, so in the case where someone truly doesn’t remember something, the usefulness is… limited.

My mom suggested a Vulcan mind meld which, actually, would pretty much solve the problem! But for once Spock actually treats it like something serious and not to be thrown out as a solution to all problems at the merest suggestion.

Someone needs to do a fashion line based entirely on the Argellian outfits.

Spock is internally eye-rolling at all this drama. I feel like he’s a real advocate for the computers today. That’s like… really his only role.

The computer’s linguistics banks don’t know what this word means? Maybe we should get Uhura on the case.

Plot twist: the killer was Jack the Ripper the WHOLE TIME! The last one you’d ever expect.

I don’t get how the computer made the leap from Redjac to Jack the Ripper since that is not a real word and no one outside of this episode of TOS has ever used it for Jack the Ripper.

“Everyone feeds on death, even vegetarians.” So dark, Spock. So emo.

Aw, alien creatures that derive sustenance from love. Adorable. There should have been an episode devoted to them. (Wait a minute…. Idea coming on…)

Speaking of gaseous cloud aliens…the Companion?

This episode really relies a lot on the computer to provide information and otherwise move the plot along.

Kirk keeps ignoring everyone to just talk to Spock.

“Cloud the issue” lol that’s a good pun. (Already can’t remember who said it but… point stands.)

The cloud entity feeds on women because they are more easily and deeply terrified. That sounds fake but okay. It’s also not in keeping with what Sybo said, is it? She mentioned a hatred of women. That’s not the same as finding women useful.

Hmm, when do we get our Martian Colonies, @ perseverance?

Oh, Rigel IV, you say? There seems to be a Rigellian right here!

This whole history of the entity is bizarre. The first killing sprees (that we know of) are on Earth, and Kirk specifically says that when man left Earth to explore, he took this with him. Does that mean… the cloud creature/entity originated on Earth? Truly a bizarre hypothesis, when you think about it.

Are you the entity, Sir?

There is actually very little Scotty in this Scotty-centric episode.

Lol the knife originates with the hill people of Rigel IV. What is this, Deliverance?

Omg Kirk punched the entity right out of that man!

So to summarize: “Jack the Ripper is actually a gaseous cloud that is capable of infecting the computer system of the Enterprise, thus hijacking the whole ship” is the basic, wacky concept of this episode.

This tranquilizer could quiet a volcano. Where was it during the volcano scene in STID hmm?

Kirk’s plan to keep people from being scared by the maniacal voice of the entity: Tranquilize the entire ship. That’s why he’s paid the big bucks.

Yet another twist on the old Kirk v. Computer plot. Time to use Math to defeat it.

Kirk is so unimpressed with the entity. “Eh, shut that off.” He would not be moved by a haunted house.

“This is the first time I’ve heard a malfunction threaten us.” Sulu can man his post AND be funny; he’s multi-talented.

Kirk and Spock don’t need tranquilizers because they’re smart enough to know this high-pitched voice yelling random threats just isn’t actually scary.

Kirk is really insistent that Sulu man his frickin’ post!

Oh no, not PI!! My nemesis, PI!

I’m really living for Sulu here.

If the entity entered a tranquilized person, it might take up knitting. I gotta say, that doesn’t make any sense as a plot point but I like it anyway.

That was a very efficient tranquilizing job! Everyone in a 400+ person ship in like 10 minutes? Get the medical team on the Enterprise in charge of the vaccine distribution stat.

Kirk just outright assumes that Spock won’t be a hospitable entity choice. And he’s not even wrong! The entity chooses the dead body over Spock or Kirk. It knows when it’s not wanted.

Hengist has been revived!

The entity is honestly, truly hilarious. Die, die, everybody die! Kill! Kill you all! Maniacal laughter! All while being carried by a still utterly unimpressed Kirk down the halls of the ship.

Spock’s like “get out of the way, you tranquilized idiot. Got some entity-scattering to do.”

“I gave them a pretty big shot, Jim!” Think you might have slightly overdone it, Bones? You didn’t need to make everyone useless for 6 hours for a problem that was solved in 5 minutes!

This is one of those moments, Kirk trying to get Spock to see the pretty ladies with him, when Spock seems super gay. Like, I don’t even think he is, that’s not my reading of him, and I also assume that wasn’t the intention here, but that’s just so clearly how it reads.

Aw, Kirk doesn’t want to go the strip club alone. Poor bb.

Weird how Lt. Leslie was in this when he died in the last episode.

Overall, I’d actually have to say that was a very crack-y episode. I liked the ending the best because it was so ridiculous.

What I don’t understand, in addition to whether or not the entity was really supposed to be from Earth, was how it came to be Hengist. Like, it can enter and leave bodies (or computers) at will, so perhaps it just entered Hengist, a normal Rigellian, at some point. But if that’s so, putting him on the transporter and scattering him into space was a pretty cruel thing to do. Also, why did he die (or appear to die) when the entity wasn’t in him? That implies he is the entity’s physical form. But then, first of all, how is also a Rigellian? Like did the entity mate with a Rigellian? Did the entity take over a baby Rigellian? Did the entity just claim to be Rigellian but is really just humanoid in its physical form—we did establish that some aliens, like this one, or creatures or whatever, are gaseous sometimes and solid others, so maybe its solid form is humanoid. Which would fit well with it originating in Earth, although that also brings a new and perhaps unintentional layer of creepiness to the story. I have to assume that’s the situation, but still, wild. And it doesn’t explain this: why does Hengist “die” when the entity “leaves” him, as opposed to just disappear entirely when the entity changes form??

Anyway, I know I’m overthinking this very wacky premise. Overall, I think the episode was fine. It didn’t have enough Scotty (for being a “Scotty episode”) and it changed genres an awful lot for 50 minutes. There was a tad too much misogyny going on. And overall I didn’t feel like the characters—even Kirk, and in actuality this was a Kirk episode much more than a Scotty episode, and purposefully so—were at their most interesting. Tbh Sulu ultimately stole the show in the final minutes.

Next up is the Trouble with Tribbles! Also a funny episode but at least undeniably purposefully so!

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #star trek tos #wolf in the fold

[confusedgoldenflower]

An Aftermath Etched into Souls

Fandom: Ancient Egyptian Religion

Relationships: Ash/Set (Ancient Egyptian), Horus/Set, Seth/Heru, Setekh/Heru, Nebuty/Setekh, Aset/Wesir, Ash/Horus, Nebuty/Heru, Ash/Seth/Horus, Nebuty/Setekh/Heru

Characters: Ra (Ancient Egyptian), Horus (Ancient Egyptian), Set (Ancient Egyptian), Ash (Ancient Egyptian), Thoth (Ancient Egyptian), Nephthys (Ancient Egyptian), Isis (Ancient Egyptian), Osiris (Ancient Egyptian), Wesir | Osiris (Ancient Egyptian), Setekh | Seth (Ancient Egyptian), Heru | Horus (Ancient Egyptian), Nebuty | Ash (Ancient Egyptian), Aset | Isis (Ancient Egyptian), Nebet-Het | Nephthys (Ancient Egyptian), Djehuty | Thoth (Ancient Egyptian), Ap/o/phis (Ancient Egyptian), Shu (Ancient Egyptian), Tefnut (Ancient Egyptian), Nut (Ancient Egyptian), Geb (Ancient Egyptian), Anubis (Ancient Egyptian), Yinpu | Anubis (Ancient Egyptian), Ammit (Ancient Egyptian), Heru-Wer | Horus the Elder (Ancient Egyptian), Horus the Elder (Ancient Egyptian)

Other Tags: Soulmates, because why not, I'm spicing up the fandom, LMAO, Slow Burn, ? - Freeform, Idk I have no patience though, we'll see how it goes, Natural laws mean nothing, they're gods, I ain't gonna tell them no, Post Contendings: Ancient Egyptian Mythos, Ancient Egyptian Literature & Mythology, Ancient Egyptian Deities, Ancient Egypt, Wing fluff, Wing Grooming, Wings, Magic, Transfiguration

Summary: After the Contendings between them, Heru (Horus) and Setekh (Seth/Set) go their separate ways. Heru goes to his father's throne, and Setekh tries to consolidate everything that has happened in the last few centuries; what happened prior to the birth of the five siblings. There is much to reflect upon and the past decades left lasting damages of various kinds for everyone. Ra sees this and makes an executive decision on how he thinks they can heal--or heal one another... binding two souls or hearts together.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32563603

Chapter One: Reunion of Hearts

“You’ve returned....”

Setekh turned from the blood stained sunrise to look at the temple oasis he had found himself not able to approach any further. The voice was gentle. Oh, so gentle. It had been that way for so long even in his vague glimpses of memory.

“I thought you’d forgotten about me… us…?”

He smiled kindly, or as kindly as he could for as far as a deity of bloodshed and burning sand is capable of gentleness. His heart wavered.

“Nebuty, I… glimpses, only, but I remember. I only want to know how you are and then I will be off.”

The figure a couple dozen paces away stumbled forward as if pushed. He stepped closer, but his outstretched arms caught nothing in the air.

“No, stay! If you can… I would like that.”

The Great God of the Sahara never found himself at a loss for words but…, “after all that has happened and all I have done?”

There was a lapse in spoken words as their eyes bore into one another’s. The wind stirred the sand forward. Surely the Lord of Oases had overheard the gossiping of travelers by then.

“You don’t remember our last night together? I know that even reborn as you were, you would never do something like that--or anything else. It is the humans and their scribes and their allegiances to stories.” Setekh couldn’t bear to stare into those eyes and so he looked away. The figure moved, bare feet against the limestone and then gently crunched on the sand. A warmth took over his hand.

“At least stay today? Please?”

An exhale akin to a sigh and dying breath left him then and the corners of his lips turned up. Setekh was pulled into Nebuty’s temple without struggle.

Frankincense and sandalwood wafted beautifully strong through the limestone corridors. It made the dry heat tolerable, at least that’s what a human may say, but for the specific deities of the desert and the oasis, this was ideal. Nebuty, however pleasantly thriving in such a state well into the desert, did not look over the many humans that kept up the temple and devoted themselves to him. They were all so very dear to him; such special spirits that were free to take from his oasis what they would. They also shied away from the villainous red haired god of calamity, eyeing him warily as he walked with their lord.

It didn’t go unnoticed by either, how the humans reacted. Setekh pretended he didn’t see any humans at all and Nebuty’s heart was saddened as he recalled the desecration of Setekh’s own temples generations ago. No human would be old enough to remember it. Not now. But gods remembered and gods could be hurt by men.

He swallowed hard as his temple faded to heaps of burnt offerings, incense and objects alike aflame with broken chairs and tables, even effigies of Setekh. What wasn’t able to be burnt was looted and subsequently melted down or otherwise brutally disfigured. He’d knelt there and wept and lost all notion of time before a cousin came to rouse him. That had hurt even more for his dearly beloved’s name had been spat in hate already. So much so that he couldn't even recall the exact god that came to him. Shouldn’t they have known?

“Nebuty,” a chest thrummed deeply like the whirling thumps of a distant sand storm. He blinked and registered his home and his beloved who looked back at him with a face that had learned to color such emotions as concern. He merely nodded and offered a smile for them both as he shuffled a bit closer. Setekh didn’t protest or push him away.

As a singer’s ethereal voice reverberated off the painted plastered walls and ceilings, he led the other to the rooms where he liked to stay. The temple attendants were ushered out. Then they were alone.

Nebuty stared into Setekh’s blood red eyes, the color he painted the morning sky after slaying the truly evil serpent bent on utter destruction of creation. His skin prickled and he fought the urge to sway on his feet like an uncertain adolescent. Why was this silence so… wrong?

“We have much to talk about?”

Setekh sighed heavily and let his eyes close as he looked away, “I have grown so weary of talk; that is all they do!” He growled while stalking away then stopped abruptly. Nebuty stepped toward him.

“It isn’t my intention to bring this into your temple,” but those eyes still hadn’t come back to look into his. He missed that boring depth. That perfect but miniature reflection of the desert.

“I brought you into my temple and so I have brought your troubles here as well. Stay,” he added quickly, before Setekh could make argument and leave, “let yourself be rejuvenated here.”

Setekh nodded silently. Nebuty grabbed some wine as he led the other to the richly decorated, sha-headed couch.

“All this time, how have you been?”

He smiled quietly to himself, Setekh never was good at serious conversation.

“It’s lonely out here but it is home… you make it so.”

Setekh was silent, staring at nothing. Those swirling red eyes were shining with thought. Neither of them ever really needed much conversation anyway, and so Setekh vaguely felt himself pulled down to sit beside Nebuty.

“You want me to stay?” The words were certain, almost harsh but he had long ago hidden his heart away.

Nebuty leaned against him even in the sweltering heat, “of course I want for you to stay with me… again.” The silence stretched long. The singer had long since passed over the first song. Eventually, he allowed himself to relax against the other and, “breathe in such bliss after so long.” Nebuty didn’t risk injury to Setekh’s scattered emotions by telling him he had spoken allowed, only basked with him in one another’s company.

~~~@%*^*%@~~~

“Yes, yes, I am well aware we are all exhausted from recent events,” Ra began with a brief pointed look at Heru, “but I have decided something. And while it is my doing, I do not have dictation over it; no one does.”

“Well?” He questioned in the height of Ra’s summer heat grabbing them even in the shade of the stone ceiling.

“I have decided to tie souls together.” Ra paused without elaboration. He was no doubt where Setekh inherited his, albeit enhanced, air for dramatics. A hush of steely whispers passed over the assembled deities.

“So if one of the souls dies, the other does as well?” Setekh questioned, seemingly bored. He had his head rested on a hand and the elbow on the table. He hadn’t touched his wine. Heru had, it was the only thing that was borderline cool. Ra regarded his distant offspring with what could only be described as an air of some sort of affection.

“No. Merely, souls that have been aligned; I know not who neither can I transfer nor repeal it. But each of you will know. I see my grandchildren Nut and Geb have-.”

“And yet you separate us!” Came the son’s envenomed words, “but the space between earth and sky must remain.” Shu, their father, interrupted, unperturbed.

“As I was saying,” Ra regained the conversation and Heru imagined the feathers of the solar disk bearing falcon to be ruffled and hassled in annoyance. A sip of wine hid his small smile.

“You will know when you know. It is to be happy, children, all this strife and violence has greatly weighed upon me and I have little doubt, you all as well. So I made a solution. What say you of my ingenious idea, Setekh?”

“I’m not sure, allow me to ask Pharoah,” Setekh smirked pettily as he turned his head to Heru who took in a breath and set down his goblet, he could feel his mother’s dissatisfaction radiating off of her form, though he had no choice but to agree.

“I am not sure as of yet, this is new and quite impulsive,” he jabbed at Ra.

The elder creator deity chuckled, “More so than you questioning the wisdom of those older than you? I have been thinking on this for a very long time.” Djehuty nodded his approval from nearby. Setekh’s eyes shone with a certain sort of amusement.

Heru’s eyes narrowed, “and the point of this? How could forcibly tying us together possibly see an end to violence.”

“Mated souls,” was the only reply.

His mother raved audibly when they left and returned to their new home, the royal palace. He listened silently, taking note of everything she said. He spoke when her acceptance of a ripe fig gave pause to her ranting.

“Can you feel who you are attached to?”

Her brief pause in chewing gave indication of her thinking, “...your father.” He smiled.

“We did not need Ra’s bizzare intervention to tell us that we love each other,” she remarked quietly.

“Does he know?”

“Oh, yes, I told the winds to tell him what happened earlier.”

Had he been too caught up in thought to have missed that? He had been sure he had been listening attentively but….

“This is just a ploy for Ra to stay relevant, there is nothing to worry for.” She sighed out, fire gone.

“Come now, you still have meetings to attend, my son, the day is not yet over.”

He obeyed and saw to his duties, but he did feel as if there was something to worry for. The air was hot and his body was sweating, yet he felt oddly cold. Like being alone without anyone around to offer even so much as just their presence. It chilled his bones.

“Mother,” he asked when they were finally left alone, “how can you tell it is father that your heart is tied to?” Her head tilted slightly, a tick that his father once told him endeared her to him beyond reason.

“It is a softness… a lingering… somehow so difficult to describe. But… I feel almost wrong here and know that I would be perfectly content with his company.”

“I see.... I think I will go for a walk.”

She revered him for a few seconds, “alright. Be safe, my son.”

“I always am. I love you.”

Her smile stretched almost triumphantly like it had when they’d won over Setekh, “I love you more.”

He transformed into a falcon and departed her company. Aimlessly soaring through Shu’s separation almost stripped away the day’s trials and tribulations. How many days had it been anyway? Since he’d been fully blessed with his father’s inheritance…. No matter, he was doing well under Aset’s careful tutelage and the country’s people were satisfied with their new monarch. He watched them, his people, moving around on the ground. Adults were working still as there was some light yet left and small children ran about, doing away with their last energy stores to be put to sleep easily. It made his heart happy in a way that filled him so much that he couldn’t breath almost.

Temples and Faiyums passed below him. Rich and poor alike were blessing the incoming night and burnt offerings of resin were already being lit. An air currant brought him down to zip between the mud brick houses. Although he was not recognized in such a form without great procession, the children shrieked with delight. Some dogs gave chase, and the cats could hardly care about him in favor of the vermin that were ruining food stores. He rode the current down to where he no longer had any lift, then transformed back into his humanoid form.

“Here,” he whispered as he touched a column in the shade of the stone structure. So many memories… so many-.... just, so much. He hadn’t cared to hide himself from the view of mortals for they knew better than to enter even the radius of the place.

“Are you looking for Setekh?” Heru jumped at the sudden and unfamiliar voice, “he is not here, and it may be best to leave him be, at least for quite some time.”

He stared at the other deity, sure he had had some sort of knowledge about their entire and sprawling family by then, but he could not identify the other.

“Oh, pardon me, Pharaoh.” The other added with his kind face and soothing voice.

Heru finally came out of his shock, “and you are?”

“Nebuty.”

“Beloved of Setekh,” Heru thought aloud.

“Yes,” Nebuty smiled. Silence lapsed between them as the shadows stretched further and further on the limestone floor.

“You do have eyes like the Great Green Sea beneath a bright sky,” Nebuty finally said, seemingly impervious to the awkwardness of their transaction. It was then that Heru realized that the sun must have been shining off of one of his eyes as it sank below the Western sands.

“Thank you…. Ah, I am not familiar with you…?”

A brief look of panic, realization and shock passed over the other’s face, “I stay in my temple within the sands of the desert. I came out for… the first time in a long time to see everything even if it hurt….” Nebuty’s voice trailed sorrowfully off as he turned to stare in the western direction despite the still blinding solar disk.

“Within his desert? It pains you?” Something akin to a mounting dread weighed Heru’s stomach down and bound his feet to the floor.

“Yes, well, it is good to see Kemet in good order. The people are happy and the harvests seem bountiful. I am glad.” Before he could think, he found his hand closed around the other’s arm as Nebuty had turned West to return to where he claimed he came from.

“Wait… how can you be in Setekh’s desert?!” He motioned towards said landscape to give emphasis to his words but nearly stopped short when his keen eyes noticed a roiling tension.

“His anger has been peaked by today’s meeting, you cannot go now!” He continued.

“It may also be because you grabbed me,” Nebuty returned calmly. Heru blinked a few times. This was so beyond anything he had experienced up to that point.

“You need not fear for my well being,” Nebuty pulled Heru’s hand off of him, “I am actually safer within those fiery parameters he lords over.” Heru watched Nebuty, the one that was the beloved of Setekh, walk away and disappear into the darkness both of night and the sandstorm.

He shook himself from his shock and resolved to focus on promising punishment if the storm came into the Black Lands and harmed people or farms.

Yes, that would have to be sufficient… but then why was there such a deeply set chill that night?

~~~@%*^*%@~~~

“Anything of note?” Setekh asked immediately in the shelter he made for them in his sand storm.

“The people are happy and the country is protected,” Nebuty returned. Setekh gave a curt nod before beginning their way home. Only then did it occur to him that what he had said had offended the other. I know you are a fine king. But he knew better than to press that particular matter.

“Any trouble?”

“No, I hid myself from the humans’ gaze. However, I recognized Heru.” Setekh stopped and whirled around. The storm around them spiked in veracity.

“He came back to the meeting place. I know not why but assumed it had to do with you, considering the place’s utter emptiness and all but certain locations for everyone else but you.”

“What did he say,” Setekh demanded and if it wasn’t for those decades they had spent together and the longing in his heart, he might have flinched.

“He was confused and did not know me, then was worried for me when I had to depart. Perhaps he went back to try and make sense of Ra’s declaration? Humans often say it helps to be in the location where something happened.”

Those fiery eyes that somehow reflected light well into the darkness of night looked beyond him then, squinted. He took a clenched fist into his hands.

“Come, I am sure we are both tired from today’s happenings.”

The other bodily folded around him then, “you spent too long away.”

“Hmmm,” he responded and closed his eyes into the embrace. This was where he belonged, and where his heart was whole.

#Egypt fanfic #Kemet fanfic #Set #Heru #Ash #Nebuty #Setekh #Horus #Have a good day and stay safe #friends!

[finsterhund]

Here lies 2018, a creatively bankrupt year for Finsterhund, but maybe that is for the best.

This year was um... bad... I think. But that doesn't stop me from really being hopeful for the future. I have a dark confession though. I feed off of negativity in a way that scares me and I don’t know how to face it.

Here’s my thoughts about the past year and my hopes for the future. Warning: it gets dark.

This year we moved into a “temporary house” another one, but this time it was one I actually cried because of how much I was actively afraid to live here. That didn't convince my roommates though lmao. No proper bedroom lighting, having to walk through a dark forest to get to the bus stop, and suspicious neighborly activities were things that I had to deal with here. It is oh so fortunate that I will be moving.

After 2017; the Year of Wannabe, being lied to about my dog dying, and getting groomed by someone who was nice to me on the internet (again) I was an emotional wreck. I was paranoid that abusive people like Wannabe, his artist, my dad, the guy I thought was my friend, and others similar might cause issue or be even more of a problem this year. Fortunately, the horrible fears I assumed may transpire and ruin everything did not rip through Internet Land(tm) but I was still kept in a constant state of paranoia.

The antifandom didn't return either, with the exception of a vindictive troll called Zachary. You’ll probably notice that my posts about him trailed off relatively recently. It was revealed that he was dealing with verbally abusive parents. While they don’t excuse his actions, they certainly explained them. I only hope with time he gets out of that environment and learns to express opinions in a healthy way. That’s something I still struggle with. For similar reasons.

A youtube gaming channel did play HoD and spread some false allegations against the game’s devs “as a joke” which was pretty sick and not actually a joke. False allegations are bad. They diminish when people do actual real bad things and make the people who do those bad things feel empowered to say “you are just a call out post maker who hates free speech” and things like that. But fortunately, people who aren't completely stupid didn't believe it.

So despite nothing really serious happening this year, I was still considerably anxious. My mental state has been slowly and surely getting worse every year I’m not medicated, and my physical health has been blatantly declining too. The symptoms of my weaker immune system have been getting worse, and my appetite has been getting bigger. I've found out recently that unlike regular depression and most mental illnesses and disorders, cabin fever can cause heightened appetite and food cravings. For the longest time I felt invalid because my mental illnesses are supposed to take away my appetite, not make it worse, but by finally acknowledging that I suffer from longterm cabin fever, I've come to terms with the fact that it does indeed make sense.

Now to find a way of dealing with cabin fever... haha... ha...ha.

But my situation left me creatively bankrupt. Paranoid, anxious, and very tired. I still did draw and try to write, but that gradually became harder and harder as my laptop began to fail in the summer. In fall, finally, when Microsoft forced that October update, the hard disk stopped for good, and I lost the considerable amount of things left that I hadn't yet backed up. Despite getting a replacement that I can still draw and write with, a big chunk of my passion died with that hard disk. I’m very sentimental, I don’t let go of things easily. The end of an era can make it so that the new era takes way too long to start up from the rubble.

Interestingly enough however, is that the same creative affliction and severe negative downward spiral that killed my ability to draw and write after the death of my laptop also happened to Wannabe’s Artist, for no reason, who sub sequentially just started tanking emotionally. This is something I've noticed a few times. The people who hurt me having bad things happening to them that follow the same trend of bad things happening to me. Wannabe’s computer being plagued by the same Windows 10 updates that killed mine, Wannabe’s Artist losing her passion.

I've come to the conclusion that the reason why the universe forces me to suffer is in order to make the evil people who have done bad things to me suffer as well. It’s a form of balance. I must take the same bullet that they do. I know this is likely my paranoia and psychosis talking, but I really feel that if karma does exist, that is how it works. I take comfort in my suffering, because it has to be this way. Good can only exist because of suffering also existing. If I am to be a lighting rod, I hope that the good that comes as a result of my pain is powerful and beneficial to the other people who receive it.

The internet censorship has gotten worse, but considering where I stand on certain issues now, part of me thinks that’s for the best. Am I willing to sacrifice certain freedoms in order to ensure that evil people don’t feel welcome? Well, I don’t know, but it was nice seeing Wannabe’s Artist almost get banned from multiple websites and actually get banned from several. She made a new tumblr account and it promptly got banned. She made ANOTHER new tumblr account and lost in in the purge. Despite me not liking censorship, there’s a strange poetic justice watching it claim someone you don’t like as the result of nothing more than their own actions.

It’s strange how perspective can change how you think about things. Your world view can shift with one different experience. I hope that I have not been permanently shifted into being a combative person because of this.

There’s a really strange and extremely malicious and negative but still gratifying comfort in knowing that awful people who ruined your life are suffering just the same as you. We all are little mortal beings made of flesh being buffeted around by a cold uncaring world. It was the same feeling I got watching the security footage of my predator birth father being tasered after punching a police officer. Police brutality is wrong, I’ll never say it isn't. But the fact that it is wrong doesn't mean that he didn't deserve it. There’s a sickness deep in my heart to derive enjoyment in the suffering of others, something that I feel destroys what little purity I've managed to hold onto and hoard away and value so highly as a remnant of what I used to be, but I don’t know how to fight it. It feels instinctive to be honest, like gratification or release. I’d like to say that only genuinely awful people suffering make me feel like this, but even some people who I just don’t like will have bad things happen and I’ll have to stop myself from feeling enjoyment from it. Is there a way to cure this? Prevent it? Is it selfishness or is it entirely subconscious? How do I even start not feeling this way. I don’t know. I don’t want it in my life. I want it to stop. But it just fills me before I have a chance to tell myself it’s wrong.

Do I feel awful, guilty, and ashamed that I feel this way? Of course. Do I know that it’s wrong to feel this way? Also yes. At this point though, my vicious hatred of those who have done me wrong is a very powerful motivator. To live just to spite them, to go through hardships to sit back and watch them do the same. To see that those my paranoia-riddled brain deems “powerful beings of abuse” being tripped and cut and crushed by the same mortal perils that make it hard for me to keep on going is a better psychosis cure than anything I've had access to this year. “If it bleeds, we can kill it” that sort of thing. Humanizing these big imposing evils by remembering that they are people, just like me, is the key to getting over my fear of them. The same problems I face are faced by them. How then can they be agents sent by an organization or monsters specifically created by the universe to torment me? We’re all just little dudes. Them included.

I hope with time I can learn to stop delighting in the hardships of others, even if these people are bad, have done bad things, or have done me wrong. It’s a toxic mentality to have those thoughts, even if it’s the fire I need to dig myself out of the pits I've fallen down into.

This year I “lost” a good friend of mine. Lili. I have no way of knowing if you are safe, if you have gotten better, and I refuse to entertain the alternative. You stopped coming online completely and I briefly received anonymous messages from a relative saying you were deathly sick, then nothing. I think of you every day and pray you are alright. I miss you a lot. I hope you’re happy and healthy wherever you are.

This year I had a friend have a cancer scare, and I lost someone I had grown to consider a friend at the beginning of spring to cancer in the summer. I don’t know how to process it. I don’t handle death properly. I've more so been numb and in denial of it. I’m afraid of losing people I care about. They’re the only good in the world to me.

I deny my own mortality, I joke about it, I crave it. But it comes into my mind when I’m trying to sleep too. Apparently I have just short of ten years left, if estimations about atrophy are to be believed. But I am not a statistic, I’m a person. I think “Since I am going to die soon anyways why couldn't I die instead of this person? Why couldn't I be in the hospital. This person deserves to live. They do good in the world. What will I do?” But at the same time, I think “How will I manage to live my dreams in just ten years. How will I have a full life? Maybe they’re wrong and I’ll be 100 years old when I am dead. But what if it is true and I’m just starting to live when it ends? What happens when it ends?” Every year pushes me closer to facing that, and I don’t know how. Once my metabolism slows, what will that mean for my heart? Will it be another fluke where “life finds a way” or will they be right this time? It scares me. It really does. My current plans are expecting that I will need mobility assistance devices then. I deny the expedited mortality. But I think about how I haven’t accomplished much and I feel a strong sense of loss.

Unfortunately, and probably a big reason for my downward spiral was that I set my hopes up for something this year that wouldn't happen, and didn't happen.

2018 Marked the 20th anniversary for Heart of Darkness, and I practically begged and pleaded to the universe, wished on every wishing star, and did everything short of selling my soul for a remake, sequel, art book, remaster, anything.

Needless to say, these efforts were in vain. I watched as other beloved games that I had fond memories of like Spyro and Crash got remastered, hoping and pleading that HoD would follow suit.

And it didn't.

I set myself up for disappointment, which ended up making me feel hopeless as the “Great Heart of Darkness Year” could never have turned out like I had wanted. My mentality for life is usually “expect the least, always be pleasantly surprised when something happens” but for this year I let optimism and hope fly a bit out of control, and sooner or later if it’s not met with real results it’s going to come crashing down.

I’m making it sound like the year was completely awful only made bearable by it also being awful for my mortal enemies, but that wouldn't be entirely true.

I got some really good art at cons, from friends, and just regular fan art that other fans have made and posted. I did get to do some fun things every once in a while, even if my seasonal depression has numbed them all in my mind right now. I’ll come back to this post and add them.

Right at the beginning of the year, (or was it the end of the last year?) I got to have a skype call with Eric. THE ERIC. And he complimented my Andy hat. I didn't post my write up about the call because I felt it wouldn't be fair to overshadow such a wonderful event with all the negativity that was happening at the time the post was finished. So I waited... and waited... and waited... and never did post it. Maybe I should rectify that. And rewrite the post because it was on my old laptop when it died OTL I felt bad because due to my inability to sleep at night I probably looked exhausted to Eric. I hope he didn't think I was bored. But he made HoD, and it’s blatantly obvious how closely I identify to Andy, so it’s likely he understood the reason I looked like a zombie. Sorry Eric. I was excited beyond belief inside. I just didn't let it out verbally for fear of being rude.

We did get to see the Saturn disc. It helped me retain some positivity after this holiday season drug me down into a dark hole.

Was it this year that I got my computer chair? It might not have been but I’m so thankful for how it saved my back and stopped my chronic pain from making it impossible for me to sit and draw that I’ll thank it anyway. Thank you chair.

I’m really grasping at straws but I know there were lots of things I just can’t remember now. I’ll add them later.

My friend Fishy(Rob) was absolutely incredible to me for the entire year. Offering great headcanons, compassionate support, words of encouragement, and donating to me to always ensure the HoD website stays online forever. For Christmas he also sent me Tiny, who I’d like to say has finally gotten along with Whisky stuffy and they can share my bed now no problem. I also report that I loved all the candy he sent me and it was all amazing and I’m now a fan of macadamia nuts. It’s because of Fishy that I didn't completely lose my passion for writing and drawing. I’m going to be posting my finished fanfic after I sleep this morning.

I mean it when I say that Fishy is one of the last great lighthouses shining in the horrible turbulent storm that is whatever the hell my existence has become at this point. Every day I think about how we are friends and it makes me feel happy.

This year I reconnected with my oldest friendship. My funky mushroom pal XP I hope we will get to visit again sometime soon.

I did try to remain close with my friends, but I feel I did drift apart from some friends. I know it’s not either of our faults, life happens, but I want you to know that it wasn't your fault. I just got tired all the quicker this year. Slow, tired, easily overwhelmed. Hopefully next year I can be energetic and close. That’s how I want to be.

My resolutions for this year are probably still the same or similar to last year but I forgot what they were.

Stop being so paranoid and obsessive and scared.

Don’t give up on creative endeavors

Maintain and strengthen my friendships

Get my service dog

Get medications. That’s really important.

Get to see doctors regularly. With my issues I should be seeing one once a month. I haven’t seen one in over a year.

Do things, eat things, see things more

L I V E

Stop taking everything so seriously.

Talk more to Fishy and my friends in general.

Stand up for myself, even to people who are in authority or who I trust.

Learn to let things go.

Make some great HoD stuff.

Don’t put off fun things like video games because I don’t feel I “deserve” them.

Permanently kill the part of me that delights in the suffering of others. I don’t know how, but I’m gunna try. I want to be pure again, and as much as I feel that that was stolen from me, it’s mine to reclaim and I've just gotta work hard for it.

Purity is a state of mind. I need to live that state of mind and realize that that will be infinitely more important than biting and lashing out in an effort to “avenge” it.

With that being said, I really do feel that a lot of my problems can be negated by having access to mental health specialists, doctors, medicine, fresh air, things to do, exercise, and more regular meals. I hope that the new year will bring more availability to these things as they will prove to be very important in improving my health and mood.

In closing, I am immensely grateful for my friends, for Heart of Darkness, for the people who made Heart of Darkness, for dogs, for art, for the internet (only sometimes, other times it’s a curse), for food, for iced tea, and for the good moments this year had because of these things. As always, thank you for the people who stayed with me despite this severe turbulence. I really cannot begin to thank you for your patience. Staying with me despite how I am shows a lot of faith that I still have a chance to improve and get better and live life on the right track. Thank you for believing in me. I’ll try not to let you down in 2019.

Love you all.

#text post #long post #2018 in review #negative #thanks guys

[kinetic-elaboration]

February 10: 2x06 The Doomsday Machine

Took a nap after work and really discombobulated myself. Then got a bit of a second wind watching Star Trek.

I believe I have seen this episode before but I had no memory of it going in and no memory of seeing it before even now that I’ve finished, so, who knows?

Where’s Uhura? Hopefully on shore leave somewhere having fun!

I feel like this other Communications officer walked over to the Captain’s chair hoping Kirk would acknowledge her lol. Then when he doesn’t, she doesn’t really know what to do with herself.

Some of the shots in this opening are really weird: the angle of Kirk and Spock at Spock’s station; the camera suddenly randomly dropping right before Kirk starts walking down the step.

DECKER?? Rev. Spice Boy’s father perhaps?

Hmm so the Constellation is another Constitution class like the Enterprise and the Intrepid. I always get a kick out of seeing other space ships of that same shape for some reason.

Mr. Spock in command.

Poor ship! In an aesthetically pleasing disarray, completely abandoned.

Kirk is a very good detective. “They didn’t leave any random mess, so they must have left on purpose.”

Spock in the chair!

Found Decker!

I know he has to be a Commodore to outrank Kirk later but... why is a Commodore in space? Or in other words, why isn’t the Constellation captained by a Captain?

Does Jim know everyone in Starfleet? He’s just that guy, isn’t he? He has a lot of acquaintances and he’s very friendly and easily charming so he just kind of collects people (especially Starfleet people since it is his WHOLE adult life) but he doesn’t have that many close friends or lasting romantic relationships; he’s hard to get really, properly close to.

Well that’s the mystery of the crew solved :( That’s like tragically sad.

I like when Kirk is smart and understands star ships.

Decker is not being very helpful here in actually explaining what the Threat is! Still, that’s a very classic horror trope: an evil so terrible that it is beyond description. (Alternately, he could have just said “giant windsock dipped in cement,” which is what it was.)

Robot weapon!! Giant ancient alien robot weapon just floating around space, following its orders mindlessly because it is just a machine, a tool set loose by people no longer around to control or restrain it... I love that. That’s so cool and scary and weird all at once.

A space legend!! The Doomsday machine... The most terrible of all weapons, never meant to be used... it destroyed its makers and continues to destroy still...

Really into the visual of towing a ship through space.

We must deactivate the robot!

Now Kirk will repair the ship.

The Commodore is recovering, I see... at least nominally.

“Logically our primary duty is to save Captain Kirk.”

Spock is getting outranked!! Awkward lol. Not a good idea to try to outmaneuver Spock in any way, rank or no. He is Savage and he WILL bring up your dead crew. He is Pissed. The subtlety.

McCoy is soo the audience in this scene. “So are you.. Sir.” That patented rocking motion. Trying to get over, under, around, or through the regulations to do what’s right.

Is the Commodore chewing on one of the floppy disks? That seems pretty weird to me. You can’t EAT them.

Mmm, Kirk working on the ship; sexy. Yet again he must fly the whole constitution class ship BY HIMSELF.

The thing is that Spice Boy Sr. IS unfit for command; anyone who saw him 10 minutes earlier on the Constellation would know that.

I love that not!Uhura doesn’t even try to tell the Commodore the status report; she talks to Spock because she knows who the real boss is here.

Spock, always on the lookout for how to use regulations to get himself back in the chair. Also foreshadowing the suicide.

Now Kirk will distract the evil robot to save Spock!!

Got that ship doing with only Scotty’s help, working all the controls, flying the whole damn thing himself like the bamf he is. Gotta zig zag around to tempt and confuse the robot.

“Scotty you’ve earned your pay for the week.” They get paid lol? In what?

Now the robot machine is eating.

Love Spock’s little, subtle eyebrow raise when he hears Kirk’s name.

This scene is gold lol. Kirk’s not going to let Decker speak for Spock. “Where’s Spock? Give me Mr. Spock. What happened to Spock?” Like good news is that it wasn’t Spock being reckless with the ship but bad news is where is he??

Another regulations show down. “You can file a formal complaint but for now.. out of the chair. Or I shall snap my fingers and have security escort you out.”

Vulcans bluff all the time lmao.

Ah ha, now to get him officially declared unfit.

And now for the required hand to hand combat scene. This ep really does have everything.

The shuttlecraft is escaping!

I love that when Sulu announces that the shuttlecraft doors are opening, Spock’s just like “Well...close them. Duh.”

RIP Decker... The inevitable end of that character.

Spock wants Kirk back on the Enterprise immediately.

I know Kirk is slightly annoyed when Spock corrects his math but like...you know he also finds it sexy.

“Jim, you’ll be killed.” / “Don’t worry bb I don’t intend to die.” Is that not the dialogue?

Now Scotty has to solve literally everything himself.

The tension!!

“Gentlemen, beam me aboard.” That tone, though. That’s such a Kirk tone, like he’s got to be the Cool Boss even and especially in moments of high stakes. That subtle humor Shatner brought to him.

I knew they’re going to save him and I also knew they’d do it at the laaaast possible moment but I was still really scared.

Spock is so in love. The way he looks at Kirk at his return and welcomes him aboard...  Such relief.

And then some classic end of episode dialogue: Spock thoughtfully points out the larger implications of their adventure--that they might have only destroyed one of many planet killers still out there--while Kirk, all relaxed and happy now that the current problem has been solved, and still riding the high of his recent adventure, just makes a funny, minimizing remark. “I found one quite sufficient.” Little flirty smile for no reason.

And so the space legend lives on...

I loved this episode. It really had everything: great sci fi concept; K/S content; Starfleet regulations; a fist fight; aliens; a connection to the current events of its time (with the comparison to the H bomb, asking people to think about the long range/unintended consequences of our extreme weaponry); Kirk being heroic and good at his job; a tense finale.

I feel like this episode seems on its face to show the Kirk and Spock dichotomy that STID and the other AOS movies were trying to depict but like... AOS didn't get it. Like yes Spock quotes all the regulations and ultimately listens to Decker's regulation citing, and Kirk's like "yeah whatever screw those regulations,” but Spock is obviously making strategic decisions and he's always on the lookout for how to use the regs to his advantage--it's not just obeying for the sake of obeying. And Kirk isn't just cavalierly not caring about the rules--he's in an emergency situation and he reads it for what it is, a test of will, where regulations are being weaponized. And he weaponizes them, too: he knows Spock is his direct subordinate and not only will obey him but NEEDS to, per those same regulations.

All 3 of them, including McCoy, know both the regulations and their own morality; they're not that different, but they have different levels of power and different abilities with regard to how they use regulations and how they can interact with other people of other ranks. They ALL want to do what’s right and they will ALL either use or discard regulations as they see fit, to the best of their ability.

AOS just flattened it, in STID in particular: Spock likes rules and doesn't care about anything else and Kirk hates rules and never listens to them.

Of course Kirk in TOS is a decade older and has a lot more experience. Episodes like this make me think about how that experience is one of the huge differences between TOS and AOS Kirk (STXI and STID in particular). You can't fake 15 years of Starfleet experience. you just can't. Could AOS Kirk get down on the ground and fix the Constellation himself and fly it by himself? Probably not.

I get why the AOS verse ran itself into that corner, and in fact it doesn’t matter in STXI, where the narrative is a contained, emergency situation, and Kirk’s command is a field promotion for a discrete and limited purpose, but I do think the movies struggled with that conundrum later. No one has the time to grow and mature in a normal way. How do you build them up over time when you skipped over that development period they logically should have had, both as professionals and as people?

I appreciate STID in theory for trying to address that issue, I just think it did it badly. Like its Kirk narrative was supposed to be about "earning the chair" but it didn't keep Kirk IC while doing that, nor did it address the real problem: he's not just A Rebel, but he is verrrry inexperienced. (I know you could make arguments about his AOS background changing his personality blah blah blah I’ve seen STID recently and in my opinion it just doesn’t feel right.)

Then STB tried to skip over the issue by just pushing the narrative forward to mid-5YM. Well they’re magically experienced now! And that was even worse. So, what can you do?

Anyway that was a big AOS tangent lol.

Next ep is Catspaw. A little late for Halloween but always great nonetheless!

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #2021: fandom thoughts #star trek tos

[pendulumprince]

IT’S EPISODE 42. LET US PRAY.

After the recap and that naughty, naughty opening!

We’re… back in Den City?

We’re at Rev—NO, I’M SORRY, RYOKEN’S place

He’s looking out the window at Stardust Road

“Father, I will fulfill your wishes.”

Omg. His eyes are beautiful.

Annnnnd we still don’t have a full shot of his fucking face.

BACK TO LINK VRAINS!

REV GOES IN FOR THE FIRECT ATTACKK

FROG AND PIGEON ARE SHITTING THEIR BREECHES

AI IS HYPERVENTALATING

ME TOO ME TOO

BUT NAH, PLAYMAKER’S GOT THAT QUICKSPELL

IT NEGATES THE ATTACK!

AND PLAYMAKER SUMMONS 3 0 DEF MONSTERS

BUT REV ISN’T DONE!

PLAYMAKER STILL TAKES 500 LP DAMAGE VIA EFFECT

HE’S DOWN TO 400 LP!

REV ENDS HIS TURN

PLAYMAKER DRAWS

LINK SUMMONS

BRINGS OUT A LINK 1 500 ATK MONSTER

AND HE SUMMONS ANOTHER

LINK SUMMONS AGAIN

AI IS SO PROUD??

PLAYMAKER HOLDS UP TWO FINGERS AND AI DOES THE SAME THING AHHHH THEY’RE ADORABLE

HE SUMMONS BABY FIREWALL AT 1100 ATK

WHAT AN ADORABLE CHERUB

IT GOES DOWN TO 600 VIA EFFECT? LOL K

AND! HE SENDS REV’S MONSTER BACK TO HIS HAND BIA EFFECT

BUT REV ISN’T FAZED

“You believe that’ll allow you to make a comeback. But too bad.”

PLAYMAKER. IS. SHOCKED.

I DON’T THINK WE’VE EVER SEEN HIM LOOK THIS GENUINELY SURPRISED

REV TRIBUTES HIS OTHER MONSTER TO KEEP SECURITY DRAGON ON THE FIELD

AI IS SO DISAPPOINTED

“You only have 400 LP… 400?!”

THAT’S RIGHT BBY

PLAYMAKER’S GONNA USE THAT STORM ACCESS

“You’re going to use your skill in there?! You’re really going there, Playmaker?”

I mean, he’s made it this far

Might as well go all the way

“Don’t you feel it? There’s a high-density Data Storm over there. If I go…”

“I’M SAYING IT’S CRAZY! If you go there, it’s not just me! You’ll be harmed too!”

Okay Playmaker’s literally losing chunks of his “data body” whenever a piece of debris hits him

Holy shit

“There’s no other way to defeat Revolver/

EVEN REV THINKS THIS IS A WILD MOVE

“You’re going to destroy yourself, Playmaker?”

HE’S DOING IT

HE STICKS HIS HAND INTO THE STORM

AND!

HE LOSES HIS FUCKING ARM

FALLS OFF HIS D-BOARD

“Am I done for…?”

“PLAYMAKER!”

UM.

AI GRABS PLAYMAKER’S HAND!

AI… IS ON THE D-BOARD.

AS IN, OUT OF PLAYMAKER’S DUEL DISK

AND HE’S… BIGGER?

HOLY SHIT AI

YOU’RE JUST FULL OF SURPRISES

FUCK

AND HE FIXES PLAYMAKER’S ARM!

LISTEN BITCH, YOU CAN’T SAY THIS PURPLE ABOMINATION ISN’T YOUR FRIEND

FUCK

“I saved my secret move until the end ;) Right arm regenerated! Get on the board, Playmaker!”

He pulls Playmaker back up

Goes back into the duel disk!

PLAYMAKER’S GETTING SHOOK LEFT AND RIGHT THIS EPISODE

“You’re able to do that…?”

“If my partner’s going overboard, so will I!”

*cries* this episode is doing my aiballshippers heart a world of good.

Ai goes on, “I’ll steer the D-Board!”

HE TRANSFORMS INTO HIS TENTACLE SELF

CHANGES IT TO HIGH SPEED MODE??

“I’ll shield you, but only for 30 seconds. So do it by then!”

Oh. Oh. Ai is such a good partner EVERYBODY GET OUT

“But if you do this, you’ll be…”

“Be quiet! This is how I atone!”

Bby you barely did anything wrong, relax

But okay, Playmaker can go into the Data Storm now without literally losing a limb

PLAYMAKER USES STORM ACCESS

AND AI?? HELPS HIM GRAB THE CARD???

HE’S GOT IT

“Bye, Playmaker…”

AI DISINTEGRATES? UM

HE DOESN’T RESPOND WHEN PLAYMAKER CALLS OUT TO HIM

OMG IS THIS GOING TO BE A THING

IS AI ALWAYS INCAPACITATED DURING THESE PLAYMAKER-REV DUELS

BUT PLAYMAKER REDIRECTS HIS FOCUS TO THE DUEL

“Here I go, Revolver!”

REV IS SHOOKETH

“You did Storm Access…?”

PLAYMAKER LINK SUMMONS

AND! HERE HE IS!

TRANSCODE TALKER, AT 2300 ATK

“That’s the new power you acquired?”

PLAYMAKER ACTIVATES TRANSCODE’S EFFECT

HE CAN SPECIAL SUMMON ANOTHER -CODE TALKER FROM THE GRAVE!

DECODE’S BACK, BITCHES

AND DECODE GOES UP TO 2800 ATK

HE ACTIVATES TRANSCODE’S EFFECT

WHICH UPS DECODE UP TO 3300 AND TRANSCODE TO 2800

GOOD, HE’S GOT ALL THESE BROLIC BITCHES ON THE FIELD NOW

PLAYMAKER ACTIVATES A FIELD SPELL!

AND! 500 MORE ATK POINTS FOR MY BABIES

TRANSCODE’S AT 3300 AND DECODE’S AT 3800

REV. DOES NOT LOOK HAPPY.

PLAYMAKER HAS DECODE TALKER ATTACK REV’S DRAGON

REV GOES DOWN TO 2500 LP

AND! HIS FIELD IS WIDE OPEN!

PLAYMAKER GOES IN FOR THE DIRECT ATTACK!

TRANSCODE ATTACKS!

AND!!!

… and Rev special summons a monster from his hand via effect

It’s a 0 ATKer, but

That damage he would take is halved

Rev is down to 850 LP!

“You stopped me.”

“Don’t underestimate me, Playmaker.”

WELL ALRIGHT THEN

PLAYMAKER ENDS HIS TURN!

REV TAKES HIS

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY

AI IS BACK

And our smol boy is tired

“Ah ha, I thought I was going to die.”

PLAYMAKER LOOKS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM?? Or at least as happy as he’s ever able to look lol

“Have you shrunk?”

“Because I repaired my program quickly. Don’t worry about it. Anyway, he’s tough. But against two -code talkers, it’s only a matter of time!”

“Ignis, you forgot that I have the same skill.”

OKAY. SURE. BUT DO YOU HAVE AN IGNIS WILLING TO DIE FOR YOU?

BECAUSE PLAYMAKER ALMOST GOT RIPPED TO SHREDS BACK THERE

Rev has an internal thought

“With my father’s data material program… I should be able to control that Data Storm, no matter how strong the winds are.”

Oh, right. He’s got his pops.

“Revolver!” Omg Playmaker almost sounds worried.

HE TRIES TO REACH INTO THE STORM, BUT

HE’S SHOCKED BACK?

“The Data Storm’s density is too high. But if Playmaker can do it, so can I!”

OMG, REV DOESN’T KNOW AI WAS HELPING HIM

REV, NO

YOU’RE GONNA DIE

HE STICKS HIS HAND IN

FUCKIN LOSES HIS ARM, JUST LIKE PLAYMAKER DID

FALLS OFF HIS BOARD INTO THE DEBRIS RIDDLED ABYSS

Playmaker calls out to Rev again

“He can’t do it! Because he doesn’t have me!”

Ah, Ai’s back to his old antics lmao

But

BUT

REV GOT BACK ON HIS BOARD??

“I can’t afford to lose!”

HE… HEADS BACK INTO THE DATA STORM??

BUT

I

… the entire data storm freezes

Rev’s confused as shit

“What? What’s going on?”

Playmaker and Ai are also bamboozled

The storm is totally frozen from the outside, too

Frog and Pigeon keep filming

Back in Den City, Shoichi assumes it has to be a bug

Back in the Data Storm…

“Revolver…”

“That voice!”

No shit, it’s Kogami.

And of course he presents himself shrouded in golden light

And

OMG

PLAYMAKER ALSO SEES HIM

“That’s…!”

FUCKIN SHOICHI SEES HIM TOO

“Dr. Kogami? He’s alive?!”

Rev asks Kogami why he’s there

“Ryoken… I never did a single fatherly thing for you.”

Well, at least he admits he’s a shithead.

Kogami continues. “I only made you suffer. But you didn’t complain even once. You were a great son. Believe me, I never wanted to involve you in this. But without you, the world couldn’t be saved from destruction.”

“I know.”

Playmaker’s still watching

“What are they talking about?”

Ai wants to know what’s going on

Omg can they… not hear this convo?

Kogami continues. “You can’t lose here. I’ll give you my final strength.”

“Final strength? But if you do that…”

“I don’t care. Protect humanity’s future in my place. You’re my final and only hope.”

Kogami disintegrates, prepares Rev’s arm

AND IN FRONT OF REV

“This radiance…!”

IT’S STARDUST ROAD

FLASHBACK TO BABY!RYOKEN AND KOGAMI LOOKING AT STARDUST ROAD TOGETHER

“Father…”

BACK IN THE PRESENT, THE DATA STORM STARTS AGAIN

REV FOLLOWS STARDUST ROAD

HE’S LIVIN THAT STORM ACCESS LIFE

GRABS A CARD

TAKES A QUICK SEC TO CHECK HIS FATHER’S HEALTH STATS

SHIT DOESN’T LOOK GOOD

“The Stardust Road lead me to it.”

“Stardust Road…?”

Ah, that’s it. That’s the clue Rev drops.

REV ACTIVATES A SPELL CARD

HE SPECIAL SUMMONS A LINK MONSTER FROM THE GRAVE

BRINGS BACK FLAHS CHARGE AT 2300 ATK

REV MAKES PLAYMAKER DRAW A CARD

HE LINK SUMMONS!

IT’S LINK 4 TOPOLOGIC GAMBLE DRAGON AT 3000 ATK

REV’S STILL WATCHING HIS FATHER’S STATS

THE OLD BITCH IS GOING DOWN, AND FAST

VIA EFFECT, BOTH REV AND PLAYMAKER ADD CARDS FROM THEIR GRAVES TO THEIR HANDS

AND

KOGAMI’S HEART RATE JUST FELL TO 0

THE BITCH IS DEAD! THE BITCH IS DEAD! HI HO, THE RATCHET BITCH IS DEAD!! :DDD

… naturally, Rev doesn’t share my happiness on the matter.

“Sorry, but I can’t continue this duel!”

Um, what

REV SPECIAL SUMMONS A 2200 DEF MONSTER

ACTIVATES GAMBLE’S EFFECT

BOTH HIS AND PLAYMAKER’S HANDS ARE DESTROYED

AND BY HIS OTHER MONSTER’S EFFECT

FOR EVERY CARD DESTROYED, THEY EACH TAKE 300 LP IN DAMAGE

THREE TOTAL CARDS MEANS THEY EACH TAKE 900 IN DAMAGE

BOTH PLAYMAKER AND REV DROP DOWN TO 0!

IT’S A TIE!

BACK IN DEN CITY, SHOICHI IS #NOTOKAY

“The Tower of Hanoi will absorb Yusaku!”

PLAYMAKER FALLS INTO THE ABYSS

SO DOES REV

HIS LAST THOUGHTS ARE OF HIS POPS??

OMG HOW AM I GONNA COLLECT ALL THESE FEELINGS

Preview time!

Yusakus back in Den City!

And our boy is a wreck

“The mansion on the cliff from where you can see glowing plankton in the ocean. That’s where his enemy is! The link between The Lost Incident and the ignis are revealed. Now that Yusaku knows the truth, what will he do?”

Okay so we got a shot of baby!Yusaku in that torture room

And another shot of Kogami with Kyoto, irl!Faust, and irl!Genome standing behind him

That’s a… mighty wicked smile you got there Kogami…

And! Oh no!

IT’S BABY!RYOKEN SITTING ON THE FLOOR CLUTCHING HIS HEAD

MY TINY BOY IS CRYING

FUCK

BACK IN THE REAL WORLD

YUSAKU AND SHOICHI ARE IN! RYOKEN’S! HOUSE!

STANDING RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF HIM

FUUUUUUCK

#yugioh vrains #vrains episode reactions #vrains episode 42 #playmaker #ai #ryoken kogami #revolver #kiyoshi kogami #knights of hanoi #tower of hanoi #link vrains #my posts