#i mean im being whiny

[dishsaop]

does anyone have recommendations for fictional media that has like. actual lesbians in it. not like supergirl Two White Skinny Girls, One Blonde and One Brunette Kiss media, or "its implied lesbianism!!!" but just regular fucking lesbians

#i say lesbians but i guess i mean sapphic #im just like. tired of gnawing #and of men also. sorry men in my life i love you but on god if i have to pretend one more man is butch just to get #content that isnt m/m or m/f im going to turn into a horse and run into the wilderness until im saved from the glue factory by a plucky #young woman except instead of letting her have her formative summer where she trains me and bonds w me and wins a competition w me #im going to commit horse suicide in front of her & change her life forever. just because im so tired of bland CW-marketable women kissing & #digging for scraps in a refuse bin while brushing aside 7002993829292929939292929399394 gay and het romances #m text #i will also take nonfictional lesbians if its like a story #not to be whiny on main but one of the hardest hurdles i had to jump wasnt realizing i was a lesbian. i came out to myself and to friends a #lesbian multiple times. but i would always walk it back when a friend would express doubt or a male friend would ask me out #bc i dont and especially then didnt know very many lesbians in person. and so i had to turn to examples #and all i fucking had were fictional women who liked men. or fictional lesbians who were so cleaned and sanitized and prettified #(you all know what i mean right. the 2 skinny white girls one blonde one brunette. im not crazy right) #and i would be like. i dont feel things when i look at these fictional lesbians so i guess i belong back here #(this is also bc my gender ended up being fuckier than i realized but shhhhh) #I WAS GOING SOMEWHERE WITH THESE TAGS but theyre too long and im lost. #anyway the point is if people werent so fucking weird abt fictional or onscreen lesbians maybe thered be a lot more people comfortable bein #out as lesbian #like sorry but this awful ouroboros of 'all lesbians onscreen have to be cute and sanitized' meaning that people write and believe wlw has #to be cute and pure and sanitized (OR a 'badge of honor' bc good for u u doodled two women together or had it as a background in ur fic) #meaning that therefore all portrayals of lesbianism continue to be like this. is just #and im also gonna be honest theres probably a lot of good sapphic media im just in the wrong circles to have stumbled into lol. so #yknow. personal viewer bias here #but i still like swing wildly between overly brandishing my dykeness as a badge to feel like im proving im lesbian #and like. backing up under a blanket bc i dont wanna be weird or annoying or freak people out #but if people just Saw Normal Ass Lesbians. aough. #im going to watch revolutionary girl utena one of these days even if i struggled w the writing style the first few episodes #I JUST WANNA SEE AN OLD BUTCH ONSCREEN GET SOME PUSSY. #like it also doesnt help im mostly femme4butch so seeing 2 femmes on screen is like. okay cool so what. but only femmes are 'marketable'

[kaladinkholins]

i think im gonna take a break from my fic to write my original work instead

#something something lack of engagement makes it discouraging for all artists and writers something something #i think the good thing about how i finished writing 'the stories we tell' before i even started posting a single chapter #is that the writing process was fun in the sense that i did it completely for me #there was no external pressure to write faster or try to write more 'interesting' chapters #whatever i wrote i wrote it for the sake of the story. because i wanted to #but posting a WIP and writing chapter by chapter? at least for me i def feel some pressure to please #and when i dont get much of a response on each update it's kinda disheartening #by response i mean people engaging with the actual like. contents. the lines i wrote. idk. #IGNORE ME IM BEING WHINY AND UNGRATEFUL #i genuinely love all my readers and commenters and everyone following along with the story #i just get too lost in my head and feelings sometimes #which is why i think its necessary for me to take a break and take my mind off it by writing my own original stuff for a while #at least for a few days #shut up haydar #on writing.log

[lecliss]

Started watching Bastard!! and I'm very pissed to find out Wendee Lee is voicing yet another black woman. Like I know she wasn't publicly racist until the (failed) Yoruichi recast last year and this came out in 2022 but like, I don't wanna fuckin hear her ever again after that.

#i mean when it comes to bleach i know im gonna have to anyway cuz im too attached to the dub but like :/ #remember folks! one va being a shitty person can ruin the entire thing for everyone! #as attractive as schneider's en voice is im just gonna watch in jp. at least hes also voiced by taniyama so theres a plus #anairis deserved to be yoruichi btw. fuck yall and fuck wendee for being whiny babies #personal #AND BY THE WAY! DID ANYONE COMPLAIN WHEN CHAD WAS RECAST BY AN ACTUAL HISPANIC MAN????? #ONLY WHEN ITS THE WAIFU YOU JERKED OFF TO WHEN YOU WERE 13 IS IT A PROBLEM! I SEE IT! I FUCKIN SEE IT!!! #sorry i get so into en vas that i actually talk about the drama. these are MY celebrities. we all have our vices. forgive me 😔 #i will do it again tho

[rackartyg]

“on my second playthrough of astarion’s romance his act 1 scenes made me feel so icky” good! they’re supposed to!

#this is whiny and petty and not meant to harsh anyone’s vibe im just complaining #i understand why people do it and they’re obviously allowed to etc etc #but it peeves me when i see so many people headcanoning #their tav spotting that something’s up with astarion and not sleeping with him #like. i get it. but also there’s a reason his romance is the way it is y’know?? #unless you’re playing as karlach there’s no way to romance him without having sex with him and. it is that way on purpose #(and astarion is *so fucking mean* to karlach because he can’t have sex with her because it makes his brain short circuit! #but this is never included in the sexless tavstarion headcanons) #i understand not being into that type of story but if that’s the case why romance astarion at all #urgh #she speaks #arctic plays bg3

[investingestincest]

all harem protags deserve the exact amount of care as their girls crush idgaf, screw the small blush i need the protag to go beet red ! screw the dot eyes i need them to be big and shiny enough to the point of ridiculousness make him go kyaaaa and uweeh, is a straight harem protag forbidden from being cute ??? do they sign a waiver that says being cute and silly = death and misery ???? "he's supposed to be a self insert" well what if i went to insert myself into him???? damn

#the daily struggles of a pansexual who loves men too much #who also has a weird attachment to harem protags fsr #good thing i can draw #because i would've probably gone mad #lol im so annoying sorry #seeing a zoom in of her shiny lips and his...nothing #being a boy means having no lips apparently #btw these are just wordless complaints the anime IS good im just a whiny and picky bitch lol

[dirt-str1der]

Whatever

#and its the only listed entry for his relationships ? #does he not talk or interact with anyone else in the series ? #Trigun loveblog #he loves vash #damien do nooootttt read this this is spoilersd #it makes me smile so much that the entry is written like this because they could easily have said something like ... #'theyre siblings with an intense rivalry stemming from their difference in ideology' but no its straight to the point #like yeah knives really did make that face when he saw the scars. and yeah he did scream in rage and grief when vash was slowly dying #and yeah vash was the one who gave him the will to live again and yeah knives is the reason vash is alive #like seriously whatever #i mean of course vash is the reason knives lost everything and knives is the reason vash is constantly putting his life in danger #this and the way knives gently hands vash a gun and tells him to shoot someone in stampede is so funny #hes like whats wrong ? (gentle) go on and do it (reassuring) and when vash is shaking too much and lowers the gun hes like (fond sigh of #exasperation) i have to do everything for you. hes so funny he loves his brother #and what right does knives have to be calling vash his little brother in the manga. you two were conceived in the same instant chill ... #im just very glad that loving vash is one of knives core personality traits and the other is being evil. its not trigun if your brother #isnt about to burn the whole world down just to create paradise for the two of you. and i cannot get enough of how one sided it is at the #start like the first thing knives does after they crash land is to attempt to help vash stand. the second thing he does is beat the hell out #of vash because hes annoying and whiny. and vash has tried to kill knives so many times but in the end he just cant do it #knives has been on the other side of his barrel so many times and so many times vash would get mad at him and then fail to pull the trigger #its so cutee theyre beautiful twin boys ... exactly the same height ... sorry im just happy again that tessla is in stampede

[scarlct-vvitch]

i think my new thing is gonna be saying shit on here that would get me death threats on tiktok. the actoar books are bad

#people loooooooove this series #and if you do then like by all means enjoy it #but i did not like it at all #i thought the worldbuilding was so weird #and the magic system made NO sense #i need consistently sarah come on #and every single character annoyed me #i didnt like any of them #the main girl was whiny and the main guy was flat #and yes i know they develop in book two or whatever #but THEY SHOULD HAVE A STRONG BASE IN BOOK ONE #i should not have to wait for them to be tolerable to read about #they have already committed the worst sin they possibly could: BEING ANNOYING #anyway #also should clarify im not even really a book snob #ive read tons of stuff #and i even like other fantasy/romance/trashy books #but this one was bad #acotar

[happy10thousandyears]

Con thoughts

#honestly I really appreciate the creator of my ex fandom trying to give me job opportunities but I think if I have to work in my ex fandom #the creator is really chill and awesome but #as an official artist I’ll try to overdose to die everyday #or at least if I don’t normalize before then #I need to normalize #I mean it’s not even like im currently being traumatized I just spiral #everything I interact with anything outside of my immediate interest circle #because everyone are like so lobotomized in there like I feel im a person among zombies #like how can you just be on a comedy show and have people laugh by just referencing stuff #I don’t get their humor their lack of appreciation for creative effort and their general mental attitude #they are so averse to engaging with anything that aren’t in your face with garish gaudy colors #it’s an ugly franchise and an artless thoughtless fandom #I feel like the opening scene of shizuku where im just siting among people who im utterly alienated to #thinking about the end of the world #I know I sound really whiny to my friends bc I was telling them about stuff but #also it's not like it's hard on me or anything I spiral kinda daily unprompted already it's just . wow it's not in my head only anymore #the insanity is irl.. it's just more surreal to have the zombies I would despise irl around me #it’s kinda despairing that what I like and who I am are utterly incompatible with the #hundreds of people surrounding me during the 3 days of this con #it's like the online fandom but real and more massive #I do kinda sound ungrateful that I'm going to a con and meeting the creator of my fave series is like . rare but also #MAN kinda a bummer I wish my fave character's VA is there so I can gouge his eyes out (joke) AHEM have a Polite conversation with him #because he played the character in the way I loathed (hammy) like I would ASK him to read the books the character is in .or I start gouging #but I am also having fun??? #a white man mansplained my fave to me (who was wearing whole ass ita bag of my fave) bc he though he know more about him than me bc he read #the character's wiki entry . I love it it's surreal I feel like an older god . I can smite this man yet he yaps on unknowingly #I've drawn 2k+ fanart of this obscure deeplore character you've read on the wiki mr tenth doctor cosplayer white man #I can cast u into hellfire .. ? Mr white American man ..

[skinnyphobicbutch]

I think I need a sensory deprivation tank. And also I'm pretty sure I should be sober when I'm by myself

#If I can just figure out how to stop feeling forever I think that'd be great. I literally do not know what is #ok Thats a lie actually. did you know that being on your mood stabilizers and Not Being Depressed anymore actually means that anxiety has #Just. full range of motion #have been reflecting a lot recently and realized that I'm really very deeply ashamed about being. like this. and I am deeply ashamed about #needing medication #how do I come to terms with that. this is shit im going to have to feel and deal with for the rest of my fucking life and I ALSO have to get #over a serious unintentional emotional hurdle that I didn't even fucking realize? #i know I probably sound pretty whiny but that ok because I am fucking whiny. this shit sucks and whining is better then killing yourself #i miss my friends . no ones gone or inaccessible I just miss them

[bunnyb34r]

Well glad to know I'm not the only one not feeling the Christmas season this year. Mom isnt either

Now we dont know why, but here are my guesses. Feel free to place your bets.

Is it:

Bc our aunt/great-aunt died and essentially dissolved the family

|_> Bc of this we've faced so much bullshit from the surviving family we have left.

Bc the only remaining family we have are major assholes aside from like 4 people.

Long covid?

Work stress/ working under a tyrant piece of shit.

Bc I'm an adult now so the *magic* is gone?

All of the above??

#marquilla #we still havent made cookies and are like i want the cookies but i dont want to make the cookies... #so we agreed we can do it after christmas if need be #i really think it's all of that combined. like my g-aunt dying really tore this family apart. we weren't like close close before but i mean #everyone started taking sides (the executors (my mom) vs my cousins. like listen you motherfuckers she left you [insert number bc i also #got this amount and am not disclosing]. you little freaks need to get over the fact that she loved me as much as if not more than you. #maybe bc i wasn't a fucking entitled brat and was always a polite well behaved child (for her) and didnt take my mommy/daddy issues out on #her. you already got: 2 free cars. 3 fully paid for weddings. 4 college degrees (one that you're not even using bc you havent worked since #college bc you became a tradwife. (not dissing stay at home moms im dissing her making college a BIG DEAL for her and then just #essentially saying haha thanks for the 100k in tuition but no ❤). COUNTLESS hours and money poured #into your lives from her and our g-uncle. amongst the 4 of you. (only 1 is not a brat but thats bc they pretend she doesnt exist bc shes #annoying and autistic so a drain on them they were ever so happy to dump on their dad) #you aren't entitled to any of that. that was a GIFT. your inheritance was well thought out. it is an insult for you to suggest otherwise #anyway so theyre being whiny brats and oh boo hoo you exects are SO MEAN to poor Ally who didnt sign the fucking will and thus held up #$50k FROM A CHURCH. and my uncle (not their dad. their moms brother) is taking their side. his wife is a massive piece of shit ab it too. #dont know whose side dog cousin is on bc shes close to my mom but very close to them. and i know lesbian cousin is on moms side to some #degree. and idgaf what Murderer cousin thinks bc that bitch can and will rot in hell. #so anyway any one we could possibly spend time with this season is either dead or hates us. or lives states away and won't be in til after #and only for a day anyway. and we just dont have the fucking energy to deal with anything

[piplupod]

i am going to be soooo fucked for this therapy appt _(:_」∠)_

#going to just play sudoku i guess. fuck me fuck this fuck sleep #doesnt help that im also an insomniac dhdjdmsl so. weh. #I've ran through five whole scenes for my story writing and usually i only get thru one at most before sleep hits #the issue is every time I think mother is done moving around upstairs she starts up again #and then i get upset and then my heart starts pounding and then i Definitely cannot sleep #and then by the time i settle down and am just abt to drift off she starts moving around again and it repeats over and over and over #i feel so ill dnfkdl i wish i was sick rn too so that I'd be allowed to be outwardly miserable and she might care that she's keeping me up #but alas dndksl i havent caught whatever it is that both parents have had now (not covid apparently) so i just have to keep being nicey nice #i hate this so much djfkdl she is sick and that sucks so bad and she is miserable and thats awful but also. i would like to sleep. #but i should not be upset bc she is suffering and if i wanted to sleep so bad i just Would i guess. i must not need sleep if i cant sleep #like if i rly needed it I'd probably be able to sleep through any amount of noise ? idk #hello 3am my most despised frenemy. i love you for being a good number but i hate seeing you bc it means im Awake #if i cry in my therapy appt maybe something good will happen !! maybe i will be taken away and put somewhere safe where i can sleep #eeuggfhhhh. weh. whiny whiny sorry fjfkdl i will go play sudoku and pretend that I've already slept several hours and the day will come #pippen needs 2nd breakfast

[voguewoozi]

mingyu was sooooo babygirl in the new gose..... that part when he was alone and calling out for jihoon broke me he was scared 😔

#the repeated 우지 형... followed by the one whiny 형 as he ran looking for him #and jihoon just replying w 왜.... he was Scared he thought you got taken stop being mean........ #i love mingyu's little whiny voice so much you do not understand. no one does. #svt #mingyu #im talking again

[martyrbat]

👍👍

#im bout to be whiny before getting nauseated at being kimda vulnerable and end up deleting this but just #shoutout to my friend (who was the only person i ever shared my writing with for over a year) #just telling me they've always just skimmed my fics AND infodumps because they dont care. like has read at most a handful of me talking & #usually skips any rare audio message that i sent when SUPER excited and made up drama to have an excuse to change topics #again. for over a year. #then getting guilt trippy when i was hurt by it until i apologize instead which !! lmao fuck ok ! #its just... very hmpth :/ bc it eas already a shitty night and week of nonstop migraine. and then this #and taking into account im someone who NEVER blocks any of my friends tags or doesnt read and invest myself in their interests #even if i dont like it; i love seeing people (even strangers) excited and talking about what they like so of course im going to #at least watch them talk on it and/or actually research into it because i want to be able to understand their happiness! #and because its whats important to them !! i dont expect the same and im not shaming anyone for not doing the same its fine I guess #but to tell me? and to say they dont read my writing or give a single shit about me talking about something #when i always put 100% into their interests? am i that shitty of a writer and that obnoxious to listen to lmao #like i feel shitty for even being hurt over it and even venting because you guys arent here for that and its mean to force it on ur dash #and i dont want to be too whiny but also. jfc man #ill stay silly starting tomorrow and post about batmans balls or whatever. sorry for the vent just. bleh. #that ‘december please bro please im begging just a break please man’ post but its me throughout this February too apparently

[akamikazae]

Tumblr tells me I have notes on stuff...but I can't see them..? like it says comments/re-blogs/likes but they don't show up...? theres nothing there

#I know im being whiny but #its actually really annoying #kaz complains #tumblr why are you like this #so I guess if you've interacted with my stuff to any degree thanks #and on the plus side if someones being mean at least I can't see it

[pixiethoughtsfairyfeelings]

I hate feeling clingy it's the worst but if you are clingy with me?? I'm gonna get so fuckin possessive 😂💀

#babygirl #text #what can i say i like mine cute and very clingy #it's not even funny #being whiny and clingy with me makes me wanna be mean just so you'll whine more #which is lmao #and I hate it whrn people are like noo be clingy with me i love it #because im still like ??? yeah but where's the line #there's always a line #even if you don't know where the line is #:///

[nottyalien]

Why are butters' parents and tolkien's parents named almost the same😭😭

Like seriously u guys I know it's not that important but-

#linda stotch #stephen stotch #linda black #steven black #no i mean seriously #this is not good for my brain #like they couldn't name them differently #im sorry for being a whiny bitch lmao