#it’s rebloggable if you need it

[fuckedliar]

Hey you, yeah you cmere. You’re doing good, hell you’re doing great. I know it doesn’t seem like it or feel like it and you may be thinking I’m full of shit, but I’m not. You’re wonderful and your muse? Amazing. I know you’re thinking now you’re definitely bull shitting me, but I’m not. No one else can write your muse the way YOURE writing them. It’s impossible, only your interpretation will ever exist because someone else’s could NEVER be yours. Don’t give me that look, yknow the one like ‘how is that a good thing?’ Well I’ll tell you smart ass, it means that there is no wrong way to write the way you do. You make your own rules, your own worlds and your own vibes — why do you think your brain is your biggest enemy? You can’t have the good without the bad so someone’s gotta do it unfortunately, being our own enemy makes us deal some low blows. But just like we tell our friends when their brains are being mean, we have to sometimes look into our own mind and tell our doubts to fuck off. I mean scream it, loud as you can and the silence that follows? It fucked off. Wanna know why? Because your doubt is a liar, that’s all it’ll ever tell you. It’s never told you a truth and it won’t so why listen to it, so pick your pretty chin up. Get you a good snack — better yet get a fucking amazing snack you love and tell yourself one kind thing. Because you are one in a gazillion and that’s the factual truth, there will only ever be one of you — who talks, thinks, listens and feels like you do. It seems scary right? But it’s not, because there are a million other little universes jammed into flesh and bone with their hands held out to you. You’re not alone, you’re not your doubts, you are wonderful and it shines through what you do — like your muses and writing. Be kind, be patient, and know you’re loved.

#|[ psa #|[ ooc #it’s rebloggable if you need it

[manofbeskar]

the baby is hungry

#i desperately need fic of mishanks adopting s hawk #thank you to one reblogger for this idea #i don't remember your username but i remember your reblog #my art #s-hawk #s hawk #one piece #dracule mihawk #shanks #red haired shanks #akagami no shanks #hawkeyes mihawk #taka no me mihawk #mishanks #akataka #mihawk x shanks #shanks x mihawk

[kedreeva]

as someone who is ace and entering college years, how has your dating life been as an ace? what other struggles have there been that you have advice for? i dont know any aces or similar around me older or otherwise. thank you for your time and i hope you have an easy day!

Okay this will get a little long so I'll put it behind a cut

Honestly I'm probably not the best person to ask, since I never really...struggled? Not specifically with asexuality or with anything related to it. I can tell you my experiences, though, and you can decide if there's anything worthwhile to take away from it!

I grew up in a house run by science and math. I knew the prefix a- meant without/not and I knew there was heterosexual and bisexual and homosexual, so when young and, importantly, before really ever interacting with other queer folk, I went Ah ha, these are (prefix)(sexual) and so therefore I am asexual (without sexuality), and that was that. That was literally all the thought I gave to it. People had crushes on other people, I didn't have crushes on people, end of story. If, for some reason, I developed a crush on someone, I would deal with it then.

Maybeeeee midway through HS, a very good friend of mine asked me about it, and I said well, some people like everyone the same, and I dislike everyone the same. And she said well, then it sounds like you like everyone the same, that amount is just zero, so that seems like bisexual? (she didn't know the term asexual was an actual sexuality term either at that point, just the biological term for reproduction and, well, I could reproduce theoretically so couldn't be that) And I said well, alright then, and called myself bisexual for the next 6 or 7 years. THEN I found out asexuality is a sexuality not just a mode of reproduction and I said Ah Ha, I was Correct, and that was that again.

So I guess if I was offering advice it would be... you know you. Don't let someone else tell you about you if you think they're wrong. Make up a word if there isn't one. Use a new word if you find one that already exists and fits.

Also, that it's fine to not worry about it. Literally it's fine to just never think about it if you have better things to do. I think a lot of people get really wrapped up in finding the right label and/or "what happens if-" when like... you're not a canned good. You don't need a label. Worry about what-ifs when they come up, don't borrow anxiety if you can help it.

I dated a few people in HS, like... three people I think, and one Almost. One predatory mistake I thankfully recognized (HEY because I had older folks online I could talk to about it!) and got out of quickly, and one hot mess relationship that was a LOT of fun- my boyfriend, Sark, and then his ex-girlfriend, and then I stepped out so they could get back together, and then they said wait no, and invited me back in, and that went on for most of the end of HS, and nearly into college, when I stepped out again (and peacefully, I am still friends with both of them and I married Sark in the end). There was one guy whom I was always, perpetually, extremely fond of, and we hung out a lot, kissed once, and I think we would have had a lot of fun dating, but ultimately it was a near miss that became a fond memory, because we were never in the right place together. Sometimes life does that, and that's okay, too.

In college, I simply didn't date anyone. I had better things to do. I met my best friend, @idkfandomwhatever, online that year (and still talk to her almost daily, sometimes for hours, despite that we are on opposite sides of the world!!), and in person @mishapeep who was the best roomie I ever had (hi!!!!! i love you!!!). I had great friends, I went on a TON of adventures, worked a cool job where I had awesome coworkers, and just all around had a blast learning stuff and napping in sunbeams or on couches at the food court. A couple of guys made passes, and I turned them down because I just wasn't into it, and we remained friends. There was one coworker at my dispatch job that I got along with like a house on fire, and everyone ELSE thought we should be dating, but neither of us ever brought it up- I can't say why he didn't for sure, but I know I never brought it up because I was 85% sure he didn't swing for the right team to date me, which I ALSO never brought up until he found me on facebook years later to tell me about his husband running for local election somewhere. so. again, don't let anyone else tell you what to do lol there was ALSO another guy that I had NO interest in that spent a lot of time around me, but we mostly sat in my bunk watching Queer as Folk, which I KNOW was his first exposure to queer material. I never talked about queer stuff with him otherwise, but I heard from a mutual friend of ours that he's also happily married to his husband. Sometimes just being yourself, openly and without shame about it, does more than you think, even if it's not doing anything directly for you (but it is, it's good for you too).

SINCE college ended, I dated one guy I met through an online game and that was great in person briefly, but ultimately didn't work out because he couldn't be a nice person, another guy I met through the same online game and that didn't work out at ALL in person, and then I started hanging out with Sark and co again. I was on the phone with him driving somewhere, and I said something to the effect of someday you're gonna find a gf and she's not gonna want you to keep going on adventures with your ex, and we won't be able to talk anymore and I had a real recordscratch moment where I realized absolutely NOT on MY watch, I wanted that boy in my life forever actually, and we've been married now for... this is year 8.

I may have landed in a soft place, but I didn't seek it out. I just lived my life and didn't worry about my sexuality or about who I was or wasn't gonna date. When I DID date, I was up front about what I wanted from any of those relationships and part of the problem with the relationships that didn't work out was sometimes that I did not KNOW what I wanted, yet. But, it was IMPORTANT I think, that I gave the chances I did, because I did learn about myself and what I wanted. That's probably the hardest fucking thing to learn, that relationships sometimes happen not because they're likely to be permanent, but because it may be fun or be a way to learn what you do or don't want. Maybe alongside of that, the lesson that it's okay to go "hm, actually this is Not For Me" and exit peacefully whenever possible. But it's okay to give temporary things a shot and see how it goes, even knowing up front it may be temporary (honestly maybe that even takes some of the stress of it off? if you don't have to worry about it being forever, and you don't have to worry about "what if I never experience other things," and you don't worry so much about messing it up so it feels easier to take chances saying and doing stuff you might otherwise consider too risky to ask for etc).

I'm aware I'm lucky that things went pretty smoothly for my entire life so far, insofar as dating or sexuality is concerned. Part of that was definitely because even the worst of the people I dated weren't really all that bad of people. A lot of it was that I just didn't date if I didn't want to. I didn't care about sex, so I didn't have sex for the first time until a few years after college, and only one guy ever pushed the issue at all (the guy in HS I immediately dropped all contact with).

The thing is... I dated or nearly dated like ten people, flirted with countless others (because it's FUN), and the only one I still have regular contact with (not just occasional friendly hellos) is the one I kept at the end.

But the friends I made in college? I kept a lot of those. I still talk to several of my college friends on a regular basis. I have made other friends since, some of whom I talk to every day, some of whom have become irregular contacts I am still fond of. But those bonds are important and the ones you make with your friends from here out do have the potential to span at least huge chunks of your life, if not the entirety of it. If you only take away one thing from this little novel...take that knowledge.

also this has nothing to do with asexuality but for pete's sake find SOME kind of hobby club to be a part of, or make one if there isn't one, follow your stupidest instincts for adventure on occasion (like playing freeze tag frisbee in a lightning storm on the PAC lawn at 11pm until the campus cops show up to make you go home), and take at least one "fuck it this sounds fun" class. Mine was archery at 7am, the only early-morning class I ever took. Worth it, we were all TERRIBLE but god it was awesome.

Good luck out there!

#you are always welcome to come talk if you need to #asks or chats or whatever #I will not always have answers or advice but I can listen #asexuality #asks #stories about ked's life #I'm leaving this rebloggable because I KNOW there are older aces following me #and y'all have got stories to tell too if you want to speak up

[originalaccountname]

tiny guy in a BLANKET NEST wearing a T-SHIRT

#non-rebloggable you'll get the whole deal later #text blurred because i'm taking it out of context but you can have fun trying to guess who is saying what #ok i just checked and the tiny dazai angst had 37 panels #this one has at least 32 so far and i NEED to finish planning the last part #i need this to be done i've been on and off it for too long #apparently i talk sometimes

[crimeboys]

i’ve seen a lot of people wondering what they “should do” in terms of stuff like fanfiction/fanart and their enjoyment of dsmp, and you have gotta take a step back man. we are on like day 3 of learning that wilbur soot’s a piece of shit and most decisions you make/thoughts you have are going to be heavily based on emotional responses, which is very fair, but most of these decisions do not need to be made right now. most of these thoughts are just going to send you spiraling.

it feels like the end of the world, it feels like everything you love is ruined, but at the end of the day a shitty guy made something you love and now you still have that love. this has unfortunately been happening since the beginning of time. i remember when the dream situation happened, i thought i would never be able to write about dsmp again, especially not about his character. i got through a lot of that time period by writing a fic where cdrm was not involved whatsoever which helped me not spiral from thinking about the character to the guy. two months afterward, i drafted up an idea for a story where cdrm was the main character and have not looked back.

shit like this takes time and you don’t need to make every single decision in every single aspect of your life that this guy touched right this second. you’re stressing yourself out about things that ultimately don’t really matter right now. focus on yourself, your safety and comfort, and if you can, sharing what shelby talked about in her stream in the hopes of helping out other people who were/are abused and what those signs can be. everything is new and shitty, give yourself time to breathe.

#text post #mine #abuse #not making this rebloggable bc i think it’s important but i dont think it should be the focus of anything i was just seeing a lot of despai #specifically about writing fics and stuff and like? just dont think about the rn fr. you’ll figure it out eventually you do not need to #stress yourself out about it constantly. watch a shitty show hang out with your friends do anything else than think about every single #action you are going to take in the aftermath of something that Just happened

[fairuzfan]

it annoys me when people all categorize palestinians as purely arabs. armenian palestinians have contributed greatly to our visual culture and that deserves to be recognized. just wanted to point out that not all palestinians are arabs, though a majority are. but that might be going too deep into the woodworks of semantics for this point in time. maybe we will find a word that better encompasses the diversity of palestinians — wait. that's it. palestinians is diverse enough, isn't it?

#this is just a diary entry at this point #not gonna make it rebloggable #just wanted to point our palestinians in palestine are quite diverse #i mention armenian palestinians contributing to our collective culture because its important to point it out #not that you need to contribute to a culture to be part of it necessarily

[the-kipsabian]

a quick hot guide for people that struggle commenting on fics aka things authors love to hear and youre just over thinking it and its actually really simple to leave comments on stuff!!

key smash/emoji spam/reaction image/etc (it conveys emotions way more than you might think)

drop a line you really liked

say how much you love a ship/character and how happy you are that theres content about them

ALL CAPS ANYTHING

"i liked/loved/enjoyed/whatever it!" its better to say the most basic thing than saying nothing tbh; writers appreciate hearing anything over nothing 💜

"thank you for writing this" its short, sweet, and very powerful

think what kind of feedback you'd personally like to receive on a piece of art you made. try to translate that want into comments you leave for other people too

you dont have to be critical or constructive or anything, even if the author asks for that stuff in their notes. they'll get it from someone else, you just do you

i feel like people make leaving comments too hard on themselves, so really just make it simple. if you really dont come up with anything, just say thank you. youre there reading for some reason, tell the author what it is. fic comments dont need to be book analysis essays (tho those are. incredibly appreciated as well if you want to write one!!), writers publishing their works for free online appreciate any kind of feedback regardless if you consider it good or well written. a comment is a comment

bottom line is, leave comments on fics and other written works. its whats keeping this game alive

#feel free to add these are just the two cents in my brain rn #also absolutely reblogs encouraged #listen im not just speaking for myself i want to see every fic writer get more comments. more feedback #and dont even get me fucking started on getting reblogs on this goddamn webbed site im gonna blow up otherwise #just. fucking. support your friends. support your favorite creators. say nice shit about them and share their work #i cant believe this needs to be said in fucking 2023 god #im tired can you tell lmao #i also know im a fucking nobody talking about this but fuck if i dont who will ugh #as someone that tries their best to always leave at least a word in everything i read (which admittedly isnt a lot but still) #this is a very important topic to me. okay? okay #again feel free to add to this and its absolutely rebloggable if for nothing else than to remind people to COMMENT ON FICS #night is an absolute mess on main

[anneapocalypse]

My eternal biggest struggles in FFXIV--and really in any game, but it matters way more when you're playing with other people--are visual perception and by extension reaction time. I have figured out just from talking to other people about how they perceive things that I simply do not process visual information as quickly or comprehensively as some people do. If I am focusing on one part of the screen I am not seeing what's happening in the other corner. When I'm looking at the party list I am not seeing my hotbar. When I'm looking at my hotbar I am not seeing the boss's cast bar. And so forth. The ability that most people seem to have to just absorb all or most of the information on their screen just by looking? I don't have that. I have to constantly, consciously be scanning all the places where I know there's important information. It is not automatic.

Which means that unless I know to look for a specific tell--like a specific cast or a symbol over my character's head--there is a good chance I just will not see it. I hesitate to even explain this to people because it sounds like I'm making excuses or not paying attention when I say "I just didn't see it." But it doesn't matter how much I'm paying attention if I don't know what I'm looking for. I will not process it, which is functionally the same as not seeing it.

And I can learn, is the thing. I know to watch for Ancient Flare in Labyrinth of the Ancients. I know that in Shadowbringers onward, where you'll get strings of really unforgiving, rapid-fire AOEs, that it's better to focus on getting myself to safety and sacrifice a heal or two and then do damage control when they let up, than to miss an AOE because I was trying to heal, and die and force another player to interrupt their rotation to rez me. It just takes practice, and there are things I won't get on the first run, no matter how hard I try.

I do care about playing my job well. I watch guides. I practice. I do my best to learn, because I love the game and it's satisfying to play well, especially as a healer--I want to be the kind of healer that when I'm in the party, you know I've got you, that if you mess up I'll catch you, and it'll be fine. Playing a support role well is very, very satisfying and rewarding to me! And so none of the above means I'm not going to do my best, or that I'm not trying to be better.

I don't get better from people yelling at me or calling me stupid. I get flustered, I lose my flow, I blank out on things that actually are obvious. I get worse.

And the all-or-nothing attitudes from that small but real subset of veteran players is just utterly discouraging. "Either you're playing your job correctly or you're sabotaging." "There are no non-obvious mechanics in regular duties." It reads to me as "Be perfect on the first try or go fuck yourself." That is a standard I will literally never be able to meet. And I'm not saying "poor me," that's not my point. Somehow I doubt that it's a standard the majority of players are able to meet--based on my own experiences playing with sprouts in many, many roulettes.

Everyone has to start somewhere. Everyone learns differently, perceives differently, no matter how rigid the rotation of their job, no matter how "obvious" the mechanics. And for someone else who's struggling I would much rather be the person who gave them a better experience in the game than the person who gave them a shittier one. I don't want to be the person who makes someone quit trying to learn tanking for six months (as someone did to me). If you need to vent about how someone sucks, fine, do it in private. And even then, you know, maybe consider how you talk about it and to whom. Are your comments going to be the reason someone in your linkshell is terrified of learning a new role? Or the reason they're excited to try?

Personally I would rather come out of a duty with a party that struggled a bit but pressed on being kind and helping and encouraging one another and celebrated victory together, than leave someone never wanting to play again.

#ffxiv stuff #anne's ishgardian salt rock #i truly do love this game and 99% of my interactions with randos are fine to great #but boy when there's a bad one #it can just be such a kick in the teeth #not making this rebloggable because i don't want my notes full of advice #i promise you i have trusted friends to give me advice when i need it

[iersei]

little preview sketches of me finishing off those hot glenn holiday prompts from a little while back in honor of hot glenn valentine's day! (aka we won a bonus poll, and i'm using it as an excuse to finally do these drawings lol)

valentine's day is a type of holiday. it still counts.

#not putting this one in the tags #or making it rebloggable #you either see it or you don't lol #i just needed to give some warning that yeah. yeah i'm drawing glenn again.

[ransomnote]

this message is specifically for mutuals from my mcr blog days. i have all those fuckers blocked but when the bandom bloggers who full stop made shit up about girlgerard being a zionist to run them off this site start posting about how excited they are to see cobra starship at wwwy/start posting photos from their set/thirstposting over gabe saporta i need you people to call them on that shit hard and fast thank you.

#reblogging is encouraged but only for those who know/witnessed what went down #i love you my regular rebloggers but i Really need this to stay in the sphere of people who know what happened #if any of you who participated in that smear campaign see this know that there are eyes on you.

[bidokja]

hey just so you all know, it is possible to acknowledge how often hsy is sidelined in fandom because of joongdok without being a...lesbophobe? how did you even come to this conclusion in a yaoi related poll. quit that shit. this has been a psa <3

#some of yall are toeing the lineee is2g #not every sangsoo fic/art is because of joongdok in fact i would say the Vast Majority arent from what ive seen #it does exist dgmw but it is extremely rare that i see any joongdok content that's like 'hsy is a lesbian btw'-- #--and then leaves her out of the story #like. you are cherrypicking if you're trying to posit that as a trend lmao #as far as hsy-sidelined-by-joongdok content goes #usually they just. leave her out of the story they dont bother to use her being a lesbian as a cover for it #some of yall are acting like anyone with a lesbian hsy hc is nefarious and i need you to step back and think about why thats kinda bonkers #ky speaks #do i dare leave this one rebloggable...oh well que sera sera #something something why are we pitting two bad bitches against each other lesbian hsy and bi hsy are both great

[black-quadrant]

don’t shit on other people’s ships unless you’re prepared for people to open fire on yours 💀

#it’s so annoyingly childish #you don’t have to understand why someone likes it. you don’t need to pick other people’s ships apart. #why be so negative #it contributes nothing to the world let alone the community #and just damages your fandom’s reputation #idk if ppl don’t realize the impact or just don’t care #it’s all very selfish #rebloggable

[sillyabtmusic]

sooooo obsessed with him here

#ok this isn't an official gif post i just need to show it to you all. therefore no networks but it goes in my gif tag. tehe #still rebloggable if you so fancy its just a personal gif post rather than an Official Gif Post. yknow #* my gifs #kd.gif #kd.jh #this came from I am working on an ivan gifset actually but i saw this scene again and felt crazy #ive never actually made just mv sets but there are some i rlly want to because there's some really niceys shots sniffles #he's so pretty. to me.

[essektheylyss]

Safety tools for games are very well and good and if you and your group need them you should absolutely use them, but sometimes the way people talk about them feels like they are using those tools as a straight-up substitute for, like, working to develop interpersonal skills and the capacity for talking openly with friends.

#that post about 'you call yourself a community organizer but you haven't talked to your roommates in three months' #except it's about ttrpgs #like this is from a person with ADHD who did (and still sometimes do) have pretty severe RSD #and whose sister used to accuse people of cheating and/or straight up flip boards any time she wasn't winning a game #like especially if you find yourself needing to USE the safety tools often... #it might just be a point at which you have to say 'this is not the game environment for me' #and that does NOT need to reflect morally on you or those friends. some people's game styles just are not compatible. #not rebloggable cuz i know people are going to severely misinterpret me particularly if you're removing the context of #'i am also neurodivergent bro.' #not to say that I can comprehend every possible neurodivergent experience #but if anyone comes on here like 'you're only saying that cuz you're neurotypical' i will start biting. #also remembered that quote is from a chris fleming video so late and didn't wanna delete all of my tags to edit and then forgot to note it #but now i have. anyway. unimportant.

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

Hi hello I’m sorry but what exactly happened in wee woo land? I know it was something controversial with Marisol’s actress but I can’t find any details.

It's potentially triggering shit for several reasons so not surprised people aren't circulating what she actually did/said, but here is a post that shows the screenshots:

Here is the original post.

Here is info on where she got that "joke" from.

Here is her "apology."

(thanks to the friends who found me links, I heard about this in DMs so didn't have a link on hand)

Warnings for transphobia, an "it's your fault you were hurt" non-apology that might be triggering to anyone who's experienced an abusive relationship, and general nastiness.

The fandom, understandably, is furious. There you have it.

#mads answers things #I'm letting this one be rebloggable so that people can spread information if it's needed #as someone who is CONSTANTLY out of the loop I understand how frustrating it can be not to know what people are talking about #but I would really recommend you take any venting to that 911teapot blog that's what it's here for #or take it to another blog that's really wanting to dig into the anger of it #just kinda out of energy right now

[devilsskettle]

idk something about this to me seems so like. idk. like you know how people will be like haha i like this bad cringe thing but ONLY ironically because it's cringe :) but actually they just like the thing and they're scared of being judged for it? this is like haha i support women and stand up to men who are being misogynistic but i also need to make it clear that i agree with those men and they're right to hate those women* (*fictional) btw please validate my thoughts and opinions because they still align with misogynistic male behavior while shallowly suggesting that i have a feminist belief system :)

edit: actually though because it just becomes a way to say which female characters you fucking hate while feeling okay about it because it's just a jokey joke we're all feminists here :) and i see hashtag rey from star wars and it's like okay haha i get it she was poorly written by men and highjacked as a character by a notoriously vocal subsection of the fanbase because of a ship or w/e but then i see

and it's like okay well. now i am about to defend a female character with my life after YOU said you didn't like her. why is skyler white a magnet for misogyny and vitriol, she's a fantastic character and she is 100% understandable in her actions given the circumstances she was forced into. fuck you fr

#reading into this WAY too much i'm sure this wasn't the intention #it's funny and true and definitely not that deep but it just rubs me the wrong way idk #like hehehe we all hate female characters :) #nobody can handle even mildly unlikable female characters. we are never getting out of the sexist media landscape we live in rn #and even the little jokey joke saying you defend 'unlikable' female characters from unwarranted sexism needs an asterisk #anyway..... #not even making this rebloggable it is so special snowflake sensitive lmao but i feel that it is true #like i KNOWWWW i know what they mean. i get it. w/e. but also........ idk. why can't you just like female characters more :( #like for real. no asterisk #edit: may be time to rewatch breaking bad ?