#im so over it. but theres nothing i can do. i wish i could just not think abt it 24/7 tho

[silenthillbunni]

🍽️😔🎻

#soo blah blah need to vent again abt my health issue situation 💀 #yuh so like im so sick nd tired of whats going on. nd not being able to just eat whatever i feel like whenever #it's emotionall draining tbh. im always thinking abt what i could maybe try nd im always like ohh gotta make sure the portion is small etc #it's annoying me sm bc i can def feel the effects of me not getting the right nd enough nutrients nd vitamins etc etc #i get dizzy nd my vision is hazy sometimes. nd im like forgetful bc the other the when i walked home i kept getting lost nd had to walk back #nd forth several times nd i was like ?!?!? what?! i've lived here for 25yrs nd now i just cannot for the life of me rmbr the way #also i am so weak in my body. like carrying even a small amound or books nd groceries nd walking for 30min makes me exhausted #my legs are actually shaking when i get back home nd every step feels like im walking in cement #plus i just wanna be able to go to the gym nd build muscle. but if i dont get enough protein in me i cant build muscles T-T #what else... yeah also i do miss food bc of comfort. like my coffee + chcolate everyday makes me genuinely happy lmao #but i just want the food situation to be normal bc even w veggies im like oh no that is too gas building that is too hard to digest etc etc #it's mentally gruelling to not know how tf to get all the important nutrients!! i def have several deficiences lmao :(( #im so over it. but theres nothing i can do. i wish i could just not think abt it 24/7 tho #also. im the thinnest i've ever been BUT. i am constantly bloated so i look fkn pregnant. so i cant even enjoy looking the skinnier

[toastsnaffler]

everyone say thank u to my roommate for going to visit her parents this weekend so I can jack it loud and nasty 🙏

#i love her but there are some benefits to having the flat to myself.... love getting to wander around in just my boxers + a tshirt too #things i could do while she was still here if i wasnt a pussy 🙄 #jk itd just make her uncomfortable and im too respectful for that #having a lowkey crush on her is an endless comedy to me bc we would be so woefully incompatible romantically #and also sexually.. historically ive only ever stone topped bc ive never been comfortable enough w anyone to let them fuck me #despite very much Not being stone or exclusively a top. and i think shes some form of sex repulsed anyway so like. sits there dead silence #and also shes so in love with her other friends and i showed up late to that party.... ive been feeling kinda guilty lately bc ik- #she misses them a lot and wishes we'd be able to stay roommates w them too. and im a pretty poor replacement for them tbh #and i love spending time with her but whenever i do i feel kinda painfully aware im not them like i could never fill that space #and asking to hang out more with her always feels like im taking away from time she could be talking to them. or even being alone ik she- #likes her own company and i get that a lot too so its chill but ahh.. man #i dont mean this in a bitter or jealous way at all like theyre all such sweet ppl i couldnt ever hold it against them #theyre kind of a 3 headed cerberus type situation and im like. the stray puppy they found on the side of the road #theres nothing they can do differently i was just born to be alienated from other ppl forever until i die. and someday i hope ill- #finally get used to it and accept i wont ever feel like im enough for anyone else or feel like anything else is enough for me #old wounds healed over 5082 times that still hurt to touch but i cant help pressing my fingers into them anyway bc its a familiar pain etc #anyway lost where i was going with this its just been on my mind again recently. i hate to be pitied i hate to feel like im only included- #bc they didnt want me to feel left out i hate feeling like a shoddy secondhand stand-in and its been a lot of that lately #also been a little annoyed bc sometimes it feels like shes trying to micromanage my social life and girl. we're not close enough for that #im sure its well intentioned but im not part of what they have going on i cant compete in that ring so dont try to push me into it.. #ahhh. its all ok tho one of the guys is coming to visit next month which will be rly fun but ill try to give them some space too #its good at least im doing this processing now bc group situations can be spike traps of triggers for me sometimes #regardless of how good friends i am w ppl and ive already had a wobble a few weeks ago w how i cope and i dont want it to become a #fully fledged regular issue again bc its so hard to crawl back out of that pit. anyway losing coherence here im gonna stop rambling #and go make myself an early dinner and then back to drawing........ #sorry for long tags if ur reading this blows u a kiss but go find a better use of ur time girl!! #.diaries

[wickershells]

txt

#i am actually the worst person alive every now and then the weight of all the guilt and grief and humiliation really hits me #i am not liked at all and i keep eroding all of my remaining relationships and i have fucked up my life beyond repair and i am #truly never getting out of this cycle no matter what meds i take at what dosage or if i talk out my feelings or if i keep them inside #or if i get therapy or if i dont if i have friends if i dont if my family likes me if they dont if my dog is alive or if hes dead its just #me theres something broken in me no matter how hard i believe and try and hope and pray i just wont get better i always end up here #i have consistently been the worst most absent friend i have ruined everything ive touched i feel contagious im contagious #i cant expect people to keep loving me and i definitely cant expect them to keep saying it over and over when it isnt true and they dont #want to and people dont even ask if im alright anymore they already know im not and just dont care because how could they #i dont get better it would just weigh on them all the time and how fair is that really i wish no one had ever met me i wish i wish #i betray all my promises to myself and others and im so stupid im so dumb and i just. theres nothing at all in here #i cant stand the loneliness anymore but i dont deserve anything else. do you see #and its my fault people no longer care its all my fault im so alone. i feel so alone. no one can know me and love me and they will all #be fine they have everyone they need they have everyone they want. i am no one at all not even to myself #theres an abyss where my personhood should be #i have to leave i have to get out of here

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#my dads back in ohio again so im back on my own. i still feel terrible but at least i have a plan #i have 2 weeks of this semester left. so i have to not fail my genomics exam and work on a group project plus grade a bunch #shouldnt be too hard but everything makes me so tired rn and i just feel this barrier between myself and everything else #even when my dad was here. i just dont kno how to feel happy. just varied levels of stress #but after the semester is over ill have to find a job for the summer. which super stresses me out bc i havent really had a real job outside #academia and im worried about how stressful ill find it bc im sure its gonna suck but at least i wont have to work on my project #i just think if i had a normal job that doesnt dominate every aspect of my life id feel a little less terrible. or at least i wouldnt send #myself spiralling so much. if i stay here i might not survive it #but what if ill just make myself miserable wherever i am? i dunno. but im gonna try to find a non academic job this summer with the epa or #maybe the usgs. i mean ive gota a bachelor's and a masters in environmental topics. that's gotta count for something #just get a government job. pray for a not terrible set of coworkers. and build something from there #it just sucks bc i feel like everythings falling apart and like i kno if i gave it my all i could pull thru and get my phd but im just so #tired of struggling against something everyone else can do. i just cant read at a level appropriate for what im doing #ugh. i dont wanna study for genomics. i just wanna sleep. i just wish i wasn't in this position #and now i a baby about it. i mean my sisters r in similar positions bc the youngest is currently looking for a teaching job. and my middle #sister is looking to move to new york city in the next 6 months and she'd be quitting her job for that. so we're all sorta in flux #i just wanna not be flailing. not watch my hopes and dreams collapse. be excited about anything. im just sad bc i have to make hard choices #even if i know theyre the right ones to make if i want to continue to exist. sometimes u cant have the things u wany. #and that sucks and i hate it. theme of the year: sometimes life sucks and theres nothing u can do abt it #unrelated

[skenpiel]

IM SO HAPPY TO BE BETTER!!!!!!! i had a full meal for the first time in days with faucking. fries and hot dogs and mash potato. i literally feel like i could weep with joy rn

#being sick and in pain is like…. i can stand it for a couple hours #but then i legitimately become‚ like‚ suicidal #im like. this sucks so fucking bad actually i cant take it anymore. id legitimately rather die than be in this much pain for a second longer #of course i have to keep taking it cause theres nothing i can do and im just generally pretty overdramatic when it comes to pain #but laying there with all my. fucking. pains and whatever for hours on end #the only thought on my mind was how badly i wish it would just. stop. so i could catch a BREAK #so now the only thought on my mind is how happy i am i dont hurt anymore ^___^ #like i forgot how great it feels to not be in agonizing pain. lmao #ANYWAYS!!!!!! again im just being really dramatic it sucked but genuinely it wasnt that bad but still im glad its over #and like i said i got hella sleep to catch up on so ill see yall later ghehehe

[toaster-selfships]

I normally don't make vent posts on this blog(even though no one really sees this blog anyways) but I'm going to completely spill in the tags ✌️JCJDJSJ

#i swear i used to be able to gush so much #and then a bunch of stuff happened and now i feel a weird feeling in my stomach every time i do it #it just feels like its a waste of time or no one really cares about what im saying #i talk with a selfshipping friend on discord and they gush all the time and i feel like i can never get a word in #i still gush a bunch but i just feel like im taking up space and time whenever i vocalize it #i feel like no one cares #like normally if youre friend is into something you care about that something as well a little or have some compassion for iy #cause its important to your friend so it has some value to you as well #i feel like there is zero value or care or compassion for what i say #but like...especially with gushing #i so wish i could describe the feeling or have words for it cause its such a unique feeling that i havent entirely felt before #i feel like theres never any room for me to talk. like theres only enough time for others to talk and nothing left over for me #or like im constantly interrupting every conversation even if its dead silent and we havent talked in an hour #or like i always bring it up at a bad time #i used to be able to gush so much and so freely but now i feel like i feel bad after every time i do it #even sometimes i feel bad gushing HERE. on MY blog that is for SELFSHIPPING and gushing and talking about my F/Os #sometimes i have trouvle even tryint to gush cause it feels like i dont even know what to say anymore cause i hardly ever get to do it #like everything is always about someone else and never about me

[voidimp]

sometimes things that are more accessible... are less accessible (just to different people) (i am mostly thinking about the push for websites & apps to be High Contrast without consideration that some people actually need the opposite) (me) (whether its dark on light or light on dark if the contrast is too high it feels like its screaming at me to the point where on bad days i literally cannot get my brain to focus on whatever im supposed to be looking at) (migraines especially but sometimes it just happens on its own) (there is no one Good And Correct way to make something accessible to everyone you have to make it customizable you need to provide options)

#my phone has an option to throw a color filter over the screen but it kinda sucks bc i cant change the saturation of it just the opacity #so putting it on a higher opacity lowers the contrast but it also makes it. so fucking sepia #i wish i could JUST lower the contrast. it has a toggle to INCREASE screen contrast but nothing to DECREASE it #but this also doesnt help me like. at work. doing data entry. which is all pure black & white scans..... #theres only so much monitor adjustments can do (the contrast option doesnt even Work That Way) #& were not allowed to change the computer display settings (even the blue light filter is disabled. lmao.) #& we cant download anything so if theres something out there that would wash out my screen i still wouldnt be able to use it... #like dgmw im glad they ARE implementing these things to try to make things more accessible #but it would be nice if they could understand that its not one size fits all.....

[frogathy]

just talked to my counselor about being on the spectrum and my mom understands now and i am just so relieved its insane like everything makes sense it is so insane and like i dont have to feel like theres anything wrong with me anymore its just hoohkhjgghdhj

#AAAAUHHHHHHSHahajdj i am so so so happyyy im so happy #its insane how validating just talking to someone who will listen to you can be #im so happy im so happy #like. now i understand that i can see the world through my own eyes instead of looking at other people to find out what it is to act human #like hoooly shit i might not actually have social anxiety. social anxiety is like ‘i wish i could be a part of that but im not’ #but i realized that actually i just.. dont want to be a part of it LMAOAOAO #i just never wanted to have people over or go to other peoples houses and i have always been content with that #but the problem has been that other people expect things of me and i dont understabd them #the anxiety comes from masking and trying to be someone im not and trying to look happy all the time and trying to act ‘human’ all the time #turns out i am perfectly content to not have anyone to talk to. perfectly content having no friends at youth group #perfectly content on my own and ive always felt terrible about it because it has nothing to do with my friends and i feel awful bc why #wouldnt you want to spend time with someone you love you know #its just ohhhh its a lot to think about and understand about myself and gosh its insane its insane theres so many things that make sense and #i have a lot of thinking to do. lots to do. lots of self evalutation to happen yup yup #froegis meep tag

[thefunniestguy]

OUGH

#vent #vent in tags #i genuinely wish so badly that i could go back just . 2 years w the knowledge i have now #current living situations are bad and im not being dramatic when i say that ONE decision made everything the way it is today (not good) #i dont care if id have to go through any of the bad days again - i would relive every single one of the bad days from these 2 years #if it meant i could change that ONE thing . im not even sure i could convince my family not to do it but id do anything to just TRY #ough deja vu doesnt help wh #anyway YEAH looking back at old pictures i donot care about any 'good' that came from it bc the bad is so much worse #i dont even care if i learn a lesson from this. i HAVE but its a lesson i already knew and didnt need to 'learn the hard way' #its stupid but . at this point my little brain is practically wishing on stars and wish fountains /hj #i just wanna . start over . start this point of my life over . rewrite this certain chapter yk #theres a lot i wouldnt do different but . those little things that had a negative domino effect yk ? #i know theres no going back seeing as my life isnt a movie so . i know i just have to move on and do what i can but #the frustrating part is theres so little that i can do . no matter how hard i try nothing i do to try and help this is even worthwhile #GRRRR and if i said the reason then it would sound ridiculous and dumb so im not gonna say but its genuinely not ridiculous and dumb to me #ive got one year until i can attempt to put this behind me but hhhhh ill feel bad bc im also leaving the people i actually care for behind #imean my friends are fine off- this doesnt affect them- but ive spent all my life trying to protect my mom and sister anddd #i wont be there to protect them #HHHHHHHHHHhhhh

[aced0g]

small vent :/

#vent #i hate getting burnt out over stupid shit... like i get that my ptsd fucked up my brain #i get that i have to jump more hurdles to do normal shit than others #but i just get so tired and then i feel like i'm just faking it faking being a person #and theres nothing i can do because i still have to get up and do the whole cycle again the next day and the day after that #like sure my job pays well but i can only work 3 days a week cause anymore and i risk having a meltdown and it makes me feel like a kid #i keep applying to other jobs #jobs i could do from home and ones that would be accommodating to my needs but nooo no one wants to get back to me #and it just makes me feel more alone cause ive got like one person irl i can talk to but i don't want to dump on them #and like yes i have friends online but when im in a funk like this nothing feels real unless i can physically touch it #i just wish i could hibernate or something and wake up totally fixed and rejuvinated instead of waking up as exhausted as i was before #but yea #just another day to live with shit #i feel like all i can do sometimes is just keep pushing forward keep living the next day #but at the same time it feels like ive been taking life day by day since i was 6

[silenthillbunni]

🐁☁️🌫️

#sorry gnna sound like a shit person now but im not feeling well i just need to rant #nothing good ever happens to me. every aspect of my life is a mess. im constantly miserable w nothing to pull me out of it #it's been getting worse nd worse for years nd if it keeps getting worse im not gnna be able to take it much longer #ofc there are sooo many others who have it way way way worse than i do. so i feel weak nd pathetic for being so affected by it when i know #it could be literally sm worse than it is now. like i get that. i know im not nearly as bad off as many ppl are #but idk still it's rlly tough to have *nothing* that makes me keep going. the literal only thing is that i dont kms bc i dont wanna hurt mom #bc im poor so i cant do ANYTHING. i cant go anywhere. not the cinema not concerts not to the mall not to the bookstore not an amusent park #i cant even go to cafées bc i dont have any money at all to spend on that #i have no friends to hang out w. even if i couldnt afford going anywhere i cant even just take a walk or sit nd talk to them bc there r none #my sisters havent talked for me in over a year #and like yada yada i dont have anything to pull me out of my misery bubble. no friends to comfort me no family to hang out w #nothing to do or nowhere to go. hell i havent even been able to eat for 8 months so i cant even like eat smth yummy nd watch a movie lmao #i cant even read bc of the constant noise! i cant go out into the forest bc there r always subway construction work or choppers or gun shots #i know im 'focusing on the negative' but what am i supposed to do when theres nothing positive to focus on lol????? #im always physically uncomfortable bc of pain nd health issues nd im always anxious nd stressed too so like... yay #and. this is where i sound mean but like after years nd years of nothing good happening to me... idc for others anymore like #when they talk abt their loving relationships and their kind friends nd them going to concerts im like.. wow !! u get to be happy!! i dont!! #im just envious nd jealous nd bitter bc why cant i have ANYTHING good???? not just ONE fkn thing? #other ppl get to have multiple things but i get nothing????? #and its not exactly like i hate them or wish illwill on them im just like wow kinda dont feel sympathy for u bc u have sm things #i've never had :))) nd u can never understand how awful it feels to be deprived of it so idc :))))

[lazorsandparadox]

God i know bisan cant exactly organize long term in the position shes in, but this weeklong strike is not going to happen, it literally cant. A 3 day notice is not long enough to raise a strike fund or for strikers to save pto or even just cash to help mitigate the cost for people to survive missing a week of work, not to mention those wholl lose their jobs if they just dont show up for week with no warning.

Part of the point of a strike is to use it as leverage before the strike takes place. Besides giving people time to prepare and raise a strike fund so they dont lose their homes or the ability to feed themselves during and after the strike, the point of announcing a strike months or even over a year beforehand is so that you can go to the people you want to negotiate with and say "hey, if you dont do this thing we all want, this many people are already willing and prepared to go on strike and cost you money" and make them negotiate with you so they know what is being demanded and can maybe even give it to you before the strike has taken place. The best outcome for a strike is for it to get results before it happens!

People have not prepared for this strike, no one has informed the people we are protesting against about the strike or its demands, theres nothing in place to help the people that will lose their jobs if they participate, which means most people simply are not GOING to participate. Thats not an organized strike. Thats just a bunch of random people whove happened to abandon their jobs at the same time. Thats not going to pressure anyone into doing anything.

If people really think a strike is the way to go, then someome in a better position than bisan needs to actually put in the work to organize one. Actually go around and contact unions and get them in on organizing one. Because change IS possible, but you wont get it by taking random swings at the machine and hoping your hand doesnt get caught in it.

#and again i KNOW its not bisans fault #shes doing her best in the situation shes in #but for a strike to even have a chance it needs at absolute minimum either established union backing #or over a month of prior warning and planning per day of strike so people can at peast save up pto or something #the first strike was called for about a month ago - if that had inatead been a call for a one day strike to happen now #a bunch of people couldve actually prepared and maybe thered be a greater impact because of it #but a 3 day notice on a week long atrike is nothing. especially when most people have to pay rent at the end of this week specifically #you might as well not have called a atrioe at all in these conditions #people need to actually organize if they want to do this shit but the problem is that no one other than bisan is trying to #im not tagging this anything particular because its more of a vent really #i wish this could happen but theres just not enough time to make it so

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#it's so weird trying to describe yourself when u really aren't something u used to be #like until i was probably 21 or so id say i was shy. very very shy. but now im like was that even true? was i ever shy bc im not now #maybe i was just quiet and anxious. maybe thats just what being shy is. but im still both of those things but im not shy #im sorta like a hermit. i dont really go around ppl if i can avoid it but i dont hate being around ppl. its just that im less anxious when #im alone. but if u put me around ppl i like to talk to them so im not shy. ill say whatever. i dont really give a fuck #but if u throw me in a group i go back to being a non entity. i guess thats just being an introvert with an asocial streak #thats a thing i noticed while i was at the grad weekend i attended in march. the group would gather and do things while i kinda just #wandered away from them to poke at trees and sit in the snow. i dunno i just feel better away from ppl. my brain gets a lot louder if ive #been too social. which is a shame bc its interesting to watch ppl and understand how thry work #my friend came over to day goodbye before i leave next week. which was nice. i wish we would have hung out more in person but so it goes #and i think in my head im a lot more contained thst i actually am. like if u set me a task that becomes my focus but im also sorta all over #the place. partly bc i think my brain works on like a lag. and also my mood is a little elevated rn so im sorta like *jazz hands* and #talking too fast and too much and oversharing. yesterday i was instrucing an undergrad and felt so bad bc my brain was all over the place. #could not b made linear. im tired now tho bc theres nothing more draining than being emotionally honest and talking for like 2hrs. woof. it #so hot. like fucking so hot bc the monsoons have started and humidity is up so my swamp cooler is fucked and its gotta b at least 80 degree #inside my apartment. holy christ. and the temp has been over 100 degrees for like at least 2 weeks. its so hot its kinda alarming. and im #glad my friend was also freaked out by how hot its been bc oh god its hot. and i cant focus. ive done fuck all today. but i did get rid of #couch which is so so so great. ugh. someone make the sun stop making it so hot #unrelated #its been over 100 degrees outside for like 2 weeks. not on my apartment #and when i say i wish i spent more time with my friend irl. i mean it in a distant sort of way. like thats how im supposed to feel. like i #dont kno if thats actually what i feel or i kno im supposed to b social but idk if i actually mean it

[marxistbrat]

i feel it i *feel* Bad Brain returning

#ed go brrrrrr #like. my stomach is making me want to kill myself but mostly its my chest but theres nothing i can do and i could let my ed take over and li #e to ppl and go vegan even as a pretext or maybe i can get really serious about exercise but that would require having a modicum of self con #trol and i have no clntrol over anything other than my reactions to things and i dont even have control over that #i say things and j dont why and i think im so desparate to make eveyone around me happy at all times i dont know how to stop i dont know how #to react that most minimizes pain except i DO know i just crumble and fail #and god i i wish my chest and abdomen were concave #just. hollow #please god its not fair im so hollow inwardly my physique should reflect it

[toastsnaffler]

i will ALWAYS be salty abt the ed-sheeranification of one ok rock (one of my fave personality-building anecdotes i explain at parties to ppl getting to know me) but the fact is that takas voice is soooo hot he could sing the words on the back of a milk carton to the tune of a t*ylor sw*ft song + id probably still listen to him. sorry

#well actually that isnt true bc i very rarely ever listen to oor anymore. theyve made so much terrible music its tainted their good shit #but like twice a year i go back thru their discography and reminisce over niche syndrome.....a guy can dream #whenever they release new stuff i always get my hopes up theyre gonna go back to their roots and they never do. saaad #but i have this weird grandmotherly love for taka whenever i see him in music videos for his new stuff im like aww how Nice :^) #wish he hadnt outgrown his emo phase but thats ok im glad hes enjoying himself and the band seems to be popular still #.diaries #i do have a big old soft spot for ambitions era even if its kinda mid. its associated w a lot of nice memories i have of my ex #if nothing else i appreciate how earnest their music was around then.... god listening now and i still know All The Lyrics lmfao #still mad they replaced the japanese vers with an english rerecord for release outside of japan tho. that was unnecessary 😐 #maaann my ex had VERY different music taste to me but its sweet how many bands are rose tinted for me bc of them #like theres some stuff i would never have voluntarily listened to. but listening to them talk excitedly carved a niche in my ears #they made me a bunch of playlists for things they found that they thought id like.. i still have some of them saved/backed up #im surprised some of the ogs still exist tbh bc they unfollowed me on spotify + privated/deleted a ton of shit like a year ago #but a couple r still standing.. idk id like to think maybe they left them bc they had some nice memories too. i could never hate them man #SORRY FOR TALKING ABT MY EX AGAIN this music just takes me right back. im v glad we're not dating or in each others lives anymore #but also u cant be that close w someone for that long without them having a lifelong impact on u. or at least i cant anyway #and its nice to remember them fondly sometimes even if we were both cunts to each other. hope theyre doing alright wherever they are #god i need to start dating again its so fun i miss it so much. once im settled in the new place + i have a secure job.... #i mean ik who id LIKE to date but im pretty sure that aint happening lmaooo. ill get over it i love meeting new ppl anyway #okay enough rambling im gonna go make lunch if ur reading this far ily hope ur having a nice day XOXO aaaaand post

[thebubblemaster]

.

#i need to like vent somewhere and this is as good a place as any bc tumblr hides long tags so pple can just scross past but #having chronic fatigue is so frustrating because im either asleep or exhausted and basic tasks feel impossible #during a fatigue spell i just cant function and i lose track of the time and the day and the world feels like it just moves around me #i have to save the little energy i have for feeding myself and maintaining my hygiene so sometimes i just lay in bed half asleep #i can either scroll through my phone or watch a video or something else that requires little movement or thought #bc if im not i might cry from how frustrated i am and how heavy my body feels and how sluggish my brain is and how slow my words are #and i just #comparing the really bad days to the really good ones brings a lot of melancholy bc the difference is so stark #on my best days i wake up early and clean my room and work out and get my hw done and go to every class and walk on campus #ill keep up with my laundry and dishes and ill go out with my roommates or meet with a friend or make it through a work shift #these are all such ordinary things that i take for granted when im well that i wish i could do at least one of when im unwell #i used to think it was laziness or stress or lack of sleep #i used to push myself to the point of feeling faint and get mad at myself for not being able to handle everyday life #i used to have breakdowns over my inability to function and have my parents list off all the things i was doing wrong that made me tired #i asked my mom if maybe i should go to the doctor and get some tests and she would tell me that theres no magical cure #that if my tests came back with nothing wrong then what would i do #even now knowing im developing a thyroid issue i find myself angry that there are days i cant do anything because of my fatigue #i would give anything to be functional even 80% of the time #ive never known what its like to not be slightly tired and unfocused and uncomfortable #its depressing