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thechasefiles · 5 years

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The Chase Files Daily Newscap 11/10/2019

Good Morning #realdreamchasers. Here is your daily news cap for Friday, October 11th, 2019. There is a lot to read and digest so take your time. Remember you can read full articles via Barbados Government Information Service (BGIS), Barbados Today (BT), or by purchasing a Weekend Nation Newspaper (WN).

DEMS SAY GOVT FAILING THE PEOPLE – The Democratic Labour Party (DLP) has slammed the Mia Amor Mottley Administration for painting an image on the international stage that all was well at home, while ordinary Barbadians suffer. DLP president Verla De Peiza, speaking yesterday at a press conference at Charlton Chambers, Whitepark Road, St Michael, gave the Government a failing grade, adding it was not meeting the social needs of Barbadians. “The people of Barbados have to be at the core of whatever policies are being made,” she said. “You cannot have policies that take the country somewhere internationally but leave your people behind. It is a recipe for anarchy and dissension. “When you have conversations overseas about climate change and how it will impact people and environmental policy, but at home you are pumping sewage into the sea, garbage is piling up everywhere, with rodents and flies on the increase, and diseases in the offing, how can you give anything other than a failing grade?” she asked. (WN)

CALL TO BE ON GUARD – The Ministry of Health is warning Barbadians to be on their guard as the island experiences a “significant” upsurge in cases of viral illnesses. The caution came yesterday from both acting Chief Medical Officer Dr Anton Best and senior medical officer of health (North) Dr Leslie Rollock. Best reported that after investigations, specifically in the area of disease surveillance, the ministry had determined there was an increase in rhino (cold) viruses, as well as some flu viruses. The response came in the wake of yesterday’s Front Page story in the DAILY NATION which highlighted the concerns of parents about a large number of children falling ill at Harrison College with flu-like symptoms. Since then, other schools have reported students and some teachers being sick with similar symptoms, including sore throat, vomiting and headache along with feelings of lethargy. (WN)

COMPTROLLER: UP TO WAREHOUSES – The onus is now on warehouse operators to upload their stock into the new Automated System for Customs Data (ASYCUDA) World system. And if they don’t, there will be no activity, causing their own bottleneck. That was revealed by Comptroller of Customs Owen Holder, who was speaking following a marathon meeting on Tuesday with stakeholders in the customs industry. “The warehouse owners were asked to submit their stock to Customs on August 23, and add the opening stock in the system. To date, some organisations are still trying to ascertain what their stock is. “The issuance of a licence to operate a warehouse is conditioned by many things, including the operation of a system that they can easily determine the stock levels within the warehouse at any time,” he explained. (BT)

$7,500 COMPENSATION – A local High Court has ordered a 38-year-old woman to pay $7,500 in compensation for injuries she inflicted on another woman with a hammer. The order was handed down yesterday by Justice Randall Worrell in the No. 2 Supreme Court against Tracy Alicia Layne of Skeete’s Road, Clapham, Christ Church. Justice Worrell told Layne she must pay $2,500 forthwith, which was paid. She must pay another $2,500 by November 29 this year and the final installment of a similar sum by January 31 next year. He also informed her he will deliver the court’s sentencing on the same day as the final payment. Layne went on trial last year on two charges: that on March 29, 2005 she wounded Esther Moore with intent to maim, disfigure or disable her or to do her some serious bodily harm and unlawfully and maliciously wounding her. On October 16, 2018, the accused was found not guilty of wounding with intent, but guilty of the lesser charge. Layne is being represented by attorney-at-law Arthur Holder. (BT)

TRIDENTS BOOK SPOT IN CPL FINAL – Ashley Nurse and Raymon Reifer starred with both bat and ball as Barbados Tridents knocked out defending champions Trinbago Knight Riders to set up a 2019 Hero Caribbean Premier League(CPL) final against the all-conquering Guyana Amazon Warriors. Nurse’s intervention was crucial in both innings, first when blasting an unbeaten 24 from nine balls to propel a stuttering Tridents innings up to 160 for 6 and then taking two key wickets to help strangle the Knight Riders’ run-chase. Having been put into bat, the Tridents looked set to make an under-par total for the majority of their innings until Nurse and Raymon Reifer – who later also played his part with the ball, bowling a nerveless final over that included the vital wicket of Seekkuge Prasanna for a 27-ball 51 and the match-clinching one of Khary Pierre – plundered an unbroken 48 runs for the seventh wicket from the final 14 balls. With the Knight Riders ultimately coming up 12 runs short, the final two overs when the Tridents batted were the difference between going to Saturday’s final and going home. Johnson Charles could have been dismissed twice early in his 35, dropped by Denesh Ramdin in the first over of the night and then seeing a skied shot land safe after Lendl Simmons and Chris Jordan left it for each other. While never quite at his fluent best, Charles’ effort was crucial in holding things together during a fraught first half of the Tridents innings in which Hales and Shakib fell to Pierre and JP Duminy was forced to hobble off retired hurt after injuring his leg while hitting a six. The Tridents will be desperate to have him available on Saturday. Charles followed Duminy straight off the field, skying Ali Khan to Jordan at mid-off to leave the Tridents in bother at 74 for 3 – effectively four down – in the 12th over. Things got worse for them two overs later when Jonathan Carter was spectacularly caught and bowled by Jordan, who flung himself to his left in his follow-through to pluck the ball from the air inches above the grass. When Jason Holder picked out Colin Munro at deep midwicket in the same over, the Tridents were 92 for 5 with time running out and the innings in real danger of falling away completely. That didn’t happen. Shai Hope played nicely for his 23 from 18 with two fours and a six, before Reifer and Nurse gave the innings its all-important explosive finish. Both men finished 24 not out, with five Hero Maximums between them. Even then, 160 for 6 was no more than a par score in tricky conditions for bowlers coping with a wet ball. Seekkuge Prasanna of Trinbago Knight Riders almost brought it home for his team with 51 off 27 balls. (WN)

HELPING ONE OF THEIR OWN – A group of former St James Secondary School (now Frederick Smith Secondary) students have joined hands to raise funds to assist cancer victim Ruth Quintyne with medical expenses. This morning, during a brief ceremony at the Ministry of Labour, Quintyne received a $10, 000 cheque from the Trents 95 Alumni. Trents 95 Alumni which was born out of an immediate need to help Quintyne, has as its mission to socially connect with Trents Class of ‘95 old scholars and to provide relief to those in need, by reason of ill-health, disability, financial hardship or other disadvantages. The funds were raised through a fish fry held at the Bay Street Esplanade on September 7, and also from donations from corporate Barbados and other kind-hearted citizens. Almost a year ago, Quintyne was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma, a cancer of the blood. She is currently undergoing chemotherapy treatment and is unable to work. Quintyne has no health insurance coverage and her focus right now is on winning with cancer and having a much-needed hip replacement surgery. “It has been a challenging year mentally, and it’s only through God’s grace and mercy that I am here today and I am overwhelmed. I want to thank the Trents alumni, my schoolmates. “It warms my heart to see that they really stepped out for me. I have seen the hard work that you guys put in, and I have seen the challenges that you had and I am sincerely grateful from the bottom of my heart to each and everyone of you,” said Quintyne. (BT)

MEKKING SPORT – The string of Caribbean comedians and one comedienne kept a packed audience at the Lloyd Erskine Sandiford Centre in fits of laughter at the third annual Let Muh Laugh comedy show last Saturday night. In a show that could be deemed moderately comical, Barbadians Rickardo Reid Jr, Nadia Phillips, Rum and Koke alongside Jamaican Chris Johnny Daley and Trinidadian Allan D Entertainer shared stories that were not only hilarious but absurd to the point that you could not help but laugh. The Market Vendor made a special guest appearance. While taking jabs at politicians and celebrities, the line-up also shared comical family and village stories along with other life experiences. As expected, issues affecting the Caribbean both economically and socially including horning, homosexuality and violence were up for discussion. The first half of the show saw Reid and Phillips take the stage with Reid speaking of mishaps at funerals, the exploits of his family – especially his uncle – who got him involved in entertainment. The NIFCA bronze, silver and gold medal winner and Daphne Joseph and Alfred Pragnell Awardee got a good response. Meanwhile, Phillips, the lone female didn’t connect with the audience and she got very little response. She spoke of how the tough economic times were impacting on daily life before descending into the realm of bowel movements and nose picking. The topics did not resonate with some audience members who started clapping during her performance. However, Emcee Mac Fingall who from the start of the show kept the laughs coming also held the show together between performances telling his stories in his usual hilarious manner and engaging in banter with the audience. Of note was an interview of the Market Vendor, done by Rebecca Fernandes of Corridor News Network. The wide-ranging interview revealed what he would do if he were Prime Minister including changing the names of several government agencies and his views on the most dangerous weapon in Barbados, which incidentally was a cutlass. The Market Vendor who had his bucket said it contained notes of things he would not like to forget and a wealth of other information. Representing Trinidad, Allan D Entertainer who would amend some of the Ten Commandments if he could, said they would come with serious consequences if not adhered to. He said if he could change the commandments, individuals who lie would fart, for those who steal their arms would get shorter and those who commit adultery would walk with bow legs; he envisioned how some politicians would look if it were so. He was joined by Chris Johnny Daley who told stories of his homeland Jamaica and the dancehall scene there. Entertainer Ding Dong’s one word songs bore the brunt of his assault while the many tales of his interactions with his wife were well received. Local talent Rum and Koke gave commentary of a game of the Caribbean Political League (CPL), a version of the cricket league. They noted how the former captain was extremely quiet during his stint but how the new captain was leading from the front, at times bowling and batting at the same time. The receptive and almost full to capacity audience cheered and laughed loudly with almost everyone remaining seated until the curtain closed on the show around midnight. (BT)

BEAUTY, TALENT AND SMARTS – Give her the mace, the crown and throne. Kyla Ward deserved to be crowned on the night of the Barbados Talented Teen category amongst females. She pulled out all the stops as she performed amazingly with guitar in hand and splendid voice to match. With a mash up remix to Lana Del Rey’s Young and Beautiful fused with End of the World by Rob Dickinson, Queen Kyla was stunning as she sat poised on the stage at the Lloyd Erskine Sandiford Centre, Two Mile Hill, St Michael on Saturday. She was simply amazing. Her gown was another show stopper as she came out bedecked in a golden mesh and sequined piece which showed her curves and pieces of chocolate skin. The question: “Who do you find as a phenomenal woman?” did not trip her up either as she carved that one out by naming young environmentalist, Greta Thunberg, who made headlines as an activist for the earth and green living. Ward said that she was not expecting to win, but she was relieved nonetheless. First runner-up, Naticia Eugene, pointed out the humility of Michelle Obama when asked about a woman who made a significant impact on her and she too was graceful in her pink gown. Eugene, also a vocalist, rocked the hall as she sang Titanium. She won Miss Congeniality, Best Project and Best Project Interview. Lauryn Small, who played steel pan, commanded the stage and that earned her enough points as second runner-up. She came out gowned in a sweet sliver set which flowed from waist to floor. Small hailed her mother for making a significant impact in her life. Other participants included Hope Thomas, Azaria Sealy and Grace Pooler who did an interesting act of archery mixed with gymnastics. Manager of Barbados Talented Teens Kofi Branch said that the programme is in its sixth year. (BT)

HEAVY ROLLERS FOR SOCA FOR SIGHT – The sounds of sweet soca filled the atmosphere at The Barbados Yacht Club Saturday night when patrons gathered for the Soca For Sight charitable event. Some top local entertainers performed at the worthy cause which is one of two activities intended to raise $500, 000 for the Lion’s Eye Care Centre at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital. There was food and drink on sale throughout the night as well as a silent auction which all formed part of the fund-raising initiative. As for the show, it was a top-notch production from start to finish. MC Ronnie Clarke did an excellent job complementing what the artistes delivered on stage. The backing band, De Red Boyz, were in fine musical form for the entire night. The brass section was superb. Two sweet singing vocalists in Betty B and Biggie Irie added to the band. They started the night out with some hip hop classics such as Dancing Queen, Oh What A Night and Happy, among others. A fitting member to the performing cast was newly crowned Blind Soca King Mr DJwho sang It Got Me. When the six-time champ was done performing, he was spotted in the crowd enjoying the night’s entertainment. The Soca General, Edwin Yearwood, was the first main act to grace the stage to the sounds of the 1997 hit song All Aboard, a song he had penned for Trinidadian band Atlantik. His was a full groovy set which appeared to please the party crowd and included such hits as Good Time, Carnival On My Mind, Feels Like Home Again, Pump Me Up and Wet Me. Edwin ended with Sak Pase and as has become the norm, the massive were rocking from side to side as they loudly proclaimed: “De Road is Mine…” Biggie Irie returned to the stage, this time for a solo set which included: Country Girl, Pankatang, Need Ah Riddim, Magic and Nah Going Home. He went way back in time to sing an old time favourite Splash Band’s Get Busy. King of the Road Mighty Grynner upped the pace a bit, and the crowd loved it. With a set filled with classics, the “old dawg” sang Mr T, We Want More Grynner, Turn Up De Speaker and Leggo I Hand and had the crowd rocking. Repeatedly saying he could sing all night long, Grynner got an encore as the crowd chanted: “more Grynner” to which he obliged. He came back on stage and sang Leggo I Hand one more time. RPB got the honour of closing the show. His performance saw the crowd enjoying songs such as Once Upon A Wine, Wrong Gal, Ragga Ragga and Something’s Happening. He ended with the 2017 hit song Boat Ride at which time 75-year-old Bill Tempro, who is legally blind, made his way to the stage. RPB said the song was in tribute to Bill who will set out to sail around the island on October 13, the second fund-raising event called Sail for Sight. The entertainer asked everyone to give Bill their support as he embarked on the activity which is for a worthy cause. (BT)

RIHANNA IN NEW LIGHT – She has already sold millions of albums, tons of lingerie, and is making a name for herself in high-fashion. And Rihanna’s next venture is in the publishing world. The 31-year-old mogul announced on Monday morning that she will be releasing her first ever “visual autobiography” – simply titled Rihanna – through publisher Phaidon. Perhaps the most interesting part of the release is that there will be three-limited editions including the most luxe option which features a 2, 000-pound hand-carved marble pedestal from Portugal which has already sold out. There are only ten in the world and last month Cardi B bid on and won the Ultra Luxury Supreme Edition – titled Stoner – for $111, 000. There is also the Luxury Supreme version which includes a gold custom bookstand created in collaboration with artists the Haas Brothers which retails at a mere $5, 500. There is also a limited edition Fenty x Phaidon version for $175 featuring a steel bookstand also designed by the Haas Brothers and a standard version for $150. No matter what format the book is in, it will contain more than 1, 000 photos documenting the pop star and her life including many snaps which have never been seen. Additional features include three paper stocks, seven single and double page gatefolds, nine bound-in booklets, one tip-in sheet, and a double-sided removable poster. Of the project, Rihanna said: “I am so excited to share this collection of incredible images. I’m very grateful to the talented photographers and artists who contributed. We’ve been working on the book for over five years and I’m really happy to be able to finally share it with everybody.” A press statement read: “From her childhood in Barbados to her worldwide tours, from quintessential fashion moments to private time with friends and family, the book showcases intimate photographs of her life as a musician, performer, designer, and entrepreneur.” Rihanna and Phaidon are hosting a pre-publication ticketed book party at the Guggenheim Museum in New York City this Friday. (BT)

There are 82 days left in the year Shalom! Follow us on Twitter, Facebook & Instagram for your daily news. #thechasefiles #dailynewscaps #bajannewscaps #newsinanutshell

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realexperiences-blog · 6 years

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Be Aware... This is not for everyone. Please don’t hate.

I didn't have a period the whole month of December. I became paranoid and decided to take a test... Negative. Okay, thank god. I saved the other test for in case I didn't get a period in another week or so. On January 5th 2018, I could hardly sleep because my stomach was causing so much pain. I decided to take my other test that following morning after work. On January 6th, I tested positive. The pregant line on the test popped up so fast and all I could think was NO WAY. I stood in shock waiting for my boyfriend of six months, Paul, to come into the bathroom. The first thing he said was, "What? Why is your face like that?" and then he brushed past me to see the test. I walked into the bedroom and turned off all of the lights. I laid down and began to cry. I felt embarrassed. I felt stupid. I felt conflicted. How on Earth did this happen to me? Paul laid beside me and held me while I cried. He assured me that everything would be fine, that he supports whatever decision I make, and that he will be here every step of the way. Wow. That is when I became even more sure than before that Paul was who I'm meant to take on life with.

There are plenty of times where I feel awful about myself but nothing compares to me realizing I need to get rid of the baby growing inside of me. Throughout the next few days I imagine what it would be like to raise a child with Paul. I wonder what gender it would be. I find myself honored that Paul would want a child with me. He researched everything. He even called and made the appointment for me because I was too afraid. I needed someone to talk to but I didn't want to tell any of my friends or family... I was too afraid of what they'd think or say. Paul offered to tell his mother if I wanted because, as it turns out, she has been through the same thing! That was relieving. Luckily he comes from a kickass family who is supportive and close. I'm the luckiest to have him. Anyway, the appointment was set for January 9th at 1:40pm. Paul took me. When we got to the clinic, there were only a few other women in there. They were all much older than me so I felt out of place and ashamed once more. Paul had to leave me to go pay something that was due. I was sad, but I understood. Once he left, I felt super uncomfortable. Thankfully, I got called back within 10 minutes of him leaving.

I forgot to mention that I had stayed up alllll night the night before my appointment watching videos of other girls' experiences with abortion and just thing to myself... wow, I can't believe this happened to you. Paul had fallen asleep a few hours before I started watching the videos. I scared myself watching them. I couldn't help but want to kiss Paul. I hugged and kissed him and he didn't wake up... my heavy sleeper. He turned over in my direction and I gave him another kiss that woke him up. I felt bad but I did secretly want him to be awake. I told him what was on my mind and began to cry (Stupid hormones.. I don't know if they kick in this early but I'm blaming them). He held me again and helped me feel better. We eventually fell back asleep until it was time for the appointment.

Once I got called back in the clinic, a woman took me to a room. All she really did was confirm my personal information, ask me if I was certain I wanted to go through with the termination, and then briefly gave me a run down of my options. From there I went to get my height, weight, and blood type. All of the nurses there were really nice and considerate. They kept telling me that they would send Paul in to me as soon as he returned. From the room I went for my ultrasound on my belly. I was nervous because I didn't know how I would feel if I saw a tiny embryo on the screen. She asked me if I wanted to know if it was twins and I said yes. I don't know why I would do that to myself. She told me that she was pretty certain my uterus was empty. We had to do a scan that included an internal scan (aka going up my vagina). She still didn't see much but a tiny tiny tiny sac. She said it could be blood, a fetus, or an eptopic situation. I took another pregnacy test to ensure I was in fact pregnant. It showed positive. She decided we had to wait another week so that hopefully she'll be able to see it better. I'll write about that when the day comes.

Friday January 12th - Saturday January 13th I had a really amazing dinner at a steakhouse on Friday night... only to wake up at 0400 to throw it all back up. :( I was up and down for the rest of the day. I threw up on 4 seperate occasions! It was gross. By the end of the day I was feeling a little bit better. The following morning I felt awful again, but I forced myself to get up and get moving because Paul's parents were visiting and I wasn't going to be the one to stop them from enjoying themselves. I felt rather queasy throughout the day, but I pushed through. I ate a bunch of yummy fried pickles. :) The next morning my stomach hurt pretty bad but that was not unusual. Luckily I haven't puked since that first day. The appointment to see if the embryo inside has grown or not is tommorrow. We'll see how that goes.

I forgot the most important part! For the past few days that I've been feeling like garbage, Paul has litterally been by my side. Whatever I needed, he got for me. He would even come lay with me or just check on me periodically. He rocks.

Tuesday January 16th I went for my final appointment today. Paul was there the whole time this time. They called us into a small room and gave information about the pills (if the baby was big enough to see by now). She brought me back to the scan room, Paul came too. She skipped the external ultrasound alltogether and went straight to the internal! It wasn't the same team of women working today from the last time I was here so it was a little awkward at first but everyone was nice. During the scan she didn't really say much like the last woman did. Once she was done, she told me I was 5 weeks pregnant! The good (or sad...) new was that I could continue with the treatment. She took us back into the room and talked more about the treatment and explained that she would have to upload my information to a system to have a doctor approve it and it would take 45-60 minutes. I paid for the treatment (like $500!?!?!?) and then we went to KFC! :) At KFC I looked up pictures of a 5 week embryo... the size of a sesame seed! That's crazy. It sort of looked like a little dragon or something like that. We went back to the doctors and waited to be called back. We were taken to a room where the woman gave me a pregnancy test to take on January 30th to ensure the treatment worked, codeine (which I can't take), and some more information on the medication. I then took one tablet by mouth. I read online that this medication would end the pregnancy. Then there were 4 small hexagon shaped pills to go up my cooch. These are to remove the sac. So crazy that 4 tiny pills could remove this from my body. She asked if I wanted to do it myself or have her do it (put the pills in me), and I asked her to. Yes, I was uncomfortable at first but I knew I wouldn't be able to put them in myself. I went around to the other side of the curtain and 1, 2, 3 all done! Super fast and painless. I felt a little uneasy afterwards because I realized that was it. We were sent home after that. Once we got to the car, I felt sad because of the situation... and also scared of the upcoming side affects.

It's been a few hours now and I haven't bled yet which makes me a little nervous. I am however, mildly cramping. Paul is such a sweetheart. He went out and got me pads, a heating pad, and medicine. Plus other small things like coke. :) I'm sitting next to him on the couch. I told him I wanted him to play video games. I knew it'd make him happy and hopefully it'll ease his mind to stop trying to take care of me so much. I feel bad. Anyway, hopefully the bleeding will start soon and it'll be quick and not too painful physically. I don't know what I'll do if I see the sac :/. I'll update as time goes on.

Monday January 22nd Throughout the whole process, it wasn't all that bad. the first few days I only had mild cramping and period like blood. Over the weekend the cramps got worse and I practically bled through my pants every day.

Sidenote: I actually did bleed through my pants and Paul's couch the first day... so embarrassing... I felt terrible.

I lost so much blood one day, I thought I was going to pass out! All of the other symptoms I didn't get. Anyway, I went out with Paul and his parents to walk around Cambridge. I didn't bleed much the night before/the following morning. While out, we went to lunch. As soon as we stood up to leave, I swear I bled right through my pants. Once we got home, I went straight to the bathroom to change my pad. When I sat down I felt what I thought was a lot of blood come ou... I looked into the toilet and saw the sac. I didn't really know how to act. I immediately called for Paul. I'm sure he didn't care to seee how gross it was but I needed someone to share this with. The first thing he said was, "What? Is that a turd?" LOL! Then he realized what it was. It was a lot bigger than we were both expecting. If I had to compare it to anything, I would have to say it was about the size of my middle finger. I was kind of in shock at first because I really wasn't expecting that. I feel like I'm rather emotionless at this point. I don't really feel anything. Is that wrong? I feel like I've been emotionless for years now but I thought that this would wreck me. Maybe I'm a terrible person? Maybe I'm just comfortable with my decision. I'm not really sure... but it's over now. I never ever would have thought I'd be in that position. I would have loved to keep it honestly, but things wouldn't have worked. For the past few hours I've been having this reoccuring thought, or terrible daydream even, of Paul and I actually being excited for a little one someday and me miscarrying it... that's a new fear of mine and if the day comes... I'd probably deserve it honestly. Hopefully it won't though... I never imagined myself ever being in this type of situation nor did I ever think that I would get rid of a baby but the time was just very very very wrong. I feel awful... but I'm super thankful to have Paul by my side. Hopefully I won't be stupid and let myself push him away. I've got a great life ahead of me if I don't let him slip away. We'll see, but for now...

The end.

#abortion #sad #love #heartbreak

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lusciousbeast-blog · 6 years

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219.

Initially, writing about getting married seemed like a GREAT idea. Now, judging by the fact that I’ve barely managed to write once every six weeks or so, the whole thing seems rather pointless. Even now, my brain is really struggling to put a sentence together, due mostly in part to the fact that it’s completely clogged, courtesy of my overconsumption of cheese and eggnog over the past few weeks (if you haven’t tried the Harmony Organic Eggnog, do yourself a favour and get some next Christmas– it’s fucking incredible).

Time feels like it’s racing. Normally, when I have something really big to look forward to, everything seems to grind to a halt. Not so when you’re planning a wedding. We are now officially less than 8 months away from getting hitched. Now, I know 8 months to most people probably seems like a long time, but when I think it’s been more than that since we got back from Zimbabwe, it’s mental to me. While I’m obviously ridiculously excited to be marrying Craig, the anxiety that has come along with all of it, is overwhelming. So much so, that when I started seeing a naturopath recently, she told me that to her, my body seems like it’s in a constant state of Fight or Flight.

(In all likelihood, this is something that has been building for a while, long before Craig asked me to be his forever person).

Most of my adult life has been spent planning the next big event to look forward to, while juggling multiple jobs and constantly changing my mind about what I want to be when I grow up. Not one to settle into one thing too easily, (I get SUPER bored if I’m under stimulated), I think it’s all catching up to me now.

When reading all the magazines and other stuff that is the creation of the gazillion dollar wedding industry, I have yet to see an honest account of the “not so pretty” bits of planning what is often billed as the BIGGEST EVENT OF YOUR LIFE. So that’s going to be my mission today – sharing with y’all some of the things that to date, have almost broken me. In no particular order, here we go.

BUILDING A WEDDING WEBSITE

Back in the summer, Craig and I were at an audition for a show that was looking for a real-life couple to co-host. While in the waiting room, we ran in to some friends of his, and he told them about our engagement. After congratulations were given, the husband offered some advice – enjoy every second of it, and know that you will likely get into one big ‘ish fight during the planning process.

SUPER!

When it came to invites, we decided to scrap the whole paper invite thing. For one, because it seems like such an absurd waste of paper, and two, that money could be better spent on say, the open bar, or our photographer, or our kick ass wedding band, or pretty much ANYTHING.

I’d also perused a bunch of websites and thought it would be a creatively fulfilling process. WRONGO!

After doing the initial research as to what were the most user friendly and aesthetically pleasing sites to use, I started my trial with WeddingWindow. After running into bumps early on (difficulty with picture layout and such), I moved on to (and quickly ditched) WedSite, SquareSpace, Wix and Luvbirds, before finally deciding to bite the bullet and use Riley and Grey, because they were having a Black Friday 50% off sale. All the sites I tried before them were missing key elements, or were annoying when it came to picture layout and such. Riley and Grey looked very promising, and was going very smoothly, until I tried to upload the picture for the Welcome page, and was met with the spinning wheel of death on my computer screen. This went on for several attempts, at which point I sent a very choicely worded, totally passive aggressive email to customer support, outlining my issue, and explaining, “politely” that what was supposed to be a fun part of an even more fun event, was filling me with rage and almost resulted in my basically brand new computer meeting a premature death.

The gentleman from their support team who got back to me fairly quickly, was incredibly apologetic and spewed out a bunch of tech speak the jist of which, was telling me that they’d just switched their photo editing platform, because Adobe (who powered it previously) basically sucked. I responded with a huge thank you, that I hadn’t quite pulled all my hair out yet, and that he’d saved my iMac from being chucked off my balcony.

I’m pleased to report that the website is now finished, filled with loads of fun pictures and information, and that I checked that fucker off my list.

THE DRESS

Hm. The Dress. Turns out that buying off the rack is probably the simpler way to go. I’ll keep it simple here by saying that after my first fitting with the dress maker (thankfully only with a cotton muslin version of it), something wasn’t sitting right. I looked frumpy, and the more I thought about it the more I panicked about moving forward with the current design. After much back and forth with my dressmaker (who is LOVELY) and a huge amount of very constructive input from my step-mother, I’m starting from scratch with a new, similar, but more modern and clean version of the initial inspiration I went in with. I was supposed to have the first consultation for this new look last week, but the good old TTC (Toronto’s transit system) ensured that I missed that appointment, even though I gave myself almost two hours to get there. World Class City, incredibly sub-par public transport.

I will report on the progress in the early part of the new year.

THE TIMELINE

Between all the different weddings I’ve attended and the ones I’ve worked, you’d think I’d have the timeline down. It’s proven to be one of the most anxiety inducing parts. Largely, I think, due to the fact that when I think about things like walking down the aisle with 150 people watching, and giving a wedding speech, I want to throw up a little. My cousin - who is an actor - shared this sentiment when she told me that in spite of her comfort with performing, the thing that she was most unprepared for on her wedding day, was how uncomfortable she felt in the above- mentioned situations. So, I guess it’s normal? Regardless, wanting to make sure people aren’t bored at ANY point, is a big deal. From what I’ve witnessed, most wedding timelines aren’t fully adhered too anyway. This doesn’t change that fact that I think it’s hilarious and sad all at the same time, that someone (me) who organizes the hell out of her life, crumbles at the thought of putting together a timeline, for ONE DAY.

THE GUEST LIST

Craig can confirm, that barely 48 hours after he proposed, while we were on the flight from Harare to Victoria Falls, I’d already done a rough guest list. Initially I think we both thought we’d be able to contain it to 120 or so people. At last count, I think we’d invited 182 (including kids, who may get left behind). Our guest list seems to have exploded, and we don’t even have big families to blame! What we feel very confident about however, is that we have the makings for one of the best parties, ever. We both agreed that looking back we’d be more regretful of certain people not being there, than the money we saved trying to contain things. After all, your wedding day is quite possibly the only other time apart from your funeral, where you can bring all the people you love most in the world, together at the same time, and THAT my friends, is pretty awesome.

QUESTIONING EVERY LITTLE GOD DAMN BIT OF YOUR LIFE

Perhaps it has more to do with the fact that our wedding date is uncomfortably close to when I will turn 40, but the past few months have been filled with self-doubt, fear of the future, questions about my choice (or lack thereof) in career path, guilt over the way I handle certain situations, etc. etc. etc. If it can be doubted, it seems I will doubt it! Thankfully, the one thing I have not doubted, even for one second, is my choice in partner. I am reminded of this on a daily basis. I have managed to find someone who indulges my every impulse (from buying Wally’s World Mugs to drink eggnog out of while watching Christmas Vacation, to immediately agreeing to spontaneous road trips to visit friends, to jumping into the gorge of Victoria Falls attached to a bunjee chord), embraces all my quirks, and stands by patiently, as I anally retentively count every piece of rice his 11 yr has just dropped on the floor while eating take out. That, my friends, is called HITTING THE JACK POT.

ACKNOWLEDGING THAT CERTAIN THINGS MAY NOT GO AS PLANNED

When I wrote this (last week) I was on a train to Morrisburg to start our Christmas rounds with family and friends. On New Years Eve, I barely made it to midnight, was having body aches and chills, and was dealing with an angry back.

The next night, Jan 1st, 2018, I could barely move without feeling like someone was stabbing me in the back.

Here comes the raw truth of what has been going through my mind now, for several months. I’m TERRIFIED of dying. Always have been. Even more so now that I have a wedding date a little less than 8 moths away. Usually an optimist, now that I have a date looming I can’t help but think about all the possible ways the universe might interfere with me actually getting to that day.

On January 1st, I felt like death. Exhausted from all the visiting, and over indulging, and sleeping in older, not so supportive beds, AND dealing with INTENSE back pain, as well as an upset stomach, my mind got flooded with memories of my mother when she was going through chemo. Before I knew what was happening, I was uncontrollably sobbing, because I am SO scared of ever having to go through it too. I don’t know how long this lasted, but I can tell you in that moment, when Craig held me and let me cry so hard I was hyperventilating (at which point he helped calm me down, you know, so I could breathe), I’ve never been more certain that this one part of my life, is super solid. Craig is there with me in my most vulnerable moments, free of judgement, always.

The next morning, after another sleepless, pain filled night, I found out that a contract I’ve had for 4 and half years, was coming to an end, due to a network re-brand. A day I knew would come eventually, just with really sucky timing in this case. Again, Craig was there at my side as I cried. And cried. And cried some more. In my “PLAN,” this job would have kept going at least until the end of the year, allowing me a little breathing room after I got married, to figure out my next move.

It was not to be.

Today, I’m feeling a little more optimistic. I’ve had a few different physical therapy sessions on my back, and am trying to look at the bright side of not being bound to a weekly gig. I’m choosing to put my energy into focusing on what’s next, the possibilities that await, and mostly, that I have the partner I do, to move through all the unknown with.

What has this got to do with the wedding?

We can try and plan the shit out of this wedding, but the reality is, some things might get dropped along the way, or may not go down exactly the way we picture it in our heads, because that’s life.

Chances are the one thing I can guarantee, is that I will be a blubbery mess (tears of joy obvi) because I get to marry Craig , surrounded by most of my favourite people on the planet. Can’t get much better than that really.

#beastgettingmarried lusciousbeast marriage ericamcmaster craiglauzon weddingwebsites weddings wedding weddingplanning rileygrey

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catcrazylady7 · 7 years

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It occurred to me that this, the topic of community, would be a great thing to blog about as I come back, once again, from an extended absence from my blog.

What has kept me from blogging this past almost month has been a community, my local faith community, and the commitments I have made to them.

My last post was on January 27th and I wanted to fill you in on what my February has been like thus far. First, though, I want to offer my deepest apologies for the lack of posts.

I have been more fulfilled and happy this past month, even though I have been extremely busy to the point of not getting to blog as much. Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy blogging.

I plan to continue blogging but my posts will be as I am able to write them. If you are following this blog please know you have my thanks and I enjoy talking with you in the comments.

You will continue to be notified when I post a new blog. I hope that by expanding my time spent in my community I will have more topics and thoughts to share with all of you.

In one sense by being away from my blog, at times, I will actually be bringing more to it when I do write posts. At least that is my hope.

The reason being part of a community is so important to me is because I feel like I am part of a team, that my contributions and volunteering of my skills matters and they are valued.

That is an amazing feeling. I think we are all hard wired with the need to belong.

From February 1st until today has been an extremely busy time for me. As many of you know I run the soundboard at our church. I also help clean the top floor of the church every week.

This means I have to be there for worship practice in order to set the correct levels ahead of Sunday morning’s services. We usually practice once a week on a Tuesday night.

Last week we had two practice nights during the week because we are introducing new songs to our church congregation. Our congregation consists of mostly elderly men and women.

These folks are so used to singing hymns and as a result, our church is not attracting any younger people in the community to come out and join our church or hear the gospel.

The younger people are looking for a place to worship with a more contemporary feel and more upbeat music. So, the plan is to slowly (we are talking baby steps here) introduce new songs that are just that.

There will be a great deal of the music the congregation knows and loves but one new song will be added to the mix. That new song will then be repeated every Sunday for a few weeks so that people can learn and become familiar with it.

We started this Sunday (today as I am writing this) which, as I mentioned, was the reason for extra practice this week. It seemed to go over well but we shall see if the pastor gets much flak before next Sunday.

On top of the soundboard and cleaning I do at the church I have been asked to take pictures of all the special events held at the church. These photographs will be posted on the church website.

The pastor explained it to me as a kind of free advertising to show anyone visiting the website that our church is active and doing things.

It is hoped that the pictures will help make others feel welcome and make them curious enough to come out and join us to see for themselves what we have to offer.

All I need to do is take the pictures as there is someone who takes care of the website and posts the Sunday message audio file on it every week. I record this as part of my duties on the soundboard.

There have been two special events at the church this month and a third one began tonight.

On February 5th we held a free movie night to show a screening of the movie God Is NOT Dead 2. There was a modest turnout for the movie and I tried my best to take some photos even with the low light conditions.

On February 11th we held Valentine’s Day Dinner (actually just ahead of Valentines Day) which included a half hour of worship songs prior to going downstairs for a full roast beef dinner.

That was an event where I wore a couple of hats; soundboard and photographer. The music portion of the evening was an extra half hour of music to practice on top of our regular Sunday worship.

The man in the bottom picture holding the coffee pot is our pastor. His name is Pastor Dave Johnston.

Tonight, February 19th we began a six-week course entitled Laugh Your Way To A Better Marriage. My husband and I attended this same course at our previous church many years ago.

We are attending this one as well since it is a good refresher and the speaker is hilarious to listen to while getting his points across loud and clear.

Besides, I am the official photographer and once again this is a low light situation so I must try to get the best shots possible.

I must take photos all while respecting that attendees may not want their photo taken for a website given that this is a marriage seminar. Here are the photos I took tonight.

I am thankful that there are five more Sunday nights to try and get better photos before they are posted to the church website.

Anyway, on top of all this activity at the church, I have been creating videos and uploading them to my YouTube channel, answering emails and watching what I can of other YouTubers videos that I am subscribed to.

I am pleased to say my channel is finally starting to take off; I am gaining subscribers, 726 at last count, and doing a little better in the financial department.

I have also been working on my storybook for Ethan here and there when I can. I now have a name for the dragon Ethan befriends and a rough outline of the story.

Next up is the plotting of what the wording on each page will be and the general layout of the book. From there I will get down to practicing drawing Ethan’s likeness in the various poses that the wording suggests.

I will also need to create a dragon that looks friendly and yet can transform into a fierce companion ready to come to Ethan’s aid when he needs him.

In my spare time, that is after all of the above plus doing dishes, cooking meals, doing laundry (in other words – life) I have been doing a fair bit of reading.

Reading is my favorite pastime by far. Doing more reading was one of my New Year’s Intentions and on that score, I am happy to say I am achieving what I set out to do.

This year’s Goodreads Book Challenge I have set 40 books as my goal. So far this year I have read seven books, that is two books ahead of schedule. Currently, I have a further two books on the go. The one I read at night before sleep and the other I read during the day.

It is now eleven o’clock at night and I will end this post here so I can proofread and edit in order to publish it to my blog.

Thank you, as always, for stopping by to read my thoughts today/tonight. I really appreciate you all being out there. Until my next post – remember it is important to do what makes you happy. This is not a dress rehearsal…this is life and it is too short to spend it unhappy. :)

I Am Finding That Being Part Of A Community Is So Important To Me It occurred to me that this, the topic of community, would be a great thing to blog about as I come back, once again, from an extended absence from my blog.

#blogging #church #commitments #community #happiness #life #music #photography #skills #soundboard #volunteering #writing

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