#idk how I feel about this but posting it 👍

[sh309]

I cradled him in my arms, my sweet boy. I took him away.

#cw disturbing imagery #idk how I feel about this but posting it 👍 #going through every art style why not #fanart #tmc fanart #tmc #the mandela catalogue fanart #the mandela catalogue #tmc adam #adam murray #horror art #analog horror

[tmmylovejoy]

One thing I hate so fucking much about people dig up shit to “cancel” people for is that they are never part of the affected demographic. They are not looking for shit someone did wrong 10 years ago because they want to make sure they’re a good person, they’re doing it because they want an excuse to hate them.

The obvious consequence of this, however, is that suddenly an entire demographic is deeply uncomfortable with a creator who once brought them joy.

A thread recently came out about how when Wilbur Soot was 19 he made a lot of very harmful antisemitic jokes. He is now 25 years old. He has talked numerous times about how much he hates the person he was before he was about 22, and how much he’s grown since then. He’s demonstrated this growth too.

The person who published this thread was not jewish and I would assume that the person who gave them the information is not either.

I am jewish. Seeing these screenshots of “jokes” about the genocide of my people fundamentally hurt me. These screenshots do not show his current beliefs or behaviors. It would be impossible to find these jokes if you hadn’t gone actively searching for them. However I still felt betrayed and panicked, no matter how much I knew that Wilbur has changed. I do not know if I can ever watch his content again and find comfort.

This is the problem with digging into peoples past this way. It is never, and never has been, a selfless act nor a form of activism. It is the very opposite. It is the exploitation of marginalized identities to justify your dislike of someone.

#this is ok to rb 👍 (please rb) #obviously I am not trying to minimize marginalized emotions that get brought up by this sort of thing #because I am one of those ppl. idk if i can ever watch wilbur’s content again. #however there’s also no reason I needed to see that thread. it was not indicative of a current problem. #it feels as though a great comfort of mine was forcibly taken away by someone for no reason. like a little game to play. it’s infuriating. #wilbur soot #adora lore #also not adding a link to the thread cause I don’t think the person who posted it deserves that attention lol #i deleted all my old posts about it because they just like. didn’t accurately show how I felt and i didn’t wanna just have that up #sorry to anyone who has had to watch me process all of this #had a category red tornado siren sounding autism moment for a while there

[whumpy-wyrms]

yk i was having trouble writing tllr chapter 12 because Dew is sick with a fever in the beginning and i just,, idk felt uninspired or something because im not the biggest fan of sickfics or whatever

well now i’m sick with a fever and it’s helll so sorry Dew im gonna have to put you through this now my bad 👍👍 at least i am now inspired

if this post makes no sense it’s because my brain hurts and i’m tired 👍👍👍

#i’m fine it’s just kinda funny #like last night i was writing ahead to chapter 14 because i was stuck on chapter 12 cuz i didn’t know how to write it #and now i’m sick with a fever just like Dew hahahaha sorry buddy but we’re in this together now 👍👍👍 and it’s 105 idk if that’s normal #at least it’s giving me inspiration and i am no longer stuck on it #but i’m too sick to fucking write it!!!! i wanna write uhhgjjfjdjd #ok im done #well actually i had the craziest dream last night #it was about this new animated movie that doesn’t exist and i was watching it/ acting it out as the main character and it was so fucking #cool like i was flyingggg!!! i was a weird purple creature with wings and was flying just like dew it was fucking awesome #like there were so many really cool characters with really creative designs and the antagonist was a weird giant bug who could also fly #so he was chasing me around in the air and it was so cool i was so fast flying around like in a minecraft elytra course #i love vivid dreams like that that feel real and like after the movie was finished i posted on tumblr about how much i loved this new #netflix animated movie and my mutuals were there and also thought it was cool #anyway it was fun i love flying in my dreams i feel so free.. unlike Dewey oopsie sorry buddy #deweyeyeyeye ur so silly i love him SO MUCH #ok im gonna shut up now #wyrms says stuff #fever #fever dream #if i tagged this as irl whump would i also have to tag it as minor whump hahahhaha #idk i wanna play roblox with my mutuals again #mutuals if ur reading this u can literally bother me to play video games all day every day because the answer will always #be an enthusiastic YESS!!!! #i should watch nightmare time today #no dumbass i should REST dumbass ehehheehe #i’m being so annoying again sorry everyone 😼😼😼😼

[strangeswift]

(taylor swift music leak)

me: how can i make this about byler.

((wip?))

#i have more of this edit done but i don't love it yet so idk if i will ever post it. but i liked this part #anyway. need is so byler coded. this part and the chorus are will #ok well the chorus can be mike or will but cmon like it's will #'it's a need. it's a need. i would go anywhere that you lead.' is will's el (i) needs you and she (i) always will #but the other verses are mike comparing his relationship with el to his relationship with will #'passion is a passing thing it's ACCIDENTAL chemistry' #that's mike about el. it's a passing thing. accidental. mike calling meeting el 'not fate not destiny just simple dumb luck' #then 'caught up in a feeling it can be deceiving' HELLLOOO? it can be deceiving comp het ok. #then 'this is like breathing for me' is how natural and easy his relationship with WILL is #then straight into the chorus 'oh it's a need' which is. mike and will. mike needing to be needed and will needing him ok. #so i have plans for editing those parts too but like i said i don't love them rn bc i an not an editor yk. but. here's this for now 👍 #byler #edit

[kithj]

Hey, hope you're doing well! Had a couple questions for you if they're not too personal:

1. Whats your favourite story you've written so far? Is it something public? Is it finished?

2. Do you have any long form non-interactive fiction you've written that's available to read? I would genuinely kill to read something like that from you

hi :-) ohh these are fun...

my favorite story is probably My NovelTM which isn't finished yet, i've written a first draft and now it's just been languishing until i can find the motivation to start a second draft. i finished the first draft in august i think, and started editing it pretty heavily before i realized i was just going to have to rewrite the whole thing again. i'm mostly having trouble with the ending, which always seems to be my problem lmfao... anyways it follows the relationship of Angel and Valerie, after Valerie has been missing for a few months and suddenly returns as a vampire with no memory of Angel or what happened over the months while she was away. it alternates between both their povs in both present day and through flashbacks.

so unfortunately for your second question, no, but i do hope to publish Angel and Valerie's story one day, either traditionally through a small press (lol here's hoping) or by self-publishing it. otherwise my only published work is what's available on my itch.io (siren's call, one day hike, etc)

i am working on a short story for vampire jam, which i'll hopefully be sharing next month. it's still in the form of interactive fiction, published in twine, but it's more of a short story than anything like blood choke or tnp. i also have a butch cowboys and zombies story i've been working on for a while, but i'm not sure when i'll get around to finishing it since it's not a priority project.

i do want to write another novel as well, a very old story i've been kicking around for years, but as usual i haven't been able to come up with an ending for it... but maybe one day.

#one thing that amazes me abt published authors is just. the way they churn out books #how do they have so many ideas.... esp when their stories are so varied #i feel like my work is very one note lmfao one day hike & blood choke & hell's holler& even my vampjamp story& the cowboy story #are all very similar. it makes me feel self conscious tbh like im just writing the same thing over and over #but whatever it's what i need to write rn to keep myself sane even if it's all jsut sad lesbians LOL #i tell myself it's helping me refine the narrative i want to perfect in hell's holler (the novel) #idk i would like to write something more happy eventually #like i want to write a YA book. everyone brace yourselves but i want to write a historical fiction during the early 2000s/2010s #it sounds silly to call it historical fiction but like. it would be #around when gay marriage was legalized in the US & the lead up to it #as well as political/cultural attitudes in the US during that time post 9/11. through a high schooler's perspective #think something like the old american girl doll stories when they were actually historical and educational rather than nostalgia bait #yes i AM bitter about the 90s twins why do you ask #anyways. yeah 👍 #ask #sproongoose

[fruitsyrups]

its that person who co-wrote one of those spidermax snippets, and did u delete this one? :(

Ahhh yes sorry I deleted the ST posts that I was still occasionally getting notifs on. I screenshot all of my deleted posts / still have the drawings saved, if you want me to send them to you ? Bc I know how annoyingly hard it can be to find a reblog of a deleted post sometimes

#i think theres a feature now where you can turn off notifs for specific posts instead of deleting them but i dont know how long thats #been there #i left all of the writing snippets up though!!! bc theyre very good and idk if you guys posted any of them elsewhere #and i think people should be able to see them 👍👍 #it didnt really occur to me that people would feel the same way about my drawings tho 😭 #maybe i shouldve left it up but idk i let the embarassment over old art get the best of me 🫣

[fslurusami]

you know how sometimes theres some popular character and most of the fanstuff is mostly accurate on the surface but you personally have some lived experience shared w this character that enables you to have a deeper understanding of little nuances under the hood that inform things like their decision making and stuff. its on a sliding scale of accuracy of course. personally i mostly get this with my mental disorders with characters such as ogata but sometimes theres LITTLE TINY THINGS that bother me about specifically the various violence related fetishes. and the fact that it bothers me itself bothers me cuz i feel like. "oh Clearly you havent received or inflicted wounds for sexual pleasure". yes obviously they havent done that. nobody else does that. i am abnormal in nature and insane in the head

#obviously not Rlly nobody else im well aware. but it is uncommon. and it doesnt Rlly bother me but i can often tell #yes ienaga vore jokes are funny but i dont think shes into vore based on what we see of her character and attitudes towards cannibalism #however. usami and tsurumi 100% are. tsurumis gay little speech in that scene would not be out of place on a vore sideblog thats EXACTLY #how certain ppl talk about it. thats literally It. tsurumi tokushirou invented vore in 1907 #thats just the most clear cut and easily explainable example i think but there are so many little bits of tiny nuance idek #there are different attitudes of course but i feel like ienaga doesnt rlly feel any Connection to eating ppl and sure there are ocs and #little stories or scenarios about the pred just being like 'yea its just food' cuz some preys find that rlly hot but. irl there arent rlly #any of that kind of pred cuz if they dont care then. they dont care lol. like they dont Care about vore. so theyre not into vore. u know #so i think shes not into vore sexually and such shes literally just here for medicinal purposes or w/e. but that is just my opinion idk #sorry for vore essay in the tags i am autistic 👍 those deviantart stamps are not ironic they are a Warning #if anybody like. cares about being 1/5th of a mm off in their depiction of masochism or smthng i will answer questions. but be prepared for #me to get at least this ^^^ autistic about it. i dont have a phd in masochism but i can at least say with certainty that i have never #said 'it hurts so good' in real life. the full sentence like that is just a little cheesy in my opinion. 'it hurts' usually speaks 4 itself #og post

[peapod20001]

I’m the type that can and will cry if think too hard <3

#random post #me tag ∠( ᐛ 」 ) |/ #I’m not an overly emotional person in the stereotypical way. but I do get in my feels when thinking about life and the experience of living #I’m like. constantly explaining things to myself cus there’s never really a time or place to talk about it #also my method of explaining things is very not coherent sometimes. so it takes me a bit to really get my point across in a comprehensible #way. I’m a big thinker. I have many thoughts and ideas a views. a daily thing of mine is noticing problems #and then fixing them in my head with thought out explanations and motives and outcomes #it’s like I’m talking to someone else. much like how I format my text posts. that’s how my inner monologue is #me talking to myself is actually me talking to someone else. someone that isn’t real #anyways it’s a daily occurrence. every day of my life is spent with thoughts similar to those breaking down a movie #lots of thoughts from adhd. compulsive thoughts from ocd. overwhelming thoughts from autism. distressing thoughts from bpd #ya. this isn’t a vent I just need to like. see the thoughts in writing so I can do smth else. like eat this muffin ive been staring at for #over an hour now <3 mmmbfbg yea muffins are hard to eat now cus I had some with mold and food mold especially is a big nono for me #spend like. five minutes examining the damn thing before I even consider taking a bite. I’m very hungry an thirsty </3 #when your mouth is so dry you can taste your own mouth 👍 I’m experiencing #nothing in particular. just experiencing. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I like having an experience and living #drank my tea and I had like. hallucinations of like an alcohol prep pad. I’ve been using those in my ear cus. tmi. had a pimple that’s #causing problems so mom suggested that. it burned! which means it worked so word. I’ve noticed lately that both me AND my family have been #using ‘word’ a lot. dad says we’ve been saying it but no we haven’t. if we had I’d have BEEN saying it. maybe we’ve used it before for a bit #but now it’s back. idk. I’ve said it in class on more than one occasion lmao I don’t look like the type to say smth like that but whatever #it’s like when I used to say bro after every sentence like 10 years ago lol. we’re a family of parrots we repeat eachother a lot #I started saying I love you out of no where and they started doing it too. we whistle at eachother from across the house. sing ear worms #together. quote funny things at every opportunity and drive the joke into the ground. everyone in this house is a different kind of mentally #I’ll and it’s the most beautiful clash of personalities because we’re all so annoying and we love eachother so much and also our #communication is shit because some ppl have hearing loss and another is a short fused child and some are quick to interrupt and some dont #get a word in and some just can’t explain and some can’t understand. we get there eventually at some point. we don’t get the full grasp of #how much we love eachother yet. but we’re gettin there. anyways this went into several different directions but they’re all good ones #I think. if you read all this good on you! this is my brain 24/7/365 haha ok love you

[bethiewhimsy]

i’ve been stricken with so many problems.

#1) the fucking yearning. go away. i don’t need romantic love. it SUCKS and it’s BAD. disgusting. #2) a sudden repulsion for skirts???? WHAT THE HELL. I LOVE SKIRTS. BUT I CANT BRING MYSELF TO WEAR THEM RN. it’s so fucking weird. #3) i have to actually decide what to do with my life. like. big things. like getting a damn apartment. #4) the crippling fear of growing up has resurfaced. i just turned 20. i don’t want to do this shit anymore. #anyway i’m fine 👍 #i suppose this is a vent post??? but in the tags. #haven’t vented on tumblr dot com in a hot hot hot minute #not since my irl friend started following me (hopefully they’re not reading this but if they are: hi) #ranting in the tags feels SO much safer. like. no one’s coming in here #OH ANOTHER THING. #5) a fucking midterm is here and it takes EFFORT. #it’s whatever im just feeling feelings and that’s all right #at least i have a fun little thing to look forward to this weekend #im going to see a ballet !!! #but damn……::::that makes me think about how i’ll never actually do anything with my life. #like we can’t all be on the stage but hell #like??? the knowledge that it only gets worse from here???????????? what the actual hell #and sometimes i think about how i’ll always have to be in the closet. #which sometimes im completely fine with and other times it hurts me a lot #idk. IDK. #anyway. im 20 and i don’t know what im doing with my life and ive never had a lover and i don’t have many friends #and i don’t have any passions or dreams or goals and we’re all only here to one day die. #damn i guess this is why people journal #maybe i should pick up journaling #i think it’d help tbh #anyway im rlly truly actually done now #edit: I HAVE ANOTHER PROBLEM #6) MY PERIOD IS MAKING ME UPSET. everything hurts and im gonna be so nauseous and gross tomorrow help me. pain & agony #7) i cant fall asleep!!!!!!!!!!! but im so tired!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #8) im gonna have to sit thru a transphobic + misogynistic + toxic ass chapel teaching tomorrow.

[risingsunresistance]

wow i lost followers FAST, was it for being a deo enjoyer or because i changed my url

#''i wanna check one more thing before i go to bed'' *clicks blog tab* ''wait HOW MANY???'' #jhdkjfjd #doing what makes me happy instead of continuing to let myself be sad for the sake of keeping my tumblr friends pleased #screw that i talk about mcyt on my own terms now. otherwise it's just hypixel and whatever else i feel like yelling about 👍 #which i have said. SO MANY TIMES. but the url change really makes it ya know #i feel better about it #and i guess ppl are finally taking a hint. i am being serious when i say i'm not posting abt techno as much nowadays #it's too hard sorry idk what else to tell you ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #go find someone who can deal with it better. im still halfway stuck in denial *]=+%*=]*]*{= #chat #goodnight again o/

[databent]

i have the most autistic cat on the planet. hes extra sensitive to certain sounds (refused to wear his collar until i took the bell off of it). he stims (slides the fleshy part of his paws down the surface of the posters on my wall to hear and feel them make that weird squeaky noise). he never meows like literally ever. he likes being petted but Only when hes standing on a surface that puts him at an equal height with me. he has a favorite plastic bin on the windowsill that he sleeps in like every afternoon and i dont know what he would do if i moved it. truly the Autism Creature

#i know people say all cats are autism beasts (especially compared to dogs) and i agree but this creature is EXTRA autism beast #hes so autism coded. i look at him and im like wow hes just like me for real #and the poster thing... i dont even know how to describe it except stimming vhfnfbgh!! he specifically avoids using his claws and has been- #-doing it for months without ever actually scratching or tearing or pulling down a single poster i seriously think he just likes the feeling #FOR THE RECORD: i know cats cant Have Autism this post is just me relating to my cats behaviors from an autistic perspective👍 #oh and for anyone that is familar with my cats and is curious the one im talking about here is Earl Grey !! my little gentleman #sowwy idk how these tags got so long -w- #st #.pdf

[seithr]

rl chatterin in tags, dont worry about it just feel like talking about recent stuff. for those who dont care look at this birdthang i won on xiv then. my silly big bird..

#i dont owe explanation to anyone yeah i kno but i was going through something kinda rough the last little while and wanted to disappear #idk if it was at all noticeable but i feel like acknowledging it is healthier than feeling embarassed pretending i was Totally Fine. #alas im back and im... still just gona post on as normal. i can enjoy my Own Circle Of Enjoyment because im allowed to enjoy parts of life #even if i felt like utter death it doesnt mean i have to drag myself back to it once im finally crawling out. #it doesn't mean it didn't happen. doesn't mean it didn't hurt. but i dont have to reopen the wounds to prove something yknow. #i want to be alright and I will take these. when i feel i want to be happy i should not deny the pleasure of messaging friends #or little joys of any kind no matter how 'insignificant it is' next to my real stresses. you have to have something you smile about #and when you're ready to again why try and put it off? anyways. no idea if this makes sense. im tired but good i think. #i have to give myself little hype up shounen talks about joys and loves and life sometimes. its just gonna happen. #armour clanking #however i AM allowed to feel a little shy talking and being honest again so this is scheduled . hello. gootbye. ya boy hanging on 👍 #possibly employed boy at last even. probably contributed to getting better was that hope. ok no more sharing for real GOODNIGHT (MORNING)

[smitherscreens]

i went to go say hi to the people camped out for seattle in the hopes of making friends and it was the most awkward interaction of my life :(

#they were very nice but i left on the verge of tears lmfao #i’ve been incapable of making friends these past few years for some reason :( #people talk a lot about how they’ve met so many friends through the clique and i want desperately to be able to relate to that #i’m not even sure if i want to camp out anymore . like if i’m just going to feel alone i might as well do that in the comfort of my home #whatever idk #once again the people i talked to were very nice so this is a personal failing not a ‘the clique is so mean wahh’ thing #i got tumblr mobile to make this post from the bus stop 👍 #s talks #tw: personal

[medicasino]

Oh god this is going to be a nightmare to figure out (i'm drawing Mikan because I just really... wanted to fsr? And i do not know if i'm going to maintag it as dr since on one hand. The dr fandom terrifies the shit out of me because i have been there and it was scary . but also i dont want people who dont want to see dr content to see my dr fan? art)

#affie txt #Describing it as fanwork is questionable because i havent actively touched dr in ages lol #and have many issues with not only the series's content in General (especially the racism and how the cast is treated) #but also Mikan's treatment especially #and also x2. It is literally just kin art . I still need to learn more actively about kinning and whatnot but yeah no um #i am such a fucking Mikan kin its unreal she's honestly just. I see myself as her #I can still separate us if needed but shes like. Shes essentially me yeah 👍 #DONT KILL ME FOR BEING A KIN TRENDER I HAVE BEEN APPROVED BY MY KIN FRIENDS (thank u julian for helping me realize LMFAO) #Also im so used to saying kinnie but i feel like i've heard that term was originally mocking so i am trying not to use it but #ITS HARD because i saw it as wholly neutral at first augh. Anyways yeah sorry for kinposting i Guess? #Also jumpscare bc i forgot if i said i kinned mikan on here before #anyhows the drawing's not done but uh. Yeah #I honestly dont really want to post my art here that often anymore considering how shitty this site is #But its also hard bc its one of the more mainstream social medias i use besides idk instagram and youtube??? #And i want attention . Sorry #Anyways yeah. Maybe ill post a wip here

[skyburger]

do NOT ask me a question and then let me go on wikipedia to check something you WILL receive really bizarre useless information

#case in point: just reblogged a post asking if i had seen a particular movie #i just wanted to put in the tags that i knew the movie but hadnt seen it. but naturally of course i had to be like hmmm #why DO i know this movie? #and this ended with me talking about the colonel's dialogue in metal gear solid 2 sons of liberty. so like. 👍 #I ALWAYS FEEL SO BAD FOR THE OPS OF THESE POSTS LIKE IM SORRY!!! I HAVE ADHD!!!! #u are all luckier than my poor mother though she hears so much random fucking bullshit #fortunately we are both big fans of absolutely useless trivia and shit. thats how i ended up telling her about how the ant bully was #the jimmy neutron studio's last project before they shut down #they went bankrupt i think #idk how we got there though because like twenty minutes earlier in the same conversation i was looking at the fbi's most wanted list #in my defense. i wanted to see if i knew the names of any other fbi most wanted members other than like. bin laden. (i did not) #you know how ponies in mlp have cutie marks and thats their special talent? i think mine would be like the ability to just #go down really stupid rabbit holes and retain absolutely useless trivia. but oh im having a grand old time #shit i just realized im rambling in the tags. AGAIN. at least its my own post this time #this is my own post right. hold on #okay yes it is phew. #ENOUGH RAMBLING THOUGH IM STOPPING MYSELF!!! #PEACE AND LOVE ON PLANET EARTH. MIAMI MAKE SOME FUCKING NOISE #muffin mumbles

[homoerotvic]

even though you were possibly the one to hurt my feelings the most in my entire life in every single dream you appear in i forgive you

#and it literally ruins my entire day. even thinking about you makes me feel like shit. #anyway the pain will pass and it will be like nothing ever happened im sure #also ive been dreaming about my first girlfriend and it makes me wonder if she dreams about me too #idk last time i saw her she looked so sick. im worried about her but its the weirdest feeling because... theres nothing i can do #we barely know eachother anymore but i still care about her so much #i know thats just the way it is but i sincerely just want her to be happy #i just know that i cant have anything to do with that anymore i guess #or i could because we could still ne friends but shes back in brazil so its a no go #p #this looks like a justgirlythings post oh well. send it #honestly its ridiculous how aforementioned first girlfriend broke up with me on my birthday while i was frankly depressed and alone #in a whole other continent lol #what this person did to me hurt harder. frfr. this whole situation makes me sick to my stomach #and i think they dont even like. think about it. or regret anything. or know i feel this way. and my stupid ass is here #avoiding the though of them at all costs. i just want this to pass and the hurt to be over it like i just have to forget all of it. #anyway its stupid shit. like the situation is not even that deep my feelings were just deeply hurt whatever so dw👍 #ok the person who hurt me the most besides my mom but thats just like. what parents do #they hurt you irreparably without even noticing sometimes and then you just get over it. so im not counting that