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#is it any wonder that sklonda asks
thisisnotthenerd · 2 months
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thinking about riz gukgak and how he feels so alone and yet how his words, his works, are the first thought for his friends when they don’t know what to do
thinking about how love is work, how love is the act of giving and giving and giving until you have nothing left and yet he cannot ever prioritize himself
thinking about how he takes every nickname, every gift, every moment of care with an eagerness that far outstrips the gift in its giving
thinking about how his every stress comes from a moment of devotion and care for his friends, from unraveling the mysteries that permeate their lives
thinking about how he could call them to action with a single warning because they trust in him so much
thinking about how he justifies what he gives to his friends even as his mother asks him to consider himself for once
thinking about riz ‘the ball’ gukgak
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jq37 · 1 month
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The Report Card – Fantasy High Junior Year Ep 11
Bad Kids Have a Normal Time in Fallinel Challenge (Impossible)
Welcome back to the longest episode of this season so far–a delight as a fan of this show but an absolute notetaking nightmare as your resident recapper. But a LOT of noteworthy things happened this episode so let’s get going! 
We’ll start off with Riz and Fig tagging along with Sklonda to investigate Loam Farm. Before they head out, Fig (with help from Riz) sends an email to Lola hitting up Ruben about the “podcast” from a burner account. Lola emails Fig back saying he’s booked for the rest of the year, but will have a lot of availability in the new year. 
Once they’re on their way, Riz asks his mom about the Spies Tongue Curse and she doesn’t know anything but points out that maybe it’s actually Spy’s Tongue Curse. Riz shoots Adaine a text so she can investigate. When they arrive, Riz casts Invisibility on Skonda (sensible) and Fig disguises herself as an orangutan (sure) and then they get investigating. Here’s a rundown of what they find:
The backyard of the farm is beautiful and Sklonda says the animals are being sold off since the Loams’ kids aren’t farmers. Fig wonders if this was some kind of gambit so someone could buy the farm for cheap.
With his spy tech, Riz pings powerful infernal presence and magic coming from behind the home. When they check it out they find the back porch demolished in a way that’s similar to the scene at the lake. Sklonda says this is where the bodies were found. 
On a Nat 20 Investigation, Riz sees that there’s this red glass dust crushed into the soil of the crime scene that is identical to the shade of the rage shatter stars. He feels that there’s some connection to some earlier case and maybe a photo he has but he can’t quite make the connection and he feels like if he could investigate the Loams’ bodies, he’ll be able to figure something out. 
Fig prestidigitations a shatter star missing a tiny bit and one of the shards in the ground floats up and connects to her illusion. As her mental state is a bit agitated and confused because of all her self-discovery stuff that she’s going through, the star darts around in a bit of a confused manner before quickly stabbing her. She and Riz wonder if this reaction means the stars are more nuanced than just being about rage. 
Riz asks his mom if there’s a way they can look at the bodies and she goes off to make a phone call. 
Molman texts, apologizes for freaking out, and tells Riz that he tested the soil and it has some weird extraplanar mineral elements. He’s only seen it in one other place in town which is 1223 Ashgrove Blvd–Ragh’s old place that was destroyed during Sophomore Year while they were at Leviathan. 
Sklonda reports what she learned from her cop contacts: The Loams died from force damage, their blood carbonized and turned to red crystal. Riz thinks maybe they just hulked out and burned out–the damage came from within. This is bolstered when Sklonda said they didn’t have any defensive wounds. 
It’s late but Fig and Riz have everyone meet up so they can discuss. Adaine insists they meet at Basrar’s cause she’s working (girl you need better shifts). The detective duo reports everything they learned and Kristen wants to compare her Cass shards to the sample of crushed red dust Fig brought from Loam Farm. As she does this, Adaine casts Identify. Brennan asks what all three girls are feeling. The answers: Post-emotion tired from work (Adaine), Naked Curiosity (Fig), Concern (Kristen). 
A lot of things happen at once. The red dust whips around the Cass shards and glows, making a “concerned ball” looking for some kind of opening to enter. The Identify spell freaks out and says that it’s a lot of power but seems very confused or overwhelmed about what’s happening. When Kristen asks if it’s two power sources or one, the spell waffles on an answer: 2 in 1? 1 in 2?
On a 28 Insight Kristen notes that the red shards acted in an assertive and aggressive way but didn’t attack the Cass shards or anyone else. However, when Adaine casts Identify, they do attack her. Kristen shoots off a Banishment and then hits a Nat 20 Perception, saving Adaine from damage and getting a glimpse at where these red shards are presumably from. 
Kristen sees endless red, thrumming blood and smells rot. She hears screams of horror. It’s the interior of some kind of vast, horrifying body beyond the astral plane. Presumably the dead god. She yells, “Cassandra!” and purple, misty light rushes in to extinguish some of the red, fiery light in the body. There is movement and Kristen hears a gasp before the vision fades. 
They speculate a bit Gorgug wonders if the reaction to the name is the dead god reacting to hearing their wife’s name. They wonder if this dead god went through a similar archfeyification to Cass (which is what happened when Cass became the Nightmare King) and became this scary entity. They then check out Ragh’s house and Riz on a 24 Investigation finds that the destruction, though cleared, is similar to what they saw at Loam farm. Adaine with Arcana sees traces of the shatter star dust in the soil here, just like Molman said. It seems to track with where the impact craters are. 
Kristen picks up some of the infected dust and thinks about things that make her angry (specifically how Buddy talks to her and Bobby Dawn maybe being the new cleric teacher) and on a dirty 20 insight, her Cass shards glow in almost sympathy but the red shards form a glass spear that hover near her eye. She releases the rage, thinking that they’re not worth it and the spear stabs her cheek for 5 points of damage. Gorgug grabs it before it can do any more damage and it turns back to sand. 
It’s late so everyone heads home except for Adaine who scooters over to Aelwyn’s place to pick her brain/check on her. Aelwyn answers, wearing a snuggie, and ushers Adaine in for the classic sister tradition of eating ice cream and watching reality TV together (in this case specifically a cooking show with a Gordon Ramsy-esque host). Aelwyn asks Adaine about her love life (Adaine refuses to elaborate) Adaine asks Aelwyn about her social life (nonexistent). They both get really emotional about Aelwyn adopting 10, old, unloved shelter cats to fill the hole in her heart and Adaine invites Aelwyn to do crimes with her and her crew instead of doing the lone wolf thing. 
With regard to actual business items Aelwyn says that, much like Ruben, KP told her that she's not going to need her until the new year. Adaine offhandedly mentions the Gilear curse and realizes that her sister is an extremely powerful and knowledgeable wizard who spent the last two years enmeshed in evil plots so she probably knows tons about curses and is very eager to help. Obviously she should ask Aelwyn about all their curse stuff! Put a pin in that because, later,  Aelwyn says she’ll handle that once they get to Fallinel. But there are two last bits of business from this conversation. Aelwyn said she got a job offer to work at the Compass Points Library to fill in for Ayda which Adaine heavily approves of. And Aelwyn also haltingly says that Adaine coming to visit her and watching TV was the best part of her day. Awwww!
Fig continues her mental warfare against Ruben that night and enters his dream disguised as KP. She makes the dream look like the crime scene and says that someone has to take the fall and it can’t be her. It has to be him. Adaine throws her a portent to help her get her Persuasion roll to a 23 which results in Adaine appearing in the vision ethereally, full elven oracle. Ruben puts his hands over his mouth and this red, blood looking liquid oozes from between his fingers. Spooky! 
The next morning they have the last day of school before winter break. Kristen wants to check into Ambrosia and Devil’s Nectar. Ambrosia, she remembers her parents talking about as special corn that Helio would grow and food of the gods. Devil’s Nectar she is able to learn more about from Gertie on a campaign stop (who, btw, is fully working for KP now–clearly Fabian needs to be stopped). She says that Devil’s Nectar can be used to make a special red honey (which I’ll just call Devil’s Honey for ease) that allows you to be more persuasive and lie to beings that usually can’t be lied to. However, it has a side effect of making you so persuasive that if you overuse it, you can start to believe your own lies (she doesn’t say how much would be overuse). Kristen asks if she’s made any recently and she said she did for some food trucks (which seems like a wild thing to do just food safety wise but I guess Solace is a wild place). Fig wonders if what she saw dripping from Ruben’s mouth was actually devil’s honey, not blood. Kristen makes out with Gertie who has apparently had a crush on her this whole time. Normal Kristen behavior. 
We tie up some loose ends before we head for Fallinel:
Riz gets a 3 sp stipend from Jace for all the work he’s done with all the clubs. It is apparently one of the few things keeping the school together. Riz is not only the backbone of the Bad Kids, he’s the backbone of the whole damn school. As a result, he is now interim staff. Wild. 
Kristen asks Mazey what she thinks about Bobby Dawn being the new cleric teacher. She’s already acting principal and she wants to vet him with every cleric student before she gives a yes. Kristen doesn’t like the idea but she knows pass/fail will be really bad for her party so she can’t in good conscience say no. She also asks for (and gets) a copy of the bylaws and the previous bylaws when Mazey says they were changed over the summer. Suspicious. 
Adaine is told she’ll have to do a research paper by her professor and she says she might want to do it on hard to break curses. Her teacher, Tiberia Runestaff, says she can get 10 points of extra credit if she does research over the break on harnessing the power of broken curses. (Note: First time this has come up so it feels like a slight mystery nudge from Brennan) To help, she points Adaine in the direction of some relevant books. 
Gorgug is starting to make some breakthroughs on connecting his Barb and Artificer stuff. During a conversation with Henry, he realizes that he has the same last name as Ruben and Henry confirms that Ruben is his nephew. Suspicious, Gorgug does an Insight check and on a 11 just gets nice vibes from Henry. He asks about whether he helped with making Grix and Henry says that he consulted but obviously he didn’t want him to go nuts and try to kill his nephew. Gorgug looks around for anything related to Grix and on a Nat 20 perception sees a glimpse of Grix’s motherboard in Genry’s desk drawer while he’s distracted. Gorgug notes it but doesn’t grab it because he doesn’t think he has the time. 
Finally, Fig has a little chat with Zara and says that she’s better at pledging herself to others than herself so she hasn’t figured out her pact yet. Zara says that will put her a bit behind but is very supportive and gives her a book on pre-Celestial pagan deities on her request. She also mentions that she plans to stay her holidays in the Celestial Heights with her divine patron/paramour. Talk about mixing business and pleasure. Get it girl!
Off to Fallinel! Everyone is coming including Zayne–they brought his gravestone along since he’s tethered to it. Telemaine is bringing his weird energy as usual and Hilariel seems strangely concerned about whether Fabian was throwing parties or not considering she seems OK with it in a wink wink nudge nudge kinda way when she left. Gilear sidebars with Fig because he’s freaked out about his string of good luck. He found a puppy that grants wishes. He used the wishes to stop 3 apocalypses. He keeps getting the key to the city. It’s madness! Fig tries to soothe him by telling him he deserves all of the good luck but it’s not helping. He misses the yogurt on his shirt. 
It happens to be winter in Fallinel which is notable because it’s been summer for the past 1000 years or so–guess the weather matches the unchanging nature of the island’s occupants. Hilariel says that the change of the seasons is Tracker’s doing though she’s not 100% clear on the mechanics. With the mention of Tracker, Riz tries to scan the moon to get the same read as he did when he got the lock on Bakur from Lydia but he’s not getting anything which he figures might be because of range. He says he’ll try again on Tracker or another moon cleric. 
They also ask about Tracker’s new girlfriend, Nara, and a couple of people know her. Telemaine knows of her but gives an answer so long-winded that he entirely loses the plot. Ragh met her when he was evangelizing with Tracker and thinks she’s nice and Aelwyn also knows her. She, being Aelwyn, offers to help deal with her in a way that sounds like killing her is not off the table but they decided that they should proooooobably try just talking first. 
Sandra-Lynn has a little aside with Fig where she pleads with her to take her curse a bit more seriously because it’s majorly stressing her out to see her only daughter in the world suffering under an unknown curse. She also apologizes for how short she was with Fig when her horns first started growing in and is understanding about Fig’s struggles with introspection and navigating such a big shift in identity. She suggests that Fig might want to talk to her friends about how she’s been struggling and get their take on it because she’s found that others are often kinder mirrors than one’s own self image but Fig thinks that nakedly asking such a vulnerable question sounds mortifying. 
Adaine hits up Aelwyn and Zayne (who is, hello, an ex-bad guy and a literal necromancer) about curse stuff and they have some good info!
Aelwyn is very familiar with Spy’s Tongue Curse. It’s a “handshake curse” where two people enter into an agreement (it has to be willing) and once it’s in effect, neither of them can name their co-conspirator (even just writing the name). 
Aelwyn had to modify that spell for Kalina in order to make it work on non-humanoids but she doesn’t know who she used it on. It might have been on herself. This was near the end of Freshman year. It was the vibe of Kalina wanting to work with people who wouldn’t work with her unless they were under the protection of Spy's Tongue. Best Aelwyn knows, it was involved with some of her Hotel Cavelier contacts (Note: This is where the BK’s fought a bunch of demons in SY Ep 3). Kalina was very annoyed about it. 
The last thing that Aelwyn impresses on them is that names are extremely magically powerful and Fallinel is extremely old with great records so, if they’re looking for names, this is a pretty good place. 
Riz is frustrated by the similarities between all these mechanisms to make people not be able to say a name of forget information (Spy’s Tongue, Oblivati Mori, Devil’s Honey) that seem connected but don’t quite line up yet. I am feeling similarly. 
The Bad Kids plus the Reformed Villain Squad head to the Wolfsong HQ and see it’s all the way decked out like (as Kristen gets on a Nat 20 Insight check) Narnia Burning Man. There are all the comfy yurts, high elves serving hot chocolate with flavored marshmallows, and a giant snowball fight. Clearly someone has invested a LOT of money in this. Fig and Fabian right away head to the snowball course but the others meet up with Tracker who’s with Nara. Tracker explains what happened with the snow: some of the trad clerics were saying that all her talk of change was heresy so she performed a miracle and made the seasons change as kind of a checkmate. “If our goddess is so against change then explain this.”
They rapid fire fish for some info–Tracker talks to Galicaea (which I’m gonna shorten to Gal from now on) about once a week, Gal has good relationships with pretty much all non-evil gods and is only isolated insomuch as her followers isolated her, Adaine checks to see if Nara can read/speak the word Kalina and she can. 
Kristen pulls Tracker aside to ask about the clear influx of cash and Tracker says that Nara’s parents are kind of bankrolling the whole operation. Which is kind of wild because they originally send Nara to keep an eye on her. Kristen is deeply suspicious and a bit put off by what seems to her like selling out. When she pushes Tracker on the topic, Tracker gets a little defensive and asks if it would be better if the cocoa had dirt in it or if it was just her in a basement alone with Craig. On a dirty 20 insight, Kristen sees that Tracker was deeply bothered by the line of questioning. Kristen is stinging from the comeback but doesn’t fly off the handle and she ends up having a productive little dialogue about what “success” means in this field which ends with a hug. Adaine clocks that Nara looks a bit hurt by their continued closeness. Riz notices that Nara is texting someone on a crystal (something she must have picked up from Tracker) and wants to check it out if he can because he thinks that even if she’s on the level she might be working with sketch people unknowingly. 
Nearby, the party notices this circle of ancient lichen covered standing stones that are kind of away from the more commercial, rowdy parts of the camp. Fig uses her Divine Sense to ping that it’s radiating some serious diving energy and correctly guesses that it has the effect of the Hallow spell. There’s a lot of Sylvan writing but also proto-Sylvan and it’s dedicated to Galicaea but also other pre-Gal deities (including Giant ones). The sense is that this circle was already here and holy before Gal and co showed up. 
The gang has a secret Sylvan gift exchange (that was organized by Siobhan in the last Adventuring Party)! Here’s what everyone gets:
Adaine gets Fabian a pipe that lets him call rats. 
Fabian gets Adaine an “earworm” which horrifically burrows into her brain but can be used to cast Detect Thoughts and DIssonant Whispers using its charges. 
Fig gets Kristen an “Immovable Pull up Bar” (reskinned Immovable Rod of course). 
Kristen gets Riz Riddler themed Bracers of defense which are of questionable fashion sense but soooo tactical (+2 to AC when not wearing armor). 
RIz gets Gorgug a Potion of Giant Strength in the form of a gnarly energy drink that ups his strength to 25 for an hour. (It is VERY not legal)
Gorgug gets Fig the Mask of Beasts which lets her cast Animal Friendship. It is shaped like an orangutan. 
Fabian summons some rats. Fig makes them sexy. They show hole. Regular Bad Kid antics. In the midst of the chaos, Fabian texts Mazey a selfie of everyone (warning her not to zoom into the rats) and says that he hopes she’s having a good break and maybe they can hang out when he’s back. He then puts his phone in airplane mode as quickly as he can. 
They’re heading to bed but Nara checks on them. Specifically, she wants to talk to Kristen and says she’s happy that she came and she hopes they can be friends. Kristen gets the vibe that she’s here trying to be the bigger person after maybe having some messy thoughts earlier. Not really nefarious but very measured and trying to say the right thing. Nara reveals that she tried to do a revival as well but her follow through wasn’t great and it fell apart. Kristen realizes that Nara is a lot like her except with enough money to have a lot more support. She also mentions that her parents are clerics (which we kinda knew) but they’re more like deacons or office workers than miracle workers like Kristen or Tracker. They weren’t huge fans of Tracker to start with but Nara said they came around and hey, they are funding everything with their deep elven pockets. When Kristen asks about the pre-Gal origins of the standing stones, Nara doesn’t seem to know anything about them and the Bad Kids figure they should stop pushing and check it out themselves. The ex-villain trio set up a perimeter and the Bad Kids check out the stones. 
First some quick theories:
Riz wonders if Nara’s parents (or someone else) is doing all this funding to try and make Tracker’s worthy cause seem less serious. 
Fabian wonders if there is some kind of plot to get this movement all big and then merge something else into it. 
Fig wonders if with all the mind trickery happening, there are maybe gods who think they’re gods but aren’t really. 
Because Fig has determined that this Hallow spell isn’t gonna hurt them as it’s not a wartime Hallow spell (lmao for those of you who know what’s coming next) they feel safe enough to both check out the stones and call over Nara and Tracker for more info. Nara says that this is where Tracker usually communes with Gal and Adaine confirms with Nara that a skilled druid or cleric could use this circle to planeshift. Adaine and Riz roll Arcana and Investigation respectively on the stones and they get an impressive 28 and a nat 20 for a 32! Brennan has to spill everything! 
Riz finds that the stones are very protected. There are all these runes and an old scorch mark. Sunk in the ground, he finds carved a wedding contract–the wedding of Cass and her mystery god partner. (Note: Brennan says that the name written is Cass even though I’d have assumed that the name would be whatever Cass’ name was previously since Cass is a name Kristen gave her but this could just be a continuity blip that we should Time Quangle handwave away. Just wanted to mention it). Riz sees the name of Sol as officiant, Ruvina and Gal as maids of honor, Cass as the bride, and then a name sunk under the earth where the other person getting married would logically be. 
Fig gets the rats who were showing hole earlier to dig deeper into the ground and persuades Tracker and Nara to not freak out (which is maaaaybe a mistake considering what’s about to happen). With all her studying, Adaine is the only one who’s able to properly read the name once the rats dig it up and in her scholarly haze, she just says it without thinking. 
Ankarna. 
A lot of things happen very quickly so we’re going to bullets. Buckle up:
The stone circle glows red. Riz can see through his spy glasses that it's filling with fiendish energy. It feels safe in the circle so everyone jumps inside. 
The BK's phones start blowing up and Ragh runs over to them, on the phone. Adaine urges him along with Aelwyn and Zayn who have shown up to get in the circle. They all try but Zayn, as a ghost, is abjured. 
Ragh is on the phone because something is wrong with the gem in his mom's chest. Adaine is instantly horrified by what she might have done  
The stone circle begins to shake and the moon glows incredibly bright.
Tracker is rightfully freaked but then she and Nara are thrown from the circle and land hard, causing them both to start bleeding profusely. Tracker starts shifting as the moon becomes full. 
Fig makes a Wis save and fails a Con save. The spectral, yellow armor appears around her and the moonlight that falls on them starts trying to rip it off, and not gently. It’s willing to kill her to abjure the curse. She takes 19 points of damage. 
Kristen’s Cass shards start glowing blindingly and Adaine sees that mirrors are appearing to deflect the moonlight and protect Fig. 
Riz gets the sense that multiple Divine Interventions are happening at once and he is first to act. His choice is to try and shove Fig into his briefcase of holding to try and protect her from the moonlight In doing so, he breaks one of the mirrors that was protecting Fig and Brennan gives anyone who wants a chance to Counterspell without the knowledge of why. Adaine, elven oracle and protective friend, takes that offer and, on a NAT 20, counterspells a god, saving Fig’s life and shattering the curse on Fig. That’s GOTTA be worth some extra credit, right? Riz, with the help action from Cass, successfully gets Fig into the briefcase and then dives in after her. Unfortunately, Baron shows up right away because Riz’s life was going just a liiiiitle too well I guess.
Fabian does an Insight check and doesn’t think he’ll be able to get Nara and Tracker back into the (supposedly safe) circle but he feels like maybe they were knocked out for their own protection. He casts Pyrotechnics to produce some smoke to help block the moonlight.
Gorgug jumps into the briefcase and casts Warding Bond on Fig. 
Adaine locks eyes with Aelwyn who says that she’s alright and can teleport them all back to Kei Lumennura easier if they’re all in the briefcase since there’s a carry limit. At that assurance, Adaine and Fabian jump in. 
Kristen looks into the chaos trying to find a trace of Cass but doesn’t find one. She does note that the mirrors which are protecting them are a symbol of Cass but specifically in her Nightmare King form which is troubling. 
Tracker yells for Kristen in concern from outside the circle. Brennan offers Kristen a chance at a free Divine Intervention roll but it fails. Kristen jumps into the briefcase but, as she does, she casts Death Ward on Aelwyn (if she goes down to 0 she’ll actually drop to 1 HP–like half orc Relentless Endurance).
There is a flash of moonlight, darkness, a roar of flame, pained gasping, and then the briefcase finally shuts.
Woof. Huge breath. Because we’re not even done!
The Bad Kids are tumbling through the pocket space of RIz’s briefcase, through photos and case files and random items and Baron is there, taunting Riz: “The Nightmare King, very angry, once more in the arms of his loving partner.” He vanishes and leaves them in their precarious predicament with the knowledge that Cass has been corrupted once more. 
The pieces of armor (Riz specifically notes that there are six) are still targeting Fig so she casts Mislead to create a doppelganger of herself with higher speed that falls faster. The armor is tricked and gloms onto the illusion which morphs into Gilear. Each bit of armor turns into something Gilear-related: a yogurt spoon, a Hawaiin shirt, sandals. Then the Gilear illusion hits the ground and shatters. They're about to hit the ground and shatter as well but then Kristen remembers her gift from Fig! She sets it in the air and, miracle of miracles, manages to make the Dex check! Between her and some fancy sheet whipping from Fabian, they’re able to set down with no damage. Where are they you might ask? Well, it’s a creepy, dilapidated version of Fig’s room in Mordred. And they don’t have time to parse what that means because the pride armor pieces turned Gilear items scatter and Brennan has everyone roll initiative! See you next time! 
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lillaskiten · 4 years
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Ok so fantasy high is definitely a new obsession because i even wrote fanfic about it. First time posting any of my writing so like, be gentle. anyway this happened because i think The Ball is a stupid nickname but the potential for drama is delicious. Also fabriz is good. The “The Ball” Thing Summary: Riz stands up for himself after it’s all over. Not everyone is thrilled. Important conversations get interjected with important shenanigans.
Despite everything, The Bad Kids were in good spirits when they stepped out of Principal Agueforts office. It had been a harrowing spring break. Between evil shadow clones, demons and beings of pure nightmare it was sure to leave its mark. Jawbone really had his work cut out for him. Adaine still wasn’t over dying for the first time. Fig also died for the first time. She’s good though.
But now they were back in Elmville, heroes once again despite multiple murders, thefts and property damages. It’s familiar and invigorating.
Gorgug took Zelda on a date as soon as they got back. It wasn’t gonna heal over night, but they were working it out. Fig planned an actual vacation for her and Gilear who, gods know how, actually made it back. Adaine, Kristen and Tracker held a celebratory welcome home party at Mordred manor to actually try to get acquainted with their new home. Riz and Fabian immediately met up with their respective mothers to barrage them with the tales of their adventure.
It was good. They were home.
Walking out of the school they couldn’t help but notice Riz walking especially upright. He smiled like he did when on the verge of a breakthrough. Stepping out into the school parking lot he stopped them with certainty that was almost certainly unfounded.
“I would like all of you to follow me to my office,” he said with a glint in his eyes.
“Uh, sure... Why?” Adaine was first to question.
“Please just come along, I happen to have an announcement!” the triumph in his voice was unmistakable.
“That you can’t tell us in the parking lot?” Kristen said.
“Of course not!” though everyone could see how he barely held whatever it was in. “It needs to be official.”
Well, it was Riz. Whatever it was it was probably important. They all shrugged and followed him down to the old office building. Wondering quietly, and in Fabian and Fig’s case; very loudly, what this announcement was about.
~
The office was cleaned and rearranged from the scuffle at the beginning of their adventure. The four who had been subjected to said scuffle walked in carefully. Fabian especially. He shuddered just thinking about nightmare-Riz.
Boggy croaked happily and Fabian felt a little better.
Real-life-Riz must’ve come here as soon as they got back. The space was impeccably clean and so clearly lived in at the same time. It looked like an IKEA display room for deranged detectives. The conspiracy board already had a new case starting to form on it and beside an old coffee cup on the desk lay the Nightmare King file, now with a big red CLOSED scribbled on top.
The Bad Kids tumbled in and filled the space in both spirit and person. At Riz’s indication they all got situated on the floor, each seemingly trying to out-weird the others in their sitting position. Well, Adaine sat prim and proper with boggy in her lap, silently confused over her friends antics. Riz stood, king of his castle, behind the desk. He filled them each a cup of black sludge that was almost coffee. Everyone but Kristen pulled a face when handed their cup.
“The Ball, will this put hair on my chest or make it fall out?” Fabian grimaced.
“Uhh, Both?” Riz waved him off. “But! That does bring me to my announcement…”
Everyone leaned forward in mild anticipation. Was it a new case? Whatever was happening on the conspiracy board? Was he and Sklonda moving? Was he an honorary detective? Was his father actually alive and in hiding and now needed their help on his most dangerous mission yet? (That last one was Figs suggestion.)
“I…” He took a deep breath.
“Wait is he like… coming out?” Kristen whispered to Adaine.
“Didn’t he already? And you think every announcement is someone coming out!” Adaine whispered back.
“Well, she’s right like 50% of the time you know?” Fig squeezed in and plopped a piece of popcorn in her mouth. at least it wasn’t a clove.
Riz paused.
“Did you bring snacks to my heartfelt moment of vulnerability?”
“Oh shit it’s gonna be heartfelt?” Fig exclaimed. “Dang, we are seriously unprepared.”
She quickly conjured a bowl of popcorn for the whole room. They descended on it like a pack of wolves.
After Adaine had broken up the coming fight and divvied the popcorn so that everyone got exactly as many as they wanted in comparison to the others (with any excess given to Boggy) Riz stood there with popcorn in his hand and a little less triumph in his voice.
“So what I was trying to say was…” He paused and looked around the room for any possible interjection. Fig looked like she still had something on her mind but a look shot her down. He coughed and tried to regain that triumphant feeling he’d been carrying all day.
This was his moment. Time to bring his character development to a head!
Boggy croaked happily. Yes, he could absolutely do this!
“I hereby relinquish my status as The Ball,” He said with grandeur, looking each of his friends in the eyes (or eye in Fabians case). “I formerly ask you all to stop calling me by that name.”
“Of course,” Gorgug and Kristen said in unison.
“That’s it?” Adaine said.
“Oh I never really liked The Ball either,” Fig said, chewing popcorn.
“WHAT?” Fabian was aghast. He had stood up and slammed his hands on the desk. “But. You. Are. The Ball.”
“Yeah well I never actually liked that nickname,” Riz said. He looked at the others behind Fabian. “I thought now, with all we’ve been through, I could tell you and still keep you as friends.”
“Of course you’re still our friend, you really thought something like that could get rid of us?” Adaine smiled softly like only she does. “It’s a stupid name anyway, the only one who actually cares is Fabian and maybe Ragh.”
“We should tell Ragh right?” Gorgug said, already on his chrystal. “I’m gonna tell Ragh.”
“Hey shh! I think we’re getting to the good part!” Fig elbowed him, pointing out Fabians red face. Then she shoved a fistful of popcorn into her mouth.
It seemed that Fig was conjuring more and more popcorn for every passing second.
Fabian was sputtering before he finally got the words out:
“But… but it’s our thing! We’re Fabian Aramais Seacaster, son of Bill Seacaster and captain of the bloodrush team, and The Ball!” he gestured wildly at himelf, then at Riz, then himself again. “What? Is the captain of the bloodrush team supposed to be best friends with some… just… not The Ball?”
The rest of the Bad Kids had quieted down, all impressed at Riz for actually hearing Fabian call him his best friend without crying. It was the fifteenth time by the way. Not that they kept count.
“Can’t our thing just be that we’re... Riz and Fabian?” Riz answered. Mostly weirded out by this harsh response.
“NO!”
“Why are you making such a big deal out of this?”
“Because… well…” Fabians mouth tried desperately to form any words to his own liking.
“What?”
And Fabian did something the others had barely ever seen before. He was quiet and thought out his next words.
For a while no one said a thing.
“Hey Fabian did Riz tell you he’s gay?” Kristen interjected into the silence.
“What?” (Fabian)
“WHAT!?” (Riz)
Riz threw daggers at her. Like a literal dagger. It struck the floorboards just short of her.
Boggy croaked happily and her heartrate lowered.
Adaine turned and elbowed her.
“What did we say about outing people for drama, Kristen?” she hissed.
“Even though it is fun it’s still very uncool,” she sighed. “But you know, this is a safe space. And like, I have a plan.”
Adaine rolled her eyes and held Boggy closer. Kristen was lovely but sometimes her impulsiveness really got the better of her. By the desk Fabian was staring at Riz, then back at Kristen, then back at Riz.
“You told Kristen but not me?” he looked actually, genuinely hurt. Which for Fabian still looked a tad like an overreaction.
He could see Riz look away. Everyone else turned awkwardly and drank their almost-coffee. The only one who seemed somewhat comfortable was Gorgug.
“Oh, uh… He told all of us actually,” Gorgug said, thinking he helped clarify the situation.
Four sets of eyes turned to glare at him with various levels of “stop talking.”
“Oh don’t you remember?” he pointed at Kristen. “You me and Adaine were talking about Asexuality, and then Fig came in and you” he pointed at Riz, whose ears were turning red under the green skin, “told us, just super casually, that you were gay and then told us to… to not… tell… uh… uh…… Traacker?” He realized his mistake too late.
Everyone looked at Fabian in horror.
“While I don’t really get why you wouldn’t want Tracker to know,” Thankfully Fabian was still thick when it counted. “I’m still hurt you didn’t tell me, I’m your Best Friend!”
“Well to be completely fair” Riz said. “I told Ragh before I told anyone here.”
Fabian looked almost as wounded as Kristen.
“He is actually very sensitive.”
Fabian looked around the room. A place of traitors. Even Ragh was a traitor and he wasn’t even here.  He didn’t feel so bad about not wanting to stop calling The Ball “The Ball” though. That was nothing important compared to this revelation.
“I’m sensitive, The Ball…” Fabian smiled. “I’m the most sensitive.”
“Ok…” Riz fixed him with a glare. “Then be sensitive to my feelings and call me Riz! It’s not that hard, you’ve done it before.”
“Well, not intentionally! And… just… you know what!” He turned dramatically. “Kristen, WHY did you decide to out my Best Friend in the middle of this, frankly inconsequential, conversation?”
Kristen almost choked on the coffee.
“Mm… You see it’s all part of my Master Plan!” She had a smug smile plastered on her face. “Our adventure is done, over, and through it, all of us have sort of grown and had revelations and just MAJOR character development. Just look at Riz! He realized he was gay and got comfortable enough to stop chasing our approval all the time…”
“I didn’t chase after your app-“
“You did.” Kristen said matter of factly. “Now he’s finally decided he’s not The Ball, he’s an adult! A man! and it’s not just him. I’m secure in Yes? now, Adaine is stepping into her role as the elven oracle and like everyone has had a sexuality and gender chat with me except you. And I want to have one really bad because I think there’s a lot that might be going on here.”
Fig paused her popcorn massacre to play the bassline for Fig and the Sig Figs newest hit “F*ck The Man And Also Being A Man Or A Woman”. It was massively popular.
“And with you…” Kristen hesitated. “Well basically you just got rejected by Aelwynn and after that got progressively sadder?”
“Wait, so your master plan is to get Fabian to talk about his feelings?” Adaine raised an eyebrow.
Kristen shrugged.
“OK!” Fabian decided to put a stop to this. “Why is THAT something we’re working through? Right. Now?”
“Because I am so sure it has something to do with the The Ball thing,” Kristen said, looking a little too excited.
“Ok, oookay,” Fabian said again. “There is no ‘ The Ball thing’.”
Which made everyone around murmur that Yes, there was clearly a “The Ball thing” and it was very weird. Fabian looked around for any ally in the room.
Boggy croaked happily.
“Why do you insist on calling me The Ball, Fabian?” Riz was done playing games. He stared down Fabian who almost shrunk under the force of it.
Fig shoved in another fistful of popcorn.
“Well maybe…” Fabian said, mentally unhinging his jaw to let it say whatever it was going to say. “Maybe it’s true that it’s our thing! And maybe I like that, and thought you liked it too. Maybe it represents our friendship? Maybe it feels like you’re taking away our whole dynamic, you know? Maybe… Maybe I can’t handle Riz?... Maybe Riz is just too close?”
Riz stood dumfounded. Everyone else shoved more popcorn in their mouths.
“Maybe I love you Riz!” He concluded, like he just figured it out himself. “Maybe I’m in love with you, maybe that’s it.”
There was a painful few seconds when Riz just stood quiet. Fabian stood still. A man who was unarmed and naked against a man with every knife sharper than his last.
Then Riz leaned in and kissed him. A quick peck on the lips while their audience erupted into giggles and celebratory shouts.
“Fabian,” Riz looked into his eyes and laughed. “I cry when you call me your best friend. Of course I’m in love with you! I’ve had a weird, sad crush on you since freshman year!”
“I can’t believe not one of the Bad Kids is cishet!” Kristen laughed. Then she shouted: “IS THIS WHAT TRUE BELONGING FEELS LIKE?”
Boggy croaked happily.
Adaine patted Riz on the back while Gorgug quietly started giving Fabian tips for their first date (which, of course, everyone else was going to hijack). Fig was already writing up lyrics for a song about them. Was “The Pirates Ball” a good title? She’d have to workshop it. Kristen felt like it was only right to commemorate this LGBT miracle by once again kissing every other Bad Kid on the mouth.
“Ok that’s it! Out! Everyone out!” Fabian started shoving the rest of them towards the door. Kristen first.
“Hey what gives this is great news!” Fig protested. “Also I’m gonna need the whole story of pining and realization and stuff to make this song really POP!”
“Nope, you’re going out!” He dragged her out by the bass.
“But whyyyy?” Fig groaned while holding on to the doorframe.
Fabian smiled like he hadn’t in weeks.
“I’m gonna get my kisses in.”
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jq37 · 5 years
Text
The Report Card – Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 2
Boggy the Froggy!
Welcome back, ya’ll! We jump back in with our Bad Kids (or 4/6 of them anyway) the very next day. Fabian sends Gilear out on a coffee run on the threat of bodily harm. His mom–who, if you remember is low-key a total badass–tells Fabian that if Gilear doesn’t come back from the quest alive, she’s going to duel him to the death on top of the house. Yikes. At Chez Thistlespring, Gorgug’s parents give him another very detailed sex talk and then remind him that he lives in a world where magic is very real so any and all dreams he remembers should be treated as omens. 
At the haunted house, Adaine wakes up having had portentous dreams like everyone else which is doubly concerning I have to imagine considering (1) she is the eleven oracle and (2) as a full elf she’s supposed to trance, not sleep and dream. Luckily for her nerves, she cast Find Familiar the night before and summoned an emotional support familiar which she gave the amazing name Bogariel Frogariel aka: Boggy the Froggy. 
Meanwhile (and I needed to switch paragraphs because Kristen is doing the D&D equivalent of playing Twister while everyone else is playing Checkers as she is wont to do) Kristen is talking to Tracker about changing Yes? again because she is filled with doubt about her god of doubt but the one thing she clearly doesn’t have doubt about is her relationship with Tracker because it’s been less than a year and she already sees wedding bells in their future. Wild. She also invites Tracker on the quest, rectifying what I thought was a wild oversight last week. 
Everyone meets up and they realize Fig and Riz are missing. They (specifically Fabian) can’t get Riz on the phone (which has never happened before) and all of Fig’s stuff is missing. They head over to Riz’s office to see if they can find him but, before that, Tracker cancels the church of Yes? because, sure. 
There are signs of a struggle at Riz’s office, but no blood. They find a picture of Riz’s super-spy dad (Pok) with his arm around someone who appears invisible to them (though the spot is circled in red). They also find claw marks going up to a mirror. Adaine stops Gorgug from touching the mirror which would have driven him insane and had him attack the group. She sees a twisted version of Riz in the mirror which no one else can see until she describes it (suspicious). Then, she dispels magic and the Riz appears in the room…and attacks them (roll for initiative baybee)!
Fabian is flipped the F out. Kristen decides to chill out and drink Riz’s coffee–much to the incredulousness of everyone else (she’s on those chill existential dread vibes). Adaine and Gorgug are stricken by fear but they’re able to snap out of it quickly. Once they’re sure it’s not Riz (the doppelganger is going full creepy horror movie monster with the head twisting and biting and junk), they start going full throttle but Kristen gets a clutch roll and lands a banishment on Nightmare Riz (who was invisible at the time). Also, Adaine finds a gun but no one is down with her packing heat without proper firearms training so she reluctantly puts it back. They confer with Sandra-Lynn and they find out Fig has, for some reason, gone to Bastion City (the capital) and Gorthalax is missing. Also, because Emily is Emily whether she’s present or not, they find out that Fig has decided to multiclass and she is now a bard/warlock with her demon dad as her patron. Those might be connected because, as her patron, Gorthalax can now find Fig at all times.  
Sklonda, in the meantime, has been investigating a robbery at the mall. They end up there too because Gilear (who is back from his coffee run) said he saw Fig’s bus in the area. They tell Ragh to meet them there and then head over (Gorgug in the old family car which he buys from them for 30 gold (the cost of a pony)–the amount Adaine suggests after the Thistlesprings reject his insane offer of 1000 gold). Also, Kristen leaves her brothers some gold secretly which is sad and also I think not the best way to handle that, but the intention is good. The robbery was of a gem–non-magical I believe–called the Devil’s Heart. [Edit: And apparently Fig’s doing.] Fabian shows up, tries to be helpful, and then eats glass. Normal stuff. 
The group tries to figure out what’s going on with Fig by calling the hotel she’s at and basically doing a straight improv comedy routine, each passing the phone around with a bad story until Adaine just hangs the phone up. Then, they find out from Sklonda that Pok’s partner is a tabaxi (cat person) named Kalina and she is in the empty space in the photo. Sklonda and Sandra-Lynn can see it even though the Bad Kids can’t. 
With that information gathered, the group leaves Elmville for the first time on the way to the Hotel Cavalier in Bastion City and, hopefully, Fig. 
Detention
Fabian for Intern Abuse
Poor Gilear. Fabian solicits increasingly complicated coffee orders from his friends to make Gilear’s job harder and tries to get them to threaten Gilear on their behalf. Even Sandra-Lynn was like, bro. Lay off the guy. Bad form, sir. (Hilarious, but bad). 
Honor Roll
Adaine for Rocking Her Portent Rolls
Adaine had a 19 and a 4 for her portent rolls this session and she used them very judiciously. The first was her 19 which she gave to Gorgug who was about to fail his saving throw and touch the mirror which would have led to him attacking everyone (she has a vision of his beheading her in a rage–sidenote love that Brennan makes her portent rolls actual visions instead of just having the mechanical effect of changing the roll happen). The second was a 4 which she gave to Brennan who was rolling for concentration on Nightmare Riz’s fear spell. What a power move to stare your DM in the face and say, “You roll a 4.” Amazing. Portent rolls are so good you guys. Also, bonus points for coming up with the name Bogariel Frogariel. 
Random Thoughts
Fabian’s response to his mom’s ultimatum that she will fight him if Gilear doesn’t return alive? “Damn, guess I have to fight my mom.”
“MAGIC IS REAL AND SO IS MY FROG.”
Brennan describes Boggy as just the most archetypal looking, round, squishy frog and I want a plush of his yesterday. Or a stress ball! It would go with his whole emotional support thing in game. I love that Siobhan picked not the potentially “useful” or “cool” animal. She went full Marie Kondo and was like, “What’s gonna spark some joy?” Boggy also can give her the help action, which is great!
The episode was great even 2 cast members down, but they were missed. On more than one occasion, I was like, “This is more quiet than usual. I wonder why–ah Emily.” We better get her reaction to Boggy as soon as she’s back.  
Kristen brings up the concept of patenting a god which is wild. We also get an answer to the question I had last week about Tracker’s cleric status–she still is a cleric of the moon goddess. The moon goddess is just chill with her followers not being exclusive. 
Fabian sans Riz is a hilarious mess. For anyone who likes them together as friends and/or romantically there was a lot of Content. Fabian being like, “Idk about Fig but something is def wrong with the Ball because he always answers on the first ring when I call  him.” Him canonically forgetting that he has a name other than The Ball (that’s the name in his phone, obv). And, the coup de grace, him investigating RIz’s office, but only for signs of his name. Him trying to Investigate like Riz, rolling a nat 1, and literally eating glass (“I thought I could taste fingerprints!”). 
“Coffee’s ordered, is the Ball dead?”
Adaine as everyone is clowning on Fabian for possibly making out with the Hangman: The Hangman is much more human than my bitch sister. 
Nightmare Riz, who they still think is actual Riz at this point, pops out of the mirror and Fabian and Adaine’s reactions respectively are, “You can’t do these things!” and, “It’s like 60% of our grade.”
The idea of Gorgug going from a terrified scream into a barbarian rage scream is very funny. Where are the animatics people?
Oh, speaking of people, Fantasy High was trending on tumblr the morning after this stream. Nice job, guys! 
The talk that Gorgug’s parents give him about all dreams being significant is something I always say in movies/books/shows like this. You have protagonists who *know* they live in a magic world and they have weird dreams and it’s not until 2/3rds of the way into the story that they’re like, “Wait. My dreams…mean something?” Bitch, what?
Gorgug’s initial coffee order is Hot Chocolate with a shot of decaf.
Everyone is very chill with Tracker coming onto the quest. Adaine just has one rule: No sex in the tent while they’re also in the tent. Kristen asks like she’s offended Adaine would feel the need to say that but like…come on. 
At first, I thought the invisibility in the photo was similar to the non-Adaine bad kids not being able to see Nightmare Riz until she described him but they still couldn’t see the woman in the photo after Sklonda described her so not sure what was going on with the mirror. 
I went back to the episode where Riz finds the photo of his dad (First Kisses and Last Words at around 1 hour, 27 mins in) and in that photo it’s of his dad and his mom. So either (1) it’s a different photo, (2) Brennan forgot/retconned something, or (3) something seriously screwy is going on. I will also note two observations here. Sklonda mentioned that Kalina doesn’t drink but was holding up her hand in a toast like she was drinking in the photo. That seems too specific a detail to not mean anything. And the second thing is, last ep, we did learn about a servant of the Nightmare King called the Shadow Cat and Kalina (if that is her real name) is a tabaxi so that’s something to think about. 
With all the complicated coffee orders flying around, Adaine just changes hers to a black coffee to try and make Gilear’s life a little easier (her original order was a Peppermint Mocha–sans the threat of violence to Gilear Fabian was offering). I do really love that Adaine seems genuinely concerned about the guy. SOMEONE should be. And it’s consistent with her characterization of just being generally well mannered and empathetic. 
Kristen getting the banishment on Nightmare Riz is something she did after Ally asked for it and Brennan was like, “lol, sure on a 19 or 20.” Boom. Rolled a 19. Just like in the prom fight. So the lesson here folks is don’t give your players a conditional yes and then expect the dice to bail you out. 
Kristen’s existential crisis is so crazy to me because she’s having, like, a prototypical Crisis of Faith™ (and pretty realistically) except, unlike in real life, she has certain knowledge about the existence of gods, life after death, and the means to communicate with those deities in the present day like…I feel like you’re crisis-ing wrong, girl. She’s crisis-ing like she just deconverted from Christianity when I feel like what actually happened is closer to, like, quitting a sorority or realizing you hate your major or changing political parties.  
the nature of humanity is just that every so often someone accidentally invents homestuck helioism again
Ragh had a dream matching up with Gorgug’s (but he didn’t realize it was Gorgug in his dream) which means something and I’m sure we’ll figure out what soon enough. 
The Fabian eating glass scene is another one where you truly need to see it to understand how great it is. Lou is equally game to have Fabian be the coolest person who ever lived or a huge baby and Fabian running away crying because he has glass shards in his tongue is incredible. Hilariously, he runs into Ragh in the food court who has also eaten glass in the past (“Glass is literally invisible.”) and they bro bond over it so hard (“That’s my boy!”) that Tracker and Kristen are like…are they a thing?
The other crazy scene is the gang passing around the phone trying to convince the hotel receptionist to give them info about Fig. Kristen comes up with the name Teddy Guyger (and Zac and I at the same time are like, “Did you get the name Teddy because you have a teddy bear in your inventory rn?”). Fabian tries to drop his dad’s name. Their first move for some reason isn’t to give the phone to Gorgug who is also a part of the band. Adaine just hangs up the phone like Peppa Pig. Exquisite comic timing. 
“I cast bane on Gilear.”
I love the running joke of Adaine having visions throughout the day of her friends in the process of doing dumb BS.
Nightmare Riz going after Fabian’s good eye was big gross. Thanks Brennan, I hate it.  
I wonder if what’s going on with Fig is completely different than what’s going on with Riz. Just because they’re gone for the same reason irl, doesn’t mean they’re gone for the same reason in game. Nightmare Fig could be a fun fight though.
As someone whose fave thing in D&D is not combat, I thought the fight in this episode was great. Interesting concept, good chance for in-character reactions, not too long . 
Ragh upon meeting Tracker: Check it out: I’m gay. (Tracker: Tight.)
Fabian, who has known Cathilda his entire life: Do maids dream?
In this ep, Kristen and Adaine rolled 2 nat 20s each (Kristen rolled one for initiative also but it was lowered by her modifier), and Gorgug and Fabian each rolled 1. Fabian also rolled a nat 1 (which, again, led to him Eating Glass).  
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jq37 · 5 years
Note
well. that was it.
**spoilers for prompocalypse  part 2**
Y'all this is it. The end-end. The last recap, at least for Fantasy High.
I honestly could have gotten this up yesterday but I wanted to give myself a hot sec before it was really over. 
But, no way out but through. Let’s get to it. 
We start back up right where we left off with no break in between. Cast still freaking, Brennan still gaping. 
“What the Fuck.” –Brennan 2019
Anyway, Kristen once again appears in corn heaven and she’s very not chill about it. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. On the plus side, she runs into Doreen in heaven who is young and hot again (which I’m sure Fig would appreciate knowing) and also apologizes for her traumatizing speech to Adaine during her death.
Helio playing beer pong. I wonder if that was always a facet of his personality or if Brennan just decided to yes-and all of Ally’s suggestions of him being a frat bro.
The angels being like, “Please be nice to God. He’s our dad,” was kinda adorable. 
“Why are you dressed like a weird stripper?”/“It’s too hot in here. He’s the sun!”
So while the gang has been living out Breakfast Club + Stranger Things, Aguefort has been Weekend and Bernie’s-ing Heaven apparently. I want to say wild, but tbh that’s pretty on brand for him. The wild part is that he was able to knock out GOD. Like, how even?
Aguefort tells Kristen that Sol is one god of many and she says, “Cool, I always thought that,” as if this is new information but, living in a D&D world, shouldn’t she definitively know that already? Like, the gods in fantasy worlds are pretty blatant about letting their presence be known and there are clerics/paladins who aren’t Heleoic but still have powers. 
OK I have a bone to pick with Ms. Kristen Applebees. You get a chance to talk to the primordial source of all divine power and magic and you (1) ask who you’re allowed to bone and (2) create a TERRIBLE god. Just truly TRASH. She created a reaction gif god. It’s not even a physical representation of the concept. Like, I thought she meant something like Yass from Wreck it Ralph 2 but no. Just a literal Yes! Like, you can trash talk Helio when you come up with something better, girl. Also, wild that you can just…walk into a room and do that. Like you have to knock out Sol first but still. Wild.
“You’ve created a new deity and already you’re fed up with it. I would say that’s par for the course.”
I low key thought Kristen was going to get the option to deify herself. I think because I had just rewatched The Gamers: Dorkness Rising and that figures in to the plot. But, thinking about it, she wouldn’t have gone for that I don’t think.
Aguefort flipping out at Kristen saying that friendship is the greatest magic of all, and rightfully so. That’s BS.
Since when does Kristen have dog tags?
Anyway, as we all suspected, the chronomancy line from episode 1 wasn’t a random line of dialogue, it was a chekhov’s gun. 
I mentioned this in an earlier post. Brennan didn’t seem too concerned that the party was wiping and I think this is why. I think he had two paths for this fight to take. In one, Riz successfully rolled for police and like 6 helpful NPCs plus his mom show up. That’s enough to beat the dragon without dying and Aguefort shows up having Die Hard-ed his way out of heaven. In the other, Kristen dies, goes to heaven, and basically that same series of events happens. Chronomancy saves the day. I think he was shocked because the roll dovetailed so perfectly with the story beat. 
“Is Arthur Aguefort black? Hell yes. My brotha.” Gonna be honest, I basically had that same reaction when they showed his character portrait in ep 1.
Kristen and Arthur jump back into the battle and Arthur gets possessed by Mr. Gibbons. I guess he’s just been hanging around as a ghost this whole time? Because this seems to lend credence to the theory that that’s who possessed Fig in the arcade but didn’t we see him go to the afterlife (which, I have a question about that too later). But I feel like that must have been Brennan’s way of sidelining him for the fight so they didn’t have like a level 20 wizard making it too easy.
“Oh, and Jawbone!” Murph loses it. 
Jawbone stuck in Goldenhoard’s mouth like that meme of the dog smiling, stuck in a fence.
Gorthalax is like, “I don’t feel great sleeping next to this dude.” Fig meanwhile is all, “I wanna sleep between his legs.” She says this at least twice. 
So everyone just have a freaking picnic and takes a nap in the middle of this fight. Can’t say I saw that coming exactly.
Fabian tries to stab Dayne, who is already dead, during the time stop.
“What the fuck do they teach you at this school?”
“Are you talking about the time thing or–”/“Yeah Gorgug! The time thing!.”
“We’re gonna kill this motherfucker, sweetie.”
I love Sklonda so much.
Jawbone is a salad guy.
OK so I know people were shipping Sklonda and Gilear and it was like, “But how would that work with the height difference?” so Brennan, the absolute madman, decides to pair her with the GIANT DEMON???
Adaine about Gilear: Cucked again.
Everyone treating the DRAGON like a JUNGLE GYM.
“It’s basically Jeb Bush’s Campaign.” Ally, with the fury of 1000 suns: EXCUSE ME?
“I bless, [Riz], your mom, and [Fabian.] Are you the only ones with vendettas?”
“I think we’re all pretty blessed.” Gorgug/Zac is so good.
Adaine, who has all the wisdom and intelligence points of the entire party at the moment: You need to stay safe because the reason that we died is that you died. 
The shot that shows everyone on the giant dragon and then the foreground fuzzes out and shows Adaine a safe distance away in the background is hilarious. 
Ice guitar pick. Sweet.
Yeah, Siobhan really shoulda got healing potions out of her jacket, not the freaking wand. Hilarious. The only thing helpful about that was it hinted he was vulnerable to frost damage which they could have guessed. 
I wonder what Brennan had in his notes about the freaking city in Adaine’s jacket. It’s wild they weren’t more curious about that.
I low key loved Emily buffing Murph the whole fight.
“Hell yes Sklonda!”
Ragh: Giving a gay pride speech./Adaine, who doesn’t want to get knocked out again: STAB HIM IN THE DICK DUDE.
And, speaking of, OWWW.
Fig shapeshifting to Dayne. The hell Emily!
And another eye gouging.
Fabian is incapable of doing a single thing without doing some ridiculous parkour stunt first. 
Kristen,not twenty minutes after Riz said it would be crazy to go inside the dragon: Can I climb inside the dragon’s mouth? (Adaine: KRISTEN!)
Gorgug saving Skonda and Riz going, “Thanks for saving my mom!” from across the room.
Brennan is narrating the epic final battle and what cool thing everyone is doing and Kristen is just being digested. 
Riz was my second choice for the coup de grace until it turned out that Kal ate his dad and then he was my first choice. Riz!!!!
What a badass moment for him. The image of him casting a shadow on the wall is super dope.
Everyone flipping off Kal as he dies.
Riz and Sklonda are making dragon casserole bay-bee! 
MURPH FAILS WITH BARDIC INSPIRATION AND BLESS AT A 12 DC.
Aguefort. What a chaos monster.
“I fucked that bird! It is my paramour!”
Hold up, hold up, hold up. Did Kristen’s freaking Yes god kick Sol out of his own freaking heaven? WHAT?
I love that what Adaine got out of this experience was, “Wait, so my powers are bullshit?”
“Everything in this world is bullshit, Ms. Abernant.” Preach.
“So is the sun just a yes now?”/“Maybe.”
Literally 6 cop NPCs. Like they all seem like they’re morons but I’m sure it would have helped!
“Fuck it dude, it’s worth asking.”
“Are you my dad?”/“I was about to ask you the very same thing.”/“What?”
“TAKE HIS EYE. CUT OUT HIS EYE. YOU WANT ME TO BITE IT OUT FOR YOU?”
Brennan really likes the word bud.
Freak the fuck out all the time and just fuck things up. 
They got their ice cream later! And Adaine says thank you to Basrar, even though he’s not even there.
Adaine as the 7 freed maidens (way to go Sandra-Lynn) are re-killing Goldenhoard: Us and them are the only good students.
Gorgug’s nat20! What a WILD time for the dice to give that to him.
“You gotta ask. I ask everyone if they’re my dad.”
Gorgug’s dad (Gorbag) has just as low an intelligence score as his son. It’s hilarious but also sweet.
THE VULTURE
I thought that Digby and WIlma just found Gorgug in the woods? Maybe I’m not remembering right. I would guess that was their version of the stork story but they straight up told him what docking was so…
“Do any other federal agents want to step to Arthur Aguefort on the grounds of his school?”
The Aguefort way!
I wonder what Sam has to say about her former BFF selling her out like that and also getting murdered.
It seems like Gorgug was put on the guest list for hell by accident (his relieved reaction was adorable) but I thought that was orc heaven?
Interesting Gorthalax still has pull in hell when he’s a high school coach now.
BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL
How did he watch the fight? Do they have pay per view in hell?
“I doubt Cathilda will end up here.”
Bill is just such a maniac. I love him so much. I wanna say I can’t believe that killing the devil dril tweet was serious but I can. It’s Bill.
Bill and Fabian having a casual convo in HELL.
Oh my God, Fabian’s mom stabbed Bill’s eye out and he proposed on the spot. No wonder Fabian is so into Aelwen. It’s in his DNA.
What a dope ship.
I can’t believe Emily tricked me into thinking that her end speech wasn’t in service to some nonsense. She held it together for so long but I should have known bc it’s EMILY.
“Young lady, I have no idea who that is and I’m telling you right now yes. I will make whoever that person is vice principal.”
Adaine: Uhhhh….we should find Zayn.
Aww, Zayn’s parents were also terrible elves. 
Unwanted Wingwoman Kristen Applebees
lol at Adaine casting Ray of Sickness on everyone suggesting she date ghost Zayne. Great callbacks to the early eps all around. 
Don’t @ me, but Adaine w/ a ghost boyfriend who also had terrible elf parents might be kinda sick.
“Tomorrow, we’re gonna start training you on how to actually swordfight.” Uhhh, I kinda love Fabian’s mom now?
She literally hasn’t been sober in 15 years. Icon.
“I didn’t know you spoke Tornado.”
Siobhan’s late season tendency to just flip things/people off is hilarious.
Wild that Adaine’s parents just legit DITCHED her that hard and she was like, f ‘em. Clean break.
“She’s helping me spread something.”
Gorgug has so many friends now!!!!!
Lol, Fabian’s whole journey has just been about becoming captain of the Owlbears.
Riz got his PI License. 
Lou and Fabian immediately being so mad at the idea of his mom (Hallariel?) getting with Gilear. Emily/Fig having an equal but opposite reaction. 
“Mama, I will kill this man.”/“I’ll kill you first, it’s not up to you.”
Sandra-Lynn gets with Jawbone. Did Brennan just roll to pair up everyone?
Also, the group is almost all related or quasi-related now. Gorthalax got with Sklonda which makes Fig and Riz sorta siblings. Gilear got with Hallariel making Fig and Fabian sorta siblings. Jawbone sorta adopted Adaine and he got with Sandra-Lynn, again making Adaine kinda siblings with Fig. Plus Fig claimed Gorgug as a sibling a lot of eps ago and if Kristen sticks with Tracker then she’ll marry into this mess. Crazy!
Fabian totally dipping on the sequel hook because he’s gonna be busy trying to break Aelwen out of jail.
I’ve been keeping up with the fanart but there was some in here I hadn’t seen and it was super dope!
I’m so glad we had the after epilogue-epilogue. It was a very nice send-off.
Adaine using her oracle authority to get Zayn back into school! She’s so good. 
Lol and she helped Basrar so he can grant other wishes. I love that this is the NPC that she decided she was going all in for.
Riz and Adaine join AV club! Idk why I love that detail.
Riz cutting off Adaine’s very good question about her jacket w/ his PI talk.
“They’re our rivals.”/“Into it.”
“Is ‘The Ball’ not your real name?” I love Fabian so much.
Zac doing Gorgug’s excited crack-y teenage voice when he’s just concentrating on that and not playing the game is so adorable. He’s just so sweet and enthusiastic and a good kid.
“Guess that tin flower worked, huh?” I cry.
I love that Gorgug’s happy ending is basically just that he has friends now. And that’s literally all he wanted starting out. 
“FIG! GO TO BARD CLASS!”
Aww, Ragh and Gorgug are friends now.
I knew it! I at some point pitched the idea of Ragh ending up with one of the AV guys so he would be w/ someone who had enough intelligence to keep him from dying and I’m 90% sure it’s somewhere on my blog but I can’t be bothered to find it right now. But anyway, he’s in the lgbt club w/ Ragh and Kristen so it’s def a possibility! 
“My bitch sister? Don’t you fucking dare.” (lol, if that happens then the group will be even more related)
Fabian considering recruiting the Cubbys for his rescue attempt of Aelwen.
“Gilear!” I love that Fig loves Gilear now but still calls him by his first name.
And that was Fantasy High! 
I have at least two more posts in the hopper: And epilogue retrospective type deal and also the official JQ37 ranking of all the adults in Fantasy High.
Thanks for sticking with me this far you guys. I can’t draw to save my life and I don’t really do fic so this is the one little way I can contribute to this thing I love so much. 
It’s been real and I’ll see you all soon for an epilogue because, no surprise, I have more things to say. 
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jq37 · 5 years
Note
sooo.... what’s the tea on the new ep? :)
**spoilers for family in flames**
I have so much to say I’m not drafting this on tumblr lest it crash and I lose a soul-crushing amount of yelling into the void.
And, I gotta say, THIS episode is the reason I haven’t posted my adult rankings list yet. THIS RIGHT HERE. I KNEW some crap was gonna go down and force me to make some HUGE adjustments.
Also, We are feeling vindicated in this house today! But let’s start from the top and work our way down.
“Raise your hands if you really care about your parents.”
Fabian having to be like, “Look, your parents suck but don’t you have siblings?” (Kristen: Ugh, I guess)
Adaine pointing out that she cares about Gorgug’s parents.
Brennan listening to them argue about what to do like he doesn’t know they’re about to be arrested for a whole ass MONTH.
Fig wanting to method act while texting the phone, pretending to be scared.
So is the arcade owner (Frank Dunford) relevant? Brennan had the name on hand. But maybe it was just him being a good worldbuilder and anticipating the question. I feel like it’s probably that because this is late in the game to be introducing new people who are super relevant.
“Gilear’s got a little knife”
I KNEW those arcade prizes were gonna be gear they could pick up! ALWAYS RAID THE ROOM. Some of that stuff might have helped in the fight. I loved the group silently reading the cards and exchanging them to whoever they thought it would help most in the background as Brennan did the ID spell.
“This has been, if I may say so, the *best* use of the identify spell.”
I love that Adaine thanks everyone, including her inanimate spells. She’s just a good person.
OK so this episode addressed a LOT of questions I had about how these literal children were getting away with all of these murders and such. Apparently, the adventuring academy kids traditionally just get away with this stuff because of Arthur’s influence and the nature of adventurers.
Adaine coming in hot with the diplomatic immunity and then remembering, oh wait, we’re at war w/ Falinel.
Fig immediately starting smoking when she gets arrested.
I love the federal agent outsider with perspective coming in and being rightfully horrified by the absolute nonsense that’s been going on the past 15 episodes.
Is Riz’s mom the only competent cop at this station? Is there a one competent adult per location rule?
Bill Seacaster Upon Learning the Bad Kids are In Jail: Did you try to escape?
“How are things going?”/“I mean bad. I’m in jail.”
Fig upon offhandedly and indirectly being called a vigilante by Sklonda: Thank you.
Emily loses it whenever anything happens in Gilear’s orbit.
Wild that Adaine decided to spontaneously call Goldenhoard considering what happened later. Like, it wasn’t a completely out of nowhere decision and it was totally logical but they could have easily overlooked that decision. 
Like, I know things happen later that make this kinda moot but I loved Goldenhoard’s conversation with Adaine in jail. “Don’t to talk to anyone without a lawyer and kill anyone you have to to get out. The school will pay for the rezzes.”/“That’s exactly what our plan was. God, I love this school.”
Although, sidenote, I feel like you can only easily rez someone within a minute? Like, I know there are other D&D spells that let you do it after a longer period of time but with the whole phoenix egg thing and the fact that they haven’t come up so far, I feel like Brennan isn’t using the in this setting for stakes reasons.
Man that whole conversation with Fig and her mom. Emily plays Fig so balls to the wall that I kinda forget sometimes that she’s actually an intelligent adult woman who knows what she’s doing with the character so I really shouldn’t be surprised with how well she stuck the emotional beats of this episode.
Gorthalax man! TyraWeWereAllRootingForYou.gif If he left, like, actually left and isn’t just held up somehow, then that’s gonna be really not great for Fig’s general psyche. 
Kristen COMPLETELY undercutting the moment by point blank asking if they had sex.
No wonder Sandra-Lynn was so worried about Fig. She was totally Fig growing up. Which, lol, she’s not even half tiefling. She was just *like that*
Oh so Gilear has always been super lame. Good to know.
Fig: I think I have mommy issues./The Rest of the Party: You have all the issues.
Fabian: You’re trying to hook up with a 25 year old adult./Fig: What do you mean trying?I’m successfully kissing him once every couple weeks. (Which, lol but also I’m glad that’s as far as it got…you know if it has to go any amount forward).
They just let Bill into the cell?????
Lou when Zac rolls a 1 for perception on Bill Secaster and he knows what’s coming: Don’t fucking do this. (Everyone else: Already trying not to lose it)
Zac’s Gorgug being contemplative and also completely wrong face is so funny to me every time.
“Why would you kill me?”/“Why would you know that?”
Who is more insane? Gorgug for suggesting him and Fabian could be twins (aren’t they different ages????) or Bill for thinking he’s so awesome he could somehow do that?
Kristen trying to help FIg distract Bill by blurting out, “Have you ever had sex?” After the conversation where he said point blank he’s slept with 100s of orc women. 
Fabian yelling at his dad is kinda undercut by continuing to call him papa in the most poncy accent.
I don’t think I’ve articulated this properly before but this episode really drove it home: Fabian and Bill have a *close* relationship but not an entirely healthy one. Like, better than Adaine and her parents by leaps and bounds but he wrestled his son in a jail cell while his friends just watched. Like, who does that?
Imagine if Riz had tried to get between Bill and Fabian. 
Also imagine being the rest of the party just sitting there, watching that go down.
“We’ve spent so much of our lives obsessed with our dads and we’ve completely ignored our moms.”/“You’re just again talking about yourself.”
I can’t believe Fig’s suggestion spell would have worked if head boss in charge fed lady hadn’t been there. Speaking of her, as soon as she showed up I knew they weren’t going to be able to shenanigan their way out of this one (which is literally the word Emily used, hilariously). I don’t think even a nat 20 would have gotten them very far. Remember last week when I said that I was sure there was going to be a prom finale but I was also pretty sure there was still a good chunk of time before prom? As soon as they got arrested and the feds showed up I was like, “Oh they are not getting out until prom for sure.”
Siobhan trying not to laugh while Emily tries a ridiculous plan that might have worked in a different episode honestly.
Ally trying to Pirates of the Carribean her way out of the jail cell.
The cops didn’t even take their stuff in a month!
“I’m glad this is in my head and no one else can hear things like this.”
I love how Fabian rolls his eyes at Adaine for thanking her spells but he always thanks the Hangman.
Realistically the Hangman would have told Fabian the plan before it happened but the way it played out was soooo good.
The return of Mr. Cubby!!!! I was hoping it would be him but man! It was still so awesome to see happen. I wonder if Brennan introduced that family specifically in case the group ever needed to be busted out of jail (a likely need).
“Laws are threats made by the dominant socioeconomic ethnic group of a given nation.”
“You guys wanna make some bacon?”
“That was on fire the whole time? You’re so brave!” Adaine likes adults who aren’t her parents so much.
Riz being like uhhhhh my mom works here.
“To the AV club!”/“It’s been months!”
OK so they took a palimpsest from Bill in this episode. That was there to tip them off that he’s up to something I’m sure, but I feel like that could also turn out to be a Chekov’s gun for next ep. I’m sure the ability to trap someone’s should would be useful in the finale.
S/O to Brennan for his excellent foreshadowing throughout the episode and honestly the whole series.
Siobhan thinking to check the trash folder of his computer was a good move, even if it didn’t end up being the right one.
OK, strap in guys. This is where things get WILD.
Siobhan’s “Oh shit!” when she got halfway down the page of Watches and Wards and then that Harry Potter sounding sting in the background.
(Before I get any further, I love that Adaine’s first thought was well that means my sister isn’t Kal Vaxis because she thinks her sister is the root of all evil).
But WOW. After all the trash talking of the old oracle, it turns out Adaine is the new eleven oracle! And she has been since EPISODE ONE. I almost thought she was gonna be *that* elven oracle because of the questions the cast was asking but nope. It is, as Zac and Siobhan put it, a The Santa Clause situation where the last one dies and someone else gets the job.
Brennan’s faint amusement as they work through that is so good.
You know what’s kinda hilarious in hindsight about that? I said before that, so far, every person Adaine has pegged as trash has ended up being trash of the highest order and an enemy of the party and of course she’s been good at predicting things! She’s the literal oracle.
Am I reading this wrong or is the Religious Studies teacher name Yolanda Badgood?
Also the sheet says “Lunchlad (Official Title)” RIP dude.
Emily low key thinking this is going to be about pay disparity between the races.
Will putting the book back retroactively get rid of anything bad currently cast in school?
Brennan going, “Nothing happens.”/“You see an upside down waste paper basket.” Is such a GM mood. I had a session once where I spent half an hour just saying, “You’re looking at the door,” in various ways.
No one knows what Goldenhoard’s name actually is and it’s the second to last episode.
I feel like Brennan must have gotten forehead/cheek kissed a lot as a child because he’s constantly having NPCs do it. 
Are elves in this setting actually immortal (barring being actually killed) or just long lived? Because Adaine talks like she’s immortal but I wasn’t sure. Anyway, newsflash Adaine. You’ve been mortal this whole campaign! Because apparently, the elven oracle always eventually dies. 
I love that Adaine finally confronted the oracle about sinking on a ship and actually ended up kinda sympathizing with her. I can’t believe this is how that running joke ends.
Fabian at the ghost of the past eleven oracle who’s imparting wisdom on Adaine: Who are you?
Ally: Can I do something weird? (Dude, when do you not?)
Ally mumbling through an inspiring spell as Murph clues in to the paperwork discrepancy that blows the plot twist wide open. And then miming the whole thing in the background as the scene goes on.
“He was mean so I thought that meant he was a good guy.” More stern than mean really but yeah! Same Murph!
You know how you know things are about to get real? When the DM starts letting you do stuff like bust down doors without even rolling for it because there are bigger fish to fry.
The 69 glyphs of binding. Nice.
But in seriousness, Kal Vaxis (apparently it’s spelled Kalvaxus but I can’t be bothered to change that in this post) was apparently trapped by Arthur and bound to work at Aguefort (as Goldenhoard) because…he’s a wildcard I guess. Sidenote, can you imagine what this season might have looked like if Arthur hadn’t died? Or was that always the plan for him to die in some way? Like to resurrect an NPC maybe if the crew hadn’t lost 2 party members.
Man when he said last ep that the girls were going back to school I thought OK that makes sense because it’s the AV computer that Biz used or maybe it’s Penelope. But I totally overlooked teachers.
OK so the binding spell specifically says “as long as I live” and Arthur is dead. So….what does that mean exactly? And this plan seems to have been in motion from before Arthur died. What does that mean? Also, if that wording means he’s freed when Arthur dies, what was Arthur thinking killing himself???? Did he need Kristen to sneak him into heaven so he could talk to Sol and do some scheming or something? AHHHHH I have so many questions.
Also in the binding is a clause about tea. Now, first of all, Arthur, bro. Come on. Second of all, a lawyer really should have looked at that. “I will drink anything you give me”? I work at a law firm. I’m a lowly first year but even I know that’s a terrible thing to put in a contract. I’m sure y'all non lawyers know that too!
Karam-Kajam (the binding spell words) kinda looks like “magic maker” backwards. That doesn’t mean anything. I just wanted y'all to know I was freeze framing every thing that might be a clue.
OK ok ok, so I’ve been saying for a while now (in posts but mainly over chat) that all this bad stuff must be like connected to a central person in service of a central goal but the players were probably all unconnected wild cards acting in self interest. The one thing I couldn’t quite put together was what because these plots have been mainly unconnected. But now, we have it! All the weird things starting a war (by manipulating the harvestmen), getting 7 maidens (by manipulating Biz), and reinstating prom king/queen (by manipulating (?) Penelope and Dayne, also yes! my wild card guess was that prom king/queen was going to be part of a spell or curse or something. Guess it was prophecy but yes! vindication!) are parts of a prophecy on how to bring back Kalvaxis! (Along with him getting his “glittering treasure”?)
But yeah! No wonder it was so hard to put the pieces together! They all connected but only through a prophecy. Good job Bren!
“The sun shall fall from the heavens” is part of the prophecy which makes me think Sol or Helios might be involved in this somehow.
Ally: There are definitely going to be 7 virgins at prom. (That deserved a rim shot).
Good on Murph for making sure none of them were on the virgin list bc that would have been a pain in the ass to find out mid-fight. Also, I KNEW “Where are their bodies” was the question to ask last ep when Biz said they were going back to their bodies.
“Who told you that? An oracle?”
I hope Adaine just uses her oracle status to make sick one liners like, “I predict this is gonna hurt,” before she witchbolts someone. She never does her actual job. 
Adaine who hates her family, righteously indignant: Between our houses and the world, you expect us to choose our houses?
The rest of the group who loves their family: BYEEEEE.
Well, no. Kristen also had reservations before she remembered her brothers existed.
Adaine texting her mom: You should probably leave.
Siobahn and Ally fistbumping over their mutual not caring about their parents.
OK so what’s up with the rat? What’s so important about the rat? And what’s up with Zayne? We still haven’t figured out what’s up with him.
Still not clear on if the crystals trap your physical body or just your spirit and leave your physical body dormant irl.
So that’s how they got rid of the adults for the fight. Nice job again Brennan.
As far as I can tell, Brennan made up this usage of the word palimpsest and I’d never heard of the word before and now I type it so much. Wild.
“I’m calling an Uber. You use the minute to go look at as much shit as you can. Jump in the Uber with me, come to my house. Look Rudolpho will be here in two minutes in a Honda Civic. Use one of those minutes. Go.”
A Knight to Remember. 
They freaking Chitty Chitty Bang Bang to Kristen’s house.
I love how Uber Drivers in this world are still gunning for 5 stars.
OK, time for the most stressful 30 minutes of Fantasy High (so far).
I think the wagering mechanic Brennan used for the fights was brilliant. For each conflict a d20 was rolled. 1-6=epic fail. 7-14=bad but not awful. 15-20=favorable outcome. The twist was that if the person chose to help their family they could give up half their HP and 14 spell levels and he would roll with advantage.
Everyone quickly took that deal except Adaine who truly does not give a damn about her family (and also, reasonably, thought that they wouldn’t even be at home. Idk why they apparently were tbh).
When Emily said, “She’s a complex person and she’s allowed to be,” that was the moment I was like, “Oh yeah. She’s not actually Fig. IRL she knows what’s happening.”
Siobhan uses her divination roll of 18 to save Kristen’s family without having to risk anything but the Ally turns around and decides to take the deal to try and save Adaine’s family WHEN ADAINE DOESN’T EVEN CARE. But it makes sense that Kristen would.
Lou’s monolog as Brennan rolls about how nerve wracking and terrible it is to have no idea what’s going on.
“This is the worst thing I’ve been a part of.”
“I was wondering why my mom visited me and humanized herself and this is exactly why.”
Lou/Fabian: What if my fucking family dies? (F O R E S H A D O W I N G, albeit unknowingly)
Brennan (sagely): It couldn’t have been any other way./Siobhan: It could’ve been!
lol at Adaine trying to trigger that ice cream later wish at their darkest moment (so far). Also, not that I think Brennan ever forgot about it but now I’m for sure it’s gonna come up next ep bc if nothing else that would have reminded him.
OK first up, Fig and her mom.
“Dang they’re already organized with costumes?”
That was so boss, her mom getting revived and then IMMEDIATELY shooting two guys w/ her bow.
Emily LEGIT crying through that scene. The whole room was on an emotional tightrope. You can tell.
Where in the mountains Sandra-Lynn!? I want specifics Sandra-Lynn!!
I love the idea of her jumping out of a window onto a dope griffin’s back. Fig’s mom just bought herself a bunch of spots on my grown-up rankings list.
Ally: THAT WAS NUMBER ONE
Me: SAME.
Next Riz at Strongtower
I knew Sklonda was going to be in the secret room!
I love that apparently Riz can recognize his mom’s gun by hearing it.
I know it was in the promo but Riz’s mom being like, “I was so scared you were gonna ask me to prom” was hysterical.
You just know Sklonda and Agent Angela have been fighting like cats and dogs this past month.
Riz and his mom high fiving. They have the best relationship.
Gorgug and the Thistlesprings
lol, looks like his parents had the easiest time wrecking their intruders.
But based on how it was described as compared to everyone else (bar Fabian–we’re getting there), it sounds like he got pretty dang hurt.
And I guess they have a tank (which they usually use to mow the lawn) and a bomb chest? Wild.
Anyway, if anything had happened to them insert Rosa B99 meme.
“You come to the tree, you better be ready to never fucking leave, you understand?” So boss. (Also, is that a pun?)
Gorgug’s parents launched a satellite while Gorgug was in jail.
Kristen and co.
Kristen’s dad (who is the worst): You think these guys were illegals, what?
Kristen: I’m gonna take the car, byeeee.
Kristen and Adaine bonding over their terrible parents.
I’m Concerned about Kristen’s brothers.
Abernants
They poofed out. Idk why they were still there to begin with.
So the damage they took was supposed to represent the danger the took in their respective fights. Kristen got Adaine’s divination roll meaning her family was fine either way but she did take damage for Adaine’s family. But the fight was already over by the time they got there. So, in story, any injuries sustained must have been from the fight at her house, even though that wasn’t technically the deal.
Anyway, Adaine doesn’t care about her family so let’s not waste any time moving onto
Seacaster manor
Geez
OK, you guys. Let me tell you my buildup to the realization that Bill had to die.
In the first set of episodes, when tone was established, I said to myself, a parent is going to die. I don’t know who, but someone will.
Then, Bill gave them a training montage and I thought, curse of the mentor. He’s going to die. Besides, he’s one of the biggest parental figures and he’s larger than life–perfect for a fall.
Then Sklonda took down the Harvestmen and I briefly shifted my worry to her.
But then Fabian started clashing with Bill. And I remembered all the constant talk of his mortality.
And then, this ep, Brennan made him choose between his mom and dad and I was pretty sure. (sidenote: Fabian yelling at his mom the same ep Adaine said he has a great relationship with his mom. But, like, compared to her, maybe. Also, mean Brennan.)
And then Fabian lost an eye (with a description that still makes me wince) and I KNEW. Once he lost his eye, there was no way Bill could leave the fight alive, thematically.
Honestly, it was a wrap when Fabian played the video from his dad. I was worried he’d die before he got there. 
(It was a low blow, and I credit you that.)
Why were there Harvestmen attacking Fabian’s house and no one elses?
Fabian’s mom just drinking while the house is being raided.
I was so sure the tuxed Harvestman who attacked Fabian was going to turn out to somehow be Daybreak or something. Anyway, it has to come up again. There’s no reason for that level of detail otherwise. And tux sounds like prom attire.
Lou rolls a nat 1 and then rerolls it because he has the lucky trait. What’s funny is just started listening to NADNDPod and Murph (who reminded Lou about the lucky thing) disallowed one of his players from rerolling a nat 1 even w/ the lucky in the last ep I listened to. I don’t remember if the circumstances were different though.
Bill handcuffing himself up to keep fighting. Yikes.
Anyway, ugh that whole death scene. I would write more but this is closing in on 4k words and I’ve been working on this for hours. I just wanna say, that was a perfect way to go out for him. Killing 60 people and then getting stabbed by his son and exploding. So baller (as was Fabian jumping out the window onto his bike and catching Bill’s sword. He has so many cool swords now).
It’s a crime no one does animatics for this show.
We also got a piece of the puzzle. Bill was the one supplying the palimpsests (or at least one of the ones. who was doing it before?) not for an evil reason. Just a chaotic neutral reason of wanting to recapture the glory days. So now we know that.
I mentioned this before but…Fabian is Thor.
“I SHALL LEAP INTO HELL AND KILL THE DEVIL HIMSELF” and Bill Seacaster is dril apparently.
I love Fabian destroying the nice thing Bill said about him to preserve his legacy.
Ally: HE COULD HAVE SURVIVED.
I appreciate so much that Lou knew his character so well that without any hesitation he stabbed Bill and that was the right choice.
Whew, that was a lot.
Also, not that I don’t trust Brennan but it’s wild that Bill, the most thematically appropriate parent to die, was the only one who failed his roll apparently. 
Aww at Zelda’s message to Gorgug. She made him a playlist! So 80’s high school. It gives him a bonus! Also I really wanna know what’s on the list. Like, is it all fantasy rock puns or actual songs? Yay for Brennan giving them cool items for good RPing. 
Live band. Nice.
Emily and Zac both rolled 20’s for initiative for next week’s fight. Hopefully that’s a good omen. We have no way of knowing because THERE’S NO PROMO FOR NEXT WEEK.
AHHHHHHHHHHHH
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
This isn’t edited. This is more than 4000 words. This is so long my computer is about to die. Thank you and goodnight. 
56 notes · View notes
jq37 · 5 years
Note
Ok last one. What's the tea on Prompocalypse?
So...that was something, huh?
This is gonna be quick and dirty (relatively speaking, it’s still too long already as I come back and make this edit) because I have work tomorrow and there are def stuff I want to talk about more and I will (esp if I get asks) but I have work in the morning so let’s just get some words onto the screen aight.
The episode titles have had a pretty consistent naming scheme up until this point so the one word, non alliterative title had me at a 7 on the foreboding scale before we even started.
Everyone was in prom wear! And lol, Siobhan is the only one in a dress. That's almost exactly what I pictured Adaine wearing to prom. That exact shade of blue-green. And Emily looks like a waiter. 
I wonder what Bren's plan was for if they'd thwarted the crowning entirely. Got baller initiative, some nat 20's on crown keepaway and smashing, and killed Penelope/Dayne before the bad guys could finish them. Would he just try to crown someone else or would the curb stompage have stood? Not that Goldenhoard would have been a pushover I imagine but jeez. He couldn't have been as strong as his true form.
Sidenote: One of my favorite little character things is Zac and Siobhan helping each other do math.
Fig dimension dooring Gorgug to the stage and then skateboarding away. Amazing.
"I'm going for her crown vs. his crown."/"In this climate?"
OK, shoutout to Zac fo asking for those bombs because they are OP as hell. 
I love how they just charged in and started trying to kill people, no questions asked, no explaining themselves to the other students, just bombs out immediately. 
My man Riz just couldn't catch a break. I understand the out of story reason the police haven't shown up is that Murph was rolling garbage, but what's taking them so long in story? Where? Is? Sklonda?
"I'm going to jump on the back of the Hangman."/”Presumptuous."
But also, by the end of the fight he's just like, "Do anything any party member tells you to!"
Lou losing it over Riz claiming best friend status. But damn, they kinda are the closest to each other in the party. Wild. 
"You know what baby girl? Why don't you ready an action until I get there," said Siobahn to Ally, hilariously for a number of reasons. 
They keep saying Teen Wolf and I have no idea what part of the movie they're referring to. This is the second ep in a row.
Lou trying to recruit a super sad Ragh.
They started off this fight really strong. Doing double digit damage and rolling over 20s. I was like, "Damn, they've leveled up. They're doing great!" Of course, we were still in the first third of the ep so I didn't know where we were going. But Lou was right. "Wild first turn."
"And then I shoot him."
I'm half convinced Riz jinxed everyone by saying, "Remember the corn fight?"
Kristen cast ONE spell and then said, "I don't have a lot of spells left." THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU TRY AND SAVE ADAINE'S WORTHLESS FAMILY. YOU ARE THE HEALER. YOU NEED ALL YOUR SPELLS.
The students running to get food on the way out. Mood.
They messed Dayne *up*. This was the high point of the battle, objective-wise.
Sidenote, why would Dayne have needed to be at the Seacaster Manor raid? It feels dumb to ris him when he was such an important part of things. Was it literally just because he didn't like Fabian? And he disliked him enough to try and kill his parents? Yeesh.
Kirsten @ Ragh flipping out over Dayne: I see what's going on here.
Ragh really made this fight harder than it had to be. If Gorgug hadn't been grappled before Penelope got the crown they might have had a fighting chance.
So Penelope just straight up let what's her face (Sam I think) get palimpsested? Major yikes. Like I know it's a good thing they killed her but I kinda wish they hadn't so we could learn exactly what the insane thought process was there. She comes off as crazier than Biz because Biz was trapping girls he didn't respect, not his actual friends, you know? Like, did Goldenhoard say he was gonna make her an actual queen or something? Because all this isn't worth just being prom queen.
"Sometimes you make a villain and they die in the first two rounds," said Brennan, as if he didn't know what he was about to unleash on the party. Geez, I don't know how long they would have survived if Penelope and Dayne had been in play for a large chunk of the fight.
Murph's idea to blind him was a good one.
I almost was like, "Thank God Gorthalax got kidnapped," because that was the only good explanation for him seemingly ditching Fig.
Ally: Was that his best friend? (Emily: What./Siobahn: NO.)
"I'm like an advertisement for chicken."/"What chicken adverts are you watching?"/"It's like if you went to prom and there was a dangling chicken leg."/"What prom did you go to?"
Fabian full on clocking Penelope in the face like he's playing Punch Out.
"I killed my father today. Yes."
"This is against the rules but I don't care." In hindsight, this feels like foreshadowing.
"Well, that's the risk you take when you go to Aguefort Adventuring Academy."
"Get on the fucking right team!"
Lou (a la Gimli): And *my* D6.
Brennan pulling out that GIANT final form Goldenhoard figure.
For some reason, it didn't occur to me that he'd be just a legit dragon in his true form. I was picturing like the lich from Adventure Time or something.
Also, I was kinda expecting him to "Drop the act," and majorly change in personality but he was basically the same. Just a dick.
Gorgug rolls a 4. Brennan pauses for a second. The entire party: No.
Zac goes all in every time no matter how dumb it is. I love him.
"Father, stop this."/"What?"
"Not clever enough for the library and not brave enough for the world." Oww, I felt that one. Did Brennan have that waiting to use or did he come up with it on the spot because that was brutal.
Goldenhoard goes through the whole party, trying to hit their weakest point and he gets what might have been a great hit on Fig (You're so unloveable your father would rather go to hell than stay with you.) but she just says, "You have got to stop flirting with me," and completely diffuses the moment. As unflappable as Brennan is, he had to take a sec to jump back into the insult parade after that.
"I'm going to eat you."/"OH MY GOD."/"I'm not making it sexual!"
"*The* ball, bitch."
OK, I was wondering what the deal was with Riz's dad. Because giving him that gun implies a chance to kill his dad's killer but I didn't think it could be Goldenhoard directly because of the binding. That's another point towards Riz being the one to finish him off.
Wild that they weren't able to get any of the kids (save Ragh eventually) to help them with the fight. You go to adventuring school! Cowards! You would never make it at Sunnydale and that school was mostly normals!
The one dude still just getting food while Goldenhoard has turned into a full on dragon.
When an 18 wasn't a high enough roll for Fig to make her fear check, that's when I realized my earlier apprehension wasn't misplaced. I mean, maybe it should have been when he turned into a dragon but it is what it is.
But Fig skating away and then going, "Just kidding bitch," because she got it on the very next turn was hilarious.
Kristen still not being 100% on whether Ragh is gay or not.
Who was gonna kick Ragh off the team for being gay? Maybe Daybreak would have but Gorthalax def wouldn't have. Maybe he means he would have been bullied off?
Siobahn to Kristen/Ally: Stop outing students.
I can't believe Gorgug had to kiss Ragh in the middle of this fight to get his head in the game.
Also, I didn't get into it before because I knew this scene was coming but poor Ragh. Like, I could have told him things were gonna go this way and he's a big dummy for thinking otherwise, but poor dude. And then he finally gets it together and he gets wrecked.
"EMILY, I SOMETIMES CAN'T TELL WHEN YOU'RE REALLY FUCKING WITH ME OR NOT."
Siobhan doing the D&D equivalent of reminding the teacher they had homework.
The amount of dice that Brennan rolled for Goldenhoard was truly horrifying. That's permadeath damage.
AND HE GOT THE HEALER DOWN FIRST. This was the next moment I started sensing a TPK.
"HOMOPHOBE!"/"You hit both of the gay ones!"
Kristen taking damage from Goldenhoard's libertarian speech.
I find it such a Fig move to be like, "Can I use charm person to snap Adaine out of it," instead of the spell actually made for that purpose. 
Rolling low perception and getting no information is the worst because then it's like...OK I know something's out there but what dammit?
When Brennan said Fig would have to do opposed athletics against Adaine, that was the first time I was like, "Oh thank God she's so weak."
Murph forgetting to uncanny dodge until midway through the ep was uncharacteristic. Really shows how wild the fight was. 
"This kid likes to get his ass beat to a soundtrack."
Fabian refusing to just use the stairs like a normal person. 
Penelope going, "What's your deal?" like she's not helping an evil dragon who wants to rule the world. 
JAWBONE
JAWBONE JAWBONE JAWBONE
My man Jawbone shot way up on the list of cool adults today.
For real, the scene with Jawbone and Adaine was my second favorite moment of the episode and it would have been my favorite if not for a bit of divine intervention later. 
I already made a post about this but Jawbone notices Adaine flipping the hell out and he asks her if she has panic attacks and if her parents gave her any meds for it. She responds in, like, the smallest, most broken and defeated voice with a tiny head shake, "My parents just left and I don't know where they are." Gah, my heart. She was half crying. I was half awake and being kicked in the face with the full force of human emotion. It was a lot. I felt like I was a kid watching that one scene from Fresh Prince again but British-er. She gets that her parents suck and she hates them but she's 14. Everyone wants their parents to love them. It's like in our DNA.
And then Jawbone launches into the wildest motivational speech ever (including all of Kristen's, which is saying a lot) which starts with him sucking off a border patrol agent. (You understand me?/No!)
Ally, MVP of Terrible Speeches: *That* was the point?
Siobhan trying not to crack up and break character throughout that whole scene was great.
I love that Brennan was clearly trying to not encourage people to mess with their med dosage irl because he was very specific about that but also he was like, "A dragon is about to end the world so please shotgun this bottle of magic Xanax and hop on that bike."
I love that Adaine has all the magic stuff in her inventory and then also Xanax.
Aww, Jawbone offered to let her live with him because her house burned down. (I guess that info was on the news?)
And then Adaine rolls a 20 with the help from her meds (and buffs) right away! It's great when the dice cooperate.
"I came here to FUCK SHIT UP. And help children."
"Jawbone rules. I'm so glad we helped him get his life together."
Jawbone is such a sketch person but such a good counselor.
Siobhan calling Goldenhoard and absolute fucking unit sayed be at 5 in the morning when I watched this.
"I AM A CHILD. YOU ARE ATTACKING A BUNCH OF CHILDREN YOU COWARD."
"Then why is your dick out?" Adaine joining in Fig w/ the taunting Goldenhoard via accusations of flirting. 
"Why are you guys partially singed?"/"Because he's been attacking us Dad! Also Dad, he kind of used to come on to me all the time."
"Play the drums more and we'll have a full band on stage!"/"...Instead."
"You ruined prom!"/"I RUINED PROM?"
At this point I was thinking, "Geez, there's not a lot of episode left and Penelope isn't even dead yet. How could they possibly defeat Goldenhoard AND have time for tying up loose ends?" TPK vibes increase.
Adaine getting a nat 20 on Arcana, "Yeah it is what it is. You're screwed."
Hell yeah for Adaine giving Goldenhoard her low divination roll to ensure her lightning bolt hit. Not that it ended up mattering that much but still. Sick.
"Well you could have told me before this very moment!"/"I was dead!"
I just checked on the stats of an an adult red dragon in 5E and it's got 256 HP. 256! And look at the other stats! They're wild.
"This is the number of dice?"/"Yeah."/"God."
Fig goes down. Their secondary healer. So, not good. Very not good.
Brennan letting Emily burn Goldenhoard's tie as she passes out because Emily refuses to do nothing.
And Riz goes down too! The one with the med kit! At this point I was like, there is no way this can end well.
"How far away is the hospital?" I love it when they try just normal solutions in this magic game like calling their parents and going to the hospital.
It is an hour and 47 minutes into the episode before Adaine remembers she's wearing a magic coat that can make her anything (within reason). Which, to be fair, it took me a little bit too but, in my defense, I'm not staring at her character sheet.
Real talk, I didn't think she was gonna get anything from the jacket from that ask. Something to beat Kalvaxis is such a big ask.
When Brennan started going into the jacket stuff I was like, this is a really weird deus ex machina if that's what this is. But also, the kids have been hilariously chill with just having Adaine walk around in a jacket filled with people.
There was a lot to unpack there and I'll got to it in another post but I can't do another 4k epic this week y'all. I have work in the morning.
Adaine yelling for Basrar to get them their ice cream before they freaking die.
Aww Gorthalax tried to heal Fig instead of attacking.
"Daddy that was a waste of a turn."
Gorgug who has a million hit points went down and all the healers are down. There are less than ten minutes left in the episode. TPK for sure, I'm thinking.
Adaine flipping people off with a vengeance today.
Also the fact that she totally forgot that she could ask for a healing potion which is totally a thing that she almost def would have been able to get is hilarious. I mean it wouldn't have been as funny if the episode ended differently but, as it stands, hilarious.
"Does the Hangman know medicine?"
"What about this student? Is he studying to be a cleric?"
Adaine is down. That's everyone down but Fabian. Three and a half minutes left. And that's when I realize. There's not enough time for a good ending, but there's not enough time for a bad ending either. But there's no S2. This is an anthology series. What's going on here my sleepy 6am brain is saying.
Fig giving her dad bardic inspiration while passed out because Emily is Emily.
Everyone (exceptt Riz) was making their saves. I'm thinking, "Is next season different characters, same setting. Maybe a bunch of years in the future? Legacy characters?" I'm trying to put together the fact that this is the finale with 2 minutes left with the fact that they're playing different characters next season. The pieces aren't fitting. 
And that's because I couldn't have predicted what was about to happen.
Ally, clearly joking says, "Can I roll for a nat 20 and just be alive?"
Brennan, barely thinking, says, "Sure, go for it," as casually as if he was okaying a perception check.
Murph and Lou are cracking up at the absurdity of the ask. 
Ally says, "This is to the corn god," half solem, half smiling.
Siobhan holds her hand over the dice like she's blessing them.
"I know I left for a while," Ally starts as the dice are cast and...
"NAT 20 MOTHERFUCKER!"
Everyone goes WILD.
Ally punches air.
Brennan looks like someone slapped him.
Emily: You have to rip up your comparative world religions book.
BONUS EPISODE UNLOCKED
And what did we learn today? A 5 percent chance is small, but not insignificant. 
OK, there’s one thing I want to address before I tap out for the night (and it’s not spell checking. I’ll do that in the morning).
I saw some people discussing the possibility that they faked the ending. Like, they just edited it like that to give them another chance because they were all about to die. Beyond the fact that I just trust them to not have done that, the other big reason I don’t think that’s likely is because there was a much more seamless way of stacking the deck in their favor. Brennan could have had Adaine pull literally anything out of her jacket. And I truly mean anything because this is a finale. Even if he gave her something game breaking, it wouldn’t have set a precedent because it’s the last ep. And that’s beyond all the NPCs that could plausibly have come in because they know something is up and teleportation is a thing in this world. Nah, I think that was just good, old fashioned, luck of the roll and thank Helio because they needed it.
OK, that’s it for now! Join me at some point between now and next ep to unpack this because it’s a lot and apparently we have another episode to get through. Hoot growl baby!
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jq37 · 5 years
Note
oh my GOD the new ep!!!! like!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH happened but then also the preview for the next ep looks SO GOOD
**spoilers for first kisses and last words**
Hoo boy this was, as I predicted, a BIG one. Not that I needed to be an oracle to figure that out since there’s only a few eps left but man did it deliver.
I still think that Cool Kids, Cold Case had the most off the wall nonsense happening in the shortest period of time but this ep I think was overall the most consistently wild ep.
So let’s take it from the top.
I think I forgot to mention it before but Adaine’s, “I go into a rage,” hardcore cracked me up.
“I have hold person.”/”I stuff a sock in her mouth.” Insult to injury Adaine. 
The entire group dunking on Aelwen, forgetting that Riz is literally bleeding out, half dead.
“sausage festival” 
Adaine really was dead serious about her snitching threat huh?
Ally miming a boom mic.
I love how everyone including Siobhan mess up Aelwen’s name or mix it up with Adaine’s half the time.
And speaking of, wow. What a rise and fall for her in 3 eps (and about an hour in game time). She’s queen of the nerds. She’s not even cool at her own school. And terrified of whoever she made whatever shady deal with. I know she literally tried to kill the whole party last ep and that she’s the worst but I almost feel for her.
Almost.
“This is not on you. This is on the world within which you inhabit.”
I love Adaine’s semi-indigent, “We’re not going to kill you,” because Alwen was 100% ready to murder them which, side note, imagine how much on an international incident that would have been.
Lol at the group tag team bullying Aelwen about going to Mumple and Adaine using her magic jacket for super petty BS.
“Hey mom!”/”GodDAMMIT honey.”
The parent/kid relationships are so good in this show.
Everyone but Kristen parkouring off the roof when Sklonda specifically set up a ladder. 
“The put a girl in a palimpsest,” followed immediately by, “She went to a party,” as if those are on the same level.
Sklonda Gukgak DUNKING Aelwen into the squad car with a technical assist from Adaine. I knew she was gonna be my fave parent from her intro scene and I love her even more than I thought.
“With all due respect, (A/N: Which is none), suck my dick, fuck you.”
“She tried to murder me.”/”BE THAT AS IT IS.”
“Eh, you carry a gun.”
“No one who’s detecting maidens is a maiden.”
I feel like I’m quoting a lot today but there were so many money lines this episode. 
Everyone always loses it when Brennan starts doing the Identify spell voice and I love it. 
Adaine’s dad is T R A S H
Adaine’s mom on the other hand…I’ve been wondering about her for a little while because usually the outright emotional abuse has been from her dad while her mom is either not there or not saying anything. So I’ve been wondering was her deal is and we finally got the start of an answer. I know we only have a few eps left but I hope we go a little deeper into what exactly is going on there. It seems like Adaine’s parents are gonna be a big factor in whatever endgame is planned so fingers crossed,
Everyone cracking up as Emily backs Fig into a corner talking to Penelope. 
I love Gorgug so freaking much. Just his good natured, lumbering self. EVery time Zac opens his mouth gold falls out. 
Emily MAXED out her deception huh?
I think Siobhan must have forgotten that she took the crystal with Ostentasia away from Aelwen at the end of last ep. Either that or they willingly gave it to the cops and I forgot (but I think it’s the former because she said in this ep that it was in Aelwen’s pocket when at the end of the last ep she def took it).
My autocorrect keeps wanting me to type Ellen for Aelwen. I WISH.
I knew it! He’s a PIRATE. Suck it Fabian. (lol at Adaine stirring the pot. That was like Adaine being sincerely polite and Siobhan trying to cause problems and I love mixed motive player/character decisions). 
I wonder if the banker is named after John Hughes. 
I can’t believe the dumb bank is actually a huge plot point.
Yikes, re: Bill and Fabian. That got tense. Though I’ve kinda been waiting for some kind of blowout for a while. His dad runs very hot and cold and I figured it would only be a matter of time before we saw some of the cold.
Also, Lou breaking character in the middle of that very intense moment to clarify a plot point. 
Sidenote: For a hot sec after reading the title of the ep and remembering how Sklonda is competent to the point of (probably) breaking the original plot, I was so concerned she was gonna eat it this ep. So glad she didn’t.
Anyway, the idea of swinging sadly on a rope is so freaking funny.
Fig: Can I offer you a sad song in this trying time?
Huge portrait of Bill Seacaster in Fabian’s room. 
Adaine is gonna bring up him kissing her sister very time she needs to get out of something w/ Fabian for the rest of her immortal life. 
Another sidenote: This is a little thing but I always think it’s interesting when fantasy worlds have the same months and days as us when they’re named after like Norse Gods and Roman statesmen that wouldn’t exist in their world. Same with Roman numerals and Irish coffee. 
“Am I allowed to smoke in here?”/”Of course.”
I really like the character detail that Adaine is always really polite to everyone, including/especially people like Fabian’s maid and Basrar. People that she wouldn’t necessarily “have to” be polite to, you know? It’s like she’s trying to make up for the fact that her family is a bag of dicks. 
“Fantasy Google”
The whole bit with Fabian’s porn stash was so good. This group is so good w/ yes-adning each other.
“Privateer me a new one.” Emily is so good.
“Special investment” Suspicious  
I was thinking “I can’t believe looking at a bank’s FAQs is part of this game,” right as Brennan said it.
So I went back and watched Siobhan’s face from when Emily first mentioned Kal Vaxis to when she got the connection to KVX and it took her 22 seconds. I also missed the quick cut to Brennan when Gorgug asks, “What is Kal Vaxis,” and you can tell he knows they’re so close to breaking it with the little grin on his face. I wish we had gotten a reaction shot right after she got it. Anyway, great team solve w/ the MVP trophy to Siobhan/Adaine. 
I loved when Zac, Emily, and Siobhan all whipped out their laminated maps in tandem to figure out what was happening. 
The hard mood change from Adaine dropping the bomb about Riz’s dad and to forming a committee to help Gorgug flirt with Zelda was wild.
Kristen telling anyone to be suave is hysterical. 
What a DISASTER of a committee Gorgug’s friends are. Well meaning but so trash
Fig: Tell her you got a SICK tattoo
Adaine: Bring her to see art in the middle of the night
Fabian: You cannot date this person (Kristen: You absolutely have to)
Kristen: Actually not garbage advice but she is in no position to be giving dating advice to anyone 
Riz: Having a literal existential crisis 
“Who else is he gonna date?” WOW, savage Adaine.
I meant to say this before but I love how Adaine’s go-to is immediately ice cream and she’s always on board to go to Basrar’s. Like how when she texted everyone 2 eps ago she was like, “Let’s get ice cream now.”
Mmm, don’t love that Gorthalax isn’t answering his phone. I have been waiting for a significant adult to die for a while now.
OK, look, the whole thing about Penelope and Dayne being eternal prom king/queen. Is it wild? Yes. Is it implausible? No. No it’s not. Even Murph, most veteran player, was kind of like, “Wait, does that make sense?” Because, in this setting, it kind of would? I’m not sure it fits within the story so far and I’d have to go back and listen to the more lore-y stuff again but the conceit itself is like the exact right amount of crazy to fit in this setting? And they never cut to Brennan like I wanted so I could judge his face for any kind of tell. But anyway, you guys know I’ve been predicting a prom finale and this would fit right into a prom finale. 
The girls giving Gorgug a pep talk before his date was ADORABLE. 
Gorgug having to check his phone to remember three words, “You look nice.”
“Your friends are popular and loud” True
Zelda’s a BARBARIAN! She’s a MEGA BARBARIAN! 
I know they mean ecstasy like intense emotion but I kept thinking, like, molly.
Hmm, so Penelope wanted to know if Zelda had hooked up w/ Gorgug, ie: if she was a maiden. Can they only palimpsest maidens? Or (as we will get to later) does nice guy Biz only want virginal maidens for his creepy reverse Weird Science arcade setup?
Zelda listing off every type of metal and then Gorgug’s, “Same stuff,” was perfect comic timing on Zac’s part.
Imagine the Hangman screaming down the road on fire, Zelda completely terrified. 
I love the Hangman so freaking much.
“DO NOT GIVE TREATS TO MY MOTORCYCLE.”
I can’t believe everyone is living at the freaking crappy apartments. I knew they were all gonna end up hanging at one persons’ house but I kinda figured it would be Fabian’s house or Gorgug’s house. 
I”m also concerned about Bill. I feel like we keep getting reminded that he’s mortal a LOT.
Did Gorgug’s parents have indoor fireworks on tap for Gorgug’s first date?
Oh my God the whole docking conversation. Never play chicken with Brennan because the dude will not blink.
“We didn’t do that.” That’s his other best comic timing moment of the ep.
“Polishing my axe”
Kristen this episode 
I really wish they’d made the roll to find Ragh later in the ep. Fig is so ride or die for Gilear now and I love it.
“I fall asleep.”
Adaine almost making her parents dunk on Gilear but then pulling back.
But also, Adaine and Gilear going off the the oracle together.
“Fig pack it in.”
Affirmations with Fig and Gilear.
Fig, do you really think platonically cuddling with Kristen is the move?
Riz setting himself up for a dramatic entrance is so fantastic.
Hmm, so Biz and Zayne were attacked at the same time. That’s why that cold pill detail was in there way back. I’ve been trying to figure out what was always planned and what was quick re-working but Brennan is so good I can never really tell.
Are multiple unrelated groups just getting into palimpsests at the same time? Or mostly unrelated groups tied to one person?
“We are not gonna get our security deposit back.”
RIZ’S DAD IS JAMES BOND! YES! I didn’t know I wanted that to be the case until it happened and now that’s the only acceptable option. 
Riz didn’t get the 20′s he needed when fighting Aelwen but man he got it at the best story moment this week.
Oh man that home movie
The pearl is grey. Interesting. 
“Mom our family is so awesome Mom we’re all so badass, I thought it was just us but Dad is awesome too, why didn’t you tell me Mom?”
Sklonda: Internally screaming. 
Man he went full Inigo Montoya.
“I’ve got nimble escape so…”
“I guess we have a two bedroom,” I think was a really underrated funny line.
Did Riz ever tell his mom about the time of death thing.
Everyone inundating Gilear with overlapping chatter.
lol the Hangman likes Zelda’s family
Ally’s panicked, “FUCK” is always hilarious. 
Why are all the adults in Gorgug’s life trying to get him laid?
OK so the elementals were conjured by Aelwn’s magic Brennan said. He said by Aelwen’s magic, not by Aelwen. I wonder if that turn of phrase was specific or arbitrary. Like, we were told where Aelwen is but we don’t know. Was she forced to do it (either by threat or by magic)? Clearly someone (Biz?) is pulling her strings to at least some degree. 
“It’s probably about marriage.” “WAR HAS BEEN DECLARED.”
That happened fast
Fun fact from my International Law class: When a government kidnaps someone, it’s called rendition. 
“There’s a war, fuck school.”
Yeah it is wild that Adaine’s parents didn’t call her.
OK so did the Elves get Aelwen back but also go, “But you still need to go to jail.” Because they cut Brennan off before the end of that sentence which might have had more clues in it.
“I text my mom k”
I also wanna know who gave Kristen a slushy marg (It’s war times. I bet things are looser now)
Murph’s face when Brennan said, “Lucky Stones” was so good. That was so Riz.
S/O to Ally for pre-casting Guardian of Faith. Good instinct. 
AHHHHHH BIZ
As I said in an earlier conversation s/o to Adaine for DUNKING on him at every opportunity because he DESERVED IT. Also, her instincts for who sucks in this game have been spot on.
Another s/o to Riz for having the presence of mind to not pull a Star Lord and to pretend to be on the bad dude’s side for long enough to gain some kind of upper hand.
OK, wow was not expecting that twist. I feel like I need to go back and rewatch some stuff to get a better handle of the timeline and stuff. Like, when exactly did the girls start going missing again? And what year is Biz? Has he been masterminding this whole thing? I feel like no but I feel like he’s masterminding his own thing which happens to a puzzle piece in something bigger? BUT IT’S A PRETTY DAMN BIG PIECE. Who opened the new arcade? Is it connected to the bank?  How did Biz get involved? Who’s his supplier? Did someone hook up Biz, Daybreak, Penelope, and Aelwen with Palimpsests to do their own separate things, hoping that at least one of them would succeed which would somehow be good for the mystery person? I am so excited to find out and I really hope Brennan and the cast do a Q+A sesh after S1 is over to hash some stuff out.
Siobhan’s face when Biz said he was going after Adaine.
ALSO, you’re just gonna TELL RIZ and you wanna PUT ONE OF HIS BEST FRIENDS into a MAGIC CRYSTAL???? AND YOU THOUGHT HE’D BE ON BOARD? Like, even if he was, what about the 4 other people who are there?????
(sidenote, wild Gorgug’s parents just left them alone, no questions asked)
Theme-wise, this is the fight ep I’m most excited for. It seems rad as hell.
All that yelling in the promo for next week. Either the raddest thing possible happened or there was a TPK. There is no other option.
Wow, that was a stellar ep and this is a really long post. I really can’t wait for next week’s!
Edit: I meant to say before, is Penelope’s FB album like…a hit list? Like does whoever’s doing the actual dirty work (Biz? S/o else?) know that whoever she takes a picture with is who they should target?
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jq37 · 5 years
Note
I'll be the one that bites the bullet. Fantasy High episode 11--thoughts?
**spoilers for cool kids, cold case**
Hoo boy. 
That could be my entire write up honestly because, geez ya'll. 
Let's break it down. 
Sidenote, I just got mildly into Overwatch so every time I say that and I say it a fair amount, I hear Lucio in my head. 
Anyway, like I said in an earlier post, I'm now pretty sure that the bloodrush fight didn't go the way Brennan expected. Like either he didn't expect them to win or that they would win but not kill Daybreak because there was so much exposition and change and repositioning in this episode. It was a lot like the first session with all the setup. It's like he needed to get them on a new trajectory so he took an episode to time jump and change the status quo before--BAM. But we're getting to that.
In another show or even another episode of this show, the opening convo with Ragh might have been the wildest part of the ep. There’s just so much to unpack there.
Fig making him kowtow to Gorgug and everyone being like dude, stop making it weird. 
Before she did that, Emily paused and you could just see every other person looking like “What insane thing is gonna come out of her mouth now?”
Kristen getting the scoop on his super gay dreams. 
Adaine trying to get him to got to therapy (and also to realize that he's gay). 
The group whole ass making him cry for possibly the first time?
Fabian trying to shut everything down.
“You’re cumming from your eyes.”
 Kristen, please stop. I’m begging you. 
As I suspected, the group reached the point of yeah, we NEED to call Riz's mom this ep. Like, they *had* to call her. You can only realistically take shenanigans so far before it becomes straight unrealistic to not just call a responsible adult. 
And, speaking of, yay! We got to see a little of everyone’s parents just like I wanted/predicted. 
We actually got a lot of stuff from my wishlist. There’s so much time jumping and stuff in this episode I don’t even know where to start. 
This is probably the wrong place to start but I remember wondering what their Christmas equivalent was because they can’t have Christmas because of the Christ thing so when they were like Solstice I was like, oh duh. It’s literally right there. How could I miss it.
OK I guess 
Christmas Solstice party at Gorgug’s house! I knew his house would end up being the hang house.  
Sklonda handled the situation pretty close to how I thought she would. I really think Brennan was forced into a, “This adult is too responsible to not wipe out my next ten plot points over the course of a week,” corner and that’s why he had to pivot. More on that later.
Fabian just refusing to eat any of the fast food she got them.
I totally forgot Adaine has diplomatic immunity. Which actually means she’s the ideal Bad Kid to do anything shady they need done, even though that’s not really her style.
Unlike, other people
We’re getting there
I’m glad Brennan drew the line at Kristen’s parents actively being in a cult. He was like, OK no. They’re willfully ignorant but they’re not PART OF THE CULT.
I also think it’s interesting that they didn’t actually kick her out? Like they sorta kinda did but not really because it seems like she’s couch surfing of her own volition a little and staying home sometimes too? I wonder how her brothers are doing.
Both of Fig’s dads just work at her school now. I wonder is they commiserate about her w/ Goldenhoard.
I can’t believe Brennan is letting her just ruin the life of this random, full-adult dwarf doctor. Like, imagine if any adult in her life found out about that.
Brennan says bud a lot. Almost as much as he says rad.
Gorgug choosing playing the drums as his proficiency, but not well. Just, like, a simple drum beat. Bro. Why.
Adaine’s makeover!
I knew we were gonna get to see that. Or at least I really hoped we would.
And it was in boutique setting similar to what I imagined. A little surprised that she went straight for the jeans and t-shirt thing but dope. I want fan-art. 
Also, if I hadn’t already been convinced, that scene would have convinced me that Fabian got everyone the gifts (before it was confirmed later).
“You’d look nice as a sailor.” Is that like a pirate thing, bro?
Real talk, does Fabian for-real, for-real have a crush on Adaine low key?He’s complimented her looks more than once, which he hasn’t done with the other girls. They’re at a similar social class which might be a factor. And he clearly has a thing for blond elves.
WE’LL GET TO IT. 
I am Concerned about Adaine’s jean jacket, regardless of how dope it is.
Someone needs to talk to Fig about the rat thing. Possibly also Emily. 
42069 LANE (or whatever it was). I hate that I love Brennan for that.
“The worst thing about you is that you’re rich.”
But aww, Fabian. I’m glad it ended up being him (and shoutout to the anon who pointed that out to me). This is exactly the character growth I wanted from him.
When Gorthalax said that tryouts had already happened, I was legit upset for Fabian for a sec. Also, how did I know Gorgug was gonna somehow end up on the bloodrush team?
Guys I feel like there’s still a million more things to talk about.
Adaine finding out about Riz’s dad. God I hope there’s a heart to heart soon but she won’t just drop that info unless she has a really good reason.
GILEAR. I can’t believe that was him on a NAT 20. God, he has zero game. Also, imagine Fig and Riz as siblings. Lord.
The return of Tracker. I was concerned that she was in college but she’s like a Sophomore so Kristen is good to go as soon as she stops being a total disaster so actually that’s probably a moot point. 
Sidenote, kinda surprised that she’s a cleric. I thought she was off religion totally but I guess she just switched. But I feel like it’s hard to be totally non-religious in a world where gods 100% for sure exist?
Adaine going, “Mrs. Gukgak. Actually Captain Gukgak,” to her racist-ass dad gave me life. 
OK so re: the whole conversation about perditional contradoxy and treaties and war and such. How much of that was in the plan and how much of that was last minute retooling by Brennan? Because, I’m going to be honest. If it wasn’t for that comment by Siobhan, I would never have guessed that we were off the rails. But, with that in mind, this feels like the work of a GM who needs to keep the game going because things ended up moving too quickly.
It does answer the question of where the story is going now that the Harvestmen seem to be taken care of. I was a little surprised when Brennan was like, “Yeah Riz’s mom gets them all arrested,” because I’d assumed that the bad guy was going to be just the higher guy on the totem pole. 
OK, I’m sure I’m missing some things because this was a JAM PACKED ep so, if I missed something you wanted my thoughts on, please tell me and I’ll be super happy to write more words but let’s get into that scene. 
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
OK OK OK
Before we start, I’m so pumped about all of this development but I hate how often I’m going to have to type the word Eolwyn because my fingers refuse to accept that that’s how that’s spelled.
ANYWAY
Dude, the pacing, switching between Adaine and home and the rest of the gang at the party. Like, I knew what the reveal had to be as soon as she walked in but I was still like, “Oh my God. Oh my GOD.”
Sidenote: It was very convenient for Brennan that Adaine never actually read those books because it was an easy and non-cheating way to dole out exposition now, later in the game.
What were the mechanics of Adaine not being invited to that party? Did Eolwyn specifically get her not invited? Did she actually get invited but couldn’t go because of the dinner at home? Did all her friends still decide to go, knowing she wasn’t invited? Was she OK with that? How exactly did that go down?
EOLWYN
BUSTING into that party
Magicking up a bunch of LOVE SLAVE PUPPETS
SNORTING magic coke
Playing Spin the Bottle DEATH ROULETTE 
MAKING OUT WITH FABIAN
CUT TO: I’M GOING TO KILL MY SISTER
DAMN BRENNAN, I did NOT Expect you to go THAT hard.
AND THEN IT KEPT GOING
Assuming they all live, I can’t WAIT for the, “YOU KISSED MY SISTER????” conversation. 
Which means they’ve either never met Eolwyn or only in passing and not enough to remember her. 
Shoutout to Riz for being the only person to give Adaine a heads up. 
Her eyes glow blue when she does certain types of magic so I’m just picturing her walking into that room, eyes blazing blue, ready to F up her sister (even BEFORE she finds out what’s going on).
I don’t remember if she called Eolwyn a c**t in this ep or the promo for next but I was like, “Oh damn.” Like you got her to escalate her cursing that much that quickly? Damn.
Also, I love that when she’s really upset, Adaine skips the magic and just starts hitting people. 
OK, so remember in the first ep when Eolwyn tried to have Adaine steal that book? The book that I’m pretty sure is the one they mentioned as having wards on it to keep monster stuff from happening at school? So, here’s what I want to know. Has Eolwyn always been a part of this? Because, clearly, it looks like she is right now. But it’s possible the original intent was that she wanted to get Adaine to do it as a prank, not knowing it was important and then, Brennan checked his notes while salvaging the plot and decided to work it in.  
Also, unlikely, but imagine if Eolwyn somehow induced Adaine’s panic attack during her entrance exam to Hudol specifically so she would fail, have to go to Augefort, and steal the book for her. Wouldn’t that be wild?
Idek what else to say about that last ten minutes or so that isn’t just incoherent, Ally-esque screeching.
I have to say, battle eps are never my faves but I’m looking forward to this one more than any other one so far. 
Man, I can’t believe I thought Eolwyn asking for that textbook might turn into a sister bonding moment. Lol @ past me.
Anyway, kick her ass Adaine!
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jq37 · 5 years
Note
Can I ask for your thoughts on the newest Fantasy High ep? I enjoyed it, but honestly I'm more excited for the next episode based on that preview...
**even more spoilers for the sisterly showdown**
OK, I’m back for Hot Takes: Part 2. 
First, just a few stray things I forgot last time:
I’m sure Adaine is enjoying having bested Aelwen (yeah,spelling #3 guys) in the moment but I can’t imagine she’s gonna enjoy all these nerds making cow eyes at her if her time in the AV office is any indication. Though, to be fair, these nerds could have more game.
“OOPS BITCH.” Siobhan with the awesome episode enders back to back.
Anyone who saw Fabian jump on the Hangman, make a lap while on fire, and then come back, still on fire, was probably like, “Classic Fabian.” I wouldn’t even question it. Very on brand. 
Did y’all notice that at a certain point of the fight, everyone clearly went “Game Face” and started playing to win? Like they were joking a lot less and getting all quiet. I was almost holding my breath for them at points. I am convinced they were all having war flashbacks to the first fight. I know I was. 
OK, on to new business!
I think I’m on record as saying that combat is my least fave part of RPGs.You’re spending a lot of time IRL to cover relatively small amounts of time in story and I especially dislike RPGs that use initiative based fighting systems (which is most of them I think) because then you end up with situations like in this ep where Siobhan kept  wanting to attack Aelwen but she couldn’t react when it would make sense for her to do so because she rolled low on initiative. And it’s where most of the rules of the game are and it can get nitty gritty when I prefer to loose, sandbox-y elements of an RPG.
I want to also reiterate that I think Brennan does a fantastic job of making the combat fun to watch by having inventive fight themes and the rest of the cast is fun no matter what.
That being said, I far and away prefer the story episodes to the combat ones and the entire ep I was like, “OK, but then I’m gonna have to wait a whole week for the conversation that happens after this fight,” WHICH IS THE PART YOU WANT TO SEE OBVIOUSLY.
So I am also more looking forward to the aftermath of the fight than I was the fight itself (although the little bit we got of Adaine getting to finally beat Aelwen was great). Here’s a shot list of things I want addressed/am looking forward to.
What exactly is Aelwen’s part in this? Mastermind? Doubt it. Pawn? Maybe. Being magically manipulated? I mean, possible but I kinda hope she’s just Like This. Anyway, if everything is going to end up dovetailing together (like these stories usually do) and Aelwen is a part of the Palimpsest conspiracy which was part of the Harvestmen’s attempted hit on Kristen which was part of the effort to start a war I’m curious about what reason Aelwen would have to want a war. Like, is that conducive to her lifestyle? Does she know about the war thing specifically or does she just know that s/t shady is happening and if she doesn’t ask too many questions, she’s in the clear? Brennan, fighting slime monsters is great but I have story questions. 
They basically have Aelwen dead to rights on this, but I wonder how she’s gonna play this. She doesn’t strike me as the spill guts immediately type. And she should be smart enough to play the diplomatic immunity card. But I hope we at least get some info out of her. 
Man I hope Riz’s mom gets to arrest her. Which would lead to Mr. Abernant yelling at her which would lead to Adaine yelling at him which she should more because it’s great.
 If Fabian lays low, he’s probably gonna get away with the whole kissing Adaine’s sister thing. She really did not care AT ALL compared to how pissed she was at Aelwen, even before she started actively trying to kill them. On the other hand, she could just be prioritizing and Fabian’s still in for it a, “What the hell, man?” Even if she’s not actively mad at him, this won’t be a point in his favor if he ever decides to make a move on her in the future (which it looked like he might).
I wonder how much, if anything, Mr. Abernant knows about Aelwn’s extracurricular activities. Because either he doesn’t know what she’s up to or he does but he’s in denial and/or protecting the family name. I wouldn’t even be asking the question except for that clip of  him being all, “You can’t jail a diplomat’s daughter!” Although, wouldn’t it be wild if it turned out he was talking about Adaine instead of Aelwen there?
And what’s up with Aelwen and Ostentasia? What did she know? What was she helping her with? Did Aelwen have this whole party set up just to get a good chance to snatch her? 
Y’all, there are 4 episodes left. FOUR. We’re getting close to the endgame. There’s not a lot of time to introduce a new set of antagonists, you know? So I feel like next ep has to drop some pretty major info bombs. Especially since we still haven’t addressed all the weird crap Adaine found in her sister’s room. See, the conversation right after the fight! That’s where the magic happens. 
Riz’s dad! I’ve been waiting for this to go down since the graveyard ep and it looks like it finally will! In the promo, Riz says, “Hey Mom. I know about dad.” Which is kinda throwing me for a loop because either that means he doesn’t know exactly how his dad died and Adaine tells him or (the more intriguing option) something even wilder went down which Sklonda is keeping from him and Riz is about to have a storm coming.
“Detect maiden.” MMM ominous. So, is this an classic maiden sacrifice for big spell thing we’re leading up to?
KVX? Ominous again. 
I’ve been meaning to say this. Wasn’t it established in E1 that the setting of FH is this weird little area of the world that happens to look like a modern irl suburb, and the rest of the world is like a normal DnD setting? I didn’t think that would end up mattering since the story has so far been confined to the immediate area but if war ends up happening, it could factor in. 
Also, Adaine finally read that book on Aguefort which raised a lot of questions and suggested time travel might become a factor at some point? Which would be WILD. Imagine Back to the Future but instead of Marty it’s Fig. The timeline would be in shambles.
Brennan keeps mentioning this Nightmare King person and I’ve been keeping that in the back of my head all season, waiting for it to pop up because I refuse to be blindsighted.
And, speaking of, that ice cream later wish is still in play. Don’t think I’ve forgotten.
So yeah! Next episode should drop some big story bombs and I’m SUPER pumped. Lemme know if I missed anything you wanted to hear about. 
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jq37 · 5 years
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any predictions for next episode? any more thoughts on what happened this episode? everyone says this every episode but it sure was wild
I’ve been sitting on this ask for 5 whole-ass days just trying to gather my thoughts because, yeah, I do say it every week but this ep was especially wild.
I think that before I can talk about what I think is going to happen, I have to talk about what I thought was supposed to happen.
Now, before I watched the ep, I thought this fight was gonna go something like the graduation scene from Buffy because those kids came strapped and they weren’t even adventurers. They just happened to live by a hellmouth. But everyone basically dipped immediately. Now, in fairness, the bad kids are probably overleveled compared to even the seniors considering they keep going on side adventures, but man that was some weak sauce. I really wanted whoever had the highest charisma stat (Fabian or Fig I’m guessing) to give a speech, roll something crazy, and get some backup.
Like I said in a previous ask, I went into the last ep curious about what form it would take because a battle ep alone wouldn’t be enough to wrap everything up, surely. I thought they it might have been planned as a battle length ep with an extra hour or so tacked on for story and epilogueing.
I also don’t think Brennan wanted a TPK. Like, who is that fun for? Not the players who have gotten super attached to their characters by this point. Not the people paying for Dropout subscriptions. But he also made the fight pretty freaking hard. Penelope and Dayne were pretty strong mini bosses (even though they got Dayne super fast), they came into the fight at half strength, the first part of the fight had a keep away element, Goldenhoard was strong before her turned into a dragon, and then he turned into a freaking dragon. I think having Ragh there to recruit and the roll for police mechanic were meant to alleviate the sheer difficulty of the fight, but you can only rely on the luck of the die so much (something Brennan must have re-learned when he let Ally roll for a potentially story breaking action). The deck was really stacked against them. So I feel like he had a plan for a party wipe. I mean, he’s had two players die before. It’s very possible his plan was that they would all wipe, meet up in heaven, chat with Aguefort, and then come back and finish the fight, maybe after some kind of sacrifice. I think Brennan would end the series with one, maybe two significant deaths, or a full party wipe IF they specifically were making a choice to make a Big Damn Hero sacrifice. It wouldn’t be narratively satisfying if everyone just died, you know? And he knows there’s an audience element to what he’s doing. 
I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s extremely wild that no one has been super concerned about Adaine’s jacket to this point. Like, I would have asked someone about it. Done some investigation. At the very least, used it more. But Adaine was basically like: Dope Jacket. +5 to Self Esteem. There’s potentially a whole plot alley we’re missing because no one’s asked the right (or any) questions.
Also wild that Gorgug can’t even look Zelda in the eye when he talks to her but he full on kissed Ragh on the lips to get him to stop beating him up. lol Imagine if he’d tried that when Fabian punched him in ep 1.
I wonder if the cast is gonna be in formal wear again next ep.
OK, I’ve gotten off topic. Back to how things were supposed to go/predictions.
I think the parents have to come into play somehow. Obvious Sklonda should be on her way and Gorthalax has shown up but Fig’s mom went off to presumably where the girls are and we need to find out how that goes. Less obviously, I think Adaine’s mom and Fabian’s are going to end up on the board. I dunno what Fabian’s mom is good for but her last appearance was her picking up a sword as Fabian rushed out which felt foreshadow-y. Anyway, if she can’t fight, she’s still rich. She can do something. And she’s a high elf so maybe she can help out smoothing things over with Falinel. Speaking of, there’s still a war on which Adaine’s family played a part in starting. If Adaine’s mom wants to follow up on her one hint that she’s not a total garbage person, now would be the time.
Adaine is the elven oracle. I feel like that has to be relevant to the fight somehow. Like, it would be weird it the only thing that played into was that she could pick up the book, right? (Unless there was gonna be a S2 where that would be explored. Sidenote, I am starting to feel like next season might be different characters, same setting. That’s still not my main theory, but we’re leaving a lot of story on the table potentially. Although I did see they might be doing a comic? Idk). Of all the knocked out people (minus Kristen who is about to avenging angel rise from the dead) Adaine is probably in the best position because she’s with Fabian who is the only conscious party member. So that’s good I guess. 
I just took a look at the prophecy and it has two parts. The first part says the things that need to happen before Kalvaxus can be released (K beholds his treasure, 7 maidens chained, war befalls the realm, king and queen crowned). All that happened. Kalvaxus was released. They can’t stop it at this point (barring time travel, which, to be fair, was mentioned earlier). The second part of the prophecy is the consequences: Kalvaxus will be released, his destruction will know no bounds, the sun shall fall from the Heavens, and the world as we know it shall perish forever. 
Two parts of that strike me as especially significant. There’s the sun falling from the Heavens part. That implies Sol, right? Especially with the capitalized “Heavens”. So that doesn’t sound good.
And the second part is “the world as we know it shall perish forever”. That doesn’t mean the world is going to end, necessarily. That means the world is going to CHANGE. Which makes me wonder if THAT is/was the planned endgame for the season. The bad kids fail to prevent the prophecy and things change in a drastic way which is why the setting for next season is super different. 
And, back to the party wipe, Brennan didn’t seem very fazed as the entire party was dropping like flies, but he was *shook* when Ally rolled that 20 at the end. Like, compare that to the ep where Siobhan said they jossed his plans or Lou’s awesome nat 20 to beat a nat 20. In the first case, he didn’t react at all. In the second case, he celebrated with everyone else. When Ally did it, he was sitting there slack jawed. The healer rezzing should be a best case scenario, right? It gives the rest of the party a fighting chance. And, clearly, it wasn’t what he was expected and he wasn’t excited. It makes me feel like he wanted a party wipe for some reason. 
Anyway, I’m sure I’m forgetting something but that’s what I got for now. 
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