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oh-my-may · 22 days

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I'm still alive omg!

Lots of irl things happening atm, BUT I managed to play through Penacony 2.2 (stretched over 3 days, no less)

Woah. Just ... woah. So much happening, so many characters interacting, so much lore, IT WAS GOING ON FOREVER but I loved it nonetheless. Of course they had to make the finale of Penacony long and epic.

FIRST OF ALL I KNEW IT! I TOLD Y'ALL!!! Literally in my post about 2.1 I talked about how Misha definitely has some close connection to Mikhail/the Watchmaker. I suspected him to be a child of his or something but the actual thing was close enough, I guess. My sweet boy. I love him. Mikhail being a Nameless was so cool. I'm really glad we're finally getting more lore and info about Akivili and previous Nameless, but I feel this was only the beginning.

I'm still madly in love with Sunday and Acheron. Robin is such a cutie too. I'm not gonna pull for her because I need my savings for Mr. Boothill and then Jade but I'll try and pull for her on a rerun. Sway to My Beat in Cosmos is such a banger. Caught myself constantly singing "riiise into my wooorld" (ofc much worse than the one and only lol)

On the topic of Boothill... my god. Love him. The way they can't make him swear so they just make him say??? Whatever??? Whose idea was that 💀 mother loving instead of mother fucking?? What the fork?? Wubbaboo?? I would die for this man. He looks so hot too. Again I have to say that HSR never misses with male character design. THEY'RE ALL SO PRETTY.

On the topic of pretty men... SUNDAY. My little radicalized bird man. I cackled when Sparkle called him chicken boy. She's just a hater, love her for that. Serious question... is he straight up dead now? I have only played the main quest so far so in case it'a mentioned somewhere in game don't spoil me but if it's not... tell me will I get to see him as a playable character... pls...

The whole thing with Ena the Order was so interesting to see. The fact that they made Order so similar to Harmony... AEON LORE. Love it. Resurrecting an Aeon is possible, you say? Kind of? The way they make Sunday'a motives understandable... he's just a boy

So I had the feeling that facing the boss Dominicus was a bit too easy the first time around. Wdym he has only one phase. I should have known there was more to it. Nevertheless loved to see IL and Jing Yuan cameo. They slayed (literally)

But then the eerie feeling I got when Black Swan talked to us on the Express... the way she makes us question everything that happened... GENIUS. I did kind of get flashbacks to Sumeru act II. The line between dream and reality, who is dreaming, what happens outside of the dream, the repetition of events... not critiquing or hating, but the concepts were just similar to me and I liked it :) Penacony just put a different twist to it.

The final fight was still very cool. The several toughness bars to break is really interesting, and the fact that you get a shield value the more bars you break. Also the Astral Ecpress literally crashing into Sunday??? I barely realized what I had just watched ghe first time around. Idk why, but the concept is hilarious to me. And the question remains... is Sunday dead now??? What about Robin?? Are they both dead??

Aventurine isn't dead either?? What about the present that Sparkle gave out to several people? What was it and what did it do? Is there smth I don't remember about that rn? Did I miss it? Also if Robin didn't actually die, how come we saw her body? If she just got transported to Dreamflux Reef, then there wouldn't have been a body, right? ALSO is Firefly dead too? She didn't make an appearance throughout the second part after we see her leave and she talked abput the way that the script said she would die 3 times in Penacony... I'm so eternally confused. It's part of the reason I think there's still gonna be more in the next patch... They're not gonna give us playable Firefly without at least a Story Quest for her, right? And Jade, too? She had one appearance in a throwback during the story, the Trailblazer hasn't interacted with her in person yet so the IPC probably hasn't finished their business with Penacony yet?

And since I mentioned Trailblazer... HARMONY MC??? LOOKS SO GOOD? LOVE THE MOVES?? THE HAT? The Significance of it had me 😭😭 my MC obsession ks back y'all. He looks so good. Caelus ily. The silly little dance with Clockie 😭 Can't wait to build him, I heard Harmony MC is really good.

I also briefly have to mention my girl Acheron. So they've literally just casually confirmed that she's Raiden Mai? I actually don't know what Bosenmori means or it's significance BUT RAIDEN MEI. And her whole flashback with Tiernan... I had my suspicions about his identity but the reveal was interesting, anyway. I've got the feeling this is not the last we've seen of Acheron. I never played HI3rd far enough to fully understand Raiden Mei's story, but I'm really intrigued with the whole thing. How come her and Welt exist in noth universes, how did they end up in HSR and what's their motive?

One thing I'm also still hung up on is the Annihilation Gang... no more mention of them? We don't get any real eyplanation as to why Acheron killed Duke Inferno? No little animation of the scene? I'm guessing it's gonna play a role later? The reason they talked about it is probably to tell us that Acheron was dangerous but like... idk what to think of it. No question the other members of the Gang are gonna appear later and maybe then we'll get more background? But if they don't play a large role in Penacony, why introduce them to the players prior to it in such a grand way?

Anyway, I judt have lots of questions still but no doubt the game is gonna answer them when the time is right... I had a really good time playing the quest, went through a whole lot of emotions during it, fell in love with even mlre characters... the new maps are GIGANTIC and look so cool and let me just say rhe music was so so epic too. Can't wait for the OST for this to get released.

I also wanna mention here (outside of discusaions about the story) is that having a fully leveled Acheron with pretty decent relics paired with a tank Aventurine feels like playing the game on easy mode. Nothing can penetrate a fully def stacked Aventurine, and Acheron's damage is straight up insane. Gonna take a while before I get tired of using them. They helped me clear basically all Stage V of every SU World I hadn't done yet... legends.

Now we wait for Boothill... The grip that Hunt characters have on me is unbelievable. Meta wise I know I should invest in Harmony characters... Ruan Mei or Robin but... HAVE YOU SEEN BOOTHILL? HAVE YOU???

Alright, that's it for now. Really excited to dive into exploration and events and quests of the new maps. Might post a little about it.. or maybe not. I still have to tell you about my thoughts on the Arlecchino quest and Remuria exploration, I began a post about that and never got around to finishing it.

As always, have some cool screenshots from the story!

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pinkfestivalpeanuttree · 5 months

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random slay the princess questions i have:

why do we get two new voices in the chapter 3 of the razor route?

why is the razor route the odd one out in so many ways

see previous question

only route with a chapter 4

only route without a chapter 3 that doesn't merge with any other chapter 2 (with the exception of the stranger)

only route that's basically set in stone (as in, the only major variations are whether you take the pristine blade in chapter 2 or not resulting in you either getting the razor or the razor's heart, and the rest of the plot is essentially the same)

one of two routes where you get every voice (and even then the nightmare route isn't set in stone to lead to the moment of clarity like the razor route is)

why is the gray route the only one with a major variation (burning vs drowned) (arguably there's also the networked wild vs the wounded wild, but those you get via your choices. the gray routes are noticably different right from the beginning)

what does the sequence of images in the nightmare -> moment of clarity route represent?

how can the narrator get a drink from wherever he is (presumably some sort of mindscape in the protagonist's head) and what would happen if he got drunk

also, if the protagonist got drunk would the voices get drunk by proxy

what exactly are the qualifications for the shifting mound taking a vessel away

usually for the chapter 2s it's once you and the princess escape the cabin, but the one that stuck out to me was the fury, since it felt really short in comparison to the other chapter 3s... and actually, the shifting mound takes away most of the chapter 3 princesses even if you haven't escaped the cabin

not exactly a question but i find it interesting how the interior of the cabin changes in chapter 2 and the woods change in chapter 3 but we never really see the exterior change with the exception of the moment of clarity and the razor (cheated teleports us to the cabin, so we can't say for sure)

does the razor know what a bird is

are there any parallels between the routes that merge into a chapter 3

for example, you get the fury by basically giving the princess an identity crisis (refusing to fight the adversary/fighting the adversary without the blade resulting in you failing to give her the mutual rivalry she craved, or stripping the tower of her divinity)

check out this post by @/lipstickchainsaw for a better analysis

damsel and prisoner are both, in a way, the damsel in distress trope, with the prisoner route being given a serious dose of cynicism, both sort of having a theme of trust (getting the voice of the skeptic in the prisoner route, both you and the princess needing to put trust in each other to escape the cabin: the prisoner putting her trust in you to figure out what to do with her severed head, the damsel and the smitten's blind trust in each other, and in a way, being distrusting of either of them is what results in the gray routes or the deconstructed damsel)

i got the trust theme from this post by @/honeyfizzly and the damsel in distress similarity from the tags on this reblog

the witch and the beast both get you the wild... catgirls?

fr though after thinking about this post by @/birdmitosis and how opportunist and hunted are both survival-oriented, a noticeable thing about the witch and the beast is that they're arguably the routes where you and the princess are most at odds with each other (mutual backstabbing vs predator and prey dynamic) and yet the wild is where the two of you are the most in sync- literally, you and her are one

nightmare and spectre get you wraith... ghost ladies?

idk about this one guys

help

also not a question but i find it fitting how the ending dialogue changes depending on your very, very first impression of the princess, whether you took the blade or not or if you got the stranger route- something something themes of perception and first impressions something something

is the narrator's world on the verge of an apocalypse or something or is he just a scared little bitch

considering his last words in the mirror i think it could be the former but the latter makes it easier to make fun of him

#slay the princess #stp #epilogue speaks #slay the princess spoilers #stp spoilers

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i-bring-crack · 2 years

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This may be a rant but, if Airplane had progressed with the main storyline of making Bingge and Shen Jiu reconcile, they would have probably been more healthy than expected.

Probably.

Shang Qinghua had thoughts about making the Luo binghe and Shen Qinqiu be in a relationship, whenever or not it meant a romantic one was probably up for debate, cuz I only remember that Airplane wanted to redeem the villain and considering the good amount of bingge and Scum shen that already existed (I'm looking at you Searching For Friends In the Dusty Dessert) then I'm pretty sure it was going to be like a very very good one. But maybe not a full on romantic relationship due to harem wives still being a thing ever since Ning Yingying. So gayness was thrown out the window. (Despite the comments in PDIW telling Airplane how much better he will be writting bl because the relationships between Shidis and Shixiongs had more tension than Bingge and Wives, and we all know how there are many series that give off the same vibes yet don't have a gay character at all. Cough shonen cough.)

So this just my two cents of an interpretation of what was supposed to happen to the main villain. A) Shen Jiu would have likely been slowly reforming his character since the time Binghe lost his pendant, or B) Shen Jiu would have shown his true side during the Water Prison Arc or Jinlan City Arc. Not just revealing his past but also the reasons behind his killings.

Am I doing it right? Binghe would think constsntly as he saw the sharp eyes accumulating their rage when he felt at his weakest in the fight against the demon.

For me, it's most likely A bc with A there would have been hints of the character changing, not much, but just enough to leave some plot holes here and there that could be explored later on.

Shen Jiu could have a reason for finding the stranded pendant in his peak. He could have secretly watched the protagonist from afar get beaten and done nothing. But when it came to his life being in actual danger, he would waste no time saving him, like when they discovered the skinner. And to Luo Binghe, all of this would be confusing. He'd think naively that all the pain he had to endure was justifiable, but slowly, the resentment would start toe at him up.

His Shizun got mad at Ning Yingying because she asked for help, yet relented and let him stay in his carriage. His Shizun would often beat him up time and time again, telling him to learn because he is weak, yet still be training under his own hand every day. [Idk if airplane would have planned for the man to turn over a new leaf instantly, but it did seem a but fishy how we never get a reason as to why Shen Yuan gets transmitted into that exact point in the book, or why the OOC just completely fades after he'd done one mission. The skinner. And this purely already on a og Canon divergence, but if Airplane wanted to do his twist here and still keep it a secret for the readers, he would have given Binghe a teacher, coincidentally, when he had just lost the pendant of his mother.]

Shen qingqiu was ruthless, yet there came once in a blue moon a moment that made him think back as to why he was still here all this time. He wasn't his most favored, yet he was still kept an eye upon. The time he finally beat Ming Fan fair and square, the time he managed to beat several Bai Zhan Peak disciples at once to show off his strength, Shen Qingqiu didn't grow angry at him, yet didn't grow happy at it either. Though he seemed like he saw something behind those eyes behind the fan, his irises cooled and fired up at the same time. What was he thinking? Luo Binghe asked, many others did too. No one knew as turned his sight away the next second.

Are you not disappointed in me now? He would think upon coming back to the peak hoping that one of this days that ruthless Shizun would smile at him for the beast he had slayed.

Am I strong enough for you? He would think upon noticing the birds in the sky looking at his face as he slayed another beast again, taking the number one place.

What is he thinking? Luo Binghe asked one night as the sharp eyes strangled him with that fearful gaze, taking the longest time to look at the mark, then an even longer time to look at him as a person, as Binghe. When he turned away from the cliff, Binghe only wished to be looked back again, to ask.

Is he doing it right?

Is he not a disappointment anymore?

Will he not be hit again?

Is he strong enough in his eyes?

Is he proud of him?

Proud of the demon he raised?

Apparently not.

So Binghe does not try anymore, when he sees Shizun once more, he does not try anymore. He does not want revenge and he does not want his love. But his mind still can't let him go, the curious cat wants to find out what's inside Shen Qingqiu, why has he done everything up until this point? Why did he never smile, why did he always come back to treat him for the minimum things, why did he give him a chance to sleep for a few days under his own home. That same man that never smiled was the same one that shouted him to get up and fight, the same one to slice the demon's head off before he got poisoned, the same one that reprimanded him for not being able to control himself against the kids on the street in his dream, the same one that stood behind him like a silent blanket when he saw his mother die again, the same one that whipped him until he could dodge the whip and grab it in one hand, the same person that would throw him into the abyss, the very same person that would treat his wounds when Yingying wasn't around, the same person that poured tea on him for the very first day and the same person that would ask him that very fated question one night.

"Do you want to become strong?"

"Yes."

"Stronger than anyone in this world?"

"Yes."

"To not get trampled and beaten by others ever again?"

"Yes."

"...Then you must go through hell and back for that."

At that time, he thought he would understand his Shizun if he managed to be a mirror of what that man shows. For years, he yearned and planned to be his equal, to grab the second highest status in the Huan Hua palace, have a harem of women just like Shen Qingqiu has his brothel, have the sect leader obey him just like Shen Qingqiu had Yue Qingyuan by his side, have the past of his roots tainted just like his master— but unlike him, being a demon was enough for mankind to despise him.

Until he finally realized they were nothing alike. Nothing. His emotions became ever so messy with the sight of a surprised Shen Qingqiu standing next to him upon Jinlang, his cold face gone, a new one, a tired one, a pair of eyes that seemed to light up for one second and then dimm the next, calm, terrified, his glossy eyes closed every other emotion, hiding the redt of the face behind his fan as Gongyi Xiao called for him.

Just like him, gods, he was exactly like him. Shen Jiu hated that. What he hated, he would try to kill it as much as he could. Every man that tortured him to the point that he broke, he would kill; Qiu Jianluo, the entire Qiu family, Wu Yanzi, maybe even his Qi-ge in his mind and ...Xiao Jiu. Everyone, everyone from that horrible past, was buried. Nothing that could even remind him of those hellish days would come back.

The ethereal man suddenly began to rot before his eyes. Like a god muddled by the earth, stripped of his divine to show the hidden demon underneath.

Shen Jiu is man that ran and hid, a man of a cold front in front of him while the silently trembling and tense fingers said otherwise, a man that became a horrible killer, then a coward. That same man was a hero, his savior, and the one to lay down his life. That same man was a victim and a scared child. That same man was what he once was a long time ago and chose to give him that same hellfire in order to forge the same cold blade he has become.

But Luo Binghe was still here, the white sheep still craving to know more, and now the black wolf stared back at him, wanting to taste revenge upon his bones. Or something, anything, he wanted to be filled with this deep void in his heart, his body, and soul. Just one look at him would be enough.

They inflicted each other pain, yet never meant to do so? No they both did, just that the outcome was the worse they could get.

Luo Binghe felt a slight trembling hand touch his forehead as they got out of the mausoleum, and he, despite every touch of every woman he could have, would still melt at the softness of each fingers as they tried to not hurt him, not like last time. They were trembling even more when he flinched, when his eyes widened and then rested upon the strands that have never felt Shizun's fingers rub through them in such a thoughtful way.

Shen Qingqiu, for the first time, let his hand be held tighter and tighter by Binghe as the whispers grew and the rumors of Su Xiyan pierced ears, condemning a child for its sole existence, condemning a woman they knew nothing of. He gritted his teeth at the baseless rumors, only able to shout out. "How fucking dare they."

That is, except for one another.

To be just as guilty of those baseless facts as he was a long time ago, That it was all his fault Liu Qingge died when he had actually tried to save him, that it was Luo Binghe’s fault that Su Xiyan died when he had been a baby at that time. Like Disciple like Master they both would truly be alone in this world that never wished to listen to any of their words.

And now, with the longing of his touch that he craves and the wish of never being left alone in this world, both of them don't fear the past anymore.

#ehem #can i get you some comfort bingjiu in these trying times?#luo binghe #luo bingge #shen jiu #shen qingqiu #bingjiu #airplane shooting towards the sky #nope not writting B cuz battery at 2 percent #scum villain spoilers #scum villain's self saving system #scum villain #scumbag system #scumbag self saving system #mxtx svsss

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udretlnea · 1 year

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Fav. Library Event (Headcanons; Piece #1/5)

A/N: "For the creator’s event at the Favonius Library”.

Taglist: @theblueskyofthedawn

Headcanons

Venti

On the anniversary of their victory against Decarabian, he goes to that one tree in Stormterror’s Lair and plays a song he used to sing to his old friend during the past.

After the GAA event with Mona, Fischl, Kazuha, & Xinyan he fell off the roof of the Cat’s Tail and into a bundle of cats; he ended up bedridden in the church for several days.

The most drinks he’s ever consumed in one sitting was 100, and that was during one particularly bountiful Weinlesefest in Mondstadt.

(Ehe~)

Xiao

Created small shrines to the other Yakshas in a secret compartment in his room at the Inn; he regularly gives offerings of items that he thinks they'd like. (Ex: Bonanus- Rice Buns, Indarias- Chili Minced Cornbread Buns, etc.)

After hearing Venti play on the flute once, Xiao went and tried carving one himself to practice with; keyword tried because he has no experience in woodcarving. The result looks terrible, but he keeps it stashed in the aforementioned compartment.

When not suffering from karmic debt or slaying demons, sometimes he observes mortals coming and going in his little bird form, pretending to be nothing more than what he appears.

(I miss the other Yakshas...but their deeds won’t be forgotten anytime soon so that’s nice.)

Nahida

She makes bento for the Wanderer’s lunch, even decorating it with a cute lil’ Aranara made out of a radish.

Whenever Wanderer comes to visit report to Nahida, she takes the time to ask him MomTM questions like, “How was your day?”, “Anything interesting catch your eye?”, “Would you like me to make your favorite?”

You know those Aranara in her character demo? She plays games with them irl whenever her duties take her near Vanarana.

(No thoughts, only Nahida-Mother brainrot)

Heizou

He has his own fanclub; they’re a small but passionate group.

Heizou thought that deep-fried food was mid at first, but after the day he received his Vision his perception of it shifted as a result of the trauma and thus it now tasted delicious.

Despite not looking like it, Heizou is a decent beetle battler; he’s managed to win against Yoimiya, but not Ayato.

(I lowkey like Heizou. People should appreciate him more.)

Kazuha

When Tomo was still alive, Kazuha would pluck a strand of the former’s hair and be able to play music from it as if it were a leaf.

Kazuha used to have nightmares about that day of Tomo’s execution whenever there was stormy weather, but after putting his friend’s vision in front of his grave they aren’t so intense anymore.

On one particularly fair day, Kazuha napped on a rather warm rock until sunset; he was later woken up by an amused Hu Tao who mistook him for a dead body and was in the middle of taking measurements for his coffin. The two sheepishly explained what they were doing to each other and quickly left; the event stuck with Kazuha throughout the present.

(I kind of went off with the last one here; I’m lowkey proud of it)

Tighnari

Tighnari once forgot to pack enough water during a trip to the desert for research and started acting like a clown because of thirst-induced hallucination; Dehya and co. found him before he could hurt himself and helped him recover. Tighnari doesn’t know that Dehya found him like that while the latter thought it was mildly amusing.

After the events of Nahida’s second story quest, the Traveler went to inform Tighnari about Nur and the other mushrooms at Mawtiyima Forest; now he helps tend to the garden there (if you did the quest, you know what I’m talking about).

When Collei still had Eleazar, if he heard anyone badmouth or berate Collei he would personally see to it the offender would be stuck with some embarrassing chore.

(Idk what went through my mind with the first one other than “shenanigans”. It was midnight.)

Albedo

Keeps a pouch of snacks inside his coat; it’s filled with spiders covered in a sweet resin (it sounds gross, but it’s actually quite tasty).

He’s gotten so detailed at sketching that he’s definitely opened commissions at least thrice; practically all citizens of Mondstadt flock to his office to ask for them so he’s had to set up a hard limit of ten commissions.

During the Irodori Festivsl he came across an onikabuto battle and was fascinated enough to go out and try it himself. He sometimes writes essays on the optimal and ideal form to engage in onikabuto fights.

(Can you tell that I loved the Onikabuto event so much I included it in several of these headcanons?)

Xingqiu

On one particularly sunny day, he tried to successfully practice the moves he read in his martial-arts book. He keeps practicing so as to have another option if he were disarmed in combat one day.

Thanks to the above, Shenhe and Xingqiu have developed a minor respect and the former even gives pointers on the off-chance she runs into the middle of his practice.

His hair used to be more professional and traditional, but he insisted on getting it cut to resemble Yelan’s haircut after that one encounter with her (see About Yelan) because he thought she was cool-looking.

(Nothing special on this one. This one’s fine.)

Sucrose

Regularly writes to Collei asking for updates on her teachings and offers to donate her books to Collei; Collie appreciates it, but declines because she’s determined like that.

At first, Sucrose didn’t have time for nor was interested in TCG, but after playing with the Traveler and Fischl she got hooked and now low-key collects cards a la Cyno.

When it’s just her and Albedo working together in general, she feels comfortable and safe enough to let her ears stand up.

(I wonder if Hoyo will have Sucrose and Collei interact again...)

#favoniuslibrary #olive tea #olive tea's gift number 1 out of 5 #yeah you're getting five of this and you can't stop me >:)#I'm like the nicest supervillain you'll ever meet lol

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sanchoyo · 1 year

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arc v 22 - 30 thoughts!!! whew these eps. set up stuff is important. also, good masumi yuzu moments.

-my god. yuya literally accidentally taking yuzus polymerization card from her and making it his thing when she practiced so hard with it. FUCKing apt metaphor for how I feel she should be the protag and shes being robbed of her role (im sorry I genuinely have nothing against yuya but shes so much more interesting to me! she feels like a classic protag!) im glad he gave it back at least…I was afraid she'd refuse it for some reason…

-I do love yuyas random ITS SHOWTIME english. tmm moment. (theres a lot of random english mixed into this series actually and it always makes me like :D!!! lol I understand!!! hehe)

-uhhh the tall fortune teller lady trying to look at yuyas fate fr and the glass ball SHATTERING AND BREAKING IN HALF IS PROBABLY BAD, THOUGH.

-24 gave some veeeery interesting implications. yuto tells yuzu fusion is the 'enemy' and weve SEEN a synchro (guy on motorcycle, so I assume synchro at least) fighting yuto too!! so. oh my god it is all the dimensions vs xyz. WHAT DID XYZ DO. THATS MY FAV CMON!!! -also very um. interesting in the implications of gx and 5ds being on different timelines I think since the implication is theyre pulling from diff dimensions all at once, right? (possibly diff timelines on top of that, since im p sure even tho I havent seen him, that ive heard arc v kaito is Kind of a Different Kaito from Zexal Kaito. whatever that may mean. canon/timeline divergence???? im SO confused LMAO I thought 5ds was a straight shootoff from gx/dm! I know zexal makes things a bit fucky since I think it implied 5ds didnt Happen, but?? before that I assumed it was a straight line...am I wrong tho...(dont actually answer I wanna figure it out on my own..)

-masumi!!!! being a BOSS at dueling and her two lil dudes being SUCH hypemen for her. we love itttt

-idk if theyre setting shun up as a bad guy or whatever or deeply traumatized. but everytime he xyz summons im like yessss king slay (but not my girl masumi!!!) 16400 attack monster!!!!! with an epic fire bird!!! im obsessed w his aesthetics if nothing else. kinda epic hes putting ppl in cards actually to draw reiji out and wants to take him hostage. i think i side with him bc hes at least cool about it. if youre gonna be morally questionable your vibes better fuck severely, and his do.

-yuzu kinda having a hotgirl summer moment by falling in love with an emo version of her bff LOL get it girl!!!

-oh shit LMAO REIJI STRAIGHT UP SAYING 'no my dad doesnt give a shit about me, taking me hostage would not work' with a straight face!!! DUDE U OK. this IS ygo so daddy issues come standard with every character but CHRIST. and shun being like 'wtf do u mean' HE SAID IT OUTRIGHT DUDE. DONT BE DENSE.

-shun getting told by reiji 'i have ONE condition' then WALKING AWAY BEFORE TELLING HIM and shun being like HEY?? dude this guy has been assaulting ppl/trapping them in cards and ur just?? walking away??? reiji has massive balls and is so funny (I know its more intended to be a cliffhanger, but its ygo. the solution is gonna be to do a series of duels, of course)

-junior, jr youth, youth in the tournament, so being like, little kids (I assume like 5-12ish?) then middle schoolers 13-15? then the youth class beng teenagers up to 18? thats my assumption bc 'pros' seems to indicate adults, and pros arent in the tournament. reiji specifies this is a tournament to find 'spears to fight' for him. WHY are you using CHILDREN instead of pros dude??? christ with your resources theres no NEED for that right???

-but hes fighting his dad and claims to be on the same side as shun, which. surprised me ngl. reiji team xyz!!!! win for the gays everywhere!!! and he has daddy issues!!!!!!!!!!! king.

-honestly, it raises the question of who the 'good' guys are in this battle? reijis up to use child soldiers and to work with a guy who is willing to trap ppl in cards. yet yuto made a point to say its bc they lost friends and want to protect ppl. we dont know what the other side is fighting for. it FEELS like both sides are willing to do Whatever Morally Grey things they need to, which is SUPER interesting. I mean, we havent SEEN the other side at length yet! except sora, who it was on SIGHT for when he saw yuto! so I'm willing to bet hes got the same 'whatever it takes' attitude…I want to know WHYYYY theyre fighting!!!)

-theres a duel school where idols go to learn to duel??? THATS SO CUTE. mikiyo naname ilu i know ur gonna show up ONE time but cute design

-no one told yuya hed be doing the lil pre-tournament speech!! yes he might want to be an entertainer but my god anyone would be anxious with like zero prep or warning! tf nico

-one of the announcers says juniors solid vision ar stuff is 'very soft like a sponge' why the hell is all of it not like that?? its fine for anyone over like 13 to get injured dueling ig! lmao!

-omg masumi being like 'tf are u talking abt shun has always been on our team' GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS MOMENT LMAOO (or some level of brainwashing, who knows, it IS yugioh)

-its refreshing to see some good parents in ygo who are involved for once, lol, all the kids parents there to watch them duel and cheer them on is sweet!

-layra is like. Deeply Traumatized and just seeing the councilwomen sends them into a PANIC I need to run into traffic to protect them (the subs call them a boy but?? quick google says girl so for NOW I'm being neutral w pronouns until further confirmation from the show ig) they were up there with reiji earlier too! tf are u making a traumatized child duel for dude! losing favor points with me very quickly reiji. putting ppl into cards is nbd but traumatizing kids? no. gotta draw the line somewhere man

-ayu's deck is aquarium themed!!! my god thats SO cute all the kids have rly cute themes. but she forgot she cant attack on turn one…girlie thats the basics…(everyone was cheering her on for the mistakes and encouraging her which is sweet tho)

-then its extra sad when ayu loses and still has ppl comforting her and being sweet and layra having NO ONE ???? EXCEPT REIJI WHO JUST OFFERS (1) HEADPAT. also 'niisama' yeah I expected as much, ygo rival Standard. give ur sib a HUG or something. (maybe theyre touch adverse, I dont know. they do seem. Deeply Traumatized sjfkjnkh)

-lmaooo sora and yuzus friendship Continues to grow on me. his pic of her in his contacts is her smacking yuya with her fan! and she calls him to be like 'YOU BETTER COME ROOT FOR ME OR ELSE' i love how she combats his very wishy washy noncommittal attitude…he says its bc hes her teacher but cmon u guys are friends, prob more than anyone shes soras friend fr by now right?

-YESSS YUZU MASUMI DUEL theyre both doing great I LOVE their dynamic in my mind THIS is what a ygo protag and rival should feel like (sorry to reiji, but he just doesnt feel rival-y enough yet to me!! cannot even explain it) the gay instinct to have a rival. the whole 'im better than you' attitude, the fiery competitiveness…wanting to prove them wrong, the thinking abt them so much u can predict their moves..its SO spicy. then the giving of the red rose card after getting saved by yuzu…masumi? are u perhaps. fellow gay?

-despite all of my efforts sora is growing on me. hes SUCH a brat and is honest about it (and doesnt rly do the whole fake cutesty thing as much as Id expected he would) I think hes actually been as honest as he can, maybe? like I assume theres a good reason he hasnt told the others hes..involved in some kind of?? inter-dimensional battle?? situation??? Im not entirely sure I think hes gonna be a full out traitor or anything, but the others will prob be upset when they find out he's been withholding info…but I 100% think hes some kind of child soldier who BELIEVES his side is right, just like im sure shun feels real justified sealing ppl into cards! (and unlike shun we havent SEEN sora DO anything bad yet. I just kinda think he HAS based on his deck being so creepycute and him not being straightforward, but again, him continuously asking if he was even allowed to be teachign yuzu stuff makes me think hes taking orders from..someone...) him so mad shun didnt stick around to see yuzu's duel was so funny. I dont WANT him and yuzu's silly lil friendship to end! im attached now! even tho I KNOWWW hes sus! :(

-in the crowd you can see ppl wearing cute duel monster accessories, like one girl had a dark magician girl headband/visor thing! very cute, wish we saw more things like that. in pokemon anime they do that a lot and its always such a delight…I want more duel monster cosplay moments! or references in charas outfits!

-ok yuya being the damsel during gongenzakas duel while yuzu is the one yelling, telling gon not to worry is……furthering my idea that yuzu is main chara and yuya is in the position of side character of different gender than main character (who is often a damsel or person to worry over the most). hes the anzu/kotori of the show. to me. JKJSDH (also, gongenzaka, is perfectly nice and fine but its so hard for me to care deeply about him aaaahg even with the episodes centered around him…hes so straightforward and steady, tho. good for him.)

-….the guy who gongenzaka's dueling should be disqualified. he had his goons try and jump yuya! god why isnt he automatically disqualified! doesnt the broadcast pick up audio?? he like, admits to it!

-....is shingo supposed to be yuya's rival actually, instead of reiji? ...he doesnt feel like a rival either though!!! or if he is it feels one-sided!!! yuzu was more ready to fight him than yuya was!!! jkahjkf anyway that duel is up next episode which I wont start tonight...but I'm excited to see more shingo. bc I think despite his best attempts at being a threat hes super silly actually...

#arc v #sanchoyorambles #im SURE these are probably unpopular opinions when it comes to the yuzu yuya stuff btw jksdfhk and thats ok #maybe my opinion will change! 30 eps into a ygo series is still pretty early into it!#i think this series has around 150?#so yeah not even halfway in!#btw should i have like a liveblogging tag...for arc v specifically??#so it doesnt get lost in my general arc v tag...#hmm...#how about #sanchoyo liveblogs arc v #there we go :)

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sungbeam · 2 years

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xnonie present to wish YOU 🫵😳 a happy birthday! even tho it's only been a few days, i really enjoyed talking marvel with u 🫶🫶

THOSE ARE AWESOME POWERS! i almost completely forgot about pym tech (sad, i admit) but yeah the entire concept of it is so cool. i'm so in love with paul rudd & scott lang in general its not funny </3 I AM A WANDA DEFENDER UNTIL THE END!! so what if she was scary in multiverse?? she was pretty while doing it 😍 if they could just make her happy for once that would be nice 😭😭

RED DAGGER BEST MS. MARVEL LOVE INTEREST!!! yeah ur right the other guys can leave SLDHDJS kareem radiates so much love interest energy & the tension between him & kamala?? exquisite 💗💗💗 i also ended up finding fics for him on tumblr (there are a handful, btw)

I DID WATCH MOON KNIGHT!! oscar isaac was phenomenal for giving us steven grant, marc spector, AND jake lockley all in one mini series. IT NEEDS A S2. during the airing of the show, i may or may not have stumbled upon khonshu thirst edits on tiktok?? THAT WAS SOMETHING. IDK IF I WANNA RELIVE THAT. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO... COME ON GUYS, ITS A BIRD SKELETON 😭😭

OMG BEAM. U GAVE ME THE GREATEST GIFT OF ALL TIME ?!?!? IT SHOULD BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND, ESPECIALLY ON YOUR SPECIAL DAY ☹️ u shouldn't have!! i'm SO excited. DINO AS QUICKSILVER?!?! SIGN ME UP. I LOVE OUR TIGER KING HOSHI AS WOLVERINE IT FITS SM SHDKSJD (why can i imagine yelling "HORANGHAEEE" while pouncing on someone w/ his claws out? LMAO) and wow... HAO AS MAGIK?? AND GYU AS COLOSSUS?? idk if i can take it anymore 🙏

i made something for wol-ranghae when i saw that hoshi = wolverine but then realized that anon asks can't send pictures 😭😭 maybe when the fic is up, i'll reveal myself just to send u what i made 🫣

AHHH THANK U XNONIE !!! lmaoo why does that finger point emoji look so accusatory 😭😭😭 BUT YES ME TOO I'VE LOVED TALKING ALL THINGS MARVEL W YOU 🥺🥺

pym tech is so cool and so is paul rudd too TRUE (ﾉ´∀｀*) he's so underrated i just sighs,,, give him an oscar guys and call it a day ._. bUT YEAH SAME !! WANDA DEFENDER FOREVER like yeah u bring in an EXCELLENT POINT XNONIE !! just let the woman be happy?? Õ_Ó is that too much to ask ?? all she does is suffer.

BAHHAHAHA I can already imagine the amount of updated masterlists to mcu fanfic accts after the mcu Disney+ shows (ﾉ´∀｀*) that's so slay tbh like we got red dagger, moon knight, druig, and NOW DAREDEVIL !! okay he's deffo not NEW but the thirst has reawakened for most, but in my case, it has been discovered 😳😳 WAIT FR JAKE LOCKLEY EXCUSE ME BUT IF I DONT GET A SZN 2 I WILL RIOT !!!! WAIT THERE R W H A T EDITS ??!? y'all,,, khonshu huh 💀💀 i mean, i really am not allowed to judge, but ... okay. u do u ig :/ HE IS A BIRD SKELETON PLS YALL 😭😭😭

NAUUUR SEEING UR REACTION IS A GIFT ENOUGH FOR ME :(( U BEING EXCITED MAKES ME EXCITED BFF !!! YESSS OMG THATS KINDA WHY I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY HOW I PAIRED TJE MAKNAES BAHAHAH like i gave verkwan arguably some of the most powerful mutants in the verse, and now we can clown chan as a mutant as well (^_-)-☆ /j dkdndkjf im kidding lol i have a severe attachment to quicksilver, but chan just fits the mold whoops and TOO MANY PEOPLE SLEEP ON QUICKSILVER !!! YES OMG YELLING HORANGHAE IN ATTACK MODE HAHAHAH that's so hoshi plss 💀💀💀 i was like,,, who's the most furry-esque mutant? wolverine 😃😃 and i figured we could easily fit hosh w that since he too wishes to be a furry w claws called a tiger or something 🤡🤡 YEP HAO AS MAGIK AND MINGYU AS COLOSSUS!! i thought that fit pretty well :0 tbh one of the hardest people to pair was hao!! i knew i had to find someone who could be as slayfully cool as him

OMG U MADE SOMETHING FOR WOLRANGHAE AHAHAHAH I WISH I COULD SEE IT 👀👀👀 but yuhh when i finally get round to writing and posting this thing do send it in (^_-)-��

#sungbeam strikes again #xnonie 💥

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botwstoriesandsuch · 4 years

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I recently read Shades of blue after you rwcommended it and Oh My God was it worth it. That was beautiful and amazing and do you have any other recommendations?

✨MISSIONS ACCOMPLISHED✨

AAAAAA I’m so glad you read it!!! Honestly I’ve been waiting for someone to ask me for recs for awhile because I have.........a few...

Miscellaneous ships here, not just Revalink but the first lot are

- Pinesong by @a-perplexing-puzzle D-Do I even need to explain myself more??? I talk about this fic every other day of the week..... it’s just great vibes....soft and fluffy and angsty just *chef’s kiss* two gay boys searching through their old memories to remember how gay they are

- Shades of Blue by @unapologetically-asexual OK I know original anon just said they read this but for you idiots that haven’t read it yet....uhhhh get on that. Nothing I could say would really advertise this fic better than this post

- somebody’s always looking (nothing’s quite as sweet) by @kouzaires One of my FAV Coffee shop AU’s for botw....so sof......so tender...........so warrmmmmm.............they characters are written so well.....just love it...a lot

- Broken Spirits by @legendoftoad It’s just AAAAAAAAAA??!!? My boys are hurting and the malice for half of it is frickin doing things to my boy and then of course you got your PTSD themes meddled in there and hnnnnnnnnnnhhhhhghgh my hurt/comfort itch is sufficiently scratched go read

- Linger On by ICanFlyHigher [idk if they have a tumblr] Ok I actually haven’t finished this fic yet but it’s been recommended time and time again so I’ve been reading this in my spare time I’m on like Chapter 12 or 13 I think but I can say with CERTAINTY that the writing is fantastic and tender moments are off the charts and my boys are so precious and also the Yiga are actually cool in this so that’s nice

- Learning Flight by homewardbound This is just *chefs kiss* *standing ovation* *throws confetti in the air* quality quality Revalink. Just a delicious chocolate cake of botw and Revalink. You got your mysterious Revali waking up 105 years later batter, and your angsty PTSD gay boys duo chocolate chips, and then you can chuck in some engaging sideplot elements as a few tall tiers, and then the cake is all whipped up with the wooden spoon of subtextual writing just mmmm delicious. and ALSO I betaed a thing that is gonna happen and let me tell you shit is gonna happen like VERY IMPORTANT SUPER COOL plot twists be happening so you better read it

- Conversations After The End Of The World by @bismuthllie Ok this one’s a oneshot but I always go back and read it because...idk it just strums my heart strings a lot...I’ve said Pinesong was my first big Revalink fic I’ce read, but this was like...my first, first piece of Revalink content I read ever so...yeah <3 ....and also the art for this comic is fantastic too even thought it gives me the emotions......hahaha ok Revali it’s time to stop being dead

- I See You Swimming In The Sky by @unavoidablekoishi OK OK I know my logic isn’t the best considering it’s the only Revali/Mipha fic I’ve read, but god dammit it’s the best Revpha fic I’ve ever read I still need to catch up cause I’m like 3 chapters behind but this fic CONVERTED me ok, miphvali went from a “huh yeah the art is nice I can kinda see it” to “THAT FISH IS SIMPING FOR THE BIRD 24/7 AND THEY DESERVE EACH OTHER″ This is some *claps* GOOD. SHIT. Ok? *slaps roof of fic* This bad boy can fit so much charming characterization and interaction (and also has made me scream both happily and not happily on several occasions)

- Guardian of The Wilds by @no-themes-just-memes in which I constantly miscall it “Guardian of the Wild” because I’m stupid This isn’t so much a ship fic but it’s so cool Link is a spirit, Urbosa and Zelda’s mom are a thing, Zelda is HERE and she is AMAZING like no spoilers but holy shit Zelda is here and slaying in more ways than one and riding Satori and hhnnnnhhhhhhhh it’s all about those ~plot twists~ and tone changes ya know? very very very nice...

- Firebird by @paellaplease Oh no, it’s Kip’s obligatory Firebird gush whoopsie poopsie who would have guessed surely not me. This is just my standard for Oc ship content now it’s so good I am gay for one fire girl Maiya is my spirit animal and I just wanna cup her in my hands softly even though I know she would probably burn me for it but it would totally be worth it. The writing is just superb and I am also gay for great imagery and action which this is chalk full of so go read it

Ok it’s actually 2am right now and I still need to finish a bunch of AP work so I’m just gonna speed run the rest of these recs

@echogekkos writes such cute and soft Miphlink fics that are on my top tier list like this one and oh crap this post made me realize Healing Touch updated crap there are so many things I need to read and catch up on anyways want more miphlink angst? BOOM read the inspiration for eternity by Merakkli and oh what’s that? You want deep lore that was custom made with lots of hot ocs in a fic that spans way beyond BOTW welp here’s Hyrule Bound a universe entirely created by @themisadventurescrew which is yet another fic series that I am behind on crap but oh shit @kittmoon has started a chapter fic called Jaded Seas recently so you should go read that but also all of their oneshots are great as well so you should follow them and did I mention that everyone I’ve tagged are people you should follow because yeah anyhow here’s a crackfic about Goron children that had me shaking out of either fear or confusion for a few days by @angsttronaut ok moving on @thatsnotzelda writes beautifully just take a look at this angsty Revalink thing and also bambambambam you’ve been ambushed by @hatenostorms @going-fancognito @ashrel @lizards-writing-blog so now go request some from them because I said so they’re great also uhhh @idiotic-canadian and @moonchildrenn [Pins_and_Patches on ao3] hate happiness but that’s ok because I get to be emotionally wrecked by their angst and whump hurray! wait fUCK I completely forgot to rec this earlier but my first Zelpha fic was this gorgeous Coffeeshop AU by @theseventhsage called Dreaming of Coffee and Love so go read that *flipping through entire history of ao3* let’s see let’s see... All of the Rito Chronicles by sturms_sun_shattered is great, and this Teba/Harth one is also a fav and oh CRAP my zelink content is just everything by @fatefulfaerie because it’s just *throws colorful streamers in the air* pretty and I love their writing welp I’m about to collapse lets just end it off with the z’s like @zzariyo and @zeawesomebirdie on ao3 they are some pretty radical french fries if i do say so myself and and ok ok read this other Zelpha coffee au which is also by @kouzaires and this Modern au also by @unavoidablekoishi ok that’s all I can remember right now bye

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joulethieves · 6 years

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deep breath remember when i said this would take me 5mins nevermind i wrote for an hour

tl;dr burmecian dragoon frately and his adopted hume daughter kipcha are hunters that speak several languages but speak french to each other. there’s a dog and a falcon involved that are kipcha’s weird pets. burmecians are an extinct race aside from frately after they defended marginalized groups across ivalice and slowly died off. kipcha and reddas probably have a Thing. kipcha yells at al-cid in rozarrian bc he owes her money cuz she was hired to spy with her multilingual skills before getting thrown into prison and recently broken out by the time the xii-timeline is close to an end , pre-pharos.

ok wheremst do i start with these two i’ll try to. keep it short.

SPOILER I DIDNT KEEP IT SHORT

kipcha is a hume in her late 20′s who is a huntress. she has a dog and a falcon has a pet. she lives in the mountains, i headcanon somewhere in rozarria, with her weird dad frately.

frately is , quite frankly, a ripoff of sir frately from ffix. like basically he is a burmecian. but in ivalice-verse, i headcanon burmecias/cleyrans as an extinct race. long long lonnnng ago, burmecians used to be protectors of sorts, of the downtrodden or endangered. they are dragoons so they slayed a lotta dragons threatening their land and the land of others. they were all around a super amazing good race of creatures. the viera, especially, consider themselves heavily indebted to them. many many years ago the burmecians defended eruyt from an attack from some force (i havent figured it out yet, either humes or wyrms) and thus helped build the barriers in golmore now.

so in ffxii timeline, when fran sees frately, and frankly--when any viera sees frately, the only burmecian they’ve seen in many many many years (as they were rumored to be wiped out in some war)--she removes her helmet and bows her head in respect. bc even though the viera that he sees have left the wood, they still owe their lives to burmecians and there’s a deep respect for them as well as a quiet shock as to how he is alive. not sure if he’s the only burmecian who survived; i imagine there are others but perhaps he is looking for them

somewhere in the timeline after eruyt was defended long long ago, another attack on a village happened, a hume town in rozarria. savages were tearing through it, raping and pillaging and burning it to the ground. burmecians fought to eliminate the threat and save the people, but many were slain in their efforts. THE BURMECIANS WERE VERY BUSY FULL-TIME DEFENDERS OF ALL. they never slept. there was always shit to save. kipcha was a toddler at the time and her whole family was murdered, and frately saved her before hiding them both in the woods. maybe just about every burmecian was wiped out (idfk i really dont have it worked out in a timeline). basically, frately adopted kipcha, at a very young age. she was probably like 3. after that attack, they were both alone. he decided he’d take care of her.

fast forward and now kipcha is 20something and she hunts around ivalice with her weird dad. they have a giant big-ass cabin they both built on some lonely mountain and she doesnt get to talk to humans much. but she has her birb and her doggo and likes to kill shit with her dad.

also frately speaks in a heavy french accent because i said so, and bc i headcanon burmecians as generally speaking french, also bc i created him as an OC in high school when i was learning french, also bc i do what i want and french is a language in ivalice altho it probably isnt called french it just sounds french. basically its a dead language its probably what the burmecians spoke.

anyway they speak that to each other. she taught herself the main ivalician tongue and bugged him to learn it too. she doesnt speak with an accent but he’s lazy and old so he has a heavy one. also she speaks rozarrian and landisian and galtaean (what i headcanon as english i guess. she learned a lot of languages by books and travel and when she does meet other humes she loves to talk to them to test out her skills. she is very clever like that. languages come easily to her.

hmmm so anyway

reddas took over balfonheim 2 years pre-game. and there was an assassination attempt to get rid of him as he tried to make all these changes in balfonheim since he cleaned a lot of it up. well, there was an attempt at an attempt for murder, at least.

y’see, kipcha and frately were in balfonheim on a hunt and it was their first visit there. kipcha overheard two men talking in a foreign language no one could speak while in a bar, and understood they were trying to plot against reddas. she didnt know who reddas was but she’s literally so catty and didnt like how they looked at her so she snitched. basically she saved reddas’ life cuz it ended up being a huge plot to kill him.

from then on kipcha got on reddas’ good side but was labeled a snitch by others. she doesn’t really care tho, but sometimes it grates her. lots of people call frately a rat bc of how he looks as a burmecian, and because of him partnering with kipcha to snitch, but i dont think the namecallers understand how tall he is cuz when he stands up from his barstool he is literally like almost seven feet tall he is so tall dude.

kipcha is average like 5′6″ or something but frately is gigantic. he used to give her piggyback rides and jump around when she was a kid and she squealed in delight but he calls her too fat now (she isnt, but he teases her). kipcha is very sassy, outgoing, and mislabeled as “confident” when really she has no concept of how to act in public since she is never around people so she’s generally just a loud weirdo. she carries her dog around in her arms and ppl are like “omg is ur dog ok” and shes like “he’s fine i just like carrying him around like a baby” . she has a bird, a falcon named [redacted (im honestly so embarrassed by a lot of this)], she flies around sometimes and brings kipcha things like dead rats and random rings. kip has a bohemian sort of style about her and wears a bunch of shit the bird finds.

because kipcha can speak a lot of languages she was then hired by al-cid to do some spying for something or other, shortly after the reddas stint, as word got out about her. she did the job, and got the info back to al-cid, but she got caught and imprisoned. frately broke her out but it took over a year to figure it out. i also headcanon that the bird steals al-cid’s glasses in xii timeline during his brief stint in balfonheim.

kipcha and frately are coined “fire ‘n ice” by most folks who are fond of them. kipcha is very hotheaded and loud. she is also a redhead. frately being of pallor skin and white hair and quiet temperament is therefore ice. whenever frately is embarrassed by her she likes to remind him he raised her and he likes to respond “i had nothing to do with this” in a very french accent.

so reddas hasn’t seen her for over a year and a half before she shows up in the xii-timeline, broken out of prison, growing her hair out cuz they buzzed it off, and demanding money from al-cid bc he never paid her, but in his defense she was in prison.

kip and frate show up late in-game and that’s the first time reddas sees her since she saved him, essentially i. sort of maybe ship her with reddas? but more like a “they totally banged once and she’s obviously nuts about him and clambers on his back and curls his sideburns around her finger while whispering in french in his ear” she’s honestly hilarious and frately facepalms a lot. frately and fran hang out. kipcha goes on a hunt with vaan and penelo and they becomes bff’s. hmmm. yeah anyway they show up late in-game to help with a hunt or an esper or like, they need kipcha and frately’s translating knowledge for something or other. idk kipcha is just happy to be out of prison and eating oysters and petting her dog. by the time she shows up in balfonheim ingame she’s probably been out of prison for a few months. oh no this got so long im sorry i think abt them every day they live in my head

#oc's #oh no #oc more like oh crap #kipcha #frately

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easyobsession · 7 years

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DWTS24 Cast Announcement and why Simone Biles won’t win.

Do you feel it? The anticipation, the desire, the lust for shirtless foreign men mixed with the scent of sweat dripping on hardwood?

YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT YOU DO. BECAUSE IT’S TIME FOR ANOTHER SEASON OF OUR FAVORITE SHOW WE LOVE TO RIP APART SINCE THIS IS OUR VERSION OF THE GODDAMN NFL.

IT’S TIME FOR MY RECAP OF THE DWTS SEASON 24 CAST ANNOUNCEMENT. BASK IN MY DISPLAY OF EXCITEMENT VIA CAPS LOCK. HERE WE GO, KIDS.

The Guys

BONNOR BOLTON with pro partner SHARNA BURGESS:

To start us off, like a large portion of the cast this season, especially the males, I have no clue who this person is. Apparently he’s a bull rider and model? Because those two things are commonly associated with each other… Anyway, he looks 12 but apparently is almost thirty. Now, if you remember back to season 8, rodeo cowboy Ty Murray (ex-hubbie of singer Jewel, though they were still married at the time) managed to get to fourth place with Chelsie Hightower. Now I won’t take anything away from Ty, but the competition wasn’t incredibly stiff that year outside of the top 3. That being said, it is possible this Bonnor guy (raise your hand if you’ve ever heard that name before. Me either) could turn out to be the next James Hinchcliffe and shock us all (shoutout to James. We love and adore and miss the hell out of you and Shar. #GetMarried). But I doubt it. My expectations are low. Moving on.

RASHAD JENNINGS with pro partner EMMA SLATER:

Please welcome the latest inductee into the Pro Athletes I’ve Never Heard Of Because They Are In Fact Athletes Club! His bio says he’s a running back in the NFL. Wasn’t Tim Riggins a running back on Friday Night Lights? GO RIGGINS! (Shoutout to everyone in Dillon, Texas. #TexasForever) …That’s it for my football knowledge. But congrats to Emma for getting a partner that isn’t old enough to be her grandfather and is actually in good physical shape. He won’t win, but he sure as hell won’t be as bad as her usual partners. Yahoo!

CHRIS KATTAN with pro partner WITNEY CARSON:

I’m never upset to see Witters. I missed her on the tour. This guy’s turn on SNL was before my time, so I’m 0/3 thus far. I’m gonna make a guess based on physique and just first glance (because I wouldn’t be the Lo you all love if I wasn’t a judgmental asshole) and say he’s gonna suck and be out early. Sorry Wit. Enjoy your time with the troupe.

DAVID ROSS with pro partner LINDSAY ARNOLD:

Again, I’m always happy to see Lindsay. We’re up to 0/5 for my recognition of the males of season 24, and we have our second inductee into the season 24 IDK Athletes Club. My knowledge of baseball is limited to the new FOX show Pitch (watch it. Fall in love with it. Obsess with me and my friendys in the #bawson tag. And yes, that is Mark Paul Gosselaar from Saved By The Bell. Zack Morris is a sexy motherfucker with that beard. #ShamelessPlug) but he seems like a nice guy. Horray for the MLB finally getting someone on the show. Or really, I’m sorry to the MLB for finally getting someone on the show. Moving forward.

MR. T with pro partner KYM HERJAVEC:

I KNOW THIS ONE! YOU GUYS, I KNOW WHO THIS ONE IS. And Kym is using her married name! (BTW, sidenote, I’ve started watching SharkTank and now adore Robert. Just sharing #Sharkaroo) Anyway, I think we all know how this is going to turn out. Lord help us. And I’m already sick of hearing that catchphrase.

NICK VIALL with pro partner PETA MURGATROYD:

Sigh. Yes, I know this one too. First of all, let me say welcome back Peta. We’ve missed you and couldn’t be happier to see you back on our screens. However, I’d rather see her with damn near anyone else but this guy. Am I watching this season of the Bachelor? Hell no, and Nick is the reason why. I didn’t watch his seasons of The Bachelorette- I actually have only seen a handful of seasons, but I’m aware of what’s gone on. And I’m opposed to him being the Bachelor for two reasons: #1. It should’ve been Luke. And #2. He’s a dick. Go ahead and try to convince me otherwise. I’m waiting. He won’t be great, and hopefully he won’t be around long. Sorry Nick, yet again you’ll be sent home with only your hand to console you. BUH-BYE NOW.

The Girls

SIMONE BILES with pro partner SASHA FARBER:

Another sigh. Am I excited she’s on the cast? Yes. Will she do well? Pointless to even answer. Am I excited to see the routines she does and how epic her partnership with Sasha will be? Of course. But I’m 95% sure she won’t win and here’s why: it’s also why I’m upset she’s on this season: they can’t and won’t have two identical winners directly next to each other. Simone isn’t even just a gymnast like Laurie, she was literally on the same team and is damn near a carbon copy. Is that a bad thing in life? Hell no. She’s tiny, adorable, and too precious for planet Earth. Make no mistake, I’m in love with the girl. But Simone winning would be almost an exact repeat of last season, which I do not think TPTB (sorry, I mean “the public voters” O.O) will allow. This is why when directly after the Olympics Simone said she couldn’t do the fall season of the show because of other commitments but would love to do the spring season, I was concerned when they announced Laurie. It’s like when Riker Lynch competed and his sister Rydel (shoutout to R5 for being fucking rockstars. Also, #TeamRallison you are missed) said she’s wanted to do the show for a long time, I said even if her schedule worked out it would have to be several seasons before she competed because having siblings back to back is too similar. So really it’s unfair to Simone and unfair to Sasha as well that she’s competing this season, because it’s an almost guarantee she won’t win despite the fact that we know she’ll be one of the best on the floor. Will she make it to the finale? Of course. But I sincerely doubt she has a real shot at getting the mirrorball.

CHARO with pro partner KEO MOTSEPE:

Okay. I get it. With a lot of the male vets being gone, it makes sense that Keo would get another shot as a pro. Plus, in this scenario whether or not he’s a great teacher doesn’t really matter. Do I know who this woman is? Yes. And…I don’t think I need or want to say much more. Godspeed.

ERIKA JAYNE with pro partner GLEB SAVCHENKO:

The Housewives is actually one of the few reality shows I don’t watch, primarily because I simply don’t have the time. So I have no clue who this woman is. I have a feeling she’ll be similar to Kim Zolciak, who I also did not know during her run in season 21 but quickly fell in love with and still follow on social media to this day. So who knows? I’m open to it and wish her well.

NANCY KERRIGAN with pro partner ARTEM CHIGVINTSEV:

Nope. Don’t know her either. But I remember when poor Dorothy Hamill, another former Olympic skater, back in season 16 was tragically forced to drop out of the competition in week 2 due to injury. Dorothy’s first performance was epic though, and she and Nancy seem somewhat similar in build, so… perhaps this could work well. If nothing else, we know the Olympians know how to train. Again, I wish her luck. Let’s see how this goes.

NORMANI KORDEI with pro partner VAL CHMERKOVSKIY:

I will be honest: of all the members of Fifth Harmony, Normani is not my favorite. She’s actually 4/5 for me, and yes, I still count Camilla. But I’m open to new things. She seems cool. And just because she isn’t my favorite member of Fifth Harmony doesn’t mean I don’t like her, she’s just not my fave. I’m excited to get to know and love her. I think she’ll be great. I look forward to seeing her partnership with Val. I’m good with this.

HEATHER MORRIS with pro partner MAKSIM CHMERKOVSKIY:

OH MY HELL KIDS, HERE WE GODDAMN GO. “Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?” “Whenever I pray, I fall asleep.” “Mr. Schue, is he your son?” “When I pulled my hamstring I went to a misogynist.” “It’s a male duck.” “I’m pretty sure my cat’s been reading my diary.” “She’s the one they made me talk to when they found out I was keeping that bird in my locker.” IT’S BRITTANY MOTHERFUCKING S. PIERCE. Yes she toured as a dancer with Beyoncѐ. Yes she knows how to not just dance, but slay. Is it fair? Probably not. Do I care? Find my fucks, I dare you. This is my girl, this is my pick, this is it. The end. I’m sorry Simone, honestly I am and I wish to hell you weren’t in such a shitty position, but this is my One. Mic drop. I’m done.

The Troupe and Missing Pros

Again, sorry to see Mark absent, but he’s moved on and seems happy so good for him. I’ll miss Allison like hell and wish both her and Jenna well in whatever they’re doing next and hope to see them return at some point. Meanwhile, I’m popping bottles and toasting because #MANTISLESS24. Make it trend! Watch me work! PS- welcome to the newbies in the troupe. Mama’s spikin’ her Dr. Pepper tonight. YES INDEED!

Predictions

EARLY EXIT/THANKS BUT NO THANKS: Charo, Chris, Mr. T, and possibly Bonnor (he could go middle and surprise us).

MIDDLE OF THE ROAD/AT LEAST YOU TRIED: Nick, possibly David, Nancy, Rashad, possibly Erika (she could go lower. We’ll see if she’s more Nene or Kim).

GOING ALL THE WAY/LOVE ON TOP OF THE LEADERBOARD: Normani, Simone, Heather. Final 3, I’m calling it now. Unless they end up shocking us and letting Simone have it, I’m gonna predict Heather takes the mirrorball, Simone gets second, and Normani lands bronze. I know Amber Riley won back in season 17 and Heather winning would be the second Glee star to win, but I don’t think that matters as much as two Olympians from the same team winning back to back. That’s my prediction as of now.

I’ll be on vacation in DISNEY WORLD (yessir, let’s go Mickey) for the premiere but I will of course check out the routines online that night. I’m coming home Tuesday so within the next day or so I’ll watch the whole show and either write up something for this blog or toss out some tweets. Keep an eye out.

And that’s it! Season 24, it’s on. I thought for quite a while over the break that last season was season 24, so there you go. Big shock, I have no idea what’s going on. What else is new?

Feel free to join the discussion and hit me up on social media which has changed since last season- I am now @lauthom93 on Twitter and Instagram. You can also comment on this post, check out my ask box, or send me a message. I’m always down to talk. :)

You all know what time it is. Say it with me:

Until next time, love, hugs, and inappropriate gestures. <3

I love you guys to all the moons and back.

-LO.

#DWTS #dancing with the stars #valdaya #opinion piece #lo talks #dwts24 #lo recaps things

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